#thinking about Moon Sua the tears can’t stop flowing

[lilidawnonthemoon]

[sevendreamsofme-blog]

Dreamcatcher / Sua

Requested by anon

Characters: SuaxReader

Words: 4507

Here I go with another request. I really hope you will like it anon, I did several drafts because I got different ideas from your request. Tell me what you think. Also, I’m not one to write xReader this is my first attempt, so I apologise in advance. Everyone enjoy this and feel free to share your opinion

She was born this way. With this ability to go in people’s mind. She considered this a gift. That power had limits, only at night could Sua use it, and to sleeping people. In her own mind she considered herself a dreammaker. A girl here to make your mind lighter and joyful. As so no nightmares reached them.

Most nights she used her gift. To do so she had to be asleep too.

After a day at work, Sua was chilling on her couch with the tv on. Her eyes were more focused on the outside world. The night was settling. A deep shade of blue taking over. It was both eerie and beautiful. In those mesmerising moments, the calling was more intense than usual. A comforting warmth spreading over her body. Eyes closed she visualised herself floating surrounded by a colourful aura. It was decided.

Grabbing her plate from the coffee table she walked into her kitchen. She was living by herself, therefore there was not much to clean up after. Checking her front door was locked, Sua entered her bedroom. The curtains were open, the moon lighting up the place. Such a good atmosphere.

Sua changed into comfy clothes. Shorts and a t-shirt. Nothing more, that was pointless. Leaning in to turn on her nightstand lamp, a rubber band caught her attention. She grabbed it to tight up her shoulder length, brown hair into a messy bun. A bottle of water was already set, for when she would wake up.

Comfortably lying down on her bed, Sua happily hummed. With time it was easy to let herself go into this other world. After closing her eyes, she was welcomed into a vast space full of huge drawers piling up against the walls. In her burgundy flowing dress, she walked to her assigned section. On her way she crossed path with knowing faces, and by a nod she acknowledged them. This place was so fascinating. No amount of time could ever take that away.

Once in front of her personal drawers. She checked it was hers, only by moving her hand making a white shield appear. One step and she was inside. Even with years of coming here, nothing was ever safe. Darkness. Real darkness was always lurking around.

For a minute she observed each written names. Sua didn’t know them all. Some were there for a long time. Others only once before disappearing to be replaced. Flicking her right hand up, a flight of stairs appeared. Going up she stopped around the middle. Her hair were waving her face because of the slight breeze. The higher you went the windier it was. Gazing each names, she looked for a specific one. She moved the stairs to her left to reach it. In a beautiful handwriting was your name written. But moreso it was glowing, meaning you were asleep. Softly Sua’s hand grazed over it. Sighing she wondered if she should open it.

Unable to resist Sua open your drawer. White smoke escaped enveloping her in its embrace. It smelt like caramel. The sweetest aroma.

When the smoke was gone, Sua was surrounded by several scenes playing in front of her. They were all moving fast. It was always how it happened first. Whoever she was into, started by replaying their day. In that manner she had an idea about what to make of their dreams. Slowly the images faded away to start to mix themselves with desire, wistful wish. And Sua was there to create from this. But tonight she didn’t have to. She kept watching.

She was in your mind. She chose you, once again.

In a blink of an eye the setting changed. Smiling from ear to ear, Sua was blissfully happy. In a quick pace she walked to up to your silhouette. Each step brought her closer and closer. From a far away silhouette, you formed into a beautiful woman waiting for her. Sua felt it before you did. That tugging in your hearts. But when you did, your turned around, your hair floating down and your eyes twinkling.

“You’re here.” You whispered. It was always a shock for you to see Sua. “You’re here.” You said again before chuckling and moving toward her.

You collided into a tight hug. Sua’s arms wrapped around your waist. You did the same, moving your hands up and down her back.

“Caramel.” You heard her mumbled against your chest. Sua was slightly shorter than you, the perfect height.

“I wonder what you’d smell to me.” You pondered, not moving away from her yet. “You just feel like fresh air.” Sua chuckled looking up at you.

Arm in arm, you both walked around. The place was a reflection of your mind. A park. Something simple and where you used to go as a child. But not anymore. Choosing a path, you stayed silent. Sua wondered what was on your mind.

