#they got weirdly conservative

[spikeyjo]

[palatial-monstrosity]

Random cishet dude in a Lannister t-shirt at peak GoT popularity: yeah Jaime is a badass! Go Cersei! Random queer person on twitter today: oh NO you cannot WRITE about INCEST in fact you cannot even THINK about it lest be judged problematique

[the-dragonlich]

It is always weird and kind of depressing to me to see people who I know used to be really left leaning become conservative/centrist as they get into their late 20s/30s. Because like genuinely wtf happened, what changed to make you think any of of the shit that’s happening is suddenly okay when it wasn’t not even 10 years ago to you.

[neverendingford]

.

[veroniquesboutique]

A Good First Impression - Atsushi Murasakibara x AFAB!Reader

I am feral over Atsushi Murasakibara. Worms using my brain for food type of feral. Foaming at the mouth type of feral.

He is unironically my phone background type of feral.

So, uh....here's this. Personally, I feel real great about it, so I hope you enjoy it as well.

Title: A Good First Impression

Rating: Explicit

Warnings:

AFAB!Reader, Female Reader, f-receiving oral, fingering, it is genuinely only him eating you out, mention of m-receiving handjob, super intense orgasm, squirting, reluctance/hesitation about the squirting but not quite dubcon/noncon, baby used regularly as pet name, college au, fear of getting caught, getting caught after the fact, home for the holidays, parent mention

Characters & ships: boyfriend!Murasakibara Atsushi x AFAB!Reader

Word count: 2.6k words

Summary: Your long-term boyfriend is nervous about staying at your childhood home and meeting your parents for the first time for four reasons:

1 - He's tall, and people tend to comment on it. Too much. 2 - First impressions are a big deal, and what if he fucks it up with his future in-laws? 3 - He met you in college and is terrified of learning something about the you from before (spoiler: you pass the test!) 4 - He can't keep his hands off of you, and he doesn't want the embarrassment of getting caught.

18+ Minors DNI!

More explicit below the cut

Atsushi Murasakibara was nervous to meet your parents for many reasons.

First, his height. This was the first time he was meeting your family, and your parents weren’t exactly short per se, but he was a towering 6’10”. He hated new people having to crane their neck up to look at him, he hated the same three questions and two jokes that every person tells when they meet someone as tall as him, and he hated that he was going to have to learn the careful layout of your childhood home since it was likely not designed with someone of his towering stature in mind. It was always so embarrassing when he’d bump his head on too-low ceiling fans or when he had to bend too far to reach the sink. No one really realizes how weirdly isolating it feels to be at least a head taller than everyone around you, and that’s if he’s lucky. It definitely makes the first impression game much harder.

Second, the holidays. For some reason, instead of meeting your parents for the first time at a low-stakes dinner or briefly in public, he agreed to stay for a week for the holidays at your house. It wasn’t ideal, but they lived in the countryside, and a hotel would have been so inconvenient, so you two decided to stay with your parents. He even sat through the awkward conversation where you all had to figure out if he was sleeping in your room or on the couch. Your parents weren’t exactly the most conservative people in the world - they knew you lived with him now for God’s sake, so it’s not like they had no idea what you two got up to - but everyone was deeply uncomfortable with the suggestion of anything happening under their roof. That being said, none of their couches could handle him - re: the aforementioned height problem - so they made the disgruntled decision to let you two room together. Just no locking the door.

On top of it all, he wanted to bring them gifts, but he had no idea where to even start with holiday gifts for future in-laws he’d never met. You insisted that he didn’t really have to get them anything and that they’d be thankful for anything he put thought into, but that didn’t ease the burden of deciding if your dad was a beer guy or if he was a tool guy or if he was a sports guy or a grill guy or a music guy. The options made his head spin, and that’s not even touching all the possible gifts he could get your mother. This was it - THE first impression - and if he didn’t get it right, he was afraid of a rocky relationship with them forever.

Third, your childhood. He didn’t know you before you two met in college, so everything about you before you moved to the city is a complete mystery to him. His worst nightmare was discovering something about you that he would never be able to unsee. He had always hated the vulnerability in this moment in all of his previous relationships, and it had soured more than one relationship well before its expiry date.

The night you arrived, you showed him to your room, and he held his breath as you swung the door open for him. He walked in, looking around, waiting for the weird childhood shoe to drop, but…it didn’t. The room was fairly normal. It looked like it could be a teenage room in a movie. It seemed stale, set in time, but it didn’t give him the same feeling of ick throughout his body. Carefully, shelf by shelf, he investigated your knickknacks and decorations and memories, and everything he saw made him love the small piece of you that he knew more than the last. By the time he had overturned every stone in your room, his heart was beating harshly in the rhythm of your name.

“You look like you were expecting something crazy,” You laughed at him, having watched him snoop through your past.

He looked at you, his eyes full of warmth. “I was. I didn’t find anything.”

And then he snuck a kiss.

Fourth, the final most important reason he was nervous was you. Well, to be more specific, he was nervous because he couldn’t keep his hands off of you, and this trip wasn’t going to change anything.

He was nervous because he didn’t want to get caught.

“Ah-Ah, ‘Sushi!” You moan, high pitched and trying to keep the volume low as you wiggle in his grip in an attempt to free yourself from the intensity of his tongue between your legs. Your wrist is pressed against your lips to dampen the sound. He tightens his grip on the back of your thighs, pushing your legs further apart and against your body, opening you up for him, and his tongue continues roughly sliding against your sensitive, buzzing clit.

“They aren’t home. You can be loud,” He grunts against you before wrapping his lips around you and sucking you into his mouth, and you can’t help it as you throw your head back and cry out at the feeling.

“They could be home any second!” You hiss, your hips bucking involuntarily against his face, and in response, he moans deeply, sending tingles through your body.

“Then cum before they get back.”

Biting your lip and panting, nearly winded, you stare down at him, meeting his eyes watching you just over your pelvis, and when his tongue dips into you and presses against your trembling walls, you moan loudly with a furrowed brow. Your fingers tangle through his messy purple strands, pushing his face against your core harder.

He slurps the messy wetness dripping out of you, the sound lewd enough to make you blush. “God, you taste so good,” He groans into you, his tongue desperate. “It’s been too long.”

“It’s been three days!” You laugh breathlessly, body convulsing at the small nudges of his nose against your clit as he drinks you in.

“And that’s three days too many,” he complains, shaking his head and smearing his face against the slickness between your legs. “I can’t wait like that. I need you all the time.”

You pant in response, unable to form words when his tongue finds your clit again, brushing against it at a punishing pace. Your eyes roll to the back of your head, your stomach spasming, and he finally releases one of your legs from his controlling grip just to slide it up your needy slit and dip one of his long fingers into you. You nearly cum then, your back arching so aggressively that you hit your head against the wall, and he can’t help the small laugh that rumbles against your nerves.

