Eurovision 2010s: 20 - 16
20. maNga - “We could be the same”
Turkey 2010
You could see it in my eyes, it should come as no surprise that the highest rock entry on this ranking is OF COURSE the avant garde rock entry. 😍
It certainly isn’t a stretch to call “We could be the same” avant garde because it’s an experimental extravaganza if ever there was, a rag-rag fusion of indie rock, industrial, hiphop and folk. 😍 More importantly one that WORKS. It’s really hard to put all of these genres together and not disturb the flow between each segment, yet that is exactly what maNga do. Their song runs like an oiled machine, supported by an excellent score of orchestral rock (the fiddle is an especially nice touch.) The snappy libretto keeps the ensemble well together, creating an atmosphere of pure coolness.
This brave and creative entry is further supported by an act that has a well-defined aesthetic and artistic vision. (another sign of good avant garde. Pay attention because we are going to boot a LOT of them near the top of this ranking). MaNga don’t need much in terms of staging (since their song is already excellent), so a clever combo of strobe light seizure + dramatic helmet removal (FEATURING ACTUALLY CUTTING METAL AWAY WITH A BUZZSAW) is all it needs.
FOR JUST ONE NIGHT
WE COULD BE THE SAME
NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY.
Eurovision is all about taking the hand that you’re dealt and running with it. maNga did exactly that. They weren’t vocally perfect but again, rock is a genre where it’s okay to sound unimpressive because the score will always out class you. They don’t have the best song, but again, it was something special, brave and inspired. Every small aspect of “We could be the same” comes together into a whole that is much bigger than the sum of its parts and for that, I shall always cherish them.
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19. Joci Pápai - “Origo”
Hungary 2017
[2017 review here]
I was worried that Joci’s NQ in the latest contest would tarnish his legacy, but if anything “Az én apám”’s failure at being entertaining only made me appreciate “Origo” even more.😍
Let us not beat around the bush. “Origo” is art. Like all art, it’s largely hit-or-miss. You either love this wonderful fusion of rap, self-references to Samuraihood and gypsy folk traditions, or you’re a unevolved troglodyte with subpar taste.😈 Lol I remember the music journalists and juries HATING “Origo” and... honestly, I get it. Yes. I can understand that deeply personal anectodes and proudly displaying your cultural heritage can fly over the heads of those narrow of mind. It’s fine. Not every song has complex meaning. You can vote for the “Replays” of this world at your heart’s content. ^__^
Music is at its core a form of expression, of conducting emotion with sound, of telling a story. We use words as a crutch for our empathy, but truly good music doesn’t need to rely lyrics in order to spread its message around. The true message always lies in the score. “Origo” shatters those language barriers by slowly,
but steadily
unfolding a melancholic and touching narrative
that strikes everyone silent.
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18. Krista Siegfrids - “Marry me”
Finland 2013
A WILD DINGDONG HAS APPEARED
Only logical we continue from artistic complexity to figurative cotton candy. 😍 but the same musical principles apply here as well, actually. “Marry me” has an upbeat tempo flanked by wedding bells that already carries its happy-go-lucky marriage vibe across even before the first words are spoken. 🤗 It is there to indulge and delight, which it does with all the zest and pluck you’d expect from Krista Siegfrids.
Anyway, I’m sure this will shock you but I FLOOOOOOOOVE Krista Siegfrids soooooooo fucking muuuuuch as a human and I am NOT backing down on my fanboyism. She’s one of the few Eurovision Alumni that ALWAYS makes me happy whenever she appears, either as a force of HIGH FASHION/UMK hostess or as a resident melfest flop queen.😍 HON SNURRA MIN JORD!!!
DINGEDONG EVERY HOUR, WHEN YOU PICK A FLOWER~
As it happens, “Marry me” is the perfect canvas for her over-the-top, realhousewifesque personality. "Marry me” just delivers non-stop: it has a light-hearted, infectuously catchy beat, doubles down on lyrical and visual comedy, carries a happy vibed with a deliciously psychotic undercurrent, supplemented a superb act featuring a groom-into-bridesmaids twist and some hilariously opportunistic lgbtq pandering 😍 OH OH OH OH OH
DING DONG!!!1!1!1!11!1!!
ps: this being the entry that caused TRT to withdraw indefinitely because they can’t get on board with some hot girl-on-girl action. STAY PRESSED LOSERTWATS!!!
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17. Laura Tesoro - “What’s the pressure?”
Belgium 2016
“YOU’VE GOT A STUPID SMILE 😄” -- Alexander Rybak, when praising Laura Tesoro during the NF. (😍)
Lol this is where my degrees of separation come in, because I’ve met several people that personally know Laura Tesoro and... with one exception they ALL fucking loathe her. 😍 (and aforementioned exception is her cousin 😍) The general concencus re: Laura is that she’s an insufferable conceited bitch. Now, this could have easily ended up terrible if LauraLaura was That Unfounded Girl but... um,
can we say she has grounds to be a bit high on herself? She was fucking awesome in Stockholm. If anything Laura’s diva id helped “What’s the pressure”. First of all, there is the admirable confidence with which she takes the stage and completely NAILS every twist and turn with minimal effort. This is pure performance TALENT and if you can’t see that you’re Helen Keller.