“Why did you come tonight?” You asked. Sua was close to you but you looked at the scenery instead of her. “It’s been a while.”

“I know.” Sua softly gripped your wrist, feeling what should be your beating heart in the real world. “You called for me.” She was right, at least your unconscious did.

“Did I?” This time you glanced at her, and she mesmerised you so much that you didn’t hear her answer. All you saw was her beauty. How her hair was more reddish than brown. You wondered if she dyed her hair. But also her huge smile that reflected the joy in her brown eyes. If you didn’t know better, you would think she was an angel.

“I can’t stay long.” This time you heard loud and clear. Gulping you nodded. “You’re my favourite dream.” Sua smiled then tugged your hand.

The time to walk back was what was left together. And it was heartbreaking. How short a dream was considering the amount of sleep you had every night. Why couldn’t you have eight hours straight with her? Defeated you tried to impregnate your mind of her, photograph her forever. She felt your eyes on you. She smirked but let you do it in peace. Every gestures was your own. But that didn’t stop her from feeling your heartbeat. The flush on your cheeks. The knots in your stomach. She told you once how she was connected to you, more than with anyone else. You were the only one calling for her, acknowledging her presence.

A blessing and a curse.

“I don’t want you to go.” You stopped her before the end of the path. “Tell me. Or let me tell you. Please.” You entwined both of your hands together, squeezing them lightly. “Please.”

“I’m breaking so many rules. I wish I could.” Sadly she smiled. Standing up on her tiptoes she grazed your cheek with her lips. A simple kiss. “Keep dreaming of me, okay? If you never forget me, I’ll always be here.”

As sweet as her whispery voice she evaporated. Your dream was over.

Sua blinked and there she was back on her stairs. Going down, the place was full of people. It was closing soon, and no one wanted to be trapped here. A gong resonated startling her. Quickly she flicked her hand down to close her shield behind her. Walking faster she reached the huge doors that were slowly closing. The moment she went through her eyes opened.

The sun was rising. Sua stayed still until she felt a tears rolling down her face, and with the back of her hand she wiped it. Turning around she grabbed her bottle of water. Her body was empty, exhausted. Most of the time she woke up sweating. Especially after visiting your dreams. These ones took a lot of her, but that never stopped her. For a whole minute she thought of you. Your voice. Your eyes. Everything. Until it was time to go on with her day. Gulping the last drop of water, she got up and threw it out in the bin.

Sua was a choreographer. Tiredness. Exhaustion. It wasn’t new to her. It required a lot of energy and time. Once in awhile she didn’t sleep. Too busy trying to come up with new dance moves.

Exactly like tonight. Some trainees were staying behind too, glancing at her. She had checked the time and she knew it was already dark outside. But there was no way she was going home. Even less to sleep. Flashes from last night started to plague her mind a few hours ago. For as long as she could she pushed them aside until it was all she could see. Her reflection in the mirror changed from her loose shirt with a sport bra and shorts, to a beautiful woman in a burgundy dress her hair down her shoulders.

“You okay?” Someone asked her. It took her by surprised. “You’ve been staring at yourself for a whole minute.” Sua looked at who interrupted her and sat down on the floor.

“Just tired.” She exhaled leaning on her elbows. “You came to practice Jiu, uh?”

“Yep.” Sua watched her stretch. “How’s your class going?” Jiu questioned.

“Not in the mood for new beginners today.” She sighed under Jiu’s giggling. “What?”

“You always have one of those days. Tomorrow will be better and you’ll be the first one to have fun with them.” She dared Sua to object then smiled. “Whatever you are dealing with you can forget about it for now. Come.” Jiu waved her hand. Sua obeyed and stood up.

Together they practiced a dance routine they knew by heart. Everyone else in the room watched them, struck by their moves. Four minutes of letting their bodies take over. When the song ended Sua jumped into Jiu’s arms screaming.

“Better?” Minji giggled.

“Yeah. Yeah!”

Sua was feeling good for now. She practiced a few more dances with Jiu and other trainees, who joined in instead of watching. Until she was really exhausted. By the time she arrived home it was past midnight. She cooked herself some ramen and ate on her couch observing the city outside.

