#these would NOT work in real life and yet I’m sat thinking like 🥹🥹🥹🥹 it would be so romantic 🥹🥹🥹
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realistically speaking, experiencing love the way it’s portrayed in books and tv shows would probably be traumatic but sometimes a bitch is delusional
#me. I’m bitch#I’m watching the night agent and like being on the run hiding from the law would probs be a horrifying experience#but why do they make it look so romantic djdjsjsjs#also just in general like enemies to lovers . one bed trope. hurt/comfort#these would NOT work in real life and yet I’m sat thinking like 🥹🥹🥹🥹 it would be so romantic 🥹🥹🥹#girl you’d cry and run away in any of those situations#rahma’s rambles
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Hello my dearest rhythm, I am back with my (still messy) thoughts on FPS part 2 🥹
First of all, i had to reread it cuz the first time that i saw it was after a day (or days) of hectic training when i just wanted to shut off my brain but i saw that u updated and my whole world sTOPPED, i swear i held my breath and thought i was hallucinating the new part 😭 i’ve been waiting for it for so long and it’s definitely worth it 🥹😭
I might babble a lot about it so if anyone hasn’t read it, pls don’t read this cuz it will have spoilers 😭
I WAS NOT PREPARED TO EXPERIENCE THE CONFLICT IN HIS HEAD WHEN THE REVEAL HAPPENED 😭😭😭😭😭 literally, i was holding my breath,, i wanted to cry too 🥹 MY BABIES, why should the world make them meet like that 😭 they just wanted to love and be loved huhu i hate u (i love u so much pls i know it hurt u too). Knowing everything that was going on in his head, gosh, I’m so crushed. I want to hold him and tell him it’s okay because he didn’t know it was her 😭 akshjsdjjdskbsjsjx
“The fact that you wouldn’t take his life puzzled him. How could you not want him dead? After all that had transpired, why wouldn’t you?” ——BECAUSE I LOVE YOU GOD DAMMIT 😭🤕🥹
“and if you’d been fine with it, he wanted to ask you to move in with him.” —nO WAIT STOP PLS,😭 i’m beyond wrecked and i haven’t even gone thru half of the story yet.
The flashback to their first date 🥺🥺🥺 i wanna scream. Knowing how both of their lives were filled with chaos, them being able to find peace and comfort with each other is just sooooo wholesome. WHICH HURTS EVEN MORE WHEN I REALIZE ITS JUST A FLASHBACK——brb gonna go sob in a corner. “If I tried to kiss you… would you let me?”——😭😭😭😭😭i love love love how they get so spontaneous and relaxed with each other. I love how you wrote about it between the lines of their stressfully calculated and rigid line of work 🥹
3 freakin’ months of no contact 😭 i wonder what happened to MC then. Although you did write a bit about her forfeiting her mission and also, technically, her spot in the Guild, I wonder what she was thinking after everything. Three months is a (kind of) long time, and I guess like Chris, she would’ve been wondering all of her what-if’s. Did she ever think about contacting him too? Did she ever considered his side of the story? idk i’m just hurting with them at this point.
—i’m gonna skip the reunion but just know that i screamed and held my breath and punched the wall and banged my head on the desk and— yeah
The honesty and vulnerability between them is just so pure. The way they both pined for normalcy with each other is just *chef’s kiss* 🤍 i love them so much, it hurts how much shit they went thru even before they met 🥺 i’m not gonna spoil much about the rest of the story but i just want you to know that i loooove how you wrote them. Their stories feel so real to me and their emotions were very well conveyed. I love how the story went and, to be honest, i don’t think i mind the ending being open as much as I initially thought. (tho i wouldn’t complain if ur brain lizard decides otherwise— 👀)
Aaaahck my babies 🤍🖤 thank you for publishing this new part!! I hope you have a really nice day :> hugs!!
