#this has to be both therapeutic and a lil bittersweet

[howlsofbloodhounds]

I gave in

Enjoy <3333

BABY!! 🫵 they have matching big dark eyes

He’s so small could cradle him and rock him to sleep and sing him a lil lullaby

{ @signanothername }

[time-is-standing]

top 10 songs from july

for me, this month was all about love, hope, learning how to trust, pain, heartbreak and starting again.

1. Queerball by McCafferty

this song... I met a boy, who I thought I fell in love with. turned out, the situation is more complicated than that and we started going back and forth about our relationship. I listened to it on repeat after a special date and my brain just locked the two things together so I stopped listening to it after things took a turn for the worse.

2. Welcome to the Hell Zone Vague003 Remix

funny for this to be the second track. I started listening to this at the end of the month, when everything fell apart. I think I lost this boy, I got hurt a lot, betrayed by some 'friends', so I have to move out of our current apartment... so much is going on right now. all in all, it's an appropriate title for the feelings, I went through this month.

3. your favorite dress by Lil Peep, Lil Tracy

this song is quite important to me. it has something special in it, that hypes me up no matter what. I started listening to it when the love story was starting to form, but the love didn't end there with this song at least.

4. hostage by Billie Eilish

now this one... I am in love. absolutely. this is the best song ever, I keep listening to it on repeat. even though I only found it a few days ago, I am obsessed. the lyrics inspire me real bad, it's pure beauty (and a bit of pain, but I'm not suprised).

5. favorite crime by Olivia Rodrigo

I like Olivia's songs, but this is the only one that made it to my playlist. this is a calm, bittersweet one. I cried a decent amount listening to this song, especially after the so-called breakup.

6. rosier/punk2 by brakence

a masterpiece! at it's finest. listening to this with headphones and max volume... something else. it is the best thing ever, and the lyrics are making it even better. absolutely the best song ever, especially if you like the bass boost.

7. End of a good thing by Cory Wells

this is a pretty sad song. I cried to this as well, even though I listened to it when I didn't even have good things waiting to end. actually, I did but it's really hard to think about it. I had a crisis in last night's party just about this. I don't want to end the programming lessons because I don't want to stay alone again... and I just don't want to loose whatver I and my 'teacher' have at the moment. he was arguing with me, trying to hype me up but I know how hard it'll be when we stop. I will break into tiny pieces and I'm not sure if I can survive losing him. actually, I'm not sure if I can keep my pinky-promise I just made to him.

8. t r a n s p a r e n t s o u l by WILLOW, Travis Barker

this one is from a tiktok video things we have to if I remember right. nothing special, but a great song with cool lyrics. great to scream at the top of your lungs on a cloudy summer night. 10/10 would recommend.

9. Last night by Tom The Mail Man

it is a great song. there is so much more to the lyrics that you'd think when first listening to it. the lines "God, please make me better I wish I wasn't the way I am" hit way too hard. harder than a boy hit me last night. actually I'll tell the story in a different post, but last night a boy and I were just slapping each-other as a therapeutic thing. I have my problems with this boy but never thought he'd ever be this mad at me (in the best possible way, we both agreed and didn't really hurt each others). this song is somehow about our relationship, and I'm not proud of it.

10. Forever by Labrinth

and last, but not least, a chill one. I needed some rest this month, so much has happened. this is pure joy to listen to, euphoria's soundtrack is a masterpiece.