That night Sua fell asleep quickly, no time to think about using her power. All she needed was sleep and let her body rest. She still had a quick thought about going, but doing it two days in row was something she decided not to do. No matter how much she loved visited dreams, and yours more particularly, there was always a risk.

For the rest of her week Sua was overwhelmed by work. And when she wasn’t there, she was chilling on her couch ready to sleep, or hanging out with Jiu.

On Sunday. After walking in town doing some shopping. Sua decided it was time to go back. Every inch of her, inside and out, was aching to be immersed. Tying her hair in a high ponytail she took a deep breath and laid down on her bed. Eyes closed she thought of you. Of your smile. Of your eyes. Feeling so close in her heart but yet so far.

When her eyes opened back she was once more in this other world. The place was busy, lots of people walking to their assigned drawers or leaving. For a minute she assessed herself. Her hair were down and wavy. The only change from last week was her dress. A deep, dark purple. She liked it. Smiling she walked to her drawers. Looking left and right, Sua raised her hand to lift the shield stepping inside. Asserting the names she was looking for yours. But as she was standing there, she felt no tugging. Raising her right hand to her heart she thought of you deeply, still no tugging. Her brows furrowed. That never happened before. Even the night she couldn’t meet you, there was always a tiny spark hiding somewhere.

That wasn’t possible to her. Shaking her head Sua tried again, concentrating even more. Nothing.

Her heart was empty.

Lifting up her left hand, stairs appeared. Barefoot she climbed them, always a hand on her heart. Every name was scanned carefully. Reaching the top she gasped. Your name. It was there. Barely.

“No. No.” She whispered. She traced the fading letters. “Think of me. Please. Please.” Yet your name was still disappearing.

In a brusque movement Sua opened your drawers. As expected no white smoke enveloped her. Falling on her knees she thought about what was happening. The top was a place she rarely went to. It meant the people there didn’t need her anymore, they weren’t a priority. Or they died.

The strong wind was slapping her face but she couldn’t care less. Hiding her head on her lap she stayed still.

She thought of the first time she saw you.

The first time you acknowledged her presence.

The first time you hugged her.

The first time she kissed your cheek.

These memories were cherished. They were written in her journal. You were the only one she dared showing herself to. And now you were gone.

“What did you do?” Of course you couldn’t reply. There had to be a reasonable explanation.

Rising up, she turned around to sat on the stairs, her feet anxiously shaking. She knew she had break the rules by talking to you. But it had been a while since it happened. It made no sense for it to be now.

“What did I do?” Sua was starting to blame herself. For a week she hadn’t visited. She promised she would be there if you’d call for her. “I’m sorry.” She sniffed.

Step by step she got down the stairs. The whole way down she had to have a strong hold on the bannister to not trip. Flicking her hand down, the stairs vanished. A last glance at the drawers and she opened the shield to leave.

Tonight she had no desire to visit anyone’s dream. No one needed her. No one called for her.

Gathering up her dress Sua ran. Away from her shattered hope. Hope she never realised was that huge. The doors were so close, yet it felt like a long way to reach them. She had barely stepped them that her eyes opened.

Sua woke up gasping for air. Her hand over her heart, which was beating so fast it could pump out of her chest. Fixing her ceiling, illuminated by the moon, she tried to calm herself down. Slowly her breathing evened. Glancing at her window she was not surprised it was still dark outside. There had been no reason to stay.

Massaging her chest Sua got out of her bed to her desk. Her notebook was open with no date. She wondered if her entry to the world had been taken into account, even if she had not step into anyone’s dreams. With a heavy thump she took a seat on her chair and laid her head down the desk. Her left hand untangled her hair and she played with it. They were a little bit shorter here. Less silky. Less perfect. Because everything was perfect out there. In your dreams.

She missed you.

Tugging it behind her ear, she turned the pages of her notebook and looked for the first entry. Since she couldn’t get to you, she was looking for you somewhere else.

“Where are you?” She whispered. Each words she was reading were hurtful. In a way of making her nostalgic. Sad. Straightening herself she kept reading. Until the sun rose up.

When she was done tears were rolling down her face, wetting the last written page. For a minute she was still. Frozen.

Then a screeching scream echoed in her bedroom. Her tiny body slid down the floor from her chair. And she kept screaming. The memories. The aching. The realisation.

