#theres more to this photo if you look closely btw

[dusty-pistol]

Sorry for the plain background. Didn't know what else to do for it, lol

[hanjisunglover]

heya! may i be ⭐🍰 anon if its not taken? (ik my user is exposed bc im gonna show a photo but ill still be an anon) thanks☺. but i have a thought to bring to the table anddd its abt jisung so you may love it or like it! but enough rabbling, let me tell you the thought.

imagine if jisung looked like this everytime you give him head. like it'll be a calm Saturday afternoon and jisung just came from being at the dorms for the week. you were in the room with Bbama laying on your chest while you play your animal chef game on your phone. jisung comes in says hi and gives hugs and kisses then gets in the shower. after his shower he puts on a sweater like black shirt on and basketball shorts. then you asked him how was practice and his day went. he told you about it and talked about him being stressed a bit and how he needed some type of relief (*wink wink*). so you put Bbame down in his bed in the living room then come back to the room and started putting up your hair. jisung is a bit confused then he realizes,your about to give him head.he watches you sink to your knees on his side of the bed then look at him "ji,if you dont mind taking your shorts off for me?" you said in your always soft voice and he immediately started taking off his shorts. you see hes left in his black briefs,then you started softly kissing the bulge in them. jisung let out a sigh as he watches you with his plump bottom lip his in mouth. after your teasing, you pull down his briefs and his 7 inches springed out and softly slapped his belly button, it was a bit girthy but the stretch felt so good when he'll enter you. his pink red-ish tips' precum oozing out, it looked delicious and your mouth started to water. the shaft slightly curving up a bit. jisung looks at you waiting eagerly for you to take him in his mouth...

(im gonna leave this here and let you do your amazing magic and make this piece of trash wayyy better. and sorry if theres mistakes and sorry again for the basically huge paragraph or more. and btw, DO NOT feel pressure to write this! totally fine with me if you just react to it and not write ;) buttt ill see if you write it or not~ bye bye! ��)

hello ⭐🍰 anon, sooo nice to have you here! AND OMG YOU DON'T GET IT HOW MUCH I THINK ABOUT THAT VLOG. your writing skills >>>, also it's pretty short but yeah

warnings: switch reader, switch hanji, oral receiving (m), praise kink, cum eating.

Your eyes are locked in his, he's looking at you so impatiently that it's driving you crazy and still need even to taste his pre-cum. "Angel please, do- do something."

Your hands travel on his thighs, as your breath hits the sensitive head of his cock, Jisung grab lightly your hair driving your mouth to him, "show some respect baby," you make fun of him — just to see his expression getting darker, his grip gets stronger.

"Give me that mouth y/n," he hisses lightly, your tongue take the way from the base of his cock towards the tip, sucking as soft as you can, his head move back as his other hand grab the sheets under him. Your lips open enough to take half of his shaft in your mouth, the moans that he's letting out are the best sound that you could ever ask. His grab on your hair get tighter when you start to move your head up and down.

"God, do not stop.." His voice gets high pitch with a whimper, you're sucking his dick so well that his toes curls for the pleasure, he feels that he's gonna explode in your throat. Your eyes start to tear up for the deep throating that your beautiful boyfriend is receiving, the saliva run down to your chin making his view blurry for pleasure. He cum in your mouth, making you moan around his shaft cause the taste it's amazing and you just can't contain yourself from swallowing every drop of it.

Jisung moan even louder as his muscles tense up for the pleasure, your eyes are closing letting the tears for the intense moment that he just felt, his hands stroke your cheeks softly as your head move slightly up from his cock. "you're.. perfect."

[meimostar]

Hiya there! Hopefully tumblr doesn't eat this ask😭

So technically; Lovesick

Y/N Cookie reunites with their long-distanced childhood friend, hangs out with them more, and then it makes the other cookies they've known jealous of the amount of attention received

cookies of your choice btw :3

Your request has been passed through the fog.

Cookie writing to day is 'Knight Cookie'

Far ago, you met a cookie at your age in your humble village before anything could happen. He was courageous and kind to other even if it's slightly selfless in its own right, he have good intentions as a child would have but you couldn't help the thought theres more with how close you two gotten in a short amount of time with the cookie. Whenever you're down, he would be the first to contact you and cheer you from the feeling of sadness, when theres something off. He would be the one who notice it immediately. It felt like two children being so close and the concept of 'love' was something foreign to you and them.

It was a sweet little childhood and a distant memory you would recall everytime a bad day would occur, wishing that cookie came back and continue living beside you. Its wishfull thinking, but you couldn't help but get reminded of the cookie everytime. He was there when you're down at you're lowest, when the dragon took both of your homes in the sea of fire and seizes to exiet from earth realm. You lost some friends, some family but he also lost them. You've found comfort in the cookie and sympahtize, you wished you could turn back time for a moment and met them again.

" i'm.. going to be a knight, to Holyberry castle." Those words of departure, it was a shocking revalation. " I'll defeat the red dragon, i promise." You don't care about the creature that destroyed you're home, you just hoped he is in good health. " please.. don't cry, i'll come back. I promise." A promise yet he didn't came, you wait everyday at the village gates if he came back. Always everytime with a gift that you could hope he would come.

Waiting...

Waiting...

Waiting...

Its been how many years? He departed when you two were pre-teens. Young enough to be a disciple of the knights, you pray every night that wherever he goes that he is safe from any upcoming danger.. he should've been married now, with a wife or husband and a dog. You've talked to him if he plans to get married some day if their gotten older, he always response the same.

'I want to marry you.'

A cute one, the way he immediately says it with no hesitance and the way he brightened up at your chuckle. You wonder if he even remember it, you look at the photo beside your bed ontop of a drawer.

It's a photo of you and knight. Smiling, it was an old photo albeit abit burnt but it still usable. You wonder if he remembers you. You look at the poster you have on your hand, a poster of a parade for princess cookie happening on Holyberry kingdom. A march across the kingdom to show victory of a recent knight recruits.

You've been catching up with some news of the Holyberry kingdom for some time, it was pricey since the village you're living in isn't too well off but it does the job. Your planning to come to the parade, perhaps knight is in there too?.

You sighed with an unknown expression on your face, putting the poster aside as you fall asleep on your bed. Tomorrow would be a busy day for you.

.

.

.

Today, you woke up earlier than you usually do. Brushing your teeth, took a quick shower and looking your best. You glance at the poster ontop of your drawer as you remind yourself that it's for him. You want to see him after all these years of seperation, perhaps you still have a chance?.. its only a wishful possibility as you look at yourself in the mirror before taking off to the Holyberry kingdom.

As expected of the rich fruity kingdom filled with merchants and nobles trading their supply for something even more better. Ladies and gentleman chatting and bickering before the bell chimes on signalling that the parade about to start. You overheard some of the ladies talking about the knight and a princess being best friends or even more than friends. It tugs at your heart as you try to digest the implications of the words that they said.

You walk aimlessly at the crowd before another chime rolls around, signalling the parade is beginning. The large castle doors swung open slowly as carriages and knights lined, walking as well as marching bands with trumpets, drums and plenty of entertainment lined. You can hear the music, confetti falling and the excitement of people shouting with joy.

One perticular carriage caught your eye, it embedded a sigil, specifically. The Royal Sigil, you kept your eye on it as you squish yourself through the crowd to the front as you saw him. Knight with the princess as tears swell up in your eyes, smiling as you finally saw how grown he has been. He seemed more mature now, not cute like the past childhood you have.

You waved at him, hoping he would see as you two caught eye contact. The world felt slow down as the only thing you could focus on is knight.

"... [Name]?"

-----------------------------

Thank you for reading, there will be a part 2 for knights P.O.V and the ending.

[denzartriste]

Vague My Little Pony bedrock bros au/ideas fuck this is unhinged behaviour, i drew good art to accompany it as i explain the mental illness (tw for major character death)

Going off the assumption that either anyone reading this doesnt know about mlp plot-wise or just doesnt know that much about it plot-wise. So im gonna say the few things that is kinda important to this au, if you know what the things are skip it its a lot of words:

Changling - Hivemind Bug like creatures that are kinda pony shaped. They can do magic(they have a horn), fly (they have wings), shapeshift, and their main thing is eating love. <- eating love is a legit need for them, like food - without eating love they will starve (this episode shows that, starting at around 7 minutes (theres also a banger song at around 17 minutes, but thats my bias talking)) The way they eat love is by shapeshifting (into someones thats loved) and then feeding off that love. They can also shapeshift into just a random pony that doesnt exist. Also this is what a changling looks like, btw. Easier to show than explain v

And the hivemind part is a bit iffy? I mean they say its a hivemind but in the episode i linked the changling (forgot their name because im a fake fan :( ) wanted a friend the second they were hatched so who knows. This isnt that serious this is me making bedrock bros angst from mlp world

Anyways! In my au/idea-for-angst, changlings feeding off of a person's love can harm the person they're feeding off of. I don't know if its like that in canon, which is why i'm saying its an au thing

Tantabus - In canon it's only in Princess Luna's dreams, but canon is dead i shot it, so thats not important. But the reason it exists is Luna felt guilty and made it so that it would give her nightmares (oversimplification, but it's fine) Photo example of what it looks like v

Pony - There are four types of Ponies. Earth pony (no wings + no horn), Pegasi (Have wings but dont have horn), Unicorn (no wings but have horn), Alicorn (Royalty. Have wings + have horn). Ponies also have cutie marks, which is just basicly a magic tattoo they get when they discover their talent/passion

Jeez wow that was way to many words already

Time for more words. I have two versions of this au/idea, but im gonna start with the one i drew things for.

Tommy is a changling (his wings are too damaged to fly with) and Techno is an earth pony. Tommy is a pretty young changling who Does Not like being a changling. He wants to be a pony, but at the same time he wants people to love him for being him. it's contridictory.

He doesn't take form of anyone specific, the first thing he sees are two disks resting on a bench and he decides that can be his cutie mark. He's never heard music, but he thinks he wants to.

He meets Techno, a potato farmer with apples coated in gold and Tommy didn't know that was possible, and turns out it's just a decoration and he did try to eat it but does it really matter if Techno gave him some love for it?

Techno keeps loving him, and maybe he realized something was wrong when standing for hours started to feel draining when it never had before. Maybe he realized something was off when Tommy's main was growing wrong - jutted out, the hair stiff - and maybe he shouldve realized when Tommy barely hid a gag when he ate anything techno gave him.

It takes time. Techno has a job, but he can't do it anymore. He's tired - it doesnt seem physical until he needs to close his eyes for longer. It doesnt seem like a big deal until silent acts of love towards Tommy make him need to take a nap.

It doesnt seem like a big deal to Tommy, until he realizes that this is why it's so hard to feed a big group. This is why he was allowed to leave alone, because the town is too small and they thought he was smart enough to feed off not just one person.

It doesn't seem like a big deal to Tommy until it's been months, he is full, and Techno stops opening his eyes.

It doesnt seem like a big deal until Techno's last muttered words are that he knew, and he should have done something diffrent, but-

Techno, who's cutie mark is a sword going into his skin - Techno, who's real and true and is able to love. Techno, who may as well have been born for this and who regrets this.

Techno, who stops, either because he physically cant say more or because he mentally cant. Soon enough, his chest stops rising.

Techno didnt like flowers that much, but he didnt mind them and liked the smell of the golden ones outside of his home. He wore it in his main. And tommy, a changling without much of a main or tail, wraps himself in golden flowers and sits close to Techno. There's no use pretending anymore, but he still does.

Tommy makes a Tantabus for himself, he closes his eyes not unlike Techno, and he lays down.

And he dreams.

And the flowers around him wilt.

And he can't hear anything from the hivemind - he hasnt been able to for a while now. He doesnt know how that happened, why it happened, or if it was always like that.

