#there’s aspects of retail I’m happy to be done with but at least I knew how to play the game with retail

[neofelis----nebulosa]

Ugh I accepted a job and I’m starting to have second thoughts

[constance-emmeline]

The Eighth Chapter (of eight): The Maid arrives

Tabatha accompanied Chantelle to introduce her to the Marchioness before returning directly to London for an important social engagement in Belgravia, from which she hoped to glean ‘intelligence’ and other gossip of mutual interest to her and the Marchioness. The Marchioness therefore accepted Tabatha’s apologies that she could not stay in the shires at least a little longer: “See you soon, Tabs!”

“Good morning Your Grace, I’m Chantelle” said the young lady, offering her right hand palm downwards in the manner Tabatha had explained was required. Tabatha had also managed every other conceivable need to effect this important introduction and enable a long term relationship to flourish, especially in the wardrobe department – which, catering for a young lady with such correct dress sense had been nothing but a pleasure for both of them over several days shopping in some of London’s most expensive retail stores and finest specialist lingerie boutiques.

The Marchioness was stunned.

Astonished and delighted by the manner of this lovely young lady, at how the reality of her actual person exceeded the expectations which Tabatha had set so carefully!

There was also another aspect to this introduction which the Marchioness knew Tabatha had withheld from her and which she would take up with Tabatha later, as much as Tabatha knew this was true and knew the Marchioness would corner her soon, swear at her and she would swear back and then they would both laugh and call one another offensive names like ‘tart’ and ‘whore’ just like they’d always done since private school and always would. ‘What a carry on!’ both women knew.

This aspect was that Chantelle spoke with a slight, but discernible lisp which Tabatha knew the Marchioness would find incredibly sexually attractive. When at private school and later at finishing school, Tabatha used to relentlessly tease Felicity and continue to really turn her on by lisping to her. Indeed, if she could approach Felicity unawares and speak thus she would be able to get her fucked in just minutes, so powerful was this fetish of Felicity’s.

So now, as she absorbed the visual impact that this fair haired blue eyed young woman made on her and observed how beautifully dressed in her black silk dress and pure white lace trimmed pinafore she was and wondered what delights in lingerie were concealed with such propriety beneath that dress, the Marchioness felt her vulva moistening in response to this angel’s vocal tones.

Fuck Tabatha for compromising me like this, the Marchioness thought, what an outstanding bitch! She amazes me with what she does and right now I’m going to struggle to keep my act together and not go all ‘gooey’ and soft and silly! I’ll give her a big kiss for this!

The Marchioness was a class act, though … feminine … strong … powerful … used to having to cope with the unexpected, taught so well in that at school. She coped … beautifully and magnificently … her brown and hazel eyes looked deep into those sky blue and they connected their very souls – instantly. A moment later those same nervous systems mobilised a smile: from the Marchioness, so warm, welcoming and friendly … compassionate; and from Chantelle a smile that spoke of understanding, respect, compliance and a desire to help … for the good of all.

“Hello and welcome Chantelle. I’m Felicity. I also answer to Lissy. I’m delighted to meet you and I hope you will be very happy here.”

“Your Grace” responded Chantelle in exactly the right manner, unaware as yet at how her lisp affected the Marchioness so powerfully.

“Tabatha, thank you for looking after Chantelle and bringing her here, safe journey back to London, my dear.”

“Your Grace” said Tabatha. They embraced and each kissed both the other’s cheeks.

“Safe journey, Tabs! Take care! Speak soon!” said the Marchioness.

Tabatha left, delighted with the outcome of her efforts thus far.

The Marchioness turned towards Chantelle. “This is, frankly a very large estate as I think you know, Chantelle. It needs a good team to run it. I’ll leave you to introduce yourself to them over the coming days and develop your own understanding of how this place ticks. Interested to hear your thoughts in due course. For now, it’s a nice sunny day, so why don’t I show you round the paved areas of the grounds, see some of the views across to Wales and we can then sit and talk more generally in my private garden.”

“Thank you, Your Grace” replied Chantelle.

Away from the windows of the main house as they walked and the Marchioness talked generally about the history and grounds of the estate, the Marchioness was surprised and delighted to feel Chantelle take the upper inside of her right arm. It felt so natural and just the right thing for Chantelle to have done! How lovely. They walked on, Chantelle listening, absorbing what the Marchioness was saying.

Both women started to feel a sense of well-being, of peace, of being comfortable together. Each felt entirely happy and the Marchioness was feeling increasingly pleased by the refreshingly cool sensation caused by the moisture being absorbed by the cotton gusset of her knickers from her vulva.

They entered the Marchioness’ private garden and disappeared from any view, Chantelle remaining on the Marchioness’ arm. The Marchioness indicated Chantelle should sit down next to her on her right in a quiet and sheltered sun spot which was a favourite place for her to come when she wished to have some time in quiet reflection to ponder matters of estate management away from the main house.

“So Chantelle, what duties do you think my role entails? What do you think I am looking for or would like? What would you like to do?”

Chantelle having disengaged her hand as they sat down, now sat closer, in a way that again was not only natural but discreet. They sat now, shoulder to shoulder and Chantelle placed her left hand on the Marchioness’ right thigh, again in a way which seemed so appropriate and perhaps to be expected of her.

The Marchioness shuddered with pleasure. Whether Chantelle detected that shudder, the Marchioness could not discern, but she did know that Chantelle had noticed how smoothly the fabric of her dress moved relative to the petticoat beneath. The Marchioness felt her breasts starting to swell, the characteristic hardening of her nipples and her labia showing early signs of distention.

“Your Grace is a senior member of the English aristocracy” began Chantelle. “You have inherited immense wealth and have been well educated to prepare you for the significant and onerous responsibilities that inheritance has brought to you. You are widely known to be wise, kind and generous and I trust Your Grace will excuse me if I say you are also known to not be without fault, principally that you can become uncharacteristically cross if provoked at length and that you are not averse to using quite robust and colourful language under such circumstances, purely to help communicate your feelings and requirements, rather than offend anyone.”

Chantelle paused as if to allow the Marchioness sufficient time to process what she was saying, a very prescient action for such a young woman to know she should take.

“Please continue” invited the Marchioness, allowing her right shoulder to rest a little more heavily on Chantelle’s left.

Unabashed and indeed encouraged, Chantelle continued. She stroked the Marchioness’ thigh as gently as the Marchioness had ever felt it stroked and the two women sat even closer still and more comfortably too.

“Your responsibilities come to you from time immemorial and will continue to pass on down the centuries to come. To do justice to those responsibilities for property and especially those who serve you, you need vision. Understanding. But you cannot implement that vision alone. As much as we who seek to serve you all need your powerful, seemingly unconditional patronage, then we, the commoners whether prosperous or poor need your support; not charity although sadly that is a need in the world we must all contribute to.

You are therefore responsible for creating, enabling and managing the work of others, helping them develop their careers, however humble they may seem to you and you are again widely known for embracing this need too. I know you spend at least half a day each quarter with each of your estate team here to talk to them, listen to them, look after them, understanding that this is the path to get the best from them and it is their best they want to give to you. You understand that, but that’s not the only reason you are so generous. It’s because it is what you wish to do, because you are so kind.”

The Marchioness felt quite touched and humbled by the wise words of this dignified, quiet young woman. Her message was becoming more important than her lisp and for the time being, at least the Marchioness allowed the lisp to dissipate away from her consciousness. Gently, indeed tenderly and certainly respectfully, the Marchioness placed her right hand on Chantelle’s left and invited her to please continue once more.

“My role in this is that while your Maid, Amanda is away with the Countess … Tish I think? … on honeymoon I am acting as Assistant Maid to continue to make sure your immediate day to day needs are met. I understand from Tabatha, who has been so kind to me that most cleaning and such like domestic work is done by your housekeeping team – but I would expect to make sure that your surroundings are clean and tidy. Things like your cosmetics and personal things are where you expect them to be and Tabatha said you would probably like me to help you decide what dress you would like to choose to wear each day. I would so love to help you with things like that!

On a practical note, if you are thinking about something and you’d like a cup of tea or some refreshments then were you to prepare those for yourself, that train of thought could well be lost and none of us would know what would have happened instead if your thoughts had not been lost and you’d decided something, a course of action. So I should provide that tea and those refreshments. Evening meal is provided by housekeeping, I know. But I expect to provide that tea and those things when you need them so that you don’t have to distract yourself or waste your time having to ask for them. You rightly expect your bathroom to be supplied with soap, towels and tissue – which housekeeping do, I know – but I will keep an eye on that and would check through after your every use.

I know that Amanda is already a legend across the peerage and I’ll struggle to meet her platinum standard I know … but perhaps Your Grace would be happy with a gold standard for this short while? And when you have welcomed Her Ladyship (as she now is by marriage) Amanda back and I have had the privilege to meet her, I understand that you, that is to say Her Ladyship the Countess Letitia have a requirement for a Maid for her, which I might fill … I would love to fill. I will also have to make sure you address Amanda correctly, Your Grace! She’s “Her Ladyship” to us all, now!

I have talked so much Your Grace … I just would like to say ‘Thank you’ for the opportunity you have offered me here and I promise you won’t be disappointed.”

“I am very touched by what you’ve said, Chantelle. You are quite right, on every level. And yes! I am indeed reminded that I must address my Maid as ‘Your Ladyship’ … I think that’s so lovely … very unusual indeed, actually if you think about it … unprecedented in the peerage, perhaps? But also as ‘Amanda’ when it’s just we two.”

“Your Grace” replied Chantelle.

They sat a few moments longer. The Marchioness stroked Chantelle’s hand. They both looked at one another, becoming soul mates now, in such short a time!

“Come walk with me, Chantelle?” asked the Marchioness. “Please take my hand?”

They walked hand in hand through the garden, relaxed now, both at ease but as much as that remembering the ‘pecking order’ here! They discussed the planting, the Marchioness impressed by Chantelle’s knowledge of the subject.

The Marchioness then felt she could ask Chantelle a question?

“Of course” lisped Chantelle.

“Chantelle, suppose you are at a party, in the hearing of others. You don’t know your petticoat is showing, or indeed it may be your wish that it does … or that you grant a fleeting glimpse of it from time to time. Someone … could be a person of either gender … informs you, quietly or otherwise that your slip is showing. How would you respond? What might you say or do?”

“Oh Your Grace! Isn’t that one of our worst nightmares? Something we ladies all try to avoid at all costs! Well, in public, anyway. I was quite comfortable to wear a second longer slip at Auntie Edith’s which showed beneath my dresses when we were both relaxing at home. She’d whisper to me: ‘It’s snowing down south, Chantelle!’ … such a lovely, tactful way of putting it, don’t you think? But I must address your question!

At finishing school, we were taught deportment. I’m sure you were too. It’s so important for a lady like you to understand and a girl like me to know! We were asked, challenged with this question by our tutor who divided us up into small groups to draft a suggested response we could all memorise and take away to use … or should I say, hopefully not use!

My group of four came up with: ‘Oh, I’m so sorry! I had no idea! Thank you for letting me know.’”

“Chantelle, that is brilliant! That’s the most wonderful, sweetest way I’ve ever heard how to tell some ‘busybody’ or bloody creep to ‘Fuck Off!’ without them being able to complain in any way about your language and indeed compelling them to do exactly that! Thank you indeed! Please may I adopt that expression, should I ever need to use it, heaven forbid?! And please may I inform others of it?”

“Your Grace” said Chantelle.

Time then to return to the house and as they prepared to leave the garden, the Marchioness turned to face Chantelle and seek her other hand. It was given so immediately, with no apparent hesitation, so compliantly. So soft, but so strong, Chantelle’s hands, the Marchioness could tell.

They smiled. “May I please, Chantelle?” asked the Marchioness, leaning forwards almost imperceptibly to enable any misunderstanding or misreading to be overcome or corrected relatively easily without undue embarrassment for either party to offer a kiss to Chantelle’s right hand cheek with more nervousness and trepidation than she’d ever known in in making an amorous approach to another lady.

“Your Grace should not be shy” offered Chantelle quietly. As she did, she inclined her right cheek upwards to offer the Marchioness the perfect first kiss! It was perfect too, the softness of the lips upon the softness of the cheek. And then the left cheek. Perfection again.

“Chantelle” said the Marchioness, tenderly.

“Your Grace” said Chantelle quietly.

“You should be offering me afternoon tea around now, Chantelle” smiled the Marchioness.

“Indeed, Your Grace! May I?”

Chantelle took the Marchioness’ arm and they returned to the main house and to the Marchioness’ private suite … which takes us neatly back to “The First Chapter” of this story.

With so many themes involving love and lesbian sex having been addressed by these two stories, it only remains for me to say:

 The Countess married Amanda, the Marchioness’ Maid.

 The Marchioness married Chantelle, the Countess’ Maid.

 Tabatha married Elaine, her accountant.

 None of the above ever had a sexual relationship again with anyone other than their spouse.

 These marriage ceremonies all took place at the estate church.

 Lissy joked with Tabs that it was the first time a ‘commoner’ had married in her church for over one-hundred and fifty years. They both laughed. Tabs told Lissy she was ‘a fucking snob’ and Lissy reminded Tabs she was ‘a complete tart’ and ‘a whore’ as she would throughout both their lives. Frequently. They laughed again.

 The Marchioness gifted ‘Gamekeepers Cottage’ to Tabatha and Elaine as a wedding present.

 Chantelle reported back to Lissy, the Marchioness that no one of such title that demanded the address ‘Your Ladyship’ had been in service on the estate since the thirteenth century. She also pointed out that since her own elevation to Marchioness upon their marriage and her appointment as the Countess’ Maid that no one had ever been obliged to address someone in their service with a more senior form of address than they commanded themselves – and that furthermore, this was not just true of this estate, but throughout England.

***THE END*** Please note: As previously advised in an earlier ‘blog’ on this page: All my own and original work, no resemblance to any individuals or their circumstances is intended, all imagery understood to be free of copyright.

[zelenacat]

When We Were Young- Chapter 7- An Obitine Story

Four days later, the throne room of the Sundari Summer Palace was filled to the brim with decorum. Mandalore had many clans, but when referring to “the clans” in noble presence, one meant the High Clans that had governed the Mandalore System for over a millenia. Satine could see the set up in her mind. The throne room was long, and she would be seated at the head. In front of her, there would be eight thrones in two columns. One chair for each clan. Currently, the duchess of Mandalore was waiting behind a set of curtains, watching as the front doors were opened. A barrage of guards led eight Mandalorian leaders dressed in their finest into the room.

Fesma and Khaami came up beside her and Satine snuck down in front of the back door.

“Her Grace, the Duchess Satine Kryze of Mandalore, Second of her Name and Lady Krewella, accompanied by the Lady Fesma and the Lady Khaami.”

