#this is all i have until the ts file is out

[min1check]

Leto! Joker x side chick! Reader ig…

1248 words

Barely proofread ts so i’m so sorry if u see errors

pt 2

Description: You work at one of Joker’s clubs and he starts to take an interest in you….

Every night there would be presents and money left on my small table in my small ass kitchen in this small ass apartment. 

It all started when I finally learned the real identity of my boss’s boss’s boss at the club I worked at. I really needed money desperately for my family who lived out of the country. I’m currently working on the papers so they can gain legal presence but until then I need to work hard and study hard. 

At the club I worked at, they paid me better than most places and I would be able to go to university in the daytime and work at night. 

The club was pretty high class, there were many high profile politicians who were VIPs. Given that they were even at a club, they were most if not all sleezebags who tried to hit on the staff to the point that I could file sexual harassment charges. But nevermind that. 

The club was so high class and full of VIPs that I didn’t expect it to be owned by the biggest crime lord in this city, the Joker. This whole city was corrupt in and out. Even if I tried to file those sexual harassment charges I would’ve been shut up instantly. 

When I saw this head of green hair and his pale deathly looking skin and his red lips that I couldn’t tell if it was lipstick or blood, I tried my best to not be noticed by him. 

Though he looked like a corpse he was extremely attractive. Maybe in another universe I would actually try to get at him. Well and if his fellow Clown Queen of Crime didn't exist. She frightens me even more than Joker. Well actually that’s a lie but as a girl I can say that we’re ruthless when it comes to boyfriends and husbands and such. Too blind and in too much love to use actual reason.

Harley’s beautiful though they genuinely look good together. 

I went over to Joker’s table where he was talking to (or more like taunting) his client to drop off the drinks. It seemed that everyone else already knew what his regular drink was and his client’s. 

I tried my best not to mess up or to not loudly drop the drinks because at this moment I could actually not stop my whole body from shaking. They continued talking about their deal without even looking at me. I kept a friendly smile on my face. 

I walked off a bit quickly because I was terrified. Yet I felt like someone was staring right at me. I quickly turned my head and all I could see in that moment was Joker with his usual devilishly grin looking straight at me. My blood ran cold. 

When I was out of his sight I closed my eyes and started to pray. 

‘Dear God, please forgive me for any sins I have committed for I do not want to die tonight. I have too much to live for so please don’t let me die. Thank you for everything you have blessed me with Lord, amen.’ 

I was crying internally. 

Literally was gonna kill myself right then and there. But I brought myself back to reality and back to work. 

Whenever I would come to work the Joker would be there with Harley. 

I literally think I’m going crazy because I think he keeps looking straight at me…. With his girlfriend/wife/partner in crime which was even worse. Yeah he was hot but cheating men are scum of the Earth. And Joker’s a mass murderer and other stuff. To be honest I kinda forgot I’ve been too busy with school to care about politics….

I finally got a shift off and a day off of school today. I’m just gonna sleep and lounge around and be fat. I got out of my bed to go get some more ice cream in my kitchen. 

It felt a bit unnerving when I was in the kitchen, like someone was watching me. I shook off the feeling because I had locks on every single window and door. The crime in my country is a bit bad so Gotham wasn’t that much different. 

As soon as I turned around to go back to my bedroom with my ice cream in hand…

“Boo!” 

“What the fuck?!” I screamed so loud that I dropped my bowl of ice cream and it shattered. 

“The look on your face doll… it’s so… funny!” The intruder was the Joker and he couldn’t and wouldn’t stop laughing at my reaction. 

“…” I just stood there in silence thinking about how that bowl was so expensive…

I didn’t want my floor to be sticky so I started picking up shards of the really expensive bowl. 

“Aww~ Are you.. mad doll~?” He teased me with his usual grin. 

“Not really, I’m just a little sad because this bowl was really expensive.” I sighed to myself. 

“If that’s it then here.” Joker tossed money at me. 

“Um… It’s okay I’ll just work for it back.” My mom always taught me that I shouldn’t accept money and that I should always offer to pay so I gave that money back to him. 

“Just take it Doll, think of it as my~ first~ gift~ to~ you~” he really emphasized on the last part like really. 

He got comfy and sat down on a table chair as I cleaned the floor from the sticky mess. 

That sounds a little wrong, I just mean my ice cream trust…

After cleaning it all, it occurred to me…

Why and how did the Joker get into my apartment…

My blood ran cold. I feel like I could turn into a reptile with how much my blood goes cold. 

“I liked seeing you at my club but I like seeing you in this shaggy apartment more.” He looked at me. 

“Um… how did you get in here?” I spoke quietly afraid I would somehow strike a nerve. 

“It was easy! I broke your window.” He spoke like he just finished climbing Mt. Everest. 

My mouth dropped to the floor. 

Like I tried to close it but it just wouldn't. 

“…” 

“What~? Cat got your tongue Doll?” He grinned. 

I’m actually going to kill myself. 

At this point I hope he pulls out the glock 19 and shoots me….

Wait but all my windows are barred up…

I looked into my living room and realized there was glass everywhere and the metal bar was stretched apart enough where it would fit the Joker perfectly. 

Calculating the cost in my head I actually started to cry. Tears ran down my face. 

I would be fine if I picked up a few extra shifts but I had to study more because finals were coming up. I’ll have to cut down on food and sleep…

The Joker awkwardly patted my back. 

“Here’s some more money Princess.” 

“I.. Cant accept it.” I said between sniffles and pushed his money back to him. 

He suddenly grabbed my head with both his hands and made me stare him in the eye. 

“Take. The. Money. Princess. Or else I’ll shove it down your throat.” His face was way too close to mine. 

“Thank you…” I tried my best to smile while he was still manhandling my head. 

He kissed me out of literally nowhere. 

My blood went cold again. 

I don’t want to be a mistress or some side bitch….

And Harley’s gonna kill me……

Yet it felt so good. 

[chaotic-iguana]

Hushed loving

lawfirm partner! joel x paralegal! reader

request by @suckerforfanfic : the reader and joel having a secret relationship based on i can see you by ts, which could include like little smutty scenes

wordcount: 1.1k

warnings: smut. sexy times, falling in love ish, power play, boss/employee relationship

a/n: thanks for answering my random law related qs @theywhowriteandknowthings vi ur the best 

masterlist

But what would you do if I went to touch you now?

What would you do if they never found us out?

What would you do if we never made a sound?

'Cause I can see you waitin' down the hall from me

And I could see you up against the wall with me

And what would you do, baby, if you only knew?

That I can see you

“Shhh honey, can’t let ‘em hear us,” a rough whisper came from behind you as a large hand clamped over your mouth, his other hand snaking around your waist to snap the band of your underwear against your skin, making you squirm. 

“So fuckin’ needy, aren’t you?” a soft coo into the back of your neck; a frantic swipe of his fist ripping the ruined underwear off of you. It takes all your focus to clear the haze in your mind and just nod desperately.  

“Almost think you like the thrill a’ gettin’ caught. Would you like that, baby? For everyone to know you’re being fucked by the boss?” The mere thought makes you moan and throw your head back into the warmth of his broad shoulder, a garbled yes tumbling from your lips. 

It had taken months for Joel to so much as look at you. The intern, the nobody who was lugged with every menial task no one else bothered to do. You’d been working at his firm for nearly half a year, when an extremely late night at the office had you accidentally falling asleep on your desk instead of finishing up the brief you needed to have at Joel’s desk by the next morning. He was the first one entering in the morning, and when he found you slumped over your desk with files scattered everywhere, he’d started yelling at you until he saw the exhausted tears in your eyes, the slump of your shoulders, and how uncombed your hair was. His piercing gaze had softened, hands smoothing over your shoulders as he tidied your desk up and put your computer in your bag before he turned to you with a familiar scowl and told you to get the hell out before you tank anything else, sweetheart. 

He looked at you more often after that. Thanked you for the coffees his colleagues forced you to get as a cruel joke. Two weeks later, he recruited you in a permanent paralegal position, claiming he was impressed by your work for him so far. It had taken a few drinks and yet another late night for him to pin you with a dark stare, a rosy flush spreading down his cheeks and chest.

And now, months after that, here you were. At his mercy in an empty conference room while literally every single one of your colleagues were in the bullpen right outside. You were so sure everyone knew by now - it was practically obvious. Both of you always left the office within twenty minutes of each other, his so-called lectures to you had way less bite than before - he even called you sweetheart during one and your heart nearly leapt out of your chest until you realised everyone else took it as condescension - and oh, god the looks. Joel was always looking at you now. From across the room, from the other side of the glass pane of his office, in meetings, in hallways. In all honesty, you weren’t much better. A frenzied need for him overtook your mind at all times, rendering you entirely mindless beyond him. 

His rough hands groped the inside of your thighs, nudging you to spread your legs as he leaned back into the table behind him, settling you on his thigh. The palm clamped on your jaw moved down to curl around your neck, cutting off the whimper that escaped you while his thumb grazed your folds, an arm hooking under your thigh to hold you to him as your hips bucked. Two fingers inched into you, making your breath hitch as Joel curled them slightly and began pumping them rapidly. 

“Lookin’ so goddamn pretty in this skirt. Had to show you my appreciation, sweetheart. Fuckin’ love ruining you at work.” Another muted moan, your nails biting into his forearms as you let out a high-pitched whine at his words. You could feel the knot in your stomach tightening, your thighs beginning to shake at the onslaught and Joel picked up on it immediately. 

“Shit-fuck are you about’a come? Already?” At your nod, he huffed and sped up his fingers, angling them so his thumb was circling your clit furiously. “Think you’ve earned it? Botched a fuckin’ meeting with a client thanks to you. Maybe I shouldn’t let you come until we get home. Leave you high and dry, hm?” 

Your eyes went wide and before you knew it, you were pleading him. “N-no, Joel, please. Need to come, need it-“ His scoff cut you off, movements getting more brutal; more honed to the spots Joel knew made you see stars. 

“Need it?” The mocking words made you shut your eyes in embarrassment before Joel continued rasping into your shoulder from behind. Another mumbled please had him flat out laughing at you. 

“Well, I gotta give my girl what she needs, don’t I?” and with that, you were coming, hard. Trembling in his arms, you clenched around his fingers hard enough for him to choke on his breath as he muttered praises into your hair, working you through the high before you went limp in his arms. 

Hands that had groped, spread, and bruised you began gently fixing your skirt while pocketing your ripped panties, smoothing out the wrinkles in your clothes before he looked down at you with a glint in his eye. 

“Prep the paperwork for Johnson’s case. Get it done by tonight, and I’ll make you some chicken alfredo when you get home.” He dipped to peck your lips once, lightly - as if he was choosing this moment to be bashful - before slipping out of the room. 

His footsteps were interrupted by the sharp, irritating voice of his colleague - the one whose client you were supposed to have spoken to twenty minutes ago, which in your defense is what you stepped into the conference to do before Joel found you - a man who found every opportunity to point out flaws in your work. And you were about to give him a smoking gun. 

“Hey Joel, where’s your favorite paralegal? I’ve been looking for her for the past thirty minutes and I can’t seem to find her anywhere. Some kid said he saw her go into that conference room you just came out of. She still in there?”  

There was a pause of silence, and you could hear the sheer panic in Joel’s voice when he finally spoke. 

“Uh, I don’t have a f-favorite paralegal. And if she’s in there I definitely didn’t see her. She must have gone in and come out a long time ago. Because why would we both be in the same room for so long, right?” 

His rushed, shitty explanation made it so fucking obvious what was going on - as if the many, many sounds slipping from the crappily sound-proofed room didn’t. 

