#this has been in my drafts for forever and i remade it like three times. eventually i just gave up trying to color these :(

[normasshearer]

AUDREY HEPBURN & CARY GRANT in CHARADE (1963) dir. Stanley Donen

+ BONUS

[psychotickol-a]

RULES.

DISCLAIMER

I am not, nor am I affiliated with, Nathaniel Buzolic or the CW shows, the Vampire Diaries and the Originals, or L.J Smith’s books. The blog was created for entertainment purposes only and is entirely non-profit. I do not own the character that I’m choosing to write on this account, but this blog is canon divergent.

I have altered the Original Family’s timeline, origins and history significantly, you can read an indepth explanation of the changes that I’ve made here or you can read the following bullet points.

CANON DIVERGENT

THE ORIGINAL FAMILY IS OLDER: they began their lives in Norway at the beginning of the Viking Age (790 AD), and were born and raised within the Viking culture and worship.

ANSEL WAS A SAXON SLAVE: taken during the Viking raids on England, the same as Esther and Dahlia.

KOL WAS TWENTY FOUR: when Esther turned her children into the first vampires. Kol was already renown for his bloodthirst and savagery in battle.

MARRIAGE: Kol married when he was fifteen years old to Siv but fathered no children.

KOL & FINN: they were a lot closer than the show portrayed as they were both left out of the “always and forever” schtick. What was more, Finn’s presence tempered Kol’s impulsiveness and anger whilst Kol’s playful nature and mischief often led Finn to seeing the simple pleasures of life.

THE SILAS ARC: Kol wasn’t killed. Elena, Jeremy and Bonnie trapped Kol within a prison world and used his sirelink to kill over a hundred vampires from Kol’s sireline but the majority of his sireline still exists.

FOLLOWING HIS FAMILY TO NEW ORLEANS: Kol astral projected to converse, tutor and mentor Davina Claire during season 1 of the Originals.

ESTHERS RETURN: Esther did attempt to use Kol’s resentment and bitterness towards his siblings as leverage to get him to work for her but Kol refused. Esther cut him off from Davina until she managed to bring him back temporarily in which Kol confronted his siblings but was eventually forced to return to his prison.

DAVINA CLAIRE: Kol and Davina still share a deep connection but my Kol is aromantic and is incapable of feeling romantic love for anyone. He is fond of Davina and cares for her but he can’t love her, therefore Kol is not married to Davina.

KOL’S DOES NOT DIE: After confronting his siblings, Kol was forced to return to his prison world or risk being torn apart. Davina had to work with the Strix to bring Kol back to the real world but the ancestors still cursed him into killing Davina.

FREYA, HAYLEY & HOPE: Kol has mixed feelings about the three. He tolerates them but struggles to see either of them as family. What he feels for them is obligation, though he does make more of an effort with Hope than the other two (this may change with roleplay).

MUN INFORMATION

I’m Chey, I’m 21+, queer and a woman of colour. This blog has been remade from my previous blogs under the same url psychotickol as I was feeling nostalgic and missed writing Kol. I’m a slow roleplayer so if you’re looking for someone who is quick with replies and is active every day I may not be the partner for you. Icons were capped and edited by me with the borders taken from destroyalist.

I have no triggers but I will not write rape, pedophilia, anything to do with pregnancy or eating disorders. I will also not partake in any nazi au’s or gender bent / rule!63 muses.

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT

OOC DRAMA: I prefer not to get involved with other peoples personal problems with other roleplayers however, if I say or do something that upsets you, please feel free to message me so that I can apologize or explain as sometimes things can be misconstrued over the internet. Posting passive aggressive ooc posts to drag your entire follower count into something that could have been handled privately is immature and I will not take part in it nor will I tolerate having those kinds of people in my life.

PATIENCE: As I said above, I am incredibly slow and scatterbrained but I’m laid back and I do not mind how long it takes for my partners to reply or respond to me so please take as long as you want or need. If you are worried that I haven’t seen a reply / starter, feel free to send me a message and I’ll let you know if I have it tucked away in my drafts.

FOLLOWERS: If we’re mutuals then I’m going to assume that means that I can IM you, send you memes and write you starters on a whim without needing to plot or discus everything before hand. However, YOU DO NOT HAVE TO REPLY TO THESE!! Nor do you have to tell me if you’re going to reply or not, this is a no stress zone and you are not under any obligations to do anything that you do not want to or are not inspired to do.

TRIGGERS: As I mentioned, I personally do not have triggers but I will do my utmost to tag any and all kinds of triggering content. The dominant triggers that you will find on this blog are blood, violence, gore, face / eye horror, nudity, death, depression and other psychological issues / behavior. I will do my best to tag them. If I miss a tag or you have a specific tag then please let me know.

SHIPPING: This is a multi-ship account, I love building and developing relationships and seeing where things go. But sometimes muses simply do not click romantically, sometimes the spark or the feeling isn’t there and this is okay. I will never force a ship onto my partners, if you feel that I am pushing too hard for something then let me know and I’ll back off. That being said, my Kol is AROMANTIC, as I mentioned above, and he will never fall in love with your muse. He may care for and grow fond of your muse but romantic love is off the table.

SMUT: Both mun and muse are of age however smut continues to be the most challenging genre for me to write so please do not be surprised or upset if I time skip or fade to black should our muse become sexually involved. I will not roleplay or discuss smut or sexual relationships with minors.

MUTUALS ONLY: This account will be mutuals only as I do not have as much free time as I used to have and I want to focus my attention on those who wish to write with me, and who I wish to write with as well. I will occasionally post open starters for non-mutuals as I find that is a good way to meet / find new people.

MEMES: will be open to non-mutuals as they are good ice breakers but I will be selective with them.

PRE-ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIPS: I’m okay with pre-established relationships as long as we talk and discuss ooc together to really flesh out what their past relationships were like and then move on from there.

Thank you for taking the time to read through these, even if you just skimmed over them :) if anything is unclear please do not hesitate to message me.

