#they’re bros?? besties??? dudes??? nuh uh that’s gay

[sidthesciencekid2007]

buck and eddie are like this 🤏 close to being canon i jsut know it (or at least i hope so because WHAT IS WITH ALL THIS FORESHADOWJNG)

[toddsfall]

You’re making a ruin of me

Nursey takes Dex as his fake date to an Andover reunion on his birthday.

Written for day 7 of @nurseyweek (prompt: memories or red) Happy last day guys! This has been so fun to do :D

read on AO3

/////

“Do you think they bought that?” Dex leaned in close so he could whisper in Nursey’s ear. Nursey felt tingles travel down his spine from the tip of his ear, where he could feel the ghost of Dex’s lips, all the way to his toes.

He cleared his throat. “Uhum. Yeah. Uh, yeah that was good. I don’t think they suspect a thing.”

“Good, I’m giving it my all here haha. Guess all those time my sisters made me act out the plays they’d written paid off huh?” Dex laughed.

Of course Dex had to rely on his best acting skills to act like his boyfriend, Nursey thought sourly.

Dex started batting his eyelashes rapidly, in a move that was probably supposed to be sexy but just made him look ridiculous.

Nursey poked him in the nose, which made Dex go cross-eyed for a second. It was stupidly endearing. “Stop acting a fool. You look like I just pepper sprayed you.”

Dex smirked. “Kinky.”

“Oh my god, you’re ridiculous. I’m fake breaking up with you.”

“But then how will you ever show those Andover assholes how well you’re doing now that you’ve moved on?” Dex looked way too pleased with himself. Nursey was just about to hit him over the head for looking so smug when he spotted them.

“Shit, they’re coming back. I thought we scared them off earlier.”

“Yeah, I thought so too. We really went for it! I really thought that was going to work. God, couples who display so much PDA in public usually gross me out. They’re the worst.

Nursey raised his eyebrows at him.

“Right, well. Other couples are the worst. Besides, we’re only a fake couple. That doesn’t count.” He was probably imagining the sad look in Dex’s eyes.

Nursey’s stomach turned. “No, you’re right. It doesn’t. They’re still coming our way though. Maybe we should just go.” He was ready to forget about this entire night.

“Nuh-uh Nurse, I didn’t dress up all fancy schmancy for you to suddenly bail on me. If you want to scare those assholes away, we’re just going to have to step up our game. They’ll get the hint eventually. Trust me, alright?”

Before Nursey could so much as blink, Dex grabbed Nursey by the lapels and kissed him full on the mouth. Nursey couldn’t help it, he melted. He clutched at Dex’s shoulders to avoid grabbing him anywhere else. He didn't want to cross any more lines than he already had tonight.

Dex loosened up on his lips a little and whispered "Follow my lead.".  He went back to kissing him, yanking him even closer. And then he started moaning. Obviously fake, but still. It was kind of turning Nursey on. He felt Dex tug at his hair, egging him on to join him.

God, Dex was going to kill Nursey. Why had he allowed himself to get into this situation?

////

Nursey sighed deeply. It wasn’t trying to get anyone’s attention, he just felt miserable.

“What’s wrong Nursey? You’re sighing an awful lot. I usually run to the kitchen to escape my worries, not create more, hon.” Bitty turned to him, holding his knife up like he was going to personally chop all of Nursey’s troubles in tiny pieces.

“Sorry for bumming you out, Bits. I can go lay on the couch if you want.”

Bitty crinkled his nose. “Now, you know I don’t want that. Spit it out, Nurse. I’ve been told I’m a good listener.” Bitty smiled at him encouragingly.

“Yeah Nursey, tell us.” Lardo chimed in from the other side of the table. He thought she’d been listening to music.

“It’s stupid. There’s this reunion at Andover next week. I RSVP’d a while back, thinking it could be fun. Now it turns out that most of my friends can come, I knew some of my hockey friends have games that night but now apparently my old bestie has to cancel too now. I can’t exactly back out of the event, people have already seen that I will attend on facebook. Before I know it, my mom will be on my case for not socializing enough. Ugh. And now I’m rambling too.” He laid his head on the table, sighing again.

