#these items have been blocking drawers all my life

[theminecraftbee]

On the subject of modpack recommendations, I made a custom one for myself a little while ago and i've been playing it nonstop since.

It's very chill, and lighter on the mods so my silly little laptop can run it without crashing. I put it together cause most modpacks are so complex and overwelming to my lil brain. I've found it a good mix of still feeling like minecraft, but having the benefits of the 'more' from the mods.

The lineup is: Create, Farmer's Delight, Sophisticated Backpacks, Waystones, Comforts (the sleeping bag mod), an animals mod called Naturalist, Xaero's Minimap/Worldmap, Decorative Blocks, Macaw's Doors/Trapdoors/Lights & Lamps/Bridges/Paintings for some more decor options, and Simple Hats (I wanted to wear a fox hat on my head. sue me). There's a few basic quality of life mods too, like AppleSkin and JEI, and some compatability add on mods for Create and the waystones to the maps, but that's it.

It's worked really well so far, and i haven't crashed at all-- though i have fallen victim to the massive sinkhole in the neighboring savannah I've been using as my strip mine and tree farm. I put keep inventory on, it's fiiiinnnneeeee-- I never like having stakes for death anyway, makes it too stressful. Let me throw myself from build height to bedrock without having to do the walk of shame for my stuff--

My game chugs a touch with Create, but all I had to do was turn down my graphics and be VERY careful to not dump out thousands of entities at once But that's just Create, really

oh, this can be a really great approach to playing modded too, especially if you personally know what mods you like and don't care about stuff like recipe compatibility! the main advantage of a 'true' modpack is normally that the good ones balance the recipes of the different mods to each other, and also i really prefer modpacks personally that have quest systems. but if your goal is to "play with mods" mostly, or, say, like you, you have a computer that can't handle heavier modpacks, or you just wanat a few things you like, this is a path that is DEFINITELY an option for a chill modpack!

i will say for those new to modded, here are some mods i recommend everyone include of the QOL variety, even if they're otherwise not doing many mods:

some variety of mimimap; xaero's is the one i'm most familiar with but choose your favorite.

if that minimap doesn't come with waypoints for some reason, get yourself a mod that adds waypoints.

quark. i never play modded minecraft without quark, if only for the rotation lock feature alone (never worry about which direction you're facing while placing a block again). you can go through quark's website to decide which features you'll enable and disable, and this is possible to do through an in-game gui, so even people who don't want to touch .json files can easily configure what quark features they do and don't use! it just adds... so many little qol things.

appleskin. this just makes the food bar more useful and shows you saturation. i don't know why vanilla doesn't do this.

jei (just enough items). you will ALWAYS WANT JEI WHILE PLAYING MODDED I CANNOT EXPRESS ENOUGH HOW HANDY THIS IS. a searchable list of every item in the game, which you can click on in order to see their recipes, and even automatically transfer items from your inventory to a crafting grid for that recipe! it's in every modpack ever for a reason! the larger the modpack, the more you're gonna want this!

a performance mod. personally i'd recommend not using optifine, as optifine is a mod a lot of other mods note break them, but if your particular pack is optifine compatible, go for it! most packs i've seen go with either sodium on fabric or rubidium on forge, but there are also other options! i'd just include at least one.

any other convenience you've ever had in another modpack that you want! personally, i need something like tom's simple storage network, drawers, or both to want to play a given modpack, because i get sad without storage, but maybe you only want to play packs with a variety of crops! maybe you think sophisticated backpacks or sophisticated storage are a requirement in your mind! maybe supplementaries or other decorative mods are a requirement to you! the world is your oyster! add whatever of those!

[univvrse]

the coven (chapter 8)

reader x bakugou x shinsou x kaminari x kirishima (still only kirishima in this chapter)

Coven- a formation of at least three or more vampires

He told you they were dangerous- why didn't you believe him?

previous parts can be found on my masterlist

on my ao3 if you'd prefer

997 words

While you were at work, Eijiro had gotten busy back at your house, unpacking your boxes for you in your room, sorting clothes into your unused chest of drawers and wardrobe and anything that looked dirty or worn into a pile, He moved quickly, hoping to surprise you when you got back. Eijiro had always had a preference for cleanliness, having lived through the outbreak of Spanish influenza in Japan where streets fell into states of filth with no one there to clean them.

Under the clothes he found an array of notebooks, most likely diaries. He didn’t want to read them yes he did but after seeing a page of one of them while trying to organise them, he simply couldn’t resist, he sat down on your bed and began to read.

The journals spoke of your life in America, things that seemed mostly trivial, boys you liked, dreams you hoped to achieve and such. It didn’t seem insignificant; it was your life- this was the most interesting a human had ever seemed to him.

There were small segments about your parents, you didn’t seem too fond of them though he could have guessed that- there were no family photos in your room. However, you did speak fondly of your old family cat actually a lot of your diary seemed to be anent to the cat. He didn’t finish reading them, not wanting to invade your privacy too badly and then began cleaning again.

He quickly finished your bedroom; your new furniture was untouched by dust or dirt so there was nothing much to clean there. He took your sheets of your bed and took a mental note to tell you to take them to a laundromat later.

You wouldn’t need them for the next few days anyway- his boyfriends already filling his head with thoughts of what they would want to do to you that night. So many that it may occupy you for a few days at least.

He then moved on to cleaning your living room, there wasn’t a lot to be done in the rest of your small apartment, clearly you hasn’t had much that you wanted to bring with you. He finished around 6 at slumped down on your sofa. It was times like this where he wished he could just take a nap.

It felt strange to leave someone in your house alone, but Eijiro clearly didn’t mind. It was easier to get a bus than you had thought, most of the signs having an English translation.

Your first day passed slowly and uneventfully, you were excited to go back to the vampire’s house that night. You had worked in a Starbucks back home for a few years as a teenager, so you were mostly familiar with how everything worked. Most of the items on the menu were recognizable, things that were made back home with the exception of a few items, but the shop mostly sold just straight-up coffee. A nice change to the “coffee” back home which most of the time was just milk and syrup.

The coffee shop was nice, a small shop run by the owner. It had large, light wooden windows that filled all the walls of the right wall- the shade of wood almost matching to the tables and chairs. It was a quiet shop mostly with a few customers here and there- you spent most of your shift on your phone and talking to the owner- a sweet women named Evelyn who had also moved to Japan a few years prior. She offered to help you with local customs and tips to help you while you lived there. You eagerly listened.

Despite the interesting conversation you had been having, you waited in anticipation for the end of your shift and finally it came. Evelyn gave you a hug when you left- shouting to you to get home safe as you left, closing the door behind you.

The bus ride dragged even more than your shift had, tapping your foot in excitement. Finally, the bus pulled up close enough to your apartment and you began to walk your 2 blocks home.

It was beginning to get dark outside, and the sun was beginning to leave the sky. There was barely anybody about and the slight clip-clop of your shoes was the only noise that could be heard. You walked quickly home, hoping Eijiro wasn’t bored out of his mind. At last, you finally reached your building- practically running up the stairs until you reached your door. You had left it unlocked earlier, it still was, and you entered your apartment.

Eijiro was almost the way you left him- still flopped on your sofa- though the room looked slightly cleaner. Had he cleaned up in here? He didn’t move when you entered- you assumed he was asleep, he didn’t take up the whole of the sofa and so you, after quickly shoving you’re your shoes of, went at sat next to his feet.

“How was work,” he mumbled. “It was okay, kinda boring,” you didn’t want to bore him with the mundanity of your day and thus changed the subject- “you been okay here?” He opened his eyes, smiling at you; “Yeah, it’s been okay, cleaned up in here- hoped you don’t mind?” “Not at all, thank you so much actually, I’ve been meaning to get to that.” “I stripped your bed for you, sheets are somewhere in your room- would’ve taken them to a laundromat but I’m guessing it’s still kind of light outside.” “Thanks,” you smiled, “I’ll take them when I get back from your house.” For a 134-year-old vampire- he was surprisingly easy to talk to.

“Sun was setting when I was on my way home, should be dark enough for us to leave soon.” “Shall we get going then?” he sighed.

[finerandbonnier]

The Adjustive Writer

Chapter Six of Lucian, just before the fall

[AO3]

A totally unrelated series of recollections, half remember truths, and outright fabrications regarding London shortly before the event that would come to be known as the Fall and that hold no greater meaning or significance.

The writer picked up her pen, held it to the page long enough to leave an ugly black spot then put it down again. She was no stranger to writer’s block. What writer is? But this was different, she wasn’t stumbling over characterisation or motive or what new disaster to subject the newly wedded Mrs Overhardt to. For once in her life, she knew exactly what to write. She just didn’t know why.

This was an unheard-of problem for the writer, who had previously always had a reason for what she penned. Money and catharsis were her two main staples. Neither applied here. The characters were, for once, not based off a relative or society acquaintance who had irritated her; they had sprung fully formed into her mind. And certainly no magazine in London would pay her for a story about a romantic relationship between two men. Still the call to write was irresistible and her hand unconsciously reached for the pen again.

A writing exercise then, she thought, and nothing more.

He glanced at the door knowing his lover should have been back far earlier. How typical of him, he thought. This was sadly not an uncommon situation for the man; many a previous evening had been spent like this. His partner off galivanting about the city. Him left behind waiting at home.

Earlier in the evening he had tried to distract his racing mind by throwing himself into cleaning the small living space the pair rented. Now he sat in wait for the tell-tale sound of a key turning in the lock that would announce his love’s return. Without the diversion of physical activity his mind shifted to thoughts of home. He’d travelled so far based only on the strength of his affection. What if it had been misplaced?

There was not much to like about his current lodgings beyond the man he shared them with. The rooms were cramped and frequently damp. The landlady short tempered. The city paled, often literally, in comparison with his homeland. He missed it terribly. Perhaps he would have been happier had he stayed there.

The sound of movement at the door roused the man from his reverie with a start. He leapt toward it just in time to catch the handle and prevent it from slamming into the wall as the door swung open. There stood in the threshold was the one he’d been waiting for, a little worse for wear perhaps and stinking of alcohol but safe and unharmed. The smile that stretched across that bewhiskered face was drunken but no less loving for it. His partner stepped through the door from the darkened hallway and into the candlelight of the room. Without a word he embraced his patient lover and swept him into a kiss. Hands gripped tight onto clothing as they lingered far longer in each other’s arms than they should have, neither willing to part.

The pair stepped further into the room; the door nudged shut with an idle flick of a foot. All worry and homesickness had fled the instant they were reunited.

Parting from the kiss but remaining so close he could feel the other’s breath heavy on his lips the man finally broke the silence. “What time do you call this?” he asked.

His love’s grin widened even further. “Did I worry you? You’ve got that look on your face that says you’ve been moping. Good god, you even tidied up! It must have been dire.”

“I’m fine, I just – I do worry about you. It’s hard not to the way you charge about sticking your nose into things that don’t concern you.”

“Occupational hazard with a nose as large as mine. Now where have you put my cards? Don’t tell me you’ve packed them away.” He began rummaging through drawers and cupboards, pulling the freshly tidied items out haphazardly and returning the room to its natural state of chaos. Turning from his enterprise to look over his shoulder at his lover he added, “I’ll always return to you, you know that right? I didn’t drag you halfway across the world just to abandon you.”

“You can���t possibly promise that.”

“Yes, I can.” He spoke with a finality that would brook no argument no matter how much one might want to point out the cold rational impossibility of what he was saying. “Now, how about a nightcap before bed, I think we’ve both had a long evening?”

The man nodded his assent and the other pulled a bottle of whiskey from the back of the drawer and collected two glasses from the sideboard. He poured a generous measure into each glass and handed one of them to his partner who knocked most of the measure back with barely a grimace before speaking.

“Did you find what you were looking for?”

“Hmm, no. Total dead end, nothing interesting at the palace at all and after I took such a risk getting in. It’s strange, I was so sure I was onto something.”

“Well, perhaps that’s for the best.”

The two stood in silence for the minute or so it took to finish their drinks. There was no need for words. Then, with the alcohol gently warming their stomachs, they retired to bed together where they would remain until the sun rose and the demands of the new day stirred them from their slumber.

Satisfied she had gotten whatever compulsion had possessed her out of her system the writer picked up the paper and carried it over to the fireplace. There she consigned it to the dim flames. For a few seconds it seemed the paper would not light and it lay there instead, suspended in time; the flames licking around it and over it but not consuming it. Then the spell broke and all at once the paper took and burst into brilliant flame, burned to ashes in an instance as though it were flash paper. No, the writer realised as she peered into the grate, not burned to ashes. For there were no ashes. The flames had completely devoured her writing leaving no trace.

[purplesurveys]

1917

Do you think the sound of rain is soothing? I do and always have.

Have you ever eavesdropped on someone's conversation? I've only ever heard bits and pieces. My attention is too short and my hearing too poor to ever follow an entire conversation.

Do you still play the slugbug no slugbug back game? I've never even heard of that.

Has anyone ever told you to grow up? I've had it said to me in a different way. There's a Filipino expression that translates to, "You're grown-up already," which is essentially a sort of real talk and you use it on someone when you want to tell them that they should already know better [about something].

Have you ever had a staring contest with a pet? xP It’s fun! Hehe, sure.

When you were little did you measure yourself a lot to see how much you grew? Not really. I liked comparing myself to my classmates, though.

Do you always win or lose at the silence game? I don't think I've played that.

Have you ever tried to read in the dark? I'm sure I have.

Have you ever felt guilty when someone close to you died? Yes. I was pissed when the group chat leaked, but had no idea Nacho would actually push through with what he did. My rash feelings will follow me for the rest of my life.

Don’t you hate it when you start to feel hungry just after you brushed your teeth? It does, but I'm over it. If I'm hungry, I just eat something and drink a bunch of water after. Take a lozenge too, if I happen to have one.

Have you ever ate a bug? I don't think I have.

Have you ever got a piece of glass stuck in your foot? Jesus no that sounds terrifying. I have dropped a wine glass and got nicked by a shard by my foot, but it didn't get stuck.

Do you think apple jacks is a good cereal? Idk, I've never heard of it nor tried it.

Do you make excuses a lot or know someone that does? Yes and yes.

Do you think pit bulls are as mean as everyone says they are? No.

Have you ever done something that gave someone the wrong impression? Many times.

Has someone ever given you something then took it back? I don't think so.

Have you ever had a wardrobe malfunction? Once.

At this age you are now, have you colored in a coloring book & had fun? I haven't done any painting/coloring since turning 26, but I've done it in my 20s and yes, it's always been fun. :)

Have you ever had a bubble bath? A few times. It takes so much time and effort though so I barely do so haha. I'd much rather shower.

When eating, are you more concerned with the taste or healthiness? Taste. I hardly think of nutrition in my food tbh, lol.

Have you ever shoved stuff under your bed to make your room look clean? Not under my bed, but I've shoved stuff in my drawers since they barely have anything anyway.

Do your fingers ever get tired from typing? Not my fingers, but my wrists can get sore.

Have you ever tried picking up an item with your foot? Sure.

What’s your opinion on sporks? It's convenient in certain situations, like when I have Chinese takeout and the main meal is on top of the rice. Otherwise, my general feeling is that I can take them or leave them.

If you had nowhere else to go, which friend of yours would let you stay over? I would guess Angela.

Do you know anyone who has been a victim of a drunk driver? No.

Don’t you hate it when people try to act like they know it all? Of course.

Are you nosy? I used to be, but I hardly care now.

Is there someone that makes your life hell? To an extent, yeah.

Have you ever been ditched by your friends? If I have, I've probably blocked it out of my head. That said, I'm sure it has happened.

If someone could see into your heart, what do you think they would see? That I am doing my best but that I am also tired.

Has someone ever snuck up on you & scared the shit out of you? Yes.

How long does it take you to brush your teeth? Anywhere between a minute and two.

Have you ever went to bed angry at someone? Yeah, I have.

Who do you call when you forget what your homework assignment is? Whoever was my closest friend or classmate in that class.

Do you interrupt people while they’re speaking? It's happened at work and it's always inadvertently so I always apologize. I'm not the type to interrupt outside of work, though.

Are you a rulebreaker? Not for the most part, no.

What would you do if you became an overnight celebrity? Put all my accounts on private and wait for the buzz to go away.

Do you know someone who can’t keep a secret? Yes.

Have you ever walked into a room & all eyes were on you? I'm sure it's happened.

What would you do if someone forbade you to see the one you love? I'd imagine I'd do everything I could to change that. I'm pretty passionate when I love someone...which is also why I don't do it anymore.

Do you believe everyone has a twin out there somewhere? No.

Have you ever felt replaced? I have.

Do you show your true colors? When I'm stressed, yes.

What would you do if your best friend was marrying someone you can’t stand? Hope that they are otherwise the perfect, non-toxic partner for my best friend.

What would you do if your car got impounded? Call my dad and ask what's going on and what's going to happen.

Do you lose your patience easily? When everything is going wrong at the exact same time, yes.

Do you think putting paper in a shredder is fun? I haven't tried doing that.

Are there any weird or creepy legends about the area you live in? I'm sure there is; I just don't know any heh, sorry.

What would you do if a skunk sprayed you? Google what to do as a remedy.

Would you drink a gallon of sour milk for $250? No thanks.

Has someone ever thrown something at you & it landed down your shirt? I don't think so.

What makes you feel sensational? I don't really know what this is trying to ask. 'Sensational' isn't something...I feel on a daily or even semi-regular basis? Haha.

What toys did you play with in the bathtub as a kid? We never had a bathtub, but we did have a tabo and balde. Those two were enough 'toys' to play with.

Do you like jumping off diving boards? I haven't tried to.

Do you follow ingredients when you cook or do you do what you think is right? I need to follow ingredients because I have no idea how to cook/bake.

Do you space out a lot? Not a lot, but it happens.

Do energy drinks make you feel jittery? I've never had an energy drink.

Do you have anything you want to confess to? I'm good, thanks.

Have you ever been to summer camp? Nope.

Do you wear name brands? A few.

Are you good at bingo? I mean it's a game based on luck, idk how you can be 'good' at bingo.

[kitchencleaningtips]

Cleaning and Organizing Your Refrigerator for Freshness

Cleaning and Organizing Your Refrigerator for Freshness

Cleaning and organizing my fridge turns out to be one of the most important step in improving my personal nutrition.

Fresh foods, including dairy, meat, and that is not stored properly can go bad quickly. By maintaining your fridge clutter-free you prevent unnecessary throwing away of food, decrease the chance of harmful bacteria to spill out and increase the life of your perishables.

Reducing Food Waste: A refrigerator that is full of labels and boxes in every direction can mean that things manner gets relegated to the dark zone at the back and thus, cause spoilage and waste. Decent storage means that everything is out in front of you and at hand, reducing the of foods being bad before you can consume them.

Improving Food Safety: A badly maintained refrigerator leans the way to pathogens and the danger of spreading them with bare hands. Doing regular cleaning and removing expired and spoiled foods is necessary for preserving a secure place for your edibles goody which is meant to be always utilized.

Extending Shelf Life: When your refrigerator is neat and items are ordered neatly, it’s a cornerstone of a system that prolongs the freshness of your wholly perishable foods.

Step-by Step Tidal Wave to Effective Fridge Cleaning

Preparing for the Task: Before you get started, the supplies cleaning should be available which include mild soap, baking soda for trapping odors, cloth or spongege and small brush for cleaning the difficult places.

Removing and Sorting Items: Out of your fridge, remove everything you find, getting rid of the food with expirations and possible decay. Group the remaining things into categories (Examples: Produce, dairy, condiments) to make all of this process easier. It’ll give you a chance to clean and reorganize .

Cleaning the Interior: Apply the mixture of warm water and gentle cleaner by wiping the all insides of your fridge such as the walls, shelves and doors. It would be a great idea to focus particularly on the creases and other spots that are situated far and some spills of food crumbs might have been.

Cleaning the Shelves and Drawers: Pull out all shelves and drawers and wash them with soap and warm, soapy water. Pure them well and let them air dry completely before returning them back in the fridge.

Fridge Organization Hacks

Zoning Techniques: Divide your fridge into zones, blocks or sections that will keep similar foods together. For example produce, dairy, meats, leftovers. You will be able to quickly identify them and have the ability to easily store them keeping them within the same system.

Label and Date Everything: Put labels and masking tapes on everything so that they can mark the kinds of items and expiry dates of containers and packages are quite readable. This simple technique will help you discover how to keep the food fresh longer by consuming items the elderly before they rot.

Using Clear Containers: Invest in the use of the tightly two clamped containers for storing the leftovers, produce and the other items. Furthermore, this will not only allow you to efficiently eradicate disarrangement within the fridge but also helps to awkwardly locate what's inside the container without opening the lid.

Maximizing Vertical Space: Consider the spatial height by using ashtrays, planters, or additional shelves that can be adjusted. This way you will keep everything in place and also increase space for putting in more items in your fridge.

Maintaining Freshness After Cleaning

Proper Food Storage Techniques: Proper storage is key. Separate various types of food into their respective categories or sections. One example would be keeping meat and fish in the undividedly coldest part of the refrigerator and keeping the produce in the crisper drawers for preservation of freshness.

Monitoring Expiration Dates: Monitor the expiry dates frequently and plan the utilizations of the foods by starting with those brought close to the expiration dates.

Rotating Stock: In this way, the next time you make a trip to the market remember the rule of "first in first out" and move recently bought products to the end of the shelf and vice versa.

Implementing these suggestions will help reduce the odor and avoid leaks

Absorbing Odors: Put an empty box of baking soda in your fridge to lose that typical unwanted smell that is connected with refrigerator. If your vehicle is equipped with an active carbon filter, remember to replace it every few months for maximum odor control.

Containing Spills: Along the walls put a row of shelves lined with absorbent eider mats or floor mats to clean, fast and avert any odors developing.

Regular Maintenance Routine: Create a schedule of regular cleanings and clean ups, for example quarterly deep clean or every week quick organizational session, to avoid the buildup of dirt and trash and keep your fridge in a good order.

Fresh Cleaning Products to Preserve the neatness of Your Fridge

DIY Natural Cleaners: Make your own ecofriendly alternatives to commercial cleaning products using natural ingredients like white vinegar, lemon juice, and baking soda. These biodegradable alternatives as bio pesticides are safer and more efficient than the traditional ones.

Eco-Friendly Products: For the same case of preferring branded cleaners, try looking for those that are made from plants, totally biodegradable, and completely harmless to humans. Among all this, always remember not to sacrifice the cleanliness in your fridge as you aim for minimum environmental effect.

Use Fridge Cleaning Routine and List for Regular Quality Control

When to Clean and Organize: Try to get the fridge thoroughly and the proper arrangement done clean in a time span 1-3 months, according to the number of members of the household as well as the usage. Also, bootstrap fast warehousing and disposal of outdated backgrounder weekly.

Printable Checklist: Prepare a checklist with pointers that you should follow to ensure that after the clean-up and organizing of the fridge you have not left out anything. This will give you a confirmation that dirt won't be anywhere around, and there will be always a clean and neat sight for your food.

These tips, combined with regular cleaning and organization will not only welcome a lively and tidy environment but also reduce food wastage and keep your perishable items in good order so as to extend their life.

[cevansbrat0007]

The Key

Summary: A broken furnace and a slip of the tongue lead to a special gift from your very stubborn boyfriend. Andy Barber x Black Reader

Warnings: Fluff, Angst, Protective Andy Barber, Insecure Reader, Pet Names, Light Smut, Implied Oral (fem receiving), Cursing, Minors DNI.

A/N: I don't know where this came from, but it's almost 3AM and I need to sleep. Anyway, I'm halfway done with like eight different fics, most of them requests. But then my writer's block kicked in. Please enjoy this installment while I try to get my life together. Part of my Growing Pains Series. All mistakes are my own.

___

"Ack, Andy Bear! What are you doing here?" You squeal as your man strides through your front door with you in his arms, your short legs wrapped around his trim waist. "Sh-shouldn't you be packing? Ope - don't forget the door!"

His booted heel kicks it closed. "Had to come check on you." Andy responds before brushing his warm lips over your own. "I'm your man, baby. It's what I do."

"But I'm fine..." You tell him, burying your face in the crook of his neck and inhaling his clean, masculine scent. "I don't need anything."

"No, you said you were cold. That makes you not fine." He tells you as his hand skims its way under your sweatshirt to lightly stroke your lower back. "I can't have you over here freezing while I'm out of town - I wouldn't be able to concentrate. I'd be too busy thinkin' about my baby girl home all alone just shivering."

"Oh, my goodness, Big Man. My landlord will be by to fix my furnace in a couple of days. Until then...I guess I'll just have to keep doubling up on sweatshirts." Wanting him to relax, you begin whispering sweet kisses along his bearded jaw, nuzzling at the soft scruff with your nose.

"A couple days is completely unacceptable." He growls, his tone letting you know that he was in no mood to argue. "It's November. And we live in fucking Massachusetts."

"Andy, sweetheart..." He shifts your smaller frame so that you're resting comfortably on his hip. Your boyfriend then carries you to your room and gently deposits you on your pink and periwinkle-colored duvet, all the while ignoring your feeble protests.

"You're staying at my place until that Ralph fucker decides to get off his ass and do his fucking job." Your man informs you as he begins rifling through your drawers, pulling out items and then haphazardly tossing them into your overnight bag.

God, how you adored every inch of your big, overbearingly ridiculous man.

"Honey, his name is Rodney. And I'll be fine. If it gets too bad, I can go stay with Melissa or something."

"Nope." Andy grunts, holding a pair of lacy pink panties up to the light. "The matter's already been settled. I want you in my home, snuggled in my bed, all tangled up in my of the sheets."

Shaking his head, he tosses the underwear back inside before muttering something about you "only needing the essentials".

Wait. Since when did those no longer fall under the category of essential?

"How many bras do you think you'll need? Eh, fuck it. You can bring 'em all if you want. It's the panties I have a problem with. Damned things always get in the way."

You scrub an exhausted hand over your face as your six-foot-something boyfriend remains hunkered in front of your dresser, quietly debating the usefulness, or lack-there-of, of your underthings.