“Careful, babe,” He mutters, curling the single finger inside you, and the feeling is such a warm, pleasurable tightness in your core.

“I’m going to cum,” You whisper, dropping your jaw open in pleasure, and you feel his smile in response.

“I’m not done yet, so if you cum now, you’re going to have to handle it when I keep going.”

You whimper, lip quivering and body shaking. Breathing, you attempt to stave off the orgasm that has you dangling off the edge of sanity. He slows his movements, watching you closely as he wrings you of cute little sounds and moans and shivers, and it helps when you suck in air, huffing through your nose to stop the trembling in your lower abdomen.

“Y-you said cum before they get back,” You counter, hissing the words through your teeth as you lean up, your toes curling tightly. His tongue helicopters against your throbbing clit, and he takes the hand that was on the back of your other thigh and places it atop your pelvis, pressing down as the finger still deep inside presses up, and you feel the telltale tightening in your core that makes you panic a little.

“You can choose to cum now and be overstimulated, or you can choose to cum later at the risk of your parents hearing you,” He looks up over you with a smile, a second finger suddenly pushing into you to meet the other. “I’m a believer in autonomy.”

As his two fingers now press into the gummy sweet spot in you, you confirm the tightening is definitely going to cause many, many more problems than he’s considering. You bring your hands to grip the bedding below you, trying to wiggle away again. “’Sushi, I-I, wait, I’m going to-” You frustratingly cut yourself off with a groan as his mouth finds your clit again.

“Going to what, babe?” His voice rumbles against you, and there’s a soft wash of pleasure moving through you like waves against a shore. You can only think that it’s going to be a pain to clean after this.

“It’s going to-I’m going to-”

“Aw, baby, I need you to use your words,” He teases, batting his eyelashes innocently when you shoot him a glare.

“I’m going to make a mess,” You grunt through gritted teeth, raising your eyebrows in hopes of him understanding the euphemism, and when it clicks in his brain, his eyes go bright and wide.

He hums darkly, pressing his fingers into you deeper and earning a surprised squeal out of you. “You’re going to squirt for me, baby?”

“God, I hate that word!” You yelp, involuntarily grinding your hips down onto him and panting out in tight, restrained pleasure. “You-you gotta stop now, I-”

“I wouldn’t dare waste this opportunity. You know I love making a mess of you.” His voice is dark, his eyes still teasing as he draws circles around your clit, and between the stretch of his now scissoring fingers, the pressure on your pelvis from his large hand, and his unrelenting pace on your sensitive spots, you’re seeing stars.

Falling back, you groan again, the feeling of uncomfortable tightening worsening deep in you. “The bedding!” You exclaim, arching your back, “I can’t-ah, fuck, I’ll mess up the bedding.”

“Your parents have a washer.”

“The bedding was from my grandmother,” You groan, scrunching up your face and writhing, closing your thighs around his head when it gets too intense. Hyperventilating, you press the side of your face into the pillow, bringing your hand to your face to bite down on your hand to quell the rocking of pleasure inside you now.

“Pity,” He mumbles, distracted too much by the sounds pouring from your mouth, the clenching of your pussy, the taste of your arousal coating his tongue, the slick sounds of his fingers deep in you, and the promise of even more to come (literally and figuratively). “We should’ve put a towel down, huh?”

You groan, frustrated by his lackadaisical demeanor but unable to communicate it as the feeling of pleasure floods your body. You can feel your eyes go a little hazy, and moments later, you call out, your orgasm hitting you like a wall of bricks. It feels like an electric shock through your body, every muscle in your body tensing with a tight zap as the dam breaks inside of you. You squirt, gushing and coating the bed and, effectively, Atsushi’s face, and the only thing that cuts through the absolute sensory overload of your pleasure is his praise that he groans against your skin.

“That’s it, baby, that’s so good. Feel it, c’mon, you can breathe. You taste so good, thank you, baby, thank you.”

With your heavy pants and soft, whimpering moans as aftershocks of the orgasm reverberate through you, your pussy pulses and throbs in time with your heart, and when he softly pushes into you one last time to wring the rest of it out of you, you squeak out a last whine as the final wave of your cum rushes out of you and over his hand. He chuckles at the sight, pulling out of you and dragging his tongue up his fingers while making dark, teasing eye contact with you. Watching his tongue work to lick all of your cum off his skin, your body trembles with both your world-shattering orgasm and the sudden impending need that pulses through you yet again already.

“Kiss me?” You breathe softly, lips barely parted, and he cracks a wide smile, laughing like he’s disbelieving of you.

“You’re going to be the death of me, baby.” His voice is tense and dark with desire, and he crawls up your body slowly, and he meets your mouth with his extended tongue. You lick against it, tasting yourself, and he moans out loud, his hips pressing against yours. His length, hard and impressive, rubs against you, and the friction makes you cry out. You’re too sensitive and overstimulated, but he just smirks against your lips. “I told you to choose carefully. I wasn’t done with you.”

His hand drags down your body, feeling your curves with a hint of possession in his grasp. When he reaches his waist where his hips are pressing into yours, he grips his belt, pulling at the buckle, ripping it through the belt loops on his pants -

The front door opens. The sound of rustling bags floats up to your room. The floorboards creak.

Your eyes go wide in panic.

“Sweetheart?” Your mother calls up the stairs. “We’re home! Atsushi and you should come down and help us with dinner.”

“Get up, get up!” You mutter under your breath, gently batting at his shoulder as he frantically slides off you and off the bed, fixing his belt and helping you by pulling your bedding off. You’re searching for clothes, quickly pulling them on your legs.

The stairs whine as someone climbs step by step.

Your face burns at the impending embarrassment. Atsushi is struggling to hide his arousal with his clothes, and you’re struggling to wipe the slowly drying slick from between your thighs. Your bedding lays in a crumpled, suspicious ball on your mattress.

“Sweetheart?” Your mother asks again, her voice much closer than before.

The doorknob jiggles against the lock.

“C-coming!” You call back, pushing your fingers through your hair as Atsushi wipes his hands down his face to clean up any mess left behind.

“Your door’s-”

You cut off your mother’s inquiry about the locked door by swinging it open. “Sorry, force of habit,” You laugh, opening the door wide enough that she can see Atsushi sitting at your desk with his phone in his hand. He nods a greeting at her.

Her eyes flit to your unmade bed, back down to you, and back over to Atsushi. A slight blush covers her cheeks. “We…we brought groceries for dinner. Would you two like to come help?”

You look over your shoulder at Atsushi who meets your gaze. After a moment, he shrugs and nods. “Sure, we’d love to.”

“Great…come…down when you’re ready,” Your mother says awkwardly, quickly excusing herself back down the stairs. Once you hear her shoes click into the kitchen, you shut the door again, pressing your back to it as you finally let the air in your lungs go in a long sigh. You look up at Atsushi who is trying to bite back his laughter.

