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uhgoodmoni · 4 years ago

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Nothing That Lasts Forever

A BTS fanfiction

Trailer - ch1 - ch2 - ch3 - ch4- ch5 - ch6 - ch7 - ch8 - ch9

Ao3 link - Wattpad link - Soundtrack

Warnings: Major Character Death, Blood, Demons, Fighting, Verbal and Physical Abuse, Mention of marijuana, Death, Cursing, Fire, Unintentional Self-harm, Gore. Yoongi’s injury

Chapter One: Otsukare

Yoongi’s POV

I glance down at my phone, a new text from Hoba. ‘5 mins away :p’. I don’t bother responding but instead, give Jungkook a slight shove. His shoulder is digging into mine, dozing off on the couch. Drool comes from his lips to the cushion, luckily not my shirt sleeve. He barely lifts his head as I stand up, heading to the table where our things are packed. I roll my eyes looking over him slumped on the couch. I get it, I’m tired too, but he can rest in the car.

“Hoseok will be here soon, you better not forget anything,” I lecture, and he nods his head. He isn’t listening and I know it. I shake my head, double-checking my bag for my charger. I don’t want to forget it, even if I won’t be on my phone that often. Hobi’s charger has been lost and there wasn’t time to get a new one so he’ll want to borrow one of ours on the trip. I glance at my phone, at full charge and it will probably stay that way.

“No no, I won’t,” he mumbles, groggy still. It is gonna be a long drive, so we had woken early, he’ll likely claim the back seat to crash in. I pout, knowing I won’t be able to rest my eyes. It’s better to drive with an extra pair of eyes on the road. I’m glad that Hoseok volunteered to drive in the first place. Jungkook had agreed to drive on the way home so maybe I can nap in the backseat then.

“Your charger?” I ask, grabbing the bag of food and placing it on the counter. Chips, bread, some soda, mostly sweets but Hobi is bringing the cooler with our sandwich makings.

“Yeah it’s in there,” he mostly whispers. I shrug, won’t be my problem if he hasn’t packed it. He just won’t have a phone, no biggie since we are meant to be on holiday. Slinging the bag over my shoulder I take up my suitcase, heading to the door.

“Come on, why don’t you help me bring some stuff outside so we can just stick it in the trunk and go.” He gives a short hum as I head out. Whatever, I’ll just make him unpack everything when we get to the cabin. The door slams behind me as I walk down to the elevator. It takes me slowly to the lobby, but I head out the back where I know Hobi would be parking. The air is chill against my cheeks as I push myself out the door. The summer is just at its tail end, making the mornings and evenings quite chilly. Looking around for his car I hug my bag tighter. Hopefully, the weather will warm up for our trip.

His car pulls in, stopping in the spot ahead of me. As he exits the vehicle, the trunk opens up. Stuffed inside is the cooler and his suitcase.

“Hi hi hiii,” He cheers, a huge grin spread across his face. He jogs over to me, taking the bag of food from my hands. “It’s a good day aye?” He hums, walking me back over to the car.

“Yeah,” I grin, pulling up the suitcase into the trunk beside his, giving it a push to leave room for Jungkook’s. “Hoping for nicer weather.” I nod up to the cloudy sky, a blinding white, but the sun is still hiding.

“When we get there it’ll get warmer,” He assures, dropping the bag in, and pulling me in for a hug. “Where’s Jungkook?” He says, releasing me and shutting the trunk.

“He probably fell back asleep upstairs,” I sigh as Hoseok leads the way back inside shrugging.

With a cheeky smirk, he hops inside the elevator, “Can’t lie I almost fell asleep on the road.” And with my silence, he gives a chuckle.

My elbow finds his side, “Hey drink some coffee next time.” I sigh, “Oh, and don’t text and drive either.” I scold, crossing my arms. He makes a pop with his mouth ignoring what I said. “I’m being serious you could get killed,” I mutter as we walk into the hall back towards the room.

“You’re right, I won't anymore.” He smiles, opening the door for me. I take a step in, Jungkook looming right over me. I bump into his bag just as he is coming out the door.

“Ohp sorry Yoongi hyungie.” He laughs, eyes slightly swollen, but awake nevertheless, hair draped over his cheeks.

“You left nothing behind right?”

“Nope,” He shakes his head, “stop worrying so we can have fun,” He huffs. He’s lucky I know he’s teasing.

“So we are ready to get on the road?” Hobi asks, leading the way back to the elevator. “Good Morning Jungkookie.” they squish right into a hug. “Are you excited?” Jungkook hums an answer, stepping in after him.

“Where is it exactly that we are going anyway?” He questions, and I’m wondering the same thing.

“Gangwon Province, a little cabin that I rented for us in the woods,” He informs us. “I don't know, I just thought it would be nice for us three to get away for a little.” I nod, it is a good opportunity for us, this weekend we have no upcoming filmings or recordings to do. Namjoon is helping Jimin on his own solo album and Taehyung is going to be with his family. Not sure what Jin hyung’s reason for not attending is.

“Yes yes, I’m glad that collab got pushed back till next week because I really wanted to join you guys,” Jungkook says, taking the first step out of the elevator as it reaches the lobby.

I bud in, “I think it will make us think back to when we did In the Soop, don’t ya think?”

“Agreed,” Hobi starts, “I brought some canvas…”

“Hey hey!” Jin calls out, running over from the stairs. He’s still in his RJ pajamas, hair strewn and eyes half-closed. I grin watching him hobble over to us.

“Jinnie hyung?” Jungkook smiles, turning back to greet him. He must have come to say goodbye and send us off. Jin squeezes Jungkook tight, muttering goodbyes.

“You drive safe now.” He tells Hoseok after releasing him from an embrace. “I hope you all have fun together.” I smile, hugging him tightly as well. “Go fishing for me,” He beams at me, grabbing my ears.

“There aren't any fishing spots.” Hobi frowns.

“Sorry to disappoint,” I say, patting his back.

“That's the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard,” He scoffs. “Who goes camping and doesn’t fish?” His lip curls up. “Well I only came down here this early to tell you to catch me a fish but I guess I did it for nothing.”

“Pshhh,” Jungkook rolls his eyes, “Yeah right, you love us and came down to give us all kisses goodbye.”

“Okay now seriously,” he points at each of us, “be safe, I’m tired and going back to sleep, text us when you get there.”

“Yes, yes, hyung. Don’t worry, got a full tank this morning,” Hobi smiles, giving Jin’s hand a squeeze before he walks away, sending a wave as he heads to the elevator.

“Too bad he has a meeting on Saturday,” Hobi pouts, as we head out the back door once more. Jungkook squints his eyes as the cool breeze hits him. All of us rushed to get in the car and turn the heat on. I’m not so sure Hoseok is right about it warming up later.

“Don’t worry,” he says, buckling his seatbelt, me next to him in the passenger like I had figured would happen. “There is full heating and air conditioning at the cabin, so if it stays cold we can just cuddle up indoors.” He turns, facing Jungkook, backing up, and exits the lot.

“That sounds really nice,” Jungkook mutters, leaning his head now covered in his hoodie against the window. I nod with a smile, turning up Hobi’s heat in the car.

“No matter what I think this will be a healing weekend for us,” I assure, after all, we have been busy filming concepts and the new music video all week. We hadn’t gotten much time to relax but the three of us would at least be able to get some R&R together. Hobi has been especially stressed, he had a pain in his ankle and was trying to not get injured while we learned the new dance. Of course, he was still overexerting himself, but now I’m glad he’ll be able to rest.

He got on the highway, it will be about an hour drive which isn’t that bad. Maybe another thirty minutes after, to get to our campsite. If it ends up being a bust I suppose we can just go home.

Hobi had turned on the radio, humming along to what had come on. He’s been looking forward to this since he rented the cabin months ago. If I can help it this will be the best weekend ever.

It’s been a quiet drive, Jungkook slept the entire ride, but he probably needs the rest. Hobi plays Otsukare as we get off the main road. Playing it from youtube it sounds awful, but I can’t stop myself from laughing.

“Don’t, don’t.” I plead, shaking my head.

“It’s sope!” He calls, looking to me for a response. I laugh, tossing my eyes to the window. It’s too early for this. I glance at the clock, 9:15 and we haven't eaten breakfast. “We’re sope!” He continues singing.

“Okayyy, let’s go!” I mumble, crossing my arms as Hoseok breaks out into laughter. He continues singing as I hum along, embarrassed. It has been years since I heard this last. It would be fun to perform again with him. Maybe I’ll ask management.

Hoseok makes another turn, the trees taking over both sides of the road. There aren’t any other cars that turned along with us. It isn't a holiday weekend so we’ll likely be the only ones on vacation at this time. Not to mention the weather, it is the same as when we had left earlier. A white cloudy blanket over the whole sky, blocking out the sun but leaving the daylight to light the road. If you look deep into the trees though, there it would be dark. Hopefully, the cabin will be in a clearing so it will be lit up, then there would also be fewer bugs. I smirk, thinking about how Hobi will likely panic once we arrive, upon the amount of bugs. Hopefully, he brought bug spray. I made sure to have mosquito nets so there is that.

“Pay attention,” He starts again! Hopping up in his chair, still keeping his eyes on the road. I don’t respond so he continues, “Okay, let's smile. It's human relations. There are mountains too” He raises eyebrows to me, turning a dial for the volume.

“There are valleys too,” I sing quietly, licking my lips and reaching for my water.

“Well, that's just what life is” He grabs my hand, stopping me from reaching for the bottle. “But the earth rotates” He holds my hand back up to my face, making me roll my eyes.

“Your dream will surely come true.”

“You too,” Getting louder.

“Me too,” And louder, producing smiles.

“Let's do our best, thank you!” We sing together, Hobi turning off onto a dirt road, making the whole car shutter.

“Ayooo, why are you sooo loud,” Jungkook moans, pressing his hands into his eyes. “It’s so early…”

“Mhmh, not really anymore.” I turn back, patting his leg. “I’m sure we are almost there anyway. Right Hoba?” I flip back up to the front, where he is turning down the volume. Eyes confused, staring off, and slowing the car down to a crawl.

“Right,” He whispers, looking into his mirrors.

“What's wrong?” Jungkook sits up, looking outside the windows. It’s getting dark under the trees, just the light coming from in between the road shining down on us. It’s deep emerald green, glowing at the treetops from the light attempting to penetrate. At the base of the tall trees though it is hard to see through, getting darker and darker the further you try to look. There aren't any paths on either side and no turn-offs. Is Hoseok lost? I look over to him, but he just stops the car completely.

“Uh, I thought the turn was around here.” He pouts, pulling up his phone which has the GPS turned on. He sighs, “yeah see.” Flicking the phone in between Jungkook and I. There it is, the turn right in front of us. But there is no road and no sign that there ever has been.

“The internet connection must be bad out here.” Jungkook bites his inner cheek, sliding down in his seat. “What’s the road called? Or like the company for renting?”

Hoseok sets his phone in the cup holder, slowly releasing the brake and letting the car continue slowly forward. “It's just like a number marker and then we drive down further to reach a small clearing and hillside where the cabin will be.”

“What number?” I ask, sitting up in my chair.

“Mhm, 189.” He mutters, mouth screwing up. We sit in silence for a while as he drives down the road. Looking at the clock it is 9:25.

“It’s been ten minutes,” I announce, and Hobi only shakes his head. He’s getting annoyed. “Maybe we missed it?”

“We are going five miles an hour,” He huffs, squeezing the steering wheel. “Oh well, we could turn back around.” He shrugs, letting out a sigh, but I can tell he is still bothered. Must be stress weighing him down.

“Oh look!” Jungkook’s finger comes in between us, pointing forward to the right. Both our heads turn to look, but I can’t see a damn thing.

“What where?”

He scoots closer to the center seat. “There there, low to the ground!” He hops up and down, and there it is. A few inches from the ground a small yellow reflective sign marked ‘189’.

“Oh thank goodness.” Hoseok speeds up, reaching the turn-off in no time.

“Why is there just some random cabin marked ‘189’,” Jungkook complains, sorting through his things. “Where is 1-188” He huffs, making Hobi smile.

“Yeah it is kind of weird,” He responds, taking the turn. It’s a tight road, trees looming overhead and thus enclosing us in the dark. So much so that the car's headlights turn on automatically, the day becoming the evening. Here the road is even bumpier, grass grown in on the path. We all go silent, eyes training over the forest as if there is something in it. But it’s just trees.

“Hobi where the hell have you booked us?” Jungkook laughs, peering out his window with a huge grin. These kinds of things excite him, exploring and whatnot.

“You know, this is not what I was expecting. Even I have goosebumps.” Hoseok shivers. His face looks slightly disappointed. He isn’t a fan of spooky things so hopefully, the cabin is much more welcoming than the road to it.

“It’s okay, you’ve seen the pictures of the cabin and it looked nice you said.” He nods to me, trying to pick up the pace of the car. Another ten minutes later and we are still driving straight down the road. The end not in sight, nor the exit behind us either. Hobi runs a hand through his hair, his whole face dropping into a frown in that familiar disgusted look. The road is so narrow that he won’t be able to turn around, so none of us say anything and he just keeps going.

“This is really getting weird,” Hobi says, his voice shaky. “I can just back us out if you want.”

“No, no, no.” I say, “this has to be the right spot.”

“I’m sure we are almost there,” Koo adds. So he does, a sigh of relief from us all as the road begins to widen and trees begin to clear. There is a little picket sign ahead marking that there is a cabin on the left.

“Finally,” Hobi smiles, pulling around a wide circular clearing, a path to the right, and a short path leading to a small wooden cabin. He pulls around, parking the car in front of where we would be staying. Jungkook is getting giddy in the backseat, opening the door as soon as Hoseok puts us in park. I smile at Hobi who is already seeming a little more relaxed to be at our destination.

We join Jungkook outside, the air still a bit nipply. Hopefully, neither of them has forgotten to pack warmer clothing. All of us are in hoodies and sweatpants as of right now. Jungkook left his things hopping around the clearing, which at the center is a fire pit and some chairs. The fire will warm us up if we want and would shoo away the bugs. Past that is the path, looking like it would lead up to another clearing and the hills Hobi had mentioned. All around us on the other sides are just trees. Without the clearing, it would be just as dark as the road in. Later tonight we’ll probably be too nervous to go outside to even light the fire.

“Smores tomorrow?” Jungkook hums, coming back around to the trunk.

“Let’s get unpacked first and then decide what we are going to do,” I say, taking out my suitcase and the bag of food. Jungkook scoffs, taking his own suitcase along with the cooler.

“Yeah it’s too cold today, so tomorrow sounds good,” Hobi answers him. “And worst-case scenario we do it on the stove inside.”

“There’s a stove?” He asks backward, as we head over to the door.

Hobi gives a little laugh, “It’s a fully functional home. Despite what you would think driving up.” Making me smirk, “Even the door has a key code instead of physical keys.”

“Oh, so it's pretty new.” I nod, as he types in the code making it obvious for us both to see 456782. “Yeah definitely wouldn’t have guessed that.” I look back to the forest, closing in on us as we file in with our things.

“Wow!” Jungkook’s voice brings me back inside, the lights flickering on in the small living room.

“Oh yess.” I nod looking around. It’s well furnished, a couch and a tv, blankets, and pillows dotted all around the room. The kitchen to the left, all stainless steel appliances. There’s a hallway to the right, likely leading to the rooms. While it’s freezing, the thermostat is located next to us on the wall. Hobi immediately turns to it, flipping it up as much as he can shivering and exaggerating the cold.

“What a pad.” Jungkook grins, leading the way into the home. The hallway stops at a blank wall and then turns to the right and goes down, four doors, two on each side and a window at the end of the hall. “One floor?”

“One floor,” Hobi answers, turning into one of the rooms. “Oop,” He comes back out, “That's the bathroom,” he announces, heading to the next door across from him. I peer in, a double bed, looking cozy. Hobi turns back to us outside wagging his finger at us. “This one's mine!” Sticking his tongue out. We shrug, moving down to the next rooms. It isn’t fair really since Hobi had likely seen the images online.

Jungkook took the next room, it was also a double bed, and I curse myself for letting him have it. There is likely a single person bed in the last room and I just knew it. And I was right. I open the door and there it is wrapped in a pink duvet. At least it looked warm and comfy. My room looks the most updated, and their room’s looking dated.

“Aww shit.” I hear Hoseok cry, making me peek my head out into the hall. He doesn’t continue.

“Hoseok?” I call and it sounds like he had tossed something in the room.

“I forgot a mosquito net.” He sighs, peering out his own door to see me. I grin, coming well prepared for this. He isn’t even forgetful but it’s always good to have an extra on hand.

“I got one.” And so I got it for him. While the cabin warms itself we settle into our rooms, helping each other set up our nets. We pack up the fridge and make sure that everything is working properly. The tv doesn’t have any cable signal but there is a DVD player and some random DVD’s in the cabin. At least there will be plenty to do if we can't go outside.

“I’m so glad we didn’t pull up on some creepy run-down haunted-looking building.” Hobi giggles, taking a seat on the couch. “I got a little nervous there.” He smiles crossing his legs.

“A little? Pshh.” Jungkook teases, looking around, and finding his reflection in a beautiful gold framed mirror. I join Hobi, pulling out my phone.

“Aye, none of that.” he makes a click with his tongue, pushing my phone down to my lap. I shake my head, lifting it back up.

“We told Jin that we would text the chat when we got here.” he nods, as I pull up the chat. “Made it safely!” Immediately it returns a failed message. I frown, seeing that there is absolutely not a pinch of service.

“What’s the wifi?” I turn to Hobi who pulls out his phone as well.

“Glamping189 is the name, 456782 is the code.” He reads off of a screenshot. But it isn’t there. In fact, there isn’t anything listed under the available networks at all.

“Ah well, that’s shit.” I groan, turning to Jungkook who just shakes himself from staring at the mirror. Vain much? “Will you look around for a router?” He nods as I get up to help him search. There isn’t one, we search each and every corner but there isn’t one at all.

#bts #horror #bts fanfic #bts namjoon #btsedit #bts fic #bts au #bts hosoek #bts jeon jeongguk #bts jung hoseok

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writingsofmyimagination · 5 years ago

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Conjecture |9|

Idol Reader Au, Enemies to Lovers AU

Summary: Your management refused to renew your contract unless you collaborated, so you ending up working with Min Yoongi. A guy you’d disliked from before both of your debuts. There is more to their past than meets the eye.

Links to all other parts in my masterlist :)

Words:3941

Warnings: SMUT!! (BDSM themes, restraints, toys, oral m recieving, masturbation, Sub Yoongi with a tiny bit of Dom), Swearing.

It’s finally here guys! God it’s been too long since i worked on this! Love this chapter because of that!

if you want to be tagged let me know :)

Reblog, Like, Comment pwwwweeasse :)

//Yoongi obeyed and dressed albeit heavy with amusement. The way panic grew across your face tickled him and forged a drowsy grin on his face. He drew back the long black curtains and introduced the bright beams of the sun slowly ascending the skyline. As much your mum could be terrifyingly blunt Yoongi had always had a good relationship with her, quite often he’d find himself at one of your shows and end up chatting to your biggest fan and the one who brought you into this life. He slowed his pace nearing the junction to the living room and heard your mum giving you relationship advice before stepping into the situation.//

“Y/N!” Yoongi exclaimed when you’d grabbed his hand and pulled him into a harsh kiss as the elevator doors closed. His cheeks flushed rose when you let yourself pull away, your smirk thoroughly enjoying his embarrassment and awkwardness.

The meeting lasted a few hours and as soon the topic changed from the MAMAs to your relationship your mood soured incredibly quickly; the list of restrictions on your new relationship grew and grew like unwanted thistles over a perfect lawn. You knew this was going to be the case especially seeing as the situation concerned a member of BTS but it still grated you the wrong way. You couldn’t even hold hands in public! The air was thick with unease. You’d also been told to do a joint V-Live later on and announce the MAMA performance; an official statement regarding dating status was going to be released tomorrow morning.

Yoongi being Yoongi wasn’t sure how to deal with you in this agitated state, the only comfort he could offer was squeezing your hand with gentle pressure when you were finally alone in the elevator. The action so small actually bloomed into a lot of comfort.

“I’ll go get Charlie from Kook and make a phone call and I’ll be back okay baby” The way he looked at you, calling you baby with those contemplative gooey eyes somewhat soothed a little more of the turmoil in your mind.

“Sure, don’t be too long” offering a weak smile.

You gave the receptionist a smile which prompted they keys at her computer to stop emitting the tapping sound and make her way over to you, the unsure smile and never focusing eyes were the unmistakable signs of a fan approaching a celebrity

“Excuse me Miss YL/N” The politeness of when we first entered the building remained unaltered.

You replied with a soft smile beckoning her to continue, she towered above you as you were sat; she realised this and knelt down to your height after bowing.

“I just want to say that I’m a huge fan and so is my daughter we saw you in Seoul at your tour kick off, it was incredible”

You beamed at her with wide appreciative eyes.

“Thank you so much, glad you enjoyed it, how old is your daughter? You replied

“18”

“Exam week for her right?”

“Yeah it’s been a tense week for sure”

“What’s her name?” you asked

“Annabelle?” her tone was now quizzical.

“Would you mind if I recorded a video on your phone for her?” She swallowed hard as if her throat had just played victim to drought

“Oh my god, that would be amazing” her words stumbled out as did her hands giving you her phone.

You recorded a message of good luck and encouragement and promised that next time you toured she could have VIP passes to one of your shows for all her hard work. You took the receptionists details and sent them straight to your manager. Her face morphed from ecstatic to petrified when a door to the left of her desk opened.

She’s obviously not supposed to be fazed by the guests here

Thankfully it was only Yoongi accompanied by Charlie who was walking patiently by his side

“I didn’t know you was a y/n fan” Her only response was a guilty smile and returned to her desk.

Yoongi really needed to stop wearing skinny jeans with rips in, the just looked too good on him; not to mention how his oversized black t-shirt sat on him in such a way it emphasised how small he actually was. His skin always glowed even bare faced and tired; you were both jealous and in awe of this.

“Earth to Y/N, you don’t need to daydream about me ya know” he teased placing the lead in my hand. “I’m yours now remember”

You’d been busted

“That maybe but sometimes one imagines things not entirely appropriate” you shot back. His eyes grew wide as did his smirk.

“You going to let me in on the daydream then? Need to live up to my expectations now don’t I”

“Nope”

He visibly huffed before carrying on walking you both out of the building

“Fine, come on I want to show you something”

We arrived down a quiet street occupied by what looked like old factory buildings. Half of the street was shrouded in un-moving shadows, it blanketed the few of the cars left on the street. Yoongi pulled up and bursting with chivalry came and opened the door for you; as much as it felt odd you accepted his hand and stepped out the car. He pressed the buzzer at a Tuscan red bricked building, the door was a large factory one. All the while your head was turning and searching for anything that indicated where the hell you were and for any potentially impending paparazzi

“It’s me” He confirmed to the crispy, crackling voice of the intercom, a click reached your ears and Yoongi hauled the door open.

You certainly was not expecting to be welcomed into a large white room, the white walls were beaming; the tint of fresh paint aroma was hanging weak in the air. The only thing gracing the walls were a variety of shapes and sizes of photographs to be illuminated by the lamps that sat off above them. More central in the room were benches and small podium like stands with animals’ models shown proudly off them.

Before you could ask what you were doing here, Yoongi replied to the vacant look on your face.

“My friends opening an exhibition next week, I remember how much you like photography so here we are.

You were approached by a young faced man, bright face tarred with the lines of stress. He was dressed in navy trousers and a loose shirt.

“Oh I’m actually so glad you’re here” he rushed “Could you please hold the fort here for like 30 mins, the security people are running late but I’ve got to go and meet with the caterers” his face was flushed a red pink, poor thing.

“Uh Sure, yeah of course” Yoongi stuttered back.

“Also absolute pleasure to finally meet you Y/N, please enjoy” He offered you a bow down to his waist and placed a light respectful kiss on the back of your hand before zooming off.

“Nice to meet you too” your voice chasing after him.

“So I guess it’s just us then” your words slowed as they escaped you.

“Looks like”

You took his hand and moulded it to yours

“Guess we can look around the gallery like this then” you quipped bright as a button with the opportunity.

“Can also do this” he added yanking you to a kiss which then moulded you against his body, before you’d allow yourself to set you pulled yourself apart and focused your attention to the beautiful photographs at your personal viewing.

You’d spent about thirty grand in your mind already window shopping, it would be reality as soon as you worked out where on earth you’d hang them. One of them already would look perfect in your studio.

“He’s really talented”

“Yeah, even at college he was annoyingly talented, he beat me at every class” ….

“Well I’d say your both winning at life, just different departments. Reckon he has more in the back?”

“Probably yeah” he followed your lead, not that he had a choice, he was too content secured in your grip. The main back room was cluttered with debris of packaging and boxes, the only thing that was clear was a low sofa and a small table and chairs; the table was only lightly littered with food packets and wrappers. Along the far wall was a rack holding a stack of large prints all protected with a protective film for transporting.

You wandered off, releasing his grip and aimed straight for the rest of the prints. There was an expulsion of air from the leather sofa as Yoongi relaxed his weight to it; allowing you to browse excitedly with a content smirk resting on his face. You managed to catch the end of the sparkle of amusement trying to flicker away as you turned.

“What?”

“Nothing you’re just so adorable when you’re in your element”

“Call me adorable once more and BTS will need a new rapper” you warned.

“Ado……ra” he began, your eyes glistened with ‘you dare’; your uncontained smile only provoked him

“Ble” he finished looking smug.

“Is this adorable?” you breathed, teeth nipping at his neck, hand feathered at the back of his neck gripping at his hair. Your palm applying pressure through his trousers just underneath the apex of your thighs

“You know damn well it isn’t” he managed trying to keep all breathy moans from escaping to coax you more.

“You’ve gotta stop” he pleaded.

“Why?” lips enveloping his, delaying the response you knew was coming.

“You are going to get us into sooo much trouble and we really can’t have a scandal someone could be back any minute” his grip loosened at the outside of your thighs, further informing you of his sincerity.

“You mean you can’t! My reputation is quirky and beautifully tarnished at best. Yours is the squeaky clean one” You pouted, slumping back onto your legs shifting your weight to his legs.

“Put that bottom lip away before I call it adorable” you chuckled at his statement slapping his chest in amused disapproval.

The knock of the door almost jolted you on your ass as it made you jump and had you scrambling off Yoongi to an innocent position. A calm smile camouflaging the rapid panicking of your heart. After checking the window and confirming the work men you opened the door to an immediately flustered couple of guys. They definitely weren’t expecting two idols to greet them.

