#this has happened on here and on insta and before. or they call me “daydreams”

[klance-daydreams]

genuinely me whenever someone calls me "dreams"

[dxrkluvie]

SHALL WE CHERRY?

JEAN K. x EREN x FEM READER

threesome 18+ smut

Full story available on my ao3. Click here.

Story name : " Shall we cherry? "

If you like my stories, please support me on insta --> @/llllenaj

You: I am bad at first impressions. 

Eren: Do you want me to drive you home?

 

You nodded and let him lead the way. When you reached his car, he held the door open for you. It made you blush lightly. 

When he sat down on the seat next to yours, his shirt lifted a little bit, revealing his well-toned abs. You looked away immediately. 

 

Eren: Are you okay?

You: Yes.

He started driving. The lights were reflecting on his face, you noticed how well sculpted it was. A few hairs were falling on his forehead. 

 

He was just so fine. 

 

You: How old are you? 

Eren: 19. And you?

You: Me too. Thank you for giving me a ride tonight. 

Eren: It's nothing. By the way, the offer still stands.

You: What offer?

Eren: Mushes and wee- WHO GAVE YOU YOUR FUCKING LICENCE FUCKING PIECE OF SCUM?- the boy yelled as the driver in front of you who took a right turn without flashing their indicators. 

You: If you don't cuss on the way, you're doing it wrong.

Eren: I would love to crucify those fuckers. 

You: I wonder if they paid their instructors. 

Eren: Perhaps.

You: I've never done shrooms. What is it like?

Eren: It depends on how much you take. Typically you see the colors a lot more vividly, they're A LOT brighter and sometimes they'd move. Also, you could get an intense body high. It enhances your feelings and messes with your head but in a very beautiful way. 

You: Oh, weird. Have your friends done it?

Eren: Yes. I am not into fake shit. Natural all the way, there's no such thing like dying from weed or mushes. UNLESS you've mistakenly picked the wrong shroom, but I'm not dumb. 

You: I don't know...

Eren: You don't have to be afraid, I will take care of you. 

You: Oh...- you looked down, blushing once more. Being all shy and mushy was so not you. But damn, this charming brat. 

The boy shook his head and looked for his parking spot.

You: Wait, we are here already?

Eren: I assume you were too busy daydreaming.

You: Oh, sorry. 

Eren's phone buzzed. It was a message from Armin saying: 

 

' Hello, Jean drove me home, I would appreciate it if you let me rest for a little while on my own and not come home yet as this whole gathering thing was too much for me. Thank you, Eren.' 

The boy texted back: 

 Okay, is Jean home though?

A: No, he went out.

E: Okay, rest well - he said and drifted away from the parking lot. - Change of plans. If you don't mind.

 

You: What happened? And I do not.

Eren: Something's up with Armin, he's just so sensitive like that. It will be fine. 

You: I don't feel like going home yet...

 

Eren: Where do you want to g- before he could finish, he received a call. It was Jean. 

 

J: Where the hell are you?

E: I should be asking the same. I am in the car with y/n. 

J: Armin kicked me out of the dorm. 

Eren rolled his eyes. 

E: I am not sure what we could do.

 

You, mouthing: Maybe we could try a motel?

 

E: Y/n is suggesting a motel, are you down?

J: Yeah, just give me the address whenever.

E: Okay, cool.

 

They hung up. The boy looked at you, his eyes were beyond stunning. - Why a motel? 

You: You know I am new here, I'd like to see what it is like outside of this city. Just curiosity. 

 

One of your fantasies was to have sex in a motel with a hot stranger. And today's events were working in your favor. You thought it was oddly romantic and you'd always make up fake scenarios in your head where this was happening.  You drove outside of the city for about half an hour. Eren was slowly losing patience. 

Maybe we could try this one? - he suggested, pointing out to a random building. 

You: Sure- you replied, googling the place- it has 4.7/5 stars and breakfast is included. $130 a night. 

Eren: Sure. - he said and got out of the car. Next, he opened the door for you and waited for you to get out, before locking it. 

You found those gestures cute.

When you entered the place, the receptionist gave you a weird look. It made you feel unwelcome. Eren did not bother reacting, he just took out his card out and tapped it on the pin pad.

Room #16 is for you - the old lady spoke - good night.

