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agentrouka-blog · 4 years ago

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Tyrion and Tysha murder mystery hints - first mention in the text

This thing just keeps tugging at me, and this recent thread made me ambitious to examine it in more detail. So I’ll look at hints for an even darker edge to the story of Tyrion and Tysha in the parts of the text that actually mention her.

Since I have limited time, I’ll do several posts. This one is about how we learn about Tysha in A Game of Thrones.

We head into AGOT, Tyrion VI via a chapter transition from AGOT, Jon V, where Jon talks Maester Aemon into choosing Samwell as his assistant. In the presence of his current assistant Chett, who - it is revealed later in the ASOS Prologue - murdered a girl he liked for rejecting him.

Chett gave a nasty laugh. “I’ve seen what happens to soft lordlings when they’re put to work. Set them to churning butter and their hands blister and bleed. Give them an axe to split logs, and they cut off their own foot.”

“I know one thing Sam could do better than anyone.”

“Yes?” Maester Aemon prompted.

Jon glanced warily at Chett, standing beside the door, his boils red and angry. “He could help you,” he said quickly. “He can do sums, and he knows how to read and write. I know Chett can’t read, and Clydas has weak eyes. Sam read every book in his father’s library. He’d be good with the ravens too. Animals seem to like him. Ghost took to him straight off. There’s a lot he could do, besides fighting. The Night’s Watch needs every man. Why kill one, to no end? Make use of him instead.”

Maester Aemon closed his eyes, and for a brief moment Jon was afraid that he had gone to sleep. Finally he said, “Maester Luwin taught you well, Jon Snow. Your mind is as deft as your blade, it would seem.”

“Does that mean …?”

“It means I shall think on what you have said,” the maester told him firmly. “And now, I believe I am ready to sleep. Chett, show our young brother to the door.”

(AGOT, Jon V)

The chapter is followed by AGOT, Tyrion VI, where Tyrion and Bronn rest on the high road after being kicked out of the Gates of the Moon, after he won his trial by combat:

They had taken shelter beneath a copse of aspens just off the high road. Tyrion was gathering dead-wood while their horses took water from a mountain stream. He stooped to pick up a splintered branch and examined it critically. “Will this do? I am not practiced at starting fires. Morrec did that for me.”

The entire conversation between Jon, Aemon and Chett sets up Tyrion. A lordling, bad with manual labor, but smart and a reader. Yet we know he is no Samwell Tarly in his sensibilities, and the last sentence is dedicated to Chett.

Chett...

The only women Chett had ever known were the whores he’d bought in Mole’s Town. When he’d been younger, the village girls took one look at his face, with its boils and its wen, and turned away sickened. The worst was that slattern Bessa. She’d spread her legs for every boy in Hag’s Mire so he’d figured why not him too? He even spent a morning picking wildflowers when he heard she liked them, but she’d just laughed in his face and told him she’d crawl in a bed with his father’s leeches before she’d crawl in one with him. She stopped laughing when he put his knife in her. That was sweet, the look on her face, so he pulled the knife out and put it in her again. When they caught him down near Sevenstreams, old Lord Walder Frey hadn’t even bothered to come himself to do the judging. He’d sent one of his bastards, that Walder Rivers, and the next thing Chett had known he was walking to the Wall with that foul-smelling black devil Yoren. To pay for his one sweet moment, they took his whole life.

But now he meant to take it back, and Craster’s women too. That twisted old wildling has the right of it. If you want a woman to wife you take her, and none of this giving her flowers so that maybe she don’t notice your bloody boils. Chett didn’t mean to make that mistake again.

Like Tyrion, Chett is rejected by others for his appearance, has a violent father and a lot of resentment that comes out in the shape of murdering “slatterns”. He also mixes it up with the idea of marriage. Like Tyrion, the cold night reminds Chett of the girl in his past.

He could see Bessa’s face floating before him. It wasn’t the knife I wanted to put in you, he wanted to tell her. I picked you flowers, wild roses and tansy and goldencups, it took me all morning. His heart was thumping like a drum, so loud he feared it might wake the camp. Ice caked his beard all around his mouth. Where did that come from, with Bessa? Whenever he’d thought of her before, it had only been to remember the way she’d looked, dying. What was wrong with him?

Chett killed her in a rage, but the truth is layered and haunts him.

But back to Tyrion.

Tyrion VI emphasizes Tyrion’s cleverness as he converses with Bronn, explaining his strategy in the Vale for how to steal Bronn from Cat’s service and make use of his practical talents, and his strategy for their travels in the Mountains of the Moon. Tyrion talks, Bronn listens and agrees to serve him.

The point is, Tyrion is very observant and smart. Reader, trust Tyrion’s judgent and words, is the message. Then we get more personal.

As they light a fire and eat a goat, Tyrion remembers his goaler Mord who treated him cruelly in the sky cells.

(Mord, btw, translates to murder in many a germanic/Scandinvian language.)

“And yet you gave the turnkey a purse of gold,” Bronn said.

“A Lannister always pays his debts.”

Even Mord had scarcely believed it when Tyrion tossed him the leather purse. The gaoler’s eyes had gone big as boiled eggs as he yanked open the drawstring and beheld the glint of gold. “I kept the silver,” Tyrion had told him with a crooked smile, “but you were promised the gold, and there it is.” It was more than a man like Mord could hope to earn in a lifetime of abusing prisoners. “And remember what I said, this is only a taste. If you ever grow tired of Lady Arryn’s service, present yourself at Casterly Rock, and I’ll pay you the rest of what I owe you.” With golden dragons spilling out of both hands, Mord had fallen to his knees and promised that he would do just that.

The image of coins spilling from hands is picked up later.

Tyrion was hoping to lure in the mountain clans, but they take their time showing up, so he tries to be even more conspicuous.

Tyrion chuckled. “Then we ought to sing and send them fleeing in terror.” He began to whistle a tune.

He chooses the “terrible” tune himself. It leads straight to his memory:

“Myrish. ‘The Seasons of My Love.’ Sweet and sad, if you understand the words. The first girl I ever bedded used to sing it, and I’ve never been able to put it out of my head.” Tyrion gazed up at the sky. It was a clear cold night and the stars shone down upon the mountains as bright and merciless as truth. “I met her on a night like this,” he heard himself saying. “Jaime and I were riding back from Lannisport when we heard a scream, and she came running out into the road with two men dogging her heels, shouting threats.

Myrish, as in the Myrish lens. The object Lysa sends Catelyn, which has a false bottom hiding the real message in a secret language, a message of murder and conspiracy. A secret language, a foreign language, like Mord.

"A lens is an instrument to help us see." (AGOT, Catelyn II)

Bright and merciless as truth.

My brother unsheathed his sword and went after them, while I dismounted to protect the girl. She was scarcely a year older than I was, dark-haired, slender, with a face that would break your heart. It certainly broke mine. Lowborn, half-starved, unwashed … yet lovely. They’d torn the rags she was wearing half off her back, so I wrapped her in my cloak while Jaime chased the men into the woods. By the time he came trotting back, I’d gotten a name out of her, and a story. She was a crofter’s child, orphaned when her father died of fever, on her way to … well, nowhere, really.

Where Tysha went will become a theme. @une-nuit-pour-se-souvenir examines that beautifully here.

But even right here, the tone is ominous, and GRRM goes out of his way to emphasize it with the ellipses.

We get the story of Jaime chasing after the outlaws and Tyrion and Tysha falling into bed at an inn after drinking, eating and talking, and the story of their marriage, and its end.

Tyrion was surprised at how desolate it made him feel to say it, even after all these years. Perhaps he was just tired. “That was the end of my marriage.” He sat up and stared at the dying fire, blinking at the light.

“He sent the girl away?”

“He did better than that,” Tyrion said. “First he made my brother tell me the truth. The girl was a whore, you see. Jaime arranged the whole affair, the road, the outlaws, all of it. He thought it was time I had a woman. He paid double for a maiden, knowing it would be my first time.

NOTHING about this makes sense, which is ridiculous when you consider we were just hammered over the head with how smart Tyrion is supposed to be.

Since when is Jaime prone to setting up complex schemes? Why would feel the need to push Tyrion to have sex at thirteen, and why would be ever do it this way? Why would be hire him a virgin for his first time? We don’t question it because GRRM has told us not to question the smartiepants. But as we later learn, that was all. not. true. So maybe other things aren’t true, either.

“After Jaime had made his confession, to drive home the lesson, Lord Tywin brought my wife in and gave her to his guards. They paid her fair enough. A silver for each man, how many whores command that high a price? He sat me down in the corner of the barracks and bade me watch, and at the end she had so many silvers the coins were slipping through her fingers and rolling on the floor, she …” The smoke was stinging his eyes. Tyrion cleared his throat and turned away from the fire, to gaze out into darkness. “Lord Tywin had me go last,” he said in a quiet voice. “And he gave me a gold coin to pay her, because I was a Lannister, and worth more.”

The parallels to his memory of Mord are striking. Silver and gold, coins spilling from hands, a “price” beyond expectation... and a promise of something very sinister at the next meeting.

After a time he heard the noise again, the rasp of steel on stone as Bronn sharpened his sword. “Thirteen or thirty or three, I would have killed the man who did that to me.”

1) Nice how Bronn makes it about Tyrion’s pain. Tysha’s pain does not exist to them. And so the reader is also drawn away from it. Poor Tyrion.

2) Another reference to killing. It foreshadows Tyrion’s murder of Tywin over this very matter, of course, but at the same time...

Tyrion gestured impatiently with the bow. “Tysha. What did you do with her, after my little lesson?”

“I don’t recall.”

“Try harder. Did you have her killed?”

His father pursed his lips. “There was no reason for that, she’d learned her place … and had been well paid for her day’s work, I seem to recall. I suppose the steward sent her on her way. I never thought to inquire.”

“On her way where?”

“Wherever whores go.”

Tyrion’s finger clenched. (ASOS, Tyrion XI)

I don’t think it can be emphasized enough that this happens right after he murders Shae. Shae the whore.

“Did you ever like it?” He cupped her cheek, remembering all the times he had done this before. All the times he’d slid his hands around her waist, squeezed her small firm breasts, stroked her short dark hair, touched her lips, her cheeks, her ears. All the times he had opened her with a finger to probe her secret sweetness and make her moan. “Did you ever like my touch?”

“More than anything,” she said, “my giant of Lannister.”

That was the worst thing you could have said, sweetling.

Tyrion slid a hand under his father’s chain, and twisted. The links tightened, digging into her neck. “For hands of gold are always cold, but a woman’s hands are warm,” he said. He gave cold hands another twist as the warm ones beat away his tears.

And just before he asks him about Tysha, Tywin assures him he was meant to be sent to the Wall. Whether or not that’s a lie, we’re looking at another Chett parallel. Murdering a “slattern”, facing life at the Wall.

We close Tyrion’s memory of Tysha:

Tyrion swung around to face him. “You may get that chance one day. Remember what I told you. A Lannister always pays his debts.” He yawned. “I think I will try and sleep. Wake me if we’re about to die.”

He rolled himself up in the shadowskin and shut his eyes. The ground was stony and cold, but after a time Tyrion Lannister did sleep. He dreamt of the sky cell. This time he was the gaoler, not the prisoner, big, with a strap in his hand, and he was hitting his father, driving him back, toward the abyss …

Like Chett, his thoughts return to the girl. He turns into the goaler, Mord, his rage comes through, his capability of great violence. In ASOS, his lashing out at Tywin is preceeded by directing his violence toward the “whore” who allegedly betrayed him. Which is preceeded by a truth about Tysha.

“Thank you?” Tyrion’s voice was choked. “He gave her to his guards. A barracks full of guards. He made me … watch.” Aye, and more than watch. I took her too … my wife …

“I never knew he would do that. You must believe me.”

“Oh, must I?” Tyrion snarled. “Why should I believe you about anything, ever? She was my wife!”

“Tyrion—”

He hit him. It was a slap, backhanded, but he put all his strength into it, all his fear, all his rage, all his pain. Jaime was squatting, unbalanced. The blow sent him tumbling backward to the floor. “I … I suppose I earned that.”

“Oh, you’ve earned more than that, Jaime. You and my sweet sister and our loving father, yes, I can’t begin to tell you what you’ve earned. But you’ll have it, that I swear to you. A Lannister always pays his debts.” Tyrion waddled away, almost stumbling over the turnkey again in his haste. Before he had gone a dozen yards, he bumped up against an iron gate that closed the passage. Oh, gods. It was all he could do not to scream.

(ASOS, Tyrion XI)

The turnkey here is interesting. Once again, Tysha’s memory is associated with a cell and the presence of a turnkey. In his anguished memory, Tyrion almost stumbles over him. The last turnkey was Mord.

So, just looking at Tysha’s first mention, there are so many ominous connections. Murder murder murder.

The chapter ends with Tyrion meeting and “hiring” the mountain clans. How? To avenge himself on Lysa Arryn, he promises them the entire Vale. Really driving home that “a Lannister pays his debts” is all about disproportionate retribution.

A few chapter later, to create some distance to this dark tale, Tyrion meets Shae and sets up to re-create his entire Tysha trauma. The two are intertwined, so why should their ends not be?

That’s fodder for a different post, though.

#asoiaf #anti tyrion lannister #tysha #murder mystery #long post #Shae #tywin lannister #bronn #mismemory #memory edit

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gisachi · 5 years ago

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#42 for the shinran kissing prompts maybe? (thank you for the nice tags on my art btw 😉💜)

Thanks for this request! 💞 Ahh, what can I say, your doodles are so funny and so lovely to look at!! I’ve never had the proper chance to thank you for your tags on my posts too so I’ll take this opportunity. It makes me really happy that you like what I write ;;_;; So I remembered reading one of your tags saying that you like Domestic!ShinRan so I’mma give that to you rn. I really hope you like this! 🤗

42. Distracting kisses from someone that are meant to stop the other person from finishing their work, and give them kisses instead. (1,551 words)

9:00 PM.

It’s automatic, whenever the grandfather clock strikes 9:00 PM. Seconds after the last chime of the bell, he’ll hear the library door open, footsteps lightly approach him, then hundreds of pecks will wordlessly land on his cheek in the midst of his paperwork, disrupting the mind palace he’s put up for hours.

It did surprise him the first time, giving his wife a weirded out ‘What’s with you?’ look, but it doesn’t take a while for Pavlov to prove his theory to him when for the next four or five times, he begins to grow accustomed to this flow of events. He doesn’t even have to look at the clock; he just knows that once the library door clicks, it’s 9 o’clock, and he’s bound to ready his cheeks for the array of kisses that’ll shortly follow.

Though his mind has already been conditioned to this, Shinichi’s yet to admit that that is the most favorite thing he wants from his wife to do. After all, anyone who knows him knows that he must not be disturbed in the middle of his deductions. Well, they can, but at the expense of being ignored, or avoided, or humiliated for feeling like they’re talking to a brick wall.

Thus it has been a universal rule that a working Shinichi is an absolutely-cannot-be-disturbed Shinichi. And his wife knows this for sure.