“I’m sorry, hon. I don’t think I’ll ever go to a high school reunion, I’m glad I got away from that place.” Bitty answered sympathetically.

“I’m sorry you feel trapped, bro. I would come with you, but I have a test the next day.” Lardo reached out to put her hand on his shoulder. “Is there really no one there you can hang out with?”

“Nope.” Nursey raised his head. “I didn’t have many friends at that school, and now I’m going to be stuck with those judgmental assholes who liked to passively aggressively chew me out for, well… being me. It’s just going to bring up all these old ugly memories for me.”

Lardo squeezed his shoulder again. “I can help you come up with a better excuse if you want? I used to come up with the most elaborate lies for missing class when I was younger.”

Nursey smiled weakly at her. “That’s sweet Lards, but nah. I’ll just grit my teeth and get through it.”

Suddenly he heard Dex behind him. “What’s the matter Nurse? Someone got coffee on your favorite notepad again?” Sensing the mood in the room, Dex walked closer to Nursey. “Hey, what’s wrong bro? I haven’t seen you this upset since Frank Ocean delayed his album release for the third time.”

“Nursey has to go to an Andover reunion all on his own. Let’s just say there won’t be any friendly faces awaiting him there.” Lardo’s eyes bore into Dex’s, daring him not to make a smart remark for once.

“I’m… sorry man. Uh, can I help? I could go with you for back-up.” He had placed his hand on Nursey’s shoulder, on the spot where Lardo’s had been minutes before.

“Nah, bro. I wouldn’t want you to miss out on a Valentine’s date for me.” Nursey looked down, willing any thoughts of Dex and a potential date out of his head.

“Bro! It’s on your birthday?” Dex said, ignoring Nursey’s statement.

“Uh, yeah? Happy fucking birthday to me.”

“Well, then it’s decided. I’m going with you. As your date. Let’s show those assholes that us 'filthy gays' are not to be messed with.” Dex sneered at the last part. Nursey would have to ask him about that later. Clearly, he had had some issues with bullies in the past too.

Nursey considered it for a moment. Dex. As his date. On Valentine’s day. That might not be such a good idea. “Nah bro, you don’t need to come. It’s okay.”

“What, I’m not good enough to be your fake date Nursey?” Dex teased, the insecurity clear in his voice.

Lardo winked, and said “Yeah Nurse, who wouldn’t want this gorgeous redhead as his Valentine, huh?” The dirty, dirty traitor. She cackled when he tried to kick her under the table.

“Okay. Fine. Let’s do this Poindexter.” He cleared his throat, and tried to arrange his features so he looked solemn as he turned to Dex. “William Joseph Poindexter, will you be my Valentine?”

Dex pretended to swoon. “Why, Derek! I thought you’d never ask.”

Nursey laughed heartily. Then it dawned on him, he was actually going to have to go through with his now. He’d really fucked himself over.

/////

They had finally discouraged the Andover Assholes, as Dex had branded them, from coming over again. They were sitting down with people that Nursey vaguely knew, but luckily not good enough that he felt obliged to make small talk with them.

He felt tired, despite Dex’s best efforts being back at Andover was draining all his energy. They had done the rounds earlier, saying hello to all his favorite old teachers. Also a bunch of people he’d been halfway friendly with, that is to say they had never been outright homophobic or racist in his face. Whatever, he’d shown his face. It had to be enough, his mom would have to understand.

Having Dex around helped more than he would ever be able to express, but it also drained him. It was exhausting having to pretend he had this awesome boyfriend while simultaneously walking the fine line of not acting too convincingly, or Dex would notice that he had real feelings for him. It was, frankly, exhausting. Nursey felt like he was doing a balancing act and he could fall flat on his ass at any time, and everyone would stare and point. Just like old times, then.

