#there's something so parental about it and I'm gonna scream this server will be the death of me

[applespider]

Forever jumping up and down while listing all the great things about Tallulah after she told him she feels worthless )-)0 (<- sobbing on the floor)

[dr-spectre]

man i saw your last two posts and i wanted to tell you, you're not cringe, and you're not unlovable

i've had like, one full conversation with you going back and forth on both shared and unshared interests and it had a profound effect on me at the time

I need to unlearn shame, i need to be more open with what i fixate on and what i'm doing (and also the realization i'm definitely on some kind of spectrum), from one chat with someone *loud and proud* like you, how fucking crazy is that?

I hardly know you personally, but it's not hard to gauge how awesome you are, in face of your perceived faults, several of which i share myself, you yap so much but you're so genuine and passionate i and pretty much everyone who sticks here loves to read it, it never gets old, it never gets annoying

you put your whole pussy into innocuous little things about the subject matter, and it's a wonderful thing

you can find friends, you can find love, and you deserve both of those things

this is a little long but it's sentiments i've had for awhile now but no good opportunity to share......

I.... I..... WHA.

WHAT DO I EVEN SAY TO THIS?!?!?! YOU CAN'T DROP THIS IN MY INBOX LIKE THAT!!!

LISTEN... ITS JUST.... I aint awesome!!! Im some 20 year old autistic dude who's too obsessed with a squid woman! How's that awesome!!?!?!? I haven't made an impact on anything... not on the community... not on inkipedia... not on anyone... I have 300 followers... that's nothing...

...or have i?!?! There's no way I could have had an impact on someone... hell even SEVERAL PEOPLE! I just overanalyse stuff that seems so cut and dry but... people are actually positive about my stuff? People say to me that I changed the way they see this important character to me.... BUT THERE'S NO WAY RIGHT?!?!? I still feel like a drop in the ocean. Just a spec of dust!!! I haven't made real change yet... OR HAVE I?! I DON'T KNOW!!! WAAAHHHH!!!

Maybe.... maybe if I have changed one person's perspective, then maybe it was worth it in the first place...

You know. I wanna say that the reason I came to tumblr was because my irl friends aren't into Splatoon and my family gives me a meh shoulder shrug to my interest. It was so difficult for me to explain Splatoon to my parents when Splatoon 3 came out and I picked up the game at launch! So I went here because I felt like it was the best place to express myself. And yeah I'm glad I stuck with it honestly.

I get why my irl friends aren't into Splatoon, they need to buy a multi hundred dollar console that's about to get replaced soon just to play 2 games. And trying to explain to them Nintendo Wii U and Switch emulation is just... I dont even wanna attempt that HAHAHAHA!!!! So I often felt lonely and it felt like I was screaming into a void when talking about Splatoon to them in a discord server. I guess that's where my sense of loneliness comes from.....

I genuinely have NO ONE in real life to talk to about my interests and have someone ACTUALLY listen. I guess that's why I feel cringe and not cool at all. My interests are so nerdy and I'm on the spectrum, my social skills are like D tier. I genuinely cannot talk about myself, i really cant. Its why i have never been in a romantic relationship before.... As a 20 year old dude, that shit fucking stings I'm not even gonna lie. I think about that shit every day. LITERALLY EVERY DAY I'M NOT LYING!!!!

But anyways, I'm getting way too personal on the internet. I don't wanna be some sad sap.

Thank you. Seriously, thank you. I'm not sure if I truly feel like I deserve love but. Thank you anyways. I guess it is a good quality to have that I can ramble and yap and become really focused on something, even if it's not adult things like... getting a job, paying taxes or whatever HAHAHAHA!

[leonidas1754]

On one hand, I get it. No one wants to pay a bunch of money for gaming, including me, considering I'm flat broke 99% of the time. But at the end of the day, I've always felt this is kind of a weird argument.

Let's ignore the season passes and microtransactions and all that, we all know they shouldn't be in games, not to the extent that they are currently at the very least, and DLC is an entirely different argument due to the wide variety of things being called DLC.