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

WAD LIAO - DRAFT

Something was definitely going on with Lance, something that was more than simple tiredness. Lance wouldn't even look him in the eye after talking him through how to perform a scan with the castle's equipment. Keith hadn't seen anything wrong with Lance, still he'd gone ahead and set up an IV line for his mate, staying by his side until the sedatives had kicked in and Lance was out cold. Normally Lance didn't require sedatives to sleep, but Keith had a feeling his mate would insist on dragging himself up to the bridge to wait for the others if he hadn't administer under the guise of painkiller for Lance's still aching head. From the moment the machine stopped it's scan, right up to the moment Lance fell asleep, his mate stared across the room at their son's on the other bed. Maybe Lance was just trying to calm his omega down? He said it was feeling clucky... did that mean Lance wanted more pups already? He said he couldn't go through birth again, so Keith had kind of accepted that the twins might be the only children they'd have, and he'd made peace with that. Lance's health and safety came first, as well as the fact it was Lance's body, so at the end of the day, his mate had full control of what happened to it... it just confused him that Lance was bringing it all up again after going on a mission with Lotor and Shiro, both of which had slept with his mate at some point... well Lotor was a maybe, he'd definitely touched Lance, but neither of them knew how far he'd taken it.

 Leaving Lance sleeping, Keith carried the boys up to the bridge. With their energetic movements, the last thing they needed was for one of the pups to fall from the bed, or even worse, for them both too and be seriously hurt. Allura, Coran and Krolia were all standing, waiting for Pidge, or Hunk to call through

"Any news?"

"No. How's Lance?"

"He's sleeping in the medical bay, despite being in the pod, he's still a little uncomfortable"

"Nothing too bad, I hope"

"No Coran, thanks to all your help, we now know how to work the scanner and nothing came up on his scan"

"Are you sure? I mean, Coran is the expert when it comes to scans"

"That's true, but Lance and I didn't see anything"

If Keith was honest, he was just going off of Lance's previous scans and was no expert like Coran, but the scanner hadn't highlighted anything

"Perhaps it would be best to conduct another scan once Lance wakes"

"He'll be out for a while, I gave him a shot for pain... that was actually a sedative. He would have wanted to wait for Pidge, Hunk and Matt if I hadn't, he also said that Shiro and Lotor didn't hurt him. So once they've returned, we can release them"

"So do we just wait?"

"You can go ahead and call Pidge and Hunk, I doubt they'll be discussing anything too exciting"

Moving over to his console, Coran went about calling their three friends. Pidge's face filled her half the screen, while Hunk looked somewhat more relaxed

"Hey guys! How's Lance?!"

"He's good. He's sleeping at the moment, Hunk"

"I'm surprised you got him to sleep"

"Keith drugged him"

"Mum, you don't need to dob me in"

"Well you did"

Forcing an exerted sigh, Keith had no idea why his mother insisted on telling everyone 

"What does it look like?"

"We're just arriving, here let me switch view"

The scene in front of them was floating chunks of earth

"Well. It's gone. I don't see how anyone could have survived this, and we aren't reading any life signs in the area"

"Though we are getting some unusual energy readings"

"Unusual?"

"It's emitting the signals one would have expect from a black hole, and radiation is continuing to rise"

"There's no way she could have survived?"

"No. Nothing could have survived, and there's no trace of that black goop or pure quintessence"

"Alright, take as many readings are you and then fall back. We'll need to contact our allies and let them know to avoid that quadrant"

"Do we know what Honerva was trying to do?"

"She wanted to go back in time"

"Ugh. Why can't bad guys ever be original?... ow! Matt!"

"Keith, we'll take the readings and return. Do you mind if I use Green to contact the rebel forces?"

"Why are you asking him? She's my lion"

"No, go ahead"

"Guys, Green is mine!"

"No ones saying she's not"

"Then stop..."

The call was ended, presumably by Matt. Shaking his head at his friend's, Keith couldn't quite believe that Honerva was dead. Just like that...

"Hunk, just make sure they don't kill each other"

"Will do"

Ending his call, there was nothing else for them to say

"So what now?"

"We wait for them, mum, can you contact Kolivan. Let them know to avoid any missions concerning infected ships and that quadrant of space. Once that is done, why don't you guys get some rest? It'll be vargas before Pidge, Matt and Hunk return"

 Still agitated from Lance being hurt, Keith headed down to the training deck to work his anger into something more constructive than cursing Lotor and Shiro.

  *

After waking from an amazing sleep, the only thing wrong was the cramping in his stomach. Pushing himself up, Lance slid the IV from his arm as he winced 

"Lance, lovely to see you awake my boy. How are you feeling?"

Rubbing his face, Lance yawned as he nodded at Coran 

"Oddly refreshed, I can't believe I fell asleep"

"You certainly needed it"

"How long was I out for? And are the others back?"

"Yes. Honerva's base was completely destroyed. We've decided to cordon off that quadrant of space for now, as by Pidge's calculations, it's turning into a black hole"

"I thought they happened instantaneously"

"Yes, well, this one hasn't. Now that you're awake, are you up for a scan"

"I already had one"

"There's no harm in being thorough. Young Keith only just left before you woke. He's been worried for you"

Talk about guilt tripping...

"Coran, if I tell you something, can you swear you won't tell anyone"

"Lance, what is it? What's wrong?"

Placing one hand on his stomach, Lance sank back down

"I've been feeling sick lately, and my stomach is cramping... um... Krolia said I... she said I was... that I was miscarrying. I haven't taken off my ring, so I don't see how I could be, but I need to know"

"Does Keith know?"

"No. So please don't tell him. I don't want to upset him when it might just be nothing"

"Alright, just lay back and get comfortable. You know the drill"

"I wish I didn't"

"We all wish you didn't. Don't worry, I'll get to the bottom of this"

Closing his eyes, Lance took a deep breath as he waited for the heat to fill his stomach.

 "Coran. You're not saying anything"

"Lance, I don't see a foetus, but there does seem to be evidence that your womb lining is "shedding". I can't not say that you were, but it is thicker than your previous scans"

"So I might have been?"

