#they invented romance I don't make the rules

[mrsreginagold]

Fic: A Funny Thing That I Cannot Explain

Fandom: Nikita

Pairing: Ari Tasarov x Nikita Mears (Nikari)

Rating: R

Spoilers: Canon-divergent AU, would take place sometime during the second season. 

Summary: Nikita discovers that the more time she spends in Ari’s company, the more she wishes for it to never end. 

Author's note: I love them your honor.

On AO3

A Funny Thing That I Cannot Explain

                  Nikita Mears winced when far too bright illumination hit her directly in the face and an evening of incredibly bad choices decided to remind her of its existence.

                  Her head was pounding, and she felt sore all over. Groaning, she clung tightly to the pillow in her arms while burying her head further into the plush fabric. “Kill me.”

                  “Where would the fun be in that?”

                  She shot up abruptly at the sound of a familiar, deep, and incredibly alluring male voice. 

                  Ari Tasarov merely peered over the rims of his reading glasses and lowered the book he was holding a fraction. 

                  Unable to help it, Nikita gaped at the image he made beside her. His dark hair was tousled attractively, and his exquisitely defined torso was on full display since he was shirtless with the bedsheets pooled around his waist. 

                  Her heart thundered as she glanced down, relieved to see that she was covered, but frowning when she realized that it was by one of his dress shirts. 

                  She inhaled shakily before asking, her voice unsteady. “What happened last night?”

                  There was a rustle of fabric and then a feather-light brush of fingers against her arm. “You don’t remember?”

                  She glanced over at him, pulse jumping when she saw him stretching languidly before resting on his side. He propped up on one elbow, so they were face-to face, and brought his hand up for a gentle caress along her cheek, which caused her breath to catch.

                  “The room probably needs to stop spinning before I can,” she admitted with a hard swallow, resisting the urge to reach out and trail her nails through the hair that dusted the broad expanse of his chest.

                  His lips curved into a slightly wicked smile, as if he knew exactly what direction her thoughts had headed. “I suppose I’ll just have to remind you myself.”

                  His proximity and her addled mind made it very difficult to focus.  Ari’s eyes were a stunning mix of blue and gray, framed by eyelashes that could make other women jealous. They were arguably his best feature, though the rest of him was just as appealing. 

                  Not helping matters was the fact that he was observing her so intently, and it was taking every ounce of her self-control to not pounce. 

                  She was seconds away from having a full-blown crisis, tempted to pull him to her and claim that soft-looking mouth in a kiss, but reason demanded that she know the extent of their current intimacy. “Ari, just answer me one question honestly.”

                  “What’s that?”

                  Nikita took a sharp breath. “Did we have sex or not?”

                  “Call me old-fashioned, but it’s definitely not standard practice to make love to someone who is unconscious.”

                  Relief was the primary response she felt to his answer, though it was tinged with some disappointment as well. “I was unconscious?” 

                  “To be fair, you had consumed quite a large portion of alcohol. I didn’t realize cocktails were so dangerous.”

                  With an embarrassed sound, she flopped with minimal grace onto her back and stared up at the ceiling. “I don’t know why you put up with me. I swear you have the patience of a saint…though. Wait a minute,” she furrowed her brow and looked at him. “If nothing happened, why are you naked?”

                  He flipped the bedsheets back to reveal he was wearing pajama pants. “Not completely.”

                  “You didn’t answer the question.”

                  Ari shrugged and got out of bed – running his hands through his hair and smoothing it away from his face. “Maybe I wanted to see how you’d react. Or maybe it was because someone barged into my bedroom, took off most of her clothes, and I needed to cover her up.”

                  “The second part sounds more likely, and more humiliating,” she threw one arm over her eyes, her pretty features flushing considerably. “Could I ask you one more thing?”

                  “Of course,” she heard him rummaging around. 

                  “Help me to the bathroom? I want to freshen up but I’m worried that I’ll get sick if I move too quickly.”

                  He turned back around from where he had been messing with the room’s coffee maker, his expression softening at noticing her distressed one. “Sure.”

                  Ari’s method of helping, apparently, was to bridal carry her into the washroom. 

                  Nikita was torn between mortification and appreciation for this gesture. She found herself leaning towards the latter when he went to get her some fresh clothes. 

                  She took advantage of the privacy while he was out to brush her teeth and then started the shower. 

                  A brief respite in the warm water combined with some medicine for the hang-over was just what was needed to clear her head, and by the time she emerged, she saw that he had placed a new outfit for her on the counter. 

                  She was touched that he had respected her space despite the fact that she wouldn’t have minded if he had joined her. Quickly, she dressed and then wandered back out into the hotel room. 

                  Her companion had also changed and was now fully clothed in a simple white button-down, tucked into dark blue jeans. Both seemed to cling to his build in all the right ways, making color rush to her cheeks as she recalled just what lay beneath the fabric covering his chest. 

                  He was preoccupied with examining the contents of a room-service spread that was laid out on a roll out table, and if he had any inclination of how keenly she was checking him out, he didn’t show it. 

                  She cleared her throat to announce herself. “What’s all this?”

                  He looked over in her direction with a smirk. “I believe it’s referred to as breakfast.”

                  Nikita rolled her eyes. “I know that, but why go to the trouble?”

                  “Because, we don’t have to be back at our respective headquarters for another couple of days and I want to spend this one with you.”

                  Her heart flipped at the warm, inviting and completely sincere expression that lit up his handsome face. “Really?”

Ari bridged the distance between them and tucked a lock of hair back over her ear. “Really. We’re in Paris, Nikita. We should take advantage of it.”

                  The idea of exploring the most romantic city in the world with him had an appeal she couldn’t resist.

                  “One stipulation,” she inched closer.

                  “What’s that?”

                  “Just for today: we aren’t agents for rival organizations working together in secret. We’re normal. That’s what I want.”

                  “Very well, we’ll be an entirely normal couple,” he leaned in, nudging her nose with his. “On a completely normal date.”

                  “As long as that date starts with you kissing me because I’m about to lose my mind if you don’t.”

                  He grinned before doing exactly as she requested.

                  The kiss was tentative at first – a testing of the waters, so to speak – but any imaginings that Nikita might have had paled in comparison to the delicate sensation of Ari’s lips against hers. 

                  She relaxed into the embrace immediately and curled her arms around his neck to tug him closer, nipping playfully at his mouth to signal that he could be less careful if he wished. 

                  Skilled fingers weaved into the silk of her hair, the kiss deepening as they allowed months of pent-up emotion to take hold, teasing and tasting each other until they had to part in order to breathe. 

                  They stood there illuminated by the light pouring in through the room’s windows, foreheads touching, and eyes closed, unwilling to separate just yet. 

                  He was the first to break the silence, amusement lacing his tone: “We should eat before the food goes cold.”

                  “I’m half tempted to call the whole thing off and drag you back to bed,” she confessed with a nuzzle.

                  “Fun as that would be, I have plans for you that involve clothes,” he took a step back, though he twined their fingers together so he could lead her to the breakfast table. 

                  “Damn,” she half-joked, beaming when he gallantly pulled out a chair for her. “We’re in a country with nude beaches, so I thought we might have a work-around.”

                  He choked on his drink at her remark, which was a reward in and of itself. “That’s not what I had in mind.” he sputtered.

                  With a giggle, Nikita loaded up her plate with scrambled eggs, some croissants, and fresh fruit. She figured that whatever Ari was plotting, it would require energy. 

                  They fell into pleasant conversation while they ate and enjoyed their coffee, and when it was finally time to depart – they did so arm-in-arm. 

The life of a rogue operative was actually the furthest thing from glamorous, and though Nikita had traveled to many foreign countries, she had never been given the opportunity to explore. 

This was partially what drove her to dive fully into the guise of tourist, much to Ari’s delight. 

Their first stop of the day was to procure sunglasses – though her hangover had abated somewhat, the bright sun still hurt – and brochures to guide them through the famous landmarks. 

They perused shops, visited the Paris Opera House and the famous Notre Dame cathedral, and then had lunch at a quaint café. When the weather began to chill later in the afternoon, they ducked into a store to get jackets before they continued to the Eiffel Tower. 

The couple had an early dinner in the famous restaurant that overlooked the city, and finally took a romantic walk along the banks of the Seine. 

Though her feet hurt a bit from walking so much, and exhaustion was starting to seep in, Nikita was in bright spirits. “Today has been wonderful.”

“I’m glad.” Ari bumped her shoulder with his, pausing at a scenic vantage point on the bridge that they were crossing. “I know things haven’t been easy lately.”

“They haven’t.” She confirmed, referring to the ever-complicated battle to take down the organization that had turned her into a lethal weapon, for better or for worse. “Having you by my side certainly takes the edge off though.”