Yet why? For what purpose is she doing this, persistently giving him something he never asked for? Something she isn’t even sure he wants, or needs?

Tonight is rather a busy night for him. He doesn’t usually bring home extra paperwork from the Department, but this present case - a child kidnapping case - calls for urgency. Since 5 PM, he hasn’t left the Kudo library and has even missed dinner. But hunger is nothing compared to the need for the case to be resolved as soon as possible. Time is the enemy. So for almost three hours, he reads, he closes his eyes, he writes, he thinks. On repeat.

“Yes, Megure-keibu. Yes. Among the suspects only the child’s aunt living in Minato ward can possibly do this. Said she’s never been in touch with the kid for years and- Yes. And yet she knows her routine after school. She’s been spying on her. Right. Please send the Team right away to her house. Be on guard. It’s possible there’s someone with her with a weapon. Mm. Let me know once the suspect is restrained.”

He paces back and forth the library, grave and relentless worry evident in his face. He waits, and waits, and waits. Forty minutes of frantic silence and tension, hunger and thirst unnoticed. For forty minutes his world zeroes in on just him and this case, not in the least mindful of his environment, of any sound other than his nervous heart and seeing nothing other than the flash of memories from back when he - and she - was young.

Finally, the awaited call arrives.

“Shinichi-kun, the culprit has been apprehended. Good job. We’ll hear more details on this tomorrow. You may now retire for the night.”

Thank goodness.

Slumping into his chair, he heaves a sigh of relief. “Thank you, Megure-keibu.”

He checks his phone clock. 8:58 PM. Wow, it took almost four hours. He doesn’t even realize. Oh, the effect of child kidnapping cases on him.

He stays in his chair, unmoving. That’s when it hits. The fatigue. The hunger. Minor unfinished paperwork still lays on his desk but he figures he needs a little breather.

For once he actually seeks for rest.

Ran.

8:59 PM.

How convenient. Now he just has to wait for one more minute. Then the grandfather clock will chime and the door will click and this time, he’s ready to welcome whatever intrusion there’ll be, as long as it’s from her.

Ran.

He closes his eyes, chuckles breathily. Hah.

For the first time, is he really actively waiting for her to come?

He waits, and waits, and waits.

Any time now.

Aaaany time.

9:01 PM.

9:10 PM. 9:15 PM.

9:20 PM.

Maybe it’s the tiredness acting up, and he’s not supposed to be cranky because he has just solved a kidnapping case, but right now, he cannot stop his brows from furrowing and his lips from curving upside down.

Where the hell is she?

Releasing an impatient groan, he decides to just continue with the minor paperwork. Maybe she’s already asleep; doesn’t wait for him anymore since he sure is taking his time with this. He mechanically grabs his pen, flips some pages over, and stares blankly at words.

Man... he’s pretty bummed.

“Done with the case?”

He jerks from his seat, heart leaping a little. Trying to keep a straight expression, he slowly turns to the door, and there she is. The woman he’s secretly waiting for.

Ran.

Shinichi watches her walk his direction before finally realizing how much he’s been staring, and then returns his attention to his paperwork.

“...Late.” He mumbles, so low she barely hears it.

She stops, quirks an eyebrow. “Oh. Were you waiting for me?”

“Wh— N-no. Not at all.”

How childish he might’ve sounded just now.

Trying to push past her teasing stare, he pretends to go over the piles of paper in front of him one by one.

But Ran knows her husband too well. She approaches his desk, and, after a faint giggle, gives a light peck on his visibly flustered cheeks.

“I tucked Sakura and Shinji to bed,” she says, giving an answer to his unspoken question. “Took me quite a while this time.”

He tilts his head, half-facing her. “And? Are they asleep now?”

“Yes.”

“Mm.”

She leans in for another peck and Shinichi instinctively offers his cheek, closing his eyes. Feeling her subtle smile against his skin, he cannot help but smile, too, as she gives him three more. Ran stands straight and sighs.

“You skipped dinner, Shinichi. I’ll heat up your food, okay?” She steps away, only to be abruptly stopped by a stubborn tug of his hand on her wrist.

“Ran, that’s...not enough.”

Swiveling his chair to face her, he opens his arms, catching Ran dumbfounded from where she stands. Then, without any word, she retraces her steps, slowly, until she’s standing between his legs, and his arms wrap around her waist.

“I was.”

“Was what?”

“Waiting.”

Cheeks dusting with red, Shinichi holds her gaze as she stares him down his seat; her eyes wide at the unexpected declaration before narrowing into slits.

“Mmm, really? M’not bothering you with your work?” She nudges her head to his desk.

“Nope.”

“But that’s not what I was getting before.”

“Hmm?”

“You've never reciprocated my kisses then,” she puffs her cheeks.

“Well…”

"You didn’t even notice I checked up on you before 9 o’clock. You were too engrossed with the case, spanning the room back and forth like a madman.”

“You did?”

“Yeah, so I figured it’s probably better not to disturb you until you’re done with it...don’t wanna risk being yelled at.”

“I’m not-“

“Oh, Shinichi. I understand, you don’t want any disturbance when solving cases, not even from your wife—“

He cuts her off with a kiss on the lips, dissolving Ran’s further complaints in his mouth.

“That’s not true,” he declares, then kisses her again, chastely. “Keep on doing that, okay? ‘Disturbing’ me or whatever...Even if I look serious,” another kiss. “Or annoyed.” Kiss. “Or cannot be bothered.” Long kiss. “Just...don’t stop doing that.”

He pauses for a good minute, admiring how she looks with her brows still wrinkled but face and ears now more crimson than his.

Ah. Yes— Now it’s clear.

What a shame for not having realized this sooner.

Breaking off his loving gaze, Ran pinches his cheeks, pulling them like dough. “Who says anything about stopping? Who’s gonna tuck you to bed when that happens?”

“Oh okay,” he chuckles, “so you’re really doing this whole thing to annoy me, huh?”

“Of course. Is there any other reason?”

He kisses her again, smiles fondly against her lips. “Because you love me?”

She returns the kiss, reciprocates the smile he doesn’t even bother hiding. “Now you’re being cocky.”

Hands intertwined, foreheads together, eyes closed, soft giggles lingering, husband and wife drown in each other’s comfort, forgetting about the time and hunger and everything else, his long day ending with her, at last. No one can take away this moment from them this time. Not even the minor unfinished paperwork.

Yes. This woman. His wife. Ran.

The only distraction he’ll ever want, and ever need.

“Aren’t you going to ask me what the case was all about?” He speaks softly, a little above a whisper.

“What is it?”

“Child kidnapping case.”

“Oh no,” Ran separates from him, expression visibly concerned, “and you’ve solved it?”

“Yes. The TMPD already apprehended the culprit.”

“That’s a relief,” she returns her forehead to his. “Though Shinichi, honestly I’ve never seen you so invested in a case before.”

“Yeah. It hits close to home.”

“What do you mean?”

Silence, then he takes a deep breath.

“Did you know that you were almost kidnapped when we were in Kindergarten?”

“I was almost...what?!”

“Let’s save that bedtime story for later. Dinner first?”

#shinran #fanfic #OMG I saw your recent doodle and the second one looks almost like the kiss position in this prompt!! AHAHAHAhahskdhs #bless #hope this is ok!!#before i started writing this i read a very angsty Shinran fic #so after that i was like WELP need to feed my heart with ShinRan fluff!!!#and now i have this #been revising this for hours so imma publish now so theres no more backing down lmao #kiss prompts

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crqstalite · 4 years ago

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fic back friday.

i wasn’t actually tagged for this, but poking around on my ao3, aftermath was published only a year prior to now (april 14th, 2020! wow, time is meaningless!). there’s nothing special about the date to be entirely honest, i guess the thought just amuses me, now looking back on a far less developed kodee and my first - albeit hasty, published a few days after finishing mass effect 3 for the first time - fic for mass effect.

beyond the point. aftermath mostly focused on a few months after the end of mass effect three, a sort of reunion fic for the characters, primarily kodelyn and kaidan. it reads a lot like my old writing, lots of monologuing, too many analogies, not enough dialogue. that and that there’s nothing inherently special about it. here kodee reads like any other shepard, and it was long before i gave her any real distinctive personality. beyond what’s below the cut, i characterized the pair of them...just weird. like off somehow. doesn’t read right anymore and i kinda avoid it like the plague at times. i did actually meander back through the fic itself while hunting around for snippets that i liked, and it’s?? not bad. i’m not a huge fan of it anymore (read: not exactly hate but definitely not love either) but it’s a nice benchmark of sorts to see just how far i’ve come in just over a year. under the cut is a few paragraphs if you don’t want to subject yourself to the whole work. it’s not canon to the eye of the storm continuity, btw.

(another interesting note is that i think between this and the original ‘i have questions’ that eventually grew into redamancy is how a handful of people in the ME fandom found me in the first place. there are a few now-mutuals who left comments on this one in particular that i have actually either spoken to a few times now or regularly talk to these days. what a small world.)

It's a blur getting to the hospital from the Normandy. First, everyone is in denial. That there's no way Kodee survived. Kaidan doesn't care. Hell, he was about to just run on foot if that took him to his wife faster. But the docking manager had been sincere. Every account said that Kodelyn Alenko was alive and working at Huerta. People don't believe it's him, C-Sec officers want to stop him through security. He hears Tali making half-hearted apologies alongside Garrus' sarcastic ones.

Hackett had gotten patched in at some point, Kaidan didn't know when. But the story they'd gotten was missing pieces, as if even he didn't understand the miracle that she was. Yet, she was alive and well. Had even started a memorial program for biotics, named after him. Lived up in his old apartment. Was getting reinstated for the second time in the coming weeks.

Liara makes the comment she really shouldn't have been alive. Kaidan knows it's true. He keeps from snapping at her.

He's out of the cab before it even stops, pouring on the speed and flying through the halls on the trails of hope. The thought she might be with someone else now, it crosses his mind but he doesn't care. The adrenaline is pumping through his veins, hell he's left Joker in the dust with EDI. Liara and Garrus have just barely caught up with him once he sees the check-in desk. The wide eyes of patrons don't matter as he searches the eyes and faces for the woman he loves.

Kodee can't stop asking for confirmation, from anyone. From Raya, from the nurses and the doctors. No one has a solid answer except for that the Normandy really was docked in Bay D-24. The ghost ship had finally come back to the Citadel. Everyone had been accounted for by the docking manager. Jeff Moreau, Liara T'soni, Tali'Zorah Nar Rayya Vas Normandy, Garrus Vakarian, James Vega. EDI had been among them as well, though they hadn't immediately managed to classify her as part of the crew.

The moment Kaidan Alenko hits the voice of Raya, that's the moment she feels like the world shatters around her. That the last seven months hadn't been for nothing. More aggressive than necessary, she demands she know where they all are. She apologizes once the Asari says she truly doesn't know. Kodee leaves her coat behind, willing the elevator to move faster as it hits the ground floor. Playing with her hair, eventually deciding to tie it up as she races out of the elevator.

Through the labs, she gets odd stares. This wasn't like the usually pacifist Mrs. Alenko, odd for someone of her status. What was going on, no one knew. Her heart swells, hoping there isn't a lie behind what she's been told. Where they've been.

She hits the patient lounge, and the doors slide open just as she enters the room.

Time stills. The lounge isn't full, but it isn't as if they don't have an audience.

His deep auburn eyes meet her matching set from across the room.

He's disheveled, he knows that. He hasn't seen hair product in months. His clothes have ripped from various adventures after the crash.

She's put together, hair pulled back and wearing clothes she wouldn't be caught dead in during her service on the Normandy.

He remembers everything about her. More scars, yes. Longer hair that reaches her shoulders in a ponytail. But the way she freezes, her lips gently parted, he remembers that. Remembers every curve and muscle on her body.

She sees him for what he is, but still knows who he was. His hair had grown out, he had more of a five o'clock shadow than usual -- maybe twelve. But his stance, as he just barely manages to skid to stop. Remembers every touch, remembers how it made her feel.

Liara and Garrus just barely hit the lounge before time starts again.

Then, they've flown into each other's arms. Tears flowing down their cheeks as they hold each other so tightly. Like they can't fathom how the other is here. Like if they let go, they'll wake up from the dream. She can't breathe, through choked sobs and how tight he holds her, surprised that he and the crew hadn't died. He can't believe she's here, spending so long thinking she was dead. Their names cross each other's lips a few times before they're breathing hard and finally look up at one another properly. The kiss is hard, there's loss and sadness behind it but hope within it. Her hands are shaking, and the way she holds his face with her hands is so reminiscent of the battle for Earth. But he's not crying because he's lost her, God he's crying because he's found her.

Leaning their foreheads against each other and shaking with their laughter, they become all too aware of the crew joining them. Cheers from the patients and attendants alike for the two human Spectres. Liara first as she nearly flies over to her Commander, her own tears so evident as she runs up to her, Tali following after. James even manages a hug in, saying something about thinking Lola was dead. Garrus allows her a hug shortly after. EDI and Joker bring up the rear, and though it so very clearly pains him, he runs as fast as he can up to her as well. She's never been this happy to see her pilot. All of them are laughing or crying, or really both. EDI seems wary at first, as if she doesn't belong before she steals a hug from the AI.

#fic back friday #or saturday?#technically im queuing this for saturday because i didnt want it to get buried #but yknow #it was written friday so it counts

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bittywitches · 5 years ago

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Take Your Time (Grayson Dolan Fanfic)

A/N: This is basically me becoming super obsessed with the idea of husband!Grayson and I wanted to write a cute husband and wife thing rlly badlyyy >.<

The idea is y/n is working at this newspaper but there’s an opening for a more executive position and she has to do this application for it which she’s super stressed out about. Grayson is there to help her feel a little better :)

(oh btw do y’all want me to do word counts? idk lmk)

Anyways thank you babies for reading ily <3

The click of the door shutting after a long day of work was really what Grayson needed to hear.

He was absolutely exhausted, as he spent the entire day showing this one particularly annoying couple multiple downtown houses that seemed to fit their requests only for them to conclude with the idea that they’d rather get an apartment instead.

He kicked off his shoes and sighed deeply, stretching out his back. His feet ached from having to walk the two to so many different residences, but either way, he was getting paid for it.

“Babe, I’m home!”

“Hi, honey!”

Grayson followed his wife’s voice and found her in the office room sitting cross-legged in the wheely chair. Her hair was up in a messy bun, and she was wearing a loose T-shirt and checkered pajama pants.

“How’s the most gorgeous girl in LA doing?” He threw his jacket and bag onto the armchair.

“Awful.” She swiveled around to face him and had her arms stretched out reaching for him. He hugged her, rubbing her back, and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

“How come, baby?”

“Ugh, it’s this stupid application stuff.” She turned back around to the computer. Grayson pulled up a chair and sat beside her.

“What’s the issue?”

“That’s the thing, I don’t know!” She threw her hands up in the air. “It’s like anything I write, there’s just something wrong with it that I can’t put my finger on. I swear, I’ve written like seven versions of this exact same article.”