Sua was only realising now what that tugging in her heart was. Reading all those moments spent with you, light up a new perspective. Always focusing on separating her two worlds she blinded herself to her own heart. To what she was feeling for you. Only now the pain intensified.

“It can’t be. How?” She knew there was no logical answer. And she sighed defeated because it could never be anyway. You and her.

Harshly Sua wiped her tears with the back of her hand. Her notebook was next and she slammed it close. That still wasn’t enough. Looking for her phone she saw it was barely five in the morning. It didn’t stop her from changing her clothes, grabbing her stuffs and close the door of her apartment behind her.

The wind slapped her face and she welcomed it. The town was half asleep. She walked around the neighborhood, passing by a few open convenience stores. For almost an hour she strolled around with no goal, only a glimmer of hope to clear her mind. At some point she stopped on a bridge looking over the river. It looked so calm and resting. Until the wind peaked up and the water flowed dangerously. Just like her. One second she was overwhelmed by the memory of your arms around her, of your caramel scent. And the next she hated herself for showing her true nature to you, consciously knowing it was a dead end. This walk didn’t give her any answers.

On her way back Sua stopped by a coffee shop. A nice caramel coffee was needed to comfort her a little bit. Her beverage in hand she was ready to leave the place when a young couple entered at the same time. Stumbling upon her feet, her eyes locked onto them. Sua felt herself falling down a dark hole.

Is that what it was? To be in love.

What felt like an hour, in reality was only a few seconds. Passing them by she envied them. At this moment she realised she had to take her fate into her own hands. Sipping her hot coffee Sua thought over of the little knowledge she had of her magical word. An answer was somewhere. She just had to dig it up. For you.

No plan was formed. But the only thing she knew was to keep going back to the dreamworld. For a week Sua let herself back there. Every night disappearing to look for you. Still finding your name up the shelf, half faded. But she kept coming, trying to not be beaten down by the fact you were obviously not calling for her. As long as your name was written, nothing was lost.

After a while she realised her dress was not changing colour. Always a deep purple. She wondered if it meant something. Never did she pay attention to this.

Another week passed by. Yet you were still not there. And every night she drained herself off her energy.

Of course she was still determined but there was so much she could so from her side. Sua wondered if she what she read about all your encounter was right. Or did she transferred her own feelings. But she believed she was right, she knew you.

Another night ready to go into the other world. Sua crossed her fingers on her bed then closed her eyes.

Standing in front of the colossal door Sua analyzed her dress. Still a deep purple. Then she guessed she won’t see you. Anyway she still did her routine just like every other night. The stairs appeared. Barely walking up that she saw the glow. This golden light illuminating your name. Not missing a beat Sua reached for your drawer. Once it was open the familiar smoke embraced her.

A smile on her face Sua was exciting to witness your day. The moment she saw your face her ache softly weighted down. It played so fast for her to catch everything. When it was done the setting changed. Only you could choose and it was the park once again. You really cherished this place.

Stepping barefoot on the path Sua looked for you. When your silhouette appeared a few feet away, her feet bolted up running toward. She struggled with her flowing dress but she was so happy to have you back. Five seconds later your bodies entangled around each other. Sua was laughing.

“You’re here.” She whispered against your chest before moving away. “I can’t believe it.” Her voice was louder than usual, result of her excitement. She kept giggling.

You hugged her back. Enveloping her tiny frame full of joy. She was a breath of fresh air. Three weeks was a long time without seeing each other in your dreams. When she moved back, her eyes looked up at you. Her all face lit up. Eyes wide open twinkling. Her smile showing off her teeth. What a sight.

“What?” She asked seeing you bite your bottom lip. “Aren’t you happy?”

“Of course I am!” You answered quickly.

“But?” Sua raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t call for me.” Her whole demeanor changed. She was on the defensive. “Why?” She took a step back.

“I- I needed time to think.” You looked down feeling her burning stare.

“How? How did you stay away from your dreams?” Glancing at her you were taken aback by that question. Her stare was turning dark with a blank face. You realised she was pulling her walls up.

“Sleeping pills.” Sua nodded. Her eyes averted for a second. “I- Sua.” She looked back at you. A barely softer glare this time. “This may sound dumb, but- Okay look.”

