#they be nerdy and we love 'em

[dead-meat]

They're each others homo-erotic friendship (cannon event)

[5sospenguinqueen]

Growing Pains | Oscar Piastri x Reader

Summary: When fans begin commenting about your future plans, Oscar begins to worry that your long-term relationship is preventing you from truly experiencing life. 

Warnings: Swearing. Angst. Self-sacrificing Oscar haha. Childhood sweethearts

Female reader with various faceclaims. Pics found on Pinterest.

2023 season

Less baby-fever, more baby panic haha. I'm so sorry if these aren't as baby-centered as the others. I've been trying to make them a little different.

Main Masterlist

next.

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YourUserName just posted

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, danielricciardo and others

YourUserName i love weekends off with you <3

978 comments

oscarpiastri you didn’t post the one of me with my face in the water? that is the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for me

→ YourUserName only because your ass was in the air and i’m the only one allowed to see that 

→ oscarpiastri oh

→ landonorris @ oscarpiastri well, now you’ve told the internet that it exists, we need to see it

→ User1 lando is one of us 

danielricciardo i’m still your favourite australian though, right? 

→ YourUserName no. i’m my own favourite australian

→ oscarpiastri you tell ‘em, sweetheart 

→ User2 SWEETHEART!!!

User3 i know they’re only young but when can we expect a wedding

→ User4 they’ve been together for long enough. they’re practically already married at this point

→ User5 their wedding would be so cute. can you imagine all the f1 appearances we would get? 

→ User6 mark webber in a tux 🤤

mclaren our favourite young couple

→ landonorris hey! 

→ mclaren you and daniel don’t count anymore

→ danielricciardo hey! 

User7 papaya wedding when? 

oscarpiastri just posted

liked by mclaren, charles_leclerc and others

oscarpiastri my favourite girl 💕

2,664 comments

YourUserName don’t let suzie hear you say that. she’ll be distraught

→ oscarpaistri maybe you should drive her more and she’ll love me less

→ YourUserName whoa, i thought this was an appreciation post for me, why are you throwing shade

→ landonorris why would she drive her own car when she has you to do it for her?

→ YourUserName exactly! 

→ User9 wait, suzie is a car? i was hoping they had a pet or something we didn’t know about 

User10 the disrespect to have lando’s # on her back but be stood in front of oscar’s garage 

logansargeant yet i suggest she support driver #2 and i had holes poked in all my juice boxes 

→ oscarpiastri you can never prove that was me

→ YourUserName i have video footage

landonorris everyone can relax, she’s wearing the shirt because she lost a bet. oscar was a good sport about it 

→ YourUserName i got soooo many dirty looks that day. the fans did not like me

→ oscarpiastri i still think you’re beautiful. not as beautiful with MY number splashed only our back but

→ YourUserName you know 81 is my favourite number

→ YourUserName (and sometimes 16)

→ charles_leclerc forza ferrari

User11 the fact that they fell in love during the most awkward years of a person’s life and have continued to love each other when they got hot

→ User12 they saw the potential in each other 

User13 the fact that he’s loved you since you were 14 and continues to love you more each day 🥹

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YourUserName just posted

liked by racerbia, alex_albon and others 

YourUserName i’m so proud of you, osc. another podium in a long-line of many. thank you for sharing your joy and success with me. 🧡🧡

when i befriended the nerdy 12 year old who wouldn’t stop talking about engines, i never imagined that you would be dragging me around the world. don’t get me wrong, i always believed you would make it this far. i just thought i would’ve managed to break free from you before then 😂 however, i’m so glad i didn’t because you are my favouritest guy in the whole world, and seeing you on that podium made me cry more than watching the supernatural series finale 

1,220 comments

YourUserName oh, and well done to lando on P3, i guess

→ landonorris you guess???

User1 time for another round of: is he looking at lando or y/n in the 3rd pic?

→ landonorris it was y/n this time :( 

→ YourUserName you get loads of pics of him looking at you like this, let me have my moment

oscarpiastri thank you for coming with me around the world and supporting me no matter what. you’ve been one of my biggest supporters these past 8 years and i don’t think i could’ve done it without you by my side. i love you so much, even if i come second to dean winchester 🧡🤍

→ User2 P2 in your relationship as well

→ oscarpiastri only because y/n is p1

→ YourUserName stop making me love you more and more each day. i might explodeeeee

User3 my parents. i need them to adopt me because they’re just so cute 

User4 drenched in champagne is a good look for piastri 

thisisnotyn the pirelli cap needs to stay on during sex 

→ User5 is this y/n’s secret account 

landonorris this is so cute. excuse me whilst i puke

maxverstappen1 a delight to share the podium with your boyfriend for the 2nd time

→ User6 y/n’s boyfriend and y/n’s boyfriend’s boyfriend on the podium with max 2x in a row 

→ YourUserName omg max verstappen commented on my post! you’re like my favourite driver ever

→ oscarpiastri you agreed not to mention this in public

→ charles_leclerc @ YourUserName i thought it was me

→ landonorris i thought it was me

→ fernandoalo_official jokes on all of you, she told me it was me

→ aussiegrit you're all wrong. it's me

User7 if you guys are after a third, i’m free?

→ User8 how could you say this to the cutest couple on the grid

→ User9!because y/n has said worse and is more unhinged than we think but oscar’s pr manager has gotten to her recently 

User10 i’m gonna have to agree with @ OscarPastryyy just because they’ve been together forever doesn’t change the fact that they’re still young

User11 yeah they’ve been together for a while but that doesn’t mean that having children is their only option. they’re still technically children themselves 

NicolePiastri he doesn’t know how to do his own washing. trust me, he’s not ready for children. Y/N on the other hand, has been keeping that boy alive since they were 12

→ User12 nobody humbles an f1 racer more than mama piastri 

User13 @ CHICKEN!! is so real for that. max is only 4 years old than them and yet everyone talks about him, kelly and P being a family and when are him and kelly getting married, but y/n and oscar have been together for longer than kelly has been a mother so… 

User14 i think people only focus on their age and forget about their experience. i went to school with them and they still act just as infatuated with each other now as they did when they were 14.

→ User15 but they’ve also only been with each other. perhaps they should try dating other people before committing to the rest of their lives 

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YourUserName just posted

liked by aussiegrit, logansargeant and others

YourUserName quando a Roma 🇮🇹❤️ tagged: YourBFF, YourBFF2

1,009 comments

YourBFF i told you that pic of you by the fountain would look amazing

→ YourBFF2 i think if we pumped another cocktail in her, she’d have gone swimming in it

→ YourUserName stop making me sound like a sloppy drunk

→ YourBFF you were sloppy anyway 

→ YourUserName bitch

→ YourBFF2 it’s part of being in your 20s. welcome! 

→ YourUserName not funny. 

User1 guys, oscar hasn’t commented. he always comments on posts with her in, even if they’re posted by friends/family 

mclaren orange drinks to support your favourite f1 team this weekend?

→ YourUserName you know it. papaya pride! 

→ YourBFF2 she actually said that to herself when she took the pic. you’ve indoctrinated her

lilymhe cute post but you’re coming to sichuan with me next

→ YourUserName just name a date and time, and i’m yours

→ alex_albon what is it with you and stealing f1 drivers’ partners 

→ YourUserName i think that just means i have the most rizz 

User2 you mean to tell me that she’s in rome the weekend that oscar is all the way in america? so, she’s not going to be at the race 🤔

→ User3 she doesn’t have to go to every one

→ User4 i know but she’s said loads of times that she tries to make all of them

User5 all of you calling y/n a bad girlfriend but are we forgetting that they’ve already been together for 8 years, and have known each for 10. they’re at the point where they don’t have to be glued to the hip all the time

→ User6 literally. like they’ve been together longer than some of the married couples on the grid 

→ User7 yeah but it’s just unlike them. how do they go from being infatuated with each other to distancing within 2 weeks without there being some cause? it wasn’t a natural progression

logansargeant i can’t believe you didn’t bring me back a gift.. you said you would

→ YourUserName i also said i’d wear a williams t-shirt one race but we all know that ain’t happening

→ User8 is this logan shooting his shot? 

alexandrasaintmleux i knew that would dress would look good on you. you look radiant 

→ YourUserName my favourite shopping partner 

→ charles_leclerc my girl has good taste

→ YourUserName not if she’s dating you 

→ charles_leclerc you have hurted my feelings 

User9 y/n hasn’t been able to terrorise oscar on social media and it’s showing because sis has been dragging the grid in their comments haha

→ User10 she’s so funny. i bet they’re fearful anytime her name pops up in their notifs 

User11 i love how we all sound insane to other people but us oscy/n stans know we’re right because they’ve been a constant media presence since his f2 days 

User13 i hate to say it but what if we’re the reason they broke up? we couldn't stop talking about them getting married and having kids lately, and what if it freaked them out… 

User14 i can’t imagine oscar piastri without y/n y/l/n. i only really follow f1, not f2 but he’s always been oscar and y/n since he started. it would be akin to not seeing him in mclaren 

mclaren just posted

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mclaren get you a teammate who looks at you the way these two look at each other #unitedstatesgp

1,559 comments

oscarpiastri 🧡

racerbia team papaya! 🧡

User1 poor oscar, such a shame he had to retire after minimal contact

User2 not to be that person but it was defo because y/n wasn’t there. she’s his good luck charm 

YourUserName well done lando! 

User3 anyone else getting more and more confused by oscar and y/n’s relationship purely because of their media presence

→ User3 for info, she posts that she’s in rome the weekend he is in america, proving that she isn't attending the race. oscar likes the post but doesn’t comment despite y/n looking beautiful in that post (1/4)

→ User3 then she’s not spotted in the paddock, further proving that she’s defo not at the race. plus, whenever oscar was asked about her during interviews, lando quickly changed the topic for him (2/4)

→ User3 then oscar crashes and y/n doesn’t post ANYTHING about the race but when he dnf’d in bahrain and belgium, she put numerous posts on her story about how proud of him she was (3/4)

→ User3 and now she congratulates lando on the mclaren post but doesn’t even mention her long-term boyfriend?? (4/4)

→ User4 you have too much time on your hands and are reading too much into things. i’m sure she’s facetimed him to see how he’s doing and told him she’s proud of him 

User5 okay but if a man looked at me the way oscar and lando look at each other, i would marry him on the spot 

danielricciardo @ oscarpiastri first your girlfriend tries stealing my seat, and now you’re stealing my lando. you two are giving aussie's a bad name

→ landonorris you’re the only for me, boo

→ danielricciardo don’t lie. the pictures show everything 

User6 i miss when we couldn't tell if he was looking at lando or y/n like that. now we know it’s lando because y/n isn’t in the paddock 

As always, requests are welcome!

Baby Fever Angst Masterlist

Tag list

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[nerdy-novelist017]

https://www.tumblr.com/nerdy-novelist017/754460919348740096/benny-cross-is-the-definition-of-scary-boyfriend

Ok yes but also I wanted him to protect Kathy so bad and it just. Never happened 💔💔

We can fix it with fanfiction ;) Enjoy another one shot to pair with my Benny x Bunny series! Again this isn't the next part, just a little idea I had!

Word Count-2.2k+

Summary- Head wounds look a lot worse than they actually are, at least that's what you were trying to tell Benny, but he was so worried, you doubt he's hearing you.

Warnings- Blood, Violence

Broken Glass (Benny Cross x Shy!Reader)

The bar was crowded. You’d never seen so many Vandals gathered in one place in a long time. With an abundance of fresh faces wearing the colors, it was almost like a completely new club. 

Your knee bounced as anxiety manifested itself into your body. You weren’t so nervous of the familiar faces that sat around your table. Johnny, Brucie, Gail, Kathy, Wahoo, Corky — those people no longer made you nervous. They were family now. It was all the onslaught of new Vandals that cursed, shouted and drank across the room. 

A warm hand encased your knee, pressing down, firmly locking your foot to the ground. You smiled as Benny leaned into you, his lips softly touching your neck in a gentle kiss. His way of calming your nerves. And it worked every time. 

“Alright, I’m gonna break the bad news to ‘em,” Johnny announced as he stood from his chair. The bad news was that some new members of the Vandals had been running up the tab at the bar and not paying for it. An entire week had gone by without them paying for any of their drinks — and they drank a lot.

Brucie stood next to him, cranking his neck to the side with a pop. “This oughta go over well.”

“It doesn’t have to be a fight,” Johnny muttered with a sigh. Despite running one of the most revered motorcycle clubs in the midwest, Johnny was surprisingly non confrontational at times. He knew what needed to be done, he just didn’t like having to do it. “Not everything has to be a fight. It’s just going to be a conversation.”

“Good luck!” you smiled, giving him a thumbs-up. 

“Thanks, kid,” Johnny answered with his usual reserved patience for you and the two left, weaving their way through the crowded room. Benny started to stand too, but you grabbed onto his arm, tugging firmly at his jacket sleeve.

“It’s not gonna be a fight, Benny. Please don’t make it a fight.” You pleaded quietly, giving him your best doe-eyed look that you knew could get you almost anything you wanted. 

“I ain’t gonna make it a fight,” Benny argued but reluctantly sat back down next to you. “I can be civil.”

History begged to differ, you wanted to say but instead lifted your cold bottle of pop to your lips in an excuse not to answer. You laced your fingers with his as you brought his arm back around your shoulder, anchoring him to you.

Minutes ticked by and you fell back into a conversation with Kathy and Gail while Benny’s attention remained focused on Johnny and the conversation across the crowded bar. Voices rose in shouting and suddenly Johnny was shoved back by one of the new Vandals members. Then fists started flying. 