"They get in the way of what?" Of course you just had to know.

"My fun." He grumbles, flashing you a petulant look. "So they stay here. Shit - I left my garment bag by the door. Go on and snag a few blouses and some pants, baby girl, and I'll help you get them all packed up before we freeze to death in here."

"Oh. My. God." You roll your eyes. It wasn't even that cold.

At least not yet.

"Andrew, darling, I never actually agreed to go with you. Plus, I don't even have a key to - oh." Your stubborn bull of a man silences you with a heated look before reaching into his back pocket and pulling out a small white box tied with a black ribbon.

"I was planning to give this to you on your birthday, but this seems like a much better time. As of now, I want you to consider my home your home too."

Removing the key from the box, you stare down at the shiny piece of metal your man had made especially for you.

Why did the weight of it feel so good resting in your hand?

"Thank you." You whisper, tears burning the back of your throat.

"You're welcome, Y/N. I want you to use it whenever. Come stay for a night, or for a week..."

Or, for forever. He thinks, letting the unspoken words hang in the air between you.

"But as for your not agreeing to go with me, well, I'm afraid that just won't work." Andy tsks as he zips up your duffle before unceremoniously tossing it into the hall. "One way or another, we're getting you out of this ice box, little one."

"Okay," you try again. "But what about my car? I really don't think -"

"Why are you fighting me on this?" He asks, his sensual lips set in a thin, firm line. "I need you some place safe and warm while I'm busy shaking hands and negotiating deals in D.C."

Your eyes stray back to the key that is now nestled safely in its little box filled with pink tissue paper.

"Answer me, please." Oh, Andy was using his attorney voice, the one that commanded both respect and attention in the courtroom.

"I - I just don't want to be any trouble. I feel bad for even saying anything about my stupid heat in the first place." You admit with a resigned shrug. "You need to be getting ready for your trip, but instead you're - you're here."

"I'm here because you need me."

"But I - I don't." You wince as those two words come tumbling out of your mouth.

Because it was a lie. You did need him.

"That scares you a little bit, doesn't it? The idea of needing someone, of needing me."

"No." You feel your lower lip begin to tremble ever so slightly.

God, yes.

"Y/N, how many times do I have to remind you that we're in this together? I'm your man. And I'm old-school when it comes to that shit. I believe in taking care of my woman, in providing for her however I can."

"I get it, Andy." You do your best to look at everything and everywhere but him. This man had a knack for making you feel vulnerable, and you weren't always comfortable with that.

"No, you don't." Using two long fingers, he tips your chin so that his soulful blue eyes clash with your own. "Whether you realized you were doing it or not, you called because you needed me today. And it's my job to take care of you - all of you."

"But I don't want to be a job for you. A job runs the risk of becoming a burden real fuckin' quick. And then when it becomes too much, bam! You run the other way." You jerk away from him, preferring to stare at your fuzzy sock-clad feet, wishing you could simply melt into the floor.

And there it was. You were afraid that this man would drop you like a bad habit the moment you became a burden. And as dramatic as it might sound, there was a part of you that knew that your heart might never fully recover something like that. Not with him.

Things are quiet for a while. And then Andy settles on the bed next to you before pulling you flush against him. The two of you are so close that you're practically half sprawled on his big lap, your bottom resting atop his thickly muscled thighs.

"Then please allow me to rephrase. It's not just my job to take care of you, it's my privilege, baby girl."

A sniffle escapes you before you can catch it.

"You're a strong woman. Strong enough to reach out when you need me. The same way it takes a strong man to lean on his woman. Understand?"

You nod, closing your eyes as you do.

"Look at me and say the words, Y/N." Your Big Man implores you before kissing the top of your head and burying his face in your curls. "I need to hear 'em, please."

It takes you a couple of seconds, but eventually you muster up enough courage to do as he asks.

"Yes, I - I understand. It takes a strong woman to, um, to lean on her man."

"Good girl."

"And please believe me when I say that your trusting me with your problems doesn't make you a burden. Not now, not ever. We're partners, baby."

For now and forever. Andy thinks to himself. It's clear as day to me, I just need her to see it too.

"Yes, we are, my sweet Andy Bear. I'm sorry for being such a neurotic mess sometimes. I know you must think you're dating a lunatic but -"

"Yep, I am." He sweetly interrupts. "But you've also claimed a crazy, possessive bastard as your man. So, I'd say we're pretty even." You feel another brush of his lips against your skin, this time on your temple.

The two of you sit there for a while in silence, simply enjoying each other's warmth. Truthfully, it wasn't that cold in your apartment, but according to the forecast, that would change over night. You needed to be some place with working heat and a comfortable bed.

And your Andy Bear came with all of that, complete with sheets and pillows that smelled just like him. Of course you'd find a way to pay him back. Maybe you'd cook him a big dinner, or buy him season tickets to the Patriots, or --

Your thought stream is interrupted by the sound of Andy's gruff voice.

"I think we need to do something to quiet that beautiful mind of yours, don't we?" He purrs, before lavishing the column of your throat with a hot, open-mouthed kiss.

And then you feel one large, slightly calloused hand go to rest on your chest. Using just a fraction of his strength, he gently forces you onto your back. A shiver courses through you as he runs his palms down the length of your body in an act of raw, unbridled possession.

Lifting your ass, you allow him to remove your black leggings. He makes sure to take his time, dragging the thin material across your heated skin with agonizing slowness.

A breathy moan escapes your lips when he parts your thighs, baring your panty-covered pussy to his predatory gaze.

"I'd like to rephrase my earlier statement one more time if I could."

Without warning, Andy leans in and buries his face between your legs. He takes a moment to inhale your scent before nuzzling your swollen clit through the damp fabric.

"Oh-oh-kaaay." You whimper as he briefly sucks the sensitive bud into his warm, waiting mouth. "

"It's my job, my pleasure, and my privilege to keep my lady's sweet body warm and her greedy cunt stuffed full. And I'm a man who believes in honoring his fucking commitments."

You cry out when he rips the lace from your body, leaving you naked and vulnerable from the waist down.

"This is mine, baby. All mine. Now, lie back like a good girl and let me show you just how much I enjoy caring for my woman, starting with eating the fuck out of her pretty little pussy."

END

[kpop---scenarios]

Life After Death

Pairing: Kyungsoo x Reader

Genre: Zombie! Au, Enemies to Lovers

Warning: Death, Blood, Smut, Swearing

Word Count: 9k

Summary: The morning you woke up, everything seemed normal, until it wasn't. The world is turned upside down the government and the World Health Organization have shut down, zombies around every corner and only the strong survive. You meet a few friends along the way, and lose even more as you continue to fight for your life. You never thought you'd meet someone under these circumstances but here you were, happy while surviving life after death. Though you should have known, there's never a happy ending in an apocalypse.

A/N: This is part of the collab started by @biaswreckingfics! Go to her page to see the other stories written by terrific creators!

"I'll see you later." You whisper to your sleeping boyfriend before you place a light kiss on his cheek. You open the front door to your apartment, looking back and around at everything, making sure you weren't forgetting anything before you left. As you close the door, you realize you forgot to turn off the radio when you hear one of your favorite songs playing. With a sigh, you glance at your watch and you see you're going to be late, so you leave it, just missing the important message that interrupted everything.

"Breaking News: The World Health Organization has announced extremely serious side effects from the recent vaccinations of batch number 0506361. If the numbers 0506361 are on your vaccination cards please report to your nearest hospital to seek medical treatment."

You don't notice anything different or weird as you walk down the pathway from your apartment building to your parked car. The sun is shining, the air smells crisp, today was going to be a good day, you could feel it. You slide into the driver's seat of your car, turning it on and immediately syncing your phone to play your favorite playlist to amp you up for the day of work you had ahead of you. As you continue to drive to work you notice the streets seem a lot busier than they usually were, especially for 7:45am, some people in their suits running down the sidewalk screaming. Your stomach twisted as you continued down the street, your eyebrows furrowing as you tried to watch the people and the road, slowing your speed. You look out your window and see a man laying on the ground, with another man on top of him. You rolled down your window to yell at them, but when the man turned to look at you, panic ensued. His eyes were white, his face was covered in blood, veins pulsating in his face. Nothing about him seemed human. He looked directly at you, and stood up. Your hands shook as you rolled up your window as fast as it would go. The man suddenly now bolted towards you, snarling. With your window up and both hands now on the steering wheel, you try to breathe through the lump that had appeared in your throat. As you keep driving, you see more and more of people being attacked, tackled and ripped into, people running away crying and screaming, vehicles crashing, buildings and cars up in flames. You could hear the blood curdling screams from inside your car. With shaky hands you switch the station of your radio to see if anyone was reporting on what the fuck was happening.

"..If the numbers 0506361 are on your vaccination cards please report to your nearest hospital to seek medical treatment.. there's a virus.. It's zombies. Zombies are attacking the city.. everyone seek shelter.. oh god.. please no."

You quickly turn your car around, speeding back to your apartment as you try to swerve off the undead as you rush back to your boyfriend. You may not know much, but you've seen enough zombie movies to know that you need to get supplies. You drive your car up and over the curb, parking directly on the lawn in front of your building and run inside. You were lucky you lived right on the ground floor of one of the first apartments in. You struggle to slide your key into the lock, the cries of residents pleading filling the hallway. Your key finally slides into the lock, quickly you turn it and shove your door open before slamming it behind you.

"Jaebum?" You whisper as you scrounge through the front closet looking for the duffle bag that you knew was in there. "Jaebum." You hiss again, running to the kitchen. You pack all the perishable food items and then begin filling up every jug you could find that had a lid with water. You tore through your junk drawer grabbing the flashlights and batteries, and any candles you could find as well as your butcher block.

"I'm serious, Jaebum. You need to answer me now." You hiss, bringing the bag into the living room. You guys needed to leave quickly, which meant you needed to pack even quicker. It wasn't like him not to answer you, it made you worry. You glance to the front door and his shoes were still exactly where he had left them the night before. You crept up to your closed bedroom door, with your hand hovering over the door knob. Your heart felt like it was beating out of your chest as you grabbed the knob, slowly turning it. You push the door open, expecting to see him, but he wasn't there. You quickly changed out of your work clothes, and grabbed everything from all of your drawers and shoved it into the bag. It wasn't until you had finished grabbing what you needed and you had a second to listen that you heard the shower running from down the hall, but for whatever reason, something didn't feel right. You tiptoed quietly down the hallway, standing in front of the door, you pressed your ear against it but heard nothing other than the sound of the shower running.

"Jaebum?" You whispered, gently knocking on the door, but there was no answer. You turned the knob, and opened the door. You saw your boyfriend standing there with his back turned to you. "Oh my god, Jae, we have to go! There are fucking zombies outside!" You gasp, still having a hard time believing those words that were coming from your mouth. In a split second he turned around, his face was beginning to contort, one eye was pure white.

"Y/N.. somethings wrong." He chokes out, spitting out blood before he falls to the ground, his body spasming while he froths at the mouth.

You let out a loud scream as you slam the door shut, running down the hallway to grab the duffle bag before heading out. You swing your door open to run out and crash into a man who falls into another group. You turn to apologize but already there were zombies staggering down the hallway at a quick pace. You whisper an apology before you run out the front door, his cries and pleas for help making your heart sink. You release a big breath seeing your car is still there. You climb in your front seat, closing the door as fast as you can and locking all the doors before turning your car on. Just before you were able to put your car in reverse and speed away, a man began banging on your window.

"Please miss, please open your door." He asks. You look at his face, he's sweating, blood splattered all over his face. His fists and arms remain pressed against your window, smearing blood across it. Your eyes drift down and you see a fresh wound - a bite mark and a chunk taken from his arm.

"You were bitten.." You say to him through the window.

"I'm fine. It's fine.. it's not a bite.. please." He begs. He turns to look behind him and looks back at you, panic written all over his face.

"Please miss, they're coming.. please." He cries.

"I can't." You yell, turning your head away from them. You put the car in reverse, stepping on the gas you pull away from him, knocking him to the ground. As your car stops so you can switch it into drive, you watch as the man gets mauled by a herd of the undead. You felt bad, but you couldn't have helped him, even if you wanted to.

You drove towards the freeway, thinking your best bet is to get out of the city. Your eyes were glued to the road and watching the mirrors, you watched as people panicked while driving, crashing into other cars trying to merge first, crashing into medians, and going in all directions. You could feel a panic attack coming along as you finally realized you were all alone. You had no one to talk to, no one to help you and that was terrifying. You glance down at your gas gage, seeing you had almost a full tank, you knew you would be able to make it to the one place that was probably the safest, your cousin Ray's.

You're stuck in traffic with your doors locked as you see a few people running to cars, trying to get in. There's a man, crying and panicking. No one would let him in, a herd of zombies following behind him. You needed to make a quick decision, so you rolled down your window motioning them over to you. "Here, get in." You yell, unlocking your doors. A man climbs into the backseat of your car, and you quickly lock the doors as soon as the door closes.

"Thank you." The man cries

"Have you been bitten?" You ask, turning to look him over.

"No.. no I haven't. Some men.. they pulled me out of my car, and took off, leaving me out there to die." The man explains. "You're the first person who offered me any help."

"I'm glad I could help." You smile through your rear view. "My cousin has a farm just an hour or so up from here. My family is heading there now. He's been preparing for an apocalypse for a long time. We should be safe there." You explain.

Earlier you had gotten a frantic call from your mother, her asking if you had seen what was going on. You couldn't understand why she thought you lived under a rock and didn't know anything. You did leave your house and listen to the news, contrary to popular belief.

"Thank you, thank you." He cries. You just smile as you continue to drive to Ray's farm.

**

An hour later you take a left turn, driving down the gravel road that leads you to the farm house. You drive slowly, seeing your mom's car, your aunt's car and a few other relatives. You sighed a sigh of relief, knowing that your family was safe. The two of you get out of the car and quietly make your way to the door. You softly knock but there's no answer. You turn the door knob, pushing the door open and it's empty. You walk down the small hallway and hear nothing. Your mom isn't talking, Ray wasn't yelling, no one was making a sound and that was very unusual for your family.

"Hello?" You call out.

You hear footsteps coming from down the hall as the two of you stand around the kitchen. "Hurry up." You laugh and cry.

As the footsteps got closer, you could hear snarling. Your laughter stopped as your cousin Ray came out of the back room. "Zombies." You whisper, backing away.

Not far behind him was your mom, dad, and aunt all coming out, rushing towards you all. "Run!" You scream, heading towards the door. You pull it open, the man behind you trying to get out the door, but he falls, crying as the undead come closer. He's doing his best to fight the zombies off but more stagger out from the back room, there are too many for him. "Run! Save yourself! If you meet my wife, her name is H/N, tell her I love her and our daughter." He yells. "I was trying to get home to them." He yells.

He's trying so hard to fight them, but he's bitten, he screams in agony as he's being ripped to shreds, his body being mauled by the undead.

His screams are now silent, the only sound filling the room is the sound of flesh being torn through.

You close the door, running back to your car. You see a gas can on the side of the house. You rummage through your car, knowing that you have a lighter somewhere in there. You remembered the argument you and Jaebum had gotten into about smoking and he tossed his lighter in your car.

Found it, under the passenger seat. As you went to get out of the car, you noticed something in the backseat.

A wallet.

You grabbed it, opening it up to see the license. It was the man's.

"Kim Jongdae." You whisper. You felt sorry for him, but you couldn't take long to mourn. You needed to be alert and get back on the road. You take your lighter and run to the gasoline. You pour it all over the front of the house, seeing your undead family banging against your windows broke your heart but you needed to do this. You flick the lighter, igniting the flame and throw it onto the ground. The house lights up, the flames quickly engulfing the house. You walk back to your car, slide into the driver's seat and sit there, tears pouring down your cheeks. You have no family, no friends, you have no one.

No one is coming to save you. You watch as your family and the house burn to the ground, exploding in the process.

That made you laugh a little bit, thinking of all the illegal shit your cousin Ray had in his basement.

A while later you get yourself together and drive over to the barn. If you knew anything about your cousin, it is that he always stored something in his barn, besides his pride and joy of a car, his old bronco, Monty. You pull the doors open, and take the tarp off the car, revealing its shine. Just as you remembered it. You peaked in the driver's side and sure enough, the keys were dangling from the ignition.

You began walking slowly to the back of the barn, opening another door, and here you found the jackpot.

Guns.

From a machine gun, to a pistol, to a shotgun. You gathered them all, putting the guns and the ammo in the backseat of Monty. You grab your bags from your car, tossing them in as well before looking around to see if there was anything else you could take. You notice a radio, but don't think much of it at the moment.

You climb into the driver's seat, and pull out of the barn, feeling safer than you have all day. You keep driving down the deserted highway. Abandoned cars everywhere, a few bodies laying around but most of all, no zombies but also no humans either. You're barely paying attention to the road, when you hit something, causing you to swerve, and the car to make a funny noise. You get out to check and see your front tire, flat as fuck.

You didn't have a spare. It was getting dark and you were exhausted. You moved most of the guns to the floor of the back seat, grabbing a blanket and some food and water. You change your clothes, wiping yourself down before having a snack. Laying down in the backseat you try to plan out your next move, but your eyelids get too heavy, and you can't fight it anymore. You doze off completely, and for a little while, forget about the disaster you're in.

You stayed in your car for weeks, never coming across anyone human. You missed talking to someone, talking to yourself wasn't the same. At times you almost forgot what your own voice sounded like. When it was safe, you'd get out of the car and wander around the forest, collecting sticks and branches to make fires with, so you could heat up some of your food. You have some, but you were starting to run low and you didn't know what you were going to do when it ran out. You were limiting yourself to one meal a day but even that didn't seem to help.

You learned when zombies came near the car, in a few or a herd, you needed to hide yourself very well. No moving, light breathing and packed under a lot of things. You were sure if they couldn't see you then they would continue on their way and leave. It almost always worked.

Life in the apocalypse was lonely and exhausting. That night you went to sleep, hoping for a miracle.

You're woken up later, by a frantic tapping on your window. Your eyes adjust to the sun as you look directly out your back window. A group of men stand there, all looking terrified as one of them taps on your window harder. You crawl up to the front driver's seat. You know you can't go anywhere, not with your busted tire. You turn the car on, rolling down your window just a crack.

"What?" You ask, side eyeing all of them.

"Please, we won't hurt you.. we just need a ride. There.. there's a military base a few miles up, but we just can't walk anymore. We haven't come across anyone, human in a while." He stutters.

"My tire is flat." You explain. "I don't have a spare."

"I can change it for you, just gotta take one off another car." A man pipes up.

You didn't feel uneasy from these guys and you were one to always trust your instincts.

"You change the tire, I'll give you a ride." You say. A military base? Maybe it would finally be somewhere safe for you to be.

The man nods and gets to work. By the time he's done the sun is beginning to set, and then you're on your journey to hopefully find somewhere safe.

You're driving down the highway, doing your best to follow the men's map that has every military base mapped out in the 100 miles surrounding the area. "What are your names?" You ask.

"I'm Changbin." The one in the front seat answers. "I'm Chan, and this is Felix." One in the back answers.

"Nice to meet you. I'm Y/N." You say with a smile. As you continue to drive, it quickly becomes night time, everything is black, except for the dim lights coming from your headlights. The two men in the back continue to loudly talk and argue over something, making it hard for you to concentrate. You hated driving at night, especially near wooded areas, you never knew what was out there.

"Can you guys stop?" You ask, glancing to the back.

They continued and got louder. Changbin was asleep in the front seat as they continued their bickering, making you get even more flustered. You turn your head to look back at them, telling them again to stop. They look at each other as you look back at the road and see something standing there. You get startled, yanking the wheel to try and avoid it, heading directly into the woods. The car heads straight on towards a tree and crashes. You hit your head hard on the steering wheel, knocking you out.

What feels like hours, but only seconds later you gain consciousness, just in time to hear Changbin and Chan crying. "She killed him." Changbin cried. "I'm gonna kill her." He yells.

You're struggling to open your eyes, your head is pounding.

You can hear some rustling between the two. "Don't." Chan says. "Leave her. She's in no condition to go anywhere. The undead will get her. She'll get her suffering, ``he says. "Let's take what we can and leave."

"No." You whisper. "Don't."

They can't hear you.

You can hear them rummaging through your car, collecting your guns, your food, your water, everything you had.

"Let's go." Changbin says, they both take off, leaving you there to die as you lose consciousness once again.

**

You're startled awake, surrounded by darkness. You unbuckle your seatbelt, getting out of the car with your head pounding. Your headlights are still on, and you see Felix's body laying on the ground. He had flown through the windshield from the impact of the crash. He wasn't wearing a seatbelt. You begin to cry, this was too much for you.

And then you remember. You look up and see a herd of zombies staggering towards you. They were quicker than you thought. You turned towards the road, running as fast as you could, your leg was throbbing. You run across the road to the other side of the woods. You can hear the snarling behind you as you do your best to navigate through the trees, branches breaking beneath your feet.

You stop, hiding behind a tree, trying to control your breathing. You listen, you can hear the sounds of them walking through the forest, searching for you. You take a second before you take off again, trying to zigzag through the woods in your best attempt to lose them.

You look up, seeing a fire. You run towards it, the flames becoming closer, you can hear the sound of faint words.

Then everything goes quiet. Suddenly the fire is put out and you can hear the sounds of guns clicking.

"Don't shoot." You yell out. "Please."

"What do you want?" A woman yells back.

"I'm.. there's a herd following me. I need help. I was in an accident, I was robbed. I haven't been bitten." You stutter.

"We don't need anyone else." A man yells. "Keep moving."

"Please.. I just need some help. I'm all alone." You cry.

"Move along, before I put a bullet in your head." He yells.

You let out a sob as you turn, beginning to run a different way. You hope you can find a safe place and a group of people but for tonight, you just hope you can survive the night.

**

It had been months.

Months since the outbreak, months of being on your own, months of fighting, scavenging, and hiding. You had come across a few groups, but they wanted nothing more than to take what you had and leave you defenseless. You had learned to hide from most people, giving yourself the advantage of a surprise attack. Most of the time you were successful and they just took off but sometimes they also fought back.

A week ago you had come across a small town, and had found some food and water and a place to stay, but you knew better than to stay in one place for too long. You quickly packed up your belongings into your backpack and grabbed your large spear. You learned awfully quick how to take down a zombie with it, finding it to be much more efficient than a gun, especially with having spears on both sides.

As you walk through the forest, your eyes and ears are open, listening for any signs of the undead. You stop in your tracks, hearing the sound of grunting and yelling, sounding close to you. You walk towards the sound, and come into view of four men trying to fight off a herd. They looked to be struggling, and although you don't usually like to insert yourself into others' fights, you felt like being nice and lending a hand. You run towards them, spearing a few in the head on your way.

You quickly join the fight, taking down a few zombies, as they get a little distracted, seeing another person helping.

"Focus." A man yells, bringing them out of the confusion.

A few minutes later, the last one is stabbed in the head, his decaying body dropping to the ground. The four men turn to look at you, two of them with a smile on their faces, one looking a little confused and the other one looking right angry.

"Hi." One with brown hair and a large smile says.

"Thank you." The blonde one grins.

"No problem." You laugh.

"I'm Baekhyun, this is Chanyeol." He introduces. "And that's Suho." He says, pointing to the confused one. "And that's Kyungsoo." He finishes, pointing to the angry one.

"Nice to meet you all." You say. "I'm Y/N."

"Are you all alone?" Chanyeol asks.

You nod your head.

"What's your story, Y/N?" Suho asks.

You smile awkwardly as you look at the four men who surround you. "My boyfriend turned into one of them when this whole thing started, so I was on my own from the beginning, in a sense. I met a man on my way to my cousin's farm, where my family was gathering, and when we got there they all had already turned. He..he tripped and he fell while trying to escape and he was bitten." You shudder. "I gathered supplies and I took off, and ended up with a flat tire a few hours away. I stayed in my car for weeks, managing pretty well on my own. I met three guys who offered to change my tire for a ride to a military base but when we finally got going.. it was dark and they were arguing in the back." You explain. "I turned around to tell them to stop, but they wouldn't listen and when I looked back at the road, there was something there and I swerved." You sigh. "We hit a tree, and one of them flew through the window. The other two robbed me of everything I had and I've been alone ever since."

"Well not anymore you're not." Baekhyun smiles. "You can join our group."

"Yeah!" Chanyeol exclaims.

"No." Kyungsoo grunts, walking past you, glaring at you. "We didn't need your help. And you're not joining us." He spits. "You're not going to let her join, right?" He asks Suho.

"I don't know." Suho sighs.

"Suho, everyone around her dies. She's bad fucking luck and if you bring her with us, we're all as good as dead." He spits.

"Meeting." Suho announces.

The four men huddle around, whispering to each other. You can make out Baekhyun and Chanyeol saying yes, and Kyungsoo saying no.

Seconds later they all stand up, Kyungsoo looking pissed with the other two looking happier than a pig in shit.

"If you would like to, we would like to invite you to join us. We know it's tough out here, and I can't imagine what it's been like to be alone." Suho says.

You look between all the men, even if one hated you for no reason, you were tired of being alone, and being scared alone.

"Yes." You announce. "Thank you."

"Come on, our camp is this way." Chanyeol smiles, waving you along. Three men begin walking away, but Kyungsoo walks towards you.

"I don't trust you." He murmurs, moving in close. "If anyone from this group so much as gets a splinter, I'm coming for you." He growls into your ear, his tone is low and very threatening. Goosebumps cover your skin as you feel his hot breath on your ear.

You nod your head.

He turns away from you, running towards the rest of his group.

Maybe this wasn't such a good idea?

**

You felt like your legs were going to collapse as you continued to walk behind the group. Baekhyun turns around, smiling as he announces you have arrived. You look around and see a bunch of trees, but no camp, except for the small campfire pit that sat on the ground.

"It's.. nice." You smile.

Chanyeol, Suho and Baekhyun start laughing.

"Look up." Chanyeol says.