“Umm…I’m looking for..Mr” he stuttered. One pair of eyes was noticeably on you a hell of a lot more than Yoongi.

“He’ll be back any minute” Yoongi piped up, slightly stepping in front of you and pulling the door open from you. The protective gesture didn’t go unnoticed.

Hurried footsteps bombarded from behind to a flushed looking …

“I’m here, thank you” You and Yoongi wordlessly thanked him as the security guys were already going over plans like they couldn’t wait five god damn minutes.

The pair of you worked on some of the arrangement on the song until you both sub-misssed into your room at Yoongis and curled up together in comfy spoon and napped. The weight of your arms draped at his hips, your face nestled into the back of his neck was the perfect catalyst for sleep.

Everything was set for the V-Lives, you’d both wanted to air it from your own accounts so you’d managed to push two screens together in his studio and placed two cameras where each of the screens met so you’d be looking in the same direction.

The genius compromise came from you. Obviously.

“Ready?” he asked swivelling in his chair to your direction behind him faffing with your hair and fine tuning your makeup in a small mirror by the door.

“You’re shitting it aren’t you?” pushing himself up and out of his chair and wrapped himself around you from behind, head resting on your shoulder looking all bright and doey eyed at your reflection.

“Just nervous about the reactions we’ll get tomorrow more than anything” You confessed.

“It will be fine, we know they’ll be both good and bad, people will get over it. Anyway just see it as we’ll be the K-Pop power couple everyone will want to talk about”

You chuckled under your breath “Power couple? We’re not Jay Z and Beyonce” you quipped.

Both of you had thousands of viewers in minutes, watching the comments explode with excitement asking what’s going on had you wearing an amused smile leaning forward hand supporting your chin as your eyes scanned the influx of fans. Some of which were already saying you’d look like such a good couple.

After you’d made the performance announcement the V-live quickly deteriorated into a snowstorm of questions, you both did your best to control the blizzard without revealing any secret snowflakes.

“A lot of Army are asking what your favourite BTS song is” Yoongi directed at you with beautiful curious eyes.

“I think whatever it is you should totally sing some” he added knowing full well the power of army would make the peer pressure unbeatable. Even your fans comments turned on you and wanted to hear you sing.

“Seriously?” you asked bemused.

“Yep! Look literally everyone wants it and you can’t tell me as an artist you’ve not sung or prepared a version of it” he rolled his chair back and dragged out the mic stand and placed it defiantly in the room.

“I’ll play the piano for it” he encouraged. Your face felt the rush of blood tainting your cheeks.

“Erm, it��s so hard to pick just one, I guess either Tomorrow or House of Cards, you choose from them” you demanded, from the fans or Yoongi would do.

“We’ll do House of Cards, I think your vocals will be perfectly beautiful for that” Normally a compliment would be accompanied by a sugar coated gaze In your direction, not on live though, he turned without a moment’s hesitation and set up his keyboard. Fingers caressing the keys with such gentle precision as he warmed them up. The grey hoody slumped on his frame, his expressions hindered shielded underneath his black baseball cap.

“Hope you guys enjoy this” you stood tight, microphone facing side on to the camera allowing you to observe Yoongi from behind. The song had always sounded such a sexy ballad but under the keys of gentle fingers the piano made the song feel so sad, you inhaled as you nodded to Yoongi who played you into the song.

After a few bars the surroundings dissolved into the safe haven of your own room as if you were casually singing around the house. You’d even recorded a cover of this song. Just before the last note as Yoongi finished playing his smile and shimmering eyes reached you and shoved you straight back into shyness, you laughed through the flushness once again and gave a timid bow and scurried back your chair and shrouded yourself with your hood and scanned the screens for the comments. Yoongi just chuckled and joined you back at the computer.

“That was alright” he said as non chalantly as he could through his grin which he was attempting to squash.

You flung your wrist out and flicked it across the top of him arm with wide eyes and mouth.

“Ow” he exaggerated. His pout only encouraged you to do it again.

“They keep saying we’d be an awesome couple” his hands pointing at the pair of computers. You’d both agreed to not mention any comments hinting at anything like that. Without skipping a beat, as if you’re brain hadn’t just completely panicked.

“Can you imagine?” you managed through a giggle

“Ultimate power couple” you added reflecting on Yoongi’s comment earlier. The comments were flooding in on both feeds, flashing too quick to read but you got the gist of agreement and compliments.

You ended the session after minutes of sending your love and appreciation to fans and getting caught up in another few questions. It’s worse than leaving a house party and having to say your goodbyes to everyone on the way out.

“Thought we were avoiding any couple comments?” you glared at him returning the mic stand to its home behind the electronic keyboard.

“There were just too many to ignore” he defended tugging at your belt loop leaving you falling into his chest as he lent against the desk

“Don’t creep, we said not too! And you made me sing!” your fist curled into weak fist and rested at his chest, his hands rested at your lower back but they quickly started falling out of place and slid to cup your ass.

The sheets were ruffled into a hot mess, his fists were bound behind his back, beautifully decorated with black silk. His whines and pants were muffled by the mattress. The muscles at his shoulder blades were deliciously twitiching as he writhed under any contact you gave him. A pillow was under his hips raising his behind which was now a precious pink taking the shape of your hand. The quiet hum of the prostate massager just only audible over Yoongi’s tired moans, the hair around his neckline was damp and refused to move when he moved.

“Had enough?” the ache between your own legs becoming unbearable, you could feel the extent of your arousal as you moved. Tugging at his hair yanking his head up from the mattress.

“Yes, god please!” satisfied with the level of desperation saturating his voice you clicked and powered down the massager stealing a relieved groan into the mattress. The soft silk tie found a new lace on the floor freeing Yoongi’s arms as the fell to his sides

“Roll over” you ordered, leaving him no time to catch his breath.

“You look so sexy all fucked out” you breathed, fingers ghosting a teasing pattern down his thighs as your body soon followed your tongue gliding in so slow whirls around his throbbing cock. You allowed the hand that had ruffled into the top of your hair to stay, the tighter the ministrations of his grip only motivating you further.

“If you don’t want me to cum you gotta…” His hips bucked slightly even under the weight of one of your arms, his grunt catching is his throat. Your eyes shot upwards beneath the smirk growing at your lips swallowing him down. Your eyes were met with a regretful satisfied glance.

“What did I say would happen if you came before I said you could?” before relishing in a cup of water at the bedside.

“That I couldn’t make you cum and you’ll do it” the pangs of disappointment oozed into his voice, the confliction of what he knew was going to happen frustrated him yet sent a new wave of tingles rushing southward

This was fast becoming your favourite punishment for Yoongi for two reasons

1. His pride and selfishness made it torture for him if he wasn’t the one causing you to writhe in pleasure

2. To him it was the sexiest thing to watch and he’d end up frustrated and turned on again.

“You got it, you’ll have to listen to me moaning and touching myself when it could have been you if you did as you were told”

His body heavy with defeat against the bed as his eyes hollowed with dread and anticipation as they followed your every move as you shuffled up and laid down next to him, lightly pushing him on his side, he took your hint and rolled on his side facing away from you.

“You only deserve to hear me baby” you tease littering his shoulder blades with heavy kisses.

“You’re such a tease” he breathed.

“Mmhmm” you murmured already tracing your fingers through yourself. Fuck you were so wet honing in on your clit as you put yourself on your side and got as close to him as you could. He was going to feel every ministration of your hand as your hand brushed against his skin and your hips pushing forward slowly driving him up the wall of tease you loved to make him climb. He was going to hear all the explicit sweet nothings of you whimpering how much you much you wanted it to be his cock feeling your walls instead. How you wanted his fingers massaging your clit.

“Christ” he mumbled, barely audible through his face diving into the pillow as you cried out his name as you came over your own fingers. Your body jerking and your legs muscles tensing riding out your high.

“I’m going to take a cold shower before you make me do something you’ll only punish me for” he announced with a sense of exhausted cheekiness, chucking himself away from you leaving you with the devilish smirk. He didn’t complain about his punishment, at all. Opting to just try and cool down, you waited a few minutes before shuffling your way through the damp covers and followed him to the bathroom.

His main bathroom was exquisite, failing to find a different word worthy of the bathroom. Even the shower was majestic. The cubicle itself was large and oblong, at one end was a sauna like wooded slated bench just out of reach of the water; that was unless you turned a separate shower head on above the bench. The main waterfall shower head was centre of one of the longer walls surrounded by grey marble tiling only covered partially by the gold coloured shelving with copious bottles of skin, hair and body washes.

All that luxury was nothing compared to a bare Yoongi with his back to you dousing himself in water, the particles coating his skin. His behind still bearing your marks was sculpted by years of dancing; whether he like to dance or not you were certainly grateful.

“You can turn the cold off” your hands soaking up the contact from his sides, the freezing splashes rebounding off you, goose bumping your skin instantly. His hair flat against his forehead water using the strands as a runway before it landed on his chest and trailing down even further to his half erect member. This was soon remedied to full as your hands teased him

“Please don’t tease me anymore” he voice desperate and energy drained passing through a pleasing sweet smile.

“I’m done” he conceded, your skin left his as you feigned shock.

“Well I came here because I was going to let you sort that out” head dropping in the direction of his groin. “Any way you wanted seeing as you accepted your punishment with such grace but if you’re done then…” you turned in a deliberate slow movement to leave.

“Well that changes my status of done” his hand slid to secure yours, the pair of you had mirrored smug grins.

“I thought it might!” you detached yourself from him again and took a few cautious steps over to the sauna style seating at one end of the shower.

“So how do you want me” you toyed teasingly bending over hands resting on the bench giving him an eyeful he enjoyed. After a light chuckle diffused into a hungry glare he answered

“Right there” he affirmed through a groan as he pressed into you from behind, hands trailing up your back finding their grip at the back of your neck and hair.

“And I want you crying my name out” he added with a hard thrust knocking your forward through your own pleasurable whine.

“You better make me then”

#bts #btssmutclub #sub-bts-network #kwritersworldnet #btsguild #mygsnet #networkbangtan #kpopwonderlandtag #bangtanarmynet #yoongi x reader #min yoongi smut #min yoongi fanfic #BTS suga

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emoboijk · 6 years ago

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MYG | Lo-Fi Beats (01)

Lo-Fi: an aesthetic of recorded music in which the sound quality is lower than the usual contemporary standards so that imperfections of the recording and production are audible.—fluff, angst, idol!au

prologue :: 01 :: 02 :: 03 :: 04 :: 05 :: 06 :: epilogue

1,571 words

p.cred

Yoongi winced, holding the steaming cup of hot chocolate away from him as if it could bite. “It’s hot,” he whined.

“Yeah,” you giggled, sipping at your own cup tentatively. He glared at you playfully before looking out at the river. The peace lasted nearly a minute before he wiggled against the cool seat of the bench.

“It’s cold,” he grumbled, “Why are we out here? Is Namjoon rubbing off on you?”

You rolled your eyes, “If he’s rubbing off on me it can only be a good thing. Besides, hot chocolate is better in the cold.”

“Fuck no, it isn’t,” Yoongi grumbled, taking a sip of his cocoa anyway.

“Also because you needed a break from the studio.”

He didn’t argue, he didn’t shoot back at you with a witty comment, he just sighed and took another drink of his cocoa, enjoying the sun and even the cold and especially your company. It felt good to stretch his legs and breathe fresh air, or any air really that didn’t smell like old coffee and stale laundry.

Your phone buzzed against your side and you pulled it out to check. Yoongi, feeling more comfortable now, adjusting to the outside world, pressed himself into your side to read over your shoulder.

“Who’s Beomseok?” he squinted down at the small Hangul lettering like an interrogator at a criminal.

You smiled slightly, coughing almost awkwardly so that a puff of air appeared in front of your face, your cheeks going pink. A pang of jealousy hit Yoongi’s chest like an arrow.

“He’s just this new security guy at BigHit that Minji has a crush on,” you shook your head, “She falls so easily,” you mused, a laugh developing in your throat at the foolish antics of your best friend.

Yoongi smiled, relaxing back into the bench and drinking his cocoa smugly.

“So,” you grinned, turning to face him, “Have you written me a song today?”

Yoongi shrugged, smirking because this was his favorite game, “I don’t know, I’d have to be in my studio to tell you.”

“Not fair,” you whined, hitting his chest lightly, but smiling nonetheless, “Min Yoongi you promised me when we were six you’d write a song for me every day.”

“Being with you is writing a song for you,” he said. A pause. A desperate scramble in his pockets, the scratching of ink against his paper cup. A muttered, “I’m going to use that.”

You shook your head, smiling as you pushed your hair out of your eyes and sipped your cocoa, pride beaming in your chest like a radiator.

When you got back to BigHit, the place was as you normally found it: bustling. Lots of activity, people moving decisively on their way to meetings and appointments. You nodded your head to those you recognized—staff members milling about, the receptionist and security guards, all those who had seen you come and go at Yoongi’s side for years, and who now recognized you as a fellow employee—as you crossed the room to the security check.

Yoongi breezed through the checkpoint with a flick of his pass-card across the gate and slid through the revolving bars with ease. You paused at the check-point, smiling warmly at the middle-aged ahjussi in the guard’s uniform a little ways down. You dug into your purse to pull out the heavily stickered pass-card Yoongi had given you nearly three years ago—before you’d officially been hired—when BigHit had changed buildings. It had seen better days, but the screen lit green and the bars revolved as you pushed through them.

“What’s your next schedule?” you asked Yoongi, joining him by the elevator bay. Yoongi clenched his eyes shut, a little wrinkle above his nose as he thought about it.

“Rehearsal?” he wondered, “Or maybe a meeting with Bang-sajangnim? I have some writing I need to do today, and I have to record that guide for tomorrow...” he trailed off, pulling his phone from his pocket and swiping through it like second nature. You peered over his shoulder nosily.

“Ooh, free time until one-thirty,” you grinned.

“Yeah, but ‘free time’ doesn’t mean ‘free time.’ It means—” he paused, the doors opening to Taehyung and a group of staff members.

“Noona!” Tae cheered, diving out of the elevator boldly, leaving a group of bemused staff in his wake. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders heavily and squeezed you to his side.

“Tae-Tae,” you smiled, “Headed out?”

He nodded, his smile wide and boxy, making his whole face glow. “Stylist-noona is taking me to get a new hair color,” he shrugged. You smiled at Jiwoo from over his shoulder; she was rolling her eyes. The boys had started calling her “stylist-noona” since their debut days and had not once let it go.

You tousled the back of his hair, pouting, “Your poor head,” and at the same time he said, “Hanging out with Min-Grumpy today?”

You smiled and joked, “Trying to.”

Yoongi grumbled to himself. He stepped past the staff members hovering nervously around Taehyung (he was known to be a bit of a flight risk—not intentionally, of course, he just got...distracted), and said, “I’m leaving now.”

“Bye, ahjussi!” you joked again, waving to him as the elevator doors closed.

“Oh,” Taehyung said, frowning, “I’m already late.”

“Which means you’re right on time,” you said, squeezing his shoulder playfully and ducking out from his crowd, “I have to head downstairs anyway.”

“Bye noona!” he said, waving at you absently as something else already caught his eye. You chuckled and walked a few paces to the elevator that went as far as the basement. The basement, you had quickly learned, was where all of the important stuff was—the member’s individual studios, the producer’s offices, the recording booths, and, of course, the video editing office (where you worked).

You piled into the small space with a few other people, pressing close to the wall to take up less room. You raised your hand to hit the button for the basement and found that it was already lit. You raised your eyebrows and scanned the compartment—no one you recognized. Weird.

Just as you were about to pull out your cell phone you locked eyes with a stranger. He was tall, over six foot, with a sweep of dark hair across his forehead and a small smirk on his lips. His eyes were dark, and he’d taken his sunglasses off and put them on top of his head to look at you. You felt slightly possessed by the look in his eyes—a predatory danger that made you shiver, an uncomfortable feeling running down your spine as you sought refuge in your cell phone.

You had four messages:

Jiwoo: Taehyung escaped.

Jiwoo: Already.

Yoongi: I bought you a coffee. You’re welcome.

With a picture of a coffee cup from the cart in the basement, perched on your desk (recognizable by the photo of you with BTS pre-debut and the small Shooky plush leaning against it) with a message scribbled in his tight handwriting: Thanks for the cocoa. Coffee is better. —Min Grumpy

You smiled broadly at the image, your lips turning downward as you saw the last message:

Jihoon: Bang-sajangnim wants to meet with us this afternoon. Fill you in when you get back.

You frowned. Usually, when Bang wanted to meet with your team it was to shorten a deadline or introduce a new project. And all without considering the limited amount of staff.

“Bad news?” a voice said.

You looked up, noticing that the dispersal of people had now shifted in the elevator. The stranger was leaning over you, his arm against the wall, watching you with the same smirk as before.

You opened your mouth to say something, you weren’t sure what, when the doors dinged open. You ducked out from underneath him and followed the mass of people from the elevator.

Both Jihoon and Minji were waiting for you a few feet from the doors, and you walked to them like seeking shelter. You twisted to look back and found the stranger staring at you, a group of people ushering him in the opposite direction.

“Girl, how many cups of coffee is Min Yoongi going to buy you before he finally asks you out?” Minji giggled.

You rolled your eyes and pushed her playfully, turning your gaze back to the stranger again, “Who is that?”

They both followed your eyes and watched as he disappeared behind an office door with his entourage.

Jihoon shrugged, “I don’t know, but he looks kind of familiar.”

“He’s hot,” Minji said, causing you both to giggle light-heartedly.

“Come on,” Jihoon said pulling you towards your office, “We have a lot to do before the meeting with Bang-sajangnim. I want to get further on the new BTS documentary segments from 2018, and I’d like to finish the Bangtan Bombs we’ve been working on, and if you could finish translating the last two Run BTS episodes…”

“Woah, calm down,” Minji said, “We only have a couple of hours.”

“Yeah, there’s no use freaking out about it. We’ll do our best,” you said, squeezing his shoulder, “Besides, I finished translating those episodes yesterday, I just have to get everything entered in.”

“Oh,” Jihoon said, clasping his heart as you all walked through the doorway of the office, “You’re an angel.”

“Well,” you said, forming a mock halo with your fingers above your head and shrugging.

author’s note—grumpy but soft yoongi is just...perfect

02: meetings ↝

for more of my works check out my m.list ;; comments and messages are appreciated :)

#rosynamjoon #hyunglinenetwork #bangtanbuds #bts #bts x reader #bts series #bts yoongi #suga #suga x reader #yoongi x reader #min yoongi

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magistralucis · 6 years ago

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Ed Banger House Party @ Electric Brixton, 25 Jan 2019 [Review]

😍 Fucking fantastic you funky little Frenchmen... 😍

This was a very wild night. I can’t quite believe I survived it, even as I finish off writing thousands of words about it. It’s probably the most detailed review of a concert or show I have done to this date. I finally saw Sebastian in the flesh, was treated to over eight hours of sweet sweet music, and feel that I have begun my Ed Banger-related pursuits for this year in the perfect way.

And the loot. The sweet, sweet loot.

Read on for more. Mobile users, be warned this is a very long post.

The Journey

If you’ve read my other gig reviews you know the drill: I don’t live in London, have to commute there from wherever I’m living at the moment, London is difficult to navigate. But I had no trouble with my journeys this time, there were no Underground closures, and this venue was exactly the same one as the TBB show two years ago. Nothing to report there, only that I give props to our driver. There was an accident on the motorway, about 25 mins into a 2hr 20min journey. He took us on a thirty-mile detour to avoid the scene of the crash and still got us to London in time. If you’ve ever been on a National Express coach, you know what a big deal that is.

That wasn’t the only accident we stumbled upon in our journey, somewhere in Croydon (part of Outer London for non-UK readers) there was an altercation between two drivers and something like thirty police officers were present. It is rare to see that many police officers on scene for a single collision, so I wonder whether something more sinister was going on. All of them were wearing fluorescent vests and they reflected the light of the traffic most gloriously for a ten-meter stretch of the pavement. It was very attention-catching. I like to think they shared the same general sentiment of (o_o ) when they looked over and saw an entire busful of people goggling at them, but that’s neither here nor there. It was around 8:30PM when I got to London, and I spent some time lingering in the train station before making my way to Brixton.

I like queuing up early. I had no idea what I was going to find there.

9:20~PM: If you follow Thibaut on insta you might have seen this.

This instastory. It’s not obvious, but these three were far from the only ones in this picture. I know this because I FUCKING WALKED IN ON THIS PHOTOSHOOT. THESE THREE WERE NOT THE ONLY PEOPLE THERE. THIS WAS A VIP GROUP SHOT SESSION WITH 25+ PEOPLE OUTSIDE ELECTRIC BRIXTON AND I NEARLY BARGED IN AMONGST THEM LIKE A MOTHERFUCKING IDIOT

I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to! ;A ;

I’ve met my favourite bands spontaneously. Gone for signings. Received compliments from Rammstein. I’ve shaken hands with Xavier. But I’ve never just happened upon an entire group of my favourite people engaged in a situation not meant for ordinary fans. I was honestly more terrified than elated. I knew they were VIPs because they (all DJs included) had blue wristbands on which allowed continued re-entry into the club, instead of the usual red club stamp on the back of the hand. Later in the show I recognized two of those people as stage photographers. Pedro was closest to me, Irfane passed by (he had very vivid eyes, even under poor lighting), and around the right-hand side Thibaut was putting his arm around Sebastian. I may have seen Vladimir Cauchemar unmasked. Shit was surreal.

This could potentially have been a good place to greet Sebastian zdravo. Unfortunately there’s a time and place for such things, and a VIP photo session I wasn’t involved in was not one of them. (Electric Brixton isn’t known for facilitating after-show fan meets either, due to the club’s structure and how everyone has to be herded out at the end.) Even if it were just the Ed Banger folks milling around, I'm not sure if I’d have been able to approach them in this case. ‘Cause ultimately, I am just an Animal Experiencing Fear, and I was caught so off guard; I stepped back and pretended I had nothing to do with the area. At least that way I could gather my thoughts and continue to observe.

I can tell you this entire moment took five minutes from 9:23pm to 9:28pm, but only because I checked my phone later. I didn’t want to take it out in the moment because I got paranoid they’d think I was a creep. As the phones and cameras were put away and normal conversation resumed I looked up and saw Sebastian five steps in front of me.

You know that recent Seb + Vinco picture. Hang on I’ll find it. You know the look Seb has in that pic?

That. That is his actual gaze. That is what Seb actually looks like when he has nothing to pose for and nobody to speak to. Unless something mind-boggling was happening in the empty space several feet away from where I was standing, that’s his normal nothing-to-see-here expression. At one point we met eyes. I think he blinked like once. You can’t tell his eyes are blue even from a short distance. He looked down, exhaled vape smoke, and bit his lip. Then someone (Myd?) ushered him into the open doors. And that’s how I accidentally stumbled upon the Forbidden Ed Banger Content, and while I was excited at what I saw, I think I’d prefer a do-over in the future. When they’re not all engaged in other business, when I have a pen and an adequate surface, and when I am not a fool with poor timing.

Also Sebastian was not as tall as I thought he was, but also far from short; Irfane was taller than I thought, but visibly shorter than Thibaut; Thibaut was taller than I thought, but no match for Pedro, whose height continues to boggle my mind. I have seen all of those people before, save for Sebastian. Pedro I have seen multiple times, with multiple people, in multiple contexts. Yet I still have no grasp of how tall anybody is in this label.

I don’t know what that implies about my visualization skills. At this point, I’m too scared to find out.

9:33PM: I’m going with this timestamp because that’s when I noted down that security cleared out completely with the VIPs, closing the front doors behind them. A girl comes up near me and stares at the venue, the ‘Ed Banger Records’ written in lights, then at the queue barriers (not open) for some time before turning to me. There were maybe five people altogether waiting.

Girl: Excuse me, is this the queue for people with tickets?

Me: I don’t know. We might be queuing to find out where the queue is.

Girl: [To a freshly emerged security guard, holding a sandwich.] Excuse me, do you know if there’ll be tickets at the door?

Security guard: [Incomprehensible - he’s speaking at close distance and a bus is freshly pulling up behind me, so I can’t hear them. He goes inside and shuts the door as soon as he says his piece.]

Girl: He doesn’t know. What am I going to tell my friends.

Me: Oh my God did you not get tickets.

Girl: My friends did! I was meant to get in early and get the drinks and stuff oh my God I DIDN’T KNOW THEY WERE GOING TO BE SOLD OUT 😰

Me: DIDN’T THEY SAY THERE WOULD BE A LIMITED RELEASE THOUGH 😰

By this time we’re both mired in anxiety.txt and others were coming forwards with the same experience. A group of three girls who got there shortly after me were all waiting for door tickets, and a guy came along who had a ticket for himself but was trying to get his friend (Asian girl, very pretty) in. (I will see this friend repeatedly throughout the show, but not the dude.) Eventually we looked up what the Electric Brixton website had to say, and gathered that a very limited number of tickets were available and they were all here at the right time to purchase it. As far as I know, everyone there got in without trouble.

First release tickets were £15.00. Later I was told it was £25.00 at the door.

Yeesh.

9:50PM: They finally open up the queue barriers. I’m fourth. Several of us in the line take a poll on who we’re here to see:

Pedro: ///

Breakbot: //

Sebastian: ////

Riton: /

Vladimir:

Myd: /

‘Everyone’: //

‘I’m here because of my friends’: /

The girl in the above section answered with the last one. Ed Banger rookie. Writing this now, I’m sure she had the time of her life.

I say Sebastian. Two guys in front of me nod sagely. One of them wears a Woman Worldwide T-shirt and a Justice logo jacket. We mutually express wonder that Seb’s, like. Doing anything again. At this point, however, the queue is split into two: ticketed and buying at the door, on the opposite end of the entrance. The girl and I say farewells as she departs for the latter. Unfortunately, I do not get to see her again. It’s a shame. She was lovely.

9:55PM: Security emerges with QR code readers and club stamps and starts to call us in go go go go go go go go

9:58~PM: The bouncer initiating pat down pauses over my portable battery for a very long time, seemingly considering whether that’s legal. Fuck my life. Eventually, though, he lets me in and I s p r i n t for the bar.

It has begun.

A note before I start: like the XOYO gig review last year, this review has been composed via rough notes, photos, and videos I took through the show. It was a longer night than last year, and everyone played for a lengthy period of time; this review is thus split into six sections, one for each DJ, including timestamped observations and photos/gifs of the night.

