#this fic makes just under 90k words of genrex fic written since may. i wanna get to 100k

[neopuff]

title: trust word count: ~3100 ships: six/holiday summary: Holiday learns more than she bargained for. ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50254363

Rex sat on the edge of the examination table in Dr. Holiday’s lab, swinging his legs back and forth. He felt jittery. He felt uncomfortable and kind of bad. He’d had a weird morning already and it was barely even eight o’clock.

Six dropped him off at the lab unceremoniously, grumbling about something and then storming off without any explanation. When he got moody like that, Rex struggled to understand if it was his fault - something he did or said - or if Six just…was like that sometimes. For a fourteen-year-old, it was very confusing. But after so many months of his mentor’s emotional distance, Rex was getting used to it.

“Hey, Doc?”

Holiday turned around to face her patient, reflex hammer in-hand. “Hm?”

Rex pouted slightly and tapped the table noisily. He liked the feeling of moving his legs and tapping away on hard surfaces. It kind of relaxed him. “How well do you know Six?”

She frowned and turned her head slightly, looking confused. “Um…I’m not really sure. Why do you ask?”

“Well…I asked him something earlier and he kind of got mad about it,” Rex admitted with a shrug, tapping away.

“What’d you ask him?” Holiday stepped closer and put a hand over one of his, stopping the tapping.

He continued tapping with his other hand, though. “I just asked if there were people named One or Three or Four or if he was just weird.” Rex moved his hands to his knees and started tapping there instead, figuring Holiday wouldn’t mind since it wasn’t as noisy. “I still think it’s not that weird of a question for a guy named Six.”

She gave him a small smile and chuckled. “I’m sure you didn’t upset him, Rex. He’s just very private.”

“Yeah, sure, but…I mean, don’t you wanna know, too?” Rex lightly chewed at the inside of his cheek. “Sometimes I feel like I don’t know anything about him.”

Holiday looked sympathetic, stuck in the same boat as him. She and Rex spent more time with Six than anyone else they worked with, but where he came from or why he had the skills he did were mysteries to the both of them. “Of course I’d like to know, but it’s important to respect his privacy. I’m sure Six will share what he feels like you need to know.”

Rex pouted again and threw his hands up in the air. “Boo! That’s so lame. Sometimes it feels like I’m not allowed to be curious about anything here!”

“You know what I’m curious about?” she asked with a smile. “Why you lost control of your Boogie Pack in the Zoo today. What’s going on?”

He calmed down and stared at her, suddenly embarrassed. “Um…well. I don’t know.” Rex stared down at his hands and twitched his fingers one at a time. “I guess it was ‘cause of Six being mad at me.”

Holiday paused, frowning. She knew that Six’s attitude had a significant impact on Rex’s behavior and emotions, though Six really didn’t like it when she tried to lecture him about it. But his dismissal of Rex’s feelings could hurt them both if they didn’t do something about it. “Can you tell me exactly how you felt?”

Rex didn’t look up at her. “Yeah, um…he got all weird and told me to stop asking annoying questions. And then my head felt hot and my chest started to hurt and then I fell.”

She was writing down what he said, but really, Holiday already knew. Rex had had the same experience four other times in the past two months, all because of Six scolding him or dismissing him in one way or another. They were getting to the point where she would have to have to harangue him about it.

“I appreciate you telling me, Rex,” she said softly, putting a hand on his arm. “I’ll talk to Six, okay?”

He shrugged awkwardly. “You don’t have to do that, Doc. He’s just being Six, right?”

“...right,” she answered quietly. “Just being Six.”

X

Holiday scrolled through the fifteenth page of data on her newest EVO specimen, trying to see if anything stood out as unique from the last three she’d analyzed. She’d already fed the data through her computer, but in an act of paranoia, she still felt like it was important to scan over everything with her own two eyes. Computers could make mistakes, after all.

But so could very tired human beings. And she was already feeling the weight of the day - Rex continued to have a bad time after their initial conversation, especially when it turned out that Six had gone MIA and no one could get a hold of them. White Knight assured everyone (with a frustrated frown on his face) that this was just something Six did sometimes, but Holiday still felt very annoyed.

It was one thing to make Rex feel bad, but then disappearing right afterwards made it a lot worse. She had every plan to pull the man aside for a discussion as soon as he came back, but according to Knight, that could very well be a few days. She’d be too distracted by other work by then, Holiday was sure of that.

Just as she leaned back in her chair, trying to decide whether to get some coffee or finally head to her room - the door to Holiday’s lab suddenly opened and familiar footsteps entered the room.

She turned around and found herself staring directly at the man on her mind, who glanced at her briefly before continuing towards the drawer across from her examination table. He didn’t say anything and was holding his shoulder uncomfortably.

“Six?”

He didn’t respond, opening another drawer and then another one.

