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eviesaurusrex · 2 months ago

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ᴄʜᴏꜱᴇɴ ᴡɪꜱᴇʟʏ | ʙ. ʙᴀʀɴᴇꜱ

Mobster!Bucky Barnes x Reader

summary: 5 incidents in which Bucky gets proven how lucky he is to have found you.

word count: 6.7k

warnings: MDNI, fluff, mobster typical themes, illusions to violence, more fluff, cursing, talks of marriage, starting a family etc., pregnancy, phantom pain, allusions to smutty time, slight dirty talk, my Google Translator skills for all things Russian, children, not perfetly proof-read

author’s note: Am I in my mobster era now? (Please don't try to strangle me when I butchered the Russian parts. I had only Google Translator as my trusty helper ;_; Dividers are made by @enchanthings-a and @strangergraphics!

Russian translations:

малышка (malyshka)—baby

милая (milaya)—darling

“Every day I wake up next to you, I pray to the gods and thank them for the love you give me. Every day I spend with you is more than I deserve. Every day I call myself lucky that you love me back, my dear. I love you more than anything in the world, more than the world, more than life itself. You are my everything. Thank you for making me the happiest man on this planet.”

“Should I stop telling you how good you feel around me? How good you take me? How perfect you look, all filled up with my cock and already pregnant with my baby?”

Привет, папочка (Privet, papochka)—Hello daddy

Привет, солнышко (Privet, solnyshko)—Hello sunshine

The first incident that proved him to have chosen wisely when following his heart for the first time in his life was when James Buchanan Barnes—fearsome crime lord, bratva leader, king of New York City’s underworld—found himself in the aftermath of a crossfire after a deal gone south. His doctor had just arrived to check out the gunshot wounds littering his arm and shoulder, and in his opinion, everyone made too much of a fuss about it.

He was fine. He made it out with barely any scratches.

“Nine gunshots, only one bullet I have to remove. This is a new record, Mr. Barnes.”

… a few scratches; he had to give him that.

On the other hand, his entire left arm had been reduced to nothing but a pile of scrap metal, so perhaps Bucky had been hit rather badly if he took that into account. He wouldn’t because he had to be okay, invincible even. The world he was born into was a cruel one that reprimanded one’s weakness with downfall and despair, and he had to uphold the legacy that had been bestowed upon him the moment his father took his last dying breath in the same car crash that had taken his arm. He had people to protect—his associates, partners, workers, everyone that he considered friends or even family.

Topped by only one person, one woman, who sat above them all on a throne he had created for her right next to his. Not beneath him, not a step below—right fucking next to him.

Speaking of which… The commotion outside their bedroom sounded a lot like the whirlwind he deemed to be the love of his existence, and cursing above his breath, his eyes moved a second from the slightly opened door toward the doctor holding the single bullet between a pair of forceps.

“Don’t you dare step in my way.”

Her voice rushed like opium through his veins, making the mobster forget about the burning pain of holes inside his body.

“I can’t let you in there. Not now. The doctor is with him, you don’t want to see that,” Steve’s voice echoed through the hallway, probably stacked with high-towering security men. Just as high-towering as the blond was, and still, his girl did not show fear. No, not her. Never her.

A scoff was heard, and the physician beside him chuckled under his breath as he started to clean the wounds meticulously. Even Bucky showed a rare hint of emotion around other people than her when a grin parted his lips for a moment. “You’re his second. He is his doctor. I am his girlfriend. Think again if you want to continue standing in my way, Steve. I’m not above using brute force to get to him.”

Hearing that from a woman stopping not even close to all their eye levels would be laughable with any other person, but her? Everyone knew she would move heaven and hell in order to get wherever he was. He had learned this the hard way and would never dare leave her behind again, not when she demanded to tag along.

She really is a wonder.

Bucky wasn’t sure if he had spoken those words out loud, his mind starting to struggle with the blood loss and pain seeping deeper than necessary into him.

Shuffling before the door made the brunet open his eyes again. “Fucking hell, woman…” The hardwood door opened, and he could see the woman ruling his world without even starting to grasp the extent of her power over him, turning toward his second in command. “I hope you don’t kiss your mother with that mouth, Rogers,” she spoke sweetly before she finally turned, her eyes immediately finding him on their shared bed.

Worry creased her forehead, brows deeply furrowed, eyes jumping from his shoulder to his injured arm, then right to the one missing. Without another heartbeat, she rushed through the grand but still cozy room, showcasing her taste because Bucky had let her redecorate this entire fucking house as soon as she had agreed to move in with him—after much persuasion on his part. He wouldn’t have given a fuck if she would’ve decided to paint every single wall a screaming yellow if it would’ve made her happy.

“Hey, милая.” His raspy voice from all the shouting broke a bit at the signature endearment for her, and he wished to reach a hand out to her, but the lack of his arm was jarringly apparent. So all he could do was watch her carefully settling down onto her side of the bed, scooting over the mattress, a warm, soft hand cupping his cheek while the pad of her thumb started to caress his cheekbone. “Hey, love,” she returned the greeting with a smile, worried gaze flicking to Dr. Strange. “How bad is it? And don’t you dare try to sugarcoat me like Sam bloody tried on our way here. I do possess eyes, you see that, right?”

Dr. Strange nodded while preparing the stitching material. “I have removed one bullet from his shoulder. Nine shots in total. I’ve cleaned them and will stitch them as soon as the anesthetic takes effect.” Bucky could see her nodding at the doctor’s explanation and tried to nuzzle closer into the palm of her hand. “Milaya?” She finally looked down on him. “I’m okay, ‘promise. They busted m’arm, though.”

His words turned slurred, slowly but steadily, and he focused on her soft smile that was always entirely reserved for him and baby kittens. He could live with that sort of competition.

“We will talk later, but I promise I’ll take a look at your arm, and in case there isn’t anything left to save, I’ll make you a new one, James.” She pressed a gentle, loving kiss to his sweat-covered forehead. “Now relax, my love. I’ll be here when you wake up.” Her voice echoed in his ears when the drugs finally kicked in, clinging to the sound of her.

Yes, he had been smart enough to ignore his stupid rule of not letting anyone get closer than necessary. She proved him right every damn time.

The second incident that proved him to have chosen wisely when following his heart for the first time in his life was on a regular day in December. Snow fell softly outside the grand brownstone they had chosen to spend the holidays at rather than the house outside the city. His girl had wanted to finally spend Christmas in the buzzing city again, and he had ordered their things packed and moved within a blink of an eye.

Now, everyone enjoyed their little piece of heaven surrounded by their families. Yelena and Natasha had returned to Russia for the holidays, Steve spent time with his own wife, while Sam had decided to go south to see his parents and check in with a few associates while he was already there.

Meanwhile, the feared bratva mobster, leader of the darkest pits of New York’s underworld, watched his girlfriend-soon-to-be-fiancée add a few more pieces they had picked up at Tiffany’s today to their Christmas tree, humming to the soft tunes of an old record wafting through the living room. His blue eyes, usually so menacing and threatening, rested with a loving expression on the woman he had sworn to protect with his life, one arm thrown over the back of the comfy couch he had spent a fortune on—but his queen fell in love with it at first sight and couldn’t find anything better suiting. Not that she had to. The shining black Centurion Card had been pulled out of the inside pocket of his black suit jacket the second Bucky had seen that look on her face.

He would buy her anything in this world, spoiling her rotten until she’d drown in pretty things.

“I think we need more lights,” she stated in a mumble, almost to herself, before turning toward him. “Don’t we? We need more lights, yes.” And so it was decided, and he smiled at her turning back when she started to roam through the red holiday box to find the last remaining string of colorful fairy lights. “No, wait.” Lifting a dark brow, the man watched her reach for the small package he had eyed since they’ve returned instead, all wrapped prettily and neatly.

Scooting across the soft carpet toward where he sat, his girl smiled up at him, holding the small present out to him before folding her hands over his muscular thigh, waiting patiently. “It’s not your Christmas present, but I saw it and… and I needed to do this. To have something for our tree.”

Their first real tree as a couple. The past three years, they had been too busy during the holiday season, barely being at home, not to mention the little time they would’ve had to go out, find a tree, and decorate it, so it would be appreciated as it deserved. This year, however, Bucky craved the comforts of their home, and he wanted to start collecting memories like this.

He bent over to her, pressing a lingering kiss to her forehead, hand cupping her cheek tenderly, the little gift almost vanishing in the vastness of his hands. “Thank you, моя милая.” How in all the hells had he become so lucky in finding this woman who now grinned up at him with unabashed happiness? “Open it! Open it already!” And he obliged, feeling giddy himself as she almost bounced on her knees, unwrapping the small box and opening the lid to reveal a perfectly crafted snowflake ornament, a picture of them together in Central Park during the worst snowstorm the city had witnessed in over a decade placed inside the clear crystal. Their smiling faces, almost hidden behind scarves and beanies, angled to one another, her lips pressing a snow-filled kiss to the corner of his smiling lips.

It was perfect.

She was perfect.

Gods be damned, but in that moment, when his eyes found hers again, he felt the overwhelming urge to drop down on his knees and ask for a lifetime together. But he wouldn’t. He had it all planned out, and he used to stick to his plans. He was patient beyond compare, but not when it involved this woman before him. So instead of caving to this sensation, Bucky carefully placed the crystal snowflake onto the coffee table in front of him and pulled his girl up into his lap in one smooth motion, wrapping her in his strong arms, fingers—both flesh and metal—tangling in soft strands of hair or gripping the soft black fabric of the hoodie she wore which once belonged to him.

“Каждый день я просыпаюсь рядом с тобой, молюсь богам и благодарю их за любовь, которую ты мне даришь. Каждый день, который я провожу с тобой, больше, чем я заслуживаю. Каждый день я называю себя счастливчиком, что ты любишь меня в ответ, моя дорогая. Я люблю тебя больше всего на свете, больше мира, больше самой жизни. Ты — мое все. Спасибо, что сделал меня самым счастливым человеком на этой планете, малышка,” Bucky rasped in Russian with his forehead pressed to hers and eyes intimately locked, watching the shy smile he loved so dearly spreading on her lips and making her eyes twinkle.

“I don’t know if you have insulted me just now, proclaimed your undying love for humble me, or started the dirty talk earlier than usual, but either way, I don’t mind.” Her fingers wrapped around his chin to pull his face closer to hers, lips touching when she added in a breathless whisper, “It sounded hot, so keep talking dirty to me, love.”

Giggling, his girl accepted the tender kisses of chapped lips to her cheeks, her nose, her forehead, her lips. He felt the uncomfortable pull on his skin again when Bucky smiled at her, his split lip still not entirely healed after a punch he couldn’t dodge in time. Under her care, it will have vanished until next week when the photographer planned to take a few pictures for their first Christmas postcards.

Bucky still struggled to grasp how his life had turned in that particular manner. He never thought he’d be one for domesticity and familiar bliss, but with her?

He was all in.

The third incident that proved him to have chosen wisely when following his heart for the first time in his life was when James Buchanan Barnes, invincible mob boss, returned home in the dead of night in a frantic temper, his entourage strolling behind him, accepting his orders with grave faces and solemn nods.

“Don’t let him out of your fucking sight. Track him as soon as he leaves his godforsaken home, track him inside his own walls, hell, track when he takes a piss. I don’t fucking care!” His booming voice echoed through the foyer, and with another deep growl, he handed his weapons to Sam; two remained in the holster, hugging his broad shoulders. He wouldn’t take them off, not until the threat was decimated under his foot. “We’ll do a 24/7 surveillance on him, boss. He won’t come near her,” Steve promised, knowing damn well what would happen to all of their heads if they couldn’t protect her.

Bucky bared his teeth in disgust. “You better not fuck this up, Steve.” This would be his first and only warning, and the blond knew that, so he nodded and retreated into his office, knowing damn well that sleep would be nothing but a pleasant memory for a while—he wouldn’t be alone, though. Everyone knew how their boss got when his queen was threatened by others. Those threats had already started to grow in numbers as soon as the underworld learned of their engagement, and outsiders trying everything to get in and on good graces with certain families smelled a quick victory.

How wrong they were in those foolish assumptions.

Sam watched his boss almost anxiously while he desperately tried to cool off, fists pressed against the pretty surface of a pretty sideboard she had most definitely chosen.

“I will kill him. I’ll kill them all if I have to.”

At Bucky’s deep rumble, Sam could only hum in agreement. He would be right at his back, killing all who wanted to harm anyone he cared for, especially those inside this building.

“I could reach out to our associates in Louisiana, get some more backup and gunpower. There’s this kid who’s a marvel with tech. Maybe he can come up with a discreet solution for the in-house surveillance,” Sam suggested, knowing damn well how excited Parker would be when he finally allowed him to tag along, currently bored out of his brilliant mind at college. Bucky looked up and over his shoulder, icy blue eyes resting on one of his best men—and friend. But the creaking above their heads let him pause in his answer, and both men stared up the stairs, knowing who eavesdropped at the railing.

Bucky sighed deeply. “We need to work on your stealth skills, малышка,” he spoke up and waited for her steps to pick up and for her to shuffle down the stairs. She did in a pair of cozy yoga pants, a large hoodie hanging on her form—the one he had worn before changing into his suit this morning—and fluffy socks with reindeer and candy canes printed all over them, her hair wrapped in a messy bun on the top of her head, strands framing her face. In her arms throned a king amongst pets, and white fur littered the soft fabric of his hoodie where she held Alpine close to her chest.

His heart ached at the sight of her in the best possible way.

Her eyes wide with worry—not for herself, but for him and all his men—jumped between Sam and himself as she reached the second to last step and waited there.

“I didn’t mean to, but… I heard voices and thought you’d come home, but then I heard everyone talking and it was kind of too late to go back to bed anyway, so I figured I could… learn a bit.” Bucky started softly shaking his head, his outgrowing hair tickling his cheeks. “You meant eavesdropping, малышка. That’s the word you’re looking for here,” he deadpanned, and one corner of his mouth slightly lifted at the sound of her quiet laugh, her fingers comfortingly petting the white fluff ball currently purring at the attention and headbutting her hand for more.

With another sigh, he stepped up to the stairs, raising his gaze to his all-ruling queen, and he felt the tension in his shoulders slightly disappear when her hand came up to his neck and rested there comfortingly, fingers playing with the soft strands of his dark hair. “I’ll be alright, James,” she whispered, and he wasn’t sure how she could say that with such certainty when not even he felt so sure. “We’ll be alright, I just know it. Nothing and no one will keep me from you, from becoming your wife and living a very happy life with the man I love more than anything in this world, giving him the cutest fur babies and children the world has ever seen.” Bucky sucked in a breath, and after gently putting down Alpine, he pulled his soon-to-be wife in a bone-crushing hug, wrapping her legs around his hips with ease. “We will live until we turn old and grey and can look back at all the memories we made along the way, annoying our children and grandkids with endless, embarrassing stories,” she continued to whisper against the soft, tattooed skin of his neck and yes, he could see all that and more, too.

