#they also look closer to how i actually draw them nowadays lmao

[fragmentedink-archived]

Hell to Pay: Chapter Twenty-Four

I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, VIII, IX, X, XI, XII, XIII, XIV, XV, XVI, IX, IX, XX, XXI, XXII, XXIII

cowritten by: @lux-scriptum

A/N: lmao trigger warnings everywhere. just. torture, blood, excessive violence????

A week later, Cameron was in his office at the club, filing through the paperwork when someone knocked at the door. Cameron got up and answered the door, halfway annoyed to see his bartender standing there instead of actually doing his damn job. “What do you want?”

“There’s someone asking for you,” Zareth said, looking appropriately nervous at disrupting him. “He, um, said that he knew you? From… before.”

“From before?” Cameron deadpanned. “Before what? Spell it out for me.”

Zareth seemed to grow more and more uncomfortable. “Before… your mother died.”

Cameron rolled his eyes at that pathetic excuse of a nonanswer and shouldered his way past him. He could hear Zareth following after him, and went to scurry back behind the bar to continue at his job. Cameron nearly stopped in his tracks when he saw the familiar cropped ash-gold hair of the man sitting at the bar, nursing a whiskey. “Can I help you?” he asked, coolly.

His brother turned to face him, granite face shifting into a faint smile. “Long time no see, Cam. I do like what you’ve done with the place. New counters?”

Cameron looked down at the pristine onyx countertops that nearly glowed with his reflection. There wasn’t a single speck of dust on them, but still Cameron swiped a few fingers over them and clicked his tongue. “Clearly, you cannot do the most mundane of jobs and keep my counters clean, Zareth. Go take your lunch before I fire you for your incompetence.”

Destris looked faintly amused when Zareth’s mouth opened and closed, before wisely bowing out of the room. Cameron leaned against the counter. “Good help is so hard to find nowadays. What can I do for you, Des.”

Destris looked Cameron over thoroughly enough, the back of his neck prickled. “You have come a long way from the bed-warming whore I remember. What’s it been? Nearly four years since you let them kill my mother and stole my title from me?”

“You mean our mother?” he asked, coolly. “The one that consorted with angels?”

Des waved him off. “You don’t actually believe that she was going to side with them, do you?”

“I think she was a power hungry leech, just like you,” Cameron said, flatly. “What do you want?”

Des chuckled lightly and finished off his whiskey before standing and reaching over the counter to grab Cameron by the throat. “I want what’s mine.”

Cameron instinctively went pliant, any and all words dying in his throat as that ancient training kicked in. Destris still had ahold of Cameron’s throat as he came around the corner of the bar and slammed Cameron’s face in to the corner of the bar.

Warm blood rushed down the side of Cameron’s face, getting into his mouth and soaking his shirt. Cameron could almost taste the metallic of his venom and blocked it out when Destris leaned in closer. “Are you even going to fight back? Or do you just not want to,” he said, sharp teeth glinting in the club lighting. “You know your place. And it’s not on your feet. It’s on your knees. A good little whore. Do you even know what it takes to do this job, or are you just sucking cock to get by?”

Cameron didn’t respond. He lost any ability to argue his brother’s point and just looked up at him. When Destris realized he wasn't getting a response, he went back to throwing Cameron around his own club, including smashing his face into the piano keyboard and then promptly broke each finger one by one.

Cameron could barely form a coherent thought beyond just sheer pain. Just enough to hope that Zareth wasn’t enough of an idiot to be here before Destris was done with his temper tantrum.

Cameron wheezed through the sharp pain in his ribs when Destris flipped him over the back of the piano, pressing Cameron’s face against the cool black finish. He couldn’t see his reflection beyond the sheer amount of blood coating it. Cameron stiffened when he felt the telltale sharpness of a blade against his spine.

“I see you’ve been healing,” Destris said, cutting through the silk and spreading open his shirt. The blade drug over the scars on Cameron’s shoulder blades. “Was it your newest toy that did it? Can’t stomach the demons healing you so you let the angel do it?”

“No,” Cameron choked out.

He didn’t let Lev heal him. And part of him even wondered how Destris knew about Lev in the first place. It wasn’t like all that many knew who Lev was, let alone that he had been sleeping with him.

“Hmm. Well, I suppose it doesn't matter. Not like they’ll be staying like this.”

Cameron squeezed his eyes shut when he felt the weight of the blade from his back disappear and then nearly blacked out when he felt it plunge into one of the scars and drag down the length of his back. Cameron bit his lip to stop himself from screaming when he felt the blade drag back up his back before pulling back and moving to the second scar.

Cameron had no choice but to crumple to the ground when Des pulled back, dropping the bloody blade down beside Cam’s head. He leaned over Cameron, that faint smile still in place. “I do enjoy our times together, Cameron. I hope we can get together again, but unfortunately I have another engagement that I must get to.”

He pushed the toe of his shoe beneath Cameron’s chin before leaving Cameron in a puddle of his own blood. Cameron didn’t know how long he was laying there bleeding out before he barely heard the backdoor open and a small “what the fuck?” from Zareth before he heard the demon moving through the club and coming to kneel next to him.

Zareth’s pale gold eyes looked over the blood and bruises covering Cameron’s body and the last thing Cameron saw before blacking out was this bartender reaching over to pick him up.

----

“No, see, I just don’t think you’re drinking it right?” Nik said, splaying his hands on the counter. “How can you not like coffee. You’re dating me, right? You’re related to Amara, right? I’m calling bullshit, Lev. You’re lying to me.”

“It’s too bitter,” Lev said, in a petulant tone, flipping the page of his book.

“Mmm. No, it’s not if you’re drinking it right. And I don’t think you are. Some people can’t drink it black because they’re babies, but that’s why we invented sugar and milk and all that other shit people put in their coffee.”

“I tried that, it’s still gross.”

“Yeah, well, I think you’re gross.”

Lev deigned to flick his eyes up from the baby book he had been pouring his attention into instead of Nik. “You didn’t think I was gross when you were in my ass last night.”

Nik pointed at him over the counter. “I have been in much grosser men’s asses, Levant. And that is not something I am proud of. Just like you shouldn’t be proud of the fact that you don’t like coffee, you infant.”

“And I don’t need coffee to get up in the morning,” he said, turning back to the book.

“Well, would you like an award?” Nik asked. “Because I’m sure that is impressive to someone.” When Lev didn’t respond, Nik reached over the counter and slammed his hand down hard to knock the book out of Lev’s hand. “Levvvvv, pay attention to me.”

Lev gave him a dirty look and went to pick his book back up. “I am perfectly content with milk and honey, Nik.”

“You disgust me,” Nik said, mournfully.

Before Lev could respond, someone was beating on the door. He debated on letting the sentries get it, but got up from the table. “Sit here and reflect,” Nik said, starting for the doorway. “Think about your life choices.”

Nik rounded the corner, but could hear Lev behind him. “Hmph,” Nik said. “Clearly you don’t listen.” He shooed the sentries back from the door and swung it open, but went cold all over when Zareth was standing there carrying Cameron. “What-”

“Do you have somewhere I can put him?” Zareth asked, face tight. “He’s um. Quite heavy. Also needs a healer.”

Nik moved out of the way without a word and looked over at Lev, who was frozen in place, staring at Cameron’s blood-soaked body. Nik forced words into his mouth. “His room,” he rasped. “Down the hall. Lev, go get Sazra.”

“No,” Lev said. “I’m a better healer than she is.”

Zareth wasn’t listening and was already moving down the hall. Nik started after him, saying, “Fine. Just. Yeah, okay.” He pushed open the bedroom door and let Zareth inside. Zareth had Cam on the bed, when Nik demanded, “What the flying fuck happened to my boyfriend? And why aren’t you wounded? You going to tell me he just happened to get the living hell beat out of him while you were on lunch break?”

“Nik,” Lev said, shrugging out of his hoodie and climbing onto the bed with Cameron. “Keep it down.”

Nik growled, but didn’t argue, instead kept his focus on Zareth’s guilt-ridden face. “That’s exactly what happened,” Zareth said. “I was serving a customer who came to see Cameron and Cameron made me leave. If I had known-”

“Well, you should have known!” Nik snapped. “Aren’t you some ex-soldier bullshit. What happened to those damn instincts. I know you bastards have them. Don’t tell me you don’t. What exactly did this customer look like? Tall, short? Pink, purple? Orange? For fucks sake, Zareth.”

Lev cut Nik a look. “Nik. Let him speak.”

“Do you see me shoving a gag in his mouth?” Nik retorted. “No, I am not. He is perfectly capable of speaking, Levant. Don’t tell me what the fuck to do.”

“Look,” Zareth said, sharply. “I’ll tell you everything I remember. He said he knew Cameron from before… from before. He was tall, about Cameron’s height with green eyes and dirty blond hair. Suit, unsettling smile- he. He’s just- Cameron. He’s Cameron. But worse.”

“‘Cameron but worse’,” Nik echoed. “Well that solves the mystery of whodunit, now doesn’t it?” But still, the cold tracing his bones didn’t help that he was able to draw a relatively rough picture in his mind, especially when he had a file he had gathered. “If you knew he was worse,” Nik bit out, “then why did you leave him alone?”