~🍓
plssss this is so detailed kjfhsdjfshfdkijsjikd
that whole first scene recounting the reveal from his POV hurt me more than you can imagine. every time i sat down to write this story i felt like my heart was being squeezed (which was exactly what i was looking for sdjfhskdfh). Chris really just wanted to have that bit of peace he had with his girlfriend and it was ripped away from him ))):
as for what happened on the MC's side during those three months... i'm sure she almost called him several times, but, just like Chris, i don't think she was ready to face him. she had hurt him and tried to kill him (before she knew it was him, ofc), so she probably had to process all that, plus the fact that she couldn't finish her mission at all (which i'm sure was a whole different problem in itself). essentially, both her heart and her pride was hurt, and, honestly, if she hadn't heard those people talking about picking up her failed mission, i feel like she wouldn't have reached out at all (or at least not that "soon").
everything that happened at Chris' flat after they met again was very therapeutic to write for some reason??? idk, i feel like i was able to let a lot of feelings out writing this story in general, so i'm glad some of those feelings were conveyed well.
i really wanted to leave the ending a bit open so the reader could interpret what could happen next. they could run away together, one of them could retire, Chris could try to get the Kims to pardon her, or (for those that want a bit more angst) maybe you can even imagine she is deceiving him still, trying to fulfil her goal and that's why she came back... the possibilities are endless atp haha. all i know for sure is that i wanted to end this story with them together, so i did!
thank you for reading this, and for your thorough feedback. i'm glad you liked it💜💜💜
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You carefully shifted so you could look up at Chris, who was fast asleep yet his arms were still wrapped around you tightly and securely. Like he was still protecting you from the world and nothing, not even sleep, would stop him.
What a way to wake up 🥰
“Stay there I’ve got some things that should help,” you said, you moved to get out of bed but Chris grabbed your arm to stop you. “I’m fine, just stay here a little while longer” he said pulling you back into his embrace.
Everything for the patient 😌
You chuckled to yourself as you stepped back inside your room, closing the door behind you and leaning back against it. You cupped your cheeks with your hands smiling and laughing to yourself before stepping away to finish getting ready.
Damn to have a moment like this in real life
“Honestly sometimes I think it would just be easier if us two were together because we’d have our shit together like that” Tommi said snapping her fingers, making you laugh out loud and shake your head. “True but unfortunately we both favour the male of the species,” you said with a dramatic sigh.
Tragic
“Those nausea episodes I’ve been having have been panic attacks, I had one last night while we were in bed and Chris sat with me and talked me through it, said he’s suffered from anxiety in the past” you explained. Tommi sat back in her seat, shaking her head in disbelief “Wow… just wow��� I would never have expected him to be like that at all”
A very positive surprise for everyone!
Ari scoffed “What kind of question is that? I’m always hungry” he said making Chris laugh “let's go back to the hotel though since we get to eat free there”
So valid Ari haha
“His name is Dan, works in finance so looks good in a suit” Tommi winked not affected by Ari’s charm. “Interesting, you know sportsmen have to wear suits a lot and I look great in a three-piece” he winked back. “Shame I don’t like players, both professionally and romantically” Tommi grinned.
Their energy is impeccable 👏🏻
“This lunch is going to be entertaining” Chris grinned as he held out his hand to help you down from your stool. You snorted with laughter “You could say that again, I think Ari might have finally met his match” you said quietly as you followed after the pair. “I don’t think I ever seen anyone match Ari” he commented. You hummed leaning in closer to him “Same with Tommi”
Wow and to witness this first hand, amazing
“Are you sure the engagement is serious? Can’t help but think these two are a perfect match” Chris admitted.
😅😅😅
Chris squeezed your knee gently to get you looking back at him “You’ll get it, if anyone deserves it, it’s you” he said softly.
🥹🥹🥹
Even in the chaos of it all, it took no time at all for Chris to pick you out in the crowd. He’d pushed his way through, greeting and hugging people as he went until he found you. You jumped up with an excited smile on your face and hugged him tightly. Chris took advantage of the crowd around him to press a quick kiss on top of your head because as soon as the whistle blew Chris only wanted to see you.
That is so cute 🥹🥰
A lot of the team, at least the sociable ones aka not Curtis, were going around and taking photos with the fans who had turned up.
The comment about Curtis cracked me up 😂
“Well I know having you there helps” you admitted making Chris smile.
🥰🥰🥰
Boston Bears: Off-Limits - Rugby Player!Chris x Reader (Part 8)
Summary: After your night with Chris, you catch up with Tommi. Your lunch get crashed by two rugby players, and you reassure Chris that the Bears deserve to win the championship
Word Count: 5.8k
Warnings: Fluff! Light Angst! Talk of Anxiety!
Rugby Explained
Dividers by Me!
Series Masterlist / Masterlist
Chapter 8
You felt warm all over when you slowly woke. It felt like the blinds had been left open and the sun was streaming in, bathing your body in warmth but when you opened your eyes the room was still dark. It didn’t take long for you to realise where the warmth was coming from and you couldn’t fight the smile that grew on your lips.