He felt Dex nudge his elbow. “Hey Nurse, where’d you go bud?” he asked.

“Nowhere, I was just spacing out a little. I’m getting tired.” He know he sounded snappish and he hated it. Dex had done nothing but be kind to him tonight. He’d gone above and beyond for him.

“Wow, I know I’m a good kisser but I don’t I’ve ever tired anyone out this fast before.” Dex was trying to distract him.

Nursey smiled at him. “Don’t flatter yourself, William.”

“Oh-kay De-rek, I wouldn't dareee. ” Dex pronounced every syllable carefully, trying and failing to speak with a posh accent. It was a horrible imitation of the accent he had heard when watching Downtown Abbey with Holster. Nursey knew he was trying to sound like Nursey did when he talked with his parents, though.

Nursey shoved at his shoulder, grinning. “Asshole.”

“Ha! I knew my ex-ce-llent posh accent would work. At least I got you to smile.” He poked Nursey’s ribs. “I got something else that might cheer you up!” His eyes lit up like Chowder’s did every time he saw a puppy.

Seemingly out of nowhere, he pulled a present for Nursey. Where had he been hiding that?

“Happy birthday, Derek. I might not always understand what you do, but I always want you to feel free to be yourself.”

Nursey tried his best not to rip open the carefully wrapped present. It was a beautiful deep red notebook with his name embossed on the front. “Woah dude, chill. Thanks.” He smiled brightly.

Dex groaned. “I can’t believe I still haven’t managed to erase that from your vocabulary.”

Nursey smirked. “It’s okay man, I know wasn’t for a lack of trying.”

Dex punched him in the arm, lightly. “You just count yourself lucky that it’s your birthday, Nursey.”

////

He fixed his eyes on Dex. They were sitting on the steps outside, waiting for their cab. As soon as Nursey had called, they had decided they didn’t want to stay with any of those people in the same room for a minute longer than necessary.

“Hey Will? Thanks for coming with me tonight. You, uh, really helped me in there. I know you could probably have found more pleasurable ways to spend your evening. I really appreciate it."

“Oh man, what am I supposed to say to that? You know I’m bad at feelings Nurse. Just pretend I said something heartfelt just now.” Dex blushed, but his gaze softened when he turned to Nursey. “But seriously man, anytime. I probably wouldn’t have found anything better tonight. Spending the night shitting on rich assholes with my best friend is a pretty sweet way to spend my evening.” He bumped Nursey’s shoulder with his own. “The kissing wasn’t half bad either” he added in a rush.

Nursey raised an eyebrow. “Really? Spending time with me is always on the table, you know. I guess we could even find some rich assholes to shit on at Samwell.” He took a steadying breath. “And the kissing, that’s uh… that’s on the table too. If you want.” He added the last part, knowing that he was taking a risk. In that moment, he wanted to to be right so badly, he thought he was going to burst from it.

Instead of answering, Dex reached into his pocket. “There was actually something else that I wanted to give you with your gift. I, uh, wasn’t sure.”

He handed Nursey a bright red card, with a heart and hand-drawn hockey sticks on the front. Inside, it said ‘You don’t have to be all bi yourself tonight. Be mine.’. He looked up, confused. His traitorous heart was beating out of his chest, daring him to hope. Dex was looking at him nervously. He’d been right. His heart sang.

He pulled Dex close by looping his hand around his neck. Dex closed the distance between them and then, finally, they were kissing.

He couldn’t stop himself from saying “I see you put your cards on the table for me.”

Dex groaned. “Shut the fuck up Nurse. Are you going to kiss me, or what?”

Nursey was already leaning back in. Dex deepened the kiss and then did something with his tongue that had Nursey moaning loudly. Normally, this would probably embarrass him but he was too busy being kissed within an inch of his life to care.

This time, it was Dex who pulled away. He smirked and whispered “I knew the way to your heart was with puns.” Nursey kissed the shit-eating grin right off his face.