They stood close together and watched the sun dip into the horizon – appearing to disappear into the famous river. The sky above was awash in hues of red, pink, and orange, and she now understood why the song La Vie en Rose was so beloved. 

A flurry of emotion settled in her heart when she turned to gaze at her companion.       

There was no doubt that the man beside her was handsome, but the evening light cast a soft glow that befit the sharp angles of his face and made him irresistible in her eyes. 

Her heart began to beat rapidly. Instinctively, she reached out to touch him, only to falter when his gaze caught her own.

A quizzical look was directed her way. “What is it?”

“Do you ever wonder if we should just stop? Run away. Adopt new identities. Start a proper life?” The words came pouring out, and she blushed before ducking her head. “I mean…”

“What are you actually trying to say here, Nikita?” elegant fingers curled beneath her chin to tilt it back, so she was looking at him properly. 

Her breath hitched. His expression was utterly tender and full of affection but tempered by concern at her unexpected rambling. 

“I’m trying to say that I’m in love with you,” she declared. “I tried very, very hard not to fall for you because the life we lead is always uncertain, and I’m sorry but, I couldn’t help it.”

He shushed her and placed a palm against her cheek. “Don’t ever apologize for how you feel.” He leaned in and granted her a sweet kiss that seemed to calm the anxiety that had erupted unintentionally. 

Then – he said the words that would change everything. 

“I love you, Nikita. If you’ll have me, I’m yours.”

Tears sprung to her eyes, and she practically leapt into his waiting arms, stealing a far more passionate kiss. “As if I’d want to get rid of you. Let’s go back to the hotel.”

He smiled against her mouth. “Fine by me.”

                  Although she had been the one to suggest it, by the time they reached their destination: Nikita found herself dealing with a different case of nerves. 

                  The irony of them ending up back where they had started wasn’t entirely lost, and while she certainly wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of the night in Ari’s arms, she was also hesitant. After all – the man she loved had been utterly respectful in every sense of the word, mindful of her boundaries and putting her feelings ahead of his own. 

She followed him silently after they reached the floor they were staying on in the hotel, mulling over her insecurities when it came to the subject of intimacy. She was no virgin, but her few sexual encounters had been brief, to the point, and usually as part of a cover. The truth was she had never actually made love with someone besides the fiancé that she had lost, and that was some time ago. Nikita was certain that with Ari it was going to be about more than the physical act. 

“You’ve grown quiet,” her companion remarked, jolting her from the reverie. “Is something wrong?”

Her cheeks flared with color, and she shook her head. “Nothing’s wrong! I was just thinking.”

He turned around to face her, apprehension written on his striking features. “If you think we’re moving too fast, I’m fine with slowing down.”

“That’s not it.” She shook her head again and draped her arms over his shoulders. “I want this. I want you.” She kissed him lightly to prove her point. “But I also don’t have the greatest track record when it comes to relationships.”

“I wouldn’t say that” he leaned in, pressing his forehead to hers. “Earlier, you seemed to be doing just fine.”

“That’s because you’re the first man I’ve felt comfortable enough around to let my walls fall,” she confessed. “And I’m afraid of taking the next step and having things end up awkward between us after.”

“I’m honored that you trust me,” he murmured, nuzzling their noses together. “And I understand your trepidation. You’re also the first person I’ve wanted to be with in this way in some time.”

Her heart fluttered at the affection and his heartfelt admission. She leaned into him instinctively, emitting a quiet sigh. “I didn’t mean to ruin the mood by laying this on you so abruptly.”

“You’re not,” he whispered, pulling back just enough to look deeply into her eyes. “Nikita, the last thing I want is for you to ever feel uncomfortable. Whatever happens between the two of us needs to be mutual.”

At a loss for words, she nodded, her heart skipping when he offered her a gentle smile and another kiss that she gratefully returned. 

“So…what now?” she inquired.

“Now – we go into the room, and I draw you a bubble bath.”

She blinked, not expecting that answer. “A bubble bath?”

“You need to relax,” he elaborated, taking the room key out to unlock the door. “When was the last time you were pampered?”

“Never?” 

His response to that was to hoist her into his deceptively strong arms, lifting her effortlessly so he could carry her inside. “Now, that simply will not do.”

Though his action had momentarily startled her, Nikita was quick to wrap her arms securely around his neck. 

He toed off his shoes but didn’t let go of her once they were through the entry, pausing only so she could pull off her ankle boots, and then he carted her off to the bathroom. 

It was there that he set her down carefully on the small vanity chair, and she watched contentedly while he discarded his coat and then rolled up his shirt sleeves.

She cast aside her own jacket by draping it over the back of the chair as he tested the temperature of the water before letting the faucet run. 

A delicious strawberry scent filled the air after he added a few capfuls of shower gel to the bath. Then he rose and faced her, wiping his hands off with a spare washcloth. “I’ll leave you to it.”

“What?” confused, she snapped out of her trance-like state. “I thought you were going to join me.”

“I never said as much,” he chuckled, moving to her side, and brushing his lips against her temple. “However, if you decide that’s what you wish –I’m right outside.”

Stunned, she watched him exit the room and then returned her attention to the state of the bath. 

When it appeared to be more foam than water, she turned off the faucet and methodically began to undress, wondering just what kind of point her beloved was trying to prove. 

Surely it’s a test…he’s probably stretched out naked on the bed by now, waiting to see how desperate I’ll get.

Completely nude, she padded over to the door and cracked it open, peeking out cautiously. 

Ari was indeed stretched out on the bed, perusing a magazine, but had not removed one stitch of clothing. The only alterations were that he had undone several buttons on his collar and his sleeves remained rolled up. 

Blushing, she ducked back inside and hastily wrapped a towel around her body. Well. I read him wrong.

After a few more minutes of consideration, she realized that her embarrassment over the circumstance didn’t change the fact that she wanted him there with her.

She breathed in deeply to steady herself, quickly checked to ensure the bath wasn’t starting to chill, and then opened the door again so she could lean against the frame.

“Ari?” 

He looked up from reading, the crystalline blue of his eyes glittering with appreciation as they took in the sight of her. “Yes?”

She extended out one hand. “Please join me.”

                  He smiled and stood, his fingers entangling with hers seconds later. 

                  She coaxed him into the room, drawing him to her for a kiss while her hands worked to free him from his shirt.

                  The crisp fabric parted over his torso, and he rotated his shoulders in assistance so she could slip it down his arms. 

                  She pulled away from the kiss so she could stare at her leisure, her eyes roving over the sculpted contours of his chest and abdomen, and then lingering along the fine taper of his waist. The bright light of the bathroom should have been unforgiving, but being able to discern the bits of silver in his hair frankly made him more of a sensual picture than ever. 

                  Without preamble – she lunged, claiming his lips urgently and quickly removing the barriers that remained between his skin and hers. 

                  Strong arms circled around her protectively while they embraced, and she marveled over how right it felt to be with him. She could barely stop kissing or touching him long enough to steer them over to the tub, and she jolted in surprise when he scooped her up and did the work for her. 

                  They sank together into the bubbles, naked limbs entwining while they became lost in one another. 

                  “If you’d waited any longer, the water would have gone cold,” he remarked, tugging back to caress at her face.

                  “What can I say, I’m all about timing,” she smirked.

                  A playful grin was directed her way before he dipped his head and pressed several kisses to her throat, his tongue laving over her clavicle and then drifting further down. 

                  She tilted her neck back and reclined fully against the edge of the bathtub, her legs hooking over his waist under the water to keep him close as he continued in his explorations. 

                  Ari proved a generous lover: discovering paths along Nikita’s increasingly sensitized skin that he followed with both hands and mouth. 

                  Suds of strawberry-scented foam were eased aside to grant him better access as he worshipped her body in a manner that was downright intoxicating. Even the most feather-light brush of his fingers along the curve of her hip was enough to spark pleasant tingles, heat gathering at her core the longer his ministrations wore on. 

                  She idly wondered if he was drawing everything out on purpose, but then he finally joined them together with a fluid thrust and the world around her shattered. 

                  A whimper tore from her throat, and she gripped tightly to his biceps, her legs coiling around him to anchor them fully before they set off on a steady rhythm.

                  Their eyes met; raw emotion evident in the bright blue of his gaze that was mirrored in her own. As she’d suspected – this was about so much more than a physical attraction. 

                  Her heart thundered as they engaged in an intimate dance, damp skin causing delicious friction that led to inevitable surrender. 

                  His mouth found hers right as they reached completion, embracing wildly in a manner befitting their coupling until – at last – they were entirely sated. 

                  They stayed in the bath long enough for the water to turn cold, at which point Ari suggested that they finally switch to the more comfortable appearing bed. 

                  Nikita made no protests and was quick to join him in cleaning up around the tub, as their exertions had resulted in plenty of water splashing onto the floor. 

                  They wrapped themselves up in the comfortable, fluffy robes provided by the hotel and settled together on the mattress not long after. 