I think ignoring the whole inflation thing is kind of ridiculous. You could make this argument for anything, and the main reason this feels like so much more is because wages have stagnated compared to the rate of inflation. I don't know if the whole "it actually costs less than a Wii game when adjusted for inflation" thing is true, but on the whole, I think it doesn't entirely matter. If games are, effectively, cheaper now than they were then, that's entirely what you're asking for, and the problem with that lies entirely outside of the actual price of games and more with the way our economy is utterly fucked right now. And pointing to kids not making enough allowance to save up feels absolutely absurd as a reason for games to cost less. Yea, a lot of games target kids as their audience, but a lot don't, and even those that do aren't expecting the kids to buy them, they're expecting the parents to. Parents not giving kids enough allowance sure as hell isn't a video game company's problem.

Nintendo is, at the end of the day, a company trying to make money. Personally, I'm not crazy about spending so much for games, but I'm at least a little more willing when it comes to Nintendo over other companies. I can at least expect a decent game that isn't completely and utterly broken, and we can argue about the price and benefits of Nintendo online, but the fact of the matter is that online servers cost money to buy and maintain, so it makes sense for them to charge something for it, especially as their userbase is bigger than ever. At some point, it just stops being feasible to provide that service for free.

When it comes down to it, it's just like any other hobby, you gotta pay the price for it. Games are expensive to make, so they're gonna cost a fair bit, not to mention this is an OLD argument. People have been screaming that games shouldn't cost so much since the Gamecube era, and probably before that even, and the idea of kids not earning enough allowance to buy a video game isn't anything new either. Indie games are often cheaper for a number of reasons, yes including lack of brand recognition, but also because they're typically not giant teams, oftentimes using things like Early Access to help fund their projects (so 'investors' are only looking for a finished game, not their monetary investment plus interest or other profit), and many even start as side projects while people work other jobs.

There are absolutely reasons to argue games could and even should be cheaper, but "because kids don't get enough allowance" is such a childish argument it sounds like something an actual 10yo would say.

ok I got into an argument with someone in my media class yesterday so I’m just gonna say it:

No video game should cost $70.

I’m sure the new Zelda game will be great, but no video game should cost $70. “But if you adjust for inflation, this is actually less than what the Wii games were,” cool. No video game should cost $70.

We no longer live in a world where a kid could save up their allowance for a couple months and then be able to buy a video game. Just buying one has somehow turned into such a grandiose adventure it takes all of the fun out of getting a new game.

The only possible benefit might be that, with games being so expensive, people might be more likely to pick up an indie game because those companies can’t afford to sell those games for a lot.

This is becoming normal. I used to be able to buy four ds games for $70. What the hell.

And you know damn well that Nintendo can afford it.

[ashedflower]

Sleep Deprived Prompts.

Chapter 1: Flower Husbands but Empires SMP and with Tommyinnit.

So! Flower Husbands. But in Empires SMP and with Tommyinnit. 

Like, think about it.

The whole ending thing didn't happen, and instead Jimmy and Scott have this wonderful wedding and live together. Like, Jimmy lives with Scott and do all his Empires duty's there but goes back to the Swamp Empire whenever he needs to. Like, meeting with the Cod Council or something. Idk, I'm bad at politics. Unless it's about trading. Then that's a different story.

Anyways!

So, they got married. And like, one day Jimmy or Scott sees a Blondie playing with his child (like when he's out doing errands or something) and goes all "Huh, Jimmy would make a great father..." But turns sad because he can't give Jimmy a child because no Mpreg in my AU... Yet. Anyways, he goes back to the palace/castle and Jimmy seed him all sad and goes "Are you okay Scott" and since communication is healthy Scott tells Jimmy what he saw this morning and why he's sad.

Jimmy being a wonderful husband, comforts Scott and tells them that "Hey! Maybe we can get a child!" Scott then says he doesn't wanna adopt one, he wants to actually give Jimmy a child with both their features and blood running through the child veins. (the blood, not the features.)

But then Jimmy then gets an idea that maybe Gem can help and shit since she's a witch) wizard and.... Magic. I have no explanation.

But then Lizzie who was there the entire time because she was visiting (I forgot to add that) chimes in about how Fich Hybrids can in fact get pregnant and impregnate regardless the sex. Why? Because fish biology, Idk man, you decide why. 

And so they did. And out comes Tommy. With Scott's eyes and Jimmy's hair.

Except he wasn't named yet, only nicknamed. Because according to Rivendell traditions, A child can only be named on their 3rd month of living. Why? Because...

But before Tommy turned 3 months, some old enemies of Rivendell pop up and cause havock across the server. Like war and shit.

And of course as King and Emperor, Jimmy and Scott had to fight in the Frontlines and left their son to the care of the palace maids. 

