#they do the WOOSH and PEW PEW and have the MUSIC

[captaingondolin]

was anyone going to tell me that Marc motherfucking Thompson of Thrawn fame read the (at long last!) unabridged audiobooks of X-Wing Rogue Squadron???

you need more pilot babes in your life. more wedge. more CORRAN MY DISASTER BABY. CORRAN READ BY MARC. TYCHO 'ANGST' CELCHU READ BY MARC. i'm kicking my legs up giggling twirling my hair

[drantlers]

Janna smiled softly at her junior. “Jinx, I truly believe Lux likes you back. You should be more confident. You’re totally a catch, you know.”

“Heh, thanks Janna.” Jinx was still nervous about confessing to her crush, but less so thanks to her Star Guardian senior. They’ve had friction in the past, due in large part to Jinx’s reckless fighting style, but Janna has become one of her closest confidants. “I really don’t know who I’d talk to about my crush without you, Jan.”

*meanwhile, on non-Star Guardian Runeterra*

“Bruh, you should have seen this Lux chick! Her hands were like woosh” Jinx made a woosh, knocking various instruments and tools and projects on to the floor, “and then it was all like pew pew! BOOOOOM! You know, not many weapons can compare to my kick ass friends of varying sizes, but this ladies light show is a top contender. I think I’m in love...”

Jinx rested her chin on her hands and swooned, before making a finger gun and throwing out another ‘pew pew’.

Viktor was stunned. His shock was soon replaced with the flabberghast and the shoutings of “How do you keep getting into my laboratory? Why are you telling me these things? And can you PLEASE stop damaging my equipment!!”

“Do you think Lux is into punk? I mean who isn’t amirite or am I ri-“

“I do not know miss Crownguard well enough to discern her musical tastes now GET OUT. OF. MY HOME.”

[oddsnendsfanfics]

Marry Me

Genre: Fan Fiction (Vikings) Pairing: Ubbe/OFC Warnings: N/A Rating: G Length: Drabble Disclaimer: a strict work of fiction, I own nothing except the original characters and the plot line. In no way am I affiliated to any of it.  

A/N: Because, I am a monster, who likes destroying Ubbe. Sorry. It probably isn’t as good as I had hoped, but here it is :) Thanks to everyone who helped me decide between Ubbe and Bjorn. 

Magnolia perfumed the air of the ancient church, the energy buzzed with happiness, and yet Ubbe sat with a scowl etched into his handsome features. His black suit pressed and his beard neatly trimmed, from appearance he looked put together and well maintained. If people could see the inside, they would see the real story.

Ubbe was crumbling apart and there was nothing to stop it. Eventually, he knew this day would come, but Ubbe hadn't thought it would be this hard.

Today was the day his once best friend, his childhood crush, his first kiss, his...well...was to get married. In a few short minutes, she would walk down the aisle to the man of her dreams, a man who wasn't Ubbe.

The first time she's came home with this guy, Ubbe had played it cool. All while secretly hoping it would never last, in his mind this guy was all wrong for her anyway.

A few years gone by and Ubbe had heard the news of the engagement, never losing hope. Engagements fell through all the time. Right?

And then came the wedding invite. Hand delivered, she had stopped by the house one Sunday, to give her neighbours and former playmates the good news. She knew that Ragnar and Aslaug would be home, their sons over for dinner. It was the perfect time to waltz in and break Ubbe's heart.

It would break her heart, if she knew that Ubbe was against this. When she had asked him to come, it had been out of love and friendship. She hadn't meant to tear him up or to rub it in. He was her friend and she wanted those closest to her to share the day.

Ubbe counted 75 people, including himself in the church.  Not much of a wedding, then again she was never one for a crowd.

Parties were never her thing, in university, she had spent her weekends at Ubbe's apartment to avoid cheesy dorm parties. He relished those weekends, spread out on the small living room floor of the bachelor apartment. Books and take away containers littering the place. They would spend hours studying, before taking a break to goof off.

Ubbe used to think she had life all figured out - for both of them. Even as kids, hanging out in the tree house his father had built, she would tell Ubbe all of her plans for life.

A good career, a loving husband, a house with a fence, a few kids, maybe even a dog. Little did he know those plans didn't include him.

Twisting the cap off of his flask, Ubbe tipped it to his lips, taking a long drink. He was going to need a little liquid encouragement, if he was getting through this.

"Ubbe," His father's voice jolted him from the fog in his brain.

"Hmm?" Ubbe asked slipping the silver flask back into his pocket, he knew better than to smuggle liquor into a church.

"I wasn't expecting to see you here." Ragnar slid into the pew next to his son.

"Why wouldn't I be here? I was invited." The carbon copy glanced at his father.

"Fair enough." His father sighed, his head to the side.

"Where's mom?" Ubbe tried to push the conversation along, not truly caring about the goings on that were surrounding him.

"She is up toward the front, sitting with your brothers. Come, sit with us?" Ragnar knew asking his son to join the rest of his family was a long shot. Ubbe being here was surprise enough.

Smoothing his hand over his black suit jacket, Ubbe furrowed his brow, his blue eyes hidden under the bushy eyebrows for a split second. "Nah, I think I'm good to sit here." He motioned to the pews in the back row of the brightly decorated church.

If he decided to get up and leave half way through, it would be easier to slip out from the back row.

