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bigdickfartsapolka · 5 years ago

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A Liveblog, because why not?

I, SCOTTICVS, being of stupid mind and tired body, have just atumbled upon the youtube that has "The Bravest Warriors, Season 1 (Every Episode)" and see that season 2 is in the suggested videos. I know nothing about it, and have only heard clips on tiktoks of catbug which is what made me search it, and so. I have come to the decision. That now, having seen 3 episodes. I will be live-blogging the rest of the episodes as I watch them, because this shit is too hilarious to not share with someone somewhere, so I am going to scream into the void until the void sends me suggestions that share whatever the fuck this sense of humor is back to me.

Episode 1, they are stuck in a timeloop and only learn about it at minute 3 of 5

How do they escape? They see their own corpses (2 sets) and decide "ain't no way I'm goin' in there". Episode over. BRILLIANT!

Episode 2, mystery dude called a FeelsLord or some biz shows up, talks all cryptically about the future and powers and then says psyche and makes puppies made of chocolate appear. Being as it is a sciency show, I bet they were all... Chocolate... LABS.

(I will not be apologizing for that, nor any other of my jokes. It was perfect and if you disagree then you’re wrong, and don’t click through to read more, because there will be a lot more that bad or worse... I’m sure of it already. I haven’t seen this show before at all, but I already love it.)

Episode 3! The holodeck is also the bathroom, which apprently they are all cool with just sharing as a crew because what are boundaries? I guess? And then the waterbuffalo dies by swarm of bees, which. Wow. That has such a D&D vibe to it. But even better, when Beth comes in, they're all just not sure if she saw or not, and then when she leaves she shows she totally did and locks them all in and loads up whatever the fuck BUTTER LETTUCE fantasy, Beth program 3 was, where the stripclub is all reverse-centaurs? And they all have a ..... Butter lettuce party in a spa? There's a hot tub? It's wild, but wonderful.

Episode 4. Here we go. First time viewing and fully new to me material from here on out. Weee. They're on a bus? Sorta? "SIGNS. THEY'RE EVERYWHERE IN THE FUTURE" Hahahahaha. And this kid. Can manifest toast. Alright, ... Oh. Too much toast. Dude. Memory loss episode. Fun? Wild. Everyone forgets everything. And the pilot decided to bail out and died in the vaccuum of space. Wow. what a bizarre show... JELLYKID, YES!... JELLYKID, NOOO! We assist peeps. Yeah. Hahaha. We're here to help. Jrllykid exclusively makes bread. And bad choices. I hope we see him again.

Memory Donk convention!?... Wooooow. Hahahahaha. President Memory Donk. Oh my. Oh, the best friend. But the kiss... But no. But okay. Pretty obvious where that is going to be going? Or not. Depends on whether they're gonna be trying to subvert or not and to what extent, etc.

...

Eposode 5! Buncheck. All about the booty this episode. Ooh. Avoiding the 100 years of baaad if they don't have things go well. Oh no. Poor little panic guy gets disappeared. Hahaha. Wooow. All about the butts and the dancing. Ooh! The guys butt said "Bully!" I love that when people say that. But oh no. Trouble. Ah! But the cut-in. Spark some jealousy. Yes, guy grows a spine, which is connnected to his enormous butt! And now they're doing buttstuff? Planet saved, by butt stuff. ... Moving on!

Episode 6! Ooh. We open on shooting and volcanos. Fun fun. A bomb. The EMOTION LORD! "I've been surviving alone on burritos for 8 long years." Let's quit spooning in the bouncy house and storm that hive! Hahahaha. More gunfire. Explosions. Emotion Lord claims to be Chris from the future. Woah, wait what? Denial, classic first response, good job Chris. I ain't your peppermaster. This show is so freakin' wild. The concierge, isn't he cute in his high chair. Ooh, no. Don't ask about the future. Temporal parasoxs, oh man. The concierge! "I'm not a bee, but Brother, I forgive you for that discrepancy" is such a Brennan Lee Mulligan NPC thing to say and has such an excellent energy to it. Aaawh, and he eats the B-12 and old dude gets more hair. Good ending.