“It’s probably just the stress of having to get it done for tomorrow.” He rubbed her arm. “Don’t be too hard on yourself.”

She sighed. “But this article has to be perfect. This job could mean so much to me, I’d finally be able to have so much more control on the paper’s projects.” She looked over at him. “I really think I can do some good for this company. So I really don’t want to screw this up. It’s probably going to be my only chance.”

Grayson got up and kissed her on the forehead. “Whatever you write, they’re going to absolutely love it. I promise.”

She smiled. “Thank you, baby.”

He returned it. “I’m gonna go change. Have you eaten yet?”

“No, lost track of time.”

“Want me to make something?”

“Don’t worry about it, you’re probably tired from work.” She grabbed his arm. “Oh! Speaking of, how did it go with that couple?”

Grayson rolled his eyes. “I don’t want to distract you from your work, but to give you the short answer: not the greatest.”

“Aw, bub.”

“It’s okay. I’ll tell you about it after. Want me to heat up the leftover lasagna?”

“Yes, please.”

“You got it.”

...

A few minutes later, Grayson was in the kitchen, getting the leftovers from last night out of the fridge. He’d changed into an old T-shirt and sweatpants.

He put the food in the microwave and started it. He yawned, stretching his arms above his head, groaning a little bit. He leaned against the kitchen island.

Y/N had been working on this application for the past few days, and Grayson had to admit, he was glad it would be done by tomorrow. He obviously wanted her to get the job she wanted, but he hated how much it was stressing her out. He hadn’t had much time himself to help her out since his job had been taking up a lot of his time the past week. He wanted to do something special to relax her, but time sometimes just got the best of him.

He did love how passionate she was about writing, though. She worked so hard, it made him feel motivated to do more too. He just wished she would give herself a moment to breathe every once in a while. But then again, that is what he was there for.

He had started to fiddle with his wedding ring, which he tended to do quite often whenever he got lost in thought. It was a simple piece of jewelry, contrasting quite a bit to his father’s. It was a simple silver band, engraved with the initials of both his and her name. It was probably one of his favourite things in the whole world because it made it feel like she was always with him even when she wasn’t.

He smiled to himself, thinking how, just three years before, he dreamed of spending the rest of his life with Y/N. And now he was.

“Babe, come eat!” He shouted.

“Yea, in a minute...”

“Gorgeous come on, you need to eat.” He took the plates out of the microwave and set them onto the dining table.

“I gotta finish this Gray...”

Grayson walked back to the office room. “Baby, what did you eat for lunch?”

“Uhh.. stuff..” she was completely concentrated on her article.

“Y/N.” he spun the chair around, jerking her away from her somewhat trance-like state.

“Honey, please! I need to get this done!”

“You don’t have to starve yourself to do that!”

She groaned. “Babe I don’t have time-“

“Y/N. come eat.” He grabbed her wrists, trying to pull her up.

She narrowed her eyes at him. “I hate you.”

“I love you too, gorgeous.” He pulled her up and kissed her. She finally stopped straining against him and relaxed against his touch.

She pulled away. “I really missed you today.”

Grayson sighed. “I know. I’m sorry.” He wrapped his arms around her waist and she stretched hers around his neck. “I missed you too.”

She smiled a bit. “You know, we should go out this weekend. We haven’t done that in a while.” She played with the hair on the back of his head.

“Yea? What do you have in mind?”

“I don’t know. Just something.” She kissed him again, then let go. “Okay, come on. I’m starving.”

The pour of the water from the tap as Grayson cleaned the dishes was just overshadowed by the sound of the television in the living room. He rinsed off the dirty plates and set them on the rack.

“Hey, hon, how’s Ethan doing? Did you call him today?”

“Yea, he’s good.” He wiped his hands off on the rag and made his way over to the sofa where Y/N was sitting. “I’m glad you decided to take a break.”

She rolled her eyes as Grayson sank into the seat beside her. “Only because I’m basically done and just have to edit.”

“Mmm, either way.” He kissed her cheek.

“What’d Ethan say?”

“He just said we should all hang out soon. Maybe this weekend.”

She jerked her head to face him. “But I thought we were going to-“

“And I told him that we were busy,” she rubbed her arm. “So maybe we could meet up for dinner another time.”

Y/N smiled. “I’m sorry. You probably wanna hang out with him. It’s been like four days since you guys have been able to actually do anything together. That’s like a century for you guys.”

Grayson laid back, and Y/N nuzzled herself up against his chest. “It’s been a rough week for both of us. I think we need some time just together too.” He rubbed her shoulder and kissed her temple.

She sighed. “What did I do to deserve someone like you?”

“You stole my heart, that’s what you did.”

“Yeah well...” she laid her head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat. “You never asked for it back.”

He brushed his fingers through her strands of hair. “That’s because I wished you’d take the rest of me too.”

She blushed. “Well lucky for you then, huh?”

“Oh yeah.”

Y/N took his hand that was laying on his stomach. “I love you, baby.”

“I know.”

She slapped his stomach, sitting up abruptly. “Grayson Dolan!”

He laughed. “Oh, I’m kidding princess.” He cupped her cheeks in his hands. “I love you so much. I’ll never be able to show you just how much I do.”

He leaned in and kissed her. Soft, but meaningful.

Y/N suddenly pulled away. “Oh my god, my article!” She got up, but Grayson grabbed her wrist.

“Noooo, stayyy baby girl.”

“Oh my god, you literally kill me.” She pulled away from him. “But I have to work babe. Just keep watching the show, Okay?”

“I literally forgot the Tv was even on.” He gave her big puppy dog eyes.

“Give me a half-hour.”

“But snuggles!”

“Babyyy.”

“Oh, fine. Okay.”

An hour later, Gray walked into the office room with two cups of tea. He knocked on the side of the door. “Am I intruding?”

Y/N finally looked away from her screen. “Hm? Oh, no not at all.”

Gray handed her one of the cups, and she took it gratefully. “Mmm, thank you.”

“Are you going to be done anytime soon?”

She stretched. “I actually think I’m about done.”

“Great, can we go to bed?”

She shook her head. “I was wondering if you could read it over?”

“Oh of course baby,” he placed his cup on the table and swiveled over to her. “What do you want me to do?”

“I don’t know. Just review it, tell me if it sounds weird, if it’s not going for the vibe I’m looking for, even just grammatical stuff. I’ve been staring at this thing for so long I think it just needs a fresh pair of eyes.”

“You got it. Just bear with me, I’m a really slow reader.”

“Take your time honey.”

After a few minutes, Grayson looked back over to his wife, who was sitting in the armchair.

“It looks really good honey. Just, okay c’mere a sec..”

“Mhm.” She walked Over to the computer.

“You see this part? You could talk less about it but focus more on what’s in the next paragraph.”

“Hmm, ok yea I see that.”

“Also this part-“ he scrolled down. “It’s like a lot of information all at once. It’s like, too dense. You get what I mean?”

She pulled a chair over, skimming over the section. “Yeaa, your right.” She dragged the laptop over to her and started typing something up. “Is this better?” She pushed it back over to him.

“Yes, this is a lot easier to follow. Just do that with the next part too, and I think it’ll be better.”

“Ok. Thank you so much, baby.”

Grayson got up and moved his chair over so Y/N could reposition herself. “No problem, hon.” He kissed her forehead.

“I'm gonna go wait for you in bed, okay?”

“Alright.”

“Don’t stay up too late.”

“I won’t.”

Another hour later, Grayson shuffled back over to the office room once more. He’d almost fallen asleep but was determined to stay awake until his wife was done.

He rubbed his eye and yawned. “Babe I think it’s time to just let it be done. You must be exhausted-“

Grayson stopped when he saw the small figure of Y/N laying her head down on the table, completely passed out.

“Aw, honey..”

He tiptoed over to her, listening to her soft breathing. The light from the screen illuminated her hair and bounced off of the now empty cup of tea she finished. She was sleeping on top of many papers and files. He looked up at the screen and saw the email she had drafted to send her application in. He sat down next to her for a bit, and opened up the documents she had attached, making sure all of them were there and skimming through them to make sure they were ready to go. He quickly finished it up for her, just adding some thanks and signing her name, and sent it.

“Y/N?” He rubbed her back slowly. “You wanna come to bed now?” He chuckled to himself.

“Mmmm.”

“You never listen to me, so you?” He reached under her arms and legs and gently lifted her up bridal style. She groaned slightly, but she only seemed to stir slightly to muzzle herself closer into Grayson’s chest.

He shook his head. “You are so adorable.”

He walked back to their bedroom and gently placed her onto the bed, covering her up with the blanket. She grabbed the nearest pillow and squeezed it. He kissed her on the forehead.

“Goodnight, baby.”

Two weeks later, Y/N was idly scrolling through her phone while Grayson was making dinner when suddenly she got a notification from her email. She opened it to find...

“OH MY GOD!”

A clang was heard in the kitchen, like something falling onto the ground, and was followed by Grayson racing out of the kitchen.

“WHAT? What’s wrong?”

Y/N jumped up from the couch and turned her phone screen to Grayson, jumping up and down.

“OH MY FUCKING GOD I GOT THE JOB!”

His terrified expression was quickly replaced with one of excitement. “Oh my god, Congrats baby!” He spread his arms wide and Y/N ran towards him, practically jumping onto him to give him a hug.

“Oh my god oh my god oh my god I can’t believe I got the job!!”

“I’m so proud of you baby!!” He picked her up into the air and spun her around while she squealed.

“I can’t believe this is actually happening.” She pulled away from him to read the email in her phone again, her face absolutely glowing.

“You deserve it, hon. You worked so hard for this.” He smiled, then his eyes lit up. “OH my god, we need to celebrate!”

Y/N grabbed his face and kissed him, startling him so bad he almost fell backward. She pulled away from him, grinning like a fool.

“Or, you know. That works too.” He chuckled.

She laughed as well. “Grayson, I never would’ve been able to get this job without you.”

His arms made their way around her. “What are you talking about? You did this all on your own.”

“False. Without you, I probably would’ve killed myself before I got it done.” The edge of Grayson’s mouth quirked up, but he let her continue. “You were so supportive the past few weeks, and I really needed it. Thank you. So much.”

The warmth of his forehead pressed against hers spread through her. “I’m always going to be here for you, Y/N. that’s what you get for deciding to marry me.”

Her fingers grazed his jawline. “Well, I guess I made a good decision then, huh?”

“Mhmm.” He leaned and kissed her once more. The warmth and flavour of his lips spread through her. Her arms made their way up into his hair, then she bit his lip, making him moan.

She smirked. “You know, there is something we could do to celebra-“ a loud beeping noise suddenly disrupted her, and she watched as Grayson’s eyes suddenly widened.

“Oh my god the food!” He let go of Y/N and rushed back into the kitchen, followed by her Y/N’s laughs. A loud clang was heard, probably him dropping the steaming pot into the sink, then Grayson peaked his head around the corner.

“So.. how’re you feeling about take-out?”

She rolled her eyes. “Yea yea. I’ll order.”

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julz321 · 6 years ago

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Stop Settling for Less than Good Enough LGBT representation

Earlier this year I did a video on Bury Your Gays and Hiding Your Gays, two tropes where creators will either have their characters keep their homosexuality ambiguous or use death in order to cover it up as soon as they introduce the idea of a character being gay.

Not too long ago, Young Justice released an episode where two character, Bart Allen and Eduardo Dorado Jr., were supposedly on a date. When I heard about this I wanted to check out the episode out of curiosity and also because I like Impulse. Loved him since the original Young Justice comic series by Peter David. But I was mostly skeptical. Turns out I had every right to be skeptical.

What was so offensive about it? During the first half of the episode, several characters members were allowed to show how in love they are, holding hands, kissing, and basically show that they were on a date. It was clear this was a couples day out. Although Static commented on how he really needed a girlfriend and that he felt like an extra wheel.

Bart and Eduardo interact a bit, ride the same bumper car together, and try and share some cotton candy. But it’s so frustrating because there is nothing substantial.

What supports the idea of Bart and Eduardo? The fact Static felt like an extra wheel but did not mention Bart and Eduardo. He wouldn’t need to say that if he could just hang with the two and not feel left out.

Also Greg Wiseman has been “subtly” entertaining the idea of LGBT characters on the show via twitter. Mostly liking people’s tweets talking about how excited they are about the (supposed) new paring.

This is infuriating on so many levels. How is it that all the other straight characters on the show can show off how in love they are, hugging, holding hands, and kissing yet the supposed gay couple cannot. And Greg Wiseman seems to entertaining the idea but without saying anything definitive. Which feels very unsettling because I like Wiseman’s work but I would hate if he went the same route as JDS and Montgomery from Voltron. Have gay representation but keep is so vague and expect praise and admiration for how “ground breaking” their work is.

And from what I hear, Bart and Eduardo are on a self-destruction route. Oh goodie, why do I feel like this is Shiro all over again?!

Guys, we need to stop settling for less. We deserve better. Vague hints at gay relationships are not good enough. And praising creators for limp handed and at worst clearly offensive attempts at gay representation does not help. It just makes them complacent when they don’t feel like they got something wrong. We deserve to see gay character, gay superhero characters hug, hold hands, kiss, call each other boyfriends or girlfriends as openly as straight characters.

And Young Justice has even less of an excuse if it wants to be “more grown up” or “taken seriously” especially when gay representation is simpler than you think. I’ve said how simple it is in my videos, you just need to commit. If you can write all these straight relationships then you can write, at least, ONE gay couple. That’s how easy it is.

For a show that people gush about how serious and more grown up it is and how complex it is, it says a lot when a show like Loud House can do something so simple as to portray two teenage girls on a date and call it a “date” and have each other blush at each other, make cheesy love poems, giving a heart-shaped guitar pick, and talk about how they wanna experience new things together.Friends even being fully supportive and knowing it is a date too!

Sure, there was no kiss, but it’s a frak tone more progress than what we’ve been getting from Voltron or Young Justice.

Ruby and Sapphire from Steven Universe have never said “I love you” even once. And we constantly use the fact that the gems are genderless as an excuse instead of handling the idea of them being gay directly.

JUST SAY BOYFRIEND, GIRLFRIEND, WIFE, HUSBAND!

Heck Rooster Teeth had a married lesbian couple and didn’t waffle around it and it was SO SIMPLE. They’re being schooled by Rooster Teeth! OMG!

And before anyone makes a fuss over how angry I am, first off, frak off. Two, as a gay person you can imagine my discontent when walked into this episode, with some hope one of my favorite Teen Titans and YJ members was supposedly going on a date with another guy (btw we don’t need to follow the comics 100%) and that maybe the talented Wiseman could do it right, but instead all I get more vagary about a gay couple’s relationship while all the straight characters can be causal about their relationships and be open about it. All it does it make your gay fans feel exploited or alienated. Consider how many gay people felt like how I felt, the feeling of having to keep your relationship on the down-low while all your straight friends can freely and openly show off how in love they are.