You tilt your head to the sky, and see a decent sized tree house sitting between a few trees. Your jaw drops, this was one thing you had never expected to see. "Come, we'll give you a tour." Baekhyun says, beginning to climb up the swinging ladder. You follow behind Baekhyun, the rest coming up behind you. When you get inside, you're honestly still amazed. It wasn't much but it was safe and it was out of the way and off the ground.

"We pull up the ladder when we're here, and when we all leave we just hide it." Suho explains. "We have food, water and sleeping bags. The most important things. We all pitch in around here, whether or not it's repairs, runs, or fights, everyone helps." He says, looking at you.

"Of course. Whatever I can do to help, I will." You assure them.

"Or don't, I'm not ready to die." Kyungsoo mutters, setting his stuff down.

Your eyes darted over to Kyungsoo, giving him an offended look. He looks back at you, not caring if he's hurt your feelings. You can sort of understand why he's weary of you, but it's not like you killed these people for the hell of it. You were determined to prove that it wasn't you, that you weren't bad luck. How you were going to do that, you had no idea.

**

That night you sat around a campfire, your belly fuller than it's been in a while, while you listened to stories Baekhyun and Chanyeol shared about their friend group. As it turned out, there were a total of twelve of them when this first started. Some of them were unfortunate to be ones who had gotten the batch of vaccines, a few they had lost while traveling, some died in fights, or took off to find their loved ones.

"Have you come across any of them?" You ask.

"We've looked, but no luck so far. There are two we're still looking for. Oh Sehun and Kim Jongdae." Suho says.

Your heart stops. Your head darts up, looking at him with wide eyes.

"What?" Chanyeol asks.

"What was that last name?" You whisper.

"Kim Jongdae? He was one of our best friends." Suho tells you.

You gulp, there's a ball forming in your throat. "What?" Kyungsoo yells. "What do you know?"

"I.. He said he was trying to get back to his wife and kid.. h-he told me to run and save myself. I wanted to help him b-but I didn't know how." You choke out.

"The man that was bitten at your farm. That was Jongdae?" Kyungsoo asks.

"I saw his license in his wallet.. he had dropped it in my car when we got out. I'm so sorry." You cry.

Kyungsoo rushes towards you, tackling you to the ground, straddling you.

"You fucking bitch, I knew you shouldn't have joined us. It should have fucking been you. You should have died, not him." He screams in your face, spit flying from his mouth as he hands pin your shoulders to the ground.

You're bawling as Suho and Chanyeol pull Kyungsoo off of you, he's still crying and yelling. "It should have been you!" He yells.

Baekhyun helps you off the ground, guiding you to go up into the tree house. He sets out a sleeping bag for you, tucking you in as you cry into the built in pillow. 'I'm so sorry." You whimper.

"I know. And we know it's not your fault. Jongdae was a clumsy motherfucker so I'm not surprised he tripped. Don't take what Kyungsoo says to heart. He's been through alot and he's not warm to new people. Just give him a bit." Baekhyun tells you. He gives you a half smile before climbing down the ladder and sitting back around the fire, helping to calm things down. That night you fell asleep with tears staining your face.

**

Days bled into weeks, and then into months, until this new life and these men were all that were at the top of your mind. Chanyeol had finally been able to make contact with the ham radio that had been found on one of many expeditions. There seemingly were whole groups of people like yourselves out there, sticking together and trying to survive. You reflected on the wonder of it all as you cleaned the rabbit you had caught, the best you could.

Kyungsoo had become different with you, he didnt give off a hatred towards you anymore. His words didn't cut quite as deep. Slowly you were becoming closer, and you enjoyed it.

Suddenly, you feel a presence behind you, waves of hot breath covering the nape of your neck, sending chills down your spine. He didn't even need to speak, you already knew who it was. "You're doing it wrong." Kyungsoo breathed, his body close to yours.

"I'm not." You retort, continuing to skin the dead animal. You tried to ignore his presence, and that fact that he made you feel so many mixed emotions whenever he was around.

You both hear a crunch of leaves behind you, making Kyungsoo step away from you and turn around.

"What are you guys doing?" Baekhyun asks, raising his eyebrow.

"She's skinning the rabbit wrong. She's going to take off all the meat with the fur." Kyungsoo announces.

"I am not.. shit." You spit, looking on the ground, seeing hunks of meat still attached to the fur.

"Told you." He mumbles, walking away and into the forest to try and find more food.

You stick up your middle finger at the man who drove you crazy day in and day out.

"Y/N." Suho calls out to you, a few hours later. "If you want to take a bath, go to the stream now. It's going to be dark soon."

You nod your head, climbing up the ladder to grab your things. You slide back down, just in time for Kyungsoo to be protesting something.

"We've all got other things to do, you're the only one free." Suho tells him. "Y/N, Kyungsoo will be keeping watch for you."

"I really don't ne.." you start.

"Yes you do." He says, looking at you. "And you will go. That's it."

With an aggravated groan, Kyungsoo stomps off towards the stream, with your speed walking to keep up with him.

As you finish up your wash, you dry yourself off with your towel, pulling your jeans on over your damp legs. You bend down to grab your shirt, when you hear a rustling from behind you. You stand up straight, your heart pounding in your chest.

You hear it again, the sound now closer to you. "Fuck." You scream, running towards Kyungsoo. Your body collides with his, your breasts pressing against his hard chest. "There's something out there." You whisper.

You both hear the sound, Kyungsoo holding onto you as his eyes dart around, taking in the surroundings. Seconds later a deer walks out of the bushes, grazing and you can feel your heart slow down.

"It's a deer." He announces, looking at you. You look back at him, your eyes trailing to his heart shaped lips. Your own set of lips parting slightly as you look back at him, his eyes haven't moved from your face. Without thinking you inch yourself forward, which causes Kyungsoo to inch back. Your stomach sinks. You cannot believe you just did that. Why did you think that he would return a kiss?

"We should head back." He says, avoiding eye contact and clearing his throat.

You feel so embarrassed. You quickly whisper an apology before grabbing your things and taking off, hearing a faint "wait." From behind you. You're running through the words, desperately trying not to cry as you can hear Kyungsoo running behind you.

You finally slow down, trying to catch your breath as your lips quiver. You hear a stick break behind you. You turn around with a sigh, and come face to face with a zombie, snarling as he reaches out for you. You scream loudly as you try to fight it off, tripping in the process. You fall back with him on top of you as he tries to go in for a bite. Black bile is seeping from his mouth, his breath is rancid.

"Help!" You scream out, one hand trying to reach for something, anything that would help you take him out.

Suddenly his body goes limp and you hear the sound of a sword coming out of his head. You roll the body off of you, and see Chanyeol smiling above you.

"Thank you." You sigh in relief. Chanyeol puts out his hand to help you up, when he's attacked. Another zombie staggers up to him, latching his teeth to Chanyeol's neck. He screams out in agony as the monster devours him before your eyes.

"No!" You cry. You take Chanyeol's sword, putting the blade right through the zombie's skull. Chanyeol sinks to the ground, sobbing while he holds his neck. "I'm sorry." You cry. "I'm so so sorry."

"It's.. not.. your...fault." He breathes. "Tell them.. I love them.." he stutters.

Kyungsoo, Baekhyun and Suho rush to Chanyeol's side. Baekhyun is sobbing while Kyungsoo and Suho hold back their tears.

"I didn't.. I didn't know there was a second one." You sob.

Kyungsoo walks over to you, his face stone cold. He wraps one arm around you, pulling you in close to him. "It's not your fault." He murmurs. The two of you stand there, watching the life drain from Chanyeol's eyes.

Baekhyun announces he will be the one to put Chanyeol down, but would like to do it in private. Three of you walk away from the sobbing man, your heart full of guilt.

**

The next day, the camp is quiet. You were busy making wood spears, like Chanyeol had taught you a few weeks ago. You couldn't even look at Baekhyun. You knew the two of them were best friends and your heart hurt so badly that Chanyeol died while trying to save you.

Had you not been so stupid and tried to kiss Kyungsoo, then this would never have happened. You knew this was your fault and there was nothing you could do to make it better. You can't bring Chanyeol back and you really wish you could.

"Careful." You hear from behind you. You turn your head and see Kyungsoo leaning against a tree. "If you keep sharpening it like that you're going to end up slicing your finger off." He tells you.

"This is how.. Chanyeol showed me how to do it." You say. You could barely speak his name.

Kyungsoo chuckles. "Yeah, he wasn't the best at doing it either." He crouches behind you, wrapping his arms around you to show you the proper way of doing it. Your heart still flutters as he touches you.

"Thank you." You whisper.

"Anytime." He says, standing up and walking away from you.

Fuck. You were so fucked.

**

That night you couldn't sleep. You stared at the empty spot beside you, where Chanyeol used to sleep. You could hear the small whimpers coming from Baekhyun and you just couldn't take it. You slowly slid out of your sleeping bag, slid on some shoes and climbed down the ladder. As you stand in the forest, you take a deep breath of fresh air. You need to gather your thoughts and heal yourself. You begin walking through the woods. It's quiet, and you didn't plan on going very far. As you're walking, you stop to listen. You hear a noise coming from in front of you but you didn't know what it was. You tried your best to hide behind the tree, limiting your breathing as you continue to listen. You can heat twigs breaking and leaves crunching. Your heart begins to race in your chest, you squeeze your eyes shut.This was a bad idea, you should not have left the tree house.

"What are you doing?" You hear from in front of you. You open your eyes and see Kyungsoo standing in front of you.

"I thought.. oh my god." You sigh. "I thought I was going to die."

Before he can say anything you both hear groans and snarls but you're not sure where from. You unintentionally let out a squeak. Kyungsoo covers your mouth with his hand, pushing you up against the tree. His body presses hard against yours, you can feel his hot breath against your neck.

The two of you stay like this for what feels like hours. When the sound is finally gone he pulls away from you.

"What are you doing out here?" He growls.

"I needed some air, and to think." You explain.

"You could die out here. This has to be your stupidest decision." Kyungsoo scoffs.

"No." You begin. Before your brain can tell you not to say anything, your mouth begins to move. "My stupidest decision was trying to kiss you." You say, turning away from him to walk away.

"I was surprised." He announces. "I didn't think you'd try and kiss me. I didn't think you'd even like me. I treated you terribly." He tells you.

"That's probably why I like you unfortunately." You sigh, making him laugh.

As the two of you are walking back towards the house, you hear whispers coming towards you. You both stop, hearing the sound of a gun loading, making you stop in your tracks. Kyungsoo pulls you behind him, moving both of you towards a bigger tree to hide behind.

"Show yourself walker." A man screams. "I know you're out there."

Neither of you say anything. Kyungsoo is against pressed up against your body, shielding you from any danger.

A while later you see a light flashing. It flashes towards your tree, making Kyungsoo push into you more, trying to keep the two of you hidden. The light passes the tree you're behind and continues to walk away. Neither of you move until the light is completely gone and out if sight. Both of you let out a sigh of relief but Kyungsoo doesn't move away from you. His face hovers close to yours, you can feel his breath on your face.

You wait. You wait for what you hope will happen but you don't think that it will come.

Until it does. Kyungsoo presses his lips to yours. You're shocked at first, until he begins moving his lips against yours and you get into it. You wrap your arms around his neck as he slips his tongue into your mouth. You moan into the kiss, making him groan.

"I want to fuck you." He says, his lips still just barely touching yours.

"I want you to fuck me." You breathe.

Kyungsoo turns you around, pushing you up against the tree. He kneels down, pulling down your sweat pants and underwear.

"Spread your legs." He demands.

You spread them as far as you can. You can hear the sound of his belt unbuckling behind you. Your pussy throbs in anticipation. You don't know how big or small he is, but you hope he destroys you. You couldn't even remember the last time you had been fucked at all.

Kyungsoo steps up behind you, taking two fingers and searching between your lips for your hole. He chuckles when he finds it, he can feel your juices dripping from inside of you. "So fucking wet." He groans, slowly pushing his two fingers inside you. Immediately you clench around them, it feels so good. "I needed to make sure you were wet enough, and fuck are you ever." He whispers in your ear.

He pulls his fingers out of you, and lines his cock up with your hold. You're bracing yourself on the tree as he pushes himself inside you. Your eyes practically roll back into your head as he stretches you out.

"Oh god." You cry, your fingernails digging into the tree bark.

"Shit." He cries, slowly pulling out of you before snapping his hips and harshly pushing his cock back inside. "It's gonna be quick." He groans.

That was fine with you, you knew you could rub your clit twice and cum, it had been too long.

Kyungsoo has his hands holding onto your hips as he snaps his, grunting and groaning from behind you. You reach between your legs, touching your clit. You begin to slowly rub it and you can already feel your intense orgasm already building up. You feel like you're going to cum already. His cock feels so nice sliding in and out of your pussy, the sound of his grunts and moans, with the feeling of his hot breath covering you and giving you shivers.

"Cum." He grunts. Your tighten your pussy around him as you orgasm washes over you, leaving your body feeling weak.

Kyungsoo moans loudly as he pulls out of you, jerking his cock to cum all over your ass. He lets out a string of swear words as he releases his load, breathing heavily as he works through it.

You both pull up your pants, and get situated. "We better get back." He says, walking back towarsa camp. You follow closely behind him, confused about your feelings for him, but more so his feelings for you, if there were any.

**

The next day you wake up with the thoughts of what happened last night over flowing through your head. You didn't know how to process this, or what was going to happen now. You decided to see how the day was going to play out and just go about your normal routine.

When you got downstairs you said hi to Suho, Baekhyun and Kyungsoo. Two of them said goodmorning back to you, and one did not. You tried to stop thinking about it but it was hard and you knew he wasn't the type of man to tell you his feelings.

However, all day he ignored you. Anytime you tried to say anything to him, he walked away, he refused to answer you and honestly you felt extremely disrespected. Your eyes burn as you fight off the tears, watching him talk and laugh with Baekhyun while you just get ignored.

Suho on the other hand most definitely noticed something was going on because a little while later you see Suho quietly yelling at Kyungsoo.

"I don't care what you did." Suho spits. "Fix it. I refuse to have a hole in our team because one of us is being a dick. Fucking fix it." He murmurs again before walking away.

**

That night you laid in your sleeping bag, wondering if this is what it was going to be like. You having feelings for Kyungsoo, and him taking advantage of it. Fucking you when it's convenient for him and ignoring you the rest of the time. Even after death, life was still so fucked.

You feel something pressing against you from behind. You slowly roll over and see Kyungsoo laying beside you in his sleeping bag.

"Can we talk?" He asks.

You nod your head.

"I." He begins. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the way I treated you, I'm sorry for the things I said and for the way I acted when I found out about Jongdae. Its been hard to lose people, and it's even harder to accept new people into the group. You're doing a great job here and we're lucky to have you." He whispers.

"Thank you." You smile. But you really want to know why he ignored you all day. "What was going on today?" You ask.

"I enjoyed last night. I, um, had a girlfriend when this whole thing started. We got out together, we met up with Suho and Baekhyun and Chanyeol and she really helped build alot of this. I lost her a while ago, and it's been hard. I didn't think I would meet anyone, or fall for anyone else and then you came along. I feel guilty for liking you so much, like I'm cheating." He explains. "I was convincing myself it wasn't cheating."

"I get that. I was in a relationship when this thing started. Unfortunately for me, he ended up being one of the ones who received that does of vaccine. I had to leave him in our apartment and take off." You whisper. "You'll always have her memory with you and it's something you'll treasure. I didn't know her, but I'm sure she wouldn't want you to be sad and mourning her."

"You're right." He sighs. "It's hard to let go, but I do like you, Y/N. I want you to know that."

"I like you too." You smile.

The two of you lay there, whispering to eachother, laughing and enjoying the night. You couldn't have asked for anything better.

**

Over the next few weeks, the others had changed. With Chanyeol being gone, it took a toll on Baekhyun. He often sobbed at night, crawling next to you so you could rub his head while he cried. Your heart went out to him.

This life wasn't easy.

Suho had become much more grimmer and sullen. He barks orders at people, never engaging in coversations anymore. He's tired, everyone is tired with very little of hope for the future. Fighting for your lives everyday, scrounging for food and water is a struggle, however none of this stopped you and Kyungsoo from sneaking off when you could to be together.

Neither of you really talked when you weren't fucking and that was okay with you, you knew he still had feelings for you. It was the little things he did for you when no one was looking that reassured you. You both knew that announcing your relationship to Suho and Baekhyun would not end well, so keeping it between the two of you would be the best.

You announced to Baekhyun and Suho that you were going to the river, they both just nodded while Kyungsoo offered to be your watch.

It didn't take long for him to be pulling off your shirt and for you to slide off your pants and panties. Both of you walked into the cool water, soaking yourselves before Kyungsoo pulled you towards him. He lifts you up, letting you put your legs around him as he leans in for a kiss. You can feel his cock sliding against your pussy, waiting to be pushed in. He breaks the kiss, leaning down to pepper kisses along your neck as he thrusts, pushing himself inside of you.

You throw your head back as he holds you, fucking you harshly. There was never time to fuck slow, you always needed to be quick and get it done, just in case.

He pumps himself into you, his hand reaching between you and him, touching your sensitive bud and rubbing while he pounds his cock into you.

"Fuck baby." He groans. "You feel so fucking good."

You hold him close as your orgasm builds, biting your bottom lip and your hands gripping his hair. "Just like that." You breathe. "Don't stop." You grind yourself on him as you begin to cum, intensifying your orgasm. "Oh god yes." You moan, breathing heavily.

"I'm gunna cum." He moans, thrusting harder. Seconds later he releases himself, shooting his cum inside of you, his head resting on you as he catches his own breath.

"Fuck." He breathes pulling out of you. "I love you." He whispers.

You stare at him with wide eyes. This wasn't something you had been expecting at all, considering you did your best to hide the relationship at all costs. "I know it might be too soon, but I do and I need you to know that."

"I love you too." You smile.

You're brought out of your sweet moment when you hear screaming from Baekhyun and Suho. You both rush out of the water and get dressed as quick as you can before running back to camp.

"What?" You breathe. "What happened?"

Baekhyun and Suho grin as they stare at the radio. "Listen!" Baekhyun yells.

“Our dear citizens, to those who have survived. The WHO has created what promises to be a vaccine. We are asking all our citizens to make their way to the nearest hospital facility. Troops are being deployed along with helicopters and planes to transport as needed. Today … we have hope in the world again”

You all burst into tears. You did it, you survived and met some wonderful people. You have a love you had never thought you'd get again.

Kyungsoo embraces you tightly, crying into your shoulder as you do his. Quickly Suho and Baekhyun join your hug, all of you feeling such relief and happiness, for the first time in a long time.

As quick as you all can, you gather what you need to make the trek to find a hospital. You say a quick goodbye to your site that has kept you safe for so long, before taking off, hand in hand with Kyungsoo, and Baekhyun and Suho on either side of you.

It wasn't long into your journey, when you hear the familiar sounds of zombies wandering through the forest. The four of you prepare yourselves for a fight but as they come out, you realize there are more than you all had anticipated. You try to fight your way through the crowd, but somehow you're separated from the group, trying to take on more than you can. The others are distracted, they aren't paying attention to your calls for help. A zombie lunges at you, knocking you back. You're crying loudly but no one is coming to help. The other zombies kneel beside you as you keep trying to fight them off, but one takes a chunk out of your shoulder. You scream in agony as you lose your strength to fight. They're devouring you as you're fading into the darkness. You can hear Kyungsoo yell no and all the pain stops. You see him standing over you as you spit up blood. He's crying over your body, asking you to stay with him but you can't. You're tired of fighting, you want to let go now.

So you do.

You open your eyes and see a film over everything. Your body is sore, the scent of meat makes your mouth water and your stomach cramp. Everything feels stiff but something smells so good. Your hearing is better than ever, picking up the sound of a rapid beating heart and the sound of crying. Wait…Where’s my heart beat? You look with horror at the meat...

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, “I love you.” You reach out to stop the knife but your body is stiff and I responsive as you watch the knife plunging towards you. It’s me you scream in your head as it all goes dark

There is no happiness in life after death.

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

Hollow Pass (Part 1)

Summary: When the reader has to spend a day in the mines for work, she’s less than thrilled. When the miner showing her around for the day, Dean Winchester, is an ass, she’s even less thrilled. But an accident will change all of that and if they want a chance of getting out of the mess they’re in, they’ll need to put their lives in each others hands, literally...

Pairing: Miner!Dean x reader

Word Count: 4,100ish

Warnings: language, injury, frightening/claustrophobic/near death situations

A/N: Please enjoy the first of this 2 parter!

_______

You sighed as you stood in the trailer of the manager’s office, a jumpsuit and a pair of boots sat in a chair. Your boss, bless his heart, thought it was always a good idea for corporate positions to experience a day in the mines to truly understand the product and what the little guy went through on a day to day basis. The argument that you were not really corporate, not even close, seemed to go over his head.

“Y/N, you gonna change? I need my office back,” said the manager through the door. You pulled it open and pouted. “I don’t want you going down in the mines anymore than you do but if you want to make corporate, you gotta do what the CEO says.”

“Dad I don’t even want to work there. I like my simple office job.”

“Then why have you been in all those development programs at work?” he asked. You shrugged and he sighed. “Cause you can’t say no.”

“Do I have to?” you asked, looking back at the overalls.

“Do you want to quit?” he asked.

“I don’t want to lose a good paycheck. But I don’t want a corporate job either,” you said. 

“Then you’re shit outta luck,” he said. “I’m gonna put you with the Winchester boy. He’s on safety checks in our most secure mines.”

“You mean the ones that never have problems.”

“Funny how that all coincidentally happened today of all days,” he said with a smile.

“Thanks dad.”

“I don’t want you going anywhere near explosives. You’ll be safe doing the checks with Dean for the day.”

“Hi, I’m Y/N,” you said twenty minutes later. The man in overalls and a hard hat rolled his eyes.

“I’m ten minutes late because of you which means I’m gonna get docked those ten minutes of pay so thank you little miss corporate.”

“I’m your boss’ daughter, jackass.”

“Still ain’t my boss,” he said. You huffed and headed over towards the mine entrance when he grabbed the back of your overalls. “No, dummy. You have zero safety gear so unless you want to die, you’re coming with me.”

“Asshole.”

“Dean Winchester at your service,” he said, dragging you over with him to some lockers. He punched a card and went to the storage racks, seemingly grabbing a few items and putting them on. He picked the hard hat off your head and grabbed one with a light and a wire attached to it, clipping it on your belt. He put something over your shoulder you put your arm through like a sling and clipped a mask onto the back of your belt, a flashlight and a small hand pickaxe going through your other loops. “Turn this lamp on anytime you’re in the mine and never, ever, take off your hat. If I yell at you or you smell something funny, get that mask on. Flashlight and the axe are backup for emergencies.”

He put a radio in your pocket and looked you over.

“Oh and for the love of God, do not wander off. I don’t care if you see a bug or break a nail or gotta piss.”

“What do you do if you have to…” you said.

“Normally you piss against some rock like a man but special manager’s daughter we’ll walk you back out here, take our slow ass time, make me go longer than my shift and because I was late today, I don’t get overtime.”

“That sounds kinda illegal.”

“The contracts for this company are a fucking nightmare,” he said, walking out of storage.

“Why work here then?” you asked as he went to an area and grabbed a clipboard. He took two water bottles and clipped them on each of your belts before whistling for you to follow after.

“Well somebody had to pay for his baby brother to go to law school and it wasn’t going to be my drunk of a father now was it,” said Dean, stopping and writing something down. 

“So you didn’t grow up with mining in your family?” you asked.

“No. I’m not some redneck hillbilly like you imagine either,” he said. He flipped on his light and turned yours on when you got to the mine entrance. “Crouch.”

“Huh?”

“We ain’t riding the cart which is missing, dumbass. Crouch down so you can fit in the tunnel,” he said. You swallowed and had to bend down some, following Dean closely. “Ain’t claustrophobic are ya cause now’s the time to tell me.”

“No,” you said. “Jerk.”

“Ah, see? We’re getting along already.”

You walked for five or so minutes before the ground sloped down further and an entrance to the right opened up. Dean straightened up and you did the same, stretching out as he grabbed the back of your jumpsuit.

“Dude, would you stop doing that?” you said.

“Would you stay in my line of sight?”

“That’s harassment. You can’t touch me without my permission,” you said, crossing your arms. He blinked a few times and rolled his eyes quite possibly the most dramatically you’d ever seen in your life.

“This? This is not an office building. Every single time you step in here you run the risk of dying and you have zero clue on how to stay safe down here. I hate it when you people with your big offices and penny pinching bullshit come down here and complain about every goddamn little thing. If you want out, get out of the fucking mining business.”

“You’re an irritable person,” you said. He grumbled and tugged you along with him until you brushed him off. You followed him down a hallway and another, Dean checking things off on his clipboard as he went. “Are you gonna explain any of this stuff?”

“What do you think?” he said. He whistled and you followed him down a few more hallways when he stopped a gauge looking contraption. He checked a few different numbers and valves on it as you spun around. 

“I guess it is kinda cool. That somehow you guys know how to block up rocks and leave all these cracks and know how to make it so it doesn’t all come crashing down.”

“Cracks?” he asked as he squatted down and read off a meter.

“Yeah like that big one,” you said, pointing at the wall across the way. He turned around and looked at it for barely a second before he grabbed your arm. 

“Move. Now,” he said. He pulled out his radio and pressed down the button. “We have a grade five crack in Lodge Six West. Do not blow. I repeat do not-”

The ground rumbled and you heard a splintering noise, Dean pushing you back into the hallway you’d been in. He jumped on top of you and covered your body with his, all the lights going out, a loud thundering of falling rocks happening close by. It seemed to go on and on before it finally stilled, the hallway pitch black.

“You alright?” he asked.

“I think so,” you said, coughing when you felt dust in the air.

“Don’t move,” he said. He lifted his head and there was some light, Dean looking around before climbing off of you and staring at a new wall of rock. He looked at the hallway you’d been in, clicking on his flashlight and you saw where the rock dropped off about a hundred feet away. “Well. Shit.”