And of course, since Scott is married to Jimmy that means their Empires are natural allies, and by proxy so is the Ocean Empire and Mazelia. And well, it's hard to win in a war with a kingdom with that many powerful allies. But then the enemy decided that the best way to defeat the enemy is by getting rid of the thing they all have an attachment to. And what or who do they all have an attachment to? 

Who else then the son of of both the King/Emperor of both Rivendell and Swamp Empire. The nephew of the Ocean Queen and the King of Mazelia. 

Tommy. 

So they did. But then an alarm spell thing that Scott added on Tommy just in case. Rang and alerted Scott and Jimmy of the kidnapping and had both of them to go back to the palace. Jimmy arrived first for reasons, and found the maids out of commissioned/knocked out or killed and the nursery empty of any blond hair child. 

Naturally, Jimmy screamed...

Lizzie found about it and went ape SHIT/BAMF Ocean Queen and killed each enemy. 

And that's when the enemy knew... They fucked up.

So their all dead now. 

Except for the person who kidnapped Tommy, because that person is still alive and booked it out of there. Leaving Tommy in a random forest in a random server. 

Then out comes Philza! He saw Baby Tommy and went "is anyone gonna adoot that child?" And didn't wait for an answer. 

Of course, he didn't do a good job since he left the explore the world with Technoblade/help help with voices and stiff and essentially neglecting him and Wilbur.... Yeah, we got Bad Parent Philza here folks. 

All of the same stuff happens. Dream SMP, petwars, war of independance, election arc, etc... The only thing that isn't that same is that Charlie is alive and kicking. My Slimecicle and Quackity fic is canon here bitch. 

Now, the revivival of wilbur thing is still canon, and so is the burger van. But that's how canon takes a turn and he lost in the woods of Headcanons and my denial. 

Because finally, after years of looking for their son, Lizzie had got a lead. See, Lizzie is the Ocean Queen and the Goddess of the Sea', and therefore the sea obeys her commands, and in her greif of losing her nephew, she ordered to sea to find him. 

Now, most of Tommy's life he's been away from the ocean. The cabin he one lived at with the Sbi was int he middle of woods and therefore incredibly far away from the ocean.

But at his second exile he lived beside the ocean. And slept beside it. Basically, the reason Tommy keeps waking up in the Ocean is because Lizzie was calling for him via the ocean. Of course that ended up with him being traumatized more, but that was accidental. So yeah....

Anyways, Lizzie got a lead, found out about the Dream SMP server that got locked down years ago, and went "Well, won't be the first time I broke into a server". 

And then told the others, to which they went "Fuck it, why not." And broke into the server.

You guys can take it from here, this has gone way too long.

[heleneplays]

RELICS MC PROFILE

Helene Spillane || Linguist

Ethnicity: (in-game) American, with Chinese descent || (hc) American, with Chinese & Filipino descent :)

Personality Stats: (end of Book 1) Suspicious - 63% • Professional - 51% • Spiritual - 57% • Altruistic - 84% • Adventurous - 68%

Skill Stats: [I forgot to screenshot my first from book 1 so i'm gonna use the sequel demo stats ( •̩̥̀ω•̩̥̀ )7 ] Subterfuge - 12 • Gunplay - 11 • Charm - 7 • Reactions 5 • Fisticuffs - 3 • Athleticism - 3

Priorities: Money • Academic Reputation • Politics • Glory

Relationships: All in wonderful standing || Everyone alive & healthy

Orientation: Lesbian 👭🏽💖

Romance Option: Still not over María García Pérez & is hoping and yearning to get back with her

Other Info

Birthday: January 10th

Height: 5'1 1/2

Blood Type: O+

Parent/s Status: Disowned Hasn't talked with one another for serveral years now || because of their fighting over her career, lifestyle choices & sexual orientation

Fun Facts:

She considers herself to be raised by her Grandpa Jack + Molly & Grandma Elíza, since her parents... she didn't have a typical childhood, that's all I can say.

Learned how to pickpocket, dance & shoot a gun from Jack; learned how to cook, dress fashionably, and take care of people from Molly; learned how to be unapologetic yet unfailingly charming, fine-tune her presence, and sharpen her instincts from Elíza.

