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wakemeupinmay · 2 years ago

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My thoughts on the Eurovision songs this year

1. 🇦🇱 Albania - Duje - Albina & Familja Kelmendi

VERY dramatic, but I could shake my ass to the part in which she isn��t singing

2. 🇦🇲 Armenia - Future Lover - Brunette

„I just wanna make art, read books, be loved and called a good girl“ okay ma'am that’s everyone ur not special

3. 🇦🇺 Australia - Promise - Voyager

Do we know why they are headbanging this much? It couldn’t be bc of this song right?

4. 🇦🇹 Austria - Who the hell is Edgar? - Teya & Salena

Not often is a song made spicier by adding some church singing

5. 🇦🇿 Azerbaijan - Tell me more - TuralTuranX

I have just watched the video for the third time and I start to suspect that there is more than one guy singing, I could be wrong tho

6. 🇧🇪 Belgium - Because of you - Gustaph

He looks like a gay musketeer + weirdly enough this song doesn’t make me want to dance, it makes me want to walk???

7. 🇭🇷 Croatia - Mama ŠČ - Let 3

Thankfully for them I love chaos and not knowing what is going on, BUT I did get scared for a second when they undressed

8. 🇨🇾 Cyprus - Break a broken heart - Andrew Lambrou

I am mesmerized but that won’t get me to like the song :/

9. 🇨🇿 Czechia - My sister‘s crown - Vesna

Idk guys, is this a good song or does it just have a good message? It doesn’t bop for me, I’m so sorry I tried

10. 🇩🇰 Denmark - Breaking my heart - Reiley

Okay, do we also have a version in which we can hear his voice in the chorus better? Thanks, the distorted one playing over his singing is a no no. I dig the outfit tho 10/10 very cute

11. 🇪🇪 Estonia - Bridges - Alika

Don’t worry guys, Estonia is bringing the compulsory piano to the contest this year

12. 🇫🇮 Finland - Cha Cha Cha - Käärijä

Very entertaining and very eurovision by the hulk goblin king, very appreciated by me :)

13. 🇫🇷 France - Évidemment - La Zarra

This. woman. has. the. most. snatched. waist. I. have. ever. seen. Other than that, once again France does what it does best, which is being french

14. 🇬🇪 Georgia - Echo - Iru

Did she get turned into a white worm halfway through? + They surely get the award of „lyrics that make the least sense“ this year. „THIS FEELING IS LORD“

15. 🇩🇪 Germany - Blood & Glitter - Lord of the lost

So happy for Germany leaving its shell for once but maybe reconsider the red latex suit. Otherwise they are really cute and make me smile

16. 🇬🇷 Greece - What they say - Victor Vernicos

How did Greece get Tom Shelby’s son dressed like a school boy from the 1940ies to sing about his hurt feelings?

17. 🇮🇸 Iceland - Power - Diljá

So sad Iceland couldn’t keep up the streak of rly good entries. Unfortunately this song holds no PPPPower over me

18. 🇮🇪 Ireland - We are one - Wild Youth

Don’t worry guys, our knights in shining masks are here to save us. Not rly tho, the song is not that much fun :/

19. 🇮🇱 Israel - Unicorn - Noa Kirel

A song called Unicorn has no business being this serious

20. 🇮🇹 Italy - Due vite - Marco Mengoni

What can I tell u…. It’s definitely Italys entry + Does he sound like an italian Michael Jackson???

21. 🇱🇻 Latvia - Aijā - Sudden Lights

The last time I saw lights like these on stage Germany got 0 points, be careful Latvia

22. 🇱🇹 Lithuania - Stay - Monika Linkytė

What does Čiūto tūto mean?

23. 🇲🇹 Malta - Dance (our own party) - The Busker

I see you Malta, trying to have your own little epic sax moment

24. 🇲🇩 Moldova - Soarele si Luna - Pasha Parfeni

This felt like a spiritual fever dream + gotta love the nuns in the crowd

25. 🇳🇱 Netherlands - Burning Daylight - Mia Nicolai & Dion Cooper

This song is all the stages of grief I go through once my favourite does not win eurovision

26. 🇳🇴 Norway - Queen of Kings - Alessandra

Aye aye captain we stan! BUT I would have looooved if the show (costumes, dance,…) were a cringey eurovisiony pirate thing

27. 🇵🇱 Poland - Solo - Blanka

Why is it giving parody of rich spoiled brat that thinks she can sing bc daddy said so?

28. 🇵🇹 Portugal - Ai Coração - Mimicat

I like it, it’s not a ballad and fun also she looks exactly how I would imagine a Mimicat

29. 🇷🇴 Romania - D.G.T. (Off and On) - Theodor Andrei

I didn’t expect to be going to an underage bondage strip club tonight.

30. 🇸🇲 San Marino - Like an animal - Piqued Jacks

He is giving me mixed signals. Am I sexy Aphrodite or do I stink and am poisonous? Why is he chasing me? Is that good or bad? I’m worried

31. 🇷🇸 Serbia - Samo mi she spava - Luke Black

He is very much Melovin coded but I do connect with the message an awful lot

32. 🇸🇮 Slovenia - Carpe Diem - Joker Out

It’s good, I get the hype, curious what they’ll do on stage tho

33. 🇪🇸 Spain - Eaea - Blanca Paloma

Is it allowed to perform religious rituals on stage?

34. 🇸🇪 Sweden - Tattoo - Loreen

After that huge TV fell on that one kpop performers head this performance makes me extra nervous

35. 🇨🇭 Switzerland - Watergun - Remo Forrer

Don’t worry Remo, Switzerland is one of the safest countries on earth

36. 🇺🇦 Ukraine - Heart of Steel - Tvorchi

I think I have never been more surprised by a country sending a generic pop song. Or maybe it was to be expected the most rn. It’s not bad by any means but also def not a winner and everyone knows that

37. 🇬🇧 United Kingdom - I wrote a song - Mae Muller

If I don’t see the name Mae Muller on the writing credits to this song I will absolutely throw a fit

(List of videos I watched)

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margridarnauds · 4 years ago

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Scattered Thoughts on Treason: The Musical

[warning for some critical discussion]

The Cold Hard Ground:

First song I listened to.

God, we’re getting DARK. This is seriously a mix between a villain song and a hero song, and I’m HERE for it.

This is the one I’m possibly most interested in, because it’s really making me wonder how they’re going to portray the plotters: Are we going to be seeing them as fanatics, or as heroes, or somewhere in-between? In this song, it looks like Catesby is a man broken by grief who turned to fanatical religion as a way of coping with his own suicidal tendencies.

“So TAKEEEEE MEEEEEEEEEEE. You won’t BREEEEEAAAAAK meeee, it’s too late to SAAAAAAAAVVVVEEEE MEEEEEE.”

GOD those final notes are going HARD.

At first, I thought that it was rather scattered, musically wise, but the more I listen to it, the more I think it’s brilliant because the music comes together by the end, as Catesby seems to calcify in his convictions.

I’ll be really curious to see how anyone but Hadley serves this, but a solid 80% of this song, at the moment, is built on his impressive performance. I’ll be really curious in knowing how the livestreams went.

Take Things To Our Own Hands:

Honestly, my favorite song on the album, probably one of them that I can best visualize on stage.

WE NEED TO THINK OF A WAAAAAY TO BRING THE WHOLE SHIP DOWN.

Favorite vocal moment: When all the conspirators’ voices join one another, and then the moment at the end where it sounds almost like a church’s choir.

I absolutely LOVE the slick folkish feel to this, paired with the driven pace, it’s like if “The Story Told” from Monte Cristo decided to go folk, I love it. It really has a feel that I don’t see many musicals going for (Hadestown being the closest, though it goes in a jazzier style than this) , and that’s something really in its favor. If the rest of the songs follow this level of quality and tone, this musical is going to be a really, really fun ride.

Also, it’s very interesting in terms of how, even though this is the conspirators’ “Pump Me Up” song, there’s this very DARK overtone to it, which makes sense given what they’re proposing. Their voices go increasingly hard, almost into a staccato, and I wonder how much of that is diction VS them showing how hardened and increasingly radicalized the conspirators are becoming.

That being said: “I once had influenza but now that’s all gone when things turned sour”?????????????????? I’m trying desperately to wrap my head around this lyric, it sticks out like a sore thumb.

The lyrics in this particular song are, admittedly, its weakest point: They tend to be very, very repetitive, but, in all honesty, it doesn’t really bother me - It works with that mood of the conspirators becoming radicalized.

I know that Hadley tends to get most of the kudos for this song, but the other conspirators (Waylon Jacobs, Oliver Savile and Emmanuel Kojo) deserve MASSIVE kudos for their performances, I’m seriously going to be looking into all of them after this.