It was easy with her to picture this picture-perfect life—and he would do anything to make it a reality. He wouldn’t stop at murder and anarchy, not when it came to her.

So when he slightly turned to Sam with his woman in his arms, ready to put her back to bed, he only needed to mouth the words, and it was done.

Do it.

The fourth incident that proved him to have chosen wisely when following his heart for the first time in his life was during one of those forsaken nights.

He woke with a startle and a groan escaping him involuntarily, the dark bedroom embracing him, a soft, warm body tucked into the expanse of his back, slow breathing fanning across his heated skin. His hand shot up with another groan leaving him, cupping the stump where once had been an arm, feeling the same agonizing pain he had felt in that car all those years ago, almost bleeding to death after a rivaling family had tried to kill them all off.

Unfortunately, he had survived—and the revenge had been brutal the moment he had recovered enough to go on a killing spree.

Trying to breathe through the crashing sensations, Bucky tried to move as quietly and carefully as possible, not wanting to wake the woman sleeping peacefully beside him because she needed all the rest she could humanely get. But the pain was blinding, the feeling of warm blood flowing down his skin so real, he could’ve sworn there was still an arm to lose, and his fucking legs were still tangled in the damn blanket!

With a frustrated huff, the mobster tried to just roll out of bed in a desperate attempt, not minding falling face-first to the floor, but the blanket didn’t budge, and suddenly, an arm snaked across his waist, and a warm hand rested on his muscular abdomen.

“D’not go…”

The sleepy mumble pierced through the agony, and usually, Bucky always obliged to his wife’s every demand, but not now. Not this time. He couldn’t. He wouldn’t crumble in front of her. She needed him to be strong and capable. He had to protect her and the little plum. He couldn’t show weakness, not even in the comforts of their own home. Word would get out, the pit of New York City would smell blood, they would come and kill her in front of his very eyes, make him watch when the life would vanish from her breathtaking eyes, taunting him, before they would end his life as well, releasing him into the bliss of afterlife where he would search for her, and—….

“Bucky? What’s wrong?”

Her voice, now sounding more awake and aware, startled and pulled him out of his spiraling thoughts, and he could feel the mattress dip and move when she sat up and scooted closer to him. “Hey…” A soothing hand started to rub over his back. “Talk to me, love. C’mon, handsome, I can only help when I know what’s bothering you to such an unholy hour.” Her teasing made him almost smile—almost. But the pain returned in full force, and his hand gripped his shoulder even tighter.

“Phantom pain. It’s nothing I can’t handle, malyshka. Go back to sleep, you need it,” he rumbled quietly, his legs finally escaping the trap that was their blanket, and the man sat up, feet hitting the floor. He attempted to get up in order to leave her to the quietness of their room, but his wife had nothing the like on her mind. She held him back and scooted off the bed. “Stay. I’ll be right back.” Blinking into the dim light of her bedside table, he reached for her and tried to get up. “I’m fine, sweetheart. Go back to—”

She shushed him gently and pressed a finger to his lips. “I said Stay. I mean it.” With that, his woman granted him a serious glance before she patted into the adjacent bathroom, one hand cradling her already quite prominent bump, and all Bucky could hear was rummaging sounds in their cabinets and a quiet mumbling.

“Your papa is a handful sometimes, little one. Prepare yourself because I need you in my corner, okay? Okay.”

Smiling through the irritating pain, the mobster waited for her to return and watched her closely when she finally left the bathroom and patted back to their bed, a bottle of lotion in her hand. “You think you need the mirror, love?” Bucky glanced at the full-length mirror in their walk-in closet shrouded in darkness and decided with a soft shake of his head. “Maybe later if it’s not getting any better,” he mumbled in defeat, accepting the loving kisses pressed to his right temple and lips. “Just let me know, yeah?” He nodded at her request, and blue eyes watched her like a hawk when she settled right next to him, on the side of his missing arm, a squirt of lotion already between her soft hands warming it up.

“I told you to wake me up if it’s happening again,” his wife scolded him quietly, her incredible hands massaging the hurting stump of his shoulder. At first, it hurt like hell, but the more she kneaded and caressed, the more bearable it got. “You need your rest, milaya,” he returned with a lingering glance down her form, eyes equally heavy with worry and love when they settled on the little bump he had grown to love so dearly, it almost hurt.

Bucky felt her eyes on him in return and opened his arm when she stopped what she was doing to climb into his inviting lap, straddling him comfortably. Taking his hand into hers, she pushed the warm skin of her husband under his shirt she wore to sleep and placed his palm right on top of the soft curve before continuing.

“Not more than you need it, too. You’re running the mob empire, not me.” Her voice reminded him softly, and he let his forehead fall onto her shoulder, eyes closed, thumb caressing the warm skin of her bump, hoping, praying, he would feel something, anything. But according to all the books he had read so far, it would take a few more weeks until he could feel the slight movements their child did inside his wife. “And you’re growing a whole fucking human,” Bucky returned and got shushed again. “Watch your language, Barnes. I don’t want their first word to be anything obscene.”

But she couldn’t fool him. He heard her smile in the scolding.

A comfortable silence settled between them, then, reminding Bucky yet again why he had felt so good around her the second she had walked into that room in the hospital, only raising a brow at the sight of six buffed men clad in black suits, armed with more guns than one human could possibly need, and him sitting in the middle of it all—disheveled, still hurting, ice cold. She had smiled, wearing those ridiculous blue scrubs, and he had spotted a splash of blood on her light grey sneakers when she had come closer, pointing it out in almost something resembling disgust. Still, she only had rolled her pretty eyes at the pitiful attempt of an insult.

She hadn’t given a single fuck about those intimidating men—including him—all towering multiple heads above her, tattooed, guns always visible, the rough Russian language floating through the room occasionally. And he had respected her for that, even though he didn’t bother to be nice at first. In hindsight, Bucky would’ve earned a beating from his mother if she had been still alive. She had raised him better than treating a beautiful, kind, intelligent, and compassionate woman like he had initially treated her. But after a while, Bucky had felt how she had snaked her way into his thoughts, catching himself repeatedly thinking about her over the course of his day, starting to anticipate the next appointment to get his prosthetic measured, built, and adjusted, always looking forward to seeing her face.

She hadn’t given a flying fuck either when he finally revealed who he was and what he did, only cocking her head to the side in question and asking him, “Will you or one of your guys kill me after our time is over?” And when he had shook his head, denying those thoughts, she had smiled brightly, before turning back to the prosthetic arm she had crafted for him. “Then we don’t have a problem. Everyone has to earn their money somehow, James.” That was also the first time anyone had called him by that name since his parents had died, and he had fallen for her right then and there, ready to kneel at her feet and surer as hell that he would make her his queen.

“Don’t count on that, malyshka. Everyone around here is using filthy language, and do I need to remind you of certain… situations where the little plum currently has to listen in? Or do you want me to stop? Мне перестать говорить тебе, как хорошо ты себя чувствуешь рядом со мной? Как хорошо ты меня принимаешь? Как идеально ты выглядишь, вся заполненная моим членом и уже беременная моим ребенком?” He felt the pain slowly but steadily subside under her knowing and well-versed hands, feeling them stop in their magic as the huskily whispered Russian words flowed effortlessly over his lips, feeling her squirm in his lap.

Leaning slightly back in order to have a better look at his face, his wife bit her lower lip, making now the feared bratva leader squirm underneath her, his hand protectively pressed into her lower back, not daring to let her fall off of him. “You are a very evil man, James Barnes,” she hummed with almost a purring edge to her voice, making him grin as cocky as possible. “You married the worst of the bunch, malyshka—and you like it. You can’t hide it, not from me, never from me. Not when I’m balls-deep it that deliciously tight…—” Her lips pressing against his made him moan deep in his throat and stop taking altogether. Forgotten was the pain of the past. It still bothered him, somewhere in the back of his mind, but her scent, her taste, the feeling of his wife against him made him forget about it.

The past was the past, and now, only the present and the future held importance to him.

Lifting her with one arm with ease, the mobster carefully moved her to the middle of their bed, hovering above her and watching her pretty face with a loving gaze. “You’re my everything,” he dared to whisper. “You both are.” He felt her hands cupping his face tenderly as if he wasn’t the killer everyone feared across the East Coast as if he was something precious even though he was broken beyond repair. “And you are ours, Bucky.” She kissed his cheeks, the tip of his nose, his lips, and his left shoulder without disgust, without apprehension, but with deeply felt love.

As if he was perfect the way he was.

The fifth incident that proved him to have chosen wisely when following his heart for the first time in his life was after a business trip to Sicily that had taken too long for his liking, even though the business was good and the newly knitted connections invaluable. But it had made him leave his family for far too long than humanly tolerable, not even the many FaceTime calls had eased the sting in his heart.

“Make sure Enzo receives the gift for his wife and put a little something for him inside as well. Perhaps the Yamazaki Single Malt?” The 55-year-old whisky sure would make a fine gift for the young leader of the Sicilian Mafia, remembering an evening here and there when both men had shared a glass of scotch.

Steve walked beside him as they left the car and made their way over the sidewalk and behind the gate of the old brownstone in the best area in New York City. The cherry trees along the road were in full bloom, and the spring breeze was pleasant enough that the Barnes considered taking them all out for a day in Central Park. Work could wait after two weeks away from them. “Sure thing, Buck. I’ll call Stark to get a bottle,” the blond nodded and opened the door for his boss after walking up the stairs before entering the family home as well, happy sounds wafting through the air already.

Bucky visibly relaxed when he heard his family without a phone between them and handed Steve the concealed guns. They had made a rule for the house, and everyone obliged happily because everyone had been wrapped around their little fingers since the day they were born.

And no one would dare to go against Mrs. Barnes.

“I don’t want to be disturbed for the next couple of weeks, so handle everything and only bother me with situations that need my explicit attention,” was the last order the mobster could get out before the sound of small feet erupted from the living room and barreling toward the foyer.

“Papa!”

“Dada! No, waits for meeee! Annie, pwease! Mommyyyy!”

Bucky laughed as his eldest rounded the corner in full sprint, her little legs carrying her as fast they could, and the tall brunet crouched down to catch her little body. The little girl, resembling so much his wife, looked at his face with bright eyes, hands pressing against his cheeks and squishing them with an adorable chuckle.

“Привет, папочка,” she greeted him shyly, stumbling over her sounds and pronunciations, but Bucky kissed her little cheeks with such enthusiasm that her insecurities vanished in an instant. “Привет, солнышко,” the father returned with a kiss to her forehead and watched the questioning expression morphing onto his daughter’s face. Her tongue poked out between her lips, eyes wandering to the ceiling, brows drawn together in concentration—just like his wife. But then, she looked at him again, leaning closer as if she wanted to conspire with him. “What does that mean, papa? Yelena didn’t teach me that word yet,” she whispered, and Bucky laughed again, feeling almost crushed by the happiness he felt at that moment. “It means sunshine, my sunshine.” It made her smile as brightly as the sun outside the windows before she waved at Steve. “Hi, Uncle Stevie. You can go now. Papa is mine; you can have him back in… a long time.”

Nodding to underline her case, the almost six-year-old looked expectantly at his second in command, and Bucky turned with her still in his arms, looking just as expectantly as her. “You heard the little lady, Steve. Off you go,” he teased, and the blond shook his head with a smile, bowing before them. “As you wish, Princess Anastasia.” The girl huffed and showed the blond giant her tongue. “It’s Anya, Uncle Stevie! You always forget!” Chuckling, Steve took her hand and shook it apologetically. “You are right; my apologies, princess. Enjoy your time with your father.”

And with that, he left for his office, leaving the two in the foyer when they heard another set of steps.

“Anya, next time, wait for your brother, please,” Mrs. Barnes scolded the little girl gently, a smile on her lips and the little boy on her arm. His son nodded, holding his stuffed bunny at its long ears. “Yesh, waits for me, Annie! Dada!” More excitement echoed through the home as the small boy started to wiggle in her arms, and Bucky rushed over to her, catching Elijah before he could plop out of her embrace. “Careful, little troublemaker,” he laughed and held him with his other arm, hearing Anya scoff quietly. He threw his wife a questioning look, and in return, she only rolled her eyes at their children, softly shaking her head and taking Anya to her.

“They had a… falling out earlier.” Anya scoffed again as if her mother understated the entire ordeal, wanting to be put back on her feet, and hugged her mother’s hips closely. Elijah leaned his head against Bucky’s shoulder, bunny pressed tightly into his chest, watching his sister. “He ruined my homework! Miss Pepper said she’s suuuuuper excited for my solar system model, and then, papa, Eli just banged his stupid bunny on it!” Angry tears gathered in her eyes, almost rolling down her pretty face. His youngest looked positively undisturbed as he watched his sister unraveling over her homework, and Bucky sighed.

“Bunny s’not shtupid. Annie’s plant-… plants-… planets! Annie’s planets looks ugly, dada. Not pretty like mommy,” Elijah stated with confidence, making the tears finally spill over Anya’s cheeks. “I hate you! You’re not my little brother anymore!” And with that, the little girl pulled away from the soothing hands of her mother, almost tumbling over the stairs as she ran upstairs, a loud bang echoing through the house when she closed her door with force.

Another sigh escaped Bucky and his wife alike, both parents looking down at their little boy who started to chew on his bunny’s ear. “Honey, that wasn’t very nice to say,” she reprimanded her son and took him from Bucky when he stretched his little chubby arms toward his mother, keeping a hand on his little back. “Annie is sads?” She nodded and kissed the dark mob of hair her son had inherited from his father, just like the blue of his eyes. “She’s upset, baby, yes. We will give her a moment to calm down before we’re going upstairs to apologize, yes?”

Elijah nodded with tears in his eyes, and the father couldn’t hold back, so he gently cupped his youngest head and pressed a lingering kiss onto the wild dark curls. “Can me and bunny asks Miss Melina fors cookies?” Smiling, she pressed a kiss to his cheek before putting him onto his small feet. “But only one, baby!” He was already on his way, chanting for cookies.

In an instant, Bucky pulled his wife into his arms, capturing her lips with his, a rumbling moan escaping him at the taste and feel of her. “Two fucking weeks are too long, malyshka,” he stated with another lingering kiss, fingers tangled in her hair. “Tell me about it. Try to manage two kids who switch between being the bestes of friends and each other’s enemy number one multiple times a day.” Taking her in more closely, Bucky could see the dark circles under her eyes and the tight muscles around her lips. His thumb swept across the dark circles, and his lips followed to kiss them better. “I’m so sorry, milaya,” he murmured with another kiss to her forehead and felt her hand hitting him against the back of his head. “Don’t be ridiculous. You had to be there, and we had to stay here with school for Anya and Eli’s first day at kindergarten. We managed. I wouldn’t mind if you take over bedtime duty for a while, though.”

