#this also means i get to post the funniest image i have ever drawn | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

junker-town · 4 years ago

Text

Mud, wind and a ‘soggy ball’: the story of the USA’s first basketball gold medal

In the 1936 Olympics, basketball was played outdoors on a dirt court. A storm during the final showed why that was such a bad idea.

The 1936 Summer Olympics were, famously, something of a mess. Hosted in Berlin, they provided Hitler’s regime the perfect canvas from which to propagandize, and the rest of the world knew it. But we’re not going to talk about the Nazis today. At least, not very much. Because the Berlin Olympics weren’t just notable for providing PR cover to a murderous parade of genocides. They were also the coming out party for America and Olympic Basketball.

Team USA won gold, of course — I won’t make you wait for that non-shocker — but their journey there was a fiasco which culminated in one of the weirdest, muddiest basketball games of all time. Let’s explore.

Getty Images

The winning team

Expectations for the American team’s first Olympic venture were naturally high. While international basketball was just becoming A Thing, college hoops had been thriving for decades, leaving the United States the obvious favorite in a sport which was only just starting to catch on with the rest of the world.

Indeed, basketball was so popular in the States that it was expected to power the rest of the American Olympic delegation. Back then, teams were meant to be self-funding, which meant they had to raise the cost of travel themselves. Avery Brundage, President of the American Olympic Committee, hoped that basketball might change that, bringing in enough cash during qualifying tournaments that the smaller sports didn’t have to scramble to fund themselves.

This was a nice idea that went badly wrong. At the end of June, Brundage was forced to announce that the AOC had a funding deficit of $146,000. Basketball hadn’t solved their problems. In fact, the proposed American basketball team of 13 players and three coaches hadn’t even managed to fund itself.

Things had gotten heated long before that point. The AOC at large clashed with their director of basketball, Phog Allen, who was both one of the most important figures in the history of the game and the man who had done more than anyone else to get the sport to the Olympics. Eventually Dr. Allen quit his post, citing ‘deceitful political bartering;’ the AOC responded with the outrageous claim that he’d never actually worked with them in the first place.

Would you trust a man who wore this tie?

Brundage, meanwhile, was thwarting the proposed boycott of Hitler’s games and proudly embracing anti-Semitic support: “[T]he fact that the Jews are against us will arouse interest among thousands of people who have never subscribed before, if they are properly approached.” According to Carolyn Mervyn, writing decades later, Brundage’s political interest (although, like all of his ilk, he claimed that there was no space in sports for politics) was in thwarting communism, and he considered Nazi Germany a friend in that venture. This is all to say Avery Brundage was a huge asshole.

How big an asshole? Well, on the Olympic basketball front, he managed to forget a basketball enthusiast named Dr. James Naismith. If you’re not familiar with the history of sport, this is notable because Dr. Naismith invented basketball. The Lincoln Evening Journal quotes Olympic referee Jim Tobin as claiming that Naismith, then 74, was deliberately omitted from the guest list:

Dr. Naismith arrived in Germany without even a pass to see a game. We managed to get him a pass for all games, but it was not [through] the American Olympic committee’s efforts. He was ignored there and his name was stricken from the pass list. What’s more, no ceremony was planned for Dr. Naismith, who is naturally the most important figure in basketball.

While Naismith (who was invited, eventually to hand out the medals after the final) languished, Brundage was amusing himself by kicking swimmer Eleanor Holm off the team. According to Brundage’s version of events, Holm, who’d won gold in the 100-meter backstroke at the 1932 Games had been discovered ‘in an alcoholic coma.’ According to Holm’s, she had violated curfew and had had a few glasses of champagne but was busted by a staffer and referred to Brundage, who had previously put Holm on his naughty list after she had refused to sleep with him. I find one version of these events somewhat more plausible than the other.

(Holm, incidentally, refused to go away, and was in fact hired by the International News Service as a sports journalist to report on the U.S. Olympians. I find this funny for reasons I’m not sure I can fully articulate.)

Surely, though, the actual basketball would be less of a mess? Friends, it would not. The warning signs were there early, sounded by Val Bouryschkine, who, according to the Santa Cruz Sentinel, wrote to Allen detailing the expected conditions of Berliner hoops.

Play in the Olympics will be on gravel (ed note: Bouryschkine appears to mean very fine gravel — see image below). This presents several difficulties such as the impossibility of a good dribble, accurate long shots, or, in case of rain, a slippery ball. Also, the referees are unusually strict on pivots, and very often call them traveling. There is no center line, and any stalling and freezing of the ball is perfectly legal.

Lothar Ruebelt/ullstein bild via Getty Images

Probably from the ‘36 games. Note the dirt/gravel ‘court’.

To the Americans, for whom basketball had been a wholly mature sport for decades, the notion of playing on gravel rather than nice maple floors was both alien and deeply concerning. But the US basketball team was far too good to let that stop them. Drawn from the best amateur teams in the country, they featured players like Joe Fortenberry, immortalized as the world’s first dunker, and Willard Schmidt, who may well have been the second (but wasn’t the MLB pitcher).

They were also big. The McPherson Globe Refiners, who contributed six to the Olympic roster, were described by one gushing sportswriter in the Corsicana Daily Sun as “the sky-scrapingest group of hoopsters ever assembled under one banner,” which just goes to show how far the art of writing has declined since mid-century. Tolkien would have given ‘cellar door’ far shorter shrift had he ever come across prose like this.

The US beat Estonia 52-28 in their first matchup, then dispatched the Philippines 56-23 in their second. This was actually the fourth round, because a) the US had received a bye and b) Spain hadn’t showed up for what would have been their first match. This is normally blamed on the outbreak of the Spanish Civil War, led to the death of Federico García Lorca three days after the gold medal game. But the liberal Spanish government was planning on boycotting the Games anyway, so the Civil War mostly meant that Spain extra extra didn’t show up.

Having reached the semifinals, the gulf in class began contracting. Mexico managed to hold the Americans to a mere 25 points, but they couldn’t do anything in return in a 25-10 game. Canada, meanwhile, had romped to victory against Poland in the other semi, beating them 42-15. A delicious-looking gold medal matchup was on offer.

But. Remember Bouryschkine’s warning? “Or, in case of rain, a slippery ball.” That hadn’t been tested until the final, but on August 15th an afternoon storm hammered Berlin, and it turned out that that warning had actually been understated. Not only did the ball get slippery, it was so wet out that it ended up downright waterlogged. Oh, and increasingly high winds made it almost impossible to pass. To top things off, the ‘gravel’ court turned out to have been a gravel-on-dirt court, which quickly degraded into ‘mudpit’.

The image I have in my head for this game — sadly I can’t find any footage online — is essentially the funniest basketball game of all time. The Montreal Gazette does nothing to dispel this impression, noting that the court had been turned “into a skating rink by the incessant downpour” and that “a high wind did weird things with a soggy ball,” a phrase I think I must add to my earlier digression on ‘30s sportswriter prose.

The second half, if you’ll credit it, was even worse. “[T]he teams were so worn out from trucking through the mud, and cold from the raw wind that they slowed to a walk.” This honestly sounds more like a description of Passchendaele than a basketball game. In fact basketball can barely be said to have been played after halftime at all: eight points were scored. In total. All half.

Art: Tyson Whiting

The final score was a hilarious 19-8 in favor of the Americans (top scorer Fortenberry matched the Canadians singlehanded), who presumably had a nice long wash between extracting themselves from their miserable mudbowl and accepting their medals. These “towering men with speed to burn and sharp-shooting eyes” had won the first of the United States’ many basketball golds, overcoming a bizarre set of scandals and an incredible attack by the forces of nature herself.

For some reason, when the Olympics returned after World War II, basketball had been moved to an indoor court.

0 notes

monkeydluffy19920 · 7 years ago

Note

😭 - Saddest scene? 😆 - Funniest scene? 🌧 - Saddest backstory? 😎 - Funniest joke? 👂 - Favorite quote? 🔍 - What do you think the One Piece is?

One Piece ask-meme - @chefalier

😭 - Saddest scene?

