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bqstqnbruin · 4 years ago

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F is for Friends - part 3

Whoops I'm in class rn but I just finished part 3 so here it is! I think this is the longest part so far, but not much longer than the others, so have fun.

But yeah, ignore typos, I might fix them eventually, but knowing me, I'll miss them so call em out if you feel like it.

Read the other parts here: Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 4

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“I don’t get why it has to be him, though,” Keelan whines on the other end of the phone. You did the stupid thing and reminded him that Nolan and some of his teammates were visiting your classroom to do a lab with your honors kids today, and he reacted exactly how you expected him to while you were driving in that morning.

“Because Anderson is an ass and Nolan volunteered.”

“Ok, but why Nolan?” he asks, saying his name like it was cursed

“Because when I called Tom Holland he said he was busy.”

“You know what I mean,” he mumbles.

“No, I don’t.” Yes, you did, but you weren’t about to tell him that.

“Why couldn’t you have invited Fran and Lindsey?”

You sigh, pulling into your parking space outside the school, Javier already waiting for you by the door. “Because they had to be prominent and I don’t think anyone needs the two of them trying to do an experiment. Now, I have to go, Nolan and the guys will be here after lunch, I’m already fucking nervous because of Anderson. I love you, goodbye,” you tell him, hanging up before he can get another word in.

“Are you ready?” Javier asks, handing you the cup of coffee he had picked up for you, waiting outside by his car like he did every morning.

“I almost threw up, like, five times getting ready this morning and Keelan is being an ass about this,” you huff, struggling to swipe your ID to get into the building. “Why isn’t this working?”

He takes the ID out of your hand, flipping it around in his fingers before swiping it himself. “Holding it the right way might help.”

You take it from him, clearly annoyed. “If this is any indication as to how the rest of the day is going to go I’m quitting and looking for another job at 3 pm.”

“So you’re not going to be dramatic today, I see,” Javier jokes, earning a glare from him as the two of you walk up to your classroom, greeting students as you passed by them in the halls. “Hey, listen. You’re a great teacher,” your friend assures you once you unlock your classroom door. “You’re going to be fine. If you need me, I have my free period during your first class they’re here, and I think Charlie has a free period during your second if you still need someone to run interference when Anderson is there.”

“Thanks,” you tell him, turning into your classroom to get ready for the day. Your phone was buzzing with texts, some angry from Keelan about what he was now referring to as ‘the neighbor situation,’ and one from Nolan asking you to confirm yet again where they were supposed to go.

“Are you buying lunch today?” Javier comes back into your room with his own to stash in the fridge that was in the back corner of your class. It wasn’t yours, nor was it for food technically, but that didn’t stop you and Javier from stashing your lunches in there instead of walking down to the teacher's lounge on the other side of the school.

You sit there for a minute, trying to remember if you even grabbed it when you were heading out the door that morning. Between Keelan busting your ass about Nolan, thinking of the lesson the lab that you were doing that afternoon, and just the general morning antics of getting out the door on time, you left your lunch bag on your kitchen counter. “Is there still a box of cereal in there?” you ask him when he opens the fridge.

“Yeah.”

“That’s my lunch then,” you say, keeping it in there so it wouldn’t be exposed to chemicals or attract any sort of rodent or vermin that you had no desire in dealing with. You knew today was going to be hell, and you weren’t even prepared for the college prep kids you were going to see during the second and third periods. You do your best to scramble and get everything you needed, thankful for the first time that you were giving them a test that you could grade during lunch and last period (and honestly, at home since that’s where most grading took place) instead of having to worry about teaching them when your mind was occupied by your honors lesson that day.

By the time your college prep kids were done with their tests, you were trying to mentally prepare for the lab, only to freak yourself out. Your computer dings, right before the bell rings, a message from Anderson saying that he would be stopping by during the second period to observe since ‘it was his job to make sure you were doing well as your superior.’ God, you hated him. The bell for lunch rings, your students filing out of your room as you grab the mug you kept on your desk and poured as much cereal into it as you could.

Javier comes back into your room, grabbing his lunch and plopping himself down at the table, eating his lunch as the two of you fell into conversation as you always did. Not even five minutes in, your classroom phone rings right as you hit print for the instructions you wrote up for the boys.

“Y/L/N’s room,” you answer, the school’s secretary telling you that the guys were in the office waiting for you. “Oh, wow, ok, I’ll be right down.” You hang up, throwing your hair into a bun, and grab your mug of cereal. “I’m getting the guys, do you want to come with me or wait here until we come back?”

Javier comes with you, both of you practically running through the halls out of panic that your students would bombard whoever Nolan brought with him. You were munching away at the cereal as you open the door to the main office, seeing Nolan and two of the other guys in their Flyers jerseys, all of them looking awkward with their hands in their pockets, unsure of what else to do. “Hey, guys!” you greet them, Nolan the first to turn around. Fuck him for looking good and making your heart skip a beat. It’s not fair, is it? “Uh, this is Javier, one of the other chem teachers,” you introduce him once you collect yourself, trying not to focus all your attention on Nolan.

This was at most a crush. Just a crush on the boy who lived next door to you. Who was also hot and sweet. Just a crush that you shouldn’t even be thinking about at school to begin with, so who cares? Having a crush on a boy does not mean that you loved him or that you loved Keelan any less. Oskar and Travis introduce themselves to you and Javier, the five of you walking back to your classroom while you continue to eat the cereal, suddenly very conscious of how weird it looked.

“No Kev?” you ask Nolan, the two of you lagging behind the other three guys while they talk.

Nolan shrugs, feeling nervous to even be with you in the school hallway. Every single thing he’s thought about you in the last how many days started flooding back to him, something was telling him that besides the fact that he shouldn’t be thinking them at all, he shouldn’t be thinking of them in your school. “He said he didn’t sleep well last night so he was going to stay at our place.”

“Hey, Y/N, what are we doing today?” Oskar asks, pulling your attention away from Nolan once you get back to your classroom.

“The kids are going to be designing a lab where they have to use the ideas of limiting and excess reactant to get the desired product.”

“What does that mean?” Travis asks, Javier sitting back and watching everything happen.

“So you’re not always going to have a perfect ratio of chemicals, nor are all reactions going to go to completion where everything reacts with everything,” you start to explain. “Think of it this way: you guys have your roster of however many players, yeah? You need three forwards, and two bluelines out on the ice in a normal five-on-five. Say every line is locked in; it can’t be changed, you can’t move people around, you can’t have people playing with different players outside of their line, it’s always the same five people. If you have nine forwards and 8 defensemen, how many line combinations can you have?”

“Three,” Nolan answers you.

“Why?”

“Because you have enough defense for four lines, but only three lines when you’re looking at forwards.”

“Right,” you say, not noticing the looks that Oskar and Travis were giving Nolan, “so your forwards in this case, are going to be like your limiting reactant, your blueliners are your excess because you would have two of them leftover.”

“And what are the kids going to do?” Oskar asks you.

“I’m going to give them a desired product, tell them how much of it they want to make, and they’re going to have to figure out how much of each reactant they’re going to need to make that.”

“And they can do that?” Travis asks.

“Knowing Y/N, they can,” Nolan mumbles, his cheeks turning red.

Before you can respond, the bell rings indicating the end of lunch. “Well, alright then.”

The boys and Javier lean against the back counter, your students coming into your classroom as you tried to down the rest of your cereal that you forgot about while you were talking to the boys. You knew that you wouldn’t be able to eat during the lab given the chemicals, but you definitely had to eat something.

“Ms. Y/L/N, who are they?” Spencer asks.

You hold up your finger for him to wait a minute, some of your students knowing who they are, one of your girls going absolutely feral in the corner opposite from where they were standing. The bell rings for you finally start class, getting your 24 students to quiet down as they wondered what the guys were doing. “We have guests today!” you tell them in your cheeriest teacher voice. You were genuinely excited for them to be there, but now that they actually were in the same room as your students, your nerves were threatening to take over. “From the Philadelphia Flyers, we have Oskar Lindblom, Travis Konecny, and Nolan Patrick to do our lab with us today! And for this period we also have Mr. Emillion, and later Mr. Fitzgerald later, so we’re going to have a lot of adults in our room.”

You start explaining your agenda for the day with your kids, knowing that some of them were focusing on the boys more than they were on you. You get into your lesson anyway, starting with your review questions. “If you have a reactant that remains after the reaction, is that the excess or the limiting reactant?”

“Excess,” Nolan mumbles under his breath as one of your students says the same thing. You ask another question, Nolan answering again, Travis and Oskar looking between him and each other.

“So, since when do you know so much about chemistry?” Travis leans over to Nolan while you’re explaining the directions to your students.

“I don’t. Y/N already explained it to me.”

“Let me rephrase it: since when do you care about chemistry?” Nolan just shrugs, pretending like he didn’t know what Travis was getting on about. “Oh, come on. Kevin told us about you liking her. At least be less obvious about it if you aren’t going to ask her out.”

Nolan takes in a deep breath, “We’re not doing this now.”

The students go off to do their thing, trying to brainstorm the procedure when you go up to the guys. Javier was already walking around and listening to the students chatter about their ideas. “So, you guys can guide them through everything, don’t outright tell them any of the steps they’re supposed to have written down. Follow what Javier and I are doing, I guess,” you tell them, having to force yourself to look at Oskar and Travis instead of just Nolan. They nod and start walking around, clearly confused.

This was going to end very poorly and you knew it. Especially with Anderson coming in. You watch the four guys walk around, the three hockey players clueless as the students try to figure out how they can interact with them. You realize the copies you made for them were still sitting in the printer tray in the other room, running to get them before anyone noticed you were gone. You were so scatter-brained by everything today, adding to the general anxiety you felt going into the lesson.

You start walking around, listening to the students and guiding them as they needed you to, thankful that they were actually getting the procedure they needed without much difficulty. “Alright, it looks like most of you have the procedure down,” you say to your class, walking around and hovering over your student's shoulders. “Make sure that before you start, either Mr. E or myself have to sign off on it, then our guys from the Flyers can help you with the lab. Sound good?”

Your students all agree, calling you and Javier over to read through their procedures so they can start. You were getting more nervous over the threat of the bell ringing soon and knowing that Javier had to go and teach his class, leaving you alone with the boys when Anderson came in to observe, too. You were running around, trying to scan through the procedures to make sure they were right so they could start working after the bell rang.

The bell sounds, your students starting to get chaotic, “Alright guys, you can take a break now or once you get your reaction heating, but not both. It’s up to you but you get five minutes either way.”

Some of your groups leave to go hang out in the hallway while their other friends move to their next class, some of your students get right to work with their lab goggles to start mixing. You were just waiting for Anderson to come in so he could rip you to shreds for whatever he felt like today.

“Hey,” Nolan says, taking you out of your trance. “You’re doing fine.”

“This experiment has to go well with the three of you,” you tell him, watching Oskar and Travis trying to help some of your students. Trying was the keyword there, but the students looked like they were having fun teaching the guys what to do.

“You’re an awesome teacher, it’s going to go well. Look at them. They know exactly what they’re doing and you barely had to tell them. That’s a great teacher,” you hear him say. You give him an unsure look. “Come on, would I lie to you?”

You shrug, a smile on your face. You could feel the heat rush to your cheeks as he scoffs when you tell him, “I don’t know.”

“Miss Y/L/N! Nice to see you!” you hear that voice calling you when the bell rings, all of your students filtering back in and getting right to work, knowing that Nolan heard you start mumbling under your breath as soon as Anderson appeared in your doorway.

“Hi, Mr. Fitzgerald,” you say, fake sweetness dripping in your voice when Anderson comes right up to you. “Class, say hi to Mr. Fitz!” you call him the nickname you knew he hated.

He looks around your room, trying to see who you brought. The fake smile he had plastered on his face drops when he sees the three guys. “You know the Flyers?”

You tried your hardest to hide the obvious smile on your own face, seeing the anger build inside him knowing that you had someone more impressive to work with your students. You shrug, “Yeah. Nolan here is my neighbor,” you introduce him, Nolan offering up an awkward wave, “I mean, they aren’t the president of a school in a university, but I think the students are having fun.”