“Because I was doing my damned job, Nik!” Zareth half growled at him. “Cameron is my boss and he pays me very well so I do exactly what the fuck he says to the damn letter. He wanted me gone, so I left. That’s it.”

“Well congrats,” Nik deadpanned. “I do hope you still get paid if Cam ends up not being able to sign those paychecks for you anymore.”

“Go get Sazra,” Lev cut in. “I can’t do this on my own.”

“I thought you could?” Nik said. “Didn’t you say you were a better healer than her?” But he started to storm out of the room anyway, half running down the damn hall and down the stairs to where she was stationed. The closed in walls nearly choked the air out of his lungs, but he beat his hand on the door until it opened. “Get upstairs and do your damn job. Cameron’s hurt.”

Sazra didn’t answer him and stormed past him, running for the stairs, long black hair getting pulled back into a bun while she disappeared. Nik was following her and went to find Lev still leaned over Cameron, trying to heal him.

The sheets were already soaked through, blood dripping onto the floor. But the only thing going through Nik’s mind was that Cameron was going to be pissed about the amount of blood he was going to have to clean out of his floors.

Sazra snapped at Lev, “Get out of my way. You- get him on his stomach.” that was clearly directed at Zareth, who was just standing there like a damned idiot. For someone who was so versed in warfare, Nik didn’t know why he was being so damn useless to him.

But Zareth was moving, doing as told and moving Cameron onto his stomach. Nik’s throat went tight when he saw the gaping wounds slashed down his shoulder blades, in the same place his old scars were. “Did- is there any defensive wounds? Tell me he at least got a piece of the bastard,” Nik rasped.

Sazra didn’t bother answering him, and Nik felt like he was being suffocated by this damn room. It just wasn’t like them to have a fucking week of normality before one of them nearly got offed. And from the looks of it, Nik doubted Cameron even fought back. Which- made no damn sense considering Cameron’s apparent survival instincts. Though, clearly that was all just bullshit.

Nik nearly jolted when he felt the warm hand slide in his. “Come on,” Lev said, tiredly. “We’re not doing any good just standing here. Zareth, I need your help in the kitchen, please.” Lev paused, and looked at Sazra. “Please come tell us when you’re- when you’re done.”

When Lev drug him out of the room, Nik muttered, “If he dies, I’m going to fucking kill him. That bastard can’t do this to me.”

Lev tugged on Nik’s hand. “He’ll be fine,” Lev said, clearly trying to make NIk feel better.

“Oh?” Nik asked, despite letting Lev lead him to the kitchen. “Are you an oracle now? Can you see the future? I didn’t realize that was one of your powers, Lev.”

“Stop being a dick, Nik,” Lev said with surprising force. “Zareth, can you please make him a drink? A strong one?”

Zareth instantly went to work, helping himself to Cameron’s booze while Lev decidedly went to cry on the counter. Nik dropped onto the stool and folded his arms, shoving the pricking feeling in his face as far down as he possibly could.

Nik scratched at his wrists, trying to pick at his skin to stop himself from freaking out even more. This was absolute bullshit and he didn’t know what to do. This was clearly his fault because he didn't kill that bastard the moment he decided to go after Agra. Multitasking was possible, and yet he didn’t do it because he was too focused on Cameron’s father to even think about going after this one too. He was a damned idiot for not thinking ahead.

Nik’s head snapped up when Lev touched his arm. “Hold me?” Lev asked. When Nik nodded, Lev slipped into Nik’s lap, dragging Nik’s arms around his waist while he buried his face in Nik’s shoulder, deciding to go ahead and break down again.

The next thing he knew there was a cold drink pressed into his hand. Zareth said, “Would you like one too? Or… can you not have one?” Nik looked up to see Zareth looking at the baby book still on the counter.

Lev sniffled. “No, I just get sick when I drink. I’m not pregnant.”

“Of course he’s not pregnant,” Nik muttered, downing half his drink. “Does he look it?”

“You guys are just plumping me up,” Lev mumbled against Nik’s neck. “Are you going to shove me into a pot?”

“Not yet,” Nik said, finishing off his drink and holding out his glass to Zareth. “Make me another one.”

Lev bit down on Nik’s shoulder before looking at Zareth, adding a “Please,” to Nik’s instructions. “You don’t have to be rude,” he mumbled into Nik’s shoulder.

“I wasn’t being rude,” Nik said, watching Zareth make Nik a drink. “Was I?”

“You were being downright charming,” Zareth said, putting a new drink back in Nik’s hand. “Just like always.”

“See?”

“I think it’d kill you to be polite for once in your life,” Lev said. “Saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ are the basics- the first things they teach you in school.

Nik stood and sat Lev down on the counter. He took a drink from his glass, leaning against the counter next to Lev’s leg looking up at him. “Yeah, I was the kid that smoked behind the bleachers with the tweakers, Lev. I don’t give a shit.”

“That’s not something to be proud of,” Lev said.

“Again, I reiterate: I don’t give a shit.” Nik pushed off the counter and went over to the window. Snow was starting to come down now and Nik could almost feel the bitter chill. He almost went outside anyway, just to get out of this damn house and away from this whole thing.

He could hear Lev open and close the damn baby book on the counter. Like now was the perfect fucking time to read about babies. When he said as much, Lev said, “You know Eden’s not going to just disappear because Cameron got hurt, right? I’m not a baby expert yet and there’s no reason not to.”

“Well no, Lev, I do know that Eden’s not going to just disappear. I’m not that much of a moron,” he said, taking another drink from his glass. “But please, focus on the currently healthy, sleeping infant instead of the half-dead boyfriend currently bleeding out in our bed. Your priorities are spot on, they are.”

Lev kept looking at him. “What do you want me to do?”

Nik’s chest was so damned tight. “Anything!” Nik yelled. “I want you to do something. I want Cameron to stop being so damn selfish, I want Zareth to use his damned head and I want-” Nik stopped talking and planted his empty glass on the counter and stormed out of the house until he was on the front porch.

Nik doubled over, breathing hard with his hands on his knees. Tears unwillingly streamed down his face while his thoughts were both racing and completely void at the same time. Nik’s body locked up and he choked on his breath at the sudden cold air trapped in his lungs, making it even harder to breathe.

When Nik’s body was finally in line, and Nik felt like he just got the hell beat out of, he let out a sharp breath, combing his fingers in his hair and gathering himself before going back inside, wiping hard at his face. He cut a cold look at the nearest sentry, daring them to just say something. But Cam had them trained well since they didn’t so much as blink at his latest nuclear meltdown.

Nik walked back into the kitchen to see Lev trying to calm down an upset Eden. Zareth was looking distraught and worried about the wriggling demon baby in Lev’s arms, pale face flushed grey from how hard she was screaming. He let out a breath. “She okay?”

Lev nodded. “She’s just not happy to be woken.”

Or she’s just not happy because one of her fathers is bleeding out two rooms away from her bedroom, Nik thought. But guilt still spliced through him. “Give her to me.” When Lev handed her over, Nik lightly bounced her and kissed her head, mumbling, “Esta bien, bebe.”

Tears still rolled down her cheeks, but she did eventually start calming down after a while, small fingers clawing into Nik’s bare chest. Zareth was still staring at them. “Can I help you?” Nik asked him, still rocking her.

“I… no. Sorry, I just-” Zareth seemed at a loss for words. “We’ve been trying for a baby for a few years, that’s all. I didn’t mean anything by it.”

Nik waved him off, but kissed Eden’s cheek again while Lev eventually came over to stroke Eden’s hair and press his cheek against Nik’s. Nik bit down on Lev’s shoulder, mumbling, “You really should take a shower and get that blood off you. Zareth should too.” He looked over at Zareth trying to keep himself busy by staring at the counter. “I’m sure handsome over here won’t mind walking around in a towel while we find him some clean threads.”

Zareth’s head snapped up, his mouth opening to argue, but his eyes rested on Eden and his argument died in his throat. He nodded. “Sure. That’d be fine, thank you.”

Lev nodded a little and then kissed Nik’s cheek, before offering to show Zareth where the bathrooms were. When they both disappeared, Nik settled at the counter, slightly buzzed now, but sober enough, he could take care of Eden. He hummed a lullaby he had learned while pressing his lips to the top of her head, inhaling that pure baby smell.

After a few minutes of quiet, Eden started getting fussy. Nik kissed the top of her head. “Getting hungry, baby?” he asked, getting up from the stool and starting for the fridge to pull out some already cooked hamburger to warm up.

He had her fed and settled again by the time Zareth and Lev both came out- Lev dressed back up in those bear pajama pants and one of Nik’s shirts while Zareth held true to being in just a towel. “Well,” Nik said, bouncing Eden lightly. “At least one good thing came out of today, isn’t that right, Zareth?”

Zareth made a face, before awkwardly folding his arms over his bare chest. “I suppose,” he allowed. “Though, I don’t know how appropriate this is in front of the baby.”

Nik snorted. “I don’t think she really minds.”Eden babbled through the metal spoon in her mouth, waving a hand towards Zareth. Nik smacked a kiss on her cheek. “See? A lady of good taste. She takes after me.”