One Piece has so many heartbreaking chapters so it’s really hard to pick the saddest because all of them throws the feel of waves in their own way. I’l pick a couple of them

Brook loses his former crew All of the pasts of Straw Hats are incredibly sad and this would be quite a long post if I listed all of them so I’ll pick on and it’s the flashback where the Rumbar pirates play Bink’s sake together for the very last time. Brook wanting to make their last moment memorable and watching his friends fall one by one while he keeps playing their song for Laboon… just imagining how bad it must’ve felt hurts the heart a lot :’

Luffy handling the death of Ace One of those scenes that I sill find hard to watch without tears was Ace’s death but I find the aftermath at least as sad as losing Ace. After learning Luffy’s past, about his sworn brothers and his greatest fear, the scenes where he is at his breaking points (chapters 582 and 590) becomes even more emotional and meaningful in my opinion. Luffy had already lost Sabo suddenly so dealing with the images of the dead body of his big brother who took the bullet for him was wrecking, especially when Luffy had promised to become stronger so he wouldn’t lose anyone anymore and which made it even worse was that in previous arc he had lost his nakamas since Kuma tossed them all around the Grand Line. Those chapters really showed Luffy being at his lowest point while he was going through that huge sorrow (he couldn’t bring his careless self to ease out the situation when he mourned for Ace and it’s really sad) :’

Luffy vs Sanji Since that battle was focusing on 3 of my favorite Straw hats the chapters and episode about it are still really difficult to handle without becoming gloomy about it. Sanji was forced to do things he’d never do otherwise (mock his friends, glare coldly at Nami-san and duel with captain) and on top of that he had to kick stubborn Luffy out of the game so they would leave plus he also got an unexpected slap from Nami who also dropped the honorifics which is quite unusual since she always used to call him Sanji-kun. When he thought that the worst would be over and he could just disappear in shadows then there is Luffy who stands up with his last powers and declares a food strike against Sanji. It’s still such an impressive move from someone who has a bottomless stomach and an eternal appetite and it shows how much respect he has towards his cook and how well he knows him (telling him to quit acting and how he can’t become a pirate king if someone is missing). No wonder Sanji (or us fans) couldn’t hold the tears :’

😆 - Funniest scene?

Ahahah, I love so many dorky moments I can’t decide only one so I’ll again list few of them xDD

Api’s foodThis is just from filler where they find that little girl named Apis and then as a gratitude for them to save her she cooks for them. Their faces are priceless when they see that nicely burnt and “seasoned” food and when they try it (and Sanji has hard times not to show up how upset he is to see Apis wrecking the kitchen and utensils), instant kill XD

Meeting Crokus Maybe one of the funniest scenes ever was when they met Crokus inside Laboon. All that tension (especially in anime) because of a stranger who ends up just trolling them and making Zoro and Sanji losing their minds and nerves a big time is simply one piece of gold XD

Operation Usopp saves NamiUsopp and Nami are one of my brOTPs because they have are a bit similar to each other and as “coward duo” they tend to end up dealing with the tough scenes together xD One of the funniest moment in Skypiea is definitely when Sanji and Usopp rush to save Nami from Enel (thanks to Sanji’s mellorine radar XD). Then when Usopp finally arrives, just in time and can’t see Sanji anywhere so he just shuts the door like “k, bye” XDD BUT he is a brave warrior after all so he goes and tries his best to survive with her against Enel! (and he did quite well tbh, I mean, could’ve been worse)

Mugiwaras get their bounties after Enies Lobby How can anyone forget that priceless moment when the Franky family shows them the new bounties. Nami and Chopper aren’t happy but the poorest of them all is definitely Sanji who was expecting a cool picture and ends up seeing that drawn face, so much disappointment and on top of that, later he speaks perfect poneglyph XDDD

🌧 - Saddest backstory?

This has been always one of the toughest questions to answer, like mentioned earlier, each of the Straw Hats has such sad pasts but maybe currently the saddest for me is Sanji’s. Before this newest arc, I was always wondering if Sanji still has something else than what we learned in Baratie (because well it was kinda odd that such a young boy was traveling alone and somehow I just had a feeling that there is more to come) and when we finally learned what the truth was… gosh, my heart cried. I mean first of all, Sanji had such an unfair and distant father who was disrespecting and neglecting his own biological son just because one of the sons didn’t fulfill his ambitions. Secondly, he locked his own child behind the bars with an iron mask and faked his death and ugh… it feels bad to think about how painful it must’ve been for someone so young and honestly Sanji could’ve become salty and destructive but getting a father figure like Zeff really saved him from Turmoil.

😎 - Funniest joke?

I’m trash for all kinds of jokes that have been spinning around One Piece but maybe the funniest running gag is Zoro’s sense of direction. It’s so damn relatable to see him get lost even in the straight paths and ends up into the weirdest places wherever he dashes in a hurry XD not that I’d suck in navigating or anything *whistling*

👂 - Favorite quote?

I’ve listed few favorites to this post and will refer to that but my absolute favorite is the following:

“No matter how hard or impossible it is, never lose sight of your goal.”

It’s a shame that I still can’t remember detailed where this is from but I think that’s not only knitting together Luffy’s life philosophy but also the whole idea of One Piece, it’s a series about chasing dreams after all.

🔍 - What do you think the One Piece is?

Since this series is all about seeking for freedom and chasing dreams I would like to think that even the legendary One Piece everyone is looking for is linked to those themes.

I just hope it’s not just a single piece of scroll or paper that says “yarr, well done! / the journey that you walk is more important than the destination ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ ” but I wouldn’t be surprised if Oda wanted to makee Gol D. Roger troll the finder a bit, somehow XD Some people think it’s a crown and it sounds quite plausible but on the other hand I’d like to believe that it’s more than that, maybe a totality of something bigger (like there is obviously some gold, berries and other treasure but among that there is also something else that makes finding One Piece even more valuable?)

#answered #thanks #chefalier #one piece meme #randomness #speculations #sorry mate that it took so long!#was fun to reply these memes!#(and got carried way with this xD)

7 notes · View notes

applegelstore · 7 years ago

Text

I actually wanted to wait with this until I hit, like, a nice follower count milestone or something like that, but… I felt like it. So, I just wanted to thank everyone of you who’s following this blog from the bottom of my heart. It’s still a pitifully small number, but I feel like I actually have loyal fans. So, thank you all for every single like, reblog, and especially those among you who commissioned me or even donated to my Ko-Fi! You know who you are. Some people also like or reblog my stuff frequently (you probably also know who you are), these people are heroes. Honestly, you are all so, so sweet, and you might not even know how much this means to me.

And the best thing? Your tags. No kidding.

Rest under cut for length. You’re not gonna regret clicking it, though!

I hardly ever got tags on my original art (which also got much less notes in general, but still!), but very often I get some on my fanart. And they’re… like… the best thing… ever?  So what I did is this: I’ve collected some of the most ridiculous tags I ever got. I probably missed some of them, but I try to collect them all! I’m getting so many funny and/or sweet comments in the tags, you’re making me weep! Sometimes I got really long comments in the tags, and I’m speechless. I didn’t put those in here, but I wanted to share the most hilarious ones.

Without further ado and also without any context, I’m gonna share some of the funniest tags. (a few of them obviously were posted under the same images, but in general, I mixed these quotes up as wildly as I cold for maximum out of context hilarity). Like some kind of… gag reel.

Which ones are your favourites?

(alternatively, you can try to guess which image/post got which tag)

#goddammit hug her mikleo

#edna needs hugs just sayin'

#SOBBING

#MY BABIES

#YES PLEASE

#what the fuck this is adorable

#i love this a lot omg

# this fandom

# I am drawn more and more

#😭 good best beautiful;

#what is this sorcery

#yeutdkydlckhckh

#canon real perfect beautiful amazing

#rose my queen

#WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

#rip meebs

#!!!!!!

#bless

#excellent

#oh my god lol edna

#*Mikleo screeching in the distance*

#asedxrftghj

#awwww <3

#don't you yell at pun mama rose

#also Meebo is totally a Disney princess he just needs to get over his fear of dogs then he'll even have animals that love him

#Dhddlagjwlejh

#aaaaAAAAAA

#AAAAA

#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

#15/10 would recommend

#rose please marry me

#*crying dying noises*

#*gross sobbing*

#would also 100000% pay to transform dezel and zaveid into parrots though holy shit

#'im abraid your hair is going to need some work mikleo'

#'i dont mind combing over to do this'

#'you're really growing into your hair style'

#lailah is banned from helping

#'no need to turn this into a hairy situation'

#also wtf are 10-20 or 1000 shades of malevolence in a person

#WHAT KIND OF STUPID DIALOGUE IS THAT

#tag yourself i'm a category type 27 malevolence kaiju

#game!sorey please use your mark-5 jaegar luzrov rulay to punch and purifying the SALT IN ME

#dip 'im sorey d i p ' i m

#rip mikey boy though

#brotp for the ages

#/silent tears into the abyss

#hey...thgats fucking gay

#give rose a shepherd cloak 2k17

#!!!!