                  With a content sigh, she cuddled close and took his hand within hers, grazing her mouth lightly over his knuckles. “I want more days that are just like this.”

                  “I want to give them to you,” he admitted. “Were you serious earlier? About stopping?”

                  “Did you think I wasn’t?” she slung a leg over his.

                  He reached out with his free hand and tucked a lock of errant, still-drying hair back over her ear. “I just know that bringing Division down means a lot to you.”

                  “It did… I’m not so sure anymore.” She traced an invisible figure over the triangle of exposed skin revealed by the open collar of his robe. 

                  “Then let me rephrase that,” he leaned in to give her a languid, gentle kiss before murmuring. “What is it that you really want, Nikita?”

                  She searched his gaze, taken in by the honesty there, and knew to be sincere in return. After a moment of pondering his question, she answered. “I want to be happy, Ari. With you. With a life where I’m not constantly looking over my shoulder. What about you?”

                  “I want to be the one who makes you happy,” he confessed. “And I’m willing to do whatever it takes to ensure it.”

                  “I think I already knew that; I just wanted to hear you say it,” she smiled, stretching, and then twisting so she could pin him beneath her, hands fisting in the soft fabric covering his chest. “I also think we’ve taken a long enough break.”

                  There was a low, seductive sound on his part and then she was yanked into an ardent kiss that proved that there was nothing further to discuss for the time being. 

                  After all – the promise of a future was more than enough. 

The End

[wenellyb]

So-e was already wearing Se-jun's jacket when Se-jun held her hand in the helicopter😭

[autisticshadowthehedgehog]

you are allowed to break the "no romance in sonic" rule but only once. what ship do you make canon?

we invent a girlfriend for big the cat who is just big but a girl. i don't mean "big but sexualized" i mean she is just as tall if not taller, just as fat, just as fucking stupid, and just as obliviously feral. she's always caked in mud and lives in a swamp and collects giant bugs and never learned how to read

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - The unexpected rise of cooking crush & seme bjs

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Jan 2024 Wk 3

Ongoing Series - Thai

The Sign (Sat YT) ep 9 of 12 - I love this show so damn much. This may be my KinnPorsche. It’s just so endlessly entertaining in a perfectly unhinged way. I love that they looped Tharn’s dad back into the murder investigations.

You know kinksters have invented necklaces that can’t come off… right? Just saying.

Meanwhile, would it still be BL if our seme didn’t wake up from drowning and instantly go chase snake?

No. No it would not. 

Remember the one hard and fast rule of BL? When a seme gives a BJ it’s penance. Phaya is apologizing to Tharn for leaving him behind.

Heh. Hard and fast. I kill me. 

Pit Babe (Fri iQIYI) ep 10 of 14 - How is this absurd creature managing to rise in the ranks? Pavel turned in some stellar grief and ALANJEFF have my whole heart. I make Ikea puns in the... Trash watch happening here.

Cooking Crush (Sun YT) ep 7 of 12 - The make-out montage was absolutely charming and very much American rom com style - interesting (and rare) to see in a BL (not to mention from OffGun. How far we have come since Puppy Honey?)

Meanwhile, another wonderful grandma in a BL!

Next week we do an actual harken back to Puppy Honey, so obviously I’m now enjoying this whole show way more than before. I think it helped that I watched it earlier in the week, when it wasn’t competing with any other BLs. 

Last Twilight (Fri YT) ep 11 of 12 - Not gonna lie, I knew from you all that this was gonna be a rough ep. But I very clearly remember the penultimate Bad Buddy ep so I now have slightly more trust than others in GMMTV on this matter. 

That said, this was a crap episode.

You can’t set Mork’s truth and character motivation reveal up like that and then have his lover choose to dismiss him in a way that diminishes not just both character's growth AND all of Mork's actions towards Day, but also our faith in every other character. It was a shitty narrative thing to do to us, and it was a shitty thing to do to Mork. And that doesn’t even take into account the forgiveness allotted by the story to Day’s unrepentant excuse for a mother.  The doom should have been handled differently. The mom shoudl have leaned in even more evil and actively lied to split them apart.

I don't know if they can redeem this misstep in the final episode. But I'm interested to see them try. That said, this plot seem to be true to the book. 

For Him (Thurs iQIYI) ep 8 of 12 - A major trigger has landed. But also it’s clear who’s fault that incident was... and it’s not Him’s. So Blue's so-called-friend really is unhinged. This episode was a little bit more engaging than last week, but it’s only because stuff actually happened. I’m still not sure I enjoyed it. 

Twins the series (Fri GaGa) ep 12fin - Despite the fact that I’ve been annoyed by the show the last couple of episodes, I’m still sad for it to end. It was a good reveal and First had the right response. Also a very sports way to end it. Sprite is a v clingy bf. 

In brief?

A messy very Thai pulp sports romance that actually managed to involve sports in an identical twins trading-places plot. Basically Not Me meets HIStory 2 Crossing the Line (although vastly inferior to either) with an endearing main character and a good lead pair (poor things), both soapy and earnest without too much camp. It tried so hard but the plot, side couples, and extraneous characters let us down. Passable if not great. 7/10 

Time the series (Thai Gaga) ep 2 of 10 - Eh. Whatever. 

My Universe (Sun iQIYI) ep 22 of 24 - skipped this installment

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Although I Love You and You AKA Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka (Japan Gaga) ep 2 of 10 - Funny how quickly he retracted that confession and everyone called him out for doing it too soon (including me from a narrative beats perspective). It was a cute screw up - I see what your meta-arse is doing there, Japan. Also our Tokyo-boy’s serious reserved earnestness is extra adorable in the surrounded by Osaka enthusiasm context. His accidental flirting is that much more heart wrenching for our poor baby seme.  And they ended this ep with honorific negotiations!! Be still my heart. I’m really adoring this show.

Your hyung romance super fan is back in the game! 

Meanwhile the Osaka accent is beyond adorable. 

Sahara-sensei to Toki-kun (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 6 of 8 - Japan what are you doing? I do love the not-sorta-ex from the past. 

VIP Only (Taiwan Fri Gaga) ep 10fin - I loved all the young people in the hawker center supporting the campaign against the terrible mother. They make a good domestically sappy couple. But that is Taiwan's specialty.

In brief?

A sweet if aimless story about a writer and a chef finding love via noodles, fake dating, and family challenges. If it had a tighter script and a shorter run, more like a KBL this might’ve been quite special. But it didn’t and it lost me too many times. 6/10

I don’t like to be disappointed by Taiwan. 

It's done: I Need to Catch up

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - will binge when I have any spare time. 2024 is crazy busy for me so far.

The Servant and the Young Master - from Vietnam so I assume it's on YouTube. I never even noticed. Anyone?

Began Beginning (Myanmar YouTube) - Is TRUST Entertainment bringing us the first ever Burmeses BL? I don't know if it's really the first, but @heretherebedork vouched for it, so I will give it a watch through.

It's Airing But...

[INTERNATIONAL] Cherry Magic (Sat YouTube) ep 3 of 12 - yeah Japan put the smack down on our boys. Sadness. You can use a VPN if you like. Read all about it here.

Beside You (Thai YouTube) - a 3 sp short that's supposed to have started but I can't find it.

Ossans Love Season 2 (Japan Gaga) - 5 years later, will anything have changed? This is Japan so… probubly not. I won't be watching this. I disliked Season one and actively hated the follow ups. No thank you.

Playboyy (Thurs Gaga) 14 eps - Dear Playboyy, it's not you, it’s me… I hate you. You’re about as deep (and as palatable) as a shot glass of cum. While I'm sure you’re someone’s kink, you're my weakest link. Goodbye. I DNFed this at ep 5. Frankly I'm impressed with myself for getting that far.

The Whisperer (Sun ????) 10 eps - Ends next week. Thai horror BL that ALSO involves cheating (what joy is mine). I don't think even the perfect single dimple can motivate me to watch. Word is... it's terrible.

7 Days Before Valentine (Weds WeTV) 10 eps - Giving me Luminous Solution vibes. I'm waiting to binge if safe.

Dead Friend Forever (Thai Sat iQIYI) - horror, meh, tell me if it's worth my time?

In Case You Missed it

All my year-end round ups:

TOP 10 BL Trends of 2023

Top 10 BL Secondary Pairs of 2023

2023 BLs Best Trope Execution Awards! TOP 10

All the BLs Announced for 2023 that didn't happen

BL 2023's Best:

Back Hugs Thailand & Elsewhere

Cute Bits of Domesticity

Boys Feeding Boys

BOOP!