The gifs are taken from my own videos. Unfortunately, Electric Brixton’s setup made photography difficult for three reasons: 1) an abundance of flashing lights, 2) the elevation difference between the dancefloor and the DJ booth, unlike in XOYO where there was no audience-DJ divide, and 3) smoke machines, as well as actual vapers in the form of Sebastian Akchoté. Those three things make a mess onscreen, so images are potato quality compared to where I was (front center). This was a constant problem during the night, so instead of complaining about it with every DJ, I’ll just refer to this as the I Cannot See For Shit (ICSFS) syndrome and call it a day.

Busy P (10PM to 11:50~PM)

10PM: Mother fucking sons of bitches raised the price of water!

As mentioned in the TBB review, a 500ml bottle of water at Electric Brixton was £3.00 in 2017. (Even in 2019, at a supermarket it can be as little as 55p/500ml.) Harsh, but it is what you’d expect from London. But when I came back they’d raised it to a whopping £3.60. You could buy yourself a meal with that kind of money, albeit a small one, even for London. Disgusting.

But what can you do with something as necessary as water. I did expect it. I’m sore about it, is all.

10:05PM: Restroom visited, water bought and tucked into bag, jacket tied around waist. I was wearing armwarmers. I take my place by the barriers, front row center, with a guy on my left and an empty space on my right. Left-hand arrangement will not change during the night, while on the right it will be chaos.

10:10PM: Very superstitious / nothin' more to say / very superstitious / the devil's on his way / thirteen month old baby / broke the lookin' glass / seven years of bad luck / good things in your past

This is my first video of the night. Might upload it later.

10:21PM: USE IMAGINATION 💫 AS A DESTINATION 💘 USE IMAGINATION 💫 AS A DESTINATIoOoON 💘 USE IMAGINATION AND COME CLooOoOSER 👄✨ 👄 FOREVER BEEEEE 😘 😘💋

‘Pleasure’ summons the two dudes I was talking to in the queue to my right, especially the Justice fan guy. They stuck with me through Pedro’s set.

10:30~PM: Pedro looks a lot happier than he did at XOYO last year. He’s interacting a lot with fans, smiling, bopping about the way we have all come to expect from him.

10:40PM: I see the first glimpse of another DJ hanging around at the back. It’s Myd, drinking in a corner.

10:50PM: Is that what I think it is. I think it’s what I think it is

10:51PM: POP THE GLOCK THE GLOCK YOU POP IF YOU OUTTA LINE IT’S YOU I’LL BANG POP POP THE GLOCK THE GLOCK YOU POP IF YOU OUTTA LINE IT’S YOU I’LL BANG POP

Fantastic to hear some Uffie in the mix. I missed her so damn much. I think I might upload that clip as well because I want to share the experience with y’alls.

10:54PM: Thibaut jitterbugs into the scene. The lighting’s too bad for a photo so I post about it on the hellsite instead.

11:19PM: The display in front of the DJ booth has remained constant until this point, displaying the Ed Banger logo with only the occasional change in lighting. But now the display suddenly starts changing. Check it out.

It got really trippy with Breakbot.

11:29PM: ‘Genie’ comes on. I can see Thibaut and Irfane at the back now, ready to take over. I take my first drink since I entered the club.

11:52PM: HE PUT ON ‘BURNIN’. HE ACTUALLY DID THAT.

Pedro picks up the mic at this point and greets us for the first time during the night. I have what he said on video but it’s hard for me to transcribe it over all the audience noise, it might have to be an upload later on; I have videos of most DJ-DJ segues of this night, so hopefully that should be an interesting exercise. According to the timestamp on this video, 11:52-53PM is when Thibaut put on the headphones and took over from Pedro, but he continues to linger

11:55PM:

just so he can cOMPLETELY LOSE HIS SHIT APPARENTLY.

Breakbot (Thibaut and Irfane) (11:50~PM to 1:30AM)

12:00AM: At midnight Thibaut and Irfane take over fully with ‘Break of Dawn’. There’s something wild about listening to people sing a song with no lyrics (da DA DA DA darararaRA).

12:05AM: Irfane was on serious mode all night. I’ve also realized that the light situation is not going to get better; if it was Pedro alone I could have forgotten about it, but Breakbot’s set was where the ICSFS got really, really bad. There are so many photos where I tried to capture beautiful moments between Thibaut and Irfane, as they were quite touchy with one another (not as much as they were at XOYO tho), and yet it all turned to shit. I’m so sad.

12:10~AM: The two dudes to the right of me leave. The music is most funky fresh and the smoke machines are on max, so much I cannot actually see either of the DJs on scene. A girl wearing light blue takes over to my right.

I think Electric Brixton has reached full capacity. It’s not a big venue, fitting only about 2000 people or so, but I can feel it in the air. I look behind me and all around me are unfamiliar faces, packed tightly in a crowd. It’s hot. I take off my armwarmers and cram them into my bag.

12:16AM: Irfane baby I love you but that was not a smooth segue.

(I don’t actually know what song he was on but the music like. Stopped 100% for a second. It didn’t sound intentional.)

12:25AM: I have a note on my phone that says ‘12:25 Pedro making heart’. I have no memory of this. Fangirl magistralucis what are your secrets.

12:30AM: you 😍💖 are all I think about 😍✨😍✨😍 keep me sulking and down 😘👇🏼 but you fill me with 🔥 so much 🔥 emotion 😳💖😳 and I’ll show my 🙏🏼🕊💐 devotion 💐🕊🙏🏼 to you ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

12:31AM: I cannot see for shit. Here have a light show I guess.

12:36AM: Dance, dance with me / Life's a fantasy / Stand next to me / Like ecstasy

12:48AM: Irfane puts on ‘Funkytown’. Thibaut dances beautifully. I’ll drink to that.

12:51AM:

What the hell is this?

1:07AM: Extra, extra, read all about it! The Mysterious Ninth Planet, located at last! Turns out it was in the hands of funky Frenchmen all along, who were hoarding not just the ninth planet, but ALL THE PLANETS

1:08AM: You may have seen what was happening during the above in Irfane’s instastory, actually. He put on ‘Le Freak’. I wonder whether I should upload this clip from where I was.

1:10AM:

?????

1:20AM: Pedro comes back into view. I try to film him but it doesn’t work out, and for once it had nothing to do with ICSFS. The girl to the right of me, who was rocking out for all of Breakbot’s set, is beginning to slump over on the railing. "Are you okay?” I call, but I don’t think she heard. From how rapidly it came on, how she could barely stand during the first five minutes of VC’s set, and how frantically her and her friends left afterwards (she could barely walk), it is quite possible she was going into diabetic shock. She did not return.

This is a known issue. You generally cannot bring food into London clubs, even if you’re diabetic. Electric Brixton had a complaint two years ago that a diabetic person was not permitted to bring in their food to prevent this exact thing happening. I hope whatever she had wasn’t that serious, but. I do wonder.

This leads to a note about security, I suppose. There were none up front by the barriers. There was no one to call for help to, except for maybe the stage photographers, and that’s not what they’re trained to do. People who were falling sick or too inebriated to stand would have benefited from having security help them beyond the barrier straight away, instead of having to wade their way back through a tight crowd.

This continued to be a problem.

1:20~AM: Vladimir Cauchemar is visible. He doesn’t have the skull mask on, but with something smooth concealing his face, kind of like the Taikobots of Danger’s Taiko-era set. When he takes over he has put the mask on.

Vladimir Cauchemar (1:30AM to 2:30AM)

1:30AM: I gotta say, VC was the easiest and the best to photograph in this show, and I both respect and resent that fact.

VC’s lighting stayed a consistent red and black through his set, similar to how it was at XOYO, and the clearest images I have of the night are of him. I’m still not over his collab with 6**9*** so my impression of him isn’t out of the woods yet, which is why my notes for him are brief.

I tell you what, though. He got the crowd going. VC was the first DJ to get the dude standing to the left of me dancing, and this is the dude who stayed the entire eight hours of the night by my side while on my right people faded in, faded out, barged into places. (Dude was holding out for Sebastian, but stuck around for all of Myd as well.) His set had serious limitations - the most gregarious sin of which I’ve noted down below - but he had a great stage personality. I have very mixed feelings.

Still didn’t prevent me from standing out certain songs to go on Russian duolingo, but that was my pride.

1:35AM: ‘Aulos’ comes on. I will upload that video because I might as well, I’ve little else videoed for VC. Someone taps my shoulder. It’s the friend of the dude whom I encountered outside, the Asian girl. “Can I put this here?” She calls, and places her coat down beyond the barrier; there are steps on the other side where you can place your drinks, bags, coats etc if you’re front row. She withdraws behind me afterwards, and when I next look back, she’s gone.

1:40AM: I’m honestly surprised how many people are digging VC’s set. He was not first choice for anyone I asked.

1:51AM: Vladimir, Aulos is great but not twice in the same set.

2:00AM: Third drink of the night. My legs are getting numb. The first 3-4 hours of a set are always the hardest. I don’t remember what VC was playing. At several points he played Michael Jackson but I have no record of when. I stood still to rest my legs and distracted myself with other pursuits.

2:18AM:

Hi I’m in this photo and I don’t like it.

2:26AM: VLADIMIR. AULOS IS GREAT, BUT NOT THRICE IN THE SAME SET.

This. This is the major problem with his set. I know it’s his biggest hit, but VC exploits ‘Aulos’ way too much, and from what I hear he essentially does this for every set he plays. Would it injure him to play a different song every now and then. Seriously. There are so many excellent songs in the world, and some of them might even be ones he’ll drop in the future. Why stick to ‘Aulos’ alone. I don’t get it.

2:26~AM: As I was noting down the third instance of ‘Aulos’, the girl who put her coat down returned. “Can I have my coat back?” She calls over the sound, and I peer over. I can’t see the coat. The red spotlight passes over the floor; the coat’s rolled off the steps and is now lying on the ground.

“I can’t reach it.” I shout. “It’s fallen off.”

“Oh no.” She shouts.

“Can you wait until the segue?”

She shakes her head. “I’ll go over the barrier, but thanks.”

I offer to help her over, but she doesn’t think she'll make it. She ducks out past the crowd and goes around the side instead (no security to stop her), runs over to grab her coat, and then leaves straight away. She’ll be back for Sebastian’s set, but now it’s Riton time.

Riton (2:30AM to 3:30AM)

I didn’t enjoy Riton’s set very much. This had 0% to do with his music and everything to do with the chaos on my right-hand side, which made it worse. If it was the artist that was bad you chalk it up to a mismatch in interests, but knowing other concertgoers unilaterally deprived you of a good experience is a unique level of terrible. There are no timestamps for this section because I was too busy keeping an eye on my surroundings to take notes; he was also afflicted with the ICSFS, which didn’t help, but it’s a darn shame how much I missed out.

Oh and that too. That was his light show. Riton was a special guest and his name/logo was the dominant display for the entirety of his set. But I’m not here to talk about that. I’m here to talk about the chip on my shoulder.

Here’s the thing. I attend most of the gigs I go to by myself. I prefer it that way because I get anxious when things go wrong. I have a very specific set of items I bring with me to concerts, and practice very meticulous timekeeping. One of the rules I observe during gigs is that I do not move from my position: I prefer front centre or front centre-right generally, but wherever it is, I stay put.

I am not a tall woman. If I lose my place, it is unlikely I’d get it back. I’m full of anxiety about being at my place, but I’m more anxious to avoid losing it, so I defend it with all my might. I have never lost my place in almost ten years and this show was no exception. But my goodness did the guys to my right push my buttons this time. The guy who was to the right of me for Riton was with a group, all of whom were banging on the barriers and creating a ruckus. Just my luck he was the only one who seemed actually inebriated. He kept putting his head down on the railing, slumped over for minutes at a time, before suddenly raving and flailing around whenever Riton dropped a beat. He had no consideration for whoever he was accidentally knocking about (i.e. me) during this. And as I said, there was no security up front, so I was on my own.

At first I had some sympathy, because I still wasn’t over the girl who left earlier. I’ve never seen people who were inebriated/high during shows last very long where they were, either. But the fifteenth time dude nearly poked my eye out, it was just too much. I do not like people prodding their way into my personal space. I do not like it, Sam-I-Am.

The last time I had to be vicious with a concertgoer was at TBB, where a ginger-haired girl kept on trying to tear people from their place up front, and eventually was ejected by security after she got into a catfight with another girl next to me. Apparently this time it was my turn to give into Righteously Indignant Bitch Hours and the next time he started flailing his arm into my neck, I grabbed him and slammed his hand onto the railing and shouted “WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU.”

I wish I could say this made him stop. However, life is dumb. Dude was too out of it to comprehend his own actions, let alone my complaints. His friends pulled him out of the front row for about five minutes but then he came staggering back, muttering something about his lens cap (?) and if I’d seen it. It wasn’t long before he began to barge into the surrounding people again. Only elbows were the solution; I can barely move my right arm even now, it feels so bruised. I’m not proud of what I did, but I’m not sure what I could have done differently, and I would do the same even now.

But, you know. It could have been worse. If you’ve been front row, you know there’s a difference between those who’re trying to grab a good time and those who act out of malice. The former usually try to sneak a hand in next to yours on the railing, or crash into you from the back, or wedge their way in - but they almost always follow it up with an apology, and they tend to carve out their own little space, not actively steal yours. Yes I’m talking about that ginger-haired girl at the TBB show again. I’ve attended full on firebreathing industrial metal shows at much bigger, suffocating venues, and yet those audiences still managed to avoid being vicious and petty. She was the worst. Holy shit. It’s been two years and I’m still mad. Fucking bitch I hope you step in a puddle. What was I writing about again? Oh yeah the dude. He wasn’t acting out of malice, but out of irresponsibility. And to be honest, his friends weren’t that better, save for a girl who was about five feet eight tall and complimented that I was still standing later in the set: “I had to sit down after Thibaut and you’re still jumping like nothing happened!”

That made me think about my own stamina. I never thought I had much. I’m twenty-five years old. I’m in my prime, but I had more energy when I was eighteen, and I am old enough to keep that in mind. I’m not getting younger. After a show I’m bruised and my muscles ache and I pass out asleep for hours at a time. I’m usually awake for 30hrs~ during those times. I don’t eat or drink much before shows to prevent bathroom breaks. I ate on 3:30pm on the 25th and didn’t touch a single morsel of food again until 7am on the 26th, and even then it was a sandwich. After dancing for eight hours.

It’s been that way for years. But maybe most people? Don’t? Do that? And maybe I am? Actually quite strong? For regularly surviving what I do to myself?

I don’t know. Let’s move onto what I think 70% of you are here to read about.

Sebastian (3:30AM to 4:30AM)

3:30AM: Predictably, Sebastian gets the loudest cheers of the night when he comes on. Riton announces him and passes him the headphones. He still does the hand thing, by the way.

This thing.

3:30~AM: Not an observation of the moment, but of the entire set. Seb played some big name EDM songs and what I believe are versions of his YLS tracks. He was the only set I wanted to record in full, but I wasn’t tall enough and my equipment wasn’t good enough to do so. ICSFS is in play. I sort of hoped he'd stuck with his vicious red lighting from Primary Tour, and he did, but not to a degree where I could get good shots of him.

Is anyone excited for him to drop an album this year or what. Pedro said he would.

3:38AM: Seb also has the dubious honour of being the only DJ who contributed extra to the ICSFS problem. He vapes through the entire set. I have lots of feelings and I don’t know what to do with myself honestly.

3:39AM: Neither do the dudes to my right. They are the friends of the inebriated dude who has since staggered off into the crowd. They are completely losing their shit, screaming and taking their shirts off and kicking at the barriers. They contributed to some of the bruises on my right arm. But they still didn’t take my place so whatever.

3:40~AM: Seb is not a smiler. Photographer comes by and he gives him a single glance before turning back. I don’t know why I’m surprised.

3:43AM: The Asian girl with the coat from earlier comes back. She asks me to deposit a different layer of coat this time over the barrier, and stands behind me. I feel very protected.

3:50~AM: Balm to aid my pain: photographers start coming down from the stage to pass out Ed Banger pins and stickers. The first lot are thrown into the audience, but the second photographer takes the time to give all of us one. This is the first time I’ve scored thrown Ed Banger merch during a set. I usually can’t reach them because I am smol.

I am also bonding with the dude to my left during this time. We collaborate to catch the pins we want and share them out between the two of us. He gets the Ed Banger melody logo pin, and gives me the Ed Banger 15 Ans pin. “Are you sure?” I ask. He smiles and nods. I thank him and hand him a Breakbot sticker, one that’s of his name.

4:06AM: What the fuck the lights are changing

4:06AM: Is that

4:06AM: IT IS

4:07AM: IT’S JUSTICE. IT’S HEAVY METAL. SEB’S PLAYING HEAVY METAL AND HE’S DOING THE HAND THING AND THE LIGHT SHOW’S TRIPPY AS FUCK ALL OF A SUDDEN AND EVERYONE IS SCREAMING AND THE DUDE LEFT OF ME IS DECLARING HIS LOVE FOR SEB IN FRENCH AND I AM SCREAMING OH MY FUCKING GOD

4:09AM: HE SEGUES TO ROLLIN’ AND SCRATCHIN’. HE LITERALLY DID THAT. SEBASTIAN AKCHOTE IS PLAYING ROLLIN’ AND SCRATCHIN’ AND WE’RE ALL GOING BATSHIT INSANE. I’M SORRY FOR THE BAD CAMERA WORK. THIS IS HOW I DIE.

4:15~AM: Myd is finally going back and forth. He will close the night after Sebastian has finished his set. Looking back on the videos of the night, I can’t believe he only played for an hour; it felt a bit longer than that, Sebastian never let up for a single second as long as he was onstage. Not a single minute wasted. And now you’re going to have to excuse me babes because he’s puttING ON STRESS AND WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE AGAIN RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW

4:24AM: AAAAAAAAAAAA

(Seb’s still playing Stress. Looping the chainsaw noises. Steady camera work lmao what steady camera work)

4:30AM: Sebastian hands over the reins to Myd at this point. I do not have a video of this segue because he does not announce the takeover; with one of his inscrutable hand gestures and a proud look, Sebastian takes up a whole bottle of wine and silently walks offstage. Again, I don’t know why I am remotely surprised. That is probably the most Seb thing I have seen Seb do all night, and it was a night extremely full of Seb things.

At this point I stop jotting down notes on my phone. But I’m at about 58% battery and going strong, so I’m still taking photos and videos whenever I can. Myd’s section is reconstructed from these records.

Myd (Round 2) (4:30~AM to 6:00AM)

4:30~AM: Not a specific observation. As mentioned in the Breakbot review of May 2018, I have unfinished business with Myd. Or at least: had. Myd played the closer in XOYO last year, and back then I was weak and I could not stay through his entire set. I swore to myself the next time he returned, and I was able to see him, I would last as long as he was onstage.

And I did. That’s one promise to myself kept, and what I hope was a little justice done for a DJ of Myd’s caliber.

4:35AM: Coat girl taps my shoulder again. “I’m going home. Could you...?” She gestures to the barrier, and I reach down and pull up her coat. It didn’t roll onto the ground this time.

“There you are.” I say. She takes it and gives me a hug. “Have a good night.”

“Have a good night!” Then she’s gone, alongside the exodus of people who are leaving the club. More people stuck around for Myd here than in XOYO. Guy to my left nudges me to look; stickers are coming around again, specifically the ‘Hello My Name Is _______ [Myd]’ one. We each take one.

4:44AM: I’m out of water. Actually I was out of water immediately before Seb finished, because for some reason I thought downing the last of my only means of hydration with over 1h 30mins to go was a sensible thing to do. I regret this decision bitterly, but I’ll probably survive.

4:58AM:

@_@

5:03AM: It is very difficult for me to ID Myd’s tracks. I suspect a lot of them are original or are from his recent release that I haven’t yet listened to. Appropriate to a closer, he takes a very trance-inspired line to his entire set, with lots of repetition and few loud drops; this was the same in XOYO. I wonder what a Myd headliner set must be like.

5:10~AM: The guy to the left of me is struggling. So am I. But further to his left, there is a guy slumped on the rails. His girlfriend is beside him. They’ve been there all night, but they’ve clearly reached their limit. My right hand side keeps refilling and emptying as people step away or leave.

I talk about that other guy because he summons Thibaut to him.

5:28AM: I took several vids of this but this timestamp belongs to the longest. Thibaut comes back with his own phone to film the audience. He winks and shyly gestures all of us to gather our strengths and be more pumped up, and I recall we obliged him because he asked so nicely. He lingered for some time, gazing at us as fondly as we were gazing at him. He then looked at the guy slumped over on the railing and hopped down from the stage, gently patting his shoulder to talk to him.

I didn’t hear any of their conversation, save for Thibaut asking the dude ‘where he was from’. By the way he clasped his hand to his chest several times, though, I’m inclined to think he was really concerned about the guy. They eventually shook hands and Thibaut made as if to hop back onstage. (The photo was taken as he was leaving.)

Except he couldn’t jump that high. He gave us another shy look and braced his foot against the barriers, perching neatly on the stage before clambering up. He stuck around for about five more minutes to check up on the audience.

I love Thibaut so much. He’s so gentle.

5:34~AM: Holy fuck my bag is full of crap. I haven’t organized it in some time. Discarded cups, beer cans etc have accumulated by my feet, and as I kick them away I’m trying to check my loot is in place and I still have my items. I can’t feel my passport and my blood runs cold for a moment. I turn the camera flash on to look.

“Are you looking for something?” The guy to my left asks worriedly.

I feel my passport in my front pocket. False alarm. “Just organizing my bag.”

(I didn’t see any lost foreign ID or driver licenses on the floor this time.)

5:43AM:

Russian duolingo says fuck millennial lives

5:50~AM: The smoke machine is turned off. I still can’t see for shit, though, because the lights flash rapidly between deep blue and violet and Myd’s hidden behind it.

My last video of the night is timestamped 5:55AM. Myd has a most benevolent smile on his face. He knows the night is drawing to a close.

6:00AM: I did it.

We made it.

I have made it through a Myd set fully and have survived the night.

Myd finished exactly at 6am and exited to a crowd of applause. There are calls for an encore, but given that it's... like, literally morning, it’s not realistic to expect him to stay any longer. Security comes by as soon as he exits, and we all leave Electric Brixton behind at last. The sun has not yet risen. I fall in step with the guy next to me.

Guy: Where are you heading to?

Me: Coach. I came up from Brighton.

Guy: From Brighton?! Was that last night or what?

Me: Yep, two hours before the show. I haven’t eaten or slept all night.

Guy: Wow. [Pause.] Though I think that’s the longest I’ve danced in my entire life, too.

Me: You’re not kidding. I really didn’t think I was going to last beyond Sebastian.

I think he was a Londoner. We say farewells in front of the Electric Brixton bus stop, and I leave for the Underground. My legs are numb and I can barely walk, but somehow I stumble past the barriers and sink into the seats of the train. Back at Victoria Train Station I drop in at Sainsburys for a sandwich and two cans of grape soda, and then realizing I need a resealable container to take on the bus, buy a bottle of Pepsi. The grape soda was just because I really love grape soda and I cannot find a place in Brighton that sells any. It was around 8AM when I finally got on the coach back home.

I had not slept for some twenty hours. I continued to not sleep on the bus. I tried very hard to, but I couldn’t, because I was still buzzing from the adrenaline. It wasn’t until I got home, just after 11AM, that I began to feel sleepy for real. Sig. other made me a cup of tea, and I took the interval to admire some cat slippersocks that had arrived for me in the meantime.

LOOK AT IT.

Overall I’d say this was a fantastic night. I have taken care of unfinished business and seen Sebastian in the flesh. I have, however, come away with another unfinished business to replace the deal with Myd - I should seek out Riton again, the next time he comes here, and deliver a full review of what that was like. To think of the Ed Banger crew making their way across Europe in 2019, with new material and a new Sebastian in tow...

😍😍😍

53 notes · View notes

clubdolan · 6 years ago

Text

A Tame Surprise | E&G

I know you all hate when I use names but since there’s two girls, one dating each boy, I had to or it was SO confusing.. just for me to write it was confusing. So there’s names. If you want, copy and paste it into word or pages and then ctrl+f and it’ll give you an option to find one word (one of the names) and replace it with yours or someone else. Anyways.

Stella + E - she’s a writer/singer ‘Stella Jade’, was friends with them long before they started dating, met them through Bryant, dating E for a year now, kept it secret for months but once she had a few shows in california he kept attending she posted a cute candid of them before a show with an odd caption (she was side stage with him behind her, resting his head on top of hers, his arms around her shoulders and her hands holding onto his arms and a microphone) ‘bagels in the morning’ it said beneath it, she’s about to go on tour and open for Camila Cabello, spends her time hidden in the studio or wandering around with a backpack on full of notebooks and markers to write down ideas

Liv + G - she’s a fellow YouTuber, ‘Livi’ (aka: ‘LivianaXO’) makes videos about beauty, fashion and traveling, just hit 6 million subscribers and 2.5 million instagram followers, they met at a convention and kept in contact while she still lived in Texas and immediately started hanging out when she moved to LA, no one knows when they really ‘started dating’ but they estimate six or seven months, she has collaborated with morphe and colourpop, she used to be hidden behind her computer at all times to edit but she recently hired and editor and enjoys having spare time to actually do things like pilates (with g) and thrift for hours upon end

Two girls walked up the drive way, one filming themselves with a camera and explaining their plan.

“We’ve started filming because they may be able to use today for a Tuesday video but they don’t know what we’re doing. So they won’t just film it... I don’t know, but we’re getting the behind the scenes until Kyle shows up.” Liv panned over to the other girl who had stopped and was texting quickly on her phone. “We still good?”

“Yes. Perfect, we’ve got like 4 hours.” Stella sighed in relief and put her phone in her pocket before quickly catching up, just as they reached the door and let themselves in.

“HIIIII!” Echoed down the halls as they screamed in unison and walked to the living room to find Grayson sitting on his phone.

“Hi babe---why are you filming?” He stopped in front of Liv, looking directly at the camera.

“It’s a surprise.”

“What is?”

“What we’re about to do.”

“You said it was the flea market.”

“I lied. But I promise you’ll love it.” She grinned looking at his face droop, “You can get new records tomorrow, we can drive to the place in Venice.”

“I assume E’s in bed still because he hasn’t answered my texts.” Stella groaned, laying across the couch.

“Actually he just got out of the shower. I told him to not text you because I was texting her. Hoping it would hurry him up.” Grayson rolled his eyes, “But really, you’re filming?”

“It’s for your channel, if you want it.”

“You’ll want it.” Stella reverberated, scrolling on her phone with a portable steamer up to her nose and mouth. She had spent the past 48 hours in the studio and her voice was on it’s last life.