So much for keeping it quiet. 

hello loves, as always - thank you for reading. comment your thoughts or find me on ao3. stay hydrated and have a great day! taglist (message me if you want to be taken off): @imherefordeanandbones  @theywhowriteandknowthings , @josephquinnswhore ,@millerscoffee , @nostalxgic , @sscorpiiiio, @pedrosaidsheispunk, @its-nebuleuse , @sofiparallel , @mandoisapunk , @bastardmandennis , @evyiione , @breakfastatjoels dividers by @reveriesources

[beethovenus]

Is it weird I've just grown uncomfortable with Undertale's murderous route being collectively referred to as the "Genocide" route -- given the very real ongoing genocides taking place for the world to see?

I'm not trying to take digs at people using the term "Genocide route," nor claim that using the term is trivializing the struggles of real people -- but I just think that, by now, there's a lot of better names that can be used to describe it.

For one, while Undertale doesn't have official route names, it does refer to the route as "murder" in the game files. There's also naming easter eggs for "Murder" and "Mercy," which give the response "That's a little on-the-nose, isn't it...?" With these two combined, it's entirely plausible that if there were official names, they could be "Mercy" (kill nobody) and "Murder" (kill everybody.)

Going off of this, there's a bunch of different names you can use:

Murder Route (simple, concise.)

Murderous Route (a little more flair!)

No Mercy Route (simple and concise, but problem: there's a Neutral ending with this name, where all encountered monsters are killed.)

Merciless Route (a little more flair, doesn't conflict with the former.)

Furthermore, there's names that other Undertale fangames use for their own "kill everyone" routes (albeit to better distinguish these routes from the original game's, and what you do in them.)

While these route names are more based on the contexts of their own routes' stories and content, they can be applied to Undertale pretty well!

TS!UNDERSWAP uses "Ruthless Route." I came up with this! It was originally an idea I had to replace Undertale's "Genocide Route" name, in a hypothetical "if I could have chosen the community-given route names" exercise. It's meant to best describe your actions: being utterly Ruthless, going out of your way to do things you shouldn't be -- and in the context of TS!UNDERSWAP itself, doing things worse than just killing.

"Eradication Route" is also something I've seen people use, given the route's journal status for eradicated monsters.

DELTATRAVELER uses "Obliteration Route." It's pretty to the point, and works really well with how Undertale's route isn't just about killing everyone, but draining the world of everything that makes it special -- until at the end, you obliterate everything.

Personally, I'm probably going to end up going with "Murder Route" due to its simplicity and in-game references. Let me know what you think!

[intercoursefluids]

BMFBMLBME Chapter 19

Chloe sat in the school library, waiting for Max to join her.

His text had seemed urgent and yet he was taking forever to get there.

Chloe pulled out her nail file, ready to keep herself occupied until he arrived when he rushed in.

Max looked around the room, clutching a folder to his chest as he searched for her.

Chloe waved her arm, snagging his attention and watching him rush over to her.

“Follow me.” He hissed, going straight past er and to a much more secluded corner of the library.

Chloe blinked, slowly gathering her belongings and following after him.

“What’s with the secrecy?” She asked, glancing around them as Max fumbled with the folder.

“This is much worse than we thought.” He said, handing the folder over to her.

Chloe opened it, taking in the various news articles and photos piled in it.

“I think that, yes, Lila is a meta, but she might also be a serial killer.” He hissed, spreading out the papers in front of Chloe.

Chloe paused, looking around to make sure no one heard him.

“I don’t like her either but lets not go that far-”

“I’m being serious!” He said, cutting her off.

“Look, all of these people. They are all dead, they were all ruled as suicides but what if they weren’t?” He whispered, shoving a list of names towards her.

“I looked into all of them, they were very involved in their schools and clubs and had tons of friends. Lila moves in and everyone turns against them, they start being bullied and are miserable. Eventually, every single one of them took their own life.”

“Most of it makes sense, but some of it just doesn’t add up. It’s not enough to raise suspicion, but if Lila is a meta, which I’m 98.56% sure she is… Then it makes this whole thing much worse.”

Chloe looked at the list, reading the descriptions of the people and their situations.

The similarities between the victims and Marinette made her feel sick.

“She was after Marinette.” Chloe whispered, looking up Max with a grave expression.

He nodded, glancing up as a group of giggling students walked in. He shuffled everything together, shoving it all back into a folder and into his backpack before they could get any closer.

“By definition, a serial killer is someone who commits a series of murders, often with no apparent motive and typically following a characteristic, predictable behaviour pattern. We have her pattern. She goes after people like Marinette, happy and well loved, and then she turns everyone against them.” Max explained, glancing around nervously.

“But we can’t prove she killed them; they were ruled as suicides.” Chloe reminded him.

“If she used her abilities,” he said, leaning towards her. “-who’s to say she couldn’t have, assisted in their deaths? Told them what to do and step back, staying far from the trouble while they did it.”

Chloe pressed her lips together, crossing her arms as she leaned back in her chair.

They needed to go to the police; if they were right, Lila was dangerous, and not just a petty teenager abusing her abilities dangerous.

And since her apparent target was now missing, who’s to say she wouldn’t pick someone else now?

“How strong is our case?” She asked.

“Not nearly strong enough.” Max said, leaning towards her with a slight glint in his eye. “But I think I know how to fix that.”

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[narastories]

20 questions for fic writers!

Thank you @septemberskye for tagging me <3

I'll tag @nijinskys @viole-n-ts @brotherhoodoftheblade and anyone who would like to do this.

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 98! (The same formatting thing happened to me too lmao) I can't believe it's almost 100. It's especially fun because it's Yuletide season and the fic authors won't get revealed until January. Which means it will probably be impossible to tell exactly which one counts as my 100th fic and somehow I like that.

2. What's your total AO3 word count? For a second I thought I would have to add it up manually. Phew. It's 457,682.

3. What fandoms do you write for? The Fetch Phillips Archives, The Dresden Files, and the Lord John Series (Outlander). Sometimes a fic here and there for other fandoms.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? the hero's prize, A bed and a penny, whatever this may be, over the edge and out of sight, Love your enemy The popularity of a fandom or a ship + the age of the fic will always have a bigger impact on your statistics than the quality of your writing. Don't swear it too much.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes, almost always. I found many friends this way.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Probably "so cold". A short ficlet but it hurt lol

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?  I usually write happy endings so I can't choose ^^"

8. Do you get hate on fics? Luckily I wouldn't say I do. I've gotten some annoying grammar corrections, and deliberate misunderstandings about a ship, but nothing I would call outright hate in the comments. Oh, and there was that one guy who got their panties in a twist because I've written a male character as a witch. That was fun.

The silver lining in writing for small fandoms, rarepairs, and niche topics is that you don't get many eyes on you so you just statistically catch fewer dumbasses. But if you are getting hate, just remember: don't feed the troll. Eat the troll ;)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes, I write all kinds of smut. Usually, my kind of smut is: - There is extensive set-up. I like to set the mood first, so unless it's a very short fic, there isn't any smut in the first 30% I would say. Even if I consider it a PWP there is usually some kind of set-up. - There are usually feelings involved. I like to focus on that, even if it's just a hook-up. - It's usually kinky. Not always, but I do write a lot of ships with inherent power dynamics or morally grey characters. And I'm happy to go all out there with the kinkyness lol

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? No. It's not my thing. But never say never because I actually have one idea for a fun little crossover...

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? OMG yes! Three of my ficlets from the Harry/Nic OTP challenge got translated to Russian and I'm so honored <3

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?  No... that idea gives me anxiety....

14. What's your all-time favorite ship? I can't answer this either. There are just too many ships that are too close to my heart. Especially since there are several rarepairs where I published either the first or most of the fics on AO3 for that ship... I simply can't choose.

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I have one unfinished WIP on AO3, "over the edge and out of sight" which I know I will never continue (but I don't even want to so I don't think it counts as an answer). After that, I've stopped putting WIPs on AO3 in general ^^" From my WIP folder, there are several that I would love to finish, but I don't think I will: - I started a translation of my super old BJR/OC (Outlander) fic but I had a really hard time getting over the embarrassment of reading my old fic - I have a few snippets of a continuation for the J/J/J series (Outlander) and it would be very fun but I'm not sure if I'll ever be in the mood to finish it - I also started a modern Enjou/Aether fic (Genshin Impact) that would be super cute but it's probably too much work compared to my investment in that fandom

16. What are your writing strengths? POV. I think I'm good at showing the POV character's personality. And I sink my teeth into that deep POV and don't let go. You won't catch me slipping into a different POV in the next paragraph, and I'm sort of proud of that.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Plot? lmao It's complicated for me. I can't come up with an intricate plot before I start writing. I need to start writing and then halfway through move the puzzle pieces around. It's difficult for me to wrap my head around it. I also think that sometimes I get so focused on setting something up that I don't realize that the reader might think I'm setting something else up if that makes sense. That's definitely an area I could improve on.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? I don't like it. I'm fluent in 3 languages and I've written fic in 2. But I don't like writing or reading dialogue in another language in a fic because I think it disrupts the flow of reading. For me, it's less about the fear of making a mistake in a language that isn't my native tongue (because this one isn't, for example, lol) and it's more about worrying that it won't be enjoyable for someone who doesn't speak that language. Even if you provide translations it's just a lot of effort to scroll back and forth.

A word here and there is fine for me, or if you can cleverly convey language barriers by adding a few sentences. But otherwise, I would just rather write what language they are supposed to be speaking in.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Uh I think HP, back in high school. But that just shows my age lol

20. Favorite fic you've ever written? That is so difficult to answer. It's either "put my heart in your pocket" or "moral compass for hire".

[epicmusic42]

WIP Game

Okay so I've seen this around a few times, where you're supposed to list all the stories in your WIP folder and followers can ask about them/request snippets. And it did get me curious how ridiculous my list is because uh... I work on many stories simultaneously. And it's a WIP until it's finished or I decide I'm not writing it.

So yeah. Folks can ask about anything they want. I do not promise you will get an answer since I also included the count of [Redacted] WIP files I've got.

Everything is organized by Fandom and if I have multiple wips for a series, then the series has a subheader. Things in [brackets] are more commentary than wip, but I felt should be acknowledged when counting.

Arda

Crown of mikhil

Prompt notes

Untitled 1

CritRole

Time Fuckery

Modernish AU

Mirror Images?

Two Steps Forward, Nein Steps Back

The Brunch Club

Flashbacks

The Brunch Club backstorys

Mechs AU

Murderplay blumentrio 

Untitled 2

DC

My Wish for You

Not my sister, my uncle 

Agent A

I'm calling Martha

Ot4 but Crack

Untitled 3

Mechs

Breaking Marius's curse

The Terror: God of grieving, living out of spite, and the trapped

Going from Yes, to I love you

Pangolin Brian 

Time loop

Brian is Arthur 40k fiction go

Ocean Pirate AU

On Recovery When You're Immortal 

Te amo

This is new

Next Steps

Untitled 4

I Said I'm Keeping You 

Lyf/Raph

Not Quite Human

[Loose Change]

Promise You'll Keep Me, Even If I'm Real

Quick Thots 

TS/Brian

TS/Jonny

Ts/Jonny end

Ts/marius

Ts/marius/Jonny

Ts/tim

Smut

Ashes/Aurora 

Jonny gangbang

Marius/Jonny cannibalism 

Superhero Stuff

@fracnkie 's Outsider Pov

The Inherent Eroticism of…

Asking for what you want

Welcoming a new crew member

Ivy

Marius

[Concatenated]

Urban Magic

Eyot Cemetery 

Sexy Ghoul Feeding Time

[Like five docs on Ghoul language]

Star Wars

Ka'ra the Gota

Copikla 

Friends

Loose Change 

More Dead than kaysh thought

Prologue?

Sexytimes

Untitled 5

Mir'j'ade

Advice

Comfort 

Consent?

