#this has a lot of dean anxiety so beware theres a lot going on in deans head asfhahdhas

[chocolatecakecas]

Rockin' the Suburbs: Chapter 3

Chp1   Chp2   Chp4 or read on ao3

They were finally done after midnight.

As soon as Sam showed up they spent an hour tearing through the house looking for hex bags, sigils, EMF, sulfur, on top of Cas' mojo, which didn't sense anything. So they've got nothing. At least they can rule out witch, ghost, or demon, for now anyway.

Then they, unfortunately, spent the rest of the afternoon unpacking, trying to put on a show for the neighbors, and whatever thing was out there. Dean had sent Sam back to the motel after they finished the pizza they ordered, and he left with a smile and promise to call in the morning.

And Jack was already tucked into his new space bed, that he's absolutely over the moon about, hours ago. He thankfully conked out quickly, exhausted from all of the excitement of the day.

Now Dean was alone, leaning on the kitchen island. Cas had disappeared upstairs a while ago, so he only can assume he went to bed.

But it's not like Dean's gonna go upstairs to check that theory, even though every inch of his body was screaming at him to go to sleep. Because upstairs was their bedroom. With their bed, and the comforter Cas picked out.

For them.

(Read the rest under the cut)

And in a flash he pushes off the island, deciding to clean the kitchen instead. First night in a new house, can't start leaving a mess already, right?

But the only problem was, there wasn't really anything to actually clean. They ate pizza off of paper plates, (even though Dean bought brand new circle plates that afternoon), and drank soda and beer from cans and bottles.

So he settles for wiping off the dining room table, three times, until realizing he couldn't justify wiping it off a fourth. And Dean does what any logical, extremely exhausted, person in this situation would do.

He restlessly paces around the foyer instead.

Not because he's avoiding the bedroom, of course, he's just got a lot to think about, and besides he thinks better when he's moving. It also serves as an excellent explanation for his ever-increasing heart rate.

But it's fine because it's just a stupid room.

Dean pauses, staring at the stairs for a moment, ignoring the pounding in his chest.

It's not like he and Cas haven't shared a room with a bed before, they do it all the time on solo hunts. But this is different.

Cas wasn't sleeping before. And now Cas eats a little, sleeps a little, takes showers, wears normal clothes. And Dean doesn't know if he just does it to do it, to fit in, or if his grace is fading, or what. It's not like they've talked about it, things are awkward enough between them, but it's not exactly an unwelcomed change. A change that makes everything about a billion times more confusing for Dean sure, but it's jus-nope too tired to go down that road.

So with a shaky breathe he lets his eyes wander up the white carpeted steps.

He can do this. It's just a room, with a bed, that Cas is currently laying in. And he'll have to lay next to h-

Dean snaps his head towards the living room, ripping his eyes away from the staircase and stopping on the wall clock.

Quarter to two.

"Fuck" Dean whispers to himself in the empty room.

The exhaustion washes over Dean, instantly weighing down his limbs. His eyes subconsciously trail down to the couch.

It looks comfortable enough he could just sleep there, and it would be fi-no it would be pathetic. And he'd probably wake up in pain, he's not exactly twenty-five anymore, plus he-

This is pathetic. Dean's ready to pass out on the floor, and he's definitely gonna need his four hours if he's gonna make it through the trials of meeting the neighbors and pretending to be marri-

And it's just a stupid room.

Then suddenly, he's climbing the stairs, and finds himself standing in the bedroom doorway before he even realizes it.

Dean's eyes immediately land on Cas, who stares right back, head tilted in question.

And Dean continues to silently hover in the doorway. Like an idiot.

His mouth goes dry when he really registers the sight before him, the swirling feeling is back, creeping around in his stomach. Because Cas is sitting up against the headboard, on top of that blue comforter, reading a book and looking so-

"Dean?"

Cas' voice snaps him from his thoughts and successfully gets his heart rate going again. Wonderful.

"I'm uh...I was gonna sleep on the couch" Dean manages to choke out.

