#theres more details i didnt add too

[bulbabutt]

okay. lets bite the bullet and talk about 2012. lets talk about child abuse, familial abuse, generational abuse, toxic family units, whatever you wanna call it. lets talk about it and whether it exists in this show. i actually encourage you to read this no matter what your take is, just to hear it out. let me be FUCKING clear: i love this show, but i get scared to talk about it seriously. everyone on every side is defensive all the time but i love every turtles show to no end.

this post is going to go over so well and not controversially at all.

precursor: every splinter is some level of shitty dad. he always has been. the fucking bare bones of the character is that he raised his children to kill the man who killed his own father. thats inherently fucked up. every splinter has some level of fucked up about him. maybe hes inattentive, or neglectful, or strict, or secretive, maybe hes just not very good at dealing with his kids. splinter is supposed to be far from perfect. thats what makes him splinter. maybe he grows over the course of a series, maybe he doesnt. maybe hes supposed to be shitty his whole life, maybe hes not. thats just splinter. each is adapted differently depending on the story being told.

and 2012 has a very interesting tone to its story.

lets start at the beginning, back in japan. this is season 3, was this story what they intended when they started writing the show back in season 1? probably not, theres probably things they would have written differently had they known this was where splinter's story started. thats kind of the way tv works, you add the details later. but for our sake of analyzing the character of splinter as a whole, it seems best to start here as if its all intentional.

hamato yoshi is a member of the hamato clan. theyre a very traditional old ninja clan in the modern world, they have old feuds and theyre trying to keep their culture alive. they're literally the last of a clan of ninjas like this, having (supposedly) defeated the foot clan (their generational enemies) back when yoshi was a baby. hes set out to lead next, and its very important to him. and yet hes married to a woman who works in the city, a modern woman who doesnt live the life he does. she even moved to be with him. i feel the need to compare this to how men in the real world who want traditional wives never go for women who are willing to be their housewives, always try to break down the independent ones. splinter seems unconcerned with how his wife wants to live. with how she wants their daughter to be raised.

im not necessarily saying this is how this comes off in the show, but i find it interesting to think about. this is absolutely the most rounded version of tang shen as a character (thus far) it stops her being just a name on a page "hamato yoshi's love and the object of his enemies affections who died" and turns her into a woman who has a stake in the story. gives her more agency.

its very interesting that this show implies an actual relationship between tang shen and oroku saki, albeit a one-sided one that didnt work out, but they do seem to have parted on equal ground. the pair of them discuss yoshi's inattentive duties as a husband and father, that he's too obsessed with the tradition and lineage of his clan. honestly, if this woman just took her baby and left no one would blame her! he has his priorities set, and it leaves no room for her and their newborn baby. if she ran away with saki at this point, the story would make just as much sense.

but then disaster strikes, saki learns the truth about his family, that he was actually a child of the foot clan (honestly i wish we saw this play out instead of jumping ahead in the story but thats not what this post is about) and he kills he and yoshi's father. revenge for him having killed his. cycles of abuse and revenge that never end. the pair of them were raised in this society that values lineage like this, that would kill for it. its no wonder they both grew up this way.

anyway, tang shen is killed by a blow meant for yoshi, and saki takes their child and raises her. based on splinter's lack of desire to be a father so far in the story, its honestly not one you can blame him for. its fucked up, but it makes sense. saki does to miwa exactly what his father did to him. cycles of abuse and revenge.

yoshi loses everything, and moves to america. he's turned into splinter the mutant rat, and gains four turtle sons.

so as established, he's not exactly grown up with a stable family life. he obviously, while human, wasnt acting as a stable father for the child he intended to have. so how good is he at this?

ive talked before about how the 2003 show treats the turtles as kind of one whole unit. they don't have individual relationship arcs, they dont have overarching storylines where they grow apart or closer, they're always in each other's corner.

2012 makes this more dynamic. here we see that 15 years seeing no one but each other, growing under this splinter has come with its own quirks. these brothers dont understand each other that well. they get jealous of each others treatment, some are left out, some are misunderstood. raph resents leo, none of them appreciate what donnie does, mikey bothers everyone else for attention, etc. it creates a really good starting place for this show.

(the issue i have with this show is more that they never really open or close any of these beats, at least not in ways that last. but boy does it make for some good dramatic scenes)

we see over the course of this first season that splinter treats his children just as he was, as little ninjas more so than sons. he raises them to follow his traditions, the ones tang shen never cared for. but this is all he knows how to be! you cant really blame him.

most people bring up mikey as the quintessential example when they talk about this, i dont want to do that cuz i know you've all heard it. while i think his father does disrespect him and i think it is paid forward and his brothers do too, i'd rather talk about raph for a change.

in one episode, raph loses his temper. to teach him a lesson, splinter makes his brothers pelt him in training while insulting him any way they can, and tells him to just... not lose his temper. this is a terrible lesson in general. instead of trying to coax out why he might be angry, it just plays up that if he loses his temper bad things happen.

splinter in this episode basically encourages bullying. this comes up a lot when it comes to raph. to compare, in 2003 when raph loses his temper, hes told to blow off steam which he does. his brothers don't blame him for having emotional outbursts, they know thats just how he is so they know how he needs to cope with it. he's given the physical space to let it out.

im not saying this show needs to be like that show, im just saying thats a version of this story where the outcome is better for raph as a whole. since this outcome is not as good for him emotionally, you can tell why he's still got these emotional issues. splinter never helps him more than that. thats more why this raph differs from that one, if that makes sense. one has his family in his corner more than the other.

speaking of. raph has a pet turtle. this turtle is the only one he can talk to about how he feels. why might that be? it's the only thing hes kind and gentle to, and he refuses to let his brothers make him feel weak for being kind to it. where did he learn to be ashamed of being kind and gentle? thats a learned behaviour. in a house full of other men... yeah, that would happen. but whos values start that?

when this turtle gets some mutagen spilled on it, it tries to get revenge on his family. there is such a resentment going on here, its extremely juicy. the show chalks this up to "post mutation insanity", but its just as easy to think that everything raph has experienced has made him seem angry and resentful and perhaps scared to his pet, and that former pet wants raph to himself so they can be free. the frustrated venting of a child complaining about how no one understands him in such a big way turns slash into a vengeful monster, cuz thats all he's ever heard. it makes sense, he went from a little turtle to a fully cognizant adult aged being in an instant. emotionally no one would handle that well, and definitely not someone whos only ever heard the worst about people.

he comes around later. notably by being on his own, away from the hamatos.

again, im not saying the show is writing this intentionally, but i think tonally its in the zone where you could see this analysis as being canon. that these little pieces of narrative fit the worldview of a toxic family unit that isnt dealing with its problems in a healthy way.

there's other small aspects. leo slaps mikey early on, having seen it on his favourite show be used as a way of getting someone to calm down. mikey questions this behaviour, leo seems to feel bad about it when questioned. if we know that that behaviour was bad, what other things might he emulate in a similar way?

there's things like donnie's predatory behaviour towards april. in a world where all they ever knew was splinter's stories of the outside world (and perhaps television from decades earlier), hearing splinter's story of his love for tang shen, his rivalry with his own brother over her, you could actually see why he would behave the way he does, why he claims her the way he does. not as an excuse, but as a reason he learned the behaviour. and there's multiple opportunities for his father to tell him off. he never does. why would he? he knows no better.

this splinter, unlike every other, is not old or disabled. he doesnt require a cane (at the start, but also was never a good cane) and its interesting that despite being like... a 40 year old man in the peak of his life he does not accompany his sons on missions. he sits around doing nothing and disproves of his sons heroic actions. april literally calls him out for this at one point. the show is actually telling us some of this man's behaviour is wrong.

one of the more upsetting things that happens in this household is a lot of physical hitting. "theyre training" you might say. understandable. but when you see a lot of hitting come from the father in this show, played for a laugh, when you see splinter play the "drunk master" bit it makes you think. is that okay? isnt that a bit much?

the end of the muckman episode is a freeze frame of splinter (after having knocked out all of his sons to punish them for leaving while grounded) turning his anger on april and her running away. idk thats just not funny to me. this is a bit of the dating of the show, 2012 was a time where character's in shows were meaner, less affectionate, more bullying in nature. that was the sense of humour at the time. that isnt me making a judgment, it's just kind of the era. a pre steven universe world, if that makes sense. so many of the jokes that end in a hit aren't funny in 2024. especially not when they come from a parent.

when this splinter speaks about his kids to their brothers he often ends up insulting them. "you should be like mikey, he never overthinks because he doesn't think", this would be a big reason the boys speak about each other the way they do to their faces. puts forward a bit more of that bullying thing i mentioned earlier. if their own father talks about them like this, of course their brothers do too. so of course they join in and give payback.

again. splinter wasnt raised in a normal family. he was raised in a ninja commune with a bunch of murderers. he wasn't great with his wife and baby daughter. its not surprising that he's bad at this.

so, ive just said a bunch of things about what's wrong with this household as a whole. i think ive explained why the family unit behaves the way it does: generational teachings of feuds and traditional values. i dont think this makes the show bad! i, in fact, wish there was more of it. i think theres so much low hanging fruit that the show kind of wants to play with, but cant fully bring itself to.

specific example: during the space arc on a planet thats driving all the characters emotions against each other we get this amazing scene where raph screams at leo for being splinter's favourite. leo responds by hugging him. its really well done!

however its never brought up again, never actually getting into the nitty gritty of why raph feels like that is exactly what i think makes this show resonate with so many people

its dark! it pulls at your heart strings! it makes people feel seen! we go in mikey's head at one point and see such splintered (lol) personalities in his head. he has a huge anger problem (much like raph) in there. he retreats into imagination land when stressed. the show kind of toys with "these kids are fucked up!" but never lets those character moments go anywhere. i love how fucked up this family is. its so complex, it feels real. at least real to me. i wish it went that little step further and let the characters talk about these things a little more.

maybe you have a different experience, and thats fine! but i wouldnt brush off people like me who look at 2012 and say "these dynamics make me uncomfortable". to excuse it by saying "my family is like that and we're fine" sometimes i just wanna say... <:/ are you? have you talked about that? and if that's your read on it is that its fine, thats great. but some people notice patterns and those patterns can make them uncomfortable. i hope ive explained the patterns here.

i think thats why the fandom is as big as it is. this show would lead to the most amazing deep introspective fan-works youve ever seen, it lays the pieces out so perfectly for you to draw your own conclusions about why they are this way. you cant really blame people for talking about it as if its got a way higher rating than it does. it feels like it does.

i should say, i dont even know if i blame the show on its own for leaving those pieces laying there, it was on nickelodeon. i sense studio meddling in the tone. i mean, given that the show wanted to end with the big mutant apocalypse storyline, and yet the network wanted to end it with the big 87 crossover..... yeah i think its safe to say nick would rather they keep it light.

which is funny, because i think the most controversial thing i can say is i personally love the finale arc as the mutant apocalypse. it so encapsulates my favorite part of this show. to end this show in the darkest timeline and say "even though these characters are so far removed from who they used to be and even though the entire world is over they still have each other in the end" and i find that so perfect.