Bucky grinned happily at the prospect of spending time with his kids, feeling the love only a father could feel coursing through his body. “Of course, love. We’ll get you something nice on our stroll over Fifth and let the kids play in Central Park while you enjoy a book, alright? I’ll pick up a few new bedtime stories as well, so you will not even be remotely needed and can enjoy bath after bath. Would that make my wife happy?” Sighing, she leaned heavily against him, gathering strength through his strong body supporting the weight resting on her shoulders during the worst and most exhausting days—which they have had many in the past two weeks. “Sounds lovely. But don’t you dare spend a fortune on me again!” Her warning was unnecessary because Bucky would spend a fortune on his wonderful wife, and she knew that as well. “Please,” he chuckled and pressed another heated kiss to her lips, his fingers cupping her chin tenderly. “I’ll buy whatever you want, milaya. Perhaps we could even get something for us.”

He loved his wife in pretty clothes, but he loved her especially dearly in pretty lingerie he had no qualm of ripping off her gorgeous body the second she’d appear before him, reducing the masterfully crafted pieces to lacy shreds on their bedroom floor. The first time he did that, he hadn’t gotten the opportunity to pull her to bed, receiving a scolding he had gotten the last time, probably as a boy. She had been royally pissed at his antics, mourning the pretty set she had bought for their first night together. The next day, she received a delivery of all the pieces she had eyed at the shops and saved online, making her closet filled with more lingerie than a regular woman would need in her entire life.

Only that she wasn’t a regular woman with a regular man. He could buy her anything and in any quantity possible, so he wasn’t one to hold back when the urge to see this goddess of a woman naked made him growl and impatient—and even a tad jealous of the fabric touching her skin instead of his hands and lips.

“You are the worst of the bunch, Barnes. Seriously.” Exasperated, she looked up at him, her cheeks warming under his touch, and Bucky nodded with a serious expression. “I am insatiable when it comes to you, malyshka. And you thrive on the power you have over me.” Eye-rolling, she shook her head again, winding out of his arms and smacking his ass with a teasing smile. “Stop being a seventeen year old horndog and move your sexy backside up to your daughter. She’ll listen to you more than me after two weeks filled with my constant presence. I’ll see what I can save from her project, and stopping Elijah from munching on too many cookies…”

The last part was barely a mumble, already distracted by whatever thought wandered through her beautiful mind, and Bucky watched her retreating back with a smile before shrugging out of his suit jacket. Throwing it over the stair railing, he made his way to his eldest’s room, softly knocking at the door littered with pictures and posters of her favorite animals and characters—he could even see the remnants of a glitter pen—and knew how lucky he could count himself when he was allowed to enter his sunshine’s room.

He had the perfect wife, two healthy, wonderful children, and had found happiness despite the way his life had taken.

He had indeed chosen wisely.

author's note: Tysm for reading my silly little writing. As usual: likes, reblogs, and comments are so much appreciated! I love to read your thoughts <3

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x reader fluff #bucky barnes x f!reader #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes fluff #mob boss!bucky #mob!bucky x reader #mob!bucky #mob bucky #mob au #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky x reader #bucky x female reader #bucky x f!reader #bucky fluff #mobster bucky

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azullumi · 9 months ago

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JESUS, TAKE THE WHEEL ?!

premise — to put it simply, hsr men driving. characters — boothill, sunday, aventurine, veritas ratio, jing yuan, and blade content tags — small mentions of reader, probably fluff, not proofread, i don't know how to tag this please | wc: 0.6k ; headcanons

note from me — this idea was brought to me after nearly crashing and getting multiple heart attacks while my dad was driving

BOOTHILL, races with the wind that it feels like you left your soul somewhere in the road—literally a wild spirit who seems to enjoy the feeling of the breeze on his skin. He probably got you lost one time too, or maybe twice, or thrice. He just loves fast cars and faster chases, likes the thrill of it (much to your dismay if you’re a cautious person). He’s probably cussed someone out for cutting him off his lane which led to him nearly crashing when he pressed the brakes suddenly. Despite his reckless driving habits, his quick thinking and reflexes keeps him out of harm.

SUNDAY, perfect law-abiding citizen—follows the traffic rules, doesn’t go past the speed limit, never crashes, never gets pulled over, you’re in the safest hands and you can trust the entirety of your life on him. You have a good road trip, a great driver, and someone who you can easily talk to. It’s perfect. He probably has a playlist ready with the most of it being his sister’s songs, playing and listening to it as he drives, often humming along with the melody.

AVENTURINE, drives like there’s no tomorrow when he’s alone but drives like the most responsible and careful driver whenever there’s someone with him in the car. He likes driving during the night despite the risk of it (and that’s honestly the point); he does love the quiet streets and the solitude he gets, taking long drives to often clear his mind or just drive somewhere where he wants to be, often taking the scenic route. There are times that he drives in complete silence, deep in thought, and taking random turns.

VERITAS RATIO, just your normal and average sane driver. Literally it’s all just normal with him that it feels so wrong. He’s quite the careful driver but is easily annoyed when someone cuts off his lane and you’ll have to deal with a rambling doctor that calls people who have no driving etiquettes foolish and reckless. He strictly follows the rules of the road, but doesn’t hesitate in voicing out his frustrations at those who don’t. Other than that, everything is fine. He rarely listens to music, however, opting to listen to educational podcasts or the radio instead—he says it helps in keeping him focused.

JING YUAN, bold of you to even assume he’s driving; he doesn’t drive, or he rarely does. He’s a passenger princess, a shotgun queen, the backseat sleeper,—preferring to sleep on his seat than focus his eyes on the road. If he ever drives, however, it’s slow and careful. He’ll reason that there’s nothing to rush for and that you all have the time in the world, and you don’t know if you’re supposed to accept his reasoning, especially when you’re going to be late. The chance of him falling asleep while driving is higher than the chance of arriving at your destination early (a 10-minute drive easily becomes a 30-minute one and no, it’s not because of the traffic).

BLADE, believe it or not but he’s, if not the most, but one of the trusted drivers. While he does go past the speed limit sometimes and maybe he does have to swerve the car that you’ll fly off your seat (if not without your seatbelt) ever so often, you never die while he’s the one on the driver seat—thankfully. Surprisingly, he does wear his seatbelt and even urges you to wear yours (even if he didn’t, you’ll have to because you have nothing else to hold on to). The most silent car ride to ever exist though as he’ll only speak when you’ll ask him something, otherwise you’re left on your own with a conversation in the wind. Nevertheless, you’ll arrive at your destination in one piece. Not until the mara strikes.

FELIIII, a lovely mention to the beautiful and lovely @dr-felitas !! i'm getting back to writing now since i'm back from vacation (which means i can do anything and everything i want, but not including ghosting 🔥) ANYWAYS i would like to say thank you for always being patient with me and my replies ,, like my bad g 🙏 i really appreciate your presence in my life and your constant understanding, and i know i already told you this but you're a very warm and comforting person and i only hope for the best things to come in your life (i know love and beauty exists because you exist and you're full of it). i will support you in each and every one of your decisions, despite how bad or stupid it can be. don't let anything hold you back boo, never listen to your haters or your opps 🗣, you're still young and you have all the time in the world to experience meaningful moments (even heartbreaking ones). so go talk to that girl bae <33 no matter what happens, i'll always be here for you. ily lots mwaaaa

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myonexox · 1 month ago

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DADDY ISSUES

pairing : boyfriend!jay x female!reader

genre : fluff, slight angst

synopsis : you have daddy issues

word count : 0.7k

it was late at night when you found yourself sitting on the windowsill of your small apartment, staring out at the glowing city lights. the hum of cars could still be heard but your thoughts drowned out all external noise. you had always felt like an outsider in your own world, carrying the weight of emotions you couldn't fully understand, emotions rooted in years of craving a love you never received.

your relationship with your father had always been... complicated. he was present but absent, if that made any sense. he provided the essentials but never the affection, the warmth or the validation you desperately sought. you grew up learning that men left, emotionally if not physically. it shaped how you saw the world, how you saw yourself.

then came jay.

you hadn’t expected much when you first met him. in fact, you actively resisted the idea of letting him in. he was too charming, too persistent, too... perfect. surely, he had to be pretending. men like him didn’t exist, not in your world. but jay had a way of peeling back your defenses without you even realizing it.

“you’re thinking too much again” jay’s voice broke through your haze. you turned to see him standing in the doorway with his hands stuffed into the pockets of his black hoodie. his dark eyes studied you with a mixture of concern and affection.

you shrugged. “just... thinking”

he walked over and settled himself next to you on the windowsill. “about?” he asked gently.

you hesitated. it wasn’t easy for you to open up, even to him. especially to him.

“stuff” you muttered, your eyes fixed on the twinkling lights outside.

he chuckled softly. “you always say that. ‘stuff.’ you know you can talk to me, right?”

“i know” and you did. but knowing and doing were two different things.

for a moment, there was silence. jay didn’t push, didn’t prod. he just waited, giving you the space to decide whether you want to tell him or not. it was one of the things you admired about him. his patience and his understanding.

finally, you sighed. “it’s about my dad”

he nodded, his expression softening. “hm, what about him?”

“i don’t know” you admitted, your voice tinged with frustration. “i just... i feel like he’s this shadow that’s always there, even when he’s not. i don't know how to explain. like, no matter what i do, i can’t shake it. i can’t shake him. do you get it?”

he reached out and took your hand in his, his thumb brushing over your knuckles. “you don’t have to shake it. you’re not broken because of him. you’re... you. and that’s enough”

you looked at him, your heart twisting. how could he say things like that so easily, so sincerely? how could he look at you like you were the most beautiful, valuable thing in the world when you couldn’t even see yourself that way?

“how do you do that?” you whispered.

“do what?”

“make me feel like... like i’m not a mess”

he smiled softly. “because you’re not a mess. you’re human. and humans are complicated and beautiful and imperfect. but that’s what makes you, you”

your throat tightened and you looked away, blinking rapidly. you hated crying in front of people but with jay, it always felt safe. like, you could say or tell or do whatever you want without being judged. like it was okay to feel vulnerable, to cry and to ask for support, for help when you really need it. he made you feel that way, for the first time in your life.

“you’re too good to me, you know?” you murmured.

his grip on your hand tightened slightly, his tone serious. “no, i'm not. you just haven’t had enough people treat you the way you deserve. but now i'm here, i’m not going anywhere, okay? i'll always be here with you”

a tear slipped down your cheek and you let out a shaky laugh. “you say that now but what if i scare you away?”

“you won’t” he said firmly. “i’m not afraid of you or your past or your scars. i love you, all of you. even the parts you think are unlovable”

the words hit you like a tidal wave, overwhelming and freeing all at once. you leaned into him, resting your head on his shoulder. he wrapped an arm around you, holding you close as if to shield you from the world.

for the first time, you felt something you thought was impossible, peace.

yeah, maybe healing wasn’t about fixing everything. maybe it was about finding someone who loved you through the mess, someone who showed you that you were worth loving. and you knew you had found that someone in him.

#enhypen #enhypen jay #enhypen jay oneshot #enhypen oneshot #enhypen x reader #jay x reader #daddy issues

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mononijikayu · 2 months ago

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"babe the sun dress" — fushiguro toji.

GENRE: canon convergence; smut with minor plot;

WARNING/S: smut, romance, marriage, nsfw, rated 18 and above, explicit content, kissing, rough sex, p to v sex, car sex, orgasm, breast, humor, profanity, pet names (babe, etc), characters speaking in sexual innuendo, mention of sexual euphemisms, depiction of explicit sexual content, short cause i wanted to today, i guess.;

WORD COUNT: 1.7k words.

NOTE: i don't know what possessed me but i guess you'll have this right now. i wanted to write longer but im a bit preoccupied. but i zoned out and then went, 'toji would like sun dress on a woman actually' and just sat down to write it within the hour. and then i ended up writing other stuff too. anyway, i hope you enjoy this even if its short!!! i love you all <3

masterlist

if you want to, tip! <3

when it came to toji, you always felt like losing was inevitable. you weren't strong enough when it comes to him. he was too good—too good with his hands, too good with his lips, and far too good with his tongue.

he was just too much of a minx when it comes to making you feel like you were seeing stars. and so, he had a way of making you feel like nothing else in the world existed but him and the way he moved.

now here you were, pressed against the seat of the car, his weight heavy on top of you. you groan against his touch, feeling his fingers deepen against your thighs. your husband gets like this sometimes, well maybe more often than he thinks.

he gets easily needy for you, for your body, for your moans, your pleasure. that's just how it was since you both started doing it. and when it starts, there's nothing that can end it. he has to cum inside of you or he'll lose it.

his neediness had been palpable the moment he saw you in that new sun dress. you were shy about it, you wanted to show off this new sun dress to him. it was getting warmer now that it was summer and since you've gotten rid of old clothes, you needed new ones.

when you got out there, striking a pose, he was just staring. it was too late for you to notice the way his eyes darkened, his jaw tensed, the way he was rubbing his thighs up and down, as though trying to calm himself down.

it was all the warning you got before he quickly paid at the counter before pulling you all the way through the mall and led you into the back seat of the car, the empty parking lot offering no witnesses to the chaos he unleashed.

almost immediately, the car windows fogged as his hands roamed, his lips marking a trail that made you shiver. his breath was hot against your ear, and the low growl of his voice sent a thrill straight through you.

every touch, every kiss, every movement—your dear insatiable husband toji knew exactly how to drive you over the edge. and just as easily, you felt consumed, overwhelmed, and yet, you never wanted him to stop.

you cried out, your voice breaking into the heated air as he thrust in and out, hitting that perfect spot with precision that made your head spin. the fabric of the sundress blossoming up and down against each and every push in and out, your panties off rising up and down with the shaking of your body against his own.

your breasts were dangling out, with the sheer force of the rhythm. it was relentless, pulling you closer to the edge with every movement. toji felt so big, he was filling you up so good and he wasn't even completely inside.

the car windows were completely fogged now, a blurry haze from the heat radiating off your bodies and the gasps that fell from your lips, over and over again.

each exhale only added to the steamy cocoon enclosing the two of you. soon enough, your fingers, trying to cling to something, were tracing against the car window, traces clearing the fog away.

for a fleeting moment of clarity, your mind wandered outside the car, realizing how obvious it must look. the unmistakable rocking of the vehicle, the occasional squeak of the suspension—it was impossible not to notice.

anyone passing by could tell exactly what was happening, but the thrill of it only heightened the moment. and you knew you should care, but with the way his hands gripped your thighs and his lips brushed against your neck, all reason dissolved into nothing but the intoxicating need he fueled in you.

your husband's movements slowed for a moment, just enough to draw a shaky breath from your lips. his deep sensual voice, rough and low, broke through the haze. he presses a kiss against your jaw, the heat permeating from that one touch.