Best Cuddles

Heads in Laps

Touching Head Touches

Thailand Put His Head on Your Shoulder

Put Your Head on My Shoulder (not Thailand)

BEST KISSES (not Thailand)

BEST KISSES FROM THAILAND

Next Week Looks Like This

1/23 Happy Ending is a new high school set Strongberry 20 min short staring the actor who played Milk on Choco Milk Shake, so... YES PLEASE. I'm not sure where it will air but we all have our fingers crossed for Gaga or YT. Or both.

1/24 Love For Love's Sake (Korea Gaga & iQIYI)- based on the Manhwa ‘Love Supremacy Zone’ by Hwacha. A young man is dropped into a game based off a novel he loves. His mission is to make another player, YeoWoon happy. But then the game starts unfolding completely different from the novel.

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Viva la BL grandma superiority! (Cooking Crush)

Cooking Crush casually givign us some lovely lesbians (as indeed did The Sign). GL makes for a lovely acessory BL, carry on.

Now GMMTV, give us the REVERSE.

I love this dork SO MUCH. (Pit Babe)

I love that Cherry Magic is doing this scene over. One of my favs from the original.

Yai is BEST BOY. MVP and most likely the winner for 2024's Namgoong award.

(Last week)

[elkian]

GGG spoilers if you haven't reached BuzzHuzz proper:

I absolutely love the dynamic with Bauhauzzo and Huzzle Mug.

Art and history are intertwined. They cannot being meaningfully separated without catastrophic damage to both parties. You cannor create new things until you know what is *not* new. You cannot teach history without learning ways to reword it so that a modern crowd understands.

And both art and history are the enemies of cruelty, imperialism, fascism, etc. Creativity threatens a rule that demands monotony and abhors being questioned! History proves the rules being touted are wrong and have been discarded for a reason! And history remembers all the times this has happened before, and art provides a means to record that knowledge and provoke thought.

The God of Love/Love Songs who's writing an epic romance pairing up with the God of Teamwork and Storytelling, that's a lretty straightforward combination. The way it's presented is straightforward - we hear about Thespius and Click Clack being a duo a bit before we meet them, iirc.

But The God Of History, who is referenced as being old and stone and knowing everything, and the whacky God of Invention and Innovation who got previewed on Yugo Limbo's blog several times before release, they seem less obvious to me.

And being wrong about it made me more interested and curious in their zone, their lore, their situation! I love the notion that these two are as obvious a combination as writing and editing, as communication and love, as pranks and treats. What a grand dynamic. I don't know if BuzzHuzz is my favorite zone in the game, but it really hit me. (It's also where the plot really hits the gas, so it makes more of an impact, and that plot is directly connected to Bauhauzzo and Huzzle Mug's cooperation!)

[sadly-never-after]

Music in the EAH Universe and who listens to them Part 2.

This is just an excuse to try to make music puns and share music I think the characters would listen to. (Some of these are even canon by the books!) I don't even like a majority of these musicians but I am fully convinced of my choices here. I marked in colours the one that are canonically part of the EAH Universe.

Since Tumblr only allows 100 inline links for a post I have to make different parts.

Part 1 (Alistair, Apple, Ashlynn, Blondie, Briar, Bunny)

Part 2 (Cupid, Cedar, Cerise, Chase, Courtly, Daring)

Part 3 (Darling, Dexter, Duchess, Farrah, Faybelle, Ginger)

Part 4 (Holly, Hopper, Humphrey, Hunter, Jillian, Justine)

Part 5 (Kitty, Lizzie, Maddie, Meeshell, Melody, Nina)

Part 6 (Poppy, Ramona, Raven, Rosabella, Sparrow, Tucker)

ᡣ𐭩. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁જ⁀➴᭡ꨄ︎ C.A. Cupid ᡣ𐭩. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁જ⁀➴᭡ꨄ︎

Magic Mirror Girl (Not Allowed, Hate Yourself, Lovers Rock)

Beach Beast (Cloud 9, Sports, Love Sick)

Taylor Quick (Mine, You Belong With Me, Blank Space)

Lana d'Aulnoy (Love, Lust For Life, Video Games)

Florence & the Mill (Cosmic Love, Addicted to Love, You've got the Love)

𓋏☾⋆｡ 𖦹 °✩𓍯𓂃︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑ Cedar Wood 𓋏☾⋆｡ 𖦹 °✩𓍯𓂃︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑

Basia Beauty (Heart of my own, I Was A Daughter, No Control)

Fable Foxes (I'm not my season, Can I believe you, I Shall Be Released)

First Nursery Kit (My Silver Lining, Angel, Stay Gold)

Fish in Mirror Prison (Rule #4 - Fish in a Birdcage, Rule #8 - Otherside, Rule #10 - Roots)

The Crane Brides (Curses, Queen of Nothing, Never Love An Anchor)

˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ 🧺 ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ Cerise Hood ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ 🧺 ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖

April Vineyard (Complicated, Bite Me, I‘m A Mess)

Mayhem! in the Ballroom (I write sins not tragedies, New Perspective, LA Devotee)

Incandescence (Bring me to life, Everybody's Fool, My Immortal)

I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY CURSED ME (Modern Day Cain, Leave Me Alone, Simple)

My Storybook Romance (Teenagers, Kill All Your Friends, House of Wolves)

🗡⛨♝⟡⚔🛡✦ Chase Redford 🗡⛨♝⟡⚔🛡✦

Little Boye Cian (Easy, Talk me down, Too Good)

Royale (Everybody wants to rule the world, Tennis Court, Biting Down)

Trollan Gray (Maniac, Greek God, Heather)

The Brotherhood (Cry Baby, Lost in Translation, Lurk)

Five Pages of Summer (She's Kinda Hot, Youngblood, Amnesia)

𐬺𖦹꧁🃏꧂𖦹𐬺 Courtly Jester 𐬺𖦹꧁🃏꧂𖦹𐬺

Blue Fairy (The Dismemberment Song, Have To, Black Sheep)

The Spooky Jesters (Starstruck, Icicles, the daughter of the fish and the ram)

Tailor Hall (Ruler of Everything, &, Taken For A Ride)

Godmother, Godmother (Problems, Hayloft, Ghosting)

I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY CURSED ME (Nobody likes the opening band, Bleed Magic, New Invention)

―✧˖° 👑🪞⚔️ °˖✧― Daring Charming ―✧˖° 👑🪞⚔️ °˖✧―

One Reflection (Drag Me Down, Perfect, Love You Goodbye)

Trollplay (Something Just Like This, In My Place, Viva la Vida)

OneKingdom (Everybody Loves Me, Counting Stars, Stop and Stare)

Twenty one kings men (Level of Concern, Stressed Out, House of Gold)

The Brotherhood (Sweater Weather, Afraid, Scary Love)

You are trapped on an eight-hour long road trip with these guys and you have to give one of them the aux chord.

[piglet26]

Reylo Scenes: TLJ

Rian Johnson gets loud vocal dislike for trying to make part 2 to JJ Adams film and his treatment of Luke Skywalker. Now I'm going to be honest..... Star Wars fans complain. That's part of the passion of it all. I guess. One area that he did succeed in was Reylo. He dealt with it with complete mastery. His invention of the forceskype or forcetime which allowed the protagonist and antagonist to actually talk was genius.

To add, I read the novelization which does expand on the story overall and it's great to read. There are comics as well. All which expand on the story.

Rian Johnson also is due a thank you for this moment.

We'll call this no-more-daddies-Ren. That face should not be covered up.

Romance has always been apart of Star Wars. Yet, in the sequel trilogy there was this hyper paranoia of anything feminine and so anyone who sensed a romance happening I guess was just an unhealthy fool.

From a pure storytelling stand point, the dynamic between the hero and the villain is genuinely interesting. The fact that they are Ying Yang, alike but different, bonded yet on opposing sides and they attracted to one another only adds to the drama. It's the richest dynamic of the sequel trilogy.

So to all the Reylo haters

In the first forcetime scene the rules of the forcetime get established. Rey can't hurt him physically (yet) and Ren can't jedi mind trick her.

The production team continued to show their balance yet opposition. When Rey wakes up the warm sunlight is on her face and her smooth cheek. In Ren's scene the light on his cheek is mechanical and the skin is scarred. Rey is surrounded by nature. Ren is surrounded by technology. They both have a childlike innocence to them. Something is happening to them that had never happened before. Something unique even amongst force users. Ren is curious. Rey is just pissed off.

Ren is a man who feels very let down/betrayed by everyone in his life so by the time we meet him in The Force Awakens he doesn't want or need anybody. Within his comic Ben Solo is described as someone that everyone, including his peers, watched for signs of darkness. He's a bitter, hurt and jaded young man.

Rey is the denial queen. She has a childlike way of thinking that is purely optimistic. She latches onto people very quickly Finn, Han Solo, Chewie, Leia, Luke on and on. She understand the stories of the resistance, Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader, but doesn't understand any of the complexities. She's a very 'this is the truth as I know it so it must be the truth' kind of person.