“Three minutes late.” Ethan said, shoving his phone in his pocket and swinging his keys around his finger. “Why are you filming?”

“They’re surprising us...” Grayson said, looking at both of them suspiciously. “And Kyle’s on his way to film, she got his number from my phone.” Liv smiled at her antics; she wasn’t just using his phone to see what her Instagram looked like to the public the other day.

“Put your key down, we’ve got a car outside.” Stella patted Ethan’s chest and went towards the door, “First, we’re stopping to get tea.. or coffee.. whatever. Then.. it’s happening.” She whispered the end, pulling her steamer up to her face as she backed out the door.

Stella’s honey and lemon tea was not really what she wanted, she about drooled over the three iced chai lattes the others got but continued to sip on her tea.

“You can have a drink of min--”

Before Ethan could finish Liv had turned around from the middle row of the SUV, “NO! She can only have tea and warm or room temperature water.”

“One sip?” He inched it closer to Stella’s face and watched Liv’s reaction, “No sip, okay, got it.”

Stella sighed, “You both need to lay down now.” She motioned to her lap, pulling her steamer back to her mouth. A mumble came from behind the little mask, “You can't see where we’re going.”

Without hesitating they both moved around to lay their heads in their girlfriends laps, looking up at the roof of the car. “Is it far?”

“Depends on traffic.” Liv said, “Probably like twenty minutes.”

Thirty minutes later, Ethan was asleep in the back seat, one arm over his head and the other holding onto Stella’s hand on his chest.

Grayson and Liv talked about home renovations he was wanting to make and she looked up paint colors for their guest house. They had practically become Mr. Kate and Joey in the past few weeks, rebuilding and painting anything they could. “It’s good content.” They would both say, carrying an old table and chairs into the backyard.

Ethan was barely awake as Stella dragged him down the side walk of a random road of shops he’d never been to. She was talking on the phone saying they were almost there before she hung up. “Where ar--

“Stop asking.”

Liv and Grayson followed them, she knew if Stella was calm, everything was going to plan.

Just then Stella turned and knocked on a black door to a building with no sign on it. Grayson and Ethan exchanged looks but Liv assured them it was fine.

“Stella Jane!” A strong voice announced as the door opened, “I’ve heard you’ve been here all week.” His voice was adorned with a thick British accent.

“On and off.” She held up the steamer and he laughed as he opened the door. “This is my boyfriend, Ethan. That’s his brother Grayson and his girlfriend, Liv, who I think you’ve met before.” Both the guy and her nodded, “This is Pauly, he owns this place.”

Everyone waved and said hello. “What is this place?” Grayson asked, looking down the weird hallway in front of him.

“A recording studio, come on.” Stella grabbed Ethan’s hand and led them to a room. She sent a quick text and a door opened, her friend Spencer answered the door, pushing it open wider to reveal her writing team.

The group chatted for a few minutes as Stella talked to the producer that sat in front of a bright computer with big red headphones on.

She turned around when she felt a hand on her back, “Stel, is this the surprise?”

“No, I just want to hear a cut of this song real quick.” She smiled up at him and grabbed his hand, keeping hold of it as she turned to mention one more thing to the producer before pushing Ethan to sit on the couch.

Surround sound speakers started playing a beat and Liv noticed quickly, “Avalanche?” (click the word for the song)

Stella nodded back to her, holding crossed fingers in the air, “Hopefully finished.”

You always find the exit sign in a crowded room

Everybody wants their shot, but you're bulletproof

She sat on the arm of the couch, mouthing the words as they played, every beat was coincided with a fake drumming motion and the harder notes would make her face squeeze together as she heard them. As the chorus came, Liv began bouncing along with Stella as she had heard a rough cut of the song millions of times.

So you’re scared, don’t think you’re ready yet

We'll take it slow, I'll walk with you on the edge

Paint the colors on top of the sunset

Stella turned to face Ethan, pointing as she dramatically lip synced along.

So give me one night, one minute

And I'll watch you fall like an avalanche

Let your walls down, I swear you won't regret it

Hold on tight, baby, if you can

She turned to look at the producer’s computer as he made notes. The song kept playing and another writer handed Ethan a notebook he immediately recognized as Stella’s. It was flipped to a page where Avalance was written all over it in marker, scribbles, words, notes, tiny drawings, a chipotle order and at the bottom a tiny heart with E+S inside of it.

Stella turned around, looking at the other writers with a death glare, “I will kill all of you” she whispered and they laughed.

“You don’t look too worried.” One said as Ethan flipped through the pages.

She shrugged her shoulders as the song ended, “I mean if by now people don’t realize my good relationship songs are about E, I don’t know who they think I’m talking about.”

“Why does this one say PG 13 in bright red? Make Up?” He asked, holding her notebook up to her.

Liv and Stella lost it as she pulled it from his hands, “That means it’s not on the album. I recorded it though. But my Nanny would drop dead if she heard it.”

“It’s a total bop.” One of the writers added, the second accent they had heard today. “It’s just a little... risqué.. a bit... bold.”

“She sings about fucking with someone...” Liv said, “You I guess?” She looked at Ethan who looked at Stella.

“Okay, not like that.” She groaned, “It’s like.. I mess with you and make you mad so we can make up and all is good in the end, smooth sailing, let’s--

She froze as the familiar sounds played over the speaker, “Please don’t. Turn it off. Please.” She begged the producer, who just leaned back in his chair and smiled as it played.

In agony she fell from the arm fo the couch and onto Ethan’s lap, digging her head into his shoulder as he laughed. (click for the song)

I like to fuck with you-- just to make up with you 'Cause-- the way you be screamin’ my name Make me wanna make love to you I might break up with you-- just to make up with you At-- the end of the day, boy You know that I'm 'bout to wake up with you

The writers mumbled lyrics along, swaying in their seats,

“I love it when we make up. Go ’head, ruin my makeup.”

The entire song she kept her head buried in his shoulder, glad she requested it not be on an album.

“I like it.” Ethan said to her as the song finished. Her head swiveled to make eye contact with him, “I mean I don’t dislike make up sex either.” He mumbled to her, making her laugh.

“I hate to break up this listening party” Liv stood up and announced, “but we still have a surprise to...show you.”

“Yes, surprise, think of that, not me or my songs.” Stella stood up and walked to the door, “I’ll be back tonight to finish recording.” She opened the door and motioned for them to leave, following the other three into the hallway.

“So as you can see, there’s a bunch of recording studios here. So we scheduled you one so you two can create a song!” She excitedly said, waiting for their reaction, which was nothing. “Well that wasn’t a fun response.”

“You’re not recording a song.”

“You can if you want to.”

“We don’t want to.”

“What’s the surprise?” Ethan sighed.

“In the back of this place is a room they call a set-up venue which means like, you set up your stage before tour to make sure it’ll all fit and yeah. I was wondering in the halls the other day and ran into someone who is using the set-up venue and we got to chatting for a while and I went to see what they were up to. Anyways,” She took a deep breath, “I asked if we could come to a rehearsal of theirs and I figured I would invite you guys.”

Liv danced around in excitement, “You’re gunna freak.”

“We’re going to go in and there’s like some old booth seats from a diner we can chill in. Just like don't record stuff, that was their only request.” Stella grabbed both of Ethan’s hands and pulled him behind her, weaving down a few hallways before they reached a door, “This is all sound proof, so prepare for it to be a little loud.”

She pushed open the metal door and sound came blasting out, “No fucking way.” Ethan froze, stopping Stella from walking in. “No.”

“Yeeeees, come on.” She tugged at him, but obviously he didn’t budge. “Come on, Gray.” She looked over at a gobsmacked Grayson, “I told you you’d like it.”

“Tame?” Ethan peered at Grayson who replied with the same thing, “Tame.”

“We said you’d like it.”

With another tug of his arm she led them all to the row of booths along a side wall. A full band was set up, playing a song and continuing with their set, lights were going off and a few crew members ran in and out to swap instruments.

Ethan grabbed Stella’s thigh, almost crushing it, “What the fuck?” She could only laugh and wrap her arms around his, resting her head on his shoulder to listen.

The twins kept exchanging glances at each other, especially when different songs started.

“This is my favorite.”

“This is his favorite.”

“This music video is rad.”

“Bryant loves this one.”

“This one just came out.”

A brilliant guitar solo played at the end as the lights above the band shut off. “One more run through and we’re good today.” A crew member yelled, grabbing guitars.

“Hey Stella!” One walked over, giving her a quick hug.

“That ending... was sick.”

“Ahh, thanks, we debated on that or a quick synth drop out.”

“Keep the guitar.” She nodded, “This is who I told you about. My boyfriend Ethan, his brother Grayson and his girlfriend Liv. Guys this is Jay.”

“And I’m Kevin.” The lead singer came up with a cup of tea, sticking his hand out to join in on the round of hand shakes. “What’d you think?”

“Uhh, awesome.” It was as if Grayson couldn’t speak, “We’re coming to the LA show in a few months.”

“Yeah you are, we’ll have to get you hooked up with some passes, I’ll talk to Stella about it.”

“They’re being weird...” Stella laughed at the boys, “You’re their favorite. Records play all day, all night, in the car, everywhere.”

“Cool, I’m glad you like it.” Jay smiled, “Can’t wait for you to hear the new album.”

“When’s that coming out?”

An hour later they were leaving the studio, holding in giggles and internal screams until Stella finished talking to Pauly and let the door close.

“HOLY SHIT” Ethan grabbed Stella and held her over his shoulder, “Are you kidding me!?” He jumped up and down, Stella laughed at his excitement. “Seriously?” He pulled her down to face him, holding her up by her bottom, “Did we really just watch Tame Impala rehearse?”

“Did we really just talk to them?” Grayson asked, shaking Liv’s arm. “Like we met Kevin and Jay and Dom and Cam? Or am I dreaming?”

“You’re not dreaming.” Liv softly smacked his cheek.

“Harder.”

She returned the smack with a loud slap being heard, “No, not dreaming.” He grabbed her for a hug and didn’t let go, walking with her backwards down the sidewalk.

“I can’t believe you.” Ethan sat Stella down, grabbing her cheeks, “I can’t.. like... how did that happen?”

“I was talking to Jay and it just led from there.” He kissed her lips, then her cheek, her nose, her other cheek, her chin, her lips and her forehead as she giggled, “You’re welcome.”

“I just want to..” His eyes squinted as he let out a yell, leaning back in to kiss her. “You’re the absolute best.”

“Ahhh, shucks.” She shrugged as if it was no problem. “I like having that title. Absolute best. Don’t forget to tell everybody that.”

“I will literally tell everyone.” He grabbed her hand and started following Grayson and Liv to the car, who were singing a Tame song to each other in an over-dramatic fashion. “Like, hi this is my girlfriend Stella and she’s the absolute best.”

They filmed their reaction with Kyle before they got into the car and he kept filming as they talked about it in the car, blasting songs to sing along to.

Later that night Ethan posted pictures of Stella sitting on his lap in the studio that Liv took without them knowing. He was holding her notebook and they were laughing at each other in the first one. The second one she was listening to someone across the room and Ethan had his chin resting on top of her head, also looking at the person who was talking. Stella was slid down between his legs, holding onto his hands that wrapped around her body with her feet on the little table in front of them.

@ethandolan: Today we filmed next Tuesday’s video. I can’t tell you what it is but @stellajane and @livlivliv surprised @graysondolan and I with one of the coolest things. (Stel is the ABSOLUTE BEST)

Stella replied-- ‘I just love being the absolute best. 😎’

Liv replied-- ‘📷 pic cred ur welcome 📷’

Stella replied to Liv-- ‘yeah 😂 thanks for secretly taking pictures 🕵🏼‍♀️’

Grayson replied-- ‘I still don’t even believe it happened.’

Then Grayson replied-- ’You’re ugly.’

#me #mine #grayson #ethan #grayson dolan #ethan dolan #dolan twins #tame impala #fanfic #fanfiction #imagine #writing #blurb #idea #girlfriends #dolan

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fordarkisthesuede · 6 years ago

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At the Brink of Midnight - Chapter 9

*Arrives two days late with Starbucks* ‘Sup, guys! σ( ▼∀▼)σ These past 96 hours have somehow filled me with a weird chaotic energy, and I pumped out the longest roller-coaster of a chapter I’ve ever done in such a short amount of time!!! Thank you, whoever sent all the writing vibes my way!!!! ★>d(,,･ε´-,,)⌒☆ I’m sending out strong vibes to everybody in return! *May you get hit by the writing bug and have the opportunity and energy to completely translate your ideas to printed words!*

Buuut a big note before we get to the good stuff: I realized too late that the original events of S2 take place in Spring. Like…April. I was writing all of this with the thought that S2 took place in fall; I mean, the characters can wear a leather jacket or a couple of layers comfortably, so I thought “yeah that sounds like early autumn”. Nope! So that means that for this story’s timeline, everything gets shifted into where it should be. On the downside, that means I had to go through and edit all the bits where it said “it was totally spring, you guys”. On the upside… IT’S NOW OCTOBER!!!!! THE SPOOKY SEASON THAT COMPLETELY FITS WITH WHAT’S GOING ON!!! And coincidentally, it’s my favorite time of the year, so I love writing about it even more! I get to add in a thing here and there about the spookiest time of the year, so I’ll have a nice list of what those little changes are uploaded here soon if you don’t feel like re-reading the whole thing. A re-read isn't necessary though, just keep in mind that the humid air of rainy spring in the city is replaced with chilling fronts and even more cloud cover than usual. Why am I bothering with this? Because I’m a stickler for keeping with canon as much as possible and I feel like an absolute fool for not remembering what goddamn time of year it was to begin with. (I mean, I went so far as to download all of TeamFourStar’s play-through because I watched it so often, you think I'd remember to go back and watch the very beginning once in a while…)

Anywho, thank you all again for your continuously loving support!!!

♡~(ɔ ˘3˘)˘⌣˘ c)

Important Spoiler Tags: drugs (mentioned), swearing, canon-typical violence, electric shocks (mentioned), torture of flowers, flirting, almost an excessive use of emoji, crying, romantic dirty thoughts

Read on Ao3 or continue below:

Chapter 9: Grapevines

Bruce Wayne couldn’t remember the last time he’d conducted a meeting from his home office. It wasn’t as if he didn’t use it – the desk surface had hardly any dust settled on it and two empty coffee mugs he’d forgotten about on two different occasions just happened to be stacked behind the monitor – but it felt strange, like a lot of things did lately.

He knew part of the reason for that was watching houses down in the Batcave right now. Knowing he wasn’t alone in the house was comforting, but knowing there were two cops outside the Manor’s front door just waiting for a chance to grab his best friend-cum-houseguest was not, and knowing that they were both close to being thrown in hot water was even less so.

He figured the other reason he felt strange was because he was slipping back into his old habit as if it had never been shelved in the first place. He had time to kill before the video meeting started, so he’d been scouring for information on “Pam”, Jonathan Crane’s ‘old friend’.

There were a few Pamela’s in Gotham, but only one fit within Crane’s age-range and attended Gotham University at about the same time: Pamela Isley, a forty-four-year-old former botanist with a record that ran the length of his arm. Theft, assault, threats, and attempted poisonings all done in the name of extreme environmentalism and social activism were sprinkled in her history before and after her days as a researcher, and according to GCPD records, she was now suspected of running her own drug-ring under the moniker of ‘Poison Ivy’. (Bruce found several recorded instances of people claiming to be Poison Ivy, most of whom were already arrested.)

Bruce would’ve wondered why on Earth she hadn’t been thrown in prison when she made a bomb-threat at a wealthy businessman several states away nearly a decade ago if he hadn’t seen her mug-shot from back then. At thirty-five, she looked every bit as beautiful as a top-billed Hollywood star, with natural orange-red curls cascading over her pale shoulders and ample bust in chemically-tamed waves, flashing the camera a come-hither stare that made it look like she was trying for a part in a high-budget porn flick rather than standing in front of a height chart for her criminal record. Pamela’s charges were mysteriously swept under the rug.

The latest photo he found of her reminded him a bit of those ‘cougar’ dating ads he’d seen – the older Pamela was blowing a kiss to the camera with a mocking look in her dark green eyes. Bruce glared at it. There was little doubt she was using people to cover for her constantly, and when she was in trouble, she managed to wriggle out of it with her looks.

Not this time. She was friends with Dr. Jonathan Crane, and that meant she wasn’t going to get out of this unharmed. The second his virtual meeting was over, Bruce was heading towards Toxic Acres, and hopefully the wounded Crane would still be there to see Batman’s fist hit his –

Bruce snapped out of his thoughts at the buzz of his phone. A message from the BatComputer…?

I’m bored :/

Bruce blinked down at the screen. John had found the emergency messaging system. Of course he had. He was just grateful that the encryption software on his phone was still up to date. Just what else did John poke his nose into down there…? (There was the chance that John would see files he shouldn’t, but Bruce kept those under a thumbprint encryption. He shouldn’t even entertain the thought.)

Stake-outs are usually pretty boring.

It wouldn’t be so bad if you were down here tho! :)

Bruce hovered his thumb over the keyboard, unsure of what to say. The feeling was kind of mutual, if he was being honest; having another person around on a stakeout would at least keep his mind wandering into the worsts of what-ifs and double-checking every last security issue…

No movement on either houses btw. Been reading Crane’s docs in the meantime but it’s DREADFUL!!! I feel like I’m reading a sleeping pill… =_=

You finish your WE stuff yet?

Meeting’s not for another 20 minutes. Been looking up stuff on Crane’s “friend”.

Oh??? :o Do tell!!!!

Bruce couldn’t help but smile at the enthusiasm.

Pamela Isley, former botanist w/ criminal rec., mostly extreme protest kind of stuff. Good chance she’s the head of a drug-ring that moved here a couple months ago; their leader goes by “Poison Ivy”.

They went to college together, but Pamela moved back here recently.

hMmMmm…. That means no burning the place down if we’re stuck! Bad fumes everywhere xP

Bruce focused on the word “we’re”. He hadn’t been planning on bringing John along. He wanted him safe, at home, where no one had a chance of seeing him and he wasn’t put in harm’s way…

Oh!!! You’ve got a bunch of sticky electro-shockers around - do you mind if I tinker with them? :3c pleeeeaaasssee?

What are you thinking of doing with them?

Making one BIIIIIG shock-bomb, of course! ;D I can wire them together so the shock spreads evenly in the space while it’s discharging.

Bruce reconsidered bringing John. He was still learning to curb his impulses, so being outside in a fighting environment would be a serious gamble, but... Maybe that could be their advantage, too. Bruce made a mental note to go dig out the spare bullet-proof vest from his closet’s secret panel.

You can do that?

I played around with making something like it before, but……well, you know.

Time + supplies for that project were low att. I figured I could always go back to it later anyway.

Bruce felt like his heart had deflated and swelled in such a short time that it hurt.

I mean I’m fine with throwing knives around too but I figured that would be less discrete ¯\_(ツ )_/¯

He’d been thinking of different methods of entering the “house”. Most of them featured a silent slip-in and as little combat as possible, but he knew that there would likely be some muscle around to stop any would-be intruders, and getting a quieter jump on them would certainly be helpful. He would certainly be lying if he said he wasn’t impressed that John had thought that far ahead even back then.

If you think you can get it done within 1.5 hours, then yes.

Ha ha ha with these supplies I can get it done in like 40 mins! >:3 just you watch!!!

Btw have you seen the news?

Not yet. Why?

I was on the morning edition! At least they used a good pic ;D

But also saw a guy getting fished out of the harbor. Your handy-dandy invasion software said he’s a registered Ryde driver.

I told you not to fiddle with that.

Sorry, but I only used it the once! Promise!!!

Bruce sighed through his nostrils.

Besides I thought you’d want to know. Think Crane stole his ride and dumped him by the docks? :v

Probably. I can get the plate from up here to verify. DO NOT TOUCH THAT PROGRAM AGAIN.

Yes sir ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Bruce wasn’t sure if that message was supposed to be flirtatious or mocking.

The incoming call from Iman Avesta stopped him from responding. He figured it had to do with John’s escape and the extra security added at Wayne Tower this morning, but why was she calling him now, rather than several hours ago?

“Iman?”

“Hey, Bruce. Hold on a sec – there we go, now we can both -”

“Bruce, what the fuck?” Tiffany asked over the line. “Are you at home right now?”

Bruce almost sighed at the attitude. “Yes, Tiffany, I’m at home, in my office.”

“Uh-huh. I keep getting alerts that your basement’s messaging system is being used. Care to explain that?”

Oh. Of course. He’d forgotten Tiffany had linked her phone to that, too. It’d just…been too long, he supposed. (She couldn’t read them, though, could she? He was fairly sure it didn’t give out mass-texts unless prompted.) “…where are you right now?”

Iman responded instead. “We’re in your second office.”

“…the line’s secure?”

“Of course.” Iman paused, and Bruce knew his new CSO was choosing her words carefully. “I’m guessing you have John Doe in the Batcave?”

“Yes.”

“Bruce, did you fucking break him out?” Tiffany asked with no shortness of impatience.

“I rescued him,” Bruce said firmly. “I know what you’re thinking, and I have a pretty good idea of what you’re going to say, but listen: I had no choice but to take him with me. One of the doctors working at Arkham has gone rogue – he’d been doing experiments on patients, and I have a feeling he’s going to continue them on civilians. I need to find him before then, and John has been helping me.”

“Helping…? You’re not bringing him in the field with you?” Tiffany said disbelievingly. “After that psychopath almost killed us?”

Bruce could still see Joker running at Tiffany, knife in hand, his psychotic breakdown in full force. He could still see him being smacked against the railing, sheer madness played over his long, bloody face as he desperately fought to stab what was his hero.

But John and Joker were as much the same as Bruce and Batman were, and they were constantly changing.

The Joker in the Batcave wasn’t the same one from Ace Chemicals.

“I know what John did,” he answered, trying to breathe even as something wanted to hitch in his throat, “and I know how far he’s come since then. I know you both regret-”

“No, I’m not listening to this right now,” Tiffany scowled, her voice fading in the middle her sentence like she was leaving the room. “Talk some sense into him.”

Bruce heard Iman’s voice call after her, and then nothing for a beat.

Iman sighed. “I’ll talk to her. But Bruce,” she started seriously, “Tiffany isn’t the only one worrying about you. Six months can’t possibly cure everything wrong with a man whose spent his life in an asylum.” He could practically hear her chew over her phrasing. “I need to know… If John goes too far – if he shows signs of regressing…or just becoming more volatile – I need to know you’re going to put your foot down.”

“I’m more than capable of handling him, Iman.”

“Please, Bruce, I’d rather not have to pull you off another broken pipe lodged in your kidney.” She paused, and Bruce let her continue, feeling the scar in his side twinge at the painful memory. “I know you care a lot about him,” she resumed in a softer tone, “and I know you trust him. But if you doubt him at any time, you need you to step back and re-evaluate your choices. I don’t want him to regress back into the Joker.”

That was a different Joker, Bruce wanted to say. He knew that wouldn’t sound the way it should. “I promise I won’t let that happen.”

“Good to know,” Iman replied, sounding somewhat relieved. “This doctor you’re hunting – is there anything we can do to help?”

Bruce shot a look at the clock in the corner of his monitor. He didn’t have as much time left as he would’ve liked before his virtual meeting started. “Tiffany can fill you in a bit, I had her help searching Arkham’s records before. Can you run a plate for me? I think Dr. Crane is running with a stolen car; I’ll send you the details in a bit.”

“Sure. We can check traffic cams for it, too, if you’d like.”

“If you would. And the second I have anything concrete on Dr. Crane, I’m sending Tiffany the details – I need her pull as Oracle to get the word out to the GCPD before anything happens. They’ll listen to their number-one informant more than a vigilante coming out of retirement.”

“…you’re…?”

He could almost see the shock in her face. They’d had a short discussion about his alter-ego when he decided to quit the first time; she’d been incredibly understanding about the whole thing. It was almost as if she’d seen it coming.

“Are you sure?”

He was as sure. She didn’t know about the instincts broiling underneath his surface every day. She didn’t know he never really stopped being half of himself. She wouldn’t know or really understand that he just shoved it all down and aside like he did so much else just to get through things. “I don’t have any other options at this point.”

“…you know you can count on us if you need the help.”

“Of course I do.”

“Right. Well, in the meantime we’ll keep the fort over here running as smoothly as possible.”

“Thank you. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Good luck.”

The line went silent, and Bruce pulled his phone away, catching a glimpse of three unread messages.

Sorry, buddy, I was just kidding around, you know? Ha ha

Bruce???

Hello???????

Sorry, had a phone call and couldn’t reply. It’s fine.

Seconds ticked by, and Bruce began changing out of his black t-shirt and into his button-down. It wouldn’t do to appear as a CEO in anything less than a proper suit. He could leave the jeans on, at least.

“Oh! Uh…sorry, Bruce…”

He felt his heart stop for a second. That was definitely John’s voice, even though it crackled slightly from the speakers. The monitor didn’t show anything out of the ordinary. John must have been using the spy-camera feature on the Batcomputer; it was linked to most the devices in the house, and Bruce’s webcam was no exception. He’d almost forgotten it had a loudspeaker function, too.

“I didn’t realize you were…um, changing.”

Bruce glared at the webcam’s lens. “John, what did I tell you about fiddling with the Batcomputer?”

“…sorry. I was worried when you didn’t answer me.”

He sounded genuine, at least. Bruce could easily picture him running upstairs to find him, if there wasn’t a chance he would’ve been seen. “I answered you a minute ago. I was on a call with Iman,” he stated plainly, fixing the buttons on his sleeves.

“…oh, ha ha, there it is! Uh, I guess I’ll just…go, then…”

Bruce almost questioned why John was sounding nervous and distracted, but it wasn’t until he saw the webcam light wink off again that he realized his shirt was wide open, the scars littering his torso half on display from the waist up.

Thankfully, no one was around to see Bruce bury his face in the palm of his hand for a moment, feeling like his face was on fire from first and second-hand embarrassment.

It didn’t last long. Bruce took a few deep breaths as he fixed himself up, and dialed into the meeting with a fixed expression of calm, firmly ignoring the heat that had settled in his stomach that threatened to go lower at the thought that John was bound not to forget any of that.

Driving the Batmobile in full gear again was certainly something else. Bruce felt the weight of the Kevlar body armor press against his limbs as he sped down Gotham’s twisting alley streets, no one any the wiser that the Wayne’s red sports car was hiding Batman behind it. The city’s CCTV signal was scrambled with the flick of a switch as he came into driving distance of the alley’s camera, making him almost untraceable.