Discussions

Interview

Obi-wan Kenobi of aliit Kryze 

Obi-wan Kenobi of Clan Kryze

Xai giiyha'ah anohrahak uu ehnoctel

[Also like 7 notes docs]

Tra'kem'ad

Goran joha

Tra'kem'ad

Translations

Jesara, celo kat fohl

Ke'nuhoy, ner ad'ika 

Mando'a I see fire

sa sarad cuyir gotal de pitat

Tal jabat te laamtorun (Blood upon the risers)

Werdlaar

Follow up

Jesara celo kat fohl, juve e paihenelru foh keelak

Misc

Tamah qa brok vaversi

"I've been yours"

Alpha means buir

And I say

Bat Concordia 

Dom/sub thing

Ehnap im Lunetana'unru'yth; Rumar'eyir nu Ru'hiib'manir

Jatinobi

Jensaarai

Jetii ori'vod 

Ka'ra'ade 

Kar'ta beskare

Mattress red

Melida/Daan

Merged world's

Mission: babysitter wanted

Paden'hibir

Protest snippet 

Rex fucked up

Rex/sabe

Staging a couple

Stewjoni witch

T'ad runise

Time travel dooku

Time travel maul/Obi-wan 

Time8

To be naasade

To: a connection 

Untitled 6

Untitled 7

Xanatos/Jango?

Xarehk paiochl Rakadaiji

TMA

PA

Brain wtf?

Jonny dville and Jon Sims same guy

Other

Genderfluid?

Marvel-Dimension Travel

Sire, if I may?

Prompt Bucket

Original Work

Space Beowulf

Satan & Jesus go to pride

Cyberpunk persephone 

The Adventures of the Wise Old Wizard

Novel

This is my idea of a pandemic

Generic Prompt Bucket

Loose Change (technically not a WIP)

Redacted

Redacted A

Redacted 1

Redacted 2

Redacted B

Redacted 3

Redacted 4

Redacted 5

Redacted 6

Redacted 7

Redacted 8

Redacted 9

Redacted 10

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If you read this far, I'll do you the favour of informing you that there are 133 WIPs.

No, I'm not actively working on all of them. But these are all projects that I haven't removed to a "fics I'll never write" or equivalent folder.

[purple-babygirl]

Bucky’s little is obsessed with him tickling her ❤️

Pairing: Daddy!Bucky Barnes x little!f!reader

Warnings: ddlg dynamics, fluff turned smut, oral (f receiving), fingering (f receiving), nsfw content, 18+ content.