And second there’s the message behind “What’s the pressure”, which is uplifting and cheerful in the hands of a normal person, but when brought by a narcissist like Laura becomes a hysterical exhibit of concern-trollery: “HEY PERSON SUFFERING FROM ANXIETY ~I~ *NEVER* SUFFER FROM ANXIETY. LET ME TELL YOU WHY YOU SUFFER FROM ANXIETY AND I DON’T” (god what an obnoxious human 😍 LOVE HER. 😍)
All in all, I think Laura has the justification she needs to have an ego, something her aforementioned haters (begrudgingly) admitted after seeing her own the live twice.🤭 She is a living conduit of confidence juju, a performance wonder, a Diva trapped in the body of an antropomorphic labrador. Dynamite comes in small packages and Laura Tesoro is more lit than Chinese Newyear fireworks. 🎇________________________________________________________________
16. Hovi Star - “Made of stars”
Israel 2016
I’ll be honest, Hovi Star is one of my favourite human beings to ever participate in Eurovision.🤗 He has proven himself an UNSTOPPABLE force of sass, delivering interview gold on a terrifyingly consistent basis. There are enough examples, but the ones I’m going with are his impeccable Ira Losco Snatch Game and his hilariously petty, one-sided feud with Douwe Bob (Dutch reporter: “what do you think about Douwe.” Hovi: “Oh I don’t think about him.😊 At all.🙂 Ever. 🙃 *hairflip*” god what a King of stonecold putdowns 😍)
Having said that, even though I loved Hovi as a ~human~ going in, I was still caught off-guard by how much I loved “Made of stars”. See, you know what I think about stripped down power-ballads: I don’t think about them. At all. Ever. *hairflip*.
However, this fucking song
pulls all of my heartstrings
with mesmerizing efficacity.
“Made of stars” showcases the best of Israel: they excel at classical drama: well-choreographed and sentimental, “Made of stars” is a genuinely touching ballad which Hovi magically imbibes with the spirit of Conchita. He whips up emotional tension so thick only his wit can penetrate it.
As an entry “Made of stars” is very emotionally intelligent and so, so brave. It has clearly defined yet subtle undertones of homosexuality that make me feel represented and loved. It is staged in good taste, elegant, introverted and clever, yet accessible, direct and poignant. The middle-eight’s crescendo-into-starfall creates a bone-chilling moment of beauty, of pride, of empowerment.
For such a simple entry, it delivers a lot of great things, proving once more: it’s not what you perform, but how you perform it.
And this update spelled the end for Turkey, Hungary, Finland and Israel.
TURKEY
Not much to say, honestly. Turkey have three entries in this decade and two of them were good. They are a hit-or-miss nation for me overall, mostly because i LOVE them in the 80s and 90s and somewhat dislike them in the 00s. What mostly bothers me is TRT’s attitude towards the rainbow community AND their self-entitlement towards the jury vote/big five. Both are highly toxic and I’d rather they keep on sitting out until they’re willing to become a healthy part of the Eurovision community again.
HUNGARY
Hungary are a good Eurovision country and their statistics reflect that. Boggie of COURSE ruined it by being the worst, but she’s an exception, not the rule. They are a really good country for indie gems and hopefully they’ll get their shit together. Could make a nice outsider winner pick in the upcoming decade, who knows?
FINLAND
Finland is such an underrated eurovision nation. I mean, look at that chart, and then ponder on the fact, with 7 good entries out of 10, they NQ’d six times and that NONE of their four qualifiers reached the top 10. Finland are bullied beyond belief and it fucking needs to end.
ISRAEL
This looks more underwhelming on paper than it is in reality. Israel’s probelm is never the song. Their songs are nearly always good. The problem is the live performance, where they get their accents wrong (ie: Mei dying from wideshotitis, Kobi being reduced to a sobstory, Dana being a giant penis joke, Harel fucking up vocally and Netta being reduced to a parody of herself). They just need to lighten up more, which they did post-Nadav resulting in a few great entries, and Toy. Overall, Israel are one of my favourite Eurovision countries, and for good reason: when they are good, they are fucking excellent.
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finna ask myself these cause nobody else will
ASK ME THINGS
*SO I started writing these a long time ago and never finished them so I’m gonna just add all my answers (06/04/2017) in bold enjoy neethz
***EDIT AGAIN this is so wild... 3 years later.... I was so depressed, hated my relationship clearly, and hated myself? Writing on 4/10/2020 and starting at #49 first pass so I can actually finish and publish lol.
1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?
typical @richiericherson; good morning lol
2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?
4months datin; wow! 6 months dating :)
3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?
is this a joke? we’re both into them it’s coo; same answer as previous :)
4. Is your last name longer than six letters?
yee; same
5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?
sober; same
6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?
oh yeah HAHAHA; have i though?