He’d given the Honda Accord a head-start; it couldn’t go nearly as fast as the Batmobile, and Bruce had to find a spot to safely change before going to go pick John up from his drop-off point, and the post-working-hours traffic had already gotten its usual early start. It was a slower drive than he’d like it to be, even with Bruce’s shortcuts.

The setting sun was completely obscured by a dark overcast. It made the orange streetlamps glowing over the decorations sitting here and there in windows and doors even more energetic, like every corner of Gotham was slowly growing with the energy of Halloween.

Bruce clicked the communicator in his cowl. “John, are you there yet?”

Silence for a few seconds, and then a rustling noise. “Sorry, I had to take this off for a bit. What?”

“Are you there yet?”

John giggled slightly. “Oh, yeah, I’m here. Just waiting on you, pal.”

He was already at the meeting point? How did he get there so fast? “You put everything back where it was supposed to be?”

“No, I stripped the seats and threw everything into the garbage,” John grumbled with dripping sarcasm. “Of course I did, it’d be rude not to put Jerry’s stuff back. What do you take me for?”

“…I’m just making sure you didn’t forget anything.”

“I didn’t.” There was a loud slurping noise, like the last of a liquid being sucked from a straw.

“John, where are you right now?”

“In the alley, waiting for you.”

“Did you make a stop?”

John giggled, a little louder, but not at all nervous. He was enjoying himself. “What can I say? Going out on the town with you like this makes me thirsty,” he said with a strange purr. “Besides, no one bats an eye at me when I look like this anyway.” He paused. “Well, no, I’ve gotten some eyes on me, but, uh, I think they’re more the appreciative type. I guess ZZ Top was kinda right about the sharp-dresser thing.”

Bruce felt his brows knit together. “You’ve always looked sharp,” he said truthfully, turning down a narrow alley.

“Yeah, but not thousand-dollar-suit sharp. There’s a difference! Plus I think this bullet-proof vest makes me look a little bulkier than I actually am.”

Bruce spotted him leaning against the graffiti-covered wall, a Burger Lord cup in one hand and a plastic orange bag in another. Just how much time did Bruce lose while he was changing?

John tossed the drink in the dumpster and practically jumped into the car, shoving the orange bag behind the driver seat and slamming the door shut as Bruce switched off the communicator. He took one look at Bruce’s questioning glower and gave a nervous sort of grin. “Hey, don’t look at me like that, there’s something in there for you, too.”

Bruce almost asked what, but decided that a lecture on keeping a low profile and not taking money from his house’s various hiding spots would have to wait. (Though he supposed whatever John got wasn’t expensive. He was quite frugal, and it wasn’t as if Bruce couldn’t afford to buy John whatever he wanted anyway.) He concentrated instead on heading down the twisting path towards Toxic Acres. At least the traffic over there was a hell of a lot lighter.

“Hey, when you drove me to the Batcave, did you go in fourth gear, or third?”

He wasn’t sure why he asked, but he honestly couldn’t remember. He just recalled putting his foot to the floor and keeping his eyes on the road, occasionally reaching over to check John’s pulse. “I wasn’t really paying attention to that; I concentrating more on driving as fast as possible.”

“Oh – so you didn’t know you could punch the shift down into third whenever you wanted? It was so fun! I can say I literally punched it out of the Batcave!” He laughed. “I’m guessing you can’t do that in this car?”

“…I’ve got paddle shifters.” They were starting to travel into the more deserted road leading into Toxic Acres. Bruce took a sharp turn onto the hill with the broken Do Not Enter sign, and checking that no one was behind him, flipped the switch to shift the car into armored plates and pressed the wheel-paddle for a lower gear.

They flew down the road with a whirring whine of the engine, John’s notorious excited laugh mixing with it, and Bruce allowed himself to smile a little at it, knowing his own little joyful thrill wouldn’t last very long.

John was soon tapping his fingers together in some kind of rhythm as they passed by more empty houses, Bruce moving a little slower to keep his eyes out for trouble. Sitting close to the river on the outskirts of the city, they were originally meant to be a long neighborhood for the middle and upper class to build their lives, but as the unemployment and crime rates rose, the place became abandoned. It didn’t help that the piping structure to carry water there had been faulty, making either lead poisoning or unfiltered dirty water a prominent problem and giving the section of Gotham its nickname.

“How do we know which place is the botanist’s?” John asked, his green eyes scouring the houses in front of them.

“I sent out another drone earlier for some aerial shots. There’s a place with camouflaged green-houses in the back on Aster Place.”

“Wow, you did that before I left? That was fast…”

“It was a quick job. I’m not picking up the other drone until later.”

They turned the corner onto Aster Place; the road would dead-end in a while, but Bruce knew the house wouldn’t be situated at the end.

“Oh, there’s the spot Jackie got shot at!” John pointed ahead. “I wonder if there’s a bloodstain left…!”

Bruce tightened his grip on the wheel. “We’re close.”

It was oddly quiet out there. There was no other sign of life in what was a hot-spot of criminal hide-outs. Bruce turned on the thermal vision in his cowl; a lot of the houses were actually empty for once.

Except for one. 1801 Aster Place. There were a group of people scattered around on the bottom floor and what appeared to be a lot of heat-lamps running on the top floor. If one of the people in the group wasn’t Pamela Isley, then she might have been holding up in the basement…

They left the Batmobile out of sight down the road, and Bruce and John moved swiftly behind the backs of the houses in the chilly night air, the taser bomb safely in John’s coat pocket; John was surprisingly quiet, only humming a familiar tune here and there. (Wasn’t it the theme from that old spy-thriller…?) Bruce managed to quiet him with a look, and John mimed locking his mouth shut and throwing the key away.

Two unknown people were standing in what used to be a kitchen; three more people were up in the front room of the house. There were no security cameras to be seen.

“Stick close to me,” Bruce whispered, the modifier in his cowl deepening his voice. “We go in through the back window, take out the two in the kitchen quietly and throw the bomb up front so we can cuff the lot. If none of them are Ms. Isley, we find the basement.”

John gave him a thumbs up, pulling out the riot baton he had hidden away. (Bruce had still not remembered when he or Alfred bought that, but vaguely remembered stashing it in the towel cupboard with some other emergency gear. He wasn’t surprised John found it.)

The bathroom window’s locks weren’t difficult to break. They looked like they had been broken several times already. Bruce slid the insect screen up and slipped in through the thin opening feet-first, twisting his limbs just right to softly land on the floor. He had to help pull John through the rest of the way after he smacked his head on the bottom of the window; thankfully he hadn’t made any noise, but he did give Bruce a strange look as brushed himself off where Bruce had gripped his sides.

Bruce didn’t have time to think about it.

The two people in the kitchen stood in semi-darkness, watching through the patio windows with rifles leaning against the wall. There wasn’t so much a bare bulb to give off light. Bruce figured their eyes might have adjusted to the dark, and signaled John to follow as he crept up behind the two goons.

“I dunno, with all the hype surrounding episode four, you just know those guys are going to mess up somewhere. Remember when they decided to let Celestyne drop to his death back in season one?” The one with dreadlocks asked.

“Oh, come on, that was just to test the game’s limits. Besides, Celestyne couldn’t die; I don’t think Jane can, either,” the second person responded in a higher voice with a casual shrug.

“Dude, you know the game’s gonna make her a villain in the end, though, right? She might die…”

Bruce was ready. John was gripping the baton with a widening grin…

“Are you kidding me? They have her affection meter up so high I’m surprised the game doesn’t have a dating opt-”

Bruce slammed dreadlocked goon’s head into the wall just as the baton crashed down on the other goon’s skull, little smears of blood marking the plaster and paint with a satisfying crack.

John clutched the collar of the goon he’d struck, gripping the slightly bloody baton a little harder in his other hand. He seemed to be thinking.

Bruce took a zip-tie out and cuffed the goon’s hands behind their back, and wondered just what John was staring at until he’d turned the person around and caught a glimpse of them in the light of the window.

They were both women with little tattoos of vines creeping along the back of their necks.

If Bruce guessed right, those were ivy leaves on the vine. Poison Ivy had a loyal gang.

John zip-tied the wrists of the woman he’d struck and patted the part of her head that wasn’t wounded. “Sorry,” he whispered as if she would hear it. “Lauren’s ex,” John mumbled, gesturing to the woman on the floor as if he knew Bruce had raised his eyebrow at him.

Bruce simply swept onward, spying the door for the basement. There was a light on in the front room, and three women who looked like they could be professional boxers of different weight categories were sitting in different areas. One was sharpening a knife at the table, and another was cleaning a semi-automatic rifle as the third kept watch over a monitor showing security camera footage; three looked to be by the greenhouses (Bruce recognized the Foxglove variety growing in one under an opening in the glass, sitting next to something that looked primeval), and two were watching over the plants upstairs (marijuana, by the looks of it) and in the basement.

There was a figure in the last screen, working over a row of potted plants with low lamps. A zoom-in with Bruce’s lenses showed long red hair.

Bruce felt a hand on his shoulder, and John crept ahead him, the taser-bomb in hand: it looked like a mass of the sticky-bombs grouped together, colorful wiring connecting them all like some kind of net, and before Bruce could do or say anything, John threw it into the living room, where it tumbled into the middle of the floor.

The group began to shoot out of their seats in a second, and in the next the ball seemed to expand like a geometric toy, the wired tasers being thrown in the air with a flash before smacking people and surfaces alike as they discharged. All three people fell to the floor in trembling heaps, and John dashed out and started to cuff them, Bruce close behind.

The electric bombs were safe to touch now that they had fully discharged, so Bruce had no qualm about stomping on the lightly-burning sections of carpet underneath some of them to prevent any spread of fire as he pushed them aside. The bulkiest goon wasn’t quite down for the count; she was still conscious.

She yanked John off her fallen comrade by his shoulder and threw him into the table’s edge. Bruce threw a Batarang at her arm just as she was about to punch, and John gave a swift knee to her stomach as she flinched.

She fell to the floor with a louder crash and a grunt, pulling the Batarang out from her arm and letting it drop to the floor. “You fucker…” She said, glaring up at John before looking over at Bruce, her eyes widening as he approached with more Batarangs at the ready. “B-Batman…?”

“Yup! He’s real,” John said playfully before smacking the side of her head with the baton. “And so am I,” he added with a growl. He decided to tie her wrists behind the nearest table leg. “I hate not being able to call myself Joker like this… Really sells it better.”

Bruce felt his heart twitch at the name. “You can call yourself that, if it helps,” Bruce said gently, tying the monitoring-station woman’s wrists together, “Just not to people’s faces.”

“Kinda defeats the point,” John grumbled.

Bruce shot a look at the security monitor – Pamela Isley didn’t seem to have heard anything. Still, precaution should be used. “Let’s go,” he said plainly, sweeping out of the room with a swish of his cape.

John tucked a hand into his pocket and followed.

The basement stairs were carpeted and quiet, but Bruce was careful to walk on the outsides rather than the middle. Spiders had clearly made themselves right at home in the damp corners of the walls, and he had to duck to avoid getting the tips of his cowl’s ears stuck in one of their webs. A soft sort of click was heard behind his back, and Bruce figured John had gotten out his grappling gun.

Pamela Isley was bent over a row of exotic-looking orchids posed under heat lamps, dabbing something into the center of a blue orchid’s petals. Bruce saw several troughs full of hallucinogenic mushrooms sitting on the other side of the wall.

“There you go, my darling,” she cooed in a honeyed voice, acting like she was carefully painting the center of the flower, “You’ll soon be the belle of the ball…”

Bruce eyed the electrical box on the other side of the room. It wouldn’t do to drown the place in darkness; he’d be able to see, but John wouldn’t. The best bet was to tackle and restrain her.

Or…

Bruce took out his own grappling gun, and aimed it at Isley’s collar. One click, and it snagged her shirt with practiced ease.

“What the-?!”

Pamela Isley was suddenly dragged yelping through the air at an angle, smacking hard into one of the tables and spilling several unusual potted flowers to the floor.

Bruce grabbed her and threw her to the concrete floor, standing over her with several Batarangs in his hand as John cackled beside him.

“Jonathan Crane,” Bruce growled out, “Where is he?”

Pamela Isley sat up, shock written all over her face as she processed exactly what happened – it quickly morphed to a steely stare. “Batman,” she said slowly in a sweet voice, “I thought you were an urban legend,” she continued, wiping the corner of her mouth where a dribble of blood leaked out. “Do you always treat a lady this way?”

Bruce dragged her up by her collar and threw her against the wall, keeping her at arm’s length. “I know he bought plants from you today. Tell me where he is.”

“Or what?” She taunted, smirking widely at him. “You think I haven’t been knocked around by men before? I’ve been in whole worlds of hurt, honey.”

There was the distinct sound of the grappling wire rushing through the air, and then an enormous crash – John had taken out one of the mushroom tables, the fungi now breaking and bouncing against the floor it the scattered in the dirt.

“Whoopsie,” John hummed, a wide unnerving grin on his face, “butter-fingers.”

Isley looked rather taken aback, but the expression quickly warped into a mocking glare. “You think destroying my inventory is going to intimidate me?”

John shrugged, leaning back against a table and knocking over a several small tropical plants with a slide of his hand, shattering the clay pots and sending the plants scattering to the hard floor.

That definitely got her attention; her face paled slightly and there was tremble in her. “Stop that!”

Bruce glared at her, mentally thanking John for his quick thinking. “Tell me where Crane is and I’ll consider stopping him from tearing this place apart.”

Her dark green eyes glared at him with a slow-boiling dislike. “Let me go first.”

Bruce did a very quick once-over; she didn’t seem to have a gun holster on her, and she was definitely a lighter build than the rest of her gang. Knives were still a possibility. He decided to let go, keeping a Batarang between his fingers just in case as he stepped just out of her reach.

Pamela dusted off her green turtleneck. “I don’t know where he is, and I don’t care. He bought a few of my flowers and left,” she said, crossing her arms.

John laughed, fingering the leaves of the blue orchid she’d been attending. “With a hole in his shoulder? You didn’t even offer a band-aid for that?”

Pamela was closely eyeing the plant in John’s hand. “What if I did?”

“I know he’s a friend of yours, Isley,” Bruce growled. “You’re the only one who could know what he’s planning.”

“I told you, I don’t know,” she stated, “and I don’t care. I’m not his mother.”

“I can see why you were paying such close attention to this one,” John hummed, fingering the petals with a gloved hand. “It’s so pretty. You put a lot of effort into keeping all these, huh?” He grinned at her, almost looking like his usual self. “It’s not just some financial scheme for you, is it?”

“Of course it is,” Pamela stared at him, trying to keep her voice level; Bruce noticed her eyes kept flicking slightly downward, like she was watching the plant. “I breed and sell rare plants to collectors on the side.”

“Oh good! So this won’t bother you!”

In a swift move, John cut the blossom off the stem with the bowie knife one of the group upstairs had been sharpening.

The blossom fell to the table, and Pamela Isley looked as if she’d seen a ghost.

John picked up the blossom. “Let’s see – she’s honest,” he said playfully, plucking a petal from the stem, “she’s not!” He pulled another.

“STOP IT!” Pamela shrieked, making to rush at him – Bruce pulled her back and pointed the tip of the Batarang at her face. She glanced at it fearfully, but then looked back at the flower being torn apart in John’s hand, and it looked like she was watching a child die before her eyes.

“Stop that,” Bruce instructed; John hummed and held it still. “Talk, or my partner and I crush every plant in this place.”

Isley stared at the flower in John’s hand. “I… I don’t know what he’s planning,” she said quietly, her voice cracking slightly. John only touched the tip of a petal before she spoke again – “But-! But I know… He’s building something. He didn’t say what, but he asked for some muscle - I hooked him up with some of Maroni’s old boys.” She shut her eyes and took a breath before glaring at John like he was a complete monster. “I hope the lot of them tears you limb from limb.”

Bruce forced Isley’s hands behind her back and zip-tied them. “Down on the ground,” he growled, pushing down on the top of her head. John pointed the grappling gun in her face with a smirk; a good insurance if she decided to try and elbow Bruce in the face.

Pamela shot them both a hateful glare as she knelt down, and it didn’t waver as her ankles were tied, too. “I won’t forget this,” she spat.

Bruce sent off a message to Tiffany regarding the coordinates of “Poison Ivy”’s headquarters from his gauntlet. He knew she’d get the word out before he could even get back in the car. “Tell it to the judge,” he taunted, leading the way out of the basement, not missing the sparkle in John’s eyes as he followed, the severed, torn orchid blossom having been carelessly thrown at Pamela Isley’s feet.

John gathered up the sticky bomb device before they hustled back to the Batmobile, and it wasn’t until the doors closed that he spoke, and when he did it was in a tone Bruce would almost call revered.

“So, what do we do now, partner?” He asked, a definite glow on his face.

“We go look at some of the Maroni gang’s old haunts and see if we can find anyone recently hired,” Bruce said, the voice modifier in his cowl now disabled. He glanced at his recent text messages: one from Tiffany giving the ok on Poison Ivy, and another from Iman with the last known location of the stolen Ryde car. “After we look into the motels in the red-light district. Crane might’ve stayed there.”

John laughed to himself, but for once he didn’t share the joke; instead, he pulled out a packet of jerky from the plastic bag he’d brought along. “I knew this would be a long night,” he said cheerfully, as if he was really looking forward to the whole thing.

It was well past one in the morning when Bruce arrived back home through the front gate, the Batsuit stowed away and the plates flipped back to red. The two patrol officers were only somewhat surprised to see him arrive back. Naturally, they reported nothing new, since John had been dropped off in the Batcave first.

Sore muscles were nothing new to Bruce. The old strained climb back up to his bed was just as annoying as ever. He honestly didn’t feel like he wanted to sleep, but after following several empty leads over the city and bruising a few heads alongside John, he did admit that he was physically exhausted. He knew lying down was better than nothing, and he still had to go to work in several hours like he didn’t have a double life. At least he wasn't starving, thanks to John thinking ahead and buying him protein-and-carb-filled snacks.

He forced himself to go through his usual nightly routine, despite the temptation to just flop into bed and lay there. He looked at the bruises on his back and ribs from where John had struggled against him under the influence of Crane’s drug, and decided not to bother putting the bruise-away cream on them, nor on the new ones forming on his shoulder from where one of the former mobsters had hit him.

When he did finally collapse onto the master bed in nothing but his boxer-briefs, his brain still decided to chat away at him.

There were no leads as to who exactly Isley had hired for Crane. Bruce cursed himself for not trying to work the specifics out of her. At least he knew she was arrested for drug possession and manufacturing, as well as smuggling illegal fauna.

There was no word on the whereabouts of Jackie Lant. Her car was missing, and she’d called into work sick. Her apartment hadn’t been visited in the entire time Bruce had his drone’s eye on it, and neither Tiffany nor Iman had seen anything when they looked into Jackie’s friends’ places, either. All Bruce knew was that she hadn’t called an ambulance to fetch her from Toxic Acres, that she hadn’t been admitted to a hospital, and that there was no sign of her body either in the Acres or in the Gotham River.

She was alive, somewhere, and Bruce didn’t know what she was going to do next. He hoped she was just going to lie low until he caught Crane.

Jonathan Crane was nowhere to be found. His house was still empty. He didn’t seem to be staying at any of the motels – or hotels – around the red-light district or its surrounding streets, and nothing had come of a quick credit-card check. The Ryde driver the GCPD fished out of the River that morning had been shot in the head, and his car was so common that if Crane could’ve switched the license plate with anything and been completely invisible. They’d done a quick search of the warehouse district and found no sign of him there, either.

Bruce had the nagging feeling that he wasn’t going to find Crane until the doctor reared his head.

The billionaire rolled onto his stomach, shoving the anxious thought away as he pressed his cheek further into the plush black jersey pillowcase. There were a couple more places he could check tomorrow…

The bedroom door creaked, and Bruce’s eyes shot open, a second away from grabbing the billy-club under his pillow – he could see John’s messy hair in his dark silhouette.

“Bruce? You awake?”

“Yeah,” he mumbled.

“…can I come in?”

“Sure.”

Bruce noticed he closed the door behind him. Like he was planning to stay there.

That definitely put a new light onto the situation. A tense thrill was building in his shoulders as John deigned to sit on the edge of the mattress, his back to Bruce.

John was only wearing his Arkham-regulated pants, and the pale white of his bare skin almost shone in the light streaming in from the window. Bruce saw several bruises forming, one of which was from where he’d gotten grabbed by the shoulder by a Poison Ivy goon, and several more where he’d gotten knocked into.

“…I don’t think I can sleep in that guest room,” John sighed. “I mean, I tried my usual methods of sleep induction, but… It’s too big…and empty. I’m really not used to that.” His voice came out quieter and more contemplative. “I know it’s weird, but do you mind if I sleep in here?” He asked, turning halfway to look right at Bruce.

He felt trapped. If he said no, at the worst John would sulk, and at the best John wouldn’t get any sleep, and that was definitely worse for his mental health. John had mentioned before about how regular sleep cycles were supposed to help with that.

If he said yes, though, he’d know he was sleeping next to John, and there was the tiny worry in the back of his head that John might…try something. Or at least roll over too much.

“I promise I’ll stay over on my side,” John muttered, not tearing his eyes away.

“Alright.”

A sweet smile stretched on his face. “Thanks, Bruce. You won’t regret this.”

“If you keep talking, I might.”

John giggled as he slid beneath the covers on the far side of the bed, flopping one of the extra pillows down between them. “There – a no-roll barrier,” he said as if he had to explain the concept to Bruce.

It did not escape Bruce’s attention that John had decided to lie facing him and rest his arm on top of the pillow. John had pulled the covers up to just underneath his armpits; Bruce could see John's sharp collarbone and the lean wiry muscle of his chest. (Bruce made sure not to look for more than a moment's curiosity would allow.)

God, John’s face was actually his for the first time that whole night. Bruce had gotten used to seeing it in the natural makeup, but it was almost a relief to see it in its normal borderline-luminescent white. He looked like the man Bruce knew.

Acid-green eyes stared at him, flicking slightly and growing soft. “I…did want to talk to you about something, though. If it’s okay.”

“I suppose I’m still awake,” Bruce said in an attempt to lighten the tension in his arms. “Sure.”

“Do you ever…look back on something, and think about the worst thing that could’ve happened in that situation?”

He didn’t like to admit it, but he had. Usually in his worst moods, he’d think about how everything could’ve gone wrong. He’d usually think about everything he could’ve done better, too. “I try not to, but…sometimes, yeah.”

“I’ve been thinking about our fight a lot, lately,” John confessed, “At Ace. I used to think about it a lot when I got recommitted, but… You started visiting me,” he said softly, a light smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “You remember when I told you I thought I’d messed things up for us?”

“Yeah.” It was Bruce’s first visit to John. He never forgot the sheer hopeful joy on John’s face upon seeing him. It was practically engraved in his memory.

“Ever since I started sessions with Crane, I kept going back to that night. He always tried to weasel my worst secrets out of me,” he said with a low scowl, “but when he started using that…toxin on me… I kept…thinking about what could have happened back there. I… I know I almost killed you.”

The sheer pain reading in John’s eyes was enough to make Bruce want to wrap his arms around him. It was beautiful and raw and honest, and Bruce found himself holding stock still, almost captivated by the expression.

“I kept seeing it. Over and over – it was like I could see myself throwing you over the railing or-or stabbing you, or...” Bruce saw tears welling up as John clenched the pillow between them. “I don’t want to come close to that again, Bruce,” he managed to say, his voice starting to hitch. “I don’t… I don’t want to kill you.”

Bruce threw his pride away and grabbed John’s hand in his. “You won’t.”

“You…you don’t know that,” John said with a light sob. “If…if I…go back to how I was… If I mess up...”

Bruce squeezed his hand, feeling the soft skin twitch under his fingertips. “I won’t pretend you’re perfect,” he said, honesty seeping through every word, “but I know you, John. I know you’re not going after Crane out of revenge, like you did with Waller. You reached out to me for help – but you were already trying to find a way to stop him without resorting to just stabbing him with the nearest shiv.”

John sniffed, a tiny twitch at the corner of his mouth like he was almost smiling. “Yeah…”

“So you’re not the same person you were then, are you?” He soothed with a supportive smile. “Even if you feel you are going backward, I know it won’t be to that same point.”

“Maybe…” he said with another sniff, looking more serious. “But Bruce, you know there are things I can’t ever really stop, right? The auditory psychosis is pretty much going to stay with me the rest of my life,” he started, clutching Bruce’s hand back, “and I’m not going to lie here and pretend my pulse wasn’t pounding a mile a minute when we were fighting those mobsters out there.” He sported a small knowing grin at him. “You know what that’s like, though, don’t you…”

(Yes, he did.)

“…you know what’s funny? I used to think one bad day could turn a person completely upside down.” John managed to stroke his thumb against Bruce’s knuckle, sending a little shiver over the skin, and Bruce wondered if John knew how incredibly intimate that gesture felt as he stared softly at him from the pillow. “Especially after Waller came to town… But…I never really thought things could go back up after it. I guess it just…takes a while.”

Bruce knew there was something right in John’s line of thinking. It only took one day to turn his life on its head, and he felt he knew, despite John having no memory of his life before Arkham, that something similar had happened to him. “Well…they say time heals all wounds.”

“How much passed before yours started to heal?”

He almost didn’t want to answer. The truth was that he wasn’t sure at all if he was ever going to fully heal, despite knowing what his parent’s really were. Maybe it was because he knew the terrible truth about them that they wouldn’t ever heal right. Maybe he’d always have that miserable note in the background of his life.

“…I’m still healing.”

“I didn’t say you stopped, buddy,” John chuckled with a knowing look. “Still…got good days and bad days, huh?”

“Feels like it, yeah.” Today…was definitely more of a mixed day. Looking at John across from him, though, all honest and open, and thinking back to how it felt to fight alongside him again, and investigate with him, with that warmth and instant familiar comfort between that never faded away, he almost felt like he wanted to call it a good day. “Today might have tilted things right-side up.”

John laughed, a genuine, humored one that was almost infectious. “Now I know I’m rubbing off on you; that sounds like something I’d say!”

John slipped his hand away and turned to lie on his back, still chuckling to himself. The warmth still burned in Bruce’s palm, and he found himself reluctant to pull his hand away at all.

John turned to him once more, an all-too-familiar affection shimmering brightly in the green depths. It pulled Bruce in and made him feel like he should inch close enough to feel the warmth and security it promised. “’Night, Bruce.”

“Goodnight, John.”