so. i understand that this is always a touchy topic. i know people want to brush it off as "people say the 12 brothers are abusive to mikey but mikey is fine", and i think thats a really skewed version of it from both sides. first of all. mikey is not fine, look in that boys head. look how he copes. he's not. but also, mikey is not the only victim. they all are. these turtles are victims of their upbringing, victims of generational war. of men who didnt know how to be good fathers in the first place. and thats good writing! it feels deep! it connects!

for more context: any fucked up way you can think of karai being raised by shredder? its probably the same way here. splinter and shredder were raised the same way.

i guess i think about this a lot, cuz i always see things like "oh, rise fans write crossovers where the rise boys love each other and have to teach the 12 boys how to be nice cuz they dont like 2012!" and i just think to myself:

guys. do you understand why a person might do that? why would someone (likely a teenager) want 2012 mikey to be treated nicely by a kinder more openly affectionate version of his own family? do i need to spell that out for you? why do we connect with media at all, why do we write our own stories about it?

if you genuinely dont. i mean, im glad for you. but sometimes you wanna imagine a world in which your own family is more openly affectionate with you. where they hug and tell you theyre proud and love you and you never have to question it, never have to look elsewhere for that kind of approval. its less that they're idolizing rise, and more that they're looking at the two families and saying "this one is emotionally mature and in touch with their feelings more than that one. how would that play out?"

doctor feelings ass response.

look, im not saying everyone understands 2012, that everyone likes or needs to like it. im just trying to say that i think these fucked up parts of 2012 are all around my favourite parts of the show. its an inspiring story about this fucked up little family that has no one but each other, and they're not great about it. they try, but they don't always get it right. i just wish the show would have talked about that part more. but i think that since it doesnt people get to fill in those blanks themselves, and they do it so beautifully. and i really wish people on the internet would be more kind to one another when they wanted to discuss these darker themes they find in it.

these are the reasons i love this show. i think its so very interesting that splinter dies this fucked up father figure who never really apologized for his behaviour. i like that raph needs to be held to stop punching his brothers. that leo doesnt have a good grip on what it is to be a leader, that he tries bad ways of doing it. i like that no one copes well! i like that their relationships are so complex! this show is messy! its good! i wish it was more messy!

and id love if we could be more honest about these things and how they make us feel instead of just brushing each other off as "likes the show" or "doesnt like the show". the things that make me uncomfortable are why i love this show and i'm pretty sure i'm not alone there.

[ganondoodle]

was watching another totk video and through that found out what the reward is for completing koltins quests, honestly im not really surprised but also baffled and it really just shows, once again, that totk kinda does exactly what you shouldnt do in a sequel imo.. double down on all the bad stuff of the previous title

at this point i have talked about various problems in detail but i just keep realizing over and over just how much of the wrong lesson they seemed to take from botw, they recycled almost everything from botw by changing some paint or some words, made a giant game even bigger and filled it with boring and tedious busy work that has mediocre to insulting rewards EVEN MORE than botw

game too big and empty? make it TWICE as big, change barely anything about the map of the previous title and the new added map(s) is ONE biom that almost everywhere looks the same and even emptier with little to do

too many krogs? MAKE IT MORE and double down on the literally shit reward bc its the SAME just with one more stack of shit

too many shrines with short puzzles? ADD EVEN MORE and make them even shorter and easier to complete, alot of them not even involving a puzzle and multiple being an utterly out of place tutorial that could have been explained to you in a single text box

rewards in the overworld being mostly either a krog or a shrine which gets repetetive with shrines being ALOT and krogs being wayyy too many? add even MORE shrines and EVEN MORE krogs, but now add over a hundred of caves to it that all get repetetive after just a few of them and you only do them for a shrine or a currency you have to collect to get one cool looking but pretty bad to use armor set and a piece of cloth for your parasail that you can only use one of at the tiem and to switch have to go back to a specific NPC, theres ghost lights to collect which only serve to yet again buy one armor set from a set of NPCs and ar meaningless afterwards, the light roots dont require you to do anything but walk to them and the reward for finding them all is a "you did it" sticker that doesnt even stick (its useless)

weapons break too quickly? well make the weapons you can find even worse to force you to fuse a material to it so its at all usable BUT IT STILL BREAKS and when it does it breaks not JUST the weapon but ALSO a material, materials that you will need for now EVEN MORE EXPENSIVE armor upgrades too, weapons cannot be rewards anymore either bc they will always have to be fused with something to make them stronger bc none is strong on its own- this also applies to THE MASTERSWORD, something ALSO complained about that it still 'breaks' even after empowering it through the DLC in botw, and now it cant even BE empowered (bc no DLC) unless you fuse soemthing to it (to. the. MASTERSWORD.) EVEN THO EMPOWERIGN THE MASTERSWORD IS THE ENTIRE POINT OF ZELDAS ULTIMATELY MEANING- AND CONSEQUENCELESS SACRIFICE !!

the dungeons were to samey and simple? make them look different but keep the core structure (activate terminals in completely seperate from each other "puzzles", fight boss) while also makign them be even more skippable (climable walls, the ceiling jump ability- something the titans DIDNT have) with incredibly easy bossfights that end with an embarassing copy and paste scene that hits you over the head with long known and obvious information over and over

people didnt like how the story was so detached from everything in the present? well, make the story and the present EVEN MORE detached from anything in the present, so far in fact that there is literally no connection to it aside from zelda who is the only connective thread and is also only treated as such (she is as personality lacking as sonia as soon as shes yoinked into the past) and the suddendly and out of nowhere intruduced architecture and history that wasnt a thing in botw but is treated like it was always there

people didnt like how far botw was detached from all other zelda games? ok totk is not only FURTHER detached from those it also completely detached itself from its on predecessor :)

people didnt like the memory system? ok make it WORSE then, its a linear story now that you can ruin by seeing even one out of order, they are super short and dont give you anymore context to anythign than the things you could figure out yourself or were already told really, instead of giving you views into a characters personality you get to view a basic plot summary of a story that is so flavorless and predictable i knew what would happen from the start yet acts like its being vague and cool that i felt like i was beign treated like a literal toddler

too few enemy types? well, we will reuse the old ones EVEN MORE thant before over twice the map and the new ones that are there are either utterlly irrelevant to change up the gameplay or largely feel like the old ones just with a paint job (constructs), the griocks looked cool at first but are just a more annyoing version of the lynels (who feel like an actual duel, akin to a proper boss)

even the things that were adressed, or attempted to, didnt fully work, like the bosses ARE more unique, but also still so incredibly easy and ALSO have multiple duplicats just sitting around in the underground despite them being supposedly the root of the problems of the regions (i like refighting bosses, but id rather have a character that lets me choose ok i wann fight this one again and teleporte me into a vision or sth- also the most fun fights arent even part of it (koga) )

the rain complaint got a new effect type to counteract it, which ... doesnt work well, you need specific materials to make potions with that effect which you also need to upgrade the only armor set wit hthat effect that ONLY works once you upgrade it (i think ... i dont know how high i got it but if even the full upgraded set doesnt negate the rain effect i will not be surprised either lol) also it adds just yet another effect type that spams your inventory and you dont really need .... or i might be the only one that saw no value at all in the "attack up when hot" new type of effects bc it felt so specific and situational while also having a way better option (just make it a standard attack up thing?) at least in my eyes-

... ill stop here .... this got longer again didnt it O-o

[itgomyway]

(you)r sp and you ♡

i have already made a post about how you should love yourself and your sp will love you almost as much (bc they actually are you!) but lets go into more detail

a lot of you guys, including me, wanted to get into a relationship. and with that, youve discovered the law of assumption. the basics start off with whatever you assume will be. but after months of arguing, harassment, and bullying on twitter, you’re probably confused and too scared to ask.

FUCK THAT. let me be the one to tell you that none of it matters. you very much can and WILL manifest your sp. others false opinions (false because theyre not real) mean nothing. this isnt a loass post though im talking about non dualism (which is not the same).

“but wait… i want my sp and non dualism isnt about getting so why would i-“ because your sp shouldnt be someone that brings you happiness. they should be someone who adds to your quality of life. why does that sound like loass vs non dualism? because it is.

people use the law of assumption to manifest desires for their physical world. theres nothing wrong with that! that is how i manifested my current relationship. however, when we speak about non dualism, it goes beyond trying to get anything. youre just being. and “getting” into a relationship can very much help or make your false sense of self feel better. you as consciousness know relationships themselves dont exist because it is you but your ego, the false sense of self doesnt know that. it wants to experience love as part of the human condition. but youre still not getting anything. lemme explain.

you were trying to “get” something that was never outside of you TO make you happy. that doesnt make sense when not only are they you, but they are apart of you. everything your awareness is on “reflects” how you feel about yourself because all there is is you.

lets go back to non dualism’s basics. everything is consciousness = you creation is brought on by your awareness = you. “but back when x happened-“ the past and the future do not exist. the only thing that exist is now. you cant “apply” this way of thinking to something that doesnt exist. that makes no sense. youre just going to confuse yourself. i am telling you RIGHT NOW the only truly real thing is YOU. that is all there is and will ever be. you can control your awareness through observations meaning youre in total control. read that again.

so when it comes to your sp, romantic or not, they are never not yours. they were never not you or not a part of you. every thought, feeling, affirmation, or word you wrote down, they have received. because its you. think about it. are you ever aware of anything youre unaware of? (no). because things only exist the moment youre aware of them!

and remember, if something can come to our awareness like a relationship and leave our awareness it is not real. but you, as consciousness are infinite and are always here and always consciousness. so you are real!

after discovering non dualism i have thought about the feelings my boyfriend has presented to me and how they currently match the feelings i have for myself. i have always loved myself and will always love myself. if i didnt, how could i expect my creation, which is a projection of my own self image, to have different feelings than me? your sp isnt a separate person. Your relationships will always show how you feel about yourself, romantic or platonic. they’re not real because they come and go through your awareness but your ego as the false self believes they are. and thats okay. thats its job. let it be and observe them as consciousness.

nothing can happen outside of your awareness because the moment you are aware/conscious of something, it exist instantly. so if your sp is treating you the way you dont want to be treated then reflect on your own feelings about yourself. this DOES NOT necessarily mean work on your self concept. ask yourself if “you” think youre worthy of what it is your ego desires. a lot of my blockage came from that. i had to fall in love with myself so my ego could comprehend how i could be loved. because its still me.

lets talk about “free will”.