7. What does your last received text say?
“yes”; have fun studying
8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?
a million and one; and a million more
9. Where was your last kiss at?
in ma bifs bed; my bed this time surprise surprise
10. When is the last time you saw your sister?
today morning her bitchass lives w me ; 40 min ago... still live w her bitchass
11. What do you drink in the morning?
water, a smoothie; coffee. ugh the deprogression
12. Where did you sleep last night?
my bifs; my bed
13. Do you think relationships are hard?
hardest; shouldnt be but they are
14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?
yeah probably work a little harder at the end of last semester; idk a lot i feel but i cant look back specifically and pick things out. i would change almost everything if i could
15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?
no that would be perfect; yeah we’d just hella yell at each other
16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?
both but sunny; both but rainy :/
17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?
my sister; same
18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?
pajama shorts; joggers
19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?
probably; yeah
20. Does anyone like you?
yee i hope so ; yeah
21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?
ummm lemme check.. yup 2 people!; still 2 hahah
22. Is the last person you kissed gay?
no hahaha; sometimes lol
23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?
not really there’s all love here; that dunt from hs lol
24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?
yeah just let sarah give me one; can’t believe it’s been 2 months
25. In the past week have you cried?
yeah im weirdly pmsing or im depressed cant tell which; LMFAOOOOOOOO IM SO PREDICTABLE. literally sitting here crying... still dont know if it’s pms or depression
26. What breed was the last dog you saw?
golden :) great dane
27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower?
out out out; out
28. Have you ever kissed a football player?
no i wish; still wish but tbh i probably have
29. Do you think you’re old?
not at all; TOO OLD BUT TOO YOUNG IDK
30. Do you like text messaging?
not at all; grown to like or tolerate ig
31. What type of day are you having?
stressful cause orgo quiz soon and i know nothing; a normal day.
32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?
already have it pierced!; sameee
33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?
cold i think; cold ? ugh idk
34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?
yes my bf; my dad.
35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?
idk about this one tbh.... probably relationship; relationship
36. Are you a simple or complicated person?
both; i try honestly i try
37. What song are you listening to?
none; redemption
38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?
mostly no... lol i say sorry to ease the situation; nah
39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?
not even close lol
40. What made you start liking the person you like now?
i was lonely.. peer pressure...
41. When did you last receive a text message?
like just now
42. What is wrong with you right now?
idk i want it to stop though. i want overall sadness to stop .
43. How well do you know the last female you texted?
p well she’s one of my bffs at wayne
44. Does anyone disgust you?
yea fam almost everyone lol
45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?
no considering i have a bf
46. Are you in a good mood right now?
i wish
47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?
simran
48. What color shirt are you wearing?
black. did u even think differently ?
49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?
Probably something bout swap
50. Anyone you’re giving up on?
Tryin to give up on swap, giving up on Frank
51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?
Yes.
52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?
Swap? Def DONT want him back but can’t let him go
53. Do you like rain?
Yes
54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?
No unless they’re crazy on it aka swap
55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?
Probably
56. Do you like to cuddle?
So much..... with Y only
57. Are you shy?
Nah
58. Do you get along with girls?
Yes! I think
59. Have you dated the person you texted last?
No... well kinda? I guess I’ve dated Alex
60. What do you carry with you at all times?
Chapstick, my animal print scrunchie
61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?
Yeah
62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?
Yes
63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?
Unfortunately
64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?
Yas
65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?
Yeah, all the boys I’m talking to supporting me lol
66. How old are the last three people you kissed?
23/22, 28, 24?
67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself?
Pay
68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?
Leopard
69. Do you have any stickers on your car?
Hell no
70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?
Weezy f baby
71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone?
Android ugh miss mine
72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?
Wowwwwwww probably the last year
73. Do you like diet soda? Nah
74. What color are the walls in your room? Blue w stars
75. Are you 16 or older? Yes
76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? I used to
77. Do you have a job? Yes being a Med Student
78. What are your initials? NUS
79. Did you ever have braces? Nope
80. Are you from the south? Yup south INDIA
81. What does your last status on facebook say? Supporting Michelle and sharing her article
82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? No lmfao Meiyan
83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?
Probs mom
84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics? No
85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? Ugh idek something w swap?
86. Do you smoke? Yes
87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops? Flip
88. Is your phone touch screen? Yes
89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly? Wavey
90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? Hell yeah
91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool? Lake
92. Have you ever made out in a car? Yes
93. …Had sex in a car? Yesssss best sex ever ugh
94. Are you single or in a relationship? Single
95. What were you doing last night at midnight? Sleeping
96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? July 4?
97. Do you like the camera on your phone? No
98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? Yes
99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? Yes
100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? Yes
101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? Yes
102. Name your favorite Kesha song: Bro no
103. Do you have any tan lines right now? Yes kinda
104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? Yeah if I was going to faster horses lmaoo
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