#thinking abt how my mom's probably gonna notice my poor mood at some point today and if she asks me what's wrong i just. won't know what to

[johnwicklover1999]

i am so sick of expressing my lamentations as a mixed person to my white mother! like girl no matter what you say you cannot understand, you do not understand! and yet i cannot turn to my father because he is not plagued by these things! these kinds of things, these sentiments of heritage, lineage, ancestry, culture, they are irrelevant to him! last i remember him hearing any expression of mine about racial impostor syndrome all he had to say was along the lines of 'you ARE black, though. you can't change that, it's in your blood', father trust me, i know that! i have known that and acknowledged that my whole life! unfortunately, this is not about fact alone, but about the ways emotional and societal values, perceptions, and functions impact the acceptance/acknowledgment/relevance/value of fact! fuck!!!