“So what are the students doing?” Anderson asks, his face red with jealousy that you brought the boys.

Nolan walks away, as you start to explain that your students are going to make zinc chloride from an anhydrous copper chloride and solid zinc solution. He had no idea what it meant, but he knew that it was a silver piece of metal with a blue solid that you dissolve in water and it’s supposed to create a milky-looking liquid.

He starts walking through the class, listening to your students as they do the experiment, even though he still had no idea what they were talking about. One of your students was sitting in the corner, watching everything happen around him but not participating. “Hey, bud,” Nolan approaches him. “How’s it going?”

The student just nods, not taking his eyes off his paper while his partner does the rest of the work.

“I’m Nolan,” he says, sitting down next to the child. He watches the other student continue to mix the solution to get it to react. “So you let that sit now, right?”

“Yep.”

You and Anderson stand and watch the students, Anderson saying something about how the experiment was going, but you weren’t listening to him at all. You were making sure your students were doing what they needed to, working on the additional practice problems they had while the solution was sitting, seeing them get out the hot plates and set them up for when they would need them later, interacting with each other.

“Anderson,” you say, cutting him off once you see Nolan in the back corner, “look.”

He follows your gaze to Darren, your student who normally didn’t say a word, talking with Nolan and explaining everything to him. Nolan had a huge smile on his face that mirrored Darren’s and his partner Sydney’s. “I’ve never seen him talk with someone before,” Anderson says, dumbfounded. You knew Darren had been assigned to your class because Anderson wanted to see you work with ‘an unworkable student’ as you had overheard him telling Javier at the end of last school year. Darren was laughing with Nolan and Sydney, doing the work and actually helping his partner more than just doing the work on paper and passing it over to Syd like he normally did.

You both stand there, watching the three of them interact. You had a huge smile on your face, feeling the heat rush to your cheeks when Nolan looks away from the students and smiles at you, Darren holding up the beaker with their pale blue solution in it to show you. You give them a thumbs up, turning to Anderson and boasting, “I think they’re doing well.”

Anderson mumbles something under his breath, probably for the better since you had a feeling it was something about you as a general person.

You scan the room again, watching Travis and Oskar interact with the students, still not really sure what they were doing, but they all had smiles on their faces, so you couldn’t complain. You leave Anderson, walking around the room, making sure your students were doing ok. One of the groups asks you a question about the review worksheet they were doing, leaning against the table to help them. You listen to them talk through the problem, seeing Nolan staring at you out of the corner of your eye. Why couldn’t you focus on your students when he was right there?

You look up at the clock when you finish with that group of students. “Alright, y’all,” you get their attention, “Eyes on me for a minute. We have ten more minutes before the bell rings, which means we need to be cleaned up by then so you guys can get to your next class. You can leave the mixtures on the hot plates if they aren’t done heating and I will watch them. What I want one person to do right now is get a paper town and write you and your partner’s names on it and put it on the back counter for them to cool and we can mass them tomorrow, ok?” Your students agree and start scurrying around the room to do what you told them.

You move out of the way, going back to Anderson. “I’m impressed,” he says, a hint of genuine shock in his voice.

“Oh, really?”

Before he can answer, you hear something drop, the distinct sound of glass shattering on the floor. “No one move!” you say, all of your students halting as you try to figure out who dropped what.

Your student Nina waves you over as you rush to get your dustpan and brush, Anderson rushing over to help you clean up. “Are you alright?” you ask her.

“I cut my hand a little,” she lets out, showing you the scratch on her finger.

Anderson cleans up the glass, the rest of your students careful not to break anything else. You knew something had to go wrong. The day was going to perfect for something to not ruin it. “Let’s clean you up.” You help Nina wash her hand, making sure none of the chemicals got on her as you search for a bandage. “Was that the beaker with the zinc chloride?” She nods, you see a tear threatening to roll down her cheeks, knowing that she just ruined the product they had spent the entire period making and heating. Nolan watches you comfort her, feeling his heart flutter at the sight of you bandaging up your student. He pictured himself coming home after a game he got a fight in, you being there and helping him clean up a little more.

“Dude,” Travis whispers, scaring Nolan out of his fantasy. “You’re drooling.”

He waves him off while he watches you comfort your student who had started crying. “Hey, Neen,” you coo, a smile on your face, “It’s ok. Accidents happen. Remember I told you I was a lab assistant when I was in college? I can’t even count how many things I broke during one semester, let alone the entire time I was in the lab. We worked on the motto: if you break things that means you’re working hard. The harder you work, the more you break.”

“But we have to redo it,” she lets out.

You give her a nod, scrunching your face up. “Yeah. But if you get it started I can watch it heat. Do you have a class next period?” She nods. “Alright, hey Spencer?” you call over Nina’s partner, “Come here for a sec? Do you have a class next period?”

“Yeah. But I have a free period first period tomorrow. I can come in then.”

“Ok, here’s what we’re going to do,” you start, “Tomorrow, Spencer is going to come start the experiment, then Nina, do you have a free period at all?”

“Second period.”

“Perfect! Spencer will get it started, Nina will finish it, and if it’s not completely dry by class, I’ll give you an extra day to do the calculations. Sound good?”

They both nod, the bell ringing as you tell your students goodbye. That had to be the most stressful double period of your life, thanks to all the men who had to be in your room with you, the fourth of them now standing there staring at you.

“Not bad, Y/L/N,” Anderson says. “Only one thing broke. That’s gotta be a new record for you.”

He leaves before you could protest, your mouth hanging open even though you weren’t sure how you could even rebuttal his statement. You look at the three guys, Nolan looking significantly more upset than he probably needed to be. “That’s the first time something’s broken in three months.”

“He really is an ass,” Nolan says, grabbing a seat at one of the tables.

“I told you.”

“So, uh,” Travis starts, looking between you and Nolan. “Do you have another class or anything?”

“Nope. I have my last period free, but I have to go to the library in case any chem students need tutoring. You guys are free to go. I really can’t thank you guys enough. I’m not sure what I could ever do to make it up to you, but anything. This was huge,” you gush, really meaning it. The students loved it, and other than the one beaker breaking and Nina’s slight break down as a result, it went really well. You had done the lab in the past where the students had to redo the lab three times before it even worked, this time, you only saw one group redo it one time.

“Yeah, Nolan can probably think of something,” you thought you heard Oskar mumble, Nolan glaring at him. “We should get going, then.”

“Actually, Y/N, do you mind if I get a ride home with you?” Nolan asks as you gather your things to head down to the library. “You know, so they don’t have to go out of their way to drive me home?”

Travis’s mouth hangs open, a stupid grin on his face as he nudges Oskar, both of them looking at you as you’re clearly caught off guard. “Uh, yeah sure, we just have to go to the library, like I said. Are you sure you want to stay? I won’t leave for another hour and a half.”

“Yeah, I do,” he tells you, his cheeks bright red.

“Ok, um, you guys go back to the main office and sign out, I’ll just call down and tell them you’re staying?”

Travis and Oskar leave after bickering over something with Nolan that was out of earshot for you. Why would he want to stay? He had mentioned that Travis didn’t live that far away, so the ‘going out of their way’ argument seemed invalid.

You shake it off, leading Nolan down to the library. “You did a great job with Darren, by the way.”

He shrugs, taking the seat across from you at the empty table you found. Students were walking around, you hopeful that none of them would need help from you. “He’s a good kid.”

“I’m so excited to tell his mom about today,” you say, typing away on your computer. You look up, reading Nolan’s confused expression. “Getting Darren to talk in the class has yet to be successful for me. His mom asked me at the beginning of the year to tell her whenever he has a good day. I’ve never seen him talk that much and genuinely enjoy it.”

“Do you email all the parents when their kids have a good day?”

You shake your head, “I try to. High school kids, because they’re teenagers, don’t always get the praise and excitement from adult figures in their lives because they’re in that period of ‘you’re still a child and are treated as such but are expected to act like an adult.’. Even if it’s something small like they were participating a lot more than normal like in Darren’s case. It makes them more motivated and willing to learn if they know you recognize when they do something good.”

“Really?”

You force yourself not to make eye contact with him, knowing that you would see him blushing as he always was and that would, in turn, make you do the same. “Come on,” you say, pretending to watch out for kids who could be coming for tutoring, “don’t you remember when you were in school getting excited over the simple act of a sticker on a test you got a good grade on? I remember my senior year we were sitting in our world language class and everyone got an A on the test our teacher gave, and we all started begging for stickers because she had given them the last three years we had her. She was so annoyed with us, but every test after that, no matter what grade we got, a sticker was always on the test. It’s little, but it’s fun.”

“Teaching is a lot more than I thought it was,” you hear him say. Honestly, he wasn’t really paying attention to the words coming out of your mouth; he just loved that you were talking about something you so clearly loved.

You laugh, “Yeah. It can be a lot. You haven’t seen my college prep classes. Honors is a little easier because the students are slightly more independent in terms of their work, but my CP kids just have more needs for them to learn the same material.”

“What?”

“It’s the ‘lower level, but the difference is it just takes longer for those kids to learn the same information. So what we did today, I’ll probably do in a month or so with CP, and I would give them the procedure, either straight up or have them fill in the blanks depending on the child and the group.”

“Depending on their group?”

“Yeah. Each lesson has to meet the needs of every child, which means modifying and accommodating it based on if they have an IEP, a 504, which falls under special education plans, or if their parents request it or the student themself requests it but it’s not written. Like, I wouldn't interact with you the same way I would interact with Fran, or Maddy, or Keelan," or elaborate, swallowing hard at the mention of your boyfriend's name. " You interact with people based on how you need to interact with them and what their needs are. Kids aren’t one size fits all, so why should their education be?”

You kept talking but he stopped listening, hating himself for the realization that he came to while you talked about teaching, a soft smile covering your face while you continue to look around for students instead of looking at him: whatever feelings he had for you were more than just a crush, Kevin and Travis sadly being correct. He wasn’t in love with you, but he wanted, needed to be more than just your friend.

But you were still with Keelan.

The bell rings, signaling the end of the day, you and Nolan going back to your classroom until you were contractually allowed to leave. “So what are you doing tonight?” Nolan asks you. He wasn’t sure where he was going with this, but he didn’t want his day with you to end once you pulled into the parking space outside your apartments.

You shrug, looking around your desk for the tests that you had given your CP kids that morning. “Grading these,” you tell him, holding them up before stuffing them into your bag. He opens his mouth, about to say something when you get cut off by the sound of your phone. “Oh, it’s Keelan!” you squeal, Nolan’s entire body deflating at the sound of your boyfriend’s name. “Hey, you’re on speaker, I’m here with Nolan.”

He lets out a sigh before giving you a monotonous, “Hey, guys.”

“What’s up?”

“What are you doing tonight?” he asks you, Nolan’s heart dropping, knowing where this was going.

“I was just telling Nolan that I was going to grade the tests for my CP kids, why?”

“Can that wait until tomorrow, do you think?”

Running through your schedule in your head, you tell him, “Yeah, they’re not expecting them back for a week anyway.”

“Let’s go out tonight.”

Nolan could feel himself getting sick listening to this conversation, for no other reason than he wanted to be the one with you tonight. But he knew he couldn’t as he watched the smile on your face grow. “Where?”

“I want to take you somewhere nice, you know, treat my girl how she deserves to be treated. We haven’t had a date night in a while and I miss you.”

“What time do you want to go?” you ask him, your heart racing. It wasn’t racing in excitement to be with Keelan, but because you were suddenly incredibly aware of Nolan being right there as you were being asked out by the guy you were sure you loved.

“I’ll pick you up at five?”

“Sounds great. I’ll see you then.”

“I love you, Y/N.”

You hesitate, looking at Nolan who was no longer making eye contact with you. “Love you, too, Keel,” you force yourself to get out. You hang up, looking at the clock to see that it was thankfully time for the two of you to leave and go home, giving you around an hour to get ready by the time you got home and got as much ready as you could for school tomorrow. “We’re free to leave now, if you want,” you offer him, packing up your bag for the day.

He just nods, waiting for you at the door as you walk out to the car, driving home in silence, only a mumble goodbye as the two of you get out of your car and go inside.