Word count: 1,720

A/N: this has been in my WIPs for like at least 3 months because i suck like that. Nonnie, if you're still here, i love you and never meant to make you feel ignored i apologize:"💜. Please enjoy xx

~~~

tickle time

She loved so much about being Bucky’s little, one thing being the privilege to be tickled by his long, fast fingers at any given moment. She was obsessed with the way his nimble digits stroked over her sides, spreading goosebumps throughout her body as her delighted screams reached the ceiling.

And Bucky would never miss a chance to be the cause of her uncontrollable giggling.

“Tickle time!” She announced out loud before plopping herself on Bucky's lap.

He let out a dramatic “ouff”, making her chuckle cutely, before his fingers put down the book they were holding, and with a sly smile on his face, found her sides to tickle her.

Barely a minute in and she was laughing, screaming and thrashing; begging to get away even though she'd asked for it.

Bucky wouldn't let her though. He carefully slid her off his lap and on the couch, got on top and started tickling her harder, burying his smiley face in her neck, his slightly chapped lips tickling the soft skin there, “where do you think you're going?”

His metal fingers glided with ease as they stroked her over the thin material of his shirt. Her head was thrown back and her legs involuntarily kicked as she squealed, “dada!”

~

Whatever the time or place, she was ready to get tickled till she’d lost her breath and Bucky was always more than happy to give her just that.

“Tickle time!” Bucky heard her giggle before he felt her wrap her arms around his waist from behind.

He grinned silently, setting the spoons he was tossing the salad with down. He wiped his hands on the towel slowly, knowing she was waiting.

“Dada, it's tickle ti-” Her own startled shriek cut her off when Bucky turned and in the blink of an eye she was in the air and tossed over his shoulder.

She squealed and swung her legs lightly as he carried her to the bedroom, laid her down to tickle her and pulled the loudest laughs from her chest.

“Oh, no, where do you think you're going?” Bucky laughed and pulled her back to him by the ankle when she tried crawling away to avoid his torturous, determined ministrations.

“Dada!” She screamed out yet another laugh, her smaller hands trying to push his big ones away from her sides. Her cheeks hurt from laughing so much.

Her shirt has ridden up from all the squirming and Bucky immediately put his mouth on the showing skin, gently biting at her tummy, his fingers never stopping as she giggled louder and writhed harder.

Bucky’s lips then sucked on her flesh before letting go, making her blush and giggle at the sound. He liked the reaction too much not to repeat it.

“How’s that feel, doll?” Bucky wondered, pecking her belly button.

“Feels tickly. Tingles everywhere,” she panted, giggling again when Bucky nuzzled her tummy and nibbled on her flesh.

“I’ll take that,” he mumbled and the vibrations from his lips tickled her more.

~

It was like that almost every day, sometimes more than once in the same day and Bucky cherished those happy, sweet moments with her more than anything.

“Dada, what time is it?” She asked as she stood by the door to Bucky's office.

“It's almost two, dol—”

“'Ts tickle time!” She ran inside, putting her arms in the air.

“That’s like the third time today.” Bucky smirked as he lifted her up to seat her on his desk.

“It's tickle time, daddy. I don't make the clock.” She shrugged seriously, making Bucky laugh aloud before laying herself down on his desk and letting out a quiet giggle in anticipation.

Bucky calmly put his papers back inside the clear file, before he stood up and planted his hands on either side of her, caging her between him and his desk.

“What am I gonna do with you?” He shook his head, his stare was slightly different and it had her cheeks warming up.

“Dada,” she whispered bashfully as Bucky leaned forward.

“Shh, doll, it's tickle time,” Bucky confirmed in her ear before pecking it.

He slid his hands under her shirt, holding her sides and she shuddered in expectation.

She was so soft and so beautiful and all his.

She felt Bucky slowly blow hot air on the side of her neck. She let out a small giggle, her head leaning towards her shoulder to hide from Bucky's tickling breath. He softly blew down the column of her neck again and she giggled louder, jerking away.

Bucky chuckled, pressing a kiss to her warm skin and started lightly sucking on the spot behind her ear.

A different type of goosebumps pricked her skin, but Bucky’s fingers gave her no time to react as they began their sweet, languid torture on her sides.

Feeling both the metal and flesh directly on her skin along with Bucky’s lips on the sensitive spot behind her ear, she couldn’t stop the moans bubbling out of her chest with her giggles.

“Dada,” she sighed when Bucky’s fingers slowed down their movements, her small hands clutching the end of Bucky’s desk.

“What is it, doll?” Bucky questioned teasingly against her neck before bringing his face to hers and pecking her lips.

“I feel tingly.” Her breathless, low, timid admission made Bucky smirk as he bit down, her body already putty in his hands.

“Here?” he asked, squeezing her sides where he’s been tickling.

She shook her head shyly.

“Here?” Bucky’s lips brushed against her ear.

She shook her head again, her eyes shutting as Bucky’s hands inched further up under her shirt.

“Here?” He peppered kisses up and down her neck.

“No.” shook her head, her breath picking up as Bucky’s right hand squeezed a boob.

“Where then?” Bucky hummed, his thumb rubbing over her hardening nipple.

“Dada,” she whined, her clutch moving from the desk to Bucky’s muscly arms.

“You’ve gotta tell me where, doll. Or otherwise I won’t be able to make the tingles stop.” Bucky pecked the side of her mouth teasingly.

She took his metal hand out from under her shirt, the other still playing with her nub, and pressed his open palm between her legs, right on her mound, “here.”

She could hardly hear her own voice, but Bucky did. He’d heard her clearly and his satisfied grin was proof.

“You want daddy’s help, doll?” he dragged it out while he had her exactly where he wanted her, the tips of his fingers mischievously caressing her covered core.

She was already wet and he could feel her, hot and slick behind the thin panty.

“Yes, please, dada.” She swallowed, awaiting Bucky’s relieving touches.

“You got it, baby.” Bucky pecked her lips one more time before taking off her underwear.

“Let's see.” He gently pulled her lips apart using his thumbs to 'take a close look'. Her tight hole closed around nothing and Bucky felt his cock strain in his pants.

He let out an actual moan at the sight of her bare, open core, all wet and glistening and needy for him.

“You feelin’ tingly here, doll?” Bucky pressed his thumb to her button, rubbing lazy circles over the tiny bud.

“Y-Yes, dada. Please.” She breathed, her eyes watching her Daddy’s every move as he brought his face closer to her pussy.

“I can fix that,” Bucky whispered, his warm breath sending tickles up her spine and she opened her legs more, biting her lower lip.

Bucky pressed his tongue to her entrance, slowly licking up her silky lips, groaning at her taste. Her head fell back on the desk as a mewl escaped her.

Her whines were uncontrollable the second Bucky got his lips around her throbbing clit. Her fingers were tangled in Bucky’s hair as she writhed a different kind of writhing because Daddy was giving her a different kind of tickle time filled with different tingles.

Bucky kept his mouth on her clit, his lips sucking on it while the tip of his tongue massaged it, making her moan and wiggle on his desk. She tasted so good and he couldn’t get enough, his tongue sliding down to her core to lick her sweet arousal.

“Dada, plea-ah you’re making it more tingly,” she moaned, tugging on Bucky’s hair, making him hiss.

“But I thought you liked being tickled, baby?” Bucky asked against her core, the vibrations from his lips making her eyes roll as her clit pulsed even harder.

“Please,” she whispered, her jaw going slack as she felt Bucky’s finger poke inside her pussy.

He slid it in up to the knuckle before curling it upwards and her back slightly bowed off the desk, “what about now?” Bucky teased, pushing another finger inside her, his teeth softly nibbling on her clit.

All she could do was beg, a string of pleads leaving her mouth. Her fingers tugged harder on Bucky’s strands as she succumbed to the pleasure. The spot Daddy kept poking at inside of her made her feel the evil, yet delicious tingles everywhere from the back of her neck to her cunt. Even her toes were tensing with her abdomen.

The tip of Bucky’s tongue found the head of her clit, swelling and peaking from underneath the hood and kept flicking it again and again until her thighs were closing around his head and her fingers were pulling hard at his hair.

“Daddy.” One broken moan and she was gone, stars exploding behind her eyelids as their fire burned inside her.

Her pussy wildly contracted around Bucky’s relentless fingers as her back fully arched off the desk.

The pleasure was too good, the tingles too much and she screamed, her legs wrapping around Bucky’s head and trembling.

Bucky let her clit go, pressing soft kisses to the sensitive nub as his fingers slowly slipped out of her pulsing center.

Her back was on the desk again and she was panting. She closed her legs shyly, pressing her thighs together, her clit still throbbing.

She was already looking fucked out but Bucky wasn’t having it.

“Where do you think you're going? Now it’s time to fix daddy’s tingles,” Bucky said, one hand palming the bulge in his pants as the other stroked up her shin, “open those legs wide for me, doll.”

~~ Tags: @harrysthiccthighss @tinystudentfirepurse @lavendercitizen @tumblin-theworldaway @pretty-pop-princess-hs

[shorkbrian]

If you are still taking requests, I love me some fucky villian noncon. What about Dabi or Shigaraki kidnapping a hero’s gf/wife and sending the hero a tape of their fun playtime together.

you said Dabi or Shigs but like...

Why not both?

It’ll be a handful (by handful I mean 20-30 files) of short clips, nothing too long.

Shigaraki holding the camera while Dabi makes you sit on his face, stapled hands clamped on your thighs and forcing you to ride his mouth. Dabi thinks it’s cute how whiny and trembly and weak you are, begging to lay down or have a break. If your hands weren’t tied with a cute pink ribbon and fastened to the headboard, you’d be pulling at Dabi’s hair, trying to get his tongue away from your throbbing, puffy little overworked hole.

You can’t hold yourself up! Collapsing forward puts you embarrassingly close to Dabi’s naked cock, but you’re so tired and shaky that it’s impossible to do anything but pant all hot nd wet against Dabi’s stomach. The scarred man mumbles something about how he could cum just like that, with you breathin towards his cock, but all you feel is the movement of lips and the vibration of words and you’re gone.

The sound of Shigaraki fisting his cock is clear over the snickering and derogatory commentary he’s offering, zooming in on the tongue working between your legs as you shake and cry. He sounds so pleased and proud, a cute little hero wife getting soiled and ravaged by two nasty villains. You’ll never be the same, you’re dirty now. 

The next clip is of Shigaraki fucking you, your legs tied to a spreader bar. Greasy white hair swings back and forth over your face as the man grunts, fucking into you with quick fast strokes. He has to keep pulling out to work his cock through your folds to stop himself from cumming too soon. Plus, it’s fun to hear you squeak when the tip of his cock nudges against your clit.

They won’t give you the mercy of a gag to help you retain your dignity. No, all of your noises are heard, from when they’re hesitant to when they’re completely fucked out, sounding like you’re starring in a cheesy porn.

The videos that follow focus heavily on your body. 

Specifically, what your body looks likes with cum all over it.

How engorged and red your clit looks, cum seeping from your pussy and trickling down to your ass. Shigaraki holds your legs apart while Dabi uses one hand to spread your folds, the other hand working the camera. They want to show off how messy you get.

With cum all over your face, instructed to open your mouth and stick out your tongue, creamy, translucent threads webbing in your hair and across your cheeks, striping your nose and dripping off your eyelashes. 

Shigaraki likes rubbing all the cum into your skin, shooting his load onto your belly or your tits just so Dabi can film him massaging it until you’re sticky and gross all over. You complain and beg and reason, try to understand why they're doing this, but neither man cares about the words coming out of your mouth. It gets annoying after a while, so a couple of the clips show you getting your throat stuffed full of dick before the go back to Shigaraki gleefully putting his grimy little hands all over your body.

A lot of the clips are utterly humiliating, the boys forcing you into compromising positions.

Having you lay down on the bed and hold a wand to your own pussy with one hand while using the other to jack off Dabi’s cock into your open mouth. If the wand drops away, Dabi skull-fucks you, drool everywhere, lots of choking, pain, and tears. You make sure the wand stays firmly whirring against your skin, even after it hurts because you can’t stop gushing around it and your muscles are tired.

They fuck you up against windows, one of them filming your body getting rocked back and forth against the glass, tits squished, legs shaking as you get pounded to tears.

You get dressed in cutesy lingerie, but they’ve modified it, cut holes for your nipples and a little slit in your panties so they can slide their cock right up into your cunt like that's what you were made for.

But other times, you’re forced into a tight pair of stockings, forced to face the camera and clench your legs together so Dabi can fuck between your thighs, let the seam of your stockings rub against the top of his dick and subsequently, your cunt. Listen to you whimper and complain that you don’t want to do this until Dabi presses his cock to your hole through the stockings, seeing how far he can push the sheer fabric before it breaks and snaps against your cunt.

The last clip is the longest, more than two hours of footage.

It starts out in a dim room, shows you already stripped naked and on a bed with Shigaraki. You’re begging him, sitting on your heels in front of him as he holds your hands. You aren’t trying to pull your hands away, not towards yourself, but you’re trying to pull them towards his cock, and Shigaraki won’t let you.

It’s unclear whether they’ve drugged you or not.

The camera adjusts a bit, and then Dabi’s walking into the frame and towards the both of you. Immediately, your attention turns to him and his nudity, almost tripping over yourself as you tear away from Shigaraki to meet Dabi at the edge of the bed.

You’re almost crying, a hand dipping between your legs for you to hump against as you tearfully ask Dabi if you can ride him. If he’ll let you use his big cock so you can fuck yourself real good, until you feel all tingly and nice and fuzzy. Shigaraki’s being so mean, not letting you touch him!

Dabi laughs, catches your face in his hands and plan ts a kiss on your nose before saying yes. He barely gets himself situated on the bed before you’re pouncing on him, spreading your legs like a little breeding whore and sinking down on him with the sweetest look of ecstasy on your face - mouth open, eyes half rolled back into your head, cheeks flushed.

Shigaraki sits up so he can lean over and shove his hand up against where you’re fucking yourself on Dabi’s cock. The camera doesn’t really pick it up, but it’s clear by the way you jump and squeal and giggle that Shigaraki is doing something you like, moving his hand back and forth.

They start laying out the rest of their plans for the day, how it involves lazing around in bed and letting you fuck yourself dumb. Dabi even has Viagra in case you grow too insatiable.

At some point, they talk about how they're both going to fuck your pretty little cunt, and you cum right then and there, moaning high and girlish as your body looses itself.