It’s not good enough anymore guys. Vague hints are not good enough. Confirmation via twitter outside of the show is not good enough. Characters being put through the meat grinder is not good enough. We’ve been waiting for so long, we’ve been writing relationships since the dawn of time.

We can do better. It’s not a matter of skill, it’s whether or not a creator is willing to commit and get off their ass.

And you can bet hat a lot of people were angry about Bart and Eduardo. Sure some people were trying to stay positive and give Wiseman the benefit of the doubt but even their good faith is waning. It’s not good enough.

Stop settling for less.

#lgbt representation #Young Justice #eduardo dorado jr #bart allen

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lgcdasom · 5 years ago

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HELLO EVERYONE ! ✖ ◞ guess whooooo - it’s faye, the typist behind both lgcjiao & lgcmiyoung, and i am so excited to introduce y’all to my last muse here at legacy. i tried hard to make this girl different than my other two muses, but also still wanted to have some fun with her. so here we are - introducing lee dasom, the 23 year old newly signed trainee. she basically joined not knowing wtf she was getting sucked into. i’ve placed some little bits of information about her under the cut, but you can fully read up on her on the ABOUT page. and while her plots page is still under construction, i would love to get some interactions going for her. so please give this a LIKE if you’re down to plot and i’ll slide into your dms. there will be a follow up post after this for the events, so keep your eyes peeled for that as well!

CONTACT ME : here, on twitter under foxglves, or on discord at 𝙁𝘼𝙔𝙀.#7009

so pre - dasom: dasom’s mom grew up in the states, born to a trophy wife/socialite mother & a father who passed away when she was young. she came from a pretty wealthy family, grew up with top-notch education, etc. she moves to sk to attend university and there she meets dasom’s father.

cont. without her mother’s approval, dasom’s mom and dad get married quickly after meeting each other. friends and family think they’ll fail, think her father is a deadbeat with no aspirations. but then out pops dasom and she’s suddenly the peacemaker of the family lmao

1997 and up: dasom is an only child, born to a musician father and a mother who taught at a small university. they never really struggled much, her grandmother was always quick to send money their way after dasom came into the picture. she grew up getting anything she asked within reason, but she never really acted like a spoiled brat

dasom’s father is basically a musical genius, and loves to teach his daughter everything he knows. he teaches her the guitar, how to write lyrics, and how to sing songs with him. they basically do it for fun and dasom keeps up the hobby, but she finds her interests later in life.

her father starts up a band named geunal when she’s about 13, and dasom loves to listen to them play. she grows rather close with the other members in the years they’re together and thinks of them like family.

random fact: she worked in a thrift shop in high school, quit when she graduated and had to focus on university/her dance team.

she joins satellite, a competitive dance team, in 2016 and fleshes out her love for dance there. she meets most of her good friends while in the group and still talks to them years later.

goes to university and graduates with a degree in dance.

TW DEATH/ACCIDENT (2018) her grandmother arranges geunal a gig at a musical festival in the states, and it’s literally one of the best things to happen to them. they’re all excited, but dasom decides to fly down a day after everyone else because of a dance competition. unfortunately, there is a plane crash that ends up taking the lives of both of her parents and a band member. dasom takes their passing pretty hard, and immense guilt overtakes her. END TW

after her parents’ deaths, dasom drops dancing because she associates it with her guilt, quits the team and decides to pack up and move in with her grandmother in the states (2019) for awhile. there she just really focuses on herself and her grief and also gives her grandmother comfort during this time.

random fact: she brought her dog, soju, over with her to the states but he’s staying over there until dasom gets her footing back in seoul

dasom arrives back in sk at the end of 2019, and is ready to start her life back up. she’s used some money from her parents’ life insurance/selling the house to rent an apartment. also gets a job as a bartender to make some extra money while she’s trying to figure out what to do with a dance degree she wants nothing to do with.

random fact: as a trainee, her lease hasn’t ended yet so she still technically has the apartment even as a trainee. she stays at the dorms during the week usually, but finds herself at the apartment on the weekends.

she avoids dancing at all costs, but she’s back with her regular group of friends - hanging out and TW ALCOHOL MENTION drinking her problems away at times. END TW

new years comes and a bet is placed - dasom vs some other friend ( possible connection? ), who will get into legacy? she’s drunk when she agrees, but she figures what the hell bc she won’t get in anyway.

jan 2020 - she auditions by singing and playing a bit of the drums. gets in and she’s at a loss bc now wtf is she supposed to do

random fact: she started practicing drums in high school!

she has no idea what to expect when training begins and she hates it. she sticks around solely for curiosity but right when she’s about to call it quits, she finds hope. the announcement of the subsidiaries gives her the hope that maybe she can make her father proud by becoming a producer, or even joining a band.

OOC NOTE: i have no idea what path i’m putting her on in the future, i’m just letting this muse lead me and see where it takes us!

PERSONALITY NOTES: overall, dasom is pretty laid-back. she’s not overly serious or critical in anyway, and is rather confident in her musically abilities. dancing is still a sore spot for her, which is awkward as a trainee, but she mainly just half asses it in the dancing classes and pushes through it.

cont. she loves to party but she’s really a homebody; you’re not hanging with her on the weekends with her crew if you aren’t close/relatively familiar. she’s still dealing with a lot of grief but she feels like she should be over it. she allowed herself an entire year to mourn, and she feels like she should be back to normal now. but it’s not obviously and it’s taking a toll on her mentally. but she doesn’t really share this with anyone.

cont. her cousin is @lgcallie btw!! she will literally beat ur ass if you mess with her. seriously.

cont. her attitude as a trainee is she really keeps to herself? can come off cold or standoffish but she’s very loving when you get close to her. she loves to laugh and have fun, will basically enjoy anyone who isn’t a complete asshole or dimwit.

yay that’s it ;; thank you so much for reading all of this if you did, here’s a heart ♡

#✖･ﾟ ━━ OUT OF CHEESE .#{ * sorry this is soooo long but I LOVE HER #the beginning is mostly about her past #skip towards the end for the more current/personality bits if you want! }#{ * this might have spelling errors but ITS OKAY }

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noccalula-writes · 5 years ago

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What are your favorite games and franchises? Top 5?

OH BOY have I got feelings on this subject.

Please keep in mind - I’m a storyteller and a writer. I fucking /love/ a good story. I DM a DnD game and my biggest weakness is that I don’t often include enough combat because I am so much more interested in telling a story. So for me, there’s got to be an emotional investment for a game to really land. I also hyperfixate like a motherfucker so I often refuse to pick up new things purely because there’s not enough space in my head for them at the time, so I’m slow getting to things as they come out.

So, I’m first and foremost a survival horror bitch. I cut my teeth on Parasite Eve before I played any others - my mother scrimped and saved and fought her way through Wal-mart back in like 1998 to get me the original Playstation gaming console and Tekken 2 (which was my first PS game, I played it in an arcade near her barber shop as a child - Tomb Raider 2 was my second). The old Playstation discs at that time came with demos for different games, including Metal Gear Solid, which I replayed until I could have done it in my sleep because poverty meant I wasn’t likely to get another game anytime soon. I mention this because the Parasite Eve trailer used to give me nightmares but I was super, super hooked.

I am a huge Silent Hill fan. Huge. That is a tragedy I could write a whole ‘nother post about, because as excited as I am to finally get my hands on Death Stranding (again, poverty, so it’ll be another minute before we can get a PS4), we’ll never get another SH game again unless some major reconciliation happens with Kojima and Konami, which is unlikely (and also hard to hope for - I’m happy Kojima now has the creative freedom to go as balls to the wall as he wants).

I am an equally huge Resident Evil fan. I’ve always maintained that my first fandom was The X Files, but my wife pointed out a few nights ago that my RE love started around the same time in the late 90′s, so now it’s a chicken and egg kind of thing. Point being, it’s either The or One Of my longest lasting fandoms/interests. RE and Silent Hill get compared to one another a lot - RE7 did nothing to help that - but they really are apples and oranges to me. Fruit, sure, but two totally different tones and experiences.

I’ve been a huge Tomb Raider fan for forever - my first high school boyfriend was loaded and bought me Angel of Darkness to come play at his house and while it was def critically panned, I do recall enjoying it - so that’s been fun to get those games remade with updated graphics. I’ve only played the one but the others are def on The List.

So now that I’ve talked for an hour, my Top 5 fave games ever -

#1 - Resident Evil 3 I am beyond jazzed for this remake, and a lot of people in the 90′s complained about RE3′s lack of clear cut boss battles, but I don’t know what they’re talking about. The entire fucking game is a boss battle - Jill vs. Raccoon City, and of course, Nemesis, who used to give my mother nightmares and caused me to sleep with a leaf-stabber by my bed for years. Jill is far and away my favorite protagonist in RE; she’s got a resilience of the spirit that somehow isn’t conflated with naivety, which is uncommon in ‘nice’ female protags. She’s savvy but she’s still kind, and she’s committed as fuck to survival - not to mention, as zealotous a Chris and Jill shipper as I am, she and Carlos had hella chemistry and I’m excited to see where that goes (JD Pardo would have made a fuck of a Carlos Oliviera, btw). It was An Experience and it’s forever at my #1.

#2 - The Last of Us

There is no comparison for emotional weight in video games, as far as I’m concerned. SPOILERS if you don’t already know the ending (this game came out in what, 2014?) but to me one of the biggest thing in the game’s favor is that the protagonist made the wrong choice. He had an option to potentially eradicate the cordyceps fungus and maybe save the world, turn the tides back for humanity, and with the weight of the world in the balance, he chose to save Ellie instead. It was, on a global scale, the wrong choice - but it was the human choice. It was the thing that a dad who never properly grieved his dead daughter would do for the surrogate daughter he inherited by accident. As for Ellie, there is no other character quite like her in games, and she’s fucking quality LGBT representation, especially considering how little we see queer children in media. I still cry every time, we play this game twice a year like clockwork and every single time, I still cry.

#3 - Silent Hill 3

All of SH’s games will have a special place in my heart - and if you wanna talk shit about Downpour, I’ll meet you in the Denny’s parking lot at 11, you better square the fuck up because I will defend Murphy with fists - but 3 is the best, hands down. I felt like it did the best job of streamlining the series’ ... uhm... somewhat complicated lore into something more understandable. SPOILERS: The villains are horrific - the Missionaries strike fear into my heart every time I play, and Claudia eating a miscarried god fetus to become god herself? Fucked up on a level you rarely see. I suppose if you didn’t catch it in the last sentence - your protag Heather vomits up a fetal god late in the game. Yes, you read that right. The best thing about this game though? Heather. I could climb up my feminist soapbox and talk about Heather as a subversion to video game tropes all fucking day - she’s a nonsexualized teenage girl whose father is killed for her character development. She’s self-sufficient, tough but still vulnerable, and hard as nails in a fight. As I might have mentioned a time or six, she also voluntarily aborts a god because Fuck Your Plans, She’s Got Her Own.

#4 - Final Fantasy X

Listen. I don’t know how much of this is because of actually enjoying playing the game and how much of it is emotional attachment. As most of you who follow me know, my mother died when I was sixteen. When I was about fourteen, I dated a rich kid who used to bring his PS2 to our very not-rich house and play games for us to watch - the sort of neophyte version of Watching Guys Play Videogames, if you will, which is another rant for another time. He got a Gamecube specifically so I could play RE Zero and Hunter The Reckoning. He was a neckbeard but he was also desperate to keep me from ditching so he did the smart thing and plied my very poor ass with money and food. The #1 game in the watching roster, though, was FFX - and if you know anything about the game, you know how heavily spirituality features into the story. My mother, very caught up in a very Eastern Philosphy Meets Quantum Physics internal seeking about the nature of things, was hooked from the word Go. She used to sit and watch Trey play for hours - we all did, but having her join us and love it that much? Wonderful. Half my memories of this game are both of us crying - crying when Yuna dances to send the souls, crying when Yuna reveals she’s on a suicide mission, crying when she and Tidus fall in love anyway, crying when she sends her Aeons to die in the final fight, crying over ‘the fayts are waking up’, crying when the big reveal about Auron comes up, crying crying crying. My wife bought it in 2011 and I watched her play through it again and while it suffers from the same issue as all FF games - too much filler and weird battle scenarios - it was cathartic. I miss my mom.

#5 - Resident Evil 6

Eat my entire ass. You already knew this was coming. I will defend this game to my grave for the fact that we have complex, interesting narratives surrounding female characters who have actual personalities. Was it perfect? No. Did it take RE out of horror territory and move it more into action? Woefully, yes. Is this series deeply problematic for where it chooses to set down your mostly-white protags and have them kill their way through? Big time. Don’t gloss those facts. But it’s got emotional punch in spades and a few weird character breaks that ended up being kind of brilliant - Chris has been so resiliently relentless in his fight against bioterrorism that a major PTSD break was inevitable. Leon would of course risk life and limb to help Helena, even though she implicated herself in something terrible. The icing on the cake to me was a grown up Sherry Birkin, wide eyed and believing like hell in the fight she thought she was on the right side of and getting knocked down only to get back up. Ada’s entire side campaign was brilliant. I hate some of the control choices they made in this game - the running from the Haos scenes near the end of Chris and Piers’ campaign makes me want to eat my own fist - but so it goes with most RE games (until RE4, moving your protag was like driving a tank). Jake and Sherry are My Unsinkable Ship. There are at least six scenes across this game that never get easier to watch - when the bomb hits the city and the cut scene of the mass infections begin, I still get sick to my stomach - and that, to me, is the mark that this game struck a hell of a chord in terms of storytelling.

This was long.

#noccalula answers #this was fucking long #ask and ye shall receive #vidja games

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the-prince-and-the-thief · 5 years ago

Note

Come at me with the lore, fam, after making my own overly complicated fanfic for almost more than a decade with its own magic system nothing surprises me

//OH BOY YOU’RE IN FOR A TREAT

I’m putting it under a cut to save your dash.

TW: A lot of stuff. Rape, sexual abuse, abortion, murder... just... just prepare for the worst.

//Okay, so, Blazblue AU.

Key characters here are: Kagura Mutsuki, Ragna the Bloodedge, Celica A. Mercury, my OC Riku Akasaka, and of course Ren and Goro.

First off, in the BB world, there is a one-world government police state that’s currently been having a bunch of in-fighting and schisms since... forever. They had a civil war (the good guys in this fight lost 8( ), and Kagura has been trying to fix shit for uh... a long time. He’s got the true heir to the throne (Homura Amanohosaka, I think? Their name is long.)

This is an alternate canon where Kokonoe decided to bring her dead aunt back to life like, 3 games early. So it diverges during Calamity Trigger, or The Only Game I Understood (tm). Celica has this power to absorb seithr, or magic energy that can also kill you. The main villain’s body is kind of MADE of seithr. The main villain, Terumi, had a plan to merge with his host and make himself unkillable by linking his life to Noel Vermillion’s. But because Celica decided to show up and cling to Ragna, plans did not go through, but the time loop didn’t restart. Ragna’s plans are at a standstill as well, and he gets attached to Celica, and... it’s complicated.