Annoyed, Holiday stood up and walked to the other side of the table. As she got closer, she took note of the red stain seeping out from under his hand. “What are you looking for?”

Still not answering, he pulled a small roll of bandages out of the drawer and closed it, immediately starting to leave the room.

“Hey!” She reached out and grabbed his arm, hooking her fingers around his elbow. “What’s going on?” Though the lights in the lab were low, Holiday could see that aside from the blood under his hand, his suit was sporting several dark stains and tears. He looked like he’d been through a particularly difficult fight.

Six stopped in place, not pulling away from her. He took a few moments before turning his head and facing her directly. “I’m fine.”

She stood her ground. “You don’t look fine.”

He pulled his arm out of her grasp and held up the roll of bandages. “I was trying not to bother you, Doctor. Just needed these.”

Holiday stared at him, frowning deeply. This wasn’t an unusual tete-a-tete for them, but he seemed even more closed-off from her than usual. After months and months of working together, she was starting to recognize signs that he was upset. “It’ll bother me more if you don’t let me help you.”

A pause, then a barely audible sigh, and Six relented. Either he let her win or there’d be an unnecessary argument and it wasn’t worth the effort. He walked over to the examination table and took off his jacket and shirt, tossing them down without much care. The room wasn’t as bright as usual with the Petting Zoo’s lights off, but there was enough light to see his shirt was completely ruined.

She’d noticed the blood stain already, but Holiday’s eyes were immediately drawn to the bruises all over Six’s torso. He had strangely-shaped bruises on his back and his sides, and tight, thin bruises twisting around his wrists and up his arms. Then there were three small stab wounds near his shoulder, where the blood was coming from.

“Where have you been all day?” she asked quietly, gently pushing him so he’d sit down (carefully avoiding his new bruises).

“Out.”

Holiday pouted and lightly chewed the inside of her cheek, annoyed at his response. “Right. It’s private, I get it.”

He didn’t respond verbally, taking a shaky breath when her hand accidentally brushed against one of the arm bruises. “I just need the bleeding to stop. I’m fine otherwise.”

“You are definitely not,” she said sternly, cleaning the wounds quickly. There was a minute of silence while she bandaged the area - first putting down a square gauze pad, then wrapping that with more gauze and the roll of bandages. She was very tempted to yell at him, but knew it was pointless. There was no point in bringing up what had happened with Rex that morning, not when he was in this state. And whatever had happened while he was out was his own business and he wouldn’t want to talk about it either, especially not with her.

There was a little bit of bitterness in her thoughts - in her very tired mind, she felt frustrated at how much he knew about her compared to how much she knew about him. Obviously their situations were drastically different, but it didn’t feel good. Made her feel like an afterthought.

With barely a thought connected to the words coming out of her mouth, simply the memory of her conversation with Rex earlier in the day, she muttered, “I hope these injuries aren’t from Three, Four, and Five.”

It was said before she realized it, and Holiday closed her eyes in regretful awkwardness as she felt Six glaring at her like she’d grown a second head. She hadn’t meant to say anything about that out loud - he’d know she was thinking about his life and trying to figure him out. Obviously she was interested in him, but she didn’t want to make him uncomfortable.

She glanced up at him to see that Six had turned his gaze away from her and had an unreadable expression as he looked towards the door.

“I…sorry. I was just kidding,” she said quietly, patting down the last of the bandages. “Didn’t mean to pry.”

Six put his bloody shirt back on, stood up, took one step towards the door, then stopped. He shoved his hands into his pockets and stayed completely silent and still for a few moments before suddenly turning around and glaring down at Holiday.

She stared back up, surprised.

“Do you understand the kind of person I am, Dr. Holiday?” he said quietly, but aggressively. “Do you know why I’m called Six?”

“I, um…” Holiday felt nervous, suddenly, and couldn’t keep her eyes on his face. She hadn’t expected him to get so serious.

He took a purposefully intimidating step forward. “I’m a killer. Trained from a young age to trade human lives for cash.”

She didn’t respond, and he took that as an initiative to keep going.

“I didn’t discriminate, Doctor. I killed anyone that I was paid to kill.” He spoke to her like he was lecturing a child - everything came across as a strange combination of explanation and warning. “All that mattered to me was the dollar amount given.”

Holiday decided, in that moment, to stand her ground. She stood up straighter and stared directly at his face, though everything he was saying made her very uncomfortable. She didn’t deny that she suspected as much - but it was still just…strange. For the closest thing she had to a friend to be a trained assassin felt like something out of a bad movie.

“They call me Six because I’m the sixth deadliest man in the world,” he said sternly, taking another step. He was wearing his usual sour frown, but it was paired with a twinge of upset. He didn’t want to reveal all of this to Holiday. He didn’t want her to have more reason to be scared of him.