Eren: Night. 

You walked to the elevator.

It fascinated you how unbothered he was.

You: Did you see that?

Eren: She's probably sick of random teens renting a place to party/fuck, cause they don't have their own places yet. 

You laughed - I will give it to your cash. 

Jean called again. The phone call consisted of him asking for the location, and Eren simply giving it to him followed by the questions '' Should I bring cherries and alcohol? '' to which Eren answered ''yes'' and hung up. 

 

While you were walking past the other rooms, you could hear noises of all sorts. Sweet moaning, people fighting, loud music, and people yelling. 

Eren unlocked the door slowly. You stood behind him, carefully observing his hand movements. It was oddly arousing. His hands were big and had some veins slightly popping out. 

The smell of his expensive cologne was spreading into the air. He took his tie off and threw it across the room. The same happened to the hair tie that held his hair up. 

Neither of you was talking. 

You sat on the bed, and he did the same. Both of you had your backs turned on one another. 

15 minutes passed in silence when Jean suddenly opened the door with a bang. 

Jean: HELLOOOOOOOO!

Eren: Ew.

Jean: Get lost - the boy shook his head and placed the bag he carried with him on one of the nightstands- I brought what you wanted me to. 

Eren: So, shall we cherry? -  he asked, no one in particular. 

You: What is that? 

Jean: Kind of like a drinking game but not exactly. The rules are really simple. You dip a cherry in vodka and place it in-between your lips. The other person has to take the cherry without touching your lips OR they'll have to give you oral.

You looked away, squeezing your eyes and lips. 

Jean: All good?

Eren: It's fun. You don't have to, though.

Jean: Yeah if it's not something you think you could have fun with.

You: No I would actually try that.

Eren: Oh? - his tone changed. The boy took one of the already washed cherries. Jean handed him a plastic cup where he poured some vodka and dipped the fruit in it. He placed it on top of your lips and you aimed to eat it right away.

Jean: You broke the rule.

You: Fuck, I am sorry it wasn't intentional. 

Eren: It's okay. How did it taste?

You: Sweet and slightly bitter. 

His eyes narrowed at you. It almost looked like he was putting a lot of effort into getting the fruit in between his lips, that you've been dying to taste for a while.

You leaned closer to him and he purposefully pushed the cherry away with his tongue - Oh shit it fell. 

You: This was on purpose.

The boy placed his hand at the back of your head- I will give you a head if you want.

Jean: Can I join?

You nodded, embarrassed.

Another thing that has been a common fantasy of yours was to be fucked by two guys, but you never thought it would ever become reality.

Eren slid your right leg up. Jean did the same with your left one.

You laid on the bed, breathing heavily.

Jean lowered his voice, making it appear huskier - Relax, baby girl, you'll enjoy that tongue.

Eren lazily lifted your dress up, and Jean slid your pants down.

Both of them were taking turns to kiss on both of your thighs. You could feel your skin get more sensitive after every touch.

Blood rushed down and you felt warmth between your hips.

Jean spread your pussy open using his middle and index finger & Eren gave your throbbing clit a slow teasing lick.

Jean: She's getting wetter it's so hot.

Eren: I know.

This small dirty talk was causing your thirst for them to grow.

Eren: She is dying to get her hole licked, aren't you, y/n?

You let out a loud ' yes ' & shortly afterward you felt both of their tongues lick up and down on both of your pussy lips.

It made your toes curl.

Eren's finger started to slowly pump in and out of your hole as Jean's tongue was eagerly gliding up and down on your wet cunt.

The room got filled with your sweet " ah's " and "oh's".

At one point you felt both of their tongues battling one another across your clit and it was nearly leaving you breathless. 

The boys stopped and looked up at you.

Eren: Have you done this before?

You: As in a threesome?

He nodded. You replied with a '' no '. 

Eren: How is it going so far?

You: Amazing. I actually want to return the favor. 

Both of them stood up. 

Now you were off the bed, kneeling before them. You could see the lust in their eyes. Especially Jean's. 

Both of your hands took a place on both of their dicks. They were gently stroking them as your mouth was giving them licks and sucks on their tips, going from Jean's cock to Eren's back and forth, in a pattern. 