Zareth rolled his eyes, but kept looking at her. “Can… is it okay if I hold her?”

Nik looked over Eden’s head at Lev for his reaction, but Lev just blinked at Zareth. “...Be careful with her.”

Zareth almost looked downright giddy beneath his stoicism. Nik gently put her in Zareth’s arms, carefully positioning them so he didn’t drop her on her head. Eden didn’t seem to care and just went for the damp long wet hair hanging loose at Zareth’s shoulder with a ferocity that made Nik nearly cackle at the pained look on Zareth’s face when she started yanking. “Hah, how’s that long hair treating you now, soldier boy?”

Lev nudged him. “Be nice.”

“I am being nice,” Nik said, nudging him back.

Eden screeched and tried shoving Zareth’s hair into her mouth, but Zareth just gently pulled it out of her tiny claws and moved it just out of her way. “She’s fine. Demon children are notorious for putting things that don’t belong in their mouths.” He bounced her a little. “Nothing a little training won’t fix eventually.”

“Bold words for someone who doesn’t have any kids,” Nik said, dryly.

Zareth just shrugged. “Had plenty of siblings.”

“What was that like? I never had siblings,” Lev asked.

Both he and Zareth said, “Loud.”

Zareth seemed to look almost sad as he said, “A little crowded. There were seven of us, and I was the oldest. We fought a lot, but we were pretty close for the most part. I was pretty close with my youngest brother. Acyn was… a bit of a mess, but he had a good heart.”

Eden tried clawing at Zareth’s face and when she couldn’t do that, she started getting wiggly and fussy, babbling angrily at him. But her babbling turned into shrill giggles when Zareth blew raspberries on her cheek. Zareth looked vaguely pleased when she started clapping her hands. “Has she started crawling yet? Looks to be about that age.”

Lev nodded. “Yes.”

Zareth had opened his mouth again, but looked to the doorway, where Cameron suddenly stumbled in. Nik was already moving, going to prop him up before Cameron collapsed against the ground again.

“What are you doing up?” Nik demanded. He looked behind them, to see if Sazra was following, but she was sulking back down to her hideyhole. “Cam?”

Cameron waved him off, trying to push Nik away while he went for a stool. “I’m fine. Just. Need a drink.” He blinked up at Zareth blankly. “Make me one. Since you helped yourself to my towels.”

“You need to go to bed,” Lev said.

“I need a drink,” Cameron rasped, sharply. “Zareth. Now.”

Zareth didn’t move, and Nik got in front of Cam’s line of vision. “Okay, maybe you should lay off the booze since you just got pulverized? Get in bed and heal a bit more? Before you upset Eden? You are covered in your own blood, Cam.”

Cameron looked past Nik to Eden, who was staring at Cameron with wide eyes. She did look seconds away from her second nuclear meltdown. When Cameron hesitated, Zareth said, “If you don’t I’m turning in my resignation.”

Cameron didn't even blink as his eyes shifted up to meet Zareth’s. “Excuse me?”

“Cameron, please,” Lev said, softly.

Zareth stared Cameron down. “You’re going to upset your daughter,” he said, in a low voice. “And we both know I am paid extremely well for a reason.”

“Fine,” Cameron bit out. “Expect to feel that in your paycheck.” Cameron got back up to his feet, and would have fallen flat on his face, had Nik not steadied him. He led him back to the bedroom, with Lev on their heel.

“Would you rather we go to Lev’s room?” Nik asked, stopping them in the hallway. “It is, ah, less covered in blood.”

“So am I,” Cameron said, dryly.

Nik rolled his eyes. “Yes, but that could be fixed with a bath. I’m sure your floorboards need ripped out.”

Cameron hesitated, but nodded. “Fine. I’m going to need...”

When Cameron’s voice trailed off, Nik suggested, “Help?”

Cameron nodded tersely.

“Okay,” Nik agreed. “Lev, can you go run some water in the tub? We’ll be there in a second.”

Lev gave a quick, “Okay,” Before starting up ahead.

When Lev was out of ear shot, Nik looked at Cameron. “Cam, what happened?” Nik asked, in a quiet voice. “Please tell me, I want to know who did this to you.”

Cameron stared blankly at him. “Destris. I’m fine, though. He wasn’t going to kill me.”

“Cameron.”

“Well he wasn’t,” Cameron said, flatly. “If he wanted me dead, I would be.”

Nik’s head dropped back and he sighed loudly. “Stars.” He snapped his head up and started back up dragging Cameron down the hallway. “Being in a relationship with you is like living in a hornet’s nest, you know that?”

“Good thing it’s not a relationship then,” Cameron said.

“You kill me,” Nik muttered, toeing the bathroom door open. “Lev can you help the cripple bathe?”

“Yes,” Lev said, before, “Nik, don’t be cruel.”

“Oh, I could be crueler.” Nik said, sitting Cameron down to get the last of his clothes off. “Isn’t that right, Cam?”

Cam, of course, ignored him and looked at Lev. “You don’t have to help me. I’m sure I can manage just fine.”

“I want to,” Lev said. “I’m worried about you.”

Cameron looked vaguely annoyed, but allowed it. “Go keep an eye on Eden,” he told Nik. "Lev, help me.”

Nik was halfway out the door before turning around. “If you need help, come get me.” But then he turned back around and disappeared out the door before Cameron got even more pissy.

--------

Afterwhile, Zareth managed to get his way into Cameron’s study and found the paperwork for the club. It took him a few hours, but he got every last piece done and double checked for errors before going to knock on the bedroom door he was directed to.

“What.”

Cam’s voice was so hoarse and irritable.

“It’s Zareth,” he said, holding the work to his chest. “Can I come in?”

He was quiet for a few seconds before the door opened, Lev standing on the other side to let Zareth in wordlessly. He squeezed past him and stood awkwardly at the end of the bed. “I, um, did the paperwork for you,” Zareth said. “Double checked it and everything. I figured you’d not be… up to doing it for a while.”

Cameron’s face was somehow even more pale in pain as he forced himself into a sitting position to hold out a battered hand wordlessly for the paperwork still in Zareth’s hands.

Cameron’s sharp “Well?” had Zareth leaning over to hand it to him.

“Double check if you want,” he said. “But it’s all right.”

Lev settled down beside Cameron, peeking over Cameron’s shoulder while Cameron double and triple checked his work. When he was finished, he looked up Zareth, handing the paperwork over to Lev wordlessly.

Lev instantly went to put it on the desk before coming back to climb up beside him. Cameron was still looking at Zareth, gaging and studying him. “Thirty percent not including tips should suffice, I think.”

Zareth blinked. “What?”

“You’re trying for an infant with your wife, yes?” Cameron said. “I think a thirty percent raise should suffice.”

“I- what?”

“Did I stutter?” Cameron asked.

“No? I just-”

“Did you fall and hit your head on the way to the bedroom, then? Can you not process words?”

“Cameron,” Lev said, with a sharpness that had Cameron’s lips thinning.

“I didn’t do it for a raise,” Zareth groused. Gods forbid he do something nice for such an emotionally bankrupt demon.

“Are you saying no? I’d have thought you’d want more money since you are so keen on having children.”

“I’m- no. I’m not saying no,” Zareth said, before it was rescinded. “I- Thank you, Cameron. I’ll keep things going at the club until you’re able to get back. I already know how to do everything, and will make sure you have the final count.”

Cameron nodded, pleased. “Good.” Then he added, “Why did you do it?”

“Because I’m a nice person?” Zareth said.

That seemed to amuse Cameron, but he just dismissed him and laid back down in the bed with jerky, pain laced movements.

Zareth went to find Nik and Eden and found them only a few doors down in the nursery. Nik was sprawled out on the floor sitting next to a sitting Eden who was contently chewing on a toy set of keys. Nik looked up at him. “So what’s it this time?”

“Thirty percent,” Zareth grumbled.

“A rich, rich demon,” Nik said. “Not as rich as Cam, but still. You have to be the best paid bartender in, at the very least, Razya.”

“It’s to make up for how often Cameron fucks people in front of me,” Zareth said, drly.

“Okay, last I checked, you fucked me a couple of times.”

“Mm.”

“‘Mm’ indeed. Lev still glued to his side?”

“He is, yes.”

“Cameron still beaten to hell and back?”

“He is.”

“I’m guessing Lev hasn't worn him down,” Nik said.

“Well,” Zareth said, “If I was Cameron I’d probably say the same thing. I fought in that war for a very long time. And I’m more forgiving than he is.”

Nik was quiet for a few seconds before, “Noted. Are you heading out or staying the night?”

“I… can I stay? I want to make sure he sleeps through the night,” he said, despite knowing he would. Cameron Luain was a cockroach.

“Don’t you got a Missus to get back to?”

“I’ll let her know I’m here,” he said. “She’ll understand.

Nik nodded and rolled over onto his back. “Yeah, go ahead. Gotta keep wearing the towel though.”

Zareth rolled his eyes. “No problem.”

Lev came back into the room, looking upset and tired. He gave a small, “He won’t let me heal him, still.”

