#they only lived thru my head funnily

[spliceyblues]

Hi!

I love your art so much!!!! I can’t describe it very well (I think I may have some sort of weird Synesthesia or something I stg because my ways of describing art are always SO WEIRD) but it just… it makes me think of slow wiggles and waves and also gives me the vibes of like… a sleazy bar from the era of mobsters that’s playing jazz but in a really good way????

I stg that’s a good thing I promise I love your art I told you I’m bad at describing how I feel about art. 😭

Anyway idk if you’re taking requests but if you’re open to it I’d love to see Leona in your style! I was going through all your twst art and I don’t think I saw him!

I think he’d do well with your slinky, smirk art and I SWEAR THESE ARE COMPLIMENTS I JUST CAN’T THINK OF ANYWAY ELSE TO DESCRIBE IT IT’S SO GOOD THOUGH I LOVE IT

KACNKSSKSJSKSOJWNDC THANK YOU SM I LOVE WHEN PPL DESCRIBE ART IN SUCH UNIQUE WAYS BC YALL ARE SO CREATIVE WITH COMPLIMENTS INJUST AAHHHHH TY SM 😭😭🤧🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💖💖💖💖💘💘💘💘💘💘 and yes ur right I haven’t drawn Leona and mostly bc I stress myself out in trying to draw such a beautiful man like him that my perfectionism kicks in and unmotivates me to draw and I have this habit of not drawing certain characters only bc I can’t draw the simplest of things bc I think about how they look too much for example when I draw Trey or Lilia, I always get stuck on their hair and they take me a while for me to get satisfied with but yeah it’s time I finally drew this lion man, I really do appreciate you looking thru the content it makes me happy knowing y’all love my artwork 🥹🥹🥹💕💕💕cannot thank you all enough

Here’s a colored doodle of Leona

[mcl38]

unpopular opinion but i think carlos would hate lando by now if he had stayed at mclaren. lando was basically matching him that second year and u could see from their quali records that lando had more raw pace. and he's only continued to improve in consistency, race pace, tyre management, etc. since then. like i think the whole "carlando" dynamic would have ended horribly (but funnily for me) if he hadn't left.

hm. im actually not sure abt that

i saw this opinion on my dash literally like an hour ago and like i respect it as a hypothetical, but i just think carlos is the type to swallow his frustrations and play nice for the team as long as the team is being nice to him. (and i do think mclaren wouldve continued to be nice to him) (i have my own biases idk as me abt team orders and u'll get another essay)

so far, mclaren have not been in a position to b fighting for championships, so realistically even if carlos stayed the dynamic wouldnt have climbed that extra step of competitiveness. what would have changed would b - as u rightly pointed out - their teammate delta. they deffo would b way closer (and lando would maybe edge him out) but i dont think it would b the dominance landos had over his other teammates in 2021-2023. carlos has been landos strongest teammate in f1 so far (obvs this is mostly bc oscar is a rookie), and he has a very fun-to-watch talent thats clearly manifested itself since he moved to ferrari: not necessarily to drive the fastest or best, but to get the most points. man's probably one of the smartest drivers out there on track currently (barring his repeated divebombs into car 81 oops) and it rly shows. what lando would have on him in terms of consistency and raw pace carlos makes up for in scrappiness and adaptability.

so thats what the situation would look like in my head - close in the wdc rankings but w different strengths, likely often going for diff strategies and setups. lando 'i have a reputation for getting along with my teammates' norris (actual quote) and carlos, who clearly maintains a soft spot for lando & has had to adapt to a bunch of diff team dynamics with general success, would have to probably actively work at their relationship to keep it amicable, but i think theyd probably manage to do it. if anything they'd get closer than they are currently, which is not that close (mostly bc lando can't golf as much as he used to, they live in diff countries now, and lando struggles to juggle more than like 2.5 friends at a time)

so like yeah. if even charles (who destroyed the competitive psyche of a 4 time world champion with his dimples, tragic backstory, and a well placed monza win) cant make carlos break out of his friendliness (friendly, not friends - yes ive seen the pierre quote going around, yes im also aware he was mostly saying those things as a spiderman-printed band-aid over his intrateam dynamic's massive fuck-off gaping wound) then i dont see how lando could. i think a lot of the way lando deals w the social / human side of f1 is thru what he learned from carlos anyways, so they have quite compatible ways of working thru things. tldr i dont think lando would need to have sympathy for carlos anyways but if he did way that thing to a journo carlos would laughs in spanish and hit him in the balls or smth

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

an anon in the midst of depression

something that really sucks is that rn i'm going thru The Depression of My Life and my parents don't seem to get it. i wish my mum would try to listen to what i say and not just make everything about her, you know? ever since she divorced my dad, everything bad is somehow about him and she is always the victim. it's really tiring. i am tired, really fucking tired. i try to see the bright side of things, but even reading fanfiction is hard for me right now. fuck, i can't shower or eat or even sleep right. i legit don't know what to do, how to go on. alone. if this is life, how do i live it? if this is how it's gonna be, i'd rather just drop dead.

idk just felt like letting this out of my chest. it's not your responsability.

(i've been watching euphoria and jk's euphoria started playing and my brain did a whole thing and i ended up here)

bye 👋🏻👋🏿

I'm writing this while listening to Spring Day.

I know what you're going through right now is not my responsibility. I know you didn't ask for advice. I don't think you sent this to even get an answer. XD I simply felt like saying something, so I hope you're fine with that.

To be honest, life doesn't have answers. It has a fucking lot of questions and you can choose to find answers too them... or not. You're not required to have an answer to everything. And you won't. That's the nature of living.

I wish I could tell you someone will "get it". It would be nice if someone could understand. Truth is, no one will get it. That's because there's only one you and only one life you live in your own way. No one can live your life for you. When you are no longer here, no one gets all the "good" or the "bad" you left behind. It simply disappears into nothing.

Your mother went through a divorce and the way she copes is to complain about her ex to her child. You happen to be there; you have familial ties / a sense of responsibility / financial needs / etc, so you are forced to listen. It's probably not the best thing for her to do, but it is easy. Everyone wants to take the easy way out. It's easy. Right or wrong, the path of least resistance usually wins. I don't know your mother. I don't think she's a bad person. She's tired, like you.

When I was going through the darkest time in my life, I too felt alone. I was alone. When you're there, you don't want anyone else to be there with you, in fear of lashing out at them, in fear of them feeling what you feel, in fear of believing that this is it, that you will never have the strength to walk forward again. Was it you who made yourself this weak, surely not, and you think it's something else, it has to be, but deep down you fear - what if this is me, what if this is all I am?

It's so hard when you realize that you are, indeed, alone.

But, you know, I'll tell you a secret.

Even if all these things are true, even if all these shadows are within you, it means that you can also be the light. The concept of darkness wouldn't exist unless the concept of light is true. Winter comes. It is freezing, everything dies, but spring will come too, and everything grows back, slowly.

I know it's true, because I was there too.

I'll tell you though, the light that you find is yours, well, it might not be what you expect. It might not be that grand. It might just be the simple happiness of eating the food you enjoy, playing video games you love, writing porn about seven guys in Korea that don't know you exist! XD

It's okay to live a simple life, to have your own morals, to feel happy or sad when there's no reason to, to laze about and feel not so great, to feel what you feel right now. Funnily enough, there might come a point to where you're tired of being depressed. At least that is what happened to me. I got to a point where I thought, what am I doing, so what if I'm weird and not quite right in the head and don't have any big aspirations? So fucking what? You can make mistakes, you can feel like shit, you can make bad choices and eat a whole box of family size Cheez-Its by yourself in only two days.

