#they're very minor references but please read with caution

[aseplant]

welp. on god najin it's therapy time (:

There are many benefits to being the Child of Fire. Najin would know—because after discovering that time rewinds after his death, he’s determined to use his pseudo-immortality to save his brother. The universe, however, does not appreciate being blackmailed. —Najin versus god and the lesson he refuses to learn.

Between Najin’s last breath and the next, he wakes.

In a space that is darker than night, Najin meets a being made of smoke and light. It is so powerful that he can’t quite perceive it; it is so powerful that it hurts to breathe in its presence—not, of course, that he needs to. He knows he died on Rune’s sword, his body left to hang on the wall as a lesson for future traitors.

“Child of Fire,” the being muses. “Here so soon.”

He narrows his eyes, shifts his center of gravity. “And what are you?”

The being taps its chin. “A difficult question indeed… Others like you have called me god, but I don’t suppose that would garner any more respect from you.”

Of course not. There is exactly one person in this stupid world who matters, and this haze is most certainly not Nagyunn. “Where are we?”

“In between realities,” it says. “Waiting.”

“For what?”

It tilts its head. It sighs.

“Oh, Najin. You already know.”

He takes a step forward, reaching for a sword that is no longer there. “What d—”

A soft voice. “Jin-ah?”

Najin’s blood runs cold.

He turns. A face exactly like his, eyes wide with confusion, blood marring his shirt.

“There you are, Jin-ah! I was looking for you! The knight said you’d finished training already, but when—”

There’s a roaring in his ears drowning out the rest of Nagyunn’s excited chatter. He turns his attention back on the being, fists clenched, snarls, “Send him back.”

“It is not my place to interfere,” the being says apathetically. “I am but the overseer.”

Najin takes a step forward, both a threat and a promise.

The being remains unconcerned. Its loss.

“Besides…”

Najin is fifteen, with enough hubris to challenge god and just enough skill to pull it off.

“…you will have another chance to protect him.”

He draws his sword.

“Have some patience.”

In this not-quite-reality space, it forms in his grasp mid-swing, white wisps curling into the shape of that which killed him: half-dream, half-memory.

The being stops him with a single finger.

“Now, really, there is no need for that,” it says. “You will rise again, Child of Fire. Such is your nature. Take better care of him this time, hm?”

Najin pulls back his unoccupied fist—

—and Najin wakes.

It is currently eight o’clock. He feels as if he has just woken from a long, vivid dream.

But groggy as he feels, Najin knows he can’t afford to simply brush it off. Nagyunn died in his dream. If there’s any chance at all that was real, then he’s not risking Nagyunn again.

Unfortunately, it seems that Nagyunn has already left for work. Najin knows, from the sword, that Rune killed him in his dream—yesterday—today? So his cover is probably blown, and they’re probably trying to kill him and Nagyunn because they can’t tell them apart.

His plan is simple, then: get Nagyunn from work, pack some bags, skip town. Easy.

…or not.

(He dies on the way to Nagyunn four times.)

On the fifth time, Najin gets annoyed and decides to ambush the masked Dragon’s Descendants who keep ambushing him.

Also a failure. He dies two more times.

In the space between dying and waking, he continues to meet god.

“Seems you’ve had no luck this time either,” it says. “Perhaps a different approach is in order?”

Najin eyes it. He’s had suspiciously bad luck enroute to tracking down Nagyunn, and he can’t help but wonder if there’s been some… divine intervention. Maybe it’s mad because he attacked it that first time?

“Rest assured that your misfortune has little to do with me,” the being says, as if reading his mind. “I cannot interfere, only watch.”

“Then how do they keep finding me before I can find Nagyunn?” he snaps.

“Well…” the being contorts its face, clearly at odds with itself. “I suppose something like that wouldn’t hurt. Let’s say you were tracking someone, intending to kill them when they arrived home, but they kept deviating from their expected schedule…”

“…oh. Oh yeah.”

That makes sense.

Najin wakes.

He goes to training this time. Even though his whole body is itching to take off, go find Nagyunn and take him out of town, he stays the whole time, listening to Fadiyan’s antics and Luzian and Ruth’s dumbassery. When class dismisses he heads down to the town square, where Nagyunn is sure to pass through no matter where he was working today, and when his brother comes by Najin greets him with a big smile and subtly ushers him home.

“Is something the matter, Najin?” Nagyunn asks.

Well, maybe not so subtly.

“No,” he lies smoothly. “Why?”

“You just seem… hm, I don’t know, antsy? Did training not go well?”

“Oh, you know Fadiyan,” Najin says. “Always doing whatever she wants, even though the test is coming up so soon. But, umm”—inspiration strikes—“I was thinking, she said she was gonna be visiting a friend on Monday, so we basically have three days off. Do you wanna go on a trip together?”

Nagyunn’s eyes light up. “That sounds fun! But… I don’t really think I can be gone from work that long…”

Ugh, curse his responsible older brother instincts.

Najin plasters on the saddest face he can muster. “Oh, okay… but this might be our last chance before I become an apprentice…”

“Wow, someone’s confident he’s going to pass,” Nagyunn laughs.

Najin squares his shoulders haughtily. “But of course. Who else would they pick?”

Nagyunn musses his hair affectionately. “You know what, you’re right. I’ve deeply underestimated our village’s genius… I must pay for this sin with death! All hail Najin!”

“Stop that,” he laughs, batting his twin’s hand away. “Is that a yes, then? We should pac—”

It’s only by coincidence that Nagyunn reaches the door first.

It’s only because Najin is too relaxed, high on the relief of finally meeting up with Nagyunn after so many attempts at today, that he doesn’t react in time.

It’s only because they’re twins, because Fadiyan gave him that stupid assignment—no, because Najin wasn’t good enough at his job, because—

“Ah, no good, that one was Nagyunn,” someone says.

—well.

Excuses won’t bring back Nagyunn. Excuses won’t erase the sight of that sword tip plunging cleanly into Nagyunn’s eye, the memory of the blood spray when it pulled back out, the sickening way his body fell to the floor.

But Najin kind of knows how this works by now, so he stands still when the next strike comes, and then there is only darkness.

The being does not come to greet him this time. Najin doesn’t know if it’s respect, or guilt, or something else. He finds he doesn’t actually care.

In the abyss, the last few moments of his life replay over and over. The sword. The expression on Nagyunn’s face when it came out. The river of blood where his left eye should have been. The heaviness of his corpse in Najin’s arms.

If he still had physical form, Najin suspects he would have been sick. But there is only him in this space between death and waking.

Najin wakes. He sits up, feeling strange and out of place in his own body.

(Nagyunn’s weight presses on his arms.)

He lurches to the bathroom and is violently ill.

When his stomach settles again, he takes a deep breath. He has a sip of water.

(The sword pulls out of Nagyunn’s eye, spraying blood and other viscous fluids.)

He grits his teeth, wipes the cold sweat from his forehead, and goes to training. Nagyunn was safe until he went to pick him up last time. He’ll be okay this time too, then. Najin will just be more careful when they get back. He knows what’s coming, and he knows how to fight.

He’ll kill those people if it’s the last thing he does. He’ll save Nagyunn. He will break this cycle.

(He does not.)

The fifth time Nagyunn dies in his arms, the masked group doesn’t touch him, so Najin finishes the job for them.

The being is waiting for him in the in-between space, as it has been for almost all of his deaths. It has not tried to talk to him since Nagyunn’s first death, and Najin has not bothered to say anything either.

Today, he has had enough of this.

In his hand materializes a sword, foamy dream and memory and burning with red-hot anger.

“Leave Nagyunn alone,” Najin hisses, “you sick bastard—”

“Your anger will change nothing,” it says. “Your choices have led here. Your choices will lead you back here if you continue the same path.”

He swings into nothingness.

Najin wakes.

He dies in Nagyunn’s stead. He wakes.

He dies in Nagyunn’s stead twice. He fights god. He wakes.

He dies in Nagyunn’s stead four times. Five. Seven. Ten. Fifteen. Twenty-seven. He loses count.

He fights god.

He wakes.

Najin takes a different route home. He stops going home. He skips training. He suggests they go visit Lauzun.

Nagyunn dies. If the masked group doesn’t kill him too, then Najin brings a sword to his own neck. He will not leave this day without Nagyunn.

The being is waiting for him, hazy and ethereal and unconcerned by any of Najin’s attacks.

On his next death, he does not attack it.

It says, with clear certainty, “You wanted to ask me something.”

“Why does he keep dying?”

“Because he was not intended to survive past today,” it says simply.

Ah. That’s one suspicion confirmed, at least.