“Shit,” Benny cursed and, quick as light, slid out from your booth and rushed across the bar to join the fight. You called after him hopelessly, your pleas falling on deaf ears. 

“You think these guys will ever think with their brains and not their dicks all the time?” Kathy asked sarcastically as she casually sipped at her beer.

The fight grew larger as more members of the club joined in, and you lost sight of Benny in the tumble. You bit your lip, eyes surveying the crowd anxiously. You hated to see him fight, having cried the first time you witnessed it. It was unfair that he put himself into danger like that, without a care in the world if he got seriously hurt. But that was a part of loving Benny; He was always ready to fight with the drop of a hat. 

“Oh no,” you gasped softly as you saw a man twice his size suddenly appear through the crowd, slamming Benny to the ground.

Standing quickly, you barely heard the warnings of Kathy and Gail for you to stay out of it over the pounding of your heart. You pushed your way through the crowd, desperate to get to Benny, to help him. Bodies knocked into you, sending your hip clashing hard against the pool table, but you continued on, stumbling as you went. 

Finally you caught sight of him again, this time on top of the other Vandal member, beating down on him mercilessly.

“Benny!” You called out for him, but your voice was lost in the ocean of noise. Your fingertips just barely grazed his shoulder before you were knocked back. 

Suddenly something connected with the side of your head, a sickening crashing sound, and you were knocked off your feet. White hot pain shot through your elbow as it was the first to hit the floor below you. You landed hard on your side, the wind knocked from your lungs prevented you from crying out. The side of your head erupted in hot pain from the impact and it took you a couple of seconds to even register that you were on the cold ground now.  

Your ears immediately rang as if you were standing right below a church bell during Sunday service, drowning out all other noise. But the rest of the bar seemed to freeze in shock when they saw you go down, all stunned to see their youngest member’s girl caught on the losing side of a fight. 

You blinked hard, vision filling with stars, but you were able to make out the broken glass littering the floor around you. It took you longer than necessary to understand that you had been hit on the side of your head with a beer bottle. Attempting to look up to see the person who hit you, a cry left your throat at the pain of moving your head

Then that’s when all hell broke loose for the second time in a ten minute span. Johnny appeared in your line of vision, throwing a nasty right hook against the blurry figure of the man who hit you. He went down and a crowd gathered around him, legs kicking and fists flying. 

You blinked hard again, feeling something warm running down into your right eye as Benny’s face suddenly materialized before you.

“B—Benny?” Your voice sounded so small and you hated the way you couldn’t tell if he was real or just an illusion of the person you wanted most when you were scared. 

“Oh my god.” His voice sounded strained and you wanted to ask him if he was okay, if he was hurt, but your body felt oddly disconnected from your mind.

He moved closer to you, the glass shards crunching beneath his boots, and he slid one hand behind your back and the other under your knees. Then suddenly you were being lifted in the air, carried away from the chaos of the bar. Benny used his boot to kick open the back door and a rush of cool breeze greeted you first as he relocated you to Kathy’s pickup truck in the back parking lot. Pausing at the rear of the truck, he used the hand under your knees to lower the tailgate. He placed you into a sitting position on the bed of the truck, stepping between your legs, his face is right back in front of yours again. 

The afternoon sun hanging low in the west gave you enough light to inspect his face for any injuries. There’s a split forming on his bottom lip. You reached forward and touched the injury with a fingertip, trying to gauge the severity. He would need to put ice on it before the swelling started. Although you can’t find any other noticeable signs of injury, his face was so contorted in torment, in. . . something else you had never seen before. Not quite anger, you’ve seen that plenty of times (never directed at you).

You tried to catch his eye, but he was so focused on the spot above your brow where your hairline met your forehead. He retrieved a bandana from his jeans and moved forward. Instinctively, you leaned away, your own hand reaching up to touch the spot that drummed with pain. Warm, sticky substance covered that place and you pulled your hand back to discover deep crimson dripping from your fingers. 

“You’re bleedin’ real bad,” Benny said and only then did you realize that was your blood on your fingers. He tried again and this time you didn’t pull away as he gently pressed the bandana to your flesh. You gasped at the contact, squeezing your eyes shut from the sting.

“I know, baby.” His voice was barely above a whisper. “But you’re bleedin’ real bad.”

You knew that, you wanted to say. You could see it on your fingers, that awful deep red glistening in the sunlight. Your fingers blurred slightly and you blinked a few times to try to clear your vision. But it wasn’t your vision, you realized, it was your hands shaking. Suddenly aware of the sensation, you noticed your whole body was trembling. 

Another voice sounded beside you.

“Oh my god. Is she okay?” It was Kathy, you knew without even looking up.

“I need some water.” Benny said. “Please.”

That's when you realized it was fear in his voice. You’d never heard Benny sound so desperate, so scared. You wanted to grab his hand and tell him that you were okay, that you just needed a moment for the ringing in your ears to stop and then you’d be alright. Really, it was him that you were more worried about than anything else. You looked back up at his face, eyes falling on his split lip once more. 

“I–I’m okay, Benny,” you whispered, reaching for the bandana.

His free hand locked around your wrist, pulling it away from your head, stopping you from removing the bandana. “Don’t touch it, honey.”

The pain was subsiding, you wanted to say, even if it wasn’t really. You just wanted to calm him down. He let your wrist slide through his grasp and you reached out to gently touch his lip. “Are you okay?”

“Am I okay?” he repeated incredulously, brows knitted together. “Bunny, you’re bleeding like you just took on an army and you’re asking me if I’m okay?”

“Head injuries bleed a lot more . . . They’re heavy bleeders because of the blood flow to your brain.” You attempted to ease his worry with your fun fact. 

He looked unconvinced, pulling back the bandana to peek. “Yeah, where’d you hear that? One of your books?”

“Yeah,” you smiled sheepishly at him and Benny’s heart squeezed at the sight. You were so. . . small. So fragile looking sitting here with his bandana pressing against your pretty little head, legs hanging off the tailgate. Benny had to remind himself to take a breath, to focus on controlling his shaking hands. Had to tell himself to be strong for you. You needed him now. He'd be there for you.

Kathy returned with a bottle of water and Benny moved to the side a little, still firmly pressing his hand against your head. “For her hands,” he said.

She uncapped the bottle and gently pulled your hands out over the edge as she poured a stream of the cool water to rinse the crimson from your skin. You glanced down and made a sound. “Aww, no. My shirt. . .”

Benny followed your gaze to the once baby pink shirt now stained with booze and fresh anger coursed through his veins, setting his head swirling with images of strangling the man who touched his girl. You were one of the few good thing - pure thing - left in his world and the fact that someone dared to touch you, to hurt you, set Benny's jaw so tightly that he thought his teeth might crack.  

With the creak from the backdoor opening, Johnny and Brucie came out, rounding the truck. 

“How’s she?” Johnny asked and Benny glanced at his friend. Whatever expression Benny must have shot him caused Johnny to grimace. He moved closer to the two, putting a comforting hand on Benny’s shoulder. “Lemme see.”

Reluctantly, Benny lowered the bandana and Johnny hummed.

“Alright, ain’t that bad,” Johnny assured calmly and nodded at you as he spoke. “Ain’t that bad. The head bleeds a lot, always looks worse than it is.”

“See? I told you.” You quipped, fingers finding the beltloops of his jeans and pulling him lightly. Benny sighed through his nose. 

“She’s gonna need stitches,” Brucie spoke from behind. 

“Can you take her to the hospital?” Benny asked Kathy who nodded instantly as she stepped forward and replaced his hands as he moved back.

“Woah woah, what do you think you’re doin’ in the meantime?” Johnny questioned, already knowing what Benny planned to do.

“I’m gonna go kill him,” Benny declared as if it were obvious.

“No, Benny–” you started but Benny had already pulled away from you, making his way back to the door. He already planted the seed in his mind. He wouldn’t let anyone do anything to you and still have the ability to walk above the ground. This guy needed to be six feet under already. It was Johnny’s hand who grabbed his upper arm, Johnny who stopped him in his tracks.

“No, Benny,” he said quietly, leaning into Benny’s space. “You ain’t goin’ back in there.”

“He–” Benny started, unable to get the image of you laying on the floor of the bar out of his head. He wanted to kill him. He wanted him to hurt. He didn’t care if he’d be arrested for it. He’d been arrested for a lot less before. 

“No,” Johnny’s voice cut him off. “You go take care of Bunny now. We’ll take care of this piece of shit. Hey, you hear me? We’ll take care of it.”

Benny held Johnny’s intense gaze as he considered his next move. He wanted to be the one to take care of it, but the severity in Johnny’s voice, the rigid way his shoulders fell up and down with his breath, the carefully selected words– Benny knew that this man who hurt you would never be a problem again. Johnny wouldn’t let him be because you were an integral part of the Vandals. And they protected their own. 

“Okay,” Benny relented, taking a step back, eyes flickering to your small form still sitting on the tailgate. When he looked back at Johnny, the glint of his brass knuckles caught his eye as he pulled them from his pocket, sliding it snuggly over his fingers.

“Go take Bunny to the hospital. We’ll meet you there when we’re finished.”

"Okay," Benny repeated and he believed him.

-Tag List-

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[bamboozledbird]

Written in the Stars // Stiles Stilinski Imagine

Characters: Stiles Stilinski, fem!reader Pairing: Stiles x Reader, Stiles x You (no use of y/n) Word Count: 5k Tags: fluff, fluff, fluff, i love my men nerdy and desperate, all characters are over 19, my vibe is it's like their sophomore or junior year of college Warnings: NSFW, MDNI, unprotected pnv (terrible advice, babes, don't listen to these idiots)

Request: stiles smut plssss!!! anything fluffy??? A/N: request mixed with a lil bit of an old work to ease me into my first smut. still coming across virginities at 27, and that is really something. s/o to the anon who requested it lmao.

Stiles’s childhood bedroom is an assortment of Star Wars paraphernalia, baseball posters, and bundles of wrinkled flannels squeezed to fit within four faded blue walls. There are a few books stacked on top of his desk, coated in a thin layer of dust from the semester away from home, and little plastic stormtroopers stand at attention on his dresser corners. It smells a little musty in his room, a little like damp earth, but you’ve always liked that smell. You especially like how his cologne smells here—like spice, like fallen leaves, like Christmas morning. 

“The curtains are blackout,” Stiles says. He pulls the heavy navy curtains over the window facing the small backyard. The grass is yellowing from the cold of winter, and the air is crisp with the same bitter chill. You shiver and burrow further into the sweatshirt you’d somehow commandeered long before you and Stiles were a we. A few flecks of dust float off the plaid bedding when he sits down on his bed. He looks up at you and grins at the sleeves hanging limply below your fingers, “Flip off the light.” 

You turn off the light and shut the door. It’s dark inside the room now—almost completely black. What little remains of the sun is gone, and now you can only see the glow-in-the-dark stars sticky-tacked to the ceiling. “You must have taken a lot of people up here,” you hum, grinning at him coyly over your shoulder. You’re not quite sure if he can make out the glint in your eyes under the pale fluorescent glow, but you’d like to think he can. Either way, you’re sure he knows.

Stiles laughs easily and scoots himself down to the edge of his bed, “Why?”

“For kissing,” you say, matter-of-factly, but you’re still grinning. You make your way towards him, and your prowl is far less smooth than you’d like it to be—the piles of books and a couple month’s worth of dirty laundry make an already difficult path downright hazardous. You count it as a win when you end up in his lap without tripping on anything, “Doesn’t everyone want to be kissed under the stars?”

His hands, his wonderfully large and veiny hands, find their way to your hips. It’s instinct for him, reflexive at this point, and here in the dark it feels like the only thing he knows. You can feel his grin against your neck, “Do you?” 

You hum, playing coy, and absently curl your fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck, thick and curling a bit at the ends. It’s grown out over the last few months. He’s been too busy with studying for finals and working at the library to bother getting it cut. You like it like this, long enough to hold onto, long enough to yank. “I like the stars,” you sigh—so close to his mouth, but not touching—and then you pull back, smiling fondly when you see his mouth is already puckered. “Tell me about ‘em.”

Stiles groans and falls onto his back, pulling you down with him. You end up tucked against his side, shivering as he slides his hand under your sweatshirt to trace a feathery line up and down your back. “That’s like the worst possible genre for innuendo. I can’t woo you while I’m David Attenborough-ing about astrology.”

You smile against his shoulder, and he yelps when you nip at his skin through his thread-bare t-shirt. “You like a challenge.”

He wraps a strand of your hair around his finger and pulls a little, just hard enough to tip into a reprimand. It’s at least half the reason you turn into a brat when he’s this close. “There’s Andromeda,” he hums against the top of your head, pointing towards a small cluster of stars. “Those are supposed to be her legs, and that’s her head, and the ones over there are her arms—fuckin’ uneven, I know. I think that side kinda looks like she’s holding out one of those canes with tennis balls on t—”

You smile and knock your head into his chin lightly, “Wooing, Stiles.”

He tugs on your hair again and swears under his breath when a little whimper tumbles past your lips. “Anyway, she’s next to Perseus—who looks a lot more like Patrick than a demigod. I mean, look at him; his body type is like…something between Dorito and spanakopita.” You laugh, and Stiles squeezes you closer to his side, tangles your legs together, and kisses the tip of your nose like he just can’t help himself. “Story goes, Andromeda's mom royally pissed off Poseidon, so he sent a sea monster to destroy her kingdom—as one does when someone’s talking shit.”