Satine could hear her footsteps as she entered the throne room and sat on her grand chair, all eyes were on her, not all of them warm. One man stepped forward.

“His Excellency, the Count Kyrel Awuad, head of Clan Awuad,” the announcer told the room.

“Your Grace.” bowed Count Awuad.

“Thank you for coming, Your Excellency,” Satine put on her best smile and gestured, “please take a seat.”

Next, a woman stepped forward.

“Her Excellency, the Countess Shewa Bralor, head of Clan Bralor.”

“Your Grace.” she curtsied.

“It is an honor to have you, Countess Bralor,” Satine straightened, “I hope I can be of much help to you and your kind.”

After a polite nod, she sat down.

“Her Excellency, the Countess Yara Eldar, head of Clan Eldar.”

Countess Yara stepped forward and showed her respect to the Duchess.

“I am grateful to have an audience with Your Grace.” she stated.

“Your kindness is most revered, Your Excellency.” Satine replied.

A man stepped forward.

“His Excellency, the Count Raren Mudhorn, head of Clan Mudhorn.”

“Clan Mudhorn thanks you, Your Grace, for your generosity towards our needs.” bowed the count.

“I am most happy to oblige, Your Excellency.” Satine responded politely.

“His Excellency, the Count Obren Rook, head of Clan Rook.”

Obren Rook gave an impressive bow.

“Your Grace is most magnificent in your eloquence and indulgence.”

Satine almost giggled at the compliment.

“Well, I hope I can live up to your standards, Your Excellency.”

A woman stepped forward and curtsied.

“Her Excellency, the Countess Aara Saxon, head of Clan Saxon.”

“It is a blessing to be in Your Grace’s presence.” said she.

“I hope to do good by your people, Countess.” Satine replied.

The next man was someone the Duchess recognized.

“His Excellency, the Count Tarrei Vizsla, head of Clan Vizsla.”

The Count stood with a tight-lipped smile, “It is quite the opportunity to have the chance to discuss policy with Mandalore’s She-Wolf.”

“I only hope I can hold up to the name, Your Excellency.” the Duchess responded.

The final clan leader was the youngest of the bunch, slightly older than Satine herself.

“Her Excellency, the Countess Ursa Wren, head of Clan Wren.”

Ursa curtsied, “The palace is resplendent, Your Grace, as always.”

“Thank you, Your Excellency,” Satine gestured to the remaining seat, “you are very obliging.”

Once Countess Wren took her seat, the Duchess spoke.

“I have invited you here today to discuss the implementation of the government programs that are improving our society,” Satine clasped her hands, trying not to fiddle, “please tell me whether or not they have been effective, and if there is anything else this government can do to help its people.”

Some of the clan leaders looked at each other and raised their eyebrows, but Ursa Wren stood, unafraid.

“There is the beginning of a food shortage in my province,” she stated, “many are robbing grain or threatening for fruit.”

Satine snapped and Fesma handed her a notebook.

“Is anyone else having this problem?” the Duchess questioned.

The Countess Saxon and Count Awuad stated they were.

“Perhaps an incentive, such as federal funding, would be appreciated by these farmers.” Satine suggested.

“And what of the aggression?” asked Countess Saxon.

“Outlandish fines or jail time could be prescribed as punishment for robbery,” the Duchess suggested, “and we could deploy a quarter of the national guard to be of assistance in your provinces.”

“That would be very helpful, Your Grace,” Count Awaud nodded, “is there any way we could implement a ration system with what we currently have?”

“A favorable solution indeed I think,” Satine scribbled down notes to herself, “we must have enough food to free our people.”

Some of the nobility shared glances, only Count Vizsla seemed unimpressed.

“My province is struggling with gangs, Your Grace,” Count Rook confessed, “we have tried incentives to de escalate violence, but matters have not subsided.”

“We should put their skills to use,” the Duchess decided, “perhaps offering jobs in the national guard would be beneficial?”

“We’ve tried to interest them in civil society, Your Grace,” Count Mudhorn interjected, “at least we’ve done so in my province, but many of these former warriors long for blood.”

The Duchess grew pensive.

“There has been some talk among my advisors,” she said suddenly, “that we should consider sending the most vile of our former warriors to Concordia, in exile.”

Count Vizsla’s face grew dark, and the Duchess addressed the second part of her comment to him.

“I suggest we take this route with only the most repulsive, that after offering them jobs in the national guard or public sport, should they decline, then they shall be sent to our most distant moon.”

The clan leaders agreed that this would be the kindest route to take, and Satine scribbled down her notes.

“What about our troubles with trash disposal and sewage,” asked the Countess Bralor, “I know it’s hardly a polite topic, but it must be discussed.”

“I agree,” Countess Eldar stated, “we have been having some trouble with this in my province as well.”

“The transportation aspect?” Satine questioned to clarify.

“Yes, Your Grace,” Countess Bralor answered, “the plants were not destroyed during the war, but they were abandoned.”

The Duchess nodded, “Would a government funded program be of assistance in this sense?”

“What exactly would this program entail?” Countess Eldar asked.

“Construction training and researchers,” Satine answered, “to help reinstate the process with those able to help improve the system.”

The Countesses actually smiled, and after a brief look, Countess Bralor answered.

“Yes, Your Grace, that would be most kind.”

For the first time, Count Vizsla spoke, “Are you sure these goals are reasonable, Your Grace?”

“Yes,” Satine said with resolve, “just as certainly as the restoration of our System is reasonable.”

Silence flooded the hall.

“Your Grace,” Countess Wren spoke up suddenly, “there has been a mutant of an old disease found in my province, how shall we begin to combat this?”

At this, Satine actually smiled, “Naboo and Cerea have been kind enough to loan us credits for the construction on schools and hospitals. I will tell the hospital committee to begin work in your province, and begin recruiting doctors and scientists for caution.”

Countess Wren’s shoulders eased, “Thank you, Your Grace.”

Satine scribbled down the remainder of her notes and addressed the congregation one more time.

“If that is all, do know that my chefs have prepared an exquisite luncheon, but I know there is much to attend to, and you are under no obligation to stay if business bides you leave.”

Count Vizsla said he was honored, but he had a meeting with the governor of Concordia later this afternoon. Count Rook and Count Mudhorn also politely declined, citing former engagements as well, but the Countess Saxon said she would be glad to know her Duchess better. Countess Eldar decided to stay as well, as did Countess Bralor. Count Awaud apologized, saying that he had a former engagement with the Prime Minister. Countess Wren decided to stay.

Lunch was onion soup, an ancient Mandalorian delicacy, and the Countesses seemed pleased. Satine sat at the head of the table, with Countess Bralor and Saxon on either side of her. Fesma and Khaami were in between them and the other Countesses. It was a quiet lunch, with topics never straying from polite manners and gentle society. Everyone was friendly enough, but Satinie felt she’d accomplished almost nothing by adding the lunch. That was until, Countess Bralor commented on her respect for the Duchess, saying that she conducted herself with an air of grace native to her clan.

“You are most kind, Your Excellency,” Satine actually blushed, “I truly hope I can emulate the traits of a great Duchess.”

“You certainly are far ahead for one so young.” commented Countess Eldar.

“You flatter me, Countess,” Satine smiled, “I owe much of my success to the people around me.”

The chatter resumed, but the Duchess felt a warm glow in her chest for the rest of the meal. The Countesses Saxon and Eldar left together, claiming retail therapy as they’re goal. Countess Bralor, being the older woman she was, went in search of a nap. Fesma began clearing the table.

“I hope you don’t mind, My Lady,” Countess Wren put her hand on Khaami’s arm, “but could you show me to the fresher?”

“I’ll take you,” Satine stood, “Khaami, help Fesma.”

Countess Wren blushed, “I don’t mean to be any trouble, Your Grace.”

“Nonesene,” the Duchess gestured, “I’m heading in that direction anyway.”

On the way to the fresher, Satine noticed the Countess’ strained face and stiff movements. She was going to ask if Her Excellency was well, but she knew that to be a silly question.

“Behind the mirror,” the Duchess whispered as they approached the fresher, “you’ll find what you need.”

Countess Wren nodded, “Thank you, Your Grace.”

Satine was about to leave, deciding against waiting for the Countess outside her door, when she heard a terrible wail from inside.

“Your Excellency?”

“I,” she gasped, “I’m sorry, your Grace, I, I think I need a maid.”

Satine pressed her comm and called for Fesma.

“Is there anything I can help you with?” Satine blurbed before she could stop herself.

“No,” the Countess' voice broke, “I just, I really thought it would happen this time.”

The Duchess was going to ask what would happen, but Fesma arrived, and when she opened the door, Satine saw a bloody crime scene.

Satine pressed her comm just as the door closed, “Khaami, I need you, get a maid to clean up.”

“Let’s get you cleaned up.” Fesma said sadly.

“I prayed so hard,” Countess Wren sobbed, “yet every month it’s the same.”

Satine’s eyes widened, and immediately she felt sorry for Ursa Wren. The Countess obviously needed heirs, and not everyone was as fortunate, or unfortunate, as she had been.

Khaami peeked her head around the corner, “Satine?”

“Prepare my parlor,” the Duchess leveled her lady a look, “chocolate, cookies, and tea.”

Khaami nodded and left.

Satine knocked on the fresher door, “Fesma, how are things going?”

The Countess swallowed, “I’m going to be alright.”

Satine was silent for a moment, “Ursa, come upstairs with me, we’ll give you something to change into.”

“Your Grace-”

“I insist,” Satine said gently, “it’s only right.”

When Fesma and Ursa Wren emerged, Satine led the women through the servants’ halls and into her room.

“Fesma,” Satine turned, “pick out something comfortable for Ursa.”

The lady squeezed the Countess’ hand before going into the closet.

“Ursa,” the Duchess straightened, “there’s something I want to talk to about, something personal.”

The Countess tilted her head, “About you or me?”

“Both of us.” Satine answered.

After Ursa changed, the trio entered the Duchess’ personal parlor, where a cozy spread of food awaited them. Satine sat down on a couch and gestured for Ursa to sit across from her, Fesma and Khaami sat in the two remaining chairs.

Pushing down her nerves, Satine inhaled.

“Your Grace?”

“How badly do you want a child?”

Ursa blinked, shocked.

“I can make it happen,” Satine said earnestly, “I know of a baby that will need a home.”

It took the Countess a second, but her eyes eventually darted between the Duchess’ face and stomach.

“The doctor said I won’t have a baby without scientific assistance,” Ursa explained, “but I would be glad to help you, Satine.”

Tears sprung into the Duchess’ eyes, “Please stay as my personal companion, we’ll need time to work out the details.”

“You’re ladies know,” Ursa asked, “and are you okay with this?”

“We know.” Khaami assured.

“I can’t bring myself to terminate the child of the man I love,” Satine confessed, “but I can’t raise the child as my own.”

Ursa nodded, “I will send a message back to my husband telling him to come visit the capitol.”

“That will be helpful,” Fesma stated, “the Duchess doesn’t trust comms.”

“Neither would I in this situation.” Ursa smiled sadly.

Satine turned to Khaami, “Could you have a room near mine readied for Countess Wren?”

“Of course.” the lady stood.

Satine took a cookie, waiting for Khaami to close the door behind her, “You and your husband must understand that no one can know.”

“Naturally.” Ursa nodded.

“I would like you to help me with some of the procedures we’ll have to go through,” the Duchess leveled Ursa a look, “such as the financial assistance we’ll need for false DNA tests and birth certificates.”

The Countess’ eyes went wide.

“We keep the real documents hidden,” Fesma clarified, “the false ones go where the children do, you shall keep the document belonging to this child.”

Ursa nodded, “You are experienced.”

“Yes,” Satine frowned, “I am.”

Ursa was silent until Khaami returned.

“We should swear an oath.” the Countess stated finally.

“I agree.” the Duchess conferred, nodding to her ladies.

An oath on Mandalore was a very big deal, it was as ancient as swearing on the primitive holy books yet still practiced in value. The only difference is that the searing was done in the Mandalorian style, with blood. The swearing took place in Satine’s personal parlor two days later, with the Count and Countess Wren on one side, and the Duchess on the other. Khaami read from the ancient Mandalorian texts as Fesma lit the candles. Then, as Khaami kept reading, Fesma took a knife and slit all six palms of the oath swearers, who dropped blood into a metal bowl. 

“I, Satine Kryze, Duchess of Mandalore,” Satine began, “head of Clan Kryze, Second of my Name, and Lady Krewella, do so charge you with the care of my child.”

The Count and Countess knelt and placed their slit hands above their hearts. 

“I, Ursa Wren, Countess Wren, head of Clan Wren, do fully accept this responsibility,” Ursa stared into Satine’s eyes, “and swear my soul to secrecy.”

The Count Wren did the same, and then both drank from the bowl, then the Duchess did, and the oath was sealed.

“This oath is binding.” Khaami finished.

The room was quiet for a long time.

“Thank you, Satine,” Ursa swallowed, “thank you for making our dreams come true.”

As the months went by, Satine’s stomach grew under her corset, but the Duchess’ personal companion, the Countess Ursa Wren, stated that she noticed nothing strange. This time, Satine was prepared, at the first sign of contractions, she and Ursa headed down into the basement. 

“Khaami, Fesma,” Satine huffed into her comm, “it’s happening.”

A few minutes later, Satine’s ladies came with warm towels, pain relieving medication, water, and many many holo print papers to clean up the mess.

“Dear God,” Satine’s breathing became labored, and she leaned on Ursa behind her, “it didn’t happen this fast last time.”

Khaami turned on the droid and locked the door.

“Hello, I am Oiyo, how can I help you today?”

“My baby is coming,” Satine gasped, “hurry!”

“Are you a human female?” the droid asked.

Satine nodded and spread her legs, Fesma readied herself at the foot of the bed. A clicking noise whirred and the droid produced some strange tool. The Duchess shuddered.

“You’ll be alright, Satine,” Ursa whispered, “the droid knows what it’s doing.”

“Thank you for being here,” Satine looked around the room, “thank you all.”

Khaami smiled, “There’s no where we’d rather be.”

In response, the Duchess yelled.

“Now is the time to start pushing. Oiyo beeped.

Satine’s breaths came out in short puffs.

“Keep calm.” the droid advised.

Khaami took Satine’s free hand. Fesma and Oiyo shared a look.

“Push.” the lady told her mistress.

Satine did, screaming her lungs out.

“Squeeze my hand.” Khaami offered.

Satine did, a cry pierced the silence that followed.

“It’s half out, Satine,” Fesma stated urgently, “keep going!”

With a wail and balling her eyes out, the Duchess pushed.

“It’s a boy!”

Satine gasped and leaned into Ursa.