The Day Elizabeth Died

I started off not really caring for this song, but I’ve really warmed to it.

I’m really curious about who the main singer in this song is supposed to be, because I feel like that will really change how I feel about the lyrics specifying that she had “An inch of makeup on her face”. If we’re supposed to view this from the perspective of a devoutly religious 17th century Catholic woman, I can understand it more than a Protestant woman, given that it really, really works with some misogynistic stereotypes about Elizabeth.

So, the singer’s apparently Anne Vaux, which makes sense. Okay, I’ll give them this one. A little period-accurate internalized misogyny can be good for the soul.

I LOVE Rebecca La Chance’s voice. It’s so wonderfully clear and strong, delicate, but with steel beneath it.

There’s something almost....wistful, melancholy, and isolated about this song? It strikes a very odd balance between being sympathetic to Elizabeth (some say she died of a broken heart) while condemning her reign.

ALSO. BEST VOCAL MOMENT ON THE ENTIRE ALBUM. “We mourned for her, she was our queen, and for 45 years, she had reigned supreme.” And then the conspirators coming on with “WE DID NOT MOOOOOURRRRN FOR HER. SHEWASOURCAPTOR.” I could, legitimately, listen to that bit alone on repeat, I’m actually obsessed with it. That odd, conflicted feeling between Elizabeth having been Queen for longer than most of England had been alive, providing a sense of stability, while also the very real persecution that English Catholics were under. This is the kind of nuance I really want to see the musical carry forward.

Blind Faith

I don’t really know what to say except that Martha Percy’s love for Thomas Percy is juxtaposed with Thomas Percy’s feelings for Catesby.

Literally.

That’s the song.

If this musical ever develops a fandom, there are going to be a hundred Catesby/Thomas fics, with James/Thomas being the darkhorse fic.

It’s hard to judge this one, simply because it’s much more conventional love song - It sounds similar to, for example, “That Would Be Enough”, if Alexander Hamiltpn decided to blow up George III instead of join the American Revolution. It’s a TWIST on the conventional love song, but it still follows similar beats.

But I DO love how their voices go together, the song really starts to shine when that happens.

That last “This path was MINE to choose, he has nothing to prove”, probably is the best vocal moment.

Overall, I don’t have MANY thoughts on this song in comparison to the others, but I can also see myself warming up to it over time.

The Promise

“His face is quite nice” It’s VERY obvious they’re going for a queer comic relief interpretation of James, which I honestly have mixed feelings about given that he is, clearly, going to be the one that our protagonists are trying to get rid of. There’s.....something about that, a bunch of presumably straight protagonists ganging up to kill a stereotypically portrayed gay man. I know that historically, James WAS, but.....I still don’t like how stereotypical they played this one. Someone could point to Herod from JCS but, in all fairness, Herod was written in the 1970s (and, tbh, given that the central relationship in the musical is Jesus and Judas, you could argue that the entire musical is very, very homoerotic, which makes it less glaring.) This is...well, I’ll have to see how the musical deals with it. I’m willing to give it a fair shake, but they might have set themselves up for danger here.

But Daniel Boys is, admittedly, serving this song on a silver platter.

Really, really going into the Spoiled Child Route here.

If it sounds like I’m disappointed with this song compared to the others, it’s because......yeah, I kind of am. Musically, it’s fine and a little catchy, lyrically, it’s fine, but that nuance I’d been seeing in the other songs goes out the window. James isn’t my favorite historical figure of all time (Bro basically set up the English Civil War), but there still HAD to be a better way to do him justice than this.

It doesn’t hurt that, unlike the other songs, which were demonstrably TREASON, this one is very much.....a JCS/Hamilton rip-off. Like, it’s very, very blatant.

Love the rising strings when Percy tells him that Elizabeth is dying, that sense of tension - It does remind me a little of something I heard in The Pirate Queen, but you know what? I’ll give it to them.

Lowkey obsessed with Oliver Saville’s eyebrow raise when he says “You could save England.”

The problem is that they’re leaning so hard into the comic route that, when James says that he’ll be a fair king, it really, really makes the Catholic nobility sound dumb as Hell to listen to him. Like “Yes, man who routinely, gleefully sings about cutting off people’s heads, I’ll listen to you!” I know they’re desperate but....come on.

But also. THAT HIGH NOTE. Daniel Boys really put 110% in there.

Overall, my takeaway is that this musical could either do very, very well or very, very badly, depending on how they play it. It’s hard to judge because the public only has access to 5 tracks (except for the lucky ducks who bought tickets to the stream, where they got access to 10) - It’s hard to judge a musical based off of 5 tracks, and a musical about the Gunpowder Plot with, say, a love song called “Blind Faith” almost sounds like something out of a parody, something destined to be one of those flops that go down in history. BUT, that being said, the musical has some very strong vocal performances and some really good music, when it keeps to its own mood and style instead of trying to go off of what other, more successful musicals have done. There’s some real, real promise in this musical, and I’ll be both anxious and excited to see how it all turns out (and if they ever offer a full purchase for the live recording......I’d honestly probably buy it.) It was a shame I found out about it so late in the game, because I’d have totally bought tickets to the stream if I had known earlier.

#treason the musical

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ginnyzero · 5 years ago

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Retelling Old Stories

I've written a book based on old fairy tales and legends and am currently reviewing the Shrek movies in Action Movie Friday. (Shrek 2 post coming next, I hope.) I thought I'd talk about retelling fairy tales, myths and legends.

Myths, fairytales, legends, these are the stories that are near and dear to our hearts. And let's face it, they're familiar, comforting and popular. Fairy tales such as The Sleeping Princess, The Little Mermaid and Beauty and the Beast have been told over and over to young children for generations. These stories are oral traditions passed down from generation to generation and have strayed quite a bit from their horrific and sexist roots. So much, that outside of a few key points their original creators may not recognize them anymore.

These oral traditions form the basis of the hero's journey which can be found in high fantasy stories such as Lord of the Rings and Science Fiction stories, such as Star Wars. They've been satirized (Ella Enchanted, the movie), parodied (Shrek) and outright made fun of (Mirror, Mirror) and also taken far too seriously (Snow White & The Huntsman.) Just as much as they've been played straight (see the Elemental Master Series of Mercedes Lackey.) And they've been mixed together until almost unrecognizable. (The Princess & The Frog, Frozen, Once Upon a Time, the 500 Kingdoms also by Mercedes Lackey.)

The great thing about fairy tales and myths and legends is that they have a very low risk level. People are far more likely to pick up something to read of watch that is relatively familiar to them and that they know they already enjoy rather than a brand new concept they don't understand and aren't sure they'll like. Fairy tales are comfort food. People know they like them. And given a choice between a concept they aren't sure of and a fairy tale based media, they're more than likely to choose a fairy tale based media.

So, how do you go about retelling these fairy tales and making them fresh and new for your audience? This was a question I (sort of) asked myself when I started to write the Dawn Warrior. (Available in Ebook & Paperback.) How do I take Sleeping Beauty and make her different without relying on, say, what we know of her through Disney or from Grimm, not the TV Show. (Which honestly, isn't much in either case.) And make them partly relevant without losing making a good story?

Change the Roles:

What if the Princess really isn't the Princess? What if she's the bodyguard in disguise that's protecting the real princess from assassins? (The Decoy Princess, Dawn Cook) What if the Princess is also a spy? (The Princess Series Jim C. Hines) Maybe Prince Charming is actually an actor!

I mean, come on, in real life unless your Prince William and Harry and work for the British Royal Navy, royals don't really have adventures. (I wouldn't want to get on the bad side of Queen Elizabeth either.)

Or, maybe the Princess and Prince aren't really the good guys after all. Maybe it's the Big Bad Wolf or the evil stepmother or even the sea witch. (Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister, Gregory Maguire) Or, to borrow from Hoodwinked, the Big Bad Wolf is really an investigative reporter trying to do an expose on Red Riding Hood. (I mean, she can't be all that sweet and innocent.)

A good example of this was a recent Sleeping Beauty movie that was in the horror genre. (Unfortunately I heard it was a really bad horror movie.) The Sleeping Beauty in the movie was supposed to be the damsel in distress and ended up being both the trap and the villain.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdEo_t-iVbM

(I'll just leave this here.)

Change the Setting:

Fairy tales in SPACE!!! (Lunar Chronicles, Marissa Meyer) Okay, there aren't a lot of fairy tales in space. I think I saw another example on instafreebie the other day. In fact, there aren't many romances in space either. (I was listening to a podcast about an indie author who was doing this and she was the first writing romances set in the backdrops of aliens?) But, this is like Star Wars. Greek Myths in SPACE!!!! (Seriously, Star Wars is built around the classical hero's journey. The franchise even freely admits it in their authorized literature. I've got a book by Bantam called Star Wars: The Magic of Myth that goes through it step by step.)