I mean... maybe don't let that be your brand...

But, also, I can't really stop you, can I? XD

You can just be, whatever you want, however you want, whoever you want. And maybe you are not where you want to be right now, but you can be tired, you can be sad, you can try again tomorrow, or in a couple hours, or whenever you're ready.

You can.

(I hope you heard that in Yoongi's voice. :D)

I made it. I think you can make it too, if you believe a little more. And, anytime you want, you can come here. We can watch the snow fall as we wait for your winter to pass, little by little.

[clansayeed]

personal ramble about work under the cut. this bitch is long don’t feel the need to read it I just had to get things out a little

ok so like. I work at the bux, I think I’ve said that. and every quarter we have a POQ or partner of the quarter which is ideally the store partners vote for the person who has really stepped up, improved the most, helped out the most, or just overall really shown a dedication to everyone else (and I guess technically the bux values but I digress)

ideally

but in reality it’s more like a popularity contest. we’re only just phasing out of block scheduling (which other stores aren’t and??? anyway) so pretty much for the last quarter the same people have been working with the same people. but even when block isn’t in effect the morning and night crews rarely cross over so morning votes for morning and night votes for night. but because there are more morning people someone in the morning pretty much always wins

*for further knowledge: you don’t win much, I think it’s like a $75 bonus or something and a little certificate but some stores go all out and get like flowers or a small gift basket -- some people at our store get baskets and others just get the minimum, depends on the mood of the people arranging it I guess

so this last winner wins (she’s morning, mid, and night by the way, so the usual rules don’t apply), and like part of me isn’t surprised and part of me is. isn’t because she is a hard worker, does cover a lot of shifts and hustles, and is generally pretty much always in an upbeat attitude. but isn’t because she’s notorious among the night crew for taking a lot of shortcuts to get cleaning done and stuff... and most of the time we end up having to go behind her and do the same thing again but right this time. things like taking apart pumps before they’re washed so the chambers don’t fill with water and sit there for days or taking apart caramel bottles so they don’t have old residue in them when brought out to make more

like in many aspects she is a very good and hard and enjoyable coworker but I feel like the things that are being ignored in spite of that... matter? because they just make our lives harder when we have to essentially do the same task twice. but funnily enough that isn’t the point of this at all

so I’ve never won. that is not a surprise in the least. I’ve worked there for nearly 3 years now and have long since accepted that the manager may smile to my face but she’s kind of been trying to find a way to get rid of me with as little issue as possible

I’ll admit my faults. I have an issue with the way things are run. but if you’ve worked at this place or any store in the company you know that “taking it to HR or your DM” is about as effective as telling someone’s best friend you don’t like them. very cliquey stuff. and the night crew usually always gets shafted so we all have a kind of unspoken bro code where we complain if we need to... and don’t go blabbing or tattling like children?

well... most of us. turns out one shift and a couple of people have been like... reporting back to the SM which is super gross. so I’ve gotten in trouble a couple of times and know I’m not her favorite. I’ve had 2 write-ups

one for a situation that spiraled out of control and led to me having a panic attack on the floor but I felt pressured to keep working so I was written up for disruptive behavior or something (I have an extreme fear of authority figures in any fashion so I didn’t know I could dispute the write-up until after I signed the acknowledgement)

and one for “not adhering to making the partner environment feel safe and welcoming” idk it was bollocks and in order to get me into the meeting to write me up, she took my name off of the schedule so I would call her and ask what was up only to make me wait a week for the meeting. it was super gross and led to a really dark depression spiral... on christmas too

anyway. I’m not winning any time soon. I work hard, I try my best; I know there are a lot of things I can improve on and need to improve on but that’s anywhere. anyone who works with me knows I hate being idle and will help out however I can. we all have bad days, but generally I think I’ve improved in the last year which... has been pretty big since COVID and losing my grandmother to it and everything

SO TO THE WHOLE POINT OF THIS RANT not that anyone is still reading lmao

the other day we were talking about who we voted for since the poq winner was already announced. I was just saying it because I voted for one of the newer people because I feel like she’s more quiet and didn’t get recognized. then I joked (my self-insulting humor is pretty well-known there) that I probably only got one vote, from probably my best friend there, and it was probably immediately chucked out

so this shift (who actually was the cause for my second write up because she was one of those little narcs and tried to pretend she knew nothing about it which was the worst part) and I are talking about it and she straight up says to me well I was thinking about voting for you... but I didn’t want to WASTE MY VOTE

those specific words

I laughed it off at the time, pretended to be fake offended and brushed it off since I know I’m no one’s favorite, but... it really fucking hurt to hear that. like I work my ass off there. I’ve literally bled for that place lmao. I break my back and a lot of the time do the jobs of 2-3 people at once to compensate for shitty labor hours (most of us night people do tbh, I just have more flexibility in where they put me) and I’m pretty much well-known for earning us good tips in the drive thru with my good attitude

I’m not saying I do more work than anyone else... but so then why is including me among those very same people a laughable thing, and a waste? like way to break someone’s fucking spirit

and it hurt more I think because I know she’s like the SM’s little pet -- even though her shifts are shit shows -- so it probably was a waste of a vote...

IDK. I never meant to stay at this job this long but then COVID happened and it’s still hard to find a decent paying job with benefits these days and I like most of my coworkers and would hate to leave them and need to keep working until I have another job lined up...

but it just really... really broke me down. like I feel shit about myself for literally everything else in my life on a daily basis. it just hurt to have what I can normally write off as my anxiety messing with my head as something true instead. I’m not liked there and higher up people would be glad if I was gone

so that’s fun

[izzy-b-hands]

20-30!

Thank you so much for asking!!!!

20. Favorite character to write?

Already answered, but I don’t mind re-answering cuz I thought maybe I’d narrow my three way tie, but alas, no lol. Still a tie between Ahkmenrah, Snafu, and Skwisgaar.

21. Least favorite character to write? 

Ooh-tbh, Larry from NATM just because I feel like I always make him an asshole? Like, I haven’t published all my fic ideas for NATM because I keep making him really mean? And in some it works but in others I’m like ‘jesus chill Lee he’s just a Dude trying his best’ but also at the same time I feel the way Stiller played him and his character arc means he’s got some major ego to him as the films go on? Idk that isn’t a hot take or anything just me being frustrated with Ben Stiller lol

22. Favorite story you’ve ever written? 

Hard choice, because I love all my kids, but I cried after writing this one lol: https://aboutthatmelancholystorm.tumblr.com/post/186781309036/you-know-that-i-love-you

It hit some personal stuff for me, so to be able to have it work organically in a fic so I could also like, mini therapy session myself? Cool af. Also, ppl seemed to like this a lot too, and while that validation isn’t the only reason I write, it’s always cool when my writing makes ppl happy. 

23. Least favorite story you’ve ever written? 

I don’t really have a least favorite, but I do have some I’m more frustrated with, due to how long they took me to write, etc. Currently? The answer to this is my Mark the Date series because A. it is taking me a day and an age to finish it and B. I feel like it kinda flopped, so it’s hard to pull up any energy to finish it, but like...I may as well now lol. I’ll get it done eventually.