It’s only four minutes into the video.

[iwaizumis-bitch]

dilf!osamu

warnings: suggestive content but no actual smut, coercion.

also guys this is part one of a two part thing so do not get your hopes up and think that there is actual smut in this part this is like the buildup

dilf!osamu who’s had no dating life since his divorce two years ago, too busy owning one of the biggest restaurants in the city and taking care of his four year old son.

dilf!osamu who’s head of kitchen hired you, he doesn’t even know you work there until you brush past him one day heading into the kitchen, mumbling a ‘sorry’, before hopping off to serve more dishes, your apron flying behind you.

dilf!osamu who checks the files for all the workers, curious only because he hadn’t seen you before, no other reason as he looks over your resume, keeping a mental note of your name.

dilf!osamu looking you up on social media, looking through all the posts of you happy with friends, a small grin on his face.

dilf!osamu checking your shifts, conveniently bumping into you when you walk out the door as you spilled water all over him, cheeks burning red as you apologised, not realising he owned the restaurant.

dilf!osamu telling you it’s fine, and asking you to follow him up the stairs behind the kitchen where you had never been, as he walks into the office with a shiny gold plaque saying ‘O. Miya’s Office’.

finally, silly you realised he was the boss.

‘i’m really s-sorry sir’, you stuttered, dripping wet.

he grabbed a towel from under his desk, folding his button up to his elbows as he walked towards you, wrapping the towel around you.

‘ts alright doll’, he muttered, taking a whiff of your hair. ‘you new here?’, he stepped back, crossing his arms.

‘yes sir’, you said quietly. he almost wanted to tell you that you didn’t have to call him that, but he didn’t.

he hummed, opening one of his drawers, retrieving a medium sized black shirt.

‘change’, he said, sitting back in his seat, manspreading, hands interlocked over his stomach

you gulped nervously. ‘is there a bathroom or somethi-’ you started, but were cut off.

‘here. change’, he ran his tongue along his teeth, raising his eyebrows at you.

‘yes sir’, you whispered, taking your apron off before turning around.

he watched as you grabbed the bottom of your shirt, going to pull it up.

‘turn around’, he demanded, tone full of authority.

your head whipped over your shoulder, eyes wide as you looked at him. ‘b-but sir’, you whispered, beyond embarrassed.

‘d’ya want a job or not sweetheart?’, he asked, smirking when you turned around slowly, cheeks red.

‘now, for the last time, change’, he said, blinking slowly as you nodded.

he savoured every moment, as you lifted your shirt over your head, revealing your bra-clad breasts. you fumbled with the black shirt, wanting to pull it over as soon as possible.

‘ah’, he said loudly, signalling you to stop. you watched as his eyes raked up and down your figure, arms coming to rest behind his head as he scoffed.

‘pretty’, he muttered before nodding, signalling for you to put the shirt on.

you quickly pulled it over your figure, arms subconsciously wrapping around your front.

he quickly got up, grabbing his blazer from behind his chair, putting it over your shoulders.

‘you’re coming home with me. now’, he said, eyes harshly looking into yours.

you submissively nodded, big doe eyes looking into his. you watched him quickly pack his things away, before grabbing your arm, taking you down the stairs and to the car park at the back

a/n ok so guys i was gonna make this long but i decided it will be like a 2 part thing because i dont wanna write the first part and it to get like no reach so if this gets like 250 notes ill write part 2

a/n2: guys my haikyuu posters came and i thought i was getting 2 but there were 2 in each box so i got four omg. anyways now i have a shoyo, suna, osamu and tsukishima poster :p 

[causeiwanttoandican]

Harry, Meghan and me: my truth as a royal reporter

I've covered elections and extremism, but nothing compares to the vitriol I've received since I started writing about the Sussexes

By Camilla Tominey, Associate Editor27 March 2021 • 6:00am

It is probably worth mentioning from the outset that I never, ever, planned to become a royal reporter. I mean, who does? It’s one of those ridiculous jobs most people fall into completely by accident.

I certainly wasn’t coveting the position when I first found out how bonkers the beat could be after covering Charles and Camilla’s wedding in 2005. Desperate for ‘a line’ on what went on at the reception, journalists were reduced to flagging down passing cars in Windsor High Street and interrogating the likes of Stephen Fry about whether they’d had the salmon or the chicken.

Watergate, this wasn’t.

Yet when my former editor called me into his office shortly afterwards and offered me the royal job ‘because you’re called Camilla and you dress nicely’, who was I to refuse?

Having planned to get married myself that summer, and start a family soon afterwards, I looked to the likes of Jennie Bond and Penny Junor and figured it would be a good patch for a working mother as well as being one I could grow old with. Unlike show business, when celebrities are ‘in’ one minute and ‘out’ the next, the royals would stay the same, making it easier to build – and keep – contacts.

So if you’d told me that 16 years later, I would find myself at the centre of a media storm over a royal interview with Oprah Winfrey, I’d have probably laughed in your face. First of all, only royals like Fergie do interviews with Oprah. And since when did journalists become the story?

Yet as I have experienced since the arrival of Meghan Markle on the royal scene in 2016 – a move that roughly coincided with Twitter doubling its 140-character limitation to 280 – royal reporters like me now find themselves in the line of fire like never before.

We are used to the likes of Kate Adie coming under attack in the Middle East, but now it is the correspondents who write up events like Trooping the Colour and the Royal Windsor Horse Show having to take cover from the keyboard warriors supposedly defending the Duke and Duchess of Sussex’s ‘truth’.

Accusations of racism have long been levelled against anyone who has dared to write less than undiluted praise of Harry and Meghan. But even I have been taken aback by the vitriol on social media in the wake of the couple’s televised two-hour talk-a-thon, in which they branded both the Royal family and the British press racist while complaining about their ‘almost unsurvivable’ multimillionaire lives at the hands of the evil monarchy. And all while the rest of the UK were losing their loved ones and livelihoods in a global pandemic.

Having covered Brexit, general elections and stories about Islamic extremism, I’ve grown used to being sprayed with viral vomit on a fairly regular basis, but when you’ve got complete strangers trolling your best friend’s Instagram feed by association? That’s Britney Spears levels of toxic.

Having a hind thicker than a rhino’s, it wasn’t the repeated references to my being ‘a total c—’ that particularly bothered me, nor even the suggestion that I should have my three children put up for adoption. At one point someone even said it would be a good idea for me to drink myself to death like my mother, about whose chronic alcoholism I have written extensively.

No, what really got me was the appalling spelling and grammar. I mean, if you’re going to hurl insults, at least have the decency to get my name right.

Yet in order to understand just how it has come to pass that so-called #SussexSquaders think nothing of branding all royal correspondents ‘white supremacists’ regardless of who they write for, or sending hate mail to our email addresses, offices – and in some cases, even our homes – it’s worth briefly going to back to when I first broke the story that Prince Harry was dating an American actor in the Sunday Express on 31 October 2016. Headlined: ‘Royal world exclusive: Harry’s secret romance with TV star’, the splash revealed how the popular prince was ‘secretly dating a stunning US actress, model and human rights campaigner’.

Despite my now apparently being on a par with the Ku Klux Klan for failing to acknowledge Meghan as the next messiah, it was actually not until the fifteenth paragraph of that original article that the ‘confident and intelligent’ Northwestern University graduate was described as ‘the daughter of an African-American mother and a father of Dutch and Irish descent’.

Call me superficial, but I was genuinely far more interested in the fact that Harry ‘I-come-with-baggage’ Wales was dating a former ‘briefcase girl’ from the US version of Deal or No Deal than the colour of her skin. A ginger prince punching well above his weight? This was the stuff of tabloid dreams. Little did I know then that covering the trials and tribulations of these two lovebirds would turn into such a nightmare.

The online hostility began bubbling up about eight days after that first story, when Harry’s then communications secretary Jason Knauf issued an ‘unprecedented’ statement accusing the media of ‘crossing a line’.

‘His girlfriend, Meghan Markle, has been subject to a wave of abuse and harassment’, it read, referencing a ‘smear on the front page of a national newspaper; the racial undertones of comment pieces; and the outright sexism and racism of social media trolls and web article comments’. Meghan’s mother, Doria Ragland, had apparently been besieged by photographers, while bribes had been offered to Meghan’s ex-boyfriend along with ‘the bombardment of nearly every friend, coworker, and loved one in her life’.

Suffice to say, I did feel a bit guilty. Although I hadn’t written anything remotely racist or sexist, I had started the ball rolling for headlines like the MailOnline’s ‘(Almost) straight outta Compton’ (referencing a song by hip-hop group NWA about gang violence and Meghan’s upbringing in the nearby LA district of Crenshaw), along with her ‘exotic’ DNA (which I subsequently called out, including on This Morning in the wake of ‘Megxit’ in January last year).

Omid Scobie, co-author of Finding Freedom, a highly favourable account of the Sussexes’ departure from the Royal family, written with their cooperation last summer, would later insist that the couple knew the story of their relationship was coming out and were well prepared for it.

I can tell you categorically that they weren’t, since I did not even put a call into Kensington Palace before we went to press for fear of it being leaked. (I did later discuss this with Harry, when I covered his trip to the Caribbean in November 2016, and to be fair he was pretty philosophical, agreeing it would have come out sooner or later. But that was before the former Army Captain decided to well and truly shoot the messenger, latterly telling journalists covering the newly-weds’ tax-payer-funded October 2018 tour of Australia and the south Pacific: ‘Thanks for coming, even though you weren’t invited.’)

The royal press pack is the group of dedicated writers who cover all the official engagements and tours on a rota system, in exchange for not bothering the royals as they go about their private business. It was a shame this ragtag bunch, of which I am an associate member, was never personally introduced to Meghan when the couple got engaged in November 2017.

I still have fond memories of a then Kate Middleton, upon her engagement to Prince William in November 2010, showing me her huge sapphire and diamond ring following a press conference at St James’s Palace with the words, ‘It was William’s mother’s so it is very special.’

I replied that she might want to consider buying ‘one of those expanding accordion style file holders’ to organise all her wedding paperwork. (Reader, I had given birth to my second child less than four months earlier and was still lactating.)

Not meeting Meghan did not stop royal commentators like me writing reams about her being ‘a breath of fresh air’ and telling practically every TV show I appeared on that she was the ‘best thing to have happened to the Royal Family in years’.

As the world followed the joyous news of the Windsors’ resident strip billiards star having finally found ‘the one’, the couple enjoyed overwhelmingly positive press culminating in their fairy-tale wedding in May 2018, which we headlined ‘So in love’ above a picture of the bride and groom kissing. I tweeted the wedding front page, along with the original story breaking the news of their relationship with the words, ‘Job done’. Yet, as Meghan would later point out in a glossy Santa Barbara garden, that was by far the end of the story.

According to the Duchess’s testimony before a global audience of millions, the seeds for their royal departure were actually sown by an article I wrote in November 2018 suggesting she made Kate cry during a bridesmaid’s dress fitting for Princess Charlotte.

Claiming the ‘reverse happened’, the former Suits star railed, ‘A few days before the wedding she was upset about something, pertaining to, yes, the issue was correct, about flower-girl dresses, and it made me cry, and it really hurt my feelings.’

She then went on to criticise the palace for failing to correct the story – suggesting that royal aides had hung her out to dry to protect the Duchess of Cambridge.

All of which left me in a bit of a sticky situation. As I told Phillip Schofield on This Morning the following day, ‘I don’t write things I don’t believe to be true and that haven’t been really well sourced.’

Having seemingly been completely bowled over by Meghan’s version of events, Schofe then went for the jugular: ‘I have to say, though, that’s all addressed in that interview, isn’t it, because she [Meghan] couldn’t understand why nobody stood up for her?’

Yet someone had stood up for her, on that very same This Morning sofa: me.

As I told Phil and Holly on 14 January 2019, as more reports of ‘Duchess Difficult’ started to emerge, ‘I think she [Meghan] is doing really well, she looks amazing, she speaks well. She has played a blinder.’

So you’ll forgive me if I can’t quite understand why Meghan didn’t feel the need to correct this supposedly glaring error once she had her own dedicated head of communications from March 2019 – or indeed when she ‘collaborated’ with Scobie, who concluded in his bestselling hagiography that ‘no one cried’?

Moreover, how did the Duchess know a postnatal Kate wasn’t ‘left in tears’? And if she doesn’t know, what hope has the average troll observing events through the prism of their own deep-rooted insecurities?

It appears the actual truth ceases to matter once sides have been taken in the unedifying Team Meghan versus Team Kate battle that has divided the internet.

Make no mistake, there are abject morons at both extremes spewing the sort of bile that, ironically, makes most of the media coverage of Harry and Meghan look like a 1970s edition of Jackie magazine.

It perhaps didn’t help my case that the day before the interview was aired in the US, I had written a lengthy piece carefully weighing up the evidence behind allegations of ‘outrageous bullying’ that had been levelled against Meghan during what proved to be a miserable 20 months in the Royal family for all concerned.

The messages – to my Twitter feed, my email, my website and official Facebook page – ranged from the threatening, to the typical tropes about media ‘scum’ and the downright bizarre. Some accused me of being in cahoots with Carole Middleton, with whom I have never interacted, unless you count a last-minute Party Pieces purchase in a desperate moment of poor parental planning.

Another frequent barb was questioning why the press wasn’t writing about that ‘pedo’ [sic] Prince Andrew instead – seemingly oblivious to the fact that no one would know about the Duke of York’s links to Jeffrey Epstein if it wasn’t for the acres of coverage devoted to the story by us royal hacks over recent years.

It didn’t matter that I had repeatedly torn the Queen’s second, and, some say, favourite son to pieces for everything from his propensity to take his golf clubs on foreign tours to that disastrous Newsnight interview.