This is one of the easier ways to make fairy tales seem more relevant and seems to be currently the most popular. Grimm the TV Show, Once Upon a Time (in Wonderland), The Harry Dresden Files, and Fables, all take fairy tales and legends and drop them into the middle of the modern world. I include Harry Dresden, not because he's playing out a fairy tale so to speak, but he's some sort of misguided Prince Charming type on his own hero's journey. The book Charming by James Eliot, takes the character of "Prince Charming" plays it straight, and makes it a bloodline that is involved in some sort of knighthood charged with keeping the mundane world safe from the evil things that go bump in the night set in modern times.

Mercedes Lackey took a slightly different approach with her Elemental Masters series. She took fairy tales, played them straight, but set them in Edwardian times right up through the First World War. By doing so, she was able to show how the beginnings of the modern world like industrialization and rail roads and wars fought with machine guns instead of swords were effecting the world of magic and the magical creatures. (For instance, all the pollution made it easier for evil or nasty type elementals and creatures to thrive and good elementals and creatures that couldn't abide cold iron were dying off or going into hiding.)

Change the Genders:

Let's face it. Fairy tales are pretty sexist, no matter what your gender is. I had in the first draft of the Dawn Princess an entire rant by Roxana, who is a 'Beauty Asleep' about the differences between how a female Princess who is cursed to sleep and a male Prince is cursed to sleep and how neither tale does royalty any justice whatsoever.(Seriously, in the male version, when the Princess who had been sitting by his bedside took a nap, the clock should have reset, the Prince shouldn't still have sneezed and been woken by the maid.)

Maybe it's really Prince Charming asleep in the Castle and well, Beauty has to belt on her sword and gird her courage to get through the hedge and kill the dragon. Or, the tower bound male Rapunzel is intruded upon by a Pirate Princess who is looking for gold, not love. Maybe it isn't a brave little tailor but a brave seamstress! Or it is a male who is captured by a bunch of cannibalistic female bandits.

...

Okay, there is taking some things too far. (That story is terrible no matter what.)

Apply some Common Sense:

In fairy tales, things don't always make sense. I read them and go "why? why would they do that?" A lot of times Princes don't get punished for their ill deeds. Another Prince comes along, "saves" them and they go about their adventures without showing any sort of remorse for what they did in the first place. Princes don't become goose boys or shepherds or kitchen tweenies.(Or at least, not very often, I think Faithful John/Hans is about the only one I can think of.)

No, those punishments are reserved for Princesses who have been tricked into changing places with their maids and end up being goose girls or in the kitchen. (I can think of half a dozen variations of that tale.) And the Princess, instead of finding a nice baker or farmer to settle down with who appreciates her, instead figures out how to reveal her plight to the Prince who actually married her uppity maid/sister and seems happy with the maid/sister and once the maid/sister is out of the way, marries the Prince. (The Prince was tricked, happy to be tricked and the Princess took him anyways? That makes no sense.)

A really good example of this is the original and horrific Beauty Asleep tale. In the original tale, the King comes upon Beauty Asleep in her tower and rapes her, while she's asleep, repeatedly. In fact, he gets her pregnant with twins. The babes are born and he doesn't even take them with him! No. He leaves them with their sleeping mother. One of the babes gets hungry, as babies do! And sucks the thorn out of her finger that was keeping her asleep. Beauty wakes up. The Queen finds out about her existence. Tries to kill her. The King kills the Queen in turn and ends up marrying Beauty and bringing her and his twins to the castle.

Just what the ever loving hell?

It's good to be king?

No, really, the Queen should have taken Beauty's side. They could have killed the King for being an adulterer and ruled the kingdom together setting up the twins as the heirs. Female solidarity. Because the story as written is insane.

There's a post wandering about tumblr about swan maidens and selkies. And how awful the stories are about the men who take the swan maiden's cloaks and the selkies' skins to force these women to be their brides. One of the reblogs adds the caveat that it feels like these stories don't take into account the actual nature of swans and seals. Swans are pretty. They look graceful.

Swans are mean, they hiss, they bite, they're incredibly aggressive and they can break bones. Approach with caution. Don't try to steal from them. Don't try to pet them. Aggressive swan is aggressive. Okay. Anyone who steals a swan maiden's cloak deserves the punch in the face!

And seals, seals aren't all that nice either! Zefrank1 hasn't done a true facts about seals, but maybe he should. Male seals are called bulls for a reason! Elephant Seal bulls charge at each other when they fight. Leopard Seals are considered one of the ocean's more dangerous predators and take on whales and sharks. Seals train well to do tricks. Look, just, don't mess with them because not only are they cute and have sharp teeth and claws, they're smart. Do you really want to mess with the woman who can steal all your nets and drive the fish away and beat you to a bloody pulp? Seal fights involve mud wrestling.

Add some reality to the stories. Give the actions of those involved real consequences. Change the personalities to actually reflect the animals they are sharing their bodies with.

Mash things together:

This is another popular tactic and TV Tropes calls it the "Fractured" Fairy Tale. Think how in Once Upon a Time, (spoiler alert) Rumpelstiltskin is also the Beast of Beauty and the Beast and his father is Peter Pan. And he's the grandfather of the Truest Believer and thus the "father in law" of Emma Swan the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming. And that barely dips a toe into the confusing of Once Upon a Time Family relationships.

Mercedes Lackey also did a version of mixing up of fairy tales in her 500 Kingdoms. In the 500 Kingdoms, The Tradition is a form of magic that ties to make fairy tales happen no matter what type of tale they are and no matter if all the pieces are actually 100% correct. Fairy Godmothers are there to steer the tradition so that disaster doesn't strike constantly. (Because what if the Prince of the Cinderella tale was actually a Princess or well, a Prince who was too young, too old, or just liked other Princes.)

Fables does this as well. Prince Charming is the same Prince across Snow White, Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella. Sleeping Beauty ends up marrying the Beast in her second marriage. (Prince Charming is good at wooing, not staying.) The Gingerbread witch of Hansel and Gretel ends up being the witch who puts most of the tales in action across the Enchanted Forest. The last arc I read, Rose Red was making her own version of Camelot (and there was much trepidation about how that was going to turn out, probably badly.)

Grab a bunch of different stories that seem to work well together, stitch them together in a way that makes sense or seems fun. It's okay not to always tell the exact same tale.

Add Real People's stories:

Look, if you're going for a more empowered woman in your stories. There are plenty of women in history that were actually pretty awesome. And I'm not just talking about Esther from the Bible or Rahab. (Both pretty awesome ladies.) There were female pirates and female queens who outwitted and beat their male counterparts to be on the throne and to keep themselves out of jail. There are female scientists, female snipers and well, I'm sure if you look hard enough you can find something a woman did in real life that men get praised for more often.

In fact, one person go so fed up with the way fairy tale princesses are praised at places such as Disney, they created a site/book for girls about such heroines at Rejectedprincesses.com.

Youtube has videos labelled things like Top Ten Badass women from History you probably don't know about. (But if you'd read Rejected Princesses you actually might!)

So, don't be afraid to use some real world inspiration to give you ideas about how awesome your female characters can be.

And these are just a few ideas on how to take something old and make it something "new."

In the Dawn Warrior, I took a bunch of these. I applied some common sense. Changed the Princess' role. And really mashed some things together. But, I kept a medieval fairy tale like setting because I wanted to keep this series different from my other series, Heaven's Heathens MC, which is a light science fantasy that could read urban fantasy if you squint at it. (Or maybe it's the other way around.) Two series set in the modern/future world seemed a bit silly to me.

Mostly, my advice is if you want to retell a fairy tale or myth or legend, have fun with it. Take your ingredients, mix them up as needed and don't sacrifice your story for message. (Because really, that gets old very quickly.)

Whelp, now if you like fairy tales there are plenty of pieces of media in this post to check out. Happy reading/watching/researching!

#writblr #wrtblr #writing advice #writing tips #fairy tales #myths

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thereallygoodblogshow · 5 years ago

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MA Fashion and Textile Practices Major Project Path - 5th September

Punk and Vivienne Westwood

The punk scene in both the UK and America was of course to continue long after the demise of the Sex Pistols, they were just the catalyst to project the punk sound into the mainstream. In the US bands such as; The Stimulators, Bad Brains - significant for being the first all black punk band, Black Flag - my brothers favourite band, Dead Kennedy’s, Agnostic Front, Minor Threat and more had all drawn inspiration from the like of Iggy Pop and The Stooges, the Ramones and the Sex Pistols and carried punk forward into the future. Bands like Nirvana, Rage Against the Machine and Green Day are bands we know today because they were inspired by those earlier punk pioneers. Billy Joe Armstrong (2010), lead singer of Green Day spoke to Rolling Stone magazine about the Sex Pistols impact on him as a writer:

“The Sex Pistols released just one album … but it punched a huge hole in everything that was bulls*** about rock music, and everything that was going wrong with the world, too, no one else has had that kind of impact with one album. Never Mind the Bollocks is the root of everything that goes on at modern-rock radio. It’s just an amazing thing that no one’s been able to live up to.”