24. Favorite scene you’ve written? 

Oh god tbh I have too many I love just cuz like

I can go back to how I felt writing them and yeah

But as of most recent fics, I really this bit: 

-Snafu patted the blanket near his head, and waited for Eugene to put out his pipe and lay back beside him before snuggling close to him. “You could be right. Could be God. Could just be love.” “How’s that?” “I think love has its own way. Even before you meet someone, even before you know you’re fallin’ for ‘em. Love’s just…out there, like the air or somethin’. Finds you when the time is right, and finds who you click with. You gotta do the rest, the stayin’ in love part, but that bringing together, that first spark…that’s love just existing, and doin’ what it needs to so the world keeps spinnin’, so people make it through tough shit,” Snafu replied. “I like that,” Eugene said. “Think love did a good job with us. Makin’ sure we found each other.” Snafu pressed a kiss softly to the corner of Eugene’s mouth. “Sure did. Wouldn’t ever want to be with anyone else. I don’t even know what that looks like, and I don’t want to.” “Same here,” Eugene’s mouth was warm as he kissed him back. “Here’s to love for making sure you found me.” -

from this fic: https://aboutthatmelancholystorm.tumblr.com/post/186926226531/absolution-is-the-taste-of-your-lips

Because I’m sappy af more than I let on, and also this was a chance to like, write out my own feelings via Snafu. And that was a pretty cool and fulfilling thing for me, ya know? 

25. Favorite line you’ve ever written? 

oh god this is another hard one to narrow down but

I always come back to this line and go ‘oh shit did I really write that. Nah, someone better than me at this had to have. They briefly possessed me or something”:  

-Music and talking and shouting and footsteps collide kaleidoscopic in his ears, but none bearing the one sound that he’d run to if he heard it.-

from this fic, mentioned twice now in this post lol: https://aboutthatmelancholystorm.tumblr.com/post/186781309036/you-know-that-i-love-you

I really love alliteration, and for me this line just sums up how it feels to walk thru a city when you aren’t just wandering really, but are looking or waiting for someone, and have that awful yet sometimes good feeling of expecting to hear or see them but it feels like you’re waiting or searching forever and in the meantime the city just lives on around you, a stopped platelet stuck in a vein full of vitality. Like, idk if it hit any of my readers that way, but that’s what I was trying to get across lol, so the line always hits me hard in a good way when I scroll thru my writing tag and see it. 

26. Story you’re most proud of? 

Gosh

I gotta choose just one kid for this aldsfkja I’m bad at choosing I love my gaggle of ragtag goofballs. I have an original piece I’d choose for this, but I’ve never posted it on here, so I’m gonna choose out of my fanfic on here instead.

One I am really proud of is this one: https://aboutthatmelancholystorm.tumblr.com/post/186781309036/you-know-that-i-love-you

and I know it’s the third time it’s been part of an answer on here but

I really love this one idk. Thinking back to how I felt while writing it, how it all flowed in a certain way. The whole experience was just something else, and I’m proud of this one in a certain way I find myself, funnily enough, unable to describe. 

27. Best review you ever got? 

Okay this sounds cheesy but like

I really do love and appreciate every review or review-like thing I’ve ever gotten so I can’t choose just one for this

Like, y’all gotta understand, I’ve deleted some of it and erased traces of it from my blog, but I’ve written for years on here, I have some stuff on my ao3, and for the longest time I got nothing back, or very nearly nothing. Maybe a few likes, but no comments and not much else. I always just rolled with it and assumed I just wasn’t writing anything good enough to inspire reviews. Idk if that’s true or not, but in any case it means I cherish every comment, like, reblog, and anything review-like in nature because I’m so grateful to have it now, and I know it could well be pure luck that I stumbled up on a really supportive bunch of fandoms with great readers. 

In other words, thank y’all for every kind word and like and reblog and also I may be an immortal feeding off of validation of my art, but we’ll see on that last bit, because I haven’t tested it. 

28. Worst review you ever got?

One from middle school. I’d just finished my very first novel, gave it to a friend to read, and he said it ‘smacked of being too fanciful and childish, something only kids and women would read’ (it was a YA fantasy novel so I mean... what exactly he expected, idk cuz he knew what it was before I gave it to him, like it’s supposed to have those elements as a lot of these sorts of novels/stories do, and that isn’t a bad thing about them at all, so like...what his damage was idek.)

Also this is the same dude who texts me randomly and is really weird abt his friendship with me and happens to be an English teacher now (RIP to his students.) 

Anyway, after he said that I tossed a review right back, because well, middle school and also I was very upset with him because I’d not asked for anything other than a general ‘if you picked this up randomly and started it, would it suck you in enough to keep reading or would you put it down’ like that was literally all I needed him to answer for me. So I told him his latest novel (his second at that point) was essentially just him masturbating to his own opinions (because he’s an arguer, who loves to tell ppl they’re always wrong, and that’s by his own admission) for one hundred pages, and not in a way that anyone else would care to read. He was pissed, but so was I. We didn’t talk for a good week, and we had almost all our classes together lol. 

Like, getting nothing back in review sucks too, but this one has stuck with me forever. Best part? I mentioned it to him a few years back, and he only vaguely remembered it, and followed it with “but I’ve said a lot of rough stuff about your work. I mean, it deserved it at the time, but you might be good at this someday!” 

I didn’t smack him, but I really, really wanted to. 

29. Favorite story/poem of another author

This doesn’t specify on Tumblr or not, so I’ve got two: one from outside tumblr, and one from on here.

A. When I have Fears That I May Cease to Be by John Keats

When I have fears that I may cease to be   Before my pen has gleaned my teeming brain,Before high-pilèd books, in charactery,   Hold like rich garners the full ripened grain;When I behold, upon the night’s starred face,   Huge cloudy symbols of a high romance,And think that I may never live to trace   Their shadows with the magic hand of chance;And when I feel, fair creature of an hour,   That I shall never look upon thee more,Never have relish in the faery power   Of unreflecting love—then on the shoreOf the wide world I stand alone, and thinkTill love and fame to nothingness do sink.

B. Again, this Tumblr one could be a huge ass list because y’all on here are amazing, but one I’ve been rereading over and over again recently is @xmxisxforxmaybe ‘s Remnants series, which can be found here: https://xmxisxforxmaybe.tumblr.com/post/186702235396/remnants-complete-work

Like, Ahk as a character is captured so well, and I love the way the plot twines and also when the smut comes up? Very good A+ smut, something I value pretty highly on and off Tumblr because man, sometimes smut is just work to write, so I appreciate it when it’s really good. All around, this series has captured my heart and I legit have a link to it saved on multiple devices so if I need something to read, I can just pull it up right away. 

30. Hardest part of writing? 

Self-doubt. It’s the biggest hurdle for any artist, regardless of the art in question I think, but with writing it seems to double down a lot. Like, you have to really get out of your own head, even as you spend all your time there with your writing ideas. Shit gets weird and twisted, man. 

For the longest time, I really let self-doubt defeat me too, and I regret the time I lost to that. I still get hit with it randomly, cause I don’t think it every really goes away for any writer, not even the big names like Stephen King or Neil Gaiman (who I’m half tempted to @ on here purely because I wanna know his feelings on this stuff because I respect and admire him as an artist and his thoughts very much, but also he’s a very busy man so I’m not gonna bug him by doing that lol.) 

All there is to do is to work with it, push past it, and most importantly keep writing. I have days where that feels like the hardest thing, but each day I manage to get past it and get the words down? I let myself feel proud of that, and mark it as an achievement in my Big Book of Stuff I’ve Done in This Life. 