[leeminholinoing]

Love your brutal honesty

Damn I agree with you

1. I don't think it's unpopular but their promos that they aim at fans will flop if larries aren't here to decode that stuff they will have to change their strategy and I do hope they do that, sooner the better, make the promos less of treasure hunt and more here's the date and time goodluck

2. I think louis has lost touch with the fandom, solos, larries, neutrals alike and the way he says he lurks here and knows the fandom ins and outs he doesn't know shit, it's very hard to work with the fandom as together and if he wanted he could easily give something to work together rather than tearing it apart, they could do that so easily too, the more he says that he knows what goes in the fandom the more I think it's unlikely, he's just a bystander through grapevine either that or he truly knows and took part in the decisions of continuing to feed the rivalry and divide I mean he is british they divided and ruled the world what's new (this is a joke that isn't a joke)

3. I discussed this with a close friend of mine , louis' fans are loyal, dedicated, and passionate but it works as a sword, double edged, if you flip it they are as passionate as to turn on louis, the sooner he chooses one side of the fandom the better for everyone and I think he has already chosen the neutral and antis, and his last promo wasn't like Harry's find the house, it was look at my photos, it was aimed and designed more for solo louies and it almost flopped

4. So many larries have left the fandom, or are on the verge of leaving, are inactive and with more denials the remaining will leave too, the new surge knows nothing, like how to work with the artist's promo, Louis is rebranding his fandom and the larries will be sidelined it's better for them, but without them the fandom will be a lot like Harry's current one, casual, no rhym no rhythm just a wave and waves rise and disappear aren't steady

Also loyalty isn't rewarded with humiliation and rejection so theres that but whatever

!!!!!!

"Also loyalty isn't rewarded with humiliation and rejection so theres that but whatever"

I think it might be popular. I think people are also tired of the clues that lead to nothing (hum *369* hum). next promo cycle they won't be able to count on larries they'll only have fans who always told us "it's not that deep" (remember the home thing for harry's house? lol)

I agree I don't think he knows what goes on in his fandom or he would have stopped licking the boot of mediocre white men by now

Look at me becoming Louis and harry's biggest hater so I agree. I don't spend time on them anymore but I'm cheering from the sideline for them to flop hard and fast

yes, Louies are starting to be like harries which is so sad cause they used to have some brains. I think they'll just keep saying larries should leave the fandom and then when promo doesn't go well they'll cry saying it's larries' fault.... they are already doing this btw

[chairhahaha]

ok im gonna read this rq and say what i have to say🙂🤙

4 pointed stars were intentional!!!!（＾∇＾）all i knew is that they meant truth because es wants the truth about everyone blah blah blah but the fact that they’re black makes it opposite something to do with them wanting to be close with prisoners but at the same time can’t trust them as they’re murderers

XII!!!!!! ROMAN NUMERALS!!!!!!!!!!! okay if u saw my tag i was meant to only put XI as es is seen as number 11 but i forgot to and did XII. but if u count Jackalope as 12 that makes more sense^_^ i enjoyed the pins a lot and i love how u interpreted that as jackalope’s full control over es

Yes that is a jackalope plush i hate drawing hiim DROWN JACKALOPE🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

im not even finsihed reading the outfit part and i GASPED at the gender identity part that was so fucking smart what the freak. i was meant to draw both the female and male uniforms because confusion gender but i wasnt bothered to😭 i hate drawing perspectives but i love the detail in saki’s card that bc shes seen as weaker people look down on her Ok Right this is abt Es

interrogation papers!!!!!!!! theres also meant to be a stack but i also wasn’t bothered so i glued that shi together

if u also look really closely (its unnoticeable. its nearby es’ feet btw) the warden shirt is there idk what thats meant to mean but i guess bc its so hidden then

glue symbolism when glued paper gets symbolised no matter what they do they’ll always be imperfect ahahahahahahhahahahah

the sash translation is actually stupid its just saying “HOW THE HELL DO YOU DO THIS” <- omg reference to how hard their job is (what the hell. i just wanted to show how much i suffered doing this and i still made it an es reference what is wrong with me)

someone get es monthly therapy wait nvm not even the therapist cld understand them cause ik damn well i’d be so confused if an amnesiac 15 yr old is telling me about music prisons

THE FAMILY PHOTO!!!!! please dont ask about the designs i was about to rip my hair off if i didnt finish this anyways i was supposed to blur the parents but either way they’re still so obscured meaning that es doesn’t know shit about them🤣👎👎

flower❤️

right idk what kind of flower that was i tried searching up random flowers and gave up half way but i feel like i was going for a gerbera . IS THAT A LUTF REFERENC

Anywaysi was trying to go for the fact that there’s only 1 flower means that they’re technically. alone.AHAHAHAHAA yeah what love? cause as far as ik not even their “caretaker” (jackalope) cares abt them. dawg ur kid was getting beaten to near death and u didn’t do anything (maybe bc kotoko was there but) hey ur child’s been having consistent panic attacks why did u only appear in muu’s first vd

right let me get back on topic since they’re alone! in the shade! with absolutely no love being given at all! because their way of love is so warped that! even if most prisoners r actually concerned for es! es won’t let themselves get attached!! so they don’t get any love! because they won’t accept it!

i feel like i completely yapped while writing that. love ur analysises whatever the word’s called.AND THANK YOU MOOT,😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭ILOVE YOUR INTERPRETATIONS AND ART. UR SO AMAZING

No Seek, No Find

NEVER AGAIN😭😭😭😭😭😭 yk i might edit this post and fix a lot of issues uh

[colourful-void]

my meta psychological horror game concept because my father was not impressed by it.

meta games like undertale that mess with ur playthroughs r great, and ddlc does that And has cool stuff in the files and OneShot is the king of messing with playthroughs and files and meta on your computer! its really amazing how meta these video games can get.

but here are some things i wanna see in a point and click style viddy game like that that aims to be as under your skin disturbingly real as possible. this is my euthanasia coaster, my theoretical psychological horror game.

again this is a theoretical game, this does not exist in any capacity, and i currently have no plans to bring it into reality.

- OC it's gonna detect ur playthroughs via hidden files, and detect if a file was there and then deleted - its gonna detect what version of the game ur playing on (if there's like,, windows ver vs mac ver etc) and then make fun of you for it. if you get one ver of the game and then use another the game knows and it taunts you - self crashes for days ur gonna get so tired of rebooting this thing itll be like malware fake crashes too!! - one time you'll be forced to make a choice and all the options will seem bad and then like,, a little bit after but not immediately, just enough for you to get a taste of the concequences, at a seemingly random time (maybe there's a window in there oo that'd be fun), it'll close itself under the guise of a crash, and then you'll have to make the awful and hard choice again. and if you choose something different ur characters are like 'haven't you made me suffer enough? are you hell bent on seeing me in pain?" - i wanna make the window! look! like! it's! dripping! a character exists the window later because they're so angry with you they can't contain it. - pop ups on the actual computer screen - you get a neat little cursor in game and then at some points it starts moving on its own - the in game close button will move itself if you try and click it. - the game has second person narriation for flavour text and things and sometimes it'll go first place with smething jarringly different than what you expect the player cjharatcer to say and then when you click it again its "normal" (like, say its been established over and over that the player character loves oranges and then u click on something orange related and the narrations like 'disgusting things id love to seen smashed to pieces and consumed by maggots' and then u click it again and then its like 'you appreciate the painting of an orange fruit =D" - you can't play the game again once its finished because theres a little file hidden on your computer so when u open it its a dark screen or something and if you delete it ***there's another secret back up file*** and it punishes youb for deleting it or mocks you or something - graphics are all pixels and such until it decides to switch to photo realistic for sake of freakyness, i know its classic but its banger - yes we r detecting ur name and calling you by it but i will also allow u to change ur name with no concequence because Trans Rights - you WILL play the game in windowed mode and if you move the window outside the boundries of the moniter the chaaracters will cry and scream about the darkness and the horrors beyond the walls. - can we change the background to ur favourite character and then glitch em out? why yes we can you clicked the disclaimer u knew this was coming. - it's gonna ask u a whole bunch of innocuous questions about ur preferences and some of them will come back and some wont but some of em will be like "favourite colour" and some will be like "choose one body part to save legs or arms" and when the favourite colour question comes back its gonna send so much distress to the player but the other questions not coming back lmao its just there to scare you - there are voices in the audio tracks and they get added in and taken away. they are saying things for real but they're heavily distorted - there r no jumpscares btw its all atmosphere, jumpscares r cheap im more epic than that.

theoretically if i had the coding skills i would make a video game i woulsn't be able to stand playing myself

[ivyuns]

love me in a year ✰❆♣♞

bang chan

genre: angst, fluff 

word count: 2.4k

warnings: kidnapping, restraints, y/n gets pregnant, grinding, drowning, weapons, a bit suggestive. if i missed anything lol oops

A/N: another shet show + from 365 dni (the ending isnt exactly like the movie btw)

for my gurlieeeee + happy birthday to @stanstraykidswoo​ <3

masterlist

mafialeader!bangchan x fem!reader

enjoying the summer breeze on the islands of hawaii, next to your friend made you feel relaxed. from all the work and stress you did, you finally earned yourself a vacation.

“babe!”

opening your eyes, you see your boyfriend (in a unhappy relationship) walks towards you. taking off your glasses and sitting up next to the pool, waiting what your boyfriend had to tell you. “i just got back from seeing the volcanoes babe! you shouldve seen it-” “we were supposed to go look at it together, dumbass” you cut your boyfriend off.

“w-wait y/n-” running away before he said anything, you got lost in a dark area. wasnt just sunny? seeing a group of guys look at you while trying to come closer. damn these outfits. your outfit consist of a short flowy, off the shoulder dress with heels. running with shaky legs, you looked around and saw everything get dark.

“are you lost babygirl?”

waking up in a soft bed, you look over and look at the unfamiliar room youre in. “where am i?” you whispered softly. walking towards a door to the hallway, the door wont budge open. shaking the door knob, it still wont burst open. giving up, you go lay back down on the bed.

closing your eyes to relax, you hear the door unlocking. quickly putting on your heels, you open the door and see nobody. following to which ever door took you, it seem endless. the endless numbers of stairs and doors you went though, you came across to a massive painting of a portrait of yourself hanging on the dinning room’s wall.

“oh my god”

continuing to follow where your legs take you, you were yanked away from seeking to your freedom. “are you lost babygirl?”. feeling someones presence behind you, you see a man. someone who you never seen.

“who are you and what do you want from me” you say and slowly back away from him. “chris is the name. you see, five years ago, i saw you on a beach. then suddenly i got shot and all i could think was you. these pass five years, ive been trying to find you and now” chris pauses his sentence and walks to a cup of ice, making you suck on it. “now i have you”

spitting the ice out, you got angry. “so what? you think kidnapping me is some kind of way to have me?” chris gets angry after your tone of your voice you gave him. he pushes you on a chair and chokes you lightly.

“i will give you 365 days to make you fall in love with me. and if that doesnt work, i will release you.” chris slowly lets go of your neck and continues talking. “i promise i will not touch you without your permission.”

chris gets interrupt by his phone. reaching his pocket, he sees his mafia friend who works with him calling him for help in the front. running to where to meet him at, you gave a few minutes before running on your feet again, trying to escape.

finally outside with a big open field in front of you, where you will be free. running, you stop midway as you see chris kill a man. witnessing what happened, you pass out due to pressure from everything.

-

the next morning, you wake up in the same room before but a whole different dress on you and a shirtless chris sitting in a chair in front of you. “let me out of here now” you shouted at him. “i need to get back to my family, my boyfriend!”. “you really think he still loves you? take a look at this” chris says and throws a small stack of pictures. pictures of him fucking another girl.

“a-are you serious?”

“yes im serious. oh and we’ll be leaving this place tomorrow. be ready” chris says and exits the room. “where are we going?” you quickly grab his wrist and stops. “to australia”

landing and going to the hotel. chris stops you and gives you the keycard to your room. “my room is next to yours if you need me”. nodding your head a yes, you enter your room and place your bags down and sighed. what is happening right now.

chris walks out of his room to see you look like a goddess. “y/n” chris calls out. turning around, chris grins with his dimples showing and grabbing your hand to head to the place you two are meeting with. chris opens the passenger door for you and makes his way to the drivers seat after youre in. while driving, he places his hands on your thigh, making you want more of him. avoiding his hand, you close your eyes.

arriving at your destination, it turns out to a bar. entering the bar, chris leads you to a room. seeing people, you hide behind chris bc youre antisocial as fuck

“y/n, this is aeyeong. ayeong meet-” “y/n. yes i know her name” aeyeong says, looking at you then back to chris, seducing him. “you know y/n, me and chris used to talk.” walking up to you. “and fucked each other” aeyeongs whispers into your ear. feeling chris wrap his hands around yours, you push him away and left the room.