Cas' face falls, and Dean immediately feels like shit.

"It's not becau-"

"I can take the cou-"

They both start at the same time, effectively cutting each other off.

Dean sighs, clenching his hands at his sides to stop his shaking hands.

He knew he'd have to sleep in the bed with Cas, they bought the comforter and everything, so of course, he knew. But actually doing it, is a different story and he ju-

"Dean, I don't mind. I waited because I wasn't sure what you wanted t-I can take the couch. I don't want to make you uncomfortable" Cas continues before Dean's brain even has a chance to reboot.

Cas quickly pushes off the bed, grabbing his book as he goes.

"No wait" Dean half-shouts, mouth moving without permission.

Cas stalls, clearly surprised, and hell Dean can concur with that.

What is wrong wi-

"Dean, I promise I don't mind, I barely sleep. You shouldn't have to sleep on the couc-"

"Cas, no that's not fair to you, we can-"Dean starts, cutting himself off.

They can what? Is Dean actually going to say they can-

 He's too tired for this shit. It's just a stupid bed in a stupid room, with Cas. He can stow his crap.

Dean unclenches his fists, taking an unsteady breath.

"Cas it's cool, we can both-it's a big bed, it'd be a waste" Dean finishes weakly.

Cas hesitates for a moment, looking unsure as he fiddles with the string of his sweatpants. And Dean's heart twists at the sight.

God, he's such an ass.

So he's gonna fix it.

"Of course it's fine Cas. It's a big bed, I'm not uncomfortable I swear. Just lay your ass down-and actually get under the covers this time you, weirdo" Dean says, trying for a joke. And whether it was for his own sake or Cas', he'll never tell.

Cas worries his lip between his teeth for a moment with a frown, then a small smile replaces it. Which Dean finds himself easily returning.

And before he can freak out again, he snatches a pair of sweatpants, and a tshirt from the drawer designated for his clothes, which he tries very hard not to think about, and hurries into the bathroom to change.

  After a brief staring contest with himself in the mirror, where he tried to regain control of his lungs, Dean finds himself slowly pulling back the covers of the bed.

Cas is rolled onto his side, buried under the blankets, and Dean can only see the mop of his hair peeking out. So assumes he's asleep. Dean lies on his back, afraid to move while he tries to not think about the warmth radiating next to him under the covers.

He squeezes his eyes shut, trying to will away the panic crawling up his throat, as the day's events flash behind his eyes.

He's in a house in the suburbs, with a ring on his finger pretending to be married to Cas, while he lays in a bed less than a foot away from him.

The swirling feeling, that Dean is now refusing to identify due to self-embarrassment, is twisting in his stomach again.

What was he thinking? How is he going to do this? They haven't even done anything yet and he's alre-

"Goodnight Dean" Cas murmurs, breaking the silence. And Dean whips his head to the side is met with a soft smile, and wide blue eyes shining in the dark.

The panic quickly melts away, and he gives a weak smile back. And with that, Cas turns away again, leaving Dean to stare through the dark.

He releases a breath he didn't realize was holding, as he watches Cas' shoulders slowly rise and fall under the comforter.

And then, that feeling makes an appearance. The feeling that Dean's had for years and refuses to talk about, but he definitely thinks about a lot more lately. It bubbles deep in his stomach, trying to rise to the surface to consume him.

So he physically swallows, shoving everything back down where they belong.

Then Dean forces himself to roll over, willing away the feeling, and letting his exhaustion consume him instead.

  Warmth. That's the first thing Dean registers as he begins to wake up. Then, he notices the light streaming on his face, and quickly squeezes his eyes shut tighter.

Weird, he must have left the light on his room since the bunker doesn't have windows after all, but he can't be bothered with that, as he's far too comfortable at the moment.

Which is also weird, because usually, he wakes up freezing. The bunker is great, but the heating system is old as shit and h-

Dean feels a hot puff of air against his shoulder.