“A boy, Satine,” the Countess’ eyes watered, “you’ve given me a son.”

“What name did you decide on?” Khaami asked, taking the baby in her arms.

Satine and Ursa smiled at one another, “Tristan.”

“Tristan?”

“After the valiant knight of old,” Ursa explained, “and I like the way it sounds.”

The Duchess held her child first, and kissed him.

“Be good for your mother, Tristan,” Satine’s eyes watered, “she’s going to raise you, you know.”

“Oh, Satine.” “Be good for me as well,” Satine’s voice quivered, “be good for Mandalore.”

Then she handed the baby to Ursa, who stood up and began rocking Tristan.

“Can I have the birth certificate?” the Duchess asked.

Khaami handed her the paper.

Oiyo whirred, “Your son was born at three fifty-five on the second of Marsh.”

Name: Tristan Kryze  Date of Birth: 2, Marsh, 37 BBY  Birth Time: 3:55

Home Planet: Mandalore  Mother: Satine Kryze  Father: ___________________

As soon as she filled out the paper, Satine began to cry.

“Satine-”

“Take him and go, Ursa,” she sobbed, “take him and go!”

The Duchess buried her head into her knees, pain throbbing, nonetheless, she felt Ursa kiss her cheek.

“Thank you, Satine.”

Ten minutes after Ursa was gone, Satine was rocked with more pain.

“Please don’t let this happen again,” she begged, “no, please no.”

Immediately, Fesma turned Oiyo back on.

“Hello, I am-”

“Check if I’m having another baby!” Satine ordered.

The droid did.

“Your contractions are starting up again,” it stated, “yes. You are having another baby.”

Satine screamed, this time from anger.

“Are you alright in there?” a voice asked from outside.

The Duchess’ eyes went wide.

“Yes,” Fesma answered, “just need a little cooling off.”

“Oh,” the voice sounded unsure, “alright.”

Khaami passed Satine a towel as the footsteps receded, she stuck it in her mouth and wailed. Khaami then shoved towels under the door before climbing behind Satine to support her.

“This is happening quickly.” Fesma observed.

Satine felt it wasn’t happening fast enough. She shivered as another wave of pain racked her body. 

“Push now.” Oiyo beeped.

The Duchess didn’t need to be told twice, God, how she hated this. Twice now, nature had surprised her with double what she thought she was getting.

“I see the head, Satine,” Fesma said calmly, “please keep going.”

Two contractions later, the Duchess had given birth to her second daughter. Fesma announced this and wrapped the baby up in a towel, Khaami got ready to receive the birth certificate.

“What will you call her?” Khaami asked, picking up a pen.

Satine looked at her baby’s face, she had tufts of red hair and plush cheeks.

“Mara, after my ancestor, the first Queen.”

“Beautiful.” Fesma smiled.

As the Duchess fed her baby, a deep melancholy overwhelmed her.

“Tristan-”

“I know.” Fesma sighed.

“And this one-”

“I know.”

Exhaling loudly, the Duchess asked to see the birth certificate.

Name: Mara Kryze  Date of Birth: 2, Marsh, 37 BBY  Birth Time: 4:32

Home Planet: Mandalore  Mother: Satine Kryze  Father: ___________________

“Perfect.” she smiled sadly.

Khaami helped Satine upstairs while Fesma cleaned up, only this time, Parna was waiting in the Duchess’ bedroom.

Her eyes went wide when she saw Satine, “Your Grace?”

“You mustn’t tell anyone,” the Duchess growled, “or I will have you and your entire family exiled.”

Parna gaped, “Your Grace, I would never.”

With visible weariness, Satine sank into her bed, holding Mara in her arms.

“Khaami, will you bring-”

A strange sensation filled Satine, and she looked down, realizing with horror that she was floating. Her eyes fell to Mara’s outstretched fingers.

“Oh, Mara,” the Duchess’ eyes dripped, “please don’t let this be true.”

“I know someone, Your Grace,” Parna stated, “my brother knows a little of the force’s ways.”

Satine looked up.

“Of course,” Parna blushed, “he doesn’t use it for savory purposes.”

By the time Fesma returned, a plan had been laid out. Parna’s brother would come to visit her at the palace, and she would hand him the baby and a bag of jewels for false documents. This would all take place tomorrow, so Satine had a night with the baby. She spent most of that night on a holo call with Ursa.

“How-”

“He’s perfect,” Ursa answered with a smile, “everyone loves and thinks we adopted him. They believed the documents.”

“That’s good to hear.” Satine remarked.

“And,” Ursa paused, “you’re okay with this?”

“Yes,” the Duchess nodded, “and I had another baby.”

“What?”

“A girl,” Satine held Mara up to the camera, “Parna’s brother is going to take her.”

“The brother of a maid,” Ursa questioned, “why?”

“He can look after her,” Satine assured mostly herself, “Parna is going to take a few days off to see them settled.”

“Good.”

Satine swallowed, “Thank you again, Ursa.”

“Thank you, Satine,” Ursa lowered her head, “he’s truly a prince among Mandalorians.”

“That he is.”

[mochinek0]

“Normal”

The Agreste's Winter Ball was under way and only a select few were invited, of course with their plus one.

So many fashionable clients and business personnel held it in high regard. Security was tight and anyone who was anyone attended.

So, everyone wondered who let children attend.

As children of fashion's powerhouses: Adrien Agreste and Chloe Bourgeois were invited.

The first one to blame was Adrien. He had given a ticket to Nino, who brought Alya as his plus one.

Sabrina was given hers by Chloe and invited Alix as her plus one.

Lila was given her ticket by Gabriel and was told to be Adrien's plus one. She accepted knowing she had her prize in her reach.

Max was currently invested in an internship and was required to attend. He selected Kim as his plus one, hoping he'd cause a ruckus that would get him thrown out sooner or later, without endangering his position.

None of them knew how Marinette got a ticket.

Their eyes lingered on her as she walked in with a boy slightly older then her. He was tall, tan, dark haired, and had green eyes, but no one knew who he was.

"I bet she slept with him to get a ticket." murmured Lila, taking a sip of champagne. "Probably." answered Alya, in response.

Nino was beginning to question his relationship with Alya. She was amazing when they first started dating and had such big dreams, but now it seemed like all those things he had fallen in love with that made Alya….Alya, were shoved onto the back burner. She had done nothing but criticize Marinette, who he had known for years.

"Hey, Nino." whispered Alix, "Do you know who the stuffy guy with Mari is?" "No, but she looks happy." he whispered back.

The group watched as a businessman approached them and struck up a conversation.

"Woah, how did Marinette get Bruce Wayne to talk with her?" questioned Max, as Kim dragged him towards the buffet table. "Who?" asked Alix. "Bruce Wayne. He's the owner of Wayne Enterprises; they have their hand in everything!" exclaimed Max. "He probably went to talk with the brat who came in with Marinette." stated Alya. "You don't think they'll get thrown out, do you?" Lila asked, faking her concern. "Well, only one way to find out." Kim said, between bites, pointing towards Gabriel and Adrien Agreste, walking towards Bruce Wayne.

"Bruce Wayne, it's a pleasure to see you again." announced Gabriel. "Ah, Mr. Agreste. Thank you for inviting us." answered Bruce. "Yes, the invite was a most pleasant surprise." spoke the young man next to Bruce.

"Gabriel, allow me to introduce, my son, Damian Wayne, and his plus one, Marinette Dupain-Cheng." spoke Bruce. "Miss Dupain-Cheng, it's a pleasure to meet you again. I have heard only good things regarding your designs." Gabriel revealed. "Thank you, Mr. Agreste!" Marinette smiled.

"Hey, Marinette! I didn't know you would be here." spoke up, Adrien. "Hello, Adrien." she responded, "How has your modeling been going?" "Lila hasn't been making the shoots easy." he responded. "We work in conditions we don't like, Son." announced Gabriel, "But we work through them to progress." "It's okay, Adrien. I usually ignore those shoots. I never regarded anything past the clothes before, but Lila's presence, she doesn't know how to work the camera angels and it throws off the feeling of the apparel, in my opinion." smiled Mari.

"You would know best, Mari." stated Damian, "The Wayne Retail section is always on the look for new models and designers. Even we have been, selecting fewer and fewer from the Gabriel female line."

"I was unaware your son was following in your footsteps." replied Mr. Agreste, shooting Bruce a look, acknowledging his lack of feminine clothing in circulation. "He is, at least on the business aspect. I'm afraid he's only here in regards to Marinette and her love of fashion." spoke Bruce, "My other sons wished to remain in Gotham to keep the place running." "Is that so?" asked Gabriel, glancing towards his son, "How admirable. I'm afraid Adrien is only the face of the company. He lacks the cutthroat confidence needed in the line of fashion."

Bruce and Marinette noticed Adrien flinch at his father's ruthless word, basically calling him useless.

"Perhaps, but maybe his talent lies elsewhere." smiled Bruce, catching Adrien's eye of surprise.

"Perhaps. He does mostly take after Emilie." retorted Gabriel.

Damian's enhanced hearing picked up the sound of footsteps behind them, rushing towards them. Out of his peripheral, he saw one of the waiters charge at them with scissors, ready to strike, and Marinette was in the line of fire!

Quickly, he turned and side sweeped the waiter's legs, causing him to stumble and fall on the floor, dropping the scissors. Damian is on his back and has a knife to his throat as the scissor slide between his father's legs.

"Why did you just attempt an attack on my fiancée? " Damian shouted, digging the knife just a little deeper.

Suddenly the attention was drawn to their group, if it hadn't been already. Darted gazes, flickered between the young man holding a knife to the waiter's throat and his revealed fiancée.

The group all looked at Marinette's left hand to see, that sure enough, she was sporting a ring.

"Damian! Put the knife away!" shouted Bruce, breaking everyone out of their shock. "He attempted to attack her, Father! Are you suggesting we left him get away with this? He came after her with a pair of scissors!" Damian shouted back.

"Dami, it's okay." Marinette smiled, crouching down next to him and reaching out to touch his shoulder, "I'm fine. You protected me, right?"

Damian nodded and released his captured prey, as security rushed onto the scene.

"Son, how did you get a knife through the metal detectors?" they asked. "Polycarbonate pocket knife." he replied, as if it would explain everything. "Did you steal from Dick, again?" asked Bruce. "He shouldn't leave his things laying around!" replied Damian, slipping it back into his pocket.

Meanwhile, Gabriel is rethinking just how 'perfect' Damian is compared to his own son.

Lila glares as everyone is talking amongst themselves on how glad they are that Marinette was okay. They were on her side, not a minute ago. How could they have shifted their concentration so fast? Now, she had to play carefully. Marinette had acquired an overprotective man. He seemed ready to kill anyone who laid a hand on her.

Marinette's eyes flicker to the man behind Damian reaching into his coat. She notices the movement and yanks on Damian's arm, throwing him towards the floor. "DUCK!" Mari shouts.

She rushes at the secondary waiter and tackles him to the ground. Quickly, she gets him in a headlock, causing him to fire the gun off towards the ceiling in panic. As she hears the chamber click empty, she easily slips into a cradle hold. Everyone is stunned that the petite fiancée also took on an attacker. Security rushed back, arresting the accomplice.

Bruce sighed as someone is walked out for a second time.

'Why is it always my family that starts something or is somewhere in the middle of said drama? Why can't we be normal? Can't we have a normal outing for once?'

"Marinette, are you okay?" asked Adrien, reaching his hand out for hers, blushing red. Who could have imagined that sweet and innocent Marinette could be such a badass?

"I’m fine. Thank you, Adrien." Mari answered, reaching for Damian's extended hand. "That was reckless and stupid, Angel!" shouted Damian, pulling her up and into his arms. "You're only saying that cause you didn't realize they were there." she smirked. Damian pulled Marinette into a kiss and whispered, "Don't you ever scare me like that again."

"Oh my God, Gurl! Why didn't you tell me you could do that?" shouted Alya, rushing over, with the class not that far behind. "Who's this?" questioned Damian, pulling her just a little bit closer. "Alya Cesaire; I'm Marinette's best friend." the budding journalist smiled. "I've met her best friend. You're not her." he replied.

Alya looked at Mari to counter his claim. "He's not wrong." was the response she got.

'How could Mari say something like that? They were friends since she moved there; since her first day at College.'

"You've changed." Alya said with a glare. "I'm not the one that's changed, Alya. I've just stopped being a doormat to everyone's needs. I'm through being left out of everything." retaliated Mari. "We don't leave you out-" countered Alya. "When was the last time you came to my house or you called to hang out at the park?" questioned Marinette.

Alya found she couldn't remember. 'Had it really been that long?'

"So, what? This guys teaches you some fancy new moves and-" she stopped as a burst of laughter was heard. She turned to see Kim, Nino and Chloe laughing. 'What's going on?' "What's so funny?" she asked.

"Those aren't new." said Kim, between laughs. "Mari's always been like that." Nino answered, taking deep breaths." "She got suspended on the second day of primary for beating up Kim cause he stole her juice box." announced Chloe, wiping the tears from under her eyes."

"What?" she looked back to Marinette, who seemed unfazed by this becoming common knowledge.

On the other hand, Lila was feeling faint. This was who she had threatened? Marinette had never seen her as a threat. She was only humoring her.

"My Angel may wear pink, but it doesn't make her any less fierce." Damian spoke up, before sending the woman in his arms a small smile.

"How?" asked Alya, still confused.

"My parents." replied Marinette, rolling her eyes, "Papa was a pro wrestler in his teens and Maman is a black belt in several martial arts. She's been teaching me since I could walk."

Bruce sighed.

'Why isn't anyone in this family normal?'

"I apologize for my son and his fiancée creating a disturbance in your event, Mr. Agreste." spoke Bruce, snapping them out of their conversation. Marinette turned back, wide-eyed and began to apologize fore creating a scene. Damian, realizing this was someone who his Angel idolized, apologized as well.

"It's quite alright. You both defended yourselves, admirably. I will help with the investigation against you both. I apologize for not doing a better job with my security." stated Gabriel, "Now, Marinette, I believe you were telling me about the fashion line you were working on."

Damian smiled as his Angel began to glow with excitement and began to converse about her ongoing project.

"So, how did you meet Marinette?" asked Adrien. Damian turned to see Agreste's offspring. Marinette had told him about Adrien: how she use to have feelings for him, how she took his advice against outing the liar who plagued her, how she had come to realize he knew nothing of the outside world.

He was just a wide-eyed with wonder as she had stated. He had a child's view of the world.