Five pm rolls around, Keelan getting out of his car to greet you as you go running up to him. Nolan watches you from his window, knowing he was being a creep, but he couldn’t help it. You looked perfect in the dress and heels you had on, your hair and makeup done to make you look more beautiful than he had ever seen. He watched you run into Keelan’s arms, Keelan lifting you off the group as the two of you kissed, Nolan green with envy as he watched him get the door for you for the two of you to drive off to the night he wished he was experiencing with you.

#nolan patrick #nolan patrick imagines #philadelphia flyers #philadelphia flyers imagines #flyers #flyers imagines #nhl #nhl imagines #hockey #hockey imagines #f is for friends

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sunlikesdrawing · 6 days ago

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HI IT'S ME I'M @sunlikesdrawing IT'S ME (you guys already know me LMAO)

THE SECOND I SAW THOSE PASSPORTS I WAS LIKE "OMG YES OSKAR'S A BADASS REBEL" AND YES OF COURSE HE'D BE HE'S OSKAR!!??

I really hope he's doing ok😭 I wonder if when (if) Fenn found out about whatever he was doing (which I heavily believe is help Sonan's GET THE FUCK OUT OF SONA) he had the heart to rat him out or if he decided to just leave and consider him a traitor, OR, third option, he found out BECAUSE Oskar was caught. I hope he wasn't tho he's too cool and sweet for jail or whatever other punishment awaits traitors😭

Also my brain was so burnt today (for context I'm on 2 hours of sleep right now LMAO) and I didn't even notice about the dates, but a while ago I'd also come to the same conclusion of the year being 1914, so idk lmao

AND YESSS I LOVED THIS EPISODE, IT WAS ADORABLE, THEY WERE ADORABLE, I CAN'T WAIT FOR NEXT FAROFF MONDAY I'M SO EXCITED

ANYWAY I was gonna say something else but I completely forgot what it was so I guess this is it for now LMAO

Haven't thrown an essay to the other Faroff fanatics recently and the new episode had a LOT of writing material SO I'M BACK TO BE THE FANDOM RANTER ✊

I apologise for my recent absence, I'll try to get back to doing my long ass Faroff posts more frequently again LMAO

(Split below for spoilers on episode 75 of Faroff)

I see you have opted in.

AHEM.

First off, MORE SONAN GOVERNMENT LORE!? Apparently things haven't always been this way... I sort of got that implication already from how Tobias talked about the Supreme Lord, particularly the way he said that he'd been making stupid rules "since he got chosen", but this confirms that the same thing applies to Sona as well. It was recent enough that Oskar remembers it, but still long enough ago that Fenn doesn't... Which is especially not good considering that many of the soldiers are likely around Fenn's age, so most of them also probably grew up in this time of being brainwashed to the absolute max, not knowing there was any other option. Awfully convenient for the king to have all those brainwashed soldiers though-

The fact that there used to be better, more just leaders on both sides also leads me to believe that maybe this war started after the current Sonan king and current Supreme Lord took power. They're both pieces of shit, must be made for each other, yes?

Anywho, touching on another detail during this flashback... THE PASSPORTS. THE MILLIONS OF PASSPORTS BEHIND OSKAR... I believe I smell rebel action, don't you? Not that surprising for Oskar, honestly. My friend ( @sunlikesdrawing ) suggested to me this theory, and I back it up in its entirety: Oskar may be using those passports to help people escape from Sona. Frankly, if I lived in Sona, I'd want the hell out of there too.

But this leads into another theory (again, credits to @sunlikesdrawing , I would not of thought of this on my own-), what if this is somehow connected to Fenn's eventual falling out with Oskar? What if, maybe, Oskar got caught? What if he's in prison right now? Of course Fenn would think him a traitor for defying the king...I also wonder if this happening made him even more extreme in his beliefs than he was. Time will tell, I suppose.

Alright, I believe that is all I have to point out about the flashback! Moving on to the rest of the episode.

There is one thing in particular that stood out to me. If you've been following my blog awhile and possess a strong memory, you might remember that I've done the math with all the dates + visual clues we've been provided thus far and came to the conclusion that it must be currently March of 1914. However, when the song ends, the radio states, "...their music first rising to fame after performing at a ball hosted by the Olvindar pillar family in 1914." Typically, when saying something like this, if it was still the same year, you'd say "earlier this year" or something else to that effect. Saying it happened "in 1914" implies that the year 1914 has already passed. Perhaps I need to recheck my math.

Alright, done with the serious stuff now. I love that Oskar is a constant reminder to Fenn that what he's doing with/for Tobias IS the right thing to do, no matter what the king says. It's very lovely. And the fact that Fenn remembered him saying "sometimes you need to do things that are good for your happiness" and immediately thought of Tobias... I wonder if this sentiment will at all help sway Fenn in pursuing Tobias in.... Forbidden relationships... He is good for Fenn's happiness, after all. We'll see. 👀

P.S. Fenn has the most appalling dance moves, I had to turn my phone off for a moment to process my second hand embarrassment when he started trying to dance- Tobias being super hyped to keep dancing with Fenn was ADORABLE, these fuckers are literally holding hands and dancing and it's WONDERFUL- also the sneak peeks for the next episodes!?!? I'M SO EXCITED FOR NEXT FAROFF MONDAY HOLY SHIT

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captainsspnanon · 3 years ago

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C2E11 - Zemnian Nights

@suicidallyreckless, tagging as requested!

LET’S GOOOO. Will I finish this before C3 TOMORROW (now tonight) NIGHT. I have no clue. (I’m legit going to be trying to see if my essentially dead laptop can at least have word open so that I can type my reactions! I can’t do it on the current laptop because I’ll be watching full screen and I AIN’T PAUSING unlike how I pause the rewatches constantly)

Zemnian Nights….the title literally gives nothing away. I have no memories of what happens here, though from last episode I’m assuming that we get the start of the rebellion, first meeting with the Gentleman (no wait, Laura’s here), Fjord and Molly using truth spell on Nott…..fuck it. LET’S GOOOOO.

Emmy-nominated Sam!!!! I wonder what it’s like for them in the biz, how do they view award shows and such like that? I know the outside view is ‘popularity contest’ and such.

IT’S RAINING. AND IN C3!!!! WE’LL HAVE RAIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNN I cannot wait I cannot wait I cannot wait

:( Goodbye Yasha. AT LEAST WE GET YOU ALL TIME FOR C3!!!

Even early game Beau is such Expositor material. I love it so much. The hints were always there, we just watch it blossom!

I forgot Pumat BREATHED on Fjord! Good! Make it awkward! Don’t use him as a dry cleaner!

Does Molly ever actually have the periapt take effect? I know Caleb has it go off when he’s drowning...but I’m not sure if Molly or Cad ever have it go into effect.

SMUT. GOD their faces. LOVE THIS SO MUCH.

I forgot how much detail Matt actually goes into!

Awwww, the bakery scene with the bread-muff. I’d completely forgotten about it until I saw an animatic of it, and then it’s almost one of my favorite moments because it’s so small and so sad.

Honestly, watching this after having seen C1, I LOVE the pairings a lot more than I did in C1. C1 seemed to be you had your buddy and you had your romantic partner and that’s it. With C2, there are SO many relationship dynamics! I’m getting Empire Kids feels already, and they’re still super prickly with each other. And then you’ve got the Brjos, and then you’ve got the Caleb&Fjord stuff at the beginning, the Caleb&Jester relationship is great, Caleb&Nott is AMAZING, and then you’ve got the Beau&Jester relationship which is amazing, and I can keep going and going with the entire cast. They just feel much more interconnected with strong friendships then C1 did, which felt more distant, even though they were technically ‘closer’ with each other.

Aaaand nothing more perfect than me typing that thought, going back into the episode where Beau talks about just wanting to drink booze and make money, and Liam immediately goes “Insight check! ...One!”

Hello Mr. Skeleton! We know your story now! You’re a piece of shit!

OMG Jester is hitting on Fjord so hard, I forgot it started so early! “Nothing, Oskar. Don’t worry about it” omg laura ilu

Marisha’s little freakout about how she’s writing down smut and it has to be important is sooo fucking adorable

We find out that Crick is a slur through the SMUT??? I forgot that! I would have thought it’d be when they meet the Kryn dude in the sewers.

LOL the Dolan bit. And Sam doesn’t find out til wrap up that the Dolan handkerchief was just a random roll! XD

I forgot that the plan that the NPCs had was crap. I wonder if Matt always intended for the PCs to come up with a better option. Also lol at mentions of the Myriad. Unlike the Clasp, the Myriad came to nothing during C2, which I honestly preferred. (though to be fair I think the Gentleman was actually part of the Myriad? I THINK I read that somewhere, but could be 100% wrong)

“You can reply to this message” *heart*

Molly using magic on Nott to force her to tell the truth. It’s a dick move, especially considering Molly lies to fucking EVERYONE about EVERYTHING (I don’t even believe the story he claims about pretending to be royalty), but I actually like it? Like, it makes SENSE, and it’s a hell of an escalation. It doesn’t make me like Molly any more, but it doesn’t make me like him any LESS either. It’s just a hell of a scene, and one that Sam fucking acts amazing in.

“So he can save me”. Goddamn it Sam you really are so fucking amazing when you let yourself play scenes straight. Even Matt can’t keep a straight face during this scene.

“I did my own dental work” such a throwaway joke with so much SADS behind it!!!

...I didn’t remember Molly threatening her at the end of the spell. Very dislike. Fuck you Molly.

“Do you trust Fjord and Molly?” “No, no I do not” “Me neither” is SUCH a powerful moment for a few very short lines. SAM YOUR FACE. And then in comes Laura to lighten the mood!

I did NOT remember Fjord casting Crown of Madness on the guard!! Alright, so impulsive!Travis/impulsive!Fjord DID exist early campaign, and not just after Cad came in.

LOL Liam always wants to be Laura’s twin. That so fucking cute.

Hmmm, can’t figure out if the pacing in this is a bit too slow for me, or if I’m just not fully focused because C3 TONIGHT!!! Either way, I almost feel like speeding up. Not going to, considering I’m close enough to the end, but it’s there. To be fair, when thinking about C2, this is also a plot thread that I pretty much never remember, so it might just be one that doesn’t hold much interest for me.

Molly just mentioned about being content to make snap judgments (something I’m not thrilled with as a character aspect of his) but it reminded me of how on Talks Machina, Taliesin keeps thinking that there’s something up with Jester, that Jester is pulling the same game as Molly, etc. etc., and I just kind of love how utterly wrong he is?? He’s SO expecting to find more layered depth to Jester and it’s just like, nope! She is how she is!! And I love it so much, that THEY don’t know as well. There’s a comment he made in an earlier Talks as well about how he’s pretty sure only Molly and Jester have had sex, while actually everyone else has had sex BUT Jester (at least I’m pretty sure that Beau has, though it’s never clearly stated, I don’t think).

Fancybottom! The first of the Fancy-s!

I wonder if Ulog was always going to put in a ton of gold, or if it was upped because Matt could tell that they might not pursue the thread without it.

“At dawn, we plan?” oh fuck, yeah that went right over my head before I watched C1.

“Is it Thursday yet?” YES IT IS LESS THAN FOUR HOURS TO GO AAAAAAAA

@suicidallyreckless HA NOW THE TAGGING WORKED!

#critical role #the mighty nein #cr c2 rewatch #spoilers for c1 and c2

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tacosandtomcos · 4 years ago

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U pointed out the flaws, continuity errors & retcons in the magic book of spells? But were there any in the Star and Marco's Guide to Mastering Every Dimension since it came after season 2 & befor seasons 3 & 4

oh definitely

i guess as the current star vs expert, it comes in handy that i bought basically almost all the merch for the series. XD I own the stump day edition as well (Even though that episode is not very good)

it’s not as bad AS the book of spells, that one has way more contradictions and has the flaw of feeling like you need to own it to understand a lot about s4. But it has a few tidbits were you can tell there were changes.

one of my favorites was when they mentioned tom’s parents, cause as anyone knows, i was REALLY invested in meeting tom’s parents at the time. And well, obviously at the time we were under the impression tom came from an abusive family with an anger demon father tom hated.

and this seems to be reflected in the book.

but uh.....yeah, obviously this was changed AFTER the book because we meet tom’s parents and they basically never acknowledge this ever again.