Nik sighed loudly, still on his back. Eden smacked him for it, too. Nik’s face scrunched up and he said, “Don’t hold your breath, babe. Demons are prideful creatures.” Lev just sighed. “Nothing you can do about it until he gives you the okay.”

----

Lev glanced back at the bed. Cameron and Nik both were asleep. He leaned over, pressing a kiss to Nik’s forehead, and fussing with the covers. If Cameron opened an eye to see what he was doing, Lev pretended he didn’t see it, and instead slipped out of the room. After looking in on Eden as well, Lev padded towards the kitchen. He was hungry. Again.

After making himself a sandwich, he settled on the counter and started flipping through the book he’d left. Twice over he’d read it cover to cover, and now he was perusing at random. It had chapters on everything from pregnancy to toddlers, and Lev knew he should be reading more on six month olds, but that was too close to home, and so instead he opened the book to the beginning and started all over.

The preface reminded him that this information was dated. He knew that. His mother had bought this book when Lev was barely a thought. Almost a hundred and fifty years ago. Though, he had to hope not that much had changed since he was born.

He chewed on his thumbnail, slowly flipping the pages. He knew how conception worked, thank you, and there was no need to remind him how hard it was for angels to conceive. His parents had tried for well over two centuries to have him. The fact that Amara and Reneé were born so close in age was a miracle in and of itself.

Lev’s eyes glazed over as he skimmed over paragraphs. It was all information he’d read before, and he wasn’t sure why he was rereading it all. Front to back, back to front, twice over, and he didn’t need a third. He needed a new book. He needed a clear head and to stop crying at the drop of a hat. A month ago, or was it two, he’d not been able to cry, and now he cried more constantly than he had before he’d stopped.

With a sigh, Lev slid off the counter. He was still hungry, and he was starting to get self conscious about how much he ate. He’d only been half joking when he’d accused Nik of plumping him up. He’d gained weight, plenty of it at this point. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d looked in the mirror and seen softness blinking back, not like this. It was both comforting and frightening.

He couldn’t blame them entirely though. Lev’d had free reign in the kitchen for snacking, and he’d taken advantage. Just as he was now. After some rummaging, Lev pulled out a jar of pickles, and some peanut butter. He snagged the book off the counter, and settled on the floor cross legged.

He didn’t make it two bites in before something crossed his mind. He stared blankly at the book’s pages, as if it’d give him an answer, any answer at all. Slowly, he closed the book. Even slower, he put away the food. All of the sudden he wasn’t hungry anymore.

Not meeting the eyes of any of the sentries, he padded back to the bedroom. Cameron and Nik were still sound asleep, but Lev couldn’t bring himself to join them yet. Instead he slipped into Eden’s room, and settled in the rocking chair. He wrapped his arms around himself, listening to her breathe.

If nothing else, she was perfectly fine. Even if she could pick up on the stress of the adults in the house, she still was content and happy, as babies should be. As they should be.

He closed his eyes, letting out a breath. No. He was still restless in here. Despite that, he sat there for a good hour before he crept back to bed. Cameron’s eyes flashed in the dark, well aware of Lev crawling in bed beside Nik. Lev didn’t say a damn word. Didn’t trust himself to. Instead he snuggled up to Nik, sighed softly when Nik tugged him close, even in sleep, and closed his eyes again.

Sleep was a long time in coming.

tagging: @idreamonpaper @incandescent-creativity @livvywrites @halstudies​ @alittleyellowdinosaur

[burnt-tomato]

“Soba ni ite Hoshii”

Hinata Shouyo x Reader

Introduction: Hinata has seen you as someone special, but couldn’t take the courage to say it out loud. He begged his team to help him out and give him a step up, but anything they adviced didn’t work out like they imagined it would. There was this upcoming school festival for Karasuno High. Will Hinata finally grab the chance to tell you or would it take him much longer to be ready.

Anime: Haikyuu!!

Genre: Fluff

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[“Hey y/n.”

“Mmmm?”

“You never knew what Soba no ite hoshii meant right?”

“Nah. You did tease me about it though.”

“Then I’ll tell you.”

“Will you really?”

“Yes. Y/n… Soba no ite hoshii!” Hinata blurted out loud without hesitation.

“? We’re you saying that to me? Because if it was, I didn’t understand haha. Sorry Hinata.”

“I’ll tell you, y/n… do you-”]

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“Y/N!!” Hinata shouted your name while waving his hands and running towards you. “Thanks again for the meat buns you bought me yesterday. You’re a real lifesaver!”. Yesterday Hinata walked with you because your houses were close. He got really angry and told you he forgot his wallet at home, so you bought him some of his favorite, meat buns.

“Nah dude, don’t mention it! You don’t have to owe me even if I always buy you food after school”. He smiled widely and went to Kageyama, supposedly to discuss about their quick, which just ended with them bickering at each other.

Tanaka walked over to you and got close to your ears and whispered. “Hey y/n, mmmmmm is it just me or you and Hinata auhhhh… have gotten closer?”

“Hm? Well dUh. We walk to school together, we walk home together, we’re in the same grade, we’ve been friends since middle school, and were basically neighbors. Are you stupid?”

“THatS nOt wHat i mEanT- yknow what, nevermind” he said as he walked away to Daichi and spoke to him.

You noticed your phone ringing…

Unread Messages

Y/n where are You? I thought that you agreed to hang out with us after school today.

“Ah. Sorry. I forgot. I’ll be there, so wait for me.”

Are you with Hinata and his volleyball team again? You spend your after school hours there, so hang out with us for a chance.

“Fine fine. I’ll tell them that I have stuff to take care of. But ill only do this today.”

Thanks y/n!!

You looked up from your phone.

“Daichi-san, I’m really sorry but I have to go. I have some outside school things to take care of, but only for today! I’ll make sure to come tomorrow.”

“Oh y/n. Of course you can!”

“K guys! I’ll head out now.” You said as you waves your hand above your head and rushed out.

[♤: Even if y/n is gone, the story continues on even without her, and in this part the perspective is 3rd person to narrate everyone’s perspective]

The end of practice drew closer, and the boys went to their clubroom to change.

“Crap. Exams are drawing near, and after that, a 3-day festival, and after are the finals.” Yamaguchi said.

“Yeah…wait. E-exams? C r a p.” Hinata said

“Kshh, oooooh that’s gonna hurt.” Suga said

“N-nevermind! I’ll just ask y/n for help! She’s really smart and good in teaching, and she’s also really nice.” Hinata said

“Yeah. If you pass the exam period, you can still enjoy the festival.” Daichi said

“Hey Hinata. Since yknow, y/n has helped you alot till now, especially during exams right? So don’t you like, wanna repay her back somehow?” Ennoshita said

“Yeah, like inviting her to the festival and yknow, finally tell her how you feel, or something?” Tanaka said teasingly

Hinata’s cheeks grew bright red and instantly looked away. “Wha-? W-what are you s-saying?” He stuttered

“Oh c'mon Hinata, it’s hella obvious that you both like eachother. Anyone could tell, even the dumbest person we know can.” Suga said

“N-no I don’t! Besides, we’ve been friends for so long, she’s seen how stupid I am, so obviously she’ll never like me. I can’t even gather up the courage to tell her, heck, I don’t even know how to set the right time to let her know!” Hinata said

“Mmmmmm…. then.. we’ll help you out! How ‘bout asking her to teach you? So if you confess by then, you both would have fUn together at the festival. Or at least hint it, yknow?” Nishinoya said

“During a study session? Noya that’s like the worst time to tell someone your feelings. This is why Kiyoko doe- u r g h-” Noya screams at the top of his lungs to overlap what Suga was saying

“Mmmmm… I’m not sure about this. I can barely stay focus when with her.. maybe we- I shouldn’t.”

“Dumbass. If you won’t do it now, when will you? You’re just gonna sit there till she finds someone else? If you really don’t want to lose her, then at least make your move now. One day you’ll regret not telling her if you don’t, so get moving and let us- I mean tHEm help you.” Kageyama said wow some actually good advice from kags. How rare.

“Wow. Who knew? Kageyama can actually say stuff that are helpful?”

“K r00d.” Kageyama snarled

“Heh. Fine. Since you’re all willing to help, I guess the least I can do is set your plans to work.” Hinata said.

“Ok. Since we’ve been planning for this day since the time you introduced y/n to us, we have a plan in mind already. Care to say it Suga?” Daichi said

“Ok. Y/n sucks at Japanese right? So here’s what you have to do….. did you get that?” Suga asked

“Mmmm… yeah. Kinda” Hinata said

They all called it a day and went straight home.

You were about to sleep when you heard your phone buzz, revealing a message.

Ah. Y/n. Sorry for messaging you this late

“Mmm Hinata? No no it’s Fine! What’s up?”

Well I’m pretty sure you have like alot to do and I’m just being a bother because I always ask you about this buuuuttttt

“Mmmmmm it’s about the exams isn’t it? It’s fine! I’ll help you study, and you can even bring Kageyama too, maybe Noya-san and Tanaka-san too.”

Haha yeah. I forgot that your knowledge is actually advanced, so you’re capable of teaching upperclassmen.

Hinata told Tanaka and Nishinoya, as well as Kageyama and Yamaguchi what y/n told him. This boosted the chances of their plan and to offer Hinata support.