“free will” doesn’t exist. lemme tell you why. the idea of free will is a person outside of you having a say in their own life. the basic principle of non dualism means theres only one being, consciousness (you). so tell me how can “another person” “outside” of you have a say in their “own lives” when none of that exist in the first place?

your sp having or not having free will shouldn’t effect how you feel about them unless you see them as a separate entity outside of you. they’re not an “object” you control theyre your creation and another form of consciousness so of course you have control over your creations you have control over EVERYTHING.

your sp feels the same way you feel about yourself. always. if you dont feel good about yourself then i do suggest working on your self concept. not to “get” anything but for YOURSELF! why not love yourself? why cart that responsibility off to your creation?

at the end of the day, itll just be you surrounded by your creations. you can pick and choose what they are specifically BUT THE ONLY REAL THING IS YOU

© itgomyway

[rk-ceres]

Pretty Girl- George Weasley

Pairing: George Weasley x Reader (Season of love event) Fred Weasley x Reader(platonic)

Timeline: 6 months after the battle of Hogwarts

Summary: Reader gets injured in the war saving Fred's life, after the war she wakes up six months later and falls in love with George who has been taking care of her loooooooooooonggggggg ass fic. had an idea and ran with it mutual pining (strangers to)/friends to lovers I just thought this idea was cute

Warnings: no use. of y/n or y/h/n its just ____, written in first person, crass language, some dirty jokes here and there, nothing physical, slow burn, !FRED LIVES!, reader is a flirt, mentions of death in the war, reader looses a leg in the war, George takes on care taker role for Fred after he gets injured after he was saved by reader, and any others i missed

A/N: decided to take a stab at the season of love event that one of my favorite writers are hosting right now and half way through i really wished i made this a series but i guess this works better as a long one shot with room for more parts. Theres just so much you can do with this imho but it is what it is sorry for the long ass read it was just too much fun to write this ended to where i could add on parts if i really wanted too so if it seemed unfinished i dunno 🤷‍♀️

My eyes fluttered open and hissed at the light in the room everything hurt groaning out in pain as i sat up “oh good.. youre awake. I was getting pretty lonely being in here the only one conscious” Fred called out to me as i rubbed the eye that wasn't covered in gauze “not to be rude or anything but where am i?” i asked moving my hand to rub the back of my neck feeling the popping groaning in some relief throwing a leg over the bed “whats the last thing you remember?” He asked looking at me i rolled my eyes yawning out “I was fighting back to back with one of Percy’s twin brothers… i found him after…. After Penny died…im not sure which twin i was fighting with… i didnt have the time to pick out the differences. Or ask… we were outnumbered ten to three… the minister of magic came in Percy made a god awful joke…. Which we all shared there was an explosion that flew me and the twin i was with against eachother before the wall could come down on us i put up a shield…. And then everything went black” he shifted on to his side “it was me, you saved me.” He smiled “youre Fred?” i asked finally looking at him taking in his broadening smile obviously thrilled that he had someone to talk too “yeah. Im Fred. And to answer your question, youre in George’s bed. We’re at my flat in the shop” he explained “what am i doing in George’s bed in your flat in your shop?" i made a confused face "i know i didn't fall asleep after an intense love making session after a night in the pub so forgive me i am a little confused" i huffed "no. you didn't sleep with my brother. not yet anyway" he rolled his eyes speaking in an amused voice “youre in his bed because after you saved me. The ground gave way under you. And you fell through three floors of the castle, you scratched your face on the rebar on your way down. It missed your eye by a centimeter. I carried you to Pomfrey, You were in a coma for about five months almost six. I insisted that id be the one to help you recover and with your physical therapy after you saved my life. My Fiancėe Angelina would’ve taken care of your injuries for me since you know… im a guy and youre a chick. Then i went and got myself blown up by Bellatrix trying to save my sister… I failed her and now? we’re in the same boat. George turned his room into our recovery room since its the biggest of the two. Angel even agreed to it. Shes really grateful to you. She and mums been taking care of your chest wound seeing as how youre a woman, George handles your eye and… and your leg.” he smiled filling in the details. “What do you mean my leg? physical therapy?” i asked confused furrowing my eyebrows pulling the blanket off of my waist i looked down at my legs to see my right leg had been amputated above the knee “Madame Pomfrey had to take it before you succumbed. Part of the wall fell on it and it was irreparable. I killed the death eater that did that to you” my eyes started to water breathing heavily because it looked like it was so close to killing me i was relieved that i was still alive "love... hey… calm down its okay” he tries to stand but winces falling back to his bed when a loud sob wracks through my lips “shit… GEORGE! GET IN HERE GEORGE NOW!” He yelled suddenly bursted through the door “she just woke up” he told his twin she started to dry heave he wordlessly pulled me into his chest “shhhhh youre okay love its okay.. youre safe.. youre safe.. Pretty girl youre safe.. Percy sat in here with you for two months straight” he cooed they stayed like that as he comforted me when i finally composed myself enough i pulled back slightly  “thank you” i whispered to him “sorry for ruining your nice shirt… i didnt.. i didnt mean to George” i said louder scooting back to leab my back against his headboard “dont worry about that beautiful, its just tears. im sorry you found out that way” he said softly kneeling by the edge of the bed

“Fred was supposed to WAIT to tell you.” He glared at his twin he smiled sheepishly “I didnt expect her to pull her blanket off!” Fred defended himself “that’s enough out of you Fred” he hissed “im George” he smiled at her gently "______ Barebone, I was a ______…" thinking back to my house in school "in your year. Friends with your brother he dated my best friend” “Penny” we said together and i smiled “youre sitting up on your own. Thats a good thing.” He smiled gently at me “is it alright if i checked your eye?” i bit my lip and nodded at him gently. “Can i borrow your owl to write Percy? I want to make sure he’s alright, we both lost Penny" i said barely audible “of course Pretty Girl let me just finish up here i'll get you parchment and a quill when mum and Ange get here” he chuckled He unwrapped the bandage on her face i hissed at the dull pain in my left eye “good… good love, dilation is good. Can you follow my finger for me?” He asked softly “you're tracking well with your left eye sweetheart.” He mumbled he softly covered my right eye with his palm “can you see anything lovely?” He asked “I see your nose… but its blurry” clearly unaffected by his testing of pet names and terms of endearment  he smiled “it looks like the cuts on your face will scar but Fred and I developed a cream that’ll make it go away in a month if you want to use it. I dont have to put the bandage back on… Is it okay if I check your leg?” He asked being extra aware with me being awake and aware of everything he got consent before making physical contact and i nodded not minding the physical contact he slowly cut away the bandages “any pain?” he looked up at me with his green eyes  “just my side” i whispered “yeah, Fred and Percy said you hit a lot of rebar going down after the wall. I’ll let mom and Ange know to up your healing regimen on your side" he sighed looking back at my leg "so wanna tell me why im in your bed and not in St Mungo's right now?" i asked "y'know men usually take girls out to dinner before having their way them in their bed... with their brother watching... never been one for exhibitionistm you know" i teased he snorted "that'd be the voyeur's fault" George winked pointing back to Fred teasingly "thanks for saving him by the way. don't worry Madame Pomfrey stops by every two weeks and she trained both me and Mum to take care of your daily needs. You're in good hands Angel" He added “incision looks good, you can start using the wheel chair youre a little ways away from getting a prosthetic” he smiled “George dear its time to change her….” “Shes up mum” George smiled “I’ll come back in a few minutes with lunch and your potions. I’ll send a quick Owl to Percy as well” He stood up after wrapping her leg then leaving the room giving the women privacy

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“Afternoon love. You look stunning today” Fred smiled when Angelina gave him a lingering kiss "get a room Voyeur" i stuck my tongue out at Fred he let out a fake offended gasp at me "excuse me ma'am, YOU'RE the one watching ME doesn't that make you the voyeur" he protested "well look at the kettle calling the cauldron black" i retorted "ooh you're just as annoying as..." Molly quickly cut him off before he could mention Ginny pulling the divider so he couldn't see her disrobing “heavens Angelina you're fine shes awake” Molly smiled “Molly Weasley love, ive been taking care of your side. Angies been helping while you were under” she smiles at me "_____, but George has been calling me Love, Pretty girl, Beautiful, Sweetheart, Angel... basically any pet name he can think of. quite endearing" i said with a small smile taking off the hospital gown they put me in “im Angelina, I wanted to thank you for saving my Fiancé” she gently taking off the bandages on my chest “it wasnt an issue I think he returned the favor and then some seeing as how he got blown up just seconds after i saved his behind” i chuckled glaring through the divider "I HEARD THAT BRATT! its not my fault that Bellatrix was a crazy witch out for blood" Fred protested "i fell through three floors for you. i get to have this!" i protested back “he didnt have to do much convincing. George was going to ask you to Yule ball, and any one who keeps that dingleberry alive is a friend in my book” Angie smiled breaking up the sibling squabble we were having “lift your arms for us?” Molly asked when Angelina finally got the bandage off “he was going to ask me to the ball?” I asked wincing when my arms came up armpit height dropping them slightly “ive got you girl” Angelina caught my arms and lifted so Molly could repair the split skin “yeah, he was. George wouldn’t stop talking about it for weeks then McClaggen beat him to it. Sulked for weeks on end” Angie shook her head in amusement "he wouldnt stop moaning about it either" Fred chimed in "he was worse than moaning Myrtle" you could hear the disgust and teasing in his voice “thats sweet. He probably would’ve been a better choice. McClaggen was an arse” i smiled “your cut seems to be healing well, looks like you still have that infection. I’ll add the antibiotics back into your medicine” Molly smiled as she wrapped the bandage back around my chest taking down the divider again Fred promptly flipped me off where i just stuck my tongue out at him again

“Alright George, Fred, we’ll be off” Molly smiled “see you later love, have a good day at work. mum” Fred kissed Angie “call if you need anything George” Angelina smiled he nodded “Take these” George handed her the potions he sat on his bed next to her as he held the empty ones and handed me the full potion phials “how you feeling Pretty girl?” “Like i fell three floors out of a castle” i gagged drinking the potions that tasted exactly like feet "ugh you think that theyd be kind to people who almost die" i choked out  he chuckled “i would’ve said yes by the way” he cocked an eyebrow a me “Ange told her that you were going to ask her to Yule ball” Fred filled in “i wouldve said yes, McClaggen was a dick” i handed him the empty phials as he handed me the full bottles “we can go dancing later if you wanted too, i enjoy dancing i usually go to the muggle clubs on 5th. They have salsa nights, or ball room dancing. You know. to make up for the ball” i smiled his blush grew “i might just take you up on that when youre ready and comfortable enough on your new leg” he fell into a playful flirtation “even with one leg sir, i can out dance you” gaining a laugh from Fred “if youre already joking about having only one leg what was all that crying about?” “FRED!” George tried to scold “Honestly?” i cut him off looking to Fred “i was just glad it was my right leg. I had a bad tattoo that i had to get removed. Someone shouldve told that eater he didnt need to go THAT extreme” i jested “tattoo?” George asked “it was a swallow. It used to match my mom. honestly it really was a bad tattoo” i smiled “you think the healers would let me get a peg leg? OOH! I could even get an eye patch!” They both erupted into laughter “nah im just pulling your right legs since you know i dont have one” “alright alright stop!! It hurts to laugh dick head!” “HEY! Its peg leg to you! I dont have a dick. Or a dick head for that matter. But i will have a fake leg.” i yelled at Fred playfully he just laughed harder at that “ARG MATEY!”  The three share a laugh George catches his breath “who wouldve known you were so funny” he gave her a toothy grin that turned into a closed mouth smile “i make light of bad situations. My brother, ____. He used to call me sunshine and sing this stupid muggle song ‘ive got sunshine… on a cloudy day… when its cold out side, ive got the month of May….’” i laughed “my girl. From the temptations. He used to call me sunshine” “who knew you could sing” Fred Jested “i cant. But he could” i smiled at Fred “you have a brother?” George asked “Had” i smiled “took a curse for me told me to go find mum and dad, Dad died outside the room of requirement, protecting firsties. And my mom… she was tortured near the beginning.” i smiled sadly “Ginny ended up passing too” he smiled sadly she gave him a sympathetic smile squeezing his hand “i was crying because it looked like it came this close to crushing me entirely and for some reason im still alive. Something from the grace of Merlin im alive, i was happy that im Alive” i looked at George who was looking at me with a guilty expression