You’d think “The big guy”, would imply tom’s dad is some important figure but like, wrath gets more screentime and more significance in the series in their two appearances then tom’s dad.

outside of his feud with river, he doesn’t get to do much that matters.

so they basically didn’t really do much to jusitify what all that was about, not that they needed to. but i feel like if his dad was originally obviously going to be important, and they changed it, he should’ve done something to reflect that because this mention of him feels weird now.

also there is a map in the book.

the jaggs, spiderbite, musty mountains and even some of those spots in the underworld are confirmed to hold kingdoms. But like, none of them are on the map for some reason? I mean i’d claim they were only showing the significant kingdoms but most of these kingdoms are around for one or 2 episodes at most, and river’s old kingdom doesn’t matter at all.

not to mention there’s a lot of these locations we don’t see anyone.

Not a contradiction, i just find it weird.

star also mentions for jackie that jackie was born with the teal streak, which obviously is not true because we’ve seen baby jackie . But maybe you could round that up to star being star and hearing rumors. (Also Jackie shops from the salvation army of this universe and i hope they’re better then ours)

Also, omnitraxius was made to keep the universe from eating itself, which uh.....now that he’s dead.....

oh fun fact, celena had the power to disarm monsters which her beauty apparently? that isn’t in her chapter but it is mentioned in this book.

also there is mention of this accord , the mewman/monster one, which i don’t think is ever mentioned much but maybe i’m forgetting. But toffee broke it apparently or something.

it’s even mentioned ludo’s family and the septarians have a treaty, which also is not mentioned.

oh yeah, still bothered pony’s trans sister literally never showed up in the show.

actually in this book they mention star’s marks changing shape in s1 is like, a legit thing, but i don’t think it ever comes back after s1.

Oskar had a freaking record, i completely forgot XDDD

Tbh you could claim all of glossircks section is contradictory but star says all the information she has is probably not true anyway so yeah.

apparently the ponyheads have indoor plumbing,, but i mean, mewni not knowing what toilets are then having plumbing already was a problem already in the show.

Pony makes a reference to henious’s marks which actually i believe she never sees before this point, so either that’s a bit of a contradiction or i guess we’re assuming she saw them out of the corner of her eye.

she also doesn’t know ludo is a prince, but i guess depending on how smart you consider her that can both make sense or not make sense.

The stump day booklet and the mewman settlers are not the same ones we see in the s4 episode, there’s no resemblance (they’re not pilgrims either for the record), though that can be chalked up to it being a kid’s book in universe and not remembering who these people looked like....there’s also like...20 of them in here compared to the four we saw.

you could argue the “Pic” they took of the stump day party also doesn’t make sense for the episode since that clearly doesn’t happen in canon. But tbh i think a bigger thing is the fact star has her wand XD Star didn’t actually have her wand in that episode.

star doesn’t remember skywynne made warnicorn stampede when the spellbook says it was basically the only chapter she really read for the queens.

Like i said, this book isn’t as bad, because tbh, it was made around the time were the continuity was a lot better, not perfect, but more consistent.

it’s a guidebook, instead of lore it’s focus is more on fun activities and small interactions between characters that aren’t technically contradicted by the series.

Probably because a lot involve characters we barely see after this book, so we can’t claim these small moments didn’t happen.

But there are some issues here and there, not enough to really “Ruin” anything, they’re mostly minor compared to the WAY more confusing ones the BOS has, but they are there.

Bonus though: The comic series was intended to be canon to the series, taking place between s1 and 2.

a lot of it is kinda contridictory, like marco’s amount of hoodies, these random mud people monsters that like never come back besides the time travel thing, but tbh the biggest one that i point out.

marco is allergic to cats in it, which is a plot point in the last comic they printed with marco’s earth pals, but like, this is never mentioned in the series and marco is around cats quite a bit

he met the same cat dimension with the human faces in s1 and wasn’t allergic then and def wasn’t in later seasons around babs cats or anything.

the comics probably aren’t considered canon now but felt the need to point that out since they originally were going to be.

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amasawaseiji · 5 years ago

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share your self care tag

Thank you Nico for tagging me!! @transking

favourite comfort food: I’m not picky with food so this is kinda hard ‘cause eating in general comforts me :’) but some that have the golden spot are raw carrots and chocolate. he carrots are betraying me though ‘cause lately I’ve been getting nausea when I eat them raw and it’s killing me.

favourite alcohol (or hot drink): I’m not a big alcohol drinker, my favourite beer is Ichnusa beer as for cocktail it’s a good ol’ fashioned bloody mary, but honestly I’m a big hot tea drinker, I’ll drink any and all black tea, flavoured or not, and I also have a place in my heart for red fruits teas and flavoured or unflavoured chamomile (especially peppermint chamomile)!

favourite relaxing activity: It definitely has to be listening to music, just,,, laying somewhere with headphones on, or with the stereo on blast when I can is even better. I also love doing clay sculpture a lot, I started because of school but I have taken a liking to it and it’s one of my favouritve activities, I have a block of 15kg of clay at home and whenever I want I can create something new, which in this case also goes towards my grades in school.

favourite fluffy/feel-good fic: Ooh this is easy, I don’t read too many fanfics but I have this one that I reread regularly ‘cause it’s just so well written and it’s the right lenght and I just like it so much. It’s called Blends, I’m slightly cringing ‘cause it’s a wolfstar fic but I swear it’s good, even though I’m not very involved in Harry Potter stuff for... all the reasons there are, this is still such a good fic.

favourite calming scent: I think there’s a lot, like seas and rain and jasmine flowers, baby powder, steamed vegetables, but maybe my top #1 scent is my brother’s shampoo’s scent that’s all over the house after he showers, it’s such a mundane thing that I’ve been experiencing for so many years it has become a reminder of the fact I’m home.

favourite relaxing or uplifting song: for uplifting songs I have a whole ass playlist on youtube and it’s not even remotely complete, and honestly yea it’s 98% kpop ‘cause that’s the music I listen to more often.

For relaxing I have an opposite playlist and this one isn’t finished either but I often forget to add songs because in this case I usually just put the song on repeat for hours on end so it rarely gets updated tbh.

But there’s so many songs that relax me, like Adam’s song and Bored to death by Blink-182, Saturday sun by Vance Joy, Caelum by Oskar Schuster (this one especially puts me in a trance, sometimes it gives me a headache lmao), Au dessus du volcan by Yann Tiersen, Cloud Atlas’ Sextet, The Handmaiden’s What’s with her, Dancing with eyes closed by Brian Crain and many others tbh, it��d be such a long list, but I’m always happy of talking about music of any kind!

favourite white noise: Ocean for sure! do wind chimes count as white noise? ‘cause those too, the buzzing of cicadas, thunderstorms, strong winds that make the windows rattle, cacciabombardiere airplanes flying over, it’s not really a pleasant sound but I’ve heard it since I was a kid and it has become... calming.

favorite book to get lost in: It has to be the Fairy Oak series written by Elisabetta Gnone, who is also one of the creators of the famous comic book W.I.T.C.H., it’s the first books I’ve ever read at age 7 and as a cancer I live off of my own childhood, so a lot of my favourite things are related to it lmao.

Honorable mentions go to basically all books by Licia Troisi, except maybe the newer ones, Pride and Prejudice and Persuasion by Jane Austen, Anne of Green Gables by L.M Montgomery, I wanna read the other books in Anne’s serie but I’ve been having a hard time reading anything so I’m not sure when that’ll happen, Cicely Mary Barker’s books on fairies have a big place in my heart but they’re monstly illustrations tbh, and I’m sure I’ve forgotten some books but these are already a lot.

favorite chill-out tv show: this one is kinda hard ‘cause although I watch kind of a lot... not many mean a lot to me? but some I really enjoyed are: Go Back Couple, this one made me cry kind of a lot, but I loved it, Sotus, it’s wholesome, I also love Sotus S, Anne with an E, I swear it’s so good and I really hope there’s gonna be a new season of it although it’s very improbable, the last one left me with some questions unanswered and I’m :( about it

These are some that came up in my head but really I think anything that’s in my #shows tag, also I have a MyDramaList account and a MyAnimeList account too although it’s way less updated than I’d like it to be, it’s just a bit of an uncomfortable site.

the best advice you’ve ever had: I have a short memory and I’ve probably recieved lots of good advice that I 100% forgot, but I guess it was my psychologist’s telling me to not put myself down when I can’t change a situation that is not up to me, and it’s hard to live by it but it’s important to remember.

Again thank you Nico this was fun to do! and again I’m not sure who did this already but I’m gonna tag @sunmorkcafe @iulovbot @altgulf @artisticgrroove @hatake @honeyvanity @diaxia @lqr so basically all of my mutuals, as always don’t feel pressured to do this and if you wanna be tagged just shot me a message or just say I tagged you!

#tagged

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thesportssoundoff · 7 years ago

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“The UFC Heads To Charlotte! Please Read? A little?” UFC on Fox: Jacare vs Brunson 2 Preview

Joey

Jan 23rd, 2018

The UFC returns to Fox with.....

I mean.....

Okay so this card isn't all that great. The UFC went all out to end the year and made November and December some big months. This Fox card is sort of a victim of that as well as the usual fact that Jan tends to be a thin month PLUS fighters tend to get hurt when it's cold and they tend to not wanna do a training camp around the holidays and etc etc etc. This show is a rather thin show but hey! I'll convince ya to care it because there are some fights worth keeping an eye on. Y'all ready?

Fights: 11

Debuts: 2 (Cory Sandhagen and Austin Arnett)

Fight Changes/Injury Cancellations: 1 ( Ilir Latifi vs OSP Cancelled)

Headliners (fighters who have either main evented or co-main evented shows in the UFC): 4 (Ronaldo Souza, Derek Brunson, Dennis Bermudez, Randa Markos)

Fighters On Losing Streaks in the UFC: 2 (Bobby Green*, Dennis Bermudez)

Fighters On Winning Streaks in the UFC: 4 (Gregor Gillespie, Derek Brunson, Joaquim Silva, Vinc Pichel)

Main Card Record Since Jan 1st 2016 (in the UFC): 18-10 Jacare Souza- 2-1 Derek Brunson- 4-2 Dennis Bermudez- 2-2 Andre Fili- 2-2 Gregor Gillespie- 3-0 Jordan Rinaldi- 1-1 Drew Dober- 3-1 Frank Camacho- 1-1

Too High Up- Drew Dober vs Frank Camacho

Okay so I feel bad about this because Dober/Camacho might be a fantastic fight. At 170 lbs, Camacho/Dober is one of those needed "THROW HANDS AND DO COOL SHIT!" type fights that you put on a card to guarantee an exciting fight where one dude is down to get finished. The problem is that both guys are sort of just there to be action fighters. Nothing is going to change for the winner or the loser, they'll always exist as mauler brawler types who have fun fights. This is a pretty good fight for action purposes but I just don't see main card on Fox. Sorry fellas.

Too Low- Kaitlyn Chookagian vs Mara Romero Borella

This to me would be a fine main card opener. No, it's not going to be a super action fight but Kaitlyn Chookagian vs Mara Romero Borella would be a solid fight with some divisional relevance. Give me this fight over two dudes swangin' on a main card filled already with dudes swangin'

Stat Monitor for 2018:

Debuting Fighters (Current number: 0-3): Austin Arnett, Cory Sandhagen

Short Notice Fighters (Current number: 1-1): 0

Second Fight (Current number: 1-3): Mara Romero Borella, Yi Jeon Kim

Cage Corrosion (2-4): George Sullivan

Twelve Precarious Ponderings

1- 185 lbs is sort of undergoing a bit of an under the radar renaissance of sorts. Robert Whittaker's emergence as a serious dude to know coincides with a heap of new talents being brought in at the weight class, namely guys like Eryk Anders, Oskar Piechota, Karl Roberson, Julian Marquez as well as the emergence of good fighters hitting their stride like Kelvin Gastelum, Anthony Smith, Gerald Meerschaert, Thiago Santos, Antonio Carlos Junior and Paulo Costa. Even with all of that being said, this is still a division that relies on about 6-10 guys to be headliners. Brunson and Jacare are two of those guys who will always be put into positions like this almost entirely due to what they bring to the table. They're known and in the UFC 185 lb class, they're almost always contenders to some various degree. The point I'm going for is that this could be the last chance for both of these guys because there's a heap of fighters under 30 who seem to be knocking on the door to the top of the division.