Combined, they all taught her how to play & gamble like a pro, including cheating in the games :) [spoilers ;)]

A natural polyglot, learned & fluent in 16 languages by age 9;;; one of the reasons she got into archeology was bc of her fascination with the way humans developed languages (and also her morbid curiousity abt the dead)

But also it's about the adventure <3

Talented in the arts, which helped her as a visual learner; keeps it secret because it's something private she likes to keep. Much like her past with María 😔

Favorite season is Winter because it means cold air, ice skating trips, going in the woods, and cuddles 😳

Outgoing & Friendly, allegedly. Actually v Private & Sarcastic at the privacy of her own home or with trusted friends

Hates smoking but loves drinking

Her aesthetic is primarily rooted on elegance & a dash of hominess, and a lot of functionality

Generally obeys rules, but bends or breaks it if needs must

Radiates BDE x2 (Big Dick Energies & Big Dumbass Energies)

Can and Will kill if it's nazi lives 😌🔪

hmmm what else

OH YEAH

FOSTERS CATS WHEN SHE'S NOT ON AN EXPEDITION BC SHE'S V SOFT FOR THEM AND ALSO IT'S ABOUT LOVING MAJESTIC CREATURES

---

So far that's the extent of my ideas for my MC bc to be honest the bullet points just said: Disaster lesbian for María, Big Dumbass Genius, & in possession of only one (1) functioning braincell

ANYWAYS I just want to thank Mr. James Shaw again for developing this game universe :') I'm just so inspired for it and I scream everytime he just comes out popping into my notifs :'D

but seriously, my clownery? in this blog?? being noticed by OG source of all these??? I am dying from a mix of glee, shock, and shame. I am small and baby & I don't know how to cope other than memes and more memes like the absolute clown I am 😳👉🏻👈🏻 ANYWAYS if you're still reading up to this point,,,, so sorry for making u read all my ramblings & THANK YOU 💖💖💖

[kayzume]

Pairing: Android!Tendou Satori x SicklyF!Reader

Genre: Angst-ish

TW: Character Death (non gore)

WC: 1.7k

Note: Rushed...very. This is my contribution to Haikyuu HQ server collab and my very first time joining one, so I’m uh nervous af. I hope this was sufficient enough:)). Lots of talented writers and artists are participating so make sure to check the masterlist right here

Also: Mama @prismaroyal thank you so much (T^T)..what would I do without you🥺!! @shinrurie and @yacoka thanks for hyping me😳😭

Back to Masterlist

"Is X00 ready?" your father spoke in a low voice.

He looked at you and smiled "just a little bit more my angel, dad is gonna give you the companion of a lifetime" he told you gently. 

"If I even have a lifetime dad," you told him weakly and he gave you this mourning look "y/n don't say such words!" he said to you while shaking his head. He crouched down to your level and caressed your face "I'm gonna make sure that this droid will help you recover, it's not over yet please have more faith in yourself, you'll be fine, you'll get better and-" he sighs then grasps your hands lightly "and we'll be together for a long long time."

You knew that your father was grasping on his false hopes of you getting better. If somebody looks at you in your current state they would surely figure out that your gravely ill, your skin has lost its regular healthy appearance, your eyes were sunken.Your father is a scientist, he's done a lot to help you recover. He tried inventing various ways, medicines, and such to help your gravely ill body to become healthy, but to this day, nothing. None of your father's hard work barely made an impact on you. It always ends up on him getting upset that none of them is helping until today that is.

"He's X00, he will be your companion from now on, he's modeled after caretakers and nurses I'm sure he will be a good factor for your health" your father exclaimed while smiling widely. You shift your sights from your dad to 'X00' he was tall and kind of lanky, with wild red hair and mysterious red eyes, for an android, his eyes seemed so full of life, a clear contrast from yours, which appeared lifeless even for a young girl such as yourself? he was staring at you and you felt weird, like his gaze pierced into your soul itself. Shaking the thought, you stared back at him and he blinked. Wait did he just blink? "He can- h-he blinked, at me!" you told your father incredulously, but he only laughed at your surprised reaction.