“this is your fault, you know.” he murmured, his lips brushing against your ear, sending shivers down your spine.

you barely managed a coherent thought, let alone words. “m-my fault? you.....ohhhhh, you, you couldn't keep it in your pants!”

he chuckled darkly, the sound vibrating through you. “that little sun dress, babe.” he said, his hands trailing possessively down your sides. “you wore it knowing exactly what it would do to me, don't you?”

your breath hitched as he resumed his pace, slow but deliberate, each thrust leaving you trembling and shaking against his body. “i didn’t—” you started, but he cut you off with a smirk.

“don’t even try to deny it, babe.” he growled, his teeth grazing the sensitive skin of your neck. “you knew i wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off you. wearing that, looking like that—you wanted this.”

his words sent a scarlet flush of heat through you, his accusation both thrilling and maddening. “maybe i did.” you managed to whisper, your voice trembling. "what...what are you gonna do about it?"

toji grinned against your skin, his lips curling into a wicked, triumphant smirk as he pressed a hard, passionate kiss to your collarbone.

“this.” he muttered, voice thick with desire, his pace quickening, each thrust leaving you utterly breathless, your protests swallowed by the pleasure overwhelming you.

you cried out loud, your body arching into him, every nerve ablaze as he pushed you closer to the edge. the way he moved, relentless and consuming, left you incapable of forming a coherent thought, let alone fighting the sensations he was so expertly feeding you.

“my little vixen of a wife, huh?” he rasped, his breath hot against your ear, the teasing edge in his voice sending another jolt of heat through you. his words, possessive and dripping with admiration, only added fuel to the fire, making your head spin even faster.

his grip on you tightened as his lips grazed your neck, marking you with a trail of heat that burned into your skin. “you drive me crazy, babe.” he growled, his voice low and rough. “every. single. time.”

you could only whimper in response, his pace unrelenting, every movement pulling you further under his intoxicating spell. drool was falling from your lips, your head was spinning. the pleasure coils on your belly.

and then he shifted, trying to push even deeper, his hands gripping your hips with a firm, possessive strength. a low growl escaped his throat as he finally sank all the way in, to the hilt. it all felt so good, to be full and to fill.

your body reacted instantly, a jolt of shock and pleasure coursing through you. your breath hitched, and a broken moan spilled from your lips as your walls pulsed around him, clenching instinctively and enveloping him completely.

“damn, babe.” he hissed through gritted teeth, his head dropping to your shoulder as he fought to catch his breath. “you’re... squeezing me so tight.”

your hands clutched at him, nails digging into his back as the overwhelming sensation held you in its grip. he didn’t move for a moment, letting you adjust, his chest rising and falling heavily against yours.

his movements grew rougher, more erratic, as his grip on your hips tightened. You could feel the tension coiling within him, his breathing uneven and heavy against your neck.

“ah fuck, fuck.” he growled, his voice low and guttural, as if he were barely holding himself together. “you feel too good... i can’t—”

you moaned his name, the sound broken and breathless as he thrust deeper, each movement dragging you closer to the brink. his pace faltered for just a moment, his body trembling with restraint before he gave in completely.

with a sharp groan, he buried himself fully, his body shuddering against yours as he released inside you. the heat of it spread, leaving you gasping as the intensity of the moment crashed over both of you.

"the...the car seats, toji." you murmur under your breath, still full of pleasure high. "they'll...they'll....ah..."

it did in fact stain, dripping against the leather little by little. he sighed, looking at it. he stayed like that for a beat, his head dropping to your shoulder, his breath hot and ragged against your skin.

“bound to happen, babe.” he murmured, his voice softer now, almost teasing. “wearing that damn sun dress... why wouldn't this happen?”

you couldn’t help but laugh weakly, your body still trembling beneath him. he presses a kiss against your temple, shifting you to a more comfortable position. he still refuses to let himself off you, though.

“guess i’ll have to be more careful next time.” you whispered, though the smirk tugging at your lips said otherwise.

he leaned back just enough to look at you, his eyes dark and glinting with satisfaction. you knew that look in his eyes. the wolf was hungry and he still wants more. you sighed, leaning against his chest.

"you really want to do more here?"

"it’s not like they’ll care, babe." he snickers, his voice dripping with mischief as the emptiness of the parking lot seems to agree with him.

his palm finds its way to one of your breasts, cradling it with just the right amount of pressure, his thumb teasing over sensitive skin. your full pinkish lips part involuntarily, a soft echo of pleasure spilling from them.

“’sides, babe.” he murmurs, his grin widening at you. “need to make more memories with this sundress, babe. it looks way too good not to be ruined.”

you roll your eyes at him, but the smile tugging at your lips betrays you. biting down on your lip to stifle a laugh, you meet his gaze, a playful glint in your eyes. “is that so?”

“oh, it is, babe.” he smirks, leaning in close, his breath brushing over your ear as his fingers trail down the fabric. “by the time i’m done with you, every time you see it, you’ll think of me.”

"you're too much."

"speak for yourself." he says, biting your shoulder, causing you to moan.

by the time he was satisfied, you don't think you could wear the sun dress anymore.

the next few days, toji ran errands and bought you another one.

but of course, knowing your husband, you'll have to buy another one.

you started to take notes not to wear sun dresses.

this however does not stop your insatiable husband.

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mirohlayo · 1 year ago

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CUTE, PRETTY AND PERFECT

( lando was ready to confess his feelings to you, but a misunderstanding changed everything. )

warning : fluff, so much fluff, lando being adorable

note : i want this boy guys. also probably my fav fic, it's just all cute omgg

word count : 3k

He was finally ready. He had finally gathered all his courage. Sure, he was stressed, but after months of hiding his deep feelings, he was determined to do it. Lando was ready to confess his feelings to you.

McLaren and their two drivers are now in Bahrain to test the cars for the pre-season. It starts in few days but they already started to work hard, especially on their new garage design.

As a friend of Lando Norris himself, he bought you a ticket plane for you to fly to Bahrain and spend some time with him, even though it was not the most exciting thing because you would just be around the paddock and the track, not doing anything special or funny. But still, you agreed to come because you couldn't spend a lot of time with him during the winter break. Turns out this man had fun traveling around the world.

But Lando had others plans. Of course, he dragged you and his others friends there to spend time with you, but he also wanted to do something. He thought about it a lot, also stressed about it a lot, but now he knows he's more than ready to confess to you.

This boy was already absolutely obsessed with you since the first time you met. Your smile, your laugh, your shyness... Every single thing you do only makes the situation worse and he feels himself falling more and more.

He's the type of guy to be confident to pick up girls and he has no problem to go for them. He is confident and shows no signs of weakness. If he likes a girl then he won't hesitate to show it to her. But with you it's totally different.

The so confident and flirty Lando finds himself so weak when it comes to you. His usual way of flirting no longer exists when he's with you. And you're the only girl he's ever met who makes him change his behavior like that. He is extremely shy around you. He's hesitant, he doesn't know if he's doing the right thing because he's too nervous about making you uncomfortable.

He is also no longer touchy at all. Usually he likes to be tactile with the girl he likes, but you are completely different. You have such an effect on him that he becomes clumsy. This is why when you touch each other suddenly, even for a short second, his whole being becomes alarmed. He blushes so quickly and hard, his heart beats so hard that he's sure we can hear it on the other side of the world.

Even his friends don't recognize him when he's with you. This is the first time he's been so shy and cautious with a girl.

This is why it was at first hard for him to get the guts to finally confess to you. But it's soon the start of the new season, so he thought confessing now would be a great idea. Because then if you reject him he'll be able focus on the races and get over it faster.

And the day finally comes. He starts to feel stressed. His heart is beating a miles but he tries to ignore it. He knows you're here, around the paddock, so he goes to looking for you. His thoughts have been the same for a few days: he hopes that you love him in return. He already spent five minutes looking for you, but it looks like you're missing. He was about to take the stairs to leave the McLaren building when he heard several voices coming from a room.

He cautiously approaches where the noise is coming from, and then presses his ear to the door. He listens carefully, and now he's hearing two voices. And he's sure your voice is one of the two. He would recognize it in seconds. He perfectly knows how your voice sounds. But soon the conversation you have with your interlocutor is breaking his heart in pieces.

"I already love him. God he's so cute !" You say in a excited way. He hears a girl's laughter. "Y/N, you haven't gone out with him yet." "I know but i can't wait. I think i'll go out with him in like two days or something like that" You reply.

Lando's heart misses a beat. Are you planning to leave him alone for another boy ? Are you serious ? Do you actually hate spending time with Lando ? He keeps listening, but he can't repress this feeling of pain.

"You're already in love with him right ?" The girl ask you. "Oh definitely. He's perfect. And he's so pretty too, look at him !" He assumes that you are showing a photo of this man to your friend, since there is a short moment of silence before you giggle. "Yeah, he's cute. I'm so happy for you Y/N" "I love him so much you know..." You keep saying.

That's enough for Lando. He doesn't know if he feels angry or sad right now, but he doesn't wait another second to leave the place, his breath heavy and jerky. So he spent all those months being so in love with you just to find out you're head over heels for another man ?

Jealousy runs in his blood. His feelings were always so deep and strong when it comes to you, so this jealousy is obviously hurting him. It breaks him, and his heart. His mind can't think properly. He wanted to confess to you, but your plan was to leave Bahrain and him in few days to go out with a man he doesn't know about his existence.

But he knows he can't blame you. After all, we don't decide who we want to love. Feelings can't be controlled. He fell so hard in love with you and it's not his fault, so he can't blame you for loving someone else. It's your feelings. But still, he's so in pain. The sadness is quickly taking hold of him. Because he realizes you won't be his girlfriend. And it sucks.

It's been two hours since he found out. He didn't want to think about this horrible new, so instead he went over his race team and started to work on the cars with the engineers. But his mind keeps playing again and again your so affectionate words that you said about this man he already hates with all his being.

He's talking with Oscar about the cars' grip when he hears a voice behind him. "Hello guys !". You walk over and you're now standing in front of the two drivers. Oscar greets you with a smile. "Y/N, it's good to see you here. I guess you missed Lando" the Australian grins at you, and gives his teammate a blow in the ribs.

But he doesn't move, and keeps a straight face. "I wanted to spend time with him but turns out he worked hard with you these two past hours. You steal him and our precious time." You points out to Oscar to tease him and he leaves his hands in the air, ridding himself of any accusation.

You feel Lando stiffen and he doesn't even dare to look at you. His jaw tenses and his arms are crossed over his chest. You frown. What's wrong with him ? "You prefer spending time with your so cute and perfect man huh..." He rumbled in such a low voice that you didn't understand what he just said. "What did you say ?" "Nothing. Just leave me alone, I am working" He turns back and walk away, leaving you alone with the aussie next to you.

You're so confused. Why he's like that ? Did you do something wrong ? Do you bothered him or what ? You send a look of confusion to the blonde guy next to you, and he too seems lost. He shrugs. "I don't know why his behavior is so aggressive towards you. When he arrived two hours ago, he didn't say a word and he seemed quite angry."

"Angry ?" "Yeah, well he wasn't too focused and sometimes I felt like he was about to cry". This is insane. You don't know what happened to him but it worries you. He was always so kind and caring with you, never getting angry at you. But it's so different today. It feels like he hates you.

Oscar pats your shoulder, gives you a small smile before leaving you here, thinking about everything that happened during those 2 hours.

He felt guilty. So guilty. Of course, it was the first time that he get angry at you. He was always trying his best to give you the best of himself but that day it wasn't the case. After speaking to you for the last time, it got worse. He couldn't stop thinking about what he told you. It was stupid of him.

But today was also not the day too. He's been ignoring you for two days now. He passed you a few times around the paddock but he always looked away quickly. He didn't really want to spend time with you anymore. And that got on your nerves.

He remembered that today you have to leave Bahrain and him to go out on a date with your man. Maybe your boyfriend even ? But you didn't warn him, so he wonders if you're really gone. Despite this thought, he didn't try to ask you and just figured you left without telling anyone. But as he walks towards the mclaren garage, your voice come from behind him. "Lando, wait !!"

He frozens. Are you really here ? His heart starts to beat faster and he turns around to see if you are there. His eyes dart out when he finds you standing here, in front of him. You look like you ran a marathon because of your messy hair on your face and your red cheeks. He clears his throat and tries to put himself together. "Are you... okay ?" You ask carefully. He seems surprised at first, but quickly get back to his straight face.

"Yes, I'm good." You feel like he was lying. "It doesn't look like though" His gaze shifts to the right. He avoids your gaze. "Why ?" He asks. "I don't know... You've been ignoring me for two days. You haven't spoken to me once since you asked me to leave you alone. I don't know if I did something wrong but I need to know Lando..." Your voice is about to crack and he notices it. He realizes he must had pain you. And it breaks him in pieces.

But he avoids whatever you're saying. "And you ?" His question make you lift your head up to cross his eyes. "Why are you still here ? You should be with your boyfriend on your date right now." He looks down at the floor, because now sadness and pain fill his whole heart. "What boyfriend ?"

Your question and your confused tone surprise him. His head lift up and for a moment your eyes meet, confusion can be read in both of your looks. No. He's sure he heard it right last time. "I heard you say you were going out on a date with a man today" You frown. "I don't have anything planned today. I don't even have a boyfriend or a man, Lan" You don't know where that comes from but it's just stupid. You are single, and if you should have a boyfriend of course you would choose Lando without hesitation.

After all, you fell in love with him too.

He's relieved. His heart slows down and he finally manages to relax. Now his whole being is relieved because it means he still has a chance to confess to you. "I know it's bad Y/N, but last time I listened to your conversation with your friend and you talked about a perfect and super handsome guy, who you were planning to go on a date with..." You were about to say something but he cuts you off. "So i thought you had someone you loved." His voice becomes quieter.

But now you understand. You start to laugh because you realized that he misunderstood everything. He looks at you, confused. "Lando, that day I wasn't talking about a human. But about a puppy. I'm going to adopt a puppy" You say between two laughters. His eyes dart out and his face looks so surprised.

Oh poor boy. He feels so dumb and stupid right now. How could he make such a fool of himself and distort your words? He has misunderstood every single word you said. And he feels even more foolish when he realized he was so fucking jealous of a puppy. A little puppy.

He blushes so hard now. Such a blushing mess. Not just his cheeks but his whole face is all reddish now, shame eats away at him. It's so embarrassing. But your cute laugh soothes him a bit. "Today was the day I had to pick him up and "go out" with him. But I was worried about you so I postponed the meeting" You explain and he feels even more embarrassed.

"I'm so sorry Y/N. No really, i misunderstood everything and i apologize for that. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have ignore you. I'm so stupid" He doesn't stop rumbling and apologizing for all this stuff he created. "Hey Lando, it's okay. I am not mad at you. You didn't have the context so there's no point in apologizing." You put your hands on his shoulders and the touch gives him goosebumps.