“Through sheer tenacity, you have exploited the world’s gift to you to extend your brother’s lifespan,” the being says. “Admirable, truly. But I have told you: your choices will continue to lead you here if you stay on this path.”

“How do I get off this path?”

“I cannot help you,” it says simply. “But perhaps there are others who could.”

…right.

Of course, it’s so simple. He’ll just tell Fadiyan about the problem, and surely between the two of them they’ll be strong enough to take on—

Nagyunn dies.

Unfeelingly, unflinchingly, Najin brings the sword to his neck as well, Fadiyan’s alarm fading into the background.

“Back again, Child of Fire,” the being sighs.

Najin tries to punch it again for good measure.

Najin wakes.

The numbness sets in before the hopelessness. He stops getting sick after Nagyunn’s deaths. He stops hesitating before beginning the cycle anew. He wakes.

Even once the hopelessness starts to set in, even when he loses count of how many deaths he’s had, even as he slowly begins to accept that he’ll probably be stuck in this loop of yesterdays forever, at least he never loses sight of his desperation to save Nagyunn. So even though the exhaustion sinks in so deep that his bones ache at the thought of getting up, Najin continues to force himself out of bed again and again and again.

He leaves training early. The masked group is still waiting for them when they get home. He tries to get Nagyunn to leave with him without going home. Nagyunn finds this wildly irresponsible, reckless, and terrifyingly out of character, so he refuses to come. He tries to bring their things with him to training. Rune must have spies on him, or perhaps even a mole within the knights-in-training, because he is killed on his way to find Nagyunn after work.

Najin wakes. He forces himself up. He tries again.

He’s gotten pretty good at lying to Nagyunn over the years, ever since he joined the Dragon’s Descendants. In all these repeats, Nagyunn has never truly questioned him. But the weariness starts to weigh his feet down, and although he tries to maintain a happy face for Nagyunn,  it’s so, so hard, and his brother is so, so perceptive.

All he says is: “Hey, Jin-ah, is everything alright? You don’t look so good…”

Just a gentle hand on his shoulder, a worried furrow to his eye.

It’s such a small action. On any other day, Najin would simply shrug him off and give him a sunny smile, and that’s exactly what he intends to do now—

But instead, Najin, to his horror, starts crying.

Nagyunn is also horrified. Probably for different reasons. “Najin? Oh my god, what’s wrong? Are you hurt somewhere? What’s—”

Najin shakes his head and tries to speak, but all that comes out is a wet, choked noise. Fuck.

He gives up and pulls Nagyunn into a hug instead.

Clearly bewildered, Nagyunn pats his back awkwardly. “Was—was it training? Did someone do something to you? I’ll kick their ass, Jin-ah, it’s okay, please don’t cry.”

“I’m tired of watching you die,” he hiccups into his twin’s shoulder.

“Oh, Jin-ah, I’m here for you now,” Nagyunn says. “Did something happen? Did you have a bad dream last night?”

“No,” he sighs. He slumps further into Nagyunn’s embrace, forcing his brother to bear most of their weights. “I just… forget it.”

It’s not like he can just tell Nagyunn the truth. The day will probably start over soon, for one reason or another. He’ll just count this one a wash. Maybe he’ll manage to save him in the next one.

“What? Hey, don’t say that.” Nagyunn pulls back, forcing Najin to look him in the eye. “Jin-ah. Tell me what’s wrong.”

He looks away. “You wouldn’t believe me anyway.”

“Why wouldn’t I? No matter what happens, I’ll always believe you. So just tell me.”

“Well, nothing happened. Still going to say you believe me?”

“Jiiiiiiiiiiiin-ahhh.” Nagyunn pinches his cheek.

“Ow ow ow, hey!”

“Tell me what’s wrong,” he says. “It’s clearly not nothing. Why are you hiding things from me all of a sudden?”

I’ve been hiding things from you for years, he does not say.

“It’s really nothing,” he grumbles. “I’ll figure it out, so don’t worry about it.”

Nagyunn swats him on the head. “What the hell does that mean? Najin, I’m your older brother. I’m supposed to protect you, and—”

He shoves Nagyunn’s hand away. “I’m better at fighting than you are anyway.”

Nagyunn narrows his eyes. “Oh? So it’s a person who’s bothering you, then? Or—no, you’re basically the strongest one in this village except for your teacher. So a group of people?”

Fuck, why is he so perceptive. “No. I said nothing.”

“Najin.”

“Look, just leave me alone, okay? It has nothing to do with you anyway—”

“—you started crying Najin, in the middle of the street, how am I supposed to just ignore that—”

“—okay, wow, sure, just go ahead and bring that up—”

“—don’t try to distract me, Najin, just tell me what’s wrong—”

“I told you there’s nothing!” he snaps. “Stop trying to get involved in every aspect of my life! I just—have a lot on my plate, with the apprenticeship exam coming up, and the last thing I need is you butting your head into things when you can’t even fight that well, and…”

Nagyunn has an odd look on his face.

Najin’s anger and stress evaporates instantaneously.

“…never mind, I’m sorry, Gyunn-ah, I was just saying whatever came to mind, please don’t be mad at me…”

“You didn’t have anything on your mind at all last night,” Nagyunn says slowly. “Where did all this come from?”

“…uh, test nerves?”

“You say I keep dying, even though I’ve been at work all day, and now you won’t elaborate because you’re trying to protect me from something. I didn’t tell you where I’d be today, but you came to find me right after work anyway. You seem—dead on your feet, honestly, but you were fine last night. You didn’t think I’d believe you if you told the truth.”

“Um,” Najin says. Nagyunn’s always been smart, of course, but this is getting kind of scary. “I just… you know…”

“What did we have for dinner last night?”

Najin opens his mouth, then sighs and rubs his eyes.

“See?” Nagyunn says gently. “That wasn’t so bad. And I believe you. So let me help you, Jin-ah.”

“…Alright,” Najin says. “I guess two heads are better than one.”

“Exactly!” Nagyunn smiles. “So do you know what triggers a loop?”

“One of us dying.” Sort of.

“And what have you tried so far?”

Najin rattles off a quick list.

“Hm, I can see why I wouldn’t have gone with you… let’s see… what did Fadiyan ask you to do, exactly?”

“Just—take out some bandits.”

Nagyunn narrows his eyes. “…I know you’re lying, Najin. I hope that wasn’t important information.”

“It’s not.”

“Can I assume that you can get Fadiyan to help us, then?”

“Yes.”

“Okay,” Nagyunn says. “Well then. They must have someone watching you, because they know to go after you alone when you deviate from your schedule, so they must have seen you leave training at the usual time. They’re probably already waiting for us at home, but when we don’t arrive soon they’ll come looking for us. Let’s go ask Fadiyan for help for now. Do you know where she is?”

“She’ll still be near the training grounds,” Najin says, automatically beginning to lead the way, “but if we stay too long, they’ll try to use you to lure me out.”

Nagyunn falls in step with him. “Then we’ll move somewhere else. I guess you keep trying to talk to her without me overhearing? But now that I’m going with you while knowing the full story, it shouldn’t be too hard to fill her in and move to somewhere harder to find us. Then we persuade her to let us stay with her overnight. That’ll give us some time to think about tomorrow.”

“…right,” Najin says. That makes sense. “You’re so smart, Jin-ah.”

“Well one of us has to be,” Nagyunn laughs. “Cuz it isn’t you.”

Najin feels the corners of his lips quirking up, his first genuine smile in a long, long time. He feels foolish now. After going undercover and keeping his secrets for so long, he’d forgotten how much easier things are with Nagyunn around.

“Alright, I’ll talk to Fadiyan. You just stick near me, okay?”

“I’ll be by your side the whole time,” Nagyunn promises.

Najin wants to believe it, but he knows better by now.

Still, Nagyunn’s plan is as solid as any that he’s tried at this point, so Najin carries it out faithfully. Together, they locate Fadiyan, and he asks her to move to a more private place. He tells her his assignment has been exposed, and that he and Nagyunn are both in danger now. He lays it on as thick as he can—Nagyunn’s only a civilian, but he’s in danger now too—until Fadiyan finally says, “Aw, kid. You don’t have to phrase it like that. I get it, you’re worried. I’ll take responsibility for this. What is it you want from me?”

“Let us stay with you tonight,” Nagyunn says quietly. “You’re a knight. Surely no matter how powerful this group is, they’ll think twice before attacking you in your own home.”

Fadiyan turns to him, eyes bright.

Ugh, catching her interest is never a good thing. Najin resists the urge to step in front of his brother protectively.

“So you’re Nagyunn then,” she says. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Nagyunn shows no reaction. “So?”

