#this is crazy since this is from a year ago 😭 i barely remember writing it. if it seems disoriented it's cuz it was written out of order

[a-cloud-for-dreams]

Unreleased & Incomplete #1: Novel Night

There was a knock on the door, ceasing all movement. A moment of silence fell between the two. Salem sucked in a quick breath while Mal simply smirked underneath her.

"Did you want to rendezvous with another lover, kit?" A few strands of Salem's hair slid off her bare shoulders, brushing over her face. She blushed, tinting her cheeks pink. That was all he needed to know.

"Hush! Keep your voice down," she gently slapped Mal's shoulder. He rolled his eyes. The stranger on the other side knocked again, more hesitant this time.

"Salem, are you asleep?"

Aerin.

Mal raised an eyebrow after hearing the prince's voice. She sighed, leaning downward. "I, well...I didn't think he'd actually come here!"

"Did anyone ever teach you that lying is a bad habit?" Mal teased, gripping her waist more tightly.

She scoffs. "Says you!" Salem hesitates for a moment before jumping off the bed and redressing. She threw Mal's clothes at him, who was already settling into her bed under the comforters.

"Already? But we were having so much fun!"

"Who said this would be the end?" she wraps both arms around his neck and whispers in his ear. "It won't be for too long." Mal tilted his head and smiled softly before settling back in. Salem fixed her hair before carefully opening the door to a flustered Aerin.

"Sorry for keeping you waiting," she said apologetically, closing the door behind her. "I didn't think you'd actually come."

A few black curls swept over his face. "Don't worry, I almost didn't."

She chuckled. "Did you want to show me something?" He looked away for a moment, fiddling with one of the rings on his finger.