In the UK The Clash and The Damned continued with chart success’s and other bands grew from punks influence such as; Joy Division, Siouxsie and the Banshees - who had been around for some years but were now getting noticed, The Cure, The Fall, Caberet Voltaire and many more. The sound was categorised as alternative and independent music. Johnny Rotten himself was soon to fall foul of Malcolm McLaren who left him stranded in San Francisco without money or a flight home, McLaren was off to forge his own career in pop and to manage other bands such as Adam and the Ants and Bow Wow Wow - both of which were dressed by Vivienne Westwood. Eventually finding his way home to London, Rotten formed his own band called Public Image Ltd, a sarcastic reference to the media machine that McLaren had so desperately pushed the Sex Pistols towards.

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Public Image Ltd [PiL Official, Public Image Ltd]. (2013, Oct 10). Public Image Limited - This Is Not A Love Song (Official Video) [Video file]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Az_GCJnXAI0

Malcolm was to go on and achieve relative chart success with songs such as ‘Buffalo Gals’, ‘Double Dutch’ and ‘Madame Butterfly’ which is one of my favourite songs. Growing up in the 80′s I had no idea who Malcolm McLaren was but I liked the songs he produced. His sound had taken influences from hip hop culture and electronic sounds and mixed them together, much like his attitude towards collaboration amongst bands in his punk days. I get the impression from my research that he wasn’t well liked on the punk scene, The Damned lead vocalist Dave Vanian (2019) once described him as “a Fagin type character”, and we all know how Johnny Rotten felt about him before and after the end of the Sex Pistols. He doesn’t come across as overly likable, but you cannot deny his ability to see the potential in people and the way he utilised his instinct for business.

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Malcolm McLaren [Sherry Wallace]. (2012, Dec 22). "madam butterfly" malcolm mclaren [Video file]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3JN8o8-ZK5s

After the breakup of the Sex Pistols in 1978, Vivienne Westwood had already renamed her and McLaren’s shop SEX on The Kings Road to Seditionaires, and had been selling clothing inspired by fetish and bondage clothing into wearable fashion, utilising zips, pins and straps within her designs. This of course was a huge hit with the punk youth and bands McLaren adorned. In 1980 Vivienne was left disenchanted with the collapse of punk in the UK and renamed the shop Worlds End, as that’s how it must have appeared to be. This name was to be the last incarnation of the shop and is still called Worlds End today.

Westwood, V. (1977). Anarchist Punk Gang – The 1% ers shirt from Seditionaries,1977. [Clothing]. Retrieved from https://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/185218.

In 1981 Westwood and McLaren showed their work for the first time on the major catwalks, this was The Pirate Collection based on a romanticised vision of the pirate. This look was to be seminal in the New Romantic aesthetic, showcased especially by bands such as Visage and Adam and the Ants. Vivienne pioneered her own cutting techniques based on rectangles and taking inspiration from historical cuts. She would make a toile of the garment in smaller scale on a reduced sized dummy, once the fit was correct it was then scaled it up to actual size. Throughout the 80′s Westwood continued to be inspired by different cultures and times, her collection in SS'82 was Buffalo Girls, in AW that year it was Peruvian women, SS’83 was Blade Runner and so on. It was to be what she called her Pagan years. By 1984 her collaboration with Malcolm McLaren had ceased.

Westwood had been with McLaren since her break up from her first husband Derek in 1965. She already had son Ben, whom she’d had with Derek when they moved into a flat in Clapham. They then went on to have son Joseph together in 1967. Prior to meeting Derek she had been a primary school teacher and had made her own jewellery, which she sold on a stall on Portobello Road. Westwood has said that although he was a driving force behind her, she felt he was controlling. Westwood (2014) said of their meeting;

“Malcolm chased me, I didn’t want him for my boyfriend. He didn’t look after himself. And I started trying to cook for him a bit and stuff like that. And, well, that’s how it started. The point is, I didn’t want Malcolm at first, but I did, in fact, end up getting pregnant by him, even then, I didn’t really want him."

Westwood, V. (1977). The Pirate Collection. [Clothing]. Retrieved from https://blog.viviennewestwood.com/the-story-so-far/.

In the late 80′s Westwood’s style changed again, this time her girls were seen sporting fashion which parodied the upper classes. Westwood’s 1987 Harris Tweed collection was inspired by a young ballet dancer she had spotted on the tube wearing her hair up in a plaited bun, ballet shoes in bag and wearing a Harris Tweed jacket. For this collection she used fine wool tweeds and velvet’s - fabrics that the aristocracy would have used. This air of luxury continued to be a feature throughout most of her collections in the 80′s, her signature corsets becoming pieces to aspire to. Her model muse at the time was Sara Stockbridge who had the perfect look to carry Vivienne’s signature aesthetic. I always remember the cover of I-D magazine Sara was on, she was just so quirky and different compared to other models at the time.

I-D Magazine, n.d. (1987). Sara Stockbridge 50th Anniversary Issue. [Editorial]. Retrieved from https://www.brennan-and-burch.co.uk/blogs/b-and-b-blog/45795267-sara-stockbridge-iconic-muse-of-an-era.

Ryan, D. (1987). Harris Tweed Collection. [Photograph]. Retrieved from http://worldsendshop.co.uk/lips-print/.

The 90′s decade sees her Anglomania years, Westwood’s take on the connection in fashion between the UK and France. She said (1993) of the collection:

“On the English side we have tailoring and an easy charm, on the French side that solidity of design and proportion that comes from never being satisfied because something can always be done to make it better, more refined.”

She took inspiration from Gainsborough’s paintings, country charm and France’s obsession with English tailoring. And in the winter of that year she went all out for tartan - a look we probably most associate with Westwood’s post punk collections. The collection was created in conjunction with her new husband Andreas Kronthaler. They had met previously in 1988 when Westwood was teaching for Fashion Design at the Vienna School of Applied Art. He moved to London to work for her company in 1989, and their first joint collection was the Cut and Slash collection in SS’1991. They married in 1993 and have been married ever since. Whilst he is essentially a silent partner in her business she has since acknowledged him as a major contributor to her Gold Collection for the last 25 years.

Westwood, V. (1993). Andreas Kronthaler for Vivienne Westwood. [Photograph]. Retrieved from https://www.vogue.com/fashion-shows/fall-1993-ready-to-wear/andreas-kronthaler-for-vivienne-westwood.

From 2000 to present Westwood has concentrated on what she calls her Exploration years. She has been fascinated by the properties of different fabrics and what they can bring to her designs, one has fed the other, she has been treating fabric like a living entity. Since her early days on The Kings Road she has been incredibly successful as a designer. She has 12 Vivienne Westwood stores in the UK and another 63 outlets worldwide, as well as a comprehensive e commerce website.

Of late Vivienne has become concerned about the sustainability of her fashion business and ‘fast fashion’ within the fashion industry as a whole. Her new mantra is ‘quality not quantity’ and has no qualms about using her name as leverage to get ethical fashion into the mainstream. In 2014 she put a halt on expanding her business further - despite her business in China doing so well - to concentrate on seeing how her own business was effecting the environment and to work hard to ensure that her own standards of sustainability were met. Westwood (2014) said of this decision:

“Do I feel guilty about all the consumption that the fashion world promotes? Well, I can answer that by saying that I am now trying to make my own business more efficient and self-sustaining. This also means trying to make everybody who works in it happy, if I can."

That same year she launched her ‘Save The Arctic Campaign’ which featured no less than 60 celebrities sporting a specially designed T-Shirt with all proceeds of the sale going towards the charity and climate activists Greenpeace. The campaign featured celebrities such as George Clooney, Chris Martin, Grayson Perry, Kate Moss to name but a few, who were photographed by award-winning celebrity photographer Andy Gotts. Vivienne, along with some of the celebrities traveled the London underground to promote the campaign, and were pictured on the long escalators - lined with the remaining celebrity photographs - which lead up to the main head quarters of Shell Oil.

Gotts, A. (2014). Paloma Faith Save The Arctic. [Photograph]. Retrieved from https://www.viviennewestwood.com/en/westwood-world/save-the-artic-campaign/.