“Well, I don’t think I’m supposed to show favoritism like that,” she sighs, “but I guess these are special circumstances. Come along then. Let’s get you guys somewhere safe.”

Najin tries to squash the flutterings of hope in his stomach. “Thank you.”

“Wow, I don’t think you’ve ever been this polite with me,” Fadiyan says. “Your brother is such a good influence on you. I should’ve asked to meet him sooner…”

Najin narrows his eyes. He lowers his voice and hisses, “Hey. Don’t even think about it. Nagyunn’s not good at fighting.”

“Ah, but I have a colleague like that,” Fadiyan says brightly. “There’s still plenty he could do.”

“No,” Najin says.

“Well,” she says with a sidelong glance at Nagyunn, who’s starting to take interest in their whispered conversation, “I think that’s for him to decide, isn’t it? Besides, think about it. You came to me because the knights are the safest to be with now that your cover’s blown. You think that’ll change anytime soon?”

Najin stops short, glare murderous. “What’re you suggesting?”

Nagyunn puts a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Najin? What’s going on?”

Fadiyan glances at him. “I don’t know how much Najin has told you, but if what he’s told me is true, it isn’t safe for either of you to stay in this village anymore. But, lucky you—the apprenticeship exam is next week! Fast way to get out, if you ask me, and you’d be under the knights’ protection. Pretty sweet deal, don’t you think?”

Nagyunn tilts his head. “Do you really think I could pass the exam?”

“We-ell,” Fadiyan says, “that remains to be seen.”

“And you’re encouraging this because?”

“Because she thinks you’d be useful,” Najin spits out. “Don’t listen to her, Gyunn-ah. We’ll figure out something else.”

Fadiyan waves him off. “Sure, sure, whatever you want. But let’s keep walking, hm?”

Najin begrudgingly begins following her again.

Curse her for planting the thought in Nagyunn’s head at all. Behind him, he can sense the gears start to turn in his brother’s brain.

Against all odds, Najin wakes to the crow call and jingle of the weekend peddlers, come from afar to sell their wares. It used to be a signal to go back to bed because Fadiyan doesn’t conduct training on weekends, but it’s the first time he’s heard it in weeks, and it feels almost bizarre now. He’d never thought he’d miss it.

Wait.

He bolts upright. Nagyunn—

“I’m right here, Jin-ah,” Nagyunn says, rolling over in his pile of blankets. “You okay?”

“…Yeah,” Najin says. “Of course.”

Nagyunn searches his face for a moment, then smiles. “I’m glad. You passed out really early last night—”

Fuck, he’d meant to keep watch for any unexpected occurrences.

“—but it makes since, all things considered, y’know? Anyway, I talked a bit with Fadiyan last night, and—”

“You shouldn’t listen to her,” Najin says automatically.

Nagyunn sighs. “I know you’re hesitant, but it really does just make the most sense. Provided I can pass the exam, of course… she wouldn’t tell me anything about that, so we’ll just have to wait and see, I guess.”

“I don’t like it,” Najin insists.

“Really?” Nagyunn says, pretending to pout. “But I thought you’d be happy to spend more time with me. If we both get in, we’d get to see each other everyday.”

“It’s not like that,” Najin says. “It’s just…”

…that Nagyunn will never be able to achieve the level of strength that Najin has, but because they’re twins, everyone will either treat him terribly or throw him into danger anyway, expecting it to work out. And if that gleam in Fadiyan’s eyes is anything to go by…

“Well, do you have any other suggestions then?” Nagyunn asks. “I don’t mind either way, but it’s not like you can just drop out and go adventuring—”

“Yes I could,” Najin says immediately.

Nagyunn levels an unimpressed stare. “Come on Najin, be serious. I’m not going to ask you to give up your dream—or even just, that stable of a future—because of something like this.”

“…you say that like this is just—just some small bump in the road,” Najin says.

Nagyunn winces. “Jin-ah, we can’t let this one thing derail your entire future—”

“Okay, and then what about you?” he says. “Do you—do you not—”

Embarrassingly, his breath hitches, and Nagyunn’s face immediately softens. “Oh, Jin-ah, I’m sorry. I know that yesterday—”

“You know, but you don’t understand,” Najin snaps, eyes stinging with angry tears. “Do you realize how many times I watched you die? But all you’re worried about is me—”

“I mean, I don’t even remember it, so of course I’m worried about y—”

“—you dummy,” Najin sniffs, “worry about yourselffor once, and, and n-now Fadiyan’s gone and convinced you that joining the knights would be safer for you, like they wouldn’t throw you into danger in a heartbeat, and—I… I just want you to be safe, Nagyunn.”

Nagyunn pats his hands reassuringly. “I didn’t mean to dismiss your feelings like that. I’m sorry. I still think joining the knights would be our best option, but if you’re that against it… we could join an adventuring group together?”

That sounds much better than putting Nagyunn in the gaze of schemers like Fadiyan, and whatever other knights are going to be out there, watching the rising star and his twin.

“Yes,” he sniffs. “I do like that plan better.”

“Okay,” Nagyunn says easily, “then we’ll do that. Although… I still think we’ll get out of here faster if we take the apprenticeship exam next week. What do you think?”

“…okay. Just for a bit,” Najin mumbles. “We can train a bit until then. I’ll ask Fadiyan. I’m sure she’ll want to help you.”

Nagyunn grins. “Sure. Look at that! Everything’s settled. We’re in this together, so there’s no need to stress about everything on your own, alright?”

“Alright,” Najin echoes.

Nagyunn reaches up and wipes a stray tear away. “Man, I haven’t seen this side of you in a while.”

The crying, he means. Najin buries his face in his brother’s shoulder and mumbles, “shut up.”

Nagyunn laughs softly.

“It’s okay,” he says. “Your big brother’s here for you. Always.”

He holds him tighter. Yes, he will be. As long as Najin has the power to start over, he’ll kill himself as many times as he needs to to keep Nagyunn safe and sound.

“You better be,” Najin grumbles.

The apprenticeship exam turns out to be a group exam, which is hilariously trivial in the face of Nagyunn’s brilliance and Najin’s fighting prowess. Nagyunn simply observes on the first day, his presence and combat capabilities so weak that Ludika barely even glances his way.

On the second day, two Najins show up. Najin had agreed to this, of course, had even helped Nagyunn cut his hair, but that doesn’t help calm him at all when Ludika goes after the wrong person and he lunges for them both, heart in his throat—

—but Fadiyan parries the attack at the last minute.

“Come on, Ludi, you’ll really kill him if you do that,” she tuts.

Najin releases a shaky breath. God, this is why he hadn’t wanted Nagyunn to join the knights. He’s hung around Fadiyan long enough to know that none of these people are sane.

But it seems he can trust Fadiyan to keep an eye on Nagyunn for now, so he clenches his fists, steels himself, and barks out new orders to the rest of the knights-in-training.

It’s just for a bit, he reminds himself. This is only going to be long enough to get out of Woodion safely and find a safer place to stay.

They pass the exam, of course. With flying colors.

They stay with Fadiyan for two more weeks before Ludika up and disappears on them. And just like that, they leave Woodion behind.

After a dismal performance on their tracking assignment, they regroup with Ludika and a bunch of new faces in the middle of nowhere. Marsha is already there, to no one’s surprise, and she declares in front of everyone that she’d like his babies.

Insanity.

“No way in hell,” Najin scowls.

Nagyunn looks absolutely shell-shocked.

“Jin-ah…” he says, eyes lightless.

“Ugh, it’s not like that,” Najin sighs.

Marsha eyes him curiously. “And who are you?”

Najin slings an arm around him protectively and tells her, quite politely, to fuck off.

Thankfully, the knights begin class before Marsha can escalate things further.

It’s not quite possible for Najin to keep his head down, but Nagyunn agrees to attract as little attention as possible while they’re with the knights. His complete lack of talent for combat is balanced out enough by his quick thinking that most of the knights pay him no mind, instead focusing on Najin’s overwhelmingly visible strength—which is exactly how Najin prefers it. No chance of Nagyunn getting caught up in something weird if none of the knights will give him the time of day.

But somehow, despite both their efforts…

“—and Qilin Squad will be composed of Nagyunn, Nuljin, Ruth, and Yulnia,” the administrator announces.

…Nagyunn still manages to catch the eye of that bastard.

Najin clenches his fists, thoughts racing. Then:

“How does that make any sense?” he asks as obnoxiously as possible.

The administrator blinks, clearly taken aback. “Um… w-well, that was decided among the knights, so…”

“Watch your tone, Najin,” Ludika snaps.

