#they both suck mariokart so true | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dilf-manifester · 4 years ago

Note

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60 for the ask thing ;));););)))

wow :smirk: thank u for the ask

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans? wine glasses 😌✨they make me feel fancy yk how it is

2. chocolate bars or lollipops? lollipops ✨dunno why im like this but here i am ig

3. bubblegum or cotton candy? bubblegum bcs?? have yall tried the hello kitty grape bubblegum??? that shit slaps

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you? as was with every gay person “a pleasure to have in class��

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups? cans bcs then i can crush it with my hands and flex on everyone else

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear? goth and formal bcs uhh yeah

7. earbuds or headphones? earbuds 🤧i dont like the fact that people can hear ur music with headphones

8. movies or tv shows? uHHH i’d have to say tv shows 😩i can pay more attention to shorter episodes yk

9. favorite smell in the summer? the mix of humid summer air and those mosquito candles

10. game you were best at in p.e.? bro im gay did u actually think i would be good at pe

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day? i don’t 🥰thanks for asking!

12. name of your favorite playlist? either songs for when the drip or fuck i got blood on my nice white shirt

13. lanyard or key ring? keyrings r better dont @ me

14. favorite non-chocolate candy? black licorice cats 😳😳they’re so good like holy shit

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment? the bell jar 😔👉👈its one of my favorite books to this day

16. most comfortable position to sit in? on the floor or with my legs hanging over the arm of the chair

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes? leopard print slip ons 🙈🙈they’re so comfortable i stg

18. ideal weather? snowy so i can just sit inside with the fireplace going and do some writing

19. sleeping position? uHHHH idk what to call it but i think the closest thing is fetal position 😭

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)? honestly whatever scrap of paper is closest 😭im not picky

21. obsession from childhood? dinosaurs. that’s it that’s the post.

22. role model? i have a few but markiplier (cringe ik) and john green r my main ones🤧🤧🤧i just look up to them a lot yk

23. strange habits? i always have to knock on a door 5 times before entering and okay that might seem excessive but as it turns out idc

24. favorite crystal? malachite or tiger’s eye 😳

25. first song you remember hearing? brown sugar by the rolling stones 😭my mom used to have sticky fingers on vinyl so she used to play it constantly

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather? swim even tho i am AWFUL at it

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather? play in the snow or just sit inside with the fire going bcs im literally 5 years old mentally

28. five songs to describe you? she’s out of her mind by blink 182, goddamn by never loved, do what you want by ok go, impressive depressive by bad luck, and true romance by she wants revenge

29. best way to bond with you? just talk to me straight up or send me music recs pls

30. places that you find sacred? cemeteries and abandoned schools. they have a rlly specific vibe to them ngl

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names? uhhh so its rlly just my docs, black jeans, a mesh type undershirt and whatever top shirt i pull out of my drawer

32. top five favorite vines? is that a police??? im calling the weed❗❗, stAHp i could’ve dropped my croissant, that one where the alien’s walking on the treadmill, summer solstice summer summer solstice, and zach stop

33. most used phrase in your phone? ‘omfg what the fuck’ bcs for some reason thats my automatic response to anything

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head? whatever the fuck the ad for the 2001 buick lesabre was

35. average time you fall asleep? like uHHH 12:15 am 🤧

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing? doge 😭😭idk why i remember it so vividly but my sister showed me the orignal doge meme and i thought it was the funniest shit

37. suitcase or duffel bag? suitcase 🤧they make me feel cool

38. lemonade or tea? both 🙈i’m an arnold palmer kinda mf

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie? lemon meringue pie 🤧banger dessert methinks

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? a fence caught on fire in front of the science rooms bcs someone was smoking weed on the roof and threw their blunt on the dead bushes and everything went downhill from there

41. last person you texted? my grandma asking her if she could pick up some tomatoes from vons 🧍‍♂️

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets? JACKET POCKETS SUPREMACY❗❗❗

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket? ngl i wear all of those but i gotta go with the hoodie 🤧🤧

44. favorite scent for soap? lavender or vanilla rose😌✨

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero? sci-fi bcs uhh yea fuck it thats why

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in? just an oversized shirt that’s it that’s the post

