#theres just a lot of horrible factors rn that have built a perfect storm
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
Premium Tumblr themes are available from anywhere between $9 to $49.
Text
Literally feeling sooooo horrible and hopeless oh boy 🌝
#theres just a lot of horrible factors rn that have built a perfect storm#canceled the internet to my old apartment months ago and then they decided to charge me for ‘not returning their equipment’#when ive literally tried to send it twice and get like no fucking direction from them#and i dont have anyyyy money right now#yesterday i was woken up at 10:30 by my dad who had to come home from work#just to move the car cuz these fuckijg. i dunno. gutter guys showed up and couldn’t do anything with my car in the way#i had no way of knowing theyd even be there but i checked my phone and had mean angry missed calls from my dad#all cuz i just couldnt be fucked to wake up earlier#this whole week ive been completely exhausted and i cant do anything as a result i cant focus i cant feel anything its all numb#my mother tells me shes gonna spend money that i guess she does just have ready to throw away on getting me diagnosed with autism#something i tried and tried to tell her for months that i dont need nor want and that its too much hassle#not to mention the price which all my parents do is guilt trip me for costing too much money everything i do that costs money is being cut#necessary meds are being cut off cuz its a waste of money even though insurance covers most of it#but they spend money on this and i just know. i know its gonna be used against me#that if i dont obey them theyre gonna bitch about how i cost them so much money on something i explicitly said i didnt want them to do#its all getting in the way of me just trying to escape now i have to take care of this i just want to cut them off but how can i do that now#i like to lie to myself thinking ill get a job but then i dont my dad yells at me every day for not applying to a job#he gives me big lectures on religion and how im failing and how i shouldnt trust anyone except family#ive gotten an excuse to avoid him last week and this week but its over now so im stuck here again#annnddd to top it off i found a fucking lump in my stomach who even fuuucking knows what it is maybe a hernia or something#so great now i have that to deal with what the actual fuck did i do to get that ughhhhhh#its just another thing forcing me to stay in this shithole it seems i wanna fuckijg bang my head until it explodes#i cant cry though i just want to cry so i can feel the relief but that wont ever happen again cuz im a worthless nothing robot#who feels nothing and does nothing and is nothing
1 note
·
View note