Najin ignores her and pivots on his heel, intending to see if he can annoy Zius into leaving Nagyunn alone.

As if summoned, Zius comes over of his own accord.

“Nagyunn’s not strong and neither are you,” Najin tells him bluntly. “Ruth isn’t that strong either, for that matter. What kind of squad did you assemble?”

“I chose Nagyunn because he’s good at thinking on his feet. I think his keen insights—”

“Isn’t that what you’re for?”

Zius raises an eyebrow subtly. “…Najin. Is there a reason you’re being so hostile right now? It’s well within my rights to choose who I want on my squad.”

A hand touches his elbow.

“Jin-ah,” Nagyunn says. “Come with me for a second?”

He complies, begrudgingly, but not before shooting one last glare at Zius.

“I thought we agreed not to stir up any unnecessary trouble,” Nagyunn reminds him gently. “That means avoiding picking fights with the knights, even the weak one.”

“I wasn’t picking a fight with him—”

“You were about to tell him to go kill himself.”

“Well, he had it coming.”

Nagyunn sighs. “Look, he’s probably just trying to figure out why I’m here.”

“I know,” Najin whines.

“Then why are you being so hostile to him? You have to know that the circumstances surrounding my apprenticeship are odd. If all the knights accepted me blindly, I think we’d have bigger problems on our hands.”

“You haven’t been around knights long enough to know what they’re like,” Najin says petulantly. “You think Fadiyan’s bad? They’re all like that. They’ve been too strong for too long, so they’re all out of their minds. Even if he’s just testing you, he’s going to go about it in the most insane way possible.”

Nagyunn just laughs. “They have no reason to think I’m capable of anything more than I’ve shown in the evaluation matches. Even if he does test me, he'll probably have to do it within the limits of what the other apprentices can handle, so it won’t be too dangerous. Have some faith in me, Jin-ah. There are lines he won’t cross.”

…well, Najin supposes he’ll see for himself eventually. In the meantime, it’s only their first mission, so it’s not like anything too crazy can happen.

Najin reluctantly waves him off as Qilin Squad departs—

—and slams Zius against a tree, days later, with no Nagyunn in sight.

“Why,” he says, enunciating every syllable crisply, “the hell. Did Luzian just tell me that Nagyunn walked off with the enemy?”

Fidorance’s great sword is against his throat in an instant.

“Watch yourself, Najin,” he snaps. “If you can’t control your temper—”

“Leave it,” Zius says, pushing away Fidorance’s blade gently with one hand and crushing a pressure point in Najin’s hand with his other, forcing him to let go. “It’s understandably a difficult circumstance for him. I agree that it was my responsibility to look after Nagyunn, and I failed. As such, when the Fox and the Raccoon arrive, we will go retrieve him. But—Najin, I know, but no, you cannot come with us. That’s my only condition.”

“But—”

“Najin.” Zius lowers his voice so that only the two of them can hear. “I know that you’re very attached to your brother. But you can see why behavior this erratic could be a liability on missions, right? So even though you’re strong, and even if this mission weren’t too dangerous for apprentices, I can’t allow you to join us.”

Najin scowls. His reasoning is, of course, flawless. It’s like talking to Nagyunn.

Doesn’t mean he has to like it.

“Go fuck yourself,” he tells Zius childishly.

Zius just sighs. “I will not be doing that. You—just… try to get along with Fidorance. You’re the strongest here, so everyone looks up to you. Help him keep the other apprentices in line while we’re gone.”

Cool! Najin immediately adds that to the list of things he will not be doing even under threat of death.

Zius pinches the bridge of his nose, but wisely lets it drop.

Najin is… almost surprised, by how fast Zius pulls together an operation to retrieve Nagyunn. He’d been intending to go after Nagyunn himself if they didn’t head out soon, but thankfully Zius has enough sense to understand his urgency, and the knights depart as soon as they’ve gathered.

For his part, Najin can only train distractedly, all the while praying that Nagyunn hasn’t already died at a time that he’s no longer able to return to. He counts the seconds as Fidorance attempts to rally him into actually putting effort into his training. Apparently, his behavior is concerning enough behavior that the knight first tries to talk to him, then sic the Woodion apprentices on him—but joke’s on him, because Najin couldn’t care less about any of them.

In the evening, when Najin is just getting antsy enough to consider resetting the day, just to be safe, the knights finally return with Nagyunn in tow.

Najin immediately breaks away from the rest of the apprentices to tackle him with a hug. “Gyunn-ah!”

Nagyunn laughs. “Missed me, huh?”

Zius glances down at them. “…well, I guess you’ve been through enough for today. We’ll handle Liamin. Fox.”

And then they’re alone.

“Think you could let me up, Jin-ah?” Nagyunn says lightheartedly.

Najin allows it, glaring all the while. “Do you know how worried I was? You dumbass, how could you just walk off with the enemy like that? That was so dangerous—”

“But I’m fine, see?” Nagyunn pinches his cheek. “I know I’m not strong like you, but I can help the others in my own right.”

“Well, they’re all stronger than you. They can handle themselves. Or Zius can, I don’t care. But don’t do things like that again.”

“The knights told me off for that too,” Nagyunn laughs.

“And don’t you think maybe that says something?” Najin says snippily. “I told you they’re all insane, and even they thought your plan was insane.”

“I know. But it was a dangerous situation for everyone,” Nagyunn says gently. “I did what I had to.”

“Fuck the others.”

“Oh, Jin-ah, what am I going to do with you?” Nagyunn sighs, ruffling his hair affectionately.

“…Does that mean you’re going to do it again? Because we can just leave, then. They’ll figure it out themselves.”

“I guess we could,” Nagyunn says noncommittally. “But, listen, I’ve been thinking.”

…That’s not a very reassuring answer. “About?”

“That enemy… he was monstrous. Even three knights struggled against him.”

“Zius barely counts.”

“Okay, then two knights did. And he’s helping the masked group. And, Jin-ah, I don’t know what you did, and I know you don’t want to tell me—but they’re really, truly after us, I think. So it’s definitely going to be a while before we can just take off.”

“They can’t hurt us if they can’t find us,” Najin insists stubbornly.

Nagyunn smiles wryly. “I know. But you’re… a genius, Najin. You’re going to stand out no matter where you go. You know that.”

“I mean, yeah, but—” A sudden thought strikes him. “…hey, how do you even know about the masked group?”

“Oh.” Nagyunn winces. “Well… okay, so please don’t be mad, but…”

“But?”

“…I told Qilin-nim some… things… after we found out about the wizards, because I suspected that one of the Woodion apprentices had been spying on you. And we ferreted out Ruth, and he had a mask that communicated with others, and, y’know, we put two and two together. That’s how I managed to convince the skeleton to leave the others alone, actually. ‘Cuz I was holding on to the mask.”

Najin blinks slowly. “You… told Zius.”

“Yeah,” Nagyunn says awkwardly. “Sorry for not consulting you, but it seemed too dangerous to stay quiet when people were dying…”

Najin squints. “You trust that guy?”

“I mean… no? Not really? But he’s smart. He can be useful, at least.”

Najin lets out a breath of relief. At least Nagyunn isn’t being completely naïve about this.

“Good enough I guess,” he says. “I guess if you don’t feel safe leaving, we can stay until things resolve themselves. Do you think he’s still suspicious of you?”

“Oh, for sure,” Nagyunn says brightly.

“How much did you tell him?”

“Only that we’d had a run-in with the masked group, and they seemed to be targeting you, for whatever reason,” Nagyunn says. “You know. Parts of the truth. He’ll probably ask you some questions too, later, but I don’t think he’s going to lay it on too thick for now.”

Najin sighs. “Okay.”

“If that’s settled, should we go rejoin the others?”

“Sure,” Najin says. “But…”

He finally notices the strangely shaped dagger beside Nagyunn.

“…what is that?”

Nagyunn beams. “I stole it.”

Najin groans, rubbing at his temples. “Gyunn-ah, seriously? Please don’t ever do something like this again.”

Nagyunn stares at him for just a fraction of a second too long with a strange half-smile on his face.

“Alright,” he says. “Promise.”

Liar.

But Najin knows he’d be the world’s biggest hypocrite if he said anything about it, so he doesn’t.

Time passes with the knights. They encounter the Dragon’s Descendants again, but do not manage to fully defeat them, so they stay with the knights and continue training.

The standout apprentices—him, Marsha, Wadrin, Pymel, Tyr, and Luzian—split their time between the capital and special training with Zius and Darang. It means he sees Nagyunn less, but when they do meet his brother still seems to be in good enough spirits, so he doesn’t push for them to leave again.