“Naturally,” you hum as you reach for the hand he has cupped around your waist. 

“Naturally,” Stiles agrees, nodding against the crown of your head. You try not to get too distracted by the length of his fingers, bending them and straightening them out one at a time, as he carries on with the story, “So Andromeda’s mom is up there with the titans of bad parents—like right next to Vader and every Disney step-mom ‘cause she fuckin’ ties Andromeda to a rock as a sacrifice for the mo—” He sucks in a shallow breath through his teeth when you start kissing along the row of his knuckles, first little soft brushes that almost tickle and then a few lingering ones that wet his skin. He swears again and ever-so slowly shifts his hips against the thigh tucked between his legs. You take pity on him and rest your entwined hands in the small gap between your breastbone and his ribs. His exhale is warm against your forehead, “Obviously, Perseus swoops in at the last minute, slays the beast, gets the girl, etcetera, etcetera.”

Humming, you tip your chin up against his chest and look at him through your lashes, “What happens during etcetera, etcetera?” 

“I think,” Stiles rolls over so that he’s on top of you, bracing his weight on his forearms, caging you in delightfully close to his broad chest, “something like this.”

You forget about the game for a minute when he starts mouthing at your skin with just the right amount of teeth. His hair, adorably messy and sticking up in little patches from your fingers, tickles the hinge of your jaw. “Didn’t Perseus kill Medusa?” you mumble, head tipping back into the mattress, eyes closed. 

“Uh,” Stiles keeps kissing along your neck, obviously distracted by the hitches in your breath and the soft sighs you let out when he breathes against spit-slick skin, “yeah?”

You can feel the heaviness of his whine against your mouth when you pull away, blinking up at him with big, round eyes—the picture of innocence. A little lamb, an unplucked daisy, a gossamer butterfly wing, entirely unaware of the raging hard-on pressed against your inner thigh. His skin is warm through his shirt, so warm you feel it on your legs when you wrap them around his waist. “While she was sleeping?”

“Uh huh,” Stiles slides a hand up your thigh. The other one is pressed into the mattress, and the muscles in his forearm flex under his full weight. You’re pretty sure he’d agree with anything you say like this.

Unfortunately for the pulsing between your legs, you’ve fallen victim to your own ruse. Your head tilts as you recall all the unsavory details of the Medusa myth, “After she was literally assaulted by his dad?”

Stiles drops his head against your chest and groans, “You’re killing me, baby.”

You grin and curl your fingers in his hair, petting him gently and squeezing your thighs against his hips, “Tell me another one.”

He sighs and rolls over, starfishing his right arm and leg over the edge of the bed with a dramatic flop. “We’ll skip Orion and the seven girls he stalked.”

“Smart choice,” you hum and snuggle into his side. His chest is firm from hours of trying to lift enough to play lacrosse with werewolves, but it still makes for a nice pillow. Stiles’s fingers find their way into your hair, and you swallow back the purr rising in your throat for his sake. He’s been so good for you, after all. You don’t want the torture to be too painful.

“And the swan-fucker,” he adds, scratching lightly at your scalp.

“What?”

Stiles ignores your wide eyes, smirking, and continues playing with your hair, “Altair and Vega. That’s a good one.” In the blanket of darkness and under the strain of yearning, his voice sounds soft and crackly, like one of those singers in the black and white movies, the ones that dance with the microphone. “Starts with a gorgeous, sexy, incredibly charitable goddess falling for a lowly mortal,” his grin is sly as he hikes your thigh over his, squeezing just under your ass, “a lot like us.”

“Boo. Awful.” You pull a face as he drops a flurry of kisses over your cheeks, nose, chin—your laughing mouth, “Disgusting. I’m disgusted.” 

His fingers dip into the waistband of your leggings, tauntingly close to just where you want him, “You don’t feel disgusted.”

Now, that won’t do. You’re just getting started. You trap his hand with your thighs and tap your finger against the slope of his upturned nose, “Finish the story.” 

Stiles whines a little and then sighs, returning the palm of his hand to the little dip above your hip. “Her dad is disgusted that she wants to bring a loser human home, so he turns them into stars on opposite sides of the galaxy.”

Frowning, you squint at the collection of stars he’d pointed to. They don’t look so far apart on his bedroom ceiling. “That’s…depressing.”

“It’s not over yet,” Stiles pulls on your hair and does his best to look annoyed, but the nip to your bottom lip feels far more like a reward than a punishment, “hush.” He waits a minute for you to comply—or, more likely, not comply—and you settle back on his chest and arch your brow, waiting. He arches his brow right back and then keeps going, “One day a year, on the seventh day of the seventh month, Altair fills the galaxy with his tears, and every bird in the sky makes a bridge with their wings so that they can spend one more night together.”

The corner of your mouth tugs into a little grin, “That is a good one.” You trace little patterns on his bicep, little swirls and stars, and rest your chin on his shoulder so that you can see his pretty face, “But just for the story. Only one night a year would kill me.”

“Baby,” Stiles clicks his tongue against the back of his teeth and shakes his head like he's disappointed, bottom lip jutting out slightly from under his top, “it'd take a helluva lot more than a couple light-years and an immortal father-in-law to keep me from getting to you.” 

It’s such a line, but the dopey grin he gives you while he says it somehow makes it charming. Maybe you’re just a little bit lovesick. Okay, maybe a lot. “You can kiss me n—”

He’s on you before you can finish, but you don’t mind being interrupted when he's slanting his mouth against yours just right and groaning into your sighs with a gravelly pitch that makes your toes curl. “Fuck me,” Stiles sighs. He dips back in before you can quip something bratty, something that would definitely earn you another yank on your hair—later perhaps. 

You straddle his waist, sit back in the cradle of his pelvis, and lace your fingers together on the mattress against the sides of his head. He whimpers. You curse. “Off,” you mutter against his mouth, tugging petulantly on the hem of his t-shirt. Stiles is quick to comply, like always, but the fabric gets stuck around his shoulders. You let him struggle for a minute, just long enough to hear more of those petulant little whines. When you finally help him wrangle his shirt over his head, you’re up close and personal with his mouth. His lips are pretty—swollen, pink, and shiny with salvia and your lip balm—and you’re filled with the overwhelming urge to bite. You toss his shirt somewhere on the floor behind you and lean down, your chest pressed against his. You can feel his heartbeat stutter, like a rabbit in a trap, when you stroke your thumb over his bottom lip. It’s soft and wet against your finger, and you sigh high in your throat, “Pretty.”

His chest warms, and you wish you had more light to admire the flush spreading from his neck to his cheeks. You know it’s pink and pretty too, but you’d enjoy seeing the proof. “Pretty?” Stiles echoes, cocking his head slightly, and slides his hands from your ass to your hips. He continues his path along the sides of your ribcage with the bottom of your sweatshirt bunched between his fingers.

“Pretty,” you nod, sharp and definitive. You sit up a little so that Stiles can pull your hoodie off, and then it’s lost to the dark abyss. Frankly, you aren’t that worried about if you ever see it again. You can always steal another one after you’re done. 

He shakes his head and runs his hands over your torso, your collarbones, your stomach, just under your tits—he can’t see that well in the dim light, so he’s damn well going to see you the only way he can. “Pretty,” Stiles groans, cupping your tits and gently thumbing over your nipples through the thin fabric of your cotton bra. It’s simple, white, unadorned by lace or a pattern—and it’s sexier than it has any right to be, he thinks. He’s eager to rip it off.

You shudder through the entire length of your spinal column, through all the nerves attached, and arch into his touch, “Yeah?” 

He coos, and your nipples pebble in response. It’s embarrassing but soon forgotten when Stiles cups your face, big hands encompassing almost the entire length of your jaw, and whispers, “Pretty girl. My pretty baby.” 

It’s even more embarrassing how quickly you feel your underwear dampen under the scrutiny of some simple praise. Now, you’re whining, and he’s letting out a string of guttural, “Fuck,”s as you grind down against the increasingly painful bulge in his jeans. Your nails leave little pink lines along the sculpted v of his pelvis, just deep enough to sting a bit—enough to send his head back towards his shoulders. He sits up a little more so that he can grip your hips, holding them still as he catches his breath, and you’re only a little ashamed of the way you mewl his name in protest. Stiles shuts you up with a kiss and shakes his head, “Can’t come in my pants like I’m 17 again. That’s the worst possible ending to our constellation. Like a 1/10, definitely certified rotten.”

You grin against his throat, and he swallows at the sharp press of your teeth. “Oh, I don’t think that’s the worst ending. Wouldn’t the worst be the one where you don’t come at all?” 

Stiles’s fingers dig into your hips and he pulls you down firmly against his lap, like he’s scared you’ll get up and leave him with a weeping cock and teary eyes. “Baby, don’t even joke about that. That’s a billion times worse than letting a sea monster rip me in half.”

“Guess you can split me in half then,” you shrug a little, and Stiles goes taut under you, fingertips flexing into the small of your back, “unless you want me to tie you to a rock. I’d be into that.”

He growls in your ear, nipping at your jaw and flipping you onto your back. You laugh, a little breathless, as you bounce back on the mattress from the force of it. “Definitely wanna split you in half,” Stiles mutters as he shucks off his pants and kneels at the edge of his bed. He starts peeling back your leggings, taking his time to kiss each sliver of skin revealed to him despite the urgency in his eyes, despite the ache in his white-knuckled grip on the buttery martial of your bottoms. “Gonna wreck you,” Stiles promises as he brushes his lips over your ankle a few times. His words are filthy, but his eyes are honey-sweet and lit with nothing but complete and utter devotion—like you really are a goddess in the sky. You’re already wrecked, probably have been since he kissed you for the first time, entirely ruined for anyone else.

“Did’ya know that Vega is brighter than Altair,” he says, quiet and reverent as he drops your leggings. You blink at him, a bit dumbly, but it’s his own fault for trying to have a conversation while he’s sliding your legs over his shoulders and fiddling with the hem of your underwear. “By, like, 5 places? I think? That’s us too—can’t even look at you sometimes,” he hums, warm against your wet cunt, and hooks his thumbs around your panties. You shudder, and he smiles. You aren’t quite sure if he’s talking to you or to the glistening flesh he reveals when he yanks the baby pink cotton to the side. Either way, you understand his dilemma. It’s torture to watch him sometimes. You have to close your eyes when the pink tip of his tongue darts out, wetting his lip, tasting the air. 

There’s a sigh. So soft. Really more of an exhale, and you aren’t sure where it came from. It could’ve been you, or him, or the stars. “You talk a lot,” this time you know the sigh is coming from you. 

Stiles smirks a little and slips his thumb inside your panties, swiping through your slick folds like he’s fingerpainting, “Is that a complaint?”

Your hips stutter, and his other hand is quick to clamp down on your skin, stopping any attempts to skitter away from his light touch. “I love it when you talk,” you hum, leaning up onto your elbows so that you can watch him work. He grins up at you, almost shy, and presses down against your clit. A wet gasp bursts through swollen lips as your back arches, and Stiles isn’t so shy when he bends down to drop a gentle kiss over his thumb. “But I, uh,” you brush your fingers through the dark hair flopping over his forehead and squeeze your eyes shut when his kisses become kitten licks, “I also love it when you use your mo—” His finger (his long, gifted finger) slides into your cunt with an embarrassing squelch, and his lips wrap around your clit as he sucks. “That,” you whine, back arching a little until Stiles spreads his fingers over your stomach and presses down, “I also love it when you do that.” 

His laugh vibrates deliciously against all the places he’s trying to devour, and you think it wouldn’t be such a bad way to go—being eaten alive by your gorgeous boyfriend. He pulls back to slip another finger in your pussy, spreading them just enough to burn in the best way, and then he’s prodding at the spot inside you that sends a jolt up your spine—makes your fingers wind in the bedspread, pull on his hair, fly to your mouth when you start to cry a little. It didn’t used to be like this. Sex. Getting fingered, fucked, even eaten out—it never felt like this before him. It’s…overwhelming, sometimes. Most of the time, actually. You keep waiting to get used to it, for the newness, the discovery of it all, to wear off. Hasn’t happened yet. You don’t think it ever will. Certainly not tonight. 

“Good?” Stiles licks his lips, at the glistening corners of his mouth, and you toss your head back—overwhelmed. “Good,” he concludes, and he’s not even smug about it. More like he’s making a note in one of his case files, something to look back on later when he needs it. He’s quick about getting what little remains of your clothes off, and when he crawls on top of you, you’re immensely grateful for it. Skin on skin, nothing quite like it. Quick romps in the jeep, up against alley walls, the sink of the occasional bar bathroom—all fun, but not nearly as satisfying as being completely pressed against his naked body, completely caged in by his large frame. Sappy, maybe, but it feels dirty when he drags the tip of his cock through your folds. When he bumps against your clit, you mewl and dig your nails into his back. He sucks in sharply and buries his face in the crook of your neck, “There’s a condom in th—”

“Forget it,” you whimper, carding your fingers through his hair. It’s a little sweaty where it meets his neck, and it’s so soft, and thick, and perfect, and—he’s stopped breathing against your neck. 

He groans from a place deep in his gut, deeper actually, and his arms shake, “Are you su—”

“Yes,” you nod rapidly and wrap your legs around him, arms too, and your fingers join in on the clinging when they twist in his hair. “Absolutely. 1000%. Please don’t make me say please.”