To sum up Ragna’s story super quick because it’s side information-- He falls for Celica, they have twins, Ragna realizes that his soul-eating grimoire could kill said kids, gets Jubei to cut it off of him, and they live mostly happily for a while until Celica starts dying of seithr poisoning. Then Terumi decides to finally pay back for having his plans ruined, kills Celica, burns Ragna’s house down AGAIN (you know, for extra trauma), and kidnaps one of his kids. The other had a power like her mother so she didn’t get taken because being near her made Terumi sick. Ragna nearly died in all of this, spent years trying to make a decent life for his daughter, got arrested, and then after basically making prison hell for everyone else with his anger and violence, was basically given a plea deal by Kagura of “Look my dude, get on my side in this government coup I’m doing and we’ll basically give you your daughter back, a job, and a steady income. We cool bro?” Aaaand by the time Akechi is around he’s a parent with 7 kids, 2 who are the same age as Akechi and grew up being his friends.

Kagura is the part where it gets relevant to Akechi. Kagura hears about this scandal with the Fumizuki family (long story short Shido is a Fumizuki in this case because it’s a Duodecim family they haven’t used yet, and it means “month of erudition” so I figured a focus on intelligence above all else would be fitting...) involving a bastard kid whos mom just died. Now the whole family is looking to basically throw this kid as far away from them as possible.

Kagura, at this point, is a walking scandal magnet and has stopped giving a fuck. He married a woman literally nobody in his family liked, started a government coup, gave Ragna the Bloodedge the sweetheart deal of a lifetime and more. His wife is my character Riku, who uh...

Goddamnit, another character break. You see why I said this would take a year and a half? XD Anyway, Riku. Riku is one of the last Japanese people in this setting. Japan got magic nuked in Blazblue, to put it bluntly. A giant world-ending monster decided to appear there first. Japan is *still* not inhabitable centuries later. The Japanese people are very few and far between, and Riku’s family is one of the last families that can boast a 100% Japanese heritage. Y’know. Except for Riku. Because her mom went and married an outsider without her family’s permission. Her mom doesn’t give a single solitary fuck what others think and does what she wants. So she’s actually only half Japanese, and her family treats her and her older brother like shit for it. They’re basically only cared about if they’re “useful”. Her brother went into the military academy to basically gain info for the family (they like to hoarde grimoires as well so the NOL and the Akasaka family kind of hate each other), but he “mysteriously went MIA”. I.e. was violently murdered and had his grimoire stolen. Riku went to the academy after to figure out what happened to her beloved onii-chan. It... did not go well for her. TW sexual abuse- she was raped in her freshman year, ended up pregnant, and when she went home in her third trimester, the head of her family forced her into an abortion that caused serious damage. They cut her hair off and basically sent her back to school traumatized and miserable. And now everyone in school treats her like a whore. She decides fuck it, if they’re gonna treat her like that, she’s going to use being a “whore” to her advantage. She slept her way to status, and, using her own special abilities, gathered a bunch of blackmail on literally everyone in the NOL. Nobody can mess with her, but she also has no one she can rely on.

She was initially trying to use Kagura as well (trying to get put in intelligence so she could ruin the people who made her life hell), but Kagura noticed she didn’t actually seem to enjoy sex. He helped her get surgery to correct the damage done to her (he only convinced her to go along with this by saying it was for his own benefit. She did not trust him. He said basically he wanted to be the first person to make her enjoy sex.) She eventually began to open up to him and trust him when she realized they were very much alike. They both were isolated from their families for not following tradition, both had many enemies, and both genuinely wanted to destroy the government around them and create a better world. She joined him in the whole government coup thing, using her intelligence-gathering skills. They’re newlyweds when Akechi is a kiddo.

Understandably, considering all of this, Riku doesn’t really want kids... the trauma of it all is a bit too raw. So Kagura wasn’t really planning to adopt him? He figured he’d give him temporary housing, then send him off to Ragna. Ragna would gladly adopt the kid after all. But he and Riku found out they were very attached to this sad little kid who didn’t understand why everyone looked down on him. Riku, in particular, could relate to his problems.

So Akechi gets a nice, (mostly) stable family! He meets Ren in middle school. Ren outed a pedo teacher that was very well-liked by most of the students and staff, getting him fired and arrested. So, he was something of an outcast. Akechi, upon hearing this, decides that Ren is a hero. (And Ren p much instantly had a crush on him after that). The two grow up as childhood friends. They’re pretty inseparable. Ren doesn’t really like being at home with his family (they’re very much the type that says nothing to avoid being a target for potential assassination. The NOL has been legit very dangerous their entire lives, after all. So their outspoken, determined child causes them no shortage of headaches), so he’s always hanging out at Akechi’s place.

You can probably guess that, actually knowing Akechi’s life story, Ren *actually* assaulted Shido when he saw the dude trying to assault another woman. He was genuinely enraged and just kinda lost it. >>; Thankfully connections save Ren. Kagura basically goes “Ok so enjoy going to the military academy as a reform school. Also you need someone to keep an eye on you. ....My son can do that.” Really... he just wanted Ren to look out for his son.

See, Akechi in this verse is still very concerned with status? He feels that he owes it to his mother and father to live up to his family name, because they’ve done so much for him. He wants to be accepted by the Duodecim as a whole. Riku and Kagura tried their very best to keep him the hell away from all of that political bullshit, but the kid decided to go into the military anyway. He’s not physically the strongest, and he’s pretty naive and childish, deep down. His parents are pretty damned sure that Goro will be eaten alive if left on his own there. (The military academy is, for the record, it’s own massive city. So they wouldn’t exactly be able to keep an eye on him.) So, Renren gets asked to protect his friend.

They also get chosen by two grimoires while there. These are the Rebel’s Grimoire and the Hero’s Grimoire. Grimoires are basically... to put it bluntly, training wheels for magic. Most people suck at magic by nature. Hell, most people don’t even USE grimoires. They use the even bigger training wheels that are Ars Magus. Grimoires usually specialize in a particular ability. They have their own rules, conditions for use, and often choose their hosts. People fuse with their grimoires over time. If the two become completely synchronized it’s called a Remix Heart. (This is the only important lore information from Remix Heart btw, I saved you from reading a crappy fanservice manga, you’re welcome.)

The Hero’s Grimoire picks a host with a strong sense of justice. The Rebel’s Grimoire picks a host with a very rebellious spirit. The catch is, they always pick their hosts at the same time, and the hosts are always very connected souls, two sides of the same coin. The Rebel’s grimoire also likes to do this *wonderful* thing where it latches on your face and only accepts you if you rip it off. If you don’t, it kills you! Fun times. Goro turned around to look at Ren when this happened, and the Hero’s Grimoire embedded itself into his spine. (Ren’s looks like a pair of glasses when not in use, Akechi’s looks like a crow tattoo with a weird growth between his shoulder blades.)

The two grimoires are sentient and talk to their owners while giving them similar but contrasting powers. Ren can use his Third Eye ability from the games, destroy barriers, teleport through shadows, and has very little presence-- almost nobody notices him around unless he’s pointed out or makes himself known. Goro has the same third eye ability, can create barriers/obstructions, can obscure his movements in bright light (either dazzling people or simply teleporting in light), and has a glamour that attracts others to him. (Ren uses this to basically cling to Akechi at all times while nobody notices him. He loves it. Akechi hates it, because PLEASE STOP HITTING ON ME I HAVE A BOYFRIEND HE’S RIGHT. HERE. )

The phantom thieves also still exist in this AU! They have a different MO but similar intents and goals. Basically, they steal back what the NOL has taken from others. Or, if said thing can’t be replaced (like, say, innocence, trust, etc) then they’ll take what they consider a karmic equivalent (status, power, etc). It actually all started because Ren wanted to get Riku’s grimoire back (Akechi was still vERY upset that the government had it, how dare they do that to his family). So Akechi is on the team from the beginning. Whether he wants to be or not.

There’s a lot more but this is just the basics... @_@ I told ya it was a lot.

#ooc #honestly i'm scratching the surface here #Masked Shadow

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oddsnendsfanfics · 7 years ago

Text

Two Strangers : Take You Home

Genre: Fan Fiction (Vikings) Pairing: Ivar/Reader Warnings: N/A Rating: G Length: Drabble Disclaimer: a strict work of fiction, I own nothing except the original characters and the plot line. In no way am I affiliated to any of it.

A/N: More Modern!Ivar kudos to whoever made this gif, btw

Two Strangers Master List

The air was chilly, as you sat down outside the small cafe, snuggling your scarf and thick jacket tighter around you. The overcast morning gave promise to a snowy afternoon, you were sure of it, which was why you were so confused about the desire that Ivar had to be outside.

Carefully, as always, lining his knees up to the chair behind him; Ivar gently lowered his body into the seating position discarding his crutches to lean on the table beside him. The black hat he wore covered his shaggy locks and brimmed those fantastic blue eyes that you adored so much. Licking his lips in the cold, he shivered a little, and rubbed his gloved hands together.

"I'm sorry," He spoke, as if reading you mind, he continued. "I don't get the chance to be outside, much, once the snow comes. It's nice to get the fresh air, while I can."

"It's fine, Ivar." You smile sweetly, reaching for your latte, shocked that it hasn't turned cold sitting on the table. "I don't mind, really."

Arching his brow, Ivar smirked, "Really? Because you look like you're freezing? We can go in, if you want." He nodded his head toward the brick building that sat behind him. Inside was warm, inside was also crowded with bodies, and other obstacles that could be hell on Ivar.

As you had learned in Paris, people weren't always so willing to accommodate the man whose legs didn't work. Fools, you thought to yourself holding your latte to your lips.

"If I freeze now, it is an excuse to warm up later." You winked at him. A deep blush crept into Ivar's cheeks, trying to avoid the embarrassment he tucked his chin into his jacket.

Warming up at his and Ubbe's place would be a hell of a lot different than how the two of you had warmed up last night, in your hotel.

"When we get back, my brothers will likely be there." He spoke softly, his cheeks less flushed. Picking up his cup of coffee – no sugar with a small splash of milk – Ivar took a long drink.

You had yet to meet all of his brothers, so far he had only been comfortable introducing you to Ubbe. Something about the introduction had felt right to Ivar, leading to the introduction last evening before you and Ivar had gone out to dinner and drinks.

This morning, on his way to meet you, Ivar had even heard Ubbe talking about the two of you. His older brother was talking to Sigurd, saying how great of a match you seemed to be, if this was in fact a romantic relationship, and that he was happy Ivar had finally gotten out and found someone. The conversation had seized when Ivar thumped into the kitchen, acting as though he was oblivious to the moment.

"Hmm," You hummed, blowing hot air between your gloved hands, "So, I finally get to meet the rest of the infamous Lothbrok family?"

If they were as welcoming and friendly as their Uncle Rollo, how difficult could this meeting be? While hanging out in Paris, Ivar had asked you to attend an art gallery opening with him, as it was being put on by his Uncle's wife. Accepting the invite, you had spent the evening feeling severely under dressed and way too poor to be among those at the opening. Ivar had made you feel at ease, making silly comments, and little digs at various points in the night. His Uncle had welcomed you happily, explaining that this was his wife's scene and fully understood any feelings of awkwardness.

"I don't expect Bjorn to be there, but you will get you meet Sigurd and Hvitserk." Ivar informed you, his eyes clouding and his brow sharpening into a tight furrow. "Are you sure that you're okay to sit outside?"

"I'm fine, really. So," You leaned forward in the metal chair, "tell me more about your brothers. Any quirks or details that I need before hand?"

Ivar had told you a lot of things about his brothers, but nothing on a personal level of detail.

Biting his bottom lip, out of habit, Ivar wrinkled his nose a brief second before he spoke. "Hvitserk will no doubt try to hit on you, ignore him. He's perpetually horny." You laughed at the way Ivar rolled his eyes with his words. "Sigurd and I are very close in age, we sometimes get into arguments without realizing it. If that happens, don't worry because Ubbe knows when and how to break us up."

"Unlucky for Hvitserk, I have a great act for deflecting advances and flirting." You chuckle, biting your own bottom lip. Ivar had mentioned that he and Sigurd would bicker on occasion, their worst fight being Ivar's senior year in high school, when he lost his virginity to Sigurd's girlfriend – to prove a point to his brother, of course. "And Bjorn? If he is around, what is he like?"

"He comes off as being a hard ass, but he's a good guy. He's quiet and observant, my uncle says that he is a lot like my dad." Ivar shrugged at the thought. "My mom always said that I am like my dad, as well. So, I don't really know. Bjorn is nice, although I think he is 100% done with our bullshit." He laughed.

You remembered Ivar mentioning his eldest brother's constant absence, as Bjorn had a wife and two, maybe three, children.

You smiled, trying to find something to add, or a joke to make but came up short. Knowing how Ivar had also lost his mother, someone who he had been very close to, maybe a joke wasn't fit for this part of conversation.

A chill ran through you, shaking your body, as the wind picked up. The clouds were growing darker and your watch told you that morning had now turned into the afternoon. You'd been with Ivar for a good three hours and had no plans of parting ways just yet. Unless he wished to take some alone time until you were scheduled to have dinner at his and Ubbe's place.

Tipping the rest of your latte into your mouth, the sweetness came as a comfort. "Do you have plans for lunch?"

Ivar shook his head, finishing his coffee and aiming the cup at a nearby trash can. Effortlessly he tossed the cup, landing it in the bin. "And he scores!" he raised his arms in mock victory. "Ivar Lothbrok, ten points."

Clapping caused a jolt in your numb fingers, but didn't stop you from smiling and cheering wildly.

"Thank you, thank you." Ivar placed his hand on his chest bending at the waist, taking a bow. Shifting to get comfortable, he replaced his focus on your previous question. "I do not have plans for lunch, however, if you would like to make some I am more than happy to agree."

Adjusting your scarf, you sighed gently. Not wanting to be too forward in your next decision. "Would there be a place around, where we could grab a quick bite? Or did you want to head home?"

In the time that you had known Ivar, you'd learned that there were days when pain would rack his body, draining everything from him if he didn't take the proper rest breaks. On a good day, he could go forever it seemed. On others, he had admitted to you that getting out of bed was a struggle. This morning had been busy, Ivar showed you around his home city, on top of the two nights you'd gone out previously.

If he wanted to go home, you wouldn't mind heading for your hotel, or navigating your way around until you had to meet for dinner.

Reaching for his crutches, Ivar carefully placed his arms into the cradles, gripping the hand helds readying himself to stand. "I know of a great place for lunch, if you want to go? If you had other plans..."

"My only plans today were to hang out with you, then have dinner," You paused and smiled, "Also with you."

"Well," Ivar grunted hauling himself up to stand. You followed suit, standing as well. "Then let's make it a full day." He took a step away from the table and paused, holding out an arm to you. "Coming?"

"Are you sure?" Cautiously, you laid a hand on his bicep knowing that if you held there then he could still manage his crutches. "If you're tired or need a break, then I don't mind."