In the meantime:

Najin improves at an impressive rate, of course. It earns him a lot of attention and popularity among the apprentices, which he mostly brushes off with rude indifference. And Nagyunn grows his strength quietly, away from the limelight, in ways that the apprentices do not take note of but the knights do.

It still comes as a bit of a surprise when brawn-for-brains Fidorance selects Nagyunn to take part in the advanced missions. Najin can’t say he likes the idea of Nagyunn being put in danger like that, but it does mean he can at least continue to keep an eye on him, and Nagyunn seems pleased, so he can’t really bring himself to ruin his mood. They leave the capital along with the other selected apprentices around noon, a bounce in Nagyunn’s step the whole way.

In the afternoon, they receive their mission briefing and some news about runaway apprentices. Pure foolishness, not that Najin really cares except for the fact that it will make more work for him.

They send out search parties in the early morning, Najin with Tyr and Marsha, Nagyunn with Luzian and Wadrin.

He and Nagyunn locate the runaways at about the same time—

—which means neither of them could possibly be fast enough to save Jiroon, who is left to collapse from the dagger wound in her side.

Nagyunn reaches her first. “Jiroon!”’

Najin is sprinting after him, circuit in hand, when the world goes dark.

He opens his eyes to a hazy, half-formed being made of white wisps—

And is more confused than ever.

It’s not that he doesn’t know where he is, although he’d been hoping he’d never have to see this place again, had almost managed to forget the darker-than-dark inkiness of the space between death and waking. But he has no idea how he got here. He’d thought…

“How did I die?” he asks the being, bewildered.

“You did not,” it replies from its nonexistent mouth. “She did.”

Najin stares. “Then why am I here?”

“Because she was not meant to die.”

“But what does that have to do with…”

A horrible thought dawns on him.

“I see you already understand,” the being says. “He lived because of your interference, so the deaths his life incurs will be your burden to bear, Child of Fire.”

“…and the day will keep repeating until I do save her?”

“You do have another option,” it says.

Najin glares. “Fuck off.”

Najin wakes.

It’s early morning. He squints against the sunlight—

Filtering through a window, not tree leaves.

Najin bolts upright. Everyone is asleep except for Toorisun. Yesterday—the time before Jiroon died and he woke—he’d woken up in the forest, where Zius had asked them to gather. But he’s in the capital, so that would’ve been… two days ago?

It’s different from last time. Then…

Najin thinks it over for a moment, gives up, and sighs. Then nothing. There’s too many factors that have changed. Shame that he’s not nearly as good at this kind of thing as Nagyunn, but Najin’s not about to bother him over something this trivial.

He’ll figure out a way to take care of this on his own.

The apprentices gather in the tavern for breakfast. It’s honestly pretty convenient that he’s been brought back to now; all he has to do is approach Jiroon and convince her not to go with the runaways, before heading out with the others who have been selected for missions.

He’s mostly done with his breakfast by the time she finally comes downstairs with Quaring. He tunes out Nagyunn and Lauzun’s conversation, momentarily, to catch her saying—

“—yeah, I just had a really bad nightmare. I’m fine. But thank you for waking me, I wouldn’t want to be late…”

…a nightmare. Had she originally said something like this? Najin doesn’t pay enough attention to her normally to remember.

But he does remember mistaking his first loop for a dream. An interesting possibility.

Najin weighs his options quickly. Even if he approached her now, she’d probably still have trouble believing him; in that case, waiting is probably the better option. In the worst case, it’s just a fluke, and he’ll have to start again—but after the fiasco with Nagyunn, he’s pretty numb to this kind of repetition. In the best case, letting things play out again would save him a lot of trouble.

Mind made up, he finishes breakfast and waits for Nagyunn to head over to the training grounds. He dutifully ignores Marsha’s attempts to make conversation throughout the day, and finally, in the afternoon, after selection, he heads out to the forest with everyone else.

In the morning, they form search parties and look for the three runaways. He makes a beeline for their location immediately, but Jiroon must have misstepped somewhere, because he arrives only in time to see her body fall.

In between one blink and the next, Najin opens his eyes to find himself surrounded by the abyss once more. The being observes him silently this time, offering no commentary.

Najin wakes.

As expected, he’s back in the capital once more; Toorisun is gone, but the others are all asleep. Najin glances over at Jiroon’s sleeping form, thinks about how odd it would be if anyone woke up while he was trying to wake her, and heads downstairs for breakfast instead.

The others trickle downstairs slowly, woken by the morning light or their friends as they begin preparing for the day. Najin sits at the table closest to the stairs and nibbles on his bread, Wadrin and Darigon talking up a storm even though he keeps pointedly ignoring them, wishing desperately that he’d had the foresight to wake Nagyunn as well so the others would fuck off.

Finally, Jiroon comes down the stairs, unaccompanied by Quaring this time. Looks like his guess was right.

As she passes him, Najin grabs her wrist.

“Wait,” he says. “Let’s talk.”

“I think this is the first time we’ve had a conversation on our own,” Jiroon remarks with a small smile as he leads her into the alley just outside the inn. Probably a friendly attempt to break the silence. “You always keep to yourself and Nagyunn. Is there something I can help you with?”

“No,” Najin says.

“Then—”

“You’re the one who needs help.”

Her smile falters. “…Pardon?”

“I’m sure you’ve noticed by now,” he says, “but the day repeats if you die.”

 “H-how…”

“So you should stop dying.”

She stares at him wordlessly for a moment, mouth gaping. Finally, she says, “I—I’m sorry? I didn’t… how did you…”

For a moment, Najin considers explaining things to her, but then immediately dismisses his brief bout of insanity. More trouble than it’s worth. Besides, there’s no guarantee that she’d treat Nagyunn the same after. He couldn’t care less about her, but he can tell that Nagyunn likes her work ethic and sincerity, and he’d hate to ruin that.

So instead, Najin says, “I’d have to be stupid not to notice after the second time, wouldn’t I?”

Maybe it’s the wrong thing to say. Najin knows he’s not exactly delicate about things, but Jiroon turns sheet white at that, nails digging into her skin from how tightly she’s clasped her hands together.

“…you’re not going to faint, right.”

Jiroon doesn’t seem to hear him. “Then does that mean the others…?”

“No,” he says, then quickly adds, “—well, I don’t think so.”

She visibly relaxes. “Oh. Okay, that’s…” She tucks a stray hair behind her ear, laughing awkwardly. “Well, I can’t say dying is pleasant, but at least it won’t… traumatize the others too much…”

Ugh. She sounds exactly like Nagyunn.

“So how come we remember then?” she asks.

He shrugs. “How would I know?”

Jiroon laughs apologetically, seemingly unbothered by his rudeness. “Yeah, I guess that was silly of me. I think… um, that was you last time, right? The person who found us first?”

“Yeah.”

“Thank you for that,” she smiles. “And… I’m sorry to ask you for another favor after that—and I definitely don’t mean to be presumptuous—but do you think… could you tell me where the Qilin and the rest are staying?”

Najin stares at her uncomprehendingly. “You’re still planning to go with Toorisun and Yulnia?”

She laughs softly. “Well… if I back out, they’ll just go without me and get killed. It doesn’t really solve anything, you know?”

“And you think repeating the same actions will? Didn’t you already try that last time?”

“Well… there’s still a lot of things that could change. Maybe if we can avoid those two and stay on track to find your base…”

“That’s exactly how you’ll get yourself killed again,” Najin tells her bluntly.

“I guess it isn’t a very solid plan,” Jiroon agrees amiably. “This kind of thing isn’t really my specialty… but, hm… Nagyunn’s really good at coming up with plans. Maybe we could ask him for—”

Najin slams his fist against the wall. Jiroon flinches.

“Absolutely not,” he says, voice dead calm as he stares her down. “Leave Nagyunn out of this.”

She must be more tenacious than she looks, because she doesn’t back down. “But I’m sure, coming from you at least, if we explain—”

“What part of ‘no’ do you not understand?” Najin snaps.

He thought that’d be a clear enough warning that she’d change the topic, but instead a strange look passes over her face.

“You…” Jiroon says slowly, “are being very… does he already know? Or…”

Ice cold dread seeps down his spine. Najin clenches his fists.

“…perhaps he’s been in the same—”

“You’d better stop talking,” Najin says quietly.

His demeanor is definitely starting to affect her now. She takes a nervous step back, shoulders hunched with hesitancy—

But her eyes remain determined. “Then… at least tell me why you’re so agai—”

Najin bares his teeth. She’s really going to insist on this, huh?