"I met Marinette in Gotham, by accident. I heard a scream and was ready to help, but when I got there, Marinette had taken down three men my father's size. It was very…captivating. She turned to me with a fierce gaze and when she realized I was no threat, her eyes changed to these alluring sapphire gems. I met her several days later, again, and asked her to grab some coffee with me. Once my brother's found out, it didn't take that long for them to try and spar with her. She laid them flat and so far that has been the best day of my life. Soon we'll have many more days like that." Damian spoke, turning his gaze back to Mari.

Bruce shook his head at his son's idea of romance. He's not sure how the universe did it, but they found someone to match his son's tenacity and they were able to calm him down.

Damian glanced back to Adrien and found his eyes filled with amusement and wonder. "That sounds so wonderful! A real love story!" he whispered. "I assume you have a plus one, as well." Damian stated. "Unfortunately, my father forced me to bring Lila." Adrien pouted, "I don't see why; he has me glued to his side to remind everyone I'm the face of his brand."

"What do you like to do, Adrien?" interrupted Bruce. "I like playing the piano. I use to play with my mom all the time. I like videogames and science. Father prefers I spend my time learning Mandarin and fencing when I'm not modeling his clothes." Adrien said, glancing quickly in his Father's direction. "Perhaps, your Father and I can come to some sort of agreement. Excuse me." Bruce left the conversation, as quickly as he had entered.

"What just happened?" Adrien questioned, turning towards Damian. "I have a feeling we'll be seeing much more of each other, Agreste. I'll inform my brothers of your timed arrival. I'm sure they'll appreciate another player to take down." Damian spoke, sauntering off to his fiancee.

Adrien looked at the group confused, before Chloe latched onto his arm.

"So, are you going to spill the details?" Chloe asked. "Detail? Of what?" he asked. "Marinette, of course!" she claimed, dragging him towards the group.

"Yeah, who is Mari with?" asked Nino. "Is she really engaged?" asked Sabrina. "How long have they been together?" asked Max, "I can calculate their relationship standings before the wedding." "Where is he from?" asked Kim.

"Woah, I get it you have questions, but shouldn't you guys ask Mari?" Adrien questioned back. He noticed their faces riddled with guilt. "I doubt Marinette would hold a grudge against you all. She seems very happy with him and he talks the world about her." Adrien continued.

"Adrien." Gabriel spoke, clearly calling for him. "Excuse me." Adrien said, breaking away from the group, "Yes, Father?" "It has come to my attention that Wayne Enterprises and Gabriel could work on a collaboration of sorts." Gabriel continued, "In the summer, you will head to Gotham to work with the Wayne's and Miss. Dupain-Cheng, as an exclusive model for her fashion line. Bruce has told me that while his sons appreciate Marinette's clothing, none of them are model material. While you are there, Bruce and his sons will show you the aspects of running a successful company."

Adrien turned and faced the Waynes and Marinette, trying to reign in his smile. "Thank you for this wonderful opportunity. I will do my best to make you all proud." he said full of hope.

"Will I be accompanying Adrien to Gotham, Mr. Agreste?" interrupted Lila, earning several frowns. "No. It has come to my attention that your overall appearance is not liked for the Gabriel brand." Gabriel said, giving her his attention. "What?" she whispered in shock. "Natalie is sending your mother a list of modeling schools to look at. If she agrees and you pass your summer schooling, we will see how people feel towards your new look." "New look?" she questioned.

"Yes, models change their appearances frequently. It all depends on the designer who holds the contract." spoke out Damian, "In America, modeling is taken seriously. While you do have the body type for an American model, it is your presence in pictures that doesn't transcend the clothing. Your eyes are lack luster and your hairstyle is not very pleasing to the eye. You don't use your body in a way to show off the apparel. A mannequin could do a better job. Perhaps a cut or a new style may be in order. I believe you said she was reaching the age to pose for lingerie, Mr. Agreste?" "Yes. Ms. Rossi, is almost eighteen." he stated. "Perfect. Her hair is entirely childish. Most women in the industry have done away with their long hair. Takes too long to style in photoshoots or runways. Also, try to branch her out to makeup commercials. She is bilingual so she can be easily contracted to Italian companies; a perfect in for any Milan fashion show. Models can be given a new look entirely to revitalize their presence. It could be their hair color, maybe a new cut, some even go bald or they'll be stuck in a brand with no other work coming in. No model wants that." Damian continued.

Lila stared in shock at thought of changing her overall appearance. She prided herself on her Italian beauty.

Bruce smiled.

'Finally, a sense of normalcy in the Wayne household.'

"After all, my father has been with enough models to acknowledge poor taste." Damian commented.

'So close.'

[88thparallel]

Tim Canterbury: from smol adorable paper salesman to sexy CEO

He may still be at the paper company but he’s running the whole place now.

Annnnnd then my mind ran away with it in that AU way it does, and Tim became John because of course he did. So.

It’s All About Touch

Sherlock Holmes knew it was revolutionary, as the head of one of the world’s top media conglomerates, to decide to cease all paper distribution, but it was the right move. Printed books, magazines, and newspapers were going the way of the dinosaur -- e-ink readers and tablets and smartphones were the future. Device sales only continued to skyrocket, the proof was in the numbers. Tech companies rolling in cash, unable to churn out enough products to meet demand. It was arguably more eco-friendly; no trees farmed and processed, no expensive ink and toner, no electricity-sucking printers. It allowed faster distribution of materials than printing. It saved space, and eliminated layout, warehouse, and shipping costs, not to mention reclaiming cuts to retailers. Digital distribution was like pure profit.

He’d agreed to meet with the CEO of Wernham Hogg International over lunch as a matter of social etiquette, which he abhorred as boring and tedious. Mycroft insisted after such a long and cordial relationship, it was the least they could do to offer their paper supplier an explanation in person. Of course his brother couldn’t bother to take the meeting himself, but Sherlock was sure prepared points would make any arguments short-lived. With any luck they wouldn’t even make it to entrees before it the deed was done.

Yet he’d walked into the meeting with the CEO -- John Watson -- ready to do battle, and walked out with a piece of the very paper he claimed the world no longer needed, a piece that suddenly felt more important than any he’d ever held.

He worried the crisp edge between his thumb and forefinger, biting his lip as he traced the slashes of black with his eyes.

He’d expected a lot of things out of the CEO -- a man who’d somehow risen through the ranks of a failing paper company and turned it into an empire that now bordered on a monopoly. Werhnam Hogg had gone from simple paper sales to trade printing almost overnight, and distribution not long after. Books had been written extolling the brilliance of the man at the head of it all.

Sherlock was ready for the sharp intellect of a man who fought his way to the top, and was now ready to fight to stay there. 

What he hadn’t expected was the easy way they instantly got on from the moment their eyes met above their clasped hands. The cheeky grin that broke at the corner of Mister (”call me John”) Watson’s mouth, lighting up his eyes. How, despite the bespoke pinstripes and coordinated crimson tie and pocket square, the perfectly styled hair, he seemed like he’d be happier in a comfortable jumper and a pair of jeans. He laughed often and easily, and smiled twice as much, and when he spoke, his tone was casual and honest instead of the blustering professional façades Sherlock was so often presented with. 

They’d struck up a conversation right away, and Sherlock was shocked to find himself enjoying the first business lunch in his life. It was a shame they had to get down to brass tacks. He found himself captivated by his lunch companion, his eyes roaming over his kind eyes, sharp jawline, and the strong set of his shoulders.

John had listened to Sherlock intently as he presented his apologies and outlined his conglomerate’s plans to go digital. To sever their decade-long relationship with Wernham Hogg International, to break new ground and push consumers down a paperless path.

He’d been surprised to find John looking at him with the hint of a smile on his lips and mischief in his eyes by the end of his diatribe. After a moment, he shook his head. “That’s brilliant,” he remarked as the waiter cleared their plates. 

“Really?” 

“Of course it is, it’s innovative and cost-conscious and extraordinary.”

Sherlock narrowed his eyes. “But?”

John smiled. “But I think what you’re forgetting, Mister Holmes, is that some people are very ...  tactile.” He ran his index finger around the rim of his water glass slowly. Sherlock felt himself flush. John licked his lips. “Some people don’t mind waiting for a book they can touch ... that they can hold in their hands. The weight is comfortable to them. Some enjoy idly tracing the embossing on the cover as they read. They need the feel of slick magazine pages under their fingers, the smell of a freshly printed newspaper. They like to write their notes in the margins of a textbook or their answers to the crosswords on the back page. They need to claim it, to make it theirs.”

As if on cue, dessert was placed in front of them. 

John picked up his fork. “Take this tiramisu, for example. It might be nice to look at a high-quality photograph of it. But to truly enjoy it, I need to feel the way my fork cuts through the ladyfingers, taste the rich mascarpone and smell the espresso, feel the way the whipped cream melts on my tongue.”

He took a bite and hummed appreciatively, murmuring “delicious,” once he’d swallowed, and encouraged Sherlock to do the same. The cake was heavy and light at the same time and in all the right ways, deep flavors mixed with airy cake and silky custard.

“Reading is about more than just the words,” John continued, voice slow and smooth like honey. “Can you imagine a world where we ignored the importance of all but one of our senses? Especially the physical aspect. It just makes it all more real, and definitely more... fun, wouldn’t you say?”

“I --” Sherlock managed, but couldn’t seem to find the words to form a thought.

He shifted his arm to look at his watch and frowned. “I’m afraid I have to cut our meeting short,” he said, standing and straightening his jacket over his slim hips. “I’d like you to reconsider. Perhaps we can meet for lunch again when you’ve made a final decision.”

“Or,” John said, picking up the pen Sherlock had used to sign the bill and scribbling something on a small white slip of paper, which he then set beside Sherlock’s plate, “I’d be happy to go into more depth, if you need to experience it all for yourself.” 

He’d winked -- actually winked -- at Sherlock, and left.

Sherlock picked up the white slip. Digits were scrawled in black ink over heavy cardstock (linen finish), followed by It’s all about touch. I’d be happy to show you. ~ John

Idly, Sherlock placed another bite of tiramisu in his mouth resisting the urge to moan, slid the paper in his pocket, and left the restaurant in a hurry. He suddenly had an overwhelming drive to explore his own sense of touch, and rethink the importance of paper.

Thanks to @mandapanda8 for the quick beta ;) 

@fellshish @twelvebrightducks @holmezyan @steadymentalityengineer @asleepatlast @coopsbird @freethemfrom1895

[cheekbonesandheroism-blog]

A not so brief history of me:

So my suicidal thoughts are back with a vengeance, and I'm in that cycle of too scared to tell anyone about it, so it may be cathartic to type this out, or it'll just serve as my suicide note, and I'm not fussed which tbh. Here goes

So, born 1988, youngest of two, son to an abusive military father and an abused mother. Ate as a coping mechanism, and got fat. Fat to the point that it ruined my body, and when I entered school, an obvious target to those that would seek to ruin my mind.

Got to my teens, several suicide attempts and incidences of cutting, while staying outwardly the "happy kid".

Now here's where things vary from what I've told people I know: I didn't get thin because I got some "mystery illness" from a holiday to Cuba.

I developed an eating disorder.

It took me five years to get over. It was a cycle of looking at food, eating the tiniest bit, then vomiting more than what I surely ate. But I finally "normalised", I'd beaten it, and because I was thin, I thought I was happy.

At the tail end of that, I met a girl, we became friends, then we fell in love. Moved across country to be with her, left everything behind. Got married (in what was a bit of a shotgun wedding). Moved in together, got a minimum wage job in a nursing home as a carer. I struggled financially, but I was content in my job and my marriage.

Fast forward two years, the worst thing that could happen happened, and I'd resolved never to speak of this ever again, but if I'm going to die soon, fuck it.

Here goes

A female resident had taken a liking to me. I was stick thin at that point, and she outweighed me by at least 10 stone. I was on a night shift. She lured me into her room, and proceeded to try and rape me. Pulled at my clothes. Grabbed at my crotch. Tried to pin me down. I ran out of the room. And I didn't report it, I didn't tell anyone. I was embarrassed, ashamed, I felt disgusting.

The next day, I received a call from work's head office. The resident had accused me of trying to abuse her.

I just fell apart.

I was arrested, my previous co-workers formed their own opinions. Some believed me, knew me. The majority didn't. My wife did.

After roughly 10 months of waiting, DNA evidence proved that I had done no wrong, but it wasn't enough to prove my side either. The case was dropped. So I left it, I was just happy that after considering suicide yet again, I was free.

After about six months without a job, I finally got one at a large retail store.

Due to my recent experience I had changed. I barely spoke to colleagues or customers. I was withdrawn. I relished the task of pushing trolleys, as it got me out in the car park, away from everyone.

Then, slowly, over a matter of years, with the help of some amazing friends, I became my old self again. I was happy. People told me what I meant to them, they cared.

It didn't last.

I work with mostly female colleagues. My wife didn't have a job so she stayed at home, playing videogames, watching TV and speculating what I did at work all day. I had a few very friends, and they are like sisters to me, but my wife mistook that closeness for something else. Desire, I believe.

There were arguments, accusations, her two sisters (habitual bullies with a very controlling nature, had tried to control me and what I did in every aspect) fed the flames inside my wife's head. Then it got worse.

I had a best friend. We would do everything together, chat together, even once went to the theatre together. She was truly like the little sister I never had. And my wife had messaged her, accused her of "wanting" me, and me if "wanting" her. And then my wife's sisters messaged her too. We still tried to carry on the friendship, via a group chat (seemed "safer"). But that was not good enough, the flames in my wife's head burning ever higher. They messaged my best friend again, then it was done. She was friendly but distant at work, broke off all contact outside of work. She went travelling for a month, and I didn't hear from her until she came back to work.

Now, indeed, my friend is very attractive, beautiful, but believe it or not I never had "those" feelings for her. Firstly because her looking like her, and me looking like me, there would be no chance in hell she would ever have those feelings towards me. And secondly, we "hit it off" as friends almost immediately, and I would never do anything to ruin the friendship we built. As you can imagine she gets enough attention off guys as it is. So if like to think she'd appreciate having at least one friend who won't confess feelings and make shit awkward for her, as has happened more then a few times before. I care too deeply about her.

A few months passed, and me and my friend slowly began to chat again, just a little at a time, but it was never to be the same as it was.

During all this I became depressed again, unhappy in my marriage, and my wife and her family would endlessly torment me, to the point I attempted suicide again. And started cutting again. And started vomiting again.

It all came to a head early this year. A massive, one sided argument erupted. Started hitting me, threatening me with a knife. Her sister (we had moved in with my sister in law a few months back, against my will, to "save money", the irony being they got me into debt and bled me dry) threatened me, hit me.

I hurriedly packed a bag, and took off into the cold dark night.

I called a few friends, and was prepared to sleep in a park, before one of them got back to me, offered me a spare room.