“What just happened?”

“The rock was unstable and they already set off the charges and it shook the mountain so now there’s a giant hole over there and our exit is blocked.”

“What’s that way?” you asked, nodding down the only unobstructed hallway.

“Further down into the mine before you hit the decommissioned area.”

“Is there a way out,” you asked, Dean patting his side.

“Fuck. My radio is under all that,” he said. He took out yours and handed it to him, Dean nodding before he turned it on. “Main do you copy, over?”

There was silence on the other end and Dean hit the button again.

“Main this is Winchester in Lodge Six West with…what’s your name?” he asked.

“Y/N Y/L/N.”

“Y/N Y/L/N, manager’s kid. Copy, over.”

“Winchester this is Main. We got lots of calls coming in from ground crews about a shaking.”

“Lodge Six West Hall K is a giant crater of death and Hall H is buried, right up to the entrance of junction HJ.”

“Injuries?”

“We’re okay,” said Dean.

“Give me a second.”

Dean took a deep breath and coughed. He tapped your mask on your belt and you put it on, the air a bit easier to breath. 

“Winchester this is Melvin.”

“She’s okay, boss. Just a little shook up. Saved our asses from winding up in the ground even if she doesn’t know it yet,” he said. He held out the radio and you pulled down the mask. 

“Dad I’m fine, really. We both are. It’s just kinda dark and smelly is all.”

“I know. Put your mask on sweetie until you can get to some cleaner air,” he said. You put it back on, Dean, getting to his feet. He pulled you up and looked back at your blocked path. 

“Any other collapses?” asked Dean.

“None reported so far. Everyone should be out of the mine’s or on their way. Alarm is blasting.” You looked back at Dean, his eyes shutting.

“Melvin we can’t hear it. At all.”

“Rodney’s out checking where our side of the collapse starts. We’ll get you out,” he said, someone panting in the background.

“Hall B, Mel,” he said. Dean turned away from you and sighed. No one said anything for a long time until Dean finally raised his head.

“We got two 16 ounces bottles of water. If she rations it, she’s got a shot,” said Dean quietly.

“No, she doesn’t,” said your dad, his voice softer than you’d ever heard it. “How long does your radio have?”

“Mine got crushed. Hers was on a quarter charge. I’d guess maybe an hour or two tops,” he said.

“Should we call your brother?”

“He’s hiking in Glacier Park this week. No cell service,” said Dean quietly. “Just tell him to check my bottom desk drawer. There’s something for him there.”

“I can do that,” he said. “Is there anyone...parents-”

“All due respect sir, I’d rather you talk to your daughter,” he said. Dean held out the radio to you and you picked it up, Dean skirting around the corner to the one unblocked hallway.

“Dean?” you asked, following over there. He was leaned against the wall and looked over his shoulder at you. “What’s going on?”

“They can’t dig us out in time.”

“What do you mean-”

“Talk to your dad. You’re wasting time. That battery won’t last forever,” he said. He turned back and you walked back around the corner, sitting down against the wall.

“Hi dad,” you said.

“Hey,” he said, his voice shaky. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. “Mom’s on her way down to talk, okay? She’ll be here in ten minutes.”

“I so quit this job,” you said, wiping off your eyes with the back of your hand. He laughed and you threw your head back. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything. I’m gonna stay on the line as long as I can, okay?”

“Okay. Okay.”

Two Hours Later

The battery in the radio had died about fifteen minutes ago. There was no sound aside from your sniffling and Dean’s down the hall. You got up eventually and went into the hall, sitting down beside him. You handed him the radio and he clipped it back on his belt.

“You okay?” you asked, voice hoarse.

“You try listening to someone say goodbye to their parents and not bawl,” he said. He wiped off his face and took a deep breath. “Air’s better now at least.”

“What do we do now?”

“Now,” he said, clipping his water bottle onto your belt. “You sit there and try not to exert a lot of energy and that water will last you a few days.”

“We both heard my father. They can’t drill or dig or do anything fast enough. It’d take weeks. I’m not sitting here next to your dead ass so take your damn water back,” you said, shoving it back in his chest. He didn’t speak but put it on his belt, pulling his knees into his chest. “Why were you so mean to me before? You gave up time on the phone for me. I don’t think you’re what you pretend to be.”

“I’m a dead man walking and that’s a fact.”

“Technically you’re sitting.”

He smiled and rested his face in his knees. He sat up and reached over behind you, hitting off your headlight.

“We need to conserve power as long as possible,” he said.

“Will our lights go out before we dehydrate to death?” you asked.

“Yes,” he said. “This is what it’ll be like.”

He flipped off his lamp and you swore you’d never experienced a darkness so deep. You felt his hand graze yours before holding it and you swallowed.

“Kinda less scary knowing you can turn it back on again,” he said.

“You didn’t answer my question. Why such a brute?”

“You do this job long enough and most people think you’re a dumb sack of shit with nothing in his head. You’re dead weight, odds are you’ll die down here or get into some kind of accident and have to go on disability the rest of your life. You corporate people are always so stuck up, like I’m not even good enough to be the dirt on your shoes. I didn’t give you a chance because odds were you were like all the rest of them. You’re the only reason we didn’t die in that hole, very painfully.”

“Wouldn’t we have-”

“No. It’s not a simple hole we would have fell in. Falling rocks, crushing and hitting, landing on you, ones you hit yourself. Might not kill you immediately. You’d feel it.”

“Dying of thirst is better?”

“I’d say so. Still get to keep this handsome face, or what’ll be left of it,” he said. He flipped his light back on and you scooted closer. “I think you’re very attractive.”

“Excuse me?”

“I’m gonna die in like three or four days. Life has no consequences now and I happen to find you very attractive and you seem like a smart, sweet woman that put her parents a little at ease during the worst moment of their lives.”

“Who’s your brother?” you asked. “No consequences after all.”

“He’s a lawyer...and my best friend.”

“You said you did this job for him.”

“Student debt is a bitch. I try to help him out and the overtime helps make dents in it,” he said. “Our parents had debt out their asses. It caused so many problems for us. I wanted him safe, never have to worry about the next meal on the plate or the roof over his head or having to wear my hand me downs ever again. At least he’ll get my life insurance policy. That should help.”

“I have been busting my ass since I was a college freshman in that office to move up the chain for a job I didn’t even want. I completely lost nearly all of my twenties to work. All so I could die in here.”

“Well I know this doesn't sound good but I’m glad I didn’t die all super painful. Or that I’ll be alone,” he said. You smiled and nodded, Dean returning it. “Got any bucket list shit we can pull off down here?”

“We could make out,” you said. “Never knew anyone could make that jumpsuit look good.”

“Why the fuck not,” he chuckled. He leaned in close and your helmets bonked, Dean pulling his off and yours, quickly cupping your face. 

His lips were gentler than you thought, the two of you stopping when your lips were pressed together. You rested your forehead against his and broke off only an inch.

“Not as much fun at the moment as it sounded,” you breathed out.

“Pretty good last kiss though,” he said. You put your helmets back on and you grabbed his hand again. 

“Don’t let go down here. Please.”

He reached to his belt and undid a little pouch, pulling out a small tether of rope. He clipped one end onto him and the other to you.

“For when the lights go out,” he said.

“How long do we got?”

“About a day, maybe a little more,” he said. You sighed and turned your head, staring down the rest of the hall. “It’s decommissioned, Y/N. It’s a death trap.”

“Is there a way out?” you asked.

“Maybe. Maybe they never find us though,” he said. You stared at him and he nodded, hitting your headlamp back on. “Enough of the pity party. Let’s go get out of here or die trying.”

He stood and held out a hand, hoisting you to your feet. 

“So. What’s our best option?” you asked.

“It’s alright for a bit until we get to the decommissioned section. When we get there, that’s when it gets dangerous. Technically it’s dangerous now considering the blast but we’re okay for a bit,” he said. 

“Let’s go then,” you said. He nodded and you followed him down the hall, walking side by side. 

“Alright so the decommissioned section is called Hollow Pass. Beyond that is Upper Seven. If we can get to Upper Seven, we can get out the old entrance I’m pretty sure. Never been in there but hopefully it’s not a maze over there.”

“So Hollow Pass is the hard part.”

“Yeah.”

“Why was it decommissioned?”

“Unstable ground. Holes, pockets of air, rotted support beams, wood planks.”

“So it’s a death trap.”

“Yup,” he said. “We’re probably gonna die down there.”

“What do you think our odds are?”

“Well it’s been out of order for over fifty years, we have no map, I have no real idea where exactly to go...I give us 1% odds.”

“Beats are 0% odds here.”

“Good way to think about it considering we’re going to most likely die.” He stopped walking and took a deep breath. “If I fall or whatever, follow the widest hall possible and keep away from wood and cracks as best as possible. Ration your water and eventually you’ll find your way out.”

“If you fall I’m definitely not gonna make it.”

“Well at least try. You can tell my brother how devastatingly brave I was that way.”

“You just spent the past hour crying.”

“So did you,” he said. You bumped his shoulder and he returned it but it was playful and soft. You walked together quietly for a moment until Dean rounded a corner and took a deep breath.

There were a few planks across a hallway, Dean kicking them down, frowning when they broke pretty easily.

“There’s gonna be rot.”

“Lovely.”

“We don’t have to go,” he said. “You don’t have to. There’s a chance-“

“There’s no chance Dean. Not if we stay up there. If you don’t want to go, I will. Maybe I can get help back in-“

“We’re doing this together or you’re staying. I can go and you-“

“We both go,” you said. 

“I go first. You step where I step and if I tell you to do anything, you do it.”

“Dean. We already established that you’re not a hardass. You can lead the way but you know, nicely.”

“Alright, alright,” he said. He gave more slack in the rope attached to the two of you and took a deep breath. “Let’s go.”

He was calm for a few minutes until you were turning down a hallway, Dean suddenly stopping in front of you.

“What is it?” you asked.

“Look,” he said. You poked your head around him, swallowing at the rotted wood on the ground, holes worn into the planking. “Y/N that’s not good. Rot means there’s water and water means erosion and erosion means big shafts hundreds of feet straight down under those wood planks.”

“How much of it is wood?” you asked. You both looked ahead and sighed, the whole hall flooring covered in wood. “Shit.”

“Y/N. This is too dangerous. I’ve worked in mines since I was 18 and it’s way too dangerous.”

“Dean. I don’t want to die. If we don’t do anything, we’re dead in three days, maybe less.”

“Maybe they come up the decommissioned mine and get us,” he said. 

“Dean. The mountain collapsed from what my dad said. They are not coming in here, risking even more lives, in this mine. It might even have collapsed on the other side on the way out. We don’t know. All we do know is we stay and we’re dead or we go and we’re maybe dead.”

“You still won’t let me go on ahead on my own to try to get some help?”

“You’re not leaving me alone,” you said. You stepped ahead and he yanked on the rope, pulling you back. “Dean. Stop.”

“I go first,” he said. You held up your hands and he swallowed, Dean stepping past you, carefully putting his weight down on each plank. “Follow. Every footstep exactly where mine go.”

You followed after, the only sounds your breathing and the occasional board creaking. Dean put a foot down and stopped moving forward when you heard snapping. 

“Go back. Slowly.”

You stepped a foot backwards, putting weight on it and your foot going straight through. Dean grabbed your arm as you pulled your foot up, a few sticks falling into a deep dark pit. 

“What do we do,” you breathed out.

“Well we’re over rock that fell away so there’s a big hole beneath us if the rotted wood is anything to go by,” he said. You heard the slight waiver in his voice and sighed. “We make a choice. Forwards or backwards.”

“Back looks bad. Plus we already probably broke the supports.”

“I think solid ground is in front. But I have to jump for it,” he said. You looked past him and shook your head. 

“Dean, it's way too far. I can try to walk over there if you let out the rope. I get to solid ground and then you walk and if you fall, I got you with the rope.”

“Sweetheart, there’s no way.”

“You’re too heavy and we can’t stay here,” you said. You slipped past him and he tried to grab you but you went quickly. “Dean let out the rope. Now.”

“Fuck. We’re gonna die.”

“No we’re not,” you said, walking quickly, planks creaking but you sighed when you had solid rock under your feet again. “Alright. Just go where I did and fast.”

He took a deep breath and walked a few steps, a loud groaning of the wood making him move faster.

You hit the ground the second you saw him go down, the wood breaking away. Dean shouted and you dug your heels into the dirt. 

“Y/N!” he said, falling straight down into a hole and out of view.

_____

A/N: Read Part 2 here!

[shadowsinger11]

You, The Stars And I

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader

Word Count: 3.8k (oops)

Requested by @amira3113: Can I request a fic abt the reader seeing Fred and George comforting a kid after Umbridge punished him and the reader helps them and Fred thinks it's so cute what she is doing and she does the same and extra mega fluff, pls?🥺 you don't gotta do it if u don't want to btw.. so no pressure ;)

Warnings: A bit more angst than intended, Fred being a soft boi™️

A/N: I don't know how to feel, I just roasted myself hardcore with this and I'm feeling even more single. I'm sorry for not being able to use a 'keep reading' tab

Masterlist

The sun fell asleep behind the endless hills, enveloped by dense, opaque darkness. Its golden rays no longer shone through the wide windows of the castle and instead let shadows creep into the long, empty hallways, revealing the ugly truth about what the school had turned into over the past few months.

The naked walls stood tall, towering over you and inching closer with every step you took, and you hung your head low, aiming to block out the singular buzzing thought in your head.

Hogwarts was no longer home.

Your heart ached at the memory of hundreds of students chattering and laughing all day long, freely walking around the school grounds and simply being children. You so terribly missed being careless and having fun without the fear of potentially facing a life-threatening punishment.

But now there was no laughter, only your footsteps echoed in the hallway.

You were headed straight to your common room, determined to go to sleep early. The curfew and the dozens of new restrictions prevented you from meeting your friends, and you hoped that sleep would at least somehow distract you from your worries for a couple of hours.

The deafening silence nearly caused you to miss the muffled sobs and quiet whispering, coming from a turn not far away. It seemed as though there were more than one voice speaking, and your chest clenched with dread.

You hurried your pace until you reached the source of the noise, and peeked from behind the wall.

The sight most definitely surprised you, but the pain in your chest only sharpened.

There, on a bench, Fred and George were sitting, hunched over a small boy, probably no older than a second year. You could tell by his green robes which house he was in, but his red, tear-stained face was what alarmed you.

You immediately approached him and fell to your knees. George was on his left, rubbing slow, soothing circles on his back, while Fred was on the other side, holding his small hand in his, on the back of which a few words glistened with fresh crimson blood.

I must not ask questions.

You sent the twins a questioning look, but Fred dismissed it by shaking his head; clearly that was not the time for an explanation, nor was one necessary to begin with.

You placed a hand on the boy's knee to make your presence known.

"Hey. How are you feeling?"

This only caused the child to sob harder and you internally cursed for having to go through this routine.

"It hurts…" he whimpered, "I thought Hogwarts was fun. I met friends last year and it was great. But now… Now I really want to go home."

Your jaw clenched and you swallowed hard, furious about seeing innocent children slowly losing faith and joy in life, turning into hollow shells of the amazing people they could have grown to become.

The horrifying experience would inevitably have a massive impact on them and unexplainable guilt twisted your stomach. And even though the long-term damage had already been done, you could at least take care of the temporary pain.

"It's not going to hurt for long, I promise," Fred whispered, tenderly playing with the boy's trembling fingers. "Ours are already fading."

"That's true, see?" George showed the back of his hand on which you could make out the faint, bloody words 'I must not cause trouble.', and you felt sick. "Soon you won't even remember it was there."

Tears stung in your eyes, but before you gave them a chance to fall, you turned to the redheads.

"I can heal the wound. Well, to an extent. If anything, I can lessen the pain," you began. "But I need to grab something from the Charms classroom."

Fred frowned, confused, "Wouldn't you need a potion for that? Why Charms?"

"Snape isn't the only one armored with potions for just in case things go wrong. And we can't risk going to the dungeons at this hour. It's not wise to tell Madam Pomfrey yet either."

The twins nodded. George said.

"It's not a good idea for all of us to go at once. I suggest one of us returns and covers the others up if necessary."

"I'll go with her," Fred stated without a second thought. "I can get them safely where they need to be, let her do her thing and bring them back."

Fred's eagerness to help filled you with warmth and for once that night you had the strength to smile, even for just a second.

"That sounds like plan then. But you should really take the map," George added, already pulling out the neatly folded Marauder's Map from his backpack. "Don't wanna risk getting caught by the ugly toad, you know."

"As if she'd be strolling down the hallways late at night. Doesn't she have hobbies?"

"Does hanging creepy pictures of cats on pink walls count as such?" you commented and the second year giggled, which made you feel slightly better as well.

Fred took the map from George and you grabbed the boy's hand.

"Good luck, guys. And, like, don't die."

"Woah, greatly encouraging, Georgie," you replied sarcastically, but appreciated it nonetheless. "You sure you'll be fine?"

"Absolutely. I got the route memorized like the back of my hand. I'll be careful."

And with that, George headed towards the Gryffindor Tower while you, Fred and the boy went in the opposite direction - the East Towers.

The night was eerily quiet, only the footsteps and shuddering breaths of the three of you keeping you sane. The soft light, gleaming at the tip of your wands, didn't do much to brighten the empty hallways which now seemed like endless voids of darkness.

Occasionally Fred would warn you about Filch's cat approaching, or Peeves causing trouble nearby, but fortunately, you reached the classroom sooner than expected.

"Alohomora," you whispered, but the door didn't bulge when you tried to open it.

Fred grinned, "Surely a Charms professor wouldn't let such a cliché unlock his own classroom."

"Shut up," you grumbled. "Aberto!"

The door opened. Fred's eyes widened in amusement and you flashed him a charming smile on your way in.

You placed the boy to sit on a desk as you and your friend rushed to look through drawers and chests for something useful. Most of them were full of basic items such as old books and quills, half-full jars of salamander blood, pearl dust and gillyweed, and after long fifteen minutes of not having found anything, you slid your back down against the wall, sighing in frustration.

Sleep-deprivation was kicking in, but your anxiety was getting stronger.

You needed to do something. Fast.

"What about this chest right here?" Fred asked from the other side of the classroom, pointing at something under Flitwick's desk.

You shook your head, "Doesn't open, already tried. Even if the cure is there, we can't get it."

"I take it your brilliant spells don't work anymore?" the redhead teased and you so badly wished to slap away the cocky smirk on his face. Or kiss it. There was something oddly attractive about the way he'd set your nerves on fire, and you hated yourself for enjoying it. Fred seemed to love it too.

"If you're only here to be annoying, just leave."

"I'm here to help too. I can multitask."

You nearly jumped from the ground to strangle him, and he clearly saw through your intentions because his toothy grin almost split his face in two. That bastard.

That super annoying, devilishly handsome bastard.

"Are you gonna keep staring at me, or are you coming? Not that I mind the attention," he shrugged.

You rose to your feet and made your way over to where he was standing, not granting him the pleasure of facing him, "Don't flatter yourself, Weasley. Your stupidity is simply impossible to be unnoticed."

Fred laughed, "Oh, so I was annoying and now I'm stupid too? Make up your mind, woman."

You pulled out your wand and smirked at him over your shoulder.

"You said it yourself that you can multitask. Aberto!"

Nothing.

Fred squinted his eyes as he stared at the wooden chest. What spell could the professor have possibly used? Could you have even heard of it? The chances of ever finding the precious item were becoming grimmer with each passing second and the inevitable sense of dread had started to settle in.

After a minute Fred finally spoke.

"I think your problem is that you're using spells that only work on doors. You need a charm which unlocks containers."

"You might be right. What would that be then?" you enquired, glancing at the redhead. He took his own wand out of his robes.

"I know a spell that's come in handy before. Hopefully it will work now," he wettened his lips and said. "Cistem Aperio!"

Blinding light caused you to cover you eyes,  and the chest opened with a loud thud which could have easily alerted the entire floor of your presence if it wasn't for the silencing charm you were lucky to have used when you first entered the classroom.

You finally dared to open your eyes and kneeled on the ground, carefully rummaging through fancy-looking boxes and vials sparking with liquids that seemed to be quite important.

"What are we looking for?" Fred asked as he crouched next to you.

"Wound-Cleaning Potion. Purple."

It was weird having Fred stand this close to you; sparks of electricity would pierce your heart every time his shoulder brushed against yours, or his fingers would accidentally graze yours. And when they did, they had you longing more and more for their touch, for their warmth.

But this warmth did not belong to you.

You swallowed down the disappointment and instead attempted to focus on the task at hand.

Just as you had expected, the precious crystal bottle was carefully wrapped in sparkling cloth and placed inside a box that was hidden deep in the corner of the chest. You breathed a sigh of relief and got on your feet, determined to stay away from Fred. For his sake and yours.

"Here it is," you smiled at the boy as you walked over to him. "Fred, can you get me some bandages from the drawer in the back?" you asked, pointing right behind him, and he did as he was told.

You took the hand of the young Slytherin and examined it closely - the wound was sure to leave a nasty scar, one that would never heal.

"Can you make it disappear?" he asked, fearfully.

Your heart dropped. But you replied with all the courage you could muster.

"I can try."

Fred was soon by your side and placed the medical items on the desk; a half-full packet of cotton, some bandages and a small box of bandaids. You muttered a 'thanks', not even looking at him, and opened the middle-sized bottle. It spread a characteristic smell of ashes, mint and lemon when you lifted it towards your nose - it was ready to use.

"So what now?" Fred asked.

Not granting him a reply, you simply took a small piece of the cotton and dipped the opening of the bottle into it, soaking it with a generous amount of the purple, dense liquid. The smell grew stronger.

Fred could only watch as you yet again gently grabbed the boy's hand and carefully dabbed the back of it; a thin steam of smoke soared from the contact of wet cotton and wounded flesh, purple mixing with red, and the kid hissed in pain. You worked attentively but quickly, with measured gestures and a straight face, and you missed the way Fred's eyes seemed to soften at the sight of you helping a small kid.

But one thing baffled him - why did you suddenly start acting so emotionless? Even towards the youngling who didn't know a thing. And though your expression seemed calm and collected, the Gryffindor noticed your tensed jaw.

What he wasn't aware of, however, was the racing speed of you heart, increasing each second. He wasn't aware of the short, shallow breaths you were taking because if you had allowed yourself to breathe freely, you'd certainly let out tears along with the deeps sighs.

Every move was calculated, every word and breath.

You pressed a fresh piece of cotton against the now cleaned wound and kept it there as you began to roll the bandage over it, securing it in place. When you were done, you placed a gentle, lingering kiss on the hand.

"There. It should do the trick."

The boy's face lit up and he hugged you, not giving you another choice but to wrap your arms around his small body. At least you had managed to bring him back some of the lost warmth.

"We should get him to his dorm," you told Fred and despite not facing him, he knew the words were directed towards him. That still didn't prevent the stinging pain in his chest from being so effortlessly avoided by you, and he frowned, bewildered by your unexpected coldness towards him.

Had he accidentally done anything to upset you? Were you mad at him? What for?

The boy jumped to his feet, visibly less burdened despite the present tear stains on his puffy cheeks. You hoped he'd be able to get some sleep that night regardless of the circumstances.

The three of you left the classroom as quietly as you had entered it and went in the direction of the dungeons. Fred, as usual, did his job at looking at the map and keeping track of the names, moving on the yellow-ish piece to old parchment.

Fortunately, you reached the Slytherin common room without any disturbances along the way, and the boy went inside, eager to crawl into bed and not think about the ugly lady who had punished him so unfairly just a few hours ago.

The door closed without a sound, leaving you and Fred on your own.

His soft voice broke the burdening silence.

"Are you going to bed?"

If you were being honest, you hadn't even thought about sleep during your secret adventure and though your body was on the verge of giving out, your restless mind was sure to wander all night. And the idea of being alone with your thoughts scared you.

"Actually… I don't think so," you began, fiddling with your fingers in hopes to not let Fred see how much they were trembling. "I doubt I'd be able to get any sleep now."

"Me too, I admit," Fred scratched the back of his neck, uncertain as to how to make the situation less awkward than it was. Trying to get you to talk was hard enough as it was, but your sudden avoidance wasn't helping either. All Fred wished for was to witness the hopeful spark in your eyes, the spark that he had noticed diminish on the first day of school when the unsettling news was announced.

Fred was determined to bring the light back and see your joyous smile again.

Without skipping a beat he said.

"Come with me."

Your eyes shot up in surprise, meeting Fred's for the first time that night. You expected to see the ever-present playful mischief in them, but instead they glistened with something you could not quite recognize. The corners of his mouth had formed a smile, one that didn't intend to mock or provoke in any way, but still contained his usual boyish charm. It was humble and sincere, and along with the anticipating look in his eyes it read.

Trust me.

Your mouth went dry, any and all reasoning to stay vanishing in thin air as you tried to make sense out of your inner conflict. Fred surely wouldn't care if you said no, would he? It's not like he'd be offended that someone like you refused to go with him; why would he even be interested in you in the first place?

But the idea of spending some time alone with him did sound very tempting - you desperately needed some positivity in that moment, feeling exceptionally drained of all your energy after having to witness the emotional and psychological impact of Umbridge's dictatorship. And if there was someone who could lift your spirit even in such dark times, that would be Fred.

Screw the idea of a potential relationship, you needed a friend right now.

"Where to, Weasley?"

Fred grinned at the nickname and shoved hands into his pockets.

"The Astronomy Tower. Are you coming?"

You smiled at him.

"Sure."

It was indeed a brilliant idea to spend the night at the place where anyone rarely ever set a foot. Regardless of it being crowded during classes all day, the Tower wasn't a common choice for students to meet, them much preferring locations like the common rooms, the Great Hall, the school grounds or even the Black Lake. But the Tower did possess a magnetic, obscure charm which many people failed to comprehend and appreciate; charm only meant to lure the wandering souls seeking peace under the stars.