"You haven't seen the library, have you?"

~~~

The two snuck to the other side of the castle. Aerin's warm hand gently held hers as he led the way. He glanced around the corridors occasionally to ensure they wouldn't get caught. They stopped in front of two double doors. Aerin pulled out a key and explained:

"They lock the doors to protect the books. One of the halls has a secret passageway to the royal archives and the relic room."

"If they're such secretive rooms, should you really be telling someone like me all your secrets?" Salem teased. He smiled, trying to ignore the feeling flushed under her intense gaze.

"Don't worry Salem, I trust that you won't divulge this secret."

She raised her hand to salute. "Ay, my good sir."

He opened the doors and led her inside to the grand room. The rows of bookshelves felt like they stretched out for miles. The shelves stacked up so tall they leveled with the candle-lit chandeliers that must have been hundreds of years old. The floor glowed under the light, contrasted by the harsh shadows under the marble staircases decorating the wooden shelves.

Salem stepped closer to the center of the room and gasped softly. She tucked a strand of her hair behind an ear, practically twirling around in her spot. Her thoughts failed to express themselves coherently.

"It's...beautiful." Kade would have loved it here.

"Yes, I think so too," he said, looking directly at her. His heart skipped a beat, and he stepped closer to face her. Salem smiled and took off towards the alchemy section. He went to follow her, getting lost in thought.

Maybe the Dreadlord was wrong. Maybe he wasn't the unlovable pitiful prince he thought he was. Aerin stopped next to the shelf she was focused on. Her fingers lingered on the spine of every book, her gaze inquisitive. He tilted his head, simply wanting to be in her presence.

Maybe, just maybe, he could be someone. The man he always wanted to be.

Tagging: @malthemagnifisent solely because I think you mentioned at one point you were interested in my other Aerin fics(?) This isn't a full fic or anything but I thought it still counts lol

[marshmallowgoop]

heishin for the ship bingo!

Them!! 😭

They are EVERYTHING to me: Okay, so, I've been familiar with Detective Conan for about a decade, yeah? Ten years ago is around the time that I first started watching the anime, and let me tell you: I don't remember caring for Heishin—or even Heiji!—like, at all back then. (The Reveal (Episodes 57-58) was fun, but I wouldn't say my feelings really went much deeper than that.)

But I've been rewatching, and getting way further than I ever got the first time around, and my fictional taste buds must have changed because these two have now absolutely destroyed me. I wrote my very first DCMK meta about them, and, well, I put this together for another post also about them that I've been working on, the intention being to highlight all the Heiji-Shinichi relationship analyses on my Ramblings page in order emphasize my utter infatuation with this duo, and... yeah.

Of all the Detective Conan essays listed here, 17/43 of them concern Heiji and Shinichi to some extent... and since I only update this page periodically, this list doesn't even include my last Heishin post, which would make the count 18/44.

So, nearly 41% of my writing about this series involves discussion on them... and one of these characters is only included in maybe 10% of the story.

They really, truly are so much to me.

They drive me crazy/insane /pos: Clearly! "Miss Mystery," Opening 33, has me screaming, crying, and throwing up with its depiction of their relationship...

And I flipped through the manga version of Episode 174 for the first time recently (Files 225-230), and the way that Conan imagines Heiji's smiling face when he fears that the worst happened to his friend utterly destroyed me (File 228)...

And one of my GIFs (from Episode 277) got passed around some more a bit ago, and I was once again reminded of how gently Heiji places Conan on the ground, how careful he is regardless of the minimal distance, and I once again felt like the pleading face emoji...

And have I mentioned "Conan's Dream Vacation" enough yet?

I could go on and on and on. (And considering that I've, uh, written a whole Heishin masterpost, I guess I kind of already have.)

Relationship goals <3: They've got problems, absolutely, but the way they just... sync? The way they Vibe? #Goals for sure.

They get each other. Immensely. They finish each other's sentences, come to the same conclusions at once—they both serve as a reminder to the other that they're not alone.

It's easy to meme on this panel of Shinichi in the manga (File 520), but it is beyond sweet to me that he's so eager and excited at the notion of someone just like him.

Heiji and Shinichi are genuinely a place of comfort for each other, and that is the definition of "relationship goals."

I need a 30k hurt/comfort fic on my desk by Monday: Detective Conan seems all but entirely disinterested in depicting its heroic men as vulnerable. Heck, if the "Murderer Shinichi Kudo" case (Episodes 521-523) is any indication, there's the message that a person like Shinichi would never do something like cry. He's too "strong" to.