He lets out a little laugh that stirs the hair framing your face, and he traces your cheekbone, barely touching your skin. Your head swims with the look in his eyes: amber, warmth, and worship, “But you’re just so pretty when you beg.” Not that you’ve ever had to for long. Stiles gives you anything you want if you ask him the right way. If you look at him with big, wet eyes, if you jut out your lower lip just so—wet as well, the little lick of your tongue is part of it; that took him months to figure out—he crumbles. He’s said many times that better men than he have fallen victim to far less beautiful schemes. 

Stiles kisses the pout off your lips and nudges the tip of his nose over yours, grinning like a drunken idiot, “Told’ya, baby. Not a light-year, definitely not a little latex.” His grin slides into a little ‘o’ when you slither your hand between your bodies and grip his cock, sliding the first inch into your cunt, impatient. “F-fuck—fuck-ing hell,” he grunts and takes over for you, squeezing your hip until it starts to hurt a little. You’d say something, but then he’d stop—and you like the way it aches. You like knowing there will be a bruise. He’ll fret over it later, kiss each mottled spot better a million times, and you like that too. You like being taken care of, almost as much as he likes taking care of you. 

When he bottoms out, when his pelvic bone ruts up against you, a long, drawn out whimper spills through your pout. “Yeah? Feels good, baby?” Stiles watches your face closely, brushes away the hair sticking to your forehead, and drops a few kisses on your shut eyelids. You nod, and nod, and nod, until he stops you with another kiss to your lips. He kisses you slowly, presses his tongue against the seam of your lips, and you sigh. The kiss quickly becomes wet and filthy, and you’d be embarrassed by the sound of your tongues sliding together if you could actually hear it. At the moment, all you can hear is his cock sliding in and out of your dripping pussy—and that’s definitely sending a dizzying heat up your neck. You don’t worry about it for long when his hips shift and he starts hitting that spot inside you again. After that, neither of you can hear anything over your squealing. Stiles kisses away the tears gathering at the corners of your eyes and licks his lips, chasing the taste. “Right there, huh?” You babble an incoherent answer, and he strokes your hair and noses at your cheek, “Yeah, right there. I know. It’s okay.” 

Stiles slides his hands under your back and sits up, taking you with him. The new angle is impossibly deep, and you bite down on his shoulder and wind your arms around his neck to keep yourself there. With him. In the moment. “It’s okay, baby. I got you, promise,” he squeezes your hips, and despite his reassurances and the strength of his grip, you know he’s falling apart too. He’s close. You can feel it. His hips stutter a little, change direction, lose their dedicated pace—and it’s perfect because you’re right there with him. It’s been building for a while, probably since he led you by hand to his room, maybe even before that when he smirked at you behind his cup of tequila and (mostly) pineapple juice. 

You cry a little and bite down on your bottom lip, hard. Stiles kisses the sting away, and your eyes screw shut as you start babbling again, “I’m—”

He kisses you again and lifts his hands from your hips to cup your face, thumbing along your bottom lip when he pulls back—not far, just enough to look at your face, shiny with sweat and tears. “I know,” he stills for a moment, pausing the movement of his hips so that he can just feel you pulsing around him for a moment, “me too.” You aren’t sure if you want to hit him or kiss him for stopping, but you don’t have the strength to do either when he starts what must be his final round of thrusts. It has to be—you’re a few seconds away from collapsing or coming, whichever comes first. When Stiles moans your name in your ear, soft and high like he does when he’s right there, and he slides his hand down your stomach to rub firm circles on your clit, you’re happy it’s your orgasm that happens first. Your abs convulse a little as you twitch around him, and you curl in on yourself as much as you can with Stiles in the way. He’s not in the way for long. Growling, he shoves you back against the bed and mumbles, “Where?” after a few sloppy thrusts. 

You mewl as he keeps the pressure on your clit, reach for his wrist and try to pull his hand away, but he’s determined and you’re tired. You twitch and throw your head back, whimpering, “Inside,” before you can think better of it. It’s his fault, you’ll decide later, for prolonging your high with his mean, unforgiving, wonderful thumb. 

He’ll blame you, for feeling so perfect around him—for fluttering, and leaking, and trembling better than…anything he’s ever seen in porn, and he’s watched...a lot of it, so he’s a bit of an expert on the cinematic orgasm. “You’re so fuckin—you,” he shakes his head against your heaving chest and groans, “you’re everything.” And when he finally comes in you, you’re okay with taking the blame for something that feels so good. He manages a few more thrusts, and then he finally lets you pull his hand away from your cunt when he collapses onto his forearms, barely holding himself up from crushing you with his full weight. You’d tell him to roll over, but then he’d be over there and not in you, so you put up with the sweat and heaviness while your head spins. 

“Baby?” Stiles hums noncommittally in response to your soft prodding, and you smirk against the top of his head. All the smugness leaves you when you finally feel the foreign sensation of his cum leaking out of you. Shuddering, you kiss his hair a few times and scratch up and down his back lightly until he’s able to breathe normally. He pushes himself up onto his arms and glances down when he pulls out, staring for a moment at the way your pussy gapes a bit, watching the trickle of cum drip down your folds and onto the bed. He rubs his hand over his jaw and licks his lips, shaking his head—at a loss for words for the first time in his life. Your tongue is a little thick when you fill the void for him, “Next time, towel first.”

He finds it within himself to tear his eyes away from your cunt and gives you a crooked little grin, “Next time?”

You roll your eyes, but your grin is stupid with affection, “Sure, next time. Maybe. If you’re good.” 

It’s a little disgusting, the way he just rolls over and pulls you on top of him with absolutely no regard for the various bodily fluids sticking to your skin, but you forget about the unpleasantness of drying cum and cooling sweat when he kisses you. “I’m always good,” he huffs against your cheek. You shoot him a look, brows arched and eyes narrowed, and he smirks, “Okay, maybe not, but I’m always good for you.”

You nuzzle in a little closer and scoff, but it’s true. Stiles is so good, always—especially for you. “I guess you did manage to woo me. You’re very sexy when you’re talkin’ astrology, you know that?” 

He smiles, wide and happy, and wiggles his brows, “An absolute banger of an ending, right? I don’t think they could chart it in the stars without ruining your pretty face, but that’s probably for the best.” Stiles brushes his fingers over your lips when you let out a little questioning hum and takes your hand, growling playfully as he nibbles at your fingertips, “You’re mine. Nobody’s allowed to see you like this but me—definitely not horny little nerds with their telescopes.” 

You grin and bump your nose against his, “You’re a horny little nerd with a telescope.”

Stiles tips his head with a sly grin, and you already know what he’s going to say—it’s still devastatingly adorable when he whispers, “No, I’m your horny little nerd with a telescope.” 

Adorable enough to make you consider pulling him into the shower with you, and if the heavy-lidded look he’s giving you is anything to go by, you’d say he agrees.

[thollandneedy]

Don't Tell 'Em- Peter Parker

a/n: I've been OBSESSED by this prompt his week, so... here it is

Warnings: None, but i'ts a bit spicy

Summary: Ned's sister have the biggest crush on Peter, and she thinks he doesn't knows that... but he does

Don’t forget to share, like, comment and leave your ideas here

Bellah’s Masterlist ���

Y/n was madly in love with Peter Parker, but he was best friends with her brother, Ned Leeds

Peter Parker was a popular boy with the girls, and Y/n never believed that she would ever have a chance with him. The boy was admired for his intelligence and beauty, always helping people to pass their exams or study, making his reputation as a nerdy loser be replaced by a sexy tutor. Since the first time Ned had brought Peter to his house, Y/n had lurked on the stairs watching the boys play video games. Even though she was two years younger, Y/n ended up developing a crush on Peter, which only blossomed over the years. 

On Y/n's 16th birthday, the girl decided to throw a pool party, inviting some close friends over for an afternoon of cocktails. Ned, in order not to be alone, ended up calling Peter as his companion, and at that moment, Y/n came up with a plan to get what she so desperately wanted.

A kiss from her brother's best friend 

On Saturday morning, Y/n woke up determined to get Peter's attention. In a few weeks' time, he would be moving to Massachusetts because of the university scholarship he had won at MIT. Taking advantage of the fact that he and Michelle Jones had broken up for God knows what reason, the girl had to be meticulous in her plan if she wanted it to work.

"Y/n, be serious. He's not going to kiss you." Lily, Y/n's friend says, rolling her body onto the king-size bed,

"He probably doesn't even know you like him." Audrey, also Y/n's friend, agrees with Lily.

"You're the worst best friends in the world, you know that?" Y/n grumbles, as she finishes the details of her PowerPoint presentation on her laptop. "Are you ready?" 

Lily, the redhead, nods, but sits down next to the girl, while Audrey puts her blonde hair up in a high bun, waiting for Y/n to take action. The three of them look at each other, and with an inspired smile, Y/n presses the "Enter" key to make her five-step presentation work.

"First step, the mood. It needs to be outgoing and relaxed, because he doesn't cope well with pressure. The music has to be lively, and the atmosphere has to be light. So no awkward or sexual talk from his side"

"That's going to be difficult. Are we going to have a girl group and not talk about sex and love experiences?" Lily says.

"Not around him. I don't want him to think I'm a sex freak." Y/n explains to her friend.

"You literally had laser hair removal yesterday, and you're a virgin." Audrey comments with a smile as she remembers her friend's painful story.

"Are you going to help me or not?" Y/n asks her friends, who only respond with silence. "Next step, Ned. We need Ned to fill up with tasks so that he can leave Peter alone, and I can talk to him."

Y/n moves on to the next slide

"Step three, the conversation. I need to be alone with him, and I want it to be in the middle of the afternoon so we can kiss at sunset." Y/n looks up as she says it, imagining how perfect her first kiss would be.

"Okay, slow down," Lily raises her hand in a stop sign. "You can't even plan the time of the kiss, Y/n. It has to happen naturally."

"Yes, I can, and that brings me to the next slide. The space. I want it to be outside the pool, and probably on the roof. It has a nice view of the suburbs, and you can see some buildings in the background if you squint. The woods will make it cooler at night, and he can even lend me his sweater if I ask." 

Lily and Audrey looked at each other in disbelief at what they were hearing Y/n say. 

"And the last one, is the kiss. I think explaining that would be too weird." The girl crosses her arms, looking at her two friends who were standing next to her, waiting for a reaction while still watching the laptop open to the last slide. "So?"

"You're crazy Y/n." Audrey lets out a loud laugh. "Ned won't leave Peter's side, and if he does, Peter will accompany Ned on whatever. The girls will talk about anything whether they're around him or not, and they might even get drunk and hit on Peter. It might not be cold at night, and he might leave early."

"Facts" Lily agrees, getting up from Y/n's bed. "Let it happen naturally, Y/n. I'm sure it'll be much better."

"Not a fucking chance." Y/n replies sincerely. "It'll be perfect. I know it will. Now, let me show you the thong bikini I bought." The younger girl gets up, goes into the bathroom and closes the door behind her. 

(...)

Afternoon fell, and everything went wrong

The sun disappeared into the dark rain clouds, and most of her friends were stuck in a traffic jam caused by fallen trees in the street. If it hadn't been for other reports of rain, Y/n would have said that this was the biggest storm she had ever seen. Fortunately or unfortunately, Audrey and Lily had left when the rain started to look like it was going to get heavier, leaving only Peter and Ned to stay with her at the house, while the brothers' parents were on a business trip.

"Damn." Y/n commented, looking out of the window at the power of the rain that had washed away several branches on the asphalt.

"I'm sorry about your party. We can celebrate tomorrow." Her brother, Ned, touches her shoulder when he notices the tone of frustration in his sister's voice. 

"We could have a movie afternoon." Peter comments, turning on the television and putting on Netflix.

Y/n takes a deep breath, looking over her shoulder at Ned and Peter, just agreeing with the situation the universe had planned for her. Maybe her friends were right. That plan was unrealistic, and Peter would never kiss her since many other girls his age could provide something better for him. The girl settled down on the brown sofa, pulling a pink blanket over herself and picking at her body as a show of displeasure. 

"Come on, Y/n. We can see whatever you want. I'll let you have a glass of wine." Ned tries to cheer up his sister by offering her alcohol. 

"It's okay, Ned. It's really all right." She lies, annoyed at the lack of her friends.

"How about Barbie? Or Mamma Mia? Or La La Land?! You love that one." Peter recalls his best friend's sister's favorite movies

Y/n smiles at the thought of Peter knowing her tastes.

"La La Land sounds good. Ned, can you make us some popcorn?" The girl smooths her gray sweater over her body, crossing her arms as if waiting. 

"Sure." The dark-haired teenager agreed, getting up to go to the kitchen, leaving Peter and Y/n alone on the sofa. The movie catalog was still open, and the wind was whipping against the glass windows, causing strong gusts that drowned out the sound of popcorn popping in the pot.

Peter watched Y/n, sliding his body closer to her, trying to get close to her ear. The girl dodges at first, looking at him with confusion and an embarrassed smile at their lack of distance.

"I don't know if it'll cheer you up, but I left a present on your bed." The brunette said quietly, as if he were confessing a secret.

"Are you serious?" The girl slowly cracked a smile.

"While you were taking the buoys out of the pool, I went up there. Do you want to go and see?" Peter asks, receiving a silent and excited yes from the younger girl.

"Ned! I'm going to the bedroom to see Peter's present." Y/n shouts as a warning.

"All right! No need to shout." His brother shouts in response. 

Both teenagers follow the stairs to the white door of Y/n's room, which is already ajar. The girl uses one of her hands to pull the door away from her gaze, coming across a white bag positioned on her bed, where her laptop was also open, but turned on its back. 