“come on handsome… wheres that pretty smile you had on for me i worked hard for that you know. Im not a good flirt. I was hoping youd lead, and hopefully ask me to dinner or coffee if i played my cards right. Its not every day someone as pretty as you are is willing to take care of me to laugh with me or at me” i reached up to his face he leaned into my touch chuckling completely red in the face “im okay, we four knew what was going on and what was at risk im okay. Promise.” i smiled softly at him he smiled “Handsome huh?” “You called me beautiful when im obviously a mess.” i shrugged he started smiling again she noticed his dimples and the way his cheeks creased and my face heated up “theres my pretty smile… you have really really pretty eyes… and dimples…. Did i mention i have a thing for guys with dimples.” i smiled rubbing a thumb on his cheek he looked down and back up to my eyes trying to find the right words “youre pretty even if youre a mess” he smiled softly “yep thats it. Ive decided. Youre the handsome twin.” “HEY!” Fred protested “take that!” George smiled laughing at triumphantly like that was an argument theyve had multiple times Fred who was pouting crossing his arms over his chest “youre the nicest twin” She smiled at Fred “acceptable” he smiled at me “im going to get your lunches” he smiled to them “thank you. Can i use your owl again? I need to owl gringots. Get some money for rent and food and care” i muttered to myself “no need. All taken care of” Fred said “you saved me. You dont pay for shit when in our care” he shrugged ending the conversation “do you really want a peg leg?” Fred asked out of the blue “i’ll take what i get.” i shrugged. “At least let me help with groceries” i huffed annoyed “once a month” George bargains “Zero times and shes happy about it” Fred protests “Three times but i let you pay for my prosthetic” she countered “no times, we pay for the prosthetic and she gets what she wants at the shop” fred demanded “we pay for your prosthetic, twice a month, you transfigure your own room, personal care supplies fully yours” George offered “thats a deal i can live with… did you just ask me to move in with you without you asking me out on a date first? When can i expect a proposal? Or should i ask Percy to bring Kingsley and skip to ‘I do’” i smiled at George and he flushed 50 shades of red as Fred snickered “you say youre not good at flirting but this is the third time youve rendered Georgie here speechless” Fred laughed she looked at Fred as he looked back at her “i cant help it i almost died, and lifes too short for me to keep being shy. Theres a first for everything right? Who wouldve known the first man outside of Percy and you i try to actually talk too would flirt with me. He could be my first love, my first actual relationship maybe. He could be my husband one day. Quit butting in youre ruining my shot i dont know how many of these i have you know. Mangled face and peg leg. I wanna get it right the first time! Who knows. Maybe if i flirt enough i’ll get him to fall completely head over heels in love with half of a girl i used to be Perc always told me to put myself out there. What a better time then now?” i shrugged Fred laughed “im not butting out Maam we share a room! Theres no possible way for me to butt out your business IS my business! And with the way youre going Love" Fred called out the way George would say it "he’ll be in love with you by the end of the week” Fred snickered George just shrugged “i had a crush on you in 5th year.” He looked at me it was my turn to be rendered speechless “you wont have to work too hard to make me fall for you Pretty Girl we're already half way there” he shrugged leaving the room leaving me speechless

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A month had passed Fred was able to start his Physical therapy and Molly wasnt coming by daily anymore “FUCK!” Fred screamed “come on Freddie you can do it!” i cheered him on from my seated position on the bed  “it feels like my insides are going to spill out” He whimpered clinging to Georges shoulder “two more steps Freddie. Just have to make it to the chair” George encouraged “FUCK FUCK” he groaned “almost there Freddie youve got this!” He slowly took another step as i cheered him on "come on Freddie boy make that chair your bitch" i teased  he looked at her and smiled “thanks love.” He smiled taking another step reaching the chair “alright good good sit rest. We’ll go back to bed in 5” he smiles at his twin George looked at me with a smile “time to check my stump handsome?” i looked up to George “yes pretty girl. Time to check your leg, and your eye” he smiled i removed the blanket hissing as she moved further up the bed and turning to throw my leg off the side he sits in the stool next to the bed “any pain?” He asked as he looked at my eye with the flash light “just my side. I think your mom said it was an infection again. Apparently my core isnt strong enough to battle muggle infections.” i shrugged “follow my finger” i watched his finger as he moved it “sometimes it feels like my leg is still there and and its like a sharp pain. But its not there and its weird” i talk as he covers my right eye “i can see your face” i smile at him “she woke up screaming last night” Fred said to the air “she said she was fine her leg just hurt” “why didnt i hear the scream?” He asked as he unwrapped the leg “she casted a muffelito on the room before she fell asleep” Fred ratted her out “tattle tail” i stuck my tongue out at him “brat” he hissed back “Baby!” She teased “toddler!” He yelled back “you have crappy hair!” i crossed my arms over my chest “TAKE THAT BACK!” Fred yelled “MAKE ME YOU CRIPPLE!” George laughed at the banter "PEGLEG!" he stuck his tongue out at me "you two are toddlers" George rolled his eyes  “i… have nightmares. I didnt think it was an issue” i said as he looked at the leg “youre healing fast. Should be able to take the staples out soon, we’ll call madame Pomfrey to come fit you for a prosthetic. Tell me if this hurts” he said as he gently massaged my thigh above the stump i gasped as he gently squeezed “feels great” i said breathily “teach me” i whispered to him he smiled as i placed my hands over his he looked back down putting his hands over mine as he moved my fingers showing me how to ease the pain of the lost leg “it wont hurt forever…” he said softer i smiled at him “thank you George for doing this for me” i looked down “hey. Its handsome to you, Pretty girl, you saved Fred. Its the least I can do.” He kissed the top of my head “youre the kindest person I have ever met… and id get myself crushed over and over again if it meant I got to meet you all over again George. You’re making me fall for you. Is this one sided? Dont make me out to be a fool” i whispered in his ear gently kissing his cheek, his eyes widened in shock at the forwardness and tenderness this girl had for him they’ve only known each-other for about three months at this point he cleared his throat taking his hands off her leg “he's blushing like an idiot again! what did you say to him!” Fred who was watching intently with a bag of crisps “did you accio a bag of crisps?" i furrowed my eyebrows “its not every day i have a front row seat to my brothers love life. There i answered yours now answer mine” Fred rolled his eyes “I told him I thought he has pretty eyes” i fibbed they both know i did he raised an eye brow at me George still staring with red on his cheeks i shrugged

“i didnt lie. He’s…." i blushed looking down “nevermind” i turned over in bed facing the wall he leans over placing a hand on my hip gently and kisses my cheek “youd never be the fool when im with you. Its not one sided. Im the fool love made a whole career out of it. But im also a fool falling in love with the sweetest most beautiful woman I’ve ever met and I’m the lucky one to get to take care of her” he whispered into my ear he pushes off the bed “WAIT WHAT DID HE SAY!!!” Fred groaned eating another crisp “thats for her to know. And you to find out NEVER” George said walking toward him “Come on Fred, lets get back to bed” George hoisted him up after putting the crips off to the side “i was eating those!” He pouted “sod the crisps you need to do this pt!” George yelled gaining a laugh from _____. A month had passed since then, “Afternoon Pretty girl, I need to check your stump” he smiled setting my plate of food on the dresser “we can get Pomfrey in here to measure you for your leg soon. And your physical therapy with Fred and I” i smiled back “can you massage my leg handsome? Its starting to hurt again….” i whispered “alright love, just for a little” he smiled she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror i frowned as Fred met my eyes mood immediately dropping “I gotta get down to the shop before Lee bites my head off.” He smiled at me and i returned it “have a good day at work Handsome” “thank you pretty girl” he smiled when the door closed my smile faded as i stared into the mirror tears formed in my eyes Fred looked at her concerned “you okay Love?" Fred whispered “I miss my brother” i sniffled “he always knew what to say” “well im not your brother but im in need for a sister… if youre in need of a brother… i think we both qualify to fill each others open positions yeah?” He asked i turned to him looking at him with tears in my eyes “teach me what to say, let me be your brother love" He looked at me with gentile eyes

“tell me im deserving pf love even if im broken and ugly” i mumbled he was taken aback he took in a breath and smiled “love, you’re gorgeous, George sees how pretty you are and youve got him whipped. You deserve him and the love he wants to give you trust me” hours passed when George walked in with our dinners light sniffles could be heard from the other side of the room my back was turned to him he looked to Fred who just gave him a tight lipped smile and walked to the other side of the room after handing him his plate he set mine down next to my un-touched lunch plate on the bed side table “hey pretty girl…. What’s wrong… you in pain?” i shook my head no “what’s wrong beautiful, tell me what’s the matter how can I make you smile again?” He cooed softly “Dont lie to me” my voice hoarse like i had been crying for hours he reached to wipe away a tear ”what do you mean I’ve never lied to you Beautiful” hurt hit me square in the chest “you just did. You always do.. mangled face, missing leg. I stare at the girl ive become all day that mirror haunts me my own reflection is a reminder that im alone. And im no longer beautiful and its sickening you dont have to keep flirting with me because you feel obligated to. No one wants someone like me. Not anymore im not pretty and im definitely not beautiful. I have no one. No ones here” i sobbed more closing my eyes sniffling “I miss my brother. He would be in this bed with me. Holding me. Telling me to cheer up sunshine the worlds cloudy and gray without you please sunshine smile for me? combing through my hair like he always did holding me together while I fall apart but hes gone. My mums gone. My dads gone. I havent slept in four months the nightmares keep coming back and I just want to cry I cant be the girl that flirts twenty four seven with a guy thats too polite to tell me that it makes him uncomfortable when this is all over im going to be alone again just let mw grieve the loss of my leg, my family, and my face. I have no where to go. All I have is an empty house my best friend died, my leg hurts twenty four seven and I just need to be sad for a few hours can you leave me alone for a few hours I’ll be normal again in the morning I dont need your pity” he continued to wipe the tears off my face as he processed what i said “im not going to stop calling you pretty, and beautiful because thats what I see when I look at you Angel, I mean look at you love…” he said softer “just look at you….. i cant take my eyes off of you… youre just too good to be true the sight of you leaves me weak there are no words left to describe how pretty you are sweetie”  lifting my face in his cupped hands “youre stunning you leave me breathless, all those things you just mentioned are fixable, love, half of what you said isnt true, you really think that Fred and Angelina is going to leave you alone after youre all healed up and better? Youve got another thing coming. Theyre never going to stop you have friends. Percy’s been here every day since we owled. Fred and Angie made it clear youre their person” he smiled softly “im not letting you go either im afraid youre stuck with me you still owe me a date, and a dance” he whispered standing up and draping a blanket over the mirror i cried more as she felt the bed dip behind me he pulled me into his side one arm under my head one on my torso pulling me on my back fingers immediately going to y hair “if you needed someone to hold you. You could’ve just said so I would’ve done this ages ago if you needed it” he brushed his fingers through my hair humming softly