Needless to say, the sentiment leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Relying on others and crying aren't "weak" things but human things, and one of the biggest draws of Heishin—for me, anyway!—is that Heiji and Shinichi do allow themselves to be vulnerable with each other. Shinichi admits to some of the trauma he's suffered in as soon as his third encounter with Heiji (Episodes 77-78); later, he completely opens up about the pain of hiding his identity from Ran, and he even asks Heiji for advice (Episode 189). Heiji, similarly, isn't too afraid to reveal that he cares deeply for Shinichi to Shinichi's face. He easily conveys how haunted he was by a nightmare in which Shinichi dies, with minimal prompting, in Episode 118. In Episode 479, he also lays his insecurity bare in Shinichi's presence and asks if all the criticism and mockery he's received is warranted.

Canon gives us these crumbs. Fanon can take it so much further. Shinichi spilling out details of how scared he is to Heiji, trying desperately not to freak out or cry, all while Heiji tells him that he can cry when he feels like it, just as Shinichi told Ran when they were in preschool (Episode 854). Heiji actually working through his unhealthy tendency to make everything a competition with Shinichi's help and support.

I think the focus of my last Heishin post, about how the nasty attitude Conan gives Heiji on occasion stems from his resentment that he can't be Shinichi when they're together, also lends itself well to hurt/comfort fic. What if Heiji calls out Conan's cold behavior, and he doesn't act like it's a joke or a minor nuisance for once but really communicates that it hurts to be treated like that, and Shinichi reveals the truth? Or what if Shinichi has a moment of self-reflection and regrets his cruelty when Heiji winds up seriously injured or dead on his behalf?

If you throw in potential romantic feelings, other possibilities open up. It kills Shinichi that he can't hold Ran in his arms (FUNimation's English dub for Episode 42), that he can't tell her he loves her with his own voice (Episode 3), but he doesn't think Ran's aware of his predicament. With Ran, Conan can put on an act and lie and pretend like none of his romantic feelings for her exist, and maybe that provides relief.

But Heiji is well aware of Shinichi's predicament. There's no playing a completely separate, unrelated child with Heiji; Heiji's already broken the illusion, and there's no going back to it. When Shinichi's by Heiji's side, he's by someone whom he can be himself around, whom he can't be anything but himself around, and that's got to make the impossibility of a romantic relationship a pain that festers like an open sore. There's no putting a Band-Aid on this one. No separating himself from the situation. No covering up the sting with an invented personality.

Okay, maybe that's more hurt no comfort, but there is so much potential here, I swear! Heiji isn't just the goofy, silly comic relief guy with the Osaka accent, and his relationship with Shinichi deserves more serious exploration and treatment. I think there's especially a lot that could be done with Heiji's jealousy, and—in my eyes, anyway—it stinks that canon plays Heiji's obsession with one-upping Shinichi's confession to Ran as a joke rather than the sad, insecure thing that it comes off to me as.

They're going to be the death of me: I bought a movie guidebook for The Crimson Love Letter, the 21st Conan film, which I haven't even seen yet, purely because I liked the cover art (and included poster) showing Conan and Heiji being unabashedly happy together...

And I am so tempted to get this Heishin mug set...

And I'm looking to add some Treasured Selection Blu-rays to my largely DVD-comprised DetCo collection, and while I don't believe the Treasured Selection Blu-rays for traditionally animated episodes really increase the quality that much, I'm still thinking I'll get #5 because it has The Boys on the cover (and also includes one of my favorite cases, Episodes 277-278)...

And there's also that merch from Carddass...

If nothing else, these two might be the death of my wallet!

(It's maybe also worth noting that I mostly store my DVDs for this series in 6-DVD cases, so only a select few covers are actually displayed. I purposely ordered things in a way to display the majority of the Heiji-and-Conan covers—5 out of the 7 that I own. I'm love them.)

They,,, kimss,, holde handss,,,,: I used to be like, "I don't really ship them; I just like their relationship!" And got, "Sure, Jan" in response.

But heck with it—while it's never, ever my intention to undervalue platonic bonds, I do like romance, and I'm tired of being ashamed of it! Shinichi and Heiji should open up their own detective agency and also kiss and hold hands, yes.

Which can absolutely be platonic, too! I love them either way.

[jayflrt]

yeah, 60 credits!! i think i'll have around 50, so... close enough, but not enough for me to do a 13th year of school

i didn't have a phone until middle school so i could text my parents that i was on the bus safely (or i wouldn't've had one at all until high school), but both my parents are teachers and were up by 5:30/6 for work, and my dad drove me everyday, so i got to school at like. 6:45 and sat in a before school program, played games, etc. until 9:15 every school day from 1-6th grade

now that i only have one class a day, i am as heavy a sleeper as you can get LMAOOO like. i am a rock.

i spent... like $150 on the game? couple bp, couple welkins, and $100 genesis crystals to get my ganyu (and all the extra primos went into my kazuha fund since ganyu was guaranteed)

i didn't even have sucrose until recently, so i had no anemo battery and i have self-sufficient xiao. i've soloed all but like... 4 bosses w/ him? and i did half of them no dmg if i remember correctly

and omg yeah building takes so long, i say stick w/ ur main team and his current build until you have time and resin for him.