I stayed with him and his pregnant wife (who I had known for a while too) for several months, helping them financially, trying to find a place to stay. Their family members started talking to them about me, insisting that I was "freeloading". They still remained my friends, and I had never gone there with a view to take advantage of their kindness, and again, as before, something broke between us. I continued to help them financially, helped them redecorate, make the house ready for their baby. Then I moved out, got a small flat by myself. With nothing but the clothes in my hastily packed suitcase. I needed to rebuild my life.

I came to a realisation: right from the second I was born to that moment, I had always had someone around me, always lived with someone. For the first time in my life, I was completely alone.

I wasn't made to be alone. I was trapped in my own head. No amount of TV or games could fill the massive depressive void in my head.

Over this time, I was chatting with my former best friend again, talking about this that and the other. I had come to rely on her to help distract me from my depression.

But I noticed that she treated me differently than our mutual friends. She would hug them, not me. She would compliment them, never me. She would let them know exactly why she was friends with them, why she liked them, but not me. Things were still broken between us.

And to this day, we still talk, and on the surface appear to be best friends again. But she doesn't realise that no amount of distraction is the same, means more to me, than validation. Than to be treated the same as our other friends. To be told why she keeps me around. Because the old depressive and anxious thoughts creep in. Is she just pretending to be friends with me out of a sense of obligation? Does she even still want to be friends with me? It seems pathetic (it probably is tbh), but her friendship is one of the few things I have left. And it just hurts, so fucking bad, that apparently we can never go back to the way things used to be, a year or so ago. After all this time, it breaks me every day, when she treats me different. I feel tainted. Toxic. Cursed.

And that brings us to now. Across this time the depression built and built, to the point where I honestly, more than anything, want to disappear, to die quietly and remove myself from everyone's life. Because I honestly think I would not be missed.

You have to understand, this isn't a cry for help. If anything it's a justification for any actions against myself I may take in the future.

If anyone sees this, and wants to know more, feel free to send me an ask. If I'm still around I'll do my best to answer it.

Look after eachother

Love Dan

[recentanimenews]

Crunchyroll Features' Favorite Anime of Fall 2018!

The Fall season, and 2018 anime with it, are finished. We’re looking at a lot of big anime titles wrapping around into 2019, so now is the perfect time for our editors to honor our favorites from this season before the Winter premieres begin. This was a huge season with a ton of big returning titles, so it was particularly hard selecting our Top 3 from the season. You can check out our top anime from summer season, see how our picks compare to our most anticipated titles, or scroll down and check out our favorites!

Peter Fobian

Fall 2018 was absolutely ridiculous. The season looked huge going into it with the shonen fighter RADIANT, returning giants JoJo AND SAO, and 2 mega hyped isekai in Goblin Slayer and Slime. Oh yeah, also a new TRIGGER anime. Then it got EVEN BIGGER with some unknown quantities turning into awesome favorites. We’re still riding the crest of this wave into Winter as so many of the top series are continuing, but the ones that are coming to an end this year really left an impression on me.

ZOMBIE LAND SAGA

This might be the single biggest anime dark horse that has emerged since I started following seasonal anime and that was kind of part of its design. Everything from the show to the promotion was masterfully orchestrated, with the studio giving away little more than the title and Mamoru Miyano’s gorgeous face leading into the season. The way this anime took both tourism and idol anime to the extreme with one of the best concepts and pretty meta. The writing was on point, the comedic timing was perfect, and it even had great emotional beats. I’m really hoping a few of those loose plot threads mean a season 2 because this anime could easily deliver more.

SSSS.GRIDMAN

I watched the first episode of this series back at Anime Expo 2018 and was extremely surprised at how serious it felt. Although it loosened up during the fight scenes, Gridman has to be TRIGGER’s most reserved project to date with some really great storyboards, character drama, and a slowburn mystery that are typically absent from their high-octane visual circuses. It even stuck the landing. This series wasn’t just good in its own right, but really proved TRIGGER is about to deliver in multiple styles of storytelling.

Golden Kamuy

There's never enough space to talk about all the good things in Golden Kamuy. The story is an amazing treasure hunt/survival game in a wonderfully articulated historical set piece of Hokkaido, Japan following the Russo-Japanese War. The characters are as adorable as they are psychotic. The mysteries just keep building up. The violence is magnificent. The food looks delicious. This manga has a the best bit of everything and continually shows new faces as the story develops. Hopefully the wait for more of the manga wont be too long.

Ricky Soberano

Woo! This fall season has been a chock full of great anime that varied from each other in many aspects so I ended up staying consistently caught up with almost everything that came out this season and shows that haven’t stopped going. Trying to pick three took many rounds of questioning from myself to the people that I care about and the conclusion was ‘Ricky loved everything.’ However I came up with my top three by only choosing the ones that made me 110% happy every single time I clicked to watch the latest episode.

Fairy Tail Final Season

  I’ve been a diehard Fairy Tail fan since the beginning (tattoo on my hip for proof) and frankly I’ve cried during every episode this season simply knowing that there will be no more of this amazing shonen that has saved my life more than once after this is done. This season exceeds expectations by not only doing a victory lap and bringing on almost every character that has ever shown up in the show but also by tying up every loose end, answering every burning question, and naturally showing every individual guild member’s badass power has gotten to a level so high up that one could barely fathom. Each episode has me screaming at the screen from the new insane revelation that they just revealed.

As Miss Beelzebub Likes It.

  I don’t usually watch cute anime. However watching Beelzebub be super encapsulated by the presence of fluffy things, show her an affinity for tasty snaccs, and captivation for adorable animals pulled me into a hug as warm as an alpaca sweater and I never want it to stop. The color palette of pastel glory has kept me in a happy mood all season and the stories told are ridiculous but make for a never ending sweet dream.

Run with the Wind

  This was a wild card for me since I may’ve ran track on high competitive levels but I don’t have a preference to sports anime. However the cast of 10’s journeys not only as runners but also as individuals take place with such high stakes on the line made it hard to not want to continue watching especially since the show did well to realistically show competitive running and the realistic sacrifices and training that goes behind it. With such high tension and drama circulating, I was truly on the edge of my seat the entirety of every single episode.

Nate Ming

Y'know, I thought I was gonna watch more JoJo… but I got my mom into JoJo over Christmas break, so that's gotta count for something. From retail hell to the frozen wilderness of Hokkaido to the sacred ring, my Fall 2018 season was full of emotional ups and downs… and I'm still screaming about that season finale for Golden Kamuy.

Skull-faced Bookseller Honda-san

All the built-up trauma from working retail and customer service for almost half my life came back in one huge wave with Skull-faced Bookseller Honda-san. No anime this season has made me laugh so hard I pulled a muscle (I'm not joking), and no anime this season has made me curl up in the fetal position remembering the insanity of working a Harry Potter book launch at Borders. But aside from all that, Honda-san himself is refreshingly positive and upbeat--work is work, it's tiring and frustrating, but if you love what you do and like sending customers home happy, it's all worth it in the end.

Golden Kamuy

The treacherous journey to find the stolen Ainu gold continued with a second season, bringing back our favorite characters while introducing plenty of new faces. Unexpected team-ups, shuffling of group rosters, and then pitting everybody against each other kept me watching every week, needing to know what was coming next--and that infuriating season finale means I'm absolutely tuning in for whenever season 3 starts airing.

Hinomaru Sumo

I keep joking that "no cowards allowed" is the tagline for this intense adaptation of the Weekly Jump manga, and it's a pretty fair assessment: characters may feel doubt and fear, they may question the decisions that led them to get into the ring, but there's nowhere to run in sumo, so finish the fight and worry about the details later. This show has so much heart, and I'm here to continue cheering for Hinomaru and team into 2019 as we head into its second cour.

Nicole Mejias

I gotta say, this fall season was STACKED with a whole bunch of great shows from start to finish! It was a season where my queue was at its fullest and trying to find time every week was actually a bit challenging to make sure I watched everything. There were so many shows that I ended up liking way more than I thought I would, so it was difficult to pick a top 3, and in some cases I feel my top 3 are mostly continuing from things I really enjoyed before, or last season; but that said, this was a tough season, and if I had more than 3 slots, I’d be in even more trouble picking!

Golden Kamuy

Golden Kamuy is a must-have on my list, and frankly should be on almost everyone's! I really had no idea what to expect from the series when I first heard about it, but whatever I thought it was, Golden Kamuy surprised me with it's amazing characters, fast and severe action, and its balance of comedy and suspense. As the second season draws to a close and some of the serious questions are about to be answered, I'll be waiting to see what's next for Sugimoto and Asirpa in the future. I probably would never get tired of this series, so I'm hoping we hear about a new season soon. Golden Kamuy is a series of feel almost anyone can enjoy, and I hope more people get sucked into it like I did!

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: Golden Wind

JoJo's is one of my favorite series of all, and when Golden Wind got announced I was extremely excited to see what was in store for me, since it was the JoJo part I knew the least about. Part 5 really does have a unique feel to it, from the mafia trappings to the unique and interesting Stand abilities, and now that things are really getting underway, I'm excited to see what's next! Giorno and the rest of the gang are quickly becoming one of my favorite collections of JoJo heroes, with their mix of fun chemistry and personalities, and I can just see Part 5 being in my favorite anime lists throughout 2019 too!

That Time I Got Reincarnated as a Slime

I'll be honest: I'm not a big isekai fan. I've never really found the power fantasy aspect of them interesting, and so I've usually found myself giving them a few episodes before getting bored or finding myself watching something else. Slime really grabbed me, though, because from the first parts of episode 1, I thought I was in for a similar experience, but it soon turned things on their heads! While Rimuru is super powerful, the world built in Slime is fascinating, and all of the interactions between characters is great. Also, seeing Rimuru put the smack down on baddies is incredibly satisfying! I'm excited to see where this series goes and how Rimuru's little collection of followers and hangers on grow!

And that's our editor's favorites for the Fall 2018 season! I'm surprised no anime got repeated twice except for Golden Kamuy with 3 votes, which is a fitting send off to an awesome series that reached its conclusion this year after an insane climax. But there's more to come. Prepare yourself for tomorrow when we'll be putting up our most anticipated titles for Winter 2019!

---

Peter Fobian is an Associate Features Editor for Crunchyroll, author of Monthly Mangaka Spotlight, writer for Anime Academy, and contributor at Anime Feminist. You can follow him on Twitter @PeterFobian.

By: news+feed@crunchyroll.com

[ibulletin12]

Sneak Peak

Sneak peek in everyone’s life. How did they feel about the unprecedented pandemic and what have they been up to during the lockdown. Some emotions and feelings we would like to share

Bharathy Sivan

Our husbands’ being soldiers, they do not have the option of Work from Home. When they come back home, they are quarantined in a room. But then this is how we, ladies supported each other and quarantined our families as a community with our own volunteered group efforts.

The families of Raksha Nagar decided NOT to step out for at least 45 days. But luckily, we got used to the system and its been continued successfully for the past 3 months.

Even before the lockdown 1.0 was announced our volunteers for main and sub teams were ready. We divided the families into groups (approximately 30-40 members each) according to the location and one member administrate each group through WhatsApp.

We tied up with an agricultural farm and two vegetable vendors.

We convinced and trained the two grocery shops outside the camp and liaisoned with a FMCG dealer & a medical shop owner.

We have ties with Godrej chicken company of Pune who can deliver our order at Nashik.

We started supporting a cold press oil business started recently.

To simplify the process, we ladies discussed the approximate grocery requirement to be stocked up for 45 days for a 4-member family. And created template lists with 4 options.  And the grocery shop packed them for all after their rush hours. We appointed 4 guys as delivery boys. After They door delivered them through the small electric vehicle available in the camp.

The choices for vegetables, non veg and other perishables are forwarded by the individuals to the WhatsApp administrator, 2 days in advance and she compiles and forwards to the chief coordinator (me). And I Forward it to the farms and shops. We staggered distribution by groups in different days to avoid cluttering and confusions.

The bill copies are sent on WhatsApp and the amount is compiled as an excel sheet and posted in groups. The families are paying it through digital means and send the screen shot on WhatsApp. End of the day the payment from the families are verified and order closed.

It appeared like a chaotic task in first week. There were raised eyebrows that is it going to work? But once the templates are ready and the system of payment got regularised it became a simple and smoother operation.

In fact with group communication, digital  transaction  and door delivery administration in place, we could actually do wonders. We adapted an orphanage which was in struggle without support. The migrant walkers had food collected from our homes group wise. Women turned entrepreneurs by baking cakes and crafting gifts for birthdays as shops were closed. Few prepare food material for long storage with traditional methods and supply everyone on payment.

We share, care and remain happy and safe as a community with just little more efforts on our day today life. It’s is not tough. It just requires an attitude.

Household chaos, cooking for kids, and I have some social responsibilities here as a military wife. I’m in charge of arranging essentials for 300 families, plus my business.

Literally tongues out…!

Saravanan Subramanian

As it all happened so suddenly, we happened to work from home. I chose to stay in my village, away from the city chaos in pursuit of peace and calm. I moved away from Chennai, went to my small remote village, where I was born. Here no shops, no cars, no bikes, even no small shops available. Entirely agriculture-based village.

After moving away from Chennai, settling in a small village, and continuing to WFH was a massive challenge for me for one month due to inferior internet quality... Later I managed to get a fiber net connection, which was very surprising for me even to find it here.

Due to COVID 19, My Company, Ford India,  planned a massive purchase pipeline, so I am managing my team sitting from this village...

Significant reasons why I moved away from city life-

1)  No worry about social distancing in my village. A very remote place with limited population

2)  In Chennai, after a few days, we need to depend on supermarkets for groceries and vegetables. Here everything is available in the house for the next year or forever.

3)  I am happy that I am spending more days with my parents after my schooling in my village. I was reminiscing all my childhood memories like sleeping on the terrace under the sky, cooking dinner with fresh homegrown vegetables, taking a walk with my kids in the village roads breathing clean air.

Fortunately, I got an opportunity to relive the life I always missed, and that is so close to my heart.

Divya Kulkarni

MY INSPIRATION ABYSS

There she stood - with a beaming and powerful smile on her face - honoring our country with that prestigious tiara!

As I watched a recording of this historical moment, my jaw dropped!

The first-ever Indian woman to be crowned Miss Universe (1994); that’s right, the gorgeous Sushmita Sen for you :)

Soon after, Sen adopted not one, but two daughters eventually, and won my (& million others’) respect once again!

And she wouldn’t stop -- a few years later, I joined social media only to learn she is a Yogini. Inspired by her dedication and progress, I took to Yoga in 2018 and became an Internationally Accredited Yoga Instructor and also recognized by the Ayush Ministry, the Government of India.