It's not fair how you manage to have a hold on him. He's so desperate for you. "But I'm really sorry..." You stay silent for a moment. "But it was really a problem if I went on this date with a man ?". Everything goes into panic inside him. He can't confess, not now. Not after what just happened. "N-no, you can have a boyfriend and go out with whoever you want but... I mean, it's..."

He sighs and pulls backward. "Sorry. It's just that... I don't know how to forgive myself" he reveals. He nervously plays with his fingers and you can't stand this sad picture of Lando. That's why you got an idea. You smile to him. "Maybe you could come with me to pick up my puppy?" A grin takes place on your face.

And soon a grin comes out from his face too. He can't stop smiling like a child. "I'd love to".

"You can come". The old lady waves at you and the driver. You get up from your seats and enter the room where several puppies are playing around. You can't help but giggle. You love so much puppies and dogs. And so does Lando. He too looks in heaven. "Here's your little puppy." The lady hands you a cute brown puppy with big doe eyes.

You take him in your arms and without waiting another second, you attack him with kisses. You let out in between some giggles, while Lando stands there, looking at you with heart-eyes. But the more he looks at you and the puppy, the more he got jealous.

You kiss and hug the puppy like there's only you two in the room. All your attention is on the cute brown animal in your arms and you don't even look at the driver anymore.

Twice. It's the second time he got so jealous of a damn puppy. "What's wrong with me ?" he thought. But he can't help it. He desperately wants to be the puppy. To be the one who receives your kisses, your hugs, your attention. It's not fair. "You want to hold him ? I need to get the papers and stuff done" you ask to him and then right after he got the fluffy ball in his big arms.

Lando also has a dog. Of course he loves animals too. But here it's different. With a smile, you encourage him to wait for you outside while you finish to sign the papers for the adoption. So he waits some minutes, staring at the puppy. Or more like glaring at him. "You love stealing my girl from me huh ?" He asks to the fluffy ball, and he looks like he's about to pout.

But then you appear, a big smile on your face. You join Lando, too happy to notice the cute pout on his face. "Oh my baby, you're so cute" You take the little puppy back in your arms and kiss him again. "And me ?" Lando suddenly said softly, but you heard him.

"You ?" You ask surprised. Why he's suddenly like that ? You look at him with with a questioning look. "Am I cute too ?" He asks, still pouting. He doesn't think about what he's saying anymore, now he just needs you. You don't know what to say. But indeed yeah, his cute behavior melts your heart. "Am I pretty and perfect too ? Arghh fuck !!" He lets out a cry of frustration. "I can't get jealous of a puppy, that's so childish"

"Lando, what are you saying ?" You don't understand at all his behavior. He sighs and finally meets your gaze. "What I'm trying to say is that I'm such a child to be jealous of a puppy. Like... Like I want to be him so bad. I also want your kisses, your cuddles, your attention. I also want to be the reason of your giggles. I so want to be this puppy to receive your love too" You bite back a smile, but that's impossible.

You take a step closer. "You're cute too. So cute. And you're such a pretty and perfect boy too Lan." You grin to him. He didn't expect that. At all. But it genuinely melts his heart. He looks at you with adoration now, and he needs to fight the urge to kiss you. "I guess my jealous boy wants his kiss huh ?" You tease him. He blushes hard, and like a cute puppy he nods quickly. You don't wait a second to press your lips on his ones.

He smiles against your lips, and deepen the kiss by pulling you closer to him. His arms hold you tight, but he makes sure he doesn't crush the puppy between you two. The kiss is so sweet, Lando is savoring every seconds of it. You pull back, and rest yours foreheads together. "I'm so in love with you Lando. Maybe I love you more than our puppy" You laugh softly. He smiles with all his teeth, and press a kiss on your cheek. "I hope so, baby. I'm already tired of him stealing my girl away from me".

You let out a laugh, and like that, he presses a cute and small kiss on the puppy. His beloved puppy.

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #lando norris x reader #lando norris x you #lando norris fluff #lando norris imagine #lando norris x y/n #ln4 imagine #ln4 x reader

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gguk-n · 5 months ago

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Last Straw (Lando Norris x Reader)

Thank you for the 400 followers. I love Lando but I felt like a bit of angst was needed.

Part 1 of Fading Shadow

Summary- Lando has been in a relationship for quite some time, most people didn't know that. Finally, the world finds out about Lando's girlfriend, he seems to forget about her.

Warning- Lando is a bit of an ass and the reader is a bit of a doormat

{Reader's POV}

Lando won the second race of his career and the season at Zandvoort, Max's home race. I was over the moon watching Lando cross the finish line. He was so happy to have won another race, finally. As he got out of the car he ran to his parents; after the greeting and congratulations, he walked away to be interviewed. I was stood there, dumb founded as Lando left without even acknowledging my existence; I could hear people whispering as Lando walked away

When we got back to the hotel, "Lan, do you wanna go out to celebrate?" I asked looking at him as he got ready for a shower. "Oh, Y/N, I made plans with the others; none of their girlfriends are coming. It'd be weird" he stated. "Oh, yeah, obviously. Well, I hope you have fun. I'll be here waiting for you" I said trying to give him a smile but I felt tears well up. Lando left soon after, while I was sat in the hotel scrolling through twitter when I saw something I wish I hadn't. I couldn't stop myself from reading through the tweets.

I could already imagine my friends screaming at me for staying after everything. It had always been like this, it always felt like Lando was too embarrassed to be seen with me. We started dating a year and a half back but we met 2 years back, when I was on a vacation with my friends. He was the best guy, or so I thought. We exchanged numbers and stayed in contact until he asked me out. It was straight out of a movie, the whole nine yards. But he wouldn't let me tell my friends, "baby come on, why do you wanna tell everyone and ruin the fun just yet. I like the thrill, isn't it fun trying to act like there's nothing between us" he said as he pushed me on my back on the sofa while his lips trailed the exposed skin on my torso; honestly I'd lose any train of thought once his lips were on my skin. Though I accidentally let it slip one day, they had been trying to get me to go on a blind date. So, I told them I was dating Lando Norris. They were so excited and wanted to meet him.

When Lando found out about that, he was furious and didn't speak to me for days. "HOW COULD YOU TELL THEM? AFTER ALL THE TIMES I TOLD YOU NOT TO....ARE YOU STUPID?" he shouted. "Lan, it was an honest mistake. They kept trying to set me up on a blind date and I didn't wanna go, obviously since I have you. Please, I'm sorry. I won't do anything stupid again. Please just join me for lunch on Sunday. I'm really sorry" I cried. "Then you should've gone on that stupid date" he spat as he walked away. I should've known then. It was only after I begged and pleaded that Lando agreed to meet my friends. He never let me forget how he did me a favour by agreeing to meet my friends. "baby, you know how much I love you right" he asked. "yeah" I replied as he intertwined his fingers with mine. "I can't share you with others. I get so jealous. You're mine and only mine. And that's why I can't have you meet my friends" he said as he started sucking on my neck.That's why I didn't bring up the fact that I hadn't met his friends since we'd known each other for a year and dating for half of it. We barely even went out on dates; we'd always have in home dates since he was a celebrity and didn't like the paps. He would always say that he enjoyed the normalcy and the feeling of being a regular guy with me. "Baby, do you really wanna go out, where we would be spotted and then people say stuff about us. Don't you like being home, wear whatever you want. I can touch you however I want. Come on, why do you wanna ruin something so perfect" he hummed against my lips as his fingers pushed my underwear aside. I was so naive and thought that he was such a romantic guy.

It a little before our 1 year anniversary when I started asking him to take me along to the races since I wanted to be there to support him in person. "Lan, I really wanna be there for your races. I wanna see my boyfriend being cool at what he does." I whined. "You already do see me on the teli, it's practically the same" he said. "Please Lan" I begged. "Baby, I love you I truly do and I wanna show you off to the world but you know how the fans can get, they ruined my last relationship and I can't lose you. I love you too much" he said making me blush. I believed him like the idiot that I was. I believed every lie that left his pretty lips even when he would say that all those pictures of him on twitter with girls were edited and that he would never do that to me. I believed him.

I don't know how much I begged to be at a race and when I got to go to the first race of my life with him as his girlfriend and of the season; I was ecstatic. I made sure to be dressed well so as to not embarrass Lando and made sure to be a little controlled in my movements even though I was super excited to be there since I loved Formula One. All the other drivers were pretty shocked to meet me and even more so when they found out we'd been dating. They were all very kind and so were their girlfriends. I thought we'd be the best of friends and I'd have someone to hang out with while my boyfriend raced. Oh how stupid I was, they never even told me that Lando cheated on me or that their boyfriends knew and they never told me. I had an inkling that Lando was cheating on me; I saw it with my own eyes on the night before my birthday; the day of the Miami GP and he was celebrating with everyone and I saw him kissing a girl. No one saw me because I left immediately and cried myself to sleep. I hated myself for never confronting Lando; I brushed it off thinking that if I tried harder Lando would be back to himself, the Lando I know. But the Lando I knew was a facade and never existed. Lando had only been playing with my heart, it seems.

Did I tell you? He forgot our anniversary and said he would make it up to me. Which I do not believe he has. "Fuck baby, I'm sorry" he whispered as he wiped away my tears. "You know how busy I've been with the season starting and stuff. You'll forgive me right? I'll make it up to you, promise." he said while I nodded along to him. My friends hated his guts, but I was the one covering for him. When they asked why we weren't public; I said I wanted to be private. When they asked about Lando's multiple infidelities I would lie to their face and say that everything was a lie and a ploy to ruin his reputation; that's what I knew then and believed. I would see them face palm themselves mentally, now that I thought about it.

I guess being embarrassed by the man you love, multiple times, publicly can fuck you up. Because right now, I couldn't even cry anymore. I couldn't believe the other girls wouldn't even reply to my texts on the group chat; they added me to. This was humiliating. I was done with that asshole and I wasn't about to let him walk all over me anymore.

I wiped away the tears that were streaming down my face. I got dressed and decided to show up at the same bar he was at. When I entered, I saw him, dancing and drinking with others. I saw the other drivers with their girlfriends; I couldn't help but laugh bitterly. I walked up to the bar and sat down and started ordering the most expensive drinks they had. "Bad day?" The bartend asked. "Horrible, my boyfriend's been cheating on me" I chuckled. "I'm sorry." he looked apologetic. "You have nothing to apologise for. Just add the tab of every drink I put down my throat to that guy in the white shirt" I said directing his eyes to Lando. "Lando Norris?" he asked. "Yeah" I said and started to drink. I was sure Lando saw, I could feel it. I felt multiple eyes. I felt my phone buzz multiple time; I wasn't sure if it was some one who cared about me or those assholes since I didn't want to check my phone.

After a good hour of just drowning my feelings in alcohol, I stumbled my way out of the bar. I had made the decision to move out of that hotel room to another hotel and stay there before I flew back to get all my stuff. Lando would be too hammered to realise I was gone. I woke up the next morning with a major hangover but I knew what I wanted. I flew back to our his home in Monaco and took all my stuff; thankfully not a lot and left with a note on the table saying 'We are done'. I left any and everything he gave me, which wasn't a lot when you think about how I was dating a millionaire. I blocked Lando's number while I waited for my flight back home, can't believe I gave so much up for this man boy. I will be putting myself first finally.

{Lando's POV}

I saw her, but I wasn't sure if it was really Y/N so I texted her but no reply. Apparently, she was at the bar we were at but she didn't approach me or us. Everyone saw her, I thought she didn't see us but I found out she knew I was there since she billed everything she had to me; which was a lot of alcohol, almost enough to cover half the amount I spent on the group. I knew I was fucked. I had no idea how I was gonna explain myself to her. I tried texting her but no reply. I think she blocked me and when I saw twitter I saw Y/N had posted a story but I couldn't see it either; guess she blocked me on there too.

I flew back as soon as I was able to, to find the house empty and a note on the table saying we're done. I guess I deserved that after the shit I pulled; well at least it's not as messy as I expected it to be.

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scentedpeachlandcreator · 7 months ago

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Guide for manifesting weight loss:

So an Anon asked me to make this and here it is, it will help others too.

As we all know that we often struggle with achieving our weight goal,doing workout,keeping a strict diet and eating healthy etc...

All of this was created by man, a man-made creation like Times, Machines, names, studies, science and many more.

And of course this was all coming from the imagination.

But i'm here to tell you that nothing is set in stone, your beliefs/assumption are the true fact.

Don't do things that you don't want to, just for you to loss weight ,because some non loa-believe people told you to.

Do whatever you want! Cause you make the rules and you control your own reality.

And you should be grateful that you discovered loa out of BILLIONS OF PEOPLE that are living miserably, believing that they should work hard to have what they want, following society rules.

Knowing your true power:

You need to understand that you are what we call God ,an Infinite being that could do anything without limitation.

You Can be whoever you want, get anything you want and more, even manifest the most illogical things, and this all because you're a consciousness that Can decide whoever version of themselves is gonna be.

But does God need to follow the rules? Does god need to do method? Does god need to do challenge? NO!! ABSOLUTELY NOT! YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOUR MIND TELLS YOU TO, HELL! EVEN YOU CAN CREATE YOUR OWN RULES AND METHOD.

YOU ➜ God (imagination) ➜ create your own rules and method and Can manifest anything you want into your reality.

You Can be a model, having that pretty face, being a billionaire, living in that penthouse, having a yacht, fancy car, being with your handsome/pretty SP, having that perfect body. Having superpowers, having a little fairy, having a Magic portal in your room and swimming in money and MANY MORE.

All of that with what? Without even Lifting a single little finger, everything you ever wanted already EXIST, there's many versions of yourself with your desires, and with just that pretty powerful mind of yours.

Understanding the Law:

The law of assumption indicate that whatever you assume to be true will Harden into fact with persistence.

Manifesting your desires into the physical reality just requires you to change your inner self so that the outer World will follow.

The 3d is a mirror ➜ changing your self (4d) ➜ persisting ➜ the 3d will reflect your 4d ➜ yay! You have your desires in the physical reality.

It is very simple and easy.

All of this just needs discipline and having faith in yourself and your true power as a god.

Now the important part of this post.

How to manifest weight loss while ignoring the 3d:

We do know that manifesting weight loss might seem difficult for the most of us.

While you're manifesting and there's the people that surround you Always ALWAYS complaining and pointing about your appearance, your weight and that might get you very pissed off and angry.

I am myself suffering from this, my parents Always pointing at my appearance,saying that i look fat (and that not true they are just exaggerating things, my Friends told me that i have a beautiful body but i hide it with over-sized clothes cause i'm insecure), and they force me to go workout when i don't want to (cause obviously i hate sport and socializing) and which caused a HUGE ARGUMENTS with them, and i Lost it (cause i have anger issues) but they didn't listen they told me it for my own good🙄 my ass, so i had no choice but to listen to them but i'm DONE FOLLOWING SOCIETY RULES AND BELIEFS.