When we arrive at the second Forcetime.

Rey overlooking the ocean. Ren overlooking the first order. Ren begins hearing the ocean waves. Rey begins to hear the snap of electricity. Ren sensing her turns and Rey, sensing him, adjusts and there they are.

Rey, understand that she can't physically act out her anger against, verbalizes it. She's angry, but she wants the anger to be simple and it's not. He is tied to her in a way in some way.

What's interesting is Ren is very open to her in wondering why the force is connecting them. In the book Rey describes his eyes as hungry. Also, Ren wants to be understood by her. He uses this moment to reach her and get someone to understand a portion of how he became the man he is. The audience sees him approach her, get into her space, challenging her emotionally, physically and her ideas about him.

"ah, you do" if it's possible to verbally create a orgasm....Adam driver accomplished it for women. It doesn't hurt that these two seem to always be eye fucking each other. The intensity in which they lock onto each other and don't pay much around them any mind. The actors writers dream of.

The scenes serves a purpose though. Kylo is once again shift from simple bad guy to complicated bad guy/human being. She doesn't know everything. In the mix of all of this is her experience with Luke. She disillusioned and she's disappointed with Luke. Her experience is shifting her to understand Kylo's position more.

Which leads to their third forceskype aka shirtless Ben

Rey, girl, you're not asexual. It's the first where we see she does have a reaction to him physically. She opens herself to understanding. She wants to know if he had a good reason for killing his father. She also expresses her jealousy of him. He has a family, he had a father who loved him. She would give anything for that. Kylo is also expressing his pain and how relates to her. They both feel abandoned by their parents. Kylo wasn't abandoned in the way Rey was, but he feels abandoned. Kylo looks at Rey like 'hey you don't see the similarities between us?". You also being to understand Kylo Ren's need to embrace the dark side because everyone on the light side failed him.

Part of her journey in The Last Jedi is about embracing her womanhood. After the force bond with the shirtless Kylo Ren. She goes to the dark sided vagina cave. She jumps in and when she emerges her childhood hair buns are gone. Rey enters in this vision and looks for answers as to who/where her parents are. Nothing is revealed to her. She didn't find the answers she was looking for and the hope that she will find them goes out of her. In this moment she's desperately lonely. Here our hero spiritually seeks out through the force bond the one individual she feels will relate to her, our villain.

Why do people call this scene "The Finger Touch Love Scene"

Cause the level of intimacy these characters reach without many words and without being lewd. Rian Johnson, bravo!

The way Kylo Ren is just present, reassuring and nurturing as Rey relays her trip into the dark cave. This is a moment where he could stoke her negative emotions to the dark side. He doesn't though. He's completely emotionally present for her. Kylo Ren sits within his ship in a area that's lit with a soft blue light as he reaches towards her he's in the warm of the firelight. Now he is physically present for her.

Rey is completely raw. She's allowing herself to be seen emotionally naked. This is the first scene where she gives him something with free will. She gives him union.

She reaches out from underneath the blanket. He takes his glove off and they slowly, innocently, reach for each other. The eye contact they maintain as the force theme begins, we as the audience understand something profound is happening. Within them, in this moment, there is a balance in the force.

They both have a vision of one another. Ren sees her past. Rey sees a glimpse of his future. This is the moment for Reylo, they both said to themselves "we're never letting this go". Rian Johnson confirmed it's from this moment that Ren decides to kill Snoke because that's the only way to protect Rey from him. Rey shift her belief system to complete Team Ben. She doesn't have a plan when she goes to meet Ben within the First Order. She just has complete faith in him that when the moment matters he'll stand by her.

We arrive at the elevator scene and just prior when she arrive onboard the supreme in a coffin from the Falcon that has his calligraphy on it. It's their first interaction after that intense force bond.

She expresses her faith in him and the possibility of a future. This is the first scene where she walks up on him. She wants that closeness and connection now. He's closed off we come to understand later, he's become he's protecting his mind from Snoke understanding his true intentions. They both express what they saw in their vision and conviction that one will join the other. It's canon that in this moment Kylo Ren wanted to kiss Rey.

Snoke - It's not his story. Kylo Ren looked like a badass killing him. That's all we needed you for boo. However, I did enjoy the internal dialogue of Snoke that the novelization affords. Through the force Snoke can feel Kylo Ren's need for approval which is something that frustrates him. He can feel his conflicted nature for Rey and for the light. He can feel his pain and confusion when Snoke says he bridged their minds (he didn't). That was enlightening.

My favorite moment is right after Kylo kills Snoke and Rey and Kylo looks at each like

"You with me?"

"Yeah, I'm with you"

And they turn to face the pretorian guards. They are with each other, but they do have a misunderstanding on what that means.

The fight scene is great and beautiful. Kylo Ren is a supportive partner to her and she to him. Kylo support her body with his and he takes on the majority of the Pretorian guards. He has a moment when he checks in on her, she get's hurt, he's upset and scared but then centers himself. When he's in trouble she supports him. It's described in the novel that they can feel each other's emotions through the force.

(Couldn't find the gif of her getting cut)

[eerna]

How is the hate watching going? Love your rants 😭

Dhshshsh thank youuu~~

I finished the show, but I was so weak from how dumb the ending was that I forgot to blog about it. God. God what is this show. I will sum up my opinions here.

This isn't an adaptation, it's a totally different alt history with a fantasy twist story. There isn't a single plot point that happens the same way in both the book and the show, including the actual historical guidelines. I don't even think I noticed any book quotes (aside from a few remixed ones, like Jane inventing the "you come here often?" line). Idk why they didn't just call it something else, it's not like MLJ has a big fandom they could mooch off of.

I already whined about this but I need to re-establish it. All the changes made were to make the story into tiktok romantasy brainrot. The book was already super sweet and silly with the horniness appropriate for a YA romance, but these guys went full "booktok authors advertising their romantasy works" with it. It has tropes just for the sake of tropes a la Bridgerton, where it doesn't take its time to relish in any bc it has to sprint to the next one to check the box. How you mess up an arranged marriage plotline is beyond me, I think that Jane and Guildford called each other "wife" and "husband" like??? Twice???? Bc they were too busy holding each other at knife point or looking at each other's showering butts or whatever. They didn't even TRY to include the shared curse, apparently that was too boring and vanilla for them once they wrote in that Ethians keep their clothes on when transforming.

The plot is simply wack. The pacing is off because they stretched the first half of the story across 8 eps 50 minutes each, so a lot of the time everyone is pointlessly meandering waiting for the next plot point/reveal so everyone can move on. And this usually happens in the form of sex scenes. It is actually hilarious how many plot relevant sex scenes there are, at LEAST one per ep, where characters are discussing the plot and/or convincing each other to reveal their secrets. Do the writers know there are other situations that allow characters to talk to each other??? Even Jane and Guildford have sex and she goes "So about your dead mother"

The writers keep forgetring previously established stuff. Edward and Henry can imprison/execute anyone without trial, but Jane has to "find evidence" that these guys are trying to kill her. It is established Ethians absorb their clothes and any items they are holding into their animal form, but then Guildford is running around with a shackle around his neck claiming it will break his spine if he turns into a horse while it is on him, BUT THEN later he gets out of thick ropes that couldn't be cut by turning into a horse??????? Did they forget their own rules of magic??????

The dialogue isn't as bad as something you'd see on CW, but it still isn't good. I hate it when you can tell a show is trying to be edgy by constantly swearing and saying and doing shocking things, it feels unnatural and dumb. Mary in particular is the worst case of this, I don't think she has a single character trait there that isn't there for humor edgyness. She keeps licking and chewing random things, doesn't bathe, keeps getting turned on when her father and brother are mentioned, and has meltdowns like a spoiled child (at one point this is a plot point, as in "Jane gets her to get upset in public so she loses her political credibility", but there are 0 consequences and Mary keeps acting like a child in front of the entire court and NO ONE does anything and she is STILL QUEEN when credits roll on ep 8). This is the MAIN VILLAIN why is ANYONE afraid of her is beyond me. Also the cursing, murderous, racist, genocidal 10-year-old was so annoying and I kept imaging her parents and all of the writers getting sent to the salt mines for putting that little actress through that.

The lead actors are stuck in this mess. Jane and Guildford had good chemistry, in a "these actors clearly know what they are doing even if no one else in the production does" way. It went a step further and Jane had strange charged chemistry with others too, to the point where I was like "... Did she ever smash Susannah???" and "Are we adding Archer into the mix????". Lady Frances and Lord Dudley also made me think "I wish you were in a better show".

Around the midpoint of the show when I realized Jane is not yet gonna be deposed I was like "Oh no, are they splitting it into two seasons???" But then Edward finished up his portion of the story to join the finale and Archer joined Jane so I was like "Oh, they are just changing the culmination to happen during the execution". But THEN the show ends with a cliffhanger and a promise to dethrone Mary. S2 will look even less like the book, but maybe that's a blessing.