3 days till exams, 4 days till the festival, and 7 days till Finals. Goal, to carry out the plan before Finals comes.

Hinata and the others were able to come to your class during breaks and free periods and study hours.

“So y/n, you sucked at Japanese literature, right? Even if you speak Japanese, it’s hard for you to actually write what certain words say.” Kageyama asked

“Ah, yes that’s true lol. But isn’t that the subject that Hinata’s good at? That’s why I asked him to teach me that” you said

As time went by, you all continued to share learning and understandings, plus you were able to help even the second years alot.

“Ah, Hinata! What does Soba ni Ite Hoshii mean?”

“Mmmmm… that means-oW” Hinata said, surprised. Tanaka gave him a soft kick on the leg and shot him a look. “Are you stupid Hi- ah- y/n? Everyone knows that!” Tanaka exclaimed.

You pouted. You were confused as to why they didn’t tell you what it meant but teased you instead. But that didn’t bother You, you wanted to focus on studying and to pass your exams to be able to enjoy the festival with your friends.

2 days till exams, 3 days till the festival, and 6 days till Finals. Goal, to carry out the plan before Finals comes.

“Y/n!!!! How tf do you do that Pythagorean theorem nonsense whatever that shit is again??”

“Oh! Tanaka-san! I’ll teach you, you do this and that then you do that” (♤: ok like I can’t describe how this theorem stuff works so I ain’t using my time to Google it and copy paste it here lmao)

“Psstt! Shou, what’s Soba ni ite Hoshii meaannnnn??” You asked. “Hmmmmm… I’ll tell you if you buy me 10 meat buns for the entire year.” He said. “GeEz fInE u d0nT hAvE t0 tElL mE” Damn Shou be bullyin you nowadays.

“I’ll tell you after exams” he said as he half smiled at you. “0r mAyBe n0t”. Damn Shou be savage.

Tomorrow are the exams, 2 days till the festival, and 5 days till Finals. Goal, to carry out the plan before Finals comes.

“Hey y/n, after school today, want to stop by Ukai-san’s shop and buy some meat buns?”. “Shou we always stop by there and I’m the one paying for our food.”

“Ok guys. Tomorrow are the exams, so show me how much you’ve learned from me by passing the exams so we can enjoy our 3-day festival to rest up before finals”

After studying together with the others, you finally wrapped up and separated ways, with you stopping by the shop to buy some snacks then walking home with Hinata.

Today are exams, tomorrow is the festival, and 4 days till Finals. Goal, to carry out the plan before Finals comes.

Time seemed slow. The entire class remained quiet, but deep inside, everyone was panicking. Today is the day of exams. Today is the day that’ll determine who gets to enjoy the festival and who won’t. It was obvious in the atmosphere surrounding the school that no one dared to make a single sound.

“Time’s up class, pass em in. The results will come out by the end of the day, but for now, turn to page 345 of your Mathematics textbooks and answer the 50-item Chapter Review there.” The teacher said. You all watched the teacher’s every step as she exits the classroom. Once she closes the door, everyone breathed out a huge sigh of relief. You could hear everyone talking to one another, transferring seats, and talking about how hard the test was and what challenged them the most, but all you thought was I wonder how Shou and the others did… I hope they pass so that we can all enjoy the festival together.

Hours and hours passed by. You couldn’t take it. You were minutes away from hearing about the results, and everyone was scared shitless. Everyone was restless, and you were sure that the only thing in everyone’s minds was I hope i pass, even if I get the exact passing grade, just let me pass.

The teacher came in, carrying cards that probably contains your grades and how well you did. No one dared to breathe a single sound. Everyone barely moved. Everyone seemed to be stuck on their chairs, all eyes are focused unto the teacher’s hands.

“Well start with the students at the back row, once I call your surname, stand up and retrieve your grading cards. We’ll start with… Nichiiyama…”

Nichiiyama stood up, his movements were stiff and his hands were shaking as he held his card, and quietly made his way to his chair. The teacher continued calling students’ names, until she called yours. You stood up stiffly, making your way to the front desk and held up your hands and- “Good work y/n.. You scored the top grades in the class. Continue your good work, alright?” The teacher whispered into your ear and patted your back. As you walked back, you opened your card and saw that your grades were either 1 or 2 in every subject. You sighed when a huge wave of relief came over you. The only thing you’re worried about now is how Hinata and the others did.

“Aaanddd that’s all of You. Those who didn’t make it, you’ll be spending your 3-day break in Supplementary classes to retake your tests and pass, but those who passed, you’re free to enjoy the festival as you wish. That’s all for today, and let’s see eachother next week.” The teacher bowed and made their way to the door. Everyone started to pack up, chatting with eachother about how they did, or who passed. “Hey y/n, did You pass?” Your friend asked. “Yeah I did, how about you?”. “Man, I barElY made it, yknow? My scores were a solid 42 and around 40s, and my grades were Like, 3 and 3.5! I was lucky to make the 40-grade mark. Btw y/n, do you want to hang out after school today?”. “Ah… I’m not sure… I have to stop by the club today, but I’ll catch up with you.”

You rushed out of the classroom and to the gym. You arrived to the clubroom with the 3rd years inside already, and Ennoshita, Kinoshita, and Narita. “Oh hey y/n, you’re here early. Your students aren’t here yet, but they should be arriving soon” Narita said. You waited and waited for them while playing animal crossing on your phone.

“Y/n!! Y/n!! We passed! We fuckin passed! How in the world did I passs??”. Tanaka said running towards the room, teary- eyed. “Idiot! It’s all because y/n helped us!” Noya said, smacking Tanaka’s back. “Yeah, it’s all thanks to you, y/n. We’ll be able to enjoy the festival because of your work. Even I passed all of the exams.” Kageyama then bowed. “Ah- no you don’t need to thank me! I didn’t do much, you should thank yourselves, for working hard to pass! All I did was help you get there.” You said. You turned to look for Hinata and hear about his results. “Heh. Yeah. Thanks so much y/n, we passed because of your help. So uh… because of your help and all uhm.. I wanted to somehow repay you and stuff..” Everyone turned their heads to Hinata and you, somehow expecting something or an answer. “What is it Shou?” You asked. “Well uh.. I was thinking that since you helped all of us and personally you help me alot everyday I was wondering if you wanted to come to the festival with me.. I mean all of us ofcourse!” He said shyly, his cheeks heating up a bit and fiddling with his fingers. Everyone looked like they were gonna laugh and some were smiling widely. “Ofcourse I’ll go! I was planning to anyways, but I gotta go right now since my friends and I are going out for a bit, so I’ll meet you all by the entrance tomorrow! See ya.” You said as you rushed out of the room and met up with your friends. As you left, Hinata looked like he was about to faint and exploding.

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Geh. I’m too early.. we all agreed to meet up by 3pm.. and look at this, it’s only 1:30pm and I’m already here. Guess I should walk around for now till they come-

“Y/n?” You were surprised to see the 3rd years standing by the entrance, along with the 2nd years and the 1st years, except one person..

“Why isn’t Hinata with you, y/n? Aren’t you 2 neighbors?” Ennoshita asked. “Mmmm, his mom said he might get there late and told me to get along, so I decided to wait for him here.” You told them.

“Crap.. If Hinata doesn’t show up, what’s the point of doing all this?” Tanaka whispered to Suga. “Don’t say that, we just have to do as we planned. I’ll call Hinata to check up on him.” Suga whispered. “I’ll go over there for a while to call someone, k?” Suga walked over by the trees and took out his phone and dialed Hinata’s number.

“Hinata, where are you?”

Suga-san? Oh sorry, I didn’t feel well when I woke up… My mom said that I should rest, I’m really sorry… you all planned for this day, but I blew it, just because of a godDAMN fever-

“Nono it’s fine Hinata. Don’t apologize, I understand, these stuff happen unexpectedly, but it’s not like you lost your chance, alright? Remember, this plan is full proof and we have 3 days of the festival! Although I’m not sure if you can heal up by Then, but we’ll have to hope for the best. Just, rest up right now ok? So you can catch up.”

Alright Suga-san. Bye.

Suga puts down his phone and walks over to where the others are. “Well, Hinata wouldn’t make it today… he’s gotten a fever. But he said that he’ll try his best to make it tomorrow though! So let’s enjoy this day and hope that he feels better, especially with Finals coming up soon.”

Damnit Shou. You’re the one who invited me, then you’re the one who wouldn’t make it.. sigh.. I’ll just drop by your house later I guess… I do hope that he’ll feel better soon, I wanted to tell him something and decided that the festival would be nice…

Despite Hinata’s absence, you all tried to enjoy the festival. Checking out every stall, entering games and winning them, and eating with the team. You decided to bring Hinata a stuffed crow you won at one of the shooting games, and to stop by a convenience store to buy him some food.

“Alright guys, we’ll all meet by here tomorrow at the same time, if you can. But we’ll all be there at the last day of this festival, okay? On the 3rd day there’ll be a fireworks showcasing, and i think that’ll be fun and calming so all should be present by Then, but for now, all of you go home and rest.” Daichi said. Everyone began to separate ways, including you. You walked lazily, not used to walking at night alone. Looking up at the sky, you remembered how you and your friends always went out stargazing during cold winter nights like this. Even if you were wearing a yukata that travelled along your feet, you could still feel the cold air breezing through. After stopping by the store to buy some food, you started walking up the mountain road towards home. You were cold and freezing. You were lonely.