So yeah i'm not listening to anybody but my personal beliefs cause i'm the only one who knows the truth, the cheat code to life.

you Can eat whatever you want and with the belief that you won't gain a single weight and it's will become a fact.

Your beliefs and assumption matters and don't listen to anybody.

Okay so now you might wonder how to manifest weight loss while interacting with the 3d every single day and it very simple:

➜ firstly choose what desired weight or body you want to manifest.

➜ secondly knows that you do already have it in imagination and creation is finished, you're already that version of yourself that is skinny or muscular.

➜ thirdly you need to keep persisting no matter what the 3d tells you cause that will make the subconscious really believes you're that desired version of yourself.

➜ and lastly dismiss the 3d, if the people surrounding you keep pointing at your appearance just ignore them and affirm in your head that you already have your desired weight or body and knows that the 3d will change.

You really need to throw Logic in the trash , Logic won't get you anywhere but imagination will.

"Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world." Albert Einstein.

"Logic will take you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere" Albert Einstein.

"You believe in God? Believe also in your imagination" Neville Goddard.

You want to have that perfect body? Yes you Can, you want to have that Chinese standard Body? Yes you Can! You want to be muscular and lean? Yeah you definitely Can.

Just pick and choose, fulfilling yourself in your imagination and accepting it as fact and the 3d will follow.

Seriously it is really simple, just don't overcomplicate it.

Just have faith and trust in yourself and you'll definitely do it.

I don't want anybody sending me Ask in my Inbox After this post.

Go apply and you'll definitely thank me for it. (Read this one)

I advice you to read these post they're really Amazing and it will surely make it click for you:

This, and this, this and this, this one, and this one, this, this, this, this,this one, and this, this last one.

And lastly you're the only one that Can change your reality, no one Can do it for you, you're already a master manifestor and void master and you're on the pedestal.

You were meant to change your life and live in happiness and wealth.

_ Xoxo, Eli

#law of assumption #loa tumblr #loa #loa blog #law of manifestation #how to manifest #loassumption #void state

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woso-dreamzzz · 7 months ago

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Icy II

Mapi León x Ingrid Engen x Teen!Reader

Summary: You think about your life

When you first moved from Norway and your childhood team of SK Brann, you weren't quite sure what to expect.

You were nervous and anxious and that didn't settle at all even as you headed out of the airport to meet up with Ingrid.

You'd like to think you knew Ingrid fairly well, or at least well enough that she was letting you take her spare room. You'd been called up for the past three Norway camps, though you hadn't actually set foot on the pitch.

You'd come up through Brann's Academy, the top assister in the under-nineteen team and had even been called up to the first team on occasion.

That's where you think Barcelona heard of you because suddenly the La Masia version of your youth team was making the long trek to cold Norway in the height of winter to play a friendly.

They completely demolished your team but you had been serving perfect assists into the box those scant few times you had possession of the ball.

It wasn't even a week later that they were offering you a contract. You'd assumed it was for the B team but clearly the club saw something in you because the contract was for the first team and soon you were flying over to Spain to move in with Ingrid.

She wasn't alone as you approached her car, talking to a woman you recognised as Mapi León.

You didn't speak Spanish, that much was always obvious. You only spoke passable English as well so communication with your new teammates was something that was at the front of your mind.

But Mapi just smiled at you and sounded out a sentence she had clearly memorised in Norwegian to help settle you.

You liked Mapi, you decided in the instant and decided that you would actually try hard in your Spanish lessons so you could communicate with her properly without Ingrid as the go between.

You had a day or two to settle in your new home but ultimately meeting your new teammates had come along too quickly for your liking.

You knew Ingrid, of course. You kind of knew Mapi.

You knew Caro as well. You usual position was hers so you had worked closely at Norway camp together.

She'd come out to meet you, Ingrid and Mapi in the car park.

Caro existed on your wavelength. You were both quiet and a little socially awkward. You both played the same position. You understood each other.

You weren't huggers though. You had never really received a lot of affection as a kid, just a quick head pat when you exceeded your parents' already high expectation for you.

You weren't a hugger. Caro wasn't a hugger but the way her arm rested over your shoulders was support enough.

Meeting the team was something that sent you into a bit of a tailspin. All those world class players and you.

If Ingrid hadn't been behind you, a gentle hand pushing you forward, you were sure that you would have bolted.

She was a steady presence then and now as she lays in bed with you.

You think she feels bad about yelling at you. You think she also feels bad about not getting a hold of your parents until hours after the incident. If you hadn't been in unimaginable pain, you would have warned Ingrid that your parents rarely answered if it wasn't a formal email.

Ingrid's been stuck to you since you woke up, waiting hand and foot on you. You feel bad about that. It's just a broken wrist. It was just a little surgery. You don't need her to cater to your every need. You don't want to bother her like that.

"Have the painkillers kicked in yet?"

With your wrist still strapped up, you couldn't feel much pain apart from when it moved so Ingrid had dosed you up on as much medication as possible.

She'd done the same with Mapi an hour ago so her girlfriend was currently asleep in bed while Ingrid waits for the same to happen to you.

"Mmm," You grunt.

"That's not an answer," She teases," Have they kicked in yet?"

You try to tilt your wrist, a little hard to do in your cast but you still try. "Mostly. A little twinge."

You can feel Ingrid nod behind you.

"I think it's naptime."

"I'm not a baby."

"Mapi's napping. Is she a baby?"

You don't even have to think. "Yes."

Ingrid laughs behind you, hands untangling the knots in your hair. "The doctor said that a nap would probably help."

You huff.

You've never been much of a napper. You always liked to be doing something even if that something was cleaning up your room or reading a book.

"Fine."

You roll over on your side to lay your head against Ingrid's chest as her arm comes up around you to keep you close.

The door opens and Mapi limps in, laying her crutches on the ground to crawl into bed on Ingrid's other side.

She yawns.

"You didn't tell me we were having a sleepover," She complains sleepily, pulling some of the blankets away from you.

"We weren't." The painkillers have fully kicked in now so you're drowsy as well.

You know you and Mapi are talking but it's all jumbled up in your brain.

Ingrid feels the moment you go to sleep, the steady train of nonsense coming out of your mouth slows down and you go completely limp.

Mapi falls asleep soon after as well, her yapping coming to a close mid sentence as you both snooze comfortably on her chest.

This wasn't quite the plan.

Get Mapi to sleep.

Get you to sleep.

Then make dinner.

That was the plan but you're both crowded around Ingrid's body on your little bed that barely fits you all and Ingrid doesn't want to move and wake you.

Bagheera jumps onto the bed.

"Don't," Ingrid laughs but Bagheera ignores her.

She settles comfortably in Ingrid's stomach and falls asleep too, leaving Ingrid well and truly pinned down.

It's fine, she decides.

Both you and Mapi are out of hospital.

You can just order food when everyone's awake.

#woso x reader #mapi leon x reader #mapi leon #ingrid engen x reader #ingrid engen #woso community #woso imagine #woso fanfics #woso

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xoxosimp · 9 months ago

Text

On Your Wrist

Synopsis: You and Bucky are in the early stages of your relationship, and he has some trouble getting the perfect gift for you.

Pairing: Mob!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

Warnings: soft mob bucky is a warning, mention of sex, Bucky’s petname for reader is “light”, mediocre writing

A/N: This was supposed to be a drabble LMAO but my brain said nawp. This is HEAVILY inspired by Young Sheldon and the song “ Loveeeeeee song” by Rihanna

~~~~

Love was a phenomenon that didn't come easy for Bucky Barnes to understand.

He didn't understand why he was so wrapped up in all things you. The way you laughed, your sweet smile, how you managed to hypnotize him with just a look in your pretty eyes; if he could drown in you, he would.

Bucky’s world was nothing but materialistic. The more dirty money he made , the more cars, watches, and houses he grew to love. The women he used to spend his time with loved all of those things, too. But no dollar amount could begin to describe the love James Buchanan Barnes has for you.

It was almost silly how fast Bucky fell in love with you. He found himself doing things he would have never done before falling in love with you. He would make breakfast for you even though he has a private chef. The benefit of being the head of a criminal organization was people waited for him. So there was no meeting he couldn't postpone, all if it meant Bucky could spend more time with you.

You were his light in his dark world. Before being with you, his purpose was to lead. To kill. You gavee his life meaning he’d never thought he would experience. If you were an angel, he was the devil that would bow to you and repent.

Diamonds and gold were no stranger to Bucky, but the six-figure tennis bracelet he had in his pocket made his hands damp with sweat. You and Bucky were still early in your relationship where he wanted to impress you. And diamonds are very impressive.

He was leaning against his Maserati, waiting for you to get off work so he could take you to dinner, for no other reason than it was Tuesday and he loved you (not that he’s told you yet).

Love was a phenomenon that stopped time whenever you looked at Bucky. It was a look of love and adoration, that nothing else existed except for you and him. It was a look that was shared between soulmates.

You say goodbye to your coworker and greet Bucky with a hug. He tilted your chin so you could kiss him. If it was Bucky’s choice, he’d have your lips on his all fucking day. You pulled away and smiled at him. “ How was your day, Jamie?”

“ Better now that I’m with you, light”.

You wrapped your hands around his waist. “ Where are we going for dinner?”

“I was thinking May’s?” he suggested.

“ Oh thank gosh,” you sighed, “ I have been craving fries all day.”

He chuckled and led to the passenger side to open the door for you. “ I have something for you first, light.”

“ Is it chocolate?” You wiggled your eyebrows.

Bucky took the box from his pocket and gave it to you. Your face lighted up but dims. He can't distinguish the look on your face, whether it’s unhappiness or anger, the smile you wore doesn't quite reach your eyes.

“It’s-It’s beautiful Bucky,” you managed to stutter out.

He raised an eyebrow to communicate a “But?. “It’s too much.”

Bucky was a little taken aback. The women he used to surround himself with would have taken it without hesitation. Some would say it was not enough. “ Nothing is too much for you,light,” he said firmly.

“ I could never give you something to equate to-to this-”

“ And you don't have to,” he interrupted softly, “ I wanted to get something for you, so I did,” he shrugged.

He saw you gulp and close the box. “ You got something for me that costs more than a house,” you said.

“That’s not the only reason you’re rejecting my gift, light,” he stated matter of factly.

“It’s not my style,” you mumbled. “ Are you mad?”

Bucky cupped your cheek and you leaned into his warmth, “ Well I’m not ecstatic that you rejected my gift, but I’m glad you feel safe enough to tell me .”

“But if you say I can't take you out for dinner, then I’ll be really sad, doll.” That pulled a chuckle out of you.

Bucky opened the car door for you to sit. “ I’d hate to see you sad, Jamie,” you stated.

“It’s too much,” your words replayed in the back of Bucky’s mind.

As much as he’d love to hear those words spilling from your lips when he’s fucking you deep into his mattress, this was a sign he needed to hold back a little. As much as he wanted to impress you, he didn't want to scare you off.

I can tone it back, Bucky said to himself.

~~~~~

After coming back from a work meeting, you found a box with your name on it. The only logical answer is that it’s from Bucky. Any secret admirers you could have had were too afraid of Bucky Barnes to profess their love.

You sighed as you opened the box, waiting for a more expensive gift than the last one. If he was bothered by your rejection, he didn't show it. Dinner with him was as lovely as it always was.

You weren't insecure that your boyfriend made more money than you, because as cliche as it was, it’s the thought that counts.

In the box was a small string bracelet, decorated with blue and black beads. In the center were three white beads with the letters “JBB”.

Your smile was so wide your cheeks were starting to hurt. You reached for your phone to send Bucky a thank you text, but a deep voice startled you.

“ I like to see my light smile,” Bucky stood on the other side of your desk.

“ What are you doing here?” you giggled as you made your way over to embrace him.

“Thought I’d take you out for lunch,” he said casually, then placed a kiss on your forehead.

“Thank you for the bracelet, Jay,” you said as he took the bracelet and put it on your wrist, straightening the beads.

“ Anything for you, light” Bucky mumbled as he kissed the inside of your wrist.