Zimbio, n.d. (2015). Vivienne Westwood, Sadie Frost, Leebo Freeman and Andy Gotts attend the Save The Arctic Collection launch at Waterloo Station on July 13, 2015 in London, England.. [Photograph]. Retrieved from http://www.zimbio.com/photos/Vivienne+Westwood/Andy+Gotts/Save+Arctic+Collection+Launch+Photocall/57Ugwti3R73.

The T-Shirt design featured a heart shaped globe with a flag marking the Arctic region. Vivienne (2014) felt the help of celebrities was beneficial to the campaign:

“Andy is popular with celebrities because he makes it all a pleasant experience. I also really relied on the help of Jerry Hall and Georgia May to do this. Celebrities are often the key to getting a message across, public opinion is very responsive to celebrity.”

The logo for Save The Arctic was also used to launch her SS’14 Gold Label collection show. The campaign has gone part way in ending Shell Oil’s interest on the area. After three years of constant campaigning by Greenpeace and with the support of over 7 million people, Shell Oil have quit drilling in the Arctic. There is still has a long way to go before the pressure is off this magnificent region, which supports human life and animal life not found anywhere else on Earth.

Westwood wasn’t content to leave campaign there however, and in 2019 at London fashion week John Sauven, executive director of Greenpeace UK, along with Vivienne herself took to the catwalk to conduct a climate protest catwalk spectacular. London fashion week was the ideal platform for Westwood, already a seasoned fashion aficionado and Greenpeace to push the need for large fashion brands to start taking sustainability and climate change into consideration, before it’s too late. John Sauven referenced Greta Thunberg - the school girl who made a stand against climate change by sitting outside the parliament building in Sweden, but then had the incredible support of 1.5 million school children around the world when on the 15th March came out of their schools in support of her. Sauven (2019) said of her actions:

"Greta is that shy girl sitting at the back of the classroom, she’s not a leader, she doesn’t see herself in that way. She sees herself as a very shy, quiet girl who doesn’t usually say very much. And you think, wow, that’s immense power, and it gives you immense hope. You need all these different types of people to create change. The people that shout the loudest, they maybe aren’t the people you’re going to see coming forward in the next generation.”

In the last few years Vivienne Westwood has concentrated more on using her fashion and status for campaigning and activism. She has gone on to look at how businesses can reform their policies, looking at climate ecology, looking at the effect of fracking and supporting to anti-fracking campaigns, and giving support to Cool Earth - a charity which helps indigenous communities to halt deforestation. She has her own Climate Revolution website which she fills with information on her campaigning and current fashion related items. She often designs T-Shirt graphics and donates the designs to be used by charities, her latest T-Shirt is for the charity magazine Big Issue. Here Vivienne (2019) explains her reasoning why her new Tao T-Shirt is priced at £120:

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Vivienne Westwood [Vivienne Westwood]. (2019, Aug 19). IoU - Cotton and the Fashion Industry [Video file]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=evSoIaootlE

I totally support Vivienne’s attitude on why we should be paying more for our fashion - paying more and buying less. I had to think about the last time I actually bought something new, most of my purchases are from eBay or charity shops, being poor certainly helps you budget for fashion! I also love her mantra of ‘Buy well, choose well and make it last’, which applies to us as the consumer and also to fashion industry brands who need to look at the materials they are using and the way they are manufacturing their products. £120 is a lot for a T-Shirt but I can see the reasoning behind the price tag, you are paying for a more sustainable product which should have the longevity to be worn for many years, and the skilled workers who are paid fair wages to make it. As well as the proceeds going towards the Big Issue - a charity which has helped homeless people in the UK for many years.

The Big Issue, n.d. (2019). Vivienne Westwood's exclusive design just for The Big Issue is available from her store for £120 with all proceeds going to The Big Issue. [Fashion]. Retrieved from https://www.bigissue.com/latest/why-vivienne-westwood-collaborated-with-the-big-issue-on-a-limited-edition-t-shirt/.

The T-Shirt is really nice actually, it’s a call to the younger generation to build their characters, because it’s their characters which shape them as human beings, they are the ones who are going to create the future. I based my practice work on Vivienne’s Climate Revolution T-Shirt because I liked the simple sleeveless shape and raw edges, clearly based around the use of the rectangle that she has used in many of her collections.

Vivienne Westwood has always used the T-Shirt as the affordable and accessible way of buying her fashion, as with many high fashion designers, it is the one product which enables the consumer to purchase a piece of them. It’s the one product which is wearable by so many, it’s a unisex item which appeals to a broad range of people - and the more the merrier if it’s promoting a good cause.

https://www.viviennewestwood.com/en/women/clothing/t-shirts/square-t-shirt-climate-revolution-white-nat-white-CLA305AW550168.html?cgid=women-clothing-tshirts#page=1&start=5

Vivienne Westwood became a Dame in 1992 when she received her OBE from Queen Elizabeth II. Always the one to make a statement, she went commando to the awards ceremony and apparently forgot her lack of underwear when twirling in her skirt for the photographers! Making a statement has been a way of life for Vivienne Westwood, from her early designs in her shop Let It Rock and then SEX to showing her support for numerous campaigns as a charity activist - she is the ultimate fashion queen of punk and long may she reign!

The Big Issue, n.d. (2019). Vivienne Westwood is making a fashion statement with the Big Issue. [Editorial]. Retrieved from http://climaterevolution.co.uk/wp/hero-post/vivienne-westwood-is-making-a-fashion-statement-with-the-big-issue/.

Websites:

Pavarini, M.C. (2014). Vivienne Westwood designs logo for Greenpeace. Retrieved from https://www.sportswear-international.com/news/stories/Vivienne-Westwood-designs-logo-for-Greenpeace-7945.

Thorpe, V. (2014). Vivienne Westwood: climate change, not fashion, is now my priority. Retrieved from https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2014/feb/08/vivienne-westwood-arctic-campaign.

Alexander, E. (2014). Vivienne Westwood 'didn’t want' to have a relationship with Malcolm McLaren: 'I thought that maybe he’d got the wrong idea and it was my fault. Retrieved from https://www.independent.co.uk/news/people/vivienne-westwood-didn-t-want-to-have-a-relationship-with-malcolm-mclaren-i-thought-that-maybe-he-d-9746980.html.

Westwood, V. (n.d). The story so far. Retrieved from https://blog.viviennewestwood.com/the-story-so-far/.

Westwood, V. (n.d). Climate Revolution. Retrieved from http://climaterevolution.co.uk/wp/hero-post/vivienne-westwood-is-making-a-fashion-statement-with-the-big-issue/.

Hall, H. (2014). Vivienne Westwood launches star-studded Save the Arctic Campaign. Retrieved from https://www.stylist.co.uk/life/vivienne-westwood-launches-star-studded-save-the-arctic-campaign-featuring-kate-moss-naomi-campbell-and-david-gandy/60901.

Whitehouse, M. (2019). vivienne westwood and greenpeace talk staying angry and finding hope. Retrieved from https://i-d.vice.com/en_uk/article/ywy4gg/vivienne-westwood-greenpeace-john-sauven-climate-crisis.

Whitmore, G. (2013). Vivienne Westwood: Her life and career so far - in pictures. Retrieved from Whitmore, G. (2013). Vivienne Westwood: Her life and career so far - in pictures. Retrieved from https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/gallery/2013/nov/30/vivienne-westwood-sexpistols.

Petrusich, A. (2016). Where Punk Rock Begins. Retrieved from https://www.newyorker.com/culture/cultural-comment/where-punk-rock-begins.

Chick, S. (2017). MC5 – 10 of the best. Retrieved from https://www.theguardian.com/music/2017/aug/17/mc5-10-of-the-best.

Uhelszki, J. (2018). MC5 on ‘Kick Out The Jams’: “We weren’t on a meth power trip… just a power trip”. Retrieved from https://www.uncut.co.uk/features/the-making-of-mc5-s-kick-out-the-jams-33061.

Gibson, C. (2016). What happened in Chicago in 1968, and why is everyone talking about it now?. Retrieved from https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/arts-and-entertainment/wp/2016/07/18/what-happened-in-chicago-in-1968-and-why-is-everyone-talking-about-it-now/?noredirect=on.

BBC News. (2018). 1968 Democratic National Convention: A 'week of hate'. Retrieved from https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-45226132.

Ramone, M. (n.d). Marky Ramone. Retrieved from http://www.markyramone.com/biography/.

Rowley, S. (2017). The Damned: an epic tale of fast living and faster music. Retrieved from https://www.loudersound.com/features/the-damned-an-epic-tale-of-fast-living-and-faster-music.

Phillips, S. (2013). Robert Golden's best photograph: the 1976 Notting Hill carnival riots. Retrieved from https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2013/mar/13/robert-golden-best-photograph.