2- This is a weird sort of event where one of the guys is the hometown guy but you get the feeling that the other guy is the one they really want to build up. The UFC and Jacare reached an agreement on a new contract the day BEFORE he fought Robert Whittaker and so Jacare probably is earning more money now than he ever has before. He's a popular guy who has headlined in Brazil and could in theory be a continuous headliner in Brazil. He's reputable, fans like him and he's the sort of fighter who always seems to be one fight away from the title picture. It's easy to point out that he's lost to the guys in the interim title fight and got smoked by Whittaker but I wonder how much that matters at this point. It's in Brunson's backyard but I wonder if this is all about getting Jacare back into the title picture.

3- Brunson on paper is a pretty intriguing stylistic matchup for Jacare. It's grappler vs wrestler but Brunson hits hard enough to give Jacare reason to pause and avoid getting reckless. If it stays on the feet, I feel like Jacare is the guy with the more versatile offense compared to Brunson but the power is on Brunson's side. Jacare has been dropped and stunned in fights that extend beyond the first round recently and while he's still pretty quick for 185 lbs, I wonder if he's beginning to morph into one of those "Tough Dads" that makes middleweight such a wacky division.

4- Once upon a time not too long ago, Mirsad Bektic was expected to be in that mix at 145 lbs as a serious title contender. He had earned high praise as a prospect and did little in the UFC to disappoint from that regard even if you had concerns about how little he seemed to strike comfortably on the feet. Bektic's journey to the top was halted by Darren Elkins and if you're a prospect who loses at 135 to 155 lbs, you might as well fall off the face of the Earth. Since the loss to Elkins, Bektic has disappeared and might as well be redebuting at this point. There's so much to like about Mirsad Bektic that you're left to hope that he can recover from that loss even better. He got caught wrestling too much vs Elkins, gassed and then got finished when his wrestling abandoned him so it's not like it's a talent related issue I don't believe. Godofredo Pepey is the opponent and he's the right guy to test Bektic; active off of his back, more flash than substance on the feet, holes in the game that can be exploited and a real lack of wrestling savvy to not get taken down.

5- Speaking of "Once upon a time not too long ago", Dennis Bermudez once racked up a winning streak that featured Clay Guida, Max Holloway and Steven Siler. Since then? Well it hasn't quite been as pretty. Bermudez has always been hittable but he's always recovered well and been able to keep himself in the fight. Ricardo Lamas took advantage of Bermudez's slow starts and hittable nature, hurting him early and subbing him with a guillotine. Bermudez and Jeremy Stephens had a fucking amazing fight that ended with Bermudez being on the wrong end of the last knockdown, getting dropped and stopped by a Stephens flying knee on a sloppy takedown. Since then Bermudez has been more and more skittish as a fighter. He's still aggressive when he needs to be but he wrestles more, strikes less and seems almost cautious to the point of self conservation. He had the Zombie hurt and never stepped back on the gas en route to a stoppage loss and he never seemed to get out of the starting blocks vs Darren Elkins. Dennis Bermudez and Andre Fili are similar like minded talents who have struggled finding any sort of footing in the UFC.

6- Some might call Andre Fili inconsistent but let's be real; Fili has gone W-L-W-L-W-L-W-L-W in the UFC. Seems consistent to me, am I right?

7- Juliana Lima is not a fun fighter to watch compete by any stretch of the imagination BUT her vs Randa Markos is a really intriguing fight. This is a battle of two fighters who could exist on the back end of the 115 lb division and both have lost to the elite of the elites (Tecia Torres, Alexa Grasso, Carla Esparza and Joanna Champion to name a few).

8- Gregor Gillespie is a really intriguing 155 lber who is a bit too old to be a prospect (31) but not proven against top competition to feel like we know what he is in total. Unfortunately he's really not getting a fair step up with Jordan Rinaldi who is kind of a bottom layer of the division. Showcase fight for a big market.

9- Vinc Pichel vs Joaquim Silva is a REALLY good fight that is way too buried on this card. It's opening up the FS1 prelims but it's easily better than a collection of fights swimming around on the card above it. Pichel came back from a lengthy absence to flatten Damien Brown and his hands and wrestling skills make him a pretty intriguing 155er. Joaquim SIlva is a little basic for my tastes but he may be one of the best Brazilian "prospects" around. He's another guy we've seen tested before and he's passed those tests.

10- Bobby Green vs Erik Koch is such a battle between two guys who lose in spite of themselves consistently. I am ALL about this fight.

11- The featherweight division has won FOTN the past two shows to kick off 2018 so let's see if they can keep this going on with three straight shows. Bermudez vs Fili has an awesome shot to do it.

12- Any idea why fans have completely hopped off the Niko Price train? Seems totally weird given how good he was prior to his loss.

Must Wins

1- Derek Brunson

It's in his hometown against the highest ranked opponent he's ever faced. For MOST MMA fans, Brunson will always be the guy who loses to the best guys he faces. Machida could've been a guy you could rely on to turn that reputation around but alas alack. Brunson has improved a bunch since their first fight but has he improved enough to leapfrog Jacare?

2- Dennis Bermudez

Two fight skid, co-main event on Fox, opponent who stylistically matches up well with him. Bermudez needs this one.

3- Niko Price

Price finished Alan Jouban, Brandon Thatch and Alex Morono* to the point where it looked like the ATT product would crack the top 10 or so. Price took a step back vs Vicente Luque on short notice and then EVERYBODY forgot who he is. He's under 30 at 170 lbs with fight finishing instincts, length and pacing. The loss to Vicente Luque feels more like a roadblock and not an indictment of what he is.

Five Can't Miss Fights

1- Dennis Bermudez vs Andre Fili

2- Derek Brunson vs Jacare Souza

3- Gregor Gillespie vs Jordan Rinaldi

4- Bobby Green vs Erik Koch

5- Mirsad Bektic vs Godofredo Pepey

#MMA #UFC #Brunson #Jacare #Gregor #Rinaldi #Koch #Bermudez

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marril96 · 8 years ago

Text

Her Devotion

Characters: Rowena, reader

Pairing: Rowena/reader

Genre: Hurt/comfort

Warning: Whump

Summary: Following Gavin's death, Crowley kidnaps and tortures Rowena. Reader rescues her from his dungeon and helps her heal.

Editors: @apritelleorai and @oswinthestrange

A/N: I decided to start writing Rowena without her accent. I’ve only done that because it was hard for me to imagine her saying her dialogue at first, but now that I've written more of her and gotten more familiar with her character, I'm dropping the accented speech.

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Pain.

For the last twelve hours, it had been her entire world. Every little movement hurt. Every twitch and wince would send her body into a frenzy of pain. So she relaxed. She allowed the chains that bound her wrists to hold the weight of her body, resting her head against her arm.

There was no use fighting it. Not anymore. If her son had wished to release her, he would have done so hours ago. She was going to die here. He was going to torture her until she begged him to end her. Maybe it would take weeks, maybe decades. It all depended on when Fergus would grow bored of causing her pain.

Judging by the satisfied look on his face every time he'd strike her, he would never grow bored of it.

A part of her could understand. She had had a hand in sending his son – her own grandson – to his death. As fond as she'd been of the young boy, she couldn't pass on a perfect chance to get her revenge. The urge was too strong. And, to be fair, Gavin had made the choice himself. She'd initially been opposed to it, of course – she wasn't that heartless – but seeing as he'd already made up his mind about it, all she could do was support him.

It had been worth it. All of it. All this pain and suffering had been worth the look on Fergus' face, the tears in his eyes, the agony in his voice. Now he knew what it felt like to have the thing you love most taken from you.

It had been cruel, what he'd done to her. How he'd made her choose between her freedom and the death of them all, and Oskar.

It was only fair for her to make him feel her loss.

She hadn't even had time to properly mourn her adoptive son's death. Fergus, on the other hand, had all the time in the world to miss Gavin.

Rowena had already made peace with her death. She would never get the chance to completely turn her life around, as she had planned. She would never get to see you again and tell you how much she loved you – this time without fear that someone would take you from her. She would never get the perfect life she had always wanted, with you by her side.

But that was alright with her.

She had gotten her revenge. She had hurt her son the same way he had hurt her. An eye for an eye. A son for a son.

As for you… You would be safe. You wouldn't have to run from her son's demons for harboring her. You wouldn't have to hide from the literal devil because of her mistakes. You wouldn't have to sacrifice your comfort and safety, your entire life for the sake of an ancient witch who couldn't even tell you she loved you properly.

After she was gone, you would be free.

Rowena could handle torture. It hadn't been her first time in this very same dungeon, bound by these very same chains. Whatever her son could throw at her, she could take it.

Steps echoed throughout the bare halls. Light and cautious, but loud enough to be heard. Rowena almost chuckled. Had Fergus become bored already? Had he come for round two? The cuts on her face hadn't even stopped bleeding. He'd barely left the wretched cell. Surely he couldn't have wanted to pound on her some more so soon.

The door opened and Rowena raised her head weakly, wincing as the bruises on her neck protested her movement.

"Oh, my god!"

Her tired eyes met yours, wide and frightened. You clasped a hand over your mouth as you took in her appearance, pushing back the gasps that threatened to tear from your throat.

"Y/N?" Rowena asked, narrowing her eyes in surprise. Was this one of Fergus' tricks, or have you really come to rescue her?

"It's me," you confirmed, running to her. "I'd love to have a heart to heart, but we're kinda in a hurry, so we're gonna have to save that for later."

"How are you here?" she asked as you started fiddling with the chains, looking for a way to free her. It was going to be tricky without the key.

"Long story short – as I'm sure you already know, Crowley has a lot of haters here. Some of them owed me favors."

You could have asked for literally anything – it's not often that demons owe anyone, let alone witches, favors – and you asked for her freedom? If this had been anyone else, Rowena would have called them an imbecile. Hell, she considered you an imbecile. Hadn't you realized by now she wasn't worth the fuss?

There was always something with her. The Coven. Fergus. Lucifer. Amara. And now Fergus again. It wouldn't be long before yet another evil thing went after her and, once again, it would be you who would have to sacrifice yourself for her.

"You should've just let me be," she told you. "I'm not worth it."

"No way in hell – no pun intended – and yes, you are. Don't make me give you a cheesy sitcom speech," you chided.

Rowena chuckled, which prompted another wince. God, how pathetic she was, all cut up and bruised. She wasn't sure she would be brave enough to look herself in the mirror. What must you have thought, looking at her pathetic form? You'd seen her injured before, but never to this extend. She had no doubt that you would care for her the best you could, but a part of her still hated that you had to see her like this. She was the older one in this relationship. She'd had centuries of experience and wisdom, not to mention power not many witches could measure up to. She was supposed to be the one to protect you, not the other way around.

You caught her as the chains slipped off her wrists, helping her get steady on her feet.

"Can you walk?" you asked.

"Aye," Rowena replied. Despite being in pain, she still had some strength in her legs. Her wounded stomach would protest her movements, no doubt, but she could take it until you got her out of this hellhole. Or at least she hoped she could. "I think so."

You gently cupped her cheeks, mindful of the injuries covering them, and tilted her head up to look her in the eyes. "Stay strong for just a bit longer, okay? A few more minutes and this is all over."

Easier said than done, Rowena thought. Not many could handle an entire night of torture. For the last twelve hours, it was nothing but pain for her. Punches. Strikes. Slaps. It was a wonder she was still able to talk, considering the amount of times her son's fist connected with her mouth. She knew you meant nothing but the best for her, but she wasn't sure she could be that strong, confident witch you knew her as.