HELP YEAH IT WAS!! it was like,, book knowledge, literacy and grammar, and also just generally how nice you were. i think we had like a 50-100 person literate group and it felt like it was actually hogwarts because it was so active 😭😭😭

i started posting on quotev at 11. wattpad always scared me, so i stuck to quotev and ao3, but i've always been a good writer, and i think i still have like... drafts of my first AWFUL original pieces in my drive somewhere

maybe i will make a gc, idk LMAO i'm very bad at keeping in touch and i'd feel bad nkjdfsjdf

yeah i need sfw yong </3 honestly all of 127 in crazy underrepresented on tumblr (excluding hyuck and mark bc they're included in dream works) when it comes to sfw fics or reactions or anything.

i of course am Adding to the dreamzen supremacy w my mainly dream reactions and dream series on my sideblog 😭😭😭but i've written a 10k yong fic for a collab i was in which was so fun!!

AHHH TAEIL ANOTHER MEMBER I BARELY SEE FICS FOR ☹️💗 but that’s so cute !! son of apollo definitely suits him <33 and i get what you mean !! i did smthn similar for my nct series — mc for jaemin’s installment was jaehyun’s younger sister, and that was alluded to in other installments as well + many of the members appear in each other’s fics (ex. mark being in jaehyun and johnny’s installments as well as getting his own) 🤧

yeah, i like having ur series connected yk? like it feels so nice to write in that little nod that only the people who have read the other fics will get as like an easter egg! and it makes it feel more real <3 which is so fun and interactive

taeil not loved enough for being our vocal slayer. like those high notes y'all love? appreciate this man bc he's not gonna be slaying for us much longer he gotta go to the military😭😭

it is!!!! i appreciate any attention i get, especially if it's on my shitposts and stuff LMAOOO like it's nice that people care? and thinking abt the fact i have a following and stuff is so crazy. it's really nice to have people support your work!!!

i just wish there was like. a cheat code? to make longer fics more popular again bc they used to be POPPING when i joined kpop tumblr 2 years ago and now the attention span is gone 😭😭😭and long fics take so much more effort than reactions so getting a diminished response can be disheartening

omg you’re so close !!! 💖💖 i’m not sure how many units are allocated for each class where you are but that sounds like about 2-3 classes you need :o for me the units are distributed differently tho so it might be different for you !! but good luck, that must be so exciting 🥰 

HAHAHA YEAH SAME except it was for me walking to school and i had a flip phone 🤧 i enjoyed it a lot tho HAHAH i played my lil game of tetris over and over again and took pictures with my 144p camera <3 i started walking to school when i was in middle school bc i lived so close so that's why i got my phone :') and then we upgraded to a galaxy s1 and then an iphone for high school WOOOO (but man it's so weird to think i owned a galaxy s1 HAHAH beginning of an era??) 

omg you have one class a day?? that's so nice :o my monday classes are like that !! it's very relaxing but annoying that i have to go all the way to campus just for one class 🤧 i don't have a car either so i get in my daily cardio at least LMAOAO

omg i have not used the $100 for the top up crystals yet BUT it is very tempting especially with the bonus :'') i just wish the top up shop reset the bonus thing every banner or two ,, i feel like mihoyo would make so much more money doing so right ??? i just hope i get kazuha 🥰 

omg sucrose is sooo good and her ult is so pretty omg :'o i got c2 jean now so i feel like i should build her HAHHA but also i have her at lvl 80 and wanna focus on getting childe and raiden to 90 🤧 plus i wanna level up all of yanfei's talents :'') but yeah im focusing on my main team rn bc resin is so scarce 🏃‍♂️ 

that sounds so fun tho !! 💗 i can see how that transferred over to writing fics HAHAH but omfg i cringe looking at my old writing LOL like at least i tried ,, i can pat myself on the back for that :') but it's so funny looking back at how awkward my dialogue used to be and how 2d my characters felt. i also moved onto ao3 from wattpad but i feel like ao3 is kinda losing it's charm now ?? idk like before i felt like i could find so many gems and all the writing was top tier but now im seeing so much toxic romanticization and people writing smut for minors :// 

omg yeah i agree i think nctblr is geared toward the dreamies D; i mean i ult dream and also fall victim for writing more for the dreamies (mostly jaemin) HAHAH but i think 127 and wayv are neglected sometimes <//3 save for jaehyun and sometimes johnny, but i agree the other members (esp taeil!!!) deserve more fics 

yesyes i agree !! 💕 it's like a little special easter egg or cookie for the readers and i love seeing readers connecting the dots 🥰 plus i get emotionally attached to my characters so i wind up wanting to write more of them :] i love the little storyverses they're so cute <33

and omg yes :((( i remember long fics were a lot more popular around 2020 to early 2021??? idk what happened after that but ppl started shifting to shorter pieces like reactions/headcanons and smaus 🤧 i understand that it's easier to read but i personally think it's more rewarding to write your heart out for a long fic and receive love about it 💘 i think nctblr still appreciates a good longfic tho !! tbh they're more prominent in the fandoms that aren't enhablr LMAOAO