Contrary to the ‘invisible contract’ Harry claims the palace has with the press, royal coverage works roughly like this: good royal deeds = good publicity. Bad royal deeds = bad publicity. We effectively act as a critical friend, working on behalf of a public that rightly expects the royals to take the work – but not themselves – seriously.

So when a royal couple preaches about climate change before taking four private jets in 11 days, it is par for the course for a royal scribe to point out the inconsistency of that message. None of it is ever personal, as evidenced by the fact that practically every member of the monarchy has come in for flak over the years.

If Oprah wasn’t willing to point out the discrepancies in Harry and Meghan’s testimony, surely it is beholden on royal reporters to question how the Duchess had managed to undertake four foreign holidays in the six months after her wedding, in addition to official tours to Italy, Canada, and Amsterdam, as well as embarking on a lengthy honeymoon, if she had ‘turned over’ her passport?

While no one would wish to undermine the extent of her mental health problems, could it really be true that she only left the house twice in four months when she managed to cram in 73 days’ worth of engagements, according to the Court Circular, in the 17 months between her wedding and the couple’s departure to Canada?

And what of the ‘racist’ headlines flashed up during the interview purporting to be from the British press, when more than a third were actually taken from independent blogs and the foreign media? The UK media abides by the Independent Press Standards Organisation’s Code of Conduct ‘to avoid prejudicial or pejorative reference to an individual’s race’, as well as by rigorous defamation laws. And rightly so – the British press doesn’t always get it right. But social media is the Wild West by comparison, publishing vile slurs on a daily basis with impunity.

Some therefore find it strange that such a litigious couple would claim to have been ‘silenced’ when they have made so many complaints, including resorting to legal action, over stories they claim not to have even read. There is something similarly contradictory about a couple accusing the tabloids of lacking self-reflection while refusing to take any blame at all – for anything.

In any normal world, informed writing on such matters would be classed as fair comment, but not, seemingly, on Twitter where those completely lacking any objectivity whatsoever are only too willing to virtue signal and manoeuvre.

As the trolling reached fever pitch in the aftermath of the interview, veteran royal reporter Robert Jobson of the Evening Standard called me. ‘Don’t respond to these freaks,’ he advised. ‘It’s getting nasty out there. Watch your back!’

Yet despite my general sense of bewilderment at the menacing Megbots, I can’t say it didn’t appal me to discover a close friend had received online abuse, purely by dint of being my mate. After discussing the lengths the troll must have gone to to track her down, she asked me, ‘Do you ever worry someone might do something awful to you?’ Er, not until now, no.

Of course it’s upsetting, even for a cynical old-timer like me. Worse still are people who actually know me casting aspersions on my profession on social media. Often these are the same charlatans who would think nothing of sidling up to me for the latest gossip on the Royal family, while publicly pretending that reading any such coverage is completely beneath them.

Most pernicious of all though – not least after Piers Morgan’s departure from Good Morning Britain following a complaint to ITV and Ofcom from the Duchess – is the corrosive effect this whole hullabaloo is having on freedom of speech. When you’ve got a former actor effectively editing a British breakfast show from an £11 million Montecito mansion, what next?

I cannot help but think we are in danger of setting race relations back 30 years if people are seriously suggesting that any criticism of Meghan is racially motivated. It’s the hypocrisy that gets me. When Priti Patel was accused of bullying, the very same people who willingly hung the Home Secretary out to dry are now the ones defending Meghan against such claims, saying they have been levelled at her simply because she is ‘a strong woman of colour’.

Of course journalists should take responsibility for everything they report and be held to account for it – but Harry and Meghan do not have a monopoly on the truth simply because the close friend and neighbour who interviewed them in return for £7 million from CBS took what they said as gospel.

If she isn’t willing to probe the disparity between Meghan saying someone questioned the colour of Archie’s skin when she was pregnant, and Harry suggesting it happened before they were even married, then someone must. There’s a name for such scrutiny. It’s called journalism.

The public reserves the right to make up its own mind – with the help of the watchful eye of a free and fair press. But that press can never be free or fair if journalists do not feel they can report without fear or favour. I’m lucky that a lot of the criticism I face is more than balanced out by hugely supportive members of the public and online community who either agree – or respect the right to disagree. Along with the hate mail, I have had many thoughtful and eloquent missives, including those that good naturedly challenge what I have written in the paper or said on TV, which have genuinely given me pause for thought.

I am more than happy to enter into constructive discourse with these correspondents, who are frankly sometimes the only people who keep me on Twitter. I mean, let’s face it, I wouldn’t be anywhere near the bloody thing if this wasn’t my day job.

With the National Union of Journalists this month declaring that harassment and abuse had ‘become normalised’ within the industry, never have members of Britain’s press needed more courage. As Winston Churchill famously said, ‘You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.’

Who would have thought that the preservation of the fundamental freedoms that we hold so dear should partially rest on the shoulders of those who follow around a 94-year-old woman and her family for a living?

If I’d known then what I know now, would I still have written the bridesmaid’s dress story?

Yes – doubtlessly reflecting sisterly sobs all round. But after two decades in this business, I am clear-eyed enough to know this for certain: whatever I had written, it would still have ended in tears.

[dramatical]

Hi!! I found myself in your tutorial tag (lovely gifs btw 💕!) and saw you use a variation of the video timeline/trimming method for your gifs and wondered if you posted a tutorial for that? Would love to see your method!! If that’s okay 😭💕

hey anon! i didn't post anything about that but it's super easy, let me show you.

first you have to have your video clip obviously, photoshop can open clips in these formats: .mp4, .mov, .avi, .ts (but only if they are encoded in h264).

if your video is .mkv (like most things film are if they are good quality) then you'll have to convert your clip to the formats i mentioned. I use avidemux when i have to do that, .mp4 is the easiest one.

okay with that out of the way, we're going to open things in photoshop. i'll be showing you with a clip in .mov i used to make gifs for my kpop blog:

we go file -> open and we search for our video file and then click on open it, we wait until photoshop loads it. Once it does you'll have your photoshop looking like this with your video loaded

in this part i usually move the red line to where i want my gif to start hit right click and click on set start of work area and to where i want it to end and do right click again and click on set end of work area or just simply dragging the thingys at the top of the timeline

i usually do this with long scenes so i don't have to trim a clip into several ones before opening photoshop, what i do is duplicate the canvas going image -> duplicate and do the same process but on a different timestamp

(note: this also works if you open screencaps going file -> open and clicking on one sceencap and then checking on the image sequence box, it'll open as if your sceencaps are a 'video')

duplicating the canvas will make your tabs look like this, it'll say copy and that's bc we're just editing the same thing in two different tabs

see, using the same video gif one is trimmed like this on the timeline

and gif two (from the same video) is trimmed like this on the timeline

okay, now scenes are picked and trimmed to where we want them. now we crop it to whatever we want it to be sized. if photoshop gives you a warning that it'll have to be converted to smart object to proceed you click yes on that!!

okay we have our smart object, but if you notice it's inside a folder called 'video group' drag it out of there and then you can just delete the folder so it doesn't bother

here i like to duplicate my smart object bc when i trim a white line shows in the borders and it bothers me, so i duplicate it going layer -> duplicate layer, and then select all layers and convert again to smart object.

now here is basically the same process with any gif tutorial, if you gif only using timeline you can sharpen and start coloring and then save, using a video here when working on timeline works very well bc more often than not it'll have the original timeframe already set.

if you work with frames, you'll have to do the whole process of flattening everything to frames after you sharpen and then do the coloring (or you can sharpen and color and convert everything to smart object and then flatten everything to frames)

i use an action for this bc i can't be assed to do everything manually, so i recommend having a sharpen process action ready to go

i hope this helped?

[kpopper]

How do you make your gifs? I really like the way you do it and would love to learn how

Hello nony! It really makes my heart warm that you like the way I gif, thank you so much! I'll make a detailed step by step of how I do things and give you the download links and other tutorials because learning it from scratch is usually a long process:

1. Vapoursynth

windows (if you have a x64 windows, I’d advise downloading the  VapourSynth64Portable(200616), I just tried that one and the folders look like the tutorial video, I’m not sure about the others.)

macOS

Tutorial:

You have these two icons on your desktop. You drag the file you want to gif on top of the one on the right, the one written vapourscript. It's going to pop up a window like this:

Then you write down when your footage starts, say, 00:00:07. Click enter and then you write down for how long it lasts, say, five seconds = 00:00:05. So when it starts > enter > for how long it lasts > enter. VS will do its own thing and you just have to wait until it pops out this window in your browser:

You can resize the footage however you like. 

(Photoshop dimensions:

1 column set: width of 540 px

2 column set: width of 268 px

3 column set: width of 177 px)

For denoise + sharpening I use this:

Just check out both and leave it like that. I hardly ever make either setting stronger than the minimum. If it is a TS file I also check out the qtgmc 30 fast on the Preprocessor option. If it is not a TS file and just a normal video, I don't click on it.

Then you copy everything from here

And you paste it on the other VS window that will pop out here:

I just ignore everything else. I have no idea what the coding actually says.

Now we go to:

2. Photoshop

download here *blows a kiss for @woodzm my fave lil hacker*

download from the torrent one,  you’ll need the file that already have all the parts. do not download the parts separately. 

Tutorial

After you open photoshop, click ctrl + O to open a file. This is the pathway to the folder where my files from vs are (pay attention to the top in case you need to go through your folders) (vs > vs > gifs > output)

The next steps will depend on what you like / how your original footage looks like. 

A) Blur > Gaussian Blur. Either 1,0 or 1,5. Set opacity to 30 - 40%

B) Sharpen > Smart sharpen. 

Red is fixed. Green you decide what you think looks better.

You can add A + B together or use one or the other. To know what will help requires practice, so gif a lot! 

Now this is a personal preference, I can’t gif in another way:

Convert Frames > Flatten frames into Clips.

Click on those three little squares on the bottom left, and then Make Frames From Layers from the same place you clicked to Convert Frames just a step prior. 

Delete the first frame and whatever else doesn’t fit the gif you’re making.

This is when I color, which is personal and it depends a lot on what I’m dealing with. If you want I can make a tutorial of tools I like later, but my advice is to find something that suits you. This is the most fun part!

Now the last touches are:

C) Select all frames and set their timing to 0,07. I always use this one, it’s neither rushed or slowed down.

Save it with ctrl + shift + alt + s (at the same time). 

And you’re done! (E tá pronto o sorvetinho :D)

Now for more info:

This post by @chawoongs with everything you need to know regarding TS files and where to get them *blows a kith for my fave boy*

These two alternative tutorials, which I did not read but might just be more coherent than my own: 1 and 2

I’ve done this for a while so things are mechanic for me. If I jumped any step that is not clear to you don’t hesitate to send me a message! 

[yourreddancer]

More of Drumpf’s whining...

F Braun McAshWHEN IN PANIC, WHEN IN DOUBT, RUN IN CIRCLES, SCREAM AND SHOUT...

Trump has announced on Truth Social going to file a Motion to suppress evidence seized pursuant to the Mar a Lardo search warrant, claiming his 4th amendment rights were brutally violated.He’s threatening to do this before he has seen the affidavit submitted in support of the warrant and before charges have been filed. Basically, he’s whining that his 4th amendment rights have been violated.

Which is utter BS. First, in order to obtain such a warrant, (especially one which cites the Espionage Act) you already have enough evidence to present to a grand jury. It was signed off by a Republican judge that he himself appointed. (campaign finance records show that Judge Reinhart, by the way, donated to the “Trump Make America Great Again Committee.” – so much for the alleged ‘witch hunt…’)    And it was in direct response to three months of ignoring a subpoena for at least 20 boxes of government-owned documents that he illegally removed from the WH when he slunk out of DC – documents that contain both top secret and SCI classified material, which he did not nor COULD NOT declassify by fiat.

Documents, incidentally, that his lickspittle lackey Kash Patel had been threatening to release to the public – a feat he would never have accomplished had he actually tried, but the idea he thought he could as Trump’s ‘official representative’ shows how little he knows about the procedures surrounding TS/SCI information, or just delusional hubris.(

Trump, incidentally, wanted to make Patel Deputy Director of the CIA until the real director told him she’d resign if he tried) The reasons for this attempted idiocy were obvious.Trump had also become convinced that there were still all kinds of classified documents lying around inside the CIA that would harm his enemies — Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, former CIA Director John Brennan and others.Trump regarded Patel as somebody who he could trust to do whatever he asked, without challenging, slow-walking, questioning his judgment or asking too many annoying questions. As I said – lickspittle lackey.

Truth Social, by the way, is owned by Digital World Acquisition Corp (NASDAQ: DWAC) - a shell company. They describe Truth Social as “America’s Big Tent Social Media Platform.” It's essentially the social media outlet Trump and his allies built after Twitter and Facebook threw him off their platforms. Truth Social is a tiny player in social media. Statista estimates Truth Social had just 3% of the US Social Media market on 6 May 2022.

It’s also bleeding out. Financial data shows Digital World (DWAC) generates no revenue and loses money. For instance, Digital World reported a $1.86 million cost of revenue and no revenue on 31 March 2022 and a quarterly operating loss of -$1.91 million on 31 March 2022. Digital World reported a negative quarterly operating cash flow of -$590,000 and a quarterly ending cash flow of $40,000 on 31 March 2022. DWAC is borrowing money to finance its operations.