47. favorite type of cheese? swiss or havarti and you can fight me on that

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be? pineapple 😌😌😌

49. what saying or quote do you live by? ‘fuck’ -markiplier 2021

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=553CfZAADag i swear the first time i saw that i laughed so hard i thought i was gonna die

51. current stresses? everything; next question

52. favorite font? comic sans bcs im 8 years old

53. what is the current state of your hands? smoov and v well taken care of

54. what did you learn from your first job? capitalism is the root of all evil and that traditional working is outdated also raise the minimum wage

55. favorite fairy tale? vasilii the beggar 🤧🤧idk if anyone else knows it but its always been one of my favorites

56. favorite tradition? every year during rosh hashanah we go over to my uncle and tia’s house and i absolutely kick ass at mariokart bcs all my cousins suck at itn also lighting the hannukiah (hanukkah menorah)

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome? low self esteem, anxiety over literally everything, and an inferiority complex (now replaced with a fucking god complex bcs there’s no inbetween for me)

58. four talents you’re proud of having? i can play like a bunch of instruments, im rlly good at writing, i’m good at building things and doing things with my hands, and i can identify what song’s playing rlly fast if i know it🤧

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? motherfucker or son of a bitch 😊😊😊

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be? slice of life like bro just please give me a break

#finally after several hours #i've done it #i finished this post

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sinbinsidney · 8 years ago

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NurseyWeek Prompt #3 - Challenge.

“Oh, it is fucking on, bros,” Lardo shouts over the incessant thumping of the bass. “You two are going to get obliterated.” She points an emphatic finger at Ransom and Holster, who stand shoulder to shoulder on the other side of the beer pong table. Holster cups his hand over his chin, rubbing it thoughtfully, and side-eyes Ransom.

“She shouldn’t be able to say words like ‘obliterated’ three cups of tub juice in,” he says. Ransom is just beginning to nod in agreement when he’s beaned smack in the middle of his forehead with a ping pong ball. Holster gets hit in the same spot half a second later, sending both of them reeling back, spluttering.

“You know, I figured four years was enough time for the two of you to learn not to underestimate my abilities,” Lardo says, tossing another ping pong ball up in the air. She cocks an eyebrow and catches the ball, meeting their gazes. “My mistake. Clearly, you need another lesson.”

She turns and scans the crowd briefly, letting Holster and Ransom set up beer pong on the table behind her.

“Nurse!” She calls, beckoning. “Get your ass over here, we’re playing beer pong.” Nursey grins as he sees their opponents.

“Oh, hells yes,” he says. The kegster hasn’t been going on for too long, so he’s not too schwasted. Lardo looks him over solemnly and places a hand on his shoulder.

“Young padawan, you have learned well. It is time for you to come into your own,” she says seriously. Nursey bows his head, fighting to keep the smile off his face.

“I won’t let you down, master. I promise.” Lardo nods and pats him twice on the bicep. She and Shitty had invested hours into teaching Nursey how to properly play last year, explaining the different techniques and strategies they’d tried throughout the years. Now, her little baby bird was ready to get kicked the fuck out of the nest and play for real.

“Yo, we gonna play, or what?” Holster calls, smiling when he sees Nursey next to Lardo. “You ready to get your ass kicked, Nurse?” he chirps.

“Try me,” Nursey says back, flipping his snapback backwards on his head. Ransom laughs and does the same, white cloth standing out brightly among the flashing lights and moving figures behind him.

“Rock, paper, scissiors?” he asks, holding out a fist to Lardo. She nods, and the battle commences.

Ten minutes later, Ransom and Holster have a solitary soldier standing at the edge of their side of the table. Holster is kneeling on the floor, face level with the table surface, pleading with the cup to “stay strong, little buddy, we’re gonna make a comeback.” Ransom is chugging the last of the beer in Nursey’s last victim, hand on Holster’s shoulder.

Nursey shares a look with Lardo and can’t help but laugh at his captain’s antics. Lardo shakes her head and claps her hands together, gathering the attention of the crowd and their opponents even over the noise of the kegster. She picks up the ping pong ball with the gravity of an executioner.

The ball arcs perfectly over the table, shining brightly in the lights. Derek thinks someone is playing the Chariots of Fire theme song in the background, which, objectively, is hilarious but, really, all he can think is that it just feels right.