You carefully shifted so you could look up at Chris, who was fast asleep yet his arms were still wrapped around you tightly and securely. Like he was still protecting you from the world and nothing, not even sleep, would stop him.
You nibbled your lip as you studied his peaceful face, the small amount of swelling he had was almost gone. In its place were some pretty nasty-looking bruises. The butterfly strips on his brow had pealed slightly so you carefully reached up to smooth them back down until you could properly reapply them. You sighed as you dropped your hand back to his chest and studied the bruises hoping they looked worse than they were. Guilt coursed through you, you were the reason that Chris got hurt yet part of you melted when you remembered it was to protect you. He took the harder hits to protect you from the gut-deep cuts that Bryce wanted to inflict.
Your fingers began to loosely trace over Chris’ many tattoos that littered his chest, ones that you wouldn’t know existed underneath his rugby jersey. You were one of the rare few who knew they did and got close enough to touch them. Your mind began replaying the events of last night and it felt different to all the other times you’ve recalled what happened to you. There was still a stab of pain in your heart but it felt dulled, like something was standing in the way taking the blow for you. There was a weight off your shoulders that you hadn’t realised was there in the first place. You felt well rested too, despite the fact you woke up in the middle of the night.
When Chris shifted underneath you, you stopped not wanting to wake him before you were ready. Despite your best efforts, he continued to stir letting out a small yawn as he stretched.
“Mornin’” he murmured as he slowly opened his eyes.
“Morning, sorry if I woke you” you apologised.
Chris shook his head and started running his fingers up and down your bare arm “You didn’t” he said softly “Did you sleep well?”
“Yeah, I did, thank you” You nodded with a smile “did you?”
Chris nodded before running his hand down his face only to wince, clearly forgetting the bruises on his face.
“Tender?” you asked sitting up slightly.
Chris nodded again “Just a bit” he admitted still wincing slightly.
“Stay there I’ve got some things that should help,” you said, you moved to get out of bed but Chris grabbed your arm to stop you.
“I’m fine, just stay here a little while longer” he said pulling you back into his embrace.
“Fine but I would be a bad medic if I let you leave without some more treatment” you relented as you rested your head back on his chest.
Chris chuckled softly “I wouldn’t expect anything less, have you got any plans today before we jet off later tonight?”
You nodded your head “I’m meeting Tommi later to catch up, I’ve missed having her around even if Johnny has been a good replacement friend” you told him “What about you?”
Chris shrugged “Nothing, might just hang with some of the guys, none of us has friends or anything over here so we’ll all be killing time, got any suggestions for what we could do?”
“Not really, just stay out of trouble I guess” you smirked.
“I can’t promise you anything” he smirked back.
The two of you remained relaxed in bed for a while longer before you eventually got up and ready for the day. You re-applied the butterfly strips to the cut on his brow and some cream to his other bruises to help them heal quicker.
When it was time for him to head back to his own room, you followed him to the door to say goodbye to him. However, when he opened the door he froze, you peered around his shoulder and spotted Curtis who must have been walking past to get to his room.
“Hey, just getting these fixed up” Chris explained pointing to his cuts when Curtis arched a curious brow.
Curtis nodded once “right”
“Must have opened them in my sleep, you should see my room it's a blood bath” Chris continued starting to ramble.
You shut him up by slyly pinching him in the side. He jolted slightly but covered it up by stepping out of your room and turning back around to face you “Thanks doc, see you later”
“See you later, go steady Evans,” you said biting back a smile at how flustered he was, you then glanced back at Curtis who was still just watching with an unreadable expression “Need anything from me Curtis?” you asked.
He just shook his head tightly before heading back off in the direction he was going. Chris shot you a look that said ‘That was close’ before he too went on his way. You chuckled to yourself as you stepped back inside your room, closing the door behind you and leaning back against it. You cupped your cheeks with your hands smiling and laughing to yourself before stepping away to finish getting ready.
A short while later you were making your way down to the hotel bar to meet Tommi. You spotted her almost immediately as she sat at the bar with a fruity-looking drink in her red floral sundress. You had always been slightly envious of Tommi, she always looked stunning, not in a model kind of way, in that girl next door kind of way. You were happy and confident in your own body but there were times you wished you didn’t have a slightly bulky athletic build and were softer.
A smile broke out on her face when she spotted you, letting out an excited squeak as she jumped down from the stool and ran over to you giving you the tightest hug ever.