Case. House. Married. Bed. Cas.

Dean's eyes fly open as memories from yesterday come flooding back to him. Dean slowly tries to get up, only to realize he can't.

Because he's stuck.

In Cas' arms.

A million thoughts rush into his mind, and he ignores every one of them because now is definitely not the time. Fighting the urge to launch out of the bed, Dean freezes, trying to wrack his brain about how he can get out of this without waking Cas.

But that's a little hard to do when all he can think about is Cas' arms wrapped tightly around his waist.

Fuck

Dean experimentally begins his legs, only to realize they're tangled with Cas'. He slowly shifts his leg toward the end of the bed and suddenly his boxers pull agains-

Oh

Oh shit.

And with that new revelation, Dean quickly, but carefully, frees himself from Cas' grasp, and stands shivering from the loss of warmth. He stares down at the bed, watching the sunlight stream over Cas' sleeping form, hair an absolute wreck, arms stretched out in front of him.

Arms Dean was just in.

He glances down at himself, breath catching in his throat, and practically sprints into the bathroom.

  And an hour later Dean's in the kitchen, cooking pancakes on the little griddle they bought yesterday, as if nothing happened.

Because nothing did happen.

And yeah, maybe Dean spent a little longer under an ice-cold shower, since the freezing cold room clearly wasn't enough-but the extra time definitely went toward fixing his hair. And definitely not towards anything else.

Dean starts flipping the pancakes onto a plate, trying to shove the thoughts from his mind, to no avail of course. Which is dumb because it was nothing, right? It didn't matter and it definitely didn't have anything to do with Cas and his arms an-

"De!" Jack shouts as he comes barreling into the kitchen, and into the back of Dean's legs. Which rips Dean faster from his thoughts than anything else could, and if Dean knew God gave a shit, he would thank him for that.

"Morning Squish, remember inside voices. Your Dad is still sleeping" Dean shushes half-heartedly, and Jack of course raises his finger to his lips, shushing very seriously.

So Dean scoops him, placing him in the little booster seat at the kitchen table, sitting Bun on top of the table of course. He makes quick work of cutting up pancakes for Jack, and placing them, and his Pooh cup in front of him.

"Thank De" Jack whispers, which makes Dean grin uncontrollably as turns back to the griddle.

He listens to Jack babble to Bun, and starts plating the rest of the pancakes. 

"Da!" Jack shouts from behind him. All rules of inside voices and Dean's momentary calm, thrown out the window, since clearly Cas is awake now.

Dean doesn't turn around, staring very intently at the pancakes he's flipping, he can't let them burn after all. He hears Cas tiredly greet Jack, as he unplugs the griddle. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Cas shuffle towards the coffee pot.

"Your's is on the stove" Dean says, pointing with his spatula, refus-without turning around. Cas just hums as a thanks. He may still be an angel, but whenever he does sleep, he is not a morning person.

Dean busies himself making plates for him and Cas, waiting until he hears the scrape of a chair before daring to turn around.

Dean quietly takes a deep breath. He's pretending to be married to the man, he's obviously going to have to look at him at some point.

But it's little hard to make eye contact, when you thought about those blue eyes in the show-

Something drops low in the pit of Dean's stomach and he puts both plates down, Cas isn't even awake enough to eat yet anyway so it's fine, and quickly starts wiping off the griddle with a wet paper towel instead.

Heart hammering in his chest, he squeezes his eyes shut for a second, trying to halt the panic currently clawing up his throat. He puffs out a breath.

This is ridiculous. Cas probably doesn't even know he turned into an octopus in the middle of the night, and he definitely doesn't know about Dean's-other thing.

So it's fine, because it's not like Dean's gonna tell him, any of it. Cas would probably be embarrassed about hanging on Dean in his sleep, and Dean wouldn't dare to make anything even more awkward.

So it's fine. It's good.

And with that revelation, he tosses the paper towel, grabbing their plates, and spins around before he can stop himself again.