“and you dont have to say anything to me at all. I flirt with you because I enjoy flirting with you. You make me happy and light, you render me speechless and no one. And I mean no one can do that. But you can, thats why I do what I do you dont make me uncomfortable love. I miss Ginny too. She was a spitfire and its hard not having her around anymore, and if its alright, I want to hold you while we cry about our siblings yeah?” He asked i turned on my side draping an arm over his torso “im sorry about Ginny… her and Luna were really nice to me” i sniffled “I need you to eat for me… I’ll eat with you.” He pulled the roll off of my plate, ripping it in half handing it to me “im sorry about your brother Pretty girl" he whispered as he ate making sure i ate some of the food as well

ଘ(∩^o^)⊃━☆:·ﾟ✧*:·ﾟ✧✯:·ﾟ✧*:·ﾟ✧✯:·ﾟ✧*:·ﾟ✧✯:·ﾟ✧*:

A few hours later i let out a yawn d he started to get up out of bed my arm tightened around him feeling safe for the first time since ive woken up seven months ago “stay…” i said softly his shirt balling in my curled hand “please stay tonight” i whispered he let himself fall back into the bed “Darling wha… what do you mean?” He asked softly “Sleep here… in your bed…. I…. I need sleep…. And im scared to….. theyll come back and haunt me” i whispered “mate she hasnt slept in months i stay up with her as long as i can but i always pass put.” Fred piped up blush spread across my cheeks and i let him go flipping over to my other side embarrassed that i needed someone to make me feel safe enough to sleep “nevermind its stupid forget i said anything” i sniffled he simply reached over and turned out the light “i’ll stay for as long as you need me to stay Pretty girl" he kissed the top of my head again pulling me back into his chest his arm under my head curling back to put his hand in my hair other hand engulfing mine “i’ve got sunshine…. On a cloudy day….” He sung softly twirling my hair in his fingers “when its cold outside, ive got the month of may.. well i guess you say what can make me feel this way” she fell asleep holding onto his hand tightly

“George dear” Molly called out “SHHHH!” Fred said getting out of his bed hissing in pain “let them sleep for a little while longer this is the first shes sleeping since she woke up” he looked back to the girl who hid her face in his twins chest “lets go talk outside” Fred smiled one last time at them sleeping before throwing his arm over his mom and leaning on her for support as they walked out of the room shutting the door lightly

three hours later my eyes fluttered open looking at his sleeping face our lips were so close i bit my lip as his breath fanned over my face a surge of confidence emerged heart hammering against my chest i leaned up and gently pressed my lips to his, his brows furrowed as he stretched slightly pulling me impossibly close to him eyes fluttering open “i….. im sorry,. I didnt know what came over me i shouldve asked fir…” i was cut off by his lips on mine the kiss was soft and slow “goodmorning pretty girl, thank you for the amazing wake up” he murmured against my lips kissing her again “dont be sorry beautiful, ive been waiting for that” he cupped my face with his hand my face contorted in pain “thanks for staying” “i told you already baby… im here for as long as you need me to be” i let out a tear “whats the matter pretty girl? Nervous about your new leg?” He asked softly “im actually really excited for that really. Its just that my leg hurts… and its not even there anymore” i cried softly  “it wont hurt forever…” he said softer “i barely have pain in my ear anymore” he smiled showing me his missing ear she reached up and stroked the hair that fell onto the hole on the side of his head “i still think youre gorgeous Georgeous if you will.. ear, or no ear youre perfect to me… so perfect and kind and caring…” i whispered as i kissed the side of his head where his ear wouldve been his eyes widened in shock at the tenderness of this moment, just for him. He chuckles “only you would make that play on words huh? so cheesy Baby" he rubs my cheek with the pad of his thumb “baby youre so beautiful, and i want you..” he whispered moving his face closer to mine “leg or no leg i think youre amazing, smart, funny, and kind. Unbelievably beautiful and i dont think you should use the cream on your scars, it shows just how strong you are they dont define you or subtract from how i see you. And i would love it, if you’d accompany me to dinner when youre able to, i’ll ask again later when you get your leg and i help you learn how to walk again i want you” he whispered softly massaging my stump as he talked my eyes widened “i guess what im saying is i need you here with me… in the flat.. with me.. everyday youre the first thing i ever want to see and talk too when i get home from the shop youre the first thing i cant wait to see when i wake up… and i need you to stay here with me? Please? I promise you i wont hurt you.. just stay with me and i’ll take care of you.. whatever you need. Angel, please  ive never felt this way about anyone im in love with you Angel please... stay" he breathed out looking at me his arm snaking back up and around my waist tightening around me “im in love with you too George, and... and i want to stay with you.. you and Freddie...” i whispered he kissed me deeply it was a hungry and needy heated kiss the hand around the stump tightened as he pulled me even cliser to him putting the stump over his hip “baby i love you” looking into my eyes kissing me again

@george-weasleys-girl

[emerxshiu]

FORGOTTEN LAND'S SECOND ANNIVERSARY :3

I AM SOOOO BACK

I started this drawing yesterday around afternoon and finished it just a few minutes earlier.

I went with a messier type of drawing instead of more clean like the elfilin one from yesterday, i find it fun doing it like this, mostly cause i dont have to worry about making it perfectly so i dont get as frustrated as normal. Id place this one as my second best digital drawing. im pretty sure i havent posted what i consider my best digital drawing here, tho i do have it in instagram, i might post it here one day, tho these two are way too tied up, i love how this came out, its not exactly like how i imagined it but its really close to it, and also itd say that since i dont tend to play around lighting that much, this was such a joy to draw and i cant help but stare at it a lot, at least until i start hating it because i made quite a lot of errors. i also changed my elfilis gijinka just a tad bit from last time, but its not that big of a difference, mostly.

ofc i had to draw elfilis for forgotten land's anniversary, i tend to deny it in my head but yeah they're my fave of the kirby characters even tho i hate them a bit. I wanted to draw some more doodles, like, elfilis eating cake, kirby car, a bunch of other stuff (not elfilin cuz i already drew him yesterday) but when i tried i couldnt draw anything more, guess this drawing burned me out a lot, huh?

you can definitly tell i spent all the efforts on him cuz if you look a bit closer to the bottom part you'll see its almost barely detailed, but i mean, they're the focus so make sense i guess for me not add that much detail there. um also, maybe because i dunno i had OVER 130 LAYERS jeez no wonder firealpaca was slowing down so much, i need to manage my layers better next time, tho i did do something i keep forgetting, wich is naming them (most of them at least) that was a real life saver

Also, antares (fecto elfilis' spear/cadaceus), as always, was a pain to draw, but this time its probably been draw the most accurate out of every other drawing ive made with it in it, i didnt notice it was like, a little curved when it reached the blade

some close ups since his face is a bit hard to see

silly :3

fun fact! actually, this is technically a redraw, somewhere around between february and march i started a fecto elfilis drawing for the first anniversary, but i couldnt finish it in time, and i never finished it

thats...quite the improvement! (i remember being so proud of it)

also his wings are like that cuz i did not want to draw the pattern, its way too hard, i literally copy pasted it, wait, i was talking about the 2024 version but i looked at the 2023 one and i just noticed it also has the pattern copy pasted, i guess some stuff never changes since i still abuse the ctrl+c ctrl+v to this day

Also i ended up making a huge error there, i was planing to add the phantom spears from orbital pulsar (the attack he does first when you battle them at lab discovera) but theres an innacuracy, when they do the attack, they always close their eyes, i had actually sketched him (well i mean both these drawings are basically the first sketch (2023) or second sketch(2024) with some color, shadows and lighting. i didnt do lineart in the 2024 one cuz i wanted to be a bit like the og i made (too bad i sketched that one with black since the og was sketched with white due to me drawing the bg first)) with his eyes closed but them decided to make them open for a reason i cant remember, maybe i thought itd look nicer? idk

ive had the idea of redrawing this for quite some month now so it was kinda already planned

background cuz i think it came out really pretty

doesnt have the little stars since without elfilis and the structures it looks fucked up. the actual sky in game is more blue, but the clouds have some orange, in the 2023 ver. i made the sky orange, and in the 2024 ver i wanted it more accurate, but i didnt wanna loose the orange sky, so i did a gradient. pretty...

also here's a screenshot i took when i was like halfway trough it, its barely noticeable but i changed his mouth in the final drawing

I really love katfl, like a buncha whole lot, its basically almost my first mainline kirby game. 100% the demo, finished the game in almost one day, i literally play it monthly, like, every month i put the card in my switch, start it up, get morpho sword, and go shred elfilis in lab discovera. i would probably not even be here on tumblr and the kirby fandom if it werent for it. and i love it so much i genuinly cannot express how much i like it and treasure it with words or anything

Thank you for reading my unnecesarily long rambles lol

I hope i'll post tomorrow and dont forget like usual

Jambuhbye!

[harpidiem]

Hiii I'm enraptured by those Mad Max scene studies you did, and I was wondering if you had any tips/advice to get started doing those? I want to improve my digital art but I'm not really sure how to start

gosh thank you so much!!

well, first i think the most important part about doing these studies is to not get too stressed about the timer (for those, each one was about 20-30 minutes. if you need, add ten more minutes! theres no rules. youre just trying to learn, its chill :]

i set a timer so that im forced to only think about what is important. i cant make tiny details in just 30 minutes, and its no sweat if the study turns out mushy; i didnt even spend an hour, so its not like i spent 4 hours on something i dont like. i personally think studying sounds boring as hell, so it takes a lot of pressure off of 'studying' if im locked in for just 30 minutes and learning what i can, and if im lucky, it might look kinda neat

id say use a brush with some color jitter to capture some of the complexities of color while you paint, and dont worry about color picking. i just dont suggest color picking often because it desaturates what youre working with a lot. however, if youre a beginner, it can help you recognize how much variation there is between colors (and just how much grey is important. wowza!) again, no rules! do what you need to learn and have fun. i personally dont learn at all if im not having fun. pick a subject youre interested in, and see what you can do in 30 minutes! i personally choose movie screencaps because they teach movement, color, value AND framing all in one go.

heres the process of a 30 minute study i made this morning of a scene from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)

theres a whole lotta goofy stuff i missed as you can see with it side by side with the reference; thats totally ok because the next time i draw this, ill keep the proportions in mind, and not get hung up on details like the camera and remember highlights like on his forehead or the shape of the bag around his neck. mistakes help us learn! copying is NOT the goal of these; its just to see if i can make it feel like the reference. just remember, youre gonna have a lot of ugly attempts (ill make like, ten of these and maybe 2-3 turn out decipherable). dont get too attached, if it turns out mushy, take a quick laugh and try again. could have spent 30 minutes scrolling and instead you made a lovely color salad! keep going!

if you have any more questions, feel free to ask!