“this happened a long time ago-” feeling tense, chris was about to turn and find you til aeyeong grabbed his wrist. “i thought you said we would last forever hm? took you long enough to find her. even of all our messages.” aeyeong grabs her phone and pulls up their naked bodies in photos. sexting.

“enough aeyeong.” chris grabs her phone and throws it onto the floor. running out of the room to look for you, leaving aeyeong to laugh.

-

“mr bang!”

chris turns around and sees his partner running to him. “y-y/n. shes with aeyeongs boss. i just got a call from him-” “shut the fuck up and tell me which room” “room 325.”

chris runs to room 325 and sees you grind on the boss. “y/n” chris growls. not paying attention to chris, you feel aeyeong’s boss grope your ass and suddenly putting a knife towards your neck.

suddenly feeling someone pull you away from the man and unable seeing things, chris and the rest of his members pulls out their weapon.

opening your eyes and see yourself on a yacht, you walk around and find chris. seeing chris talk shit about you to his other partner. “she just really had to run away-”

“im sorry chris” you spoke out. chris turns around and tells his partner to leave for a moment. “this is all your fault. youre the one who left the room and potentially tried to seduce him. do you not know what he couldve done?”

arguing on the boat and heading to the railings, you slip off and fall into the water. panicking, chris falls into the water and saves you. taking you out of the water and goes to lay you down on the bed and stands by your side.

a few minutes later, you wake up with water coming out of your mouth, coughing. chris turns around and goes to you with worried eyes. “y/n, i-im sorry. please dont leave me, i need you” chris softly says and strokes your hair with tears starting to fall down his cheeks.

lifting your weak hands up to caress his cheeks, you pushed him down and began kissing him roughly. regretting as soon as you saw the red in his eyes. “so now you want it?” chris growls and begins to attack you with kisses and hickies. feeling your clothes ripped away from you.

a few weeks later, youre back in korea. chris leaves you for the day, saying he has business to attend to and will call you later. but hours flew by and still didnt have any calls. sighing, you call your best friend, minyeong who yells at you though the speakers after the first ring.

“are you kidding me y/n? you cant just leave me behind at hawaii?!”

“i know i know, ill explain if you come over”

after she hears you say the sentence, she hangs up and runs to your place. opening the door for her, she starts speaking nonsense and you just laughing at her.

“y/n, this is serious. stop laughing and tell me what happened.”

sitting down next to her, you tell her everything. even when you love him back. minyeong at first didnt like what chris did to you and what his job it, but you beg her for you to have happiness atlas. with minyeong wanting you to be the happiest, you two go to the bar.

feeling someones eyes on you, you told minyeong you were going to the restrooms as she continues dancing. almost at the door, someone slams you onto the wall. “y/n, baby. i missed you so much. im sorry-” feeling tears streaming as you remember the past events and pictures. you forced him to let go of you and run back to your place.

he follows you back to your apartment without you noticing and as you take a seat with his loud voice scares you. “baby please” he goes closer to you and tries to kiss you until a voice rang.

“im pretty sure she wants you to leave”

he looks at chris then back to you then slaps you. “you fucking whore. youve been cheating on me when you left me didnt you” shaking your head a no and the tears uncontrollably falling as you try to shield yourself from another slap.

receiving nothing, you look up and see chris holding his wrist to prevent him from hitting you. “if theres someone else who was cheating is you. now leave you fucker” chris whispers in his ears and runs away.

chris looks down and sees your shaking figure. he goes next to you and wraps his arms around you so you can start feel calm. reaching to that point, chris picks you up and lays you on the bed.

slowly kissing you from your lips to your chest. chris begins undressing you til you stop him. unbuttoning his top, you see the semi open wound from his business. grazing your fingers over it as you hear chris slightly whimper.

“chris, im in love with you”

chris smiles widely. “im in love with you too”. you two continue the heavy make out which turns into a passionate sex for you both.

waking up with you on chris’ chest, you feel him showing a smile. he turns to the nightstand and grabs something small but worthy.

“y/n l/n, would you please marry me?”

nodding your head yes a bunch of times, you kiss chris on the lips.

-

heading back to hawaii, youre back into the palace where chris kept you in. waking up from your slumber, you go outside and talk to chris. chris sees you and tells his partner that he’ll be right back.

“hey hey babygirl, what happened? you alright?” chris leaves his seat to go to you as you start feeling shitty. “chris, i dont feel goo-” your eyes are shut closed and almost falls on the hard concrete til chris caught you.

“c-changbin! help!” chris yells out to whoever is out. your lips are slowly turning pale. changbin runs to chris with a blanket to cover your cold body and helps him carry you to the car. changbin speeds to the hospital with chris’ tears falling onto you, holding your hands and kissing the back of it. “please be okay, please please” chris whispers.

changbin parks at the emergency lot and chris grabs your body and puts you on the stretcher as the nurses sees you two. “please save her” the nurses all nodded their head and disappeared into the doors with a chris on the floor, sobbing his heart out, praying for you to be okay.

-

finally hours passed by and chris was left alone as he told changbin to go back to the palace. eyes all red and puffy with his legs shaking, full of anxiety. “mr bang?” the doctors call out chris. he stands up too quickly, making him almost loose his balance but the doctor helps him balance for a few seconds. thanking him, he follows the doctor to your room.

chris runs to your side as he sees your eyes open, with all type of wires attached to you. “y/n baby are you okay?”. nodding yes with a small smile, chris looks at the doctor.

“it looks like miss y/n was 1 month pregnant. and also looks like she wasnt taking care of herself either so mr bang, do y/n a favor and help not only her, but the baby”

you and chris nod your head, understanding as the doctor leaves you two. chris turns into his soft self. “i love you” he giggles. “i love you too chris”. scooting further away from him, you pat on the empty spot on the bed for him. chris smiles widely and goes to lay down next to you. you fall asleep from the warmth of your fiance as he hugs you. “and i love you too baby” he whispers and puts his free hand on your growing stomach. kissing your head and falling asleep next to the love of his life.

END <3

[sleephyuns]

He hadn’t really planned to stay the night. Really he hadn’t. That was the first thought that finally processed through his brain as he woke up. Now he sits up in a bed that isn’t his, yawn echoing in a room that also isn’t his, blinking sleep out of his eyes.

Before he takes in his surroundings, he mentally prepares himself for whatever disappointment may come as he scans the room. But there’s nothing immediate. No note telling him to be out by a certain time. No one’s disgruntled ex walking in on him laying there. It’s a nice change of pace. But still, he really didn’t meant to stay.

He shifts in bed, back cracking a bit in protest, begging him not to move just yet. So he lays back against the sheets (there’s a sweet, balmy vanilla scent from them. one that warms him up in a way that he likes) and closes his eyes for just a few moments more. But a few moments only lasts about a minute or so until theres a vibration on the nightstand next to him. At least his phone was close by. He extends an arm to pick it up, checking who it is.

Mina.

She’s not prying. She never does, since she’s used to this by now. She just asks if he’s ok, if he’s awake even. And he has no problem texting back a simple “im fine. be back later” and “good morning btw” before setting his phone aside again.

9 am. That wasn’t too late. He still had time to get in a morning jog before class.

If he gets up now, that is.

With a sigh, he actually rises, stretching again before he searches for his discarded clothes on the floor. He gets dressed in his usual order (trying his best to ignore how bad the feel of day old clothes are to him) and goes to the bedroom door.

Before he leaves, he figures he should at least check and see if this apartment is empty, to at least see if there’s anyone anywhere else in the apartment. A few more stretches, just to get the blood flowing, and he leaves the room. He looks at the few pictures on the walls framing the door, and smiles at what he sees. He can tell these two friends must be important, seeing as they show up in almost all of the photos. But he doesn’t look into them too much, even though he wants to. He shouldn’t pry. So he continues his little search.

But he doesn’t need to look far when he turns the corner. Because he finds Sana right there in the hallway, a plate in one hand and a glass of water in the other. And she flushes an even deeper shade than she had when she was under him last night.

“Well um... I wasn’t sure when you’d wake up before I left or not, but I made breakfast? I was gonna leave it on the nightstand but I should’ve known you’d wake up. You seem like the type to not sleep in. But I’m sorry I really should’ve known. Let me just-“

Momo steps forward and takes the plate from her hands. “Did you eat already?”

Sana blinks once. Twice. “Yeah I did.”

“Ok that’s good. How about I sit back in bed and eat this and we can talk? At least until you have to go.”

“Um, sure.”

They walked back into the room in silence. Sana sat the edge of the bed, watching him as he ate diligently. He thinks about teasing her for being so trusting of him, being willing to let someone she’s known for only a few days oversleep at her apartment, and even be willing to leave said person alone. But he doesn’t, and they stay silent. It went on like that for a while, until Momo got to the last of the three pancakes Sana made for him.

“This one is shaped a little weird,” Momo laughs, “ran out of batter?”

Sana shakes herself from her staring, getting a little flustered again. But inly slightly so. “Well it was supposed to be a dog... I figured since you talked about how much you thought of getting one it would be nice.”

“Oh... I see,” he smiles to himself. And now that he looks at it, he supposes he can see it. If he closes one eye. And maybe tilts his head. He goes back to eating, but the next question makes him nearly choke on the food in his mouth.

“Did you want this to be a one time thing?”

He takes a swig from the glass to ease his choking. Then looks to Sana.

“What made you ask that?”

Sana twirls a few strands of hair around her finger. “Well you were dressed and all. I thought maybe you wanted to leave and have that be it.”

That confuses Momo more than anything. “I thought you were gone so I had planned on leaving. I left the room to check actually.”

Sana nods like she doesn’t quite believe him. Not that he can blame her really. He doesn’t necessarily have the best track record.

And Sana asks again, “So, did you want this to be a one time thing?”

He looks back down at the plate. If he were being honest, he doesn’t know. He really doesn’t. He had fun with Sana last night. That was sure. But he didn’t know Sana too well. All the more chance to learn about her, yes, but what if something went wrong? What if he got invested just for her to get tired of him? It’d happened before. So who was to say it wouldn’t happen again?

His hand clenches and unclenches nervously at his side. Sana must notice, he thinks. But he doesn’t really know what to say when he’s put on the spot like that.

Thankfully, Sana speaks up for him. “Hey,” she calls, voice soft, “I can tell you’re overthinking something. Not sure what, but I do the same.” She scoots a little closer, testing the waters. He’s not going to push her away. Not when she managed to have such a soothing presence despite her being the focus of his dilemma. “How about you finish eating and I’ll head out?” There’s a certain sadness clinging to her words, one that he doesn’t like. He wishes clearing up her worries was simple.

...But maybe it doesn’t have to be so hard.

“We have each others’ numbers,” he states.

Sana looks just as confused as he had before. “We do...” she trails off, waiting for him to elaborate.

Instead, he takes the chance to take in all her features. The way her eyebrows are currently quirked up, the roundness of her cheeks that he knows only get fuller when she laughs or smiles, the slope of her nose, the softness of her lips. He doesn’t look into her eyes, but for the brief time he had last night, he remembers how warm they were.

And then he continues, “You have my number. You can text me whenever. I’ll respond.”

Sana doesn’t say anything for a bit, and he worries that isn’t enough of an answer. But then a light, airy giggle graces his ears, and he lets out a little breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding. “Ok,” she sighs.

“Ok?” he asks back.

Sana makes a little hum of approval. “Yep that’s ok.” She leans over and presses a kiss to his cheek. It feels nice, makes his heart flutter a bit. “You can text me too though, you know,” she teases as she gets up from the bed. “Maybe today even.”

Mom watches her as she grabs her things before heading back to the door. “Maybe,” he smiles. And with a think thrown his way, Sana walks out of the room. And it’s only another second that passes before he hears the front door slam closed.

It was strange how much could be said between them with only a few words.

[dragqueenpentheus]

Okay no one has to read this but i DO have to write it:

PYROC VS FATHER PAUL

Ya bitch needs an art break bc im getting angry about voices existing as i try to keep myself entertained. Today is NOT a god one for sinking into repetitive line work and that’s just about all i have on the table atm

SO! Im gunna do a little thinking about my little meow meows all fucked up by religion. Just a comparison for my sanity and interests. Pyroc is my baby i wrote him for the first time years ago. Five?????????? Whadda hell. Going on six.