Instead of being scared, however, she took a step towards him. She was holding her arms in front of herself, but otherwise looked like she wanted to reach out. “...did something happen today?”

He exhaled through his nose, wishing she’d yelled at him or run away or anything other than show concern. Six couldn’t look at her eyes for another second and glared down at the white floor. “I’ve taken 348 lives. Human lives. That doesn’t even begin to touch the number that One or Dos has taken.”

Holiday’s frown grew more pronounced and she held herself tighter. He didn’t even seem like he’d heard her.

“I’m not even including the EVOs I’ve killed - who knows how many of those were human,” he continued, almost rambling. His gaze wandered around the room, never coming back to the woman in front of him.

As she noticed him trying to avoid looking at her, Holiday started to reach out one hand - not sure what she was even doing. Her hand hovered in front of him for a brief moment before she pulled it back, feeling weird. “Why are you telling me this?” she asked quietly.

He couldn’t find a reason to ignore that question and finally looked back at her face. The amount of concern she had for him was agitating - she was so good and kind and it made Six feel almost nauseous thinking that she cared about him as much as she did. Their companionship was supposed to be one of convenience - working together to save humanity. They couldn’t really be friends. And they certainly couldn’t be more. Not when she was so good and he was so…

“You should be more aware of the type of people you work with,” he said simply, like it was the most obvious answer in the world.

The way that she tried to joke with him and reach out to him and get to know him better…Six wished she understood that he wasn’t safe to be around for long. And the more distance he put between them, the safer and happier she’d ultimately be.

Holiday gave him an incredulous expression - she was confused and understandably agitated by him. She somehow knew that he wasn’t intending to offend her, but the suggestion that she was so naive that she didn’t know she was surrounded by killers was insulting. She knew the world she was in, and even if she never wanted to be a part of it - she was in. She was a part of it.

Still. She could tell he was going through something and chose not to yell at him - instead she reached out her arm again and gently grabbed his hand - avoiding his wrist where she remembered seeing dark bruises twisting around his skin. “I trust you, Six. You know that, right?”

He stared down at her, eyebrows furrowed together.

“You can trust me, too,” she added, giving him a small, sad smile.

Six wanted her to be safe. He wanted her to live a long, happy life, with a normal human Beverly and Rex, and a big family. He wanted her to be surrounded by people that loved and respected her. And he didn’t want her to get stuck just because they’d grown close. He didn’t want her to give up on anything she wanted just because she wanted it with him.

He knew he was being ridiculous. Six knew that Holiday could never have a truly normal life, not with her level of scientific fame and certainly not while there were still EVOs and nanites in the world. She’d always be in danger somewhere, whether he was with her or not.

The logic didn’t stop his heart from aching when she spoke. Of course he could trust her. She was Holiday.

“...I do trust you,” he said softly, wishing he could say the same about himself.

She squeezed his hand in an effort to comfort him. “I’m really sorry about whatever you went through today. It looks like it hurt.”

He held her hand back, simply on a reflex, then loosened his grip in an attempt to pull away. But he didn’t really want to pull away. He liked the feeling of her hand around his. “I’m fine.”

“Okay,” she responded, finally moving her hand away. “Just…be careful, alright? We need you here.”

Six stared at her and felt a violent ache spread throughout his chest. With all his thoughts jumbled together - everything about wanting to stay away from her and keep her safe and how she was good and he was bad and there was no way they could ever be friends if there wasn’t a world to save - one last thought focused itself in his mind. The thought that, maybe, if Holiday felt like he was worth being close to, then maybe there was no reason to fight it. Maybe his growing feelings for her were some indication that he was capable of more than he thought. Maybe the strange relationships he’d forged with Rex and Holiday were proof that he wasn’t just a killing machine loyal to one master.

Maybe.

He gave her a curt nod and grabbed his suit jacket before finally exiting the lab. He clearly needed to get some sleep.

Holiday stood there in her lab - alone and uncomfortable and awkward. She glanced at the exam table next to her and saw little drops of Six’s blood. She quickly grabbed a rag to clean it up and hoped that the repetitive motion would temporarily distract her from what just happened.

What had just happened, exactly? She learned a lot more about Six than she ever expected to.

She learned a lot more about Six than she ever really wanted to, if she was being honest with herself.

It was a very stressful situation she’d found herself in. Despite the information she’d just learned, Holiday still found herself drawn to him in ways she’d never felt before about anyone. She knew that the man he was today mattered more than the man he was before, but…it was still a lot. He’d killed so many people. But at Providence, he saved so many lives every day. They all did.

She wondered briefly if he felt his work with them was repentance.

Holiday tossed the rag into the sink and sighed. She didn’t know where she stood with Six or where Six stood with her, but she knew one thing for sure: she would not be telling Rex any of what she’d just learned.