[intothespideyverses]

so I had a season 2b/3 predictions post in my drafts that’s been sitting there since the bar mitzvah episode but now that so many Things have happened I feel like I kinda need to redo it. funnily enough I predicted juffy (but it was one-sided), ham having a midlife crisis (although the midlife crisis was linked to ham having a health scare that caused him to try to ‘live every day like its his last’ and not ham being so Done with his family that he just leaves them for india) and the post also mentions tyrus and g*briel coming back (neither have been been confirmed yet but they’re very likely) so! here’s my New and Improved list of Season 3 Predictions/Ideas:

[Disclaimer: I doubt a lot of this will happen bc my mind automatically goes for the most melodramatic scenario. This is still disney channel and they’re too cowardly to go thru with like half of this tbh. also tw for minor abuse mention!]

The G*briel Plot

-g*be comes back and reminds bex of “””why she can never marry anyone””” just as bowie is about to bring up maybe getting back together again. the reason why they shot a wedding scene and the whole green screen thing is bc bex has a nightmare about marrying bowie but then everyone’s heads turn into gabe’s. the following is literally copy and pasted from the first post and tbh I don’t think things will happen this way anymore (I originally thought miranda wasn’t going to be a snake and that her and bowie would get married, leading bex to run back to g*briel so andi could have a father figure in her life again) but it’s still a p interesting plot I think so: g*be’s an abusive asshole. it’s still disney so I doubt they’d show that much but like…he’s very manipulative and he kisses bex really hard all the time in front of everyone and he’s super possessive, etc. he gives bex the silent treatment every time she hangs out with bowie and thus the whole “ask if they’re mad 3 times” thing and on the third time he always yells at her in front of andi. andi notices all of this and tells bowie but bowie thinks she’s just saying that to break bex/gabe up so she can get back with bowie. that is until he witnesses the tomfoolery himself when the couples are on a double date so bowie takes her aside and starts questioning her but bex lies and this whole ugly thing continues on for several episodes until bex and satan have one last fight that goes too far (he says something about andi probably) thats about to get physical and andi strolls in w/ a phone in her hand like 91 fucking 1 bitch. pack your bags ur going home rat! and he’s finally gone and andi tells bex that she doesn’t need another dad if it means bex puts herself thru that kinda torture. and they have another closure ceremony <3

The Divorce Plot

-ham decides to permanently travel the world. he probably comes back for an episode to get cece to sign them divorce papers. this starts a huge plotline that will probably get ignored after 2 episodes lbr here but we finally see cece SNAP bc the way she’s been behaving lately has definitely been leading up to that

-bex is going off the rails at this. she starts slacking at work and the business that caused the rift in her parents’ marriage in the first place is starting to fall apart. the light bill is going unpaid and bex is crumbling. she doesn’t want anyone to know so she makes andi stay at cece’s while she’s living in darkness. bowie visits one day and is like “tf happened to the lights” and bex has a breakdown. she tells him everything and bowie comforts her and offers to help (how? who the hell knows!). bex is so touched that she admits to having feelings for bowie still. bowie turns her down tho bc she’s in a rly emotional state and doesn’t want to take advantage of her. 

-andi eventually finds out what’s been going on and tells cece. cece is the last person bex wanted to know about cloud ten struggling, as cloud ten was the only thing keeping cece sane. they eventually have a heart-to-heart and bex/andi encourage cece to get some closure from ham

The Wandi Plot/Death of Jandi

-wandi rises. they resolve to just be friends at the end of season 2 but after a lot of things that I’ll mention later, andi realizes walker was the one for her :’). they paint a mural alongside cloud ten and cece makes some offhand comment about them becoming a painting duo, which they LOVE. they go around the town offering to paint on the walls of local businesses and it’s rly cute. god can you imagine the montages?? andi is in puppy love however we have like 5 episodes of her despairing over if walker even LIKES her anymore after months of just being friends. the roles are reversed and she’s the one doing all these things to get his attention. bc he’s not an oblivious Fool like jonah, walker picks up on this relatively fast and wandi is official!!

-that leads us to what will come of jandi? they perish of course. andi starts getting jealous of jonah hanging out with all these high school girls and naturally there’s more and more miscommunication and jonah whines about her friendship with walker etc etc etc just break up already god. andi eventually realizes that she’s just not feeling it and she puts her foot down to bex that he’s just not right for her!! bc tbh at this point the only reason she still fw jonah is bc of bex’s constant encouragement 

The Tyrus Plot

-tyrus happens obviously. if we ever actually get a real apology from tj (which I’m doubting at this point lol) this can happen smoothly. I kinda imagine tj trying to teach cyrus how to swim (swimming is definitely on cyrus’ list of things he can’t do) and the first time it happens tj is SO sure cyrus will be able to do it that he lets him go out on the deep end on his own and uh lmao ya boi almost drowns. buffy’s there and she saves him and she tells tj to stay away from cy bc hello he could’ve McDied and tj, crushed over the fact that cyrus could’ve met a watery grave, actually does what she says. cyrus tells buffy that it was his dumbass decision to go on the deep end tho, and tj didn’t make him do anything he didn’t want to do, so buffy relents. cyrus practices by himself and makes it his goal to learn how to swim in order to impress tj. he invites tj to the neighborhood pool one day as a surprise and he just like...cannonballs into the deep end (but he’s STILL not ready) and again almost fucking dies. tj saves him and he starts yelling at him a la titanic (”you’re SO stupid rose why’d ya do that huh???”) and then tj lets it slip that he would’ve mcfreaking lost it if something ever happened to cyrus bc “you mean a lot to me underdog” or w/e and during this whole rant cyrus realizes that he’s floating!! and he’s like yes bitch i did it im swimming! and tj’s so happy for him that he kisses him and cyrus almost drowns again from shock but it’s all good lol. maybe tj avoids him for a bit after the kiss bc cyrus’ reaction seemed like a rejection, but it wasn’t cyrus was honestly just shook to the core. 

-cyrus lets tj know that he likes him too and they start dating. they definitely keep it a secret from the ghc for a while, probably until the midseason finale. maybe jonah finds out first and that’s how cyrus comes out to him and tells him that he used to have a crush on him too. jonah is flattered and cool w/ it. anyway at first tj doesn’t like going on rly public dates with cyrus, not bc he’s ashamed of him or anything, but bc he doesn’t want anyone to make fun of cyrus (he can take ugly remarks but he’d hulk out if anyone touched a hair on cyrus’ head). cyrus doesn’t care tho and the one time they go on a date, some kids from tj’s school (he’d be in high school by season 3 right?) start messing with them. tj does in fact hulk out but only when one of the demons says something about cyrus. cyrus hauls tj off the creep and they talk in private about not wanting to live in fear but also not wanting to get harassed everywhere they go. when cy tells andi, she tells them that maybe they’d be safer if they went on double dates with her and walker, and so that’s a thing and its cute

The Juffy Plot

-anyway by the season 3b, both wandi and tyrus are thriving. they all hang out a lot leaving buffy to feel like a fifth wheel. she hides it tho bc does she ever express her feelings? she soon finds out that jonah is feeling the same way, and he thinks andi and cyrus don’t rly want to hang out with him anymore. buffy starts inviting jonah to all their outings and anytime the two couples are on a double date or something, buffy and jonah decide to do something else together on their own. cyrus takes note of this and tries to push buffy to ask jonah out since they’re practically dating already but she refuses bc he’s still andi’s ex and that violates girl code or w/e. 