"Oh my God, Peter!" Y/n exclaims. "Is it Pandora's?" Y/n smiled, moving towards the present and slowly taking off the pink satin bow that was decorating it. 

While the girl was distracted by the present, Parker slowly closed the door behind him so that it wouldn't make a sound. His hands touched the door lock, turning it so that no one else could enter the room. The brunette smiled to himself, looking down at his feet on the nude carpet, and then over to his laptop, which had a flap open. Reading the contents of the slide once more, he closes the laptop with one of his hands and says:

"So you were planning to kiss me?" Peter asks, causing Y/n to immediately stop admiring the necklace with a pink heart-shaped stone. 

"W-what?" Y/n's trembling voice comes out of her mouth without strength, while her eyes stare at him in amazement.

"When I got to your room, your laptop was open, and I ended up seeing what was on it, out of curiosity, since my name was marked with stars and flowers." Peter comments, sliding his fingers across the comforter of the bed. 

"That's not... actually I, I..." Y/n tried to find the right words, tucking her hair behind her ear. "It was Lily's. She was dying to kiss you, and she shared this presentation by email." Y/n lies, causing Peter to smile.

"Y/n, I'm a very intelligent person, you know?" Parker comments, walking towards the younger woman. "And in 18 years of life, I've noticed a lot of things around me, especially about women. And I know when someone is interested in me." 

"Well, you're not so good because you haven't noticed, Lily." Y/n raises both hands in an "oops" gesture. 

"But I did notice you." Parker comments. "I saw all the times you looked at my body when I swam with your brother, how you passed by my table in the cafeteria more than four times just to hear what I was saying to other people, and how you turn red when I get close to you." The boy's voice became more present as the distance was being broken. 

Did the room seem smaller and smaller, or was he simply getting closer?

"I don't know what you're talking about." Y/n still denies it.

Peter pretended to agree, watching the girl in front of him from head to toe. He could hear her heart beating faster, and how her breathing became more and more altered as he approached her as if she were prey. The boy nodded, looking to the side of the room in an attempt to avert his gaze.

"Of course. I guess I really did get mixed up. You wouldn't cause this situation between me and Ned, would you? I mean, me kissing his sister?. He'd be furious with me." The brunette says.

"Yes, he would." Y/n couldn't take her eyes off Peter's thin, pink lips.

The tension was palpable, and even though his conscience wanted to weigh on his mind, Y/n's consciousness disappeared completely when his body was pulled to Peter's like a magnet. In a silent instant, their eyes connected as a request for confirmation that this was really going to happen, and their mouths met in a desperate movement. 

Peter slipped one of his hands around Y/n's waist, pulling her closer to him. The girl's red nails ran down the boy's neck, sending exciting shivers down his spine. The girl felt completely taken over when her back met the wall of her room and Peter's body pressed against her. Her tongue, desperate, was slowly guided by the brunette, as the kiss was guided by him. Low moans were audible through Parker's super-hearing, causing a mutual response. One of his hands made small circles on the girl's jeans-covered thigh, and unconsciously, she lifted it, bringing his lap closer to hers. Before he knew it, she was on his lap.

"Holy shit." Y/n said between wet kisses.

"Is that what you wanted?" Peter teases.

"That was much better than the necklace." The girl smiles.

"Y/N!" Ned knocks on the door, causing the couple to let go almost immediately, fixing their hair and crumpled clothes.

"WAIT!" The girl says, taking a deep breath and unlocking the door.

"What were you doing?" Ned asks, looking at Peter, who is sitting on his sister's bed analyzing the gift he himself had given her, pretending to be far away from the situation.

In an unscripted pause, Y/n looks at Peter for a moment, then returns his attention to his brother, looking for an alternative answer. 

"Just showing the necklace." Y/n smiles without showing his teeth.

"The popcorn's ready and so are the sweets. Let's go?" The brunette asks, turning away from his sister and heading for the stairs.

Y/n takes a deep breath, feeling Peter's hands on her back. His hot breath blows against the girl's ear, and he says as naughtily as possible before heading downstairs. 

"Don't tell your brother about this"

[astriddestelle]

It’s official Dandadan is my new favorite anime. I fucking love it. Maybe a bit too early to say so, but imma say it anyways.

Aira is my favorite character I can’t she’s so unhinged. She reminds me of Squidward, thinks they’re amazing, above everyone else, when in reality they’re just delusional, also peep the character development of her standing up for momo we love a woke queen.

The romance and friendship between Momo and Okarun is so fucking cute I love it, chat when is it my fucking turn.

Momo’s friends are fucking hilarious, I love how they’re not assholes. Usually when the character starts hanging out with the nerdy kid the friends ditch em or give em an ultimatum but her friends are so supportive I love it.

Why am I out here feeling sorry for the bad guys. (Cept the alien robot men fuck those weirdos). This show got me stressing over a weirdo shrimp man the fuck and wishing the best for him. Bros weirdly adorable.

Wouldn’t be a show about aliens if they didn’t have the cow being abducted scene now would it.

[thecordelialetters]

The Bionic and the Ballerina Pt.2

Chase Davenport x fem!reader

wc: 1,666

“There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves; it is not my nature.” — Jane Austen

Chase and his siblings save you from the falling elevator and you can't help but fall for him a little more

Pt1 Pt2 Pt3 Pt4

The next day you saw Leo exit the elevator and slowly crept up behind him. You grabbed his shoulders and screamed "Boo!" Leo jumped up turning around, "I really wish to not have a heart attack at school." He put his hand on his chest. You smiled down at him and shrugged "Sorry." We walked up to Principal Perry giving her speech about Emergency Preparedness Week. "An emergency drill can happen at any time. So when the alarm sounds, you must evacuate the building in an orderly fashion, like cattle..if cattle had acne and braces...and a future filling up my gas tank." You turned to Leo before noticing the space next to my empty. He was talking to his siblings. You gradually walked up behind Chase before moving my lips to his ear. "Boo," You whispered. It sent a shiver down his spine, he turned around finding his face a mere few centimeters from yours. He jumped back, "Hey (y/n)! How much did you hear? Um, we were just talking about what superpowers we wish to have." "Ooh if I had a superpower...hmm.. I think I'd want teleportation or telekinesis. Imagine you could pop anywhere you want! or move stuff with your mind!" Adam spoke up, "I like this game! I probably want Bree's super speed!" The siblings froze. Bree spoke up, "What he means is he also would want super speed like me! Because I'd always want super speed you know I could get places sooo fast." You turned and nodded. They were a bit awkward but you didn't question it, Adam always did seem to say things without thinking. You turned to Chase and placed a hang on his bicep "I had to meet Mr. Jackson before class to hand in some work, I'll see you there yeah?" His arm was really muscular. For a nerdy guy who seemed to study all the time, Chase was surprisingly super buff. "Wow, you work out?" You squeezed slightly. He blushed at your praise and responded, "A little bit here and there, I'll see you there." You winked before turning on your heel and sauntering down the hall.

Adam mocked in a high-pitched voice, "Wow Chasey you're soooo buff and hot mwuah mwuah!" He fluttered his hands up and down. "Hey don't make fun of her." Chase glared. "I just don't get what a girl like that sees in a tiny guy like you." But Chase had had enough. He was sick of his siblings, especially Adam ragging down at him. He'd like to believe that someone did find his appeal in this world.

Breaking away from the staredown Leo spoke up, "Hey, you know what would be awesome? If you guys took out your bionic chips and switched abilities." The gears in Chase's head started turning. Maybe you'd like him more if he was strong like Adam. "Why can't we?" "I call your super smarts!" "I call your super speed!" "I call your super strength"

"I call good looks and charisma! Oh too late already got em." The trio turned to look at him before laughing.

Chase met up with you in history a little while later. "Hey" He nudged your arm. You turned to him with a small smile, holding your finger to your red-painted lips before pointing to the teacher. "I thought I was the goody two shoes here." He chuckled. You rolled your eyes before punching his arm softly. After class the two of you gathered your things while Chase offered to hold your books for you. "So how was Dance practice?" He asked. Chase had never seen you dance before but was curious. He didn't know much about ballet except for what was seen on TV. You shrugged and replied "Same old, It's a lot of controlled movements. I practiced my pliés, tendus, and rond de jambes. I still struggle at times with my pirouettes but I'm close to perfection!" Chase used his bionics to quickly look up the terms you threw at him. "Wow, that does seem like hard work no wonder why you rehearse so much." "Hey, I would love to see you dance sometime." You smiled at his interest. Most guys wouldn't care at all about what you said, ballet being a "girly thing". "Yes! I'd love to have you see me perform! There is a show in a few weeks. We're going to be doing Sleeping Beauty. I can get you and your family tickets." He nodded eagerly. "Great I'll send you the details later!" You ran ahead of him waving to go to your next class. Behind your back, Chase was fist-pumping the air. "Yes! She wants me to come see her!"

The next day you saw Adam Bree and Chase you noticed something was wrong. Earlier you had asked Chase to clarify covalent bonds and he just looked at you and started mubling and laughing about ionic bonds and what even are bonds. You had met up with Leo who convinced you to take the elevator with him before the emergency alarm went off. You had been so lost in thought thinking about what was wrong with Chase that you noticed Principal Perry in the elevator as well. "Um, what happened why aren't we moving?" Perry shrugged, "The power is still on, must be a fuse. The one day I don't wear my tool belt!"

The room started to feel small. 3 people trapped in a small tin box? You started to panic, blocking out your surroundings you leaned in the corner and slowly fell to the ground. The nerves were getting to you, you put your hands over your eyes and squeezed your eyes shut. Being confined in small spaces was not your cup of tea. You opened your eyes again to Perry prying the elevator doors open. Eyes wide it confirmed the fear, stuck between floors meant that there was no getting out.

Noticing your discomfort Leo went to put an arm around your shoulder. Perry grabbed the phone angrily "Listen up, generation epic fail. It's your fearless and loveable leader Principal Perry. I am stuck in the elevator, repeat I am stuck in the elevator!" Leo quickly removed himself from you "Hey It's me Leo, me and (y/n) are also stuck in the elevator!"

You looked around, "Um Leo, why does it smell like it's burning?" A snap was heard and the elevator shook. You were panicking and breathing heavily when you heard a familiar voice outside. "Leo? (y/n)? it's us we'll be right back to get help." You called out to him in desperation "Please hurry" as the tears fell down your cheeks. Chase felt guilty, it was partially his fault, partially his siblings, but he was supposed to be the smart one. And now because of them, you were trapped in the elevator. He was going to make it up to you later.

It had been about an hour and a half of being trapped with Perry and Leo and you had just witnessed their... less than normal habits and confessions. You felt the elevator move up and your heart seemed to want to burst from your chest. The doors opened and there stood the siblings with concerned looks on their faces. You ran out as quickly as possible not wanting to be trapped in a metal box and threw your arms around Chase's neck.

You pressed your face in his shoulder, some tears soaking up in his. His hand pressed around your back while the other one held your waist. "Thank you, I was terrified." Chase tried to comfort you the best he could, "Im so sorry (y/n)." But you shook your head and moved to hug Adam and Bree, "Thank you all for the help. I would love to stay and do something more for you guys but I'm extremely late for practice and am definitely in for a punishment." You grabbed your bag off the grounding giving each sibling a kiss on the cheek and running off.

Chase looked at his siblings, "wow french people am I right?" He laughed off the awkwardness. Leo spoke up next "you saved me I owe you one." "Actually we're the ones that got you stuck in there." Leo huffed, "well then you'll be hearing from my lawyers." With that he walked off leaving the trio behind.

The next day at school you brought in a basket letting the smell of apple waft through the halls. Seeing the Davenport kids and Leo you belined to them. "Hey guys, I um wanted to thank you again so I baked this pie ! I hope you like it." You held the neatly wrapped dessert up. It was covered in a red and white plaid sheet with a red bow tied across. The siblings melted at your gesture, even though they technically were the cause of the problem never have they been thanked for their service. Even Davenport would rather give them a list of things they did wrong before thanking them for their hard work. Adam was he first to move he grabbed the pie and scooped you up with one arm. "Erm Adam." You muffled in his shirt. "Thank you little Lady this means a lot," he said before fake crying. Chase tried to not let your kind gift be overshadowed by his jealousy for Adams fowardness with you. He wanted to be the one sweeping your off our feet not his brother. He was thankful when Bree said "Alright Adam let her go, she doesn't want to smell your stinky pits." "oh right" he said as he let you down gently. You patted your hair back down and fluffed your skirt out. The bell rang as you walked up to Chase holding your arm out, "Well shall we?" He linked his arms through yours, "We shall." Before walking off together. Behind the two of you Bree gave Chase a knowing stare before scolding Adam who was already first first into the pie.

Authors Note : Im on a writing grind! so much so I think the words are burned into my eyes...

[tyforthevnm]

“If I have a kid, I’ll call him Dracula.”

All About My Year: Gerard Way

My Chemical Romance Screamo King and Unironic Mustache Advocate

From Blender Magazine, January/February 2007, Volume 6, No. 1 Photograph by: Martin Schoeller

Transcript below

Favorite new band of 2006 Mew, from Scandinavia. They're huge in Europe, but I just found out about them, It’s breathtaking fantasy rock. 

Favorite new catchphrase I'm tired of these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane.

What are you going to rename your adopted African baby? Dracula. I've always said, “If I have a kid, I’ll call him Dracula”

Man-crush of 2006 Johnny Depp. He's been a steady winner for years now. Ask a lot of bands in black, they'll probably tell you him.