One thing you've noticed was that Eren was tenser, his body language was more indicative. He was rock hard, his pupils were dilated and he was thrusting in your mouth slightly when given the chance. 

As for Jean - he was more vocal. He'd let out some quiet groans here and there and you would occasionally hear some ' fuck yes '.

Eren: Go lay down. 

You did as ordered.

Jean: Hold on - the boy said and laid down first, leaning against the bed frame - you can lay on me.

You hesitated for a bit. Eren walked up to you, lifted your chin up, and kissed you. His hands slid down to your boobs and squeezed them gently. His thumbs massaged on your nipples. It made you wetter. 

" Okay... " you said and crawled on top of him, having him face your back. 

Jean placed his hand around your neck and kissed on it - Have you done anal? - he asked, whispering. 

You: No. 

Jean: Would you be interested? 

You: Yes. 

He placed his thumb on your lips, you licked it. 

Jean: Shitt...- he grunted and slid both of his hands down on your body, as yours were surrounded his, supporting your whole upper half. Your legs spread open and Eren made his way to you once again. 

His lips were on top of your clit, sucking and licking on it. 

His thumb moved down to your asshole and he carefully massaged on it in circles. He stopped for a second and looked at you - I am going to insert it in... - the boy spoke quietly while doing so.

Your body tensed up. You felt full but in a good way.

To your pleasant surprise, he was good at giving oral and a bit more gentle than his friend was.

Jean: Should I stick it in? I want to fuck you so hard, y/n.

You: Go for it.

Eren got on top of both of you. He leaned forward to give you a passionate kiss. He did the same to Jean. You noticed how attractive he looked up-close.

You: Fuck that's so hot...

Eren's cock slid inside your wet pussy as for Jean's, in your back entrance. Slowly.

You moaned as both of them started to push themselves inside you.

Eren was about an inch and a half bigger than Jean. It made you leak. He smirked - You're that wet for me?

You: Yes - you whispered against his lips and kissed him.

Both of them started thrusting inside your holes at a quicker pace.

You moaned loudly and leaked a bit more.

The pressure was building up rather quicker than you expected it to as your sweet spots were stimulated at the same time.

You: Fuck I'll squirt all over you.

Eren stopped moving and placed his lips on your neck, slowly kissing down on you.

His tongue teased your nipples. They hardened even more. Every touch of his, or Jean's was making your skin more sensitive.

The view of you and Eren indulging made Jean stop for a second as well and enjoy the show.

Your hips moved against Eren's.

He bit on your lower lip - That eager, huh?

You: Yes...

Jean's hands were firmly holding your butt, viciously slamming it down on his while Eren was filling you up from the front.

You were nearly reaching your climax and soon you squirted.

Both of them mentioned how hot this was.

You giggled a bit. - I am pretty sure we will ruin the mattress.

Eren: Who gives a shit...

Jean: Y/n...

You: Yes?

Jean: Can I cum in you?

You: Yeah...it should be okay.

Eren stopped and took a chair, sitting in front of both of you.

Jean used you for his own pleasure, as for Jaeger - for his entertainment.

He began to jerk off to the view of you being fucked.

Your hole was tight and it made Jean cum instantly.

Eren: Oh shit... -

You: Can I get off? - you asked Jean.

He said ' yes '. Before leaving though, you gave him a kiss, which he returned.

Next, your lips transferred to Eren's. He held the back of your head. Your fingers ran through his hair. Your eyes locked.

You: Do you need help?

Eren: Sure.

Once again, you kneeled down. Your tongue licked on his whole length. Your mouth was on his balls now, taking each one in as your hand was stroking him.

His breathing got heavier and his precum leaked.

You: Are you enjoying that?

Eren: Very much so fuck...

You: Cum for me, Eren.

The boy grunted and shot out a few loads - Enough! - he said and gently pushed you away.

You looked at him.

Eren: You should try sex on shrooms, it makes everything × 10 better.

You: I don't see why I wouldn't.

You blushed. Both of your wildest dreams have combined in one in just one night and you felt somewhat satisfied. Both- sexually and emotionally.

Eren: How are you accepting what just happened?- the boy asked as he stood up and handed everyone a tissue.