#GIVE SOREY A CAT 2KFOREVER

#TOTALLY AGREE OP

#honestly this is canon

#EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED

#now I need a fic for this too

#i'm crying omg

#kfhdkf edna

#i cry :')))))

#please let mikey boy lay his head on sorey's lap and have sorey caress those alabaster locks

#petition to release metal band t-shirt costume DLC for velvet

#CONSTANT BITCHY RESTING FACE IM CRYING

#please marry each other :'''''')))))

#GOOD

#I'M LAUGHING SO HARD LAKJDSLFKJSDLFKJSDLKFJLSDKFJLSKJFLSKFJ

#her fujikgbd

#face

#GIVE YOUR GF A CLOAK ALISHA

#pretty much

#op's art keeps me living

#rose no

#edna plz

#JESUS F U C KING CHRIST SAVE MIKLEO

#*hyperventilates*

#hhhhhhhhhhh

#cy8cyciyvuf

#gay...............gay thank you

#omg

#i’m with you velvet

#beautiful

#jyyjdgjdkydjydkyfkyfyykfflflyfludkyfkydyidkydkyclhckhckhxkh

#tsutitdkhdkhdkgsykdkgxkgckhchcykfkycykfkycjt

#y e a hhhh h h hh h h h h h h h h h h h h h h h hh

#SO ACCURATE

#GIVE ME ALL THE ZESTY/DESTINY CROSSOVERS

#1000/10 will pay to get this as a DLC costume

#thiS IS SO GOOD GOD BLESS YOU

#[SLAMS HANDS ON TABLE] hi yeah this is my Jam

#BABY

#i always love when people make sorey do the tongue thing

#because he totally does the tongue thing

#i support this 800% a good post

#never ever forget dezel dual weilding twin trumpets

#meebs is beautiful with waves just sayin'

#i'm crying

#i love this

#AAAAAA

#oh my god

#edna's face i can't

#i just died

#rip meebo

#*plays My Heart Will Go On on kazoo*

#what a post

#sorey: miKLEO WILLL U MARRY ME

#mikleo: u idIOT DOn"T ELECTROCUTE URSELF

#sorey: ur right i am prty cute

#mikleo: did u even hear what i said

#rose what an icon

#my inspiration

#PURE

#perfect

#bye mikleo

#baby ******** is like something from a splendid lisa frank fever dream

#I laughed

#gaahhh this is too cute

#Jhwgshshaksehhwsnbxj

#15/10 they kiss after a performance and i cry a single tear

#the universal constant

#is sorey has NO SELF PRESERVATION

#LIKE NONE

#BOY WHERE IS IT

#YOU LEFT IT IN A RUIN SOMEWHERE DIDN'T YA

#GDI SOREY

#<- a memoir by mikleo

#MY SONS

#*sobs into hands* god this is lovely

#hush rose let him be

#was almost disappointed when the link didn't actually lead to part of your world

#this is so gold

#also the HEighT diFFEREncE ♡

#also thank you for the blessing that is mikleo clinging onto sorey's buff arm

#the sweet baby slumber party is off to a rollicking good start

#lkjsdlfkJ I'M ALL FOR SOREY DIPPING MIKLEO YES

#TOOOO FUCKIN GREAT

#IMGOING TO CRY

#TOO LATE ALREADY AM

#nerds omg

#aaaaaa

#edna NO

#kajfrbnkjrebdgkhrjgbnkurjthhgnkuihjiuHLUIHFLUhglnueh

#aaand I don't know the Protagonist-kun and Protagonist-chan's names yet so in my mind they are now named Losers thanks to your art xD

#no matter which game Edna will always roast everyone

#ohhhh nOOOOOOOOO

#run while you can meebo

#told you you were gonna pay for the toddler quip

#I LOVE TJIS

#the smol tsun tsun grump is a big softie deep down

#...deep...deep...very deep down

#omg

#awwww

#will someone

#will someone write this au please..

#but i love this!

#♡

#this feels so melancholic and also i need more

#this is a gold au idea

#someone please give Mikleo a hug

#friiiiick

#PHI PLS

#HEY YOU KNOW WHO ELSE WOULD BE WILLING

#SOMEONE WHOSE NAME STARTS WITH AN M AND ENDS WITH IKLEO I'M JUST SAYING

#SUGGESTING

#LAILAH....

#Y E S

#so cute awwww

#<3333333333

#dogs are for petting and torturing meebos

#ajenfnjen

#bless Rollo

#awwww cute

#omg yes

#omg

#RUN MEEBO

#gosh...

#bless everything

#ALKJSDFLKJSDLFKJDSF

#I M AO SSODSF

#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa......

#I will never look at anything else ever again

#plz capitalize German nouns thx

#headcanon accepted!!

#BLESSED

#GOOD AND PURE CONTENT I LOVE THIS

#rip i love this artist and i love this post

*takes a deep breath* …I’m done. And I love you!

19 notes · View notes

maychorian · 7 years ago

Text

Weekly Voltron Fic Recs #40

No, it hasn’t been a week since the last one. I need to shorten the turn-around time because there are going to be WAY too many entries on these lists. Expect the next one in a few days.

Rules: You can find past weekly rec lists here, and non-list recs in my general fic rec tag. Also follow @maychorianrecs for individually tagged posts, the easier to search and reblog. This is stuff I like, and I have a huge bias toward Lance, hurt/comfort, and general fluff, in that order. Gen unless otherwise noted. Please comment on the fics if you read and enjoy them!

Culture Shock by avidbeader Words: 2,217 Author’s Summary: The team is hunting up supplies for Coran on a new planet. Keith and Pidge run up against some erroneous assumptions from the locals. My Comments: Talk about repressive societies. That’s not a planet you want to hang out on for any length of time. Love protective teammates though, as well as Pidge going firecracker-mad.

Like a Rolling Stone by Emerald_Ashes Words: 2,380 Author’s Summary: Lance had distanced himself from the blue lion since they switched pilots around. But he was still drawn to her, and finds himself wandering down to her hangar one sleepless night. My Comments: Season Three spoilers. Aw, poor Lance. I’m so glad Allura talked to him and she was able to reassure him a bit.

A Very Bland Slumber Party by genericfanatic Words: 3,252 Author’s Summary: Lance and Hunk have a surprise for everyone they want to show off. Another ‘thank you’ fic for getting 500 FOLLOWERS on my side-blog, 'blandvoltronheadcanons’ My Comments: Super adorable team bonding fic with only a hint of angst. Everyone gets to relax and have a nice time with each other.

Altea Zoo by Jenniwrites, Your_Friendly_Neighborhood_Pigeon Words: 10,763 Author’s Summary: Five semi-normal days at Altea Zoo My Comments: I’m not sure how realistic this is for how a zoo would actually work, but this is a fun, fluffy fic about the paladins in an AU where they get to hang out with animals and help each other with much more ordinary, everyday problems instead of trying to save the universe. The art is fantastic, too.

Back From the Wars by yet_intrepid Words: 1,019 Author’s Summary: Somebody is carrying him. Shiro doesn’t like it. It isn’t normal. My Comments: Oh gosh, poor Shiro. What an awful time to have a dissociative flashback. I mean, there’s never really a good time, but this one is particularly bad. Good thing he has Hunk there to ground him.

Of Gripping Nightmares and Lingering Dark by twilighteve Words: 5,265 Author’s Summary: They might have gotten Lance back, but weeks of corruption have left its mark. Wound of the body was easy to recover from; the cryopod could heal anything given enough time. Wound of the mind, wound of the soul… it was harder, much harder, to heal. Direct continuation to Of Broken Bonds and Corrupted Sou My Comments: Part of a series in which Lance gets ice powers, then is kidnapped by Haggar, who tries to corrupt him into serving the Galra Empire. This a very, very good aftermath fic, with just a ton of cuddling and hurt/comfort and supportive teammates. Poor Lance is taking quite a while to recover from him ordeal, but his friends are not giving up on him. I love it so much.