[dirtreally]

The ideal toy/action figure is

1) a robot: even if its a really good action figure of like a person or whatever theres always gonna be some disconnect because you cant fucking hide the joints man. And even if you can people just do not articulate like that. If you move your arm your body stretches too. If your toy is a robot it becomes way more convincing as a gestalt being

2)poseable as fuck: rheres so many insanely detailed figurines of like batman or whatever the fuck and hes got bulge definition and kevlar and whatever the fuck but hes a-posingand you can only rotate the arms. Whats the fucking point at that point man.

2.5) it should specifically also have an ab crunch. Ive seen third party transformers that can do an ab crunch while rotating the upper and middle body sections independently and that shit is crazyyyyyyy. It for real adds so much life and presence to poses. The bastard thing about normal hasbro transformers is that they will never ever ever ever make one that has an ab crunch and it makes me so so sad

3) it should transform and/or combine: u gotta give me something to do with it man. Tangentially related but city/base transformers suuuuuck.

Uh huh yeah man thats a city

3.5) it cant be too big or small: if its too big then playing with it becomes insanely unwieldy. The big transformer toys have also had historically awful articulation because of their size. If the toy is too small Its Fine but like deluxe - voyager - leader class ones always feel the best in hand ino. This is why i do not fuck with diaclone.

4) it has to come preassembled it cant be some model kit shit. Sorry im not a real one. Im not about that life. I built a cool (NON GUNDAM!!!!) robot earlier this year and i attached his arm wrong and didnt realise until after i cemented it together and im still recovering. Generally speaking model kits are also mostly hollow inside so theyre less weighty and feel less good to play with.

5) it cant be TOO stylised. This is probably the most contentious one since this is more just a result of me not being The Target Audience but like. Transformers animated optimus prime should not fucking exist in the material realm.

This thing doesnt want to exist. Of course theres the inverse of this where they try way too hard to make it realistic and its like a hypergreebled thing but like thats basically a problem only a specific genre of third party figurines have. The bayformers toys were really good imo cuz they had a lot of detail but still felt very much like A Touy

FINAL THOTS

Every night i see them in my dreams

I know one of them doesnt have an ab crunch but squeezeplay more than makes up for it with the headmaster gimmick and the insane fucking alt mode. Sometimes Just Balling Out Works. This is why i have injector and hes one of my favourite designs transformers has ever done. They for real need to do more shit like him and less Another Guy That Transforms Into A Car But This Time Its 2% More Show Accurate. Its not like i deliberately only fuck with transformers that transform into animals BUT they gotta start finding weirder vehicles to make these from. A helicopter made out of rocks does not count.

I know theres other transforming toy franchises but theyre always either some boutique shit where each toy is 200 dollars or sentai. Which has the problem of not having a lot of articulation (this is fine because these are meant for like 8 year olds but also i straight up dropped boonboomger because every combination theyve given the robot has sucked ass and not even in a fun way like zyuohger). I know theyre doing smp minipla versions that are way more poseable now but again. I dont want to do model kits.

I also really fucking love it when a mecha has like an insane number of guys combining into it. Probably the one time where i will forgive a lack of poseability. Shout outs to go-onger engine oh g12 and boukenger ultimate daibouken (though i feel like this one kind of has a lot less visual impact than the has-1-less-guy super daibouken). The kingohger mecha was a huge disappointment because they wanted to make him one of those guys but by the time they actually combine all 20 bugs literally like a third of them are attached to the back. I feel like relegating a bunch of your guys to Backpack Duty is super cheating. Also the regular nonsupercombined kingohger mecha has spiders on his dick.

[escrupulo42o]

WELCOME TO THE BRAND NEW SEGMENT OF MY BLOG CALLED "INTELLECTUAL TOÑO TIME‼️‼️"😎😎🤓‼️⁉️🔥🔥

in this segment i will show you a song i really like, ill translate it if needed, ill explain/analyze the lyrics and apply them on to my favourite characters!

in the translation, you might see this sign (+), it means that i will later add details that might have gotten lost in the translation or stuff like that. and if you see something between brackets like these [...], its probably some small notes i leave to carify some small detail or explain the use of certain words.

the first song will be "Carismatico" by the argentinian band Babasonicos and the character will be Johnny Cage :D

the translated lyrics are the following:

i thought i saw two clowns

with scared faces, closing the shop

pretend (+), they have their costumes on

they are going to the circus to get the camels

they look a bit spooked

(straight) out from a painting that is about to fade

pretend, they are very sweaty

they carry a bucket with confetti

i have to learn to pretend more

and to not show my emotions

i have to learn to pretend more

and to pilot (+) what i think

i try to reach a door

and i hear a swarm of flies whistling

pretend, they are buzzing my name

we have to leave and i dont know how (+)

i have to learn [the rest of the chorus]

…

[chorus x3 -> as in 3 times, not the silly face]

[theres a secret second chorus that plays over the first one, i will add it by puting between parenthesis]

(some nights im easy)

(i dont abide by limits (+))

(some nights im easy)

i have to learn to pretend more

(i dont abide to limits)

…

i have to learn to pretend more

(i dont abide by limits)

i have to learn to pretend more

and to pilot what i think

ok so now on to clarifications

on the first (+) you see, theres the word "pretend" (or in the original lyrics, "disimula"). in this case it is a way of saying something like "pretend you didnt see/hear it" or "pretend it doesnt affect you"

the second (+) is for the word "pilot" ("pilotear" in spanish). it is an expression used to say something like "manage/stabilize the situation" in the way a pilot would stabilize a plane when going through turbulences (in this case the turbulences would be his thoughts)

third (+), the original lyrics do not actually say that but i had no idea how to translate it + google translate and word reference were not helping, so i had to change it in order to not put a whole ass explanation in the middle of the lyrics. the original text is something along the lines of "we have to leave and i dont know where to leave through". im not even sure if thats grammatically correct but what its trying to say is that he does not know where the exit is.

fourth (+), i genuinely dont know XD. i confess i used google translate for this one

if you are curious about the secret chorus its from the song "Yegua"

now ANALYSIS TIME‼️

the song talks mostly abot social anxiety and feeling like everyone is watching everything you do. at first it would seem like the concept of social anxiety has nothing to do with the egocentric, confident and cocky Johnny Cage, but youd be wrong. in my headcanons, he grew up as an undiagnosed autistic kid in a small town inthe fucking 90's, of course he has social anxiety. he just made himself be this big extroverted and confident person to make up for it. hes constantly worrying about how people percieve him (in his looks, in the way he talks, in the way he moves), about people talking about him behind his back (yk celebrity shit + this can be connected with the flies mentioned in the song), about his emotions being too big, about being too intense, being too much. he was around people who told him he was "bad" (annoying, loud, dumb, etc.) so much that it became a part of his subconsious, a part of his thoughts. they hunt his every move, a constant monolgue of every tiny thing he does wrong. specially when he was younger, this thoughts would get so intense that they would overwhelm him, but it doesnt happen very often anymore. everyone usually assumes he has a pretty high self esteem but he has just gotten really good at hiding his insecurities under layers upon layers of braggings, fake self confidence, borderline narcissistic tendencies and a lot of jokes. he basically made himself charismatic, a.k.a, the name of the song. also, if you listen to that second chorus its kinda like a response to the main chorus. it refers to someone that parties a lot and doesnt care about anything or anyone. it is a conversation between a very insecure and shy person (the first chorus) and an over confident and social person. alternatively, it is a conversation between John Carlton and Johnny Cage.

aside from the lovely lyrics, this song is AWESOME when it comes to the music. it genuinely makes me go insane like AAAHSVAAH i highly recommend listening to it with headphones

i think thats all i had to say about it :P

[meimeikyu]

you 🫵

are there any silly things with the festivalverse gang that aren't reallllyyyy important to the storyline but are neat? Just lil things (for example: my hc that cross is allergic to soy! stuff like that) :D

ghskgshkghsk YES!!! I love projecting silly little details on them,,, mostly on dust he is the victim of most of my projection sorry man

on the allergy topic!! my friend (hi ink) is currently attempting to make my dust have a broccoli allergy! we have a deal that if it draws dust having an allergic reaction to broccoli ill make it canon and ive seen the wips so its technically not canon yet but will be (this is fcking hilarious to me btw it started bcs he was threatening me about it-)

hmmm other stuffs,,,,, killer really likes drama shows of most flavours!! them and dust will watch medical dramas together bcs dust likes the medical aspect and killer likes the silly drama n romance (this one is pure projection,,,, im watching 2 med dramas actively)

hmm ok now im thinking about shows / genres they like so killer really likes dramas n esp workplace dramas (cop, med,,, theres others i just cant think of any of them) n i think action too esp,, cross really likes fantasy and mystery (i think cross would be a good omens fan i cant explain why but canon to my au <3),,, dust likes horror (GENRE NOT THE PERSON) depending on the mood, med dramas (he has a lot of medical knowledge for. totally normal reasons <-lieing),,, but SCI FI. his fav < i am once again projecting. I think horror would like more reality based shows, n more calm stuff (she doesnt get why some of them wanna be stressed out irl then watch fake ppl be stressed),,,

not really important but killer n cross r both albino!!! bcs design purposes (see i made killer albino b4 i finalized crosses design in my mind and then i was like well i want cross to be and. i dont wanna change killer so they both r!!!) its less 'noticable' with killer tho bcs they dye (well make cross dye-) their hair as well as the uh. lack of eyes. they both r tho!! :D

Inks tattoos are NOT consistent! They change constantly no ones ever seen them change or move but every time ppl see him they r different n no ones quite sure why or how (they just sillay like that :D)

Error n Nightmare are canonically married. no ones quite sure how or when that happened or. why (are they in love romantically? the answer is debatable. they are married!!) this has no relevance to most of the story they r both just freaks like that (affectionate)

Ok slightly lore relevant but i wanna add this one too so error doesnt really? exist properly in time??? bcs technically error is one of the "younger" created gods but also it kinda. slipped thru a crack in reality and thats how we ended up here (antivoid) so its not just taht it has a bad idea or weird perception of time it just. physically exists outside of linear time. so error technically became way after nightmare but nightmare knew error as existing before her bcs of errors time fuckery. nightmare is aware of how error functions but the only one(s) who can properly perceive time before error existed and after are reaper and life. Ink also doesnt really exist properly in time but in a less obvious way? ink has a definitive start of creation date but is aware of everything that happened before that he just didnt exist in it,,, after his creation tho? very debatable how he works in time. the only ones hes really close to is dream n error and dream is not sure and you will never get a proper answer out of error lmfao

ok sorgy lore infodump done im insane about them can u tell

ghskghskg theres prob way more but this is all i can think of rn i hope u enjoy!!!!

also i swear i prommy i dont only have lore for the bad sanses i just. mostly talk about them n have more for them bcs they r my favs (which is bad for them. i put them thru the horrors sory guys) BUT the other guys have lore too!!!!