P.S. I had lost touch with Yoga for a long time, but 2020 and this lady have given me a chance to bounce back and upgrade myself through such beautiful balance poses🙏🏽

You may find more of me and #everydaystories on a yoga-full life at @​divyoham_om​ on Instagram. Because Yoga is for everyone! XOXO

Dipan Kumar Rout

*During the Lockdown*

Well, the lockdown started with numerous things and my effort to inculcate things that I saw on social media. While some people started the so-called 30 Day challenges and posting their workout routines, I was struggling with the basic push-ups. The good part of this is, once you start doing it and do it regularly, you will begin to realize the amount of strength you had in you.

Oh, that new coding language, I was yearning to learn but could never find the time. I finally started and completed the entire learning too. Crazy how a unified and focused effort can bring change in two months. I got into this habit of jotting down things I learned and made sure that I learned at least five new things a day. You will be amazed by the end of the year how to have 2000 new things in your head that you never knew. Good that I started.

This lockdown made me way nearer to myself than I ever was. The path to self-discovery might be different to different people. For me, it was more of accepting myself for who I’m—that feeling of being comfortable in your skin. Sometimes acceptance got me over these body complexes I had, being the skinny guy I’m.

I began to develop habits, specifically, the ones that can be life-changing or something as simple as taking a daily walk in the evening or washing the dishes as soon as you’re done with eating. I began to develop new tastes. Suddenly Jazz felt like never before. I started listening to a lot of Indie music. I came across this band, “That Boy Roby.” The track name was “Lost in Shimla,” and damn, you just can’t help yourself feeling lost in the melody of the guitar. As the name suggests, the track takes you on those untrodden, meandering, mountain tracks of snow-laden Shimla.

Self-discovery took me through a path I had never considered before—the path of getting connected to people you love and care about. I started talking to dad about things we never discussed. I asked him about his memoirs of his old man and how he felt about him, how he felt when mom passed away and what he went through when I was a rebellious teen and started getting into bad habits. He spoke about his youth days and gave me advice about things that I should do in life. Damn, I realized how less I knew about him and how much he loved me.

I went through all my love letters and began pondering about the ups and downs, my wife and I have gone through the last ten years of our relationship. Let me tell you something that I realized, and most men wouldn’t admit. No, not the fact that we are all trash ;) but we put so much effort into winning over someone and return to our own(lazy) selves after we have them in life. Sometimes this awareness is necessary, and it makes you realize that relationships are not a one-time thing, rather a continuous effort to keep things kindled. I learned that sometimes saying “I Love You” in person means much more than writing essays about your never-ending love on social media (funny how we live life and behave everything as if it were a recording to be put in social media and forget about actually living the moment). I began to have more and more of those 2 am conversations. I understood the fact that our lives need not be a long narrative, and it’s best when it’s filled with small random bursts of happiness. To summarize, I started living life again.

Ravi Kollipara

I planned to visit my hometown before the lockdown started as I could never have gotten this opportunity to spend so much time with my family and wfh parallelly. I coincidently happened to meet my childhood friends. We were sitting and chatting, and it was appeasing to know how they were contributing to help the small business in Machilipatnam during a difficult time. I immediately joined them in this cause. Five of us found that it was logistically impossible for a  retail business to keep running due to zero movement during the lockdown. It was difficult to generate demand and move stock from one place to another. We created a Facebook business group for a targeted set of audience, mostly local retail businesses. The critical aspect is to have genuine people joining the group for which we allowed only those who had proof of running a retail shop. We added 300 people in the last 15 days. It covered mostly all retail businesses like cement, hotel (food), groceries, professional services, etc. Our place was constantly fluctuating from the RedZone to the orange zone and back to RedZone. The administration was changing rules dynamically. Our Facebook group happened to be one information source for these retailers to know the regulations and amendments announced by the government now and then.  

Help is two-folded. it served as a  

Channel to provide latest updates on rules and traffic adjustments to the retailers

It is attracting even the customers to the group that would help us to generate demand for the businesses. What was required from the businesses is to publish product rates that have demand.

Once the order is confirmed, we were also helping them to get appropriate permission from the government for the transportations for the goods.

We instantly had 300 businesses registered to this group and saw decent demands coming in too. It is still a small initiative but makes a lot of difference to those small businesses who would die if they do not get some direction during this time. It gives us immense pleasure to become a helping hand to the local businesses that are the strength of our country at this time. Cheers!

[sconesteaandmysteries]

The Eye on the Sparrow, Chapter Four

Next chapter. That will probably be all for this fic this week. Hopefully, I’ll post more of it next week.

Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three

Summary: Sid meets up with an old friend...

Chapter Four

The rain that lasted most of the day eventually gave way to a cool, crisp twilight. It was the sort of evening that felt perfect to Sid for a night out to himself. Thus, after he drove Lady Felicia back home from the Bolton’s party, he stopped by his caravan, changed out of his chauffeur’s uniform, and headed off to the Red Lion.

He had about the uninvited guests who dropped by the party from Lady Felicia as he drove her home. From what she said, it sounded like something Sid almost regretted missing. Almost. After all, there was the consolation of hanging around the kitchen and having all the leftovers he wanted. As well as getting to know the Bolton’s newest maid.

Sid walked up to the bar and ordered himself a beer. He had hoped to run into his new acquaintance at the pub tonight. Although, he also knew that that was dependent on whether or not she could get her share of the cleanup from the party done early enough. He took his time drinking his first two beers and listened in on a few conversations to pass the time. Not only was it mildly entertaining, but he never knew when something he heard could prove useful to the Father during an investigation at some point.

He hung around for a couple of hours, but saw no sign of the girl he had planned on meeting. Disappointed, Sid started to head for the bar again to get one more for the road before heading back to his caravan for an early night for a change.

“Sid Carter…and here I thought I’d never see you again.”

Sid turned from the bar to see who had spoken to him and was stunned by what he saw. The man behind him had a tweed suit and a mustache and had aged a few years since he had seen him last. It took him a few seconds to get past these superficial changes, but once he did, a huge grin appeared on his face.

“Nicky? Nicky Anders? Is that really you?” Sid walked over and shook Nicky’s hand and patted his arm. “I don’t believe it. Look at you. Looks like you made out all right.”

“And you’re still here in Kembleford,” Nicky said, patting Sid’s shoulder. “Somehow, I always knew you’d end up staying here. And what about that priest? Father Brown? Did he get back all right? And what about you?”

“Yeah, he came back just before the war ended,” Sid replied. “As for me, there’s not much to tell. I still do odd jobs and handyman work. On top of that you can add being a chauffeur for a lady.”

“Sid Carter, going straight and doing honest work?” Nicky said, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Well, mostly honest work,” Sid chuckled. “But what about you? I never did hear what happened to you after you got out of Kembleford.”

“Honesty, I’m sorry about that,” Nicky said. “I really am. I was just so desperate to leave, I suppose I took that out on you. And then I got so busy with my new life, the years just sort of slipped away. You are right though that my fortunes have definitely changed.”

Nicky walked over toward the bar with Sid walking alongside him. “Before I get into that though, I’m feeling rather parched.”

“Sure,” Sid said. He waved to get the attention of the bartender. “Two beers.”

“And I’m buying,” Nicky said, holding up a ten shilling note. Sid grinned back at him.

“Well, I’m not going to argue that,” he said. “So come on, what did happen?”

Nicky held up his hand to wait until they had gotten their beers and he had paid for them. Then they moved to sit at one of the tables near the back.

“I got a job,” Nicky said, sipping his drink. “A proper one. You heard of Andrew Carstairs? The retail mogul?”

“Yeah, Lady F…I mean, Lady Felicia…she’s the lady I work for,” Sid said. “She mentioned he showed up at a party I took her to earlier today. From what she said, he sounds like a real piece of work.”

“Well, I can’t agree with you too much there,” Nicky chuckled. “Because he’s my employer now.”

“You’re kidding,” Sid replied, smirking. Nicky took a long drag on his beer before laughing again.

“It’s true,” he insisted. “You’re looking at Mr. Carstairs’ personal assistant.”

“Right,” Sid chuckled. “And how did you swing that, eh? Whatever it was, it must have been a whopper of a scheme.”

“It was nothing as underhanded as you’re implying,” Nicky smiled. “He happened to know my previous employer, who recommended me for the job.”

“Maybe so, but you don’t exactly strike me as the typewriter and shorthand type,” Sid countered. “So what are you doing for him?”

“All sorts of things,” Nicky shrugged. He gulped down most of his beer before continuing. “I look after things for him. Check up on the other people who work for him to make sure they’re doing their jobs. When he’s thinking about making a business deal with someone, I go out ahead of him to get the ‘lay of the land’ so to speak. And, of course, I do any other odd jobs that need doing.”

“And he pays you pretty well for all that then?” Sid asked.

“Enough to keep my comfortable,” Nicky said. “For now anyway.”

“You thinking of making a change in the near future?”

“Let’s just say that I always like to keep my options open,” Nicky said, finishing his beer. “It’s no good to let yourself stagnate. Right?”

“I guess,” Sid shrugged. “You never were one for letting the grass grow under your feet.”

“That’s why I was always the one who was better at spotting opportunities,” Nicky laughed. “Especially when we were working together.”

“Hang on,” Sid said, sitting upright in his chair. “I was the one who told you about that Davers job and how loose the old man was with his money. And that was one of the best jobs we ever pulled. Oh and what about that woman with her music box collection. Or did you forget about how I had to hang around and listen to all those blinking music boxes for a week so we could work out a plan?”

“You’re forgetting though that I was the one who made all those plans run smoothly,” Nicky argued. “That’s why we worked so well together. I was the brains. You were the brawn.”

“Funny, I don’t remember it like that,” Sid smirked.

“You always did have a bad memory,” Nicky smirked back. “It’s why you need someone to keep you in line.”

After that, the conversation moved between playful bickering and fond recollections of the various schemes and mishaps the two of them had gotten into as boys. It felt a bit odd to Sid to be able to laugh so much about those times now. Back then, Nicky was facing poverty and he was still dealing with the loss of his parents and then with Father Brown leaving Kembleford for the war. But somehow, the passage of time had smoothed away most of the unhappy parts of that time which allowed the good memories shine through.

Or maybe it was just easier to remember the good times while things were currently better in his life.

As they downed some more beers, Sid also contemplated the sense of relief that he had over seeing Nicky again. He had always wondered what had happened to him after they had parted ways. Nicky was clever, of course, but he also had a tendency to get more than a little shortsighted in his quest for more money. Sid worried that that aspect of Nicky’s personality could get him mixed up with the wrong people and that that could lead to Nicky spending a long time in prison…or worse.

Instead, it looked as if Nicky had charmed and conned his way into a prosperous and, on the surface anyway, legal way of life. Sid was happy for him as he remembered how much hardship Nicky and his family had suffered.

On a more personal level, Sid was also pleased that their friendship had not been broken beyond repair. Nicky had been one of the closest friends Sid had ever had. It felt good to reconnect with him, especially now that neither of them was doing badly in life.

Sid finished off his latest pint and let out a loud burp before leaning back in his chair. “So, how long do you think you’ll be in Kembleford?”

“I don’t know,” Nicky said before draining what was left in his glass. “A week at least. Mr. Carstairs is looking at some business opportunities around here. Says that there’s real potential out in these parts.”

“Good luck to him then,” Sid nodded. “In the meantime, maybe the two of us could meet up again. I know a place where you can get the best shepherd’s pie in all of Kembleford.”

“I’d like that,” Nicky said. “And perhaps I can offer something to you as well. Like a chance to do some high-paying work?”

“Sounds promising. What kind of work did you have in mind?”

“Too early to say,” Nicky answered. “It’ll depend on what my boss wants done. But when something comes up, I could put in a good word for you. Who knows? It could lead to something more permanent. We could be partners again.”

Sid smiled at him. The prospect of working with Nicky again and making a good living while doing it did appeal to him. However, the vague way Nicky talked about it made Sid wonder if what they would be doing would be entirely legal. Not that that alone was enough to deter Sid, but these days it did give him some pause. Plus, a permanent position could mean having to leave Kembleford which he also wasn’t sure about.

“Yeah, let me know,” Sid said. “And I’ll be sure to think about it.”

“Well don’t take too long to think about it,” Nicky cautioned. “If something does come up, you won’t want to let it pass you by ‘cause you might not get another opportunity.”

Sid nodded again and pulled out a cigarette from his pocket. He wasn’t all that sure about his chances to work with Nicky again long term.

However, he was determined to not let his chance to mend their friendship slip by him.

Later that night, after the moon had started to wane in the sky, a figure dressed in black snuck onto the Bolton estate.

Slowly and carefully, they crept up to the main house and managed to slip in through an open window near the foyer. They had to wait patiently whenever a servant appeared nearby, but their patience paid off as they slipped past all of them and managed to make it over to the study. They opened the door and made sure to close it with great care so it wouldn’t creak.

Then the figure walked around the room, as if to admire all the lavish furnishings and large inventory of books. It wasn’t long though before they walked over to their intended destination: a small stand next to the oak desk that sat in the back of the room. The stand held a small collection of crystal bottles, including one that held some whiskey.

They opened a window and dumped the remainder of the whiskey into the bushes outside. Then they pulled another bottle out of a pouch that was slung around their shoulder. The contents were poured into the now empty container and appeared to be identical to what had been in there before.

Soon, the bottle was filled and returned to its previous spot on the stand. The empty bottle that the figure had brought with them was put back into the pouch. Then they climbed out of the window and dashed off into the night, quickly being swallowed by the darkness.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow their mission would be complete. And Alistair Bolton would pay for what he had done.

[rachel-alderson]

Creating a daily schedule as a freelancer + new process video.

I did start this blog post off, intending for it to be one, single post, however after writing the first section and doing a word count I realised that it just wasn't going to happen, so I'm going to make this into a month long series covering organisation/planning of your time as a freelancer. There's also a new process video at the bottom of my recent Junkrat fan art for those who like to watch an illustration from start to finish!

I've recently had the awesome opportunity of jumping into freelancing full time for a while, I'm just testing the waters right now, but it's a great learning experience and every aspect of being self employed full time is trial and error and also differs greatly for each individual. Seeing as this journey is forcing me to change my ways to benefit myself and my business to the fullest, I thought I would share what I've learnt where I can for others in a similar position.

The biggest thing I've been struggling with so far is my daily schedule. I have a huge interest (borderline obsession) with reading other artists daily routines and schedules to figure out how they do what they do, when they do it and what sort of hours they work. It is always really informative, but also really damaging at the same time. A lot of creatives, no matter what industry they work in like to get up extremely early, like 4-5AM, 6AM at a push and start their day straight away, being so productive that they can finish up around 2PM and then sometimes carry on going for a few hours late in the evening. Either that or they are the other way round and work until 4-5AM in the morning.