“I’ve missed you so much!” she grinned as she hugged you.
“I missed you too” you smiled, not realising how much you had missed her hugs.
When she finally pulled back you both moved to sit down at the bar, Tommi flagging the bartender as she took a deep sip of her drink.
“Cocktails this early in the morning?” you smirked.
Tommi snorted as she shook her head “Just a mocktail, but god I wish it was with all the wedding planning?”
You tilted your head “Oh how is all that going?” you asked before putting in your own order for a mocktail.
“It feels like 1 step forward and 5 steps back at the moment” Tommi sighed her shoulders drooping “Dan’s great but it just seems impossible to get him to help at the moment because he’s so busy”
You listened as Tommi continued to vent about the stresses of wedding planning, a lot of it you had already heard from previous Facetime calls but you knew she needed this in-person venting time and you were more than happy to offer your listening ears.
“Honestly sometimes I think it would just be easier if us two were together because we’d have our shit together like that” Tommi said snapping her fingers, making you laugh out loud and shake your head.
“True but unfortunately we both favour the male of the species,” you said with a dramatic sigh.
“Oh speaking of which, how is all that going?” Tommi asked, her face turning more serious like she was expecting and preparing to go kick some ass.
“Good, really good actually, something did happen yesterday though” you admitted.
“What did he do?”
“Did you watch the match yesterday?” you took a sip of your drink as Tommi shook her head “Well I don’t know exactly what Bryce said on the pitch and I don’t think I want to know either but he said some shit about me to Chris and Chris tactically beat him up”
Tommi’s eyes went wide “shit”
You nodded your head “shit exactly”
“What happened after? Did your dad find out? Are you okay? Why did you let me rant on about my wedding when this shit has been happening!” Tommi rambled.
You chuckled warmly “I’m fine and no my dad is none the wiser, when he asked Chris lied and said Bryce has been talking shit about his best mate Jensen” you explained “But when we got back to the hotel Chris did want to know what had gone on between me and Bryce”
Tommi winced sympathetically “And did you tell him?”
You took a deep breath and nodded your head “Yeah and it was tough but it went well” you admitted.
“Really? That’s good” Tommi hummed her face still full of concern.
“Yeah, and I told him everything, how me and Bryce got together, how it ended and how it made me feel like spoilt goods and how I was scared that he’d feel just as disgusted as I feel, felt about myself” you breathed out.
Tommi’s face crumbled as you admitted how you felt “You felt like spoilt goods? god no you should never feel like that, why didn’t you say? You are not spoilt goods in any way shape or form, you’re still my sexy best friend” she said as she jumped off her chair and quickly enveloped you in a tight hug.
You let out a watery chuckle as you hugged her back “I know that now” you said softly “and I’m sorry I never told you that, honestly I don’t think I really knew that was how I felt until last night”
“And how did Chris take that?” she asked as she returned to her seat, running her fingers under her eyes to wipe away stray tears.
“He was amazing” you sighed dreamily “It was like he picked all the pieces of me up and hugged me back together, he promised that he would never lie and never has lied about how much he enjoys our time together he said I was like a drug he didn’t want to quit”
Tommi blinked a couple of times “Wow” she muttered.
“And he helped me when I had a panic attack later on”
Tommi’s eyes widened “You had a panic attack!” she exclaimed.
“Those nausea episodes I’ve been having have been panic attacks, I had one last night while we were in bed and Chris sat with me and talked me through it, said he’s suffered from anxiety in the past” you explained.
Tommi sat back in her seat, shaking her head in disbelief “Wow… just wow… I would never have expected him to be like that at all”
You chuckle “told you he was different” you smirked, Tommi just hummed in response, a look of disbelief on her face.
“I have to say sun all year round must be nice,” Ari said as he and Chris walked along the boardwalk.
Chris hummed and nodded his head as he breathed in the sea air. Despite Boston also being a coastal town, the air felt different in LA, it felt closer. It was something that he thought he’d find suffocating after a while. He wondered if you had felt the same. His mind drifted back to last night and everything that had happened, you had seemed much better this morning but he also knew how thoughts could linger. At least he knew that you had your best friend with you.
Ari cleared his throat quietly alerting Chris to the fact he was supposed to respond “So if you got offered a contract here you’d take it?” he asked.
Ari shook his head “No, firstly Langley is a dick” Ari started making Chris snort, he could say that again “Secondly I need to stay on the east coast”
Chris arched his brow “Why?”