Fred approached the iron railing, breathing in the cold, early spring air, and sat cross-legged on the ground. As he saw you standing a few feet away from him, he patted the empty spot next to him.

"Come on now, don't leave me sitting on my own like that," he joked and his face lit up when he noticed the ghost of a smile on your lips for a brief moment. You joined Fred on the ground, settling on a polite distance from him, and though he was slightly disappointed by the gesture, he was grateful to be in your presence nonetheless.

Silence fell over both of you like soft velvet while you stared off into the horizon; the view reached the Forbidden Forest, the outlines of which had melted into the pitch black sky like ink, the lines between the two practically nonexistent in the dead hours of the night as they blurred into one endless void.

"I don't remember the last time I saw stars on the sky," Fred addressed your ever-listening companions above in a low, hushed voice that caused warmth to blossom within you regardless of the cold surrounding you.

"Me neither," you agreed, nostalgia creeping into you, but you decided you'd welcome it this time. "Such a shame we can't see the moon though."

Your friend nodded, lips pursed into a thin line, "That's because it's currently new moon. We'll need to wait for awhile until it's visible again."

You turned to Fred and the air was knocked out of your lungs. All you could do was silently admire the way the starlight was softening his sharp features and giving his usually flaming red hair a calming shade of copper. His eyes seemed to glow in the dark, and you found yourself coming to the conclusion you had realised long ago.

He was such a beautiful man.

Those glowing eyes landed on yours and you felt your face heat up.

"How are you?" he asked abruptly and you choked out in bafflement.

"Y-You mean, right now? Or in general?..."

"How are you coping?" he rephrased. "You know, with everything going on. I noticed Umbridge bothering you recently."

A shuddering breath.

"I like to think that I'm doing better than others," you nodded hesitantly, finding it hard to sort out your emotions. "I'm more worried about the most vulnerable among us, the youngest students. They're just children. They're the ones that are most terrified. I really hope Dumbledore will be able to do something about it… no matter where he might be right now."

Fred was watching you intently; he did not miss your expression, darkened with concern, nor did he miss your slumped figure, slightly hunched over for a reason he believed was other than exhaustion. Your friend moved closer and nudged your foot with his.

"I don't want you to talk to me about the rest. I want to hear about you. I can clearly see you're being tormented by her."

"As if you're not."

"That's not the point," he insisted and placed a hand on your knee, causing you to face him. His smile was gone. "I need to know how this madness is affecting you."

"I couldn't care less about what that toad puts me through," you shook your head dismissively and shrugged. Why was he getting so worked up about it? "It doesn't matter."

"Of course it does! It matters to me!" Fred hissed in frustration. "Do you think it doesn't hurt me every time I see Umbridge picking at you or calling you for detention? Because it bloody does and you have no idea how horrible it feels to not be able to help you."

He gave your knee a squeeze.

"For once, just for one time, please. Please, stop trying to be the hero of everybody. Believe me, we see- I see how hard you're trying to keep your chin up despite all the shit you're facing, and that's admirable, but right now it's not necessary. Let go. It's just me."

A way too familiar lump formed in your throat and your chest constricted painfully before it harshly dilated, letting out choked breaths. Fred was quick to envelope you in his long arms before your tears even rolled down your cheeks, and when they did, they met his shoulder. Your hands flew around his neck, body falling into his and soaking up his warmth. Fred pressed his soft lips to your temple, calming the racing pulse as you cried freely and unapologetically. Darling, you feel too much.

It's just me.

Your friend didn't let you out of his hold even when your heart-wrenching whimpers were reduced to weak sobs. He continued cradling your exhausted body which was on the verge of completely giving out. But Fred didn't mind, finding astonishing strength in your vulnerability.

After what seemed like hours, you forced yourself to timidly whisper, lip quivering, "I'm scared... And confused."

"Me too, sweetheart," Fred hummed into your ear. "Me too."

You wiped away the trails of dried tears lingering on your face.

"There's just too much going on. Too much that I'm not ready for."

Realization flashed in Fred's brown eyes and they looked down at you with so much longing, sincerity, but also sympathy and understanding.

You weren't angry at him. You were afraid.

And that was alright.

There was enough time, not need for a rush.

Fred had been waiting for years to find out whether his burning feelings for you were reciprocated, constantly suppressing them in fear of scaring you away and losing you. And now that he knew your heart belonged to him like his did to you, all the stars above couldn't contain his untamed happiness, pure and hopeful.

Surely he could wait a little more for you to grow comfortable with your own emotions.

Fred tightened his hold around you and pecked your cheek tenderly, the subtle touch sending a shock throughout your body and subsiding your need for sleep.

"That's alright," he whispered. "Rest now."

@self-ship-love @susceptible-but-siriusexual @hufflexpuff @neovannii

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Masterlist

[fandom-monium]

Alive Together - Day 1

Summary: Welcome to the Monsterpocalypse. You’re a lone wanderer trying to survive. Until you meet Joel Dawson and Boy.

WC: 4k

Tag/Warnings: light themes of death and grief?? Cursing but minimal. Slow burn. Enemies to friends to lovers?

AN: MEET CUTE? NO. MEET UGLY.

(Entry 2#3#)

Hungry. I have nothing else to report today except that I, (Your Name), am starving. Grilled spiders and roasted centipedes are starting to get old.

I've mentioned it before and I'll do it again, but I miss home cooked meals. Even Dad's shoddy attempts at recreating Mom's recipes. The last time I think was… nevermind.

It hurts; I barely remember the last time I had dinner with Dad, much less Mom, flashes of the memories I have left blurring. Probably from the tears. I used to cry at the slightest thought of Mom and then Dad. Now my heart clenches whenever I try because I shouldn't have to try to remember my own family. Believe it or not, it’s progress.

Maybe it's my fault. I hadn't bothered to snag any mementos that reminded me of them before fleeing the bunker, like an album or something. There weren't many personal items that they'd given me, now that I think about it. Too much clutter, the Captain said.

Or maybe it's the lack of consistent stimulus to my brain. I can't read as much as I'd like to, mainly because it's too dangerous to be distracted (constant vigilance is an important virtue in this world, if you hadn’t noticed). Most books that I've stumbled across (literally, I tripped over a hill of hardcovers. Not fun. Very painful) were either tattered or worn beyond comprehension, destroyed by rain or monster attacks.

Speaking of, my stomach grumbled. I need to start hunting before it gets dark... and before I attract another monster to myself. Again.

-(Your Name) (Your Last Name)

Day 1 - First Impressions

You shut the journal as an ominous roar thunders in the distance. Heart in your throat, you’re already on your feet, shoving the book into your pack and gathering the rest of your things. Once you’re certain there’s no trace left of you on the roof, you gaze at the neighborhood below, shielding your eyes as you scan for signs of alerted monsters.

Greenery and ruins go on for miles, unperturbed.

It’s high noon, rays of sunlight seeping through the clouds and warming your exposed skin. A gust of wind brushes your face and hair, and you suppress a smile. It’s not everyday the weather is this nice, and if you didn’t know any better, you’d relish in it.

Good thing you do know better.

You trace your path to the hills. The town is a maze of torn down buildings and overgrowth, winding roads littered with abandoned houses and wrecked vehicles, and, of course, hidden monsters. There’s only a couple hours before nightfall, and you’re far from your destination.

Better start walking. You’ve wasted enough time.

You climb down the side of the dilapidated house, dropping to the ground with a thump. If there’s one thing you’ve learned since the start of the apocalypse, it’s that residential areas harbored the most monsters, aside from the cities. Too many alcoves perfect for nesting. It’s safer away from the old world.

Safer, not safe.

You keep to the shadows, avoiding the open whenever you can despite the barren streets, darting between urban remnants. Your heart eventually settles as you scan your surroundings like anything and everything will pounce on you the second you let your guard down. By the time you cross the residential area and asphalt roads bleed into dry fields (from years of neglect, you somberly note), the sun has crept out from behind the clouds and the sky is clear blue.

You find a barn after hours of trudging through shrubs and your sore feet. It looms at the top of the hill leading to a dense forest, tall enough that as you step into its shadow it blocks out the sun. Walking closer, you tense as you scrutinize the place, eyes combing over the immediate vicinity.

Nothing. Nothing moves or breathes. You don’t see or hear a peep. Not from the barn or the woods beyond. It’s completely isolated from the nearby town, a perfect fort.

Or a nest.

You huff; shit like this has happened one too many times and you’d be a fool if you haven’t learnt your lesson by now. You pull out your javelin and approach with caution, leaves and grass crunching under your boots as you take in the chipped paint and boarded up windows, steadily making your way around the decrepit building. You frown at the clear deterioration, unable to spot any visible breaches.

Reaching the front of the barn, you gaze warily at the lone entrance. Tall doors ajar, old boards are still nailed across the slim gap or hanging precariously. As if someone or something pried them off, busted through.

In or out, you can’t tell.

For a moment, you weigh your options. You doubt the place had anything to offer, pillaged long before you stumbled upon it. Hell, there’s probably a monster nesting somewhere inside, or a bunch of monster eggs.

But you need food, supplies, rest. Are you willing to risk your life on the small chance this rickety barn can provide those things?

You stare down the the opening and it stares back, deceptively innocent. But it’s mocking you, you can hear it. Just daring you to walk away. 

You shuffle on aching feet, making your clothes rub against your sweaty skin.

As if on cue, your stomach growls.

Groaning, you adjust your grip on the spear before ducking inside.

You let your eyes adjust to the dark interior. Light seeps through the rotted ceiling and cracks from the boarded windows, enough that you don’t need a flashlight to see the place is deserted. You glance around the huge room, javelin ready as you wait with bated breath, ears straining to hear over your pounding heartbeat.

Nothing. You don’t hear anything, except the trees rustling outside. Nothing shifts or darts out of sight. No signs of life, not even eggs (that you can see).

It doesn’t mean you're clear, but it’s a start.

Biting your lip, you take a careful step, and another and another, your eyes sweeping the room as you tread over straw and debris. You pause mid-step when you catch a pulley system attached to the ceiling. It’s dark, but you recognize its outline. Frowning, you trace its small, thin woven ropes as they split in different directions against the ceiling and walls, hitting and crossing the floor until they disappear under a thick layer of hay.

You raise your foot, gently kicking away the straw. You step back.

A net. A decent sized one by the width of the patch of hay.

You sigh, shoulders dropping in relief. If you hadn’t been cautious you’d never have noticed it.

You make your rounds quickly as you check for resources. At this point, it’s muscle memory for you as you move through the room with silent purpose, efficient and controlled. You dig through every storage unit, every container, pulling open cabinets and drawers, tearing through the floor with precision as you toss aside rusted tools and empty cans, a pit burning in your stomach. You snarl, throwing down another torn rag. It hits the floor with a thud.

You knew this would happen. You know the chances, but after all this time you still feel the crushing disappointment? You let out a shaky breath, nostrils flaring as you attempt to quell your frustration.

You can practically hear your mother snap at you. Don’t let your emotions get the better of you, (Your Nickname), unless you want to die, her stern voice echoes. You unclench your teeth with a sigh.

It doesn’t take long, your anger simmering down with each exhale, and when you’re sure you’re calm enough, you resume your initial task: scavenging the barn. Is it a waste of time and energy? Yes. Will you find anything useful? Unlikely. Are you going to try anyway?

You head for the stairs to the hayloft. Even if there seems to be nothing left, you need to make sure.

A few minutes later, you're sifting through another trunk when a yelp cuts across the dusty air, followed by the shrill sound of grinding metal. You startle, hissing as you bang your head against the trunk lid. Pushing down the throbbing pain, you snatch your spear and clamber down the stairs, stumbling forward as your eyes darting around the dust drifting in the air. Something barks over you and you look up.

Huh. Did not expect that.

You were prepared for a snarling, limb crushing insect. Or maybe a triple jawed mammal. Even a mega-pig. You’ve seen enough of those and managed.

But a dog? More specifically, a dog caught in the net you barely avoided. It’s tangled in the ropes suspended just above your head, gently swaying. It seems it does not care for the swinging because it starts barking again, louder and more urgent than before.

“Ah, poor doggy,” you croon, lowering your weapon. To your surprise, the dog stops and jerks to face you, its dark eyes gleaming in the shadows. You eye the seemingly calm animal. “Now, how did you get here? Were you following me?”

The dog whines, squirming in a sad attempt to escape. Your lips quirk up. Aside from the occasional bird, you haven’t seen a normal animal in what feels like forever, much less a dog. Most regular animals were consumed by monsters or by people for food.

Food. You haven’t eaten.

You study the dog; its dark brown fur, sleek and short, its body small⎼almost medium sized, with pointed ears and a long snout. And by the way it looks at you, it has some intelligence.

Your stomach grumbles, and the creature cocks its head at you, ears forward.

Shit.

“Oh, don’t look at me like that,” you grimace at the dog, adjusting your hold before aiming the tip at it. “It’s nothing personal, okay? I’m hungry, and you’re the first thing I’ve seen that hasn’t tried to kill me in a while.”

Which isn’t a lie. Hunting is crazy difficult these days. But you swallow as your eyes meet, its stare unwavering like you aren’t pointing a weapon at his little body. Just one motion and you could end its life painlessly (lucky bastard), but your knuckles go white and you grip falters. Why are you hesitating now?

The dog, as if sensing your battle, barks again, this time more composed than panicked, as if trying to communicate with you. You’re grateful you can’t speak Dog. It’s probably saying something like ‘No, you’re better than this’ or ‘Please don’t do this’ or⎼

“Put him down!”

Or that.

Dear Aimee,

Guess what?

I got a dog! And he’s the coolest, his name is Boy.

He saved my life from a giant frog in a pool who tried to eat me with his tongue, and then we hung out in his bus! Man, do we make a great team. We found out that we have a ton in common too. I feel like we can talk about anything.  

You gotta see us out here; we’re like this iconic duo. I don’t know, feels like when we’re together, we’re unstoppable.

“Right, Boy? Boy?” Joel glances at his side, doing a double take. The dog’s gone. His shoulders slump, “Of course, the first friend I’ve made outside and he leaves me. Sounds about right.”

He didn’t think he could gain and lose a friend within the span of two days. This has to be some kind of record.

He jerks when he hears Boy’s faint barking, guiding him as he drags himself back to the old barn they just passed. For good reasons. The decaying barn looks like it’s in need of a new contractor and a paint job… or three. And an exterminator.

God, the surface is terrifying.

Gulping down his dread, Joel crouches to peer through the gaping hole in the wall. This must be where Boy came through. “Whatcha got there?”

The barking ceases, and so does Joel’s heart.

You stand in the dark like an apparition, back turned to him so he can’t make out your features. Your attention is fixed on the shadowed lump hanging over you, and while it’s dark and he doesn’t have a good vantage point, Joel’s mouth goes dry as he seeks out Boy.

Boy woofs again, and Joel’s heart drops. You step closer to the lump.

For a split second, he sees a flash of his mother’s face, her tears streaming down her cheeks.

He doesn’t think; no thoughts, head empty. Blood roars in his ears. His hands tremble. But he doesn’t hesitate, ripping the makeshift crossbow from his back as he scrambles under the opening.

“Put him down!”

He’s not entirely sure what he expects. He’s read enough comic books to understand the situation; the hero drops in to save damsel in distress then proceeds to demolish the bad guys. Technically, he has the upper-hand here. Right?

But realization slams into him. It knocks the air out of him, and he forgets to breathe.

He shouldn’t have barged in like an idiot. He isn’t a hero. He’s nothing like the superheroes in comics and movies and graphic novels. He doesn’t have super strength or speed or highly advanced tech and he sure as hell is not a genius. 

What he does have: a freezing problem.

He’s already lost feeling in his hands, and he almost drops the weapon as you look over your shoulder at him.

On the other hand, you have a pretty clear idea before you face your captor (seeing him now, can you even consider him that?). With the apocalypse, governments crumbled with ease along with laws and morals, so it’d make sense for people to disregard them. You’ve met quite a few… characters, and you’ve chalked it up to these main categories; garbage thieves, sleazy scavengers, and shitty thugs.

In short, humans are selfish creatures. Prepare for the worst.

You’ve thrown down, fought dirty, bartered with them all and still managed to come out on top, the scars across your body a constant reminder. Nothing surprises you at this point.

A fumbling boy though? You mask your amusement, raising an eyebrow as you take him in. The guy, tall and disheveled, blocks the only exit out of this godforsaken place, his red jacket rumpled and dusty like he’s fallen one too many times. However, what nearly sends you is, as he steps further into the light, you bite your lip, his eyes round and small lips pressed together as the crossbow quakes in his hands.

Who let this puppy out of their sight?

“Listen, buddy,” You finally speak, making Joel flinch. Your eyes narrow as his fingers jerk on the trigger. That’s not good. “If you’re gonna point that thing at me, you better know how to use it.”

He sucks in air, clearing his throat as his eyes dart between Boy and you. He cringes when his voice comes out octaves higher than he expected, “Let Boy go.”

“’Boy’?” You glance up, your weapon still raised at the squirming little fellow. “Oh, you mean Dinner?”

“You were gonna eat him?”

You shrug. “Maybe. Depends how this goes.”

“Okay,” Joel swallows, a futile attempt to keep his tone even as nausea sprouts in him. You plan to eat Boy? How can someone eat something so cute? “Let him go, and we’ll leave you alone. How ‘bout that?”

Beads of sweat drip down his temple as his breaths come out shuddered. He’s not used to this; he’s gone from being the chef of his colony to making demands, negotiating with a possible psycho.  He never trained for this! Well, he’d never been trained, period.

What if he says the wrong thing and sets you off, hurting Boy in the process? He might faint⎼no⎼he will faint. He doesn’t think his heart can handle losing more people… or animals. How is he supposed to save Boy? His fingers twitch against the trigger.

You don’t miss it.

“I don't know about that,” You reply, studying him. His hands tremble as they clutch the weapon. He may not be a scavenger or a thief, but that just makes him all the more unpredictable. Goons, you’d expect them to shoot first, ask questions later, but the fact this guy is making an effort to talk? You want to know his angle, his intentions.

Whether it’s good or bad.

“I’m hungry. It’s going to be dark soon, and Boy here,” You jerk your head at the canine, “was unlucky enough to fall into this ol’ trap.”

You watch, withholding a sneer as emotions and thoughts flit across Joel’s face like an open book. It seems a lightbulb goes off because he looks back at you, eyes wide and hopeful. “You want food? I have some in my backpack. If I give it to you, you let him go?”

He tries not to squirm, the little courage he has waning as your eyes bore into him.

“…Put the crossbow and the bag down. Slowly.”

“You too.” You tilt your head curiously as Joel stutters, “Your spear⎼I mean, if you could stop pointing it at my dog. Please.”

Your brows shoot up. Since the moment he entered⎼wait⎼floundered in here, he could not have made it more obvious that he has no idea what he’s doing. If it wasn’t the way he carried that exposed him, it was definitely his facial expressions, and if not his face, you can hear it trickle through the cracks in his voice. Yet despite how unfair the situation is for him, he’s trying to cover his terror. Failing miserably but trying. All for this cute, little doggy.

And he said please. You ignore the way it warmed you, his tone so…. genuine.

Manners, sincere or not, in the face of danger? You have to respect that.

“It’s a javelin, actually, but I agree to your terms.” Your grip slackens. He might be a wimp, but you have to give it to him. He’s got balls.

A flicker of relief crosses his face, and you both comply with your instructions. In spite of his obvious fear, you roll your eyes as he unzips his bag unnecessarily slower than you meant him to, throwing you a look.

On second thought, he’s either really brave or really stupid. It’s fifty-fifty at this point.

Joel pulls out an aluminum can. It glints in the light as he holds it up and tosses it to you. You catch it easily, inspecting it in your hands.

“Now will you let my dog go⎼Boy!” His scream tears through the barn.

You’re already composed. Uncoiling like a snake, you seize your spear and swing, all in one motion. He lunges for you, but you’re too far. He hits the ground.

Groaning in pain, he berates himself. He should have known; they had no reason to trust each other, so of course this stranger, this psycho, would betray him. He tries to brush it off, the false sense of security dissipating, the relief replaced with crushing betrayal and horror. 

This is what the surface is like? His chest clenches. He can’t breath, but this isn’t like when he freezes up on a monster. At least, not those monsters. This is worse. So much worse.

The net rips, then a pained grunt. Joel shields his eyes, burying his face in his hands as tears trail down his dirt-smudged cheeks. His heart thunders in his ears as he prepares for the inescapable sound of Boy’s pained yelps, the squelch of metal piercing flesh. He chokes down a sob.

He only knew Boy for less than two days, but within that timespan he bared his soul to the animal. He probably knew him better than his own colony. In the short time they had together, he became his best friend⎼

Okay, ew. What is licking him?

“Boy?” Joel groans, flinching away as the dog bombards him with wet kisses. “Wait, you’re not dead?”

You step into the light, javelin in hand as you snort, “Of course not. Did you think I was gonna kill him?”

Yes. Joel sits up and cradles Boy to his chest, gawking at you.

You glare at him, almost offended. “I’m not a monster.”

No. No you are not.

Decked in a faded blue jacket, you stand relaxed, spear perched over your shoulder (or a jav⎼java-something). Your eyes glint in the sunlight like steel, hard and piercing, with dark circles under them. You watch him with a slight frown. And like him, there’s smudges of dirt on your face and clothes, but you manage to make it look cool and purposeful.

You don’t look like a monster, but you kind of acted like one. Joel is conflicted.

He opens his mouth to respond, but he's not sure what to say in this situation, overwhelmed by a cocktail of emotions that he’s still coming down from. Before he conjures an appropriate response (is there even one?), you're shouldering your backpack and slipping through the gap. Joel rushes to his feet. “Hey, wait!”

You continue up the hill, not bothering to turn to him as you purse your lips. “Oh. You’re still here.”

“Yeah, I’m ‘still here’! You held my dog hostage; kind of hard to get over,” he grumbles, panting as he trudges after you with Boy at his heels. You’re faster than you look. “So⎼uh⎼where you heading?”

“Away.”

He nods almost sage-like, wringing his hands together. “Cool, cool. So mysterious,” He pauses, inhaling deeply. His voice, now deeper and a bit more relaxed, comes in a rush as he asks, “Is there any chance we could go with you?”

You freeze, and Joel almost crashes into your back. You whirl around and suddenly you’re faced to face, but you’re too astonished by his question to care that he’s in your personal bubble.

His breathes come in heaves. His eyes are big and round, brown and bright with… hope?

It occurs to you that this guy, who hasn’t even given you his name, is a loser. A hopeful, naive loser.

And it’s for that reason you come to a decision⎼you’ll entertain him. 

“Where are you going?”

“West,” Joel’s shoulders hunch, his voice self-assured as he adds, “to the coast.”

Yeah... fuck that. 

You turn to walk away. “No.”

“Wait!”

You glower at him, stopping him in his tracks. “Dude, we got what we wanted. I got food, you got your dog. End of transaction.”

Joel stares at you for a moment, like he’s debating how far he can test you. He seems to think better of it as his shoulders sag and he caves, “Fine, I’ll head west without you. I can do it.” The last part he says more to himself before turning on his heel, starting in the direction opposite of you.

You nod. This is good, for the both of you. And safer, you tell yourself as you turn to begin your trek again. You’re two strangers in the apocalypse; you don’t know who he is, where he’s been, and, from your experience, it’s best to travel alone. It’s inconspicuous, efficient and⎼

Where the hell is he going?

You halt, squinting as you watch him hike away from the west coast. “Hey!”

He looks at you over his shoulder, his face surprised but expectant. Hopeful. He reminds you of a puppy being called over by their owner.

He thinks you’re caving into him.

Well, jokes on you, loser. You raise an eyebrow, “You know that’s not West, right?”

“Oh,” Joel’s eyes widen, clearing his throat. Boy woofs and he shoots him a withered look, altering his trajectory. “I knew that.”

“That’s not West either.”

He switches directions again.

You shake your head. “No.“

And again.

“Nope.”

Joel’s face reddens, unable to meet your eyes as he stops trying so he doesn’t further humiliate himself.

You make your way over to him, rolling your eyes. He seems to make you do that a lot. “Okay, how much food you got on you?”

“Enough to last me a week? Why⎼”

That’s all you needed to hear.

“Then it’s settled,” You decide, clapping him on the shoulder. He winces. “You share your rations with me, and I’ll help you get to the West coast.”

He blinks, clearly taken aback as you begin your trek once again, gesturing him to follow you. You feel his eyes on your back. “Really?”

“Really. You are a food source. Also I’m pretty sure you’d die before getting halfway.” You add, unabashed.

He frowns, unsure whether to be grateful or not. He decides on the latter. “Oh…thanks anyway?”

“You're really not from around here, are you?” You pause, looking back at him.

He scratches the back of his neck. “No. Is it that obvious?”

“Painfully. So free advice,” You, with a hand on your hip and tone clipped, gesture up and down at his⎼well⎼everything. “Try not to let anyone know you’re a newb. Might keep you alive.” With that, you start heading West, not bothering to see if he’s comprehended the note you bestowed on him.

Joel glances down at himself before trailing after you. “Good to know.”

AN: I want to make it clear: I would never eat a dog, you would never eat a dog, no one would ever eat. A. Dog. That was a joke for this part 1. I even wrote emphasis on your character’s hesitation. It’s just that this is the apocalypse, so it’s safe to assume that survivors are driven into corners, desperate and have to make some hard choices.

The end dialogue is reference to @teenwolffanclub-me ​TW rewrite bc i love it and them so if you like Dylan O��� Brien and Stiles pls read their shit. <333

This part is a slow starter, but I don’t want to rush this, your intro and your development. But, now that you’ve finally met, hopefully the rest won’t seem any slower than the beginning.

I’ve never wrote for a lone survivor kind of character before. I hope you enjoyed the intro nonetheless!

I think I’ll forgo the 7 parts idea, but that’s a goal.

Part 2 in progress.

Also, how to get a beta reader??

[xo-cuteplosion-xo]

Falling from grace for you.