“Walking home at nights like this without anyone to talk to sure is lonely.” You let out a little chuckle afterwards.

“It sure is. Why didn’t you call me that you were heading home? I could’ve walked with you.” You jolted. You were sure that you were alone while Walking, but as you faced infront of you, you saw Hinata in his pajamas, holding a jacket. “Here. You must be freezing.. Sugawara told me that you all went home, so I tried to get out to bring you home, but Natsu insisted me to stay. I had to give her one of those ‘Play with Sister for 1 hour Coupon’ just so I can leave lol.. ah! You must be freezing, here, wear this.” He said as he put on the jacket on you. You felt safe and warm, and complete with him. You both shared chars and laughs as you walked, which reminded you from when you were middle schoolers.

The next day you called Hinata’s house number, but his mom was the one who picked up, saying that he wouldn’t be able to come again, but he was feeling a little bit better. You thanked her and dropped the phone. He’s still not healed up yet, huh? What should I do for today? If I go to the festival, it would be boring because we already experienced all of it yesterday, and plus Hinata wouldn’t even be able to come with us..

Since you weren’t feeling like doing anything productive today, you just slept till afternoon.

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“Shit-! I slepT an entire day? Is it seriously the last day of the festival?? I only planned to sleep till afternoon, so how is it the next day already?? Geh, fuck that. I should just get changed to meet up with the others. Especially that today is when all of us should be present..” either way, you got up and got dressed. After getting ready, you found yourself standing infront of Hinata’s doorstep. I probably shouldn’t disturb him, he might still be resting. You decided to go on alone.

You met up with the others and surprisingly-

“Hey y/n..”. You saw Hinata standing infront if everyone. “Sorry I didn’t tell you that I decided to go on ahead. I wanted to sorta… surprise you I guess…haha” Hinata said with a short laugh. “It took awhile, but when he called up on me, he said that he was feeling a bit better, although he still has a bit if his fever.” Yamaguchi said

You were really happy that you’re able to spend the last day of the festival with him especially so that you could finally tell him.

You spent the entire day playing games, eating in every stall, and watching the band’s perform. You all had an amazing time together. Suga and Daichi trying to contain Tanaka and Noya, Ennoshita, Kinoshita and Narita all sitting in a bench calmly, Tsukki and Yams playing with the fish thing, yknow… the one ripoff game where you catch fish using a paper on a handle thing but the fish wouldn’t survive an entire month, Asahi and Kiyoko looking at souvenir shops, while you and Hinata, long with Kageyama, go around eating everywhere.

Finally, 8pm came around. The fireworks were said to start at 8:30, so you all decided to get a spot to put a tent on so you could all wait.

Hinata was with Tanaka, Noya, Kageyama, and Suga. “C'mon Hinata, now is nOt the time for you to back out! This is finally the moment you can tell her!” Suga said. “Yeah! Shouyo, this is now or never, if you don’t do it now, then when will You? Noya asked. “You don’t want to lose y/n right? Then take it now.” Kageyama said.

Hinata wasn’t sure. All he could thing was what if she doesn’t feel the same? If I told her and turns out it isn’t mutual… wouldn’t that make our friendship awkward? What if confessing just break the history we had? What if-

“I’m sorry guys… I’m… just not sure I can. What if she doesn’t feel the same? Then that would just ruin everything… maybe we should give this more thought…” Hinata sighed. “Yeah But.. Hinata what if-”. Suga was cut off by Hinata standing up. He smiled then said “Its alright… if she does find someone… then I’ll support her whole- heartedly.”

He stood up and walked over by the trees. “Hinata wait-”

He sighed. “Heh. What was I thinking? Actually hoping that if I confess, it would work out? She probably doesn’t like me at all honestly..”

20 minutes passed by. No one could find where Hinata went. “Suga! Dis you check any of the stalls?” “Yes we did! But he wasn t there! I don’t think he’s at the festival anymore..” “maybe he went home already?”

You helped everyone search for him. What was he thinking? Wandering off like that out of nowhere.. Dammit Shou! Where are You? You saw a trail of footsteps towards the forest. You thought that just maybe, he might have went there..

You walked through… and as soon as you saw light, you saw..

“Shou?” You asked quietly. He froze for a minute. When he turned around to face You, you noticed that he had tears running down his face.

“H-hey Shou… why are you- are you alright?” You asked. You walked towards him slowly

“Y/n… I uh.. I’m sorry for disappearing so suddenly.. I didn’t mean to- i-” he stops. “I wasnt-” he pauses. He quickly wipes his tears and plaster a huge smile on his face

You instantly run up to him, and throw you arms around him, hugging him tightly. “Idiot. At least tell me if you’re going to disappear like that..” You release.

“Haha.. yeah.. sorry about that..”

Crap.. is it almost 8:30? We better get back to the others before we miss the firewo-

Just as you were tugging his shirt, signaling that you both go back, he grips your arm.

“Maybe we should stay. The view is nice out here.” He says with a soft voice

“Yeah.. but what about the others?” You asked. “They’ll be fine.. since you haven’t come back yet it’s obvious that you’ve found me already.” He says. You both stood next to eachother waiting for the fireworks. Hinata stood silently looking at the sky with a wide smile on his face.

“Its been a while since we went stargazing..” he said. “Ah. Haha yes it has..” You said. There was a moment of silence and awkwardness. You wanted to break this unstoppable silence covering the two of you-

“Hey y/n.. have I ever told you what Soba ni Ite Hoshii meant?”

“Mmmmm… nah. You all teased me about not knowing it though..”

“Then I’ll tell You, right now..”

He takes a deep breath then.. “Y/n! Soba ni Ite Hoshii-!” He takes a few steps back, trying to process what he has said without thinking.

“What? A sorry Shou… I didn’t really know what it means lol… Maybe if you can tell me in English?” You laugh nervously.

“Fine.. y/n.. I-”

You could hear the fireworks blasting off with your left ear. You both stood firmly from where you where standing. The fireworks were loud, loud enough to overlap what he meant. But You heard him loud and clear. What he said caused your heart to skip a beat. You couldn’t process properly what you had heard. You thought that you were somewhat dreaming.

You both stood in silence, both yours and Hinata’s faces were red. You were speechless.

“Shou.. i-”. “I get it y/n.. it’s not the same huh? Maybe we should just stay as friends.. or if that’s too awkward for you-” he pauses. He turns back, waving his hand to signal you that you both should go back.

But I haven’t given him my answer yet…

You grip his arm, jerking him towards you. “Shou please listen for a while..”

You told him everything you’ve hidden since God knows when. All you could think was this is it. This is now or never. There’s no backing out now. If i don’t tell him now, when will I? I don’t want to lose him. You were speaking in a hushed tone, your face heating up, your heartbeat growing faster and faster, but you knew that you shouldn’t stop. You didn’t.

After you told him, you tried to avoid eye contact. He pulls you closely, your faces drawing nearer eachother. You felt his hands tightly behind you back, yours on his. His face resting in your shoulder, beside your face.

“Does this mean we-”

“Dammit Shou, don’t make it more awkward than it is already” you laughed.

“Hahaha yeah… but we should really go back to the others now y/n..” He said. “I guess we should lol.” You hold his hand tightly as you both walked towards your team.

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“Congrats on your win at the Finals, Shou.” You giggled as you both walked home. “Thanks y/n, but I wouldn’t have done my best without you watching us.” He says. “Damn, since when have you been romantic?”. “Shut up.” Hinata says looking away.

“Hey y/n… stay with me always, will You?”

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The cringe is unbearable in this one lol. Sorry for the late post and for being wAy t00 inactive lmao. It took me some time to decide what I’m doing first but I finally finished this lol.

Feel free to send in requests for hcs, scenarios and oneshots!

-♤

[queenieships]

Questions 1-14 for the most recent one your reblogged!

Thank you for asking! Sorry it took a while lmao I got super lazy and distracted with it. Gonna put some of it under a readmore because it got particularly long!

1. When did youstart self shipping and why?

I mean I officiallystarted this blog I think… middle of last year? I can’t quiteremember the date off the top of my head but it’s been a while.However, I’ve been selfshipping for a very long time, justmentally! I kind of did that whole “Creating Ocs to ship withcharacters I liked and oh no those Ocs definitely aren’t based onme at all aha nope…”

2. How long have youbeen self shipping?

I think I’ve beenself shipping from a very young age! I remember being in primaryschool and being absolutely in love with Tasuki from Fushigi Yuugiand Axel from Kingdom Hearts (had a thing for red heads and fireapparently?) I genuinely must’ve been as young as 8, give or take ayear or two, so I’ve been self shipping and self inserting most ofmy life! 