The soundtrack sounded so cheap and digital. Amazon do not lie to me and say you couldn't get an orchestra to record it. The tracks were on loop you literally needed like a few days tops to record it.

All in all. This show sucks man I am so annoyed at it

[drbased]

men on the right pride themselves on how they're the ones who are truly 'respectful' of women - but also, far-right misogynists despise 'white knights' for being respectful of women. this is because men intrinsically understand that how they treat women needs to be transactional; there are rules and structures for how you're supposed to treat women. conservatives believe that their way of treating women is honest: there is an honest transaction at play of the man 'courting' a woman, who refuses to give up sex until marriage thereby proving she is pure, at which point she gives herself wholeheartedly to him, and with her trapped into marriage and birthing children, both cruelty (rape) and kindness (affection) blur into one singular cultural institution representing righteousness itself. this becomes 'true masculinity', 'true femininity' and 'men and women having different roles'. this is how conservatives get away with presenting themselves as kinder to women that the left wing - with clear boundaries between public and private, and rigid structures that reduce paranoia and sexual jealousy of the woman cheating or leaving him, conservatives can freely present an image of themselves being respectful of women in public. additionally, they can claim that simply following the 'natural order of things' is being kind to women in and of itself - after all, all the romance propaganda has sold to women an idealised idea of marriage, so a culture where men are seeking marriage gets to lay claim to the idea of it being more in line with what women want.

white knights, meanwhile, are men who are seen as kind and respectful to women with no boundaries or social structure. it's especially noteworthy that the kind of respect they supposedly give women is exactly the kind of respect that a conservative would disagree with - that is, agreeing with her opinions, especially the political ones and especially the feminist ones. conservatives believe that a man should lead and the woman follow - so a man listening to a woman is a complete betrayal of nature. this is all a smokescreen, of course - as with all right wing politics, it's all just made up shit to justify the fact that they don't like women having power. but still, an ideology is constructed around this, and exploring its apparent contradictions is a valuable exercise in deconstructing it. left-wing men do not hold to the rigid societal structure that right-wing men do, so both their cruelty and kindness to women tends to be more public by default. right wing men despise this, because tradition and social convention disguise morality; calling something 'normal', 'natural' or 'how we've always done things' is a form of social rohypnol that disrupts people's empathy process - morality becomes something divorced from the very basic context of causing someone harm and instead reflects some external and nebulous concept of righteousness. religion is a perfect example of this; it is infamous how christianity allows for pedophilia but calls homosexuality evil, and this is achievable because what is 'good' and 'bad' is determined not by real-world harm but by an invented concept of spiritual harm, allowing for a very effective form of social control and the preservation of power structures. so, then, do conservative men despise left-wing men for how the disollution of power structures makes the actual harm caused by misogyny much more recogniseable. here, right-wing men are engaging in what I call the 'hypocrisy fallacy' whereby if someone has a politics or morality system that primarily signals to being a kinder person in some way, they are expected to 'go the whole hog' and any failure to do so will result in accusations that they are hypocrites, and this is always presented as being worse than being honestly bad. An example is of meat-eaters making 'gotcha' arguments at vegans not caring about exploited farmers. So too do red-pilled men see 'white knights' as hypocrites for not being truly honest about their intentions. but there's an irony in all this - conservativism is fundamentally dishonest in its treatment of women, but the honesty between conservative men is much more about recognition of the transactional nature of respect and kindness. they're not claiming that women deserve respect for being human; whereas a 'white knight' is giving her respect they believe she has demonstrably not earned. therefore they despise what this signals to other men; they find it unchivalrous. and on top of that, they are fearful of what it signals to other women; these men are planting the idea in women's heads that if men are capable of at least seeming to respect us outside of our relationship towards purity and marriage, then we might actually deserve respect as human beings. patriarchy 'hurts men too' because men put a lot of work into these convoluted societal conventions in order to have both a functional society and a foundation of misogynistic cruelty. right-wing men are obsessed with the idea of societal collapse caused by the dissolution of social roles and women gaining more rights, and the more far right you go the more you see that fear take centre stage.

interestingly, though, this paranoia provides a valid societal function for men in preserving patriarchy. left-wing men form a useful scapegoat for the right-wing. men as a class need to 'pass the buck' on rape - we all know rape happens, so to disguise male-pattern violence, men require an alternate form of masculinity. racism, classism and ableism have always been useful ways of achieving this - accusing other men of being more bestial, less civilised and less evolved have always allowed for rape to be seen as something 'less human' males do. but also, the right-wing beliefs of tradition, a clear separation of public and private, and strong social roles means they like to stake a claim on their version of masculinity being 'real, healthy masculinity', with the left-wing dissolution of social roles and power structures scapegoated as the actual source of rape. within this there is a tacit admission that without societal structure, men will rape with impunity, but this is treated less as a moral confession and more of a threat - after all, right-wing men are consider themselves much more honest in their belief about rape being 'natural' for men, which is why it must been contained within the privacy of marriage, where it can be successfully disguised as righteous and natural - this is reflected in how rape has been allowed in marriage according to law until very recently. if you think about how men see rape - as a destruction of their property, it makes sense that conservatives see raping with impunity as something causing the downfall of society, just as mass rioting and looting would. left-wing ideology is presented as more bestial, not-so-coincidentally in line with how lower class men and men of colour are believes to be bestial and their interests broadly considered to be left wing. and of course, let's not forget how the left wing engage in the exact same thing - the rhetoric of right wingers is so much more obviously patriarchal and also right wing men tend to be associated with higher class white men, so the reverse situation gets to be used for the benefits of left-wing rhetoric and its interest in power structures and their dissolution. There's an interesting mirroring effect here, a delicate balance on both sides that is mutually beneficial.

the more I've engaged with this kind of theory, the more I've come to these sort of tinfoil hat conclusions whereby certain social paranoias stay around because they're actively benefit the class of people who have them. Just how individual people will hold beliefs that are harmful to them because deep down it benefits them to have them in some way, so do societies reflect that; and male class solidarity is so intrinsic and powerful that men will hold these catastrophic beliefs about other men being so useless and evil that they will cause society to collapse just so they can say to other women 'stick with us and accept our version of rape, or society will collapse'. so too, then, do right wing women do the same (still looking forward to when I can get a physical copy of dworkin's right wing women because I can't engage with ebooks).

[mesaprotector]

About halfway through the final volume of Ascendance of a Bookworm. My feelings about this series haven't changed - I really do love it, and it's "the exception that proves the rule" about isekai for me. At the same time, there are aspects I seriously miss from the earlier parts of the series.

Bookworm's strength, I thought, was always its worldbuilding. For an author who claims she hates worldbuilding she does WAY too good of a job with the Renaissance influences on Myne's world, the prayers, the logistics, the etiquette, etc.

The series changes very sharply after Part 3, going from Myne in Ehrenfest overseeing the printing industry to Rozemyne at the Academy. The worldbuilding stops being exceptional at this point (I can name at least two series with magic schools I think are more immersive), though it's still good. The plot is as good as ever, too, with meaningful drama and real tension!

I don't think Bookworm has exceptionally good character writing, but that's always been true. Its characters are generally very simple, very consistent, and quite loveable, which is good enough, and it's better than most LN series on that front. It does mean I care a bit less about the romance aspects than I might have, for a series that is a josei in all but name.

It does only feel lacking - in two ways. One is something I advocate for in almost all series - cozy moments. The first two parts, especially, were filled with happy scenes of Myne and her family, Benno, Lutz, and the orphanage, to contrast the suffering she goes through. As Myne learns to be a noble she really does lose her expressiveness, aside from the occasional moment of book rampaging or anger. And the series realizes this, even! It's explicitly stated that she cares more about her family and about Lutz than anyone else, even Ferdinand, and her affection for her noble family doesn't even come close. But self-awareness doesn't make up for the lack of coziness.

The other way is the single thing that makes Bookworm feel like a Renaissance isekai more than anything else, which is how it gets into the inventions, technology, and crafting process that goes into every little thing. This is a major focus of the first three parts of the series that plays very little into the final two. I think while it doesn't play as much into my emotional attachment to the series as the cozy thing, it definitely is the thing above all that makes Bookworm feel unique.

I do care about the Myne/Ferdinand relationship, to be sure, though the last half of the last volume will determine whether I feel it was well executed or not. This series struck such a nice balance between bitter and sweet for most of its runtime, that I hope it'll end the same way.

[shinobicyrus]

Old Bad Movies I Enjoyed Recently (And So Can You!)