You unbuttoned your shirt, leaving you with only a beige t-shirt. Braving yourself you raised your right arm, showing the inside of your bicep. Uncertainty was making you tremble. Still you dared to look at Sua. Her reaction will be the answers to all your hidden questions.

Sua watched every one of your movements, totally lost. When your skin was free of clothes, she gasped raising her hands to her mouth.

“It’s beautiful.” Step by step she walked closer to you. Her right hand touched your skin, tracing the dark lines. “Is that me?” You nodded. Staring too at the tattoo you did. Sua’s silhouette was inked into your skin. Her flawless frame, floating around in her dress.

Her fingers trailed down to your hand, squeezing it hard.

“You didn’t have to leave for this.” Sua shook her head. “I told you I was real.”

“I know. But you don’t know how it is to wake up and feel like it was a dream. No matter how much you told me you were real. You created my dreams. It didn’t make that much sense.” Sua listened carefully to your words. This was a new side of you. “And this tugging.” Still gripping your hand she touched your chest above your heart. “Do you- Did you ever feel it?” There was hesitation in your voice.

“The last time we saw each other, it took me a week to come back. You weren’t there, and when I woke up my heart was aching.” Her eyes locked with yours. “For you.” Your own heart started to beat faster. “I never realised what this tugging meant until you were gone.”

“I’m sorry.” You took her in your arms. “It was just so hard to know what was real or not. And then I decided that even if you were a dream I’d still have a piece of you. My beautiful dream.” Her hands on your shoulders she tiptoed to kiss your cheek. Her lips were so soft and sweet. Her chuckling reached your ears, blessing them with purity.

“You are my dream.” The sound of her voice was so light and happy it warm you. You couldn’t believe what she was telling you. Never did you thought it could be a possibility. Yet there you were. Sua in your arms smiling like never before. A tint of blush on her cheeks.

In a sync movement you moved your heads towards each other. Her eyes closed, but not yours. This was something to always remember. You reached for her neck.

She screamed.

Sua’s body lurched back.

“Your dress.”

“Your hand.”

You both spoke up at the same time. Looking down your left hand was glowing a red halo.

Sua saw her dress. The deep purple was turning black. Then a menacing red was taking over. From the bottom it moved up. But even moreso, flames were created burning it down. So much it grazed Sua’s skin. Her screams were louder and louder. The flames were growing fast.

Immediately you moved forward to try to help her in any way possible.

“No!” Sua hurled seeing you coming to her. “Don’t” yet you didn’t listen and kept going. “Stop!” This time her right hand flicked up creating a shield stopping you from coming closer.

“Sua. Get that shield down!” You were hitting it, no matter how useless it was. “What is happening? Sua!” Even your yelling was not loud enough to cover her painful screams.

“I told you!” She could barely speak between her screams. “No one can ever know.” She fell on her knees, the flames burning her hands. “Never come back. I’m sorry.”

Your fists were still smashing against her invisible shield. There was nothing you could do for her. She was being destroyed in front of your eyes. You knew it was your fault. You made her a reality to your own real world. Your worlds collided.

“I’m sorry.” You whispered holding up your tears.

For a long time you thought she was an illusion. That your feelings for her were dreams. But they never disappeared in your daily life. A soft aching when you felt the early morning fresh air. Your reminder that you loved her.

“Sua!” She weakly raised her head. “Come to me, please.” Her stare was blank. But her teary eyes said otherwise. “Come to me, please!” You repeated yourself strongly. This time she nodded.

Sua let her body fall down in the middle of the path. The front of her dress had burnt down, leaving her legs bare. Something dark was holding her down, forcing her to submit. To let down her guard. Her screams had died down for a minute, until a screeching pain reached her head. Her body arched. Then her hands reached for her neck, she couldn’t breathe anymore. A second later she gasped for air, coughing a lot. And she felt it.

A choker on her neck.

Sua was defeated.

Lifting her hand up and down she put the shield down. A second later she felt your hands cupping her face. Your touch burnt your hands and she whined in agony. Tears were running down your face onto her cheeks, so you moved your hands away. It was now or never. Not wasting time you kissed her. A beautiful pain. Both of you endured. Burning for each other was worth it.

Sua tasted like vanilla. The perfect mix.

“It’s not over.” You said against her lips. Then you leaned near her ear whispering.

Another scream.