-she goes to bex for advice! but she uses a hypothetical situation instead and changes names. bex, unaware that she’s telling buffy to go after her daughter’s ex, tells her to follow her heart but keep it a secret. meanwhile, jonah is slowly but surely realizing his feelings for buffy, and goes to bowie for advice. bc jonah’s a fool, he doesn’t know buffy has any feelings for him whatsoever, and he asks bowie how he can make her see him That Way. bowie, recycling ideas, tells him to perform a song for her but to do it as if he was just practicing and wanted to see if she thought it was a good song. jonah also doesn’t tell bowie that this is all for buffy lol. 

-so jonah invites buffy to the record store to hang out while wandi and tyrus are doing wandi and tyrus things. he plays some song for her (chemistry perhaps?? i still haven’t heard it yet but if its as good as y’all say...) and buffy is all heart eyes!! until she assumes that he wrote that song for another girl. there’s more unnecessary tiptoeing and drama for an episode until jonah notices that there’s something Up with buffy (she started avoiding him) and demands to know what’s going on. she doesn’t feel like talking about fEeLiNgS so instead he challenges her to arm wrestle. if she wins, she has to fess up. buffy’s like “um?? so all I have to do is let you win” but jonah’s like “like you would ever do that lmao”. she almost lets him win but bc he starts taunting she slams his mf arm into the table!! she fesses up and jonah’s like :D bc duh bitch that song was for you this whole time. they keep it a secret bc of bex’s foolish advice but eventually cyrus finds out and tells them to tell andi. andi’s upset at first but she gets over it. the three couples live in harmony 

The High School Plot

-we see more of the high school now that jonah (and tj?? unless he has to repeat a grade which is seeming likely actually) are there. jonah, who’s used to being the big man on campus, gets bullied for liking frisbee so much and is shamed into doing a “real sport” instead. he hates it and is miserable. he puts on a good face for the ghc bc he doesn’t want them to know he’s struggling. it eventually all comes crashing down when he has another panic attack (the first one in a while after starting therapy WHICH HE BETTER). also we get a look at his home life, I hc that he’s adopted and has a lot of foster siblings that have a lot of their own issues, so he constantly downplays his own bc he doesn’t want to be a “burden” and be abandoned again

-amber becomes a part of the crew and hopefully maybe just maybe is a lesbian. she starts hanging out with a bunch of sapphic baddies. she and jonah become friends and they help each other with their respective mental illnesses 

-through jonah, buffy makes friends with the high school track lesbians <3 they adopt her. one of them tho is Evil and is jealous that some middle schooler is getting all of this attention from the captain so she tries to break buffy’s fucking leg akjhskjdhds I told y’all this was melodramatic 

das it. disney you can send my paycheck to [redacted] within 10-12 business days.

[eventuallyfall-blog]

13 Envelopes

pairing: reader x lin summary: After graduating from UCLA, you would find any way to escape having to go back home. Lucky for you, your Aunt Jasmine Cephas Jones had organized a way for you to have the adventure you’d never gotten to have before. You’re ready to take her up on the offer. warnings: rpf (naturally), mentions of teen pregnancy, swearing a/n: i was tryin to post this august 6th but then i had a hard time writing thru it bc i made myself sad with my writing because that’s a thing i do i guess. anyway let’s get crackin tagged: @defenestrate-yourself-please@justabravelittleblogger @decayingtrash @andschuyler @linslovelylocks @sarahgurl09 @artofnerdom

(part 1) (part 2) (part 3) (part 4)

Ever since the date, you had been utterly giddy. You were suddenly extremely grateful that your Aunt Jasmine had decided to shove you to asking someone out. It was like you were walking on air, actually. “So wait, he actually kissed you?” “For the last time, Pippa, yes,” you said with the widest grin as you remembered the feel of his lips against yours. It'd been ages since you and Pippa had gotten to hang out. Right now, Pippa and you had made tea and decided to catch up on the couch. “I mean, you knew Aunt Jas was going to make me ask someone out, though? You couldn't have warned me?”

Pippa laughed, shaking her head. “Your aunt really wanted everything in the envelopes to be a surprise so no, I couldn't,” she said with a grin. “Besides, I only knew the contents of that one letter because she mentioned that you were still single and she felt that you should be going on dates and what not. I think she did you a favor. From the way you and Lin were acting, the two of you would've danced around asking the other out until someone else asked you out and end up married to someone else. Which is what happened with this other girl he liked a few years back.”

“Really,” you said with your eyebrows going up. “So then it sounds like Lin also owes Jas a thank you and not just me.”

“Oh for sure,” she said with a giggle, leaning back with a bright grin. “You're a catch! I mean, you are so pretty and smart. Exactly his type, funnily enough. Which it turns out that's also Michael's type.”

“Who the fuck is Michael?”

“The guy the girl he liked ended up with,” she explained as she finished off her tea and stood up. “Lin was bitter about it for a while there, but I think he's getting over it. Oh, you should open the next letter. I wanna know what letter five is all about.”

Envelope five had a small drawing of a girl that looked vaguely familiar. It took a minute before you realized it was your mother, age twenty-seven. She hadn't looked that vibrant and glowing in years. It was like life had started to suck the life out of her. You didn't realize that Aunt Jasmine remembered how your mom looked back then. Normally you discarded the envelopes but you set this one down with the intention of keeping it.

Honey bun,

Sometimes life doesn't have direction. When I was born, Anya was already fifteen and a full fledged teenager. Our dad and her mom had split ages ago – shortly after Anya was born, actually. Dad was only nineteen when your mom was born and her mother was only eighteen. Instead of taking responsibility and staying with dad, she split. He knew that relationships when you're a teenager aren't meant to last. He was worried that Anya's relationship wouldn't make it despite your existence and that she'd be left with little to nothing. Honestly, what I admire most about Anya and your father is that they still went to college and took care of you. It wasn't an easy task and I'm not sure you remember them being on food stamps and living in a crappy married couples dorm in Stanford.

They made it work, though. Stanford saw the happiest years of your parents' lives because there's something about being in school that made it easier. They had a roof over their heads, they had a schedule. It all fell apart upon graduation – which you probably don't remember well. I barely remember it myself. The only reason I know is because my dad told me about how he'd been surprised how steady their relationship was while he and my mom were raising me. I think when I turned ten is when your mother decided she didn't want to see him and my mom together anymore but I still wanted to see you and her. So I started visiting California on my own on dad's dime with his blessing.

Relationships are a tricky thing to explain, actually. It's the sort of thing that can feel like you're spinning rapidly out of control and it's easy to ditch them once it starts getting too serious. When you've got dreams, it's easy to see love itself as a baggage. That's how I once thought of love, anyway. Neither your mother nor I had any real model of healthy relationships. I think it might be why your mother is so defensive of her relationship with your father. It's... real. Or real enough, really. I think once you've spent twenty-eight years with someone, it becomes harder to say this isn't working. You don't want to throw away all those years together. Especially when you can say you'd been together since high school.

See, your mother doesn't hear criticism well, especially since dad's been trying to get her out of that relationship since before you were born. Which is the only reason I was okay with the relationship, I think. It made me an aunt to you. You're the greatest thing to come out of that relationship. And honestly, this is why envelope five is a wild card – you get to decide what you need to do. You can open envelope six whenever you feel it's appropriate.

All my love, Aunt Jas

There was no answers to this. You couldn't tell what the appropriate time to open envelope six was. For some reason, right after reading this letter didn't feel like the right time. You tucked away the sixth envelope in your purse, figuring that the perfect moment would hit you eventually. You already knew your family had been a bit screwed up – it was obvious to anyone. Between the fact your aunt was barely two years older than and you being the product of a teenage pregnancy and your mother somehow also being the product of teenage pregnancy (you wondered what the odds on that happening were), there was too much to your family that you didn't want to go into. In fact, when Lin specifically asked about your family during the date you went out of your way to focus exclusively on Aunt Jasmine. It had just been easier at the time.