ANYWAY john joined religion because of his trauma. His sister died and he felt lost. He was unmoored in this fishing village and looking for reason looking for hope. Hed had his heart broken and trying to make sense of tragedy on his own was totally beyond him. Thats why his interactions with riley in AA are SO good like. He knows that confusion and he knows the rhetoric that’s supposed to combat it. Only it dooesnt work for riley.

The same sort of thing happens for pyrc, only inverted. Loss urns him away from god and religion because its SO strong in his family and not only is he loosing trust in god, but his kin as well. He’s suspicious there’s mre they arent telling him, at the point of his fathers death. And he agrees to, on the surface, absolutely wholly throw himself in to being the second the family and the village need. But he’s keeping his treachery under wraps.

That’s one of the coolest things about father paul imo is like. That slow unraveling of what is. Frankly. An awful half assed plan, driven by fear and loneliness and desperation and dementia and love. Even VERY obvious things like. Taking down the newspaper photo of his young self ‘slip’ by him. I think, on some level, its DEEPLY intentional. He wants people to CHOOSE this. He wants people like bev. He wants people who see him and are in aw of him beating god. Of killing death. He wants to be worshiped and adored and for people to come to him willingly, no tragedy driving them to his arms.

Pyroc also wnats to be worshipped, but he ALSO wants to do the worshipping. He really longs for an element of almost????? But not quite??? Subjection?? He wants to be shown something and for a Great Voice to tell him, unquestioningly and unerringly that it is GOOD. Full stop. And then he wants to spend his life worshipping it. But this booko is an exploration of how….. no such thing exists. And more importantly no great voice exists either. There is nothing wholly good, nothing wholy evil. His lack of faith in himself once he becomes god is him starting to understand that as well. Thats on purpose baked into the lore. The starting point was ‘what if god was a position and in order to get promoted you had to be a murderer. No matter what’. He understands things are not wholly good, at that point. I onder how long it will be for him to realize they are not fully evil as well?

Bc pruitt does hm hm hm an interesting move. Where he takes something the narritve is very sure to communicate is EVIL no wiggle room just fact. Even if its driven by animal instinct its. Evil. And he makes it, not just good, but HOLY. And god i LOVEEEE that for him i ADOREEE that what a MOVE. Driven by desperation and dementia and relief and ‘if god saved me than maybe i can be good despite loving and sinning and maybe if i defeat god then i will be Thee Good’. SO sexy of him. Im really fascinated by his morality. He seems to have an understanding of the shades of grey in some respects??? But if he had a BETTER one with more forgiveness in his heart i feel like hed have left the church anyway after sarah was born??? Even if millie didnt ask him??? That might just be my own sensibilities creeping in but ….. like he culd have seen her on the weekends. He can do other jobs. Hes straight (??? Not totally convinced of this) he could have just dated her that makes me crazy. LIKE OBV HE HAD LINES HE THOUGHT THAT WOULD CROSS AND HE HAD INTERNALIZED THE CHURCH AND THE RULES AND SHE WAS MARRIED AND ECT ECT i know he couldnt have really but. Thye were straight. They coulda.

Im not gunna do fantasy homophobia bc i think its …………….. Boring. But i think some element of??? The vindlegaurd line MUST be passed along and for that particular rules must be applied. But thats also boring as hell :/ maybe i can work in my parthenogenesis lore?????????? I bet pyroc would love building that spell in any universe. That’s the sequal when he goes to magic university in helsin. But yeah i do like the concept that. Anyone can have a baby thru magic its just a time and energy commitment. Just a matter of wanting it enough together. Every baby is so deeply wanted and its mere existence is proof. Thats dope i love that. HMMM to be decided at a later date when im deeper into the story i think. I still havent figured out fully how and where and why orion is going to be invovled and if???? Pyroc and orion are even going to be romantic??????? Im torn im TORn…….

Thikns about john bonding w sarah over science and learning and starts wEEPING…. Like theres some surity beloved. Its just a matter of uncovering. I think sarah felt that same thirst for answers and hunted them differently. Her faith is in logic and science. I loveeee her god. Every scene w her and her dad absolutely RUIN me like!!!!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW LOVED SHE IS!!!!!! I hope at hte very end she saw the blood as the gesture of love it SO clearly was and not him trying to poison her. God i love that she spat it out. GOD. Thats about being gay, btw. Spits the religious offering that could save you across the gasoline soaked church floor like BABE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think we as a collective should talk about the possibiites around sarah/erin more. Bc their defiance combined would be. Earth SHATTERING for crockett.

In the future pyroc gets a kid. Ever since that campaign where Enemy ended up playing his daughter im like. How did i NOT know this idiot wanted nothing more in the entire world than to travel it with his daughter. I dont care how or why hes getting a kid. Hed be so doting and awful abut it. He would need orion as a co-parent for the kids self esteem to be normal levels. thINKS ABOUT PAUL GETTING TO RAISE SARAH AND JUST ABSOLUTELY GASSING HER UPPPPPPPP HANGING EVERY DOODLE SHE EVER MADE ON TEH FRIDGE. BOASTING ABOUT HER SCEINECE PROJECT OT ANYONE WITHIN EYESIGHT EVEN THOUGH ‘WE K N O W JOHNWE WERE ALL AT THE SCEINCE FAIR’!!!!!!!!!!! Let these fuck ups be doting fathers im fucking begging. That scene where paul is like. You take ccare of everyone on the island sarah. Its more than being a doctor. You comfort them.

HM HM comfort is such a thing for Miss Bitch like!! He sees it as a Good Thing. He tries to bring it for riley by asking to hold the AA meetings on island ((also manipulation. Obvously also manipulation. I wouldnt have bene shocked if he was slipping the vampire blood into the coffee every meeting either. But thats just a theory. A game theory.)) ANYWAY he sees comfort as hly. The church gave it to him when he needed it. The angel gave it to him in the cave. Feeling safe and warm is HIGH on his list of priorities and what makes him hand over respect.

I think pyroc has lived a very comfortable life in SO many ways, but in none he. Activly recognizes. A key part of his character arc his him…. Opening his eyes to the world around them. Seeing the privilege he has and being like. Wait. This isnt Right. We have to change thi. And when no one agrees ti shifts to I have to change this. With Violence. A little revolutionary <3 it only costs the life of his whole ass family

Thats more fun comparison ground like…… paul is SO much about I know whats right and there is a cost but i AM ignoring it. Like HE KNOOOOWSSSS he knooooows he just doesnt want o See. I’m not sure if im going to surprise yroc with the ……megadeath of. His whole family. Or if it’s a choice he has to activly make. I think a choice makes it more compelling, more layerd. It has to be in the moment though, becaus ei think thats. A key difference between them. Pyroc wouldnt do it.. hed just leave hed peace out and do what he could in small ways. But he wouldnt do his big stand off with god. Hed shrink his goals in order to not hurt his family. Out of love?? Intimidation?? Some instinct wihtin him that balks at the idea of disobedience??? I think even he doesnt know. But i LOVE john becaue he jsut decides to lie. He closes his eyes and says i am being stupid on purpose. I think thats PERHAPS more compelling than good guy coward pyroc BUT!!!!! Thats who he is rip to ths little man. Cant change him now hes a whole ass child in my head. The PLOT i can change. Him….. not without massive character development <3

UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MM set my brain on FIRE!!!! Im so glad nano is coming up. I love sharpening pyroc against the comparison of other AMAZING characters. Father paul hill my beloved millstone <3 anyway sorry to anyone who reads this its literally me unhinging my jaw and emptying my brain out. I had to write stuff that wasn’t novel or fic. A little character time down and dirty. I wil NOT be editing this love and light to future me trying to decode this

[we-always-hit-our-ass]

Okay, but I need some Joe Toye headcanons like I need air. Help a girl out

Taglist: @floydtab, @deldontplay, @thatsonefishyboi, @noneofurbusinez, @meteora-fc, @hufflepuffpancakes

I just want to say that i love toye more than i love myself. This boy deserves everything and i mean it!

Btw thanks @adamantiumdragonfly for requesting these lovely hcs, i had a lot of fun writing this! 💕💕

General/Fluffy HCs for Joe Toye

--------------------

-------------------

so you see right here, this man is a professional lover and sweetheart extraordinaire 

you two actually met when running currahee

joe stumbled along the way and you gripped his arm to prevent him from falling

thought it was one of the boys like like luz or guarnere or just practically anybody

boy WAS HE WRONG

he was instantly like !!!!! but it soon turned into 💕💕💕

immediately thinks he died during training and went into heaven

looks like he is having the time of his life, he is by the way

you ask him if he’s ok as youre running along side him

joe nods his head slowly like the cute dope that he is

either of you could have fallen behind or could have run faster but nope!

you two keep the same pace as each other so y’all arent seperated and lose sight of each other

after that, you and joe are close as fuc-

when i mean close i MEANT CLOSE

theres endless laughter and happiness

snarky and sassy remarks from both parties

and you two doing whatever- 

literally toye is one of the people that you can never get mad at-

its impossible for him to make you mad i swear, he’s just too sweet and caring and this man can never do any wrong-

sooooo u and joe might or might not have huge crushes on each other

i'm just saying, but u two totally do-

if you were to walk into a room that joe was in, his eyes immediately go to you, because why not?

like seriously, joe would literally try to freeze the sun for you

but whenever you thank him he’s all like “that’s what best friends are for”-

the easy boys are so done believe me so they just watch in the background while commenting how stupidly cute u both are-

joe enjoys being sweet to you but he’ll never say it

you point it out sometimes while smiling and joe just erupts into flames

joe would never admit it, and this is a very well kept secret of his, only person who knows abt it is HIM and him alone

so basically during eindhoven, joe purposely yeeted his face away when a girl tried to kiss him and no one knew why-

after the day you met him, he made sure that lips were only reserved for u

everyone thought it was weird how he would launch himself away from the girls but you found it cute

you teased him a lot after that day and joe would act like he’s offended but in reality he's so goddamn head over heels for you-

joe legit doesn't know what to do around you, you're just so amazing

you and toye could either be the kids or the parents in the group, its an amazing vibe-

okok but the way he confessed to you was soo MMMM-

joe woke you up in the middle of the night to see the stars

after a few words of persuasion, you went outside with him and with your hand in his as he led the way

y’all sit down and when you gaze up at the sky, holy SHIT it was very beautiful-

toye loved your reaction and the smile you gave him after was worth way more than any fucking treasure-

joe was surprised when he didn’t stutter when he told u how much he loved you-

like if you were sleepy- not anymore! 

you immediately woke up and just stared at him for a good couple of minutes

but damn you told him how much loved him too- but like seriously picture this

midnight, stars, love confessions, and tender and passionate kisses with joe fucking toye-

it wasnt what you were expecting but excuse it was so fucking good-

btw this boy’s spunky attitude will bring you to tears-

like hes overly sarcastic and you would just burst up laughing because its so fucking funny-

one of the things you also love about joe is that he’s a sassy boy who’s actually very sweet once you get to know him

this is one the many things that made you fall from him-

when joey gets tipsy he will lean on you for support and will deny that he’s drunk

toye will also drunkenly say how much he loves you and that youre the best person ever-

toye will end up falling asleep after you run your hands through his dark hair while he’s cuddled up against you-

you fall asleep not so long afterwards

YO- joey boy cherishes everything you give him and he just really appreciate the little things that you do

like if you hold a door open for him or even just pick out stuff that got stuck in his hair i'm pretty sure he’ll think about for days on end

hes also genuinely enjoys it when you talk to him about things you are very passionate about

like toye will literally just come up with the stupidest conversations just so he can hear talk and you can say the same for him

his voice is so fucking perfect and its always immediately recognizable 😩👌

toye will iNDEED bring you small gifts that he thinks you might like-

joey is very VERY protective of you

like if he sees a person making you feel discomfort in anyway he will yeet the poor bastard

he doesn't go completely overboard, most of the time, he just really wants you to be safe

you two still having your weekend passes are VERY rare since sobel likes being a lil bitch

wo when you two actually have it, joe makes sure to make it count

he takes you to the bar sometimes while other times he takes you into town to ditch the noise and his hella drunk friends

um so he takes you around the stores and shops and you two will impulsively buy the randomest shit

the easy boys immediately stop trusting u both with money

yeah the items you two buy are cute but they have no literal use

during one of these trips joe buys you a really gorgeous necklace and you just ascended-

im not kidding

you never took off the necklace off your neck after that day

toye also gives you small gifts and lemme tell this boy even gives you a small camera

both you and toye take pictures of each other with it and the both of you always make sure to keep photos of one another

joe is also one of those boyfriends who has a surprise for you each and every single day-

either he’d take you swimming, riding bikes, eating at a diner, or watching a simple movie together

no matter how simple the activity, joe will find a way to make it the best experience you will ever have-

when watching a movie, joe would put snarky remarks in between the scenes and the experience is just alleviated-

when you two wake up next to each other in the morning, its the most peaceful little thing that has ever existed

sometimes you would wake up earlier and joe would still be asleep with his arms around you

toye will unknowingly pull you closer to him and wont let you go for a very long time-

did i mention toye’s devilishly cute morning voice??? 