TUFF TURF (1985) I am torn about Tuff Turf, because this short movie is confused in tone, bouncing between badly written romance, teen shenanigans like crashing the buffet tables of country clubs, rad rock concerts, and...oh... intimate partner violence and attempted murder. James Spader is a bicycle vigilante rocker who gets on the bad side of his new school's local bully/gang leader. Things do not improve when Spader also decides that he simply must charm said gang leader's girlfriend. What tension!

Honestly, the only reason this movie sticks with me is the presence of a young Robert Downey Jr, who is, I apologize to say, fucking hot. He plays the drums at a rock concert shirtless using handcuffs as belts for his leather pants. Look it up. Rather than the main romance, the more interesting chemistry is the friendship of RDJ's and Spader's characters (insert Ultron fanfic joke here), which borders on the intensely homoerotic. Really, Tuff Turf makes me yearn for a more interesting film that would have removed the "fighting over a girl" element of the story and just had RDJ and Spader as rad rocker/vigilante boyfriends partners.

IRON EAGLE (1986) This movie about fighter jets actually predates Top Gun by a few months - only instead of Tom Cruise and very heterosexual volleyball matches it's about a group of military brats living on a US Military base. The main character's dad is a pilot who was shot down over a non-specific (but definitely evil) Middle Eastern country, but since the mean adults don't want to do anything, it's up to the kids to steal an F-16 fighter jet and rescue him! This film is only the Purest 80s Reagan Americana where you get to see classic Teen Movie shenanigans evolve into "and then the main character committed war crimes."

A ridiculous, awful film. Did this movie change my life? Possibly.

AMERICA 3000 (1986) A strange, weird, absurd film set in the post apocalypse, where nuclear war has set humans back to the stone age and Amazon women rule over (mostly) intellectually inferior men. My friends and I couldn't decide whether the slang they invented and used copiously in this film was annoying or not. Hilariously, it being in the 80s, the dumbest thing about this whole film is that despite the tyrannical Amazons hating men and only reluctantly using them for breeding, this film also stubbornly refuses to acknowledge even a hint of the existence of homosexuality. Which is probably a blessing, to be honest.

I found it tolerably bizarre enough to watch. Once. Your results may vary.

HACKERS (1995) We now jump into the 90s, and have you heard of these new-fangled things called computers? Standing out as one of Angelie Jolie's earliest movies and a real breakout role for her (it's also where she meets her future ex-husband, Johnny Lee Miller - who most people on this site will recognize as Sherlock Holmes in Elementary). The movie is essentially about a group of high-school hackers with ridiculous handles who run afoul of a corporate conspiracy, are framed, and must dodge the Secret Service while trying to clear their names. But the plot doesn't really matter all that much. What makes this movie shine is the dialogue, the characters, the costumes, and the✨ vibes ✨. This movie is a cult classic for a reason, and the queer coding of all the hackers is undeniable to a modern audience.

It's not a good movie, but its imperfections are what make it so strange, hilarious, and unique. I felt the oddest sense of nostalgia watching this movie, despite the fact that the bizarre pseudo-futuristic world it depicts never actually existed. It made such an impression that I instantly acquired a physical copy of Hackers after my first viewing of it. Hack the Planet!

Space Truckers (1996) To round us off we have Dennis Hopper starring in this film with surprisingly good production values (for the time) failing utterly at everything it attempts to do. Ostensibly about down-to-earth (ha) blue collar space truckers just trying to make an honest living hauling goods across a solar system being increasingly corporatized and hostile to independent workers.

Throw in an evil corporation, space pirates, and a plot to overthrow earth's government with night-unstoppable killer robots, and you have all the elements for what could be a decent movie, but none of them really mesh and are soured by some pretty uncomfortable "romance" elements that have not aged well.

It's a movie that fails in so many ways, but it is at least interesting in its attempt. The people who made Space Truckers took a risk, and in this age of constant sequels and reboots even a failure like this feels...refreshing.

[phuljari]

incoming rant: the robotification of women

teri baaton mein aisa uljha jiya (2024) is among the latest movies in the genre of science fiction romance. it reminded me of an old itv show bahu hamari rajnikant (2016) , while i wasn't an avid watcher of the latter, i knew of it's existence. why did it remind of that particular sitcom? well, mainly because of the comedy. but it also reminded me of similar themes in english movies like ex machina (2015), wifelike (2022), archive (2020) and her (2013), which is surely a bit far fetched considering that in her, the ai never had a body. only a voice.

here, i think it's impertinent to also acknowledge male robots in indian cinema, like chitti from robot/enthiran (2010) and g.one from ra.one (2011) even though he wasn't an actual robot? i don't know if he classifies as one. so let's say, non-human, programming-based male entity (nhpbme). similar to samantha in her, a non-human, programming-based female entity (nhpbfe).

so yes, while male robots and nhpbme do exist in the sci-fi romance genre, it's the comparatively larger robotification of women that feeds the male gaze, and the patriarchy by an extention— which is ultimately problematic.

coming to the movie that i actually want to discuss, kriti sanon's sifra, in tbmauj, is the perfect lover, perfect bahu. why? she knows everything aaru (shahid kapoor) likes and wants. she has no chik-chik or tantrums like other girls. she can make cuisines from all around the world, can access everything on the internet quickly. she has perfect skin, perfect hair. probably doesn't age too. she is the dream girl of a typical man. she doesn't have her own opinions or problems, she serves him and him alone. no family of hers to care about, she can care about his family and their needs. the female gendering here acts like objectification.

the worst part of this movie was that it didn't do anything? since it was a comedy, it didn't delve deeper into the nuances of increasing technological reliance that humans have. i think it was probably meant as a warning— when sifra malfunctions and starts executing tasks that were deleted. but even at that, it fails because urmila's (dimple kapadia) company (so intelligently named) e-robots/robotex (something stupid like that), ends up launching her along with few other robots. only adds a dialogue which meant that you need to handle these robots responsibly. then, what was the point of all the testing they tried to do? placing her in different environments like india, when they don't really end up rethinking the whole idea or putting in more safety features? of course, there's no deeper meaning here. indian comedies don't really have subtext.

but it's perpetuates the same old concept of subservient women. rule-followers and caregivers. an image etched in stone. why do women ask– what do men want? men want this, an ideal version. have always wanted. fuelled by the unrealistic p*rn depictions. do they ever think what women want? aaru so casually tells off his friend who has a wife to look at how pathetic his own life is. he defends sifra's un-emotional response to a situation by attacking his friend's relationship asking if human women are any better?

it reminded me of wifelike (2022) where female robots are curated according to a person's need, a replication of their dead spouse. to love them, to serve them, to help them come out of grief. it's so funny to me how in tbmauj, sifra is shown to retain her feelings, getting jealous when aaru interacts with another woman despite getting reprogrammed; compared to how in wifelike, the robotic version of the human it was based on, always ended up leaving the husband because the human version never loved him.

isn't it interesting how female robots instantly get sexualised, and are depicted doing things that one would never ask their girlfriend or wife to do? these robots happily perform roles that are stereotypically feminine, wife-like. they're invented to put aside their feelings (if they have them) to take care of their human partners'. sifra cooks perfect food, emphasized by how many time aaru fired his maid for not cooking things the way he likes it. she probably doesn't have mood swings from periods because she's a robot. she doesn't eat, doesn't get out of shape. and most importantly, she doesn't age (cue: i'll get old but your lovers stay my age). as if the expectations from women aren't enough, that they're required to age gracefully, or best option— not age at all.

if you still don't get it, let me remind you how siri and alexa also end up on the same side of gender spectrum— female.

so the message is, guys, don't give up on your dream girl! you'll surely find a robot that satisfies all your needs! 🙄

men want perfect women, but women can't be robots. let's stop perpetuating the same image and setting unrealistic standards. real humans have real problems, deal with them.

[journey-to-the-attic]

That's for linking the role swap au I forgot about it but I loved it so much-

Now my only problem is where Zhaoxi should be placed in the AU, or if all, for the dads to romance. I had. Many thoughts on this (some more disastrous than others). Sorry in advance if this AU you were happy to be Zhaoxi free.

1. Least horrible (in my opinion) option. Zhaoxi was a creche teacher at the time and IK was one of his many kids to watch over. Probably blames himself partially on turning a blind eye to IK wandering around (not so much as turning but he was busy with many kids) and how that 'led' to her death (I doubt Diavolo or Mephistopheles willingly aired out the king's dirty laundry, so this is assuming no one knows the truth about IK's death). One day while mourning the death of IK (either he stopped being a creche teacher or he does it under false cheer), a newly arrived and brooding Lucifer runs across him and the two be sad old men together about the deaths of their loved ones (even if Lucifer's brothers are still with him, his sister is not and his brothers' dying still hurts too). Sad old men bond over being sad, then try to be happy despite the sad and help each other slowly heal. Only for Zhaoxi to spot demon IK later at the exchange and just frickin. Collapse. Watch out Devildom you might have another fallen angel soon.