Favorite new toy I got a Sidekick III, but it’s really just a Sidekick II that's black. I love it. You can AIM people back home for pennies.

Trend you're most sick of What are hipsters doing these days? Oh, right: the ironic mustache! Not that there’s anything wrong with a real mustache.

Favorite sign of the Apocalypse This video I saw of Kevin Federline listening to “PopoZão.”

Most outlandish purchase of the year I got the entire original Star Trek TV series on DVD last night. Our record came out, and I wanted to get myself something nice. As if I didn’t already have enough nerdy shit.

Country the U.S. should “liberate” next None. I think we should send a country some cupcakes. You think some cupcakes would cheer up North Korea? Kill ‘em with deliciousness.

Funniest YouTube video I really hate physical violence, but there’s this one where this kid is talking shit forever to this other kid, and the dude gets into this weird jujitsu pose and just knocks him out with one punch.

Ambition/hope for 2007 Quit smoking. That's my goal. 

Will you be our MySpace friend? Of course!

[strangemaleswaps]

Strange Christmas Family Swap

Christmas is supposed to be the time of year where you celebrate joy with your family and loved ones. But everyone has that one family member no one looks forward to seeing, and I’m no different. For me that person would be my grandpa. He'd always been a really cranky guy who, I swear, could find something to complain about on literally any topic. I don't know why he even comes over for the holidays in the first place. Maybe he's just lonely? At least my siblings are coming home. They're all older than me and left for college years ago. Sometimes I felt like I was behind everyone just because I was the youngest, but they always tell me to enjoy being young while it lasted. At least I still had my dog, Lucy, to keep me company. 

“Shoot. Ferris, we forgot to buy your grandpa a present,” my mom mentioned while preparing dinner for Christmas Eve.

“Does it matter? He's not gonna like anything anyway.”

“Yes I know. But it's Christmas. The time of year where you need to treat even those you dislike well. Could you quickly go to that gift shop and buy some cheap ornament?”

“Mom, it's Christmas Eve! Half these places are closed or closing soon.” She looked up a store on her phone and showed me that it closed at 5. It was 4:38.

“There's that one hallmark store within walking distance still open. You can make it in time! I just don't want to cause a scene.” I wanted to take the car, but it would take too long to shovel all the snow, so I walked. The store wasn't that far by foot, but it was still an awful time in the freezing cold. When I arrived, there was a single employee at the counter - an old lady with a messy bun. She greeted me and asked what I needed.

“I have just the thing.” She walked over to the shelf and showed me a little Santa ornament that was wearing a galaxy pattern suit instead of the regular red. It was actually a pretty good gift because my grandpa loved outer space, not to mention he kinda looked like Santa anyway, just without the beard.

“This is perfect.”

“Then why do you look sad?” Her response caught me by surprise. “What do you mean?”

“I can tell something’s wrong. It's Christmas Eve. You should be happy!”

“That's probably easy for others. But for me, Christmas means family time and I don't exactly like someone in my family.

“That's a shame. You're lucky to have a family at least.” She looked down at the floor sadly. It was clear what she meant by that.

“But since you still have people in your life I'd like to help you with your problem. Could I have that ornament back please?” I assumed she was about to check me out so I started reaching for my wallet, when she walked into the backroom with the present instead. As soon as the door closed, the power suddenly went out and I was in pure darkness until there was a weird purple glow coming from the door. All of this only lasted about 10 seconds and the power came back on as if nothing happened. Did I just imagine that whole thing? It was weird. The woman walked back out with a big smile on her face.

“Did the power go out or something? And what happened in there?”

“Oh nothing,” she said with a grin. “Merry Christmas!”

“Yeah, Merry Christmas. I guess.” She checked me out and I was on my way back home.

When I arrived, my siblings were already there, as well as my grandpa.

“Hey! It's Ferris!” said my oldest brother Calvin. He had definitely gained a lot of weight since I last saw him, even though he was an athlete in college. Looks like he still refused to shave the messy beard he started last year. My older sibling Sam grinned at me. They looked exactly as they always did - expressing their love of anime with a nerdy t-shirt and wearing ear gauges that have gotten bigger since the last time I saw them. My sister Em walked up to hug me. She was always the one I was closest with, since she was only 2 years older than me.

“I got a present for Grandpa.” He suddenly looked at me, and then to the bag I was holding.

“It's about time you buy me something! Lemme see.”

“Well not until Christmas.” Despite living to see many Christmases, Grandpa was still an extremely impatient person. He'd actually opened up his Christmas presents early before because he just couldn't stand the wait. This was my first time buying one myself for him (even though it was really just my mom sending me) so I guess he was beyond curious.

“Come on. It's basically Christmas anyway.” He got his large ass out of the seat and approached me. He was wearing a tucked in blue plaid shirt that covered the gut hanging over his pants. He stumbled over to me until we were face to face. I could smell the cigarette smoke on his breath, almost making my eyes water.

“Boy, give me the gift.”

“Dad, just wait until Christmas. You're gonna spoil the surprise.” My mom thankfully defended me and started walking over.

“Fine, but I-” He faked content and snatched the bag from me.

“Dad! Enough!” My mom shouted but it was too late. He had taken the ornament out of the bag, but clumsily dropped it. It shattered all over the floor before he even had a chance to react.

“Oh man.” Sam gulped.

“Now look at what you've done! You ruined my present!” Grandpa yelled in my face.

“Dad! Dad! Calm down. I think you need to go to bed now.”

“Fine! But only because your idiot son ruined my Christmas!” My mom escorted him to the guest room and Em picked up a broom. We both swept together as my mom walked back into the kitchen.

“Could he possibly be more…you know…” I started.

“Horrible? Pathetic?” Calvin added.

“Gross? Nasty?” Sam added.

“Your grandfather is just lonely really. His parents - my grandparents - let him do whatever he wanted. He's a real spoiled man. But I don't think there's any changing him now so let's just endure the day tomorrow and you won't have to see him for a while. Got it?”

“Fine.” The rest of the night was much better and I had a great time with my family. Calvin scarfed down the food so fast he almost choked, Em told me all about what college was like, Sam bragged about his new gauges, and Lucy practically flew under the table as soon as my mom dropped a piece of ham.

When it was time for bed, my siblings got settled into their rooms - Calvin and Sam sharing the same bedroom they did growing up, and Em sleeping in the basement because her old room was turned into an office. I looked at the Christmas tree glimmering with lights and decorations, excited to see what the presents underneath it would look like in the morning. It's a shame that Grandpa's present broke and we had to throw it away, but I guess he got what he deserved for being such a dick. I headed into my bed, where Lucy was already snuggled up in, and nestled up under the covers.

The next morning I woke up to the sounds of shouting, which was unfitting for what was supposed to be a peaceful Christmas morning. It was coming from the room next to me and sounded like my brothers, which was weird because my room was across the hall from them. But it sounded so close. I started getting up, to see what was going on, but when I looked around, I realized I actually was in the guest room

How did I get in here? I gazed down to find my stomach seemed swollen in my white tank top. I lifted it up and to my horror, I realized my slim chest was replaced with a flabby belly! How did I get so fat? I know I ate alot last night but this was ridiculous! The gut flopped out, to a bit over my waist. It felt weird knowing a part of my body was just hanging there. I noticed a bit of chest hair, which was foreign to me, but when I noticed they were gray hairs, it finally hit me. I was a fat old guy in the guest room. I somehow switched bodies with my grandpa!

I heard the voices leave the room so I stumbled over to the door, not quite used to the shift in weight compared to my old twink body, and was about to put my hand on the doorknob when I saw someone looking at me in the mirror. I turned my head to find that it was my grandpa…I mean me…staring back.

I really did look disgusting, not just because of my looks, but because I now had the face of an impatient jerk. I tried doing different facial expressions; it looked weird because I rarely had ever seen my grandpa smile at all. I noticed that I couldn't see my own dick past the belly, not that I would want to. It was probably all wrinkly and gross! What was I going to do? I opened the door to find Calvin walking to the living room. He looked pretty concerned, which was unusual for the carefree personality he usually had.

“Hey uh..Grandpa?” Fuck. Looks like I'm not imagining it after all. I hated this. “Sorry for the noise, it's just that…”

“I'm not even gonna try to pretend.” I spoke, but my voice came out gravelly and deep. It scared me a little bit. “I'm Ferris, not Grandpa. I don't know how it happened! I just-”

“Shit! That's great! I mean not because you're Grandpa now. But because I'm not alone! I'm actually Sam.”

“Sam?” It was actually kinda funny, Sam and Calvin switching bodies. They were close but still completely different people. I couldn't contain my laughter and started giggling, even though it came out as my Grandpa's gruff wheezes.

“Oh sure. I'M the funny one when Mister-wheeze-a-lot can't laugh without sounding like he's dying.”

“Hey! Well Mister-” I stopped myself trying to continue the joke. “Wait, how does that work?”

“The gender is all up to the person. Sure the…” they stared down at the new extra pounds they now carried and shook their belly. “...expression might be different, at least at the moment, but I'm still me. BUT the idiot who looks like me doesn't seem to understand.” As if on cue, Calvin in Sam's body appeared, walking in a macho way, something that Sam would never do.

“Check it out Grandpa! I'm an enby!” Sam gave a huge facepalm.

“Calvin my sweet brother, We. Have. Been. Over. This.”

“Hey whatever. I think it's cool. My face feels so empty though. Maybe I'll start growing a bea-” Sam cut him off right there.

“If you go out there without a clean shaven face, I'm shaving YOUR beard.”

“God no please. It took me like a year to grow that!” Calvin pleaded.

“Hey hey, what about me?!” I interrupted their arguing.

“Oh yeah,” Sam started. “That's not Grandpa. It's Ferris.”

“Oh man Ferris. You're a fucking old dude now!” exclaimed Calvin. He then poked my new belly. “Welcome to the chub club! Well…” He glaced down at Sam's slim figure. “My membership is on hold for now.”

Just then we heard a scream coming from my mom's room. We quickly opened the door, already knowing what happened. We found my mom staring at the mirror with a look of pure horror on her face.

“It's ok Em, we're all body swapped too.” She seemed to calm down when she realized that she wasn't alone in all this.

“Weird case of Freaky Friday here. Especially with Em….and Mom,” added Calvin. Just then my mom, in Em's body, walked in to join in the confusion.

“Well this is awkward. Two of my kids in each other's bodies, my own son in my dad's and I'm in my own daughter's body. Could this Christmas get any crazier?”

“Where's Grandpa?”

“Probably still sleeping.”

We headed over to my room, expecting him to still be asleep, only to find him flexing in the mirror - in my body. I didn't actually have any real muscles, being a skinny twink, so he didn't really have anything to flex. That didn't stop him from admiring himself. When he noticed us, he walked over smiling. It was a creepy sight, not only to see my body move on its own, but also knowing it's my grandpa inside there smiling.

“Hello everyone. It's good to be young again!”

“Uh hey Grandpa.” He looked right at me. “No, no! Call me Boris! YOU'RE the grandpa now!”

I felt so humiliated. He was actually…cool…in my body! And I was just the fat old guy that nobody liked!

“Dad, we need to figure out what happened so you can become your old self again. Ok?”

“Hell no! I'm young again for the first time in years. No way I'm giving away this opportunity!”

“I got it!” Em suddenly exclaimed. We all turned around wondering what she meant. She showed us her phone - or rather my mom's phone.

“What?”

“How we all swapped bodies! That ornament that Ferris got! There's an ancient artifact that can take on different appearances. It says it's been known to cause mischief when broken.”

“What kind of ancient thing is meant to be broken? How has it lasted this long then?”

“That's the thing. Everytime it breaks, it finds a new place and takes on a new appearance. But it always takes on the appearance of an object that its next victim will need.”

“Shit. And that's why the present seemed perfect for Grandpa.”

“Hey! I got a much better gift than any of you!” cheered my grandpa as he flexed his arms once agaih.

“But…how do we find it again?”

“Y-you don't. Unless you want to search the whole world for something you don't even know what it looks like.”

There was a deafening silence after she spoke those words. We all realized the truth was that we would never return to our old bodies. I was stuck as an old man forever!

“Hey, it's not so bad,” my grandpa started, seemingly reading my mind. He leaned over and lifted up my shirt, exposing my gut, and slapped it. “The belly is pretty comfy after all. You'll love it.” Maybe he was right. I'm sure I could make the silver bear look work. As I thought about that, I noticed a bulge starting to form. Grandpa turned to look at everyone with a huge smile on his face.

“Merry Christmas everyone!”

[i-cant-sing]

tt au

ok so im just gonna write notes as i read,

Baris is always starting shit. that mf. starting off the chapter with him roasting tf outta reader, like ok my guy. u must think you’re all that and a bag of chips.

mihirmah MAKING READER CRY? or like , maybe all of them calling her ugly and how lowly she is , is finally catching up to her. that’s so sad :/

awe damn. my girl just got cornered, i hope she’s legally able to beat their asses w/o dying 😭

YES SHE SLAPPED HER ASS, STUPID FUCKING HOE GOT WHAT SHE DESERVED

awe damn, not the scone to the face. this bitch crazy.

reader is TRAUMATIZED by baldwins attack , i think that’s another reason why people should STOP WISHING FOR HIM TO COME BACK!! that dude ruined her life and almost killed her.