his little good morning cuddles are pure and utter fluff and you will never get tired of it!

toye will surprise you with random hugs from behind every single day-

it soon became one of the things that you couldn’t live without

like he so tender, yet firm? and the hug is so fucking comforting what???

toye will hug you anytime and anywhere

his hugs bring you the most source of joy and they just make you so happy

if youre tired when he hugs you, you are immediately energized from the complete act alone

if youre sad, joe’s hugs will comfort you and you’ll just smile into his chest and his arms are wrapped around your waist

when youre angry, you just cool down in his touch- 

his hugs give you life and just repel off any negative emotions

if you were to be honest, toye and his hugs are probably your most favorite things in the whole entire world-

toye is just an overall very caring and hella GOOD boyfriend 

it has come to the point where both of you cannot exist without the other-

you love him with all of your heart and he loves you with all of his 😩💕

------------------------

-------------------------

im sorry for any mistakes that i made and i hope that everything is alright. btw im sorry for me taking so long to write this, i tried my best to finish it! 

but i love toye and he’s complete and utter perfection, thank you very much-

thank you for reading this and supporting me you guys are everything! 😩😊💕💕💕

[oikawa13]

love in the time of köttbullar

Shouyou sets the bowl on the tiny table with a flourish and an itadakimasu! and this is when it hits Atsumu harder than a Skurup to the temple:He wants this. Shouyou, hip cocked against the miniature kitchen countertop, smiling shyly up at Atsumu through the amber fan of his lashes, beautiful god-boy-man somehow glowing gold even under the buzzy LED lighting. Though they’re standing in a 430,000 square foot warehouse in Tsurumachi, Atsumu’s looking at Shouyou, and he’s home.

Amid the Flärdfull and the Smörboll, Miya Atsumu falls a little more in love.

words: 3,378 | rating: T

i’ve never been inside an ikea so this fic quite literally changed me as a person. sometimes loving a person is as scary as saying that first i love you!!!! and sometimes... love is easy as saying i love you at an ikea ; ;

LAUNCHING MERRILY DOWN THE PATH OF SIN (THE FIRST TIME)

"Bokuto said I should bring you home. But I don’t know where you live. So I took you here.”

“To hell?”

"No, Atsumu-san. To my apartment."

words: 1,990 | rating T

i wake up in the middle of the night thinking about this fic and then go on ao3 to reread it again its just so fdjgfhdjf good. i think about this shoyo a lot. theres something!!!! very dreamy going on here. this is the first part to a series btw, you can read them all if you want since theyre probably all around 1k :-)

lord i no longer believe in anything but the way he holds my name between his teeth

The miracle of the rabbit on the moon.

“We took this photo at their seventh birthday party. His father baked a cake. But someone ate all the jellybeans off the top before they could even sing the birthday song. That’s why Atsumu cried. He used to cry a lot. It stopped when the twins found out about volleyball, but before that Atsumu would cry over everything. Spilled milk. A skinned knee. The neighbor’s dog. He was the twin that was scared of paper straws. It's funny how things have changed.

“He looks happier now. Did you do that?”

words: 10,456 | rating: T

so, this goes just a liiiiitle past 10k so its up to you if you want to read it or not, i just thought i’d include it since its so! close! lol theres this part!!!!! they are holding hands underneath the table!!!!!!!!! atsumu are you drunk?!!! no!!!!! hes just so stupidly in love with shoyo. i cant stand them!!!!!!!!!!!

wait for it, wait for it

The notifications are up at 100+ again and Hana wants to check it quickly to make sure nothing's wrong, especially because she'd just cleared them before the media scrum. The fans, she figured, must be overjoyed with the win.Congratulations MSBY Nation!!! the first reply reads. #myspiker #atsuhinaBoth tags, she finds, are currently trending in Japan.

Five times #atsuhina trended on volleyball Twitter and one time it should have (but luckily didn't), as told by the MSBY Black Jackals' junior publicist

words: 6,043 | rating: T

this fic is SOOOOO much fun!!!!!! also i love hana, idk if i ever mentioned that before but yeah. this is like... hdjkdhgjfd so much ; ; <3

south of an early summer

Warmth, then, was being wanted back. Two weeks later, Atsumu holds that warmth in by Shouyou’s waist; he watches it, how it sleeps, and wonders what the heat will become next.

words: 2,602 | rating T | tw: atsumu being atsumu about (past) kg/hn for a split second

IF i wasnt an absolute fool and gave you all these recommendations to pick and choose from id just send you this and the walking emoji bc honestly!!!!!!!!! i may not know what the heck romantic means but i see this and maybe it is romantic! maybe its not the average romantic idk?!!!! but i do know theres something beautiful here. love ?? ; ;

truths in two’s

Shouyou leaves for Brazil in two hours.

words: 8,300 | rating: T

LDR.... but like, in probably one of the easiest 2 breathe/good feeling fic for ldr!!!! idk im a baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ten reasons to break up with me: a love letter

1. It has to be you, ‘cause I won’t.

words: 4,197 | rating: T

pls....... i cant even THINK about this fic without crying okay!!!!!!!! insane. fuckign!!!! i love it so much, so much. it lives in my heart. this is the fic where i was like... i dont believe in love. yes i do. no<3 YES!!!!!!!! and cried and paced my room and finally FINALLY!!!!!! stopped feeling so hurt about hinata leaving for brazil again lmao!! like, i cant explain. this sounds crazy right???? anyway, i think... atsuhina can love each other so much it hurts when theyre apart but their love is so.... i mean......... they literally waited years to play together... so......... their love keeps them going..... GOODBYE!!!! i love listening to fka twigs cellophane & home with you and just..... being insane. 

just can’t help myself

Five times Hinata takes care of Atsumu, and one time Atsumu returns the favor.

words: 5,025 | rating: T

*think about atshn taking care of each other* *cries*

blue crush

And there’s a promise there, sewn into the easy curve of his lips: I’m not going anywhere, Atsumu-san. Glittering eyes that cut through the rain-blurry dark like a beacon when Shouyou turns back to look up at him. Even if you fuck up all of our dates.

Murphy’s Law as demonstrated by Miya Atsumu.

words: 2,297 | rating: T

atsumu trying very hard to have things perfect and romantic and even in the failures its still very lovely<3

If I’m Icarus, You Must be the Sun (Allow me Three Mistakes)

He wonders if Icarus felt like nothing was wrong with self-destructing, because he had reveled in the sun, if only for a little while.

Atsumu finds, loving Hinata is the same.

Atsumu's love over the years, and the mistakes that accompany it.

words: 4,620 | rating: T

i am...very weak to the whole icarus/sun thing with hinata and his ships. this one though......... i think about it A lot.

in your eyes, i see our future

“Yer’ a real sweetheart, Hinata Shouyou.”

Shouyou smiles brilliantly. “Only for you~”

He scoots over so Shouyou can sit next to him. He can smell the pineapple body wash Shouyou is so fond of the moment he sits down. Shouyou passes the tray over carefully before settling against the headboard comfortably.

“What’s the occasion?"

(Or, Atsumu just really wants to marry Shouyou.)

words: 9,769 | rating: T

fhdsjjkjfdsj goes crazy stupid over marriage!!!!! listen... i do not believe in marriage!!!!! but for atsuhina, oh you bet i do!!!! :-)

breathing a hello

There’s no significance to them ending up here except that both of their lives are held in the sway of volleyball. Everything else comes second.That’s the crux of it, really.

words: 2,826 | rating: T

gjhfsjkfd shhhhhhhhh. my heart is very soft when i think of them here, please..... just!!!! pls.

if you’re out there in the cold, i’ll cover you in moonlight

My [23M] best friend and ex-boyfriend [23M] is visiting me for a week, and my current boyfriend [24M] who agreed to all of this is suddenly withdrawing from me. Can I get some advice? Please? Anyone?

words: 8335 | rating: T | chapters: 3 | tw: past kg/hn 😳

this one is optional since you wanted one shots and theres 3 chapters here. my idea of romantic is...well, i especially love when one of them is acting hurtful/mean/difficult to the other bc their own personal issues but the other loves them anyway??? and then they work on that issue!!! just!!!!! ; ;

Love in the Time of Insomnia

And anyway Hinata was sprinting out faithfully after Atsumu, who had keys to the gym like a badass, and who was going to give his spikers a few more tosses after-hours without Meian knowing like the greatest, most generous badass the Jackals had ever seen. 

words: 2,457 | rating: G

running four kilometers just so atsumu can rest. this is what romantic means!!!! hdkshjfhdj

ode to what you’d have been

5 times it’s Kageyama’s fault and the 1 time Hinata realizes it has never been.

words: 3,628 | rating: G

loving someone including their flaws PART 2!!!!!! ok.... u might be like... um... this is romantic? hfdkhjfd LISTEN!!!! to me!!! there is nothing more romantic than being in love with someone and the ugly parts of them. going, i love you, all of you. and communication!!! and understanding!!! and feeling terrible and shitty and horrible but having the one you love accept you. and trying to help ease your mind, worries. *sobs real hard* also shout out 2 ‘okaaayy.... i hate sakusa now’

a shrine for a  boy

Despite his uncertainty about how to tell Atsumu of his move to São Paulo, Hinata takes action. Things do not go according to plan.

words: 2,447 | rating: G

hinatas time 2 be romantic and fail but its ok bc!!!!!!!!!! :-) they are just dummies in love<3

the greatest distance between you and longing is defeat

(In other words: Atsumu, let go. I’m here now.)

words: 3,310 | rating: G

um... *cries* post break up.... o_o!!!! god they really thought they could????? lmao!!!!!!

the tear in this (our gentle language)

“I’m going back to Brazil.”

He isn’t asking for permission. This isn’t a consultation. Hinata Shouyou informs his boyfriend at their after-practice practice. Miya Atsumu has a volleyball in each arm, trying to pick up a third. It drops and rolls away from him. The thud resounding in an empty gymnasium.

Shouyou had tried to envision Atsumu’s reaction many times. He never expected to be met with silence.