[blackreesemajic]

Social Distancing with a New Flame

         ✨💕 You just met a new boo and just when the vibes started flowing boom* 💥 💥 the world shuts down and quarantine is turned on. The honeymoon phase should be the time you and your person are going on dates, boo’d up in public, holding hands, and sucking each other's face every second of the day.  😘😘😘

Your mind is filled with a plethora of in-person activities y’all can be doing during this time to make the butterflies in your stomach flutter like they just popped a perk.

If your situation is anything like mine, You may feel like your coochie was just put on 90-day probation without your consent. Thank you to the reviews of Steve Harvey’s, “Act like a Lady, Think like a man.” And his toxic masculinity perpetuated in his book,  I would have read it and MAYBE had been better prepared for THIS situation. 

Remember, although times are hard right now it’s not always about sex! Your peach  🍑 may be yearning for that eggplant  🍆 but 30-90 days is not. that. long... of a wait to be intimate with someone. 

You could be like one of those people who wait until marriage…

No shade, but I am not one of those people.  

I’m the, “Bring that ass here boi!” type of people. 

The CDC recommends that we “Stay Calm” during this time quarantine.

 It sounds unrealistic to me.  😒

 How can we stay calm when our sexual desires are all over the place. 

There are three things we are ALL doing during this time if we are not daydreaming about the outside land. 

We spend all day bouncing that ass from Insta to Facebook, Twitter to Tumblr then back to Insta again…

 Log on to our ex’s Netflix account and be entertained by the white Trashery of Tiger King and then see the same trashery in the White House to remind us the world has gone straight to SHITS... 

Lastly, switching to Private mode on our phones and visiting pornhub.com or xvideos.com to see who is offering the best free subscription. 

 Trust me, I’m right there with you! 

 Just because social distancing is in effect does not mean you have to distance your heart. 

Let’s use this time to get to know each other on a personal level. 

Isolation could be causing your energies to yearn for one another louder than ever. You may even have a heightened craving of intimacy during this time. This time in quarantine can be beneficial to your dating life if you consider yourself someone who is, “Shy or Introverted” or are attracted to people who are. Many people with introverted personalities would prefer getting to know each other over the phone or on a virtual date. This is the time to bring back genuine connections, open and honest conversations, and my ALL TIME FAVORITE… Falling asleep on the phone. 

[[Pieces of Reese: If he in quarantine at “his crib” but can only talk to you during certain hours or when he steps outside… He in quarantine with someone else, sis. LET HIM GO! ]]   🔑 😒

Here are some tips to keep the flame lit, tea hot, and coffee dripping down your lips. So that when you and your new boo do get back together the connection is stronger than ever!

1.     Self Healing and Reflecting: I know. I know. You were so excited because you feel like you could have finally met your “PERSON”. And now, You can’t even see them in-person. Your mind starts to ponder so many “What the fucking Ifs!” “What if they get bored with me?” “What if they lose interest?” “What if they have multiple quarantine boo’s”  “What if they catch corona and die?!!!” I know it sounds fucking crazy but its a real fucking fear.  You must remember that FEAR stands for False Evidence Appearing Real!

I NEED YOU TO IMMEDIATELY; Reset your mind and Refocus yourself. 

Now is the time you must remind yourself that “YOU ARE THAT BITCH!” Use this time to get to know you. Get healthy Physically, Mentally, and Emotionally... If being in a relationship/ situationship is what you desire at the end of all of this. Use the time to make yourself WHOLE. Thou can’t pick up broken glass without cutting the hand that is trying to put the pieces back together.  

[[ “We don’t fear being alone. We fear getting to know the parts of ourselves we didn’t know before.” - Pieces of Reese ]]

 Pick up a pen and paper and write: Write a letter to yourself. Write in your diary. Write to your person. Write your feelings. Write yourself daily affirmations and post them on your bathroom mirror so that you see them every day. Get connected with the feelings behind your everyday thoughts.

Set a routine; Whatever the routine looks like to you, set it! There is no amount of work you need to force yourself to meet society’s sense of productivity. The routine is only in place to keep your body prepared for what the universe has to offer you once this is all done.