Saving Grace by JamtheDingus Words: 3,160 Author’s Summary: Shiro narrowed his eyes as he began to connect the dots. Hunk avoided his gaze, and Keith crossed his arms and met Shiro’s look head-on.“What did you two do?” “Nothing!” Hunk spoke up too quickly, all too readily admitting his guilt. — The one where Hunk and Keith steal an egg, kick some ass, and totally get away with it, too. My Comments: Absolutely adorable fantasy/mmo AU with Hunk and Keith teaming up to be awesome. I haven’t read the other fics in the series, but this stands fine alone. I really enjoyed it.

a hollow nest to dream in by lacking, Quadriviuum Words: 14,425 Author’s Summary:Shiro blinks and sees a black sun reflected on dark water, his own fingers wrapped tightly around his lion’s controls. Constellations spin overhead and a view screen flickers in front of his eyes, the images blending together like a poorly exposed photograph. There’s a sharp pull deep within his chest, a hook slipping in between two ribs that catches when it tries to lift free. Shiro becomes unfixed in space and time after vanishing from the Black Lion, slipping between alternate versions of his life. The paladins try to bring him back, but their interference could be causing more harm than good. My Comments: What an AMAZING fic. I love all the worlds Shiro visits on his unwilling journey through time and space. So many poignant moments, and wonderful characterization of everyone involved. This fic is beautiful, unsettling at times, but the conclusion is magnificent.

There are many names in history, but none of them ours by xhiro Words: 2,108 Author’s Summary: It’s hard to sleep with the feeling of blood on your hands. And Shiro has to be cursed to have had not one, but two Holts in his life. At least she seems to have just as much trouble sleeping. My Comments: A quiet, fraught moment. These two both have so much pain to bear, and a lot of it is wound up in each other.

Legendary Defenders by ravyn_sinclair Words: 2,479 Author’s Summary: It was huge, multi-colored to the point of being a psychodelic catastrophy, with simply the biggest neck hole he’d never thought he’d ever see, and a part of him wondered how Lance was even wearing it, as bunched together and hanging off of him as the piece of fabric was. “This is the greatest thing that Voltron needs, Hunk,” Lance said, a trill of excitement hiding in the barely stifled giggles of his voice as he got closer.Hunk sighed, lips tugging up unwillingly. “Oh really, that’s…that’s nice, I guess, though I don’t see how – Lance, what are you doing.” – In which Lance finds the largest, ugliest shirt and the Team Forms Voltron. My Comments: This might be the cutest, funniest thing I have ever read. I came very close to laughing aloud at work.

thunder breaks when i open my mouth by arkhmknights for darlingneverland Words: 4,193 Author’s Summary: “Were you ever frightened like this?” Allura whispered.Shiro didn’t respond, and for a moment Allura feared he’d vanished (to miss a voice in her own head—perhaps she truly was going insane). Then he whispered back: All the time. (Or: Allura, stranded and hurt on a strange planet, with only the voice of her missing friend for company. Not exactly how she planned to begin her career as a paladin.) My Comments: Interesting take on Allura as the black paladin, struggling to get along in a difficult situation. It’s a good thing Shiro is there, kind of.

The Fluffy Secret by Eastofthemoon Words: 16,868 Author’s Summary: Keith has a deep, dark secret…he’s a big softie when it comes to animals. When Hunk, Lance and Pidge discover he’s been rescuing animals and bringing them on the ship, there’s only one thing they can do! Help him take care of the animals in secret without letting Shiro, Allura or Coran finding out. My Comments: The CUTEST fic. I loved every single moment. Everyone’s reactions to Keith keeping pets was so adorable and in-character. They all really kind of desperately need therapy animals, which is kind of what this becomes, too. Lots of cute, sweet, fluffy moments.

You and the sea, talking by Veto_power_over_clocks Words: 4,435 Author’s Summary: The proper way of bonding with your lion. (“Take that, Keith!” “Lance, be nice.”) My Comments: Really beautiful bonding fic between Lance and Blue. I love Blue’s voice in this as the two of them get to know each other and Lance begins to accept her support.

Tunnel to the Sky by ImpendingExodus Words: 37,872 Author’s Summary: The Castle is in disrepair, the Galra are invading, and the Paladins only wanted to go on a day trip to the space mall. Oh well, not everyone gets what they want. Time to turn space pirate. My Comments: This is one of the fics that just grabs you and won’t let go. Once the plot gets going, it does NOT stop, with all of its twists and turns and reversals. Great suspense and tension, and the characters were all very well-written, with some touches of angst from Pidge missing her family, Lance’s insecurity, and Shiro’s PTSD.

First Space and the Right Place by Dayadhvam Words: 11,223 Author’s Summary: Shay had asked him, with the sunrise before them: “Have you ever had this feeling, to know that something so wondrous might become so common?” Yes, yes, yes. Or perhaps it was the other way around, the common becoming wondrous—when Hunk had moved from place to place in search of a new home, and learned to be more than a stranger in a strange land. My Comments: I really, really enjoyed this. Very beautiful and poignant exploration of who Hunk is and where he come and what he wants to be. Lyrical and gorgeous.

The Guardian Of Sky by ajkal2 Words: 1,394 Author’s Summary: His bedsheets when he was 6 had been decorated with rockets and stars, little astronauts floating among them. Three seconds to go.—a drabble about astronauts and cosmic lions My Comments: Really cool little fic, very descriptive and interesting, of a moment with Shiro in space.

Crushing Deep by Child_of_the_Fae Words: 4,841 Author’s Summary: During a battle on an oceanic planet, Lance is lost to the deep, and when he comes back he isn’t quite the same anymore My Comments: Very surreal plot, really grabs hold of you. I could really feel what Lance was going through, and the end was very emotional with everyone trying to get Lance back from where he’d gone.

hound by story_monger Words: 47,561 Author’s Summary: Keith has a lot of practice being alone; you might almost say he’s good at it. When he finds himself seriously injured and stranded on an unknown planet, he knows he’s not alone there. And here’s the worst part: even after rescue and after things return to normal, Keith gets the distinct sense that whatever was on that planet has followed him. He doesn’t have proof. But he knows it’s there. He knows it’s not going to stop until it gets what it wants. My Comments: What an absolutely FABULOUS fic. It’s so tightly written, so suspenseful and so engaging. I read this entire thing in one long stretch and I don’t regret a single moment. The story just grabbed me up in its fist and dragged me along. Every time I open up a huge story like this and start reading, I think, “Okay, fic. Seduce me.” And this one TOTALLY did. Can’t recommend it highly enough. There are some very unsettling and scary moments, as well as ones of great beauty, and some tip-top supportiveness and comforting. Wonderful, wonderful fic. Pay attention to the title and the way the meaning of it changes, too.

Previously Recced Fics That Updated:

Ten Days (44665 words) familiar (93596 words) Takashi Shirogane Takes the World (7701 words) Burning (20750 words) Coran's Guide to the Care and Keeping of Earthling Humans (30986 words) Bromances in Space (27212 words) Fusion Confusion (15752 words) As Color Fades Away (100533 words) Water and Blood (21648 words) The Machinations of Perception (41039 words) The Incredibly Improbable [But True] Intergalactic Adventures of Matthew J. Holt, Rebel at Large (6025 words)

Fics with spoilers for Season Three under the cut.

Over and Overture by BossToaster (ChaoticReactions) Words: 14,531 Author’s Summary: Since Shiro returned, something has been… off about him. But he deals with it, just like he’s dealt with everything else. Until the problems begin to build. My Comments: Season Three spoilers. This is everything I wanted in a post Season Three fic. Everyone is extremely well-characterized, and it just makes so much SENSE. I felt so much for poor not-Shiro, and the ending was extremely satisfying.

Allowed to Be by isabeau25 Words: 1,303 Author’s Summary: *SPOILERS FOR SEASON 3* He’s not Shiro, and they all know it. He is someone though, and he gets a say in that. My Comments: Spoilers for Season Three. Very sweet fic with Lance doing everything he can to support the new person on their team, even though he’s not Shiro.

Iterations by Azzandra Words: 3,968 Author’s Summary: To the question of when exactly Lotor was born, the answer this fic provides is: several times, actually. My Comments: Season Three spoilers. Such a fascinating concept, incredibly well-written. Haggar and Zarkon are undoubtedly evil, but the only creature they have even flashes of caring for is this son, who keeps being born and again and again. Ten thousand years is a long time.

Parallel Support by Arisprite Words: 1,811 Author’s Summary: Lance didn’t expect Keith to be knocking at his door, but he’d do his best to return the favor. But, this might be bigger than the two of them. My Comments: Season Three spoilers. I love the way Keith and Lance have gone to support each other during the new season, and this continues it, with Keith going to Lance to consult about the strangeness he’s observing in Shiro. I hope canon continues to develop their relationship like this.

#voltron legendary defender #fic rec #weekly voltron fic recs #vldgen

75 notes · View notes

monkey-network · 7 years ago

Text

Good Stuff - THE (FULL) TROOF ABOUT STEVEN UNIVERSE

WARNING: What you’ll see under the cut is possibly one of the grandest things I will ever do and generally one of the biggest SU Crit posts of all time. Be advised that explicit language is present and we ask that readers are open-minded and reasonable with any given retort. Note that this has been edited due to Tumblr’s limitations of presentable media so click here for the Director’s Cut.