Episode 7!

They have an invisible hideout? Wild. FIRST APPEARANCE OF CATBUG! Gas-powered stick? Weird. Ooh, Beth's friend makes me think of Marceline. Love the hair. All the guys want her and have 0 chill. No surprise, but still... Gas-powered Stick. Impossibear? Whata wild dude. Threw the stick, grew a tree, now a peach pit is giving Chris xray vision. Ooh, trouble, boyyo. Don't do that. Wha? A musical number?!? Nope. Got cut off. Too bad. Ooh, try something weird. It got weird alright. What the whaaa? So. That was a thing? Or, yah know, maybe it won't be. I dunno about continuity and this show yet. But hey! Catbug! Yaaay!

Episode 8!

Open on dramatic doors and then disco dance music. Time machine? Fun fun. Gonna get weird, I'd bet. New Miami? Whaaa? Wild. Hahaha. Ooh, memory goggles to show people in your brain stuff. Electric puke button? Whoa. That's terrible. Kill that awful character. But nooo, that's gonna make things worse somehow. "Hehehe. You're gonna punt children." "Sorry dude. Doesn't work out." Awh, too bad. No time machine thing this time.

Episode 9!

Everyone speaks gibberish? Seems that they understand each other though, so okay. Teleport to a portal or two and then angry laser dogs. Fire spirits make popcorn. I relate to them on a deep level. Apparently the ones on the planet are super sexist. No longer relate to them. Rude. Laserdogs meet other dog and things are good. First planet is good when gets plugged in with the power chord to the ship, so that's cool. Music puzzle on planet 3. Turns the whole world on its axis. Planetary alignment fixes speech problem. Wow. Weird. Hahahaha, but love it. Now who gets the big dude out of the pod?

Episode 10!

10 year anniversary of a jinx? Wow. Wild. Male female jive, and letting Beth sing I am the Walrus is just a wiiild addition. Cereal master fries her own face for dramatic effect. Wild. Ooh. His eyes glow. He has powers. Emotion lorded those seahorse dreams. Wiiild. "Run, fools. Run for your lives." "SOMEBODY GET GOD A MOJITO!" Woah. This is excellent and I love it. "IT'S THE DEVIL! SOMEBODY KILL HIM!" She remembers. Cereal lady goes home to talk to her Daddy instead of taking it out on customers and herself. And Beth does another jinx on Chris. This is such an enjoyable show.

Episode 11!

Wankershim leaves the holojohn and becomes his own independent individual. More carrots and breadcrumbs! ... Whaaa? Everyone becomes one with Wankershim. Their t shirts all change. CATBUG'S FRIENDS LINE! I love that CatBug sooo much. Ooh, mercy. Visions of the future. Always interesting, but also wiiild. The whole universe is Wankershim. Its always been Wankershim... That is rad.

I too have an interest in tacos.

The concierge!!!

Episode 12!

CATBUG! They're chilling in Beth's room. And then they get gifts from their parents! Catbug is an interdimensional jumper. Wild. I looove them. "SUGARPEAS! drop them! OKAY!" Makes much more sense now. Why would you make oatmeal cry? Good ask, Catbug. The presents grow into a horrible monster critter, a door, and then, naturally, as any D&D party. They immediately knock on it. They cannot open it. Paralyzed horse's log. Awh, poor thing. But wait. Who is Ralph Waldo Picklechips? What is there behind the door? Why does the old man miss Beth? What happened in the future?

Must find out more, next post, on BRAVEST WARRIORS. I will not liveblog that one unless there is any interest in this one though, because this actually took a lot of time and typing and also I am apparently 7 years behind or more on doing that, so. Oh well. Still, it was fun. GOTTA LOVE CATBUG!

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