"Fuck it," Ivar rolled his eyes and giggled, "You're beginning to sound like Ubbe. Not a turn on, by the way."

Kissing Ivar's cheek, you can't help but grinning like a fool, slowly moving down the side walk with your hand still clasped to his arm. You had no idea where he was taking you, nor did you care. Ivar chatted idly about this place and that, nodding to one or two random people, a dumb smile plastered to his face.

He'd asked you to come visit and was convinced that you'd decline, much to his surprise and yours, making the trip was a no brainer. Six months of knowing one another, racking up phone bills, and endless FaceTime conversations the idea that he wanted you here was overwhelming and heart warming.

"Hey, are you even listening to me?" Ivar chuckled, nudging you and stopping short. You glance at him, his eyes mischievous under the wide brim of his hat.

"Of course," You half lied. You had been listening, his voice soft and enjoyable, but the words had faded together and you'd caught none of them.

"So, you're okay with shaving your head and letting Sigurd sacrifice you?" Ivar nodded, his lips turned into a pensive frown. "Good to know, we can work on signing the paper work tonight."

"Okay, you caught me." You took the teasing with good nature. "What was the question? The real question?"

"I asked," Ivar repeated, "How would you like going back to my place, I'll make us lunch and we can hang out until dinner?"

"Hmm," You lift your chin and drop it in a slow, half nod. "Are you sure? I don't want your brother feeling like I am overstaying."

"Ubbe is at work," Ivar informed you, biting his bottom lip, his eyes shifting past you nervously. "And you'll be fine, Ubbe likes you. Hvitserk and Sigurd will, too."

"You're sure?" Your nose wrinkled in a sniffle from the cold. "I don't want to impose and have them hate me."

"They won't hate you, if anything they're going to love you." Ivar's lips turned into a shy smile, before he leaned in for the most innocent kiss. "Because I do."

@pathybo , @imgoldielikehawn , @sparklemichele , @titty-teetee , @kirah34 , @kduran04 , @pagan-raider , @alex-ivar-minx , @hoeghfabulous

#two strangers #take you home #ivar imagine #ivar the boneless imagine #modern ivar #ivar the boneless #ivar ragnarsson #vikings imagine #au #ivar/reader #alex hogh imagine #Alex Høgh Andersen fanfiction #Alex Høgh Andersen #alex hogh andersen #fluffy #drabble

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team-adults-blog · 8 years ago

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4.08-4.13

Hi friends. I haven’t written since Ep 4.07. And then I didn’t want to write them all individually, so here are the highlights of the season, broken down by character. I waited until after the finale to see if any of my issues would be resolved. Would not recommend reading in one sitting. Below is 6,750+ words (10 pages single spaced in word) and some tangents. Please don’t read it in one sitting, I’m sure you have better things to do.

Warning: A higher emotion to jokes ratio.

This gets pretty critical. I loved the first half of the season, but the second half was hit and miss.

Octavia (? /+)

Wowwieee what an arc. Wasn’t sure exactly where she was going the whole time, but I generally enjoyed the ride.

Kane’s body guard. Fight with Dad!Kane. Pushed off a cliff. Ilian. Still have mixed feelings about Ilian. INDRA LOVE.

I’m happy she got to talk to Bellamy in the finale, but of course, after trying and failing to tell each other they loved one another all season, the radio cuts out, preventing it again. Typical. It still hurt. But then it hurts that much more after when Clarke doesn’t get to talk to Abby.

I like the reluctant leadership role Octavia finds herself in a lot. She acknowledges she’s not a natural leader like her brother or Clarke, but she’s being pushed to lead anyway. Indra’s council that all leaders have help/ a team is so so so so so so so so important for O to realize. She’s not entitled or arrogant like Jaha. She’s strong and humble and it will make her a great leader. I’m also glad she’s like a queen or emperor or whatever and not heda or commander. It’s a new dawn. It’s a new day. It’s a new life. And they’re feeling [claustrophobic.]

And this old world is a new world and a bold world for me- would have been another appropriate lyric to throw out, but it lacks a joke and is not as obvious a reference. Same song btw.

Indra (+)

Indra had a fantastic season. I loved the depth her character got and like whoa! Daughter! Lets go back and rewatch S1-3 with this knowledge as we look at how she interacts with Octavia. I need to talk about 4.10’s conclave because holy bajobie. Such good acting. Much emotion. Give Adina Porter a series regular role. Why the hell did they make Roan a series regular when he just died. SHE DESERVES MORE. SHE IS INCREDIBLE. Ok so. We got Indra rebuilding a relationship with her estranged daughter, who have different ideas of faith and leadership. We get serious Octavia mentorship. Her conversation with Kane when he’s telling her that if Octavia makes it out of the conclave it’ll all be because of her and he’s thankful and also like I miss you, we were friends. And She’s like… you can have multiple mentors that teach you different things. And also I hope she’s ok too. We can try and be friends again. Then boom. Guess who ruins it? Fricking Thelonious Jaha. Kindra better have rebuilt in that time gap. I need them to be friends again. Plus they’re both really important influences and mentors to Octavia so they WILL interact, even if they’re disagreeing. I’d like to see that too. Show me the friendship rebuild. I need it.

Gaia (+)

From the first moment she was on screen I said, I don’t know her, but I love her. And then I found out she’s Indras BLOOD daughter. Not adopted. BLOOD. Her face is so expressive. I would love to see where S5 takes her. She’s obvs in the bunker, right?

Ilian (eh)

A generally nice boy. He took Octavia home to meet the parents…that was a poor joke, but not bad enough that I feel the need to remove it. I can feel cringes already. He helped O out of some bad situations and helped her grow. I wasn’t a fan of the cave sex, but I think I get where it came from. I still have no idea how he blew up the Ark without being stopped. He was a decent one season character. OH. It was nice in his first ep that we got to see the destruction A.L.I.E. caused on a more personal level for the grounders. While Ilian’s story can’t represent the experience of all grounders who became chipped, it does a good job of letting the viewer see the devastation she caused. By feeling sorrow for this grounder family, you can imagine that multiplied across all the clans and boom. Lots of sadness all over the coalition.

Echo (+)

She may have done some pretty messed up things but I’m still loving her. I loved her when she and Bellamy met. I was thinking, “wow we get another badass warrior woman. This show is great.” Then she helped blow up Mount Weather and I was all. “I don’t know if I can still love her… I still want to and sort of do, but I don’t know if I should.” She made sure Bellamy wasn’t inside though, you’ve got to give her credit for that. AND THEN. She wants to be buds with Bell and he’s all like. You’re a frickin spy and you killed my girlfriend. I can never trust you. And her face falls and I’m like oh, Echooooo. Someday you’ll be buds or more. In the conclave she’s a sneaky little cheater which I want to be mad at, but it was so smart and she was just trying to save her King. Her face falls AGAIN and you get where she’s coming from. She’s exhiled. King ded. Riding in to save Bell/ sneakily following him to try and find safety. One cool grounder. I really like her. I’m glad she made it into space because that will be really cool for future plotlines/ flashbacks while she’s learning how everything works.

Roan (eh)

Everything he does makes sense for his character. Most of the conflict in the 4A storyline comes from a lack of/poor communication between him and skaikru. Banishing Echo was just, but you died 5 min later and without her Azgeda literally has no clear leader. He was p cool but not my fave. They could have explored his backstory a lot more and gone in some interesting directions had they chosen to.

Clarke (?)

-a little confused?

-I get her plans fall through at every turn

-bellamy? You’re worth something to me. She saves bellamy in the rover/ tank scene. Then at some point Jaha’s influence becomes more important. Jaha potential mentorship made for interesting parallels, and made me actually a little interested in Jaha. But then he screws her over with the bunker.

She shoots at Bellamy?!?!?! But only a warning shot. And then 30 min later she’s forgiven? Man he must really love you.

Finale: wow lots of emotional Bellarke. Wowieeee. Ofc Clarke goes to the tower. Ofc she lives. But. How? How much food was left in the lab? Assuming they actually left enough for Raven, was it 5 years’ worth? How did the bunker get buried in rubble and ash (I know it was in the temple) but Becca’s lab stay perfectly fine AND sealed? It survived the first time, and has medical equipment so Clarke could treat her radiation poisoning. HOWEVER. She should have had some scars 6 years and 7 days later. What is Clarke dying her hair with? It’s really cute that she talked to Bellamy all that time to stay sane. He gave her hope. That’s really nice.

With some kid named Maddie (spelling?) now. How’d that happen? And she’s a nightblood? I’m sure this will all be explained to me so I’m not going to spiral here.

Bellamy (+)

What a great season for Bellamy. He gets emotional fixing from S3, emotional development with his sister and Kane and Clarke. He was an absolute hero in the finale. That was prime Bellamy. Holy cow was that his episode. Sure Clarke was doing things too but. Wow. He talked to Octavia, sad. He comforted Raven. He comforted Echo. He was on fiaahhh. Very happy with his season. We need a new name for this season- Bellamarie or Bernie or something that shows his growth.

Murphy & Emori (+)

Good teamwork. Glad Murphy is happy with his gal. Glad they’re both alive and in space. He’ll be the fun conflict/ complaining guy up on the Ark but still do what needs to get done. Emori is going to learn to trust these 6 other people and then no one else. I’m here for it.

Nate Miller (+)

He got rid of that trash that is Bryan. Bryan bugged Miller’s jacket in S3 or did y’all forget? Bryan wanted to let everyone die on the trip to Azgheda. Nate deserves better. He GOT better. Jackson is pure and morally right most of the time and is just way way better.

David Miller (+)

So he gave into the masses and shocked Kane. He understands mob power and mentality, but I thought they were buds. It hurt a little, but I see why he did it.

Father son guard duty was awesome.

Sacrificing for Nate was heart wrenching. I want more of the Millers.

I became strangely attached to his character after he interrupted Kabby’s reoccurring eye sex back at the start of S3. Also if you read about the casting of the millers it will break your heart even more. (link) this was all I could find in a 2 min search, but they’re really tight and it’s lovely.

Raven (+)

-so so so happy Sinclair came back in 4.11. I love him. So so much. We deserved more of him. When I saw Allesandro Juliani’s name on the opening guest credits (and not having watched any promos) I was so excited. Guys. He had a wife that I never got to meet. Will we ever get to meet her??? Abby’s already adopted Raven but you can never have too many adopted parents. I adopt them all the time. You don’t have to tell them. It’s fine. They need a good kid like me to look after. I’m cry if I keep thinking about Cindy, who was too young to actually be my mom, but was my high school mom all the same. But cooler. And with fun verb songs. Kay now I’m cryin about my Spanish teacher brb y’all. (I actually was for the record)

Ok. Back to Sinclair and Raven. Everything was beautiful. He validated her for her, not just for her super mind. That love and support was just so lovely because raven only sees herself as valuable if she can contribute with her brain. The tank scene where they touched the glass? I know that’s also common for love and hope in prison glass/grate scenes but like. Ian directed this ep. It was not a coincidence. Not at ALLLLLLLLLL. Especially with DNR written on Jasper’s hand held up to the glass. And we know Kane trying to open the bunker was a deliberate call-back to the hatch because the writers tweeted it. At this time I would like to thank Bailey and Peter for telling me I would like Lost so that I may make these connections. The ep was great because of all the emotionnnnn (4.11). Sinclair deserved better.

her surprise at the delinquents returning/ Bellamy hugging her is another emotional stab at my heart.

Raven Reyes is one bamf and I love her with all of my heart. I’m so happy she got to spacewalk, and it was really sweet Clarke figured out why she was happy about that.

Jackson (+)

Oh my gosh Jackson got a first name and a boyfriend this season and I’m so happy for him! Honestly, he delivers a lot of “the viewer needs to know this so we’ll give the lines to Jackson as him talking to Abby,” so it was really nice to see him get some development. Jackson, Nyko, and David Miller were characters that I was happy to see getting lines and screen time. Now all I have is Jackson. I’m considering getting attached to Costa but he just stands there so. Maybe not.

Nyko (-)

Nyko sacrificing himself for Luna was ok when it was for the greater good and all that, but with how Luna’s story ended up being, I wish he’d just lived. It wouldn’t have been as meaningful if someone else had died, but she doesn’t do anything that makes him dying for her worth it. It just makes me sad.

Luna (-)

I understand Luna’s resentment of being used for her nightblood. However, I don’t completely follow her path to wanting everyone to die. All of her people died, so there’s pain there, but Luna was supposed to have turned her back on violence, despite being good at it. The shift from I am reluctantly helping you (when Raven convinces her and Nyko dies) to I hate this one group of people so much I have now changed my perspective on the human race that they are all terrible and need to die. If I have to spend significant time retracing Luna’s story in my mind to try and figure out how she got to this point, the writers aren’t doing their job in tying episodes together and making her arc progress logically. I’m a nerd. I’m willing to take the time and try and figure it out. But really? Luna could have entered the conclave with the idea to share the bunker, which would have made sense to me? But then Octavia wouldn’t be able to have that growth. So. I don’t really know. Generally disappointed.

I will say, I love a good parallel or call back. When Ariana (that kid who came to Arkadia with Luna and Nyko back when Flokru died) was dying, she said something like “from the water we are born to the water we return.” When she said it again as she drowns Roan it was so cool. I’m sorry for Roan and all, but it was a cool variation of yu gonplei ste odon which all the other grounders seemingly say. I find both expressions pleasing because of the ability to shift their meaning based on tone and context. Mercy and comfort vs basically die bitch. Love it.

Kabby (+++, End--)

Kabby, as a unit, because these characters are more than their relationship. Holy cow. 4.01: we see guilt and forgiveness and love and a face caress in front of Clarke, who we see is cool with it, but also a little sad. 4.02: SEX BA-BEEE. Jake’s rings. Heart eyes. Then Abby takes the rings off- off camera. Which is not super cool because we didn’t get to see her make that decision, but they just had sex and I will pick my battles. Hug. Abby returns to go where she can be useful. I LIKED THIS because it recognized they are individuals with different skill sets and allows them to have plotlines and conflicts of their own. Abby is not just hanging around Polis and all those grounder strangers and popping onscreen to be Marcus’ girlfriend lady. I respect the separation. I HATED THIS because it separated them. Which meant less kabby scenes because they were not in the same physical location. The walkie scenes warmed my heart. That was beautiful. BUT THEN. They were apart. For ten episodes. Ten. There were thirteen total episodes in the season. They were together for three. I know Clarke’s story is the A plot darling and more important and I accept that. But her narrative and decision making process was all over the place this season and I do NOT accept that I was denied a reunion scene after Kane and Abby were apart for ten. Episodes. And then completely left out of the finale. It’s disrespectful and rude. To the characters and their storylines, which now have unanswered questions (to follow below) and a 6 year time gap. We’d better get some fucking flashbacks or something because last time there was only a THREE MONTH time gap and the emotional consequences of Mount Weather was mishandled or brushed off until Bellamy had to get a redo to fix the shitshow that was his S3 this past season. I have concerns.