Do like & share if you enjoyed it or if I fought your boredom. Thank you and take care out there.

Steven Universe is a charming, popular show with a quad-polar fandom, and I’m only here to point out what I say is legitimately wrong with this cartoon. Simple enough? Fair enough.

POINT #1 - THE ACTION:

Okay, my first point really doesn’t just apply with cartoons, but fights in general. Question: what’s the one thing that people get the most out of seeing a fight? The impacts. Those moments where the opponent is given such a crushing ass blow, that you can feel the effort that went into that attack. Yeah, Steven Universe lacks this. I mean, it can look like the characters are putting effort into fighting their opponents and it can look like they’re getting hurt pretty bad (thanks to applied visuals and sound effects), but it never feels like the characters are actually hitting each other. There are instances of impact, but they’re menial and they’re scattered between the duelists smacking each other like helium filled action figures; feeling as tender as any other motion the characters do throughout. Now if you’re wondering what I mean by impacts, note these prime examples; because animes know their action.

Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure

Hajime no Ippo

Summer Wars

My Hero Academia

If present, violence can/should provide a stark raving contrast to the supposedly grounded world in any series, and the impacts of violence should be escalating with every punch or kick. Attacks should fly with fierce swiftness, the weight/force of any blow can be seen; raw power, speed, and stamina should be pushed to limits unknown. Now, I’m not saying Steven U has to imitate any incredible, well animated fight scene that anime has flawlessly provided by now, but more effort should have been made to escalate the impact of their fights, not keep it steady tuned with

*Smear work to make the boring motions look fast paced

*Spiky white marks to show a clash

*quick visual instances of impact that lets you know a character is getting hurt

*and tons of smoke to cover the possibly graphic imagery

Steven Universe has the fundamentals of action down, but they don’t go beyond that (plus ultra). Their fights can look technically similar with the characters being the only real source of variation, especially when you can figure out their attacks ahead of time. So I hate to say this, but if you’ve seen one fight, you’ve seen ‘em all.

Another reason I presented Steven U’s lacking action is because tts not just about fists flying or weapons clashing, but the balance of emotion that goes with the foes putting their heart and soul into taking each other down. But, for most of the time, I don’t see SU’s fights present any real hook of seriousness, even if it wants me to, and most of them feel present for (basic) comedy. I feel less invested in who’s fighting, or why, than I am at how they’re getting beat up. Ironic, being a show that’s all about being open with its “serious” emotions. Combined with its lackluster animation, and they don’t add much contrast towards an otherwise easy going series

This here is honestly the most funniest a fight scene of theirs can get (mostly ‘cuz Peri deserved that), but after seeing the pretty slow animation, it can lose its luster no matter how deserving it may seem. Now notice this whopping scene, from the anime One Punch Man, below.

You can know nothing about One Punch Man, who these characters really are, but you can tell from these 5 seconds alone that when a fight happens, there’s a fast, over the top sense of comedy that comes with the brutal nature of a man that can apparently KO anybody in one swing, ironic and even more comedic with said one hit wonder being the most emotionless looking character on the show.

Seriously, that’s his face for almost the whole series

Now I know what you’re thinking, “But Monkey Network, it’s mostly a slice of life cartoon. The action scenes aren’t that prominent in the series as you might think and hope. It’s not supposed to be a violent show.” And I’d say fair point except for the fact that Friendship is Magic is also a slice of life cartoon that only has a few real action scenes under its belt, and this particular one is the best fucking thing I’ll ever see.

youtube

AGAIN, you can know nothing about the series as a whole, or this episode in general, but this fight alone perfectly captures the game Steven Universe has never really utilized since its early days. It has some seriousness with its escalating over the top attacks, the pace never feels constant, and even though they’re evenly matched, the things they do look fucking cool. The only downside is that since the show has puppet flash animation, it does looks limited, but even then they made the most of it. Steven Universe is hand drawn, so with all due respect, they have no fucking excuse. Their fight scenes amount to stay the course animation with glimpses of impact and a flashy style to avoid it from being pod racing levels of BORING. I’ve seen fan animations that would give this show a run for its money.

The Fandom provides more than the actual show

Even before Garnet’s fight with Jasper, Steven Universe’s action sequences was a sweet chunk of what made the show investing to watch, and looking at back at it, I was a bit too invested in something that wasn’t that invested in itself. Again, I know it can’t stack up to the God tier works that the anime world’s made for itself, but compared to other action present cartoons (Voltron, Star vs. the Forces of Evil, Avatar, The Powerpuff Girls, MLP, OK KO, any shonen anime), I think maybe they could/should git a little gooder in providing actual fights, not sparring matches. That, and if Sugar Honey Ice Tea and her crewniverse can put such effort into the facial expressions, they can make the fights more expressive too.

POINT #2 - THE “VILLAINS”:

Now, I fucking love villains. Not just for the who, but why and how they do it. When bad guys like the Joker, Lord Dominator, DIO, or Him do their thing onscreen, I enjoy every moment of their threatening essence (except Jared Leto’s Joker, he sucked). Villains remorselessly do unethical, downright vicious, things to fulfill their goals while initiating setting up the heroes to correct these effects with their efforts and abilities. Steven Universe has villains, sure. Yet, after having so many chances, Rebecca Sugardaddy has failed to make them REAL villains, specifically the Great Diamond Authority.

Now originally, I was gonna compare the Diamonds to the likes of Fire Lord Ozai(Avatar: The Last Airbender) or DIO (JJBA); villains that work in the shadows and when they’re eventually revealed, they’re already a force to be reckoned with. But looking into how they and Homeworld is set up, there was no other villainous ensemble that could stack up with the Diamonds perfectly like the Gorosei from the anime One Piece.

Looking more badass than the US Government

Now these five gentlemen aren’t necessarily what make up the end all be all for the series, but above all, the Gorosei are the ruling leaders of the organization that controls the entire world of One Piece. They command the military, the police, and other agencies, like their investigative and espionage departments, and the only people that out rule these gentlemen are the descendants of those who created it several centuries ago. Like the Diamonds, they seek to maintain order and justice for the people of their world and doing so means taking on any sign of revolution (namely Pirates) that could damage not only their image, but their purpose. Both Authorities possess absolute rule over the many classes that are under them and their stance of power can be present with the many actions that effect the characters we focus on currently. The difference between the two ruling classes is nuance, aka a grey sense of morality, aka an actual sense of relatability. So when I see a series having an overall narrative villain, Steven Universe has shown me that sympathy should NOT be a factor in storytelling.

Now when I say this, I don’t mean you can’t sympathize with any villain you see. Most of the time, you can feel for the antagonist when their lives never were good to begin with, that’s namely how villainy starts out, therefore making their actions not so much justified, but understandable. Take the rogues gallery that are the enemies of Batman.

Every one of them has a story to tell and a method to their madness. Their histories weren’t as nice or as hopeful as they may have hoped, and you can feel their pain as their efforts to be successful at something grand falls apart due to the Dark Knight or life’s unforgiving nature. However, the sympathy stops there because none of these masterminds, with the Joker being an exception, serve as a main villain to Batman’s crusade for justice, they’re continuous rivals and one off stories that expand the DC Universe. No evil in Gotham is powerful enough because Batman’s story has no real endgame. Steven Universe and One Piece will eventually have an endgame. And while the Gorosei represent an Oligarchical commodity that separates its order seeking rule from their affiliating countries, The Diamonds have amounted to being under one system alone:

Or generally cruel Collectivism if you wanna sound smart

And it’s weird I bring this up. For I would’ve thought to have called Homeworld an authoritative caste system where the gem you’re born with defines your class and status, coinciding with the gems’ natural abilities. The specific gems are given a role and everyone plays a part to maintain societal order, like what India has, with the Diamonds being the biggest and strongest gems and therefore are the de facto Matriarch of the gem society, you feel me? That would’ve earned a little sympathy from me, because the Diamonds losing Pink would’ve meant the massive changes to accommodate their order and resources might not have worked out so well and their image as leaders are slowly diminishing and that can explain the huge resentment for Earth and Rose’s Rebellion.

But no. Instead the Diamonds are a repressive totalitarian government that basically control everyone and everything, all the gems below to strictly follow and almost never question their line of reasoning, and they’re reasons for destroying the Earth has been summarized down to the emotional baggage and grudge that came with their failure long ago.

CAN YOU NOT FEEL THEIR STRUGGLE?!