Ari stuttered for a moment as if he hadn’t meant to say something and only just realised he did “Just my family is all there, wanna stay close… even if I do hate winter”
Chris nodded in understanding, he wouldn’t want to move anywhere else. He didn’t get to see his family as much as he wanted and that was living in the same state. Luckily the Bears don’t seem to want to trade him anytime soon. Ari’s family was down in New York, and as far as Chris knew he took any and all time off to fly down and visit, something he probably couldn’t do if he was further away
“Yeah we don’t get enough time as is without factoring in long-haul flights” Chris sighed “Any way you getting hungry?”
Ari scoffed “What kind of question is that? I’m always hungry” he said making Chris laugh “let's go back to the hotel though since we get to eat free there”
Chris tried not to nod too eagerly, hoping that maybe he’d bump into you again.
A short while later Chris and Ari had made their way back to the hotel, Chris trying to look chilled when he spotted you and your friend sitting at the bar. He was relieved to see and hear you laughing as you caught up.
“Hey, who’s that with Y/N?” Ari asked nudging Chris in the side subtly.
“That’s her friend, said her name was Tommi”
Ari hummed and nodded his head “Let’s ask if they want to join us” he said already walking over to them “Hey ladies”
“Ari” you grinned as he came to a stop next to you.
Chris watched as Ari gave you a quick smile back before turning his attention to Tommi who was equally checking him out “And who’s your friend?”
Tommi flashed Ari a winning smile that could rival his “Tommi” she said holding out her hand, pointedly showing off the engagement ring on her finger.
Chris failed to hold back the snort when Ari’s smile faltered slightly, you too had your fingers pressed to your lips to stop your laughter.
Ari quickly recovered and turned the charm back on “And who’s the lucky man?” he asked.
“His name is Dan, works in finance so looks good in a suit” Tommi winked not affected by Ari’s charm.
“Interesting, you know sportsmen have to wear suits a lot and I look great in a three-piece” he winked back.
“Shame I don’t like players, both professionally and romantically” Tommi grinned.
“I bet I can change-” Ari started before you interrupted.
“So what can we do for you?” you asked glancing up at the both of them.
“We’re getting lunch and wondered if you guys wanted to join us?” Chris explained.
“Sounds good, Tommi?” you nodded.
Tommi studied Ari for a moment before shrugging her shoulders “Why not” she then pointed at Ari “But if you hit on me one more time” she warned.
Ari puts his hand over his heart “I swear” he winked.
Chris watched as Tommi hopped off her stool and started walking off, Ari following closely behind. Neither of them seemed to notice that you and Chris were still standing by the bar.
“This lunch is going to be entertaining” Chris grinned as he held out his hand to help you down from your stool.
You snorted with laughter “You could say that again, I think Ari might have finally met his match” you said quietly as you followed after the pair.
Ari and Tommi had picked one of the booths, Ari just sliding into the spot next to Tommi leaving the other side open for you and Chris, not that Chris was complaining at all.
Chris slid in first so he was opposite Tommi, you slid in after him and just as you sat down he gently placed his hand on your knee earning a small smile. Ari then flagged down the waiter and your orders were quickly placed. Chris and Ari both opted for Chicken burgers, you ordered a cheeseburger which made both Chris and Ari groan enviously. Something which made Tommi slyly nibble her lip and glance at Ari. Tommi ordered a nice pasta dish with extra veggies.
“So Tommi what is that you do?” Ari asked, leaning his arm against the back of the booth, angling his body towards Tommi. Chris had a feeling that neither he nor you would say much during this meal.
“PR” Tommi answered.
Ari quirked a brow “for celebs?”
“Mostly, but anyone with a high profile really, politicians, CEOs” she began to list off.
“Sport stars?” Ari asked with a knowing look.
“Yes, but I’ve mostly worked with the MBA,” she said with her own pointed look.
“What kind of trouble can baseball players get into?” Chris asked, genuinely intrigued.
“I’d tell you but then I’d have to kill you” Tommi smirked,
Ari chuckled deeply “I like you, you sure you can’t leave LA?”
“Very very sure” she shot back.
“Shame” Ari grinned.
The food arrived soon after providing a reprieve from the back and forth between Ari and Tommi. Although Chris was thoroughly enjoying watching the two of them. It wasn’t often that Ari struck out with the ladies, yet despite a pretty big obstacle, Ari wasn’t put off. It wasn’t long until Ari was trying again although he seems to have changed tact.