(this wasn’t requested, and I should probably be catching up on those XD)

|Dazai x Female Reader|

This is a darker (that’s an understatement…) and longer (very long) piece than what is typically written on my account. It’s taken from one of my current ongoing fics.

Warnings: Dazai’s typical antics (his jokes of suicide, making light of suicide, disturbing thoughts) depictions of severe gore/violence. Mentions of darker themes: torture, implied abuse. Some slight out-of-character actions. A large amount of insanity, questionable thoughts, and in the end suicide. Seriously, I warned you this piece is dark as hell

Heavy angst without a happy ending. (starts getting very dark/disturbing/unsettling under the cut.)

~You have been warned, enjoy the angst love~

Words-5,081

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hiding behind clouds, scarlet red glared down in shimmering beams. The night was given a red hue, a contrast to the normal silver peeking past the darkness. A male, in his early twenties, fiddled with the edges of his coat. Its tan folds, keeping his body from feeling the frigid atmosphere. His finger lightly traced the white, slightly dirtied fabric of the cotton wrapped around his arms. As unusual as it was, most of the agency had stayed past its usual hours of operation. A feeble sigh remained stuck in the man's throat, a sigh that could tell the others he was troubled. He was a man of many mysteries and unsolvable puzzles. The empty hue of his coffee-stained eyes closed the door to what he felt. That was if this man was capable of truly feeling much at all.

Taking a seat on the couch, his mind trailed to the thoughts of a woman. If he dared to admit the wrongs of his life, maybe the situation they were all in would be… different. Maybe, just maybe, this case would have been solved in seconds. It seemed even Ranpo had met his match here. Of course, the only reason he had met a roadblock, was for the same reason nobody had claimed the pool of money placed on his past occupation. His name was Dazai, Osamu Dazai. Sure, by now, the people around him knew what dangerous job he had in the past. Ranpo had probably finally deduced he was somewhere up in the ranks. He doubted they knew just who he had been, doubted they knew the full extent of the crimes he had committed. If they knew surely Ranpo would have said something or given signs of distrust. If Kunikida knew there would have been insults thrown and judgments made. He’d probably be in jail if they truly knew the details about him.

His eyes self-consciously looked up to the clock, his eyes flicking with the smallest flame of confusion. His fingers ran to his pocket, pulling out a phone that wasn’t used for work. The way he rushed to check for a missed message caught the attention of several co-workers. They were all used to his slacking off, even when he was working, he appeared to be relaxing. For instance, this entire time, from the moments spent staring at the window, to the second leading to his hands gripping his phone, were all moments that involved his mind. A plan carefully piecing together. He happened to be the only one who could solve this case. After all, he knew you. The details of this case, the ones that had no evidence, nothing to deduct anything from. By now, he was sure Ranpo knew that too. The only reason he hadn’t been questioned was the uncertainty of how he was involved.

There had never been a day when you missed sending the nightly text. Now, he always received a text no later than 9 PM and no earlier than 8:45 PM. Every day for 6 years, he received the same question. You would ask him when he’d be home, what he’d like for dinner. No matter what the message was, you never sent a text shorter than 2 words. Never screwed the grammar up, nor did you ever leave a text unfinished. Not only was it 9:05, but the text was also missing. He was almost tempted to call you, feeling a panic settling in his stomach. The two of you had so many unspoken feelings between you. He knew you were not really missing, you had run away just over six months ago, after all, you had wanted freedom from the chains of your prison. That home, which had never truly been home. He restarted the phone over and over again, maybe he didn’t have enough service, maybe he was overthinking things? As much as he wanted to believe you were completely fine, he knew something had truly happened to you.

It was his fault, in the past, he had been such a bastard, there were people all over wishing to find a spot in his inhuman mind that would cause him to bend down like a dog; he hated dogs. If somebody ever found that he and you had more than just a business relationship, there would be hell to pay. Having known each other since his mafioso days, you were always a danger to be caught around with. He still remembered the way you had met, the only woman who had not given in to his womanizer ways. The only person on this planet who understood his mind. Your ability, as long as he didn't touch you, told you everything that his mind was reeling under. The pressure of his deepest regrets, the dying, screaming agony that wrapped his heart. So, it was only natural that in his new world of light, he had come to see you differently. This woman who had impacted his life just as much as his dead friend never ceased to surprise him. The way she stayed silent about her own troubles, the way she revealed only what she could with him. The way she remains smiling, like him, despite sharing the same pains that crushed him. He had asked her once, a few years back, to join him in a double suicide. It had been a joke, but the laughing, smiling expression that you wore as a mask had fallen. Those eyes he came to adore fell to replicate his own expression. So used to the word no, his heart nearly shattered when you chuckled darkly and ran a finger over the sleeves of your shirt. The way it acted like it traced scars broke him. The simple sure that whispered from your lips led him to stand shocked. Few people in this world managed to surprise him, so seeing you turn his thoughts into scrambled letters in a scrabble game had him panicked.

Just as he was about to start panicking over your lack of a text, a simple ding echoed in the silent room. The breaths of every agency member halted, it seemed even Kunikida paused to see what this man was up to. For what felt like the first time in his life, that unsettling pit of despair that laid deep within his gut overtook his consciousness rationally. His fingers expertly unlocked his phone, dragging the notification bar down to click on the text that came from your number. That pit that he had been feeling since he left the apartment today rose to consume his mask. Pure, discernible fear placed itself within his irises. The dilation of his pupils, followed by the sweat that fell from his forehead, gathered a panic within every member. Laying on his screen a simple message that he’d never wanted to see; a simple help. The time was now 9:15, Dazai’s hands shook as he tried to remain calm, keep that personality of his from rising past the new him. There was nothing he wanted more than to slip into the darkness of his alter-ego, the original him.

When things that belong to him, things that he deeply connects to are hurt or taken from him, he can’t help but become a monster to protect such things.

Another text followed as he tried to keep himself together. If you want to see her alive, find us within the hour demon prodigy. To send such a thing from his belladonna’s phone created another crack in his expression. Unfiltered rage poured from his eyes in fiery streams. His hands nearly cracked the delicate glass of his phone. Clicking the phone off, he set it down. Walking to his desk, he slammed open every drawer. Nobody spoke, they only watched this man rummage around his desk. His stoic eyes were now full of dreadful emotions. The aura this man was giving off dragged the somber room into a dark state of horror. It was as if a serial killer had walked into the home of its unsuspecting victims. The only thoughts with their heads were of concern for the coworker, whose laid-back attitude had disappeared in seconds. Was this how he was in the mafia? That question suddenly popped into some of the heads turned towards him. One girl sat next to an older boy. The teenage child tilted her head at the recognition of the room's mood. The mood resembled the still air that she’d experienced in the mafia. When she was nothing but a worthless assassin, she had seen this happen before. Whenever a high-ranking mafioso walked into a room, one known for their bloodlust and demonic ways, such as Akutagawa, the room felt heavy and sticky with fear and worry. While this was different, it had that same tingle.

Dazai pulled out a pistol, why he still had this was a question even he couldn’t answer. It had been the one he used in the mafia. Slamming it on the desk, his hand traveled for other items. Grabbing a container of pins, he set that down along with pens in both black and red ink, a notepad about the size of his palm, a file, and lastly, the girl's photo. He grabbed his phone again, this time walking to a computer and downloading information from it. It was easy to get the location of which the texts were sent. If the GPS was correct, her phone was currently several blocks from the house, after moving within the three minutes, it took him to search the drawers. The text had been sent from inside their apartment. Popping the pen lid off using his teeth, he rushed to a map. His mind had blocked all consciousness of the world around him out. The unadulterated need to find you and save you from harm, or in the worst case, death, controlling him. Never in his life had he felt this way for anybody. No subordinate, no friend, no co-worker, no enemy had ever filled his body with so much emotion at once. A man normally dragged on by only logic, a man who discarded his heart for his mind now laid within the opposite. His emotions controlling his thoughts, his heart pumping within the hundreds as he raced against the clock. Marking every move possible in his head, he scanned over the map once, twice, and even a third time. His lips curled into a nasty snarl as he realized how you had been caught.

On your way back from working that bar, you had been followed into the apartment, heard the noises, and texted him a quick plea. You're meant for it to be longer, but hardly had time to send help. No capitalization, no punctuation, and help had been misspelled. A simple typo only your terrified fingers could manage. Then when they realize your phone is unlocked and laying on the floor after knocking you out, the attacker had sent him the warning. With that scenario, he became completely encased in displeased anger. His eyes scanned the map with frustration, trying to narrow the possible routes down. He used the black pen to mark the important events with times. He marked everything from his leave to the current second. Using the red pen, he sketched a draft of the route being used. The phone had been carried as a distraction. Any person of his mind would instantly disregard that route. But without Ranpo needing to point out which route was most likely, he tapped it with his finger. Crossing out certain marks as he intertwined all three routes to come across the place he’d met you. An amused, almost ironic snicker parted his lips as he tugged his jacket tighter around his body. His hand using the small notepad to jot down the location. Not for himself, but for the others in case they decided to follow him.

Walking to his desk, he grabbed the pistol, its weight nearly disgusting him. A conflict parted through him, his promise to Oda, then your life. Looking towards the ceiling, he sighed. He’d visit his grave later to apologize for breaking his promise. He had all intention to kill, whether it’s called for or not. “Dazai, what is going on.” Kunikida's cold voice cut through the heavy atmosphere.

Snapping back as if only now realizing the other existed, he fell to look at Kunikida. The look he gave was full of nothing but emotionless despair. With a simple response, he walked over and dropped the file on the desk. “Taking care of this case… alone.” The last word was spoken with an emphasis as if to warn them. This case was tied to his past actions.

Making a full 180, he dramatically raised his hands and spoke with nothing but a childish facade. “If I’m not back before midnight, my dreams have come true!” he hummed before walking out of sight.

Now that he was alone, that facade dissipated, and he sighed walking briskly down the streets. It didn’t take him too long to arrive at the building. An abandoned shipping room that provided a perfect height for suicide. He smiled slightly at the thought. Yes, that would be so much more relaxing than this. Simply taking your hand as the two of you fell gracefully in each other's arms. Then with no pain, the two of you would part from this meaningless life and find peace. His hand touched the door, pushing them open, the red glimmers of light, provided by the blood moon, filtering in through the now open doors. He whistled to signal he was there, and as his feet stepped inside, the doors closed and latched behind him. A trap well fit for him, but he already predicted such. “You really did go all out to catch me off-guard. It’s too bad this really isn’t much~.” he purred the words calling out to whoever laid within the shadows of the building. Tracing steps of the two men behind him, he ducked before grabbing two fists of hair and slamming their heads together. “Now, I suggest you give her back.” His voice became cold as he held himself straight, brushing his hands against the tan fabric.

Instead of a vocal response made of words, there was only a light laugh. With a sudden glare that nearly blinded him, the light turned on in only one specific spot. The middle of the room glowed with vibrant white light. Revealed by the sudden change was a body. Slumped against a chair with the smallest rising and falling of the chest. A piece of cloth wrapped around both your eyes and your mouth, successfully gagging and blinding you. Around your waist lay a thick rope that was most likely tied in the back, and was coated in duct tape to keep you secured to the chair. He assumed your wrists were bound behind the chair, judging that they were not loosely hung by your sides. The rope around your ankles was wrapped around several times. Already your body was showing forms of bruises. Blood trickled from your nose and your head. Your clothing was in tatters, the white lace of your bra showing in parts. It was as if your attacker had tried inflicting as much pain as he could. Perhaps you had woken up from the pain before passing out. He could see the wet stains on your cheek, probably from the feeling of pain. He went to take a step forward and pull out his gun, but before he could make much movement, a gun aimed itself at you. His eyes flared, and he looked to the man who had taken you. The time was now 10:05 PM. He had arrived exactly at 10 PM. within the hour the text had said, so logically speaking he had 10 minutes until an hour from when the text was sent to now.

So where had he gone wrong? Why did that gun fire at your stomach? It missed anything vital, in fact, it was a spot he knew well. Fyodor had once had a sniper shoot him in that exact spot. He knew it wasn’t lethal, but the blood loss could kill you. That death would be slow and painful. It was pure luck that you had been shot there, that gun was meant to put you to death.

Never in his life had he lost to his emotions. Even in his moments of insanity, he had never acted rashly. Even when he shot a dead body over and over, he had not been completely lost. He had relished in the enemy’s pain, but he was not lost. He understood his surroundings. Even as his lips parted and cusses left his lips and insane demonic laughter parted his lips, he tried keeping his mind together. His left hand covered his eye, the eye he had once kept bandaged for no particular reason. His right hand fumbled for his gun, before snapping his eyes back to the enemy. “You really shouldn’t have done that~” he hummed taking steps closer. “Were you expecting me to fall and weep? If this is revenge over something I did in the past, I hate to tell you… I don't remember a single one of my past victims. I mean that would be a ton of people to remember. Between the murders and the blackmail along with all the other crimes I’ve committed, I would never remember anybody who held no importance.”

With the room's descent into a hellish atmosphere, your attacker tripped falling down. Dazai walked to you and brushed a finger over your cheek. “It’s alright, I’ll save you.” Maybe this possessive protectiveness this event had induced could be classified as slightly yandere? He would never lose you, your happiness was of course important, but this feeling was beyond normal rage. He walked up to the cowering form of your attacker. He guaranteed the man's death would be painful. He normally wasn’t this violent, even in the mafia he carried out his assignments and assassinations quickly. He hated pain himself, so it was natural to show some pity when it came to physical pain.

All that went forgotten as he approached the shaking male. He fiddled with the trigger of his pistol, before shooting both of your attacker's hands. Watching as crimson carefully spill and the shriek of horror, that twisted Dazai’s heart with pleasure, echo within the walls, he smiled. The smile was created from pure insanity. Without a shred of remorse, he glanced at you before his foot lifted to slam against the male's jaw. He did it once, twice, and thrice. When his foot shoved the man's skull down to the cement flooring, he laughed trying to keep control. His emotions were slowly wrapping dark webs around his reason. He knew that was enough, that he should stop and lay down a final blow. He knew he should do the right thing, which would be to slam some cuffs on this man's wrists. Yet, in the back of his head lay a voice telling him this man deserved a punishment far worse than a jail cell he’d likely be out of in a few years. This man deserved death for hurting you. There was only one light in his life, that light was you. Losing that light would break him. There was one fear for this man, that fear was losing all hope. Plummeting into true pain, a life without you would be empty. It would be too much to go on. He’d toss away his ideal death to escape the chains of this mortal world. He’d accept death, whether there was an after-life or not. As the thoughts ran rampant inside his head, his decision was made. No, this decision had been made the moment his slender fingers touched the metal of this discarded pistol.

Kneeling down, he got into the man's personal space, his hands clasped behind his back as if this were one of his many interrogations. “Tell me, when you laid the first blow on my belladonna, what were you expecting would happen? Was it A, you thought you would manage to bring me to my knees? Or maybe B, you thought your actions would have no consequences because the feared demon prodigy was now an ex-demon prodigy? You thought you would be able to act out revenge by taking the one thing he clings to. People are easy to read, when they are terrified for their lives their life story is portrayed through their eyes. I wonder, would you beg for mercy if I gauged them out?” the sadistic curl of his lips leading to the crack of his fingers echoed in the room. The only other sound to challenge such a disturbing noise lay the whimpers and shaking chatter of the enemy. “If you want forgiveness, then beg for it.” Dazai's lips quickly fell to a snarl as his finger ran from the man's cheek up to the base of his eye socket. Already pushing with pressure, he waited. Just before his finger could start any damage, the man's words leaped.

“I’m sorry, spare me!” he would shout more and more pleading for his life. Dazai merely laughed, running his other hand over the man's lip before dragging it down over the man's neck, imagining the sight if he were to take a pin and drag it along the skin.

“Did she plead for you to stop? How many times did she beg you not to hurt her? Did you do more than simply hit her?” he knew the answer to that already, which is why even if this man pleaded and begged and swore his life to Dazai, he’d never make it out alive. “If you're honest, I may… be gentle.” A lie, a believable cunning lie all for you. He was doing this for you, all to take revenge for you.

“No!” the man screamed for only a moment before Dazai dug his finger into the socket, letting blood soak the tan of his coat. Flinging his hand to the side, the excess blood splattered.

“Too bad, I knew you'd lie to me anyways. Humans are truly despicable creatures, aren't we? Was it fun? Listening to her beg for you to stop? Did she ask you to just kill her already? Did you keep her conscious just to traumatize her? Tell me, did you think I'd let you go?” lifting his foot, he slammed it against the man's chin, sending him into the wall. Watching the stone crack and small pebbles fall, he walked over with nothing in his eyes.

His thoughts were blank.

His expression is blank.

His mind blank.

His heart… full of anger and merciless vengeance.

His hands, despite lacking the same strength as some of his opponents in the past, snapped bone after bone. He tore through the skin until the floor was coated in blood. The game continued until the man bled to death. When Dazai noted there was nothing left, he stared and watched in satisfaction. That was until a groan made its way into his ears. Slowly, he turned around to look at you. Your head had shifted slightly, but small drops of crimson were now dripping down from your abdomen. Pulling the bloodied knife from the corpse, he rushed over to cut you free. Letting your body collapse into his he hummed. His mind was still gripped in insanity. He slid down to the ground, running his blood-stained hands through your hair. “I came for you.” A half-hearted smile lifted his lips, but your voice did not respond. Your eyes still remained closed as he laid you on a clean spot of cement. He lifted the tatters of your shirt just enough to view the wound.

With a hesitant movement, he grabbed your wrist. The pulse was seeming to slow down. “Fuck…” he cursed the word under his breath as he came back to his senses. As if coming from a trance, his eyes scanned around. A single drop of water left his eyes before more came crashing down. He grabbed your body and pulled it towards him. Cradling you as he whispered an apology.

It seemed as if an eternity had passed, but in reality, the time was 10:35. Hardly half an hour had passed since he arrived. You would last another twenty minutes before that tiny wound became a problem, and you died. He knew this fact, and so he searched his pockets for his phone. He’d disappear before anybody got there. He’d sound as if he were running. He’d stage something to hide what he had just done. Everything he’d worked for could be unraveled soon. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, hoping you'd wake up, so he could tell you what he wanted to say. Even as he gripped the phone and dialed his co-workers, all he wanted was to look into your eyes. The eyes that reflected himself. Before he could hit the dial button and start the call, those metal doors which had been sealed shut opened. Light filtered in from the moon and flashlights. The click of guns pointed at the two of you.

Dazai glanced to the side before hiding you behind him, still protective over you. Until he heard the sound of a familiar blonde's voice, he would not let you be exposed to danger. “Stand down, he’s… one of ours.” Kunikida yelled, before storming in with the other members behind him. They had all seen him rush out, the state he was in… it was only recommended by Ranpo they call in some officers just to surround the building. “Dazai...” Why was it so hard for the blonde to speak? Had he truly believed there was a shed of moral sense within his work partner? “Hands above your head… step away from the girl.'' It was a plea more than an order.

Hesitation wasn’t something he normally dealt with. Dazai looked back to you before realizing the smallest movement of your fingers. Immediately he grabbed your hand. A warning shot echoed missing his head by mere centimeters. It wasn’t like he cared though, a bullet could kill him right away. There would be no pain, so what if it wasn’t suicide. At this point, he was fed up with living in a world like this. He was tired of not having a purpose. The only purpose he had was to protect you. He’d managed to fail that too. So without any emotion, he waved dismissively. “If you shoot me, you know I won’t care right?” There was silence as a gurgled noise escaped your lips.

It was relatively fast, your eyes shooting open as your hands reached to grab your abdomen. Nearly screaming out in pain until your eyes adjusted and noticed Dazai. Relief flooded into you as your body weakly reached for him. He let out a relieved choked noise, similar in sound to a sob. He cupped your cheek with that feeling in his chest before another warning shot fired. This time missing him by even less and cutting it close to your hands. Terrified your body reeled back.

Dazai put your safety first before comfort. So despite wanting to kiss you and finally express the feeling he knew you were aware of, he stood up and raised his hands above his head. Walking towards the lights, he kneeled and hung his head. He was rather surprised with how gentle he was pushed to the floor. The feeling of metal clasping his wrists wasn’t new. He’d been caught many times before this. Of course, he always escaped, returning to you. If he tried that now, he knew he risked your safety. Yet your shrieks passed the air as you were grabbed by two officers. Watching from the sidelines with solemn looks stood the rest of his co-workers. Atsushi, a young male orphan, Dazai, had been saved from starvation and death, couldn't understand what was going on. “Why… Dazai, why?” he whispered far too soft to be heard.

As Dazai was pulled to his feet and led away, you were left to scream and ignore the pain of blood gathering in your throat. No matter how much splattered from your lips you screamed for him. You struggled weakly against the arms of the officers. The blonde who had cuffed Dazai walked to you. Kneeling to your level, your eyes moved to read him. Using your ability to see his emotions, personality, and troubles. He was a good man, one who had strong morals. Only at that did you react and calm down. Letting a woman who shared his presence and whose aura you trusted heal you. “This is… my fault,” you whispered, finally feeling warmth fall down the soft skin of your cheeks. As a brunette looked over the crime scene with anger and disgust, he deducted everything within minutes. It was done by Dazai, and there were things he didn’t understand, but he knew enough to locate why this had happened.

“Please… don’t lock him away! If I had been stronger... if I had listened to Dazai’s advice none of this would have happened!” Despite being the victim of all of this, you couldn’t help but blame it all on yourself. “We still haven't gotten to try out the method I found.” gripping the sides of your arms, you looked up with the same expression Dazai often wore. The startled expression of his co-workers was expected. “We may have succeeded this time.” You whispered the words softly in your head, before passing out from exhaustion once more.

Dazai never ended up in prison, he’d slipped away the moment he could. All of this had been in your line of expectations. Walking into the apartment to see Dazai reading the suicide book had you running over to express your love in the form of asking him the question he always asked you. “Shall we commit a perfect, flawless double suicide?” you asked before seeing an excited glimmer in his eyes. Taking your hands in his, he nodded.

On that fateful night, two months after your abduction, two bodies were found. Cuddled close together under the sheets. Their bodies cold and pressed closed. A swift easy death within slumber.

[fandom-collective-writers]

Bonding a Mate

Fandom: Ikémen Sengoku Suitor: Kenshin Uesugi Author: @otome-smut-queen Tags: Dubcon, ABO, smut, breeding, bondage, modern AU, NSFW, impregnation, Alpha/Omega

Mai wrinkled her nose as the stench of Alpha flooded the room. She had come to her friend’s bar to escape the coupling going off back at her house, though she was still doubtful that Hideyoshi even knew that she wasn’t in the house after causing a problem at work with her post-heat pheromones. Despite working for Nobunaga Oda for several years, she had been able to hide her true secondary nature from all of the high-level management she worked as a personal assistant to. Until the previous month when she had her first full-blown heat and had been unable to do anything except try to sate herself in bed. Now she was dealing with the usual bull that came with Alphas trying to tell her that she wasn’t capable at her job and she should just ‘settle down’ and let someone else have her job who could provide for their family that way. It made her angry. The only saving grace was the part where her boss didn’t care about her secondary gender. He only cared for the quality of her work, which only suffered when toxic Alpha managers would suddenly come up to the CEO and Director floor to tell Mai about why they should be dating. He had issued a company-wide directive that afternoon after she had been pinned in the corridor and intimidated, Mai was not to be approached unless they were willing to risk their jobs. It was likely to go unnoticed until Nobunaga fired someone for that reason, but she was glad her boss had faith in her still.

She groaned and necked back the remainder of her rum and coke. If the Alpha group were anything like those at her workplace, then she would be better off going home now.

Then Kanetsugu grabbed her hand, stopping her from leaving the bar. His silvery hair usually framed an icy pair of purple eyes, but he wasn’t looking at her with them for once. The bar dropped a few drops very swiftly, making her shiver before the sound of Kenshin’s footsteps broke the spell that Kanetsugu had weaved over her body’s inability to move. She swallowed nervously as Kenshin’s hand replaced Kanetsugu’s on her forearm. Then she was led down the bar, her arm lifted over the pumps and tills as the room watched the display of dominance silently. Mai didn’t dare to look over her shoulder as they reached the end of the bar, and the door to the employee-only area was opened by Kenshin. He scoffed loudly and pushed Mai through first. She caught a glimpse of a group of Alphas, probably the same group that she had smelled entering the bar, and they had been positioning themselves to make a move on her from their positions in the room. She swallowed nervously, looking up at her friend and waiting for the explanation. She trembled slightly, not because she was scared of Kenshin, but because she was so angry that strange Alphas thought they had the right to do as they pleased to her.

“I’m so weak, this is disgusting,” she scoffed, before Kenshin wrapped her up in his arms, stroking her hair out of her face.

“You need to be more aware of your surroundings. You smell of Omega right now,” he commented sharply, rubbing her back to help soothe her. He was also pumping out his scent, designed to calm down any distressed Omega and make them pliable to his commands. “I’m taking you back to my place. You’ll hold on tight to me on the back of my bike,” he instructed, already manoeuvring Mai through to the staff room where he picked up his motorcycle helmet and a spare one he kept at work for these occasions. Not that Mai thought anything of his actions, her body reacting like a puppet on strings as Kenshin gently pushed the helmet onto her head and helped secure it before the two were on the bike and speeding off through the city’s streets. The streetlamps twinkled as they zipped through the corners, Mai holding on firmly to Kenshins’ waist as he had told her to. She was only in jeans and a blouse since she hadn’t been able to get changed before escaping out of her house several hours before, but she melded herself to the Alpha to protect herself from falling off.

It had been a while since she had been at Kenshin’s apartment. A modern, top floor, two-bedroomed home with every gadget possible it seemed as Mai put the helmet down on the sideboard next to Kenshin’s. He watched her silently, waiting to see what she did while guarding the front door so there was no escape for her.

