#there’s something so compelling about soda claiming a baby that wasn’t his

[sodapopper]

what do you think about Sandy?

I always imagined Sandy as something of a “girl-next-door” kind of person, not as wild as Sylvia or as stable as Evie, but oh so sweet. A flighty, smiley little thing, swears too much, smokes too much, flinches at raised voices, with bright, wary eyes.

They’re sickening, those two, Soda and Sandy, one of a kind—too much sweetness spilling out between them like candy melting from the heat. Soda is tough, and reckless, and good in a fight, but that girl turns him giggly, all sunshine. Sandy is a wildcat, quick to jump, quick to run, but that boy turns her bashful, all doe.

He loves her as much as he loves anything, with his entire heart—scraping out his chest cavity to give her as much as he can, pouring and pouring and pouring until she might drown in all the love. Even then, he gives more.

They’re sixteen. He wants to marry her. They’re sixteen. He’s gonna save her from her family. They’re sixteen. He’s in love. She’s the one for him, the only one, and he’ll do anything for her, he’ll die for her, he’ll devote himself to her, he loves her he loves her he loves her.

Maybe in the end, that’s why she did it. Soda loved her too much, and not in the way she thought she deserved. When that soc boy came around, calling her names and treating her like the trash beneath his feet, she thought finally, someone who saw what she really was.

Maybe that’s why she did it. As much love as Soda had to give, it would never fill the void of how little she had for herself.

Maybe that’s why she did it. In the end, Sodapop Curtis was shining, magnetic, too much, and she was not enough.

Maybe that’s why Sandy did it.

In the end, she was just a scared girl born on the wrong side of the tracks.

I’m not inclined to villainize her—she’s a kid, just like the rest of them. But I have no loyalty to Sandy, so I don’t have much interest in defending her, either. She’s a kid. She’s troubled, she’s complicated, she’s lost. She made a choice that hurt him, and ultimately, herself. In the end, I don’t know why she did it. But wherever she went after Tulsa, whoever she became, I hope she found happiness and healing.

I know Soda hoped that, too.