Alternatively: an exploration of Hinata Shouyou’s return to Brazil

words: 7,204 | rating: M

ldr CAN be romantic ok!!!!!!!! it takes a lot of communication, time, and love ; ;

evening sun

Atsumu looks at Shouyou and thinks, I want to know every inch of you.

words: 1,502 rating: M

[dementedgnomicwizard]

i preplanned those tunnel tweets + made a list of specifically what pictures i wanted and finished making the worms earlier this morning so like i wasnt Winging It at all but it sure felt like it! bc weve only ever gone to the tunnels as a group before, but today the only time i could go was in the 25 minutes before my evening class and no one else was free then so i was like whatever ill just go get my pictures and then to class and it’s fine. so i put my little sandwich baggie full of worms in my pocket and went over to the machinery building, which is where the tunnel entrance is, but the entrance is in the basement and there’s two ways to get into the basement both of which are almost always locked so i was like well i’ll just check and see if either of them are open. and it turned out the freight elevator was allowing trips to the basement so i got in and went down

the freight elevator spits you out in like this really cluttered and fucked-up looking storage basement basically which is where the tunnel entrance is and while the tunnel is dark the basement itself is usually lit by these shitty fluorescents HOWEVER! today when the elevator doors opened it was absolutely completely dark in the entire enormous basement. but at that point i was like i made it over here, i have my worms, i have my photo list, i have time before class, and what are the odds the elevator will be working again, ill just use my flashlight who cares. so i turned my flashlight on and started picking my way through to the tunnel entrance, except i stopped and made a detour to take pics in that little office room because i thought it would sorta look like the room where they found gertrude’s body and i could make a fun joke about it  ANYWAY as i’m coming out of the office room i notice that the stairway door directly across from me is open, which is weird because they’re Never open because they don’t want us to go down there. so i was like, shit, maintenance and/or security are down here and my only way out is the super obvious elevator so ill just wait them out so i like turned my flashlight off and crouched behind a bunch of shit

anyway i just sort of huddled in the dark for a while and soon enough it became clear that no one was actually coming so i took advantage of my proximity to the ground to scatter some worms and take that first worm pic where im pointing. and then i was like okay, might as well get the tunnel bit over with. so the area of the basement where the mouth of the tunnel is is closed off with this big metal fence and there’s like a wire-mesh on the front with a huge padlock only years and years of horrible college students have managed to sort of beat the bottom half of the gate a few inches outwards + compromise its integrity enough that its easy to pull far enough open for someone else to slip through. however my problems today were 1) like i said ive only ever gone with a group before, meaning i’d always had someone to hold the gate open for me, and i had never attempted to get through without assistance before let alone back out and 2) the gate is RIGHT next to the stairs that i mentioned earlier were open when they usually never are. so i stood there for a minute like... okay, say i DO try to get through myself, and i get stuck. OR, say that happens and THEN whoever was working down here comes back and im stuck so i get caught and in trouble.

and then i was like actually fuck it we ball so i like. sort of just got down fully on the ground (which was gross btw do not recommend) and like rolled and twisted and pushed myself around until i wiggled through. that was the moment when i sort of started to accept just how much tunnel dirt i was gonna be covered in by the end but it was so far past too late to back out so i headed into the tunnel entrance. it gets TRULY dark like really really soon after you walk in also like i thought the basement outside was dark because the lights were off but the tunnels are like....  DARK. anyway i stopped halfway down the entry tunnel to try and set up the like “worm door outline” thing from after MAG39 and like initially i had thought that i could figure out an okay way to at least temporarily get them on the wall bc theyre made of latex and super light but it was quickly apparent that that would not be the case so i found a patch of the floor that looked smooth enough to be a wall and set it up on there instead. so i’m like. squatting on the floor in this very dark and kind of gross tunnel, and i have my phone laying on the ground next to me flashlight-side-up so i can see as well as use both hands to dig cold little latex worms out of a sandwich baggie and arrange them in a pattern on the ground and the flashlight was lighting up the tunnel in the most fucked up way and it was dead silent and the WHOLE time i was like, and this is the moment when like a maintenance worker turns the corner and finds me and is just like, hello??? theres some clown playing with worms in the tunnel????

anyway that did not happen and instead i got my little doorway set up and then it was time to take the first pic (of the worm door by itself without me in it) which was when i realized that when i open my camera app my phone forcibly turns the flashlight off so every time i wanted to take a picture in the tunnels i was gonna have to turn my light off and just like chill alone in the pitch dark in a tiny tunnel for however long it took me to take each photo and i was like hm okay wig i guess so i took the door pic and then it took me like four tries to get myself positioned right for the cringe ass fail worms one because, surprisingly, it is difficult to position yourself directly in the center of an archway of worms that you cannot see, and while i was doing all those failed tries i got to spend a lot of time laying splayed out on my back in the dark on the tunnel floor anyway i got it finally so i just sort of kicked the worms to the sides and kept going in further. to get to the pit you have to turn left at the first fork and then take a right and then theres this weird like step? thing? in the middle of the tunnel and if youre me you have to do a super awkward crabwalk limbo step thing to get over it because the pipes on the ceiling above it are hot and the step comes up to like 6 inches below the pipe but also i dont like to touch the top of the step because its gross. so its always a production. this time i think they had worked on that pipe recently or something because it was leaking so the step was wet and the pipe dripped hot water onto my neck while i was crawling under it LMAO

anyway from there its a straight shot and it opens out into this like larger room near the entrance to the engine room and the pit is right at the edge of where the dirt of the tunnel turns into the concrete of the room floor. and theyve like half-covered the top of it in wooden planks but theyre not held down so when you have to step on them just for a second to get out of the tunnel its so nervewracking. theres overhead lights in that room though so that was nice idk if i couldve managed the flashlight-camera-transition in the dark AND one-handed. so i took my from-above tunnel pic and then i was like (checks my photos list) “well...... i did say id get two from inside the pit.” i had actually never been in the pit before because the other two times i’ve gone to the tunnels i’ve been with other people and they would barely even let me get near it let alone get on the ladder. so i was like well i guess there is a first time for everything so i put my phone in my back pocket and ducked under the little yellow chain they have up and started going down the ladder and i got like 8? maybe 10? feet down before i thought to look down again and let me just say..... all the times we had looked into that pit from above we had never guessed anywhere CLOSE to how deep it actually was. thats all. so i was like.... um i was expecting to be able to like, stand on solid ground while i take this pit selfie, but that was clearly not going to be an option, but also i had committed this far already to getting these pics from the pit so i was like ugh i guess and hooked my one arm over the ladder so i could get my phone out w the other hand and take the pics from in there. and then i climbed back out. the ladder rungs made my hands SO gross and dirty with rust i was like eugh eugh.

but after that the only picture left to take was the one w my pen and the only way for me to go was back out towards the entrance so i was like its fine im almost done. so i went back out until i got to the tunnel after the first fork and i was like cool here’s a good a place as any so i got my pen ready + went to get my camera out, and literally RIGHT as the flashlight went out and the camera app opened i was like SO sure i saw something move vaguely in the darkness to my right like REALLY close to me shoulder height so i was like uhhh no and took a flash photo more out of reflex than anything and i didnt see anything but also the flash lit up for like,  one second and then it was dark again so i like switched back to the flashlight really quick and obviously it was just a normal tunnel and i was the only one there so i opened the camera app again to try to take the pic again and literally just like the first time right as the flashlight turned off i was soooo sure something moved right next to me like so close but i was like “nell. youre being insane.” so i didnt do anything and i just took like three more possible variations on the pic i wanted and then i turned my flashlight back on and once again obviously nothing was amiss so i was like epic win and went back out the tunnel entrance. and then i was like............. oh god i have to do the gate squirm again. but there was no other way so i just did it really fast before i could really get worked up about it lol and then i went back over to the freight elevator only when i pressed the button it would light up and then immediately go dark when i unpressed it and i was like oh fuck because 90% of the time when you get in on the ground floor this elevator literally refuses to take you to the basement and i was like oh no it re-locked while i was down here and now i can’t get up this way so im just like in this basement for the foreseeable future but then of course as i was going down that tangent the elevator doors opened and i stepped into the fluorescent light and looked down and was like wow i am just so thoroughly, completely, orangely covered in dirt. but i made it home with like 5 minutes to wash up a bit before my evening class so that was a win! i did learn however that i should never take my evening dose of adderall directly after a bit of minor breaking&entering while the adrenaline is still there because when i got to class i almost jackhammered a hole through the floor with my shakyleg

[lockdownuk]

Lockdown Diary Part 4

A personal account during the lockdown in the UK due to the Covid-19 outbreak.

23/03/2020 8:30pm Boris Johnson, UK Prime Minister, gives a live address to the nation to, effectively, put the country on lockdown to stem the spread of the deadly coronavirus strain, Covid-19.

Many of us have been self-isolating for days but this latest development within the UK in reaction to the pandemic feels very serious and very scary. I decided to keep a simple diary and where better but online.

Day91: I can’t post photos to the sister photo diary and it’s fucking me off. Using this as a place holder- last successful pic was 21/06/2020.

Day 92: Still awaiting Tumblr re: day 91′s entry. Meanwhile looking at other blog/diary sites. Very warm today, like it was throughout May. Boris announced a further relaxation in lockdown measures which includes reducing the 2m distancing instruction which paves the way for pubs, restaurants and other places to open on 4th  . It looks like the Ship will open 6th July, George on the 4th. I await to see the measures put in place before deciding whther it’s a goer.

Day93: Typing on day 94 - I received an email from Deryn from RCI HR concerning placement online module attendance, thanking me for my participation. I was somewhat confused. Was this a mistake or was I erroneously not icluded in the initial communications? I fired off an email to HR and WhatsApp’d Jim. He replied that I should take it up with HR.

I am worried by this. Furlough ends this week and I know not what the fuck is going on.

Day 94: Had a few beers last night, ‘cos I was feeling deflated over work. Finished Homecoming S2, which was very good, and cancelled Amazon Prime before the free trial ends tomorrow. Got up @midday but haven’t done jack shit today as my right ankle is playing up - it was twinging last night - apart from press ups. No word back from RCI but there was a notification that the email from Deryn was attempted to be recalled. Had a spat in Co-Op wth two lads who were ignoring the one way system and social-distancing. It makes my blood boil and I had to say something which ended up making my blood boil even more…especially as one of them asked me to ‘crack on’. It’s a pretty cool response actually, since I had them bang to rights but, at the time, I thought I was going to bust a blood vessel. I walked away having told him to not speak to me like that again and that he was a fucking arsehole! Didn’t make me feel any better though. Fog’s chatting later so I’m going to have a few beers right now (just gone 8pm) - I feel like throwing caution to the wind for some reason (probably work more than anything else).

Day 95: Typing on Day 96. I had a lot of beers with Fog the night before last and felt like shit all day yesterday. Still managed to drag myself up to Foggy’s and have socially distanced beers in his garden with Noel and Lord Irish of Michael.

Day 96: Feeling like shit. Third day of no walking ‘cos my ankle is a little sore although I did walk back from Foggy’s last night.

Day 97: Two walks and my usual stair climb today. Felt good to get back to routine. Plus, no booze yesterday, even tho’ it was a Saturday, feel better for it. I heard from Sue Cockings from HR on Friday, btw, still furloughed until further notice.

Day 98: I discovered, yesterday, that today is actually day 99 of lockdown since it actually begun on the Sunday evening that Boris Johnson announced the measures being in place - I mistakenly thought it began on the Monday. Tumblr still haven’t got back to me regarding reviewing why this blog is deemed ‘sensitive’ and I can’t add any more pics. While I am typing, Northampton are beating Exeter 0-2 at Wembley in the L2 play-off final. It’s funny that their fans can’t be there to see it. Football, in general, on its return after lockdown, without fans in attendance, is shit - like watching women’s football - too many empty seats.

Day 100: I have decided to number the days correctly (See prev’ entry). It’s a good time as I had to export , delete and recreate this blog on Tumblr since they have been non-forthcoming in my request for info as to why they deemed it ‘sensitive’. So, this is a restart, altrough seemless to the reader. On top of all that, I am writing this on Day 101! After restarting the blog diary I forgot to add the day’s entry! Bumped into Roger on my second walk, at the top of Basset Ford Place. We chatted for an hour or so. It was really good to see him and talk. We’ve made a promise to interact more...it seems both he and I allow ourselves to get down in the dumps (easy in self-isolation) and, as such, we shall try to reach out as and when. He suggested a walk together every now and then.

Day 101: I heard back from a charitable services company that Barry Haddon (who, coincidentally, I spoke with today) told me about (Auriga)and answered their email questions. BNarry rates them and told me they got him some decent results like he no longer has to pay Council Tax. I tweeted Chris Hawkes on Radio 6 this morning...he was asking for examples of sames names (’cos he had Dave Gorman on) so I told him about The Redlion and the ad the ‘other’ Tim put in the ET. He read it out! I created a photo album of 101 pics I’ve taken in lockdown and put it on FB including the Oundle Chatter group. The comments were great. My right eyesight is worrying, I cannot make out close up detail i.e. reading is blurred. I am going to start doing 10 press ups after each exercise i.e. three times a day. I decided that during my second walk so today I’ve done 20. Lastly, I have new neighbours I do believe. Hmmm.

Day 102: Emailed dad and Rita to have a rant about what dad thought of the Leicester lockdown and to share a link to my 101 photo album. Had a long Messenger chat with Rog.

Day 103: Typing this on day 104. Dad called when I was out ona  walk so we skyped when I got back. He looks really well! Advided me on how to cutt some branches that are hanging low (I asked him in the email yesterday). I then borrowed a saw, secateurs and green bin from Karen. I walked a long way today. My second walk was 9km.I then had loads of beers! The Co-Op car park seems to be the venue for youngsters to hang out. I was gone 2am before they finished partying. I (re)watched Steve Jobs. Wow....just wow. What a film and what a man!