You seeing her this broken was a huge blow to her pride as it was. If she was to stumble while you were getting her out of this place, she didn't know how – and if – she could ever recover from that. It wouldn't just be a failure to you – she'd fail herself just as much. She would never be able to live with herself if her weakness put you in danger, after everything you'd done for her.

As if you'd read her mind, you added: "If, at any point, it becomes too much, let me know. I'll carry you."

As if that would make her feel any better. Didn't you see that she was only dragging you down? "What about Fergus?" she asked, fear flashing in her eyes. If he was to catch you attempting to break her out, he would make you pay. He told Rowena, during one of his many rants in-between the torture session, that his punishment to you would be her death. He had no intention of going after you – losing her would have been enough for him. This, however, would change things. Rowena wouldn't be surprised if he killed you in front of her to torture her further.

"He's out with the Winchesters," you replied. "Don't worry. If he comes back, I won't let him hurt you."

"It's not me I'm worried about," she said. She could take whatever torture her son could inflict on her. It was you she was afraid for. She was the one who dragged you into the mess that was her life. It wouldn't be fair for you to pay for her mistakes.

"Rowena, I've got three hex bags and an angel blade. I'll be fine. And so will you." You made sure to emphasize every word. She wasn't getting hurt on your watch. "He will never hurt you again. I promise."

Rowena gave a small nod. If she wasn't in so much pain, she would have laughed. Sometimes she forgot how protective you could be. Then you would do something like this and remind her of your devotion. What had she done to deserve someone like you in her life? Someone who loved her so much that she would risk her safety, her life, for her. Someone who didn't think her weak despite her wounded appearance. Someone who would protect her at all costs. Despite all her misfortunes, Rowena truly was the luckiest woman in the world.

She threw an arm around your shoulders, leaning against your body for support. "Hold on tight," you instructed.

The first few steps were difficult, but once Rowena regained her composure, thanks to leaning most of her body weight on you, she managed to keep up. Every movement hurt, every step followed by a pained hiss or a gasp. Rowena wouldn't say it out loud, but your words of encouragement helped. Her wounds hurt, but hearing you say how what good of a job she was doing and praising her for her strength made her feel a lot better. She could do this. She could escape this horrible place and find refuge in your tiny, warm, warded apartment. Safety was only a few meters and a car ride away.

You'd barely made it halfway to the door when she doubled over, clutching her stomach, her hopes of freedom crushed in a split second. Damn Fergus! Did he have to hit her that hard?

"This is hopeless," she said, struggling to even her breath. Her attempt to straighten up elicited a moan as her injuries protested the movement. "Just leave me."

"Not gonna happen," you said defiantly. "Either we both leave or neither of us does. I am not leaving you."

"You're a fool."

"I am," you said with a nod.

How could you be so nonchalant about this? This was your life you were talking about! Couldn't you see what you'd gotten yourself into, bursting into a place of danger for a person who wasn't worth it?

"Instead of moving on with your life, you broke into Hell for a lost cause! And now you're going to die because you're too stubborn to realize that the perfect life you're dreaming about is never going to happen!" she snapped, barely keeping her voice below a shout, all the hurt and anger that had been building up inside her over the last twelve hours spilling out. "Fool!"

Instead of being offended, you looked bored. "Are you done?" you asked, shooting her an incredulous look. If she thought she could get you to leave by spouting nonsense, she was gravely mistaken. You haven't been dating her for so long – and loving her for even longer – to fall for an obvious attempt to push you away. You may not have been the sharpest tool in the shed, but you weren't that stupid. "You should know by now that doesn't work on me. I'm not leaving you. Period. You can hate me for it all you want, but I'm here and I'm taking you home whether you want it or not!"

"Stubborn girl!" Rowena said. As baffling as she found it, your protectiveness flattered her. No one had ever loved her that much. No one had ever put her first, above even themselves. No one had ever risked their life for her.

She realized, with a sinking feeling in her gut, that she was being ungrateful. You'd come all this way, used up all the favors demons owed you, and put yourself in danger for the sole reason of freeing her. And after you get her home, there was no doubt you would do your best to make her comfortable and provide her with care no one had ever provided her with before. Last time she'd been in this dungeon, her son had left her chained up and alone for weeks. He'd given her no medicine, no healing salve, nothing to ease her pain. You, on the other hand, would tend to her every need until she got better.

"Sue me!" you shot back.

Rowena sighed, and then took a deep breath. This was going to be difficult. "Y/N, I…" How do you apologize when you had never done that before? Apologies weren't in her nature. Guilt wasn't in her nature. How was she supposed to put what she felt in words?

"I'm sorry, too," you said softly, understanding what she'd meant without her having to say it out loud. "We can finish this at home. You think you can keep going?"

Rowena nodded. "Let's go." This would hurt like a bitch, but it was going to be worth it. Mere minutes parted her from the backseat of your car, where she could finally rest. And afterwards, mere minutes parted her from a warm bath and a safe bed. She could make it. She had to. It wasn't just her life that was at stake here – it was yours, too.

For you, she thought, reminding herself of what was most important. She couldn't let all your hard work go to waste over a little bit of pain. She was stronger than that. She could beat it just as she'd beaten it all those other times before. If she could rot in this place for weeks three years ago, chained and bruised and miserable, then she could walk a few meters to the car.

With all the hisses and swallowed yelps, the two of you made it to the car. It took a lot of out of Rowena, both physically and mentally. She instantly threw herself on the backseat, screaming as she landed on her injuries. "Take it easy," you said worriedly. As much as it hurt, though, she appreciated the ability to let it out freely, without fear that some demon would hear and try to lock her back up – or even worse, snitch on her to her son.

You'd given her the hex bags while you were driving, opting to only keep the angel blade. Rowena held them to her chest, clutching to them as if her life depended on it. If Fergus was to find her, that could very well become reality. Rowena was aware of how desperate she looked, huddled up with hex bags on the backseat of a car, but all sell-consciousness was thrown to the wind now that she was finally free. Her pride would heal along with her injuries. The most important thing was that neither Fergus nor his demons could hurt her anymore.

Parking in front of your building, you took a quick sweep to make sure no demons had followed you. After being convinced that the coast was clear, you helped Rowena out and, letting her lean against you for support once again, led her inside. You were both grateful your building had an elevator. Going up the stairs with a person who could barely stand would have been a nightmare for you both.

Rowena collapsed on the first thing she laid her eyes on, which happened to be your couch. A pained moan escaped her mouth as bursts of pain shot through her like electrical sparks, sudden and aching. Maybe it wasn't the best idea to just throw herself down like that. Considering everything she'd been through, though, no one could blame her from craving comfort. She brought her hands to her sides, the bruises covering her abdomen instantly reacting to her touch.

This was going to be a problem. If it hurt this much now, she didn't even want to think about how much it was going to hurt later. How was she going to sleep if every movement hurt as much as the beatings themselves, if not even more?

The answer to her question came in the form of a pill.

After locking the door and checking on the Devil's Trap underneath the mat, you went to grab the first aid kit you saved for emergencies (though not quite as dire as this one) and took a pack of your pain relief pills. You set the kit on the coffee table and sat down next to her.

"It's a painkiller," you explained when Rowena gave you a look, silently inquiring about the medicine you were offering her. "It won't numb everything down, but most of the pain will be gone for a few hours."

Rowena nodded, taking the pill from you. You handed her a glass of water and she gulped the pill down, her face scrunching at the bitterness. You chuckled.

"That face you just made was so cute," you explained when she frowned.

She smiled. You could be so silly. Overprotective and too prone to worrying at times, and at the same time so random. "Thank you," she said, taking another sip of her water.

You nodded in response. "Give it a few minutes to kick in."

You took her hand into your own, squeezing it for comfort. Rowena gave a squeeze back. She couldn't put in words how appreciative she was of you, of your care. Not many people would go to such lengths for her. Most would leave her to rot in that dungeon and laugh at her misery. After all, she was a wicked witch. Who gives a damn if someone like her gets tortured and murdered?

You do, she told herself. You'd always cared about her wellbeing. Even when she was chasing after Lucifer, you cared. You loved her in silence, but your concern had been very vocal. Rowena had dismissed it back then. She would never make the same mistake again.

You pulled her sleeves up for an inch to inspect her wrists. Rowena sighed in relief at finding no open wounds there. The chains that bound them had been firm. Her milky skin bore traces of deep red and purple. These bruises would take days, maybe even weeks, to heal.

You drew closer to inspect her face, tucking stray locks of hair behind her ear. Rowena winced when your finger grazed a cut covering her right cheek.

"I'm sorry," you said.

"It's fine," Rowena replied. It was just a jolt of pain. Nothing to be concerned about. There were bruises on her abdomen that hurt more than you accidentally touching her cut. She'd be lying, though, if she said your concern bothered her. It felt good to be cared for for once in her life. She hadn't experienced this kind of kindness since the time Oskar's family took her in.

Oskar… Rowena's heart clenched with grief. She wouldn't betray you like that. Not ever at the cost of her own life or freedom. She'd barely gotten over the loss of her stepson. She wasn't going to make the same mistake with you. She was going to love you to the very end. No matter what happens, she was going to put you first. Gone were her selfish days. If you could risk your life to rescue her, she could very well return the favor.

You have no idea how much I love you, she thought, looking you in the eye. A small smile played on her lips. She would remember everything you'd done for her. Every bit of kindness you'd shown her, every kind word you'd said to her. She would remember it all. Maybe this was her way to happiness. Not doing horrible things and telling herself it's fine. Maybe you were the thing she'd been missing all along, her way to happiness, her hope for a better future.

Maybe with you she could have it all.

"What?" you asked, noticing her strange expression.

Rowena shook her head, smile widening. "Nothing."

You gave her a smile of your own. "You're gonna need stitches," you told her, looking from the cut to her cheek to the one below her eye.

Rowena shook her head once again. "Just put some gauze on them." She'd been in enough pain as it was. There was no way she was letting a needle anywhere near her skin. Besides, she'd healed up just fine without stitches last time.

"Are you sure?"

"Aye."

"You don't trust me with a needle, do you?" you teased.

And there was, well, that. "I would be lying if I said I did."

You both chuckled. It felt good to let a bit of normalcy creep in. It seemed as if it was ages ago that the two of you laughed without a care in the world. In reality, it hadn't even been a full day.

Fergus' torture had taken a lot out of Rowena. She was going to need some time to readjust to normalcy. Being chained up and mercilessly beaten tends to do that to a person.

You cleaned her wounds with utmost care. Rowena stayed silent throughout the procedure, save for a hiss when you accidentally poked the split flesh while positioning the gauze. She understood your concern, but she couldn't comprehend why you felt the need to apologize. You didn't have to do any of this. Taking care of her had been a courtesy on your part. So what if you accidentally hurt her? It was nothing in comparison to what her own son had done to her. He had, after all, been the reason for this whole mess.

Soon enough both cuts had been cleaned and dressed, the pieces of gauze covering them secured with tape. Rowena realized, with a relieved smile, that most of her pain had disappeared by the time that you finished with her cuts. Sudden movements still hurt and her bruises were as sensible to touch as ever, but simply sitting there and breathing brought no pain.

"How are you feeling?" you asked, looking her over to make sure all wounds had been death with.

"Good," Rowena replied. "Your pill is working."

"Happy to hear that." You took her hand and laid a kiss to her knuckles, then another to its top. Then you cupped her cheeks and looked her in the eyes, your lips widening into a big, bright smile. "You're going to be okay."

Rowena could tell from the tone of your voice that you were telling it to yourself more than to her. You needed her to be okay. Just as she depended on your care, you depended on her wellbeing. You didn't like seeing her in pain any more than she liked being that way in front of you. You loved her too much to not let her injuries bother you. Her weakness may have wounded her pride, but when it came to you, it brought nothing but fear. Fear that you would lose her. Fear that you would be unable to help her.

"Of course I am," Rowena said. "I have you to thank for it."

"Thank me by getting some rest."

She most definitely could use some. She wasn't sure whether it was everything that had happened or the pill you'd given her, but she had gotten quite sleepy. "I could use a nap," she said. "Would you mind fetching me a blanket?"

"Wouldn't you be more comfortable in bed?"