Hopefully the next diamond he gives you, he’ll put it on your ring finger. Cross his fingers you won't reject that one.

~~~~~~

the bracelet in question

Part Two

#bucky x f!reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #mafia bucky x reader #mafia bucky barnes #mafia bucky x you #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes oneshot #bucky barnes fluff

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elllisaaa · 9 months ago

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my head is empty

i swear to god this man HAS to stop because i'm going fucking insane over how good he looks. he's out of this world, really

imagine SUGAR DADDY!SUNGHOON who's spoiling you all the time. he's rich and successful, and he wants to spend all his money on you only because he can.

every night when he comes home and you welcome him by kissing his cheek and asking him how his day went, he's overwhelmed with the need to worship every little part of you and your body. he lets you serve him dinner and eat with him, but after that, the rest of the night is all about you and what you want. sunghoon is kissing and marking your skin, giving you everything you need and more, giving you his fingers, his tongue, his cock.

"you're perfect for me doll, such a good girl."

and the fact that you're existing and that you're his is enough for sunghoon to buy you gifts, often very expensive because his girl deserves only the best. and don't ever think about paying anything on your own - his card and bank account are yours and you can have anything you want as long as you pay with his money. sunghoon wants you to know that you can have whatever you've ever wanted and that he will make every one of your dreams come true. and knowing that you're wearing things that he payed for is enough for him.

"i did some shopping today hoonie ! you wanna see ?" - "always pretty girl, show me what you got."

he will 100% buy you lingerie sets, asking you to try all of them on and then picking out the one he likes the most to fuck you in it. and if he rips it off, his only answer is : "don't worry about it, i'll buy you another one. just let me ruin your pretty cunt, doll." and sunghoon also loves to dress you up, picking out the most expensive dresses and outfits for you and matching with them so when you go out you look all dolled up for him. and then after your night out, he fucks you in his sport car, not caring about the price of the leather of the seats he's making you squirt into. and it's even better if you're only wearing the jewellery he bought for you by the end of it.

"who do you belong to, doll ?" - "you, hoon, i'm only yours."

#sugar daddy!hoon on top #eli answering your questions #eli's moots #dinna's asks #enhypen smut #enhypen hard hours #enhypen hard thoughts #sunghoon x reader #sunghoon smut #sunghoon hard hours #sunghoon hard thoughts

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astraystayyh · 2 years ago

Text

The wedding and the morning after

inspired by that cute twitter trend :,) very soft bang chan fluff. use of wife and husband a lot but they just got married so they get a pass!!!!!

if you guys enjoy reading please leave a reblog or comment it means the world to me <3

Your wedding ceremony with Chan was a simple one. You weren't one for extravagance and neither was he. So you opted for an intimate setting, only inviting your favorite humans in there.

You felt as if everything was more vibrant that day- the colors of the flowers you both hand-picked, the smell of food that wafted through the air, the twinkling lights you had installed because they reminded Chan of your eyes (or so he insisted).

But you knew it had a lot less to do with the decorations, and more with the man you married. Being with Chan was like looking at the world through rose-tinted glasses.

You felt grateful that you were alive because you got to experience being loved by him.

There was music, lots of laughter, and admittedly, tears. You can blame Chan's vows for it. His words rang in your ears throughout the night- how he vowed to love you until his last breath, and long after that.

But he didn't need to make those promises, they were just honorifics. Chan has shown you time and time again that he was in love with you.

You knew by the way he tore down your walls, gently, at your pace, your hand tightly clutched in his. How he deeply cared for you, on your happy days but especially on your saddest.

You and Chan weren't perfect, but you complemented each other like two halves of one heart. You found in him a home, a safe place for you to exist and be loved.

"You are so beautiful", he whispers in your ears while the both of you sway on the dance floor. You could faintly hear the cheers of the boys who were watching you, but you paid no mind to them. All you could focus on was Chan's warm hands on your waist, holding you close.

"So are you", you beam at him. When you looked at Chan, you didn't simply see his beautiful features- his brown eyes, straight nose and plump lips. You saw a warm coffee shop, where you seek refuge on a cold day; you saw a sunset slowly casting down into the sea; you saw a field of tulips stretching into the horizon.

Looking at Chan reminded you of beautiful sceneries, of the smell of earth after the rain, of a hearty soup that fills your insides when you are ill. You saw in him every beautiful feeling you've ever experienced in your life.

"I don't know how I got so lucky", he kisses your forehead gently and you close your eyes, savoring the feel of his lips on your skin.

Chan's forehead kisses held a special place in your heart. You always felt them deep within you- as if he was kissing beyond your skin and into your soul.

"I'm the lucky one", you reply, standing on your tiptoes and pecking his forehead back. Chan blushes at your gesture, eyes crinkling closed like half moons. It made your heart sore, how affected he was by your touch even after four years of dating. You liked to believe you'd be seventy and still a giggling mess around each other.

Chan then twirls you around, your laugh echoing around the venue. He thinks to himself that he'd do anything to make you laugh this way for the rest of your lives.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

"My feet are killing me", you whine to Chan as he parks in front of your apartment. You chose not to rush into your honeymoon, because you wanted to savor the quiet after your wedding, just the two of you. And you couldn't think of a better place to do so than your apartment.

It wasn't a huge one, but it had a makeshift studio for Chan, and a little balcony where you read. You painted the walls blue together and he bought you plants that you water everyday.

It was messy at times, but it was still your home. You knew that no matter what happened throughout the day, you can leave your worries at the door and head inside into each other's safe embrace.

Chan quickly hops to your side of the car, and opens it for you. He takes your heels off, throwing them into the backseat, before scooping you up bridal style.

"I've been dying to do this on our wedding night", he giggles excitedly and you smile, loosely looping your hands around his neck.

"Well now you can, husband."

"Say it again", he smiles as he leads you up to your apartment.

"My husband", you repeat and he quickly leans down to steal a kiss.

Chan opens the door to your apartment, finally placing you on solid ground. He loosens his black tie and you lean against the wall, admiring the view.

"Like what you see?", he teases and you smile mischievously, "This is what I married you for."

"So you are only with me for my looks?", he pouts. You would have thought he looked so adorable if not for him slowly unbuttoning his white shirt.

"I am", you smirk and suddenly, you are thrown over his shoulder. You laugh as he runs towards the bedroom, with you perched on his back.

He then gently places you down on the bed, caging your body with his arms; any hint of playfulness gone from his eyes. His gaze is so intense, you feel a blush creep up your neck. He notices, of course, and he smiles softly at you. "Is my wife getting shy on me?"

"Shut up", you glare playfully at him, and he grins, "Make me."

"You are so cheesy", you giggle as you grab his tie, pulling him down to meet your lips in a feverish kiss.

°°°°°°°°°°°

"Morning, my love", Chan smiles at you, his hand threading through your hair gently.

"Morning, honey", you smile back, stretching slightly.

"Did you sleep well?", he asks, snuggling closer to you.

"Mhm, like a baby."

"I must have tired you yesterday", he smirks and you glare playfully at him, "Cocky much?"

"And you love it."

You're about to reply when your stomach grumbles loudly. "Is my pretty wife hungry?", he teases and you bite his arm in response.

"I'll take that as a yes", he chuckles, pulling you up with him, "Let's go make you breakfast."

"Make who breakfast?" you singsong and he smiles softly at you. "Make my wife breakfast."

°°°°°°°°°°°°

You are clad in Chan's oversized t-shirt and he's only wearing a pair of black shorts. The view of Chan's back muscles is so enticing you'd almost skip breakfast if you weren't so hungry.

When you are both done cooking, you happily dig into the breakfast while recounting the weddings events- how Hyunjin and Minho got so drunk they ended up confessing their love to each other, how Felix cried during your vows, how Seungmin and Jeongin surprised you with a song cover during your first dance. You can't help but sigh contently at how simple yet loving it felt.

You then wash the dishes while Chan dries them- an easy routine you both fell into as soon as he moved in with you.

You've been married to Chan for a day but you've loved him for what feels like forever.

When the kitchen is clean, you high-five him but he doesn't let your hand go. Instead, he intertwines his fingers with yours, bringing you closer to him.

"I love you", he whispers as his thumb slowly caresses your palm.

"I love you more."

"Impossible."

"But-", Chan silences you with his lips on yours, and you both can't help but smile into the kiss.

When he leans away, he bows down slightly, offering you his hand, "May i have this dance?"

You giggle as you curtsy back, "Yes you may."

Chan twirls you around the kitchen and you feel light as air. You then spin him around and you almost lose your balance, but Chan is there to steady you with a gentle grip.

As you catch your breath, you take a moment to look around you. The kitchen is bathed in warm, golden light, and the aroma of freshly made coffee fills the air. You can't help but wonder what you'd look like to an outsider, waltzing in the kitchen with no music on.

But as you gaze up at your husband, you don't find it in you to care. You've come to learn that with Chan, even the silence can sound like the most enchanting melody.

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solecize · 1 month ago

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𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐓 | 𝐣𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐤𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 (6)

remember lookin' at this room, we loved it 'cause of the light now, i just sit in the dark and wonder if it's time ten years of being one and the same with jungkook as the country's it couple is the perfect disguise for the reality of a tumultuous relationship hidden behind the scenes. ten years of lies and love and crawling back to one another. once shy, budding first love that blossomed before the weight of fame, the cracks begin to surface amidst your respective rises to stardom and navigation of your twenties. either finding euphoria or the end of the world, there's never any in between in existence for you and jungkook. as you build each other up and break each other down in front of millions of eyes, there is a crossroads ahead with words of "marriage" and "military" looming in the air - all while ignoring the price of fame breathing down your necks. this is the story of love and the lessons learned from the man you made your religion. and i wouldn't marry me either, a pathological people-pleaser who only wanted you to see her

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: jungkook picks up the pieces of the mess he made, as he looks back on his choices and the people he surrounded himself with. 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒: idol!jungkook/female idol!reader and fictional versions of various idols 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐑𝐄. idol au, on-and-off relationship, angst, i swear there's fluff, fake dating, and themes of first love, growing up, struggles with fame, and marriage (ish) 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒. PLEASE DON'T EXPECT HAPPINESS, portrayal of a toxic couple (implications of emotional abuse and control), both main characters are very flawed, violence, infidelity, foul language, substance use (illegal drugs) 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄. based off of "you're losing me" by taylor swift. this is a fictional portrayal of real-life people that implement some aspects of real-life events. hi welcome back everyone!! it's been a very long time since the last update and i just really wanted to push something out, so hopefully this doesn't seem super rushed because it was important for me to get over my writing slump:) ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤjoin the taglist here!

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤm.list | previous | next

every mornin' i glared with you with storms in my eyes how can you say that you love someone you can't tell is dyin'?

TOP HEADLINE TODAY: are bts' jungkook and s.iren's nova the new power couple of the entertainment industry? positive reception indicates rare acceptance of idol relationshipㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ may 2018

jungkook was still so young, but as he examined his appearance in the mirror, he couldn’t help but notice the way age settled beneath his skin. one couldn’t tell by first glance, but his eyes were old and tired. it was difficult to remember the last time they lit up with a spark, rather than sitting half lidded and apathetic. his lips were fixed into a permanent frown when he was away from the cameras, despondent like worn out leather. nothing could cut through the fabric, especially not now. he was reminded of this, as his manager read out his schedule for the day and several stylists picked at his dark hair that fell just above his eyes now. his shoulders drooped further when he heard your name amongst the activities laid out for him.

“the red carpet begins at seven, your and y/n’s car will arrive at approximately seven twenty four - not too late, not too early that nobody will be there.”

this was the first public event that the two of you were scheduled to attend as a couple. of course, that was nerve wracking enough, but it didn’t help that you were still giving him the cold shoulder. he didn’t expect anything else and any blame would be misplaced, but it was worrying to look forward to feigning happiness for the cameras. he knew you like the back of his hand and you were a horrible liar. he knew every quirk at the corner of your lips when you smiled and the way a crease formed between your eyebrows when you grew frustrated. jungkook was one of the only people who noticed the way you bit the inside of your cheek when you got nervous and how you looked at people’s ears instead of their eyes when you got shy.

once upon a time, he would say that it was because you were his. now, you weren’t and he was just some stranger who knew every inch of you with his eyes closed.

jungkook hated himself for what he did to you and what he hated even more was that the world continued to spin regardless. his members, some oblivious to jungkook’s betrayal and others simply just suspicious of his faithfulness to his girlfriend, continued treating their youngest member as usual. seokjin and jimin gave him the hardest time, as the former was genuinely the most disappointed in jungkook and gave him a week-long cold shoulder after yelling at him, while jimin had to bear witness to the dramatic confrontation at hotel azure. however, there was no choice but to simply condemn jungkook’s actions and move on - they were still a unit whose careers relied on each other. they were also brothers at the end of the day and disagreeing with one person wouldn’t break their bond.

besides, it was clearly a sensitive topic for jungkook, despite the mass of guilt weighing his body down with every breath he took. no one heard from him for days following the dispatch article, presumably locked up in his apartment and drinking his consciousness away. everyone knew about his growing drinking problem, but were shocked to see the extent of it when they finally confronted him.

“i don’t think you should be the one crying and hiding,” muttered hoseok, who led the charge in recovering jungkook after everyone got fed up with him ghosting anyone who tried to reach him.

it was the eldest four of the group who broke into his home, just several hours prior to their flight to tokyo for a weekend-long event. this was after the first few days since the news broke and since anyone saw him in person. seokjin, although refusing to speak to jungkook, brought food for him, while namjoon and hoseok physically dragged him out of bed and yoongi forcibly went through his belongings to pack clothes on his behalf.

“i’m sorry, i don’t know what’s wrong with me,” was all jungkook could make out and it wasn’t clear if he was referring to the fact that he wasn’t cooperating or the situation with you as a whole. it also wasn’t clear if his hoarse speech was due to being under the influence or from crying.

yoongi pinched the bridge of his nose, watching his members push jungkook into his washroom to get himself decent. “this. . .this is pathetic,” he said, as there were no other words to describe the scene.

at least namjoon managed a sympathetic expression on his features. “he keeps saying over and over again that he’s sorry.”

and that was all jungkook knew. that he was sorry. that he had never made such a mistake in his life. he also knew that he had no explanation or excuse, no matter how he rationalized his actions to himself in the past few months. jungkook couldn’t figure out how he even did such a thing, until yoongi stopped him in his tracks, just before the five of them departed jungkook’s apartment.

jungkook nearly lost balance, as his head hung low as he walked and dragged his suitcase behind him. the others looked on from the hallway, upon noticing that yoongi paused in front of jungkook before he could close the front door behind him.

“your pockets. empty them, kook.”

yoongi knew before jungkook even realized that he brought it along. it was simply second nature and that was the problem. if it was even possible for further shame to illuminate in his dark eyes, jungkook made sure to cut his gaze away to avoid his older friend’s fiery one. without a word of protest, jungkook reached into the side of his jacket and revealed a flask, which he tossed on the floor behind him.

that was two weeks ago. it wasn’t much to be proud of, but jungkook swore on sobriety since then.

that meant it was also over two weeks since he saw you in person. even though it felt like forever, he knew it didn’t mean jack shit to you, who he knew hated him. the look in your eyes when you begged your company to not have anything to do with him, was something he could never forget. he wanted to scrub it off his skin until it was raw. the shame jungkook felt overwhelmed him to the point where he knew he wasn’t even worthy to feel guilt. he was embarrassed for the man he became.

however, the world kept spinning. nobody stopped to care for his problems or his mistakes, especially with the career he chose. jungkook was bts’ jungkook and people were relying on him - his fans, his group members, his company. nobody cared and he didn’t expect anyone to.

he didn’t care about the world continuing to spin in spite of him - his thoughts were consumed with how you were doing as the sun continued to set and rise amidst your suffering. jungkook couldn’t even bear to look you up on social media or the internet. sure, he would be reminded of the insane predicament that your companies just placed on the two of you, but more importantly, jungkook knew that he had no place checking up on you. he wanted nothing more than to pull you into his arms and weep, to patch up the deep wound he inflicted on you. when your companies made the publicity plan official, jungkook thought it was the heavens above granting him some sort of second chance at winning you back.

yet, as he waited in a limousine, waiting for your arrival to drive over to this red carpet event, he was nervous. jungkook felt oxygen trapped in his throat, choking on the fear of facing you once more and it burned a deep hole in his body. he didn’t deserve this. you didn’t deserve this.