2.       Virtual Dates: It seems crazy but having a virtual date can be romantic and is also cost-efficient. If you or your partner want to be extravagant you can rotate turns ordering the other person a meal (Be sure to leave your delivery person a decent tip for working through these hard times). You can both go into your own kitchens and cook each other your favorite meal. Make something you will want your person to try when you are in one space. Try describing the taste of the meal, who taught you how to make it, and why it is your favorite. Adding wine or alcohol loosens things up and being alone could make you more comfortable with being yourself on the date. A great website to get the conversation going: www.goalcast.com/2018/04/19/deep-questions-to-ask-your-partner/amp/ 

3.   Share what you see: If you are a lover of music, videos, Memes, or GIFs, Do NOT be afraid to share it with your person. With everything that is happening in the world currently, Now is the perfect time to make someone smile and laugh. Remember that MENTAL HEALTH is real! For people who suffer from Mental Health Illness, forced isolation calls for undesired thoughts of not being wanted. Show your person they are the first person you thought of when you have seen or heard something. Make them feel like, you couldn’t wait to send it to them. Let them know they are not alone during this time. You are their person   

4. If you are adventurous: Video or Phone sex has never got anyone left on READ. It actually gets you a callback.

 It's safe, sexy, and Kinky AS FUCK! Call your friends who love BDSM to teach you a thing or two. Virtual sex allows you to push the boundaries between you and your partner. It makes each person excited for what's to come when you are in one space. 

You can set the mood for your virtual hook up by lighting candles, having your space neat, camera angles must be on point,  and start off with a striptease to get the eggplant ripe and keep the peach juicy. 

Playing a ”If I miss, I Strip. If you miss, You strip.” [if you know, you know ❤️ + 🏀 ] type of game may relax you and your partner. Of course, Make it specific to you and yours. Don’t forget to have your #BlackReeseMajic music playlist ready. If you don’t have a music playlist visit my apple music/ Spotify to follow any of mine  

5.    Lastly, Optional, and specific for my Spiritual Souls who believe in the power of Manifestation: ✨💕✨💕✨💕

[You do not have to have a person already to do this step. If you are someone hoping to find your quarantine boo or keep the one you have then this is for you]

 Step One: is to start by writing out everything you want in your person. Qualities, Attributes, Values, and Looks (if you believe in detail). Remember to write out how you want to be treated by your person. If you want to go the extra step. You can write what ‘You’ will be able to offer to your person. Once you have produced the person you desire in the concrete sense,

 Step Two: is to call on your spirits guides, ancestors, and higher power to bring forth your ask. Some things you may need to connect with the spiritual realm but are not required are 1.Pink Candle (Pink candles personify the purest form of love, a love without selfishness with selfless emotions, are ideal for the beginning of a relationship), 2. Herbs or Essential oils [if you have] have a centuries-long history of symbolizing love and devotion (Lavender, Rose, Basil, Calendula...etc). 3. Sage: “Sage is known to have healing properties and with the power of intention and spiritual connection with the source of all existence, the burning of Sage assists with healing and clearing.” 4. Offering: Clean and freshwater is the simplest form of offering. You can also offer coins, jewelry, fruits, anything appealing to the spirits. 5. Bell or anything that makes noise (can be your voice) 

And Step Three: Have a table or space specific for intentions or manifestation. With a clear mind, body, and soul begin my thanking creation for all that you already have. I like to place my “person desires” list under my pink candle. I sprinkle my herbs around and inside my candle. I  use a couple of drops of my essential oils for fragrance (Spirits love good smelling things). I make my spiritual space as pretty as possible (Glitter is enticing to spirits and crystals deepens the vibrations). I give the offering (usually freshwater, money, or coins). I chant (Chanting is specific to you. If you need help with a chant I usually say, “All praises to the most high. God, Spirits, Creation, and Ancestors, I thank you for everything you have done and everything you continue to do. I offer you my purest self and this alter to bring forth my ask…”  I burn my sage (smell, clarity, and guidance to myself and spirits), and finally, I light my pink love candle.

 I let my candle burn for a whole day or I light it every day for a few hours then blow it out.   

I hope this tea has filled your soul the way writing it has filled mine. Stay at home if you can and stay safe during this time. 

If you are someone who lost a loved one from complications of COVID19, I pray for healing and peace over your life. I am sending EACH and every one of you Light and Love from the depths of my soul. 

Spread Light and Love Every day! ✨💕

PEACE & Be The.      