Abby (started off +, end of season MAJOR--)

Kabby amazingness at the beginning and then Abby getting her own plotlines was super satisfying. I had some issues with Abby and medical ethics, but SO DID SHE! Those are hard questions to grapple with and I’m not mad at her for anything she did there. She got talked into a lot of the questionable things she did- which is good in that I can defend her to these assholes, but not good in that she was able to be talked into a morally grey decision. Abby and Raven were great. As they always have. Even when they fight and I have to explain the fight and why it’s ok to someone who will continue to say, “Whatever. I still hate Abby.” You’re entitled to your opinion, but it’s wrong. Kids these days don’t want to empathize with the adult and try to see things from their perspective. Ofc Abby doesn’t want Clarke putting herself in danger. She’s her MOM. Ofc kids identify with Clarke. But take a sec and try to understand where the other person is coming from too. Abby and your own parental unit. Sympathy and empathy are important. I don’t want anymore “oh I didn’t think of it that way.” Once you’ve considered Abby’s side of conflict, and you decide you still don’t like her (and not just to make me mad), that’s totally fine. You can feel that way, Z.

Didn’t like that Clarke and Abby were in the same room and not talking to each other? Yeah, idk.

Freeing Bellamy was awesome.

Not telling Kane about being sick- I have conflicting opinions. On one side, she’s sick and doesn’t think she can do anything about it, so don’t worry Kane until you’re together. They haven’t really had alone time since they reopened the bunker, so are we surprised she didn’t tell Kane yet? Not really. Then there’s the “don’t worry anyone at all by keeping it a complete secret” method. By keeping it a secret, you don’t have to face it full on. Your loved ones don’t know, so they don’t treat you any differently. I don’t know if this is super common or just in my head, but with cancer, it’s not uncommon for parents not to tell their kids that they’ve been diagnosed until they’re in later stages and showing symptoms? Alternatively, if their relationship is as solid as it is in my heart, there’s no real reason to keep her illness from Kane. He’s hurt, but aside from her own fear and denial, there’s no real reason for omission.

UNLESS. She’s not sick. Hear me out- Raven is having multiple seizures each day, and Abby began having hallucinations around roughly the same time. So if the illness was affecting them the same way, she ought to be symptomatic. Unless she’s not? It could be affecting her differently. But there were other people in the lab who know about Abby, and I have faith in Jackson that he can be subtle, but how did he avoid spilling the beans in front of Kane before Raven? Abby is his fam and you know he’s gonna be checking up on her even if he does have a super cute new relationship. So that means Abby isn’t progressing with her illness at the same speed Raven is, which is plausible, but she apparently hasn’t had a seizure or any other issue since the one hallucination. So I’m feeling the Clarke with radiation was a dream. BUT Jackson did a scan back in the lab, which is how we know she’s sick, so how do we explain that away? Why even bring up the fact that Abby is still sick and that Kane didn’t know, just to LEAVE THEM BOTH OUT OF THE FINALE AND NEVER ADDRESS THE UNANSWERED QUESTIONS OF: 1) how will Abby get better? 2) how will Kane and Abby deal with the fallout of a secret?

We don’t know. We time jumped 6 years and 7 days and don’t know. Flashbacks are the only solution.

Deciding to die? Let’s tear that apart. It happened right after David Miller wrote Nate’s name down, sacrificing himself. Abby’s feeling hella guilty, but I blame Jaha for making her feel like shit. Abby is the most hopeful, stubborn character on the show, and it felt a little out of character for her to decide she wanted to die, straight out. Not sacrifice herself for someone else. If the sickness and the guilt are supposed to be the motivators I’m still not convinced Abby wanted to die. Maybe just me. This scene was awesome for Kane, great writing, but Abby was just there for him to be a great character off of? A little confused.

Kane (++/eh)

I would like to start calling him Marcus at this point but I think that would make everyone uncomfortable?

Sillyness first: SHIRTLESS TWICEEEEEEEE. Ok done. Kane could not catch a freakin break. Abby leaves, which sucks but it’ll be ok. Then his daughter starts causing trouble and he has to ground her, but she dies on the way and he’s thrown in jail with his son. But they find out she’s ok. A little awk talk with stepdaughter Clarke (pre-clack phase) is a momentarily nice, but then no one wants to listen to him and he’s right about everything, but what use is that when no one will follow you? What’s a being to a mob? Jaha ruins everything (again) right when he had helped get Octavia back on track. He’d just started to fix things with his bff Indra too. Everything comes crashing down.

Like Jackson, Kane said things that were advicy but in character, but that maybe weren’t always merited? I don’t know how to explain it, but there were times when it felt like the show was going HEY. MORALS. HEY. THIS IS IMPORTANT. But Kane’s saying it so it’s THEME important instead of the viewers need these deets, Jackson tell ‘em, son. After the diplomat stuff early on, I’m not really sure what Kane as supposed to be doing? He was just sort of there in a leadership role, saying these wise things. Which he did beautifully, I might add. But he didn’t have a clear story going with all the worry and distress he went through. Unless that in itself was the point? Looping back to the issue of being right vs being an effective leader- if Kane and Jaha were being presented in that light I get it but there ought to have been more?

Dad!Kane was fantastic. Lots of hugs. I’m happy with this side of his character. Beautiful and emotional acting. Ian is my fave forever.

Jaha (-)

How dare you bring up Jake. It’s NOT the same situation. And Clarke? Was? Standing? Right? There? Rude. Abby told Jaha about Jake thinking she was talking to a friend. She ain’t yo friend no mo. She thinks you’re an insane but charismatic leader. Marcus was a good man. Damn right! I was screaming HE STILL IS SHE’S GONNA SAVE HIM! And then Abby gets to say the predictable and extremely exciting He still is. And then stab him. Justice. The entire world cheered. She should have stuck him with something more lethal, but that’s not who Abby Griffin is, and I respect that.

Jaha is a dick and I hope he died in the S4/S5 time gap. But I would also like to see his death. Is that too harsh? Ok so. Jaha as Clarke’s leader was interesting when I thought he was relating to her, and I was on board to explore where that would go. We know they would have had a past relationship on the Ark, and an actual personal one because of Wells at that. But all he wasn’t a positive guiding figure for her. He made her hate herself. He made Abby hate herself. He made Kane hate himself. But get this: He made them hate themselves by putting the blame for HIS OWN IDEAS AND ACTIONS ONTO THEM. He has no soul. He takes zero responsibility for what he did on the Ark, or Allie, moving into the bunker or like. Suggesting the lottery system. He says it, even if he didn’t think it was a good idea, at the Clarke and list incident in Arkadia. He RESUGGESTS it in the bunker in 4.12, only to go “Marcus, this is a shit idea, we can’t do that. They’re already about to riot. How can you make them stop?” Thelonious frickin Jaha. This was your idea. You moved these people into the bunker. YOU are the reason they are comfortable and just got used to the idea of surviving and now it’s being taken away. Marcus Kane had NOTHING to do with that. Don’t you put that evil on [his soul], Ricky Bobby. And you also TOLD the dude with the kid to fight against the grounders- which would get EVERYONE kicked out of the bunker if they lost (which ofc they would) according to Octavia’s rules. Everything that’s going wrong right now is your fault.

I have some serious issues with his wardrobe. The monk hood was a little silly, but I preferred that to the forever 21 boob shirt he was rocking for the second half of the season. If you’re going to wear a chesty shirt, go on and show some cleavage, Jaha. Don’t wear a shirt under it. They should have just left him in the normal zip up from 4.01. He looked normal. It was nice.

We loved to hate him, but now that he’s making everyone feel bad about themselves, good riddance. Be gone foul demon.

How the show talks about/writes/deals with death

Killing main characters is good for keeping viewers on the edge of their seat with the knowledge that no one is safe. With warring factions, plague, and radiation, we’d be fools to think that any character (aside from Clarke, probably) is completely safe. Grey’s Anatomy has killed-off a huge number of their cast when actors decide to leave the show, so I’m super used to the concept and also super worried all the time. SPOILER: I was so worried they were going to kill Stephanie instead of writing her off the show, but they didn’t. Her exit was strong and hopeful and I’m v. emo about it. However, Shonda Rhimes and the Grey’s writers, at least I hope and think, have learned that killing characters for dramatic effect and because you’re running out of plot ideas, so let’s just kill someone is poor writing. Thus the last few main and secondary characters to leave the show have been write-offs instead of kills. It’s more fulfilling. Still, in the setting of the 100, it makes more sense for characters to die than to disappear into the background. Yet when killing characters, writers have to be careful about the message they’re sending.

Lexa and Lincoln both had deaths that upset the fandom because of the real-world context fans are living in. The show got a lot of backlash for the killings and gay-baiting with Lexa appearing in the finale. Plot wise, Lexa was badass and really interesting as a character past the love relationship with Clarke; her relationships with Indra and Kane, and her role as commander and a peace broker were much more interesting to me. However, her character development was inconsistent- she died fighting for peace and “blood must not have blood” which, come on, they could have come up with a new catchy slogan, but then pops up in the C.o.L. all slashy and war-time-killing-machine-Lexa. Lincoln’s fall-out was because the show was killing another P.o.C. when white characters had been in near-death situations and survived.

Because of the blacklash, the show brought up the two again, giving them some respect and saying that their deaths still affect the characters. BUT. I liked that they did this, more-so with Lincoln because it felt so important for Octavia’s character development, saying “look where you’re headed, is this who you want to be? This isn’t who Lincoln would want you to be.” Which worked well, provided the characters saying those lines to her actually knew him at least a little. Abby talking to Clarke about Lexa was perfect and sufficient for her respects because it shows Abby accepting her daughter as Bi and Clarke’s pain over lost love.I don’t really get how Niylah and Lexa would have met, but Clarke being able to talk to her about Lexa was good, I just wish Niylah did something outside of that “support Clarke” role for most of her scenes.

BUT. Maybe I’m cynical in thinking that the only reason Lexa and Lincoln are brought back up is because of the backlash, but other characters have been completely forgotten. Pike is mentioned a bit, but no one got super attached to him over his villain-arc and redemption episode that came too late in the season to gain him much sympathy. Monty’s mom, on the other hand, would have played significantly into Monty’s character development, but is never mentioned (?) Monty tells Clarke that she’s not the only messed up one, which is sort of him saying that he’s going through grief of killing his mom. Twice. But he’s apparently fine other than the one fight he has with Clarke over the List™, which was actually more about his part in Mount Weather than his mother. Hannah Green has not been mentioned since her death.

Which leads me to serious concerns about how Jasper’s death has been and will be handled…

Jasper (major -)

So this is where shit’s gonna get real for a few minutes. This plotline hurt me. The whole season I was thinking, “I hope Jasper doesn’t die like this. I’m ok with him dying, but not like this.” I didn’t want Jasper to commit suicide. His narrative has gone from goofball to grief to depression and if you’re telling me the only end to depression is suicide- on one of my favorite shows- I have a problem with that. I have an even bigger problem with Jasper being semi-responsible for a mass suicide pact.

I don’t think showing serious topics such as suicide is wrong; a show representing real emotional and mental thought processes is good. But they cannot drop the ball and not face the real world consequences of showing that story in a way that doesn’t deal with Jasper’s story after he’s dead. His story isn’t over just because he’s not on screen, and that’s an important message the writers need to show. I need to see how fucked up Jasper’s death leaves Monty. My point is, it’s important to see how killing yourself doesn’t end the pain. Let Monty be mad. Let him be hurt. Let him be upset. But show us it. Don’t tell me that he went through his grief process in space and is now A-ok. We need to see it. Otherwise. Jasper’s death has no emotional consequences- like Fox or Monroe, except that he was a main character and needs to have consequences.

This season was so dark. If Jasper’s death doesn’t come back in the emotional ways Lincoln and Lexa’s were, and instead is relatively forgotten like Hannah Green, showing that storyline was irresponsible. Don’t make people hurt just for the dramatic effect of it and then treat that hurt like its meaningless.

Harper (-)

If Harper is meant to be the opposite of Jasper in that she decided to live, and is the “hope” character, or the character that came close and then realized not wanting to live is different from wanting to die, I see what the writers were going for, but they failed. Here’s why: Harper has only functioned as a love interest for most of the season. In S3 she was working for Kane with Nate Miller and it was awesome. S4 has her going down a dark path, which it perfectly believable any one of her plotlines from the start could turn someone dark: crash-landing as a delinquent, being drilled in Mt. Weather, being around for all the darkness of S3 plot, and leaving the guy to be trampled. So I understand how she got here, I just don’t like that we’ve only seen it through her interactions with Monty. Let her be a person outside of the relationship too. So my issue with Harper is more of a Monty issue. We don’t get to see Harper making the decision not to drink the tea. We see her say “I love you” back to Monty, which as its own story independent of everything else happening would be fine. She realized she wanted to live. Good. However, when she said it wasn’t the right time on Monty’s side. His best friend just killed himself in front of him. He’s afraid his girlfriend has killed herself too, which would amplify the pain he’s already experiencing. Harper’s fine on her own, but when I compare her to Jasper (as I’m thinking I should) I hate her storyline because it didn’t fully get to the level it needed to. Monty tried much harder to be there for Harper, which could happen, but it pisses me off because Jasper is his best friend and you don’t abandon that just because you’ve got a girlfriend.

Monty (-)

Sometimes it’s hard to be sympathetic when you can’t empathize at all in the situation. Monty cannot imagine what Harper/Jasper’s going through, and that’s hard on both of them. It’s frustrating not to understand. I’ve been Monty, hating someone for “not trying hard enough” when they were just doing their best to stay alive. I’ve been Jasper too. It sucks to know you’re a mess, but you can’t explain it to make someone who hasn’t been where you are to understand. It’s frustrating to see how you’re affecting people you care about, but you can’t stop being the way you are.

We didn’t get to see Monty deal with the death of his mother. We need to see how he deals with Jasper’s death. Or if they decide not to flashback in S5, we need to see that the death of his best friend has changed him. I’m worried that the show will glaze over it or say Monty’s ok because he had Harper to help him get through it. Jasper’s death has to have real consequences for Monty so that we see how suicide affects the ones you leave behind for both Monty’s development and to make Jasper’s death mean something on the show. He could have died in the black rain if they didn’t want to carry the emotional weight of suicide and upset viewers and they should have thought that through.

Why I’m glad Bryan was written off instead of killed (+)

The whole gay-killing would have been worse after Lexa, even though I predicted his death. Good on them for writing him off. Bryan and Miller had important, basal, essential differences. The show demonstrated how you can love someone, but can’t be with them because of irreconcilable differences. If there had been more time to show the emotional fall-out from their break-up, it probably would have been clearer that it was actually a break-up…

Predictions made back at the start and how they worked out

My death predictions were Bryan or Harper dying. I didn’t want Harper to die, and I saw problems with Bryan dying, so I’m glad he was written off instead.

I got tired of writing and stopped. I didn’t proof read this.Trying to remember 6 episodes worth of stuff was hard. Never again.