"Or it may just be your hormones returning to normal levels"

"Ok... thanks Coran. I'll um... I'll talk to the doctor when we get back to Olkarion"

Though Coran probably knew more than the doctors did

"Lance, perhaps you should tell Keith?"

"No. It's ok. If it's something serious, then I'll tell him"

Climbing off the bed, Lance was in shock. The ring on his finger was supposed to prevent this kind of thing. Internally his omega was having a breakdown over it all. He needed to see his kids.

 Heading down to the nursery, he found it empty, as was his and Keith's quarters. Walking all the way back up to find Keith and the pups was too much effort, so he remade their bed and gave Keith a call. In the background he could hear Hunk and Pidge laughing. Jealousy flared inside of him. Why did they get to be happy? When there was possibly something wrong with him... he still didn't want to believe it could be a miscarriage. Promising to be down soon, Lance changed into a pair of Keith's black track pants and one of his mates singlets. He really wanted Keith. He wanted his mate curled around him, kissing him, telling him everything was going to be ok. It was hard to choke down his tears, and it took forever before Keith came in with the boys. Laying them on the bed, Keith went to climb on the outer side, effectively blocking them in. Reaching out, Lance tugged his hand as he stared up at his mate

"Hey, what's up? Did your scan not go alright?"

"It... I just, I really want you to hold me"

Keith was confused, but still did as asked, climbing around him and the boys before spooning up behind him and kissing his nape

"Baby, you can tell me anything"

"I know. Just... I really love you Keith"

"I love you too"

"And the boys. I love them so much"

Lance placed his hand over Keith's, squeezing firmly as he did

"You're scaring me"

"Sorry. I just really wanted to see you and the boys"

"You don't need to be so upset over that. We missed you too"

"We're on our way back to Olkarion, aren't we?"

"It's still going to take a couple of quintants"

Quintants... which meant this might all pass before they reached Olkarion. He could only hope so. Leaning in to kiss Laneith, his son stuck his fingers up his nose

"That's gross"

"Do you have a problem with my snot?"

"No, but maybe it's better that it's not on Laneith's fingers"

"I haven't got anything to wipe it on"

"I'll get a tissue"

"It's fine. We'll live. Won't be baby. Yes we will, look at you, you think it's all a big game"

Laneith cooed happily, his other hand grabbing for Lance's face, capturing his hand, Lance kissed his palm as he made nomming noises

"You're an amazing mother"

"It helps these guys are so adorable, just like their daddy"

"I am not adorable"

"Sexy. Perfect. Adorable"

"I'm definitely none of those"

"You are to me"

"That's because you're weird"

"That's not nice"

"Just calling it like I see it"

  *

For the most part, his cramping had passed during the trip back to Olkarion. With nothing to do, Lance spent most of his time down in the nursery with the boys. They loved wriggling on their play mat, and being just the three of them, Lance opted to let them play naked. It wasn't healthy to keep them in nappies all the time, and Kelance has a small rash forming from it. Even if he was in pain, he definitely enjoyed spending time with them, and reading to them, and watching them inch their way closer to crawling. So far there had only been two accidents, both of which were pee, so it wasn't too hard to clean up. 

 The evening they arrived on Olkarion, Lance was the first one off the castle, taking his pups with him while Keith dealt with finding a way home for Lotor and Matt. Making his way down towards the village, he ran into the person he was seeking out as he went

"Ryner!"

As always, Ryner didn't know to deal with perky persona, the old woman smiling thinly as she nodded

"Lance. What news from the castle?"

"Everyone's ok... hey, do you happen to have a few doboshes? I was actually coming to find you"

"What can this old lady do for you?"

Fidgeting with Laneith's blanket, Lance hated asking

"I think there might be something wrong with the ring you made for me. Is it possible you can take a look?"

"Did something happen?"

"Uh... possibly. I was... I need to see a doctor too"

"Why don't we take a walk down to the hospital?"

"Thanks. I'm sorry for all of this, especially when just got back"

 Walking tensely beside Ryner, neither of them talked as they made their way down to the hospital and inside. A few of the Olkarion came to ask how the pups were, so when Ryner took him by the elbow and led him away, he was more than a little grateful. He didn't know what to say. The pups were fine. Lead into a small examination room, the doctor was already waiting 

"I'll take that ring of yours now"

"Oh, hang on. I need to put the boys down"

Trying to appear normal, the omega laid both pups on the bed, before sliding the ring from his finger and dropping it into Ryner's palm

"I will return it to you later, if that's acceptable"

"That would be awesome. Thank you"

"No worries"

Nodding to both of them, the woman shuffled from the room, leaving him with the same doctor he had after birthing the boys

"Red Paladin, what seems to be the problem?"

"I... Ryner created a ring so I wouldn't fall pregnant, but recently I took a blow to the stomach and I've been bleeding since"

"So you think you're miscarrying?"

"I've been bleeding and cramping for the last 3 quintants. It's lightening up, but we weren't sure if I did miscarry of if it's hormone related"

"I'll need to examine you. Please lower your pants and place your hands on the bed"

Because that wasn't embarrassing... gritting his teeth, he did as he was asked.

 After being poked and prodded in ways he definitely didn't like, Lance focused all his attention on his boys

"There's no sign of internal or external trauma. You may pull your pants back up, and please lay on the bed"

Holding two pups and trying to climb onto the bed was nearly impossible and the old man didn't move a finger to help him as he did. Both boys were just as cranky as he was by the end of it 

"I'm going to perform an ultrasound. It will also measure your hormone levels, and test for any traces of lingering foreign matter"

"Um. Ok"

The look he got clearly said he didn't need to speak. Couldn't the man at least be a little nice? He was completely freaking out! And the gel pad he placed on his stomach... Oh Lordy... his whole body clenched.