“What,” he says, enunciating every syllable sharply, “makes you deserving of his help in the first place? He’s the weakest apprentice, but you’ll all just flock to him for help whenever it suits you, huh? Can’t you do anything by yourself?”

He takes one step forward. She takes one step back.

“You’ve had two chances already, and all you—”

“Jin-ah?”

Najin freezes, then quickly plasters and eases the hostility from his body language. “Oh, Nagyunn, wh—”

“What’re you doing over here? I’ve been looking for you all morning.” Nagyunn nods at Jiroon—“Good morning, Jiroon.”

Najin opens his mouth. “We were just—”

“I asked Najin for some training tips, since I haven’t been improving very quickly,” Jiroon says.

“I see. I’m glad you’ve finally started helping the other apprentices, Jin-ah,” Nagyunn grins, “because I thought for sure I heard you two talking about time loops—”

Both Najin and Jiroon stiffen.

“—but you wouldn’t keep something like that from me again,” Nagyunn finishes in the same cheerful tone. “Right. Jin-ah.”

“R-right…” Jiroon laughs nervously, as Najin becomes very enamored with the wall beside him.

“Najin.”

“I was planning to tell you later,” he says petulantly.

He can tell Nagyunn doesn’t believe him for a second, but he smiles and lets it slide. “I see. Can you catch me up then?”

He can feel the weight of Jiroon’s gaze on him as he says, “Of course. Tomorrow, Jiroon’s going to die. After selection, Toorisun, Yulnia, and her are going to go off on their own, and they’ll meet a group that ends up killing her. Then the day repeats.”

“Tomorrow?” Nagyunn repeats.

“Yeah.”

“That’s different,” he muses. “It’s probably significant. I would assume today’s the last time you can make any real change, but it doesn’t hurt to evaluate our options. Jiroon, could you tell me anything with more detail?”

She glances at Najin, and finding no sign of fight in him, looks back at Nagyunn and gives him a more detailed recount of her day. She describes the two suspicious mercenaries and how they approach their group, and in the morning, when she ensnares them, the way they attack her.

“I see,” Nagyunn says. “Well, I’m sure you’ve thought of this already, but I think you shouldn’t go with Toorisun and Yulnia to begin with.”

“She says they’d still go without her, so she wants to accompany them,” Najin says.

“They’re a bit… you know, reckless,” Jiroon says. “So I think…”

“Yeah,” Nagyunn says, “they’d definitely be in danger too. Then should we tell a knight? I’m sure the Fox or the Wild Dog could stop them.”

“I mean, that would stop them now,” Jiroon says, “but…”

“You think it’s delaying the inevitable?”

“Yes. And since we’re stuck in a time loop anyway, I thought it might be better to get it out of their system while we have some knowledge of what we’ll encounter.”

On the one hand, Najin is annoyed by how insistent she is on following the same doomed path. On the other, if they change things too drastically and Toorisun or Yulnia dies and joins the time loop, he thinks he’ll stab someone. Possibly himself.

“But I came immediately last time,” he says, “and I still didn’t make it in time. Do you think you’ll be able to change things enough on your own to keep all three of you safe?”

Jiroon twists a strand of hair anxiously. “I… I don’t know. We’re a bit… outclassed… in terms of combat power, so I think it’d be hard…”

“Then how are we supposed to stop this cycle?”

Jiroon seems to shrink in on herself. “I just thought…”

Nagyunn takes pity on her. “It’s fine. There are other things we could try to change. I could probably convince the Qilin to send the search party out tonight instead of tomorrow morning—”

Ah, that’s right. He’d forgotten that the knight has a soft spot for Nagyunn.

“—so you should just focus on staying awake without arousing suspicion.”

“I’ll try, but I still haven’t figured out how they’re drugging us. I haven’t let the others accept anything from them so far.”

“They’re probably slipping something into your water,” Najin says.

“Yes, but I was watching them much more closely last time…”

“Well, to be safe, you should probably avoid drinking anything tonight,” Nagyunn says. “Yulnia probably won’t listen, but if you can, try to convince Toorisun to do the same. Say that Najin uses it as a training regiment or something, I don’t know. It’ll just be for one evening.”

“I see… that’s probably for the best,” Jiroon sighs. “I’ll give it a shot. Thank you for all the help, Nagyunn.”

“Don’t mention it.” He turns back to Najin. “Let’s go to the training grounds?”

“Sure,” Najin says.

“Are you coming, Jiroon?”

“I’ll head over with Quaring,” she replies. “I’ll see you two in a bit.”

Najin shrugs and falls into step with Nagyunn. The walk is awkwardly silent.

When they’ve almost arrived, he clears his throat and says, “So, um.”

Nagyunn side-eyes him.

“…Sorry,” he mumbles.

Nagyunn sighs. “Najin, I just… I don’t know. Am I so undependable?”

“No!” he shouts. He flushes and lowers his voice. “No, not at all, but… I don’t know, I just didn’t think you needed to be involved. Since you didn’t seem to remember anything.”

“I mean, yeah… but—” He sighs again. “Well, I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that you’ve been trying to become more independent. I just… I don’t know. I wish you wouldn’t keep me out of the loop.”

“I’m sorry. I’ll tell you next time for sure, alright?”

Nagyunn searches his eyes to confirm that he’s telling the truth. Najin offers a small smile.

(He’s been keeping secrets from his brother for years now; it isn’t nearly so easy for Nagyunn to read him anymore.)

His lie passes muster.

“Alright,” Nagyunn says. “Thank you.”

Najin relaxes a bit.

“But, also…”

All the tension immediately floods back in.

“And, um, you don’t have to answer this if you’re not comfortable with it,” Nagyunn says, which of course only serves to make Najin even more uneasy, “but… in that first time loop. Are you sure the loop reset if either of us died?”

Najin smiles nervously. “Where’d this come from?”

“Jiroon seems to remember dying,” Nagyunn says. “I don’t.”

What… is he supposed to say to that? If I didn’t die first then I kept killing myself until I could save you. Oh, and by the way, Jiroon’s only dying now because of that.

“Well, a lot of things have changed this time around,” Najin says calmly. “I guess I don’t really know either.”

Nagyunn stares at him for a long time. He can sense Najin’s uneasiness, he thinks, so Nagyunn probably knows he’s lying. But he thinks the truth would hurt him much more than this, and he’s been through enough as is.

Yes, Najin has failed to protect Nagyunn in most of the ways that matter. But he can at least protect him from this.

“…alright, Jin-ah,” Nagyunn says at length. “But you know you can tell me anything, right? I’ll always be there for you.”

“I know,” he says simply. “We… let’s go in. We’re going to be late.”

Mercifully, Nagyunn lets it drop.

In the evening, once Darang has brought news of the runaways, Nagyunn pulls Zius aside and persuades him to send out search parties tonight. In another life, if Nagyunn had had the interest for it, Najin thinks he probably could’ve done well in the knights with sheer charisma and brainpower alone.

As soon as they’re in the forest, Najin splits from the others and makes a beeline for Jiroon’s group. Jiroon must have succeeded in convincing Toorisun, because they’re both awake when he arrives. They both leap to their feet when they finally notice Najin’s approach.

“N-Najin—I’m not going back until I meet with the Qilin!” Toorisun shouts immediately.

Najin groans. This idiot.

Jiroon’s would-be murderers take notice of the commotion and also approach. “What’s—”

The purple-haired girl tenses at the sight of Najin. “You…”

“Oh,” Najin says. People who recognize him and react hostilely, but who he does not recognize. There’s only really one possibility, isn’t there? “Dragon’s Descendants.”

He can see the gears turning in their head.

“What?” Toorisun exclaims. “I—”

Stupidly, they choose to fight.

By the time Fidorance arrives, the Dragon’s Descendants have long fled. Najin has half a mind to follow them and kill them, to prevent any future mishaps between their schemes and Nagyunn, but forces himself to stay behind. Nagyunn said he wanted to stay with the knights and see where it could take them; he’s not going to ruin that with un-knightly behavior.

They return to camp in dour silence. Just before the runaways are led off by Zius—probably for an earful—Jiroon turns back to him and mouths, thank you.

Najin suppresses an eyeroll.

Whatever. It’s fixed then, right? He’s glad to be free of this business again.

Jiroon seeks him out the following afternoon, after Zius has given out the mission briefings again.

“There you are,” she says. “I was hoping I could catch you before you left.”

Najin doesn’t look back, continuing to practice his strike acuity. He only just got Wadrin to leave him alone, and now this? “What do you want?”

“Well… first of all, thank you again, for yesterday.”

“You already told me that.”

Jiroon laughs, undeterred. “I guess I did. You guys are all leaving tomorrow, right?”