She stretched her arms out, rolling her shoulders to release the tension as she looked out over the Kyoto skyline. There was something beautiful and memorising about the scene as she gazed out of the window. Kenshin purposefully pumped out his scent, keeping her pliable as his arms slid around her from behind, holding her body against his. She groaned softly as his lips brushed her neck, her head tilting to the side to give him plenty of access. Her eyes fluttered shut as his lips kissed up to her jaw, a soft growl down her ear sending shivers down her spine as Kenshin felt her ass push back against his hips. He smirked to himself as he turned her head and claimed her lips possessively. Mai was completely at his mercy as the Alpha parted from her, ignoring her whines as he picked her up roughly and stormed through to his bedroom.

“Strip,” he grunted his command, pulling away from her only for long enough to check that he had locked the front door. He had been watching Mai carefully since they had reunited after her career brought her to Kyoto once she had completed university. He had kept every suitor away from her, and thankfully her stupid bosses had never made any attempt to woo her. But he had waited patiently enough, and now she was his as he came back into his room.

Her nervousness was adorable, she was down to her underwear as Kenshin quickly stripped, his clothes left in a trail from the door to the bed. He kissed her with a passion that threatened to burn them both, leaning over her and pulling open a drawer in his bedside table, purposely obscuring her view of it as he pulled out the restraints. He looped them through his headboard bars, one eye on the writhing Omega underneath him and the other on his hand that was keeping hold of her wrists before he had her locked in them.

Mai squeaked, tugging reactively on the material cuffs as she glanced up to see what Kenshin had done. Not that Kenshin minded, since it left her neck open to his markings. He groaned as the soft floral of cherry blossoms came from her scent glands, his cock throbbing and desperate to be touched as he continued to kiss down her skin.

He used raw strength to break through the centre of her bra, and then snapped the straps to toss the offensive item clear of the bed. Her confusion was cute as Kenshin took a nipple into his mouth, using his tongue and teeth to tease it into a hard peak, his mismatched eyes watching Mai’s expression change to one of bliss. Her hips rutted up, groaning as Kenshin’s nimble fingers slowly began to tease her clit through her panties. He smirked as she whined in frustration that he wasn’t touching her directly and chuckled softly.

“I told you to strip, and you didn’t get fully undressed, so this is your punishment,” he stated simply, before turning his attention to her neglected nipple. He used his tongue to roll it between his teeth, sucking and nibbling on her skin, as the pad of his middle finger circled against her clit, using the wet fabric to deny her what she really wanted. He knew that she was close to being open to anything he said, her secondary nature was taking control and leaving her free to his will. He needed her to say that she was his, to mark her up and to never leave as the blush on her cheeks started to darken.

“Kenshin, please, Alpha, I’m sorry,” she stuttered, the words falling out of her mouth as she pulled on the cuffs. Her hips rutted and writhed against the bedsheets, trying to work the offending item of clothing down. He kept her legs pinned under his body as her moaning increased in volume, it was getting harder to not just tear the panties off her as Kenshin weighed up the idea in his mind. No underwear would mean that Mai would need to wait in for him to get what she needed, it would mean that she couldn’t leave until the world knew that she belonged to him.

He couldn’t wait any longer, as he pulled so harshly on the fabric that it tore under the pressure, and left marks on her hips. He would apologise later and make her think it was unintentional. Mai was producing so much slick, she would be able to take him as he parted her legs. It was a view that he never wanted anyone else to see unless Kenshin was the one breeding her.

“Kenshin,” she whined, wriggling underneath him. It was cute, she was trying to flip herself over to present for him like a good little Omega would do. He would have to try that position next time as he smiled down at her, her breasts now shiny with his spit and the desperation evident on her face before he thrust his whole length into her core in one swift motion. Mai cried out in delight, her pussy filled with Alpha cock, and a nice thick one at that, this was meant to be her position in life. Kenshin knew that he needed to put his pups in her as he rocked his hips swiftly against hers. He needed to breed her as her neck was bared to him, his hands pinning her legs back to her torso as he started to slam harder and faster into her. The way she squeaked and moaned was addictive, it was cute how she babbled about needing to cum, he knew that his knot was starting to bloom before he growled possessively and sunk his teeth into the crook of her neck.

It was a white-hot ecstasy that exploded inside of him. His teeth pierced her skin at the same time that his knot popped inside of her core, Mai’s screams of pleasure threatening to bring the apartment block down while she spasmed around his cock as it poured his cum into her. He had slid an arm around her back to hold her close to him as they rode out their mutual climax. His tongue lapping at the freshly laid mating mark over her scent glands on her neck, his Alpha nearly content to bask in the afterglow. He nudged her face towards his glands, nipping at her tender skin as a hint before Mai returned the favour. They would be locked together for a little while, his cock was keen to keep her pussy full of cum for the moment as Kenshin kissed Mai on the temple.

He could hear her brain starting to clear and work out what was happening.

“Shhh,” he soothed, pumping out his scent to keep her placid. “I’m looking after you now. There’s nothing for you to worry about, you’ll be kept with me, just nice and pregnant with my pups, doesn’t that sound so nice? Nothing to worry about and no other Alphas to run from,” he purred as her brain slipped back into Omega mode, accepting the affection from her new mate. He’d get her to comply easily enough, she was safe now with him.

[oigimi]

. owlet .

. mozart and baby oc . found family . 1.9k words .

here’s a found family fic that’s been in my head for awhile now! i really hope you like it. mozart seems like the kind of guy to have a daughter

A cry filled the mansion’s halls, piercing the ears of all who heard it. It was relatively late at night, and everyone was gathered at the front door, staring at quite the unusual package. Gifts and shipments would grace the mansion’s front doors often, but this… this was something entirely different. Rather than a case of Rouge or Blanc, or a bouquet of roses or anything in the ordinary, the residents of le Comte’s mansion stood in front of a baby girl in a basket, with a tag attached reading, “My name is Asuka. Please take care of me.”

“Asuka… Just like- Ah, never mind,” Sebastian started, waving his hand. He bent down to pick the screaming infant up, only to have her screech even louder, and swat her hands around in an angry little tornado.

“Sebas, you’re holding her wrong! You need to-” Arthur’s attempts at calming Asuka were even more fruitless, with her fighting to wriggle out of his arms. He passed her on to Theo, who scared her. She was given to Comte, then Leonardo, then eventually everyone in the room before being returned to her basket.

Vincent looked downwards, his mouth tugged downwards in a frown. “What do we do? I feel so bad for her, she won’t even stop crying. Poor little baby…”

“Broer, she tried to bite you!”

“She’s just little and scared! You were like that too once, Theo.”

As the younger brother clammed up, a final face showed itself that hadn’t been present before.

“What’s all this noise? Whatever you’re all doing, can you wrap it up soon? Or perhaps be a little quieter?” Mozart hissed, marching right up to his roommates and their new problem. He caught sight of Asuka and wrinkled his nose. “Arthur, did one of your little flings catch up with you?”

“No! She’s just a darling little thing that showed up on our porch and we simply can’t get her to stop crying. If you want to get her to be quiet, why not try and hold her?”

Mozart looked at the screeching infant, whose face was reaching a color as hot and fiery as her hair. “No,” he simply said. Babies were messy and loud and provided everything he didn’t want in his life. But, Arthur was right. If there was any way he could try and fix the problem, it was to try and hold this thing. Mozart took a deep breath and took the baby out from the basket, shaking his head and awkwardly cradling her in his arms. “There… there. I suppose.”

“You’re supposed to bounce her,” Vincent chuckled, guiding Mozart into rocking Asuka to the rhythm of his heartbeat. “Just like that.” They looked down, and everyone’s faces melted into shock when Asuka finally stopped crying. Her big, glossy blue eyes were coated with tears, but she stared up in wonder at Mozart, or rather the feather in his jacket. She reached her tiny hand out to grab it.

“No. You’re just going to put it in your mouth and get sick.”

Asuka scrunched her face and pouted, reaching a little harder for the feather. She fussed, to which Mozart simply scoffed.

“No.”

“No!” she echoed, shaking her head. “No, no!”

“She’s already learning to speak like him,” Arthur snickered. “Oh, isn’t that just precious?”

Mozart glared at him as he tried to keep the baby away from his feather. He sat down on the couch, holding Asuka away from his body as if she carried a disease. “How long do I have to hold this thing?”

“Until she goes to sleep. Mozart, can’t you take care of this baby for just one night until we can figure out what to do with her?” Comte asked, tilting his head to the side. “It would mean you can get to your music faster, anyway.”

He looked at Asuka, who was still making fruitless attempts to obtain Mozart’s jacket feather, scowling in contempt at her. “Fine. But only for one night.”

“We all know how ‘just for tonight’ goes. You’ll be with her on her wedding day now!” Dazai mused, earning another deep scowl.

“I am not fathering this child.”

Asuka began to fuss, wriggling around and squirming in Mozart’s arms. He moved his arms so that she was gently pressed against him. “There… I suppose.” He swayed his body to the rhythm Vincent showed him, slowly patting her back. Before he knew it, she was yawning and her grabbing began to stop. “Hm. I’m putting her down to bed. Then I’m going back to my music.”

“Are you sure you should leave her alone? I think she’s gotten quite fond of you!” Arthur chuckled. “You might just wake her up if you leave.”

“Are you serious?” He groaned and looked down at the baby. “I guess I’m going to go to sleep too. The sooner I sleep the sooner time moves forward. Goodnight.”

Without another word, Mozart made a quick stop in the kitchen to warm up some milk. He swiped some chocolate, and glanced down at Asuka. She looked so… relaxed. So cute, even. Mozart couldn’t deny that he didn’t like babies, but the child he held in his arms felt a little different. He didn’t like her very much, but he couldn’t let anyone else take care of her. For some reason, it felt warm in his chest when she would only relax in his arms. As if he was meant to be her father in some way.

He grabbed a second, little cup with this in mind.

When he got to his room, Mozart made a tiny bed on the carpet with layers and layers of blankets and pillows, and laid Asuka down in it. She stirred, and made little cries in her sleep. Was she upset that Mozart had set her down? Could she even tell? It didn’t matter, he still felt a little bad for her. “We’ll get you a proper bed tomorrow. I couldn’t put you in a drawer or in your small basket,” he sighed. “You’re annoying and I don’t like you, but you’ll get a crib tomorrow. Goodnight, owlet.”

------

The next morning was full of diapers, crying, hissy fits, and screaming. Sebastian had run to pick up some basic supplies, but it ultimately did very little in the vampires’ battle against a fussy baby. She didn’t like peas, she didn’t like corn, and Vincent had to learn that babies can’t eat pancakes. What could she eat that would make her happy?

“Warm milk,” Mozart huffed, taking some off the stove. He poured some in the little cup he’d carried and let it cool off to a safe temperature. With some strict, yet gentle coercion, he managed to bring the cup to Asuka’s lips and help her drink as much as her tiny stomach could handle. “What was so hard? Babies like milk.” He grumbled a bit and cleaned out the cup. “Morons.”

“Well well well! You really are like a natural father to her!” Dazai chuckled. “What did we predict?”

“Nothing. I’m just not a fool,” Mozart snapped back, lifting Asuka out of the chair and burping her. “The plan today is to get some more supplies. But I am shopping for them.”

“Are you sure you do not want anyone to help carry anything?” Jean mumbled. “I can hold items at the store for you and help take them home.”

“That would be great, thank you.”

Jean’s workplace ended up with a bit more than he expected, with a nice crib and mobile and a lot of bottles and sippy cups. The Frenchman blinked at the juxtaposition between the baby supplies and the items of war he sold in the shop. Mozart mentioned only taking care of Asuka for a few days. The abundance of furniture seemed like overkill.

At a nearby store, Mozart stood next to a stroller with his fussy responsibility inside. He scanned the shelves for toys, putting a set of blocks, paints, and a few stuffed animals inside. He stopped, however, when he laid eyes upon a stuffed snowy owl. “Just like Schelm…” he chuckled. He took the toy off the shelf and held it to Asuka. “Do you want an owl? An owl for the owlet?”

“Ow,” she replied, reaching out for the toy. “Ow!”

“Is that your way of saying ‘owl’? Alright, here you go. Be nice to it.” He paid for the toys and found himself looking in the stroller at the baby. She was cuddling her new toy and inspecting its wings and rubbing it, inspecting it for anything of interest. “It’s just a stuffed animal. Silly,” he chuckled. “Let’s get you home now. I have a feeling you’ll start screaming here in a moment.”

By the time night had arrived, the crib, bookshelf, mobile, and toys were all set up. Asuka was shaking a rattle on the floor when Mozart picked her up. “Alright, it’s time for bed. Come on.”

“Noooo!” she cried. “Nooooooo!”

“Yes. Come on.”

She fussed and began to cry, reaching down at the floor for her rattle.

“No rattles in bed,” Mozart huffed. “Here, I have something you can take in bed.” He reached down on the floor and handed her the stuffed owl. “Here. Your owl.”

“Ow.”

“That’s right. Your ow,” Mozart chuckled, setting Asuka down in the crib with her stuffed toy. “Goodnight, Asuka. You’re a silly little owlet who needs plenty of sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

With that, he wound up a music box and turned off the lights.

------

“Papa, can I get the first slice?” Asuka asked, beaming wide at a large cake in the kitchen. “Better yet, I want the whole thing!”

“You can’t have the whole cake because you’ll get sick. You have my sweet tooth.” Mozart finished moving the cake to the table and sighed, “I can’t believe you’re sixteen years old now.”

“Old enough to get a boyfriend!”

“Let’s not go that far.”

“But you said when I turned sixteen I could!! Papa, you’re being unfair.”

Mozart chuckled and ruffled his daughter’s hair. “Alright, go sit down at the table.”

She did as she was told and grinned, admiring all the presents everyone in the mansion had bought for her. From personalized books from Uncle Arthur to a paint set from Uncle Vincent to expensive clothes from rich Uncle Comte, Asuka was surrounded with so many luxuries given to her by the people who loved her. She was adopted into the greatest family she could imagine, and by the best father she could ever want. Sure, Asuka had a bit of an attitude sometimes, but she always knew when the important things needed to be said.

“I love you Papa,” she murmured, getting up and hugging Mozart. “Thanks for taking care of me, and thanks for all the birthday gifts.”

He smiled, embracing his daughter tightly in his arms. “I love you too. I love you so, so much, Asuka. You gave my life and music meaning like no other… Are you crying?”

“N-no! I don’t cry!”

“Okay.” He kissed his daughter’s forehead and sat down at the table. “No matter how old you get, whether you’re sixteen or sixty, you’ll always be my little owlet. I love you so much, and happy birthday.”

[cleololax]

Lotto | A | Chapter One

MafiaBoss! UndergroundCriminal! Yoongi x Strugglingwaitress! Y/N

Word Count - 3,210

Yoongles has his silver hair in this one 👌🏼. Smut will be in future chapters. Enjoy !

The smell of grease and bacon has your brain pounding in your skull. A normally pleasant smell can get old after an 8-hour work shift, 5 days a week. Dave rings the bell once again and you zig-zag between the tables trying to get there, refilling empty coffee mugs and fetching missing condiments on the way. Another day, another measly dollar.

By noon, your feet need a rest and you need a break. The sneakers squeeze your feet so much it feels like they might bring you down a size permanently. Marla comes from the back, chewing that cheap gum that’s bought wholesale. You hand over the paper tab and fill her in before heading into the back room. Lunch is spent eating a stale sandwich with stale lettuce and softening tomatoes that can leave an unpleasant aftertaste. Mentally, there’s a reminder set to see what they have at the food pantry this week.

Hopefully, your brother ate his lunch. It’s not like he likes it anyways and you can't blame him for it. Anxious thoughts are interrupted when Mina opens the door in all of her cheerfulness.

“Y/N, someone is asking for you.” She must see your furrow brows cause she continues.

“Says he needs to see you, it’s been a while. Is he a bad ex? Should I get rid of him?” Her worry makes you inwardly smile and you head to the sink. “No, it’s ok. I’ll be right there.” She leaves with a nod. The smile drops the minute she does. What could he possibly want now? Something uneasy stirs in your stomach. It could be the food just devoured, but there is something more pressing at the moment. The dim hallway is empty and you carefully walk out, counting the black and white tiles. With your head held high, you walk towards the booths.

The blue hair peeks out from the top of the divider. He always sits in the left corner of the room, drinking a lemonade. Always at the same time. Always on time. You walk towards the table and sit down. Taehyung offers a small nod of his head in acknowledgment. Or at least that’s what he says his name is. The first time he had waltzed in, he turned heads. A beautiful man in a crisp Armani suit isn’t exactly discreet. You came out to greet him and asked if you knew each other when he uttered one word. Your father's name. From then on you knew whatever came of this interaction, it wasn’t going to be pleasant. That bastard had ruined your family and still, it's not enough. He continues to cause destruction, long after he’s been gone.

Taehyung's tan skin and blue hair are a striking match. Chocolate eyes study the way you clench your hands together on the table, steadying shaky fingers. Pretending to hold it all together.

“Hello, Y/N.” He asked for your name the first time and you refused to give it. Years of watching sketchy people walk in and out of your apartment teach you to be wary. By the next meeting, he had it on his tongue in greeting. Perhaps a show of how much they really knew and were able to find out what they wanted.

“I have a note for you from Mr. Min. It’s appropriate to now set up a formal meeting. Tonight.” The previous suspicion is proved correct. This elusive Min wants to meet and it has your heart sinking.

“I have my brother to pick up from school.�� Demons may thrive and bath in the night, but the rest of us don’t have that luxury to choose.

“Sorry, but you’ll have to make arrangements. We could send one of our men to do it... if you want.” Absolutely fucking not. You may be bad at surviving, but stupid is not in your nature.

“I’ll work it out.” It's the first time you keep eye contact with him since he arrived. While he notices the sudden determination, you notice the prominent mole on his nose. He’s handsome in a catalog type of way. they must have to be, to make the jobs easier. His tan skin glows, even in the gloomy shadow that the grey skies cast into the room.

“There will be a car parked outside your residence to pick you up.” Being in a car with these people doesn’t seem like such a good idea, either. The next words are painful to say.

“It’s ok, I’ll walk.” He quirks a brow and looks sideways at the droplets sliding down the window.

“It’s going to be raining heavy tonight, though.” His deep voice fills you with dread. Especially because there is an underlying tone of sympathy in it. On cue, lightning roars from somewhere above the popcorn ceiling. Hopefully, it’s enough to distract him from the fidgeting.

He gets up to leave but not before looking down at your slumped form, trying to ignore how tired and pitiful you look. Deliver and leave. That’s the job as a messenger. All of the five times he has come here have made him wonder who you are. What put you in the sights of a man like his employer. You are young, but there is so much sadness already. Ironically, he knows how you must feel. Against his better judgment, he fixes his collar and is gone as quickly as he came. Don’t ask, don’t get involved with the debtors. It’s easier that way. All you can do is place your head on the table and zone out for a little. It’s the go-to self-care these days. Just to pretend that you don’t exist in this form in time, that you can blend in with the background and disappear. Not for the first time, you curse your luck, family ties. What have I been roped into?

When the sun sets, your legs are already carrying you down the street before Lina can change her mind. Thankfully, it isn’t pouring down yet. Closing the diner is normally your job and it is a dreaded task. Anything can happen in that timespan and it keeps the adrenaline constantly flowing. A girl alone in a diner with a cash register is a golden opportunity. It’s hard to feel like beyond the windows there aren’t eyes, waiting in dark street corners. After a couple of blocks, the old orange apartment building comes into view. At one time it must have been nicer and that's hard to picture. Mr. Shihan is playing cards with another older man on the sidewalk when you come up to the gate. Their concentration is fully on the game and he doesn’t give his normal greeting. He’s a sweet man with a terrible habit. The courtyard is empty. There are barks and kitchen sinks running, loud televisions that have no consideration. Unfortunately, there are no stairs and after long days, it’s hard not to just want to sit down on the dirty, concrete floor and fall asleep. Before you reach the 5th floor, you wait at the entrance to the hall on the 4th. It’s taken time for you to stop caring what others think of your situation, the disapproving comments, and glances from the teachers at your brother's school and almost anywhere you go. Too young, give him up to the state. Can’t take care of him, look how skinny he is, look how tired. People who look from the outside and have the luxury to judge. You are old enough to take care of him and he belongs with you. You’re the only family you two have left.

It’s only when you need help that it kills you to see Mrs. Litska. She’s an old woman who was able to babysit your brother while you are at work. With one knock, the door opens and you are met with a frown on her crinkled face. You don’t have time to say much, you just give her the envelope of this month’s pay and step inside. Your brother is asleep on the brightly foiled couch in the dim living room that smells of baked bread. The sound of Vivaldi comes through the ancient radio on the side table. His little fingers hold tightly onto the Spider-Man plushie picked out at the thrift store a while ago. It’s seen better days, but they are insuperable. Placing the stuffed item to the side, one arm loops around his shoulders to him up to place his head on your shoulder. The kid could sleep through anything.

The both of you head upstairs into your own living quarters. The lights don’t turn on when the flip is switched and you sigh as you try your best to remain close to the wall.it proves to be hard with your body ready to give out, but you ultimately make it to the room and place your brother into the squeaky bed. The candles are pulled from the drawer and each one settles into every corner of the space nicely.

Finally, you take off your partially wet clothes and put them into a pile by the tub. At least the water is warm as your body slowly leans down into it. Suddenly, the room is quiet and it’s hard to let yourself float away. It’s eerie and not comforting at all. It never is. There is no next destination besides a dreaded one, no way to work yourself towards, hanging on through the blissfully hard distractions that take up your life. They allow you to not stop, to not think about where you could be. Staying busy saves you from reaching into yourself too much.

Minutes tick by, a full half-hour before your skin is soggy and the water is cold. Still, it's better to be here than think that in another hour you could be trafficked and the little boy in the other room sleeping peacefully would have no one left. Mother dead, father gone, sister missing. It brings a chill to the room and it’s suffocating. Once you’re dressed casually, you check in on your brother who is still tucked in, his breathing mellowed out. Here’s to hoping he stays asleep and doesn’t wander through the place at three in the morning to an empty apartment. You kiss his forehead and bring his plushies within reach. They crowd the space around him, cocooning him in.

With one last safety check and blowing out the candles, you lock the door from the outside and move along the hallway down to the stairs.

Your neighborhood is wet and dark at this hour. Thankfully, you are prepared with a switchblade and pepper spray bought last week. It’s three blocks to the main streets where more people walk with umbrellas. Men in suits getting home and families hurrying to their cars. The shop lights flash, shop windows showcasing fried chicken and ice cream. Your stomach automatically grumbles.

Your umbrella holds up for the most part until the lights start to separate and the streets once again turn dim and dirty. The sudden gusts of wind fold it in and it snaps. Soda cans and bags of junk food litter the edges of cement. Shops on this side are all closed, bars and steel curtains drawn. Every little sound has the back of your neck standing up. A tabby cat pops up from under a beat-up truck and it has your heart momentarily stop. Hopefully, it’s around the corner. Your hands shakily open the worn piece of paper to try and locate the street. Luckily, it’s one street down. Once you turn the corner, you head right into a narrow alley. The pepper spray is held onto tightly with clammy hands.

The situation is starting to look sketchier as you go on. Once you reach the dead end, something to the left catches your peripheral vision. Off to the side is another narrow path, much shorter than the one you just went through. It leads directly to a steel door with a neon sign right above. The letters that read Welcome bathe the entrance in blue and red. When you come closer, you notice a little plant to the side. As if it can hide the strangeness of it all when all it does is highlight. Still, the harshness of the surroundings doesn't reach this corner. For a while, you stand there as the rain continues to patter. The sign buzzes and flickers. Your clothes get more soaked but you refuse to move forward. I’m a bad bitch, I’m a bad bitch. I got this. There is vibration coming from the floor beneath your feet. The door opens and a big muscular man gestures for you to come in. This is how it starts. A cliche buff bouncer opening the rope to the gates of hell. He stares and steps aside, gesturing again. Maybe you could have made a run for it before he appeared. Not now. It would be useless. They will come looking. These people always collect. You’ve seen it before. Ultimately, the decision has been made by someone else. There's more to lose if you don't and with a tug of your bag, you trudge forward.

What you had been imagining this past week was apparently absurd compared to the vision that lay in front of you now. There was no blood, no people begging for you to help them escape. No blindfold, just plenty of men and women holding down handles at the slot machines that showed them all the wrong symbols. You walked through the desperation into another area of green felt tables and cards being dealt. The air is stuffy and it smells of smoke and alcohol. Apparently, no one else is bothered. Ahead of you, a tall man is pressing on something in his ear with a meaty hand. Darting your eyes around, you take in more. Before confusion settles in on where to go you find the answer. From the second floor, Taehyung holds onto the railing, looking around. Your eyes meet and it’s strangely intimate. Too intimate. It must not be hard to be found when your clothes are wetting the floor beneath you.

He walks towards you with a small smile. His cobalt blue suit stands out and there’s a dangly earring hanging from one ear. His appearance is much flashier than it was the last time you saw him. With one look behind you, he leads you both up the stairs. On the way, you internally chide yourself for wearing what you are now. The wet clothes make you feel like a little sewer rat. You feel like ratatouille and the confidence that brought you here is dwindling. Instead of a shoddy warehouse that was expected, you are venturing deeper into a maze of halls with red carpeting and gold-rimmed mirrors. Eyes remain forward, but your mind tries to remember every sharp turn, every step that takes you further away from an exit. It is not hard to conjure up terrible, gruesome images and they flash a mile a second. There is only silence and you do not expect anything else. Finally, Taehyung comes to a halt and you almost bump into his back. The door is red and for some reason, it hits you know what big of a mistake you have made. You feel like you’ve been personally delivered to hell’s gates. No one knows where you went tonight. They could get rid of your body and no one would look. It would be easy. Just a poor, young person who could have been tossed or thrown into the river. Another cold case, another victim. He knocks on the door in a pattern of sound and pauses. Must be a code of some sort. Loud noises and laughter get closer until the door opens abruptly and an older gentleman with peppered gray hair greets the man next to you.