Wanna know why I didn’t compare the Diamonds to Avatar’s Fire Nation when talking about humanizing the enemy and the connection couldn’t be more obvious? Because before Ozai is ever mentioned, The Last Airbender states very clearly that the Fire Nation is the region Aang and his friends need to infiltrate to stop their manifest destiny. And when we’re early hinted that Zuko’s not full on evil, it lets the audience know that not everyone is on board with those in charge of the Fire Nation invasion, leading up to Ozai’s big debut where we see that as the endgame villain, he’s irredeemable and has such a lust for power, that he’s recognizably the main drive everyone has to stop. Avatar did this right because little by little, the main enemy was narrowed down to a single force that hasn’t made itself known until near the end when his presence bear more importance. The same can’t be said for Steven Universe because Rebecca Sugar Rush presented yet another faint mistake.

The Diamond’s personalities are given to us before they’ve shown us who they are and what they’re capable of…

So we see Yellow Diamond as a vindictive, no nonsense leader that wants shit to get done and Blue Diamond as a more tender looking, yet no nonsense leader that’s grieving over Pink Diamond’s death and does whatever she can to move on and remember the fallen fondly. So, have they done anything before we’ve met them personally? Sure.

*They corrupted thousands of their own kind (because of the rebellion)

*Allowed experimentation towards shattered gems to make artificial fusion or disembodied amalgamates (because of the rebellion)

*And let’s not forget the Cluster (because of the rebellion)

So yeah, quite a lot actually. Now you might be thinking, “But Monkey Network, what does those five old men have to do with what the Diamonds did?” Well, when you see the villainous shit the Gorosei have commanded, their actions are actually more relatable than one would expect.

*Ordering the destruction of an island of archaeologists because they were secretly researching forbidden history

*Ordered death to any pregnant woman in sight fearing that one could be pregnant with Gol D. Roger, the OG Pirate King’s, child. Said slaughter lasted for around two years (Special thanks to @des-the-girl for this info)

*Directing the Marines, or the front line enemies of our Pirate heroes

*And contemplating their system’s next move when updates arrive

Now I don’t know about you, but these gentlemen make up quite an authoritative class with understandable motives and relatable notions on running the world without necessarily being on the front lines. Kinda like the US over the years? Even when their level of corruption can be on par and we still know little of their true power and who they really are, they’re instantly better than the Diamond Authority because we can see why they’re in command, their thoughts and actions towards our heroes shows no sign of being sympathetic, and yet we see where their motives lie. I mean, their Government’s enemies are pirates. You know, Pirates? People who’ve robbed and killed and are the opposite of order? See where I’m going here? They namely go after our heroes who are seen to be the enemy even when the Pirates and plenty others consider them the enemy. It’s almost as if there’s a grey choice for the audience to wonder whom the real bad guys are. OooooOOh. Also, quick side note. The Gorosei look fucking cool. Like their designs aren’t exactly human, credit towards Eiichiro Oda and his expressive designs, but they’re drawn with such a level of seriousness and stature that it presents their elder wisdom and grave subtlety towards a subject in a contrasting light to the pirates bombastic, emotional appeal.

So, what’s the tl;dr aspect of this since you probably won’t take this seriously? Well, call this a domino effect. Basically, Rebecca Sugardop has given us nonthreatening villains that showed no sign of any redeemable qualities beyond their ability to mesmerize us with their acting, and the audience should have a bit of sympathy for their side (see ”Bismuth”). In doing so, she failed to make them real villains. In doing that, there really are no real villains in the show. And when there are no villains, the conflict feels dry and absent. And without conflict, she failed at putting together HALF an overall story. And when you’re a coming of age story where it has to end on some note with maturity and change, after almost five years in the making, you just FUCKED yourself over when you didn’t even invest time in HALF of what makes an overall story of good and evil investing and engaging. Oh I’m sorry, what makes an overall story of a blurred line between good and evil. Investing and engaging.

Ugh, I can’t care anymore. If they get redeemed, sure. If they end up dying like a tragedy, fine. They feel less like villains to overcome and more like stairs Steven has to step on to become a better person. Just let White Diamond be as grandiose and badass as Tumblr’s AUs of her, because again…

The fandom is doing the show a bit of justice

POINT #3 - BEACH CITY:

Okay, before I provide attention to our main gem heroes, I thought I’d give their home of Beach City a vocal point to express the diversity they offer and what makes them an essential drive for Steven and the Crystal Gems to protect the Earth by any means. I mean, they offer such valid representation for the show’s world building and can offer plenty of stories to tell to give us that slice of lifevibe the show really needed. But I believe, after seeing Beach City time and time again over the course of 4 years, that I can summate its presence in the show with a single- Nay. With two simple yet comprehensible words.

Who cares?

Whooo CARES?

youtube

Thank you, respectable actor Elaine Stritch. Rest in Peace

To continue, don’t get me wrong. Worldbuilding is more than essential for a story like Steven Universe, Berserk, Friendship is Magic, Legend of Zelda, and so on. Whether big or small, expanding a setting is important to giving characters a versatile way to look at their world in a differing light than before. But suffice to say, what world has Steven Universe built for itself?

*A populated province in the East Coast?

*A barn?

*Ancient ruins? Among other distant gem territory?

Aye, this troof is gonna be hard to explain. We just have locations, people. That’s it. They’re no special than the mini Galaxies from Super Mario Galaxy 2, only on Wii, Rated E for Everyone. A place can look cool and a population there can bring life to it, but they should have something for the characters to interact with and visibly wonder about what they might get into as they adapt and progress in some way. And by some way, I don’t mean insert plot devices that help make the characters do significant looking things, and I’ll get to that a bit later. But to sum it up, Steven Universe present locations, but those locations lack identity and coordination.

Stick around, Link, I might need your example

I got a short story to tell. True story. And this story provides my reason, above all else, for why Beach City doesn’t hold much water anymore when talking about world building, specifically after the show’s first season (or Full Disclosure).

There’s a comic book TV show called Preacher, premieres Mondays @ 9, only on AMC. Essentially it’s about a criminal turned Priest, possessed with a supernatural power, going on a cross country road trip to find the physical form of God with his his mate who’s also a vampire and his ex-girlfriend. Pretty vivid premise, but see for yourself. The first season however sets up the road trip where the priest, his ex, and vampire friend stay in a small town in Texas to not only introduce them, the power that the priest gets, and the type of humor throughout, but flesh out a few citizens they encounter pretty well in a thematically connected turnabout for ten episodes straight. All seems good.

Up until the entire town loses their minds, after losing all faith in belief, which eventually leads to a methane nuclear sized explosion that wipes out everybody except the three main characters who exited a few scenes before.

The End.

Now, let’s talk relevance. If I ran Steven Universe, and I don’t think I can, and I pulled 👆👆 that on Beach City at season 1′s end. Erase everything you’ve seen, every citizen will be forced to disappear except the major plot oriented characters, basically resetting the structure. If I did that, how much would it change? What would we really lose? The diverse Beach citizens that don’t and can’t do shit against the enemies we’ve see unless they’re forced to get involved in some way which rarely happens?

You can put as many people of color and as many personalities in your world all you want, but effort should also be put into not just making them NPC levels of value to the point where a reset button wouldn’t put much a dent to the “world building”. The worst part is that it’s not like Batman’s Gotham City or Spider-Man’s New York; places where the villains are plotting while they’re within city walls. Steven Universe’s enemies have to either be brought out somewhere (gem monsters, Lapis) or brought to (Jasper, that red Eye, Aqua and Topaz) Beach City for the place to provide any significant or value. So…

Just saying.

Now if the whole series was like season one with the non “To Be Continued”slice of life episodes, then it would’ve work. Phineas and Ferb, Foster’s Home, and Friendship is Magic has done this well with keeping their main location (The Foster House, Danville, Ponyville, etc.) as their central hubworld for casual stories with a venture outside of them from time to time. I would’ve been okay with Beach City being the spot for Steven and his limitless squad to grow together like Rebecca intended at first. Then I’m reminded that there’s an world expanding story in this, with bigger consequences and threaded arcs, and I’m stuck between investing in the many things they give me, complaining towards full episodes that add up to nothing and went nowhere special, and whining about the lack of reruns it gets on TV compared to Teen Titans GO.

Bottom line, you had/have your comic series to commit to your slice of life genre instead of trying to keep it in the show.

Now, I’m at a disadvantage here. If I want to talk about the actual “SCIENCE FANTASY WORLD BUILDING”, then I’ll have to talk about the Crystal Gems’ involvement in them and I can’t really do that. Luckily, I don’t have to, for SU has unintentionally played itself: when it comes to the Gem oriented locations outside Beach City, they tell but never really show. And turns out I don’t need Link’s example, but Samus Aran’s. Namely, her universe in the Metroid Prime series.