Najin switches to a backhand strike. “Yeah.”

“I see. Um… so I don’t mean to pry, but—”

“I can’t tell you where we’re going, if that’s what you’re going to ask.”

“No,” Jiroon says. “it’s not that. I told you already, I only wanted to make sure Toorisun and Yulnia didn’t do anything impulsive. This is about Nagyunn.”

That gets his attention.

Najin straightens up out of his battle stance, turning as he does, but he does not sheath his sword.

“What about my brother?” he asks calmly.

He can tell Jiroon chooses her next words carefully. “So… he’s experienced these time loops before too, right?”

Najin considers that. There’s not really a point to lying about that anymore. “They were different from what you went through. But sort of.”

“He died then, right?”

Najin’s grip on his sword tightens. “Do you actually have a point with all this, or are you just going to keep wasting my time?”

Jiroon sighs. “Najin… I’m not trying to antagonize you. I just… don’t really understand why you were so insistent on leaving him out of this. I had assumed you two were close.”

“We are.”

“Then…?”

“I mean, wasting my time was enough, don’t you think?” Najin says carelessly. “Why are you so insistent on getting Nagyunn involved?”

“But it wasn’t a waste of time,” Jiroon says. “He resolved the situation so easily. Would you have been able to convince the Qilin?”

“I don’t know, would you have been able to defeat those two?” Najin scowls. “You realize that this whole situation arose because you lack the strength to carry out your convictions. You talk about wanting to be a knight, but you knew the future and you still managed to get yourself killed. Where do you get your confidence from?”

Jiroon flinches. “I—that…”

“Cat got your tongue?” he mocks. “Now you finally have nothing to say? Good. If you don’t have the talent for it, then maybe you should just focus on yourself. Stop poking your nose into other people’s business until you have the strength to back it up.”

“But if I hadn’t joined those two, they would’ve blindly—”

“What, let slip some information about the knights?” Najin laughs. “Please. They barely know anything, they’re ranked so low. Even if they had accidentally led them here, Zius and Darang would’ve taken care of them. So what did you prevent, hm? What do you contribute to the apprentices at all? Did you even manage to stop Yulnia from eating anything weird?”

Jiroon is almost shivering now, eyes unfocused. “I…”

Najin goes for the killing blow.

“You’ve been thinking it too, haven’t you?” he murmurs, leaning in close to her. “That we’d all be better off without you.”

He’s so close that he can feel her trembling.

Then, without warning, she shoves him.

“Get away from me. S-so what if I sometimes need help?” she snaps, cheeks flushed, eyes shining with tears. “We were never meant to work alone anyway. E-even the Qilin gets help from others.”

“That’s what weaklings say,” Najin says. “It seems to me that you’re just making excuses for the fact that you don’t have the strength or the conviction to do anything on your own.”

“Yeah, it would seem that way to you,” Jiroon says, “because you’re afraid to ask for help.”

Najin narrows his eyes. “What does that mean.”

“It means you only ever get this nasty when I start talking about Nagyunn!” Jiroon yells. “I don’t know what happened between you two—probably the time loops—I guess you had to watch him die a few times—”

There’s static in his ears. “Shut up.”

“—and—and…” Understanding dawns on her face. “…and you think it’s your fault.”

“You talk a lot for someone who can’t even save herself,” Najin says loudly.

A hard set appears in her eyes. “Look, there you go again. But all this was never about me. You’re overcompensating now, trying to protect Nagyunn from everything—"

“Shut up!”

“—but you’re not any more capable of doing everything alone than I am!” Jiroon yells over him. “So stop shutting people out!”

“What the fuck does it matter to you?” he shouts back. “Leave me alone!”

“Because you’re hurting your brother!” she snaps. “Did you not see his face yesterday? You think he doesn’t know you’re hiding things from him? Do you really think you’re doing him a favor by keeping all these secrets?”

“What would you even know about Nagyunn?” Najin sneers. “Why do you even care?”

“I’m his friend!” she yells. “Which maybe you’d know if you ever pulled your head out of your ass long enough to look around! For the record, he’s the one who’s been encouraging me to keep trying—that’s where I get my confidence from, since you were asking oh-so-kindly earlier!”

Najin blinks, momentarily startled out of his anger. “He—”

“Yes—he has friends unlike someone, because he’s not busy obsessing over his brother and all the things he’s hiding from him,” Jiroon continues hotly. “You know what, maybe I was wrong. Maybe you’re not afraid to ask people for help, you just have no one you can ask for help. You won’t let any of the apprentices get close to you, and you’ve shut your own brother out—”

“I have not.”

“—so maybe you’re right! Maybe I can’t ever be a knight. But at least I can be a human being.”

“I’d ask Nagyunn for help if I needed it,” Najin snaps. “It’s just not necessary. And I don’t care about any of the others, they’re worthless to me.”

She stares him directly in the eye.

“How many times, then?” she asks quietly.

“What?”

“You heard me. How many times did Nagyunn die before you finally asked him for help?”

Najin stares.

“He’s the most important thing in the world to you, isn’t he?” Jiroon says. “But you couldn’t even ask him for help with that? Even though you saw how easily he resolved the problem with me?”

“That doesn’t—it’s not like it really makes a difference—I…”

Jiroon crosses her arms and waits, but no other answer is forthcoming.

Finally, she sighs.

“You know, Najin,” she says, “to be really honest you’ve been kind of a dick to me and everyone else, and I don’t actually care if you ever figure this shit out or not. But I do generally like Nagyunn, and the way you’re acting is not only hurting him personally, it’s also going to drive off anyone else who could ever care about him. So—if nothing else, for his sake, can’t you be a bit more honest with him? I promise you, things get easier when you don’t carry them alone.”

Najin tries valiantly to sort out his jumbled thoughts, to no avail. The only thing he can come up with is:

“…fuck off.”

Jiroon sighs defeatedly, turns, and stalks off without another word.

The five of them leave for the eastern continent after that: him, Nagyunn, Marsha, Pymel, and Zius.

Despite all their preparation, they’re caught almost immediately after disembarking. Nagyunn is led away by the general on his own, and then it’s just the four of them, tense and on edge but forced to pretend they’re still just ordinary smugglers.

Nagyunn is back in less than half an hour, but to Najin it feels like ages, the sinking sun marking time conspicuously across the reddening sky.

“I think it’ll be safe for us to split up,” Nagyunn says.

“Then—”

“No, Najin,” Zius says. “You and Marsha are coming with me. Pymel will stay behind.”

“But Nagyunn has almost no combat power. If something goes wrong—”

(Najin loses the ensuing argument. Badly.)

In the morning, Nagyunn goes to meet the general again. Pymel stays behind, and the rest of them are dispatched to the outskirts of town, where they meet a man who calls himself a dragon.

At first, Najin is disinterested. The strange man really only seems interested in Zius, who is also content to do all the talking, so Najin simply tunes them out. Until—

“Child of Fire.”

He starts.

The strange man grins, lizard-like eyes narrowing into ominous slits. “Oh, so you were already aware. Then you must also know about the imbalances you have brought into the world. The one you have saved… his existence is a bit troublesome for me.”

…Never mind. It doesn’t matter what he knows.

If he’s going to threaten Nagyunn, Najin will just kill him.

Zius jerks Najin back before he can fully unsheathe his sword, eyes glowing gold as he glares at Najin and shakes his head.

Najin ignores him. “I’ll kill you.”

“You cannot,” the strange man says.

“Then I’ll kill myself,” Najin says, ignoring Zius’s alarmed stare and Marsha’s startled confusion, “so don’t even think about it.”

The man sighs. “How bothersome…”

And the world goes black.

The being is waiting for Najin.

Najin is waiting for it too, sword of haze and dreams already in hand.

“Are you with that man?” he demands.

“He has already told you what he is,” the being says, unperturbed.

…so, a dragon. Well, why not. He’s been repeating time to save Nagyunn, and now to save the ones that have died in his stead. There might as well be dragons. Sure.

“You have accepted it,” the being says. “Good.”

Najin sighs. “Who, then?”

“That’s for you to find out,” it tells him blandly. “Or, of course, if you are tired of righting the things that have gone wrong, you could always try to set your world back on its original course.”

“Don’t suggest that ever again.”

“The dragon was right, you know,” the being continues, as if it did not hear him. “These imbalances will continue to form. Do you truly have enough conviction to clean up these messes for the rest of your life, Child of Fire?”

“Yes,” Najin says. “If that’s what it will take.”

“A heavy burden to bear alone. But how very human of you,” god says. “Well, in any case, I suppose a little hint wouldn’t hurt. His name is Naryun—though you may know him better as the Broken Spear.”