You talked about how before Aunt Jasmine turned 15, she had stayed in your room during summer vacations and how when she was 15 she started staying in fancy hotels under her dad's name. How she was the one who helped you picked out your homecoming dress freshman and sophomore year and how lost you felt when she wasn't there to help after. You danced around why she stopped showing up and merely mentioned being surprised at the contact she'd made two years ago. For some reason, it felt like luck that you hadn't opened the envelopes until now. While you were certain this trip would've been just as amazing two years ago, it felt like a crescendo in your life. Like this was the drum roll, leading up to something important that you've yet to figure out.

Maybe you were investing too much stock in these envelopes your aunt gave you. Maybe the goal wasn't to figure your life out. After all, you'd only been 22 when the letters arrived. There's no way it was as simple as “help you figure your life out”. Whatever was going on, you figured a breather from the envelopes would help you sort out what you needed to do next. What you needed was something to clear your head. Some space away from them, something that would take you away from the right now.

The answer of what you needed to do next was see the Museum of Natural History. You weren't certain how your mind connected the need for distance from the now to history. Perhaps it had been on your mind a lot due to your recent conversations with Lin. He texted you almost every day now, telling you how he couldn't wait to see you again. It was nice to see his name flash across your phone screen with your heart racing every time, even as you were swiping on the blood red of Vampira from Kat Von D. You texted Lin, asking him to send your aunt to meet you at the Museum of Natural History. A slight grin appeared on your face as he texted back with your aunt's number and that he'll let her know you'd like to see her.

It was then that you realized that you never told your aunt that you had bought a laptop and phone in New York City. You supposed you should probably let her know that you had done that and explain that you figured that you'd be staying in New York City for a while. It'd already been almost a month, you realized with a start. How long where you going to stay? You weren't even halfway through the envelopes and it's already taken almost a month to get through them. It was then that you started to calculate out how long it'd been. You arrived June 20 – a week after graduating. It was now July 18 – in two days it would be a month. Suddenly you wondered if you should be getting through the envelopes faster.

You were grinning when your aunt showed up. Here was the thing about your aunt: you always felt like she was so much prettier than you. It was just since the two of you were so close in age it seemed like you and her should have bloomed at the same time. However, when Jasmine bloomed, you... didn't. Jasmine got the attention from the boys and at one point over the summer, a crush you'd had all summer long ended up trying to get your aunt Jasmine's number. It was demoralizing to have your aunt get the guy you liked, to say the least. That was when your self confidence was definitely at its lowest.

Right now was no exception either. It was why you were still surprised that Lin showed an interest in you over your aunt – who was older (and a gap between 35 and 26 was far less insane than the gap between 35 and 24), with lighter skin and with far more control over her own curls, and far more knowledgeable about theater than you. Looking at her now, it was hard to believe this was the same woman you had once shared baths with at age five and harder still to believe that someone would actually chose you over her. She threw her arms around you, a big grin on her face. “Let's go look at some dinosaur bones.”

Dinosaur bones wasn't exactly what you had in mind – you'd really wanted to see the planetarium. You figured maybe there was a chance the two of you could do both. Some time to see dinosaurs and stars. While logically, you knew museums like this existed all over the country something about New York City made it feel different. It was that feeling again; that feeling that felt like you'd been struck by lightening and were unable to put the flames out. “And maybe some stars later?”

Jasmine laughed slightly – you weren't sure if it was because of your predictability or because she was laughing at you. You took the favorable option. “You want to look at the observatory, huh?”

And for a while, everything went fine. Aunt Jasmine starting telling you the stories of backstage life, with you clinging to every word and realizing you'd never met the rest of the cast beyond Phillipa and Lin. “So when am I going to get to meet everyone else?”

“In due time, honey bun,” Jasmine said as she read the plaque for the giant set of bones that was in front of the two of you. “Pippa says you're the best roommate she's ever had. She comes home and you've already cleaned everything and have a hot meal waiting for her. Sounds incredibly domestic.”

You supposed domestic was the right word for it. You found yourself settling more into Pippa's apartment over the past month. A week after arriving, you'd hung your clothes up in the closet. Two weeks after, you starting writing your own events you needed to get to on the big whiteboard that Pippa had hanging up in the kitchen. Three days ago, you paid for groceries in the place after you'd run out of chicken. You hadn't realized how quickly you slipped into treating Pippa's apartment like “home”. “I suppose it's just cause I can't do anything without a clear head. Cleaning helps.”

“You'd always been a neat freak,” Jasmine said with a sly grin on her face. “Whenever you'd come over to my hotel, you'd yell at me over leaving my clothes everywhere. Renee and Pip do the same thing in the dressing room. Well not yell... more like sternly talk to me about how it's a shared space.”

Jasmine was right – she'd always been messy and you'd always been the clean one. Cleaning up after everyone else's mess, the same way you always had chosen the clear cut path rather than taking risks. It had been the biggest opposition between you and aunt Jasmine. She was messy, a risk taker, the one who broke the rules. You were clean, the steady course, the one who abode by every rule. Even your notebooks told this – clean, neat, elegant notes. Everything laid out neatly in stark contrast with Jasmine. Her lighter but somehow messier. “You probably might need my help,” you teased. “I'm willing to come look at previews any time.”

“Oh no you don't,” she said, her eyes going wide. “Pippa insists you need to get the full experience opening night. Star studded VIP treatment and all that. I kinda agree with her.”

You shrugged, figuring at least you could find out how much 128 gigabytes really could store when it came to pictures. It did go against the spirit of the trip, but since it was starting to feel more like it'd be months before you returned back to reality... you wanted a way to call your mother is what you told yourself. You missed home. But you knew that it was all because you wanted a way to keep in contact with those you'd met in New York City. “Pippa likes to be bossy, doesn't she?”

And then your phone went off. The loud ringing meant it was probably Lin – either texting you or calling you. And then you saw Jasmine's face – you'd never seen that look on her face. Her lips had parted and her eyes just had a hint of something that looked... like hurt. The only time you'd ever seen her seem hurt is when your mother had told her that she was too young to understand her. “You brought your phone? On the trip where I said don’t bring your phone?”

Logically, you knew you didn't have to explain yourself if you had brought your phone with you. You knew that you were an adult and she couldn't prevent you from. But you didn't like how vulnerable Jasmine looked. Your aunt wasn't a vulnerable person. So instead of the 'so what if I had' answer on the tip of your tongue, you said instead, “No, I bought a new phone. The instructions didn't say I couldn't buy new electronics.”

“It was... implied,” Jasmine said, briskly starting to walk away from you. And your heart sank. You chased after her, calling her name until she spun around, clearly upset. “You just... you violated the spirit of the adventure!”

You sputtered in response. “The spirit of the adventure,” you said, seeing red. “We haven't spoken in almost ten years! And the first thing I get from you is ditch your phone and your entire life in Los Angeles to come hang out in New York City! We were like sisters growing up but here we are and I had no idea you were making a Broadway debut!”

Jasmine looked hurt by this. “At the time when I sent those, I didn't know I'd be making a debut on Broadway,” she said, folding her arms over her chest and pulling away. You knew that this was probably a point where you could apologize and everything would be fine and the two of you could go off the planetarium but the logic had checked out for the day. “What about you, huh? You took two years to even get around to this! It was supposed to be a graduation gift!”