And he's met with a very tired Cas leaning on one hand, clutching the mug close to his chest with the other, while he talks to Jack about nonsense. His hair is sticking up in every direction, and there's that smile on his lips that's reserved just for Jack.

This isn't a new sight by any means, he pretty much sees this every day now. But this is different.

Because technically he's seeing it in their kitchen. Sam and Eileen won't come stumbling in, it's just them. Alone.

And that swirling feeling, that Dean is realizing might be butterflies-but they definitely aren't because he's a grown man, and that would be ridiculous, is back with a vengeance.

Cas looks up, meeting his eyes giving him a smile that's reserved only for Dean. And those blue eyes that he-nope.

Dean shoves everything away, even the butte-swirling feeling, and moves, placing down Cas' plate, and sits across from him with his own.

"Thank you, good morning" Cas says after another sip of his coffee, his voice still thick with sleep.

This is just like any regular morning at the Bunker, if he ignores the details, so Dean can do this.

"Morning, finally join the land of the living?" Dean qups, taking a bite. Cas just squints, and points his fork at him accusingly

"Dean it's eight am, I distinctly remember you once saying that the land of the living doesn't begin until at least after nine" Cas smiles, proud of his little joke.

"Yeah but we're in the burbs now, didn't you hear the new rules? Tell him Jack" Dean smirks pointing his fork right back.

"Yeah, Da!" Jack shouts, and hey at least the kid is on his side.

Cas just rolls his eyes fondly and goes back to his food. And Dean definitely doesn't stare at him, especially not since he realizes Cas is wearing one of his old shirts.

Which again, isn't new, Cas does it all the time and Dean definitely doesn't care. But like everything else, this is different.

Because they're in a white marble kitchen, with the sunlight shining through the windows, eating pancakes that Dean cooked, with a child sitting in between them.

It's domestic, too domestic. Because now that feeling (the one Dean doesn't talk about) is bubbling up, joining with the butterfl-swirling feeling an-

"So, I saw a park on our way in yesterday. I thought we should take Jack today, it's much bigger than the park in Lebanon. And it would allow us to talk to some of the parents, to see if any of them were friends with Carol and Mike Stanton, or any of the other vics?" Cas suggested placing his fork on his plate.

The feeling immediately deflates, which Dean definitely doesn't care about. He's definitely glad it's gone.

Right, case, they're working a case. This Dean can handle.

"Sounds like a good idea as any, us pushing Jack on the swings, will put on a good show for whatever's out there. Plus, I bet these stay-at-home parents love will love to gossip about the murders of their neighbors" Dean points out which earns a huffed laugh from Cas.

Good thing they're both on the same page about these suburban bureaucrats. They're gonna be a nightmare, Dean can feel it.

"We can also definitely try to narrow down who the next vic could be, in case whatever it is we're hunting, decides it's tired of targeting just this house." Cas tacks on

"Yeah, but hopefully it'll just stick with us, make everything a hell of a lot simpler" Dean sighs, easily shifting into "hunter mode".

"And I think it'll be good for Jack to play with children his age. Oh, which reminds me. Jack, we need to have a serious conversation" Cas says calmly, folding his hands on the table, looking to Dean to make sure he understands.

"Yeah kiddo, we gotta talk about your angel mojo" Dean says, matching Cas' tone.

And with that, they have Jack's full attention. He may not even be two, but he's always been able to understand everything they say, which doesn't mean he always listens, but he knows what they're saying. They've all chalked it up to the half-angel.

"So I know we're in a different place, but the rules are still the same. No using your powers outside of our house, or this new house. Understand?" Cas stated simply but seriously.

"Yes Da, understand," Jack nods, trying to match Cas' serious face to the point where Dean had to hide a laugh behind his hand.

"Alright! Why don't you and your Dad go get dressed, and then we can go to the park" Dean said ramping up the excitement for Jack's sake.

"Park? Yay!" Jack cheers from his little booster seat.