 "You're not pregnant. If you were, you have already passed the foetus. There is still some lining of the womb shedding, which suggests a pregnancy has occurred"

"So I lost a baby"

The old man sighed as he nodded

"For now take comfort in the knowledge you have two boys already"

Packing everything away, just as efficiently as he'd unpacked the portable scanner, Lance was too shocked to move. The ring was supposed to protect against falling pregnant... this wasn't supposed to happen. Sliding off the bed, he mumbled his thanks, before fleeing. His omega just as shocked as the rest of him, and he didn't know what to say or do.

 Blindly fleeing up to the castle, luck wasn't on his side as he walked into Lotor and Shiro. Bouncing back, Shiro grabbed his arm so he wouldn't fall

"Lance! What are you doing out here?"

"I just went for a walk..."

"On a cold night like this? The pups aren't dressed for such cool weather. You better get them inside"

"That's what I was trying to do"

Ignoring the angry look on Lotor's face, Lance pulled away from Shiro 

"Lance?"

"It was just a walk. Lay off of me"

"I didn't..."

"You didn't what? Mean to imply in a bad mother?! Just leave me alone"

Shiro and Lotor could both...

"Lance, what's wrong?"

"Nothings wrong! If you've got time to stand here and yell at me, then you've got time to go away!"

"I wasn't yelling at you"

"What's going on here?"

Appearing from the castle entry, Allura walked to his side

"Lance?"

"Can't you all just leave me alone! I went for a walk! That's not illegal, I wasn't doing anything wrong"

Allura took half a step back, concern written all over her face 

"Lance, no one said you did anything wrong"

"Shiro did. And I can tell Lotor's mad because I didn't save Honerva"

This was their first time seeing each other since the incident, that was another reason he'd stayed down in the nursery with the boys 

"Lance"

"Stop saying my name! God. Can't you all give me some space?"

Pushing past Allura, Lance strode into the castle, making his way straight back down to the nursery. The night wasn't that cold, and both boys were in full length onesies with beanies on. He knew how to take care of his kids. He didn't need anyone sticking their nose in his business.

  *

After talking with Allura, Keith sought out Lance. His mate was hidden under a pile of blankets, with the twins laying on his chest. Pulling the pile back, the glare his husband shot him had him sighing 

"If you're going to hell me off, I don't want to hear it"

"Allura said you were upset. You've been upset for days... are you ready to tell me what's wrong?"

"No"

"Baby, please talk to me. Not only did Allura say you were upset, Shiro said the same thing, and apparently villagers saw you at the hospital"

"I don't want to talk about it!"

Keith flinched as anger rolled off Lance 

"Baby, I'm worried. Mums worried to"

"That's funny"

"What's so funny about that?"

"That mum would be worried. If she hadn't told me, I wouldn't have even known"

Breaking down into sobs, Lance tried to curl around their son's 

"If she hadn't told you what?"

"I... I had a miscarriage. I think I had a miscarriage, it... there wasn't any evidence of carrying... but... I was down at the hospital hoping they'd tell me I didn't. Mum smelt it on me. And. Just. I'm a broken omega, so just leave"

Keith was flawed. The thought had crossed his mind for a moment when Lance started bleeding, but the ring was supposed to prevent him falling pregnant. If Lance had conceived, he wouldn't have been very far along

"Baby"

"Don't! Don't be nice to me! Not now"

"Hey, come here"

Climbing into their bed, Keith pulled Lance up against him, with the pups still on lance's chest as he cried

"I didn't even want another kid so soon, so I don't know why it hurts!"

"Because you love so much baby..."

"I wasn't supposed to fall pregnant!"

"I know. But we were using technology not built for our exact make up. There are no one hundred percent contraceptives"

"How come you don't hate me?!"

"Because these things happen. Your body was probably drained for your extended heat, and it didn't know what to do"

"Why me! What did I do with wrong?"

"You didn't do anything wrong baby. Nothing at all. I'm here, I'm here without"

Pressing kisses to Lance's temple, he rubbed his mates arm at the same time. Losing another pup was rough, but he wasn't the one who to physically deal with the effects of doing so

"I'm here. I've got you. I love you"

"You shouldn't... I'm wrong"

"You're not wrong"

Let holding his crying mate, Keith struggled to hold down his emotions, eventually giving into his own tears.

 With Lotor and Matt both leaving the following morning, Keith let Lance sleep in. His first stop of the morning after seeing two of them off, was a trip down to see Ryner and the organising a house to borrow. He make good on his promise that they'd live off the castle, and with a little string pulling, the Olkari woman had an even better plan. They were going to construct a house for them, from the group up using vines. Keith didn't care, he'd only stipulated that it needed to have a bath, but the rest of it was left to her discretion. Returning to the castle, he found Lance was up and about, eating breakfast in the kitchen while Hunk was baking. Blinking at him, Lance blushed as Keith walked over to his mate and kissed him deeply

"Guys, it's too early for this"

"It's never too early to kiss Lance. I'm sorry I wasn't there when you woke up"

"It's ok. Hunk explained you were seeing off Matt and Lotor"

"Yeah. We had to piece together a ship for Lotor, so we didn't have to part with the fighter jet. Matt had his own ship, so he left first"

Nodding, Lance went back to what seemed to be space cereal

"So what's the plan now? I mean. We have no big bad at the moment... who do we fight now?"

"There's still some factions that are more than likely to cause trouble, but for the most part, we'll be continuing to offer aid and support to the planets in the coalition"

"It feels weird not having anyone to fight"

"I thought you'd be happy Hunk"

"I am. It's just... it's been one adventure after another since we came out here, and now there seems to be some stability in the Galaxy. What do we do?"

"Isn't that what I just asked"

"For now, I think we have all earned a well deserved break. We'll monitor Lotor's movements until we're sure he isn't planning to move against us"

"He's still mad I couldn't save Honerva"

"What makes you say that?"