“Graduation gift,” you said incredulously, shaking your head. “A better graduation gift would have been actually coming to my commencement ceremony. But you weren't there. You had... three separate tries at now! High school graduation – where were you? Not there! Bachelor's? Not there! Masters? Nope! I had to find out through your cast mates that you even knew that I had gotten my masters!” You paused, realizing by the look on her face that you had touched a nerve. “I'm flying back to LA. Tonight.”

And you stormed off with aunt Jasmine making no attempt to stop you from leaving. Yet when you arrived at Pippa's apartment with the intent of going back to Los Angeles and forgetting about the rest of the envelopes, your phone buzzed yet again. Lin's name flashed across your phone and the ticket Pippa promised to get you for the premiere of Hamilton caught your eye – sitting right there on the bedside table. The silver dress you planned to wear to the event was hanging on the door. And then the realization came that you couldn't leave. You had to see this thing through. So there was only one option you could really feel comfortable with: you dialed a number on your phone and through your tears, you managed to get out, “Can we hang out later?”

[fuckyeahincubus]

How Incubus Got Their Groove Back

Incubus recently released their new single, “Nimble Bastard,” from their forthcoming album 8, due April 21. The album is the band’s first full-length in five years and you can feel how the break has rejuvenated the long-running Southern California quintet.

Propelled by producer Dave Sardy, an impromptu collaboration with Skrillex on “Familiar Faces” that came about from their friendship -- Skrillex was just in the studio and decided to work on the song --  and the love they are receiving from their new label, Island, Incubus have delivered a monster rock record, one they cannot wait to take on tour this year with Jimmy Eat World.

I have known the Incubus guys for years and over the past few years Monica Molinaro and I have been fortunate to have several in-depth conversations with frontman Brandon Boyd. So when we jump on the phone with him the day after the Grammys it is like reconvening with an old friend. In that spirit he opened up immensely on the state of the band, how Sardy pushed him, Beyonce and how he finds it best to write political songs in these crazy times.

Steve Baltin: How is it to go back into the Incubus machine after focusing on your artwork?

Brandon Boyd: It helps to have the might of a major label pushing a project and also, being super behind us too.  We haven’t experienced this kind of enthusiasm from a record label in a long time, which is so heartwarming just because we put everything we have into what we do.

Baltin: It definitely feels like this record had a thematic element. Did you notice that?

Boyd: I’ve really only, in the past couple of months, started to pick up on a couple of these things. It will be some time before a larger, more cohesive unifying theme reveals itself to me. But some of the themes that have come up, some of the thru-lines, are around aging, obsolescence, themes around paranoia that I’m picking up on, noticing patterns that have been repeated where you’re sort of waking up from repeated patterns, whether psychological or emotional patterns, attempting to want to break them perhaps and the sort of scariness and also the excitement of trying something brand new.

Monica Molinaro: What was exciting to me in listening to the album was sensing some frustration. It gave a great energy to your vocals and the guitar and bass parts really stuck out to me too.

Mikey and Ben came into full Mikey and Ben formation when we were writing this. Everything Mikey showed was like, “Check this out,” all these boner riffs. It was fun to hear what they kept coming up with over and over again. I think if anything the process of writing this album was probably the hardest on me because what I was going through in my personal space, but also Dave Sardy, who produced the record, did not take it easy on me as a singer and lyricist. He was like, “Yeah, you’re awesome, man, but try that again and how about again and again and one more time.” We just chipped away at it until it was as awesome as it could be. But I’m actually really happy with how it ended up, so hopefully our fans will feel the same way.

Baltin: Do you feel like you also have more of an appreciation for this period of creativity having gone through ups and downs?

Boyd: Mikey and I have been talking a lot about it in the past few weeks as we’ve been finishing the record and talking to people a little bit about it and playing it for some close, trusted friends and that’s really where we keep landing, like, “Holy s**t, we have been a band for 26 years and we’re still in love with the process of making album.” As difficult as it can be sometimes it still, at the end of the day, brings a level of joy and creative satisfaction. I’m certain that the challenge inherent in writing music and writing original music and hopefully writing innovative music is something that keeps us coming back to the table.

Baltin: What did you learn about yourself from this album?

Boyd: Working with Dave, he really, really challenged me. I love this dude to the end of the earth, but I would come to the studio and be like, “I did it, check it out, I got this badass chorus.” I’d sing it, lay it down and then go in the studio like, “Check it out, it’s cool, right?” He’d be like, “Hmm, no, I just…” He was just not there with me. And he kept reminding me, “I’m one of your biggest fans, Incubus has meant a lot to me over the years. So I’m coming at producing this album like I am a super fan who gets to finally produce an Incubus record. And I am not letting you get away with anything that’s not amazing.” So, on paper, it’s like, “Right on, man, that’s a great idea.” But the reality of it was holy s**t, he was hard on me. He did not let me sleep on any part. I did every part like a hundred times and he would kind of like brutalize my voice to the point where I would start to lose it towards the end of the day and he’d be like, “Just one more.” Then that was the one he would use. You can hear the strain in my voice on this album. As far as I can tell it’s never really been there. It sounds kind of cool cause he was able to unearth another layer of my voice as a singer. I think it’s a really good producing ethos for any band or artist coming up, work with a producer who knows what you’ve done thus far and has really enjoyed it, but also has really unrealistically high hopes for what you can still achieve.

Molinaro: When you talked about stretching your vocals it made me think of the Beyonce song “Sandcastles,” where she cracks in it. It’s like heart wrenching and it makes you more invested in the music because you can tell it’s really special and meaningful to them.

Boyd: Yeah, there’s something to that. I just heard the song today funnily enough and I heard the same thing. I was like, “Wow, I’ve never heard Beyonce kind of crack, I’ve never heard the grumble in her voice before and it makes me like her more.” It’s interesting because we live in this time of incredible technologies where any person can go into a recording studio and go, “Ah, ah” into a microphone and a producer can turn that into a hit song. So there’s something fascinating about that, but there’s also something that’s lost in that, where we have to remind ourselves sometimes we’re human beings with instruments and we’re making sounds out of nothing. I think that’s something that Dave helped us chip away at hopefully on this record and hopefully our listeners hear the album and pick up on that.

Molinaro: Were there other collaborations or partnerships that were influential to this work besides the Skrillex one?

Boyd: Off the top of my head, no. We’re mostly very insular and mostly everything is in house, kind like a music factory, but also the art and the videos, so it’s all kind of in our close creative family. Maybe it can be limiting sometimes, so we’re always open to inviting new people into our weird polyamorous cult that we have. But, for the most part, it was just us in the man cave creating music.

Molinaro: And was it important to incorporate your thoughts in this political climate?

Boyd: It is definitely one of the most interesting times politically and socially, interesting being the operative term or lack of a better term. I feel like the kind of creative sentiments that are going to be the most beneficial are the ones that are a little bit more lovingly subversive. Yes, there’s the need for open protests, like go into the streets protest. I did the women’s march downtown, it was one of the most beautiful afternoons I’ve ever spent in my city here. I was so proud of Los Angeles, I was so proud that many people could peacefully gather and walk in the streets in opposition to so much of what the coming administration stands for. But, from my point of view, I feel like the types of ideas that are going to be the most lovingly effective and lasting are the ones that people don’t even realize they’re being infected with. So people in Trump country are like, “I love this song.” And they’ll be infected with this kind of west coast ethos.