"I'm good here," she assured you. Because you're here, she thought to herself. She'd be all alone in the bedroom. Here she had you to watch over her.

"Okay. Whatever you want."

She kicked off her shoes and got comfortable while you went to search for a blanket. It wasn't easy to find a good position to sleep when almost every movement hurt, but Rowena managed it. She laid on her side, facing the opposite wall. Her eyes settled on the edges of the Devil's Trap sticking from underneath the mat. The apartment had been warded against angels and demons per her request months ago, back when she'd returned to life and feared Lucifer's retaliation. You insisted on the Devil's trap. "Just in case," you'd said. Demons were sneaky creatures. Who knew what they could come up with in order to get inside and take her?

Now this very same Devil's Trap gave Rowena comfort. It wasn't even the Trap itself – it was the fact that you wanted it there, and that you checked up on it to make sure it still stood strong. You always had her best interests in mind. She was a fool not to realize it sooner.

To think that she went for Lucifer when you'd been there all along, loving her in silence, sacrificing your chance at happiness for her… Rowena had made plenty of mistakes, and that her been one of her biggest ones.

She was startled from her thoughts by you placing the blanket over her, making sure to cover her entire body. She reached for your hand when you moved to step away, grabbing your wrist. She wasn't entirely sure why she did that. All she knew was that she needed you to stay. She couldn't be alone, not after everything she'd gone through tonight. No warding or Devil's Traps could make her feel as safe as she felt when she was with you.

It was strange to depend on someone after centuries on depending on nobody but herself. One part of her was frightened. Another one was happy that she'd found someone who loved her just the way she was, without forcing her to change.

She was changing, but it wasn't for you. It was because of you. Being with you made her a better person, make her appreciate all she had and taught her that love isn't weakness – it's strength.

"I'll be right here," you told her as if you'd read her mind. You leaned down to lay a kiss to her temple, then tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "Don't worry. I'll keep you safe."

That was enough for Rowena. She released your wrist, looking you in the eye. "Thank you."

You smiled at her. "Get some sleep, sweetheart. You're tired."

Rowena looked you over, frowning at the dark circles surrounding your eyes. When was the last time you'd slept? "Aren't you?"

"I'll be fine. Coffee will take care of it."

You gave her hand a quick squeeze to assure her of your words, but Rowena wasn't convinced. You were sacrificing yourself yet again. She was going to have to come up with a way to repay you.

"Sleep well."

Rowena doubted she would, but she appreciated the kind wishes. Giving you one final smile, she closed her eyes. Within minutes she found herself in dreamland. Much to her surprise, there were no nightmares, no pain and torture and wicked smirks on her son's mouth.

Instead, there was nothing. Blissful, peaceful darkness she appreciated more than anything.

Next chapter: Her Gratitude

#rowena #rowena x reader #rowena macleod #spn fanfic #supernatural fanfic #spn fanfiction #supernatural fanfiction #rowena macleod x reader #hurt/comfort #whump

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elizabethrobertajones · 7 years ago

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So I thought I had a nice easy DVD to just watch to kill a bit of the train journey before I ran out of laptop battery (fun fact: my laptop appears to have the battery life of watching an entire DVDs worth of episodes. Neat.) and I could have a break from all the nonsense I've been dealing with since Berens stomped through the entire show flipping tables.

uh anyway 3x05 ends the MotW part with pretty much the "i need you to see me" moment to reveal a kid was poisoned by a parent, has been trapped in a child-like stasis ever since, and required their suriving parent who had been innocently blind to this and accidentally feeding the ongoing trauma (caught up in those stories!) and not even realising there was something that needed to be heard, while the grown adult trapped in this stasis is represented as a child in the state they were when the parent last interacted with what they think of as them...

I'm back with an internet connection but I cba to go look at all the meta from previous rewatches people have done to see if people thought the step mother was a John parallel already, but if you look at it like she was getting a huge emotional benefit from harming the girl and probably was messed up enough to not consider how she felt (I mean, to the point of poisoning her into a coma so obviously) then John's messed up expectations on Dean by this point in season 3, in an episode Sam and Dean use as a battle ground mirror to their situation they can SEE is one about Sam letting Dean go or not in the same way, we know also that the only reason Dean is dying is because of John's messed up expectations on him - even in season 2 they knew John was asking too much and shouldn't have said his last words to Dean. Only he did, and so that's the final nail in the coffin, literally. Anyway, tops off a lifetime of John putting an emotional burden on Dean - some of his OTHER last words to Dean were how he would look after John instead of vice versa which I think was supposed to be a positive recognition finally of how much work Dean had done propping up the family and not a "wow that's fucked up sorry" :P Idk, bitter Dean!girl goggles against John - always have and always will be. So I can see a parallel by season 3 where the narrative is swinging around in clear recognition of this - Dream a Little Dream of Me is going to make this textual soon enough.

And in that respect the doctor, the father of the coma girl, was always a sort of benign Mary mirror, so it makes it even funnier to me that his role became literally a proto mirror to this scene WITH Mary and the vindication of the little girl getting her message across and being finally understood, and gaining closure and getting to move on as a result, just kind of blows me away because it's retroactively made the episode an incredible mirror out of what it already was, because previously there was no need for that scene to be a mirror until season 12 because Mary and Dean didn't have that relationship because it was so painfully one-sided that the doctor's role mirroring Mary's was a pretty pointless thing to talk about, since all the time she was off the map, it didn't even make sense to say she would need to understand Dean herself, because that requires us to be confident she has even half a chance of getting a POV in the story.

I can't tell if Berens did this deliberately or if the fact this episode has the exact same resolution as 12x22 is just coincidence, because that's some pretty obscure canon recollection for a MotW that doesn't seem to have a lot of notoriety that even, for example, the next one does for Kripke hating it so much and I thiiink was this on the list of episodes Chuck apologises for in 4x18?

Perhaps it goes right to the top and was a Dabb suggestion for how it had to go down, because watching these two episodes back to back you go from 12x22 to a feeling like in some other world I would be writing meta about 3x06 vs 12x13, 9x21 and 6x04 because of the concept of having a dead ship captain, summoning the ghost, and using it for the resolution of family drama by having them confront each other again (this is the episode where Sam invokes Cas as part of that spell which is always worth a giggle). I felt like 6x04 pulled on this episode loosely just for having a vengeful ghost out to get family drama resolved - specifically going after family members that killed each other, and watching season 10 recently plus comments in season 12 between Rowena and Crowley, they're dead set on killing each other, as part of the Worst Family parallel as they often are when their dynamic comes up. Unfortunately I just can't get my head around 12x13 enough to work out how this all fits together but I have to believe there was a serious intention to resolve some stuff thematically which never made its way onto the screen.

But this arc was always tied into the Cain & Abel stuff by bringing in "Seth" or Oskar, Rowena's favoured other son. (There was a lot of meta between 10x22 and 10x23 about "Seth" because of biblical connotations I think tying it directly into that family but I genuinely can't remember because I don't do Bible lore, like... at all. Anyway he was a spare 3rd forgotten brother from somewhere or other directly relevant, if not Cain and Abel's we-forgot-Adam comparison) and Oskar vs Gavin was something that... didn't really happen except for the comment that that was what it had all been about from Rowena. As the grand finale to the MacLeod family drama that Dabb started based on the model of 3x06, which specifically mentions that one brother killed the other in a very "Cain and Abel" way, I am kinda annoyed more than ever we didn't get a ghost ship 2 episode to show how things were all upside down and different in that dabb era way but... Ugh, I don't know. Some episodes you would suggest minor upgrades if you had the powers, others you'd just take back to the drawing board :P

But while we're on the subject of Cain and Abel, 3x06's last conversation also has a conversation that the "same circumstances you'd do the same" argument in 9x13 directly mirrors as in does backwards and to a completely different conclusion... Which I find fascinating especially as the episode namedrops Cain and Abel in the first place. And 3x04 (Carver's first episode) uses the phrase "brother's keeper", also from the Cain story, about Sam and Dean. I mean season 9 & 10 churned up a lot of season 3 and we went over most of this at the time... I have just somehow found a continuous ramble in something that makes enough sense to alarm me that I managed to segue between each subject of what was one line notes I made on the train. So, cool.

#3x04 #3x05 #3x06 #I watched 3x07 as well but I was getting frazzled from being on a train #and didn't make any notes #also it's mostly about stuff that's season 3 & 4 relevant #the crossroads demon and gordon both spout season 4 Sam Problem Thoughts #the crossroads demon in particular literally sounds and looks a lil like Ruby #which also amuses me because that's the one who was an actess Jared dated right?#pfft #spn rewatches #weird rewatching #season 3 #12x13 #6x04 #dabb vs cars #buckleming appropriate wank for ts #did not expect a 'justice for the ghost ship episode!!!' stance this morning but here we are

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imagine-it-like-this · 8 years ago

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Title: Bleeding Characters: Rowena, Sam, Dean, Mary, reader Relationships: Rowena/reader Genres: Drama, Hurt/Comfort Warnings: Whump

You were still a newbie when it came to witchcraft, so when the Winchesters asked for Rowena's help, which ended up requiring her to cast an extremely difficult spell, Rowena suggested you stand aside and watch.

Sam and Dean weren't too thrilled when you told them you'd become friends with Rowena and asked her to teach you magic. They were even less thrilled a few months ago when they found out the two of you had started dating, but as of recently they somewhat trusted Rowena, so they've eventually come to accept your decisions.

While you knew the two of them from a case you'd helped them work, Mary, their mother, was a complete mystery to you. She was nice, but there was something off about her. You couldn't put your finger on it; all you knew was that you couldn't trust her, and you made sure to warn Rowena to be careful around her.

Unlike her sons, Mary was old school. While she tolerated witches, unlike plenty of other monsters, her dislike for Rowena was instant. She was somewhat civil towards her, however, it appeared she couldn't forgive the witch for daring to be the King of Hell's mother. As if she had a choice in the matter.

"Watch everythin' I do," Rowena instructed. She was kneeling on floor over the pentagram she'd drawn with her own blood. A circle of thick, white candles surrounded her, forming a small fence around her petite form. "Listen to my pronunciation. It's important."

"Alright," you beamed. You couldn't believe you were going to witness her casting another grand spell. Nothing could compare to the feeling that came along with watching her do magic in all her glory. "You're gonna be okay, though? It looks a bit dangerous."

While you were all up for learning from the best, you would never risk her life for a spell. She was worth more than a pesky magic show.

Rowena smiled. "I'll be fine, dear."

She gave your hand a quick squeeze for reassurance, and then started chanting. Almost on instant, the candles lit up in unison, their flames casting shadows over the dimly lit room.

You could barely contain your excitement as you watched her in her natural element – basking in magic she loved so much. You took in every single detail, absorbed every word she so perfectly pronounced. If you didn't know any better, you would assume she were a native speaker.

All the joy faded from your face the moment a drop of blood slid down her nose. You may have been a newcomer to the craft, but if there was one thing you knew for certain, it was that bleeding was never a good thing. One of the very first things Rowena told you when she started teaching you was that if you start bleeding, it's time to call it quits. Unless it was an absolute emergency, no spell was worth your health.

"Rowena?" you called, voice thick with concern.

"I'm fine," she mumbled, resuming the interrupted chanting.

Her weak tone told you she was everything but fine.

"Keep going," Mary said at the same time you told her: "Maybe you should stop."

You shot the hunter a glare before averting your eyes back to your girlfriend. "It's okay if you need to rest."

"We don't have time for that!" Mary said, voice thick with irritation. "If she doesn't cast this spell, a lot of people could die!"

"If she does cast it, she could die!" you snapped, having had enough of her attitude. "I know you don't give a fuck about a witch's life, but I do. I love her and I'd rather die before I let something happen to her. Again. You people already forced her into a difficult spell, or did you already forget about that?"

You gave Sam a quick look, prompting him to lower his head in shame. You've made it your mission to never let him, Crowley, and Castiel forget about forcing Rowena to kill Oskar.

While Crowley, being a demon, was pretty much rid of human emotion, the younger Winchesters and the angel were perfectly capable of guilt.