The ball lands smack in the middle of the cup, not even brushing the rim. The crowd goes nuts around them, seeing as the hockey captains have only managed to sink one cup, which Nursey happily drank. Lardo raises her arms up in an imitation of Christ the Redeemer, grinning as Holster and Ransom wail in the background. She turns to celebrate with Nursey, pouncing on him in a hug and clinging to his back.

“That’s my baby bird! Way to fly!” She cheers in his ear. “Fucking destroyed them!” Nursey laughs and yells back.

“All you, babe! All you!”

God, she loves her team.

Nursey is staring blankly up at the sun-filled windows of Faber after practice when he hears someone slow to a stop next to him. He turns to see who it is and finds Whiskey leaning on his stick. His face is in sharp profile as he follows Nursey’s gaze towards the light.

“Top shelf, from the top of the circle,” he says quietly, still not looking at Nursey.

“What?” Whiskey turns to meet his quizzical gaze.

“We’re gonna play P.U.C.K.” he says. “Or B.E.A.U.T.Y., whatever works.” Nursey tilts his head.

“I don’t think I’ve played P.U.C.K. since I was in mites,” he replies. Whiskey shrugs.

“Loser does puck clean-up after next practice,” he offers.

“You’re on,” Nursey says, narrowing his eyes.

He and Whiskey skate back to the bench, toss off their helmets, and knock a few pucks over to center ice, companionably quiet in a way that the two of them had eased into over the course of the year. As cliché as the whole rookie-mentor thing seems to be, it really does hold true on the Samwell Men’s Hockey Team. Just like Chowder became Bitty’s to take care of (not that he doesn’t take care of everybody, because, you know, it’s Bitty), like Dex matched up with Ransom and Nursey with Holster, the newest tadpoles found their way to an upperclassman to watch their backs and help them out.

Whiskey, for some reason, had gravitated to Nursey right off the bat. He’d sat down next to him during team lunch one day and took one of Nursey’s chicken fingers, leaving behind one of his biscuits n’ gravy things for him instead. Nursey had blinked down at his plate, looked at Whiskey, and shrugged, continuing to eat. It had evolved from there until they were comfortable bitching to each other – Nursey about his various run-ins with assholes on campus, Whiskey about the idiocy of the lacrosse team. They’ve gotten pretty good about picking up on each other’s moods, at this point. Whiskey, apparently, figures that Nursey needs a distraction, a bit of fun to drive away the buzzing of anxiety about testsreadingspaperspoemsfriendsfamilywork that’s hovering over Nursey’s head.

He’s right.

Nursey sucks in a breath before he releases a wicked slapper from the faceoff circle, slamming it home in a snap of twine.

“Nice,” Whiskey comments, lining up his own shot as Nursey skates backwards to get out of his way. His shot rings home, too, though with a little less power.

The shots get increasingly elaborate – “coast to coast, between the legs three times, wrister”, or “using your off hand, from the dot”, or “spin-o-rama backhander.” Nursey basks in the sounds of hockey in the quiet arena, leaning back and listening to his skates carve into the ice, the thud of his stick as he lets it drop, the echoing snap of a shot as it hits the boards.

“Damn,” Whiskey whistles as Nursey lets a beauty of a shot fly from the blue line, eyes closed. Nursey grins at him.

“You’re up,” he says. Whiskey takes a deep breath and lines up the shot before squeezing his eyes shut, nose wrinkling up slightly.

The puck flies just left of the post, slamming into the far boards and ricocheting back out into open ice. Whiskey groans the second he hears the puck hit, leaning back on his skates and pressing his stick flat against his thighs, tipping his head back to look forlornly at the ceiling. Nursey grips him by the shoulder and gives a little shake.

“P.U.C.K. Better luck next time, broski,” he says, laughing. Whiskey shoves him off good-naturedly and goes to collect the pucks they used. Nursey follows after and taps his legs with his stick. “Hey, Whiskey,” he starts, hesitating as Whiskey looks at him over his shoulder.

“Thanks, man. I needed this, today.”

Whiskey gives him a rare smile, the standoffish exterior he keeps up completely melted away.

“Anytime, Nurse.”

“Motherfucker, how dare you!? Fuck. You.”

“My god, Nurse, is this what it takes to push you over the edge?”

“Fuck you!”

“Wow, holy shit, Dex, what did you do?”

“I blue-shelled him.”