"Well of course he can, he was built to act completely human, how else would he be able to sympathize with you if he can't?" your father said in a matter-of-fact tone. "I'll leave you to him so you can get to know him" he continued not leaving time for you to say something. You sighed in defeat at the realization that you are now stuck with a mecha humanoid that's just standing there, staring at you silently. Your father must be kidding, how in the world are you supposed to communicate with a metal piece of junk. You were never a fan of technology in the first place, always believing they were a pain and they stole a lot of your father's time. You looked back at 'X00' he doesn't look half bad if you bypass his blood red eyes “You-" you tried starting, but then you started coughing vigorously, it was painful to say the least noticing bits of blood on your hanky, you decided speaking is not the best idea at the moment. He looked clearly worried and you averted your eyes in response, away from his face. You closed your eyes and faced the other side of the lab overlooking the garden, but when you opened your eyes he was there crouched in front of you, staring.

"What the fuck!" you exclaimed startled, a hand to your pounding heart.

Then suddenly you felt a hand to your head making its way to caress your cheek tenderly, it was him. He looked extremely gentle for someone who doesn't have a real heart, you happen to look away only to take notice of your hand now resting on his other hand, something you didn't even notice. You peeked at his face, he was sporting a sweet smile, and you feel the hotness creep all the way from your neck to your face. You lightly try to pull your hand back "Oh uhm give my hand back please" you squeaked. He let go of your hand and proceeded to the back of your wheelchair, slowly pushing your way out of the lab "D-do you have a name? b-besides from X00?" you asked dumbly. Of course, he doesn't, he was only activated today "How about I give you one?" He didn't answer, so you opted to stay quiet as well. How exactly is he supposed to help you when he doesn't even talk?!

Time passes by the two of you and he's slowly acknowledging you. It feels like you're teaching a chick how to speak, rather than him caring for you, it was the other way around. Every time you are to spend time with your mother and father, he would be taken away by your father's attendants, claiming that time with the family was for the family alone, you always missed the forlorn look painted in his eyes. The first time that it happened it took you solid 10 minutes to reassure him that you'd only be apart for a short while. You might not admit it to anyone, but being around him slowly makes you feel at ease and surprisingly you could feel more energy surging through your body. As crazy as it is his presence gave more to you than necessary, and you're loving every bit of it disregarding the fact that being with someone like him is impossible. He understood you and stood by you regardless of what is and whatnot. You were thankful for him being a shoulder to lean on and just for being your friend.

Today, you and X00 will be picking out some flowers. Your mother had said that the air outside mixed with the flowery aroma will help you breathe better and upon hearing such, X00 ushers you both out immediately, you have regained your footing all thanks to X00. Though he barely speaks he always makes your day by humming a specific tune, It was your inspiration to be able to walk again, to be able to dance along with his beautiful music. You knew in the short time that you were together that something changed, you weren't able to pinpoint what it was exactly, but it's definitely there looming over you.

Some things were starting to feel different, the innocent looks turned to something more when it's just the two of you, for you at least. You try to brush off the feelings evidently growing on you as time passes by, you always have to remind yourself "y/n he's a metal junk, he doesn't do feelings" after you're mini realization you fought back the forthcoming tears, but to no avail. You looked up at the sky, asking whoever was up there in heaven, "why me, why us?"

"I" he started, making you look at him "Hmm?" You urged him to continue

"I want...I want a name" he said. The gesture stirred something heart-warming in your chest, but before you could even give him a response, you felt a sudden chill in your back and slowly you feel your world begin growing dark.

Murmurs, murmurs, and more murmurs. You can hear voices but all words seem to be incoherent.

"How is she?" a voice you recognized as your mother's, you can already imagine her pacing around the room by the sound of her concerned voice. She was the type to fret over everything.

"It's not looking good" you presume was your father's, as he gave an exasperated sigh. You thought why was everyone so gloomy? what is happening?

You slowly opened your eyes to the blinding white lights "ugh" you let out in pain. Why does everything hurt? What is with all these tubes and wires stuck on you? You know what was going on. Deep down you knew, but you decidedly keep on rejecting the idea of you passing. You thought if you leave now, how is he gonna keep going, and for what? The thought of him made you snap. 

"WHERE IS HE?!" you screamed startling your parents.

"y/n calm down, sweetie," your mother said while rubbing your back to calm you down "stressing will only make things worse, hmm" as if on cue you felt a sharp pang course through your body "Argh!" you yelped in pain, "hah..hah...hah" you started breathing heavily, the pain is starting to become unbearable, "Mom it hurts...so much" you clung to her as if it will make things any better. Your face is scrunching in pain, tears are starting to sting your eyes. Your mother was cradling you in her arms, you can feel her shaking. She was crying silently and it makes things extra clear for you, This is the end.