"I'm not gonna let you do it again! She's not your slave. She's a person and she deserves to live just like all of you. What, are you gonna chain her up again and make her kill someone else she loves?"

"No one's killing anyone," Dean cut in. "Let's all just calm down."

"It's a bit hard to calm down when your mother keeps trying to kill my girlfriend!"

"Hey!"

"I'm not trying to kill her," Mary interjected. "I just want her to finish the spell. A lot of people – innocent people – depend on it!"

"I'm sorry," you weren't really, "but I'm not risking her getting hurt for a bunch of strangers!"

"Maybe we should take a little break," Sam suggested. "All of us."

"Besides, it's not that urgent," Dean added. When Mary tried to protest, he said: "The monster's dead. All the people he put in a coma are safe in their hospital beds. It sucks for them, but hey, at least they aren't dead like those other folks. An hour or two more of sleep won't kill 'em."

Just as you were about to thank him, Rowena's body went limp, collapsing to the concrete floor with a thud.

"Rowena!"

You were quick to mutter a spell to extinguish the flames and another one to throw the candles away before kneeling down next to her.

"Rowena?" you said, pushing a strand of hair away from her face and gently tapping her cheek. She was warm to the touch, almost as if she had a fever. Another trail of blood fell down her face, staining her sapphire shirt. "Sweetheart?"

She stirred, and you let out a breath of relief. She was alright. Extremely weak, but she would live.

"Y/N?"

"I'm here." You gave her cheek a comforting caress.

Breathing heavily, she used her hands to push herself up into a sitting position. You put an arm around her, letting her lean onto you for support.

"Take it easy, honey," you whispered, stroking her hair. "You okay?"

"Aye," she breathed. "It was just a moment of weakness. This spell is complicated."

"You don't have to do it," you told her.

"I want to," she said determinedly. "I just need a moment."

"Of course! Take as much time as you need."

Sam handed her a tissue. You snatched it before she could take it and started wiping the blood off her face.

"I'm not a child, Y/N," she chided, sending you an annoyed glare.

She hated it when you babied her, but you couldn't help it that seeing her weak made you want to care for her. It was part of your nature, an instinct you neither could nor wished to control.

Caring for her was nice for the both of you; it gave you an opportunity to give back everything she'd given you, and it allowed her to, at least for a bit, let go of her tough façade and have a much needed cry. Holding everything in wasn't healthy.

"Trust me, I know," you said, throwing away to tissue after cleaning off every last drop. You cupped her cheeks, bringing her closer so you could press your forehead to hers. "I'm just worried."

She took your hands, entwining her fingers with yours. "I'm fine," she assured you. "As I said, it was just a moment of weakness. This spell takes a lot out of ye."

"I can see that," you told her. "If you still insist on casting it, let me do it with you. I know I still pretty much suck at magic, but I'm a fast learner. I'll do everything you're doing. Just, please, let me help you. You can't do this on your own."

She contemplated it for a bit before finally giving in. "Alright. It should work better if there's two of us."

"Great!"

"But," she added, raising her forefinger up in warning, "if I see any blood, ye're off the spell. Overexertion can be fatal for a young witch."

"Deal."

You were ready to agree with everything, just so you could help her.

"Do you need anything?" Sam asked, startling you.

You were so caught up in the intimacy that you forgot the three Winchesters were also there. While her sons looked relieved that Rowena was alright, Mary's face, on the other hand, bore the look of impatience. She had no time for your witchy relationship drama, as you'd guessed she probably called it. She was a Winchester, after all – quips and snarking were practically in their DNA.

"A cup of tea would be nice," Rowena said.

You rose to your feet, letting her hold onto your arm as she got on hers. You threw an arm around her waist just in case, and she gratefully leaned into you for support. There were times when she opposed even looking at you with anything other than scorn in front of other people. Now she didn't care if anyone saw. She was a woman – she had needs and desires, and if anyone minded, her magic was more than willing to silence their complaints.

"Are you sure you can even do this spell?" Mary inquired as you headed for the kitchen.

Rowena smirked. "D'ye know who ye're talkin' to, dear?" She motioned to herself. "Most powerful witch alive. Though I'm not one to brag."

Of course not.

"You didn't look that a moment ago," the hunter commented.

Rowena's narrowed, angry eyes told you she could handle this one. "If ye doubt my capabilities so much, ye're free to call any other witch. I'm sure they'd all jump at the chance to help the Winchesters."

The thick sarcasm in her voice prompted you to grin.

For the remainder of your and Rowena's stay, Mary didn't dare utter a word of complaint. In fact, she had even thanked the two of you for casting the spell and waking all those people up.

Editor: @oswinthestrange

#rowena #rowena imagine #rowena x reader #spn #supernatural #spn imagine #supernatural imagine #rowena macleod #rowena macleod imagine #rowena macleod x reader

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haleyfury · 4 years ago

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June was another transitional month into my new normal, with plenty of books in tow. I’ve been keeping busy, between starting my remote jobs and grad school. It’s crazy to think I finished my first round of grad school classes, and my second round started this week. I started experiencing some Zoom burnout this month, so reading and taking my eyes away from my laptop screen with books helped things. I actually have to read two YA books for my grad school classes in July, and I’m so excited to be getting to read YA for school – I read two YA books for undergrad, but that was purely because I decided to do my capstone projects on them.

My reading and TV watching were all over the place this month. I read a lot of contemporary and reread a few books, while I still dove into a reality TV this month. I often had trouble really concentrating on TV, movies especially – I had one night where I tried watching three different movies and then ended up rewatching Cheaper by the Dozen 2 and an episode of Queer Eye.

What is also improving my reading mood even more is that my local library re-opened for door side pick up! I may or may not have put 15 books on hold as soon as the online catalog re-opened. Although there are plenty of good things going on personally right now, there’s definitely still some uncertainty this summer, to say the least. While my state’s covid-19 cases have significantly decreased over the past two months, we’re seeing multiple states have huge increases in cases. Between work and school, I’m typically home Monday through Friday but these increases has made me rethink a few weekend plans and curious to see how my state moves forward with re-opening plans. I went to my first outdoor restaurant and first trip back to Barnes & Noble last week, but my family and friends and I are still being cautious and smart about where we go.

Beach Read by Emily Henry | 5/5 Stars

Like me, I’m sure you’ve seen Emily Henry’s Beach Read EVERYWHERE, but I’m here to confirm that the hype is more than worth the read! There’s such depth to this contemporary romance.

Love at First Fight by Sandhya Menon (novella) | 5/5

I’m a firm believer that Sandhya Menon is the queen of novellas, with Love at First Fight as no exception. You don’t have to read it before picking up 10 Things I Hate About Pinky this July, but it was a really fun addition to the Dimpleverse!

Attachments by Rainbow Rowell 5/5 (reread)

One of my best friends IRL is reading Fangirl, aka honestly my all-time favorite book, which led me to make the decision to reread Rainbow Rowell’s contemporary books this summer. Attachments still reigns as my favorite adult fiction novel of hers.

Slay by Brittany Morris | 4/5

If you’re looking to read more YA books by black authors, as well as books that reflect some of the conversations we’re currently having about race in the U.S., Slay is definitely worth checking out.

Landline by Rainbow Rowell | 5/5 (reread)

I forgot how much I loved Landline, including its many one-liners and sarcasm. I also loved the cameo from one of my all-time favorite fictional couples.

10 Things I Hate About Pinky by Sandhya Menon (ARC) | 4.5/5

Over the past four years, my summer reading has not been complete without a new YA contemporary from Sandhya Menon. 10 Things I Hate About Pinky was such a summery take on the enemies-to-lovers trope.

The Play (Briar U #3) by Elle Kennedy | 4/5

Elle Kennedy’s Off-Campus and Briar U series reign among my favorite new adult romance novels. It wasn’t my absolute favorite, but The Play was still a fun and flirty installment.

The Boy on the Wooden Box by Leon Leyson | 5/5

The Boy on the Wooden Box is one of those books I can’t believe I didn’t read until 2020, but I’m so, so glad I read this Holocaust memoir from child survivor, Leon Leyson, who worked for Oskar Schindler during the war.

Thirteen Doorways, Wolves Behind Them All by Laura Ruby | 4/5

Thirteen Doorways, Wolves Behind Them All’s critical praise really caught my attention. If you’re looking for an often untold story from the World War II period, I recommend checking this YA book about a girl living in a Chicago orphanage out – did I mention it’s also narrated by a ghost?

You Deserve Each Other by Sarah Hogle | 5/5

I am not joking when I say that You Deserve Each Other might be the funniest and most clever contemporary romance I’ve ever read.

My Life Next Door by Huntley Fitzpatrick | 4/5 (reread)

As you might be able to tell, I was on a small rereading kick in June, My Life Next Door included. I didn’t LOVE this one as much as I had the first time around – a lot more unresolved issues than I remembered – but it is such an atmospheric summer contemporary.

Jenna Takes The Fall by A.R. Taylor (ARC) | 3/5

Jenna Takes The Fall wasn’t necessarily my favorite read, but it made for a really entertaining read while floating around my pool.

The Sullivan Sisters by Kathryn Ormsbee | 2.5/5

I really wanted to love The Sullivan Sisters because I tend to seek out books about sisters, but it was just a miss for me.

The Politician S2 (Netflix) – The Politician was my favorite show of 2019, so I could not wait for its second season to air. I’ve realized that this show is slightly ridiculous… but that doesn’t make it any less good!! Once again, I was so impressed by the acting, and this season had a few more politically relevant themes than last season.

Athlete A (Netflix) – If there’s one thing that you must watch on Netflix, it’s Athlete A. This documentary walks viewers through the several sexual abuse cases involving Larry Nassar and USA Gymnastics. To say the least, it is such an infuriating and emotional watch, as we hear from several gymnasts about USA Gymnastic’s abusive environment. I found tears rolling down my face throughout, especially because of Maggie Nichol’s story. This is such an important watch that demands more from USA Gymnastics and overall how female atheletes are treated in sports.

The Bachelor GOAT (ABC) – I’ve been loving putting on these wrap-up episodes while I work as background noise, and even more, I love listening to Here to Make Friends‘ recap episodes on my walks.

Below Deck Mediterranean (Bravo) & Outdaughtered (TLC) – Reality TV is still one of my favorite forms of escapism. My Below Deck obsession is still alive & well, while I’m bummed that Outdaughtered was only 5 episodes long -although I completely understand why in order to protect the Busbys and the camera & crew.

Lenox Hill (Neftlix) – Let it be known that I am one of the most sqeamish people when it comes to medical things and, let’s face it, the sight of blood. I learned quickly that being a nurse or doctor was not for me while taking anatomy in high school. However, I found myself obsessed with Lenox Hill, a docuseries following Lenox Hill Hospital in NYC. It was such a fascinating watch, following the neurosurgery, OB-GYN, and emergency medicine departments of the hospital.

Some other random things I watched include Shtisel S2 (Netflix), The West Wing S1 (Netflix/NBC), and Clueless (Netflix).

Reviews

NEW ADULT FUN: The Play (Briar U #3) Review

SUMMER MUST-READ: Beach Read by Emily Henry

WAS IT WORTH THE HYPE? : Where the Crawdads Sing Review

MUST READ NOVELLA: Love at First Fight Review

NEW ADULT REVIEW: Until the Last Star Fades

June 2020 Mini Reviews: Books I Should’ve Read A While Ago

FINISHING THE THOUSANDTH FLOOR: The Dazzling Heights & The Towering Sky Review

Bookish & Other Fun:

Summer Reading Recommendations: The YA Edition

Mid-Year Book Freak Out Tag: 2020 Edition

If We Were Having Coffee: June 2020 Edition

TBR & JUNE READING PLANS: The Stuck At Home Book Tag

Summer Reading Recs: Based on What I Read in 2019 Edition

Gravity is Heartless Q&A with Author Sarah Lahey

What did you read and watch in June? Anything that I mentioned? Share in the comments!

BOOKS, TV, & MY CURRENT NORMAL: June 2020 Wrap Up June was another transitional month into my new normal, with plenty of books in tow. I’ve been keeping busy, between starting my remote jobs and grad school.

#June 2020 #June 2020 Wrap Up #Wrap Up

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