“Do you think she noticed?” You wince, knowing the answer.

“Oh yes, absolutely. She knows everything,” He stands, lumbering across the room towards you. He kisses your nose, his hand meeting yours on the doorknob. “Let’s go help with dinner.” He thinks. “And maybe later you can pay me back with a handjob in the shower.”

You groan, the thought of the blush on your mother’s face making your embarrassment burn brighter. “Absolutely not.”

[alphajocklover]

The following story was a commission from a reader who would prefer to remain anonymous. They have given me permission to share this story. Quick thank you to them.

Made For This Town

Maxwell Ford was moving.

Specifically, Maxwell Ford was moving to a small town called Maxford.

Max Ford was moving… to Maxford.

It was almost funny, or at least it would have been funny if Maxwell wasn’t absolutely miserable about this entire thing.

Maxwell hated that they were moving again. His family moved quite a bit, his mothers job as a software engineer bringing them all around the country. Usually Maxwell was fine with moving. It was annoying but he was used to it. He was a fairly social guy and made friends easily. This time Maxwell doubted he’d make any friends at all, mainly because Maxwell was basically moving to the middle of nowhere.

When he had first heard they were moving to a town that shared his name he thought it was actually kind of cool. Even when he learned it wasn’t a city he had still been kind of excited. He had lived in cities his entire life, and had actually been curious about what it might be like to live in a small town. Then he had learned about what Maxford was actually like. There wasn’t a lot of information about it on the internet, which was a little strange since everything was on the internet these days, but what he had learned had soured him on the town completely. Maxford was… well it was weirdly normal. There was no other way to put it. The town was weirdly normal. Maxwell knew that a lot of small towns were conservative and focused on athletics, but Maxford seemed to take it to a whole new level. Everyone was conservative and athlete obsessed. Absolutely everyone! It didn’t sound possible, but try as he might Maxwell couldn’t find any semblance of any sort of counter culture. There were no nerds, no goths, no punks and no LGBTQ people of any kind. The only mention of LGBTQ people and Maxford were some quack conspiracy theorists online raving about some kind of reality changing forcefield. Maxwell was convinced that even if he found other nerdy or gay people like him in Maxford, they’d be absolutely crazy. It wasn’t like Maxwell could do anything about it though. He was just 18 and hadn’t finished highschool yet. He didn’t have the means to live on his own. So he resigned himself to spend his senior year surrounded by jocks. Though that didn’t stop him from pouting about it the whole ride there.

“God it’s like there's no cell service out here.” Maxwell groaned from the passenger seat of his family's subaru. Maxwell could hear his dad, Samuel Ford, sigh from the driver's seat, and could tell his dad was rolling his eyes without even looking. Maxwell knew it was all in good fun though. He and his dad actually got along great, which made sense considering they were both very similar. Both were skinny men who appeared younger than they were and had a love for sci-fi and video games. The only real difference was that Samuel was far more mature and less emotional then Maxwell. His emotional maturity and kindness was probably the only reason Samuel was able to get Maxwell’s mother, Rose, to go out with him. Rose was both attractive and ambitious, and Samuel absolutely adored her. She had driven ahead in the family's other car with a bit more of their stuff, so currently the car was just father and son.

“Son, I know you’re not really excited about this move…” Sam said sympathetically, a kind smile on his face “But I swear it won’t be as bad as you think. I know this town is different from the places we’ve lived before, but I know you’ll make friends.” Sam said. Maxwell doubted it, but said nothing and smiled slightly at his fathers attempts to cheer him up as they approached the city limits of Maxford. “You’ll see, son. As soon as we get in there…”

“You’ll be pulling pussy like fucking crazy.” Sam Ford said, a cocky grin on his manly face as he gave his son a knowing smile.

Max Ford puffed his chest slightly with pride as he smirked at his Dad. He wasn’t really worried about getting a new girl to go out with him, since chicks were basically putty in his hands. Why wouldn’t they be? He was a fucking stud. Over 6 feet tall with roaring, beefy muscles. He was so big he already had a place on the Maxford High football team without even having to try out. He had sent some pictures of himself to the football coach and got a starting place on the football team just like that. But Max liked it when his dad complimented him, since he had looked up to the man his entire life, so he pretended to be nervous about finding a girl for homecoming so his dad would try and cheer him up. His dad was fully aware his son was just playing, but studs like them had to build eachother up. As they drove through Maxford, Max thought about the upcoming school year with a cocky grin. He knew being the new kid in senior year might be a little weird, but a guy like him could make friends anywhere. Plus, a guy named Max Ford in a town called Maxford? It was like fate. Max was sure he’d be the king of his highschool in no time.

Sam pulled up at their new house, parking their SUV next to the family pickup. He got out of the car and sauntered over to his wife Rose, who was waiting for them. She had come earlier to get the house set up. Being a stay at home mom, Rose wanted to make sure everything was perfect for her man. Max rolled his eyes as his parents kissed sloppily, almost gagging as his dad groped his Moms ass. Turning away from them, Max saw a busty girl across the street, staring at him with unhidden interest. With a seductive smirk, Max stripped off his shirt, threw it to the floor, and flexed for the bimbo, who he couldn’t hear giggle and blush as he showed off.

Max laughed. A town full of hot girls and cool bros. It was like the town of Maxford was made for him. Or… maybe he was made for the town of Maxford.

**Hope you guys enjoyed another little trip to Maxford! I don’t know how the fact that the random town name I made up would also make a good jock name didn’t occur to me till now, but I’m grateful it did! If you like this, stay tuned for more or maybe even commission me. I already got another commission for a much longer Maxford themed story on the books! See you later!**

[badasscoffeemug]

god i’ve said before how much i hate Doing Discourse but i can’t seem to help myself especially because i just saw a bddie say “a lot of bucktommy stans are weirdly conservative about queerness”

and sure, maybe some bucktommy fans are. but that accusation is rich coming from a group that got allll up in arms about some implied daddy kink, a little age gap between two adult men, or just a man being a bit bitchy. not to mention that one time someone started calling me names because i didn’t see a problem with the number of explicit bucktommy fics, lmao. because the bddies were writing soft romance, which is Good, instead of nasty gay sex, which is Bad.