Song Facts. (n.d). White Riot by The Clash. Retrieved from https://www.songfacts.com/facts/the-clash/white-riot.

Ward, O. (2019). British politics is (Johnny) rotten—no wonder punk music is making a comeback. Retrieved from https://www.prospectmagazine.co.uk/arts-and-books/british-politics-is-johnny-rotten-no-wonder-punk-music-is-making-a-comeback.

Lauderdale, B. (2015). A Brief Political History Of The United Kingdom. Retrieved from https://fivethirtyeight.com/features/a-brief-political-history-of-the-united-kingdom/.

BBC News. (2011). Smashed Hits: Is London Calling the best anthem for a city?. Retrieved from https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-14324385.

Welch, J. (2016). Sex Pistols: Anarchy in the UK and the tour they tried to ban. Retrieved from https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-norfolk-38165091.

Serena, K. (2018). The Short, Tragic Romance Of Sid Vicious And Nancy Spungen. Retrieved from https://allthatsinteresting.com/nancy-spungen.

Alt Press. (2018). WAS THE SEX PISTOLS’ FIRST US TOUR AS DESTRUCTIVE AS REPORTS SAY?. Retrieved from https://www.altpress.com/features/sex_pistols_first_u-s-_tour_destructive_1978/.

Wawzenek, B. (2017). Influence and Infamy: How the Sex Pistols Impacted the Future of Music. Retrieved from https://diffuser.fm/sex-pistols-influence/.

Perry, A. (2018). The end of the Sex Pistols: how punk died 40 years ago today, and John Lydon rose from its ashes. Retrieved from https://www.telegraph.co.uk/music/what-to-listen-to/end-sex-pistols-punk-died-40-years-ago-today-john-lydon-rose/.

Documentaries:

Miller, J.J. , MacDonald, E. , Barbisan, J. , Tabata, S. (Writers) & Miller, J.J. (Director). (2019). Punk: Part 1 [Television series episode]. In D. Murray (Producer), Punk. Canada, North America: Sky Arts.

Miller, J.J. , MacDonald, E. , Barbisan, J. , Tabata, S. (Writers) & Miller, J.J. (Director). (2019). Punk: Part 2 [Television series episode]. In D. Murray (Producer), Punk. Canada, North America: Sky Arts.

Miller, J.J. , MacDonald, E. , Barbisan, J. , Tabata, S. (Writers) & Miller, J.J. (Director). (2019). Punk: Part 3 [Television series episode]. In D. Murray (Producer), Punk. Canada, North America: Sky Arts.

Miller, J.J. , MacDonald, E. , Barbisan, J. , Tabata, S. (Writers) & Miller, J.J. (Director). (2019). Punk: Part 4 [Television series episode]. In D. Murray (Producer), Punk. Canada, North America: Sky Arts.

0 notes

attract-mode-collective · 8 years ago

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The Making Of Porn Parody Of An Old Kenji Eno Game, Part 1

[NOTE: as mentioned when describing the new direction for the blog, those long-form pieces that I had been debuting in the newsletter will now appear here first. Though, perhaps predictably, one that I’ve been working on is taking forever to finish, so I figured that it wouldn’t be a bad idea to republish ones that only subscribers had access to. Which many couldn’t even read in the first place, due to technical reasons. Hence why I am pleased to present to the general public, something that first appeared in the Super Attractive Club newsletter #10! The following is largely presented as it, though the author of the game’s Twitter handle has been added. Oh, and one more thing: Part 2 is headed your way fairly soon...]

One of my semi-regular haunts on the internet is the video game message board Select Button. Recently, a thread popped up entitled “This Ain’t Kenji Eno’s D: The XXX Porno Parody” in the back corner, for members only (hence the lack of any link).

It was started by an individual who goes by the handle HOBO and the following is all of his posts, presented largely as is, with minimal editing, for the sake of maintaining historical accuracy.

The formatting is also mostly the same; everything italicized is either someone else’s comments or my own notes and everything else is HOBO’s words, which have been published with permission.

D3: The Natural Playboys is still in the midst of development and I will provide further developments when the time is right…

10/27/16

I am on the SB Discord right now, as StanHansen, the #1 gajin pro-wrestler of all times. I have vowed that I will make the video game DDD, a sequel to D2. My sequel won't be for Dreamcast. It probably won't even be a video game. I downloaded Klik n Play, which I was competent enough to use way back when but now I'm a slow-witted fellow. I can't figure out how to get this shit running in W7. So this is gonna be a Ren'py game.

I don't want to draw characters so I'm just going to cut faces out of old porno mags I stole. I still keep under my bed. I highly recommend everyone invest in old timey pornography, or, if you're fortunate, make your own. We'll probably be spending a lot of the future in the dark and smut can help you through some hard times.

One of the magazines hidden under my bed is the May 2001 issue of TORSO: The bodybuilding magazine of the future. It has features such as Building Strong BONERS: Do you Kegel? and Confessions of a Dildo Connoisseur, both of which may be better ideas for games than DDD: The Natural Playboys. I'm flipping through it now and I am not sure I want any of these faces in my Kenji Eno tribute game. All these guys look like they were auditioning for an infomercial for a nose hair trimmer and got tricked into taking off their clothes. And getting boners. All slightly confused and not into it, as if they're saying "Like this?" through their forced smiles. Lots of Caesar haircuts. Not enough photos of guys holding up their cocks while wearing boxing gloves -- only one. There is a list of Hot New Web Sites made to look like an classic Mac OS window. None of the websites have proper domain names. Half of them are msn communities. One of them is on webtv: Todd's Erotic Wrestling Gallery. I assume none of them work nowadays.

I am now flipping through an old issue of Penthouse. One thing I am learning: the people who did pornos really dug Mac OS. There is a nude spread, in black and white with a few colored highlights, where half the page will have a butt and some cowboy boots, and below it a quote from Homer or William Blake. I don't think you can find that on pornhubs...can you? There's a comic about space lesbians having sex and stabbing aliens. It looks kinda 2000 AD. There is a review of Matthew Sweet's "Altered Beast" that mentions the video game but doesn't mention anime so it's worthless. There is an ad for Franklin Mint commemorative plates featuring dogs. I would buy those plates. And the final page advertises next month's issue. Its lead: The Hottest Women in America, featuring Hillary Rodham Clinton. Also some stories about the evils of industrial fishing and maintaining wood on a porno set.

Playboy gave Paris is Burning three Playboy bunnies out of four. Defending Your Life only got 2. Oliver Stone's Doors movie: four stars. Wilson Phillips, MC Hammer, Kenny G, and Hank Williams Jr won rock, r&b, jazz, and country albums of the year, respectively. Wow! There is a 20 questions with Whitney Houston, who claimed her horny level varied depending on the fullness of the moon. She also liked Public Enemy and admired Farrakhan. I am learning so much from this 25 year old issue of Playboy Magazine.

Anyway I was going to post this thread to shame me into finishing a bad idea game but instead it became a bad idea review of old porno mags. Please, if you have old pornos...tell me about them.

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Digital actress Laura, Jr. will be the only character who has never been horny, because she is 100% digital DNA.

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When asked: “arcade sequence action y/n”...

There will be an action sequence. The game will prompt you to open a separate exe and you'll have to play through a snowmobile sequence. When it's over you will return to the main game, and you better not lie about having cleared the snowmobile sequence. If you violate the honor rule you ruin things for everybody!

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Someone comments with: “Hypercard is an aesthetic we should all seek to return to, IMO.”

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10/28/16

There's a Hypercard framework for Ren'py. I thought I'd finally use it for this. Plus Jimmy Maher's been writing about Hypercard lately, which made me want to finally play the Manhole...but instead of doing that I decided "Let's spend the weekend making Hypercard game."

I don't know how anyone has the patience for sprite work. It is too damn hard. Everything has to be so exact! Unless you don't give a shit. I generally do not give a shit. I will just plop lines down anywhere. I can always fix them easily later! But if you only got a few dozen dots you better slap those dots down in the right spots, otherwise shit looks all wrong.

The stuff I've worked up so far looks all wrong but it's still fun to mess around with. I do not know if I have it in me to keep going like this -- I may have to go back to cutting up porno mags -- but it's been fun.

That's right. This game is copyrighted. Back off, software pirates!!

I stole this logo from somewhere, right? Is the Tri-Ace logo like this? Some album cover? What ever. It took 10 minutes. It's done.

I woke up and decided player character Laura is going to spend the whole game locked out of her apartment in her bathrobe. She might run into other digital actress Lauras. They won't be wearing bathrobes. This will allow me to reuse the same faces over and over but I can justify it by pretending I'm clever.