You know… like Trump.

But back to his 4th amendment jibberish. The Fourth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution requires that a person, the person’s home, and their papers and affects, can’t be searched without a warrant. There was a legal warrant. Warrants can only be granted if the police have probable cause to believe that evidence of a crime is located within the area of the desired search. They searched the residence – with one of his lawyers – Christina Bobb – present. The evidence described in the warrant was found.

There are five major points to suppressing evidence based on violation of 3th amendment rights.1. the evidence was obtained in an unreasonable search done without a warrant,2. the police obtained evidence in violation of the suspect’s right to a lawyer,3. the suspect was not properly Mirandized,4. the police had a search warrant, but it was defective or deficient, and5. police failed to preserve the chain of custody of the evidence

.None of this applies. Not one single point. (Trump had received a copy of the warrant and was in NY at the time – Mirandizing doesn’t apply. Suspects only have to be given their Miranda warning before a custodial interrogation which implies they are in the custody of police or authorities) So the idea of attempting to pre-empt the upcoming indictments by pulling this 4th amendment balderdash which hasn’t a ghost of a chance of flying is really a good indication of what pathetic representation he’s receiving from his legal team.

This team includes such luminaries as Bobb was previously a host on the far-right, pro-Trump television network One America News and whose prior legal experience at the federal level consists mainly of a handful of trademark infringement cases on behalf of CrossFit. Trump’s other lawyer currently based in Florida is Lindsey Halligan, A search of federal court records found no filings under her name, and Alina Habba, who leads a three-attorney firm with an office near Trump’s golf club in Bedminster, NJ. Her professional experience includes serving as general counsel to a parking garage company.

No wonder he’s panicking.

[memecucker]

On Tuesday, the Supreme Court confronted a seemingly simple question: If an American corporation aids and abets child slavery in a foreign country, can its victims sue the company in an American court? Given that SCOTUS has repeatedly granted corporations the same rights as actual humans, you might think the answer is obvious. But it isn’t, because the same justices who think corporations deserve free speech and religious liberty do not believe they should be saddled with the same legal responsibilities as real people. Neal Katyal, who defended the companies accused of abetting child slavery, proposed an extreme theory that would shield all corporations from lawsuits under a crucial federal law. A majority of justices might not be ready to endorse this radical position. But they may still find a way to let Katyal’s clients off the hook.

Although Katyal is a staunch critic of Donald Trump who frequently represents progressive causes, he sided with corporate interests—and the Trump administration—on Tuesday. The case involves a class-action lawsuit filed by six citizens of Mali. These individuals were allegedly trafficked to the Ivory Coast between the ages of 12 and 14. Once there, they were allegedly forced to work on cocoa plantations for no pay and little food. They say they were regularly whipped and tortured by overseers who routinely inflicted sadistic punishments. One plaintiff tried and failed to escape; when he was caught, his overseers allegedly cut the soles of his feet, rubbed chile pepper into the wounds, then tied him to a tree and beat him until he sustained severe, permanent injuries. Such atrocities on the Ivory Coast’s cocoa plantations are well documented.

The plaintiffs also claim that two U.S. corporations, Nestle and Cargill, aided and abetted their enslavement. They assert that both companies knew their suppliers enslaved children yet continued to provide “financial and technical assistance to cocoa plantations.” The companies allegedly exerted substantial influence over the plantations to maintain the supply of cheap cocoa even after discovering human rights abuses.

This complicity, the plaintiffs allege, renders the companies liable under the Alien Tort Statute. First passed in 1789, the ATS gives federal courts authority to hear lawsuits filed by foreigners alleging a violation of international law. In theory, the ATS should put America at the vanguard of human rights protection, opening the nation’s courthouse doors to noncitizens who seek accountability for violators of the law of nations. In practice, the law barely exists anymore, because the Supreme Court’s conservative justices have relentlessly hacked away at it. Time and again, the court has strictly limited the ATS’ application, despite strong evidence that it was meant to be interpreted broadly.

Two years ago, by a 5–4 vote, the conservatives granted foreign corporations immunity from ATS lawsuits. On Tuesday, Katyal asked the court to expand this immunity to American corporations—meaning, in effect, that no corporations, foreign or domestic, can be sued under the statute. (He was joined by the Trump administration, which sided with Nestle and Cargill.) In his brief, Katyal argued that allowing corporate liability would “place U.S. firms at a competitive disadvantage compared to companies in countries” with a law similar to the ATS. And he argued that liability “would discourage foreign investment in the United States by foreign firms concerned about triggering expansive ATS liability.” Katyal also claimed that the “international community” does not support holding corporations responsible for violations of international law. For support, he pointed out that the Nuremberg prosecutors declined to prosecute “the firm that supplied Zyklon B gas, which the Nazis used to kill millions.”

Katyal’s arguments had a surprisingly chilly reception at the Supreme Court on Tuesday. Justice Clarence Thomas, no friend of the ATS, noted that while “there may not be an international norm” allowing corporate liability, the plaintiffs say there is an international norm against slavery. Katyal retorted: “I think that the norm that they’re asserting is not child slavery, but aiding and abetting child slavery.” And the plaintiffs “have not a single case” that holds there is an international norm against such conduct.

[noaltbruh]

BUCCI GANG AND HOW THEY WOULD PLAY UNDERTALE

Since I got my friend into the UT fandom, and the brainrot for this game is slowly coming back, I've figured that I'd fuse my favourite franchises and make this post, enjoy!

GIORNO:

-This may surprise you, but Giorno would almost do a Blind Pacifist run

-While at first, he was planning on taking out whoever got in his way, he changed his mind in the moment he saw Toriel

-After she taught him how to resolve the various conflicts peacefully, he decided not to fight, but to show MERCY to every monster

-He finds the multiplicity of choices a very interesting mechanism, especially since he's not much of a gamer, and he's pleasantly surprised to see such an innovative game

-While most of the times he would completely avoid the FIGHT button, if a monster got on his nerves a little too much, he may attack it until it doesn't want to fight anymore

-He takes the time to interact with everything and everyone, he wants to enjoy the game at its fullest

-He was so freaking lucky to meet Gaster on his first run

-Actually brought the piece of snowman with him

-He's part of the "Chara defense squad", and finds them strangely...relatable

-He was just about to do a full Pacifist route, but he couldn't bring himself to SPARE Flowey, and killed him

-"I won't let you hurt her"

-Ultimately, he regretted it, and reset his save file

-After doing a TRUE Pacifist, he left the game, leaving the monsters alone and giving them an happy ending

-Only knows about the Genocide through gameplays

-Favourite character: Toriel, but also likes Chara quite a lot

-Favourite OST: Memories, followed by home, Undertale, Megalo strikes back and Star (he doesn't care if they actually don't play in the game)

-What SOUL would he have: DETERMINATION

BRUNO:

-My man wouldn't hurt a fly if he had the chance to, off to the Pacifist route he goes

-Similar to Giorno, he finds Toriel a very comforting character, but he feels bad for pretty much every monster he meets. He thinks it's unfair for them to be forced to stay in the UNDERGROUND, and wants to find a way to destroy the barrier at any cost

-He's never played a videogame before, but he gets the hand of it quite quickly, even though he still ends up dying a couple of times.

-He would also be the kind of player to interact with EVERYTHING, paying close attention to whatever the passing monster has to say

-Sometimes, he likes to take a break, lay down and listen to the OST of the place he's exploring

-The most challenging enemies for him were Undyne and Asgore. It took him a while to realize that the only way to spare her was to run away, and he just really didn't want to hurt Goat papa

-He lets the bird carrying him to the other side, even if he doesn't actually need to move around. He just wants the little guy to feel appreciated

-Veeeery reluctantly, he decided to SPARE Flowey, it would have been a waste to kill somebody now, after everything that he had done so far

-He almost cried at the Pacifist ending

-He refuses to even acknowledge what happened in the Genocide route

-Favourite characters: Toriel and Asgore

-Favourite OST: Fallen down, but he also likes Heartache, Home and Waterfall

-What SOUL would he have: KINDNESS

MISTA:

-Mista's first run would be a Neutral. It's not that he enjoys killing the monsters, he's mostly just too lazy to think of a way to spare them

-If it's obvious, however, he'll just casually show the enemy MERCY, there's no need to take out absolutely everyone

-The only one who he genuinely looked for a way to spare was Papyrus. Honestly, he couldn't bring himself to just hurt him 'cause he had the chance to. Besides...He was afraid of what Sans would have done

-Speaking of him, he finds his jokes HILARIOUS, and he will use them in real life conversations if he gets the chance to

-He basically wasted all his money fighting Undyne

-He didn't buy the spider donut in the RUINS, and was forced to farm gold for 3 entire freaking days and buy one directly from Muffet

-After finishing the neutral route, he decided to go back and try the others. His next route was a Genocide

-He was about to shoot his computer AND himself while fighting Sans, but he eventually managed to beat him. Of course, after swearing at 3 A. M., drinking 10 cans of Sprite, listening to Megalovania on loop and threatening to throw Narancia out of the window because he interrupted him while he was playing

-His favourite moment during the Pacifist was cooking with Undyne

-He immediately questioned his life choices when he finished the route and saw Chara taking over Frisk's body. Closed the game and never opened it again

-Favourite characters: Papyrus, Sans and Undyne. He refuses to choose an absolute favorite

-Favourite OSTs: Megalovania and Song that might play when you fight Sans. He also likes Bonetroulse and Spear of justice

-What SOUL would he have: BRAVERY

NARANCIA:

-Narancia playing this game would be a total mess. Ironic, considering he's the one in the gang that likes video games the most

-Despite Toriel's guidance, at first, he would FIGHT every monster that got in his way, following the simple "It's an rpg, the more I kill, the better it is" logic

-When he saw the "but nobody came" screen, however, he freaked the hell out and immediately reset

-After that mini heart attack, he went on a full Pacifist route. However, sometimes, he would snap and accidentally kill a monster. He lost count of how many times he had to reload the file

-He also really likes Toriel (she's just very popular among the Bucci gang). The reason for it...Is not a very happy one, like in Giorno's case

-He genuinely tried to stay with her, he didn't want to leave Goat mom

-He's the one who gets emotionally invested in the game the most, he even forgets it's a game at times and just erase the surrounding world from his head

-He LOVES to voice the characters while he plays, it makes the story feel way more alive for him. He makes a very good Papyrus impression

-Speaking of which, his favourite parts of the game were the interactions between Sans and Papyrus.

-He lost his s**t when he arrived at the Temmie village. He stayed there FOR HOURS farming money. Heck, he even bought the Temmie armor

-He refused to open the game for two days after Flowey stole the SOULS

-He wanted to ask someone to play the TRUE lab with him, but he refused to admit that he was scared

-While he's not the kind of player who stops by to read every dialogue, he makes an exception for Snowdin. He really likes that area of the game!

-While he would never admit it, he cried three times during the Pacifist route. The first time when he left Toriel, the second when he heard Chara and Asriel's story, and the third when he finished it

-His favourite fight in the game is the one against Asriel. He kept on repeating the "Don't you have anything better to do" dialogue for 20 minutes, before giving up to the idea that there was really no way to save him

-After giving the monster an happy ending, he was overwhelmed by his own curiosity, and decided to try the Genocide route...Boy did it go wrong

-You thought he cried a lot during the Pacifist? He became a freaking fountain during the Genocide. Every single time he killed a Boss, he cried, with no exception

-He spent days trying to defeat Sans, until he was given the option to SPARE him, and so he did

-...The others could hear him yelling from the other floor after what happened next

-He got tired of Sans' bulls**ts, reset and did a Pacifist again

-He watched a gameplay to know what happened in the Genocide ending. Chara's jumpscare still haunts him

-Narancia gets really involved in the stuff made by the fandom, especially fan made songs and comics

-He listens to "To the bone" religiously, it's part of his routine

-He tried and failed to figure out how AUs work

-Favourite character: Papyrus, followed by Toriel and Asriel. He used to like Sans a lot too...But now he gets Vietnam flashbacks every time he thinks about him

-Favourite OSTs: Bonetroulse, Hopes and dreams and Snowdin. He can't choose between them

-What SOUL would he have: INTEGRITY

FUGO:

-Fugo would categorically refuse to reset on his first run. What it's done, it's done, and he has to take responsibilities for his choices

-He would do a Neutral, killing whoever he encounters, but without specifically looking for the monsters just so that he can kill them

-That doesn't mean, however, that he dislikes to play with the timeline. It's quite the opposite, to be honest

-Fugo enjoys messing around with the save files A LITTLE too much, dude basically became an hacker playing this game

-In his attempt to make a Pacifist run, he fu**ed up and accidentally got the Hacker ending

-"...THIS IS NOT WHAT I MEANT WHEN I SAID I WANTED EVERY ENDING"

-He toned it down a little after that, but he still managed to modify the FUN value enough to meet Gaster and his followers

-He's also the only one who unlocked Sans' room. He doesn't trust him, but he finds him an interesting character

-Neither the Pacifist or Genocide endings particularly picked his interest, even though he did punch the walls a couple of times fighting Sans

-He likes to try the different Neutral endings, he doesn't do all of them, just the ones he thinks that would affect the monsters the most

-The only character he got attached to emotionally was Alphys, he can see himself a lot in her

-He's very interested in the various theories that surround this game, and he's waiting for Deltarune to come out, he just wants to know more about Gaster

-Favourite character: Alphys, but Gaster is a close second

-Favourite OST: Darker, darker, yet darker, followed by Here we are, Waterfall and Premonition

What SOUL would he have: faded BRAVERY

ABBACCHIO:

-MERCY? Is that a food? Yeah uhm...No, that doesn't exist with Abbacchio, nothing but Genocide for him

-It's already a surprise someone convinced him to play this game. He'll play in his own way, and that means killing literally everyone, not simply the ones he encounters, but even looking for them just to earn more Exp

-He was...Weirdly satisfied when he saw the "But nobody came" screen, and he was lucky enough to find every monster almost immediately

-He hadn't found a single character that he liked until he reached Undyne. Her sense of justice reminded him of his old self, which wasn't exactly pleasant at first, but at least he felt something

-He was finally happy to see a monster actually trying to stop what he was doing, and killing her was the only thing in the game that made him slightly sad

-He's still offended for not having the chance to kill monster kid, he couldn't stand that child

-He skipped through pretty much every dialogue in the game, not that there are many people to interact with during the Genocide...

-He'd eat a piece of the snowman right in front of him just to spite him, then take the rest and leave

-He didn't care about whatever Flowey was trying to tell him about his past. That's also because without knowing he's Asriel, most of what he says doesn't really make sense

-In the moment Sans dodged his attack, he realized that he had screwed up REALLY bad. After dying against him a couple of times, he considered resetting, but he wouldn't have let "the lazy skelefu**" have it his way

-He let out a huge "YES" and a sigh of relief when he finally managed to hit him, it took him around a week

-However, little did he know, that the worst still had to come. When he noticed that he wasn't the one who had just killed Asgore and Flowey, he freaked out a little, and Chara staring directly at him made him feel a small shiver down his spine

-Still, he decided to decline their offer to destroy everything, not because he regretted what he had done, he just wanted his revenge on the child for scaring him

-He closed the game after the jumpscare, and never questioned what the hell he had been through

-Favourite character: Undyne

-Favourite OSTs: But nobody came and Battle against a true hero, he also likes The fallen child

-What SOUL would he have: very very faded JUSTICE

TRISH:

-Trish got into this game just because of its music, she kept on hearing it everywhere and wanted to understand where it came from

-She was kinda scared at first, videogames aren't exactly her forte, and her encounter with Flowey didn't help

-She slowly got used to the dynamics of the game, even though she died at least three times in every area, exept for the RUINS. (She only got a game over two times there)

-She doesn't have the heart to hurt anybody, she thinks the monsters (well...Most of them, at least) are adorable! Shyren is her favourite minor enemy, and when she saw the "Taking piano lessons again" text, her heart melted a little

-She refused to take off the faded ribbon until she found she tutu, but she never sold either of them

-She loves flirting with literally ANYONE. You can? Well then...You must!

-Her favourite area is Hotland, including the Core too. She loves the whole "artificial" theme of the place, and she had a lot of fun reading Alphys's posts!

-She would pretend to be an actual part of Mettaton's programmes, but only when she was 100% sure nobody could hear her

-Needless to say, the boss fight against him was one of the funniest parts of the story for her

-Another thing she absolutely adored were the dates with Papyrus and Alphys, especially the latter. After everything that had happened, it was a nice opportunity to relax for a bit

-Similar to Narancia, Trish gets really involved emotionally in playing the game, and she had to take a little break from it before facing Asgore

-The ending genuinely made her cry, but it was the only time she shed a tear through it

-She doesn't care about trying the Genocide, she's worked hard to give the monsters an happy ending, and she wasn't going to throw it away

-She's in love with the Undertale Musical by Man on the Internet, she knows pretty much every song by memory

-Favourite character: Mettaton, but she honestly really likes all of them

-Favourite OST: Death by glamour, followed by Metal crusher, Power of NEO, and Another medium

-What SOUL would she have: INTEGRITY

Yes, I know that Narancia's part is longer, but it's just so funny to write about this baby, bear with me please 😌

[procrastinatorimagines]

Request: Could u do a Hank voight imagine where Adam is the reader's older brother and they both work in the unit and they knew she was seeing someone but didnt know who until Adam went to the readers house one night and Hank was there and that when he found out and the next morning they stopped hiding it. Something really fluffy and maybe some smut if u can if not just fluff ❤❤

Word Count: 2,160

xxx

“Who is it?-” a nudge to the back of your chair as you tried to do your paperwork- “come on... tell me...-” another harder kick had you swivelling in your chair to glare at your older brother, Adam Ruzek.

“Stop.” You demanded, pointing your finger at him. He shrugged and threw a crumpled bit of paper, which bounced off your head as you seethed.

“Tell me and I will,” he replied with a shrug. He knew you had a gun too right?

“What are you, twelve?” You asked, annoyance and angry plain on your face. You saw Burgess roll her eyes from across the room and Atwater bury his head in his own paperwork, trying not to get involved in the latest Ruzek family squabble.

Adam opened his mouth to make a snarky retort when Voight opened his office door. “The both of you better be finishing off your work,” he said as Adam slid his chair back to his desk, “multiple people advised me against having siblings in this unit, don’t make me regret it.” You shot him a grateful look before turning to get back to your work, knowing he’d done that more for your benefit than anything else. 

Adam had been relentless both in and out of work trying to figure out who you’d been dating ever since he’d found men’s clothing at your apartment. He’d guessed just about everyone you knew, reasoning, and correctly at that, that the only reason you’d be this stubborn about telling him the guys name is because it’s someone he knows. You glanced at Voight through his office window, chewing the end of your pen. If only he knew...

You double checked the time as you continued your work in silence, trying to get through these reports as quickly as possible so you could head off home, but at least you had tonight to look forward to. For the first time in a while both you and Voight had a free night, so he was coming over and helping you make a nice homemade dinner. You were aware of how domestic it sounded, given that this was initially supposed to be a casual thing, but the thought of spending a genuinely normal night together had you nearly grinning to yourself as you dotted the last of the Is and crossed the last of the Ts before finishing your paperwork.

Closing down your computer you grabbed your coat and bag, heading over to Voight’s office to hand him your closed file, ‘accidently’ hitting your brother on the back of the head with it as you passed, much to his annoyance. 

Voight signaled for you to come in as you knocked, putting it on his desk with a grin as he noticed the post it note you’d added, ‘see you at 8, I might have bought something new...’ He scrunched it up quickly, trying to mask his expression, but the look in his eyes said all you needed to know about his plans for tonight. 

Schooling your own features you winked at him before turning and heading back out the door, saying night to your colleagues as you left, heading down to the carpark with a little spring in your step as you looked forward to the rest of your night. 

- 

8 rolled by quickly, but you were already ready, finishing applying the last of your make up as Voight knocked on the door, never one to be even a minute late. You didn’t have to dress up fancy for a night in, but since you didn’t exactly both go out as a couple this was the only chance you had to go all out, and that included your outfit.

Voight took you in as you opened the door, smiling as he gave you a quick kiss and entered your apartment. “You look incredible,” he told you, slipping his free hand around your waist, the other carrying a very fancy bottle of wine. 

“Why thank you,” you kissed him again, “you clean up okay I guess,” you grinned as he raised a brow.

“You guess?” You both laughed as he took off his coat, “Well I appreciate it thank you, I do try sometimes.” You winked at him as you both went further inside, taking the wine and putting it in the fridge for later. 

“Hey, before we put aside work mode for the night-” he took your hands and pulled you closer, looking a little more serious for a second. You both had a rule about work talk when you were together, and it was only broken when it was important. “-this thing with you and Adam isn’t going to be a problem is it?” You shook your head.

“It shouldn’t be- I- no, I’ll handle it,” you told him, and he nodded.

“That’s all I needed to hear,” he smiled again and relaxed, looking you up and down in your dress.

“Is that the something new you bought?” He asked and you wrapped your arms around his neck, leaning you whisper in his ear.

“Well, I am wearing it,” you told him, earning a certain kind of look that had your head swimming.

“Is that right?” He asked and you bit your lip as he wrapped his arms around you again and planted a kiss on your neck. “We could always have dinner later...”

“And what did you have in mind in the mean time?” You asked innocently, pretending you didn’t put on something red and lacy for this very reason.

Instead of answering verbally, he pushed you back against the fridge, hands slipping down to the edge of your dress and his mouth found yours. 

You were both so lost in the moment, in each other, that you didn’t even hear anyone else come in until you heard, in the most shocked and confused tone imaginable, “Oh my god!” 

Jumping away from each other you both turned to see your brother standing in the door way, spare key to your apartment in one hand and a pack of cream cakes in the other, which had been your version of a white flag since you were in arguments as kids. 

Adam looked between you and Voight, his boss, your boss for that matter, mouch open and eyes unblinked as his brain tried to process the scene in the room.

“Adam-” you open your mouth to say something, explain something, but there wasn’t anything you could say that he couldn’t already see, no way you could make what he’d just walked in on make anymore sense to him.

“Okay, well, I can’t ever unsee that,” he shook his head in disbelief as you glanced at him sympathetically. Looking to Voight you realised that probably for the first time since you’d known him, he was at a loss for words. Adam laughed a little and continued, “you know, the last time I caught you with a guy I’m pretty sure I nearly rung his neck in, can’t really do that in this situation.”

“That’d be wise,” Voight said, and Adam looked to him with his jaw clenched.

“That being said, I think I have enough right to at least ask what the hell you think you’re doing with my sister!” He raised his voice a little as he finished, putting down what was in his hands on the counter and crossing his arms.

“Now listen here-” Voight began, but you put a hand on his arm to stop him, noticing that he was putting on his Sergeant voice. The last thing this situation needed was anybody pulling rank, Adam actually had a point in this instance. 

“He’s right Hank,” you said, noticing Adam biting his tongue as you calling him ‘Hank’ instead of Sergeant or Voight. “I’m sorry you had to find out like this,” you directed your attention to your brother, trying to be reasonable. 

“Like this? Is there some other way I was supposed to find out that you were screwing our boss?!” Adam snapped back. Okay, so maybe the reasonable and mature approach wasn’t going to cut it, but you guessed you’d probably lose your cool a bit if you walk in on Adam and... well, Platt. 

You tried to get that image out of your head as Voight took a step forward. “Watch your tone” he said calmly, but the order behind the words was all too clear. 

“Watch my tone? I just walked in on my boss with his tongue down my little sister’s throat and his hands up her skirt and... what? I’m supposed to act like there’s any version of this that’s okay?” Adam held his ground, face getting redder as you tried to quickly think of a way to cool the situation before the two men came to blows. Adam looked ready to throw a punch, and Voight was hardly the kind to not return fire. 

Stepping between them you faced your brother. Adam and Voight were two of the most stubborn people on the planet, and this could get ugly fast.

“I love him,” you blurted, stopping both men in their tracks as they looked at you in shock. Okay, so maybe that was the first time you were saying those three words, but you meant it, and you knew Adam could see that too as he searched your face.

“You... what?” He asked, dumbfounded. You could tell his brain had been exploding all over the place trying to process everything he’d seen tonight.

“You heard me,” you said gently, looking back to see Voight smiling at you as he took your hand, standing to face Adam as a couple.

He took between the two of you and down to your hands. “Well... Jesus Christ Y/N, what am I supposed to go with that?” He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed defeatedly.

“Let me be happy,” you shrugged, “that’s all I’m asking.” Voight gave your hand a soft squeeze.

Adam laughed a little at that, but more in disbelief than malice. “That is... so not all you’re asking Y/N, come on-” Okay, so maybe it was a bit more complicated than that... but still.

“I care about your sister, and I love her too,” Voight added when a silence fell between you and your brother, “So if you have a problem with that, so be it, but that isn’t going to change how we feel about each other.” You were surprised by the candor in his words, Voight wasn’t exactly the vulnerable kind, it’d taken him long enough to open up to you at all, let alone tell anyone else how you felt about each other.

“Well then I guess there’s nothing left to say then is there? You’re... in love, just-” Adam took a breath and turned his attention to Voight, “if you hurt her, I’ll-”

“I won’t, I wouldn’t” he promised and then smirked, “but I am curious to see what you think you could do to me.”

“Hank-” You started to warn but Adam just laughed dryly. 

“No- no, you know what? Tonight has been a lot more than I bargained for, I’m... just going to leave now, try and wash out any images of what you two’ll get up to when I’m gone from my brain.” Adam decided, giving you a quick brotherly kiss on the cheek before heading for the door, grabbing the keys and hesitating for a second over the cream cakes before leaving them and walking out.

“Well, that was unexpected,” Voight said after he heard the door slam shut, laughing a little at the ridiculousness of the situation.

“What the hell just happened?” You questioned, grateful that at least Adam had left the cream cakes, that at least meant that he wasn’t still entirely mad, but you knew he was far from okay with this situation.

Voight brushed a strand of hair out of your face and looked into your eyes. “I do love you you know, I meant every word of that.” 

“Me too,” you replied, knowing that now was the time for that serious, what next?, conversation. “What do we do now?”

“Right now?” He grinned and you shook your head.

“You know what I mean-” you told him, but instead of replying he kissed you gently.

“I know,” he told you, “I also know Adam well enough to know that he’s going to at least tell Atwater and Burgess...”

“Who’ll tell Vanessa and Hailey, who’ll tell Jay.” You finished for him.

“I guess we may as well... come clean,” he said seriously and slowly.

“It’s better they hear it from us than through the grapevine,” you reasoned, “and I guess it wouldn’t be so bad if we didn’t have to hide anymore.”

“No, no it wouldn’t,” another kiss and you were back against the fridge, memories of what you were doing before you got interupted coming back as you sunk into Voight’s embrace. 

“Tomorrow though?” You smiled between kisses.

“Definitely.”