“Tae, my boy. Yoongi was about to cheat again.” Tae? Yoongi? This stranger’s excitement has you even more on edge. Your palms are now sore from clenching and cutting at them with overgrown nails. Taehyung moves forward and he smiles as an arm is put around his shoulder. There’s conversation but you don’t hear any of it. Somehow you get yourself inside the room and the door shuts right after. There’s even more smoke and laughter and a champagne bottle being popped somewhere. It all whizzes by. On the outside, your face must seem neutral but the inside is ringing with alarms and warnings. It feels like there’s a hole in the pit of your stomach. Somewhere along the way, the older gentleman named Lee went off to talk to some people on a chase couch against the wall.

There is a long gambling table at the end of this well-sized room and it seems to be the destination. When you get closer, there are about eight people around it. Mostly men with frowns. It must be the small number of chips in front of them. That doesn’t matter a second later though. Not when you catch the sight of the man sitting at the head of it. There’s a force that seems to be pulling everything in space to him, everybody. Bluish Silver hair catches the lighting of the small chandelier above as he gets up with a flute in between pale hands. His fingers grab a couple of chips from his pile which is no doubt the biggest of them all. They twirl in his ring-clad fingers. The veins line them and it’s hard to not stare. The robe that hangs off his lean figure looks decadent and expensive, so much so that it would stop the question of why he is wearing it entirely. There’s so much to take in. His face is gorgeous. His gummy smile numbs the feeling of panic that set in before. He gets closer, or perhaps you do. The two of you walk up to him. Realization dawns in then. Fuck My life.

“Mr.Min, this is miss Y/N.”

[gojoscloset]

Stand Still.

Geto Suguru x F!Reader Angst!

Synopsis: Geto allows his insecurities to take over his mind resulting in him hurting your feelings when you show a little too much interest in Gojo.

Please read the notes at the bottom uwu ❣️

Warnings: ANGST! Swearing???? DIDNT PROOF READ LOL

PT. 2

❌❌❌❌❌❌❌❌❌❌❌❌❌❌❌❌❌❌

You stood in the living room you shared with your boyfriend, the usual loving and welcoming atmosphere was no longer there. The reds and oranges you felt when you spent time with him was now replaced with emotions that felt like muggy shades of blues and grays. *

Everything felt like it was slowed down, like you had just witnessed everything in slow motion.

You looked into Geto’s eyes filled to the brim with bewilderment. Chest heaving as the remainder of adrenaline rushed through him. You couldn’t tear your gaze away from him, You've never seen him this worked up. You have never seen him this...mean.

Every last word he spat out was Accusatory. Harsh. Unfiltered. All the words came from a place of insecurity, an insecurity even he didn’t know he had.

It took you a minute to process everything that was said, well rather spat, to you. It was like your mind couldn’t fathom the fact that your sweet boyfriend stood before you in the aftermath of an emotional bomb he just dropped.

You knew this would happen at some point. You knew that relationships came with obstacles that you would have to face together. You knew that, but you were so hopeful that you would be able to talk things through like adults.

You two were always so adamant about communicating, and speaking up when something is bothering you, promising each other to put pride to the side and speak up and compromise on whatever the issue may be.

All it takes is one to fuck it up.

You finally processed what he said to you, the weight of his words crushed you into a million pieces. The heat reached your face and the stinging in your eyes was what made you finally look away.

You plopped down on the couch giving yourself a moment before you looked back up at him.

“I...” You approached with caution as you spoke, afraid he would cut you off as he has been since the argument started. Spewing Words as sharp as a knife not allowing you to get a word in edgewise and raising his voice over your calm one in order to try to get his point across, and oh did he get it across.

“You……..it’s…….Uh….” You lifted a finger up. Silently asking Geto to give you a moment to gather your words. Quickly you looked away ,your tears beginning to flow, not seeming to stop anytime soon. But still, you couldn’t talk, the lump in your throat stopping you, words only coming out in hiccups.

You cursed yourself for not being able to hold them in long enough to explain how you felt about the situation. About his accusations. Cursed yourself for not being able to speak freely, or be upset without looking like a crybaby.

Getos anger diminished the instant he saw the tears roll down your face. His knitted brows relaxed and his eyes softened at the sight of you, shaking as you tried to speak your mind. Unaware of the weight his words had.

He has seen you worked up and upset like this countless times, but never because of him. To say the guilt hit differently was an understatement.

You took a deep and shaky breath and held it for a few seconds. You were quite surprised at the fact that Geto didn’t move or say anything to interrupt you the entire time.

How long have you two been here?

“I tried so hard to avoid this, Suguru..... I looked past my insecurities….pushed the doubts to the side and all of that so you could receive my love without obstacles….without me projecting my fears onto you and the relationship.” You somehow managed to speak shakily of course, voice cracking almost the entire time.

He internally cringed at the formality, the lack of pet names made his heart wrench in pain, reminding him how bad he really messed up.

“And to know that you feel this way about me...and to know that my efforts are evidently not reciprocated...hurts like a mother fucker..”

You covered your mouth, eyes on the wall beside you, still unable to look at him.

“But honestly Geto… what hurts the most is that I already know you could do better…” you rolled your eyes upwards, dropping more tears and shook your head, your own insecurities laying themselves out on the table.

Geto’s eyes widened then immediately his expression turned to a pained one, remembering the words he spat in the heat of the moment. **

‘If I would’ve known that you would turn into Satoru’s little cheerleader, ready to kiss his ass whenever he came around, then I wouldn’t have asked you to be my girlfriend!! I could’ve and should’ve done wayyy better I swear!’

For someone who was talking so much shit five minutes ago, he found himself at a loss for words.

There was a lump in his throat , and when did his mouth turn dry?

Was it when he recalled the things he said after that? Mentions of how many opportunities he had in the duration of your relationship in order to hit you where it hurt most?

Or was it when he mentioned that ‘Gojo wouldn’t date you anyway’ in attempts to mask the underlying jealousy he had at the very thought of you falling for the man who could quite literally do anything.

Who could have everything.

Who had the world crafted specifically for him.

“and I always wondered…” he snapped out of his thoughts and his brows furrowed once again, creating a displeased look. He was disgusted with himself, disgusted that he selfishly ran his mouth without considering your feelings.

“Like….what I could have possibly done to have been chosen by you? Geto Suguru….chose me? Of all people.” You wiped tears away from your face, you looked so small doing so, Geto wished he was the one wiping those tears, but he couldn’t move. His feet betraying his commands. Knees weak knowing he did this to you.

“And for you to even think that I would betray you and break your trust.” It was your turn to speak now, holding in so much up until this point, however you did not raise your voice, nor did you cause a scene. You loved him way too much for that.

“Geto Suguru, a man the gods have blessed not just with looks but with a heart of gold..dating me? And you think I would throw all of that away to be with your best friend?” You choked on a couple of sobs, continuously wiping your tears away, seriously wondering if you have ever cried this hard in your life.

The fact that you still somehow managed to praise him while scolding him made his blood run cold. Guilt through the roof, enough to make his fingers cold and shake slightly by his sides. A stark contrast compared to his words.

‘What have I done?’

It was no surprise to him that you were still somehow being kind despite your anger. You were kind, not nice. ***

The love was there and he knew it, he felt it. Because if it were anybody else the results would’ve been different.

“I’m...sorry if I make you feel that way...but please know it was not in my intentions to hurt you ..” You finally looked at him while apologizing, you made sure he knew you were being as genuine as possible.

You pushed yourself up from the couch and made your way to the bedroom. Geto’s eyes followed you, but still he couldn’t not move.

‘Move you fucking idiot!’

A Switch in his brain went off as soon as you were out of his sight. He sped walked in your direction, but he was a little too late. You locked the door behind you just before he was able to put himself in between the door.

“Y/n! Please let me in! I’m sorry!” The knob shook as he tried the door. He knew it would be locked but he’d be damned to let you go through this alone. He already did enough damage, he was determined to at least try and fix this.

The knob shook harder and soon the whole door shook. He slammed his hands against the wood and called out your name desperately begging you to let him in.

You ignored the cries to the best of your abilities, stepping away from the door. The sounds of his voice begging for you made you want to throw up, it hurt so much.

“Y/n please...I just want to talk..” his voice cracked and you began to sob quietly just at the mere sound. You wanted to open the door, you really really did, but at the same time you didn’t want to see him.

He was adamant though. He could hear you try to muffle the sobs on the other side and that’s what put him into overdrive.

“Move away from the door!” He commanded, kicking it down easily, startling you in the process. Thankfully he gave you time to step away before doing so, and his heart broke again at the sight of you.

Your eyes were dull but still streaming tears, but the duffle bag slung over your shoulder full of your items made him feel so powerless.

“Hey hey hey……what are you doing..” his eyes desperately scanned your figure, moving from the bag to your eyes then to the room, noticing drawers were left open and things tossed around the bed.

“...W-Where are you going…?” His voice was small but he stood his ground in the doorway, blocking the exit unintentionally but intentionally.

You didn’t look at him, but more so past him. Your eyes were on him but they weren’t on him.

“I’m going home for a little bit, until I’m-“

“What do you mean? Home..is here..”he cut you off. Again his voice was small, not matching with his towering form that slowly began to deflate when he noticed how the love in your eyes was nowhere to be found.

You sighed and placed a hand on your temple. He cut you off again, and you didn’t want to do this anymore. You didn’t want to fight him anymore.

“Suguru. You know what I mean. I’m going to my paren-“

“No!” He yelled, causing you to flinch. “You’re not leaving me!” Geto snatched the bag from your grasp and unzipped the bag, he made his way into the room and dumped the contents into an already opened drawer, a majority of the clothes and items dropping to the floor but he didn’t care. He wasn’t going to lose you.

His breathing was heavy again, and tears threatened to drop. Oh how you wished you hadn’t seen the way his eyes looked at you.

“Suguru...please…” you cautiously approached the bag he flung on the bed, and repacked the bag slowly, afraid of him snapping again.

“Can we Please just talk about this?” He forcefully grabbed you by the forearms, pulling you away from the duffle bag and pushed you up against a wall, not in a harsh way, but in a way that felt desperate.

“Please let me explain myself, I didn’t mean anything I said I-“ he tried spilling out what he had to say before you tried pushing him away, but now it was his turn to be interrupted.

“I know, Suguru…I know..but before we talk about this...I really need to clear my head..Otherwise I won’t be able to do things in a rational way...and you know I can’t do that if I have you around to influence my thoughts.”

Your eyes searched for his and you regretted it, you were feeling so many things but your eyes held no emotion. However, seeing the way he looked down at you, hair messy and in his face from going awol earlier, his face flushed from the raw display of emotion brought life back into your eyes.

Tears dropped on your cheeks when you looked up at him. That was enough to get the waterworks going again.

He never realized how afraid he was of losing you until now. It never occurred to him that this would even be something to happen in your relationship until this very moment.

He realized how much he fucked up, allowing his emotions to have snowballed into this big ass mess. You were always so open to talk about things, but he never took the opportunity because of his pride, and now the consequences of his actions are coming to bite him in the ass.

“I gotta go..” you whispered and easily got out of his grasp, he didn’t fight back, he knew he couldn’t change your mind once you had your mind set on doing something. Another reason he fell in love with you , another wave of regret.

He watched your form as you left, eyes never leaving your body.

You didn't look back and that was a sight that would haunt him in his dreams forever.

—————

**** notes:

* - in the paragraph where it talks about feeling colors

When I think of memories and how I felt, I associate them with colors, reds oranges, pinks, yellows green = warm/ happier memories

Shades of blue = cold, more depressive moments

So when it talks about y/n feeling the blue, gray atmosphere, it’s because the tension was so thick, the usual ‘red’ atmosphere was now ‘blue’ at the flip of a switch.

Lol super self indulgent

**- this fic is so self indulgent, I do this. Well used to, but when I used to get mad and things would get heated I won’t remember what I said or what I did because I was so upset.

***- to me, Being nice is superficial and being Kind comes from within.

——-

Hello! Welcome to my new blog!

I was GOJOSGLASSES

But something happened to my account and I think I’m being shadowed and I’m sooo sad cause I had a whole theme and master list (a short one but still) now I have to start over )^:

Anywho! Welcome! Requests are open and hopefully I’ll get around to moving the fics here or maybe just linking old ones but I think I may transfer them over here )^: big sad!

—————

Hello babies! Thank you for taking the time to read this!

This fic is super super self indulgent

I love Angst so much. I don’t know why LOL

Of course this is an Angst to fluff type stuff and I’ll get to part 2. When I feel like it

(Or if it’s highly requested) but I just felt like being extra dramatic.

Also LOLOLOL I love angst but please don’t leave your partner in the dark like this, communicate please. I’m just being extra dramatic because I love hurting myself with fics.

BAHAHA Also this Drabble thing was inspired by the song:

Stand Still - Sabrina Claudio

Very angsty and I feel like I’ll make more drabbles and stuff based off this song because I love love love it so much omg very sensual very sexy!

Thanks for reading!

[bts-teaspoonff]

Fangirl pt. 1

Genre: Romance, Slow Burn, Idol A/U

Pairing: BTS OT7 x reader

Rating: PG

Summary: Y/N, being a huge fangirl, finally got her chance to work alongside her favorite idol group as a backup dancer. She gets to know each member personally and realizes that her feelings may be more than fangirl-idol attraction.

Word Count: 3K

PARTS: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | .... masterlist

“It’s finally here!” I shouted as I bolted from my room towards the front door to greet the delivery man carrying my package. Even without looking at the mirror, I could feel my smile going up to my ears and my heartbeat furiously echoing through my chest. The delivery man handed me a medium sized box and stared at me as I reach out for the box with a huge smile plastered on my face. I signed the delivery form, closed the door and ran back inside my unit.

I ran to the living room and placed the box on the floor. I turned to my left and hurriedly rummaged for my cutter inside the drawer beside the sofa. I also took my phone on top of the said drawer and placed it on my lap. I swiftly sat down on the floor in front of my package with the cutter ready in my hand when I remembered something. I unlocked my phone and proceeded to video call my brother who’s at work. My brother’s name and his photo appeared on the screen as I wait for him to answer the call.

“Hey Y/N…” His face popped up on my screen. I silently giggled at the angle of his front camera when he answered the call. Not really flattering despite him being good looking. He must have placed the phone on a table directly below his face. “You know I’m at work right? Why did you call? Emergency?” I could hear keyboard sounds in the background. He must be busy typing on the computer as he didn’t bat an eye on his phone while talking to me.

“Yeah I know. I just wanted to share some good news” My camera is facing towards me with just my eyes peeking through screen. I was worried that maybe he’s with some people at work that might see me when he answers the video call and I’m not decent looking right now. “My package has arrived!” I low-key squealed as I pressed the ‘rotate camera’ button on the screen and directed the camera at the package. I could see my brother looking now at the phone. He placed his phone in front of him and leaned it on a stable surface for him to see me properly. He continued to type slowly on his keyboard as he steal glances on his phone screen.

“Don’t tell me…. You bought another merch?” He giggled as he looked at his phone screen and continued to type on his keyboard. He looked back at his computer screen after a second, with a smile on his face. I opened the package with my cutter on one hand and my phone on the other. Tearing through the tape, I can’t contain my excitement as i shrieked when my cutter got through the end of the tape. I released the cutter from my hand and pushed it aside.

“BTS Merch! Oh my god, I have been waiting for these for weeks. I got the latest album, more Tiny Tan figurines, and some concert goods from last tour.” I proceeded to open the box and showed my brother the contents. I felt accomplishment as I look at all the merchandise that has just arrived at home. My ARMY heart couldn’t contain the joy that I have right now. I shot my eyes back on the phone screen and saw my brother smiling as he looked at me through the phone screen.

“Hey, I’m happy you are happy but you know I work in Big Hit right? I work for them?” He stopped typing, took the phone back in his hands and brought the phone close to his face. “I could just easily buy these things for you with my employee discount.” And now his whole face is occupying my phone screen. 

“Jiyong, I know but where’s the fun in that? I want to buy these items using my own money. Well, an employee discount is nice but I don’t want to abuse your privilege as I buy too much of their merchandise.” I snorted at the fact that I really do buy too much of their merchandise. Besides, when I use his employee discount, the items are delivered directly to him as he works inside the Big Hit Building. With the amount of merchandise that I buy, I don’t want to embarrass him and label him as a big fanboy especially with him working so close to the boys.

“If you weren’t my twin sister, I would totally laugh at you. Not that I think you’re crazy but you’re…. loyal” He puts emphasis on the last word. He respects my deep profound respect for the 7 boys but he thinks that maybe I have gone too far with the purchases. He placed his phone back in front of him, leaning on a surface. “Oh before I forget, did you read my email?” I was taken aback with topic change but I’m used to it as he does this all the time. I pressed the ‘rotate camera’ button once again for him to see my face. 

“No, I haven’t opened my email yet. I went home so late last night. My last client in the gym arrived late so we finished late as well. A bummer.” I scoffed as I remembered the fatigue that enveloped my body yesterday. I work as a gym trainer/physical therapist full time and a dance teacher/choreographer as my sideline. I work at my friend’s gym located in the heart of Seoul as a gym trainer. I currently handle 7 clients, some who I have worked with for a few years already. I also teach dance classes at a small dance studio just a few blocks from where I live. Mainly, I handle BTS dance classes because duh, I am a full-blooded ARMY. I really tried to make my passion as a source of income and it warms my heart to see people having fun when I teach them those dances.

“Check it. Anyways, I gotta go. I still have a lot to do. As you know, the company is busy since BTS will be releasing another album sometime this year.” My brother currently works as a Recording Engineer in Big Hit. He used to brag to me that he’ll spend hours with BTS and TXT. I was jealous of course but I am so proud he’s working for them. Whenever I listen to songs from Big Hit artists, I try to think that he has contributed to a lot of songs despite not knowing what exact songs he has worked on. Another reason why I listen and support them.

We both said our farewells and dropped the call. As I took out all the contents of the package unto the floor, I used my phone on the other hand. I opened my mail and saw few unread emails. Some of them were from my subscriptions on Netflix and Spotify, which I barely read. On top of the list was my brother’s mail. I saw the subject “READ THIS FANGIRL!” and I laughed. Here I thought he sent me something urgent or important that needs my utmost attention. Must be another event or merchandise that they’ve yet to announce to the public.

I opened the mail and my eyes were glued to the first line of the message body.

“Big Hit is hiring backup dancers. See the forwarded email below, sis. I think they’re meaning to assign whoever they’ll hire as part of BTS dance team.” Did I just receive this email? It came from my brother so it must be true. He won’t prank me like that. If I apply, there’s no guarantee that I’ll be hired right? That’s too bad if I won’t be hired but there’s nothing to lose if I try to apply.

I left my package scattered throughout my floor and ran towards my laptop lying on my bed. I sat down on the floor beside my bed and opened my laptop. I felt like a kid but here I am, rushing to find my resume to apply for a new job that might eventually change my life.

….

It’s been a week since I applied as a backup dancer for Big Hit. I sent in my resume and a few videos of me dancing to some of their artists’ songs. I’m lucky to have known a lot of BTS’ songs and choreographies by heart and I might have tried to study some of their label mates’ songs as well. I haven’t received a reply back from them and I’m worried that I may not receive any response ever.

Apparently, BTS is known for having only male backup dancers as far as I know so it’s news to me that they’re hiring female backup dancers now. It got me thinking that this might also attract fellow fangirls like me to apply but knowing Big Hit, they wouldn’t want anything scandalous to happen just because they hired female backup dancers. I’m not saying that female dancers lack professionalism but how the boys are the top rank boy group in the country, female fans would be green with jealousy if they see female dancers dancing with them. Some Armies are really protective when it comes to the boys so it’s really shocking to hear that the company is finally considering this.

The day that I got the mail from my brother, I spent half of my day planning what dances to shoot and submit. I chose BTS’ Idol and Singularity, TXT’s Crown and a freestyle dance to Beyonce’s Yonce. I wanted to showcase my range in dancing by carefully choosing a variety of songs. I admit that the reason I may have applied to this job is partly because I’m a fangirl but nonetheless, my passion for dancing is bigger. I have been dancing since I was a kid but I was not this confident at the start. It’s hard to convince me to perform in front of a bigger audience, let alone a stadium full of fans. I slowly got over my fear little by little when I started teaching dance classes at the dance studio. The fear is still there and you may wonder why I am applying for this job when I’m scared shit in performing for a large audience. BTS taught me to love myself and I am really trying my best to go out of my comfort zone. I figured that this may be my best chance in doing so. Also, I get the benefit of working alongside them which is a big plus.

I couldn’t really focus on my job for the whole week. I find myself regularly checking my mail in the hopes of getting a response from Big Hit. 5 days and there’s still no mail. Maybe my email just went to their spam folder or maybe I typed in the wrong mail. On the 7th day while I was pulling out my clothes in the dryer, I heard a ping from my phone from across the hall. I left my phone on my bed and the laundry room is right beside my room. I noticed that the ping was my assigned tone for mails. I hurriedly took out all my warm dry clothes and unto the basket, closed the door of the dryer and turned the lights off in the laundry room.

“New Mail. Subject: Dance Team Application” I saw the notification banner and my heart just jumped out of my chest. I felt my forehead sweating profusely, fingers shaking and my throat closing up as I try to open my phone and check my mail. I silently and swiftly read the contents of the mail. After two seconds, I shrieked at the top of my lungs and threw my phone across my bed. I ran out of my room and in circles around the living room. Good thing I live alone so that I could just celebrate and make loud noises like this. I jumped up and down on the sofa while etching the image of the mail into my head. I buried my head on my pillows and shouted once more, emptying all the air out of my lungs.

I ran back into my room and read the mail again.

“Good day, Miss Y/N.

We have received your application and we are glad to say that we are impressed with your resume and skillset. We would like you to come in our office tomorrow so we can meet and talk personally with our dance team. We are glad to have you join our current dance team. Details of our meeting are expressed below.

Time: 10 am

Address: 42 Teheran-ro 108-gil, Daechi-dong, Gangnam-gu, Seoul, South Korea

Attire: Comfortable Casual

Please look for Mina at the front desk to escort you. Thank you.”

I still can’t believe what I’m seeing. Did I just got accepted? As a backup dancer? For Big Hit? Maybe for BTS? I’m such a lucky fangirl. I can’t wait for tomorrow.

….

It’s a good thing that my schedule is free today. I don’t have any clients in the gym scheduled for today and the dance studio is closed for today. I was so nervous and excited at the same time. I woke up at 6 am as I feel my jitters bothering my sleep. I tried to go back to sleep but I trashed the bed and rolled side to side for about 30 mins so I decided to go for a run. I turned on my Spotify and played my ‘Intense Run Playlist’ which mostly consists of high bpm BTS songs. There’s a jogging path near where I live and the scenery is filled with trees. Very calming, which I really need right now.

I arrived in front of the Big Hit Building around 8:30 am. I made sure to arrive early as I don’t want to be late for the meeting. I’m so anxious right now if I’m allowed to go up as early as 9 am or should I just arrived on time. I lingered outside and paced back and forth at a nearby shade. I wondered if I could visit my brother and stay with him for the mean time.

“Is she a stalker?” I heard whispers coming from my right as I slumped back at the pole where I’m taking shade just across the building. “That’s scary.” Three schoolgirls were standing a few meters away from me. They were staring and smirking at me. I wondered why they would think of me as such then I realized that I wore my hoodie up to cover half of my face.

“I’m not…”

“Good luck stalker-nim. You won’t get a glimpse of the boys.” They giggled and ogled me with judgmental looks with their arms across the chests. “Can you get away from the boys? We don’t want stalker armies like you.”

“As I said, I’m not a stalker and I’m older than you. Why are you talking to me in an informal tone?” I pull my hoodie off my head and slowly tread towards them. They laughed and ran away at the sight of me making my way to them. Sheesh, do I really look like a stalker?

I looked at my watch and it’s still 9:10 am. I guess I could try and visit my brother. The fresh morning air blew gently in my face, as if to welcome me, and be my merry playmate, and the sun looked at me with a warm and tender smile. What a nice start to my day, I thought. I put up my hoodie again and I was comfortable once more with the warmth my mere hoodie gave me.

“I have a meeting in your building today. Do you want to meet up? I’m not due until 10 am. – your adorable look alike” I texted my brother and inserted my phone back in my pocket. I breathed in the fresh breeze and not a second later, my phone pinged. I pulled out my phone to see my brother’s name on the screen.

“Lucky, I’m on a coffee break. I’ll be down in a sec.” he replied. A grin was present on my face as I stood up from where I was leaning. I skipped from across the street towards the building. I looked above at the sky and towards the top of the Big Hit Building and when I returned my gaze back in front of me, I was met by a dark haired man in his mid-twenties. I bumped into him and was knocked down at the side of the street. I exclaimed in pain as I rub my backside.

“Hey look where you’re go…” I looked up and immediately recognized the face. The man was wearing a grey Fear of God shirt paired with black baggy pants. His face was half covered by a black mask and his hair was kept away from his face with a black headband almost occupying his whole forehead.

“You should be the one watching you’re going. Crossing the street while prancing around like that.” He scoffed and continued to make his way towards the building. He didn’t even help me up. I sneered back.

“I’m sorry. I assure you that he’s not usually like this. He’s in a bad mood.” Two hands were suddenly around my elbows, propping me up from the ground. I turned my head and saw a woman around mid-twenties as well. She was carrying an opened big black bag propped on her right shoulder with filled with piles of unruly papers stuck inside. When I finally was able to stand up properly, she took off her hands from me and bowed in apology. She swiftly followed the man and shouted, “Yoongi, wait. I can explain.”

So I was right. It was Suga. All the images of a funny and loving Min Yoongi ran through my mind. Just like a scary movie, it was replaced by a disgusted look he shot at me a while ago. Did he…. Maybe he thought I was a stalker or something? I guess if I really looked like one then I don’t blame him for shooting those looks at me. However, a decent person would help anyone up in that situation.

I beat the dust off my hoodie and slowly treaded towards the building’s entrance. Not a really good way to start my first interaction with anyone from BTS, I thought.

Next part: 2