    Sincerely, Pieces of Reese

Sources: 

https://www.miracleswithinus.com/the-spiritual-side-of-sage.html

https://dontmesswithmama.com/essential-oils-for-romance-love/

https://www.thespruce.com/herb-meanings-in-love-and-romance-1761964

https://www.sisterlove.org/post/keeping-it-safe-and-sexy-covid19

[a-simple-imagine]

Charity Gala

Requested by Anonymous: Could you maybe do a skyler samuels x reader imagine where r is an actress/dancer and they are friends with benefits? Everyone considers r to be a player since they are naturally very flirty but they only like skyler and she likes them too? And maybe confessing feelings and fluff/smut after a gala or something?

Pairing: Skyler Samuels x reader

Words: 884

A/N - This all takes place at the gala rather than after. I know i took forever but i did like I said I would. 

"It'll be fine."

"I feel like I'm gonna throw up." You reply although you're embellishing.

"You're being dramatic."

You nod a little, a hint of a smile on your lips. "Always but no. You know I've been trying to avoid the media and this is basically an invitation for bad press. They hate me enough at the moment."

"They don't hate you, they just think you're a little.... overly friendly with people." She chuckled. "And they're not wrong, y/n."

"I'm flirty but that's it. They make it out like I hook up with everyone I glance at."

"You don't?" She gasps playfully, eyes wide. "And here I thought you were easy."

"For you." You gently place your hand on her cheek. "Always."

"Cute." She pulls you into a kiss. "Now come on,"

Skyler takes your hand and pulls you out of the car. Blinded by the flash of cameras; You could see the headlines already. You walk alongside with the blonde, posing for photographers along the way. People calling both your names, trying to get the best shot to make the most money. You make the walk as quickly as possible without trying to seem like you're in a rush.

"Can I get you a drink, m'lady?" Skyler asks.

"Oh- I... what do people drink at these things?" You wonder, brow furrowed. "Champagne?"

"Really? You want champagne?"

"God no tastes like piss it just seems fancy."

"Just for that I'm gonna get you one."

Before you have a chance to counter, she was heading towards a waitress away. Meanwhile, you merge with the main crowd, walking around admiring the glitz and glam of Hollywood. You worked on TV, a dance show to be specific but you never quite thought of yourself as famous. Not in the slightest. You pull out your phone from your clutch and take a very quick video for Instagram. Where you even here If you don't put it on insta?

"There you are, thought you might have run off on me," You turn to her and she hands you a champagne flute. "here,"

"Thank you," A brief pause. "So how long do we have to be here before we can go?"

"It's been like ten minutes, Y/N, at least give it a little while longer."

"I hate social events." You take a sip of the champagne. It wasn't terrible but you exaggerate your disgusted reaction.

"Where else would you get to show off such a beautiful outfit?" Skyler replies softly. Motioning up and down. You give her a little twirl.

"I do look good." You nod in agreement. "You look amazing by the way. Have I told you that?"

"Yes like 4 times tonight."

"And it's still true. Is it possible that you've somehow gotten prettier?" You tease.

"And that's why everyone thinks you're a player."

"Because I said you're pretty?"

"You tell everyone they're pretty."  She insists, taking your hand. "Now relax and just embrace the whole charity gala experience."

"I do not." You grumble. Pulling your hand away so you can cross your arms and pout. "Do you reckon all these people are like loaded?"

"Probably a fair few, yeah."

"That's cool." You announce, Y/E/C eyes scanning the crowd. "The ideal place to find a sugar daddy."

"Definitely." She agrees. "I found the perfect guy for you," She points to a random old man, dressed in a black tux. Hunched over the can in his hand.

"Yeah." You nod. "He looks like he's on his death bed, I'd get all his money faster."

"That's so morbid." The blonde chuckles.

"I'm sorry but do you expect me to live the rest of my life with him? Quicker he's gone, the quicker I become rich."

"You never know, you could fall in love."

You shake your head firmly. "Won't happen. My heart belongs to someone else."

"You've gotta stop imagining Brie Larson will fall in love with you one day."

"Not her." You insist with an amused smile. Although you wouldn't say no.

"Then who? Chris Hemsworth is married."

"As much as I would love for Chris to come sweep me off my feet. I wasn't talking about my daydreams."