I'll get her eyebrows and everything else right sooner or later.

There will definitely be a Kenji Eno like-a-look in this software. He had a very good face.

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10/29/16

Oh God the main reason I posted another reply was cuz I meant to link to this imgur gallery and I forgot to do it. I love it so much. I want this guy to add my stuff to it.

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11/4/16

My Kenji Eno tribute gamesoft is the only thing keeping me going at the moment. I'm feeling pretty good about it, even though it's currently nothing but character sprites and background art and a few lines of placeholder dialogue in Ren'py.

Kenji Eno is hard to draw. I gotta fix up his suit. It's all wrong. His face...I dunno, maybe it's close enough? I have always loved his face. I have always loved Kenji Eno. Earlier today I finally listened to the Hinge Problems ep about Kenji Eno. I downloaded it years ago, and I have put off listening to it...for years. It was fun to listen to. But I also think Kenji Eno got the short end of the stick on there. I think Kenji Eno is a few tiers above Tommy Wiseau. I think if he kept living and people kept giving him money to make games he woulda finally hit a target. Maybe not the one he was aiming at, but he woulda hit eventually. Imagine how great games would be if we had a dozen Kenji Enos?

One of the things I learned from doing google-image-search "kenji eno" is that he wasn't always a fat dude. He was pretty slim by the end. He was kinda handsome! It made me feel bad about drawing King-Sized Kenji Eno...but that's my Kenji Eno, and he's dead so he can't stop me from doing it.

This is player character Laura, taking a shower. I deleted the shower lines. They were not to my satisfaction. A lot of it is not to my satisfaction. But trust me: she is taking a shower. That is a Kenji Eno thing, showers. That was a 20th century thing. People would pay money to watch ladies take showers in movies! Isn't that crazy? Should probably fix her shoulder. Maybe the bridge of her nose.

I think I once read something about Daniel Clowes being the sweatiest cartoonist of all times and I thought "No way. I am going to take his place. I'm already 70% of the way there." And I promise you all: everything I ever do is going to have a ton of sweat.

So M.C. Laura has an apartment where she showers. That means it's not at all gratuitous! It's all good! She gets locked out of that apartment soon after this. Maybe after she picks up that skull from the potted plant. Maybe you go back in there later and crack that safe.

I thought maybe this would be a young Laura who joined the D Navy but she doesn't look young enough. Do they give you cleavers in the navy? To chop potatoes? Maybe they should. I will add waves to the ocean later. Maybe you will climb that lighthouse. Maybe Kenji Eno is up there. Who fuckin knows! It's all a mystery...

I think Navy Laura MAY be cute and may be a bit too generic...but that may mean she is my personal character find of 2016. in this version she has a :GENKI: emote on her hat...but she is lacking the outlining on her tights. Pixel art is hard, and for suckers. Never do it!

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11/11/16

It's been hard to muster the enthusiasms to work on this or anything else, but I finished a background and another character, so I figured I would post it.

The background is a basement, and drawing a basement made me feel depressed, but then I got to fill in the pictures on the TVs. That made me feel better. I just wanted to draw some TVs.

The game now involves a cult. This Laura started off as a cult member. She may still be. She had the masquerade mask but she was topless, covered in paint, and really hairy, with a padlock piercing her left nipple and a skunk fur stole wrapped around her neck. It was a confused design and the more I worked on it the worse I felt about it, so I said fuck it, she's still a drunk and maybe she's still in the cult but she's also a digital actress who needs to blow off steam after shooting a period picture in uncomfortable costume. Which she wore home. To her basement. With all its TVs. Yeah, maybe this needs work.

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11/13/16

Someone says: “Hypercard is an aesthetic we should all seek to return to, IMO.”

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11/15/16

LET ME TOUCH YOU, DADDEH

Big Laura: Cyber~Lipqueen Edition.

I thought Laura would live in a cyber version of Philip Marlowe's apartment building from Altman's the Long Goodbye, but I got tired of trying to draw shit good so I said "LET'S JUST DRAW WHATEVER AND FILL UP SPACE WITH GRAFFITI AFTERWARDS." Yes, that is a graffito tag depicting a disembodied cartoon Laura head shouting "I'M GAY!", and if you click on it you will be able to modify it so it says "I'M SO GAY!"...but only if you win the lotto first, and use the winnings to buy a cyber-marker that lets you draw on the one-hundred percent digital walls of Miami South: The New Hollywood.

Gonna get Genki on the Moon.

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11/18/16

Hey every body it's a . . .

. . . Friday . . !

Don't hesitate to say "FUCK YOU" to any one who ticks you off...unless it's me. I didn't mean to piss you off, I swear.

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11/20/16

... After the election I was feeling really low and wondering if I should even bother making anything but now I think I gotta keep going...I gotta get really :genki:

… Last night I went to a screening of Blue Velvet. The experience was kinda awful -- it was in a cafeteria where they projected the Blu-Ray onto a big screen so MAYBE it's not a real-deal screening, the place was jam-packed, and almost everyone there was normal and attractive and on a date, which seemed really weird to me? Like, none of those squares were gonna go home and engage in real sickie sex. I don't think you should take a date to that movie unless one of you is gonna do some consensual face-punching after the fact.

But anyway, I saw Blue Velvet, and it had Laura Dern, who is a wonderful actress. Have you ever watched Enlightened? That was a fantastic television program. Maybe the last new program I watched and truly enjoyed. I mourned its death, which is something I haven't done for a TV program since I was a child. I highly recommend watching that show. But this Blue Velvet audience, they laughed a lot at Laura Dern, which upset me. I think she did a fine job. I also think maybe she was the inspiration for Laura. I haven't see Wild at Heart yet, but I think there's a 50/50 chance Kenji Eno bought a laserdisc player just so he could beat off to Laura Dern banging Nic Cage at the highest possible home video quality available in the early 90's. And even if she wasn't Kenji Eno's Laura I think she might be my Laura. Way skinnier, but she's my Laura. So if I ever get sued by the Eno estate let's submit this shit as evidence: Diane Ladd's daughter was my muse, not that Japanese weirdo.

Over the weekend I drew a gas station. It is also a diner. You ever write up a list of your top 10 gamesoft? I've done that a few times, but I don't think I've ever put Sam & Max Hit the Road on mine, even though I'm sure I've spent my entire life pining for that kinda road trip experience. I've spent so much of my life in a car, but most of the time I wasn't going anyplace fun. I wasn't going to Stuckey's, or Waffle House, or miniature golf, or some kind of mysterious cavern. And it's unlikely I'll ever get to go on a crazy road trip at this point in my life. So I think this game is going to be a game about hitting the road and, maybe, having a good time. It's going to be the game I wish FF15 was. I played that FF15 demo today -- it fuckin blew. D3 might blow ass but at least it won't be 90 hours long. I respect your time. I respect you.

I'm still not sure if alcoholic, adversarial Laura is going to be the cult member who takes over your apartment, or if you can hit the road with her...but I like her, even though I'm having the hardest time drawing her. I've spent the last month or so reading Gilbert Hernandez comics, because they bring me great comfort and I'm pretty sure he's the greatest living cartoonist (and possibly artist). I am now aware that I nicked so many concepts of this game from him, and it's probably more of a Beto tribute game than an Eno tribute game but in the end...above all...it's a tribute to me, and select button, all the girls I've loved before.

I recently re-read that 1up interview with Eno. It's a very good interview and I recommend looking it up on google cache, even though a few pages are missing from it. He mentioned that he added a story to D at the last minute, and that made me feel a bit better about how I'm approaching this game. I thought I was probably lying to myself, thinking that I can just generate assets and throw them together later and have a game...but fuck, if my boy Kenji could do it, why can't I? Why can't all of us. Let's all make games, cuz games suck and they could be so much better.

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11/27/16

No one's bad enough to endure 9 hours of D3, never mind 90! No one's bad enough! Believe it! Because D3 asks Tough Questions and forces the player to make Hard Choices! D3 is now FULL BLOWN GAMES-AS-ART because now it has...A MORALITY SYSTEM.

"How far will you go to get juice?" -- the tagline to "Juice (2031 Remake)" starring Laura, Jr. and Jermaine "Huggy" Hopkins IV.

Laura is a digital actress. She was designed for the screen, not for the streets. She's got a lotta learning to do now that she's locked out of her apartment with no money, no shoes...and no scruples! In this scene Laura has wandered into a convenience store only to find its clerk is asleep on the job. That means no one can stop you but you! Click on the cigs, the booze, the rubbers, or the raccoon...take whatever you want! But choose carefully, because you can only carry one item at a time -- remember, you're a damp actress with no pockets, and I'm an inept programmer who doesn't know how to properly implement an inventory system. I'll figure it out eventually, but for now let's all agree that my limitations are inspiring great art.