[goodlouse]

my thoughts on the two most recent games i've played (mouthwashing and silent hill 2 (2001)) which i've been thinking about alternately for the past few days for similar reasons

going to mention spoilers in here but this post will probably only be fully comprehensible to ppl who have experienced both games

not expecting many to read this but tumblr is quickly becoming my outlet for opinions that I can't rlly post on very public sites like tiktok where any criticism of a media means that I hate it and hate you for liking it. haterism be damned I actually got a net positive from playing both of these games!!

so I started playing silent hill 2 (original because I do not believe in/have the money to buy modern remakes) fresh off the back of silent hill 1 which is a game I REALLY enjoyed. I would EVEN say that sh1 is my number 1 cosiest game of the year.

sh2 is dirtier, bleaker and sleazier than sh1, and is lacking a lot of the occult aspects that I really liked. it's also like one of the most talked about games ever so like . i went into it with the knowledge of a few major plot beats and it took a long time playing to be able to take the game on its own terms.

i also took a little break halfway thru the game to stream mouthwashing for some curious friends. mouthwashing is a game thats very popular w streamers & youtubers and their audiences, so major plot points are also incredibly talked about. I mentioned this to a friend while setting up the game and he said I'll get something out of it anyway and then compared it to silent hill 2, which I kind of brushed off as a "psychological horror w unreliable narrator" thing (sorry choccy if you ever read this) but it turns out the two games are actually very similar in the way they draw my ire LOL

these things being: -sexual assault victim who doesn't have time in the plot to exist outside of her trauma. this is partially due to both plots being very tight and concise with no elements that don't serve a higher function BUT -this is then undermined by certain areas of gameplay dragging. for mouthwashing especially the last ~45 minutes felt very weirdly paced and unfortunately made me think of ppl who speedrun garten of banban in under 2hrs to get the steam refund, which resulted in later chapters being padded w drawn out segments.

The friends I was streaming for that have consumed more media than I have said that a lot of tropes in the game felt a bit derivative, but I don't know the things its deriding from BUT I wish mouthwashing would take more from the survival horrors its imitating in it's style. The gameplay between character interactions is limited to inputting codes you've read or corridors where there's only one correct route and everything else results in a reset - I think people that watched mouthwashing through a letsplayer might not truly get how understimulating that feels. Some more psychologically symbolic puzzles and riddles would not have gone amiss!

which brings me back around to silent hill 2, where I am legitimately just too stupid to do the 'collect and combine 3 items to progress' without a guide. because A) I don't intuitively clear out all rooms because I hate all combat encounters BECAUSE i am being too overly conservative with ammo so every enemy gets a fight to the death with melee weapons

i finished the game with a SURPLUS of ammo btw so that is partially on me for making myself struggle unnecessarily, but oh my goddd the prison/labyrinth section took so long!!

I also quite disliked eddie's plotline, which unfortunately literally just came down to his character design :/ his plot revolves around resentment over the way he's been treated for his appearance, but as a fat fuck myself my grievance was with the way he's been dressed by real world character designers that are falling on stereotypes. its juvenile in a way that betrays the subtlety of the rest of the game, and makes him seem infantile despite being so essential to james's arc. I genuinely think that a wardrobe change would have silenced my gut reaction of "what are they trying to say with this?", and its disappointing to see that the remake didn't take the opportunity when they did with maria

angela's plot was fascinating to me for depicting an abuse survivor with some imagery I've not really seen in other media! I think her character was written with a lot of respect, and her and eddie's plots feel like complimentary and cautionary tales to james, but it's very sad that ultimately her trauma was depicted as something that can't be lived with - this is something she shares with anya. I guess it's kind of disappointing that a womans struggle with sexual trauma ends in death in two games that are 20 years apart, I personally feel that theirs (and jimmy's suicide) is a bit of a tired trope

however. despite finishing extended periods of both sh2 and mouthwashing feeling annoyed and frustrated that they werent as tight as the rest of the game, but now that I've had days to process them my mind has been lingering on a few moments.

-pleasantly surprised by how legitimately startling pyramid heads introduction, really good use of unsettling imagery -sh's soundtracks always hit at the moments it counts -the last hour of sh2 had me in tears, mary's letter was bittersweet and I love how the tone completely changes depending on the ending. as someone that likes the occult stuff in the other sh games I loooove the implications of the rebirth ending but I appreciate it seems a bit left field in this standalone plot

-jim & curly's ladder conversation in the cockpit, I think that one stuck with me especially as the one defining moment in both of their outlooks, the wealth and status inequality that still leaves both of them wanting more out of their lives.. the guilt and resentment that can come of circumstantial success etc etc -similarly the dead pixel convo -swansea's honest monologue -the glitch effect after anya's suicide was REALLY cool visually, it felt like the one defining moment where mouthwashing really took advantage of its medium

TLDR I feel like I learned a bit about what I like and dislike in psychological horror by playing these two side by side, defintely interesting research while I'm drafting a horror comic with a dreamlike atmosphere... :)

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

Vickie had been invited to Steve’s house by Robin, and she was completely nervous. It was a pool party which meant swimsuits. Should she go sexy or conservative? Fuck it, she's wearing a bikini. Over the bikini, she wore a pair of jeans shorts and a floral tank top. Vickie stared at her reflection in the mirror. She ruffled up her hair and pouted, and then she scowled.

"Why I am so pale?!" Vickie exclaimed.

"Once again, dear, I apologize for passing on my genes to you," her father said as he leaned against her doorway. "I like you, so should Robin. Although not in the same way."

"Dad! You have to like me," Vickie rolled her eyes.

"Everything's going to work out," Matthew said and grabbed his daughter by the shoulders shaking her. "You just have to believe in yourself the way that I do."

"I'm starting to regret telling you," Vickie rolled her eyes.

"You know that I'm proud of you, right?" He asked. "And if your mother were still here with us, she'd proud of you too."

"Thanks, Daddy," Vickie said softly. "I just wish I got to tell her."

"Oh, pumpkin, I think she always knew," Matthew told her.

"How do you know that?" She asked.

"She's your mother. Nothing ever got past her," he said. "Now, do we need to do something breathing exercises?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, now what do we tell our anxiety first?"

"To go to hell!"

"Damn straight or in your case not so straight!"

"Daddy!"

Vickie stood in front of the large house and was immediately intimated by its size.

"It's weirdly huge, right?" A voice, and she looked to find Eddie Munson standing next to her. "I always feel like it's going to eat me. You must be Vickie."

"And you must be Eddie Munson," Vickie said in amusement.

"Nah. I'm the guy that ate him," Eddie said sarcastically, and Vickie laughed.

"You're weird," she said. "My dad would like you."

"You should know now, Vickie, that my heart is pining away for someone else. . .just so you don't get your hopes up," Eddie said.

"So is mine," she replied.

"Good, now that that's settled," Eddie told her. "What's got you so nervous?"

"The idea of taking off my clothes," Vickie scoffed.

"Yeah, same here. I've got some nasty scars recently, and they're not quite done healing. Almost. They're ugly as hell," Eddie sighed.

"I've got a scar on my stomach from a car accident when I was little, but I decided to say "fuck it" and wear a bikini anyway," Vickie said.

"That's my kind of spirit. Fuck it," Eddie grinned. "Ready to head inside, my lady?"

"I am now," Vickie said.