"Suit yourself." Ragnar's hand clasped his son's shoulder. "Remember, son, you don't need to do this."

"Yeah, dad, I think I do." Ubbe licked his lips, craving another shot of whiskey. Watching his father leave to rejoin the rest of his family, Ubbe slid his hand into his jacket pulling out the cool metal flask once more.

He should have never come.

He should have stayed home, been miserable on his own.

He should have asked her when he'd wanted to.

Instead Ubbe had chickened out. Reasoning with himself that they were too young, she never would have agreed anyway. She never saw Ubbe as more than a friend.

Now, here he was, watching her - the only women he'd ever truly loved, walk down the aisle to another man.

Taking another sip of whiskey, Ubbe cleared his throat, as the honey coloured liquid burned on the way down. Glancing toward the front of the church he sneered at the man waiting for his bride. How dare he take her away from Ubbe.

Before Ubbe could get into too much hatred for the nervous looking groom, the buzz that filled the church hushed and the organ began to play. A woosh came over the crowd as everybody turned toward the back. A moment of truth, as the three bride's maids sauntered down the aisle. Their dresses crisp and uniform in the light shade of purple.

"At my wedding, nobody is going to look like a displaced cupcake." She would always boast to Ubbe. Ten year old Ubbe would roll his eyes, wondering why girls made such a fuss over silly things.

Mission accomplished, her bride's maids looked fantastic, if Ubbe were to be honest. Silence hit the church, as the music changed and the crowd stood in unison and awe.

In the door, stood a vision in white. The perfect image of what Ubbe had always imagined his future to be.

Watching her, arm and arm with her father, walk toward her new life left Ubbe feeling as though there was a crushing weight. A weight that landed directly on his chest. She was stunning, her dress tailored perfectly to fit, her hair and make up which had no doubt taken hours. Ubbe had always loved her classic beauty.

At the front of the church, the happy couple stood joined hands, as the pastor spoke. Drowning in his sorrow, Ubbe felt as though someone else was controlling his body when he quietly stood from the pew. Shuffling out of his seat in the back, he made a bee line for the heavy wooden doors. Pushing the doors open, not caring how much noise he made, Ubbe walked through them and out of the church.

His mother would be mortified and his father would lecture him later, but right now Ubbe didn't care. He needed to be away from all of this, away from the frustration or regret and his own pain. Pulling a pack of smokes from his pocket, he lit a cigarette with shaking hands and took a long drag.

All she wanted was a man to love, a man to promise her forever, and Ubbe had missed his chance.

@pathybo , @imgoldielikehawn , @sparklemichele, @titty-teetee , @kirah32 , @kduran04 , @badassbaker , @imyourliquor-youremypoison , @ateliefloresdaprimavera , @angelswannawearmyredshooz , @awesome-as-i-wanna-be , @lilu46 , @fuckyeahalexhoghandersen ,  @dani-si , @hoeghfabulous, @danicalifornia25 , @pebblesz892 , @whenimaunicorn , @lisinfleur, @sconniebelle , @imeannooffensebabybut , @fumblingthroughchaos , @angelaiswriting ,  @kawennote09 , @float-autumn-leave ,  @smutgoblin , @nickysurfer28 

[orsull]

do the ones that end in 3, including 3 itself

Thanks for asking, my dude! I appreciate it

3. Explain your username.Not much to explain here. I needed a new one since mrwolguy somehow attracted furries weirdly enough. I just liked the sound of it.

13. What would your super-villain finishing move be?I wouldn’t be able to do anything to a super-villain as I am now, so I’m guessing this is a pick-your-superpower-type question? I guess I’d like superspeed to punch the dude in the face a couple million times in a second.

23. What is something you collect?I was gonna say nothing but then I remembered that I have a small collection of gems I haven’t done anything with for the last couple of years.

33. Hit “shuffle” on your media player and tell me your favorite lyric from the song that comes up.I had to switch playlists since the one that was playing only has instrumental music oops.Deoxys battle (ORAS) - no lyricsThe rapture - Super Meat Boy - no lyricsMegalovania - Undertale - no lyrics22 songs later...Parachute - Otto knowsEh I guess my favorite lyric would be “We’ll be a miracle, to turn this world into one” (This song does not have a lot of lyrics...) because it sure would require a miracle to unite the people on this world.

43. Shuffle up a random song on your media player. Now tell me what ship/story goes with it.Song that might play when you fight Sans - UndetaleI don’t ship anyone in undertale so it’ll have to be a story.I started a genocide run in undertale to see what it would be like, but once I beat Toriel I felt too bad to continue...

53. Write a story in seven words.Magic woosh guns pew pew world saved!Yaaay wasn’t that a wonderful experience?

63. In an ideal world,  what would you like done with your body after you die?Well I don’t want to get the whole ceremony of a funeral or cremation but I also wouldn’t like to rot in the middle of nowhere so I guess I’d like doctors to loot my organs and then burn me.

73. What’s a song you hate and why?First one that comes to mind is Zoute landen (Salty countries) by some dutch dude idk. It was the hot new song a while ago and it’s dutch and I hate dutch music. But it was popular so everybody was listening to it and I’m sick of hearing it. If you wanna write a song just to have some fancy lyrics there, write a book instead. Get me some actual music to listen to. ... Sais the dude that only ever listens to game music. Oops.