"Oh," She seems surprised. "Never thought I'd see the day. Whose got you so smitten then?"

"Just some pretty blonde, I know. She's wonderful. She's an actress actually. Very down to earth. Real sweet too" You take a casual sip of champagne. Watching her carefully to figure out her reaction.

"She sounds... great."

"She is." You nod. "And I secretly know she's very jealous right now."

"What? She has no reason to be, we're just friends after all."

"Friends... who fuck."

"Still," the blonde shrugs.

"How can someone be so oblivious." You announce. Her brows furrow.

"I'm talking about you."

"Me?"

"No the other you. Of course, I mean you." You roll your eyes. "I may be flirty as hell but at the end of the day you're the one I go running to." You pause briefly to gauge reaction. " If this is weird tell me now because I'm more than happy to just awkwardly leave and pretend this never happened."

"You... like me?"

You nod. You're not embarrassed by your feelings; not even a little.

"But I thought-"

"I like you, Skyler. A lot."

"I... like you too."

[annie-m-lima-blog]

My first book review! Yay!

So I wanted to start a new ritual where I review books that I’ve read. Being perfectly honest here, I’m not a big reader. I used to read everything I could get my hands on, but that is a long forgotten habit. I now need an obligation to force myself to pick up books again.

….And you want to be a writer?

Yes, I know. But I read a book! It was just a terrible one. And now I’m upset because my first review is going to be a rant thinly disguised as something...else? Maybe?

Anyway, “What Are You Afraid Of” by Alexandra Ivy.

Outlines, well-developed characters, and a thesaurus. Obviously.

Ok, so this is a crime novel. I picked it up for some tips on how to drag out the suspense. My Zootopia novel (about cops chasing criminals) quite frankly needs all the help it can get. However, I discovered some important don’ts rather than do’s here so let's write those down (yes, I am aware of how salty I sound right now.) (Also spoilers)