Ibrahim asking y/n how he’s a slave? idk that is giving lovesick fool , cos? why u so interested 😏 u really listening to every word i’m saying and want to hear more 😉

Why is baris telling everyone we got attacked? TMZ much??

mihirmah and y/n scene, where y/n is all 🙄 ,,, ok sultana 😄 and mihirmah is like, that’s not my name 🥹 is so gay. that shit is so gay.

why r the moms calling for their sons? i feel really stupid. what’s happening ?

oh they both visited y/n ? OH I GET IT NOW!!! it’s cos they want their son to be the one married to y/n , since suleiman is so important and he likes y/n!!!

oh got dayum. y/n is getting her own personal chambers , she’s getting awfully close to the royal family 😏

ho-em-gee, Hurrem wants to murder y/n just cos of these rumors and doesn’t want her as her daughter in law??? at least Mahidevran is ok with y/n living. for that, i’m on mustafa’s side. just for rn, only cos i don’t want y/n in a bad situation

nawt y/n & baris actually fighting each other like sibilings 😭 i like how he clocked her on Ibrahim, 🤷🏽‍♀️ that’s all imma say about that

why mustafa say “finally” when y/n said she read all the books in their library? he like himself some nerdy girls 👹

omg brother and sister duo gonna get the girl? but for who 😏 cos that girl is Gay. she’s Gay.

ykw , it was wrong of me to assume mihirmah was going to be a good wing-woman , she’s laying it on THICK to y/n lmao

wow. i did not expect mehmed to be so romantical! “moon,” too cute! idk who i’m rooting for anymore!!

oh damn. mihirmah starting shit , and mahidevran is mad. bruh. when will y/n catch a break. also who is baris reporting to? hurrem?

i loved this chapter tho!! i feel like yandere vibes r already here with mehmed! mihirmah, is giving a close second. i just feel like mihirmah is giving some little gay vibes! or maybe she’s just a platonic yandere ? ugh watch me be wrong. that’s so embarrassing 😭 thank u for the chapter! it was scrumptious!!

i LOVED THIS REVIEW OMG BHFEBKWAHEHF TOO GOOD!!!!1

"Ibrahim asking y/n how he’s a slave? idk that is giving lovesick fool , cos? why u so interested 😏 u really listening to every word i’m saying and want to hear more 😉" AHAHAHHAAHAHA DEAD 😭

"why mustafa say “finally” when y/n said she read all the books in their library? he like himself some nerdy girls 👹" no no, he thought "finally, she spared me a look/gave me her attention"

"ykw , it was wrong of me to assume mihirmah was going to be a good wing-woman , she’s laying it on THICK to y/n lmao" girl she does not know how to be discreet because she's never needed to- what she demands, she gets. and she wants u to be Mehmed's girl rn 😠

[passcode58]

Not Requested |

Fluff |

Pairings | Chase Davenport x Cheerleader reader

Word Count | 1409

The hallways of Mission Creek High School were abuzz with excitement. It was the start of a new semester, and students were catching up with their friends and sharing stories of their summer adventures. Among them were a trio of an uncanny nature. Siblings born out of innovation, trying to fit into a simpler world. Chase and his siblings recently transferred to the school and he found himself ridden with anxiety, this new change in environment didn't bode well for him. You see Chase was known for his intelligence and incredible abilities, which he had inherited from his bionic enhancements. This should make him cool, hot, and popular, right? However, instead, he was a short, nerdy nerd with the personality of a snobby egotistical dick, who often bit off more than he could chew. Not exactly your average pearly-toothed jock.

Infact, his brother was the cool guy. Tall, dark hair, chiselled jaw, and buff. Funny jokes, no brain but the charisma pulled through for him. He knew he couldn't compete but he wanted to at least make one friend. He made his way through the crowded hallway, eyes set on the new scenery around him. The floors were a bit dirty, but they were better than the tube he spent most of his life confined to. So, he kept his eyes trained on the floor, until something caught his eye.

"And one, and two, and three!"

He noticed a group of cheerleaders practising their routines in the gymnasium. His attention was immediately drawn to one girl in particular. He didn't know who you were, he didn't know your name yet he felt the need to know you, as any teenage boy would. His eyes flittered accross the room and your legs came into view, perfectly visible due to the length of your skirt, or lack thereof. Gorgeous, dark, and muscular, he could tell that you were athletic. Then, his gaze trailed upwards to your hips, they were more defined than the lot of girls in the school– and well the face card pulled full time. Plump lips, a beautiful mole, and pretty doe eyes. You were practically a doll, a pretty little thing, especially with your goddess braids done up, falling down your shoulder like a waterfall. He was simply entranced.

Then he heard your name. 

"I'm sorry (Y/n). I messed up!"

"It's no problem Em. we can run it again, okay?"

'(Y/n), that's your name.' Your infectious energy and enthusiasm caught his eye. But also your beauty, but he's not shallow! He's not shallow for sure— 

"Cool Kat's leading the cheer squad again." Someone shoved him aside, rushing into the gym to watch you. Now he also know your nickname is Cool Kat, and your real name was (Y/n). You were appointed captain for your incredible flexibility and captivating smile. You had always been the life of the party, lighting up any room you entered with your vivacious personality. As the cheerleading captain, you took your role seriously and put your heart and soul into every routine. You were cool, hot and popular but in brief moments he could see you tugging at the hem of your skirt and biting your lip, eyes creasing when something went wrong.

He watched you argue with someone for messing up the routine but you also helped them improve it, giving them a second chance. "Vicious but sweet," someone said. "Yeah she's Hot and cold," but she's so…dreamy.

Like any ordinary teenage boy— which ironically he was not— he couldn't help but feel a strange connection to you. There was something about you that intrigued him, something beyond your athletic prowess and dazzling smile but he didn't dare to approach you. Not yet, at least 

"You know, bionic or not you could get arrested and a serious deduction in

social cred for creepily eyeing up the hottest girl in school." Bree says casually. Chase frowns. "I was not."

"You were," and now Adam joins in, stealing an apple from his bag.

"Look bro, we love you, okay? There's a lot of girls I'm sure would…date you— if you pray enough— but this chick ain't one." He felt that deep within because he believes it. He does and it hurts so he storms off.

He swore he wouldn't talk to you, he swore he'd stay away but god. He bumps into you in the hallway, such a cliché thing to do. His super strength sends you barrelling to the floor and tears well up in your eyes at the impact. It was hard, your leg began to bleed. Today was a bad day and he made it worse. "For fucks sake." your mouth was foul, he'd heard that about you too but he liked it. Not right now though, he panicked and rushed over frantically. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" and he moves over to lift you up but you don't like this. You hate it, who even is this boy and why was he touching you when you never asked for his help!? "Excuse me," You said and his arms were promptly pried off. The all knowing Chase Davenport didn't know what to do. "Hey I said I'm sorry." Chase repeats and his eyes soften. "Genuinely, I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to, please just let me help you, it's the very least I could do." You were still upset, hands trembling but he gently placed his hands over you, and softly said "Breathe in…Breathe out… It was like a gust of gentle wind passed through you. Normally these exercises didn't help, but when he guided you it felt different. You could hear your heart beating slower and slower and suddenly, you didn't feel so defensive or upset. It was an accident. He wasn't setting this up to take advantage of you like other guys, he was genuinely a klutz with garbage timing. So you let him.

"Thank you, for helping me."

"Hey, I kinda knocked you over in the first place, which is so stupid of me, again I'm so sorry." But his guilt made you smile. "It's okay, stranger. I'm sorry I reacted like that. I was really defensive…guys here can be weird." And he knows, given that, you know he's not even a normal human being. 

You took his features in. He seemed familiar but you couldn't quite put your finger on it. Noticing your gaze, he cleared his throat and announced "By the way, I'm Chase. I'm new here, and I couldn't help but notice your amazing cheerleading skills. You're really impressive." He didn't know where he got this confidence from, but his mind seemed to have been absolutely fucked when he saw your pretty eyes.

You turned to face Chase, eyes sparkling with excitement now. "Hey, Chase! You're one of the Devenport kids right? I've seen your siblings around." And his heart wants to sink as you mention his older brother chatting her up a few times and buying you drinks. Of course the older Davenport got to you first. Of course of course of course. "Thanks for the compliment. I'm always thrilled to meet new people, especially those who appreciate cheerleading. It's such a passion of mine! Although the circumstances are quite…undesirable," and then he's brought out of his jealousy by your words. "Your brother is so sweet but he doesn't seem to appreciate my cheerleading like you do. Say, wanna talk some more?" and to be honest he doesn't even know what to make of this, so he awkwardly shakes his head. Maybe it was a shitty prank but once they actually continued talking, Chase discovered that you were not only talented but also incredibly kind and down-to-earth. A bit snappy— he made note not to get on your bad side— but generally pretty sweet.

"Chase, you're genuine and I like that. I like you, I think we should be friends, if you don't mind that is, I totally get if you don't want t—"

"NO!" Upon bearing his output your heart sank and your eyes widen, immediately, surprised by this. Maybe he didn't like you?

"Wait not no— I meant yes, as in I want to be your friend!" and you smile. 

"Then take my number."

He can't stop himself from grinning like a fool, but he holds it together.

"I— uh, I just want to tell you, while I think you're pretty I want to get to know you for more than that. I genuinely think you're an amazing person and thanks for giving me a chance." And for the first time you didn't feel like (Y/n) the vain, mean, airheaded, snappy and arrogant cheerleader. Weirdly enough this weirded you out, but it was something new and exciting and you were willing to give this friendship a chance too.

I'm in love

[cheetahplaza]

he takes his wine sweet … coffee black and bed at 10pm or whatever hozier said in that one song

i love my pathetic middle aged husband he means so much 2 me ,,,..,,. he has single handedly forced me out of artblock. i have never once done a full page dedicated to a SINGLE character but here we are. i love em nerdy and a lil ‘tistic

[desultory-novice]

(He's cheerful! We need to make the most of it!) Noir! Think fast!

*Yeets a bunch of comic books at him*

I didn't know which genre you would like so... I just grabbed a bunch of em! A lot of them are action though, some involving mechs, thieves, and super heroes. I even grabbed a few slice of life ones as a nice cool down!

A pile of comic books, in English, French, and Japanese, appear from his phone...just like MAGIC! (...Or like a comic book. ^_-)

"W-whoa?! What?!"

"...That's..! WOW! I had NO idea I could get gifts out of this thing?! Technology is amazing! Maybe I should grow up to be a scientist?"

"I keep having these weird images of a lab in the back of my mind, but I don't know that I've ever been in one? What if it was a sign of what I'm meant to be when I grow up?" (I never thought of what I was gonna be when I grew up before. That's kinda funny, isn't it?)

"Anyway, let's get to reading! I can't wait!"

>Noir read a bunch of comics! >He gained 205 EXP! (Not that it matters.) >Passion went up by 3! >Inspiration went up by 1! >Spiky Hair went up by 2! >Nerdiness went up by 4! >Unlocked ability: "Replication Cosplay"

-

A Silly Little Bonus again borrowing @starflungwaddledee's Starstruck Dee (She should really be cosplaying as Mitsuri but... XD)

-

AN: So THAT's what that memory-based duplication of his is good for! Forget becoming a scientist, Noir! You could start your own business like this!

BTW, I'm sure there's a ton of different comics Noir would love, but with him having Tanjiro's same hair color (on accident!) and the protective brother thing, I couldn't help but make the really obvious Demon Slayer joke. ^_-

Oh, and given he's half (?) French in ancestry, I wanted to include a nod to Valerian and Laureline (one of my favorite comics and 1000% more enjoyable than that mess of a movie...) but I also wrote and drew this with a fever so that's all you get ^^;;

-

Noir's Field Trip Masterpost @kirbyoctournament

[danyayeni2]

Fancy a Date, Dollface ?

Flirty!Jealous! Tybalt (modern/1996) x gn! Reader

(Divider made by @/cafekitsune on here ! Check ‘em out ! :D) (A/N: Just as the title says, this is a slightly Flirty!Tybalt x Gen neu! Slightly “Nerdy”! Reader ! Also, a tiny little background information for this, Mercutio is your best friend, nothing more, nothing less! Of course, Ty knows this, and still hates it !) Key Terms (yeah yeah very wattpad of me bring your pitchforks): Y/N-Your Name Y/N-N: Your Nick-Name

B/F/N- Best Friend’s Name

(Also, this was made for @ladyinbl00d ! I really hope you enjoy this one especially !)

(Anyways, without further adeu, please enjoy !)

“Hey, let’s go shopping !”, they said. “It’ll be fun !”, they said. And, could you really deny them? Deny him? The party-animal? The fast talker? The cousin of the Chief of Police? Your best friend?

  How could you deny the sparkle in his eyes? (Although, now that you mention it, did he really have a spark? Or, was it his eyeshadow?) Or, his nearly high-pitched, pleading, and slightly convincing, beg of a simple, yet exaggerated, “pleeeaaaaaaaaseeeeee”, as he got on his knees, and wrapped his arms around your waist? Or, his promise to get you that new movie you oh-so desperately wanted to see? The Night’s Opened View, starring Angelo Manovincine and Catelynn Ashins, solving a murder in their high-school party? Drugs scurried around the place, sugar coated toxins covered the tongues of the most bitter booze imaginable, and hands covering cold faces, and cold cases alike. No, it was an offer you couldn’t refuse. Besides, you needed a release from your dreary, and unfortunately comfy, apartment room, so what’s the harm?

“(Y/N), come on!” His pace quickened and the intertwined grip between his smooth, well-kept hands, and your hands, “I saw some really cute shoes for you!” “Mer, trust me, I really don’t need MORE shoes!”