“Like a little bitch,” Nursey spits out vehemently. He can hear Ransom and Holster laughing as they wander away from the living room and into the kitchen, but he’s so focused on getting back into first place that he doesn’t dare look away from the screen.

“You know, if I had known that MarioKart was the thing to make you break, we would’ve played this a long time ago,” Dex says conversationally. Nursey can feel the muscles in his shoulder bunching when he twists the Wii remote sideways to avoid a stray banana. He leans into Dex for a second, shoving him just slightly out of the way and hitting a mushroom boost to bypass Princess Peach.

“Hasta la vista, Peachy.” He can see Dex out of the corner of his eye, mouthing “Peachy” to himself incredulously. He jumps as Nursey abruptly lets out an “Aha!” the second he sees Yoshi up in front of him.

“Nurse, let’s be reasonable about this,” he warns, making Yoshi perform evasive maneuvers up on the screen as Nursey fires off two green shells in his direction, keeping the third circling around him as protection.

“Bud, we passed reasonable five minutes ago. Nobody blue shells Toad and lives.” Dex cracks up, eyes crinkling as he leans forward, elbows on his knees. Nursey hits the jump and flips the Wii remote up, nearly smacking himself in the face, but he manages a trick before he lands, so he gets the boost bonus. It rockets him forward until he’s just behind Dex. Quietly, he starts humming the Jaws theme song, steadily increasing in volume as Dex concentrates next to him, biting at his lip.

“Nurse, fuck off! Get away!” He yells, laughing as he catches on to what Nursey is doing. “Oh, shit,” he continues as they both see the finish line appear in the distance.

“It’s on, fucker!” Nursey shouts, leaning forward so he’s pressed shoulder to shoulder with Dex again, like that’ll make his character move any faster. Slowly, bit by bit, Toad comes neck and neck with Yoshi, the smaller character moving just the slightest bit faster.

“Come on, come on,” Dex chants under his breath. Nursey’s face splits into a grin as the whirling sound effect of the finish line happens twice, practically overlapping – appearing on his half of the screen just a millisecond before it appears on Dex’s.

“Toaaaaaaad, mothafucka! Take that!” He crows, tossing his controller up in the air and throwing himself to his feet, beginning to dance around the room. He’s almost immediately tackled as Dex launches himself at his midsection, wrapping both arms around Nursey’s chest as he wrestles him down.

Nursey begins laughing almost as hard as Dex is swearing at him, trying to block as many swats as he can, even as Dex flips them over so he’s sitting on Nursey.

“Aw, come on, Dex! No one likes a sore loser!” He chirps, grinning up at his defensive partner.

“Yeah, well, no one likes you,” Dex says. Nursey pouts exaggeratedly.

“Now, we all know that’s not true,” he says. “You looooove me.”

“God help me.”

“Admit it!”

“I hate you. You’re terrible.”

“Dex!” Nursey gives a toss of his hips, impatient.

Dex isn’t expecting it, though, letting out a little gasping noise at the sudden movement. He ends up kneeling over Nursey, straddling his legs, hands on either side of Nursey’s head as Nursey’s own automatically go to Dex’s narrow waist in an attempt to steady him. Dex’s eyes are wide with shock as he gets much closer to Nursey’s face than is strictly buddies, a red blush rushing up his cheeks.

“S-sorry,” he stammers out, blinking rapidly. Nursey is just as surprised as he is, but he hides it better, keeping an easygoing expression on his face.

“No problem. It’s my b, Poindexter.” He grins. “Though, if you wanted to get all up on this, you could’ve just asked.”

Dex goes firetruck red, mouth dropping open as he stammers through the start of a few sentences, all the while sitting back on Nursey and letting him prop himself up on his elbows. Dex looks down at his own chest and takes a breath.

“Is that – is that a challenge, Nursey?” Nursey smiles at this ridiculous idiot and reaches up to wrap a hand around his neck, pulling him down as he leans back against the floor again.

Their first kiss is a little rushed, a little nervous. Nursey keeps his hand on Dex’s neck, weaving his fingers into the short hair he can reach, letting the other curl over Dex’s lower ribs, feeling the warmth of him through his t-shirt. He controls the kiss as Dex flails a little, keeping it chaste until he feels Dex begin to settle into it.