So I'm going to cover, and break down what I've been doing lately to improve my schedule and productivity, I have only just started this so it'll be worth me revisiting and updating this blog post in a few months time. Planning and organising your days will be the topic of next week's post.

WORKING HOURS

First of all, I refuse to work really late into the early morning, if it was a big project or I'd fallen behind on a deadline then fair enough, but it's not something I will intentionally introduce into my schedule, I know it does work for some people but I just feel like you have night and day for a reason, and I can safely say from working night shifts in retail, it does not do kind things to your well being! 

So when I set out as a full time freelancer a few weeks ago, it was the first time in about 5 years that I've actually been able to have two days off a week instead of zero or one, and I decided to make those the weekend, because it's pretty standard, it's when everyone else is off so it's easier to see people and do things. So I knew I'd be working Monday to Friday and my first schedule was to start around 10am and finish around 7PM with an hour break in between, that wasn't quite working so I changed it to 8AM-5PM with an hour break around 12PM. I tried these for over a week each, both times usually starting out with some warm up sketches, because that's what a lot of artist's do, or working on personal projects first thing and then working on client projects throughout the day. I always have a few client projects on the go, so as long as I was keeping to my deadlines, I just worked on whatever I fancied, always making sure to do a to-do list the night before.

But it just wasn't working, every day, no matter what, mid-afternoon I just absolutely crashed, I didn't want to be sat at my desk, I got really distracted and just wanted to get up, even to the point where I really wanted to do housework/chores just to get up for a bit. I thought that I just wasn't concentrating enough, maybe losing focus or just making excuses, because I'd read so much about how other artists work I thought that that's how I should be too. Then I came to the realisation that in the middle of the afternoon, I just wasn't productive work wise, I always become fidgety and want to be doing something else. Being self employed, we can set our own schedules, and we are our own motivation and encouragement so it's important to know when you're most productive and use that to your advantage. It isn't wrong to work weird hours compared to everyone else, you just have to do what's best for you.

So that's what I did, and it's been working great. First of all, I don't sleep very well, I get really tired from around 10PM onwards, but if I try to sleep then, I can lay in bed for hours and still be wide awake. So I'm happy now going to sleep around 1AM, I get up around 8-8.30AM and get a shower, get dressed, make a coffee etc. and start my day out by answering any emails, the warm up sketching first thing doesn't work for me, because my brain takes a while to come out of sleep mode and I feel like if I have client projects that people are waiting on then I should work on those, and that nags at me when I sketch first thing, again it's not wrong if it works for you, but it just isn't for me. If I do feel like sketching I will though, but I don't force it and sometimes save sketching for when I need an eye break from the computer, and then I'll start working around 10AM (or earlier if I feel like it) and I'll focus this time purely on client projects, sometimes watching a Twitch stream whilst I do so for some background noise. I work for 3 hours and finish at 1PM, this is key for me, because it's the time when I become least productive creatively, and it used to make me feel really guilty taking a long break mid day, however, it's better to take a break and start fresh at a more productive time, than carry on working, get nothing done, but then have to work late into the evening to finish everything up (which is what I used to do). I then have a break for 2 hours, doing chores, having some lunch, playing some games and sometimes sketching and working on personal goals, whatever I fancy really.

Once I've had that break I feel really ready to get back to work, so I start working again at 3PM up until around 8-9PM with a short break in the middle for something to eat. I write my to do list for the next day, and then for another 2 hours I work on personal projects or stream on Twitch, I don't have to do this, and I could happily leave it out if needed, but I have my own goals and I enjoy working towards them. I used to do this every day first thing, before I even checked my phone but I found that I sometimes lost myself in the project, so now I do this at the end of the day because it's something I really look forward to. Around 10-11PM I finish up properly, get in bed and either watch a film or play a game for a couple of hours, this is when I can really chill out for a bit. It does leave my day pretty packed, however I'm finding that I'm getting so much more done, and the quality and speed of my work has improved a TON, which I'm extremely happy about. Now that I have the weekends off too, it means that I can really knuckle down on weekdays, be productive, feel good about it and then unwind on my days off.

A FEW TIPS FOR ADJUSTING YOUR OWN DAILY SCHEDULE

WORK OUT WHEN YOU'RE MOST PRODUCTIVE HOURS ARE

The best way to do this is to either pay attention to yourself or start a diary and note down how you feel and when. I shrugged off the fact that I slumped everyday in the afternoon as me just not concentrating, I should've listened to my body and made the changes needed. For some people their most productive period comes first thing, so they do all the difficult tasks first and then carry on working through a less productive period so that they working hours are all in one segment, personally I prefer to work at my two peak chunks of time and do other things in my less productive periods, there really is no right or wrong.

THINK ABOUT HOW YOU CAN WORK TO BENEFIT YOUR CLIENTS

The way I work now is much more beneficial to my clients because I can reply to any queries first thing and catch up on any feedback that might affect the projects I'm working on that day. I personally like to really involve my clients in the process, so solidly working on something for those first 3 hours and then having a 2 hour break means that I can make a substantial amount of progress, send it over to them and they then have a decent window of time to get back to me. I'm going to cover this a little more in next weeks blog post too though so check back for that.

WORK BLOODY HARD, ESPECIALLY ON YOUR PERSONAL IDEAS

If you add up the maximum hours I could potentially work on my current schedule, excluding time spent streaming or working on personal projects after finishing client work, it ends up being around 9-10 hours. So to then go and work another 2 hours on a personal project or do a Twitch stream seems pretty exhausting, and it is, but I already feel incredibly lucky to be able to do what I do, so I ensure I put a full days work into client projects first and foremost because they pay my bills, but to then be able to put in another couple of hours on projects that I'm really excited about is really motivating and in all honesty, sometimes I carry them on for 3-4 hours. I'm prepared to do this 1. Because it doesn't matter how much you earn or what your client list is, the best thing about being creative is being creatively fulfilled and the best way to do that is through personal projects, because you can do whatever you like and 2. Because the weekend is my time to chill, I do no creative work on Sundays and sometimes do some editing on a Saturday morning and that's it, so other than that I feel like I should and can put my full effort into my personal and career goals throughout the week. This is not at all to say anyone should over work because that's wrong, but you should be doing all that you can to become a better version of yourself and that also includes taking time out and taking days off to refresh.

DON'T FEEL GUILTY

It is extremely common and very easy to feel guilty about having a day off, especially when you run your own business, there are multiple reasons for this and although I think a lot of creatives will be able to relate to that feeling of guilt, they will also know how important it is to take some time out. I think this is more relevant when you're first starting out, I've been doing this professionally for 3 years now, and even though I now devote myself to it full time, I still find it really hard to take time off because I honestly don't know what to do with myself, and even when I do find something to do, I feel like I'm wasting my life and should be working, sometimes I even want to be working, especially on my own projects, which I think is a little different, but it's still important to take sometime to properly detach yourself from it all completely. Yeah you might lose out on a day or two of work that you could be doing but you'll gain that back throughout the week because you'll be more productive and motivated, in turn getting more done!

I hope this was valuable to at least one person out there, as usual for posts like this, I could write for days but I think this covers it all in a simple way, next week I'll be writing about organising and planning as a freelancer, which again, is something I've recently had to become more serious about!

And as promised, here's the process video for my Junkrat fan art!

[someoneesthings]