"Because he didn't say anything. He didn't yell at me or ask me what happened in her final moments. He just accepted it"

"He is half Galra"

"Keith's half Galra and if something happened to his mum? He'd want to know"

"Keith likes his mum. I don't think Lotor liked Honerva"

"He liked Honerva. His problem was mostly with Haggar. You weren't there. I think he actually supported her trying to turn back time"

"Something like that, it can't be possible"

"It's happened before. Remember, Allura and Coran were trapped in that time rift before. I'm worried Lotor will want to pick up where Honerva ended"

"He doesn't have the quintessence or knowledge to do so"

"But he talked to her...

[joyofcrime-elinorhigh]

All My REVIEWS REVIEW: (2016 and 2017)

Review-ception!

 Hello everybody, my name is JoyofCrimeArt and welcome to my first review of 2018! I guess you could call this season three? Which if we're going with that analogy that means that this and 2019 will be my best years of reviewing. And then it'll be all downhill from there, as I slowly fall into a rut of perceptual seasonal rot. So enjoy it while it last, damn it!  It's insane to think that I've been doing this for almost two years. And as this dawned on me, I started to feel a bit...introspective. We've all look back at our past, sometimes with regret, other times with nostalgia. And we've all made mistakes that we are not proud of-  EXCEPT FOR ME CAUSE I'M A FU*KING BEAST!  -And I got to thinking about my past works, my old reviews, and began to wonder if they actually still hold up. It had been forever since I had actually reread some of those older ones. And that's what we're going to be doing here today. Because what kind of critic would I be if I couldn't take criticism myself? And since they say that "you are your toughest critic" I figured it be good to see if I could take what I've spent the last two years dishing out.  Here's how this is going to work. I will be looking at all twenty two of my past reviews, and give my BRIEF thoughts on each of them, as well as possibly give some context on where my mindset was when I was writing them. Think of this like a directors commentary of sorts! However, any multi-part reviews will be counted as one for the sake of convince and time. So really it's closer to eighteen reviews. Also, obviously, this review will be sort of a companion piece to those reviews, so might wanna read those reviews first. But with that all said, let's jump right in and start at the beginning, with my first ever Deviant Art review... Powerpuff Girls 2016 REVIEW Part 1: (04-14-16) Powerpuff Girls 2016 REVIEW Part 2: (05-02-16) Powerpuff Girls 2016 REVIEW Part 3: (05-19-16)  So I wanna explain where my mindset was with this review, and what inspired me to start reviewing in the first place. If you remember back in early 2016 EVERYBODY in the cartoon reviewing community was going on and on about this show. Everybody was hating on it and bashing it, even before the show had premiered. Saying that it was going to suck. I was cautiously excited for the reboot, excited at the idea of the Powerpuff Girl's becoming a spanning franchise in the same way as Batman or Ninja Turtles where. If this show turned out well, Powerpuff could become a cartoon that's remade every decade or so, and people could watch and experience it for decades to come.  And when you're in the minority opinion, and you see everybody just bashing the thing that you are super excited about, it can be a bit discouraging. When the show actually premiered I thought it was...okay. And the problems I did have with it weren't the problems that everybody else had. But as more and more videos came out from popular cartoon reviewers, I decided that I wanted to write a review in order to release all my pent up thoughts and frustrations.  So yeah, my reviews weren't made because of a love and passion for reviewing and animation, but out of BITTERNESS AND HATE!  Re-reading the reviews, They weren't AS bad as I thought it would be, though there is very much a "pilot" type of vibe to it. There's no videos or images like my future reviews would have and it's kinda light on actual jokes.  There's a part in this review where I said that Craig McCracken gave his blessing for the show, we now know that isn't the case. But at the time that's what Tom Kenny said. And I don't want to change it because I believe that it's important not to try to undo past flaws and mistakes. I also feel like I was too nice in the review looking back on it now.  I don't know if it's just my opinion changing or just me wanting to extenuate the shows positives because oh how much everyone else was extenuating it's negatives but if I wrote this today I wouldn't be so kind. I said the show was meh but now I think it is a bad show. I just don't think it's the "end of CN" like so many people were saying at the time. But regardless I feel like I still stand by a lot of my points I made in the review. I still don't care about the memes, or the change in crew and voice cast. I'm upset by writing and lack of action and comedy that made the old show great. And I still hope that CN will give Powerpuff another try sometime down the line, and give it the reboot it deserves.  But I had a lot of fun making this review, and it would inspire me to make many more in the future. So I guess Powerpuff 2016 changed my life for the better.... Steven Universe Hit the Diamond REVIEW: (06-16-16)  Honestly...I think this one really holds up.  You can easily tell that this review set the trend for what my reviews ended up becoming overall. Images and videos where added, there's a really good balance of both comedy and analysis. My intro was introduced (yeah, I didn't realize this till now but the Powerpuff Girls reviews didn't have my typical intro.) And it started the Lapis "This plan sucks" meme.  A bit of background, originally this wasn't going to be my fourth review. I was going to review the CN short program "Mixels" because somebody had asked if I had. But after watching through it I just...had nothing to say on it. Then I saw this episode and impediment got re-inspired. I remember writing the whole review in just two or three days, it was all very impromptu. Overall I'm proud of this one, and I think it would be a good "first review to read" kind of thing to introduce someone to my reviewing style.  