Dex gets one hand onto the floor, balancing himself, and flattens the other just over Nursey’s heart, feeling the nervous, thumping beat of it as he leans into the kiss, leaving a little kitten lick on Nursey’s lower lip, asking permission. Nursey’s mouth drops open on a little gasp, heart going thump-thu-thump in his chest.

It feels like hours, but the kiss lasts maybe thirty seconds. Dex lifts his head slowly, eyes still closed, feeling Nursey press a palm to his cheek. When he opens his eyes, he sees Nursey smiling up at him, green eyes sparkling in the afternoon light.

“Yeah, Dex. It’s a challenge.”

#i needed more nursey + team content in my life #so here we go!#nurseyweek #writing #derek nurse #will poindexter #lardo duan #whiskey #dexnursey #nurseydex #nurseydex ficlet #omgcp fanfic #omgcheckplease

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purify-orre-blog · 6 years ago

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Addendum: Michael’s Video Logs - CH. 1 Section

TL:DR; Hey so. Michael was planning to kill Rocky, and I didn’t know how else to get it out there. Read all the logs or just this one, but know this was written so I could put that out there. These four are in the Epsilon Folder, titled “Epsilon1.mp4” through “Epsilon4.mp4”. These will also be under the “VideoLog” tag. Check Navigation or Here for the chronological order!

TW/CW : Electrocution and (Unintentional) Self-Injury, Plans of Murder-Suicide (Via Bombing), A Panic Attack

Accompanying Music: Theme of Suspense (You Know What You Must Do, Even If You Don’t Want To)

From off-screen, you can hear the closing of a door. Then Michael comes into view.

“Project Epsilon: Log 1, Start.”

His face holds the same serene smile as before.

“I’ve finally run into a few of my… classmates. They don’t seem like anything more than unlucky victims.” He brings his left hand up and starts twirling some of his hair, closing his eyes to think for a moment.

“It’s going to be difficult becoming the villain. After all, Oswald showed up today. I can tell someone will crack soon.” Slowly he looks up to the camera and lets the smile drop.

“I don’t want to do this.”

He walks over to the couch by his coffee table, which we see is littered with Wii Gamecases, and sits down on the center cushion leaning back.

“Rocky and Caelum and Saturday and Ann seem nice. I don’t want to be the bad guy, again.”

He covers his face with his hands and rises his voice to that of a normal indoor-voice.

“I read the chat so far. They’re either clueless or really good actors. And I can’t read auras more than the basics…”

He sighs loudly and pulls his hands away slowly, staring at them.

“Everyone has auras. No one is a Shadow. I’ve apparently been purified? I don’t remember becoming a Shadow, but the info is there. And my Move Count is significantly higher. I don’t remember taking any PP MAXes before I left…”

His hands start smoking, and little sparks start to shoot out. They float in the air and fizzle out before hitting the ceiling. Michael seems unfazed.

“I can’t find my Worn Collar Neutralizer. I need it to regain HP and PP at the end of each turn. It negates Minus and stat bonuses on me, but I need it so I’m safe to be around.”

The smoke and sparks travel all the way down to his elbows and white hot electricity courses around his arms. Michael seems unfazed.

“And I can’t find it.”

As he says this, a buzz resounds throughout the room and the lights flicker on and off, before settling off. The sparks disperse from Michael’s arms and his white headband stains red.

“I’ll have to reset the breakers again. Unlike last time, I think people are awake.”

Red liquid starts to drip onto his forehead. It’s blood. Michael seems unfazed.

“I’ll have to apologize for this and set up a probable accident scene. For whatever reason, Baton Pass doesn’t work on Caelum. I’ll have to be careful.”

He stands up and walks almost robotically to the center of the frame, swaying a bit back-and-forth, blood trickling down his face.

“Move Count so far: Encore, 7 of 8. Baton Pass, 62 of 64. Spark 28 of 32. Fake Tears, 32 of 32. Project Epsilon: Log 1, End.”

And he walks out of view, but we don’t hear the door close.

☼☼☼ The door slams shut and Michael storms in, pouting. His arms are crossed and he is pointedly not looking at the camera.

“Project Epsilon: Log 2, Start.”

He slouches into himself and stays still for about 30 seconds, then springs up, moving to put his hands on his hips.