"Dean, you made breakfast, I can clean up-"

"Cas we have this argument like every day at home, go get dressed I've got it. Plus I'm already dressed, see" Dean smiles gesturing to his flannel and jeans for effect.

Cas hesitates for a moment like he always does, but then he scoops up Jack and makes his way up the stairs.

As soon as Dean's sure they're out of sight, he slumps down against the counter, putting his head in his hands. After he collects himself to the best of his ability, he shoves off and starts cleaning up from breakfast. Which serves as a great distraction until he hears footsteps on the stairs again.

Dean grips the counter he's wiping off and stares up at the ceiling.

"Get it together Winchester. You're working a case, so act like it" Dean whispers to himself

And it hits him. This is all an act, so Dean just has to act like he doesn't care, like he isn't always one step away from a breakdown whenever Cas looks at him.

A foolproof plan, what could go wrong?

So with a deep breath, he turns around like a very professional hunter who's ready to pretend to be married to his best friend, which he definitely does not care about it at all because it's all an act.

But then he sees Cas standing in a gray sweater, jeans, and a long, deep blue peacoat that Dean has definitely never seen. And he loo-

"Ready to go?" Cas asks with a smile as he bounces an excited Jack on his hip. And Dean swallows, managing a nod.

Right, Dean doesn't care. He's fine.

So he quickly grabs his new brown coat, Sam told him to get some nicer clothes so they could "blend", and they're out the door, squinting in the sunlight.

Then he feels warmth in his hand, and meets Cas' slightly worried eyes. So Dean just squeezes back, and pulls Cas along down the porch steps.

Because Dean is fine, because he doesn't care. He's just holding Cas' hand, nothing weird about that, it's for the case.

But the more they walk, the more Dean realizes that there are a lot of people outside. Walking dogs, pushing kids in strollers, jogging,

God it's 9:30am on Monday, don't these people have jobs?

Apparently not, because they're all out here, and they can all see Dean. Holding Cas' hand.

And yeah okay maybe Dean does care, a little, it's all for an act, but he-

Cas' squeezes his hand tightly, and that electricity from yesterday shoots through Dean again. He glances over at Cas, who gives him a smile, and finds himself unable to turn away.

Cas can always sense when Dean was on the verge of a freakout, it was probably the angel mojo, but that didn't mean Cas always had to hel-

"Hi! You must be the new neighbors!" A voice calls, causing Dean and Cas to stall in their tracks, ending their staring contest.

Standing in front of them on the sidewalk was a couple, probably around their ag-well Dean's age. A shorter woman with a messy bun, and a guy around Cas' height, both wearing what looked like workout clothes. How pretentious.

But they didn't look like the rest of these rich asshats, especially since their clothes weren't full of designer logos.

"Sorry we just saw you moving in yesterday, we live a few houses up from you guys" The woman continued with a smile.

"That's was us, I'm Dean Richardson, this is my husband Cas. Oh and this is Jack" Dean said putting on a fake smile and holding out a hand, trying to ignore the way husband rolled so easily off his tongue.

"Oh sorry, where are our manners! I'm Jason Davidson, and this is my wife Molly. It's great to meet you, and this little guy too" Jason said as they shook their hands, giving a little wave to Jack.

"Can you say hi baby?" Cas said bouncing Jack a little

"Hi! I'm Jack I'm gonna be two" Jack said giving his award-winning smile and earning a laugh from Molly and Jason.

"We were just out on a run, and figured you'd want to meet some friendly faces first. Ya know, before you run into the bitches of the neighborhood since you guys seemed like normal, sane people" Molly laughed, which pulled a surprised laugh from Dean and Cas.

Yeah, definitely not like the rest of the rich asshats.

"Shoot! I'm so sorry for the language, little ears. But I just got off a forty-minute phonecall with Amanda, where she-"

"What Molly is failing to subtlely ask is, have you met Amanda and Bill yet?" Jason said quickly cutting off Molly's rant.