I'm not sorry for that RWBY Chibi joke by the way. It was my finest moment. Don't Hug Me I'm Scared REVIEW: (08-22-16) "So that's my review of Don't Hug Me, I'm Scared (Hopefully it didn't come off as too rambly and fanboy-y)" Well too bad past me, because it totally did.  Okay, to be fair, this review isn't THAT bad. Not as bad as I remembered it being, but still not one of my best in my opinion. Part of it has to do with the topic. DHMIS is a hard series to summarize and explain, and that's kinda the point of it. But I still feel like I could of done a better job describing it. The problem is a lack of structure, and the whole thing comes off as kinda rambling and confusing. Especially if you were a newcomer who had never heard of the series prior to my review.    I feel like I did a better job talking about the production side of the series than I did talking about the plot and characters. During this time I feel like I really struggled with purely positive reviews. I feel like a lot of them just came off as, like I said, rambly and fanboy-y. That's why I did so many "so bad it's good" movies and episodes in my first year of reviewing. I feel like if I had given it another draft it could of been a lot better, but what are you going to do. Camp Camp REVIEW: (09-24-16)  I remember this review being a bad one, but after rereading it, It's nowhere near as bad as I remembered. It's far from one of my best review and a lot of the problems I had in regards to doing positive reviews are still present thought. (Over-explaining things, a bit fan boyish at parts.) Overall though, it's not a BAD review, just a very "average" one.  The only noticeable things about this review in particular is that 1.) It's my first review where I had links at the bottom to other reviews and 2.) it's the only review to my knowledge that actually convinced somebody to watch the show they probably wouldn't have watched otherwise. And that really means a lot to me, cause that's a huge part of why I even do this. To introduce people to things that they will hopefully really enjoy. So in that regard I can't look upon this review THAT harshly. Scary Godmother: Halloween Spooktacular REVIEW: (10-24-16)  "Anyway, then we Jimmy appear on top on a tombstone dressed in his devil pajamas,"  Yes past me, "Then we Jimmy appear" indeed.  SERIOUSLY WHY DO ANY OF YOU WATCH ME-  When it comes to my reviews there are two main types. There's the one's that are deep analysis, often based on series that I feel very passionate about. These reviews are made with the purpose of introducing people to these underrated series with the hope the reader will check out the series, and hopefully be as impacted by ir as I was.  And then there are the reviews where it's just like "Ha! This is stupid. Let's make fun of this direct to TV movie intended for five year olds, lol." This is one of those reviews.  A problem I do have with this review other than grammar is that there are several moments where I kinda explain the jokes that are in a movie. And I don't do a very good job at explaining them because I lake the context surrounding the jokes. If I made the review today I probably would wanna cut some of those lines out. The review is also noticeably longer than the others up to this point, so that's something.  I never did end up reviewing the sequel like I said I would...at least not YE- Ouran High School Host Club REVIEW: (12-09-16)  So for some background here, I started watching the series really early in the year and decided I wanted to review it. However, the series took me a long time to finish, like almost six months from what I can recall. Which is odd because the show only has 26 episodes. But this was a very busy time for me, with me getting my first part time job, my family moving, and having to work on my comics on a weekly schedule. By the time I had finished this show, while I did enjoy the show a lot, I had kinda burned out about the idea of doing a review of it. But I didn't want all the material I had already worked on to go to waste, so I decided to just kinda muscle through it, and I think you can kinda feel that in the review.  There are still plenty of jokes in it that I'm proud of, but there are also some flaws with it. I wish I was a bit quicker in terms of summing up the cast, as that takes up almost half of the review itself. I also feel like the review doesn't have the best "flow." to it, if that makes sense. It kinda feels like I'm just jumping from point to point.  But it was my first Deviant-cember review, and my first anime review. So two big milestones there! Frosty Returns REVIEW: (12-16-16)  The most interesting thing about this review is that it's the to take a MASSIVE jump in total page view. It's weird, like why this one? I guess Frosty Returns is what my audience was secretly clamoring for? I think, this might have been when I started posting my reviews on the Mr. Enter deviant art page, so maybe that could explain it. But I'm not positive.  Anyway, as this is another "make fun of something stupid" review and not a deep passion filled analysis. There's not much to really say about it. I really need to stop mentioning the good jokes in reviews like this, they don't translate very well when transcribed from special to script. Also it spoils all the best parts. I'M SORRY FOR SPOILING FROSTY RETURNS, I HOPE YOU ALL CAN FORGIVE ME! Also I remember getting very tired half way through this. It was my first time doing reviews back to back and I was really anticipating the "2016 Year in REVIEW." But I buckled through it regardless.  I still need to review T.I and Tiny's Holiday Hustle by the way. Add it to the list! The Legend of Frosty the Snowman REVIEW: (12-23-16)  By the time I had starting writing this review I was so tired of writing and so wanting to work on the yearly retrospect that it kinda felt like a chore to write. But like a chore, I'm glad I did it because I think it turned out pretty good. It's a good bit longer than my previous reviews, which was a pain at the time, but there are some good jokes in here. Nothing else really to add, except for the fact that I wanted to use this image in the review, but forgot until after I already published it. 