“Is it true that most of the Hollywood couples are fake?” He asked sounding genuinely curious.
Tommi first shook her head, before pausing, shrugging her shoulders and then nodding “depends on the relationship” she answered “There definitely are real relationships, if they’re married it’s real because there’s no way we can fake a marriage, crazed fans will search for the license” Tommi explained “but all the buzz you see around costars and the chemistry a lot of the time its PR agents asking them to be cosy”
“Have you ever worked on a fake relationship?” Chris asked.
“A few times yeah, it’s better than clearing up someone’s mess” She nodded.
“Depending on the client,” you said knowingly.
“Yeah, there are some people who are difficult to work with, not because they’re rockstars who trash hotel rooms but because they don’t always understand that sometimes the best PR response is no response” Tommi shrugged.
Ari nodded his head in earnest “No point making it big news if it’s barely news to begin with” he agreed.
Tommi actually smiled warmly back at him for that “Exactly” she hummed, she was definitely warming up to Ari now.
It wasn’t long until the two of them monopolised the entire conversation leaving Chris and you just sat there watching the verbal tennis. Chris took the opportunity to rest his hand on your knee and lean in to whisper in your ear.
“I don’t think I ever seen anyone match Ari” he commented.
You hummed leaning in closer to him “Same with Tommi”
“Are you sure the engagement is serious? Can’t help but think these two are a perfect match” Chris admitted.
You let out a long quiet sigh, gazing over at Tommi who was scoffing at something Ari had said, Ari giving her a lopsided grin.
“Her and Dan are great together, I’ve never seen two people more in love, they’ve been my definition of a perfect relationship for as long as I can remember something I can only hope to achieve,” you said wistfully.
Chris squeezed your knee gently to get you looking back at him “You’ll get it, if anyone deserves it, it’s you” he said softly.
A warm smile graced your lips, your eyes seemed to brighten as you whispered “Thank you”
“What are you two whispering about” Ari called out, grabbing your attention.
“Just wondering whether we should split the two of you up” Chris answered without missing a beat.
“Don’t take away my new friend” Ari pouted, throwing his arm around Tommi's shoulder. She rolled her eyes at him but made no attempt to push his arm off.
“Uh, who said you could take my best friend?” You asked incredulously, brow arched.
“Sorry sweetheart, just the way the world works, you can’t deny something like this” he smirked.
You pointed over at him “Remember who it is that removes all your tape after a match” you said making both Chris and Ari wince.
The tape was a bitch to remove, especially if you had any form of body hair, you were usually pretty good at getting it off with minimal pain but Chris dreaded to think what it would be like if you had a vendetta. The scene from 40-year-old virgin came to mind.
“Guess we’ll just have to share” Ari winked.
You weren’t happy with that because it then became you and Tommi vs Ari. Not that Ari seemed to mind, he clearly found it very entertaining. Neither of you was actually annoyed at him either, it was impossible to be annoyed at Ari, he was too damn charismatic for that.
Chris just chuckled and sat back in his seat to watch the next round of verbal tennis play out. However, instead of switching his attention around, it was solely on you. He had been worried that the events of yesterday would still be weighing heavily on you and maybe some of it did but you seemed lighter. Lighter than Chris had ever seen you. Even before coming to LA. Your smile was warmer and your eyes brighter, you seemed more alive and it just made his heart sing. He had to resist the urge to grab you, kiss you deeply and drag you back to his room. If this was how you were now, he couldn’t wait to see you when you healed more.
The day after a match was usually spent recovering from both the match and any celebrations or commiserations that had been held that evening. Players would spend time with their families and loved ones since it was the only full day off they got during the season.
This weekend was no different. After the weekend in LA, the Bears only had one last match before playoffs started. They knew going into the match yesterday that a win would secure their place in the top four. The energy in the stadium was electric when they jogged onto the pitch. These kinds of matches were Chris’ favourite, it felt like it wasn’t just the fans in the stadium behind them, it felt like all of Boston.
The crowd were definitely the 16th man yesterday because the Bears absolutely obliterated their opponents. It was rare for a team to remain scoreless in a rugby match, but the Bears managed to prevent their opponents from scoring the entire 80 minutes, while their own score increased repeatedly. The game was effectively over at half time they were that far ahead.