…what the fuck.

“So I have to defect?” he asks, but god does not answer.

The between space dissolves, abyssal black replaced by normal darkness once more.

Najin wakes.

He sits up. He’s in the inn they were told to stay in again. Nagyunn and Zius are gone, but they’ll be back in soon to wake the others and head out.

Lovely. He’s not even on the same continent as the Broken Spear right now. He has no idea what killed him or how he’s supposed to fix that. And even if he was back on the central continent, it’s not as if he can work with the guy, not after what Nagyunn pulled. So how…

Unbidden, an annoying memory surfaces:

I promise you, things get easier when you don’t carry them alone.

…like he needed her to tell him something like that.

If nothing else, for his sake, can’t you be a bit more honest with him?

He grits his teeth. Is he really going to let someone like that get under his skin?

You just have no one you can ask for help, Jiroon taunts.

Najin buries his head in his hands and groans. Fine! Fine, he’ll go to Nagyunn for help. He is definitely not doing this to prove Jiroon wrong or anything.

He forces himself up and checks the neighboring room. As expected, he can distantly make out Nagyunn and Zius’s voices.

He pushes the door open a crack.

“Jin-ah!” Nagyunn perks up immediately when he notices him. “Good morning. Did you sleep well?”

“Fine,” Najin rasps, voice still creaky with sleep. “Can you come back to our room for a moment?”

“Sure,” Nagyunn agrees, and follows him out.

Once the door is shut behind him, Nagyunn turns toward him expectantly.

Najin hesitates. He hadn’t thought this far ahead. How much should he tell him? Definitely not about the actual cause of these time loops, but maybe a bit about the being he keeps meeting wouldn’t hurt… that would at least explain how he knows about Naryun.

Okay, that should work. He gives Nagyunn a quick rundown of the situation.

“That’s a bit…” Nagyunn brings a hand over his mouth, gaze calculating as the gears start to turn. “Okay, I think… it’ll be tricky, but I can try to convince the Qilin to contact the others and tell them not to get in contact with the skeleton. And you—try to convince the dragon, when you meet him, to help you out. Or at least figure out what he wants. Even if this fails, any information you get from him will help us next time, alright?”

Najin lets out a breath. It really was that easy, for Nagyunn, to see a way out.

…and his shoulders really do feel lighter. Fuck. He hates that Jiroon was right about that too.

“Okay,” Najin says. “Let’s go with that.”

“Alright.” Nagyunn gets up again. “Then I’ll go talk with Qilin-nim before he heads out.”

“Let me know how it goes,” he says.

“I will,” Nagyunn says. He pauses at the door. “Oh, and Najin?”

“Hm?”

“…thank you for letting me help,” he says, and then he steps out, letting the door swing shut behind him.

Alone in the room once more, Najin collapses backwards onto his bed, covering his face with a heavy sigh.

What had that being said—a heavy burden to bear alone? It must’ve been echoing Najin’s thoughts back at him, hoping to dig up some insecurities and persuade Najin to return the world to its original path.

But why did it take him so long to realize?

He was never alone to begin with.

thinking about a Najin time loop au BUT other people are sent back (time loop requirement ambiguous) but only after Najin's successfully survived the day. hell on fucking earth for everyone involved.

Najin's been looping while trying to keep him AND Nagyunn alive for an uncountable number of times and is just getting angrier each time. it takes him way too long to ask Nagyunn for help with this because he's supposed to be protecting him, damn it, and he's just spent so many years hiding everything from him that it just doesn't occur to ask him for help. he keeps trying to attack the author-god thing from Gilgamesh in the space between dying and waking.

oh, just thought of Najin getting trapped in other people's time loops and being forced to help them. he'd be soooo fucking mad. he just got out of hell and now he's stuck in it with someone he probably doesn't even like. what if it's an every time someone dies (in the canon timeline) thing. first Jiroon (counting the day she's stabbed as the death day because she's comatose after which is not as fun and mostly out of people's hands) who is very confused, because she has memories of both timelines now, and the Najin in front of her and the Najin she remembers are very different people, and that scenario is discounting the very real possibility that Najin just dipped with Nagyunn before the dragon's descendants could kill them.

and regardless of how they meet, she also has emotional intelligence and is willing to use it on him, which means his mountain of shit that he refuses to touch is very much about to be poked by the closest thing he's ever had to a therapist, so, of course, he's going to poke at her insecurities much more maliciously than she ever did him. her insecurities about being a knight and how it's gotten her killed in two separate timelines come up so he says she never should have tried and it hurts so bad but she agrees with him. but, well, she's handling this whole situation much better than he ever has, and over the course of it she starts to build up her confidence and she stops just taking it when he's an ass to her and starts giving what she gets and they start kinda getting along, and eventually, he admits that she's probably the most knightly person he's ever met and that she's more than proved herself throughout all this. and she says that he's not so bad himself, and what do you know, that's the loop they finally both survive.

and then days after this he gets stuck with Naryun.

[biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer]

Can you please write some (optional relationship, if not, romanse) headcannons for Geo and/or Hyugo with a weeb MC? They don't have to be strictly into anime, but just really loving Japanese and Japanese culture (bonus if they don't know Japanese).

Chronic Love (Geo + Hyugo x Weeb! MC/Reader)

Enjoy my amazing little weeb, have an awesome day! Solemnly thanks for entrusting me with writing this for you.

Also, uh, a minor sidenote, I am not an anime enjoyer or even remotely close to a weeb; so if I get something wrong/too exaggerated etc. feel free to publicly execute me in the town square. <333

You can read this from any perspective, as in, both in an established relationship setting and a solely platonic one. :]

A/N: From now on, Geo and Hyugo will be referred to as Geode and Hyugeode, if anyone in the Geo religion utters 'Geo', they shall atone. 😊😊😊/hj

- Signed by biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer

Chronic(ally): to a very great extent; extremely.

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Hyugo is honestly surprised when he finds out of your...intense love for Japan and its culture.

He won't be opposed to it, he'd find it a smidge endearing, considering he's Japanese; and you seem to be willing to learn anything about it. He's more than happy to tell you what you wanna know.

Do you take advantage of this? Yes.

Would probably eventually, to your joy, start telling you cultural appropriations and norms, along with a couple generic Japanese words/phrases (you say them whenever possible, feeling the language fall from your lips and off your tongue feels so right, you can't get enough!).

You ask him to tutor you Japanese at some point, to which he politely declines (he's got enough on his plate okay?!), but is willing to converse with you if you ask.

Just don't nag him, he fucking hates being nagged.

You'd probably mispronounce certain words, to which he'd correct you, until you get the hang of it.

Might take you to a Japanese candy store to tell you his personal recommendations (they're great btw).

If you like anime he'll be chill with it, just don't act like the stereotypical weeb and he's fine.

Learning words is one thing, overdramatizing, glorifying and exaggerating Japanese things annoys him.

Fortunately, you're reasonably calm with your devotion for it, and he doesn't mind.

Would get a bit nervous if you decide to actively pursue Japanese, after all, what if you overhear him talking to one of his shadier acquaintances and pick out the context?

Would overtime subtly monitor you, gauge how much you know and how quickly you're progressing.

Overall supportive though, enjoys the fact you like Japan. :]

Literally doesn't care. At all.

You like Japan? Cool. Good for you.

Much prefers for you to not harass him about Japanese words and phrases, unless he tolerates likes you enough, to which he'll blurt out something along the lines of: "Go fuck yourself".

Will probably teach you insults (he says it's to insult you, but we all know the real reason teehee)

If you're hanging out somewhere and Geo spies Japanese text, he might point it out to see if you know it, to which you'll be racking your brain until he relents and tell you.

Eventually will start briefly telling you things about Japans' history and art. Especially bonsais, he loves those. He'll never tell you though.

Will probably take you to a Japanese market/restaraunt eventually, if he feels you've gotten good enough.

If you order fluently enough he'll be genuinely pleased (won't show it though).

If not, he'll do it for you (internally cringes at the sheer thought aaaaaa).

However, in the rare event that Hyugo calls him "Subaru" and you hear? And understand?

That won't be good.

He'll tell you to drop it instantly.

And he will give you the most murderous glare if you ever ask him why he goes by Geo.

If he feels you've forgotten about that incident you haven't, he'll be more relaxed again, but will maintain a veil of caution now.

After all, you can understand what he says in private now.

That's not a good thing.

If you like anime he's chill with it, just don't be over-the-top obsessive towards it and he's cool.

Is satisfied you want to learn Japanese though. Likes you a lot smidge more for it too.