I could give you context on what this image is...but is there any context that would justify it? 2016 Year in REVIEW: Part 1 (12-30-16) 2016 Year in REVIEW: Part 2 (12-31-16) "Getting mad at the year, an abstract concept, just feels...unproductive to me. It seem's like it's the wrong target to be directing all this anger at. Sometimes bad stuff just happens, and there's a good chance that by the end of 2017 we'll hate that year too. Because most of the bad stuff that happened in 2016...probably won't just go away come January 1st."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I-VawFj4GRM

 I got the idea to do this review probably half-way-ish through the year, and it was by far the review that I was most excited to work on. And honestly I think the yearly retrospects are, in general, the funnest reviews to work on. And good thing too because if It were any other review, I would probably be to tired and unmotivated to actually work on them.  If I have one regret it would be the final ranking of the series. In hindsight I would swap RWBY Chibi and Camp Camp's rankings. Though this may just be a "hindsight is twenty twenty" thing, as I think Camp Camp improved with it's second season, while RWBY Chibi got a bit worse.    These reviews where a lot of fun but also an exhausting experience. I had written five reviews, back to back, during the holidays, which each review becoming longer and longer. I was tired and started to feel a bit done by the time I was working on part two. (As originally it wasn't going to be a two parter. It just kinda ended up that way.)  Also this was sorta the point where my reviews started getting longer. As righting five reviews in such a short amount of time naturally made me start writing more. Like how when one is put under intense physical training over a short period of time there bodies naturally adapt, and become stronger. It's like that, but with dumb cartoon articles. Top 10 Toonami Ad's of the [adult swim] Era: (03-20-17)  As you can see, there was a bit of a gap between reviews here, for obvious reason. After Deviant-cember year one I was DONE with reviews for a long while. I needed a break.  This might be one of the funniest reviews to do the research for. I sat down and watched ALL the eligible bumpers and ads in chronological order and it was great! I didn't even care that there where hundreds of ads to look over, I just had a blast!  It was also my first top ten list! Top tens and top fives were always something I liked seeing other people do, but not something I often felt very comfortable doing. Not that I'm against them or anything, it's just that I have a hard time making them. I'm the type of guy who's exact opinions on things changes very often, and so it's hard for me to say "this thing is worse than this but better than this." I don't think that I could ever do a "Favorite Show of All Time" list or anything like that. I like so many different things for different reasons...I just don't think my brain is wired to work that way. So that's why whenever I DO make a ranking list, I try not to take the actual ranking that seriously, and just use it as an excuse to show off some stuff I like.  However, despite this, there are some things about the review that I would change looking back on it. You can still see my struggles with doing a fully positive review. Like I said earlier, It took me a long while to learn how to do positive reviews without sounding rambly and fanboy-y. Also there's almost no jokes in this one. I don't think the lack of jokes in a review is NECESSARILY a bad thing, but I feel it kinda is in this case. Since I was covering such a niche topic, some humor might have made the review better, and give people who we're uninteresting in bumpers and Toonami something to latch on to. Oh well...   Dragon Ball Super: Battle of Gods Arc REVIEW: (05-01-17)  The first part of my Dragon Ball Super retrospective series, (Which, with the recent announcement of Super ending will now have a conclusion. I sort of assumed I'd be reviewing Super until I either died or stopped doing reviews, whichever came first.) This review had a lot less recapping than I remember it having and has a good amount of both comedy and analysis. (Probably because I had the whole "compare and contrast" element to it.) Overall a fairly good start to a retrospect. Other than that not much to say though.  I'm also really proud of that "Godtube" joke. Like I know I used MS Paint, but I still think it's a really good edit. #humblebrag Samurai Jack Season Five REVIEW: (06-19-17)  "In general I tend to be more critical and nit picky about things I like than things I hate." Does anybody else feel this way, or is it just a "me" thing? I'm genuinely curious.  If there's something that this review made me realize is how quickly things come and go in the cartoon community. I was on a hiatus at the time the season ended so this review came out about a month later. And by that time it seemed like everybody had moved on from Samurai Jack for the most part. And I don't mean this as a way to complain about a lack of views or comments or anything. On the contrary the amount of views this review got seems to be on par with what they normally are and I think I actually got a bit more comments than I usually do. What I more mean is that while the season was running it was all anybody was talking about, and then once it ended nobody was discussing it. The "buzz" was gone so to speak, and it feels like that's what happens whenever a show isn't currently running or goes on break. The fandom burns bright but dies out fast, and that's kinda a shame. I feel like a lot of great shows don't get talked about as much as they should because there not quote unquote "relevant" and thus end up getting swept under the rug.  As for the review part, this is one of my personal favorites. I really wanted to make sure I did the season justice, which is part of the reason it came out almost a month after the season ended. I wanted to let my feelings settle for a bit a see how I felt after I had time to think about it, rather than just having a gut reaction. (Though I'm not saying there isn't a place for stuff like that.)  Also my first review with a title card! Title cards where something I always wanted to do but I was always afraid it would just be to time consuming, but now I think it's worth it, as I think it does add a bit of flair to the presentation. Also I've gotten a lot faster at making them. (The title card for this review was done in one evening for instance.) Watamote REVIEW: (Oh, the Cringe!) (08-14-17)  This review was easily one of the hardest to make. I started watching the series in preparation for the review in FEBRUARY, and didn't finish it until SUMMER! (I don't have time to watch cartoons! I have cartoon reviews to work on!) At the time I was watching each episode twice, once alone and once with my brother, and I think that's what made me burn out on the series. That time period was also the time where I started my new job as well, so maybe that was also a factor. I guess it makes sense, but considering the show is one of my favorite cartoons of the decade and only TWELVE episodes long, I dunno, I figured I wouldn't have that kind of reaction to it. This review was suppose to be my fourteenth review. Then it was going to be my fifteenth review, until finally it ended up becoming my sixteenth. That's how long it took for me to finish the show episodes!  So eventually I just bit the bullet and finished the dang show. Then came the problems of actually writing the show. Like I said before, I have a problem doing positive reviews without ending up ramble-y and fanboy-y, and so I REALLY wanted to make sure that it didn't happen this time. So I wrote THREE drafts of this review (prior to this I only did one draft.) I would go reread it and change things, reread it and change things...  And I'm really proud of how it turned out. The beginning part has a few awkward lines, but overall I really am proud of how it turned out. This is really my first positive review that I really loved, and it has given me the confidence to do more reviews like that in the future. You don't need to just make fun of things and review the most bottom of the barrel stuff. You can make a review where you just talk about a series or show or movie that has a special place in you're heart without it being boring. I tend to prefer reviews where their is a balance of jokes and analysis, but you don't always need that. If you're talking about something you're passionate about, that passion will seep through to the viewer. Or at least that's how I feel. Dragon Ball Super: Resurrection 'F' Arc REVIEW: (9-18-17)  I typically try to get the Dragon Ball Super reviews to come out roughly as the arcs finish on Toonami, but here I was a bit late, and by the time the review was finished the televised broadcast was already well into the Champa arc. As such, I kinda had to rush this review out in order to not fall even farther behind. And so my heart wasn't really into this review as much as it was with some of my other reviews. I still like how it turned out overall (I wouldn't publish a review if I wasn't proud of it at least a little.) but overall this feels like a review that's just kinda...there.    I feel like to much of the review was just recapping the events of the arc, and it could of used more jokes or analysis to make it feel a bit less dry. This is also my first review with a title card drawn in FireAlpaca! That's right, I moved on from MS Paint! (At least with title cards.)   Rick and Morty REVIEW: (With MiketheHuman113) (12-01-17)  My first colab review! I had wanted to do a collab for a while, and at the time Mike was the person on the site that I knew the most about, and when I saw him post a list of all time favorite characters, and saw Rick as number two, I thought that he would be a good pic.  Actually doing the review however was a bit of a challenge. I had to write my segments, send it to him via note, and then get his segments back and paste them into my journal in a way so that it sounded natural. Then I had to rewrite some of the transitions to make it all flow together.  Why didn't you just use Google Docs? 