The entire stadium erupted when the final whistle blew, the entire off-pitch staff and players ran onto the pitch to celebrate with the team. The crowds were singing and chanting and it felt like they had already won the championship. Even in the chaos of it all, it took no time at all for Chris to pick you out in the crowd. He’d pushed his way through, greeting and hugging people as he went until he found you. You jumped up with an excited smile on your face and hugged him tightly. Chris took advantage of the crowd around him to press a quick kiss on top of your head because as soon as the whistle blew Chris only wanted to see you.
The entire team and staff had celebrated late into the night leading to many people recovering from hangovers the next day. But it wasn’t just the after-effects of alcohol that was causing the air of uneasiness, it was the match everyone had gathered to watch.
The Bears had already secured their place in the top four but their position within the top four wouldn’t be decided until after the last match of the regular season today. With their bonus point win yesterday, they currently were 2nd in the league which would allow them a home game for their first playoff, but if the LA Lions won with bonus points too they would take 2nd place and push the Bears down in the 3rd spot. Needless to say following the match against the Lion last weekend, Chris was more desperate than ever for them to lose, and lose badly.
He had wanted to spend the entire day with you, either at his place or yours. He pictured waking up next to you and spending most of the morning in bed together as you recovered from the night before. But halfway through celebrating your dad had announced that the CEO had agreed to open up the stadium for the fans and team to watch the match on a big screen. Meaning Chris not only had to wake up alone this morning but didn’t get to celebrate with you alone last night.
As he walked into the stadium that afternoon he wondered whether that was why he felt so nervous about today’s match. He knew it was an important match because it could decide how well the playoffs went for the Bears and it was entirely out of their control. At least it seemed like he wasn’t the only one who felt nervous.
A lot of the team, at least the sociable ones aka not Curtis, were going around and taking photos with the fans who had turned up. They all had smiles plastered on their faces but Chis could tell some of the smiles were forced as they shrugged their shoulders and said ‘We’ll have to see’ to the numerous questions about if they thought the Lions would lose.
“Hey,” you said startling Chris.
“Oh hey,” he said, scratching the back of his neck as he turned around to face you “how you feeling?”
“Hangover-wise or pre-match wise?” you smirked with an arched brow.
Chris let out a huff of a laugh “Both I guess”
You let out a long sigh “Bit rough, but not as rough as Johnny looks” you said nodding over to Johnny who was wearing sunglasses despite the overcast weather “Match wise I don’t know”
“You don’t feel confident?” Chris asked hoping he didn’t sound as apprehensive as he did.
You shrug your shoulders “I honestly don’t know, the Washington Wolves have been on a good run the last few matches, normally I would bet against them when facing the Lions but with Byrce on a 2 match ban following his red we don’t know how well the team will cope without him so it could be pretty evenly matched”
“Some would say that’s the best kind of rugby” Chris points out.
“It definitely makes for an entertaining match but not when the score determines our playoff position” you sighed.
Chris scoffed “Thanks for reminding me, I’d nearly forgotten,” he said sarcastically.
You winced “Sorry, but you’ll be fine, we’re in the playoff regardless” you said putting your hand on his bicep reassuringly “Anyway I better let you go greet your adoring fans, here” you said passing him a sharpie.
Chris smiled as he took the sharpie, one of the things he’d forgotten in his prematch nerves “Thanks, I'll see you later”
Chris spent the next 30 or so minutes before the match kicked off going around and meeting the fans. The kids were always his favourite, they could ask him to do anything and he’d be powerless to say no. He did kinda wish he could listen to the pre-match analysis by the pundits but he’d have to go without.
Soon enough the stadium quietened down as everyone found their seats to watch the match. Chris sat down in his seat, Ari on his left and Jensen on his right. He couldn’t help but look over his shoulder looking for you. He spotted you almost instantly, even in the largest crowds he never seemed to have an issue finding you. It was like there was a beacon or that he had a sixth sense. You were sat next to your dad and the rest of the coaching staff, Andy sat on the other side of your dad both men talking with serious looks on their faces. You had been listening to what they were saying but caught Chris’ gaze and smiled warmly. Chris smiled back and took a deep breath as he turned back around ready to watch the game.
What followed was the longest 40 minutes of Chris’ life. Both teams were fighting hard and seemed to be mostly evenly matched but the Lions were the only ones on the scoreboard. The Wolves had crossed the try line multiple times, more than the Lions had but none of the tries were allowed much to Chris’ annoyance. The Lions had scored 3 tries too, if they scored one more they would get a bonus point win which would guarantee them a home semi-final instead of the Bears.