3. Why do you selfship now?

I mean… it’sfun! And I mean, I fall in love with fictional characters withouteven meaning to. I just become very attached to them to the point Ican’t help but imagine myself with them! It’s also been a thingI’ve done for a very long time, a hobby, a habit, a copingmechanism – as a very creative but also very lonely child I thinkit was a huge way for me to feel like I was getting GOOD attentionfor once. I guess that’s kind of extended to adulthood. In ways aswell it helps me deal with some unhealthy situations I’ve had inthe past and it’s a way for me to explore and take interest intoxic and unhealthy ships in a safe and fictional environment. It’shelped me a lot improving with my art and honestly I officiallyjoined the self ship community because I was very lonely and had…NO FRIENDS.

4. Which of yourself insert characters is the most developed?

Probably myborderlands insert or my Newsies insert! I haven’t been toomassively focused on any other ship to develop my insert in thatuniverse very much and SOME of the universes I self insert in arequite difficult and elaborate when it comes to making characters forit (like in HxH)

5. Are your selfinsert characters 100% you or are they an exaggerated version ofyourself/leaning toward an OC?

I think it dependson the universe. Though I would say they’re exaggerated examples ofmyself, ideal versions or particularly troubled versions – All ofmy self insert characters look like me and have the same name and toa degree share my interests and talents – though I’ve also giventhem talents that I admire and really wish I had (such as singing,baking and sewing.)

6. If your selfinserts are closer to OCs what are some similarities they have withyou? What are some differences?

Lmao whoops guess Ikind of explained this in the one above? I guess something I like todo is depending on the universe I self ship in, I kind of pick a partof my personality that is a focus of that character. (For example, myNewsies insert is mostly centred around my social beliefs, mydepression and toxic relationship with my family and to a degree myfeeling of superiority. I’m actually very working class but you’llnotice most of my inserts are either very well off OR from thenicest, cleanest place in that universe they can be from – mynewsies insert is from a very wealthy family and my borderlandsinsert is from Helios.)

7. Do you have a‘type’ when it comes to f/os?

Yes but my type haschanged and shifted over time. There are definitely things I likethat kind of resonate throughout all of my F/Os. For example, almostall of my F/Os are confident to a fault. Most of them are also verymasculine, with a few exceptions. A character type I LOVE is therough delinquent with a heart of gold! (Seen in characters likeMondo, Metal Bat and Knuckle.) I also like perverted characters orones that show a lot of interest in women during the show/gamethey’re in (Examples being Scooter, Lance and Leorio.) I also seemto like people who have manual labour jobs or jobs that require themto be quite strong and get quite dirty and occassionaly kinda bruisedup (Examples being Scooter, Metal Bat, Scout, Hunk and Ellis who isnot yet on my F/O list but will be soon! A character I used to selfship with is Little Mac because I loved the idea of seeing him allsweaty and bruised up after a figh aha,,,)

8. Your top 3 OTPsamong your own selfships?

1. Me and Scooter!He is the problematic love of my life.

2. Me and Davey –although my focus has shifted dramatically from Davey to Scooter Istill definitely love this boy a lot

3. THIS IS SUCH ADIFFICULT PICK because honestly Scooter and Davey are and almostalways will be my top 2 BUT– my level of interest in my other F/Osshifts around so much? I’m even considering adding new F/Os thatI’ve become interested in recently, like… Mondo and Scout are thecharacters on the list I’ve shipped with for the longest but… Ithink maybe Leorio? I’ve always thought of Leorio and I as a reallygood couple, we’re so physically different and our personalitiesare such a good mix of getting along and clashing and I just!! idk Ithink number 3 is Leorio!!

9. Your top 5 OTPsamong others in the community?

@smoochesforseven and everyone she ships with. I love Moon so much and all of her shipsare wonderful though there is a soft spot for her and Newt!!

@better-than-nothin-kay and Rhys! We’ve spoken so much about borderlands and about her shipand honestly I love the female bodyguard dynamic it’s really cuteand they would physically look so good together!

@millizines andEarnest – I think this is like, the most undisputed OTP in thecommunity. I have never seen someone be so dedicated to their F/O andthey’re so genuinely in love with one another and have such aunique relationship!!

@momomochaccino andSandy (and spongebob!) – Seeing Momo so happy recently has beenamazing and witnessing what a positive impact the spongebob musicaland show has been for her is amazing!!

@peachie-doodles andLeonardo! Honestly seeing TMNT stuff on my dash makes me SO HAPPY andLeonardo has always been the one turtle I never really felt aconnection with BUT seeing someone so in love with him andappreciating him makes me really happy and makes me appreciate himmore as well! (also after speaking with her I realised that, althoughRaphael usually draws my attention because he’s big n buff andrough and tough but a total softy which FITS MY TYPE — Mikey isactually… my fucking boy?? I went around ready some fics andwatching some clips and like, damn. I really love Michaelangelo nowlmao, considering adding him as an F/O!!)

10. Has a roleplayblog for one of your f/os every interacted with you?

Lmao no. Honestly Iwould sob if that ever happened to me and I’ve seen other peoplegetting RP anons regularly in their asks and honestly I… reallywant it aha? I used to RP self ship stuff with a friend, where Iwould write as myself and the character she shipped with, and shewould play herself and the character I shipped with and!! it was!!great!! I would die to find something like that again.

11. Are you anartist or a writer in the community? Or do you do something elseentirely?

Um, both I guess! Iby no means think I’m a good artist but self shipping has reallyhelped me improve in a lot of areas. I highkey hate my style and atsome point I want to dedicate some time into developing it intosomething I can actually enjoy looking at. As for my writing, I’vealways been a talented writer – especially a few years ago. I waswriting frequently and everything I wrote was lowkey incredible.Nowadays, my writing is so few and far between and I am so stronglyout of practice it hurts and I feel almost embarrassed readingthrough any new fic I write. I’m hoping with time I can build myskills and confidence back up again!

12. Name a few ofyour favorite things about self shipping.

Honestly, myfavourite thing about self shipping is that I can feel like I havecompany regardless of how alone I actually am. Countless days spentby myself in my room and during lunchtimes back when I was at schoolcould be spent daydreaming about being loved and having adventureswith characters I enjoy! I always daydream a lot before I fallasleep, usually about cuddling up and spending the evening with oneof my F/Os before I fall alseep. Honestly without selfshipping Idon’t know what I’d do with my time. It’s such a huge thingthat fills up my day to day life and makes me happy, I genuinelydon’t think I’d still be here without it. 

13. Talk about apositive experience you’ve had with the community.

Honestly this iskind of hard for me lmao? I wouldn’t say I’ve had many hugelypositive or many hugely negative experiences overall. There arepeople I’ve found I get along with, there are some people that rubme the wrong way, there are some people I just haven’t spoken to! Ihaven’t really received any hate apart from someone being a dickabout my aesthetic commissions but I don’t really receive theattention I would like to either (is that bratty and selfish?Probably! But at least I’m honest about it lmao.) 

14. Finally, talkabout a few of your favorite self shippers!! (Honestly, talk about asmany as you would like!)

I don’t reallylike doing this because I’m afraid I’ll miss someone off andthey’ll feel sad about it or something BUT HERE’S A LIST OF PEEPSI SPEAK TO OFTEN AND CARE ABOUT AND TREASURE (note just becauseyou’re not on this list it doesn’t mean I don’t like you ordon’t enjoy your content! Just means this people I am particularlyclose with.)

@smoochesforseven

@better-than-nothin-kay

@millizines

@ckselfinsert

@limey-blue-arty-do

@momomochaccino

[shuakkinda-blog]

Soonyoung crushing on you !! // scenario

A bullet-point scenario highlighting our bright star, Soonyoung/Hoshi !!

Send requests for scenarios and reactions on my page if you wish :)

- special shout out to our hosh rn bc this poor boy is sick and he could use all the healing time he can get (stay healthy and rest, love <333)

- this sweetie is honestly one of the most hard working people e v e r

- he pushes himself so much

- and we know that he’s tough on the members when practicing but I’m sure that’s only because:

- 1. he knows the potential of his friends

- 2. he cares about the future of svt

- Soonyoung is just so caring to the point that it hurts him sometimes???

- I’m glad he’s resting because we all know he needs it, as do the rest of the members (especially with this crazy tour schedule they’re in the middle of)

- so really, I honor Soonyoung for everything he does, and he deserves only the best out of his career ;u;

- and with this I’m sure he’d only want to be the best version of himself for the girl he likes as well

- his determination in furthering his career would be the same when it comes to pursuing his crush

- with that said, let’s get right into the scenario !!!

- as an intern at pledis entertainment, you find yourself becoming close friends to 3 specific members of a particular svt unit:

- Channie, Savhao, and Junnie ! 

- you get to know these three performance unit boys individually, but you never get to hang out with them altogether

- so one day, your little friends tell you that it’s about time all four of you meet up once and for all

- but because of your crazy schedules, there’s really no other time to do this besides the performance team practice time

- at first you think, “hey it’d be kind of cool to see them choreographing n practicing n whatnot!”

- thing is

- there’s one member you haven’t exactly bonded with/talked to like you did with the rest of the performance team:

- Kwon Soonyoung

- thinking it would be awkward for the team leader to see you hanging out with his team, you often pushed off the idea of visiting their practices

- no matter how many times the three boys begged you to come

- you just couldn’t say yes

- you’d feel bad but you’d try to convince them that it’s for the best

- and besides, the practice is meant for them to practice, not to chat around with some intern (not like they would mind tho lol)

- imagine pouty chanhaojun @ you bc iSN’T IT JUST THE MOST ADORABLE THING???