You calmed yourself down and pulled away from your mother. You looked her in the eyes and stated "I want to see him, mom, for the last time, please" you pleaded with her. She kissed your forehead and gave you a comforting hug. You both knew that this meant goodbye and it was hard to let go. Your father couldn't stand to look at you so helplessly that he decided to leave without saying goodbye. It was for the best you thought. The door screeched open, he stood before you. He looks forlorn as if something was taken away from him. "Come" you signaled him to come closer, he scooted next to you. You caressed his face, memorizing every inch, "I- I want you to remember that even though it was only a  short period of time that I was with you, I have loved every single aspect there is about you. I remembered you stating that you wanted a name, hmm, your name shall be Tendou because you were heaven's grace to me" you whispered. "You may not be able to feel love, but remember that this heart has only beaten for you." you continued leaning close to put his hands near your heart, with a longing look you placed a loving kiss on his forehead.

You gave him one last smile, "Farewell, Tendou"

Tendou cradled your lifeless body against his, berating himself over not being able to shed a tear. Deep inside him he was praying, “In our next life we’ll be together, I promise” feeling the heaviness in his heart “I loved you too”

[nona-gay-simus-main]

Top 10 Worst Tropes in Romance - Part 2

Disclaimer: This is MY opinion, you do you.

Part 1: Here

1. The Child Partner

I’m not talking about literal children, because duh. What I mean is the a person who needs their partner to emotionally parent them.

Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like the whole point of a romantic relationship is to be with an equal. You’re supposed to be teammates, best friends, and lovers.

Of course, I'm not including cases where one partner is disabled or chronically/mentally ill and needs the other to take care of them - that’s an entirely separate thing. 

I'm referring to people (usually cishet men), who constantly need their partner to manage their moods and emotions. They always have some ~trauma~ to manipulate the partner into staying in the relationship in order to keep reassuring them, confirming their self-esteem, and even doing their cooking and cleaning, as if they aren't abled adults with two functioning hands.

That shit sucks!

Imagine doing that for someone all the time and then also trying to have a kid (or multiple kids) with that person. Not only will you be taking care of your actual child; but also - your partner-child. Stop normalizing lazy, emotionally stunted men. That shit ain't cut no matter how hard his abs are or how big his dick is.

2. “I’ve been in love with you since the first moment we met.”

I don’t know what it is about this trope, but it shows up in many romances and it always makes me uncomfortable. How the hell are you supposed to react to that? 

Oh, you’ve been in love with me since the first time we met? Yikes, my dude.

You can’t even fall in love with someone that fast anyway. You're not in love with the person, you’re in love with your idea of them!

The only acceptable version of this is the one where it’s more along the lines “I thought I might fall in love with you if I spent any more time with you.” But other than that, I really don't understand why this is a thing?

3. Lust = Love

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a prude. I’m perfectly fine with couples who have loads and loads of sex. I’m also perfectly fine with casual sex and friends-with-benefits and any other consensual arrangement between adults.

I just get tripped up when pretty much all a couple does is have sex. They have little in common outside of sex, spend little time together when not having sex, and don’t share any hobbies, interests or even conversation topics. Or worse, when they aren’t having sex, they’re fighting. 

If you want your characters to get laid, that’s cool. But if you want me to believe they are also falling in love - you’re gonna have to try a little harder.

4. BDSM = Abuse

Yes, abuse happens under the pretense of BDSM, but BDSM is NOT inherently abusive. It only happens within pre-established boundaries and safe words and with explicit consent. The only people who claim it's abuse, are people who have a vested interest in controlling what women and queer people do with our bodies.

So I really, really hate it when people use “It’s just BDSM, don’t be so uptight” to justify their rapey, abusive love interest’s actions. If the submissive has not already consented, or their consent was obtained through manipulation or intoxication - it’s not meaningful consent.

BDSM is a lot more complex than some of the simplistic catchphrases we use to explain it to the vanillas, and we can discuss those complexities for hours, but at the one thing is definitely true - the Dominant only has as much power as the submissive is willing to give. If they (knowingly) cross a boundary or take power without the consent of the submissive, it’s not power exchange, it’s abuse, pure and simple.

5. "All women want him. All men want to be him"

Really? ALL women? Are you sure?

I hate to tell you this, but some women are exclusively attracted to other women. And some women aren’t attracted to anyone. Some women have low libidos, and some women just don’t prioritize sex and relationships for whatever reason. And some women are in happy, fulfilling monogamous relationships already.