The party was in full swing. All of Steve and Robin's friends were here. They were Eddie's friends now, too. Jonathan Byers, some guy named Argyle who Vickie immediately liked, and Nancy Wheeler. Vickie wasn't at all curious that Steve was friends with his ex, as she was still very much friends with hers. Robin seemed to be friends with her, too. There was this bond there that connected all of them, and she wasn't sure what it was, but she was glad they had it. There was this warm feeling of family amongst all of them. The one thing she hated, though, was the fear behind their eyes and the way they all jumped sometimes. Something told her that the bond they formed didn't start from a very good place. It wasn't her story to tell, though, so she wasn't going to pry.

"Whatcha thinking about, Lady Fisher?" Eddie asked as he plopped down in the lawn chair next to hers.

Vickie had gotten tired out from swimming and had decided to sprawl out into one of the lawn chairs. She had started thinking about the way Robin's eyes landed on hers when she started taking off her clothes, and the way remained steadfast on her face as though they were trying not to look anywhere else. It had made Vickie blush and somehow her thoughts had drifted.

"Life," Vickie told Eddie.

"Ah, yes, that bitch," Eddie said and Vickie giggled.

Her eyes landed on Robin and Steve talking animatedly with one another as they stuck their feet in the pool. She could have sworn she saw Robin say her name, and it made Vickie blush. She didn't realize that Eddie was talking to her until Eddie was snapping his fingers in front of her face.

"Hmm?" She asked.

"Is the person you like Steve?" Eddie scowled.

"What?!" Vickie exclaimed. "No."

Eddie turned his head at the same time hers did. His eyes landed on Argyle nearby.

"Argyle?" He asked.

"Well, no, I mean, a little, but I think everyone likes Argyle just a bit. I mean. . .," Vickie trailed off.

"Except for Robin," they said at the same time.

They gasped and slapped their hands on their mouths at the same time. Vickie did not mean to say that, although it didn't necessarily imply that Robin is a lesbian. Still. Wait. . .Vickie removed her hand at the same time that he did.

"You know?!" They hissed.

"How do you know?!"

"She told me!"

"Stop that!"

They stayed quiet for a while. Eddie looked at her thoughtfully.

"If it's not Argyle, then . . . "

Vickie sighed and grabbed his head. She pointed him at Robin. He gasped and then looked at her in annoyance.

"I was getting there," he said defensively.

"Sure, you were," Vickie laughed and released his head.

"Just so you know, I call dibs on Steve," Eddie said.

"You can't call dibs on a person," she said.

"Sure you can. I just did," he said with a grin and rubbed his stomach, wincing.

"Your scars hurting you?" Vickie asked.

"The pain comes and goes," Eddie shrugged. "You're not curious about how I got them?"

"I am, but I'm not going to question it if you don't want me to know," Vickie said. "Besides, I just met you."

"Yes, but I have this feeling that we're like Steve and Robin. Platonic soulmates and what not," Eddie said. "I mean, how do you think they got there?"

"Well, they were in Starcourt together," Vickie said.

"Ooh, so, you think shared trauma? See, I knew about Starcourt," Eddie frowned. "I don't think we have any shared trauma. I mean, I was once in a car accident, too."

"Really?" Vickie asked gently.

"Yeah, my mom died in that accident. I was in the car with her. She threw her body on top of mine," Eddie said, his voice catching. "We were coming back from Indie when this drunk driver came out of nowhere. It caused a pretty bad pileup."

"Was it on the road with the really creepy scarecrow that no one ever does anything about?" Vickie asked.

"Yeah. I guess you heard about it like everyone else?" Eddie asked.

"Eddie. . .I think we have shared trauma," Vickie said, tears in her eyes. "Me and my mom were in that accident. My mom also died that day."

"Shit," Eddie said and moved quickly to hug her.

They were interrupted by Robin and Steve coming over to check on them.

"Is everything okay?" Robin asked.

"Yeah," Vickie said, her face wet with tears. "We were talking about our moms."

"Oh," Robin and Steve said in unison, a look of understanding in their eyes.

"Vickie, do you want to talk more inside?" Eddie asked softly and she nodded.

Eddie put his arm around her as they walked inside. They ended up on the floor of the nearest bathroom, unknowingly recreating Steve and Robin's own special moment. They talked for a while until their bathing suits were very nearly dry. They talked about how wonderful their moms were. Vickie told him how her mom used to read to her at bedtime and how she used to make her dance on her feet when they were dancing in the kitchen. Eddie told her all about how he got his love of his music from his mother even though she never could carry a tune, but she could tell a story like no one else. They talked about how they wished they were still here, how they could tell their moms about themselves.

"My mom would love Robin," Vickie said.

"My mom would love Steve, and she would love the fact that Steve would probably be the one to teach her how to cook. She always hated that she didn't know how to do that," Eddie grinned.

They went on to talk about how they hated the fact that they had to share this trauma, but there was also some relief in knowing that they didn't have to go through it alone. Eddie stood up and clapped his hands.

"Alright, enough of this sad shit," Eddie said and jumped up. "I think we're officially soulmates now."

He put his hand and helped her up, hugging her tightly.

"Definitely platonic," Vickie giggled. "You remind me too much of my dad."

They left the bathroom and found that everyone had gone home.

"How long were we in there for?" Eddie asked.

They headed to the kitchen where Robin and Steve were cleaning up.

"Party's over?" Vickie asked.

"Yeah, everyone got tired really quickly. It was weird how quickly they got so tired," Robin said, and Steve nudged her in the side.

Vickie grinned and pulled Eddie off to the side.

"I just got a great idea," Vickie said.

"And what, pray tell, is cooking in that head of yours, Fisher?" Eddie asked.

"We should ask them out together right now!" Vickie said excitedly.

"Are you crazy?" Eddie asked.

"Come on, we both know that life is short, and we could kick it at any time. They're worth risking it all, yeah," Vickie said. "Besides, they can't reject us if we're coming at them from both sides."

"Hmm, I am not seeing a single flaw in your logic," Eddie said thoughtfully and grinned. "Let's do it!"

They moved back over to Robin and Steve.

"What the hell was that all about?" Steve asked.

"That was our first official platonic soulmate huddle," Eddie said.

"Oh, so, you guys are platonic soulmates now?" Steve asked.

"That's cute," Robin said, smiling. "I mean, you know as in, you know . . . You know what I mean."

"Wait, how are we going to do this?" Eddie asked.

"Well, I figured you would look at Steve, and then I would look at Robin," Vickie said. "Then we ask them."

Eddie shot her finger guns and then leaned against the island across from them. Vickie leaned against the island, looking at Robin.

"We want to know - " Eddie nudged Vickie as he continued to gaze into Steve’s eyes.

"If you guys would like to - " Vickie said, nudging him back.

"Go out with us!" They finished together.

"Well, that was fucking cute," Steve said.

