#there's an au somewhere where she doesn't lose her boys horribly

[dreamedfyre-a]

i'm thinking so much about hel and her children today for some reason. how she was way too young to be a mother and quite frankly relied entirely on the servants and ladies and her mother at first, and how she would have struggled with not knowing how to be a mother when she wasn't even an adult, and how her sensory sensitivities (especially when it comes to sound and touch) would make it harder to deal with her children, and how easily overwhelmed she would be

but also how she loves and cares for them and keeps them close most of the time. she's with them so often even though strictly speaking she didn't have to be. but she loves them and she wants them close, whether they're playing indoors or she's taking them to dreamfyre (rip to anyone who tried to say 'but it's dangerous' she trusts dreamfyre with her life and with her children's lives too)

when her little prince is born, it's a lot easier. she's older (young, still, but even so) and she has experience, it's also one (1) baby instead of two. she's a little less terrified overall. he's the one she spends the most time with since he was very little