John turned over, leaving Bruce to stare at the bruises forming on his shoulders. There was the terrible temptation in his hands to shove the pillow between them aside and wrap his arm around the man’s middle so he could lean into that pale, battered back and bury his face in a head of soft, green hair.

There was a worse urge, one so vivid it almost made Bruce’s head spin – he could just reach out and touch the bruises, feather-light, and trail his fingertips down the curve of spine until it arched with a pleased shudder, and Bruce could follow that trail with his mouth as far as John would let him.

Bruce turned his head away, the memory of John’s lips on his coming to the front of his mind, and he shut out the mental image of repeating that kiss right then and there, telling himself that he really shouldn’t feel that way towards someone who desperately needed support, nor to his best friend who he’d left scarred in more ways than one, and certainly not someone who was both.

It had been a long time since Bruce shared a bed with someone, and far, far longer when he shared one with someone he didn’t have sex with.

He hoped that was all it was. Just the bed’s memory getting to him, and nothing else…

Notes: Super-sexy-plant-person-in-her-late-twenties Ivy is OUT. Cougar-aged-mobster-botanist Ivy is IN! >:)

I really wanted a different Ivy. I’m tired of the young, uber-sexy walking plant-human-hybrid that’s immune to all toxins and diseases; plants get diseases, too, and she’s so plant-like she should have some kind of physical humanizing weakness! It’s much more interesting to have a human who’s just built up an immunity and uses her babies for weapons and business; I kept her serious environmentalist trait, though, because while I dislike the anti-hero thing she’s got going on lately and would love to see her as a straight-up villain again, we do have to relate to her somehow, and her love of nature is always going to be a good part of her. Since Harley’s older, too, I figured it would be alright if they had a ten-year gap between them, so when Pam eventually goes to Black Gate one day, they’ll be pals. ;)

And Bruce you complete fool!!!! You should’ve kissed him!!! Why do you do this to yourseellllfff? D:

I'm sorry it took so long, but as you can tell, I had a lot to work on, and I’m doing my best to write the next chapter as quickly as I can while this nutty energy in my brain is still fresh. I’m trying to keep with my weekly schedule, but I hope you guys are okay with having a gap day, as appears to be the habit now. ( ._. ) I mean, no one yells at me or anything for being late, but I aim to please with my work, and part of that is being consistent.

I shall continue to try my hardest! (*｀へ´*) 彡3 See you next weekend!!!

#batjokes #telltale batjokes #juce #atbom #at the brink of midnight #fordarkisthesuede writes #I had a lot of fun coming up with a different ivy!#i like the idea that she heads her own gang despite being rather anti-people #like she doesn't even consider them when the JUCE force shows up #then again goons are rather expendable in the batman universes aren't they?#i can't believe i worked in a nod to TFS's playthroughs of TT bats #i still laugh when i rewatch the first season and they just let Selina drop #all because they were curious to see what would happen #so will ivy's info have an impact on future events?#only time will tell.........#also i'm serious about those writer vibes #i'm sending 'em all out #you'll all do great this week i can feel it #p.s. the ao3 chapters are already edited properly so i'll fix the tumblr ones asap

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royal-skies · 6 years ago

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i rlly thought i was going crazy but thank fuck im not just yet. you see, some time ago like 3 years i think, i was sitting all nice in my balcony some time during the night (most definitely after midnight) when suddenly i hear these like, flutes or recorders or whatever the loving fuck you call these in english.

i heard like a bunch of these being played at the same time but not in symphony. oh no, it sounded as if some people just grabbed them and randomly blew into them, not caring how it sounded. it went on for easy ten min. tbh i do not think i can even begin to describe it in only english.

being so late it was so scary i went back inside, not rlly thinking much of it. i wish i was kidding, the day after some creepy shit started happening in my house every now and then that even this year it hasn’t rlly subsided. for some reason i always correlated it but i could just be a bit paranoid.

for some time and for some reason i really though i imagined it. but oh god. ohhhhh fuck. three years later i fucking heard it again, going on for and hour. and i managed to catch it on video.

the audio is a bit odd, but keep in mind it was around midnight and i had spent a good thirty minutes thinking i was imagining stuff. its been three years since i heard it and i so do not care how this is redacted or shit bc i am definitely freaked out rn

#this def feels like some curse or some shitblike that #pls tell me you hear the same stuff #it had been going on for sonlong #it stopped not too long ago tho #but i am so crepped out #fuck #video #creepy #scary #scary stuff #scary video #creepy video #creepy stuff #idk if i even want to attract attention to this #i just need to know of someone hears the same stupid flutes

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callunavulgari · 7 years ago

Text

Scrapbook 2018 - Pt. II

Second part of the scrapbook for 2018. A reminder, for myself and others-

Italicized titles - enjoyed quite a bit | bold titles - love | titles with an asterisk* - all time favorites | (bracketed titles) - re-watches/re-reads | strikethough - dislike

Goals are: read forty-five new books this year (34 so far!), finish six video games (2 so far!), write either 30 fics or 70k total, finish the damn Sabriel AU (not so much), and write something original.

MOVIES

June

Solo

Professor Marston and the Wonder Women

(Coco)

(The Lost Boys)

(Road to El Dorado)

(Avatar)

The Philadelphia Story

Singin’ In The Rain

Incredibles 2

Funny Girl

High Society

Blade Runner 2049

Moonlight

Ocean’s 8

July

Ant Man and the Wasp

Lego Batman Movie

Good Morning Vietnam

Mary and the Witch’s Flower

(Coraline)

August

(Hercules)

(Wonder Woman)

(Coraline)

Flavors of Youth

September

(Song of the Sea)

The Losers

The Greatest Showman

October

(Jurassic Park)

(LOTR: The Fellowship of the Ring)

November

(V For Vendetta)\

(Serenity)

To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before

December

Wreck It Ralph 2

(Howl’s Moving Castle)

Ready Player One

Home Alone 2

BOOKS

June

The Stand | Stephen King

Think of England | K.J. Charles [Fin]

Reincarnation Blues | Michael Poore [Fin]

Voyage of the Basilisk | Marie Brennan [Fin]

Wishful Drinking | Carrie Fisher [Fin]

(Captive Prince | C.S. Pacat) [Fin]

(Prince’s Gambit | C.S. Pacat) [Fin]

(King’s Rising | C.S. Pacat) [Fin]

The Fifth Season | N.K. Jesmin [Fin]

The Power | Naomi Alderman [Fin]

July

The Stand | Stephen King [Fin]

King of Attolia | Megan Whalen Turner [Fin]

Conspiracy of Kings | Megan Whalen Turner [Fin]

The Ocean at the End of the Lane | Neil Gaiman [Fin]

Postcards From the Edge | Carrie Fisher [Fin]

A Closed and Common Orbit | Becky Chambers [Fin]

The Wicked + The Divine, Vol. 1 | Kieron Gillen [Fin]

The Wicked + The Divine, Vol. 2 | Kieron Gillen [Fin]

The Wicked + The Divine, Vol. 3 | Kieron Gillen [Fin]

The Watchmaker of Filigree Street | Natasha Pulley [Fin]

Half Bad | Sally Green [Fin]

Spinning Silver | Naomi Novak [Fin]***

(Uprooted)** [Fin]

The Bedlam Stacks | Natasha Pulley [Fin]

If We Were Villains | M.L. Rio [Fin]

Circe | Madelline Miller [Fin]

Lord of the Flies | William Golding [Fin]

The Goldfinch | Donna Tartt

The Obelisk Gate | N.K. Jesmin [Fin]

(His Majesty’s Dragon | Naomi Novak)

August

The Goldfinch | Donna Tartt [Fin]

(His Majesty’s Dragon | Naomi Novak) [Fin]

Pachinko | Min Jin Lee [Fin]

The Cruel Prince | Holly Black [Fin]

Thick As Thieves | Megan Whalen Turner [Fin]

The Language of Thorns | Leigh Bardugo [Fin]

Salt Magic, Skin Magic | Lee Welch [Fin]

Red Queen | Victoria Aveyard [Fin]

Record of a Spaceborn Few | Becky Chambers [Fin]

The Labyrinth of Drakes | Marie Brennan [Fin]

The Stone Sky | N.K. Jesmin

Luck In The Shadows | Lynn Flewelling

September

The Stone Sky | N.K. Jesmin [Fin]

Luck In The Shadows | Lynn Flewelling [Fin]

Stalking Darkness | Lynn Flewelling [Fin]

Within the Sanctuary of Wings | Marie Brennan [Fin]

Traitor’s Moon | Lynn Flewelling [Fin]

Shadow’s Return | Lynn Flewelling [Fin]

When Breath Becomes Air | Paul Kalanithi

The White Road | Lynn Flewelling [Fin]

Casket of Souls | Lynn Flewelling [Fin]

Shards of Time | Lynn Flewelling [Fin]

The Name of the Wind | Patrick Rothfuss

October

The Name of the Wind | Patrick Rothfuss [Fin]

When Breath Becomes Air | Paul Kalanithi [Fin]

Little Fires Everywhere | Celeste Ng [Fin]

Titus Groan | Meryn Peake [DNF]

The Fellowship of the Ring | J.R.R. Tolkien

Howl’s Moving Castle | Diana Wyyne Jones

The Wise Man’s Fear | Patrick Rothfuss

November

The Fellowship of the Ring | J.R.R. Tolkien [Fin]

Howl’s Moving Castle | Diana Wyyne Jones

The Wise Man’s Fear | Patrick Rothfuss [Fin]

December

Howl’s Moving Castle | Diana Wyyne Jones [Fin]

Ender’s Game | Orson Scott Card

The Poppy War | R.F. Kuang

PODCASTS

June

Wolf 359 (Eps 49-61) FIN

The Bright Sessions (56 - Finale) FIN

Penumbra Podcast (1-32)

Alice Isn’t Dead (5-6)

July

Penumbra Podcast (32)

August

Penumbra Podcast (ALL OF IT)

September

EOS 10 (Rewatch of s1 & 2, then 1-5 of s3)

Welcome to Night Vale (1-26)

October

EOS 10 (s3; eps 5-FINALE, bonus episode)

Welcome to Night Vale (26)

November

Welcome to Night Vale (26-29)

Wolf 359 RELISTEN (1-34)

Penumbra Podcast (Juno Steel and the Long Way Home pt 1-2)

TANIS 1

December

Wolf 359 RELISTEN (34-62)

TV SHOWS BY SEASON

June

Westworld s2

Legion s2

The Flash s4

Siren s1

Sense8 Series Finale*****

Black Mirror

Voltron s6

July

The Bold Type s1

Anne With An E s1

Black Mirror

Big Mouth

August

Anne With An E s2

Legion s2

The Flash s4

Voltron s7

San Clarita Diet

Jeff Jeffries

September

American Horror Story: Apocalypse

Killing Eve

The Dragon Prince

Castlevania

October

American Horror Story: Apocalypse

Killing Eve

The Haunting of Hill House

The Good Place s2

Castlevania s2

November

The Good Place s2

Castlevania s2

American Horror Story: Apocalypse

Killing Eve

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina

She Ra s1

December

(Dead Like Me)

(Buffy the Vampire Slayer s4)

VIDEO GAMES

June

Witcher 3: Hearts of Stone DLC - 2 hrs

Song of the Deep

(Final Fantasy 15) - 30 hrs

July

Witcher 3: Hearts of Stone DLC - 2 hrs

SOMA [Fin]

(Kingdom Hearts Final Mix) - 34 hrs [Fin]

Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days - Remix [Fin]

(Kingdom Hearts 2 Final Mix) - 40 hrs

August

(Kingdom Hearts 2 Final Mix) - 40 hrs [Fin]

Kingdom Hearts BBS, Terra - 20 hrs [Fin]

Kingdom Hearts BBS, Ven - 5 hrs

Prey, M Morgan - 30 hrs [Fin]

Prey, F Morgan - 6 hrs

September

(Final Fantasy 15) - 100 hrs

Witcher 3: Hearts of Stone DLC - 6 hrs

October

(Final Fantasy 15) - 100 hrs

Witcher 3: Hearts of Stone DLC - 6 hrs

Kingdom Hearts BBS, Ven - 12 hrs [Fin]

Kingdom Hearts BBS, Aqua - 5 hrs

November

Kingdom Hearts BBS, Aqua - 5 hrs

Pokemon Go?

December

Pokemon Moon (34 hrs, Ghost trial?)

Pokemon Go

(Kingdom Hearts: DDD - La Cite de Cloches, 5 hrs?)

Pokemon Let’s Go Eevee

Detroit: Become Human

DELIGHTFUL FIC

June

take the stage and deliver by mothwrites | Wolf 359 | Jacobi/Kepler | 3k | “Why me?” Jacobi asked.“You’re just his type,” Cutter said. “He’ll never see it coming.”

push to the limit by gortysproject | Wolf 359 | Jacobi/Kepler | 10k | five times kepler asks too much of jacobi, and one time jacobi can't pull through for him.

you be the motor, I'll be the gasoline by crookedfingers | Wolf 359 | Jacobi/Kepler | 5k | The hold music begins before Jacobi can finish his sentence. He blinks at the far wall and then glances at a clock. He’ll give it thirty seconds before he hangs up.Then the music stops jarringly mid-note and someone says, “Thank you so much for your patience. I understand that you’re seeking career opportunities with Goddard Futuristics.”

life 2.0 by goldtreesilvertree, mothwrites | Wolf 359 | Jacobi/Eiffel | 5k | "Alright... Daniel. Why are we having a movie night?" Minkowski never seemed the type to be into movie nights, and Hera probably doesn't get the point. He's beginning to get the feeling this will be the first movie night Eiffel 2.0 is going to remember, and he doesn't know if that's a good thing."Because," Daniel says, passing him a DVD so he has to get up again, "I really want to watch this, and my usual movie-buddy is dead. My backup movie-buddy is also dead. Any further questions?"

'til your heart goes numb by LuckyDiceKirby | The Bright Sessions | Mark/Damien | 1k | Instead of going out and getting drunk with Rose, Mark goes for a drive.

black sheep and mischief by grim_lupine | Thor | Thor & Loki | 3k | A bird alights on Thor’s shoulder and pecks his cheek twice, hard enough to make him wince.“What are you doing?” it warbles in his ear.“Wondering what my brother is doing up at this hour, little bird,” Thor replies. “Will you go ask him for me?”

(Lines on Palms by Fahye | Captive Prince | Damen/Laurent | 35k | "You're lying," Damen says. "You walked into Akielos and stole something from me.")**

On Tilt by 13th_blackbird | Solo | Han/Lando | 3k | “You want to play?” Han says, nodding at the cards, before he can think better of it. “Or are you just showing off?”

tell me, get my shit together by paperclipbitch | Solo | Han/Lando | 5k | “I thought we were actively avoiding each other after the Trandosha Shitshow,” Han says.“We’re actively avoiding each other after the Iridonia Shitshow,” Lando corrects him, “the Trandosha Shitshow is That Which We Do Not Speak Of.”

Make Me Feel by Copper_Nails (Her_Madjesty) | Solo | Han/Lando | 2k | Winning the Falcon back is supposed to fill the empty space beneath his ribs. Han told himself this the whole way to Lando, tells it to himself again, now: it’s immensely satisfying to stare up at the ship’s sleek (battered) lines, so he can stop thinking about Crimson Dawn, thanks; can stop thinking about Beckett on the cliffside and Qi’ra, fading like a star in the morning.

Proving It by sailingonstardust | Solo | Han/Lando | 1.5k | “You know,” Lando interrupts Han in the middle of a story about a seedy club and two twi’leks, “you can talk, and talk, and talk, but I don’t believe half the things you’re saying for even a second.”

one night on the falcon by topaz | Solo | Han/Lando | 3k | If Han was the kind of guy who thought about things like this, the idea of fucking Lando Calrissian in the ship he'd used to own would have fallen somewhere on the Cool side of the prospective ideas spectrum, probably shading to the Not really likely to happen but still fun to think about group.

A Cornstalk Fiddle by notbecauseofvictories | Devil Went Down to Georgia | Devil/Johnny | 9k+ | Where Johnny goes, the Devil follows; where Johnny goes, the Devil is already there.

The Beginning After the End by notbecauseofvictories | Star Wars | Padme & Obi-Wan | 7k | Padmé wakes to the back of Obi-Wan’s head, his hair mussed and his arms spread, outstretched over her knees as though to shield her from all that would come.

( Stargazers by Ruby_Wednesday | Captive Prince | Laurent/Damen | 90k | Five years after the Truce of Marlas, Damen and Laurent meet again in Delpha. They're forced to work together to soothe the growing tension between their countries. But Laurent does not forgive easily and Damen's not that sorry.)

( One the Other by Ruby_Wednesday | Captive Prince | Laurent/Damen | 200k | Marlas goes badly for Damen. He goes back to Ios with Laurent as his reluctant ward.)

July

Any More Obvious by idiopathicsmile | Les Mis | Eponine/Cosette | 2k | “Look, folks,” says Musichetta, ten minutes from the end of cheer practice, “we have an audience. A spooky audience.”

speak in tongues by SpineAndSpite | Yuri On Ice | Yuri/Otabek | 7k | The last time Yuri went sightseeing with Otabek it had been the middle of winter, and he only had breath to contemplate the speed of the bike and the warmth of Otabek through his jacket. A crowded bus is a far cry, but he still has the same feeling of displacement--of not knowing what will happen next.

cherry pie by brawlite, ToAStranger | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 133k | Billy Hargrove lives for summer. Endless sunshine, heavily chlorinated pools, roaming ice cream trucks, and unencumbered freedom? There’s nothing better.**

(you hate me) cause i got what you need by brawlite, ToAStranger | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 6k | “You smell like coconuts,” Billy murmurs. “Like the ocean, too.”

Draconia by perceived_nobility | The Bright Sessions | Damien/Mark | 4k | "So I was driving. One ex wife and one ex husband later, stopping at the same fucking gas stations you and I stopped at."

untalked of and unseen by prouvairing | If We Were Villains | James/Oliver | 5k | Four times Oliver and James slept together, and one time they didn’t. Not exactly in that order.

Swipe right by mee4ever | HP | Draco/Harry | 2k | Or then one where Harry swipes right, and it turns out Draco does too.

The Truth by mee4ever | HP | Draco/Harry | 4k | Or the one where Harry is too bloody thick to see the truth, even when it's staring him in the face.

August

Victory Condition by astolat | Transformers | Megatron/Optimus | 39k | “Do you want me to tell you a story?” Megatron said mockingly. “You won’t like it, Prime. It’s not a very nice one.”

chases, escapes, true love, miracles by pepperfield | The Flash | Cisco/Harry | 55k | Just because the timeline has been restored, doesn't mean things are back to normal. Cisco's got 99 problems, and Harry Wells is approximately 38 of them.

Turn by Ever-so-reylo (Ever_So_Reylo) | Star Wars | Reylo | 9k | I would kill for you, he thinks at her, inside her, and this is the result of what they just did, the culmination of all of their history together. I would destroy the entire galaxy for this.

You should see the things we do by Ever-so-reylo (Ever_So_Reylo) | SW | Reylo | 13k | “Maybe Ben will come home from his business trip and bend me over the nearest piece of furniture and fuck me hard and fast.”

Your Pretty Little Heart by Ever-so-reylo (Ever_So_Reylo) | SW | Reylo | 64k | “Good. Good little Omega.” He says the words against her gland, almost sweetly, and Rey—Rey is going to die. A wonderful, delicious death. Depraved, all of this. Filthy. Beautiful.

✓✓ Read by Boyue | South Park | Kyle/Stan | 65k | AKA how Stan Marsh met Kyle Broflovski through a dick pic mishap.

Pretend There Is No Wreck by LuckyDiceKirby | The Flash | Harrisco | 11k | Cisco and Harry figure out how to not kill each other, and also maybe how to talk about their feelings.

the cure by aquaexplicit | The Flash | Harrisco | 43k | “I guess I don’t really get what you need to fix? Harrison Wells is a hot, rich genius that pays you to make cool stuff with his daughter and is totally into you. If you guys boning is the biggest problem you have, I think this officially qualifies as your best relationship ever.”

and everything nice by perzimon | Voltron | Sheith | 5k | when he's beautiful and you love him but he can't make toast, the fic

hello, i love you, won't you tell me your name by perzimon | Voltron | Sheith | 12k | Keith's human enough to have wisdom teeth and unlucky enough to need them extracted. The team despairs.

Unexpected Developments by mific | SGA | McShep | 14k | Detective John Sheppard after Vegas (S5E19). His near-fatal wound's slowly healing and he's got his old job back, but then someone turns up unexpectedly who's a greater mystery than any of the cases on John's desk, and John has to make some hard choices.

teach me something new by tagteamme | Voltron | Sheith | 64k | Keith and Lance accidentally get into trouble. Shiro is the TA that has to Deal With It™.

to go, to follow, to kneel at your feet by arahir | Voltron | Sheith | 12k | They think it will be funny to leave him with a Galra in heat.

called out your name (but it was too late) by arahir | Voltron | Sheith, Griffin/Keith | 5k | Walk into the Garrison like—wait, what the fuck, is that Keith? Or: an old classmate watches Keith fall in love with someone else.

To Consummate is to Burn by the_glow_worm | Spinning Silver | Miryem/The Staryk | 6k | Miryem, the Staryk, and their wedding night.

The Time-Traveller's Portion by PutItBriefly | Pride & Prejudice | Elizabeth/Darcy | 7k | Darcy always knew she was to be his wife. He just didn't know she was poor.

September

songs about love by sarahyyy | YOI | Yuri/Otabek | 8k | In the embedded Instagram photo just under that subheading, a very grumpy Yuri is cuddling a very grumpy-looking cat. The caption reads: I found the cat version of me at the shelter today. #iknowisaidnomorecats #canyoublameme

Between the Lines by Dementordelta | Harry Potter | Snarry | 22k | Harry discovers a secret in his Potions text and a friend in the Half-Blood Prince.

More Than Gravity by JenTheSweetie | Marvel | Stony | 20k | “Aw, time travel, no.”On Christmas Eve, Tony came unstuck in time.

Of an Arcane Binding by Salvia_G | The Hobbit | Thilbo | 44k | An inexplicable magic ties Bilbo Baggins, hobbit of the Shire, to Thorin, dwarven prince of Erebor.

Back and Forth by kiyala | Yuri On Ice | Yuri/Otabek | 4k | Yuri convinces Otabek to get snapchat, just to send selfies of himself making faces at Victor and Yuuri. He gets more than he expected.

your tongue is sharp, but i miss the taste of it by thecopperkid | Stranger Things | Harringrove | 7k | Billy had one job -- don't take off the scarf. / Science is probably not Steve's strong suit, but he's really trying to make sense of why Billy's suddenly found him so appealing.

Things Already Said by balloonwhisk | The Bright Sessions | Damien/Mark | 4k | Damien gets a not entirely unwelcome early morning surprise.

Wreak Havoc by myfandomsareinfinite | EOS 10 | Ryan/Akmazian | 8k | Five Times Ryan Dalias Saved Akmazian's Life (Sort of) and One Time Akmazian Saved Ryan's (Sort Of).

you will see what it is to be overcome by magneticwave | Star Trek | Spirk | 10k | What kind of an idiot would try to explain magic to a Vulcan.

Bloody Ruin by esama | Castlevania | Alucard/Trevor | 37k | Vampire hunter and a vampire try to get along.

Minus 1 by Ever-so-reylo (Ever_So_Reylo) | Star Wars | Reylo | 6k | The text—'What’s up, daddy?'—was originally intended for Finn.

Paint it, red by CeruleanHeart | Stranger Things | Harringrove | 3k | " That's a pretty color..." Billy repeated and stepped closer, crowding Steve against the door "... for a pretty boy."

October

a road less traveled and a life less led by Azzandra | Dishonored | Gen, Outsider & Billie | 9k | She took him out of the Void, as promised.And then she kept him, she supposed.

Changing the Sound of Your Name by Agrotera | Dishonored | Outsider/Corvo | 14k | It was the first thing she said to him when they stumbled out of the Void. You’re going to need a name. Emerging from the dark into what promised to be a lifetime of questions impossible to answer, and she broached the hardest one first.

if the end comes (don't let us hear it) by Kandakicksass | Dishonored | Outsider/Corvo | 5k | "He comes in like a ghost in the fall of 1854."

Work of All Saints by antistar_e (kaikamahine) | Coco | Hector/Imelda/Ernesto | 210k | Imelda Rivera (b. 1899 - d. 1969), a story that includes but is not limited to: the finest music school this side of the Santo Domingo, three traveling musicians and the mess they made of love, the twice-cursed assassination of Venustiano Carranza, all the patron saints, and ninety-six ways a man can try to cross a bridge.**

Traveling Far by astolat | GOT | Jaime/Brienne | 24k | Three weeks into their delightful slog across Westeros, during yet another charming day of shitting in the woods, eating half-raw squirrel, and trudging his feet bloody, the single most dour and uninteresting woman Jaime had ever met in all of Westeros stopped in the middle of a field, drew a deep breath, and said, “When I was seven, my aunt came to visit with her son. My father told me that as the daughter of the house, it was my duty to show hospitality to my guests and to be gracious to them. I wanted to make him proud. So for three weeks, I let my cousin follow me around and talk to me about spiders.”

insert baseball pun here by hoppnhorn | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 6k | He’s considering taking up smoking again if it keeps him from trying to pick up Steve in the middle of the office. That’s really the last thing that he needs to do, start fucking around with someone he works with. He had sex with a coworker one time back in college when he worked at some shitty deli and that had devolved into his manhood being threatened with a meat slicer.

Regrowth by moogle62 | Uprooted | Agnieszka/The Dragon | 1k | Agnieszka’s wood-green cottage stands waiting for her when she leads Sarkan carefully by the hand back home. They wind through the trees together and only she does not flinch at the stray touch of branches. The Wood has known her too completely, now, for her to mistake friend for foe.

I just met you (and this is crazy) by littlesystems | Captain America | Steve/Bucky | 41k | After Steve gets outed by a grainy cell phone picture, it takes the media less than 24 hours to discover Captain America’s secret relationship with James Barnes: classical musician, teen heartthrob, and son of a former president.The only problem? Steve has never met James Barnes in his life.

will you chew until it bleeds? by brawlite | Venom | Venom/Eddie | 7k | Venom drags Eddie into a seedy club out of sheer curiosity. Trying to make the most of a night he didn't choose for himself, Eddie tries to get laid. Instead, he gets mugged. Afterwards, Venom doesn't let Eddie feel too disappointed about the missed opportunity.

devil's backbone by starscry | Castlevania | Alucard/Trevor Belmont | 3k | “Come, now. I’ve seen you stalking around, pent up like a bitch in heat. You’re quite high-strung; it’s beginning to wear on the others, me included,” the vampire drawls. His sharp eyes find Trevor’s, narrowing slyly. “You need a good fuck.”