He paused, turned around to look at you up and down, furrowed one eyebrow, and shot you a look with an “mmhm” following. “Mer, my shoes aren’t that bad!” “….” “I JUST GOT THESE SHOES YESTERDAY.” “Creased and deceased?” “Oh, shut up.” A goofy grin followed his face, before running off into another store, yelling, “I’LL GET YOU SOME SHOES IN HERE!” “WAIT, MER-“ And he was gone like the wind..like always. 

“Why does he always do this?”, you asked yourself, out-loud, in fact. “I don’t see why he wouldn’t, seeing you talk to yourself would make anyone run off.” Oh, God. It’s him again. His slightly raspy voice, his sarcasm, his…eyes. Those Dark brown eyes. Those dark, slightly lidded, brown eyes. 

It was him, it was always him.

“I’d be thankful that a pretty face like yours goes a long way.” You see him look you up and down, and give his signature toothy grin. You sigh, “What do you want, Tybalt?” He smirked a little, and simply tilted his head, “Awww, don’t wanna see me?” He leaned in close to you, much to your feigned annoyance. “Not here, and especially not up close. Not to say I can’t see your whiskers from afar, though.” The corner of your lips turned into a smile, and you could hear the ticking of a bomb, slowly going off. Tick, tick, tick, tick. And you couldn’t wait until it exploded. 

“You just love that little cat metaphor, don’t you?” “What? It’s funny”, you lowered your voice, hoping Tybalt wouldn’t hear, “and cute.” “Cute? That’s what you wanna call this?” An idea popped in your head, and you brought him closer by a little tie on his somewhat formal black adorned attire, “Maybe it is, what’s it to you?” Your fingers slithered up his tie, as you slowly undid it, and he hummed in response, looking into your eyes. “To me, it’s unfair.” You stopped tying his tie, his words catching your attention. “Unfair how ?” “Unfair because we all know who has eyes that you can stare into for days.” He smirked more, seeing you continue to play with his tie. “And from the looks of it, I can, with how alone you are.” “Actually”, you pull him in closer, your mouth to his ear, “I’m with someone.” The venom poisoned his tone, as he looked away, feeling a tinge of jealousy course through his veins. “Oh..? And, who’s the one…?” Please be a friend, please be a friend, please be a friend-

“Mercutio.” 

Oh God, it’s even worse.

  Not only is their “friend”, but it’s that flirtatious bastard. Great. You bent back, and yanked on the tie a little, just before patting on it. And, he would’ve given you a reaction, had he not been consumed with the thought of him joking with you, smiling at you, all things he can do for you. “So that’s who left you today, right ?” You groan a little, and nodded, which gave him a little more satisfaction.

“You know, I can treat you better, doll.” “Oh, please, and just what are you gonna do? give me some flowers and wow me?” “C’mon dollface, give me some credit. You and me? We’re in sync.” “Oh, yeah? What am I thinking right now?” He paused, looking away from you, reaching behind his back, and pulling out two tickets. “If I were to guess, I’d say you’d want to see…..oh, I forgot what it’s called….’The Night’s Opened View’?” “Tease.” You thought, yet still visibly excited, and quite shocked. You hardly mentioned this movie, except to Mercutio a few hundred times, but to no one else ! So, how did he- “When we went to the store, I saw you looking at the poster for three hours. Almost like how you look at me. Almost.” Bet he wouldn’t do that for you. You paused, then felt hot. “So, it’s a yes, or do I have to convince you ?” “What are you gonna do, kitty?” “What I have to.” He brings your hands up to his lips, and gives them a peck, all while looking at you..it feels way hotter in here than before. “Of course, you won’t break my heart, right, doll ?” “..What if I did?” “…You wouldn't do that, doll.” He gets closer, his lips hovering over yours, hand on your chin, “You know you want me. You, and those pretty porcelain lips of yours.” “I want to make you explode." He chuckles, "I'll cherish you too, dollface."

You playfully scoffed, but deep down, you knew it was true. You knew that your heart was his. You knew that no matter how much you wanted to push him away, tease him, maybe even judge him, you always loved him. “Fine, I’ll go see it with you, but you’re paying for everything.” “Not a problem, you know I like spoiling you. All you gotta do is ask, doll.” He holds your hand, his thumb massaging your knuckles, “Oh, and don’t bring him along. I just want it to be us, alone.” “Him?”, you paused, “Who’s him- Wait- What’s wrong with Mercutio ?” “.....” “..Fine, I’ll come at 5.” He smiled, then immediately heard Mer’s laugh, and the corners of his lips went south. “We’ll talk later, yeah?” “Maaaaaaaybe.” He chuckled, “Don’t toy with me like that, doll.” and walked off. “(Y/N-N) !” Mercutio’s voice trilled in the air as he skipped towards you. “I found these shoes, and they’re SO cute ! Aaaaand, it’ll be perfect for our movie night tonight !” He hugged you, but you felt both hot and cold. Chilly and warm. Conflicted. “Oh, Mer, I’m gonna be busy tonight ! I need to see (B/F/N) for their ‘newest art invention’.” You applied air quotes, trying to hide the fact that you’re lying to Mer, and acting as if your “(B/F/N)” wasn’t the man you’ve been smitten for since God knows how long. “Oh….aw man….” He lowered his head, but you quickly cupped his face, “Come on, after I help (B/F/N), we’ll watch a whole marathon of movies ! You’re pick this time too !” He quickly smiled, and kissed the palm of your hand. “Alright, alright, I forgive you.” “Good, now,” you tap his shoulder, and run off, “LAST ONE TO LEAVE’S GONNA HAVE TO SHAVE PRINCE’S MUSTACHE TOMORROW NIGHT !” “HEY, I DID IT LAST TIME !” He quickly sprints after you, cackling, while Tybalt watches.

“...Come on, Doll, make a better choice than him.” His eyes shut, as the question that plagues him infects him yet again: “…What does he have that I don’t ?”

(A/N: Whew, it’s been a while since I’ve made a one-shot, and even longer of it being an x reader ! I do hope that I made Tybalt seem flirtatious in your eyes (and in-character too) ! I also hope that it isn’t too bad or incomprehensible, and that you all have a wonderful day/afternoon/evening/ night ! :D)

[obsidianpen]

ello ello ello!

been re-reading ng for so many times that im going insaine HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

-so! my nerdy side decided to write some things for now ?also I noticed the lack of comments on most posts? I would reallllly like for nerdy side of tumbler to join me on this journey :)

drum roles please may I present:

overanalysing everything in ng till I die or it ends (hopefully the former happens first cuz I cant imagin it ending)

spoilers and all that but I mean does anyone have chapters left? good for em ig lol

NUMBER 1: Harry's sudden ability to sense magic

we are first introduced to it when V blinds harry, after showing him the stars and the sky (im pretty sure V is a astrophile at this point) and harry feels Narcissa’s magic ‘’…felt…indigo, It was a subtle shift, a gentle one. apprehensive and…concerned. ‘’

and so it begins! harry is able to sesnse no only magic from there but recognize emotions through it as well. And his newfound ability is something omnipresent that helps both us-the reader- and harry himself to understand more.

let the quastions begin:

1-when did this magic lens come to be?

At first I though it was becuse of the new eyes V gives him and was something intended, but NO! story tells us that the blindness was a temporary result of the red eyes. basied on Narcissa’s comment on harry’s eyes. ‘’…they were just like your mother’s ’’ his eyes were indeed red, even while he was blind. (we also saw it from Vs eyes)

however…did his eyes transform to red the secend he was blinded? or did this happen -inbetwen/the same time- as one of the gifts ? As Narcissa’s first reaction to harry opening his eyes seemed like an over reaction to me if his eyes weren’t bloodied, and only difference was a red iris instead of a green one?

but but but ! while it came to be the same time as the whole blind era, that dosent seem to be the only factor here since its quite obvious that Lord Voldemort himself doesn’t have that power… 2- so if its somehow related to the eyes, why tf doesnt Voldemort have that power??? while I can bring hundreds of references, its crystal clear that V can’t sesnse shit like harry does, like how he can’t find him when has closed his eyes + under the invisibility cloak and many other times which im to lazy to go and find rn lol.

but honestly why tf dosen’t V have it? its quite the mystery!

while it removed the need for glasses and gave harry perfect vision, there hasn’t been anything mentioned bout a super vision? no being able to see extra details ? nought nil nada nothing?? and most ppl have perfect vision TR included???

‘’do you have any idea the intricare nature of what I did to blind you, and what I had to do to impart on you superior sight? Your corrected vision is a gift ‘’

why would tom riddle go through a very complex ritual just to have…like 0.5 point more vision? with nothing additional ? no extra sensing magic free on the house? thats kinda odd…

thats all for now? please tell me what you think and pen my lord dont you answer with that side eye emoji XD

side note worth mentioning here: so we know V couldn't change his eyes, even with harry’s soul. And we all know what he promised harry in case he tapped into their connection without permission…GIVING HARRY HIS EYES BACK WHICH HE CAN’T!!!…ehem so something somthing something? EHEM assassination? or elixir overdose? leads to something something which makes V tap into that to save harry? so many possibilities AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

ps: this did not help me calm down, I really need a calming drought with extra rosemary rn

Also tumbler fucked all my italica and bolds but ehhhhh idk imagin them on your own XD

Love u as always obi pen <3

👀

okay but instead of answering anything, I will add a point to consider: Harry sees/perceives/feels magic better with his eyes closed

[foundfam2754]

if criminal minds was a family, my pov

disclaimer: this doesn't include every character from every season, but on the characters that I connected with and fit with my headcanons the most -- i.e., these aren't fact, just how i see it <3

also i.e., pls pls don't be mad if we have different headcanons

the basics:

aaron hotchner: father, single dad, can be strict but will always listen to and be there for his kids, doesn't smile very often but has the BEST, most contagious laugh

david rossi: cool, fun uncle, gave the kids their first sip of alcohol (only when they're 21 though), the more 'chill adult', a playboy, but finally married their aunt krystall who is their favorite

derek morgan-hotchner: oldest child & son, very protective of his siblings, a little bit of a playboy but does settle down, smart without trying

emily prentiss-hotchner: nicknames are em and ems, second oldest, oldest daughter, very smart (smarter than her little brother spencer sometimes) and the most emotionally intelligent of the siblings though this surprises most people because she's very rebellious and very private - opens up to people but with time

jennifer jareau-hotchner : nicknames are JJ and jaje, middle child, quiet and responsible, very popular athlete, surprisingly kind of a badass when her family or friends (especially her little brother and sister) are hurt

spencer reid-hotchner: nickname is spence, youngest son, penelope's twin, very smart with an IQ of 187 and very sensitive, sometimes gets bullied but always protected by older brother derek, a bit nerdy like his twin

penelope garcia-hotchner: nickname are pen, penny and garcie, youngest child and daughter, spencer's twin, a little bit loud and boisterous at times but also very sensitive and kind, great at computers and majored in comp-sci in college

tara lewis, matt simmons, luke alvez: triplets, but not related to the hotchners, though they have been family friends with them for years and are treated as family

luke: very popular, football player and jock but not a playboy at all, a little quiet and secretly a nerd, LOVES musicals and baking

tara: very smart, loves psychology and crime-thrillers, very funny and and a bit of a smart-alec, loves teasing her little brother luke

matt: nickname is matty, very mature, very kind and very responsible, also a football player with his brother, often breaks up the arguments between tara and luke when one or the other takes it too far

other details of the headcanon

aaron is currently dating beth who will hopefully be the family's step-mom soon (aaron has been planning to propose for a long time and the kids keep teasing their dad that it'll never happen)

though derek is a playboy all throughout high school, he eventually settles down with a smart girl on the pre-med track in college named savannah

derek often gets into fights with his dad, especially when he was younger, but that's happens less as he gets older and when he finds comfort in savannah

JJ's been dating her high-school sweetheart, Will, since freshman year, they've already started planning how many kids they want and their names (as it stands: 2 boys and a girl, henry, michael and maggie)

matt has also been dating kristy forever, since high-school and they both want a big family

emily, jj and tara are an unlikely trio of best friends; emily has only ever told the other two her biggest fear

derek, matt and luke are also best friends and often include spencer in their hang-outs

penelope and luke were very 'will they, won't they' for a long time because penelope often resisted luke's charm because she was afraid of getting hurt, but eventally start dating and are everyone's favorite couple

penelope dated a bunch of assholes before luke (kevin, shane, tyler) and is part of the reason why she was afraid to date luke -- luke is aware of this and does her best to treat her like a queen

spencer just started dating max but can see himself marrying this girl; max has helped him come out of his shell

spencer is the older twin by 5 minutes and often holds this over penelope's head

matt is the oldest triplet, then tara and then luke (who is the baby and treated as such by his siblings)

spencer and penelope are built-in best friends and watch doctor-who, marvel and star-trek marathons together -- max and luke join these when each couple starts dating

tara, luke and matt often see aaron/dave as parental figures and lean on them for support

they are all very protective of each other, but everyone is the most protective of penelope

tara and penelope call luke 'lukey' as a nickname to bug him, but he secretly loves it

the eight kids (penelope, luke, matt, tara, emily, jj, spencer, derek) don't have that much of an age gap between them so they are all very close, hang-out a lot and very much fit the found-family trope

dave and aaron take the kids (including matt, tara and luke) on a family trip every year -- 2024 is going to be a beach trip

Okay, I have a lot more, but these are some :) love to hear your thoughts on this