Day 104: It was gone 1:30pm when I got up feeling the worse for wear. A chilli, chorizo and cheese omelette really sorted me out but no beer tonight. How my Saturday frame of mind has changed from just a few years ago. Elliot and Camilla dropped off a jar of japaenos (that Mil had WhatsApp’d me about) and, among other things, we chatted about a photo Tracie Garrett circulated featuring Ell, me her and a few others who met up to have a drink at The Haycock for Ron Gambling. In it was Cath and someone called Ross (who I don’t remember) who have both passed since the pic (July ‘99). I feel strangely saddened by it all. The pic itself is such a reminder of days past - it conjours up shit loads of different feelings.

Day 105: A few beers again last night so another late one (5ish) but up before noon. Finished watching a series called Condor. Pretty good - bit of a messy ending that is the norm with telly nowadays in that it is a little bit of a cliffhanger.

Day 106: The Ship reopened today. I left a nice message on the Virtual Pub group page wishing them the best plus said thanks to Rach. I think it will be the end of the laugh we’ve had on the virtual site now. I expect to go through a bit of a miserabel time with people now venturing out down the pubs.We were once all united in lockdown - that will no longer be the case. Met Rog for a walk - did over 7km oncluding through Barnwell Picnic Park - I don’t remember it being that pretty. defo going to go there again. Got an email from RCI asking for all furlough workers to join a Zoom meeting tomorrow with Paul (MD) and Deryn (HR). Ominous! Went shopping in Asda and Farm Foods. £100 with NO BOOZE!

Day 107: The zoom call today didn’t tell me much other than we are being furloughed still, until further notice. It was susggested that we have a zoom meeting every 2 weeks and that RCI recognise we’ve be left out in the cold somewhat. I appreciate that very much.There were 30 of us on the call plus Paul and Deryn were in the office since they had to make peopel redundant today. Mark was in the office earlier to take receivership of the IT kits from those that left.

Day 108: I am well on the way to doing 1,000,000 steps in theree months (July, August & September) but at what cost. I’ve done well over 11,000 steps each day in July (actually, a lot of days in June as well) apart from one (8k) and I am feeling it. My right leg/ankle is sore! Day 109: I had another mention by Chris Hawkins on Radio 6. He asked for Brian May moments - apparently when he met Brian May he was so starstruck that all he could say was ‘thank you for the music’. I tweeted my story of telling Felicity Kendall to have a good life. Today, both my walks have resulted in me getting fucking soaked. Hanna S2 is on Amazon Prime. Time for yet another free trial (number 4 or 5).

Day 110: I have walked 144,448 steps in 10 days, well on the way to a million steps in three months. The Heist of the Century - an Argentinian film based on true events - watched it last night (well, over two nights, actually). A real life Ocean’s Eleven (but with 6). Brilliant film, brilliat story. I had issues signing up to another Amazon Prime free trial last night so I set up another gmail a/c just now and I think I’m in. I used Danny’s Gmail (which I created over 15 years ago!) and it didn’t like it - I think I must have used it before. I reckon I have probably had loads more free trials than I care to remember. Anyway, off to watch me some Hanna!

Day 111: Very tired as I type. Bed at around 5am, up at 13:30, normal exercises, cleaning kitchen cupbaords and I’m done in. It’s 10:30pm now, just cracked open a beer and about to watch a new Netflix film “The Old Guard”. I would continue with Hanna but Amazon Prime keeps fucking erroring. I will try to go to bed before it gets light (which seems to be my w/e norm nowadays!

Day 112: I have got into the habit of eating dinner far too late. It’s 10:30pm as I type and I am just about to have something eat. I’m not sure why I feel it’s wrong to eat so late but I do, I shall be trying to address it. Late night again last night (gone 4:30am) so today was a lazy day. Only on ewalk but it was 10km and I get up the above 11,000 steps needed for the 1m challenge. My stair climb, at around 9pm, fucking killed.

Day 113: Boring Monday.

Finished watching The Old Guard on Netflix. A Highlander-esque affair with Charlize Theron kicking ass like she did in Atomic Blonde. It was OK. Haven’t manage to lick the late night eating. It’s 10:05pm and tea’s still cooking.

Day 114: I have been looking at planning persmissions on the ENDC site for questions posed on the Oundle Chatter group on FB. There’s going to be two sites with 130 new houses on each and it’s causing concern. And so it should - the planning docs are very revealing. Objections are dismissed in such an off-hand way. It’s really quite insulting. I was awfully down today, during my first walk. I mean, really despondant (too difficult to describe here), which is a lower version of the norm - it’s been a good couple of weeks since anyone’s even asked how I am! A week since that post on my main blog. But, I powered through and am back to the usual depth! I ate at @9:30 pm tonight. Told ya!

Day 115: I am typing this on Day 116 - I ended up hainga  couple of beers last night and forgot to post. I had the most ridiculous toing and froing on FB and Messenger with Rachel (Harris) - it was piss funny. She is the first person in days, actually weeks, who has asked how I am! I watched ep3 of Hanna S2. Absolutely superb. She kills Marissa! Did not see that fucker coming...mind blown! Day 116: I have finally finished the thorough clean of the kitchen. Fucking drama. I am typing at just gone 10pm, about to eat (curry I made yesterday). It’s been a strange day, timings wise, last night’s drinking meant I wasn’t up until just gone noon which obviously didn’t help. I had a call from DSM group - I applied for an IT tech role, they want to see me tomorrow (Friday) for an interview (in Sibson). Interesting! (Although the contact, Helen, hasn’t sent the promised email!)

Day 117: Despite not getting a confirmation email, I attended the interview at DSM. It went OK (I was there for 90 mins). I went booze shopping in Tesco’s afterwards. Spoke to dad today also - he and Rita are well, as usual! I am feeling really knackered and achy today. I do hope it’s not anything to worry about.

Day 118: Up at 1pm. 9.79 km walk. Cooking meatballs, drinking beer, listening to The Blaze about to watch Deepwater Horizon. All good today!

Day 119: Similar to yesterday, up late, bloody long walk, watching Saving Private Ryan (which I started last night).

Day 120: Typing on day 121. Received an email from someone that works at the BBC for Shaun Keaveny’s show - they want me to do small claims court on August 5th. I’m becoming obsessed with getting my steps in - my second walk was extended to round Barnwell Country Park - over 17.5k steps - not the most I’ve done in one day but, for example, most in one day last month (June) was 14.7k. More importantly, I am finding that I can walk further (and for longer) and not have a hypo; not a great deal further, but over an hour.

[bunny-banana]

For the director's cut thing, the story where Fabri asks Ermal out on a date but Ermal doesn't realize that? 👀

YO SO WE GONNA DO THAT OR WHAT

Its this fic btw if anyones curious.  

Chap 1

Even with closed eyes, he sensed the man lying next to him turn towards him but Fabrizio did not spoke immediately. No, he just stayed silent for a bit, Ermal wasn’t quite sure what he was observing but before Ermal could ask, Fabrizio broke the silence.

its u. he’s gazing at u, u idiot.

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’You didn’t exactly give off the vibe that you’d say yes’

“What the fuck does that even mean? I don’t give off the vibe?!”

mr no-homo meta has NO right to be surprised at that. boy went into a panic attack every time someone as much as breathed the suggestion ofc fab was Anxious

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A certain Roman showing up at his doorstep looking like he’d belong to the Milan Fashion Week.A tight grey shirt whose top three buttons almost begged to be opened (yet remained miraculously, in Fabris case, closed!) clung nicely to the body underneath it. A very fine silver chain hung around his neck that perfectly fit with the rings and the watch on his hand.Instead of ripped denim, now tight & shiny dark jeans were worn and to round this look up, an impeccably tailored black, suit jacket was thrown over him.

so not to be Hoe on main but we all just love Sexy Fab.  but more so, i really thought Fabrizio would have put a lot of effort into dressing nicely this time around. Probably called a few friends, crying to help him. He just wanted Ermal to like his look. Which he did.   A lot.  again, outstanding heterosexual of the year, ermal meta is completely mesmerised by that look.

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“Well, well, Fab. Gotta say, this place is on a whole different level“ The curly haired man commented as he flipped through the menu.“You like it?”“How could I not?”

again, Fabrizio intentionally looking up a fancy place for their Date, something he actually felt a little bit uncomfortable about himself and wouldnt normally chose for himself. But then again, he was greatly relieved when Ermal actually did say he liked it.

*

*It felt.. nice. The whole evening was quite nice, Ermal had to admit, even with the unusual ambient.

Ermal is just honestly iconic in this fic. man enjoys fabrizios appearance, enjoys talking with him,  eating out with him, just spending time with him in general sooo much……and yet.

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Fabrizio tilted his head and was it the candle light or something else, but a intriguing shine filled his eyes.“I’d know something sweeter than this.” In the next moment, everything turned upside down when Fabrizio suddenly took his hand and intertwined their fingers, his thumb gently brushing over the back of the younger man’s hand.

THE COURAGE THIS TOOK. THE NERVES WHICH WERE WRECKED.  Fab really just went “ok here we go balls to the wall now or never”

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Chap2

“So, Fabrizio….Fabrizio likes me. Apparently.” It felt interesting to say it out loud. Ermal got a tingly feeling at the thought. So ..it was him who made Fabrizio blush earlier? Who made him nervous? And smiley?  Christ, he actually really wanted Ermal to like his outfit, didn’t he? A small smirk found its way on Ermal’s face. Who would have thought that he’d have Fabrizio Moro of all people wrapped around his finger.

erm: so im het

also erm: wow i really really like the fact that fabrizio is into me. its actually super exciting. kinda makes me happy in a way.

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“Wait, what?! I should ask him out?!”“Yeah? Isn’t that something you want?”Is that something he- But that would imply that he’d want to pursue Fabrizio, his very male, masculine, manly friend Fabrizio who was definitely not by any chance a woman. To have a relationship with guy that was …..romantic… and oh sweet Mother of God, sexual?!“I- I- I don’t know.”

so yeah, to get to the bottom of this, when you’re in the process of realising your own …..non-heterosexuality, its just A Lot to take in.  I thought, realistically, that would just be a bit too much for Ermal to take in at that moment. He had to process the mere thought of “yes, you could have a romantic relationship with this guy, since he’s into you. Its absolutely a possibility”. When you’re conditioned to think “i can only ever date people of the opposite sex” all your life, it takes a bit of time to get accustomed to new possibilities.

And then theres the sexual aspect which is like, on Jupiter, for Ermal’s current state of mind.

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Chap3

The video he currently was immersed in showed a slow-mo fight between a mongoose and a cobra that in all its intensity outdid any action movie in a heartbeat.

i remember watching that vid before writing that chapter and being mesmerised by it. u fucking go lil mongoose!

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[Bizio]: sorry i cant this weekend

First, i just love the thought of him being saved as Bizio on Ermals phone. Second, the reason why he replied so late was because he was wrecking his mind about it. Should he go? should he not? god, the thought of seeing ermal excited him and yet scared him. nonononno. he’s trying to get Over Ermal. He needs space. he is not ready yet.

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[Ermal]:Fabri!! Heard you’re coming up North! 😁 I have this excellent bottle of wine that a fan gave me the other day (don’t ask) so how about we open it at my place? I know you love a good wine 😉🍷

He couldn’t even slide the phone back into his pocket before it started buzzing. Surprisingly, the reply came almost instantly this time.[Bizio]:sorry no the schedule is pretty tight for me at the moment i dont think ill have much time in milan

i just image him getting the weirdest fucking fan gifts. also lmao the lightning speed with which fab replied. homeboy saw that wine would be involved and imemdiately thought “nononononono. worst case, my drunk ass might kiss him, god forbid. we are absolutely not gonna do that”

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[Ermal]:So I’m flipping through the channels at home and there comes a baking show and I wouldn’t normally stop to watch but you know what they’re baking? Those creamy pastry things we had in Lisbon!