Baltin: Talk about this tour with Jimmy Eat World, how that pairing came about and what you look for in bands you tour with.

Boyd: You can usually get a sense of that by the kind of music that people are making. I don’t know the guys in Jimmy Eat World very well, I’ve met most of them like in passing. But they’ve always seemed like really rad, genuine dudes that I do very much like their music and I know that they also are doing very well with their new album. So it’s cool, we’ll piggyback with other bands like we did with the Deftones. They were planning on being on tour and we were going on tour so it was like, “Hey, let’s go tandem together forever.”

[myincubusupdate]

How Incubus Got Their Groove Back Steve Baltin , CONTRIBUTOR I write about music and the business of music. Incubus recently released their new single, “Nimble Bastard,” from their forthcoming album 8, due April 21. The album is the band’s first full-length in five years and you can feel how the break has rejuvenated the long-running Southern California quintet. Propelled by producer Dave Sardy, an impromptu collaboration with Skrillex on “Familiar Faces” that came about from their friendship -- Skrillex was just in the studio and decided to work on the song -- and the love they are receiving from their new label, Island, Incubus have delivered a monster rock record, one they cannot wait to take on tour this year with Jimmy Eat World. I have known the Incubus guys for years and over the past few years Monica Molinaro and I have been fortunate to have several in-depth conversations with frontman Brandon Boyd. So when we jump on the phone with him the day after the Grammys it is like reconvening with an old friend. In that spirit he opened up immensely on the state of the band, how Sardy pushed him, Beyonce and how he finds it best to write political songs in these crazy times. Steve Baltin: How is it to go back into the Incubus machine after focusing on your artwork? Brandon Boyd: It helps to have the might of a major label pushing a project and also, being super behind us too. We haven’t experienced this kind of enthusiasm from a record label in a long time, which is so heartwarming just because we put everything we have into what we do. Baltin: It definitely feels like this record had a thematic element. Did you notice that? Boyd: I’ve really only, in the past couple of months, started to pick up on a couple of these things. It will be some time before a larger, more cohesive unifying theme reveals itself to me. But some of the themes that have come up, some of the thru-lines, are around aging, obsolescence, themes around paranoia that I’m picking up on, noticing patterns that have been repeated where you’re sort of waking up from repeated patterns, whether psychological or emotional patterns, attempting to want to break them perhaps and the sort of scariness and also the excitement of trying something brand new. Monica Molinaro: What was exciting to me in listening to the album was sensing some frustration. It gave a great energy to your vocals and the guitar and bass parts really stuck out to me too. Mikey and Ben came into full Mikey and Ben formation when we were writing this. Everything Mikey showed was like, “Check this out,” all these boner riffs. It was fun to hear what they kept coming up with over and over again. I think if anything the process of writing this album was probably the hardest on me because what I was going through in my personal space, but also Dave Sardy, who produced the record, did not take it easy on me as a singer and lyricist. He was like, “Yeah, you’re awesome, man, but try that again and how about again and again and one more time.” We just chipped away at it until it was as awesome as it could be. But I’m actually really happy with how it ended up, so hopefully our fans will feel the same way. Baltin: Do you feel like you also have more of an appreciation for this period of creativity having gone through ups and downs? Boyd: Mikey and I have been talking a lot about it in the past few weeks as we’ve been finishing the record and talking to people a little bit about it and playing it for some close, trusted friends and that’s really where we keep landing, like, “Holy s**t, we have been a band for 26 years and we’re still in love with the process of making album.” As difficult as it can be sometimes it still, at the end of the day, brings a level of joy and creative satisfaction. I’m certain that the challenge inherent in writing music and writing original music and hopefully writing innovative music is something that keeps us coming back to the table. Baltin: What did you learn about yourself from this album? Boyd: Working with Dave, he really, really challenged me. I love this dude to the end of the earth, but I would come to the studio and be like, “I did it, check it out, I got this badass chorus.” I’d sing it, lay it down and then go in the studio like, “Check it out, it’s cool, right?” He’d be like, “Hmm, no, I just…” He was just not there with me. And he kept reminding me, “I’m one of your biggest fans, Incubus has meant a lot to me over the years. So I’m coming at producing this album like I am a super fan who gets to finally produce an Incubus record. And I am not letting you get away with anything that’s not amazing.” So, on paper, it’s like, “Right on, man, that’s a great idea.” But the reality of it was holy s**t, he was hard on me. He did not let me sleep on any part. I did every part like a hundred times and he would kind of like brutalize my voice to the point where I would start to lose it towards the end of the day and he’d be like, “Just one more.” Then that was the one he would use. You can hear the strain in my voice on this album. As far as I can tell it’s never really been there. It sounds kind of cool cause he was able to unearth another layer of my voice as a singer. I think it’s a really good producing ethos for any band or artist coming up, work with a producer who knows what you’ve done thus far and has really enjoyed it, but also has really unrealistically high hopes for what you can still achieve. Molinaro: When you talked about stretching your vocals it made me think of the Beyonce song “Sandcastles,” where she cracks in it. It’s like heart wrenching and it makes you more invested in the music because you can tell it’s really special and meaningful to them. Boyd: Yeah, there’s something to that. I just heard the song today funnily enough and I heard the same thing. I was like, “Wow, I’ve never heard Beyonce kind of crack, I’ve never heard the grumble in her voice before and it makes me like her more.” It’s interesting because we live in this time of incredible technologies where any person can go into a recording studio and go, “Ah, ah” into a microphone and a producer can turn that into a hit song. So there’s something fascinating about that, but there’s also something that’s lost in that, where we have to remind ourselves sometimes we’re human beings with instruments and we’re making sounds out of nothing. I think that’s something that Dave helped us chip away at hopefully on this record and hopefully our listeners hear the album and pick up on that. Molinaro: Were there other collaborations or partnerships that were influential to this work besides the Skrillex one? Boyd: Off the top of my head, no. We’re mostly very insular and mostly everything is in house, kind like a music factory, but also the art and the videos, so it’s all kind of in our close creative family. Maybe it can be limiting sometimes, so we’re always open to inviting new people into our weird polyamorous cult that we have. But, for the most part, it was just us in the man cave creating music. Molinaro: And was it important to incorporate your thoughts in this political climate? Boyd: It is definitely one of the most interesting times politically and socially, interesting being the operative term or lack of a better term. I feel like the kind of creative sentiments that are going to be the most beneficial are the ones that are a little bit more lovingly subversive. Yes, there’s the need for open protests, like go into the streets protest. I did the women’s march downtown, it was one of the most beautiful afternoons I’ve ever spent in my city here. I was so proud of Los Angeles, I was so proud that many people could peacefully gather and walk in the streets in opposition to so much of what the coming administration stands for. But, from my point of view, I feel like the types of ideas that are going to be the most lovingly effective and lasting are the ones that people don’t even realize they’re being infected with. So people in Trump country are like, “I love this song.” And they’ll be infected with this kind of west coast ethos. Baltin: Talk about this tour with Jimmy Eat World, how that pairing came about and what you look for in bands you tour with. Boyd: You can usually get a sense of that by the kind of music that people are making. I don’t know the guys in Jimmy Eat World very well, I’ve met most of them like in passing. But they’ve always seemed like really rad, genuine dudes that I do very much like their music and I know that they also are doing very well with their new album. So it’s cool, we’ll piggyback with other bands like we did with the Deftones. They were planning on being on tour and we were going on tour so it was like, “Hey, let’s go tandem together forever.”