A key element to world building is the control and fun in exploration where you find and somewhat interact with aspects of an environment’s purpose and history while you’re on the go, giving the place more of an identity. Metroid Prime does this well where you journey through different parts of the Galaxy and with your scan visor, you can catalog and figure out the intricacies of the settings, the enemies within them, and info that seem trivial at first, but can offer much in progressing ahead in the game. Note the example before you…

And don’t stare deep into Samus’s blue eyes

Sure it’s an optional part of the game, and you can still trek on with or without having to continuously research the world’s lore, but it offers that versatility where you’re well in control in how to experience the game. Then again, this is a video game, where your skill in figuring things out is the only way to progress anything. What cartoon has this similar level of versatility? I mean, what else?

What else?

Gravity Falls may have stayed in one place, but it gives the characters and audience so much to explore and theorize on. They don’t tackle “everything” the world might have offered (bigfoot), but still give you so much to look out for without ever holding your hand or giving a cliffnotes version on a mystery of theirs. Hell, the fandom was hollering on Tumblr over predicting one of the show’s biggest mysteries being confirmed long before it aired. Hirsh didn’t just give those theory nuts what they wanted, his crew eased us in on how the narrative is taking a turn to someplace different and new without really forcing it on everybody. There was still that enjoyable sense of control that resonated in both the show’s direction and the audience’s experience.

I mean come on, this just oozes the moment of truth

Don’t get me wrong. The crewniverse offer very interesting locations and things that resonate with Gem stuff. My final problem with this is that when I think they might utilize these different places and things, they hold back to sharing but a glimpse of anything the show has plenty of utilizing potential for. Like…

Could this control room present more information about Homeworld’s plans for the gems than just the Cluster? “Probably not, it fulfilled its purpose. Let’s move on.”

What about these drills? Could we personally see how one works, like accidentally reactivate it to see how it functions? “Nah, they’re all dead. Let’s move on.”

Or what about the holes? Could we have some kind of flashback depicting how a gem leaps out the ground? “Nope.” Not even the off col- “NOPE.”

What’s that supposed to be? Is it something important to Homeworld? “We’ll get to that later. Let’s move on.”

Man, this place looks cool. Connie might consider this since she handles weapons and might want something new, like armor or throwing weapons. “Look man, this tour is scheduled. You’ve seen it, we’ll get back to it later. Moving right along.” This tour sucks. “You paid for it, my friend.”

Egoraptor said it best: I’m not witnessing an adventure, I’m a guest at their theme park. This is Kingdom Hearts levels of dragging it along, and I know… “But Monkey Network, they might come back to all that stuff soon. It’s called foreshadowing, you whiner.” To that, I say HA! There’s a huge difference between foreshadowing and giving us cameos. And that is in...

PRESENTATION!

Long story short, if it’s subtle and holds a threatening or vague presence, THAT’s foreshadowing. If it’s already out in the open and is not given a lot of screentime or detail, that’s cameo-ing and waiting for more. The last thing a show should do is hold back and have its audience wait like shoving a secret box in our face, and that’s all Steven Universe has been doing. That’s why so many rant about what’s filler or not. That’s why so many theorize on the most reaching of details. That’s why people proudly growl at what could be the crew’s simple decisions. Because when everything must come back to Beach City, post “Full Disclosure”, exploration can be limited, detail can be limited, and it’ll be up to the audience to speculate/construct the world-building for themselves, making the control and experience for the show feel one sided, therefore UNFAIR.

Like I said, the things I’ve seen offer so much to think about, but Rebecca Sugar sack could’ve done better with presenting them in a better light than a dim mode. The fate of Steven Universe’s future is a mystery to me, and I don’t know what they’re gonna cram in season 5 this fall. All I know is MJ (or Mystery Girl) is fine as fuck and we’re all gonna get something good eventually. My man Ian Jones-Quartey said good world building takes time, and they sure are taking their time.

POINT #4 - THE REPRESENTATION:

Representation in media can be easy when the right writers are at the helm to present (not push) a message of acceptance and acknowledgement towards an audience that may or may not feel the same way. It takes different strokes to rule the world, after all. However, when it comes to character in general, there are two factors in characterization that when used correctly can appeal their message of acceptance for their audience. One, visual acknowledgement of the representing characters (POC, LGBT, belief, etc.) in question and two, giving the subjects good quality participation to show that they are just as adept to the world as any other without phoning in the fact that they are this or that. Long story short, make ‘em good characters and the representation can earn the audience’s respect for itself. Steven U lacks this too, and this comes from them often showing us stuff and expecting us to just go with it, with themes that are enough just to get by fans. Hell, they show us as much as a drive by…

Not even a cool one at that, fresh

I’ll say this to start off: Lars Barriga (my neega) was a stagnant and frustrating character to deal with; nobody in Beach City moved him in any way (not even his own supporting parents), and the writers just shotgunned him growth (more than once) after he basically had to cheat death (more than once) to gain a better conscience. It’s like they wanted to call him a lost cause but had to hook him back in some way for the audience to not deem him a lost cause. So with all due respect, does it matter that he’s Filipino or a trans boy when nothing valuable or thoughtful has come from him especially? Those trivial tidbits can mostly come off as add ons or secondary nods, when they should’ve been welcomed knowledge about his character. Want an good example? Look to the comic series Lumberjanes, especially issues 14-17 and 28. SPOILERS, though…

They did this right for characters Jo and Barney (Jo’s the one in the 2nd panel, Barney’s in the first). They already established these two as well defined characters that make mistakes but are willing to get shit done for their friends by any means. The dialogue above is when Barney is thinking about joining the girl oriented scouts even when he’s considered a boy scout, wondering where does he want to belong. Jo gives him reassurance that she herself felt the same and just wants Barney to assert himself with what he wants to be like she did. And when he does later on, he’s accepted without any forced gratification and the writers gracefully accommodate this to not only make him (now “them”) a good addition to the story’s world, but a welcoming new perspective.

The representation is therefore earned, not just shown off

Now I’d talk further on other characters like Lars, but that would be singing the same beats as my previous piece on world building and would spoil notes on the final 2 parts I’m working on now. Instead, the gems are another reason why the rep-pres-sen-tation in SU is nothing but small fractured penny in the gold mine that is anything else going on, with fusion diminishing the relationship representation of Steven U; however you may see it. Now excuse me… this is the hardest part of my job.

Criticizing love

Garnet is not a good embodiment of Ruby and Sapphire’s love; Ruby and Sapphire is. I would love to see Ruby and Sapphire being together and showing me why they decided to elope, but I can’t because Garnet is a curtain that metaphorically and literally covers said love from having anything more to say than “HELL YEAH WE LOVE EACH OTHER!”. You could say ‘Keystone Motel’offered some adversity for the two, but knowing Steven U, it didn’t feel like much beyond me knowing they’re getting back together in the end because they love each other and they just go back to being Garnet because she’s the personification of their love and such.

Fusion is something I have a disdain for now because they’re exchanging two characters’ development of united growth for basically an entirely new/different character, that don’t have much screen time or development anyways (vice versa in Flourite’s case). You could say ‘Know your Fusion’ presented an evolution for Smokey Quartz, among the other known fusions, to being more than a versatile fighter, but not really no. We were already aware that Steven and Amethyst were acknowledged sad sacks before they fused, so what else does this fusion offer differently than in their ability? As for Sardonyx, she hasn’t changed from her first cameo awhile back and her vanity was the only thing that made her stand out in said episode. All in all, fusion doesn’t reflect a relationship, no matter how hard Rebecca Suge Knight is saying otherwise, it reflects an aftermath; one that’s in and out as a firework. This and up ‘til now, the real couples we see are pretty general or under the rug. To show how the most mentioned and presented couple in the series, RubyXSapphire, has continuously got the shaft, I present the one dynamic you’d least expect: A boy and his stuffed toy.

My personally favorite example so far.