When the half-time whistle went Chris could feel his heart pounding in his chest in a way he recognised and didn’t like. He quietly excused himself and made his way inside.
In no time at all he was sat in his cubby in the team’s changing room. It was the one place where he never suffered from anxiety. You’d think sitting here before a match would be the most anxiety-inducing time, changing rooms could be loud and boisterous at the best of times. Suffocating at the worst. But there was always something comforting about this place. He’d sat in here since the beginning of his professional career and hoped to still be sitting here until his final match.
He sat with his head hung low, hands ringing together, breathing deeply as he waited for the anxiety to leave his body. He only lifted his head when he heard the door creak open.
“Hey, you alright?” You asked softly as you stepped in and shut the door behind you.
Chris blinked a couple of times “How’d you know I was here?”
You shrugged your shoulders as you walked over to stand in between his thighs “I didn’t, just had a hunch” you admitted “What’s up? you looked off when you left your seat”
Chris let out a long sigh as he looked up at you “Just felt a bit anxious and needed a break” he admitted.
“Oh” you muttered brows furrowing in concern “Are you okay? Is there anything I can do”
Chris shook his head “I’m fine, my anxiety just happens in gentle waves now instead of actual panic attacks, I can feel it coming and I know what to do to deal with it, like coming here”
You nodded your head, lips pursed in thought “Do you think I’ll get there, with mine?” You asked quietly.
Chris gave you a reassuring smile as he reached out to take your hand “Of course, you might not be able to stop them but when you wake up you’ll recognise what’s happening and won’t feel like you need to go to the bathroom” he explained his thumb brushing over your skin soothingly.
“Well I know having you there helps” you admitted making Chris smile.
“That’s good to know” he grinned.
“So do you wanna talk about it? What it was that made you anxious?” You asked softly, hand twisting in his so you were now holding it.
“The game” Chris admitted.
“What about it?”
Chris let out a long sigh “The Lions are set to get a bonus point win which will put them in second and us down into third and if we don’t get that home semi-final then I’m not sure we’ll get to the final” he explained “you saw the crowd yesterday, they were our 16th man, they can be the difference in playoffs and we need them”
You stepped closer, putting your hand on his shoulder “You don’t need them”
Chris furrowed his brows as he looked up at you “but-“
“You don’t need them, what decides who wins are the players on the pitch, you guys are on a winning streak the only reason you aren’t top of the league and untouchable is because you didn’t have a great start to the season” you continued.
Chris arched a brow “Is this supposed to be inspiring?”
You snorted and slapped his shoulder gently “You know what I mean, you guys are unstoppable all the pundits agree, you’re the favourites to win, even if you didn’t get a home semifinal you’ll play just like you did yesterday and bring the trophy home”
The corner of Chris' lips twitched upwards, he had to admit that you had a point but he still felt uneasy. You must have sensed that because you gently placed the tip of your finger under his chin and lifted it so his eyes met yours.
“Look I believe in you, I believe you're gonna win the championship even if you end up with an away semifinal. The Bears are the greatest in the league at the moment and it’s because you lead them so well, so you need to believe that you can do it no matter what because that belief is your sixteenth man, not the crowd” you told him “but if it’ll really reassure you, the wolves are a second-half team, they’re going to be out for blood and the lions won’t be able to keep up”
“Are you sure?” Chris asked.
“Certain I, unfortunately, know the lions better than anyone, they’re gonna struggle” you nodded “But like I said it’s the belief you have for yourself in here that matters, do you think you’re a team that deserves to win?”
Chris answered with no hesitation “Of course”
You smiled softly back at him “Exactly now just remember that and go win that championship for me” You grinned as you leant in to kiss his forehead.
Chris instantly felt all the tension melt away and he knew he just wanted you even closer. He wrapped his arms around you and gently pulled you down to sit on his lap, his forehead resting against yours.
“Thank you” he whispered.
“It’s okay, you were there for me when I needed it, I’m glad I got to return the favour,” you said softly, cupping his cheek, thumb brushing through his beard.
He pulled back enough to look you in the eyes. He didn’t know nor could he name the intense emotion he felt right now. All he knew was that you were a very special person to him, someone that he didn’t want to let go of. He knew that as soon as the season ended, whether that be with a championship win or not, he was gonna figure out a way to let your dad know about his relationship with you. Consequences be damned.
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