2. True dad pairing. Sonno and Lucifer. Impossible and I refuse for all their sakes. I admit to touching on this in my thoughts (as Sonno, if I'm spelling his name right, is IK's creator and Father as an angel) but I refuse. I refuse.

3. *True* dad pairing. Solomon and Lucifer. Very weird in context to their relationship in the actual game/Jtta but Solomon in this AU has raised IK for x amount of years and possibly more closely falls into the Father category for IK. Possibly wouldn't work because Lucifer is religious figure turned angel in this AU so it can never be something official on the eyes of the Devildom masses (even if he fell I remember you mentioning that you doubted the demons would accept a fallen angel as King, would they accept a fallen angel as Queen?). Bonding over rascal IK and her antics with the brothers, Lucifer soon becomes the poster angel of angel-demon exchange program. Briefly thought if Solomon may have tried and failed to tempt Lucifer when the angel was a man but not sure. Could be a Thing where Lucifer's pride was not his downfall (at that moment) because his belief in his flock and brothers kept the tempting Solomon at bay. But also not the point of these thoughts so.

Sorry for the brain rot especially when you aren't on this AU specifically and there are other pairings besides Zhaolu I know but. Yeah.

Hi and have a nice day. Don't forget to hydrate.

okay this is not meant to be the takeaway, but i love the common thread that having a dadly connection to ik is enough to link a pair up

so re: scenario 1 - the swap goes human -> demon, ik is specifically demon-who's-a-fallen-angel, so technically zhao would be a demon - but if he just falls later in the timeline, this still fulfills the condition. though diavolo would have to have a really good reason to do that - which is assuming he hasn't straight-up banned exile as a punishment

(also, slight tangent, i gave myself this idea by saying "fulfill the condition": consider that this is an au within the universe itself. as in, this is an alternative timeline that is connected to the jtta one, in the same vein as all the universes in everything everywhere all at once or the spiderverse movies. idk where i'm going with this but the idea of some higher cosmic being playing dolls with these characters, making them suffer to fill some kind of story quota... which i'm now realising is basically just what we do every time we invent an au whoops. think the special ending(s) in pathologic)

actually this made me think of something: given sonno's very overbearing rule in all universes, i wonder if in this version of the celestial realm, the regular angels don't actually know that dissenters get exiled and fall, they straight up think they just die

i imagine diavolo knows from early on, and part of the reason it takes him so long to get the yikes and rebel is because his dad convinces him that exile is the kinder option over actual execution, so it's only once he's forced to banish a harmless fledgling that he fully registers that hey this is fucked up

re: scenario 2 - sonno and lucifer is so insane a concept, not least because it 1. could make lucifer diavolo's stepfather, and 2. in this au, could also make diavolo ik's stepbrother - and for these reasons it is so fucking funny (sonno is dead by the present of this au, but his remnants could always come back as the Big Bad of the whole story)

i feel like whatever solomon and lucifer have going on in scenario 3 could be this au's equivalent of solomon's constant "pact? pact?pact? pact? pact?¿", but solomon starts doing more of a "diplomatic partnership?diplomatic partnership?¿" thing sbjhdfbs

(also i know the 'least horrible' metric is probably in relation to the insanity of sonno/lucifer - but the way the precedent is set + order the scenarios are given in makes it sound like solomon/lucifer is the most horrible option lol)

[drchenquill]

Thumbprint challenge

Thank you @willtheweaver for tagging me!

Rules: look back on your works, both past and present, finished and unfinished. What are five to ten narrative elements or tropes that continuously pop up in your work? Give a list of these things!

Magic or anything fantasy related has to be part of the story. I have like three non-magical wips, but fantasy makes the writing so much easier. It gives me more freedom to invent and create new things.

Characters that are hard on the outside but soft on the inside. I don't know what it is about this trope, but one (1) character always has to be like this in my books.

Secret heritage/identity. I tend to use that element a lot in my books to create a bit of friction between the characters. I wouldn't call it drama, but it definitely helps me bring some flavor into the story.

Tragic backstory. Oh boy, if they don't have a tragic backstory, then they will have a tragic present. Traumatising is and will be one of my biggest plot devices. It keeps the story flowing but explains some of the choices, good or bad, my characters make. I want the reader to think: "Oh, that's why they did that"

Found family (or something similiar). In the telling of the story, most of the main characters get thrown into situations which lead them to meet other characters and eventually grow attached to each other. This trope helps me showcase the growth of, for example, my angry Italian man that, at the beginning, could not stand the main character, but as the story progressed he opened up, found peace and understanding, aka found family.

Romance. Someone is always in love or will fall in love. Can't help it, I'm a sucker for good romance.

This was fun!! Tagging, with no pressure, @agirlandherquill , @kaylinalexanderbooks , @theink-stainedfolk , @njnetails , @cssnder and everyone else~

[hussyknee]

re conditional privilege:

whether it comes to race, ability, gender, sexuality or class, people are really hung up on this idea that ambiguity affords protection, which is the same as privilege. as though having camouflage means you aren't hunted.

only the oppressed are concerned with our own variation and degree of difference. there is no ambiguity in the eyes of the oppressor. the reality is that the oppressors don't care how like them you are. in fact, being like them is all the more reason to punish you and keep you in your place. the project of exclusion is not to force conformity, it's to find people to make an example of so that others try to buy safety by trying to obey the most cruel and arbitrary rules. the more people try to conform, the narrower the criteria becomes, the more they fail, the more can be punished. that is how systems of power propagate themselves, because power can only be retained by exercising it, by whichever rationales necessary.

i understand that "identity politics" is a word that's been weaponized by the right wing, but it's a legitimate criteria of criticism for the left. when something moves from self-definition and community to tribalism, policing and self-branding, it has become a project of neoliberal hyperindividualism. identity politics focuses on defining ourselves by the extent to which we are punished as individual groups and under what criteria, imagining a rational and restrained power matrix that metes out punishment according to the degree of difference and perceived threat. it imagines an oppressive power structure as a methodical, conscientious gardener pruning a rose bush, rather than a brutal machinery that has invented arbitrary rules to violently subjugate and systemically mass murder the lives it needs to sustain itself. instead of building a community around the fact that we're all being hunted by the same beasts, idpol would rather build a hierarchy of prey animals according to the ways we'll be skinned and cooked, stopping only short of putting us on a menu with accompanying prices.

i suppose when you define yourself according to the appetite of the thing that wants to eat you, you end up weirdly attached to the romance of being eaten, and hate to give it up.

[ineffably-poetic]

hi everyone i have a very important announcement to make

GOOD OMENS RAPUNZEL AU

once again i’m gonna need you to hear me out on this one.

so Zira is an angel who is scared to go against the rules, but part of him wants to be free. Who else is like that? Rapunzel.

Crowley is a demon who actively breaks the rules and goes against everyone else, and convinces Aziraphale to do that as well. Who else is like that? Flynn Rider.

Gabriel is an angel who always puts Zira down, tells him Crowley is the enemy, and that he’s naive, too soft. Who else does this? Mother Gothel.

Now does everyone remember Mother Knows Best (Reprise)?

Okay listen:

[RAPUNZEL, spoken] I think he likes me

[MOTHER GOTHEL] Likes you? Please, Rapunzel, that's demented This is why you never should have left Dear, this whole romance that you've invented Just proves you're too naive to be here Why would he like you? Come on now, really? Look at you, you think that he's impressed?

So Aziraphale is in love with Crowley, right? And obviously Gabriel thinks Aziraphale shouldn’t be on Earth. SAME AS IN THE LYRICS.

[RAPUNZEL] No!

[MOTHER GOTHEL, spoken] No? Oh, I see how it is.

Rapunzel knows best Rapunzel's so mature now Such a clever grown-up miss Rapunzel knows best Fine, if you're so sure now Go ahead, then give him this

This is why he's here! Don't let him deceive you! Give it to him, watch, you'll see!

Trust me, my dear That's how fast he'll leave you I won't say I told you so - no Rapunzel knows best! So if he's such a dreamboat Go and put him to the test

Aziraphale finally tries to defy Heaven’s wishes near the end, but is once again shut down when Uriel and Sandalphon come down to Earth. Then he does so again by not participating in the war. And then finally he helps Adam save the world.

Also, what is Crowley trying to get from Aziraphale in Episode 3? HOLY WATER. So instead of Flynn trying to get the crown, it’s Crowley trying to get the holy water.

If he's lying Don't come crying Mother knows best...

Also, this could be a stretch, but “Mother” could be argued as God. Maybe Gabriel is trying to convince Aziraphale to follow along with him because it’s “what the Almighty wants”.

anyway, yeah. that’s why there should be a Good Omens Rapunzel AU.

(and don’t even get me started on how Rapunzel and Flynn reflect Zira and Crowley’s sunshine personified and grumpy guy who’s actually a nice person dynamic)