Steam and Skin by LuciferianRising | Castlevania | Alucard/Trevor | 5k | He wanted to spare Sypha the horror of having to share a bath with either of them, but Trevor never imagined choosing to share it with Alucard would lead to this. He's not exactly complaining, however.

November

when the devil comes to plea (he'll be running quicker than you've ever seen) by Hornswaggler | EOS 10 | Ryan/Akmazian | 3k | Akmazian runs with some pretty shady people. Akmazian is a pretty shady person. Now the Destroyer of Stars has developed something of a soft spot. Not all of his employees approve.

like it's supposed to by Hornswaggler | EOS 10 | Ryan/Akmazian | 2k | Ryan is consistently busy. Luckily for him, that means he's consistently distracted from things he'd really rather not think about.Unluckily for him, he's apparently not too busy for impromptu visits from one of the most wanted men in the system.

a lesson in cartography by novembersmith | Uprooted | Agnieska/Sarkan | 7k | “I will never cease to be amazed at your unequaled talent for creating chaos out of the simplest components. You were meant to be scrying and map-making. What were you doing?”

heart on a string by jilliancares | She-Ra | Adora/Catra | A good Force Captain would do a lot of things that Catra wouldn’t, like not pulling their punches when fighting Adora and not sneaking into Castle Bright Moon for anything less than evil purposes. Unfortunately, Catra wasn’t a very good Force Captain, despite striving all her life to become one.No, everything had changed when Adora wandered into the stupid Whispering Woods to find a moral compass. Little did she know she was dragging Catra’s heart on a string behind her.

December

Aia ke ola i Motunui by asteriae | Moana | Moana/Maui | 25k | The trouble with saving the world and returning home a hero with a demigod by your side, is it really scares off potential suitors.

lilies of the valley (cover me with kisses, make my garden grow) by diasterisms | Star Wars | Reylo | 8k | Every girl is entitled to the mistake. That one colossal fuck-up that permanently alters the terrain of who you are. You'll either learn from it or you won't, so might as well have the time of your life.

Astronomical Odds by xzombiexkittenx for Cinnamaldeide | Hannibal | Hannigram | 2.5k | Picked up a hitchhiker last night. He said, “Thanks! how do you know I’m not a serial killer though?” I replied, “The chances of two serial killers being in the same car are astronomical.”

meet me in the woods tonight by brawlite, ToAStranger | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 86k | There’s something in the woods of Hawkins, Indiana.

Notes of Noy, Notes of Joy by pendrecarc | Spinning Silver | Miryem/The Staryk | 5k | "I might wander ten thousand years in the goblin depths and never find a way out again...."Miryem descends into the depths with no more than a dagger in her hand, a mirror about her neck, and a song in her heart to bring her husband out again.

if you don't like the company, let's just do it you and me by hoppnhorn, thecopperkid | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 9k | “Stevie, Stevie, Stevie,” Billy tuts, and it’s nearly sickening, too fucking good, the way he looks like he can think of nothing better than digging his teeth into Steve Harrington. “Look at you. What’re we gonna do with you, huh? Tell me what you want, pretty boy.”

B-Sides by notbecauseofvictories | Devil Went Down to Georgia | The Devil/Johnny | 5k | All the tunes that didn't make the cut.

DELIGHTFUL FANVIDS

June

Steve Rogers | Elegy

Lucifer | Heaven's Door

in my veins | keith

[𝙺𝙻𝙰𝙽𝙲𝙴] WAVES

Voltron | Rise

VOLTRON || H O M E || Season 6

Eleven || I'm this way because of you

July

Tenth Doctor | Reminiscence

Lucifer | Heaven's Door

Marvel || Where are you now? (Faded)

Stranger Things | Heroes

What if THOR RAGNAROK had an anime opening?

August

the maze [multifandom]

Gilbert Blythe || The last, the only

K E I T H // "I won't quit" (6x07)

(Marvel) Avengers | Sacrifice

sᴜʀᴠɪᴠᴏʀ (ᴇᴘɪᴄ) // {Voltron AMV} ᴍᴀᴊᴏʀ sᴇᴀsᴏɴ �� sᴘᴏɪʟᴇʀs

Voltron | Rise (Season 6)

sᴏʟᴅɪᴇʀ // {Voltron AMV} ᴍᴀᴊᴏʀ sᴇᴀsᴏɴ 𝟼 sᴘᴏɪʟᴇʀs

Marvel | We Will Rock You

infinity war || bleeding heart

How Far We've Come - Voltron AMV (s1-s6)

Kylo Ren | Look What You Made Me Do

Way Down We Go｜Detroit: Become Human

Loki // Hustler

Born ready [VOLTRON]

You could be h̶a̶p̶p̶y̶ and I won't know

ʜᴏᴡ ғᴀʀ ᴡᴇ'ᴠᴇ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ

voltron s7 | home

VOLTRON || FIX YOU || Season 7

almost everything;

Infinity War || Flesh and Bone

Broken People || Avengers Infinity War

September

Marvel || Death is not the End

Blood//Water || Voltron Legendary Defender

The Wolf|Voltron| AMV

Harry Potter || Across this New Divide

► I Like Me Better

Game of Thrones | Flesh and Bone [6K]

October

The Byers || We can fix it, together

Legion || The World Killer

Infinity War || Violet Hill

Mike & Eleven || Out of the darkness

My Hero Academia「AMV」|| You Can Become A Hero

MARVEL || Stronger [The Score]

Peter + Roman | he hurt you

peter & roman | animals

November

N/A

December

Excelsior, Stan Lee

[Catradora] ＴｈｅＥｎｅｍｙ

Avengers: Endgame - (Logan Style)

2018 --Trailers Mashup

X Ambassadors - UNSTEADY | Official Dance Video #LoveisLove

2018 Movie Trailer Mashup

just a machine? [Detroit: Become Human] *HBD Pteryx*

who are you? | Connor | Detroit: Become Human

Detroit: Become Human || Paralyzed

DELIGHTFUL MUSIC

June

Emeli Sande - Daddy

EMPIRES Hello Lover

Stupid | Brendan Maclean

Chaos Chaos - Do You Feel It?

GHITA - Mindfvck

Olivia O'Brien - Fuck Feelings

gnash - i hate u, i love u ft. olivia o'brien

Paradise Valley | Honey and the Sting

Hidden Citizens - Hazy Shade of Winter

Attila the King | Nick Glennie-Smith

Lawless - Crossing Over (feat. IO Echo)

Is This the End | Joseph William Morgan

Man or a Monster | Sam Tinnesz(feat. Zayde Wølf)

EXPERIENCE - LUDOVICO EINAUDI

Nothing Matters When We’re Dancing, Sense8 Remix ft Zoe Wise

Moonlight End Credits | Nicholas Britell

July

Ori and the Blind Forest Soundtrack

Little Sadie - Crooked Still

That Feeling When - Dagny

Asylums for the Feeling - Silent Poets

Starboy - The Weeknd

Lash Out - Alice Merton

Liztomania - Phoenix

Alice - Fields and Planes

Little Black Submarines - The Black Keys

Ahead By a Century - The Tragically Hip

Can I Sit Next To You - Spoon

Fantasy Reading Soundtrack

Watercast Soundtrack

HAEVN - The Sea

August

Achilles Come Down - Gang of Youths

Ocean Size - Jane’s Addiction

174 Hours - Jeff Russo

you should see me in a crown - billie eilish

the trapper and the furrier - regina spektor

the war - syml

lion - saint mesa

island - svrcina

who are you - svrcina

lovely - billie eilish

hold me - the sweeplings

natural - imagine dragons

mermaid - skott

sky full of song - florence + the machine

music to watch boys to - lana del rey

road river and rail - cocteau twins

hypnos - daemonia nymphe

in a landscape - john cage

mmm mmm mmm mmm - crash test dummies

queendom - aurora

ordinary world - duran duran

September

silent lucidity - queensryche

friends - marshmello

popular - nada surf

song of the sea lullaby - nolwenn leroy

flesh and bone - black math

the wolf - siames

broken people- rag n bone man & logic

nina cried power ep - hozier

kol nidrey - the yuval ron ensemble

amen - for king & country

stronger - the score

rise like a phoenix - conchita wurst

heroes - mans zelmerlow

cut to the feeling - carly rae jepsen

electrified - just loud

all my friends - the revivalists

the way you used to do - queens of the stone age

the morning after - maureen mcgovern

killer shangri-lah - psychotic beats

work it out - effee

sous les aquarelles - ingrid st-pierre

the other side - greatest showman ensemble

the greatest show - greatest showman ensemble

never enough - loren allred

this is me - greatest showman ensemble

October

SOS - Cher

Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! - Cher

Dancing Queen - Cher

Perfect Opening Line - The Frames

Twin Fawn - Chelsea Wolfe

The Plains/Bitter Dancer - Fleet Foxes

Don’t Fall In Love - Still Corners

Acid Rain - Lorn

One Night Only - The Struts

Goodbye My Lover - James Blunt

Always Starting Over - Idina Menzel

Ghost of John - Kristin Lawrence

Fernando - Cher

The Ancestors - Dario Marianelli

November

Turn Back Time - Cher

It’s Quiet Uptown - Kelly Clarkson

Stranger Things - Facing West

Saturn - Sleeping At Last

The Origin of Love - Hedwig

December

DJ Earworm Mashup - United State of Pop 2018 (Turnin' It Up)

DECADE OF POP | The Megamix (2008-2018) // by Adamusic

MASHUP 2018 "THE GREATEST HOPE" - 2018 Year End Mashup

DANCE TO 2018 | YEAR END MEGAMIX (MASHUP) // by Adamusic

Vivaldi Recomposed by Max Richter

WRITTEN FIC

June

and i'm always tired, but never of you | The Bright Sessions | Sam/Damien/Mark | 10,405 words | Sam runs into Damien at the grocery store two years later. It changes everything.

July

N/A

August

tides will bring me back to you | Kingdom Hearts | Axel/Roxas | 7,383 words | When Axel was sixteen, he did something stupid. He and a couple of his friends took his mom’s car up to the mountains, where they’d spent the better part of the day drinking bottles of stolen liquor and staggering along a heavily forested trail, laughing and bumping into trees as they went. As it was getting dark, they’d ended up near the end of it, where the heavy brush of the trees gave way to open sky and sea, a quiet little cove in the middle of nowhere.Then, one of his friends said, “I dare you to go in the water.”

September

Smallest Light | Stranger Things | Gen, El & Will | 5,165 words | In the summer of 1986, Will’s mom marries Jim Hopper. OR, Will and El learn how to be real people again together.

October

N/A

November

i don't want to rest in peace, we can haunt each other's dreams | EOS 10 | Ryan/Akmazian | 1,520 words | In the dream, Ryan wakes up and Akmazian is there.

December

Looking For Atlantis | SGA | Mcshep | 4,632 words | Hey Rodney, the postcard reads. Go see a movie.

keep your heart open (i'll keep mine open too) | Stranger Things | Harringrove | 7,915 words | “Did you even like me before you found out I was your soulmate?” Billy murmurs as he kisses a line down Steve’s throat.

FANMIXES/GRAPHICS

December

2018 Playlist

#heather says what #scrapbook #2018

2 notes · View notes

fearofyoongi-blog · 7 years ago

Text

Oblivious To My Dream

[ The Wild Someone pt. 1 ]

tags: college au, youtuber taehyung, dancer jimin, dancer jungkook, new york city, yoonmin, eventual taekook

main character: kim taehyung

word count: 4641

read the prologue HERE

“Hey— Oh, sorry. Were you recording?” Jimin asked with a wincing expression. Taehyung felt very familiar with that look though. There was one person who had no shame in interrupting his livestreams or recordings. Park Jimin. Not that Tae ever minded. Sometimes he felt insecure in himself, especially around Jimin’s energetic behaviors. He could let the other go on and on, without any regards.

The video he finished posting was a prime example of that. Taehyung spent the better half of three hours editing the video that meant to be a book haul. Instead, Jimin encouraged him to spend more money on other things. American skin products. American clothes. American movies. Additionally, instead of making the video alone, Jimin sat by him. Making more commentary than needed through the entire recording. So Taehyung busied himself this afternoon and made sure to do the video he wanted.

Taehyung shook his head at Jimin, pushing out his lower lip. “Nope,” He responded with the pop of his lip. “Checking emails,” He lied before clasping his hands together. “Did you just get home from yesterday?”

The clothes gave his roommate away without a doubt. Taehyung recalled Jimin in the same yellow pullover yesterday. Except with different colored jeans. Something he could assume was an accident, since these new jeans fit the other well. Tilting his head, he glared at Jimin and waited for an answer.

Yet the other guy nodded with enthusiasm at the question. Taehyung was well aware of Jimin’s new relationship. His roommate had been seeing this guy, Min Yoongi, for a few weeks now. The couple spent almost every evening together. Taehyung didn’t mind having the apartment to himself these days. He found it romantic that the couple wanted to spend that much time together.

“We’re going out again tonight too,” Jimin finally added after realizing Taehyung was quiet. “You, me and Yoongi. It’s time you met him.” A soft groan escaped Tae before his roommate continued with urgency. “It’s to celebrate! To celebrate us, Tae! Three years in the city. We’re almost done with school, we’ve been roommates for this long. We have to celebrate before finals consumes our lives.”

Taehyung was not tough to persuade when it came to invites and social gatherings. He enjoyed the nightlife and enjoyed going out with his best friend. On the other hand, he had an odd feeling brewing in his stomach. What if he didn’t like Yoongi? What if he ended up being the third wheel? What if he was jealous? Taehyung rubbed his lips together as Jimin gave him a deep pout. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“You look like you’re about to turn me down.” He snorted at that. “Tae…” Jimin sighed before moving further into the room. “Let’s go out. I want you to meet him. He’s a good guy.”

“I’m not even saying anything, and you’re begging me,” Taehyung commented. Tilting his chin up at Jimin as he adjusted his glasses, he continued. “You’re not going to let me say no, so… might as well give me the details.”

Jimin shouted for glee, moving closer to hug Taehyung as if he had coaxed him into the plan. “In an hour! I already scheduled an Uber so get up!—”

“Wha--”

Jimin clapped, which echoed the room, to interrupt Tae. He began moving out of the room and stripping his clothes to prepare for the evening. “Yes! Come on. Put something else on and meet me in the lobby! Happy hour starts at 5pm and I don’t want to miss it— again." He glared back into Tae’s room, knowing the other hadn’t even stood up from his desk yet.

“Alright… Alright… I’m going…” Tae huffed in defeat, walking over to his closet. They weren't many outfits in his closet. Not for this occasion. After a pensive search, he decided on a pair of black leggings and an oversized burgundy blouse. The leggings were tight, and the shirt was too big for his frame. Tae then added his favorite black loafers and his eyes settled on a black beret as well, to which made him smile.

Sighing, he tossed the beret on his head and pushed it backwards. Tae seemed to have enough time to look at himself in the mirror. Smoothing over the light wrinkles in the front of his shirt whilst chewing on his lip. He swallowed thick, wondering if this was decent last minute outfit. It did seem like a typical, casual outfit for the guy. It was very conservative, some would call it old fashioned, but it fit his frame well and didn’t make him feel so small.

Standing next to Jimin felt like that sometimes. Jimin was a dancer, slender in his waist but thick in his thighs. More often than not Taehyung would catch himself comparing their physiques. Tae was not as active as his roommate, so he never took any of the internal criticism to heart. Still he would feel nervous. Jimin’s personality, plus his style, on top of his body type, he was an eye catcher. Something Taehyung never felt like, being a farmer’s son and all.

He waited another few minutes for his friend. Despite his words, Jimin never failed to be the last ready to leave. His roommate's outfit wasn't much different from his own. Jimin paired his black skinny jeans with black boots. The turtleneck framed his jaw, while the yellow moon on his sweater matched his golden hair well.

Credit goes to searching for the perfect evening outfit. It seemed as though their Uber driver waited an extra four minutes for them because of it. The man had no issue complaining about it. Jimin apologized with a pout and offered his boyish charms. Not long after the scolding did their driver start to take them to their destination.

“You didn’t finish giving me the details,” Taehyung spoke up after a few minutes. “Where are we going?”

“You look fine, if that’s what you’re asking,” Jimin retorted with nonchalance in his tone. His eyes trained on the open Uber app. He watched the destination on the screen with a pensive expression.

“That’s not what I’m asking--” Taehyung rolled his eyes before glancing out the window. The car took an unexpected drive over a bridge, so he knew for sure they were meeting Yoongi somewhere out of the way. The guy cursed under his breath at his friend. It never failed that he would be drug off to places courtesy of Jimin.

It seemed like Jimin could read his mind though, because without missing a beat, he huffed and spoke again. “There’s a new bar not far from here,” He explained as if it were an inconvenience. “Yoongi had some business in Lower Manhattan. So we’re just meeting him halfway.” Licking over his lips, he tilted his head at his friend and smiled. “You’re gonna like him, just watch.”

Taehyung wasn’t as sure as Jimin about this. He was a kind person, sure, and he knew how to turn on his charm whenever necessary. That didn’t always mean he liked every person he came across. Even so, he knew better than to argue with Jimin. Least of all in front of a total stranger. Taehyung nodded in response, and pursed his lips. “What does he do? Yoongi? Some business in Lower Manhattan sounds suspicious.” He teased, revealing a toothy grin to the other to show his jest.

After elbowing him, Jimin scratched his neck. “He’s a music producer.”

Taehyung raised a brow. “And how did you meet him again?”

“Just coincidence,” Jimin smiled to himself before shrugging and glancing to Taehyung. “I went out with some friends, he was at the bar... I said hi. We hit it off.”

He could sense that his friend was smitten, but he didn’t know how bad it was until now. Making a sour face, he giggled and released a groan. “You’re taking six classes this semester. It’s your last year of college, you have an internship coming up, and you work full-time. I’m curious how you make time for Yoongi.” It was an odd, condescending question, Tae didn’t mean any offense. He couldn’t resist his curiosity. His own schedule, which was less stressful than his Jimin's, conflicted. He couldn’t imagine adding a romantic aspect to it. Not right now.

Yet the question only made Jimin smile wider. He was blushing bright red and he shrugged again. “We make it work. I don’t know how. We just do.” Meeting his friend’s eyes again, Jimin rested his palm under Tae’s chin. “When you know it’ll be worth it, making time just comes naturally.”

As he was about to speak- hoping to ask another question- the car pulled into a parallel space and stopped. The driver put his vehicle in park and caught a glimpse of them through the darkness. “My wife and I met by chance in 2004,” The man started with a frail smile. “I worked for a taxi company and she was running late to a meeting she considered the most important of her life.” His smile seemed to grow, the more he talked about the encounter. “It was a thirty minute ride to her destination and we never stopped talking. Instead of getting out of the car, she stayed. I didn’t charge her. We talked and drove for two hours. We married three weeks later,” His eyes checked on both Jimin and Taehyung before snorting. “Don’t let love slip by. Never.” Then he turned back in his seat and huffed, adjusting his Uber app. “Be safe tonight, kids.”

Jimin and Taehyung looked at each other before exiting the car. Neither had anything else to say in that moment. Tae seemed locked in his own thoughts. It seemed pure, the little detail that man shared. Taehyung would cherish it forever. When he thought about love, he reflected on his favorite books. The cliche romance novels with a man catching a woman. Those were his favorite to swoon over, to recite, to remember. As he considered those novels, he looked at Jimin.

The other was talking to a hostess, checking to see if Min Yoongi was on the list. Taehyung bit down on his lip as he thought of an apology. I should give Yoongi a chance. I’m being too harsh and I haven’t met him, the guy said to himself. Fingers clasped together as he looked into the unknown bar. Tae gulped as he imagined what Yoongi would look like. What was Jimin’s type anyway?

For someone so outgoing and free, Jimin kept this relationship private. Jimin never posted anything about Yoongi. Not a photo, a quote, nothing. Jimin never went into detail about the relationship. Least of all what Yoongi looked like. It was in his thoughts that he realized he was being watched. His eyes panned over the bar from the window, but he could feel foreign eyes on him from inside.

The bar was beautiful from the outside looking in though. Red and black themes furnished the brick building. The booths were dark and leather while the hardwood floors seemed almost red. A bar lined the left half of the area. Next to that were stairs, where Taehyung could only assume were for VIP rooftop service. That was typical for a bar. If he were being honest, Tae examined the bar's aesthetic as a means to avoid the stark stare he pulled from inside.

Taehyung found the eyes at the corner of the room. The other man was standing with his hands in his pockets. His eyes were dark and heavy. Tae wanted to assume the inside of the bar's windows had a tint to them. So no one on the inside could see out. That their eyes didn’t meet. Yet when the stranger noticed that Taehyung noticed him, he smirked. Nothing wide and toothy, or shy. No, this guy was making eye contact without apology. Taehyung gulped and moved his eyes, focusing on Jimin again. In a moment's notice, the hostess escorted them inside after figuring out where Yoongi was on the list.

Jimin rested his hand on the small of Taehyung’s back. Thankful for the touch, as it pulled Tae out of his thoughts. “Come on, he’s inside already,” He addressed his friend with a sense of excitement in his tone. It was quite cute, considering Jimin had only recently left Yoongi’s home. How long have they gone without seeing each other? Taehyung didn’t hinder Jimin any longer though, following his lead into the bar. It was hard not to notice the eyes still on him. Feeling watched was something that never escaped him.

It made his skin hot. If it weren’t for his golden skin tone, Taehyung was sure the stranger would catch him blushing. His ears even felt warm. The walk through the bar was long and winding. Taehyung ended up settling behind Jimin. Praying to no longer be in direct view of unnecessary eyes. He swallowed thick as he noticed they were getting closer to the man staring at him. Worrying seemed to be a lost cause because the stranger’s party started to filter out. Taehyung peeked from over Jimin's shoulder while watching the stranger. The other trailed behind a few other men. To Tae, they all looked the same height. Meekly he caught a better glance, finding his eyes wider than ever as they met the stranger's.

It happened for less than a few seconds, but he seemed entranced. For those few moments, he became trapped in a bubble with this other man. He was tall, his hair dark and almost covering his eyes. Taehyung released a shaky breath and caught a glimpse of the other’s backside. Muscular, his clothes casual and loose, just like Taehyung’s. Except the stranger’s jeans were better fitted, and he wore Timberlands that only added to his height. As the other walked further away, he headed in the direction from which Taehyung arrived. Their eye contact did not falter.

It was then that he realized his heart was unsteady. Each step away from the other caused his heartbeat to race faster. Half of him unsure of the staring, the other half so sure and familiar that he didn’t want it to end. Taehyung wanted to follow behind this stranger and talk to him. Similar to what Jimin said he had done for Yoongi. It was unfortunate that he had hardly taken in his surroundings at that moment. Taehyung was so encased in the gaze that he bumped into a booth. Stumbling and falling front first into the seat. He didn’t have time to catch the stranger’s reaction. By the time he recovered, the other was out of the door and on the street.

The eye contact, broken by clumsiness.

A shaky breath escaped his lips as he found himself seated beside another stranger. This one seemed less gawky and more present in the moment. Tae’s eyes searched for Jimin with urgency, only to find him sitting opposite of this stranger. A platinum blonde, thin man wearing a long sleeve sweater and ripped skinny jeans. This had to be Min Yoongi.

Taking them in, as a couple, made Tae smile. The blonde in Yoongi’s hair matched the golden color of Jimin’s. Even the way they greeted each other was cute. A simple, bashful grin. Then Yoongi bumped Jimin's chin with his thumb, causing Jimin to wither in his seat. Taehyung was jealous of the moment. Neither bothered to address him yet. They seemed lost in their reunion which made him snort. At least it gave him enough time to peek at the entrance of the bar again. Deep in regret, he wished the stranger would return. If not for a hello, at least a goodbye.

Nothing.

In disappointment, he fiddled with the menu on the table. With no aim or thoughts, the guy flipped through the Happy Hour options and sighed. Taehyung was only met with that feeling of drabness, then the sound of Jimin calling his name.

“Hm?” He grumbled before he turned his attention back to the people beside him.

“Tae,” Jimin chuckled in a breathy expression after saying his name. “This is Yoongi, the guy I’ve been telling you so much about.” Typical him, to compliment himself. The comment made Yoongi cringe, his eyes squinting with embarrassment.

“Right, yes,” Taehyung sat up straighter and extended his hand to Yoongi. “I’m Taehyung. Jimin’s roommate. I’m sure you have heard plenty about me too, right?” He asked starkly, joking at first but deep down hoping Jimin brought him up. They were best friend’s after all.

“He might have mentioned you, one time too many,” Yoongi replied with a daring grin. The proud guy took Tae's hand and shook it. Jimin matched that with a smack on Yoongi's arm before hiding his face in his sweater.

After putting his hand down, Tae fell back into his thoughts. He wondered about the stranger and who he was. Most of all, if Yoongi knew him. He allowed the couple to fall into a conversation after giving their drink orders to a waitress. Tae would wait all night if he had to, if it meant finding out who the stranger was. For now, and the next thirty minutes, his attention focused on his phone as he checked his phone.

Lucky for him, he did not wait long. Five minutes after, the waitress returned with their drinks. Jimin started to speak again while Tae and Yoongi downed their round of drinks. “Who were those guys sitting with you before us? I meant to ask earlier. I hope we didn’t just interrupt your meeting.” Jimin said wryly, though Taehyung knew his words were only to show modesty. Again, Jimin was the king of interruption and great timing.

This conversation caught Tae's attention, and he turned to them again. He settled his phone in his pocket and listened.

“That was Jin and... some dance group. He wants to hire them for his new artist’s music video,” Yoongi started, both him and Tae watched as Jimin nodded along. “You haven’t met Jin, he’s been out of town for awhile.” Then he turned to Tae. “Jin’s my roommate. He owns a part of his dad’s record label, so he’s got creative rights of almost everything in his side.” Tae’s eyes followed as Yoongi began to rub his hands along his pants. Was he nervous about something?

“Jin just got back into the city so I had him meet up with me here for drinks. While I waited for you. I didn’t know he was bringing them,” Yoongi further explained to Jimin without missing a beat. Even emphasizing the word them as a means to defend himself.

Taehyung finally spoke up. “Who are they?”

Surprised by the interest, Yoongi and Jimin looked at Tae. Jimin grinned coyly while Yoongi answered his question. “--Don’t know. Never met them before now. I know they’re a dance crew that’s from South Korea. They travel a lot and are pretty well known.”