[ganondoodle]

I honestly find it impressive how totk managed to fuck up so bad as a sequel. But truth be told, good gameplay aside, botw already was a whole lot of nothing as far as story and lore were concerned. I just feel like amnesiac Link going out into the world to save some voice is not a good premise, even though botw Zelda has an interesting personality. Idk, I guess botw felt like an experiment that was supposed to pay off in totk, but totk being a disappointment makes botw kind of feel like a waste of time as well

yes and no to that (in my opinion .. just gonna add that to be sure)

what hooked me in botw was less the story that was told and more what was implied, bc it seemed to imply so much, there was so much design that felt intentional- like an introduction to a world with subtle hints towards much much more that would be perfect to dive deeply into in an expansion or second part- just like you said

i personally am a sucker for big environments with enviromental storytelling more than direct dialog in your face- it might be a small detail to some but for me the choice of music, or how little and broken there was really spoke to me (in part bc i am very noise sensitive, id gladly spent hours in botws hyrule field, but id want to get out of twilight princesses hyrule field bc it would get unbearable to me after a while)

but mainly .. it was the world, botw made me feel like no other game has before, it felt so real to me, that this is a world with deep history, most of which unknown, so much mystery and things that existed with no explicit explanation (like man do i love botws dragons ...... and i will not forgive what totk did to them lore wise)-- like with the ancient shiekah especially, they were, or seemed, so drenched in lore you can only guess but yet it felt so intentional, or how calamtiy ganon was this strange being like a force of nature and the gerudo having had no king in so long it was basically forgotten it was ever a thing?? so much to speculate and think about, so much you could do with all those things; you probably didnt aim to get this kind of talk from me but when i talk i talk unfortunately, and botw is my second favorite zelda game (grinding my teeth to dust trying to ignore what totk did to its lore)

if you look at just whats told to you, botw isnt that special either (though at least coherent in itself lol) but its the world and design and mystery that got to me, that i care about so much, care that got almost utterly destroyed by totk bc it made me realize that there .. might have been no intention behind anything, it didnt mean anything actually

its a thing that hurts me so much to know, to think about, that totk cannot be separated from botw, they cheapen each other, people think its just botw+extra, when imo its more like .. botw again but worse, or them saying that botw was jsut a tech demo to the grand game that is totk (i couldnt disagree more to that wtf, totk is more of a tech demo for ultrahand tbh)

i cant even decide whats worse to me, the fact that botw isnt gonna get that deep lore dive in a second part that got me so excited like i never was before after the first trailer, that everything i cared about in it isnt gonna have a follow up ever, the knowledge that there might be no intention and no meaning behind anything in their games, that the next games might be like that too, that its inseperable from totk in the worst way, or that they only damage each other, botw functions better on its own than totk does, but together it worsens both

(i basically just said what you said in long form .. sorry- though i do feel more positively about the amnesia thing in botw, theres tragedy and emotional weight in it and helps immensely to let you and link explore the world like for the first time- plus its a drawback to an otherwise pretty overpowered piece of tech/magic- unlike some other things in a certain other game)

[oetscop]

it hit me some of my newer followers probably dont know about the petscop "logbook!" (i dont remember why i called it that)

since august of 2023, ive been taking detailed notes on petscop. not continuously since sometimes ill take a couple weeks off while i soak things in, but ive so far taken notes up to like 2/3 of the way thru petscop 11. its been quite the undertaking. every single time i rewatch it, i find more i didnt notice the last time, or stuff that didnt make sense without some context in another video later on down the line.

ive had to add addendums over pages and the whole thing is full of sticky notes. my friend called it my mad scientist notebook bc it rly does just look crazy lol. i started it mostly for another friend since we were originally analyzing it together, so theres a lot of spelling errors.

the sticky notes are usually from where i thought of smth when i didnt have the notebook on me, i actually have a shit ton of stuff i wrote on receipt paper bc id still be thinking abt it at work. some stuff here isnt too accurate anymore, but going back to correct things why this has been taking me so long. 🥲

im in so deep that ive had to get another notebook, ive read scientific papers for this and everything. from psychology to the spatial uncanny valley paper to PHYSICS. ROTATIONAL PHYSICS. i am physically incapable of being normal about petscop

[maskedteaser]

hii i just saw the rdr2 matchups you did and i love them AND HOLY SHIT APEX FAN‼️‼️ i love how detailed you are!! love your writing!! so if ur not too overwhelmed with requests id like to make one :3 and honestly if ur doing matchups for apex id love that too there's so little apex ffs, especially x reader </3 no pressure tho!!

anyways as for me. uhh. i don't use labels (aside from being asexual) but am pretty masculine in gender, and my love is for any gender. my pronouns are he/him :3

more about me,, im vegetarian, my favorite animal is the octopus, im chronically ill & disabled, which means i have chronic pain and have pretty bad sleep (literally writing this at 10 am after not being able to sleep all night) but despite that i have a weird paradox where i am kinda strong? like i can pick ppl up. but can't have much activity for a long time lest i cast spell 200 bpm on myself. but for the sake of the ff i could totally bench press arthur morgans 180lb of pure muscle. its true <3

in apex i main wattson and bloodhound! but i also like crypto, octane ofc (who doesn't), loba, and... im sorry.. wraith 😭 i got wattsons heirloom after. a very long time of opening packs AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH no regrets!! french girl with giant nessie plush!!!!! tho i haven't played in forever (and honestly may keep it that way with how much they're nerfing bloodhound.. like.. c'mon man.. not my main.. they've already been nerfed so much 😭)

i recently started playing rdr2 cause im visiting family that has it (theres actually been a lot of funny stories being on an unfamiliar console, like playing 22+ hours and reaching chap 2 without knowing how to save.. and i didnt know how to tell arthurs weight so i kept him underweight for so long my poor starving man </3) after playing rdr1 quite a bit. i also vibed with john hard in 1 but i lowkey thought he was an angsty young adult in rdr2 and not a FATHER. my favs are arthur and javier tho i can barely see the latter cause where tf is he on the map?? same with charles where IS HE??? but anyways i also vibe so hard with kieran.

tho i could talk forever about my interests, other than that for personality: id describe myself as actually kinda confident around strangers, i love to compliment ppl i come across. for friends, much of the same, i like using improv as humor if that makes sense, ive been told im easy to talk to, i consider myself intuitive (also contributed to me being a tarot reader i believe), but i am the type to have a veeerryy hard time expressing negative feelings im having, and never crying in front of people, so no shortage of bottling emotions. im also rather rigid on cleanliness and WILL start tweaking if me/my space goes too long w/o cleaning. i really, really care about people (i would want to be a paramedic!! if my body could allow it..) and i so want to make peoples lives better!! but also can rather easily stop people from walking over me, should they try. i care about kids a lot, and get very peeved when other ppl dont know how kids brains work and mistreat them because of such, and cause they just have no respect for children. honestly with thinking like.. about formulating matchmaking requests i never really seem to think about what id want out of a person. honestly, just when someone cares (wow, such high standards) but should the time come, mmmost times im not afraid to make a selfish ask. most. maybe. sometimes. and im very, very empathetic and it SUCKS i take psychic damage every time someone even remotely, even HYPOTHETICALLY feels bad. this is not a virtue.

for hobbies, i like to play video games as you may have guessed, i also like to read (non fiction, classic lit and danmeis especially), make art of all kinds but mainly physical sketches, and im always looking to add more shows/movies to my watched list.

i love to visit restaurants and cafes and interesting places surrounding food!!! my idea of a good time is eating with people, even if its in a crappy chuck e cheese. i love to try new foods (but it's a bit hard since becoming vegetarian), and i love matcha! i also love visiting just interesting places in general. why go to disney when you can see a beautiful spot in nature, or an art exhibit, or a park, or just the lively downtown? but other than that, i love my dedicated space 💗

i dont like rude people. mean people. people mean to kids and animals. bigots. assholes. any synonym for that. but honestly, not much else. there are other things that sure tick me off but can be pretty easily taken care of or compromised for.

i hope i didnt write a damn essay. half of it was geeking out over interests but. im guessing the brainrot is shared. but thank you so much for even reading my request this far!! (*˘︶˘*)

hii! sure thing! i love doing matchups especially when you guys give me lots of details :) let's get to it :) THIS IS NOT PROOFREAD!!! I'M REALLY SORRY FOR ANY MISTAKES!!!

okay, first things first - let me tell you why I didn't choose other characters :)

❝ im chronically ill & disabled, which means i have chronic pain and have pretty bad sleep ❞

Well, I need to be honest with you, I believe that despite your strenght, REVENANT would just make fun of your disability, he would NOT care at all, he'd probably pick on you and be REALLY rude. I hope it's not offensive (i'm sorry if i'm insensitive, it's not my intention), but I know he'd want to offend you. You could actually have a good hate-ship (if you know what i mean), where the only thing you guys do is fight with each other but I don't think that's what you want.

❝ im also rather rigid on cleanliness and WILL start tweaking if me/my space goes too long w/o cleaning. ❞

I'm sorry, have you seen OCTANE'S room? Let me remind you of that...

Can you see what is happening on his floor? This guy would probably drive you insane with how messy he is and I know he wouldn't care if you tried to ask him to clean it up... It would probably lead to many arguments and fights between you :(

❝and im very, very empathetic and it SUCKS i take psychic damage every time someone even remotely, even HYPOTHETICALLY feels bad. this is not a virtue. ❞

I have this feeling that Loba would see you as an easy target to manipulate, she'd think that she could use you after seeing that you feel really bad when someone feels bad, so she'd probably talk about her past a lot around you - trying to make you feel like you need to help her with everything. I doubt that it could work out :( I hope you see my vision and I'm not weirdly delusional with my ideas.

BUT NOW FOR A RESULT... (NGL I HAD A BIG PROBLEM WITH THIS ONE SINCE YOU SEEM TO BE A GOOD MATCH FOR AT LEAST 2 LEGENDS, BUT I DECIDED TO PICK...)

VANTAGE

I feel like you and Vantage could have a really good relationship! You both seem to aim high with your ideals and I just think that you both are really empathetic, a little bit emotional even... You share the love for animals. She has her Echo and she'd probably die for him. Vantage would never let any animal be mistreated when she's watching.

" why go to disney when you can see a beautiful spot in nature, or an art exhibit, or a park, or just the lively downtown? " - I think she thinks exactly the same! She seems to be a big fan of nature and she is an explorer. Born on a cold planet where everything wanted to kill her, she knows that nature can both be beautiful and deadly. She is also really nice, and I think that when she gets closer to someone, she actually CARES, like...A LOT. You'd probably be treated really well. I think that Vantage would be really patient when it comes to you and expressing your feelings, she'd never let you just walk away if she saw that you were upset, I think that communication and trust is a priority in every relationship.

She'd listen to you when you tell her that you have chronic pain and she'd do exactly the things you ask her to do, always trying her best to help you and she'd make sure you're not pushing yourself too hard.