- ANYWAYS, after much thinking, the three guys figure that there’s really no way they’d be able to hang out with you as a group unless they invite you over to practice

- so they get s n e a k y

- kind of

- okay not really

- during one of your shifts, Chan texts you:

- “y/n!! are you free right now?”

- “yeah, what’s up?”

- “can you come down to the practice room rn?”

- “you guys aren’t having practice right now, right?”

- “*suspicious eyes emojis*”

- “Chan, how many times do I have to tell you that I don’t want to intrUDE??” “I’m sorry, but I won’t go if you guys are busy.”

- “WAIT LISTEN LISTEN” “we actually need someone to give their opinion on this part of the choreography we’re coming up with... and we were wondering if you could take a look?”

- “uhhhhh... don’t yall have a creatives director... and an assistant choreographer LMAO”

- “yes yes but we want to know what girls like you would think of it you know :(”

- “sigh”

- “come on, just do us a favor” “and doing us this favor means you’re technically not intruding :3″

- “... fine.”

- “NDNFBLSJADFHBJ YAY OMG” “HURRY HURRY”

- so you head to the practice room, and as soon as you walk in:

- “Y/N-IE~” the boys greet you in excitement

- well except Soonyoung but

- he gives you a smile and a curt bow at least

- you give him a bow and a formal greeting as well, but that’s just about as much interaction you’ll have with him

- at first :3

- your three friends honestly just wanted you to be with them, and they finally found an excuse to bring you over to practice

- but you proved to be more helpful during their practice than they had all expected

- you gave pretty good constructive criticism on some of the dance moves and even gave a few suggestions for formations

- and your little trio LOVED IT

- but you know who appreciated your help the most?

- OFC IT’S HOSHI

- it was very nice to have another person give their opinion on the team’s choreography

- and it’s not just another professional choreographer or director doing it either

- it’s a normal person (I mean this in a good way :)

- and he thinks you’ve got a good eye for things that even the pros couldn’t catch themselves

- Soonyoung also realized how much nicer/less stressed he was when you were there helping out

- so all in all, he was really glad you came

- in fact:

- “hey, Jun, Minghao, Chan,” Soonyoung calls the rest of the team as they convene for practice the day after your visit

- the three boys turn to him

- “do you guys think... we could have y/n down here again? You know, just to help out again?” the leader looks down and paces shyly back and forth, but his face is blank

- “WAIT ARE YOU SERIOUS?” Jun says as his eyes widen in disbelief

- “yeah, of course,” Soonyoung is trying to keep his cool composure

- “YES YES WE’LL CALL HER RIGHT NOW !!”

- so they call you up to invite you once again, and since your three friends had expressed their gratitude for your help after practice yesterday, you agree to go

- you arrive at the practice room and are greeted warmly not only by your little trio

- but also by Soonyoung, who flashes a wider smile than the day before

- and it goes like this for almost every performance team practice you can attend from then on

- over time, Soonyoung would start to notice that you’re not the average, serious intern who’s just doing her job (and a little extra for their team)

- there’s a reason why his fellow team members have become so close to you

- they’re all so fond of your positive nature, understanding, honesty, and ofc your fun personality

- and these things are what draw Soonyoung to you

- if he’s being honest, he’d say he’s been attracted to you since he first saw you walking around the company building

- but your whole personality confirmed how much he was beginning to really like you

- YALL KNOW IT’S TIME TO DISCUSS SOONYOUNG’S CRUSHING HABITS:

- he’s honestly not like the rest of the members when it comes to crushing

- he’s kind of a mix of flirty and shy but you won’t be able to tell when he’s gonna be which???

- it can be confusing tbh

- like if you give him a compliment on some solo dance he made for himself, he could either go:

- 1. “oh reAlly??” *smirk* “was it... attractive? ;)”

- 2. “oh... really?” *blushes* “thank you~” *smiles at floor*

- but I’d say he’d be pretty shy 70% of the time at the start, and then he’d slowly get more flirty as you guys become closer friends

- speaking of being close friends, Soonyoung would also put so much effort into becoming your best friend

- because he wants to confess to you knowing that you’re close to him

- so even if you reject him, he knows there’s a chance that you guys can still be friends at least

- the last thing he wants to do is lose you altogether :(

- ALSO, ONE SUPER DUPER BIG THING that Soonyoung would do with his crush is force her to dance with him

- yeaH that’s right, get your dancing shoes on bc this boy will beg and beg until you agree to dance something with him

- even if you can’t dance, he’ll still really want you to do it

- it’s just a way for him to get skinship moments with you tbh slick shit hosh, real slick

- he’ll teach you the basics first and then progress into harder and more partner-based choreos ;);)

- so you’ll be slowly building up a whole dance routine collection with your bestie !! how cute :’)

- when he’s on flirt mode, Soonyoung is a huge tease we all know this

- the cute things he’ll do to get you flustered during your dance routines would either make you laugh or make you super weak omg

- he wouldn’t hesitate to take any opportunity to suddenly pull you close while dancing, and he’ll probably charm you with a smile while he’s at it

- and as he gets used to meeting up with you to dance,

- Soonyoung would want to spend time with you A LOT MORE OFTEN

- but only with you

- so oftentimes, after performance team practice, the other three dancers would hang out for a little bit in the practice room

- but Soonyoung would be itching to hang out with you and work on your dance routine alone in the room

- so he’d be awkwardly standing to the side as the trio plays around before he musters enough courage to say:

- “uh, hey guys,” he’d clear his throat. “I kinda- I mean, y/n and I- we want to... you know...”

- “oH, do whAt?” Jun wiggles his eyebrows. Chan and Minghao laugh along

-  “HEY WE’RE JUST GONNA HANG OUT OURSELVES OKAY?”

- “Soonyoung’s making me do a dance with him again,” you’d explain

- “WAIT YOU GUYS DANCE TOGETHER???”

- “Wtf Soonyoung, you didn’t tell them?” you say

- “hey hey, you didn’t tell them either,” Soonyoung would laugh nervously

- and when the three boys finally get kicked out by Hoshi, the trio would probably tell the rest of the members about this out of saltiness lma0

- a few members would start to interrogate him about his crush, and he’d probably deny it every damn time it’s so obvious you ain’t fooling anyone buddy

- but when Soonyoung starts getting the feeling that you might like him as well, he’ll probably openly admit it to the group one day

- he’d show up pretty late to an svt meeting that Seungcheol is holding in the practice room

- “Soonyoung, why are you always so late nowadays?” Seungcheol would say in an upset tone

- “he was probably just hanging out with y/n again,” Chan would say bitterly

- “yeah, what a best friend stealer,” Jun would pout

- “hey man, y/n is my best friend,” Minghao would hit Jun in the arm

- “okay but who became her firST friend?? Das right, it was mE,” Chan would join in the fight

- “alright alright, that discussion can be held somewhere else at some other time,” Seungcheol would stop them. “Soonyoung, seriously, what’s going on? Is this about y/n?”

- “yeah dude,” Seokmin would say. “If you really like her, just admit it already.”

- “no one’s buying it when you say you don’t,” Wonwoo adds and the rest if the boys nod in agreement

- “UGH FINE, YES I DO LIKE Y/N, OKAY?”

- “and I’m sorry for always being late to these kinds of meetings and practices lately. I just really like her okay?”

- “I’m putting all this effort into hanging out with her because I really don’t want to lose her. 

- “You guys know how I am when I’m serious about pursuing something.”

- the whole group goes silent. Seungcheol thinks it over

- “Normally,” Seungcheol starts. “I wouldn’t let this kind of thing slide with me, but I can tell you really like y/n, so I’ll forgive you.”

- “But let me tell you, if she’s willing to spend that much time with you, she probably likes you too.”

- with this, Soonyoung finally decides that it’s time to confess

- one night, your hangout with Soonyoung extended a little later at night than usual, meaning you’d have to walk home to your apartment alone in the dark

- but ofc Soonyoung, being the caring person he is, would want to accompany you home, just to make sure you get there safely

- and while you guys are walking home, Soonyoung’s heart can’t help but flutter while seeing you smile at your conversation under the street lights at night

- he’d be falling so hard at this point, he’ll have to do something about it

- and as a dancer, he’s not one to tell you how he feels with words

- so when you get to your apartment, you unlock your door

- but before you can twist the door open

- he impulsively takes one of your wrists, pulls you close, and locks his lips with yours in a passionate kiss

- and you, unable to fight back the feelings you have for Soonyoung as well, kiss him back

- breathless, he pulls away from you afterwards and looks deeply into your eyes, your faces just a few inches apart

- having noticed you kissed him back, he asks

- “Is it safe to say that the feeling is mutual?”

- “why else do you think I agreed to dance with you?” you laugh 

- he breaks out into a huge smile before pulling you in for another kiss

[sn0wbat]

recently i just felt like revamping my twins’ sprites (they were p old and bad), so this happened

i improved so much