And all men want to BE him? Did you know that some men are attracted to other men? They might want a piece of that too. Or perhaps, they just don’t value being some alpha douchebag and are happy to be their much better-adjusted self. That's a thing.

Can we let this cliché die already? Please?

6. Giving up your dreams for ~love~.

Oh man, this is the worst! And why is it nearly always the woman, who has to make a choice between her career and ~~~LoVe~~?

So many books/movies etc. start with this powerful career woman and then by the end reduce her to nothing but a trophy to her man. That’s not feminist, it just keeps perpetuating the same tired gender roles.

And I can’t help but think about the future of this relationship. What if it doesn’t work out? Then the partner who the dreams were given up for looks like a jerk, even if they never asked for this.

And even if it works out, the partner who gave up their dream job, or opportunity, or whatever, will always have this “what if” at the back of their mind. Over time, they may even end up resenting their SO, especially if things don’t work out for them career-wise.

Just such a bad trope all around. It’s not romantic, it’s toxic, and co-dependant and I want it to stop.

7. He treats everyone like crap ***but you***.

You know the limitus test to see if someone’s a good person? Look at how they treat people who are “beneath” them. Their servers, the cleaning lady, etc.

If this guy treats servers like crap, treats his friends and family like crap, treats everyone like crap, except for the person whose pants he wants to get in (or wants to keep getting in for the foreseeable future), why are we romanticizing him? He’s a selfish jackass.

You can have a grumpy (but ultimately caring and good-natured) character, that's fine. But if he only treats people like humans when it benefits him - that's not sexy, that's sociopathic.

8. Love Cures All

Ahhh, the worst of them all. Truly, having a character who suffers from mental illness or has a major trauma, but oh look, they got some cuddles from the love interest and now they are all good!

Just stop, please. It’s so damaging to the people who are going through this, to tell them that all they need to feel better is ~~~LoVe~~~. And if they aren’t getting better? Well, they just haven’t gotten enough ~~~LoVe~~~!

It’s also damaging to the partner - no one should have this much responsibility on their shoulders.

Obviously, the love of a partner, friends, and family can HELP with the healing process, but it’s not enough by itself. Get them some goddamn therapy, please.

9. Accidental Pregnancy

I don’t know about you, but for most people I know, myself included, accidental pregnancy would be an absolute nightmare, not something romantic.

Do you know how bad my entire generation is doing financially? And people use this as a plot device to strengthen the relationship?

Also, relationships get weaker after having a child, not stronger. Babies are cute when they are sleeping, the rest of the time they are crying, screaming messes. Yeah, why wouldn’t sleep deprivation and constantly hurting everywhere strengthen your relationship? 🙄🙄🙄

10. Violent Men

IRL, violent men are scary, not sexy. Even if the violence is never directed at the love interest, chances are that over time it will be. But even if it’s not, why would you ever want to date someone who has the emotional maturity of a pre-schooler?

Because after pre-school, kids tend to learn to solve their problems with their words. But I guess your love interest hasn’t matured past the age of 6, which coincidentally also leads back to the first trope on this list. Charming.

[gee-ef]

UNEXPECTED ENCOUNTERS

"Still can't sleep at night?"

A familiar voice and I got distracted from choosing what kind of cheese should I get.

I can not remember when was the last time I heard that voice. But my senses can recall and flashback memories. I can't believe that I'll see her again, after years.

Almost lost my cool when she approached and place a block of cheddar on my hand and bottle of vintage on my basket.

"Should stick to what is good for you."

"Still authoritarian as always. And yes insomnia is back" I utter. I didnt say anything else but then deep inside, my soul is screaming, asking, looking for explanation. I still choose not to ask.

"This is a surprise that you are doing the grocery shopping, you don't like doing this by your self." she said.

I don't have a choice. I said quietly.

I don't know what happen but just like before, with one stupid but amazing smile she changed everything. And just like that, we found our selves talking and laughing with little silly things. Like what we used to.

Shelves of goods quickly being empty by shoppers and lines at the check out counter are getting longer but she didn't bother. She always take her time when doing anything. Me, I'm always on a rush.

I know that this is just an unexpected encounter.

Nothing special.

Nothing else.

Nothing.

I'm drown with my thoughts when she said,

"Just came back, and I think I'm gonna stay for good."