Kabby baby 2k17// Radiation + 6 years and 7 days. Make it so. Or like. Give them that little boy Jaha has no business acting as a guardian for. I maintain that Wells was good despite his father/ because he didn’t like the coldness of Thelonious, not because he was a good father to Wells. I’d prefer they take that child.

I cannot believe you read this whole thing. You are a very nice person for doing so.

If Kabby is not together is S5 I will no longer be watching the show because on/off relationships make for annoying writing and in reality probs unhealthy relationships. Do better writers. No Ross/ Rachel. No MerDer (But that actually was ok because it wasn’t forever and then they had real issues to work through which was good). More Jim/Pam. Ben/Leslie. Coach and Tami Taylor. Time man/ Penne. Time man and Penne x infinity tbh. Can Sonya guest star on the 100? Please?

Happy Hiatus.

My attention turns to GoT: Ser Jorah and Petyr (Bae)lish.

Hopes: Daniel Portman keeps his real life facial hair because I would like Pod even more

#s4 #the 100 #rambles #just my thoughts #not all of them are good ones

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hellsbells91 · 8 years ago

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Black Sails 4.08 Watch Notes

I’m getting emotional whiplash watching Flint and Silver break down whilst Max tries to make it up to Anne.

“There are no two people close enough that something cannot separate them. Some point at which they were never fully connected to begin with.”

Billy’s words are so much more important when you consider that ultimately it’s not Madi that divides Flint and Silver, she is an element of it yes, but the root cause is something that has plagued their relationship since its beginning. What it’s really about is seeing each other as equals, rather than one being better than the other. Silver demanded to be seen as Flint’s equal rather than a lesser in season 3, going into season 4 he expressed concern over himself being elevated above Flint, and I think that’s a conflict that’s never really been gotten over. Flint is happy to stand side by side with Silver when Silver is willing to blindly follow his ideas - if Flint’s increasing requests for Silver to trust him in season 4 are anything to go by, whatever ‘trust’ that exists between them is growing more and more strained. But when Silver demands the same of Flint, to follow his lead without question, Flint sees this as a betrayal of that trust.

Quick aside - Silver’s voice in that first scene with Flint is doing things to me. Ehem anyway, Silver raises a very good point on what Flint plans on doing after the war is over. If they burn it all down, how are they going to build it back up? Who is going to build it back up? Flint’s answer? Blind faith that somehow it will all work out. It’s not hard to see why Silver is a little perturbed by Flint’s plan.

Having said that, Flint reveals that his faith lies within what Silver and Madi can achieve together once the war is over. So not only does Flint not see a part in this future for himself, he is showing (in his own way) trust in Silver and Madi to keep going after his part is done, after he has gone.

“I think that you are the best of us.”

I had to take a moment here, just to think on Flint’s sincerity because really? He is aware of John’s nature perhaps better than anyone else, and he thinks he’s the best man among them?

“The two of you together are the world in balance.”

This is tragic because again, Flint sees no part in this for himself, his time here is ending - but in Silver and Madi’s relationship he sees the same balance he once brought to Thomas’ ideals. One to see the world as it is, and one to see it as it should be. So it’s maybe not that Flint sees Silver as the best among them per se, but one half of a partnership most well-equipped to make the world better and to keep the alliance strong.

Switch to Anne and Max and we’re once again hearing about a potential future that does not include any room for their relationship. Parallels much guys? On one hand Granny Guthrie is trying to convince Max that she needs a ‘husband’ in name only in order to gain standing in Nassau, and on the other Flint is talking about a world in which Silver and Madi (referred to most oddly by Silver as ‘a wife’) can build together but without him...

I was holding my breath for the moment in which Silver starts ordering Flint around, and to Flint’s horror it’s exactly as Israel warned a few episodes ago. But at the same time as it all goes down, the pain is present on both of their faces. Silver doesn’t want to turn and see Flint’s reaction, doesn’t want to see the betrayal on his face. And I mentioned this earlier but Flint’s little head shake as he looks Silver up and down is simply heart-breaking because it’s a look that speaks volumes (yay again for Toby Stevens!!). It feels like a look Flint would have directed at Silver before they were friends, when Flint thought him just a no good lying thief out for his own gain. And it seems as if Silver hates this, maybe there’s a part of him that is even ashamed at what he has done.

No shot is fired, no blood drawn, but the ensuing fight between Silver and Flint is one of the most tense scenes I’ve watched. And as much as I understand how Flint feels like Silver taking the cache has broken down the alliance and killed upcoming war, I’m kinda with Silver on this in that he has followed Flint wherever he has led, but it’s too much for Silver to ask the same? It’s the same imbalance in their relationship rearing it’s head.

As suspicious as everything is surrounding their ‘break-up’ and the possibility that it’s all a ruse to trick Rogers, this argument seems wholly genuine to me. It may turn out that they are lying to Rogers and Billy and they’re still working together, but in this moment the damage to their relationship has already been done. Some part of this argument may have been scripted on their behalves but I am almost certain it was rooted in true pain. It remains to be seen how they can, or even if they can, put the pieces back together.

Not to mention at some point Jack is going to show up on Skeleton Island (hopefully maybe Anne and Max will get back to Nassau in time for this) and throw a spanner in the works (whatever the works may be).

Meanwhile our female focus of the episode remain in Boston, with Max and Grandma Guthrie quietly moving pieces around the board. I like it. But Granny’s shrewdness is something that I am really glad Max wants to avoid and ultimately chooses to. Max has spent recent times sacrificing her love to keep her standing in Nassau, she watched Eleanor do the same. And even though it may have been what she thought was best at the time, she’s done choosing the wrong things to protect. In Max’s eyes, no future is worth anything to her if Anne is not included in that vision, she has chosen ‘happiness’ over leading Nassau. In doing this we’re again seeing a parallel between her and Silver’s stories - Granny Guthrie can be compared to Israel Hands in this respect xD.

beautiful scene btw, had me in tears.

If Silver and Flint are plotting something unbeknownst to everyone else, I think it went down between their argument and when Flint recounts the tale of Skeleton Island to Dooley. Adding to the list of suspicious things as well is how Flint says Silver may have been compromised by fear over the Island’s story, when it’s just as likely that the plan is not just to lie about Silver’s state but to actually spook Dooley and the rest of the crew.

Not to mention the fact that Dooley and Flint take the cache in broad daylight, in full view of the ship where they can easily be spotted.

And Joji is among the number of people Silver enlisted to find and kill Flint. Our Joji who has stuck by Flint through everything? Who among everyone is probably the least likely to not only kill Flint but Dooley as well? Arrrhhh I don’t know what to think anymore!!

Israel Hands is of course the big risk in all of this, and despite being told in no uncertain terms not to kill Flint, this is no real guarantee that he won’t do just that. On top of this Silver would be making one hell of a gamble on Rogers not killing Madi anyway despite him saying he will recover the cache.

Whatever the outcome I know that the treasure will eventually be hidden from Silver, and I really can’t wait for more pain to see how this all pans out! Luke’s tweets are not helping things.

#bs spoilers #4.08 #xxxvi #black sails #john silver #James Flint #watch notes #this show puts me through so much pain

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meanwhileinoz · 7 years ago

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10+ Ex Husbands Reveals When It Was Finally Enough For Them, Grab Popcorn

If you’ve wondered how far a man has to be pushed before they say enough,

Then this article will answer it for you. Most divorce stories online are because of something scandalous or heartbreaking, like cheating or falling out of love. And it’s often from the female perspective too, so these stories are extremely eye opening. These are stories of men who have been through something devesating, and there’s no way you can read these without feeling for them.

These were shared on Reddit, and almost none of them have a happy ending. Divorces aren’t exactly Disney endings. They’re agony, and legal court systems favour women, with the wife getting custody of the children 84.4% of the time where the husbands become ATMs to provide child support checks regullarly.

Get popcorn, get tissues, because this is going to be an emotional ride.

Source: Reddit

1. Affairs.

“She let me know she was pregnant and wanted my permission to tell all her girlfriends during a girls’ night out.

Since I knew there was no possible way it was my child, she was also unknowingly admitting to having an affair. I can do math and deduce, and she clearly couldn’t. It was with her boss.

Lawyered up the next day, and he ate her alive in court. I got primary custody of our child we already had, and child support, and a sheriff’s notice that she had to vacate my home in 30 days.

I never knew she could be that dumb.”

2. The abusive mom wins custody.

“I always refused to raise my voice during arguments, which usually made her crazier and scream louder. After one such argument, during which our 3-year-old daughter was playing upstairs, she started coming down at the same time her mother was storming up the stairs like a child of comparable age. Our daughter was in the way and her mother got in her face and screamed, ‘GOD, I FREAKING HATE YOU, MOVE!’

Of course, my daughter came to me, hurt. That was the moment I decided it was over.”

3. Thanksgiving.

“We were already not speaking. It was Thanksgiving. I knew she wasn’t going to bother, but I made a turkey and whatever goes with turkey for my then 8-year-old daughter. I had the turkey out on the counter to rest after roasting.

My beloved bride walked in, calmly threw the turkey in the kitchen trash can, and walked out.

I had to take my kid to freaking Golden Corral for Thanksgiving. That was it. I was done.”

4. Afghanistan.

“When, after being in Afghanistan for 8 months (May ’02-Nov ’02), she was missing, but had my car, I found two random women, with kids and pets, living in the apartment I paid for, the electricity cut off, had no money in my bank account, a pay advance authorized by my commander, and a friend telling me to go easy on her because she was 5 months pregnant with HIS kid.

OH! And he had had heart surgery to remove some kind of cysts from his heart just before I left. He was 23, had a pacemaker, and basically half a heart. If I scared him, he could die.

I’d say that was the moment.”

5. Narcissist.

“Besides the narcissism, random violence and violent outbursts, it was her strange punishments. Her last one doomed her. My crime? I forgot milk on the way home from work so she didn’t talk to me, not one word, for a week. PURE BLISS, for a week. When she asked if I was ready to apologize, I handed her the divorce papers.

‘Why?’

‘Because you rob me of solitude, but provide me with no companionship.’”

6. Abused for years.

“I endured a physically, emotionally, and mentally abusive relationship for over six years with my first wife, four of which we were married. There were many, many instances that should have caused our marriage’s demise.

The proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back, though, was eight days after I had major oral surgery. Due to a freak medical occurrence, I had to have 28 teeth cut out and two holes drilled into my sinus cavities from top of the back of my gums.

She and I were in a grocery store parking lot, and I asked her not to start an argument in the store because it’s a small town and I was so tired of being ‘those people.’ Her reaction was to backhand me in the mouth. Six times.

Or at least, I counted six times because I’m pretty darn sure I lost consciousness. I just remember waking up when we were pulling into our driveway while she was freaking out because my face was against the window and blood was coming from my mouth like a fountain.”

7. Thankless.

“Not me, but one of my best friends. He got a pretty substantial year end bonus from work. He decided to use most of it for his wife’s Christmas gift and pay off her remaining student loans (~$14,700).

Christmas morning (he was nice enough to let me stay at his place when I traveled for work, as he lived 20 minutes from the airport) we all woke up and had breakfast. His family and her parents came over and we started exchanging gifts.

Besides paying off her loans, he had gotten her a few times items. She opened the card saying her loans were paid off she just sat there for a minute. After the silence, and assuming she was kinda in shock, she asked, ‘Did you seriously not get me anything else? I bought you that stupid keyboard (the wrong one, btw) and you only got me a few things?’

At that point, his brother-in-law and myself decided to go hang out in another room for a while they ended up getting into a huge fight. A day later, when he was dropping me off at the airport, he told me that he was going to visit a lawyer and get a divorce.”

8. Bisexual wife.

“She woke me up in the middle of the night to grab the extra blanket off the bed. I expected to find her disgruntled on the couch alone the next morning. I found her in the guest bed with another woman- both naked. No forewarnings or clue-ins. Just despondent betrayal.

I woke her for answers and got a whole lot of mumbles. Decided to split for ‘space.’

That weekend, we both ended up at the same bar on the same dance floor. I thought she’d followed me there to make amends. She’d brought the same girl and completely ignored me when I called out to her. When I walked up to her, she pretended I was a stranger…I told her I’m not going to play any games and didn’t know what was going on. She said she didn’t want to be married. I gave her the ring back and went to tell my friends goodbye that night. I didn’t want to tell them why, I felt so embarrassed.

She saw me talking to my friends and decided to make out in front of us with her new woman directly on the dance floor eight feet away from where I stood while everyone stared.

Looking back now, I realize she probably was scared to come out. I can give her credit for that. But she was an awful person for the way she did it and for never having the courage to say to my face whatever she was feeling. I thought we were best friends. I thought we were going to be together forever… She asked me to marry her.

Now I’m just grateful for not being with a liar and a coward. I’ve made a fresh start. Sold everything. Traded my entire wardrobe and style to feel like I’m in a new life. Sure, I’ve lost more money than I ever thought imaginable. And the dog… I just keep optimistic that I’ll find someone who deserves my time. I don’t focus on the past and I have faith in God and the future.

Whoever I marry next will be grateful for a man like me and loyal. But until then I’m gonna enjoy the single life again and just play.”

9. Wes Coast.

“We met and spent the first seven years of our married life on the West Coast, then moved East. Five years later, I took a job back on the West Coast, but it was the middle of the school year, so I went out ahead and lived on my own until everyone could join me.

Things hadn’t been very good between us for a while, but I hadn’t articulated it to her—or even myself—beyond vague feelings of dissatisfaction.

One weekend, out there on my own, I decided to take a day and drive to one of my favorite towns, a town in which I had lived long before I knew her, a town we had visited often while married. It was late afternoon and I was about to head back to my hotel when I realized that I could visit a particular beach that had special meaning to me from my earlier life there.

I stopped at a convenience store, grabbed a Grolsch like I used to drink on that beach, and drove out there. Hiked out to a specific spot I remembered, sat down, popped the beer, and looked out over the ocean. And it hit me that I hadn’t done that in over 20 years. Whenever we’d visit the area, I’d suggest stopping at the beach, but she wasn’t interested and would always veto the idea.

I’m sure reading this it seems like the tiniest thing, but it was the catalyst for me, realizing just how completely dissatisfied I was with our relationship. I think from the time I sat down, I knew it was over within maybe 10 minutes. Just sitting there, sipping my beer, looking at the ocean.”

10. Always absent.

“My wife was around less and less…had to be free to live her life, go out with her friends. More often than not, she would call me to pick our daughter up from daycare, even though she’d promised to pick her up and have some girl time…’Just tell her I’m working late or not feeling well.’

She always had something better to do and the kids were old enough to know better. I went to pick our daughter up one day. When they called her name, she came running over until she saw it wasn’t mom, again. Her shoulders drop and she slowly walked over to ask, ‘What’s her excuse this time?’ That was the breaking point. Told her to get out and even helped pay her security deposit to get her out.”

http://ift.tt/2zStKIW

#ENTERTAINMENT

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