over the past two weeks, you didn't know how else to deal with your emotions other than the only way you’d done so for years - by ignoring it and shoving it into the back of your mind. if anyone crossed paths with you, they would simply congratulate you on the successful relationship and ask to say hi to your new public boyfriend. you would plaster on a tight smile and thank the person through your teeth.

the worst part was that no one even knew. even if they were present on that fateful night at hotel azure, any party attendee who saw the news could only assume that you were merely a spineless coward that crawled back to jungkook despite being publicly betrayed. you were defenseless and all of your walls were broken down.

it was an ironic thing, for the two of you to be so alone in the world and being pushed towards one another at the same time.

anyone could see that something was wrong, but it didn’t matter and no one dared to speak up. your makeup artist’s curious eyes were hard to miss, as she prompted for you to stop furrowing your eyebrows during the application of your foundation, but your pr manager’s cut eye from the corner of the dressing room silenced any questioning.

“how many times did you read it over?”

through gritted teeth, you responded, “seven.”

the stack of papers wedged between a flimsy plastic binder were just about as thick as your wrist and felt heavier that it actually was - likely because you were forced to carry it everywhere you went for the past few days. it was a collection of various documents relating to media and public relations, including the full-length version of your NDA with your company and bighit in relation to your coupling with jungkook. there was also a detailed guide to answering interview questions, how to stand next to one another, social media etiquette, and anything that could ever come up. hell, there was written practice on how to look at one another.

ms. choi was the special pr manager assigned to all activities and releases concerning your public relationship. you had met her at the meeting with the board of directors at the bighit company building and she reminded you of a math teacher that you used to hate in school. domineering, always looking over your schedule, and sent shivers up and down your spine. she was not someone to be messed with and above all, she was extremely particular about how she wanted things done. anyone would be a fool to cross her - perfect for the role she was hired to do.

she required you to review the binder several times before all public appearances and it was exhausting. you also had an inkling that your beloved didn’t have the same treatment and your suspicions were confirmed when you crossed paths with him for the first time in weeks, bearing no papers or preparation of any kind in his hands.

instead, he was positioned at the farthest corner of the limousine when the door was opened for you, taking his own precautions against you.

jungkook’s stomach dropped when the vehicle came to a stop in front of the familiar sight of your company building. there was a ticking time bomb at the core of his ribs and it was an explosion to be set off as soon as he saw your shadowy figure approach through the tinted windows. even though he’d been doing everything in his power to brace himself, he still flinched when the door swung open.

his entire body turned cold with rage and guilt when his eyes fell on you. he imagined greek goddesses dripping in gold and glowing in divinity throughout the history of time, but they still wouldn’t hold a candle to you. it was difficult to pinpoint the source of such celestial haze - perhaps your appearance long muddled in self-hatred and anger since hotel azure and now a glistening memory being remembered before his very eyes. it was like learning a lost nostalgia, as if it had been more than mere weeks since laying eyes on you. the taste was bitter and he refused to deem himself worthy of such a thing, but if you picked at jungkook’s brain and held him against his will, it would be a whispered confession of falling in love all over again.

in a tint of twinkling champagne, you donned a floor length evening gown with a fitted, mermaid silhouette. the beaded sweetheart neckline hugged your torso and was accentuated with a sharper edge at your clavicle, before creating a bolder figure flaring out into an hourglass shape. your hair was slicked back into a wet look, as loose curls enhanced by waist-length extensions framed your face. the makeup chosen for the look was simple - a nude gloss, soft flush of pink blush and a sharp eyeliner wing. the star of the show was truly your dress, as just a pair of small gold drop earrings were your only accessory.

thankfully, the dress wore you and not the other way around, as your misery was too loud to not be seen and so, the glamour of your attire created a successful camouflage. if anyone looked at you, they would only see your beauty and not your anguish - a heartbreaking curse on women who chased fame as their body of work.

the curse almost snuck past jungkook, who initially was struck by your appearance, but then saw the way you bit the inside of your cheek. the way emptiness sunk behind your regard. the way you accidentally locked eyes with him and broke away immediately, as if letting a curse word slip or touching something too hot.

“ten minutes to arrival.” jungkook’s manager cut through the obvious tension in the air, thick as nectar.

you sat opposite of him, pretending to pick at your manicured nails after setting your binder next to you and in between his manager. the space was well-needed, as you could barely acknowledge any of his team in the limousine.

jungkook replayed this moment prior to your arrival dozens of times in his head and in every version, he couldn’t even sputter out a polite greeting. he had no place. in this timeline, he, too, failed to say hello.

as the next few seconds progressed, those around you and jungkook were shifting in clear discomfort. jungkook wasn’t exactly prepared by any means, as his staff had barely been able to get him to respond with something more than a grunt and nod to any attempted interaction throughout the day. meanwhile, your team was watching you like a hawk, policing you like a child with your every move.

naturally, someone from your side - thinking that they uncovered the secret key - reached into a compartment and pulled out a pristine bottle of cristal.

with the hopes of easing the tension-filled air, she looked between the two of you and mused, “first public appearance together. drinks anyone?”

you were reaching for a flute already, even before jungkook could wave off the champagne. he didn’t miss the way several individuals in the car, including his own manager, exchanged shocked expressions at his decline. jungkook never said no to a drink before an event and it wasn’t rare for him to already show up slightly inebriated in the first place.

for the first time, you willingly looked up at him, also taken aback. before his eyes could blink back to yours, you were already staring out the window and sipping slowly on your champagne. if you allowed yourself to let your thoughts linger too long on jungkook’s rejection of alcohol, it would mean you cared. meanwhile, he assumed you’d already gone through all sorts of emotions, likely the entire seven stages of grief. maybe you finally came to accept that you no longer needed jungkook in your life.

however, there were precisely four moments that altered everything.

moment number one occurred precisely twenty three minutes after your reunion with jungkook. at this point, he’d used up the entire time on the way to the event trying to not appear like he was sulking. thankfully, your managers began explaining the agenda for the night and several, firm reminders of do’s and don’ts for the camera. the conversation filled up the heavy, dreadful space lingering between you two in the car.

though there was an obvious attempt to not come off as harsh, given the circumstances of clear torment between you, jungkook knew that this night was crucial. the two of you really needed to sell being a couple or face consequences that he couldn’t even imagine. this was your career at the end of the day and its fragile state laid in his hands.

so, before you knew it, the short ride was up and jungkook was greeted by the blinding lights of photographers at every angle possible, even before the car door was fully open. he knew to step out first and structure the perfect gentleman image, as this photo was surely going to be on every social media platform, every homepage, every magazine. the weight of the world rested on his shoulders and the only thing he could do was stretch a pearly white smile across his face.

“jungkook! jungkook, over here!” several reporters called out, ready like a cannon to fire away all the juicy questions in their arsenal since the relationship announcement.

throughout the past two weeks, the youngest member of bts wasn’t all that concerned with the actual publicity of the relationship. he was far too deep into grief to even consider the emotional toll that this new aspect of his job was going to have. he knew that he’d have to spend a generous amount of time with you, which was where the source of his anguish and guilt came from, but he nearly forgot how awful it was dealing with media in general. jungkook should have known that it was only going to get worse in the role he was now forced to play, as your public beau.

“jungkook! how’s y/n?” one reporter kept repeating over and over, wildly waving with one hand to get his attention.

another yelled, “jungkook, how does it feel to be the most searched term with y/n for fifteen days straight?”

while the screams were loud upon jungkook’s appearance, a hushed anticipation floated in the air. some expected other bts members to appear behind him. the crowd couldn’t even dream of the presence of jungkook’s newly official girlfriend, but as soon as one golden heel hit the velvet carpet, the floor nearly rumbled at the volume of yells.

this time, there was no choice but to hold a fixed gaze for longer than two seconds with one another, as your figure fully emerged from the limousine and met the blinding lights. the real job had begun and it was evident by the sudden smile mirrored on your face. it took jungkook aback, as he had been replaying your devastated expression at hotel azure over and over again for weeks. he was shackled to those memories of tears in your eyes - by the pool, in the elevator, at the bighit building.

“ready?”

it took a second to process that you were actually talking to him, as he did a double take. you arched a single, perfect eyebrow at him, as if he just told you a funny joke. one thing you always kept up was the fact that you insisted you were the funnier one out of the two of you, often playing the dynamic of a straight man that refused to laugh.

jungkook realized what you were doing - already portraying a different character for the cameras and it was one of a loving girlfriend that really wasn’t his. despite the heaviness in his chest, he had no choice but to play along, too.

he held out his arm for you and you gladly grasped it, looping your own through. although fans and reporters alike were still screaming at the top of their lungs, the touch of your hand on his arm nearly hurled jungkook back and to the ground. he forgot what it was like, to have your touch and to see your smile. moment one made him forget who he was and where he was, as if he was just yours once again.

this single, seemingly mundane, snapshot of the night was immortalized within jungkook’s mind. it was a second that transported him back in time, almost mockingly. he decided right then and there that he would be chasing these moments for as long as he could.

there was a certain fear that settled in jungkook’s skin, wondering if he would forever have to deal with your silence behind the scenes or suffering through forced touches in front of the cameras.

over time, it got better. when forced together in spaces like these, he was still too concerned with walking on eggshells around you to even try anything with you. he was too ashamed to talk to you, to laugh with you. there was always a safe distance between the two of you and jungkook made it a point to be as professional as possible.

the worst part was that he couldn’t read you at all. despite the fact that the two of you knew each other since you were practically kids meant nothing when the only face you wore was that of a stone cold expression. it drove jungkook crazy, especially when you so obviously feigned excitement or love when your job required you to. he watched puppet strings dictate every slight change of expression on your face and it felt like rocks in his stomach.

this safe distance was easy to maintain when watchful eyes of staff members lingered at every schedule - until they didn’t.

moment two, unlike moment one with you on the red carpet, was approached with fear and uncertainty. jungkook was ill-prepared this time around, having thought that he was looking forward to a rare friday night off when his phone and ms. choi demanded his presence across the city in less than twenty minutes. unlike the jungkook he knew in himself from even just a month prior, he wanted nothing to do with anything if it wasn’t involving laying down in his bed for the whole night.

deep down inside, he knew he wasn’t a party animal. it was nothing he yearned for, but instead, the idea of losing a bit of reality for even just a few hours. down some drinks here, take some pills there. that was the lifestyle he learned from his group of “friends.”

the “friends” was in quotations because there were a select few people in his life that openly declared themselves jungkook’s real friends - his group members, a handful of the 97 line, and others. they were in mostly opposition to the circle that jungkook ran in outside of the, which included bored chaebols, influencers, producers and club promoters with the world at the palm of their hand. they found jungkook to be a cute little idol that could be used for clout.

namjoon often warned jungkook about the people he surrounded himself with, but it was hard when they stuck to him like glue. it was as if he had his own little minions that enabled jungkook to do whatever he felt, as they crossed paths in every major city in the world. jungkook had his boys in los angeles, his connections in tokyo, the rich heirs of singapore. being constantly on tour and away from home was painful in every sense of the word, but he was able to numb it with the people around him.

that was the beginning of the end when it came to hurting when away from you.

surprisingly, jungkook avoided groupies. it was an easy trap for anyone blinded by the shining lights of fame to get lost in that world - maybe it had to do with his members and their own reservations regarding such a thing. while the company and management were strict, anyone could get their way if they were smart enough about it. regardless, it simply wasn’t the band’s prerogative to hook up with fans. instead, jungkook crumbled under pressure through other means.

it was a friday night like tonight, but he was certainly not laying down in bed. bts was in kyoto and celebrating their head choreographer’s birthday at a dingy, hole in the wall nightclub. the walls reeked of nicotine and it was so small that he couldn’t make two steps in either direction without crashing into someone. jungkook made this very mistake and that’s how she ended up falling into his arms. from there, they laughed it off, drank too much, and ended up in his bed by the end of the night.

the only reason why it even happened was because you uttered the words that jungkook thought he’d never hear: i hate you. the fight over the phone was about a multitude of things that was exacerbated by the distance placed between you two because of work and the fact that you were under the influence throughout the entire conversation, sipping on gin on the rocks as it progressed and became rowdy by the end of it as a result. you yelled the three words and hung up on jungkook, prompting him to also get completely wasted before attending the birthday party. he thought that was the end of it, as he heard the words that broke his heart in that moment. you were never one to pull your punches when it came to the harshness of your words, even calling him names in the past, but those three words were beyond anything else.

jungkook didn’t expect you to call him the morning after in tears, apologizing and wanting to make it right.

“dude, it’s not a big deal,” kelvin, one of jungkook’s buddies that was next in line to inherit some singaporean tech company, tried convincing him one night.

at this point, it’d been a few weeks after the affair and he was starting to feel the guilt building. the tour was about to end, which meant coming home to his girlfriend. the feelings only began to haunt jungkook at night, when he stared up at the ceiling of whatever hotel he was staying at that night. they scraped at his insides with metal forks and jolted his senses like electricity when he dwelled too long about the betrayal he committed.

“besides,” chimed in nina, another member of their inner circle that was sitting a little too close to jungkook. “you’ve been complaining about y/n for how long now?”

she was a tall and pretty model that looked like she was ready to pounce on the chance to be jungkook’s next hypothetical little secret. jungkook never looked at her like that, though. she’d been bordering on inappropriate closeness with him for nearing a year now and you had been warning him of this, which he ignored. then again, that was the way you were with every female that even breathed the same air as him.

admittedly, you were a bit possessive. for instance, there was no way in hell jungkook was allowed to have female friends while in a relationship with you. you had his location, he had yours - not because he was obsessive over it like you were, but because it only seemed fair. there were multiple instances of you picking fights with girls at parties or other social outings because they simply looked in jungkook’s direction. above all else, it was your way or the highway.

jungkook was a people pleaser and it was his fatal flaw that had an even weaker spot when it came to you. you were outgoing and some may call it flirtatious the way you cozied up to men and women. however, you were able to easily soothe your boyfriend with affectionate touches when he got riled up about it and that was that. it was certainly problematic that you were prone to interacting with others that would have upset yourself and that was one of the issues the two of you often fought about.

“i don’t complain about her,” jungkook began to scoff, but nina rolled her eyes at his response.

“every time you talk about her, it just sounds like you listing off all the ways how she controls your life,” she said. “just keep doing you.”

a few of the others in the group murmured in agreement. he and his friends were enjoying dinner at some fancy french restaurant that jungkook wasn’t particularly fond of, but went along for the sake of everyone else. in front of the entire group, kelvin decided to spill the beans about jungkook’s affair and of course, they all encouraged it. he was a star, everyone had some sort of little secret on the side. it was a rite of passage amongst celebrities, even. meanwhile, like namjoon, you hated his new friends and warned jungkook that they were full of trouble. it was all the more reason for them to validate his actions and encourage him to continue his affair, maybe even pick up on a few more, when they saw you as a nuisance.

kelvin continued, “like, come on. everyone does it. who cares if it keeps going?”

it made jungkook feel okay. besides, she was there and you were not. it wasn’t just convenient, it was too easy to create her into an outlet to get away from all his feelings and troubles that couldn’t be numbed with liquor and pills. he was able to forget about all the pressures of being an idol - the way his every move was being watched and how the entire world talked about him endlessly. he didn’t have to think so hard about his growing dependence on alcohol. he was able to forget how much he missed his family and the time he lost to be able to be a kid. jungkook was able to forget how much he missed you and how he wasn’t able to protect you from the harshness of real life - being away from each other, the stress of your respective careers, and everything in between. he knew it was wrong to keep going and there was no excuse, but he also knew he was a coward.

his cowardice is what found him in silence as he waited for you in front of your apartment complex tonight, as per the instructions given to him by mrs. choi, and the aforementioned moment two. these next three snapshots frozen in time would finally melt the ice that burned the deepest crevices of your heart: right now, the night in the hotel room during a snowstorm, and the day of your solo debut.

#jungkook fanfic #jungkook imagines #jungkook x reader #bts fic #kpop fanfic #jungkook scenarios #bts imagine #bts scenario #bts series #jungkook angst #jungkook series #jungkook x y/n #bts fanfic #kpop imagine #bts au #kpop scenarios #*** / through the mist.

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