Now the idea about the Pasteis de Nata stemms from a real life event! During ESC 2018 i slept at a friends house and since the contest was held in Portugal we decided to cook something portuguese. Thats what we did. They fucking slap. Also, one of the best weekends ive ever had

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However, this is how things continued as to all of Ermal’s messages, he’d receive rather uncharacteristically short replies. When he sent him photos he’d often not reply at all and even when he called Fabri didn’t pick.

Okay we have to image in WHAT kinda mental state Fabrizio is in that time. Boy is EMBARASSED to death. Then obviously, he is trying his hardest to get rid of this crush.  So he just isnt talking to Ermal at all. Which in turn makes him lonely and sad.  So then Ermal shoots him a message, sends him a picture and Fabrizio is immediately head over heels again. Which he shouldnt be. Bad Fabri. And the circle repeats itself.

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Fabrizio who smiled sweetly at the host, who hugged her tightly, who joked with her and oh, whose eyes didn’t stick to her face but wandered more and more south.

Dude honestly, Fab was not flirting with anyone. He was just being nice as he usually is. And we all know he a lil bit sleazy so yeah, he might have looked down once or twice. but he really was not flirting. It was just Ermals affection-deprived mind going berserk.

Also that was the first time Ermal witnessed Fabrizio being affectionate with someone else. And the contrast to that cold shoulder he received was just the last straw for him.

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“Why is he all smiley and lovey-dovey with her while he treats me as if I’m a war criminal?!” Ermal shouted the second the other line got picked up.“Uhm, hello? Maybe a ‘Good morning’ first of all? A simple ‘how are you doing, Sabina?’ would have been appreciated too.”

Damn bitch can ya greet ur sister first before going off smh

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And would it have been really that bad if Ermal had just held on to his hand? Let Fabrizio gently stroke him with his thumb, maybe even squeeze back while Ermal’s finger draws circles over letters that covered the older man’s knuckles.It would have been nice and Ermal would have liked it.

I think he just needed to see what he was missing out to realise what he really has always wanted. If things were to go back to normal, he would have never made any realisations.

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“Am I- Do I like Fabrizio?”

No, we dont ask what he is. Because thats for another time, a calmer time. Or maybe not at all. He doesnt know the answer to that question and its not important right now. All he knows is that despite it all, he likes Fabrizio.

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The fact he was a guy was new, but those feelings involved weren’t.

I feel like this is just a very bisexual experience. At least to me it was. Its very confusing when u are genuinely attracted to the opposite sex, so you make the conclusion: you are obviously straight. Its not possibly that you are not-straight.  

Then u start feeling attraction to someone of ur own gender and its like “hmmm. Obviously this must be fake since we have established that Im genuinely attracted to the opposite sex ”

But the thing is..it aint going away. And then u think how you’d perhaps be down for sex, and perhaps be down for something more, and perhaps do all those nice things you would be doing with someone of the opposite sex.  

So yeah, its ..its really confusing and complicated to figure it out. And if you actually do have a feelings for someone it only makes matters more complicated ig

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“Jesus, I really do like him. Me. Liking a guy.”

Again, once u made That Realisation, its just the WILDEST thing in the beginning. a complete NEW concept being applied to yourself.

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“LISTEN CUT THE BULLSHIT I KNOW EXACTLY THAT YOU’RE HOME! OPEN UP OR I WILL STAND HERE ALL NIGHT I’M NOT FUCKING AROUND!” In addition to the knocking he now also started ringing the doorbell. He sure as hell wouldn’t move here until that door wasn’t opened.“I DONT GIVE A FUCK, I WON’T EVEN SLEEP AND NEITHER WILL YOU. I CAN GO ON FOREVER YOU HEAR ME, FABRIZIO MOBRICI?!”

Ermal is just unhinged in all my fics.

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Epilogue

[Ermal💛]: You ready?

Fabrizio added that heart right immediately after Ermal left his house a week prior.

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Ermal looked….cuddly.

So yeah we all know Fab isnt the keenest on fashion and shit. And i just though Ermal would want him to be as comfortable as possible on their date, so he was like “ay come casual” . and also, its sort of cute that Ermal lets Fabri see him so casual too, its sort of more private in that sense.

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And those were still the mild surprises, let’s not start with the downright shock he felt when his brain started providing words like kissable, attractive, sexy and hot during lonelier nights.

i have a fic for those kinda nights too

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“It’s not that far and God knows men your age need the exercise anyway.”

ermal just cant show affection like a normal person, he has to roast u even when he’s madly in love with u

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What followed behind the colourful door was a small chaos. Literally. People constantly coming and going, with buzzing voices chatting in every corner. They made their way half through the rather crowded establishment, got greeted by a waiter who rushed past them, before they finally spotted a couple leaving, liberating two chairs for them.

SO YEAH. the restaurant. it is loosely based on a place here in Vienna. Its pakistani food too, its a buffet, its kinda chaotic like described in the fic. also u can pay as much as u want.

i just thought, yknow, its home made cooking and its kinda relaxed and chill and casual and has a certain liberal flair to it. and i thought yeah that has fabri energy we gonna use that. also their mango rice puddings fucking slap

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Languages were not his forte, those belonged to Ermal, but Fabrizio ran through his options. It surely wasn’t French or Spanish, that he would at least recognise. German looked different too; they had those dots over their U’s and those curly B’s which allegedly weren’t B’s at all. Swedish? Danish? No. He’s been to Ikea often enough to know that his wardrobe wouldn’t be called Qershor. And Russian had different letters but maybe it was something similar to Russian?

Okay, so I’m a known Slut for Languages.  Fabrizio is not. I can pretty much recognise most European languages in written form at some point in a text. Fabrizio can not. Therefore writing this from the perspective of someone who really isnt into languages was kind of interesting and a bit challenging. I was just thinking ‘how would he recognise them when he isnt into them?’  And i think, in the end, i did it realistically.

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“Is it like..Serbian? Croatian? Or something?” He mumbled while putting a piece of eggplant in his mouth but quickly realised the answer when Ermal almost spit out his water from laughing.“No, definitely not. I can guarantee you, it’s very much not Serbian or Croatian ‘or something’.” Ermal chuckled with a bright smile, obviously enjoying their little guessing game. “But you’re close. In a way.”

This is SO embarrassing but this whole language guessing game was just a setup to an inside joke I have with myself.  So, for those who don’t know, I speak Serbo-Croatian. And I study Slavic studies. The first things they tell you in the first lesson of the Slavic Linguistics course is “Please, for the love of God, PLEASE, dont say Albanian/Hungarian/Romanian is a slavic language”. Apparently many europeans assume these languages are because theyre surrounded by slavic countries. BUT TO AN ACTUAL SLAVIC NATIVE SPEAKER, the difference is immediately obvious and so its quite comical when people assume theyre related languages.   So i thought the reverse would be kinda funny to Ermal too.

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“I can be anything the teacher wants me to be. A good student, a naughty student, whatever floats his boat…” He asked sultrily before winking at the man across of him whose higher brain functions seemed to have ceased at once and just gaped at him like a fish.

boys whole brain got fried when the sexiest man in italy started flirting with him. issokay, he was just shocked. fabrizio has never been flirty with him before, he’ll get used to it.

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“I was just trying to give you the best date that I could.“At those words, the Roman frowned however."Wait, this was a date?!”

im just an asshole honestly

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They giggled as they finally closed the gap between them going for a slow and deep kiss.

i just love them being all SOFT and in LOVE

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“Erm, I- I have an instore tomorrow, I better be well rested.”His counterpart just huffed and raised an eyebrow.“So were you planning on staying up all night, huh?”

Fabs horn dog brain definitively went HmmmmMmm this is nice:) ..could get even nicer:)  but no fuck, i have work to do tomorrow

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“Love how you immediately forget about a good night’s sleep once you have a tongue in your mouth.”“Fuck off.”

He just got carried away as if u were complaining ermal smh

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"I bet on everything I have that your password is 'liberoanita1’ so yes, I actually can.”

Parents culture is just using ur children’s names as all your passwords and we all know Fabri is that kinda parent.

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All in All, i also wanna talk about how the epilogue mirrors the first chapter, but in a more successful light.

Fabrizio dresses for Ermal - Ermal dresses for Fabrizio

fancy place - more casual place

They take the car - they walk

Fabrizio takes Ermals hand on the open for everyone to see - Ermal takes Fabrizios hand under the table, in private

They eat their dessert seperately - they eat theri dessert together

they fall out - they become closer, kiss

they dont talk - they plan the next date

anyway thanks for reading and thank uuuuuu for this ask julchen

[purpleful]

Meet the creator (tag game)

I was tagged by @littlemeowmeowschimmy, thank u for tagging me ( or being your victim i guess 😂 )

Part 1 - All about BTS 

Question 1: What is the meaning behind your username? 

Well, my first username was snowflakeu25, dunno how dunno why, i just like number 25 and i was born in winter, and it always amazed me how snowflakes are formed so beautiful and unique.. okay but for this username, Jungkooks euphoria no matter now many times i watch it it always makes me wanna cry so yeah

Question 2: What got you into BTS and why? 

Well, actually my friend, but was constantly refusing, bc im not into popular music stuffs people no, i avoid them lol until something change my mind. It was reaction on kpop on fbe, youtubers were reacting. And there ive heard bts song and i saw positive reactions and i was like, that wasnt bad, so i texted my friend to send me like couple more songs and that. And here i am

Question 3: Explain why you like your bias 

I love Jungkook. My heart skips a beat when he smiles. He is my inspiration. He was a kid when he started training, away from family, surrounded by boys older then him, but still he stayed strong and didnt give up. Now hes a man of many talentens that always does his best. And also it always moves me the way he cares for his hyungs, how he tries his best to make them laugh, the way he loves them. Hes just amazing in every way.

Question 4: Who are your bias wreckers? Has any of them come close to becoming your bias? 

I dont really have a bias wrecker. I love them all. Tho like Jungkook somehow has my heart, i cant really decide for bias wrecker. Choosing bias was hard enough

Question 5: Do you have any particular ships you enjoy? 

Jikook. I saw how happy they are together. Its impossible not to see that. Other then them, namjin are like parents ship so they are funny to watch

Question 6: Favorite Run BTS episode

I dunno the number of it, but the one when they like had to jump to take a photo, and they had to do various face expressions. They laughed so much, so did i 😂

Question 7: All-time favorite BTS song (and if you don’t have one list top 3) 

Run, Seesaw and Heartbeat

Question 8: All-time favorite non BTS released song (Can be from a mix-tape, single, cover, etc) Again, if you don’t one list three or two

Well theres a video of Jungkook singing Dear no one, its from Taes vlive. And its like one minute long. But still i cried when i heard it. Angelic voice, that touches peoples hearts indeen.

Part 2 - Rapid-fire about you 

Question 1: Favorite color 

Purple, blue and yellow but that yellow between yellow and orange like this heart 💛

Question 2: Favorite animal

I dont really have favourite animal, i have few golden fishes tho

Question 3: What types of music do you listen to outside of BTS?

Well its hard to define my music by the genre. I like songs from kdramas, but also i like Chase Atlantic that are like the total opposite?

Question 4: Can you tell a story about one of your most recent scars? 

I dont have any scar on my body

Question 5: What is one of your biggest pet peeves?

When people want to look at my drawings by a force. Or when i show them and they just see only my mistakes, like okay i see them too thank u, but i would like some encouraging words also

Question 6: What kind of hobbies do you have? 

I draw, i sometimes make origami, or do origami i dunno how its correct. Im learning a bit of Korean here and there if that can fit in hobbies.

Question 7: What do you hate most in this world? 

Wars. Politics. People that has to do with them.

Question 8: Finally, why writing? (In my case, why drawing i guess?)

Well, I finally can accept and say that, thats my talent. Thats what i am good at. Still its unbelievable when i can like raise my arm in class when prof asks who can draw and when my friends count me as one of the artists in the class as well. I still doubt my skills but i hope as time goes by ill learn to trust them. I wasnt always good artist. Or maybe just there were people that were better then me. So i never thought that im good at it. But i started again because of bts, and im am so thankful. Anyway I hope ill improve my drawing skills, and that people will love my drawings ☺️

I tag: @50shadesofpurples @i-am-today-we-will-survive @dimpled-gukkie @temptaestions @la-vie-en-tae @kindalinehydlon + everyone who want to do this, tag me i would love to see your answers ☺️ (btw sorry if some answers dont make sense or i made a mistake, its 3am 😅)