Thank you for reading 👽👽👽

[corntort]

PLEASE elaborate on the cscu it seems absolutely fascinating

cscu (CAR SALSEMAN CINEMATIC UNIVERSE) is a silly spinoff au incredibly close to me and some friends' hearts. and dicks. mainly hearts.

we saw the one off drawing made by andy tunstall (this one) and went haha ^_^ thats fun! what if he was a ditzy stupid crazy jittery car salesman tho? (MISTAKE NUMBER ONE. IT ALL GOES DOWNHILL FROM HERE)

OKAY im gonna summarize and then get REALLLLY DETAILED so bear with me.

fark and spark live in a mobile home/RV park with ej and astra. ej usually goes to school during the day and astra goes out and does Anything Else most of the time so theyre barely home between school/activities/visiting family. spark is pretty much unemployed, only taking up odd jobs here n there for a little extra cash and spends the rest of the time screaming at the tv/napping/trying to fix her busted up cars in her yard/etc. fark works in the used car dealership obvs. spark spends most nights staking out in front of their mobile home for farks (MANY) enemies that try and get into fights with him. she guards the house with a definitely illegal sawed of shotgun.

spark and fark are a freak ass southern married couple.

the full rundown is fark is working at his used car shop in the DEEP rural south (as in, no other town for at least 60 miles) in a small town. he inherited it from his fsmily after they torn down lots of local loved business for something much "cleaner" and to capitalize on the money they could make of being a good pitstop for traveling formies. clarity and freom were notorious in the town for their disregard of local businesses, making more than enough enemies when they bulldoze/compete with gas stations/hotels/motels for their cleaner more modern buildings. clarity is a pretty busted up bot down here though, unable to get repaired due to her age and her parts growing obsolete, so when she finally shuts down shes shut down for Good, leaving the fortune they made to freom.

freom doesnt use a cent of it, it pretty much just rots in an account since her death kinda fucked him up bad. he lives on the outskirts and doesnt go out pretty much ever.

fark doesnt see much of the money either, separating himself from clarity and freom as Soon as he could. other than them buying the used car lot for him and getting him up and running, he didnt really associate with them, but it disnt matter since the town already didnt like him by association to clarity and freom. and it doesnt help that he oversells the quality of his used cars, giving people pretty shitty deals and making even More enemies out of it.

but the enemies that hate him most are ej (at first) and astra. ej and astra stayed with clarity after fark moved out. fark has a lot of survivors guilt, ej saw him as the brother that left and hes pretty angry about it for a really long time, astra has the same anger but 10x worse towards fark. she suffered the brunt of clarity and freoms manipulation and abuse after fark left and she really REALLY resents him for it. she and ej were forced to move in with him after clarity died and ej warms up to fark because of his youth but astra cant.

theres a LOT of tension between her and fark, but she really likes spark, so she doesnt stay gone for too long (the most is like a week and a half). shes a college drop out because of all the stress it gave her amidst all her family troubles qnd she struggles holding a job down but she gets a bit better with time.

ej is as hotheaded and impulsive as usual, finding ways to take out his aggression in school sports and constant practice. hes just very angry and gets in trouble a lot but he is a really good kid, fark tries his best to nudge him in the right direction, spark also has a lot of patience for both his and astra's tempers, cause she was the same as a kid.

caaaant think of anything else to add its late i shouldve been asleep hoyrs ago.

this is so separated from the canon source it might as well be an oc story between me and my close friends LOL. but i am sharing it with u all as well

[s0lar-ch3ri]

what if i just rambled

like ik people have thoughts that they cant get out but what if i became so autistic enough that i understood the blorbo and- fuck it lets talk about a jrwi character again (spoilers obvi)

i couldnt choose between ollie and jay but i feel like ollie i got more to talk about for so ill do him first then jay cause they feel very connected for no fucking reason

so i think everyone acknowledges that ollie is just a kid but he really isnt just a kid? like he semi has the mind of an adult from the usage of the compass, because it didnt just mature him physically, but mentally too. from what i can guess, it was slow and unnoticeable until it was too big for ollie to know how to handle. thats when ollie was a kid.

yet ollie adapted, and while he really was 12 for that time still, he wasnt a kid. he grew up for a bit, he was an adult. and thats what scared him. because we all have been scared of growing too fast. so when ollie had that hit him like a truck, he didnt want to leave bed and shit. yet he became the adult his body reflected. sure, he never was fully an adult, but thats because hes not just an adult, hes still a kid.

and after he had adjusted to it, he got to have it for a couple more days. then it was gone. all the growth was now unnecessary and he didnt know what to do again. yet he didnt handle it like he did the first time. he thought about it. and again, he got over it. yet he didnt let go of what maturing so quick taught him, and hes still grown after. because hes something in between an adult and child, yet its not a teen or something.

another thing to note: ollie didnt have a say every fucking time. when he aged up, he didnt ask for it. he asked for a way to get him home and maybe it brought out another desire ollie had inside him by using it so much (touching on that more later). when ollie adjusted, he didnt ask to. he probably just wanted to curl away in that blanket and hide, because it was scary out there. yet somewhere inside he thought earl was right (earl calls him a baby or smth because he just keeps on staying in bed) and forced himself to adapt the new adult body. and when he was aged back, he didnt get a say. chip just decided it, thinking thats what ollie wanted. and he did, he did want to be a kid again. yet he wasnt ready yet. but when would he be?

so why do i bring up so much his lack of input? because it sounds similar to how he got onto the albatross. he first was taken from his home, then working with marshal jon, then working with the albatross. now being so amazed by the sea yet scared of its dangers hes been accustomed to quite a bit now, soon enough hes going back home and has to act like he didnt have the most terrifying and great adventure of his lifetime (another detail i wanted to add is theres no way jon and ollie didnt encounter some form of sea monsters or danger after being out at sea so long, we jsut arent told anything about it so yeah extra trauma thoughts).

so to me, ollie's lying (like his dad aka chip would /j). to me, ollie's desire wasnt just to return home. i doubt it was more then just a whiff of a thought that loomed in ollies head. because yeah, he wanted to go home, but not yet. he wanted to be on the ship longer, but not jsut that. he wanted to be able to help his friends. he didnt like seeing his friends come back beaten and bruised, yet being in the corner doing nothing. and he was told by chip that when he was older he could hang out with them on the ship again. so ollie, unknowing of consequences that could happen, wishes for not just a way home, but a way to help. i literally could write theory shit for this cause its not just thoughts for once! niklaus has said that the people's desires can twist from their greed, and maybe ollie didnt realize his greed (or the amount he was asking to be brought real was "greedy" and ollie didnt notice) so it twisted his desire (it being the compass), thus why niklaus doesnt understand what happened with ollie, because accidentally beign greddy can happen, or being greedy in the eyes of another.

i literally dont think ill have the motivation to wrap this up yet so ill do so later

[hexlix]

fyi, w/r/t discord layout changes: they actually did do concurrent testing before rolling it out for everyone, they just ignored the complaining/quantity of people who turned the new layout off in the settings. for some unfathomable reason.

this gets worse the more details i hear about it im not gonna lie......

i know you didnt ask but you've got me heated over this again lol (not your fault btw!)

a vital part of ux is finding the intersection of where the business and users' needs are met & their goals are accomplished. if the users are crying out that their needs aren't being met it is actively detrimental to the business to ignore them. unfortunately, though, and this is... a pattern, unfortunately. the business does not even listen to the designers, or the user feedback, and will believe its own needs supersedes the end user. a designer's job is to find that balance.

i think there are some parts of the new layout that is nice. there are cute little elements of delight and microinteractions that add a bit more of a personal touch even to a non-nitro user of discord! heck, i even like the fact that theres a button at the top to invite someone to a server, and i like that the top of the direct messages shows me what my friends are up to, even.

the aesthetic they're switching to is more "trendy." i can see them justifying the change in architecture to align more with other apps like, to appeal to newer users as someone mentioned to me previously. but... the end result and execution is poor.

i could go on about this all day so sorry to ramble.

tldr: it is likely the needs of the business shifted (and it's becoming more abundantly clear in that because they keep pushing more ways to get capital from the userbase), and that prompted the redesign. execs are probably going over the designers' heads and thinking their needs > user needs, when in actuality its user needs = business needs for a stable environment.

ok thanks (jumps off the soapbox)

p.s i think it is important to listen to the people who actually do like the update too. i am not saying this is you, but im much more interested in a friendly discussion about the discord changes and what you like/don't like about it than to just hear an echochamber. again if you have any questions please feel free to ask!

[bismuthburnsblue]

pre project write up: the coat!

ill keep this short (for me) because i worked through most the details with the wearable mockup from last year, but i wanted to reintroduce this project & the fabrics ill be using :)

This is the final version of my winter coat project, which i am starting at a great time (ill probably finish this well after its gotten cold!) Ive started with a base of McCalls M6800, because im not super confident in my ability to draft a pattern with the correct ease for this type of garment. Ive made some minor fittings (far too much room in one of the front seams for me, and i took some volume out of the skirt area. the shoulders were. weird. i honestly wouldnt rate this pattern super highly it had some grading issues that should have been caught, but it serves my purposes) and now i should be ready to go! i wont be following the instructions very much but theyre pretty basic anyway, so ill just go my own way and see where i end up!

this is kind of the inspo if you want a visual!

the main body of the coat will be made out of this gorgeous, velvet like wool (i think its a blend?). In true Nyx fashion, its black and absolutely impossible to photograph. its probably one of the most expensive fabrics ive ever bought but i looked through dozens of options and this was by far the best one i found. im really particular about textures and this one is just, so nice, and its quite thin for a wool (not in a bad way, its just compact rather than fluffy) which is something im going to appreciate with the amount of fabric in this coat.

Next: the lining! given that i was going to all this effort to make my own coat, i wanted this to be a completely unique garment, in every aspect, including the lining. I knew i wanted something with a design on it, and something that was a dramatic contrast to the outside, so when i saw this gorgeous 'chinese brocade' fabric i knew it was the perfect thing. Its very much. not a lining fabric and was past the budget i had in mind for my lining but i didnt see anything that came even remotely close to this in my mind so i caved and bought it. Even a year on im still enamoured with it and hope i have some left over to use for other things! I did get extra of the slippery black satin i used to line the mock up coat and i plan to use that to line the sleeves just for the extra glide, but ill use this for the main body.

one last fabric! one of the changes i wanted to make from the red version was to add a fur collar so i tracked down the softest faux fur you have ever touched! again awful to photograph, but its perfect, and it was by weight, so now i have a huge piece of this :D

i do also want to make note of the buttons i picked! theyre absolutely gorgeous and i, once again, hunted for ages to find the perfect option and here they are! they photograph a lovely colour but irl the gold is a little pink toned so my extra ass has bought some rub n buff to tone them into a better shade. yes. the buttons. for my coat. listen.

im generally happy with my mock up, but there are a few changes i want to make. the obvious one was one that was in the plans from before i even started the red one, which was changing the collar. i wasnt super sold on it in the first place and the further in i got, the more i wanted a fur collar! since i have so much of my fur, im also planning on adding it around the cuffs and i do keep tossing up doing the whole hem but i think that might be a little much.

The other major change i want to make is to how i finished the coat. im actually pretty happy with the hemming method i chose for the reasons i chose it, but for this version i want to do something different. the plan this time is to do a facing in the outer fabric on the lining pieces and have that completely attached through the inside, removing any opportunities for the lining to show unintentionally.

Theres also a couple of minor fit things i want to change, i want to add more width to the back in case this fabric is tougher than my mockup, i want to rethink how i did my buttons because that made me miserable last time, and i want to add a little length to the hem. oh and better pockets! i need to give it my mega pockets. but overall im pretty much ready to go straight into it! im so nervous