"But I think we're going to have to have a huddle of our own," Robin said, winking at Vickie.

They couldn't move very far away, but they talked quietly for a moment before squealing and then jumping up and down. They calmed down and straightened up while wiping imaginary lint off of their clothes. They walked back over, looking serious.

"We accept!" Steve and Robin exclaimed.

"But you should know that you guys didn't have to become platonic soulmates just to ask us out," Steve said.

"I know. It kind of just happened," Vickie shrugged and grinned at Eddie.

Eddie took her by the shoulders and moved Vickie directly in front of Robin.

"I am handing you my platonic soulmate. Be careful with her," Eddie said.

"And the same to you," Robin said as she pushed Steve towards Eddie.

"Why does this feel like a drug deal?" Steve asked.

"Maybe it's because you're the best kind of drug, baby," Eddie said, kissing his cheek.

"That was a good one," Vickie said.

Steve blushed and squeezed Eddie's shoulder, causing him to wince. That's when he noticed that Eddie was slightly pink.

"Eddie! You're sunburned! I told you to use sunscreen," Steve said.

"I'm a rebel, baby," Eddie winked at him.

"Oh, so you want to get skin cancer?!" Steve exclaimed.

"I smoke too! Do you want to tell me about getting lung cancer?" Eddie scoffed.

"Yes! I only ever had the occasional smoke, and I quit," Steve rolled his eyes.

"Is this how it's going to be? You worrying about me?" Eddie asked with a grin.

"Yes!" Steve said, and Eddie wrapped his arms around him, kissing his cheek. "Plus, I'd rather you not have to use an oxygen tank in between makeout sessions."

"Fair point," Eddie laughed.

Vickie and Robin giggled before sharing a look.

"Dinguses!" They exclaimed.

"Our platonic dinguses," Vickie said, and Robin kissed her cheek, causing her to blush.

[the-jesus-pill]

Reading through this blog made me 100x more appreciative of my apostate parents for leaving the conservative churches they grew up in and raising my brother and me without religion.

Growing up, I didn't have a great understanding of what Christianity was or what being a Christian meant, so my parents often seemed weirdly bitter about what seemed to me to be a book club with fun little rituals. Looking back with more understanding and compassion, I can see that they were horribly abused by their parents and teachers and can appreciate the strength it took for them to end the cycle.

I hope everyone who is questioning their religion knows that they are not alone and that they have a beautiful future ahead of them - and if that future includes raising children, their children will be thankful for their choice to leave.

I'm glad your parents got you the fuck out of there! It's rare to hear about parents protecting their children from Xtianity but I am glad they exist and are out there.

[quasi-normalcy]

Star Trek series rated by horniness (as rated by me, an asexual, so you know its objective):

Star Trek: The Original Series - what is there to say for the series that invented slashfic, fuck-or-die, and Thiess's theory of titillation in costuming? The universe is full of greased-up pecs and scantily clad women wondering what is this thing you call...love? It's easier to mention the episodes that *aren't* horny. 10/10, for how could it be otherwise?

Star Trek: The Animated Series - It's a Saturday morning cartoon series from the 70s, and yet... 3/10, for the surprising number of scantily clad muscular guys

Star Trek: The Next Generation - Oh, we *start* quite horny; Roddenberry is keen to let us know that the android has a penis in the second episode; but then Roddenberry dies, and by the final season even Troi is wearing a sensible duty uniform. 6/10 for Will Riker, though

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine - We've got Quark's, where the women are scantily clad, the holosuites are for fucking, and the waiters give themselves ear infections from doing too much oo-mox on themselves. We've got Jadzia Dax, who has three hundred years worth of sexcapades in two genders and will tell you about them at the drop of a hat. We've got Bashir and his sad blue balls for the first two seasons. We've got Klingons breaking each other's clavicles to initiate coitus. And we've got an enemy power led by the perpetual mind-melting gangbang that canonically is the Great Link. 9/10

Star Trek: Voyager - Weirdly conservative in its sexual politics. I mean, it goes out of its way to stick poor Jeri Ryan in that body condom, and there's a whole episode about space whales wanting to fuck the ship, and another one about Janeway wanting to fuck an Irishman, and *two* episodes about Pon Farr...actually, you know what? 6/10.

Star Trek: Enterprise - You know what, let me tell you about this series; this series is like a 14-year-old asexual boy boasting about his supposed sexual conquests in the hopes that it will endear him to the cool kids. It doesn't work; there's nothing genuine about it and everyone knows it; no matter how many innuendos he throws in, it's clear that there's no joy in it for him and he'd be happier if he could just go off and read comic books. Secretly, he wishes his friends still wanted to play with action figures. -1/10

Star Trek: Discovery - The show presents us with wall-to-wall gays who just...never seem to shtup each other. Like, I of all people know that sex doesn't define queerness, but...really? I guess maybe they're afraid of being less than wholesome? Anyways, 2/10 for that time that the Emperor went off to fuck a couple of Orions in the middle of a dangerous secret mission on the Klingon homeworld.

Star Trek: Picard - A series so sexless that it can't even show its main canonical couple enjoying each other's company for more than 5 seconds each season. And yet the chaste Jurati/Borg Queen pairing manages to be the hottest thing ever in the history of fiction. Anyway, I guess they technically had Agnes sleep with Rios in the first season, so 1/10.

Star Trek: Lower Decks - Oooh boy, we're at the heavy hitter now, my god. Completely, unashamedly horny. Gene Roddenberry *wishes* he could have done that orgy scene that people on Twitter were freaking out about. 11/10

Star Trek: Prodigy- They're *kids*. 0/10

Star Trek: Strange New Worlds - Not really a lot, surprisingly given their TOS pastiche. Still, we get some stuff with Spock. 3/10.

[whilomm]

i think part of the reason why ppl have a kneejerk reaction to others pointing out that marcille is kinda conservative (besides the usual desire to sand down characters edges to make them Less Problematic™) is that theyre thinking "conservative=republican" rather than similar to like, that girl who will swear up and down that she is SO progressive and 100% feminist and everything but when a girl doesnt shave her legs she says "ugh but its just so UNSANITARY" but at the same time if a guy DOES shave their legs she just "thinks its weird!!!", and if you point out the contradiction there ("didnt you say it was UNSANITARY to not shave? doesnt that mean you think ALL guys should shave?") she will BSoD a little bit and uhhhh i mean uhhh its just that–

or you know, someone who if you come out as a trans to her she'll accept it (after a bit of confusion and a few of the usual dumb cis questions) but maybe thinks that the way to ✨validate✨ you is to go all in on gender stereotypes like okay if youre a woman that means MAKEUP and DRESSES and LONG HAIR and ACTING LADYLIKE and PARTICIPATING IN GIRLY ACTIVITIES and NOT BEING TOO LOUD and NOT TAKING UP TOO MUCH SPACE. and if your a man that means dressing MANLY and HAVING SHORT HAIR and ACTING MASCULINE and TOUGH and BEING UNINVITED FROM THE (GIRLY) WEEKLY HANGOUT SESH

or people who like, will never outright say they HATE homeless people, like if you talk about volunteering at the soup kitchen or donating to the food bank shes like yeah!!! but then she also getting weirdly uncomfortable when it comes to actual homeless people who arent like, the model of 'trying but down on my luck', and just thinking the tents are unsightly and worrying about how if you give someone money on the street if they'll just use it for drugs and being anxious about the vague specter of "violence"