 ...

NNNHHHHGGGGUUUUUU!!!!!  Anyway, this was a topic that I wanted to get off my chest for the longest time, so I was very happy to finally do so. I do have some problems with the review though (None of which where on Mike's end BTW, just to be clear he was awesome.) I feel like there's a lot of jumping around with the points, and the review's overall flow suffers as a result. I also wished I hadn't jumped around so much from spoiler to non spoilers as much as I did, and if I were to redo the review now I think I would want to make them review more general and less focused on specific moments and episodes. That way it be easier to follow if you hadn't seen the show.  I also wish that maybe it was a little shorter. It was my first time doing a collab, and I figured it be easier because I would only have to do half the work. But what ended up happening (and I blame my own workaholic-ness for this.) Is that I made a full length review, and then stuck Mike's contributions on top of it. So not only was the review long, but it wasn't any easier than a normal review. in fact it was probably harder.  But I'm glad I did it. I was fun and I'd love to do more collabs in the future. However given the previously mentioned difficulty it'll probably only be a "once a year-ish" thing. But y'never know. Who do you think I should collab with?  This was also the first time I made art for a review outside of the title card. In this case the Super Smash Bros style intro I did for Mike. I want to make those for everybody I do a collab with. Also I noticed that after this review, I began to be more noticed in the DA review community. Probably because Mike's in it, so I could leach off his audience. However, oddly enough, the views for this review are bellow average, so who knows. Dragon Ball Super: Champa Arc REVIEW: (12-08-17)  HEY KIDS AT HOME, COUNT THE AMOUNT OF TIME I SAY THE WORD "MISSTEP" "OPPORTUNITY" AND OR "WASTE." I'LL GIVE YOU A HINT, IT'S WAY TO FRICKIN' MUCH!-  There's also more spelling errors than normal. Overall I just blame the rush of Deviant-cember, and the fact that like in 2016, my heart was really set on the yearly recap instead of this.  The review as a whole however, ironically, is kinda like the arc itself. It starts out kinda slow, with mostly recapping events. But as the review goes on it's get's a lot better, with more jokes and insightful analysis. Not much else to say about this one. Top 5 Obscure Christmas Specials You Should Watch: (12-15-17)  I feel like there were some unprofessional moments in this review, mostly as a result o a time crunch to finish the review before the deadline. From not rewatching Nestor to tracing the Hawkmoth logo it feels a bit sloppy to me. (Even though I'm sure these are things that won't bother most other people.) I was in a bit of a rush for this part of deviant-cember as work and the holidays in general gave me less time to work on the reviews, in addition to the stuff that I was posting on Mondays. I wanted to succeed in my goal of doing two uploads a week during Deviant-cember since I failed to do so in 2016. However, I am glad that I was able to talk about so many weird specials, and I don't think that review suffers to much from the rush. When I was writing the review, I felt burnt out from reviews and just wanted to move on to the yearly recap, but looking back on it now, the review isn't really that bad. There are some good jokes in it and I love recommending obscure stuff to people. Maybe one day I'll do a part two.  OH! And it turns out that "A Cranberry Christmas" IS lost media! It's the first piece of lost media that I watched before it got lost! WE NEED TO FIND THIS, GUYS! 2017 Year in REVIEW: Part 1 (12-22-17) 2017 Year in REVIEW: Part 2 (12-29-17)  Most of the things that I said about my 2016 year in review could be said about these reviews, so I don't have much to add. Have I mentioned that I hate the "This year sucks" meme yet? It such a stupid thing, to hate on a year. And I worry that with our cynical society we live in that the "This year is awful" thing will go on until the end of time itself. 2017 was fine. 2016 was fine. Y'wanna know what year was really a dumpster fire. 1942. That's the year we entered the second World War, segregation was still a thing, and all the meme's sucked that year! It was awful!  My only real regret about this review was using the word "hate boner" when talking about Castlevania's views on religion. I think the term "hate boner" is really dumb sounding and at the time of writing the review I didn't realize that people used the term so unironically. (No offense to people who do use the term. It' just a term I really don't like, personally. Just use the term "bias.")  And that's it. ALL 22 of my reviews reviewed! Do I recommend...me?  Well personally this JoyofCrimeArt guy does have his fair share of problems. He can come off as a bit fanboy-y and ramble-y at times. His reviews sometimes have weird pacing issues, jumping from point to point. While I enjoy how in-depth he can SOMETIMES be, they can be a bit long at points. Also he has a lot of unpopular opinions, and sometimes I wonder if he's just being contrarian. Not the mention the fact that, since the idiot thought that having THREE web comics running simultaneity at the same time was a good idea, he doesn't actually post reviews very often when compared to some of his reviewing counterparts.  On the other hand though...there are some positives to the guy. He seems very passionate about the topics he talks about. He has an okay balance of analysis and comedy. And I also like how he talks about a variety of different stuff. From popular series, obscure series, anime, web series, direct to DVD movies, bumpers, HIS OWN REVIEWS. You never know what you're going to get.  Is he the best reviewer on DA. Probably not. Heck, he's probably not even in the top fifteenth. But if you're willing to devote a half hour of you're time to reading one of his overly long reviews, who knows, you might just enjoy yourself. Or not. I dunno.  So that was my review of my reviews. What are your thoughts about my thoughts about my thoughts. Leave those thoughts in the comments down below. I would love to exchange thoughts even if we don't have the same thoughts. Do you have a favorite or least favorite review of mine? I'd be genuinely curious to know. Please fav, follow, and comment if you like the review and have a great day. (I do not own any of the images or videos in this review all credit goes to there original owners.)

https://www.deviantart.com/joyofcrimeart/journal/All-My-REVIEWS-REVIEW-2016-and-2017-739596421 DA Link