“A CURSE? Really?” He’s talking a little louder than usual, and so, at normal indoor voice volume. He lifts his right foot and stomps it hard on the ground, wincing a little as he rolls his ankle out. “Yeah, right! I’ve been cursed before by Dusclops.” He rights his stance. “And this is no CURSE!”

He lifts his head and quickly plasters a smirk over his scowl, moving to make finger guns at the camera.

“My HP is at 119 out of 122 and going up as I remember to eat, and I know that rabbit robot is no ghost-type, so there!”

He spins on the heels of his feet to the right, and breaks off into a run around the coffee table, heading off towards the kitchen.

“Jokes on him, ‘cuz I have food stashed up for weeks!”

The opening and closing of a pantry can be heard.

Michael rushes back with a party-sized bag of Chex Mix in his hands.

“Even if he did CURSE me, it’d be ineffective, ‘cuz I have healing items, so there, Oswald! I got you good!”

He smirks and points to himself in triumph.

“Seems I’m just too smart for you!”

The smirk breaks into a giddy grin and he spins himself around again, this time to the left. With a bounce in his steps, he runs off towards the kitchen again.

No sound is heard.

“…”

From the view of the living room, all that can be seen is the fridge of the kitchen and a nearby counter. Michael sets the bag down and calmly walks back.

“I can’t open the pantry anymore.”

He’s smiling calmly.

“It’s not actively locked. I just can’t open it. One second.”

He moves to the coffee table in the middle of the living room, and picks up the game case to Mariokart Wii. He picks it up and walks about 5 feet away from the camera.

“Let’s see if my hunch is correct.”

He opens the case with ease.

“Okay, so far so good.”

He pops the disc out of the case.

“And if I’m right, once I do this,” he pops it back in, “It’ll be stuck,” he tries to pop the disc out again, and is unsuccessful.

“…”

He looks to the camera, calm smile thinning. His voice is back to it’s normal quiet octave.

“Perhaps I was cursed after all. Which means I probably can’t leave on my own.”

He walks back to the coffee table and sets the case back down. He pauses for a moment, and closes the case.

“Not like I’ll be able to play it anyways…”

Then he opens the other cases on the table and carefully takes all the discs out, setting them around.

“Better keep them out so I can use them…”

He looks to the camera sheepishly, raising his voice a little louder than what’s considered normal.

“Uh, in my defense, this is going to be my only entertainment in-between coding updates to the Aura Reader Storm process?”

And he sucks in a sharp breath of air and slaps a hand over his mouth, as if worried. He looks to the laptop connected to his Aura Reader at the other end of the coffee table. He blankly stares at it for about 20 seconds.

Then he shakily moves the hand away from his mouth and grins big back towards the camera. The smile seems real, but his eyes are glazed over.

“Ha ha, I almost said the detonation phrase… That would’ve been real bad, huh?”

He lets out a shaky and ugly laugh.

It’s more wheezing than anything else. He pulls his headband over his eyes and his hair falls to cover his face. He settles into the couch and grabs the nearest throw pillow, hugging it tight. Michael’s huddled in on himself, knees up to his chest. The laugh turns grating and loud, and Michael winces in between breaths.

When the laugh finally stops, he looks towards the camera, eyes still covered by headband and hair. He releases hold of the pillow and sits up straight. If the camera weren’t at a high angle, Michael might seem to tower over the room.

“I’m saving it for our first group meeting.”

He stands up, still effectively blind-folded, maneuvering fluidly from between the coffee table to a foot away from the camera.

He’s looking at it, dead-center.

“I planned to detonate it at Rocky’s concert, freeing everyone.”

He taps his left index finger on his chin and tilts his head to his right. The calm smile turns wry.

“But that didn’t pan out. And 30 feet isn’t enough to end us all in one go.”

He tilts his head to his left and pushes the headband up with both hands. Then they drop to his sides. His eyes are still closed, but it feels like he’s aware of exactly where he is.

“I intend to make the first kill.”

His eyes snap open.

“Never-mind the fact I can’t actively leave…”

The smile calms again. Michael’s eyes seem to crackle with something.

“I’ve set pipe bombs down intermittently around in the backroom of every gift shop currently available, except the one I took my new laptop from. I have remote access codes set up for just this occasion.”

And the smile drops. Michael tears up.

“I hope we get saved before my two week set-goal is up.”