(im not necessarily saying "marcille herself would 100% do these things" but just "when people say marcilles a bit conservative they dont mean rightwing republican they mean like this kinda shit which self-proclaimed Progressives do when they dont recognize they still got shit that they picked up from living in a So Sigh Titty to work thru")

like, listen, a big part of marcille's character is that she is very prideful and sure of herself and her opinions. half of marcille's character building parts are "marcille has a preconceived notion! oh, someone challenges the preconceived notion! marcille is RESISTANT to this! oh my GOD this is AWFUL how could you CHALLENGE HER WORLD VIE- oh. oh wait no. okay you might have a point BUT SHE STILL HATES IT!!!".

she changes and she learns things! but shes kicking and screaming the whole way and kinda annoying about it and even after she has one thing challenged shes still got a whole backlog of other things she learned from So Sign Titty shes also gotta work thru even if she doesnt realize it yet. sometimes she gradually realizes these things on her own sometimes someone basically has to hit her over the head with the Very Special Episode about how halffoots arent children and orcs aren't evil and maybe shes treating falin a bit like a dress up doll and infantilizing her and like thats a problem maybe?

like. its an interesting part of her character! let marcille be a bit conservative. she aint perfect. actually theres a lotta little things she kinda sucks about. but its okay bc she can learn and have her tidy little worldview challenged and its interesting to see her go thru it all!

(and i also wonder if part of the resistance to people pointing out how shes a bit conservative in some ways is also like, refusal to admit "hm maybe i also hold some regressive views". like, the general thing of "wanting to believe you are already a perfect progressive and dont hold any shitty views" is extremely realistic, its defo a trap ive fallen into before! most of us probably have! but like, step one is admitting it rather than putting your foot on the ground and saying la la la i cant hear you)

[yandereend]

Hello!

So, I saw you liked one of my post so i checked out stalked your blog. I thought I’d share an idea I had! Feel free to ignored of course.

A Yan! Caregiver with a player/delinquent darling. Yes this was based on the Yandere cheater you wrote, sue me.

The caregiver is just a good person and took in the player/delinquent after their ex kicked them out for cheating. And they slowly became obsessed with always taking care of them after patching them up.

I really think that player/delinquent darling would catch on to caregiver’s affection and use it against them (I love when darling is an asshole), purposely bringing people home and making them as loud as possible to get on caregiver’s last nerve, knowing that caregiver is listening and seething.

Idk, just something to think about. I really like your work!

-Valentine

Omg thanks for writing this, tbh I was really down lately and I think I needed some distraction so thanks for submitting this 🙏

—————————————-

Yandere caregiver x delinquent darling

TW: yandere stuff, you know the drill

Btw English is not my native language so please keep that in mind

—————————————-

Yandere caregiver is the nicest person to ever exist they work as a teacher helping kids, help out in an orphanage in his free time and sometimes he goes to clubs looking for people who are feeling unwell or sad

Yandere caregiver saw you stumbling out of the club and throwing up around the corner

Yandere caregiver immediately walked over to you and asked if you wanted anything, he offered you water and napkins to hydrate as well as to clean yourself up

Yandere caregiver didn’t care that you looked at him weirdly for being so nice he was more fixated on your beautiful face

Yandere caregiver tried to talk to you offering to drive you home, but when you said you didn’t have a home he immediately saw his his chance and invited you to his house. And hey lets be honest who would refuse a free place to stay

Yandere caregiver’s house was big since his family was loaded, maybe thats the reason why he is so nice considering his sheltered upbringing

„Do you like the room? I hope it’s big enough for you…“ he asked looking at you as you stumbled across the room still a bit tipsy. „ It’s fine I guess“ you slurred lying down on the bed as caregiver put a blanket on top of your body. „Sleep well my love~“

Yandere caregiver was so happy to find you he always wanted to find the love of his life and now he was sure he found it

—————-

Sadly for him he was suprised by your behavior. I mean who would have guessed that you took so much advantage of him. First it was food and shelter, then you demanded clothes. And not the clothes he picked out, they were way too conservative for your taste you wanted something more sluty. But not for him, oh no it was all for the hot folks at the club. The fuck boys and bitches who would embrace your fucked up self as one of them.

Each night you bought another one home. You didn’t care if it was not nice you already know that your a bad person and Ethan was always so kind to you. He picked you and your new flirt up from the club, drove you home and helped you both get inside. You demanded his master bedroom a week ago and so you got it.

Now the magic happens. He dims the light to your liking fluff‘s the pillows up and even lit candles. He wants you to be happy my love. When you and your fling were done he showed the whore the way out and while he does the laundry he lets you relax in the bathtub. When you finally went to sleep in the early morning hours he watched his beautiful darling sleep.

He even enjoys your taunting the next day as you tell him that you know he watched you „playing“ with someone. Maybe a nice car would excuse his perverted behavior.

Yandere caregiver is truely the nicest person ever… maybe not when he kills the whores and fuckboys you call lovers in an disgusting manner or when he cums in your food before serving it to you.

But let’s be honest that’s a small price to pay for all the love and devotion he gives you. Maybe some day he can be your only lover…

—————————————-

Thanks for reading I appreciate all the support you guys give me<3 thanks again for again for the request and please leave a like or comment

Let me know if you want a part 2<3

[justanotherhh]

something i haven't seen much of so far is analysis of charlie's journey from the perspective of someone who also needs to change how she engages with others (vaggie too, but that feels more obvious as she's an ex-angel/exorcist and a sinner)

when charlie tries to help angel by confronting valentino it's been built to in the other episodes, because it's made very clear that she doesn't respect sex work -- she's got that "we need to save them from themselves" type attitude you see a lot with people who haven't done critical analysis into their own biases from a position of mildly-to-severe privileged disgust and haven't engaged with the perspectives of sex workers as people who can frame and understand their own experiences (whatever work they engage in and why they do sex work to begin with). same for her opinions on addiction

the scene where angel has to do a reenactment with sir pentious frames addiction as

something to be judged

something pitiable

something predatory

which isn't exactly a great way to bring angel onboard with the programme/make him feel less like shit. meanwhile the anti-sex + weirdly heteronormative attitude is also present in that scene by having sir pentious dress up as a virginal young girl in an anime-type school uniform with a big lollipop (the irony of this being practically indistinguishable from a porn setup feels very intentional), who declares that "she" won't be having sex before marriage as the great crescendo (sidenote, monogamy in the afterlife sounds.... like a long time to be monogamous......... yzma voice: "why do we even have marriage??")