"No, I can't say that we have? Right, sweetheart?" Cas asked, amusement hinting in his voice. And the butterfl-swirling thing definitely didn't make an appearance at how naturally Cas tacked on the term of endearment. Because It's an act and Dean definitely doesn't care.

"They practically run the entire neighborhood. Amanda is the head of neighborhood watch, and the party planning committee. And her husband Bill is her right-hand man" Molly explained, and Dean and Cas exchanged a look.

"She's been all over us since it's our turn to host the annual-" Jason starts.

"Oh speaking of, you're both invited! It's a giant barbeque at our house, the entire neighborhood is attending" Molly smiles cutting in.

"A barbeque? In November" Dean asks, playing along.

"It's actually called 'Pleasant Acres' Annual Autumn Banquet' but we call it 'Barbeque Bonfire Night', to piss off Amanda, Bill, and their groupies. You're lucky you moved in the year we got stuck hosting, or else you'd be sipping wine to Chopin in Amanda's backyard" Jason winks.

"We've got booze, burger, wings, ribs you name it! It starts tonight at five, we know you just moved in, but it would be a great way to meet the rest of the neighborhood" Molly suggests. Dean turns to Cas to see a raised eyebrow and a look that says, "yes we have to go".

Well, maybe they'll be other "normal" people like Molly and Jason. Dean's starting to like them anyway.

"Thank you for the invitation, we'll definitely be there" Cas smiles turning back to them.

"What should we brin-"Dean starts, knowing it's polite to offer.

"Nope none of that, just bring yourselves! You just moved in, we've got everything covered, just com-"Jason began only to be cut off by a ringtone.

"Great, it's Amanda. I've gotta take it our she'll keep calling. Party starts at five, our house is number 2241, can't miss it! See you tonight!" Molly shouts, and with a wave, they're both making their way down the sidewalk.

"Well, that worked out nicely. All of the neighborhood in one place" Cas chuckled beside him.

"Yeah, now we've gotta spend the night schmoozing rich douc-not nice people, for info" Dean grumbled, catching himself. Little ears after all.

Cas just huffed a laugh, and began dragging Dean down the rest of the sidewalk.

Wait was Cas holding his hand the entire time? And he didn't even notice? Dean feels the heat creep up his neck, but it's fine because Dean definitely doesn't care.

"Well, we're definitely going to have to talk to Amanda and Bill, since they're the head of neighborhood watch" Dean groans ignoring the flush rising to his cheeks.

"I know, but apparently they aren't very good at their job, since three couples were murdered under their watch. So maybe the conversation won't be long" Cas supplies, which startles a laugh out of Dean.

"And at least Molly and Jason seem nice. So maybe they have some non-not nice people, friends" Cas continues and Dean barks a laugh.

"Wow two jokes in a row, when's your standup tour start?" Dean teases. 

He doesn't have to look over to know Cas is smiling. So he knocks him with his shoulder, and then pointedly ignores the lightning that runs through his veins at the touch. And thankfully he doesn't have much time to pointedly ignore anything, since they arrive at the park, and immediately steer Jack towards the smaller, toddler equipment.

Because Dean is far too focused on continuously placing Jack on the top of the tiny slide, so he can slide down in Cas' waiting arms, to care about how the sight makes his heart twist.

And he's far too focused on Jack laughing in the baby swing, to care about how looking at how happy Cas is pushing him, causes that swirling feeling to swim around his stomach.

And he far too focused on Jack in his arms, to even care about the way Cas seems to be slightly leaning into him, as they walk hand and hand back to the house.

And he'd far too focused on going over the facts of the case with Cas at the kitchen table, during Jack's nap, to even care about how Cas' hair is still wildly windblown.

And he's too focused during their phone call with Sam, to care about how Cas' is sitting across from him, cheeks still tinged pink from the wind.

 And he's too focused on everything, to even care about how they're gonna have to pretend to be a loving couple tonight, in front of hundreds of people. And how he might have to even kiss Cas.

 Nope, Dean definitely doesn't care at all.

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