“He meant their names,” Jimin added hoarsely, glaring at Taehyung. There was a pause from Yoongi. Tae and Jimin were doing a weird gaze that seemed unreadable to the naked eye. Something Yoongi wouldn’t be able to translate, even if he wanted to. “Oh, don’t give me that." Jimin scoffed at Tae. "I saw you staring at them. Which one caught your eye, hm?.” He taunted Tae, who bashfully scratched his neck.

Nice as he was, Yoongi shrugged. “Honestly, I didn’t ask. I didn’t know he was bringing them so I didn’t bother to learn about them any better.” Yoongi said, in hopes of getting the spotlight off of Taehyung. They all sipped their drinks for a second before he continued. “They did follow me on Instagram, from their account. They’re gonna be in town for another week or so. I can link you up, if you want.”

That right there was enough of a let down for Taehyung. To hear the stranger he met eyes with will only be in town temporarily. It seemed that all hope to know him better washed away. Knowing who he was would be pointless. "Not necessary, I was only curious," Tae sat back against the booth and finished his drink. Maybe that’s why he didn’t say anything, He told himself. He knew it would be pointless, too. Pressing his lips into a thin line, he waved a waitress down and asked for shots and another drink.

Jimin felt caught off guard, but more than accepting of a shot. Yoongi didn’t decline either, despite being here the longest, and offered to put the order on his tab. When the drinks arrived, Taehyung downed one and only asked for more. If he was going to mope, he would rather do it drunkenly. Tae continued to sit in silence. Yoongi and Jimin became involved in yet another conversation. They seemed good at that. Good for them.

His gaze went back to the entrance of the bar. Dazed and confused about the guy he let walk away. If it was pointless to dwell, then why was he dwelling? Taehyung had never felt this out of place before. Whenever he went to a bar with Jimin, his friend seemed to be the center of attention. Guys, girls, it didn't matter. Tae was much more reserved. Yes, easy to speak to, yet difficult to capture his attention. Regardless, even without a word, he captured this stranger's stare. Of course he wanted to know why that was. Even if he were to find out it was for his best friend, like every other time before.

“So what do you do?” Yoongi asked, a few minutes later. Managing to pull Taehyung out of his sullen thoughts for a conversation. “I mean, I know you’re in college like Jimin but… What do you?”

“Literature,” Taehyung said shortly before returning to his drink.

“He loves books and novels and films.” Jimin stated in addition to his roommate's brief explanation. “He has a YouTube channel too. He talks about all kinds of literature on there. It’s fascinating.” Tae snorted at Jimin’s compliment though. Knowing well that the other didn’t watch any of his content. Only if he was in the video as well. Even so, Jimin would sit there and talk about himself throughout the entire video. Nothing more.

“I enjoy scripts and broadway too,” Tae said after an extra minute of his silence. Jimin had gone on about something else, but Taehyung didn’t hesitate to cut his friend off. As a means to answer Yoongi. “I like musicals. I try to go to plays in the city. They’re expensive, so I only go once a year. Haven’t missed one yet.”

Yoongi was quiet, nodding along to everything Tae revealed. “Wow, you’re really into the arts, huh?” Taehyung nodded. “Do you do anything yourself? Like, writing, acting even? Painting? Or are you only a fan?”

“He sings,” Jimin, once again, chiming in. “Boy, if you like my voice, you should hear his.”

Taehyung dismissed his friend nonchalantly. “I don’t sing. I mean, I do, but I’m not trained. Not like Jimin.”

He could sense Yoongi feeling overwhelmed by this tennis game of conversation. The guy’s head was bouncing between the two of them as they carried themselves through. A smile lifted his features before he laughed. “You should let me hear you someday. Did Jimin tell you I’m a music producer? I’m always looking for people to work with.”

Jimin shifted in his seat and cleared his throat.

Taehyung didn't noticed. Instead he agreed and shook his head all the same. “Singing isn’t my thing though. I do it in passing but-- it’s not my thing.”

“Then what’s your thing?”

Taehyung didn’t know who the question came from, but he didn’t answer either way. He swallowed thick before taking down the rest of his drink. If they had asked, he would admit that he didn’t understand the question. For as long as he could remember, his thing was literature. He dreamed of other ambitions. Being an actor, being on broadway and singing, but those weren’t serious careers. Not for him.

Not for the farmer’s son from South Korea.

His parents allowed him to move to South Korea for the sake of bettering his education. If they ever learned about this need of his, this insatiable need to be front and center? He didn't know how they would react. He didn't know if he wanted to know either. So he suppressed these ambitions. Rather than pursuing them, he stood behind his desires. Tae vowed to channel his interest elsewhere.

At some point he felt himself check out completely. The third or fourth round of drinks had met the roommates with glee. Taehyung drank and drank until he was a giggling, bubbly mess. He remembered dancing around a little bit, outside of the bar. Jimin and him locked arms and shouted to the city until they became hoarse. They friends were lucky enough that Yoongi had a car, so they could catch a ride from him.

From there, it all seemed like a blur. Taehyung hopped into the backseat of the car and laid on it. Jimin rested in front, entwining his fingers with Yoongi's free hand. Both were singing with the radio. Whatever was playing, even if Tae's English wasn’t perfect, he caught every melody. From the backseat, he opened up his phone and jumped on Instagram. He can’t remember why or when he pressed the ‘Start Live Video’ button, but he did it. In a matter of seconds, his followers joined the video chat. They all seemed to enjoy and listen to Taehyung’s rendition of the song played.

Even Jimin and Yoongi were quiet and attentive. They made eye contact and nodded at each other. Jimin basked in the glow of being right about Taehyung. The guy could sing, even if he wasn’t trained like him. If Taehyung were listening close enough, he would hear Yoongi mentioning a track he had in mind. While listening to Tae sing, he imagined the song and melody, how it was perfect for him. If he were paying attention, he could hear Yoongi begging Jimin not to feel upset about this.

Yet Taehyung seemed lost in his own world. Singing to the song with confidence even he couldn’t recognize. As the third song came to an end, he looked at his feed and grinned wide at the followers watching. Insisting, with a finger to his lips, that they could keep this secret between them. Before he knew it, Tae exited the app and laid hard against the seat. The familiar bridge, from earlier, came into view from the window. He knew he was going to be home soon. Try as he might, he couldn’t stay awake for the rest of the trip.

Instead his eyes fluttered shut as visions of the stranger from the bar came to view. Tae dreamed of singing to the boy. Singing until he agreed to stay with him. Don’t let love slip by, he hummed to the man in his dream. Never. Fingers caressing the skin he wished to know. If only it were real. If only.

#please do not repost or reblog. likes are okay!#chapter series: oblivious to my dreams #bts fanfic #taehyung fanfic #taekook fanfic

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hawkeyedflame · 7 years ago

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Hey, I'm not sure if I'm doing the right thing by asking this in question but would you say it's possible to have executive dysfunction while still being able to perform well in school? I don't have trouble with assignments but I've been wanting to read a book that sits in a cupboard 5 centimeters from me ever since October and haven't been able to force myself to open it. Could this be explained by EFD or should I look into something else? Or maybe I'm just lazy lol idk

It is absolutely possible. I excelled in high school while also committing myself to cross country and indoor/outdoor track sixs days a week for five years. I graduated with 15 varsity letters, over thirty medals at district and state meets, a 4.0 GPA, special or high honors every semester, 97th+ percentile on my SATs, 4s and 5s on all six AP exams, early acceptance to University with a merit scholarship, etc etc. I could go on but you get the point: you can have executive dysfunction and be successful in school.

[This got really long so I’m putting a readmore]

You might be wondering how I managed all those achievements if I have this disorder that I say I have. That’s normal. Most people hear “ADHD” and think “hyperactive child who can’t focus in school.” While that’s sometimes true, it’s far from an all-inclusive representation. The answer to my previous academic success, I’ve realized, is that I relied very heavily on externally-imposed structureLet me walk you through one of my days in high school, and you’ll see just how much of my routine was being enforced externally.

My alarm went off every day at 6:20am, and my dad made sure I was out of bed by 6:30 before he went to work. He usually made steel cut oats and left some for me. My mom always made sure there was enough food in the house so I could make my own lunch. I let the chickens out before leaving for school.I went to school for six hours of short (50 mins) classes of 18-25 students, where my teachers knew me (and my parents) and where phones and laptops were strictly forbidden. Notes were taken on paper only and homework assignments were due the next class, and everything was graded. Agendas were given out at the beginning of each year and we were expected to use them every day. Parents would be notified if behavioral or performance issues arose.After school I went to cross country or track practice where the captains led us through warm ups and then the coach told us what sort of training we were doing that day. They often timed us and recorded our progress over the season/years.After practice I went home, where my mom was starting dinner, and I did my homework that I had to do if I didn’t want to get a 0 and have a parent-teacher conference. I ate dinner, did the dishes because that was my chore, put the chickens away, worked on more homework, and then by 9:30pm my mom would be berating me to go to bed. I didn’t have a smartphone or a computer so it wasn’t possible for me to lay in bed staring at a screen all night. On weekends I cleaned the bathrooms and vacuumed the house because that was my job. Somewhere in there I also cleaned the chicken coop and attended to their food and water.Rinse and repeat.

If you look at that routine, you’ll see only two tasks that I truly did on my own: making my lunch and putting the chickens in/out. I didn’t want to go hungry at school, so I made myself food. And I frequently forgot to let the chickens out (and put them back in, but fortunately we had a solid run that kept predators out). Everything else that appears to be self-discipline was actually motivated by desire to avoid external punishment. And that punishment was very real to me because it was always immediate and harsh.Late for school? Detention. Phone in class? Confiscated, sometimes detention. Didn’t take notes/do the homework? 0s in class, parents notified, not allowed to participate in sports, absolutely grounded. Skipping practice? Not allowed to participate in meets, possibly kicked off the team, definitely in trouble with Mom and Dad. Don’t do chores? Time to get yelled at. Don’t take care of the chickens? They might die and then I’d be in huge trouble. Stay up too late? Yelled at.Everything I did was motivated not by desire to serve my own future, but desire to avoid immediate negative consequence. And I didn’t have hobbies for myself. I liked reading but I didn’t have much time for it. I didn’t play video games, surf social media, watch TV, go to the movies, or do anything purely for enjoyment’s sake.

When I went to college, all of that structure disappeared. I didn’t do a sport because I couldn’t compete at a Division I school (partially due to joint pain). My classes were large, long, and spaced out throughout the day, with weird breaks between them. Most professors didn’t care if we had phones or laptops, and often we actually needed them for class. Homeworks were due online, sometimes two weeks from when they were assigned. Grades were posted online. No warning for poor performance, no teacher giving me a talking to, no parent-teacher conference. Nobody told me when to do homework. Nobody told me when to eat (or to go grocery shopping). Nobody made sure I went to bed or got up in the morning. Nobody kept me from playing video games or scrolling social media all day.Nothing except my own desire to succeed held me accountable for managing my time and working hard in class, and like I said, I didn’t have that desire. People with ADHD don’t have that. Motivation and self-discipline stem primarily from aversion to negative long-term consequences, even more so than from desire to obtain positive outcomes. This is because negative emotion is felt more strongly and for a longer duration than positive emotion. It keeps neurotypical people on track. But people with ADHD lack the ability to “see” the long term consequences of not doing what we need to do, when it needs to be done. That’s why we are chronic procrastinators. We favor instant gratification over delayed gratification because we fail to integrate awareness of far-off consequences into our daily actions. In other words, people with ADHD struggle to orient their behavior towards their goals because it is difficult for our brains to recognize things in the future as real.

And so, because of all that stuff under the surface, I floundered and flailed. I didn’t know how to hold myself responsible and I didn’t know how to ask for help. And I was depressed. I was so depressed. And anxious. And losing weight because I wasn’t remembering to eat. And that made my body weak, it made my hands shake and it made my brain dull and foggy. I was being treated for depression and anxiety because nobody saw the other half of my history. The part where I crumbled the moment I had to hold myself up. It was missed entirely until I stumbled across information about rejection sensitive dysphoria, which is only experienced by people with ADHD, and I realized that rejection by my parents was what drove that fear of consequence that had been motivating me all my life. When I started looking at my history through the lens of inattentive ADHD, the picture became clear. It wasn’t laziness or depression that was stopping me, it was executive dysfunction.

So my point in all this is YES, it is 100% possible and is actually quite common for people with executive dysfunction to excel in structured academic environments. It’s especially normal for people whose ADHD is dominated by inattentive symptoms over hyperactive ones. One of the major reasons why many young women are not diagnosed until their late teens/early 20s is because they’re more often inattentive, not hyperactive, and so their executive dysfunction doesn’t become apparent until they enter an environment, such as university or a job, where they are expected to hold themselves entirely accountable for their own positive outcomes.

As for you personally, I can’t diagnose you. I can say that what you described is possibly a symptom of executive dysfunction, but I don’t know enough about you or your behavioral history to say whether or not you should consider seeking a professional opinion. If you are experiencing deficiencies in your self-discipline/motivation/memory/attention that are disrupting your quality of life, and if you can identify those as patterns throughout your life history, then you may have reason to see a psychologist. If your symptoms are confined to inconsequential/nonessential things like reading a book you’ve been wanting to read, I wouldn’t worry about it too much as I’m fairly certain that’s a normal experience for most neurotypical people.

Anyways thanks for coming to my TED talk, sorry for taking fifty million years to get to the point.

#adhd #anonymous #sorry that i can't be concise at all ever

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scpie · 4 years ago

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3 Ways to Curb Chaos and Pull Off Last-Minute Virtual Events

August 3, 2020 6 min read

Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

The past few months of life during the coronavirus pandemic have been a whirlwind of last-minute activity and decisions. Countless employees were suddenly thrust into remote work, changing their calendars on a dime, and many companies had to move in-person gatherings and conferences to virtual meetings.

For instance, the United Nations — known for its formal meetings and conferences — began teleconferencing with mixed results, according to Devex reporting from late April 2020. Not accustomed to working virtually, U.N. employees had to pivot to recover after initial hiccups with online meetings.

A June 2020 Harvard Business Review piece outlines a similar situation for Adobe. The brand had to cancel its annual Nevada convention abruptly in light of the pandemic. Rather than lose the chance to bring everyone together in one physical location, though, Adobe moved its conference online — and more than quintupled the guest list.

Related: 10 Tips on Getting the Most Out of Business Meetings

Making online miracles out of potential mayhem

Your company might not be as well-known as the U.N. or Adobe, but you’ve likely experienced the need for unplanned, urgent virtual meetings to deal with time-sensitive information during COVID-19. That won’t stop anytime soon.

You’ll continue to be bombarded by all kinds of unexpected information. Budgets will be lost and, in some cases, found. Markets will shift. The government could release regulations affecting your operations. These shifting sands mean you can expect to arrange and execute plenty of last-minute meetings. That can be a tall order, but it’s not too tall if you’re prepared.

Salesforce, as an example, had to switch its March 2020 World Tour Sydney event from an in-person gathering to an online experience with two weeks’ notice. Their leaders stepped up to the challenge and moved everything to a livestream format. The result? The company surpassed the expectations with a record 80,000 participants.

Handling last-minute meetings with confidence

To be sure, Salesforce’s event planning was mostly done. The company could leverage talk tracks, sessions and content, making the move to a virtual stage slightly less arduous. Organizers didn’t need to start from scratch — they just needed to reframe a live experience to fit a digital format.

You might not be as lucky or well-equipped with resources the next time you face an urgent situation that requires immediate communication and collaboration through virtual channels. And that’s OK. You can still successfully host meetings and events online by practicing the three techniques below.

1. Map out a fluff-free agenda and guidelines.

You just realized you need to set up an online gathering. Don’t panic. Instead, channel your nervous energy into creating and disseminating an airtight agenda. Having a set schedule ensures all topics remain relevant to attendees. Plus, you can distribute the agenda ahead of time to encourage ordinarily quiet people to participate more fully by giving them time to think.

While working on the agenda, consider the overall length of your meeting to ensure it doesn’t spin out of control or devolve into endless segments. Thirty minutes is a good baseline. Remember: virtual-meet fatigue is real — real enough to warrant coverage by the BBC. Keep sessions tight, allowing only priority items to make the final cut. It’s easier to schedule a follow-up meeting than force people to stare at their screens for hours.

As a final note, craft meeting guidelines surrounding expected protocol, such as when participants should unmute themselves or whether everyone is required to appear on video. Mention whether you’re archiving and recording the communication to share with anyone who is unable to attend. If you’re worried about this, you can hire a digital producer to facilitate the production aspects and leave you to focus on the content.

Related: 3 Things That Will Boost Your Team’s Communication

2. Divvy up assignments and take a practice run.

Have you ever sat in a meeting without clear leadership or purpose? It’s frustrating and often disastrous. Even if you’re pressed for time, determine who needs to be present and who needs to speak. Figure out who will handle the technical aspects and who will be front and center. Even if you’re planning a seemingly straightforward meeting, outline everyone’s role to prevent missing anything important.

After fleshing out an event management document that includes specific assignments, share it. The more prepared everyone is, the better the event will flow. Oh, and make sure to practice everything from screen-sharing to using touchscreen interactive software. Videos don’t always look flawless when played over teleconferencing platforms. Slide decks can freeze and screens can become pixelated. Technology is designed to make your meetings productive and compelling, but it’s always prudent to give everything a trial run before going live.

3. Answer questions candidly and with empathy.

If you’ve asked attendees for questions in advance, distribute them to every presenter to make Q&A sessions efficient. If you haven’t requested audience questions, try to anticipate the questions participants might ask. Once you have a good idea of what people might want to know, you can consider your responses and write down bullet points. When you’re leading the meeting, answer into the camera with conviction and honesty.

When Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg faced 25,000 unhappy workers via a video call in June 2020, he could have prepared and delivered a clear answer in response to concerns about the controversy swirling around the president’s “shoot and loot” posts. He didn’t, according to Vox’s coverage. Instead, he talked about trust with employees, using language that made him seem less like their boss and more like an equally concerned colleague. His words weren’t eloquent, but they spoke volumes because they were authentic. Even though your job is to plan for your last-minute meetings, don’t plan so much that you sound robotic.

Related: Why Empathy Is Important in Leaders Right Now

It’s tough to pull together an award-winning show without much notice, but it certainly can be done. The next time you’re faced with whipping up an online meeting, take a deep breath and apply the aforementioned best practices. Over time, you’ll get a reputation for hosting every impromptu event just as well as you would have in-person.

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source http://www.scpie.org/3-ways-to-curb-chaos-and-pull-off-last-minute-virtual-events/

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allenmendezsr · 5 years ago

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zanytimetravelenthusiast-blog · 5 years ago

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musicagency-stuff-blog · 6 years ago

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How to Prevent Music Marketing Info Overload!

I intend to give you a little rule you can make use of in your music marketing that goes like this. " I will certainly spend 80% of my time creating impressive music, 15% music marketing and after that 5% understanding music marketing material." it is kind of like removing my nose to spite my face since I create a great deal of music marketing material myself, yet if you spend your whole time eating up all the info, it's extremely difficult ever before to get around to generating any type music of well worth.

And marketing crap music has a name. SPAM! You need to consider all the online training courses, overviews as well as publications like shiny items that are drawing you in all various directions as well as stick with one method till you make it a success. The truth remains that if you don't make any music of worth, you are not truly an artist. Have you ever before remained in music marketing info overload? Today I approached my computer system with exhilaration after a long weekend away with the suggestion that I would pump out some articles and also begin to service my new digital book. However, the strategy appears to have gone all rickety. I opened my Twitter customer to see that my buddy sent me a link to a great short article about exactly how to "sing like a superstar," which led to one more and then an additional. So now I recognize the theory of awesome vocal delivery however I'm no additionally on with my mission to give you men the very best music marketing details I can muster.:--LRB-. Keep in mind to self, never open Twitter in the early morning; it's a total bloody time suck!

There are a couple of points that I have discovered throughout the years (yet that I occasionally ignore) which have assisted me in being more productive in my music marketing and also in music in general. - There are only a really small number of things that need your time. These consist of making music and also advertising music, forget whatever else or do it bursts of 25 minutes every day. - Reviewing music marketing training does not count as a job; you have to set a timer and also start obtaining something also done. - Work in 50-minute bursts of the focused task with a short break in between.it will certainly help you use your body's all-natural rhythm. - Don't read your email until 4 O'clock and set a thirty minutes timer for this job. Set your band e-mail account to allow individuals to know that you are doing this to be much more efficient and also will return to them as quickly as you can. - Give yourself monthly dedications.it can be anything from composing article to calling a minimum of 5 music calls every day. What does an ineffective early morning resemble for an artist? 1. Review 20 write-ups on music marketing and music industry news. 2. Checked Twitter And Facebook for 45 mins and complied with links at random. 3. Worked on the style of the music blog on an aspect that only the perfectionists would certainly see. 4. Spent thirty minutes in the music online forums. Currently, things are that none of that stuff misbehaves and you can for believing that you had obtained your hands extremely dirty in the music organization and also made a payment. However, sadly that is not the instance because there was no emphasis and no planning. Now let's check out early morning to be happy with. 1. Spent a solid 50-minute duration working with two brand-new articles. 2. 10-minute recharge. 3. Invest another 50 minutes editing post from the previous day and also posting to the blog site. 4. 30-minute recharge. 5. 50 minutes songwriting/ tape-recording a video for YouTube to bring traffic to the blog site. 6. 10-minute recharge. 7. Added some emails to the newsletter sequence that automatically goes out to the followers. 8. Half an hour recharge. 9. Called ten place managers and reserved two jobs. 10. 10-minute recharge. 11. Spent 50 minutes answering e-mail and discovering brand-new music marketing tactics in my emphasis area. If you make a dedication like that day-to-day, you will find that your job enhances tenfold and then you can invest the rest of the day reading your email or discovering brand-new music marketing things if you like. The troubles can come when you use that very early ruptured of energy in the early morning to consume material, and afterward when you come down to do some actual work you neglect what you were doing and have no focus. It's really hard to begin generating great work half means via the day since your body has lacked perseverance and power. it's all about emphasis, and also you actually can achieve extra in 4 hrs than most people get performed in a whole day if you just shut down all that crap pulling you away from the task available. However, this article is so essential. A lot of times you may even locate that you read something that appears like it's most likely to transform your life, as well as you will tell on your own that you are making progress with your music occupation if you just master the info. Well. I will let you into a little key. You understand enough now to come to be a professional musician if you utilize what you recognize as well as make progression daily. All of us recognize what to do since it's not rocket science. So when should you feed your mind? Now if you have actually read to this factor, you might be believing that I'm recommending that you never make an effort to learn or intend which you are always blindly just mashing away at your keyboard.it could not be better from the fact because the mind is kind of like a vehicle if you are going to run miles and also miles you need the right amount of fuel at the right time. As artists as well as music marketeers we require to know what others are saying so that we can form a point of view and include new ideas to our songs as well as an advertising strategy. Below is what I would certainly suggest if you have a full-time task: Discover 4 hrs a day to work on your music marketing then think of it such as this: - Hr 1 - produce web content be it music, blogs or video clips. - Hr 2 - use auto-posting sites like Sound FM, Onlywire, Social Oomph as well as Tube Magnate to push out your material quickly. - Hr 3 - Modify your new music and post and get it ready for publishing tomorrow. - Hour 4 - Refuel, utilize this moment to inspect your email, read blog posts and also make notes. Have a rest. Another integral part of this is that you require to have time daily when you entirely switch off from whatever and also do something that does not take any mind power in all. In some cases, TV or computer game can function. You will certainly not feel guilty currently since you will certainly recognize that you have done great work that day! I kept in mind when I was making my very first album I encouraged myself that if I actually wanted to make it function I need to concentrate 22 hrs a day through of the recording and also placed whatever right into making it the most effective thing we ever before did. I would certainly spend hrs as well as hours a day just paying attention to the recordings like some sort freaky Howard Hughes guy. NOT GOOD! But what I did not realize at the time was that a break could make points function far better as well as provide you an extra point of view. While on your break you are most likely to think about an incredible new guitar hook or a lyric that is most likely to resonate deeply with your fans. If I had actually simply taken a little go back, I think I would certainly have made a lot more progress and appreciated things a whole lot much more. I now take normal breaks throughout the day as well as this maintains me focused on the task at hand and my energy degrees remain high throughout the day, which is wonderful.

The music grey zone (A massive issue!). If you take anything from this article just let it be the reality that you want to avoid spending your whole life eating up all the music marketing benefits without ever making the cake. (Wow I'm churning out the allegories today like a cow makes milk!). People assume that there is some large secret to this stuff as well as if they can discover it every little thing will certainly be OK as well as the record labels will look after them ... IT IS A MYTH! I angle' inform you the number of times I have talked with artists who groan concerning the complying with issues: - I've obtained a job, so I have no time at all to service my music career yet lots of time to play upset birds four hrs a day. - Music marketing complication if you attempt as well as do everything you will obtain nowhere, concentrate on what you understand. - I spend 3 hours a day reading every item of info and then I really feel too puzzled to do anything simply quit it, this is the bad grey area. You require to burst out of these traps now otherwise you will certainly get to completion of one more year as well as your music ambition will certainly seem even further away because you will certainly tell yourself that you are a failure. it is just one of the main factors that most individuals never make it since they never ever make a dedication to operate at it everyday doing important tasks that will have a genuine effect. Use what you learn. The primary step back for the music marketing junkie is a little of focus. If you are dealing with YouTube to bring hits to your blog site right now invest your understanding time trying to find larger and far better means to come to be the next YouTube superhero. Then when you struck the computer system next early morning use what you learn. If you follow this easy guideline, you will unexpectedly end up being far more efficient since that time you invest reviewing now has an objective. If you consume all the information like a money grubbing pig you will certainly obtain fatter and fatter as well as slower and slower until you end up being a beached whale and also will need to go for a crappy task that will certainly melt your brain. Allow me conserve your mind men. Find out once a day in a focused location and also come to be the master of it ... EASY! Last Ideas. To finish off this post I want to share my commitments for this month so you could get influenced to make a few on your own. As I said before the worst sensation on the planet is getting to the end of the year and also thinking that instead of making day-to-day progress and also accomplishing something cool you just played Call of Obligation for during and are still benefiting an employer that you would privately like to kill. - Create content that issues and also makes a difference. - Help as many individuals as feasible utilize their music talent to locate a better funner life. - Add to the Twitter and Facebook chatter as opposed to just snooping on that dude I went to senior high school with. - Blog everyday. - Post a podcast everyday. - Blog post a YouTube video everyday. - Include important comment to the music marketing neighborhood.

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