Don’t make carbon copy characters: the Main Character, Carmen, and her love interest, Griffin, are one in the same. Carmen is a gorgeous woman. Griffin has a rockin’ bod. Carmen is a driven journalist. Griffin is a skilled software developer. She made bank off her book about serial killers. He made bank off of the FBI for the software to catch serial killers. (This is how they met by the way) She watched her mom get shot. He watched his mom get shot. See where I’m going with this? I understand that a love interest needs to have stuff in common with the MC but this made them seem plain and boring. No insta love: Especially when they start off having a major conflict. She used him to get information for her book. He was furious about that for months leading up to the start of the book. The second he sees her all that melts away by the steaming, hot, lustful thoughts he has about her body and suddenly she’s perfect, and he would protect her with his life. This happened all in the first 100 pages. Which made the second 264 pages that much harder to read. This scary suspense story was halted several times to mention how hot they thought each other was and in the middle of all the drama they have sex. Like a lot. Being chased by crazed maniacs is apparently a huge turn on for these guys. But on the plus side, she can write a decent sex scene. Outlines are your friends: I understand that these types of stories are supposed to give you plot twists. I was not expecting whiplash. The premise of the novel was pretty intriguing. The book that she wrote was a nonfiction documentation of five serial killers and their victims. So when she got an envelope filled with pictures of women with their heads bashed in, she suspected that it was old pictures from one of the serial killers she interview. It was his M.O. after all so that’s pretty believable. It wasn’t until she noticed that these women weren't mentioned in her interview with the killer that she started to feel uneasy. Notice that the prologue was a gruesome death scene so I know that a) the pictures are real and b) the killers raped the woman before they killed her. I mention this because Carmen believed that the pictures were faked. Sometimes. She flipped back and forth between the “are they real or are they not” thing through 2/3rds of the book. That coupled with the fact that the “maybe they’re fake” argument only went as far as to vaguely mention the thought every few pages made it more of an annoyance than a note of suspense. Secondly. Carmen is a thin, blonde white woman - the victims are also thin, blonde, white women. It is one of the important factors showing that this is not the original killer and is, in fact, a copycat killer(s)(They don’t know there is more than one killer for most of the book). The killer she interviewed was notorious for not being picky about his women. One who reads the back of the book knows this is the way to signify that the copycat is Carmen’s stalker...because they said so. However, Griffin took a look at these pictures and immediately assessed that she was being targeted. There was no build up, no major revelation. Can the killer not just have a preference? We KNOW he’s having sex with them. So it makes it utterly gross when they try and finger her uncle for the crimes. Her uncle’s motivation isn’t even sexual. This wasn’t a crazy plot twist. It was bad writing. Speaking of her uncle’s motivation; he secretly stole her inheritance when her father shot her mother and then himself. Firstly, how? It was 3 million dollars. So nobody outside of her parents and her uncle knew about that? She sure didn’t. She’s an heiress to a line of grocery stores, and she never got any money. She never questioned any of this? Furthermore, he’s coming out of the woodwork now that her book sold. Why? Griffin said that it was because she now had money for lawyers but she doesn’t know about the inheritance and never spoke to her uncle so...why would he bother? It seems to me like it would cause more attention to himself to stir stuff up now. Right before the big climax for two pages, the author put in a countdown of victims for the five killers. So, the killers killed five women like the first killer, four like the second killer, three like the third killer. It would be intimidating but on the next page Carmen gets kidnapped, and the timeline gets messed up. Note that this wasn’t mentioned anywhere in any of the snippets from the killers pov either. The author just threw this in last second just to neglect it. Not a plot twist. Don’t let the climax suck: She gets captured. The killer unceremoniously revealed himself as her housekeeper’s son. The guy was mentioned maybe three times all together and had two lines in the entire book. He thinks that her father was his father and that they were related, confirming the creepy incest vibe. This wasn’t set up at all but really and truly I should have seen this coming because the only two things I know about her father were contradictory to each other. I know that he adored his wife and that he killed his wife. Ronnie (the brother) admitted that he was the one who killed both her parents in a rage over being denied as the son. To cope with the trauma Carmen ….suppressed the knowledge that Ronnie was there and only remembered seeing the bodies of her parents? Because someone she admits to not knowing well killing her parents is more traumatic than her father killing her mother? That is most certainly NOT a plot twist. Then the author decided to write a plot twist inside of a plot twist creating a weird plot twist inception. It turns out that Ronnie was fed information by Carmen’s cousin to make him believe that he was Carmen’s brother. He's not, but the cousin wanted to drive Carmen's father away to protect the company from going bankrupt. Because he was worried about this at 15? Why did he even think that Carmen's father would back away from his only source of income over that? This cousin, let’s call him Ted because I already forgot his name, was part of Ronnie’s team and decided to tell him all of this after Griffin showed up to save Carmen, during their daring escape. Was there not a more convenient time to do this? Really? Do you have to do this right now? At least he killed Ronnie, forcing the author to stop calling him “unstable” and “insane” every few lines. Yes, I get it. You don’t have to tell me 23 times in 10 pages. Finally, they did the classic “Tim pulled a gun on Carmen so Griffin pulled a gun on Tim” fiasco. Law and Order SVU taught me that if you shoot the guy who has a gun on your friend his reflexes will pull the trigger on your friend. So I don’t care what the author says, Carmen’s dead. Reality doesn’t just stop because you want it to. Don’t add bad plot twists in the epilogue: After this is over, Griffin starts driving to Carmen’s uncle’s house while daydreaming about marrying Carmen (a whopping three weeks after their first meet) He storms into his office and makes a show of threatening the dude for Carmen’s inheritance. (You just said you’d marry her. You’re a millionaire. Why does it matter?) He admits to having it and agrees to repay her. He also admits to trying to run them off the road into a ravine that one time. So he’s a wannabe killer now too. Cool. You just tied up loose ends. STILL not a plot twist.

Those were all just the “big issues” I had with the story. The writing annoyed me too. I was told the same information 18 hundred times throughout the story. The clues were also unceremoniously thrown in as question that a character asked him(her)self. Every time. Also, I head hopped the entire time. We get Carmen’s, Griffin’s and Ronnie’s pov’s. We also got pov’s of three of the victims. It was overly disjointed and seemed smashed together.

Decent point: Those death scenes in the pov of the victim who was getting killed was admittedly pretty chilling. Kudos.

….I don’t have a way to end this...so bye? I guess? I’ll be reading Stephen King’s “Carrie” next. So hopefully my next review will be a happier one.