He looks away from the camera and sniffles.

“I don’t want to have to hurt anyone else.”

He looks back to the camera, in what can only be described as utter desperation. He’s not slouching anymore.

“I know it’s selfish, but more than anything I hope someone will offer to let me out when I finish coding the upgrade in a week.”

The irises of his green-blue eyes seem to swirl and shift, twisting and turning. His eyes fill up with tears.

“I kind of hope it’s Rocky who lets me out. Killing someone so nice would be exactly what’s expected for my character arc. Expected from a murderer like me.”

He shudders a little bit, but keeps speaking.

“I’ll be the villain everyone always said I was. And once they execute me? True hope will spring forth.”

He starts to shake. His hands grasp at the sides of his face and he starts to cry. His face is stuck in an unsettling blissful smile. He’s bouncing slightly on the balls of his feet.

“A simple tool taking down a super star…”

He’s practically purring.

“Can you imagine anything more hopeful?“

The tears keep coming, falling over that big elated smile, and he moves to wipe his eyes. He’s still looking at the camera, and his focus seems crystal clear.

“Sorry for that. It’s been a while since I’ve indulged in feelings of hope and grandeur.”

He waits for the tears to stop, and composes himself. He slouches back down and takes a few deep breaths.

“Project Epsilon: Log 2, End.”

He opens the bag of Chex Mix on the coffee table, and goes back to coding.

☼☼☼

Michael looks calculating as he types into his phone. Everyone and then, hints of fear and worry can be seen on his face. He turns to the camera, smiling that calm smile.

He chirps, voice loud and excited.

“Project Epsilon: Log 3, Start!”

He leans back into the far end of the couch and stretches his legs before getting up and walking 4 feet away from the camera.

“Rocky and Caelum are going to let me out! I’m lucky that this plan is going along so smoothly! There’s just one week left before I lead Rocky to the back of one of the gift shops and set off you-know-what on both of us!”

There’s a knock at the door. Michael’s calm smile flashes quickly between surprise and actual joy, before swinging back around to a polite smile.

“That must be them now! Project Epsilon: Log 3, End!”

He turns and jogs out-of-view towards the front door.

“Hey, it’s unlocked, you two! I just can’t open it!”

☼☼☼

The lights are off.

The sound of a door quietly opening and shutting can be heard.

The lights flicker on.

“Project Epsilon: Log 4, Start.”

Michael walks slowly into frame. He looks like he’s about to be sick.

“Someone else beat me to it.“

He looks down to the floor, brows furrowing in confusion.

“Someone else killed Rocky before I could. I don’t know who did it.”

He looks back up into the camera.

“Was this punishment for trying to play villain? Should I be a martyr instead?“

He brings his hands together and nods once to the camera view, calm smile returning.

“A villain’s sacrifice does often inspire heroes to continue on…”

And he closes his eyes, and smiles wider.

“I’ll have to use some MOVEs at the upcoming trial!”

He pulls his hands apart and pumps his arms in excitement.

“If I’m really careful, I can lead them to thinking I did it, and set off the Aura Reader before Oswald’s punishment happens!”

And he clasps his hands together and smiles sheepishly towards the camera.

“I know it’s selfish, but really, it’s better for us all to die together! That way no more killings will occur. And Rocky won’t be lonely!”

His smile seems real.

“And at least one Oswald will be gone! That’s something, right?”

He tilts his head to the left and sighs.

“Yeah, I mean. It’s pretty obvious there are tons of Oswald bots… Grandpa Chobin and Kaminko always had spares of every project…”

And, in a flash, Michael spins himself around on his heels and snaps finger guns to the camera. He winks with his left eye.

“WISH me luck at the trial, anyone who’s watching, okay?”

He brings his hands back together and closes both his eyes in a sigh.

“If I’m caught off guard even once, I’m liable to spill the beans. Especially if it’s Caelum that says anything. I can’t keep this act up for very long…”

And he snaps up from his slouch into a full-height salute and grins at the camera.

“Jovi, if you’re watching, I’m sorry for letting you down. Your big brother’s just fulfilling his last use, okay? And, I don’t know why I’m here, but I’ll always love you. Project Epsilon: Log 4, End.”

He marches out-of-view to the kitchen and opens the fridge door, pulling out a Capri Sun.

#ch1 #videolog

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