I don't know what to say so I just smiled.

But I know what she mean to say.

Before I had a chance to speak and say goodbye, she grabbed my hand, with shopping bags on the other, walk towards the door and tell me that we should get something to eat and wink.

Gosh, the signature wink that makes everyone's heart melt. I so know that gesture.

Settled on the cafe that happens to be my favorite place to hang out and kill time lately.

Without looking at the menu she made our order.

"Iced Black English Breakfast tea and mango smoothie for her." pointing at me.

"Change that to Irish cream coffee" I told the server and add some of your best seller cake. He nodded and left.

"Since when you learned to say no to mango smoothie?" she asked with confused look on her face but smiling and trying to catch my eyes.

I know that look. I've seen that years ago. But tried to shake it off.

"People change like you always say before" I said on a cold voice.

I don't know where did I get the courage. I've been trying to burry this hatred in my heart. I know that I will never see her again after the night she walk out of my life. How she said the words and left a fear and pain in my heart for the longest time.

*********

It's the last summer vacation of being a student. Next year, I'll be busy with interneship then a corporate slave. Perhaps, I have to make sure that this will be our best summer.

I always want to go to the beach. Its calming and romantic. And this is our favorite place. She love this place so much and she is happy whenever we were here.

Tonight, I'll ask Elaine to be my girl. Everything is perfect. I have prepared a blanket and some snacks. She love picnics at the evening and also sunset. What a weirdo but I want her to be my weirdo.

She came on her white halter dress. So elegant and beautiful but with the looks on her face, I know there is something wrong.

I'm always confident and courageous. I didn't hesitate to ask her. "Hey, you okay?"

She give me a loud sigh, looked me at the eye and let go her train of thoughts.

"This is not right."

"We should stop."

"I'm just a phase."

"You're just bored."

"Don't want this, us"

I don't understand but I can not breathe because of what she just said. Puzzled and I don't know what to say she grabbed my hands and kissed them.

"George, you are the smartes one in our class and I know that you can understand me" she said, teary eyed.

"I know... its for the better... we should stop this. I'm sorry" and just like that she turned her back and walked away from me.

********

The scent of Irish cream coffee brings me back to the present. Sitting on awkward silence. I just want to finish my drink and go home. There's nothing left with us. But then, she reached out and hold my hand and didn't care if everyone in the cafe is looking.

"I'm sorry, if I was not brave enough to do this before." she said on a shakey voice.

"All this years, I always think of you. I know, I've hurt you and I don't deserve to be with you. You were brave, smart, funny, and willing to stay by my side no matter what. But I can not do the same. I thought the you are better for someone else." she added

Surprised with her revelation but I can feel the same pain years back. "So you just choose to hurt me, and now you are telling me this?" I said on dry voice

She squeezed my hand lightly and said "Im so afraid of what other people would say. I came from a well known religious family".

So its all about what people would say I clarify to my self. The she cut me before I can say anything.

I'm so lost then but I don't want to hide anymore. The day I told you that we should stop is the same day I have realized that I still want you in my life.

I came out to my parents and told them that I like someone, that's why they sent me away. They changed my number, my social media, and email. I tried writing you a letter but didn't have the courage to mail it"

I'm in shock and let her speak. I know my voice will betray me if I will say a single word.

She pulled out a memory stick from her bag and give it to me. "I always bring this with me. I know I will meet you again, on the most unexpected time. All those letters that I was not able to send you, were all in there. My feelings for you."

She grabbed my hand and kissed it. "George, you are the best thing that ever happened in my life."

The ice in my soul are slowly melting. I took the memory stick. Maybe all the answers to my question are in here. At lease I'll get some peace of mind.

We stayed like that for I don't know how long. But I know I'm not yet ready to accept her in my life again.

"Elaine, you are sweet, and I admire you for being courageous to stand for your self. I've been carrying this burden for the longest time. I don't know what happen to us. Thank you for giving me some peace of mind."

She gave me a thin smile but it went out with the next thing I've said.

I will always care and love you but I can't afford to be hurt now. Things have changed. Maybe you have realized things and so do I.

We can't be together. You've made your decision and I respect that.

Then I grab my stuff, kissed her on the forehead and went out of the cafe.

Then, I never looked back.

=============================

Inspired by real events. Name of characters were changed for their protection.

REVISED AND PUBLISHED: MARCH 2020