I am proud of the condoms, so here they are, zoomed in but not blown up. Don't blow up condoms before wearing them. It's a terrible idea! The condoms are an homage to Leisure Suit Larry, which is a horrible game that I think I might love? I played it for the first time a few years ago. I've thought about it nearly every day since. The scene where Larry tries to buy condoms is really, really racist. Does referencing it make me racist, too? Probably, so let's keep this magnum-sized condom art a select butt exclusive "easter egg".

I'm also proud of these cigarette boxes. I don't smoke, but I'd start if the boxes looked this cooł. I'd totally take money from Tobacco of any size if they wanted to make a Laura Boy brand -- I'm ready to sell out, and you can't judge me.

There are two Kids in this game. Here is Kid Lotto. You can visit him and play games of chance. Or you can kick his ass, cuz he's a fuckin tiny and you're way stronger than him. What's stopping you? NOTHING.

The other kid is Kid Blotto. He's an alcoholic and you can beat him up too, but it'll probably be really depressing and he'll probably puke on you. I haven't drawn him/her yet.

The following image was presented in a blurry fashion, using the site’s SFW tools...

I am blurring this behind spoiler text, cuz it's got bare lady boobs -- I want to make sure this thread is "work safe", even though it's got XXX PORNO PARODY in the title. I should maybe spoiler blur this too, because it'll be a shocking swerve when it's revealed that the leader of the cult that takes over Laura's apartment is ALSO the alcoholic masquerade ball Laura seen previously on this page...! Fuck!

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12/8/16

... Last week my tablet died, which slowed down my productivity. I couldn't easily draw pictures! Which may be for the best. Maybe if you're trying to make a video game you should focus on the game aspect. So I have spent a lot of time thinking about how to make this an interesting video game...a lot of wasted time, cuz I have no fuckin clue. But I did draw more pictures, I composed some music, and wrote a bunch of words.

I'm going to play Unlimited SaGa this weekend. I bet I can learn something from that. I bet D3 could be an unofficial sequel to a Kawazu and Eno game. I'm that confident.

While daydreaming about playing games I thought "Maybe Laura D. will wander Miami South: The NEW Hollywood in her bare feet, and she will have to rest occasionally, cuz her feet get so bloody and sore. She cannot wear shoes, because she is 100% digital, and her DNA lock keeps her from wearing tacky footwear such as sandals, or socks with sandals." And maybe I'd draw her feet, being all bloody and sore? But fuck, feet are the worst. No offense to anyone who's really into feet -- I am convinced foot fetishists are very focused, productive people and I'm deeply jealous of them -- but at a young age my older sister shamed me for my Fred Flintstone-looking feet, and I also read a lot of Rob Liefeld comics around the same time, so I have zero tolerance for feet. I believe they are ugly and also very hard to draw. But feet are an important part of the human anatomy and if you wanna make decent art you can't really avoid them. So I drew a few feet. You can see one of them here. Unlike most of the art I've posted so far I doubt I will ever revise this, cuz drawing feet is the worst.

I decided The Lauras would be pure digital beauty, except for their feet. Maybe that wasn't my Kenji Eno's thing. Maybe I'm projecting there. Maybe it's beautiful if your second toe is longer than your big toe? Please tell me this is the case, cuz I want to feel better about my feet.

HERE'S A LIST OF TOP 5 WORST THINGS TO DRAW:

1) Cars, except for those cute Choro-Q style cars Toriyama always drew in Dr. Slump. Those rank #6, cuz they're hard but maybe worth the effort. 2) Feet. 3) Ladies. I can't imagine being a dude or a lady drawing their horny ideal all day. Wouldn't that drive you crazy? How do you not spend all day pounding off rather than drawing? I avoided drawing ladies for this very reason. Well, that and cuz I bet my mom wouldn't approve of me drawing super hot babes. I'm getting over that now. D3 is all hot babes, all the time. No one can stop me! 4-5) I dunno, I forgot what the rest of the list was gonna be. Probably one body part or another -- humans are gross, and awful.

Miami South: The NEW Hollywood is where the world goes to make entertainment. Some of the entertainment is wholesome, some ain't...but a lot of it straddles the line between kid-friendly and the kinda shit your sickie dad would buy on clips4sale. This cop Laura who stars in CD-ROM video films where she somehow always ends up in her own handcuffs...she is a peek into the future of Pixar and such. Believe it. Furtopia...

Was Furtopia the name of that furry Pixar movie? I'm too lazy to google it. Either way...we all gonna see dads and moms covertly pounding off in the theater to Pixar movies within the next decade. I'm sure of it.

This is Ton Hardcore. She is the #1 character find of the 21st century, even though she's a total knockoff of Dump Matsumoto. Dump is the coolest of the pro-wrestlers. On the Discord I am StanHansen, but only because I was too chickenshit to take the name "DumpMatusmoto", because she was so tough and bad ass and beautiful.

A few years ago I wrote a screenplay featuring my tough gal Ton Hardcore. It was titled "Hooker #1". In the opening scene she butt-fucked a billionaire so hard he cried and gold coins fell from the pockets of his pajamas. There probably won't be any butt-fucking in D3, but if any of you guys got the Hollywood hook-up I have a script for the 2023 Pixar project ready to go.

Someday I would like to make a game about a pro-wrestler. One that focuses more on surviving on the road than performing in the ring. D3 may end up being that game. I bet being a digital actress ain't much different from being a pro-wrestler.

Ton Hardcore is my true Laura. She is going to be in everything I do. She's on my joystick. If you ever go to a FG tourney in the Northeast of the USA I will show you her looking cool, and in color, and bloody, cuz she's on my joystick. She's #1.

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12/15/16

A discussion about wrestling game emerges and someone says: “Still waiting for the 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand of wrestling games.” Def Jam Fight for New York is brought up, and then I mention my favorite guilty pleasure for the Xbox 360, Def Jam Icon…

I played the demo for Def Jam Icon way back when. I paid it no regard, because it was not by AKI. Perhaps that was unfair of me, but I believe hip hop and rapping is very cool, but not as cool as full-blown pro-wrestling....and the best pro-wrestling was delivered by AKI on the Nintendo 64.

I think AKI is the most successful b-tier late 90's j-gamedev that isn't From. Hell, maybe they are more successful. Demon's Souls is probably my favorite game of the last decade (it's almost January 2017, and GOD HAND came out in October 2006, so please do not debate this -- Demon's Souls is the best), but given the choice...I think I'd rather make a Style Savvy game than a Souls game. Though a cross between both...that's a dream game, right there.

I've spent most of the last week thinking about video-games, and trying to program them. I think the visual novel is bad. I can count the VNs I've enjoyed on one hand. I would like to make a video-game that I would enjoy, and that's probably a bad thing to think about. I have high standards! So maybe I should just settle for making a visual novel. But sometimes...you gotta believe. Sometimes you gotta go Kawazu. Sometimes you gotta try to program a board-game in Ren'py despite your incompetence as a programmer/gamedev.

The drawing above is from a diner scene. I think Laura D. will occasionally "take a load off", and visit a diner with the companion of your choosing. That is my 21st century "power fantasy", going to a diner with another human being. Just eating food, or having a drink, and talking about things. That is something I haven't done in the longest time, and can't imagine ever doing in the future. That is what DDD is shaping up to be. Lots of eating, and driving, in an America that never existed.

That Laura D. will not be in the final DDD. I like that drawing, but it's "off-model" as they say in the biz. On-model Laura D. isn't quite as chibi. She's leaner. Colder. She's a digital actress and she really isn't that interested in what anyone else is saying.

She's totally cool and may look more like this.

That image will also not appear in the final game, because I fuckin hate how static it looks, and how the feet are probably all wrong, and how there are no cars in that parking lot. Again, cars are almost as bad as feet, but maybe not as bad as horses. Horses are a fucking bitch to draw.

The Sailor, whose name hasn't been decided on yet, should be eating French fries but uh...I see I forgot to draw the French fries. Pretend she is a sulky teen who ordered only fries at D's diner. Every character will order a different food! You will learn so much about Laura D's companions at the diner, and so much of it will come form what they eat.

In the past I would have ordered a grilled cheese and fries at a diner. Now? Who the hell knows. I try to avoid having a good time. I try to avoid diners.

Earlier today I was drawing billboards. I fuckin love drawing billboards. I now love spirtework, cuz I can cut and paste shit and no one can shame me for it, cuz if you don't recycle shit video-games don't work. I liked how this image came out after cutting, pasting, and mirroring. I'd get it tattooed on my soul. On your soul. I'd make it my select-button avatar if the site still supported super big ass avatars. It's 100%

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