Calvin and Hobbes is a series about boy Calvin and his stuffed tiger Hobbes that comes to life through Calvin’s imagination. Reality is like Garnet in this case, where it’s just Calvin having his stuffed animal around to get into zany hijinks like any other kid his age. Then again, the imagination or the living Hobbes is whom is given more of a focus, allowing their dynamic to bloom in a way that wouldn’t be understood if we just saw Calvin just talking to his toy the whole time. It makes their bond feel real and that’s what RubyxSapphire should be, giving them the floor in a way that adds up to Garnet’s eventual debut. “But Monkey Network, what about ‘The Answer’?” The Answer is an episode that, while sweet and good looking, literally danced over much necessary development in favor of only showing us how they eventually stuck to being Garnet forever. Not saying Garnet doesn’t have any character herself, but her integral backstory was/is one of the most beloved and talked about in terms of relationships, yet little has actually been given to us beyond face value and basic understanding and the writers have generally avoid pressing this any further. In a way, that episode diminishes the representation of real queer relationships, bogging it down to early Disney romances like Snow White’s, and practically blindfolds us about what we want to see vs what we should be seeing.

And I already got cute girls not kissing last year. It’s the current fucking year

I would talk about all the other canonning “ships” but nothing comes to mind other than the gems are getting along better than before, Mystery Girl is still fine as fuck, Steven and Connie are bound to elope since it’s been presented since the beginning, Lapis and Peridot get along as college roommates, Lapis might still have issues after Malachite happened, Jasper regrets nothing, Topaz sounds cool from the little we got of them, and everything has amounts to having a sob story and/or a recollection of thoughts just to say “Hey, we’re good together”. They implicitly share infatuation and good vibes to each other, but nothing to say their themes of LGBT, relationships, and characterization are groundbreaking. The latter I’ll get to next time. I mean anybody can put effort into writing a genuine romance novel, though it takes more effort to push the romance to challenging means without leaving skeptics at the door, something Sugar has been very casual about and is starting to openly show in the show. That and tears. Because you know what they say, open emotions are better than emotional maturity. Isn’t that right, TV?

Don’t get me wrong. Rebecca Sugarbark is out here doing her darndest as…

CARTOON. NETWORK’S. FIRST. FEMALE. ANIMATED. SERIES. CREATOR!

and when she does themes right, the show provides some good things to think about. But when she muddles them up or casually throws them in, especially when these themes come from the different aspects of what makes a person different yet real, it is unforgivable. And when people of all ages are watching this, thinking with their living ideologies about what could be used to think differently? This makes for a very risky tightrope that can lead to either people taking it appropriately or blindly, good and bad alike. I can only hope that as the show goes on, there are less assumptions and implications from both the show and the audience alike and more assertions and certainty that elements like representation of any kind are brought to a more applied approach than a glanced approach.

AND STEVEN - POINT #5:

What makes a great character? Charm? Growth? Badassery? Nah, it’s the struggle son. To cheaply quote Pixar: “You admire a character more for trying more than for their successes.” And while Steven does try, does he really fail? Let’s look back. He has three skillful and powerful guardians that care for him. He has a father who is filthy rich (’member that). He has a sweet ass pad. Everyone that knows him likes/respects him. He has powers retained from his mother. He has a lion for a pet. He redeemed/helped three of what were once his enemies. He has a best friend that joins in the action with a sword. He clearly has the capable knowledge of reaching out to anyone. He’s outdone death more than once. He’s practically invulnerable (see “Steven vs. Amethyst”). Everyone that doesn’t like him could eventually see his way with good convincing and a middle road to come to (except Kevin). While there are things he needs to do and characters that’ll he have to confront sooner or later, I’ve started to think less of how he’ll succeed and more of when he’ll succeed. I’m thinking less of who he is and more of what he is. Here’s what I mean…

I don’t see Star Butterfly as an upbeat, independent, cocky, and enduring magical princess who loves rainbows and puppies and struggles to balance fun, romance, and responsibility in one go. I see an up and coming teenage princess that’ll defeat all the evil, hook up with her friend Marco, and claim the title of Mewni’s Queen while doing it all her way.

And I don’t see the JoJo bloodline as a group of distinct protagonists that have their own goals and passions all the while seeking justice against the evil that surrounds them. I see the main characters of 8 different parts that have the ability to defeat the final enemy at the end.

It’s the “Man of Steel” effect; when you do nothing but show how Steven is becoming like or better than Rose, it takes away from letting Steven see who he really is and wants to be. Season one did Steven good (begrudging to say, I know) where he was devious, self-centered, and oblivious but basically was a goofball kid with a good heart; like Ash Williams from Evil Dead. Halfway in and they basically took that away in favor of him just being the pacifistic hippie boy scout that doesn’t want to do wrong or hurt anybody and wants to be a better version of his mama and… and…zzzzzzz. Yeah, I don’t know how to put this, but Steven is now as good of a main character as a sheet of paper. Like, on paper he had potential, but as paper he’s pretty ineffective.

Hell, even paper can show you wonders

“But Monkey Network, he’s a character that goes through many hardships and has a lot on his mind and is going through plenty like most people.” Yes he is, but he’s really done nothing to better himself. “Mindful Education” brings this up, but immediately sweeps it clean in favor of a song about trauma (ironic) and giving Connie more of the floor. And “Storm in the Room” perfectly captures how flat his guilt complex really is…

This episode could’ve given Steven a better perspective on what he wants to be, how he should see Rose, and how things in his life will change from that point on. No, it amounted to saying Rose wasn’t in the wrong for anything (clearly a lie) and Steven being basically gaslighted to believe that he’ll be around to fix what she didn’t do herself, never stating how he should go about doing so. He has guilt and unsure regrets, and yet now nothing feels like things for him are getting any better through his efforts. Knowing that he’s basically Jesus, I am stunned I don’t see him curing every ill-ridden human on the planet and is instead trying to make peace with everything that wants him dead. Also, if I wanted a show that mirrors the possible regret and turmoil I force myself to suffer with everyday, weed and a literal mirror would create a similar effect. And all this leads to–

“But Monkey Network, he’s at least a pacifist who tries. He only wants to share peace and enlightenment to everyone he meets and that includes those who are trying to defeat them.” True, but there is something called “being pushed to a limit”. Yeah I see Steven stand up for himself while choosing not to hit anybody, but there are some people that don’t deserve anything but a good blow to the face. We see Steven get angry and mean, but has he really been pushed to a limit?

youtube

Mob Psycho 100 (Ep. 3) A limit that, while possessing regretting, let’s one know they can be a force to be reckoned with?

youtube

Trigun: Badlands Rumble A limit that forces them to take immense action without breaking their code of pacifistic honor?

I mean there’s being a pacifist, and there’s being an peaceful spouting wimp I can whup easily before somebody beats me up to stop it. The point of having pacifism in a show is the counterpoint where that ideology’s being tested and momentous reactions result from it. Yeah, he showed sheer ire towards Kevin in that one episode but that was it, and that was a one off excursion with the only irredeemable character in the series. Now I know violence is not always the answer and this isn’t suppose to be a violent show, whatever, but violence is present more than enough times in this show. So I must topically ask, what was stopping Steven from five knuckle shuffling Aquamarine when he clearly had the chance to, freeing his friends and getting the chance to escape their clutches? There’s the peaceful route, and there’s showing us nothing.

Boy must have a weak ass jab

“But Monkey Network, he has development and growth with this being a coming-of-age story.” True dat, but to an extent. I’ve noticed that when it comes to Steven Universe’s development, everyone is given development with Steven tagging behind. Connie, Amethyst, Pearl, Peridot, Lapis, Lars, you see them learning and growing on the front lines, but Steven’s been kinda consistent wouldn’t you say? I mean, he does grow in seeing many different perspectives, but does he really grow with the said varied perspectives or does he just acknowledge them while doing his usual helping routine to try making things better? You know who is a better main character than Steven? Well….

You could get with this^Or you could get with thatv

Wouldn’t you agree? They’re forced to look out of their comfort zone, they make mistakes but see to getting back up, they grow to understand how this new world works and take it to heart, they’re not mopey little shits and constantly take initiative, still having a lot to learn, and I find their voices less annoying than Steven’s. Okay, that last part is a preference but still.

I’ll say Steven’s a fine protagonist, but he’s a boring protagonist to sum it up. Nothing about him makes me want to care anymore and while I look towards new episodes, all I can do now is tolerate him. They could do better with season 5 upping the ante, but at this point I’m more invested in the world of Steven Universe than Steven himself, and that is sad. You know your cartoon is crumbling where your world generally revolves around the main character and said MAIN CHARACTER is whack! Rebecca Sugar Schnapps and her crew just better git good this season; because it can look good and sound good as long as it wants, but it needs to feel good to be a real show, you feel me?

And that’s my Troof. The whole and nothing but. Thank you <3 Roy M.

#steven universe #su #su critical #su criticism #su critique #SU Crit #anime #cartoons #analysis #reviews #long post #the full shebang #Roy Macintosh #Good Stuff #ye #awesome

48 notes · View notes