angel, up until his duet with husk, is having it made clear again and again that the people seemingly helping him find the essence of his being inherently gross. he likes sex -- yeah there's the performance/face he has to wear to get through the day, but i think the bdsm club was a sincere suggestion and vaggie literally calls it disgusting/shoots it down without thinking about how to do so respectfully (again, she's an ex-angel/exorcist, she has biases of her own to contend with, but also the implications that nobody in heaven is having fun sex or negotiated kink and bdsm... tragic. do they even have a sex club called consent up there?)

charlie is a fairly conservative person at the beginning of the story. yes, she wants to help, but her framing of what "help" looks like doesn't take into account her own biases; presumably she grew up with the idea that "sinners are bad people" as much as anyone else did, if not more considering lucifer gave up on the sinners and that's been her environment from birth -- cut off from the people she's supposedly in charge of, but "hearing stories." (in both the pilot and happy day in hell she clearly has a fondness for the sinners, but it's as an outsider, someone who does not relate to them, and generally there's that overtone of "royalty doesn't know shit about what anyone is going through" which, charlie being a ruler, i wonder if that will be a focal point or just something to accept, it's not a dealbreaker for me, just something i noticed, esp as helluva boss has poked on power dynamics in hell along those same lines). the yearly murdering of demons is, likewise, something that is simply status quo and so even getting to a place of "hey maybe we shouldn't do that" is big and was inevitably going to create more cracks in the logic of black-and-white heaven-or-hell, so it's cool that that's where we the audience get to first meet her -- right as those threads are about to start unravelling

but at the very beginning, in some ways she echoes elements of characters like adam and lute (who are of course far more in-your-face, being villains) in her original assessment of what makes someone "a bad person" -- it causes her to create a system that doesn't actually work, and then of course the hotel is destroyed, but next time they'll build it to be better! (metaphor *jazz hands*)

why is angel in hell, is the question later asked. is it because he was/is an addict? because he drinks? because he does sex work? because he likes sex? (it may be because he's killed people/was in the mafia, but we don't have all the context yet, for now those are the things people know in the story itself) at the beginning charlie isn't asking the right questions, questions that would need her to go into herself and challenge her own biases, but throughout season 1 she goes from merely proclaiming that "everyone" can be saved, to sincerely challenging the idea of "needing to be saved" from things that shouldn't be judged in the first place. "if angels can do whatever and remain in the sky." yeah, how are we stipulating what's allowed and what isn't hmmmmmm? stay tuned for s2

(and youknow, apologises to angel for overstepping his boundaries, so it's not like angel doesn't know that she does care for him, ep4 gives a lot of development for their relationship as well -- it's the tipping point for a lot of what comes next)

interested to see how that challenging will continue in s2. she's gone from "we have to make you into a good person by cutting out things that make me (and others) uncomfortable from a conservative/purity-based judgemental framework" to "why do we have these systems of judgement in the first place?"

tl;dr angel changed a looot in s1 but so did charlie. she understands better now that the work she's doing is going to look very different from what she'd first anticipated, and poking at her own biases in relation to angel helped that journey and brought her closer to actually understanding and relating to the people around her

(there's another element here about charlie and vaggie as queer women in this particular universe, but it's a slight tangent so... different post)

[doubleca5t]

I know you got surgery but like. What's a good way to fake having boobs before then?

I wouldn't be able to tell you b/c I never found a good way to fake boobs lol. I just stuffed socks in my bra and wore high cut tops to hide it that's why if you look at all my old pics I dress like weirdly conservative I wasn't trying to be modest I was hiding the fact that I was too cheap to buy a breastplate kekw

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for distancing myself from my partner?

I, (17NB) and my partner (17NB) had a rough year. Thier family is super religious, and so is the place we live in, and we've had many fears about being outed. My family is less religious and I mostly raise myself so admittedly he's a lot more paranoid, and rightfully so I'd say. But ever since we've started dating I've had to ask them multiple times to improve thier communication.

To start off, I wish they were upfront, or atleast more firm about us breaking up, atleast in the first year. That wouldve solved a lot of heartbreak if they didn't want to be with me.

They dodged the question of physical intimacy of literally anything more than holding hands or cuddling multiple times, and yet mentioned they were ace offhandedly to a friend instead of giving me a straight answer (which I wouldve been fine with, I just wish they told me.) They tend to get angry quite easily and resort to snappish/ short answers, and, especially since them having a conversation with thier mom questioning thier sexuality, tend to abhor the smallest inkling of physical contact or sign that we're together, even if we're around friends who know, or alone.

After the conversation with thier mom, they asked to break up, but i basically pleaded for another chance and they agreed. I know it's my own fault at some point for beating a dead horse, but I recently had a conversation that kind of snapped the rose-tinted glasses right off.

We were discussing our futures, and there's a somber agreement neither of us will see each other again after school. Thats not what I'm upset about. They described having kids in a hetero marriage and joking to thier kids about the "wild" stuff they got up to in highschool like experimenting in a queer relationship, basically saying our entire 3 years of dating was a fluke or joke or experiment.

I realised this was the straw that broke the camel's back, they didn't really initiate or seem as eager as me about the sparse times we could go out alone together, they gave me a half finished craft I had to sew myself while I gave a painting for valentine's day, and various examples of bad communication. They're a good friend, I'm not so sure about partner.

So, I'm kinda trying to stop this year. I stopped frantically calling in school and rearranging lessons to be with them, I didnt spam text or think about making any gifts so far, I asked to have a..spicy experience with a friend or two (that my partner agreed with me doing). In my head I guess I told myself that we might call ourselves partners but the word just lost its meaning for us both.

So far, it's okay. It hurts, because it seems more like we're just friends instead of dating, but I want to focus on myself and my studies to get out of our really conservative area. Still, I feel guilty and a little resentful. I know I should've just accepted breaking up, but we're kinda codependant. They and I both know we can't be without each other.

They love me so much, I know that. They've done so so much for me and dragged me out of a horrible place pretty much single-handedly, they're just not great at communicating or emotional maturity. Also, they seem to think queer people go to hell in some self-imposed notion of religious guilt, and when I express resentment towards religions that push homophobia on thier followers they seem weirdly defensive of it.

For context, I have BPD (my partner has, for a long time being my 'favourite person') and what I'm reluctant to call "severe" trauma but it's been described as that. I'm genuinly curious to know if this is a result of some upbringing-induced overreaction or if its okay to just kinda give up on my own relationship. Yes, I'm aware that the best thing would be to break up but I dont think I could ever leave them, for some stupid reason.

What are these acronyms?