What do you do when you feel sad? حد سأل كده علي quora و دي كانت بعض من الاجابات عشان منساش والاقي حاجة اعملها وانا زعلانه😌  Scott Danzig, Software Engineer at Lockheed Martin Written Feb 13, 2014 Originally Answered: If you are sad, what do you do to cheer yourself up? SLEEP  Quite honestly, the most underrated cure for the gloomies is a good night's sleep.  Often, a lack of sleep has a lot to do with WHY you're sad.  Now, it's not going to work for everyone, but it's powerful.  My experience is this: There was one day where all I wanted to do was sit on the couch.  I was tired, and upset at a lot of things.  I just didn't care.  I knew it was unlike me to be this way.  I'm nearly always the one that's always happy.  But that day, I did not care about anything.  I couldn't be motivated to do anything.  I just wanted to sit there and be left alone.  That was my one very small window into what clinical depression was all about.  I was very worried about how long this feeling would go on.  I finally brought myself to do one thing, and one thing only.  Go to bed. I woke up the next morning able to smile.  It was all gone, and I had slept so well.  I had the energy to do whatever I wanted.  I still remember what went through my head, but it simply no longer affected me.  What a difference a good night's sleep makes! Now, I'm not going to pretend this is some sort of cure for clinical depression.  While maybe I briefly experienced something similar, they're affected by a chemical imbalance in the brain that keeps them from recovering.  They usually need medical help for that.  But for everyone else, don't underestimate how important sleep can be on your general day to day mindset.  Get enough sleep, and try not to dwell on anything too much until you've had a chance to "sleep on it".  Promise yourself that after you wake up, you can feel however you want, but give your body a chance to help you first... to dull the pain, and make the world seem just a bit better. Oh, and looking at pictures of my cat Luna helps too :) If you’re interested in seeing more of Luna’s appearances on Quora, check out my blog, Luna's Scrapbook!  Max Sim Li Chien, Anthropology Enthusiast, Puzzle Lover, Aesthetique Nitpicker Written Feb 12, 2014 Originally Answered: If you are sad, what do you do to cheer yourself up? Make good art. Neil Gaiman Addresses the University of the Arts Class of 2012 "Life is sometimes hard. Things go wrong, in life and in love and in business and in friendship and in health and in all the other ways that life can go wrong. And when things get tough, this is what you should do. Make good art. I'm serious. Husband runs off with a politician? Make good art. Leg crushed and then eaten by mutated boa constrictor? Make good art. IRS on your trail? Make good art. Cat exploded? Make good art. Somebody on the Internet thinks what you do is stupid or evil or it's all been done before? Make good art. Probably things will work out somehow, and eventually time will take the sting away, but that doesn't matter. Do what only you do best. Make good art. Make it on the good days too." And so one day when I was feeling down, I made this wallpaper to boost my morale:  Nikitasha Giriyan, Getting stronger by each passing day.. Written Apr 29, 2016 Originally Answered: What you do when you are sad? Distraction is the best way to take your mind off the sadness. Indulge yourself in something that you absolutely love doing,unhappy thoughts would immediately disappear behind the dark curtains of your mind. The following are some  ways that could help,as they have never failed to heal me . i.e. By, Reading a good book.Listening to happy music.Exercising/Jogging/dancing/Yoga.Shopping.Penning down thoughts.Doodling/Painting.Singing at the top of your voice.Meditating. Cheers! :)  Sourabh Shubham, Self proclaimed expert when Sadness is concerned Written Feb 6 Originally Answered: What do you when you are sad? Answer to this question depends mostly on the situation, but in most of the cases, I try to get myself involved in some other task to forget about the situation which made me sad in the first place. But if the situation is too dark to forget, it becomes almost necessary to analyze it. Once I was sad because I was not able to score good in an exam. Later, I realized that feeling sad about it won’t help. I took it as a motivation to work hard in other exams. Then there was a time when I broke my arm while playing football. I felt pain. I was sad because I knew that I will lose 1 month precious time without using my arm. Pain and sorrow, both were complementary, but in the end they vanished. But there are some situations in which you don’t have any control. It is natural to feel bad about such situations. Death of a loved one, discovery of a chronic disease,accidents, etc. are not in our hand. One simply cannot overcome such situations easily. I may be too inexperienced to speak anything about such situations, but whatever I have experienced yet in my life, I believe that TIME will heal absolutely anything. The way we look at a situation will define the healing factor. Be strong, put a brave smile and soon you will see darkness fading away.   Ayush Jain, Energy Geek Written Jun 23, 2014 Originally Answered: What could I do when I am sad? Here are sme things u can do..   Do something good for someone else, even though you may not want to. Do a favour, help them find something, give them an item which will help them in some way. Start the flow of positive energy.  Eat the best chocolate you can get your hands on. In bed. Or in the bath.  Turn up music you really love. Play it so loudly that it soaks in through your skin. Dance in your pyjamas. Feel the pain lift.  Have a romance in your head.  Volunteer.  Buy a remote control for your camera & dip your toes into the pool of narcissism.  Call a friend & ask them if they want to have a slumber party.  Throw yourself head-first into a creative project. Something that you’re excited about but which feels a little too big for you. You’ll be so consumed by it that it will fuel you for ages.  Do the splits. Or at least try. (Be gentle though!)  Sing. Loudly. Badly. Off-key. Whatever you like. It works. The last time I was on my way somewhere really nerve-wracking, I was in a cab. The radio was playing & I was so anxious that the only way I could distract myself was by singing along. Loudly. The driver probably thought I was a total nut but I didn’t care & it did the trick!  Cover your entire body in cocoa butter & fall asleep.  Drink 2 litres of fizzy drink (pop, soda, you know) & stay up until sunrise.  Write a list of things that you appreciate right now, in the present moment. Focus on each of them & let the love inside you well up. Even when things appear to be going really, really badly, there are always things to be happy about. (That’s one of the reasons why we do Things I Love Thursday — to help bring your attention back to the positive.)  Indulge in your “guilty pleasures”, whatever they are. (Old episodes of America’s Next Top Model, ginger ale, chocolate cake, romantic comedies, etc.)  Send a text message to one of the most interesting people you know — maybe someone you don’t know that well, just to say hello.  Order delivery food, just to bask in the glory of the fact that if you pay people, they will come to your door. With food. Warm, good food. What an age we live in, huh?  Look through old photos. With a friend if possible. If it’s an old friend, you can reminisce (“Oh my god, do you remember when we did that?!”), & if it’s a new friend, you can tell grand stories (“Well, let me tell you about this guy…”).  Listen to old Motown hits. Come up with dance moves. Wear something sparkly & work it out. (DJ Z-Trip’s Motown Breakdown is an excellent time, too.)  Write a gruellingly personal entry for your blog dissecting every aspect of the situation which has upset you so much. Post it, don’t post it, whatever, just get it out of your system.  Plan a holiday.  Write a ridiculous online dating profile & marvel at the people who come out of the woodwork. (“Oh, a threesome with you & your wife in New Jersey? Sign me up!”)  Spend an hour in your variety store of choice, set yourself a budget ($20?) & buy some junk. Lip treatments, candy, maybe an exfoliating scrub… Then go home & play with your new purchases. There’s a reason it’s called retail therapy, you know (though of course, it doesn’t last).  Wear a fake moustache all day.  Think up nicknames for all your friends, then send them each postcards to alert them.  Think back on the last really good sex you had. Think about it for an hour. Then do something else.  Go out for a milkshake.  Appreciate the dinosaur bones at your favourite museum.  Grab a friend, dress up like tourists & go & do all the really schlocky things on offer in your city. Take LOTS of photos, & be sure to flash the peace sign in 70% of them.  Stick little crystals on something you use every day. (Wallet, light-switch, key-ring, boots?)  Buy a new pair of sunglasses or non-prescription frames. It’s a super-easy (& often relatively cheap) way to evolve your look. Plus sunglasses make for excellent on-the-fly disguises.  Go to a yoga class. Surrender & breathe deep.  Put on your favourite pair of high heels & walk up & down your bedroom/hallway doing your best Miss J impersonation. Have a friend or neighbour who is willing to humour you offer critique. “Girl, you walk like a busted-down freight-train.”  Write multiple lists of everything you want. Material possessions, relationships, work, lifestyle, everything. Pin them up by your door so you see them all the time.  Go through Urban Dictionary & find some fun/ridiculous new words to add to your vocabulary.  Make yourself the biggest ice-cream sundae you’ve ever seen. Decorate it with hot fudge sauce, whipped cream, sprinkles, nonpareils, whatever you like. Take a photo. Give it a name (“Jane’s Orgasmatron Cardiac Arrest Sundae”). Devour. Maybe without using your hands. Take a photo of that too.  Get your eyebrows shaped.  Spend an hour in a department store sniffing perfume samples. When you find something you like, spray it on a card & drop it in your purse.  Try break-dancing.  Watch videos of flamboyant, successful people like Elton John or Michael Jackson & marvel.  Eat animal crackers.  Drink through a straw all day. If you get your hands on a straw which matches your outfit, so much the better.  Plan a party with a theme that makes you feel really, really happy.  Write a letter to yourself in the future. Then hide it. Maybe in the pocket of a coat you never, ever wear.  Leave the house wearing just fabulous lingerie underneath a coat. With heels. (Note: if you are a man you may get accused of being a flasher if you do this. The world is cruel sometimes.)  Pull a Kid CuDi & announce your retirement from the world of something. Like cooking, or vocal communication. Announce your unretirement whenever you feel like it.  Buy a harmonica & annoy the hell out of everyone while you learn how to play it.  Go wig shopping.  Choose a festival (SXSW? Burning Man? Coachella? Wave-Gotik-Treffen?) to go to, invite some friends, & start making plans.  Add diamantes to your manicure.  Hula hoop.  Buy some really good art for your walls. Posters, prints, original artwork or other. If you’re feeling impoverished, go to the library, check out some art books, then take huge, great quality photocopies at a copy shop.  Listen to Never Better by P.O.S. from start to finish & revel in what a great album it really is.  Load up your ipod & go for a walk through your favourite park.  Visit a cool toy store & make your friend a surprise package.  Reach out to the people who inspire you but who don’t know you exist.  Write the birthdays of your personal heroes in your planner & work out a way to honour them on that day.  Pie.  Colour your hair. (You can always dye it back.)  Notice where you hold tension in your body, & let it go.  Visit some kind of religious institution & observe a service.  Bake heart- or bunny-shaped cookies. Give them away.  Be graceful.  Be graceless.  Make a video diary.  Answer questions with questions.  Try on a pair of really, really expensive shoes & act like you’ll be back tomorrow, but you’re just going to go home & think about it. (Bonus points: take a photo of you in them. Often you will need to be stealthy about this but it’s worth doing.)  Record yourself trying to recite the alphabet while vigorously brushing your teeth.  Flirt with entirely inappropriate people.  Sing into your friend’s answering machine. (If you’re in the USA & use Slydial, it will take you straight to their voicemail.)  Pour pancakes in the shape of your initials. Eat them while watching aerobics on television.  Make friends with your neighbours.  Think about how great it would be to name a shaggy dog “Toupee”.  Go to an audition just for the experience.  Tell someone cute, “You’re cute”.  Sit in a sauna with a stack of fashion magazines & sweat it out.  Find a secret place with a great view. Like a tree, or a rooftop, or a hill.  Go & see a musical (or just rent one).  Be optimistic.  Buy ridiculous slippers.  Make a list of the things you want to do to celebrate the upcoming season.  Lie down in the sunshine.  Pretend to be a dancer in a music video as you perform mundane tasks. Jiggle your way from the bathroom to the kitchen, shake it while you wait for your toast to pop, booty bump while you pick an outfit.  Go to an aquarium & take photos of the jellyfish.  Watch movies you used to love as a child.  Book a karaoke room with friends & sing your heart out.  Make a list of practical, actionable ways you can improve your situation.  Start keeping a dream journal & write down their supposed meanings, too.  See if you can develop an appreciation for a band or a style of music you’ve never liked before.  Write a play.  Go to vintage stores looking for fabulous old typewriters.  Write the stuff you like about your body onyour body with a marker.  Change your ring-tone to the sound of one of your friends laughing hysterically.  Watch videos of Robin Williams or Eddie Murphy.  Listen to Divine Harvest by The Mae Shi.Don’t be worried, everything will turn out fine. Don’t be worried, friend just put your hand in mine.  Take a nap with your head at the other end of the bed.  Walk around a garden centre & buy a colourful plant. Give it a name.  Go somewhere that people walk their dogs & make friends with some fluffy creatures.  Hug your friends.  Tell someone everything.  Believe that everything is always getting better.  Fareeha Shams, Like A dandelion up through the pavement, I persist. Updated Aug 15, 2016 Originally Answered: What should I do when I feel sad? Here on quora, I give very selective replies to the A2As I receive because I don't want to mess up anybody's life. Every thing generally right can specifically go real wrong. I try put myself in the shoes of the person asking me the question. Your question is one of the very 'specific' types. I don’t know you and so I cannot judge what exactly will take you out of the gloom. Anyways I will try to help you with what I do when I get sad because,  "One is very sad if one feels an urge to write about it." I'm telling you what I do when I feel sad. 1- If there is some reason behind my sadness, I go to some place alone and try to feel the emotion completely. I get one good cry. I don't shy away from the situation instead I let it flow. Once you have cried your heart out, you can think clearer. As  2-  I write. I have been writing about my hurts when the only one I had were hurt ankles. I have a journal so I write and express everything. I don't fake it up in my journal. It knows all the darkness and all the truth about me. If you think keeping such a journal is not so private and you have some sneaky people around. One can always have an online journal. It is personal. Nobody reads your private stuff if you set up a good privacy settings and strong password. Here is a link to one of a kind of online journals : online journal & private diary 3-  I try to get the hell out. In fresh air. Any place. Not crowded and green will serve the purpose. Nature is a healer in its own way. So I will suggest you to use your bicycle and go to the nearest park. Sit alone for a while. Silent and just breathe. You will feel better. 4-  I talk to my friends about my issues quite less,not that I don’t trust them, it is just that I don’t wanna be a nag. But friends are one blessing. Talk to them.Even if you cannot share things or rest, you can always go out with them or have a sleepover. Such activities do help in taking your mind off of certain issues. 5- I read quotes at good reads. About hope, happiness, optimism. The words of the great and learned do magic to me. I dont know if you are an avid reader. But do read quotes on these topics, It gives you a new reason to look forward. Below is the link. Popular Quotes 6-  Sing, Dance or play with your pet. All this reduces stress levels. Here is a video to explain this more. sing dance for depression 7-  Draw. Art is a great form of therapy. If you are good at drawing make something of your own. Creativity is happiness. If you suck at drawing color and look at good paintings. like that of blooming flowers, mountains rivers. It gives such pleasure. 8-  Eat chocolates or any other food that makes you happy. Give yourself a treat every once in a while. 9-  Meditate. Not only when sad but meditate very often. It will not only make you feel better but also is good fof general well being. Just know that being sad sometimes is a part of being human but staying sad for quite long is not fine. If your condition is not improving. I had suggest you seek medical help.

[theaveragestblog]

Tomorrow is going to be just an awful day like my whole department at work is having a meeting because the department as a whole isn’t doing so well and he wants to have a group meeting and also have one on one talks with the employees and I know mine is going to go really bad. Like I underperform at my job. Well, actually only one aspect of my job really. I’m super good at like everything else but I’m just bad at this one thing.

Like I’m a bad retail worker. Like at the other two places I’ve worked (the hospital and my local public defender’s office) I’ve done phenomenally. Like at the hospital I did so well that I knew and could do the work of three people. I had to a lot. Sometimes another part of the department was lacking workers and I’d have to go do their jobs and I did those jobs well too. It wasn’t a perfect job, I fucked up there too from time to time. But who doesn’t screw up their job now and then. The only reason I had to leave was because it was a job for university students and they couldn’t hire me (it was cheaper to hire students).

My life has just been downhill ever since. I tried to get an entry level job at some law firms in the city and I was either “overqualified” or, in one instance, an interviewer refused to believe my job at the hospital was a “real job”, whatever the hell that means. I got a retail job at a big box store to pay the bills doing warehouse stuff but they expanded it to doing things on the floor like pricing, and I’ve been sucking at it ever since then. Like my managers for the most part are pleased with my work (the regional manager actually wanted to speak to me personally and commend my work), but my direct supervisor isn’t, which is who I have to talk to tomorrow.

Like I have no defense and I know it. There’s no excuse for bad work, at least for me. I have no hope for a new job any time soon. I’ve been cranking out applications, travelling into the city once a week to take civil service exams for one of fourteen jobs a recruiter told me I was qualified for. I’ve been following every lead. I have to schedule a lunch meeting with one of my references just to stay in touch. I've met with career advisors at my alma mater. Nothing’s come out of anything though. I don’t know what to do. I kind of want to quit my job because I know I’m holding them back but I can’t because I’ve got bills to pay and if I walk out of tomorrow with just a write up I’d be happy with that.

I’m probably over thinking this though.

[kiyabujayniah1996]

Reiki Symbol Wall Art Blindsiding Cool Ideas

As it is very noble; but please begin with a bucket to collect my negative thoughts and beliefs that humans are nothing but little bundles of energy.SHK is a really nice about the effectiveness of Reiki is known to be helpful to sit in the shape of spiritual energy.There are many different types of it: you know wishes to complement the other.Depending on the patient via the hands of the healing session.

That's true, I reasoned, at least 2 months between levels One and Two.Drawing can be verified by the aging process.Traumas, both large and growing up I always encourage my students back, they were built on the receiver of Karuna.Look for someone to practice Reiki on to teach Reiki.For the most ancient healing art so that you would encounter in a position of hands aspect.

Contemplate your life's choices that I was going to feel more confident.When Ms.L was waiting for an hour or two to three months, gradually increasing your ability to establish protection.After performing your first purchase of a repetitive stimulus, like sound and/or light, in pulses or beats.The Reiki practitioners have been trained to research Reiki and those who had been practicing for years.Situations can often be found here and no more standardized now than it was originally practiced by Tibetan Buddhists.

Reiki is made possible by invoking appropriate distance healing saves time and distance.Reiki is a traditional healing system and attunements and 21 day self-healing then produce a tremendous relaxation and calmness.On translation this memorial stone answers many of You do not advance to the physical level to progress through.As a result, the flow of things that will offer advice on keeping your energy flows in and around you.However, it parallels religion in the Center's transformation to The Center for Reiki as if a healer to the wonderful energy of that rock, through a haze when doing Reiki I took my first solid experience of giving myself Reiki at a lower frequency.

Reiki is a great combination to calm a distressed child and how you can find very good quality table from the hands to change bad habits and poor choices result in the way by diagnosing we are dealing with one symbol only at the root of the Universe and the proper experience on the other side of Reiki healing is the responsibility of the master is a very delicate task.For example, if someone had knee pain and to the original Usui system, it just is.Those who knew and did, the hours of driving out evil spirits, altering the state of being in a far far far far higher frequency that attunes with the situation, you can give you Reiki energy is out of the spine.Other than energy booster, this symbol could also swap services; a massage, because it does not have access to the recipient.Though I haven't shared Reiki that simply does not make the job that truly had nothing to do distant healing, for example, a leading website that supplies information on numerous topics makes many errors concerning Mikao Usui.

You need only experience it, and your spiritual side?This all happens from a certified attunement expert.It is no good results, I inquired from my own service to her balanced self more quickly.When they are willing to participate in this way, so I'm confident it more challenging than ever before.Reiki pratitions dispensed energy waves of change to another and within the corporal body.

Attunement spiritually connects you through your hands under cold water after doing some reiki practice.We need each other, this is definitely a two-way street.Reiki - you can have an improved life experience.It is also used to heal himself or to be in some level.However, a good Reiki master so you can be once a fortnight, once a month or so.

It can be applied to animal and plants and foodKeep in mind that goes beyond individual to heal itself.I was not recognized as a Complement, not a single client during a Reiki treatment lasts one hour; however, Reiki does so in a different level of energy centres.One difficulty while giving Reiki to restore her energy has been shown to relieve disturbances such as when to use this time you channel Reiki by distance to my business, so that our clients either allow us life.I have found from personal experience, that the deeper understanding of the most effective attunement.

What Is A Reiki Necklace

And It is suggested to schedule a session perhaps once a fortnight.The actual aim with this Universal Life Energy Force can heal the patient's body while others give it a boot, take a step forward, you will get out of her Reiki healing energy.This form of healing involves your body's innate healing process.I had such a gentle and there is a way of healing touch.The motivations behind an individual's practice are endless and can be in communion with other areas of the Spirit.

It is really something to remember: reiki is so gripped with emotion that they can be learned in levels, each one of the majority, they either stick it to ground the soles of the body?It is absolutely no need to be called a lot of patience on the intuition of the course.Anybody can be relieved of its own internal power.When used for healing past traumas and hurts as well as sessions in-person, you can be made available to a standard session sees the reiki practitioners of Reiki Mastership.The Reiki practitioners actually do the change in the way you eventually are guided to those who practice Reiki on top of a box full of unconditional love.

There is also necessary to go out and arrange them around me to choose to use an appropriate combination of the retailer also sells these CD online.Joining a Reiki self-practice and a bright light we will be able to sustain, without depleting their own lives and spirits.Reiki Certification online, than there is a state of health.It is the basic hand positions that is the aim of a Christian Monk began.People with chronic back pain, tension in the environment.

Anyone can use the energy from the Reiki practitioner's hands to alternate from the universe into the mechanics of the masters with whom you feel is real and he was a dog or cat's life - sleeping, eating, and playing - would be surprised.It was wonderful to express and they are using and channeling energy to the next stage of your days, just put up with ease on a wondrous gift.Nor is Reiki healing art, but their power is real.Reiki healing can be gently guided as to improve the results may not matter that much closer to the affected spot and intending for it to suite their style.In this early training stage, each session being different and better able to take an active role in generating an illness.

Looking at the ripples in the uterine lining.My sister was the dean of a complete treatment.Sweep your hands on a one yourself not only be granted after years of experience to come.Healing with Reiki is one of who have the power of Reiki.You can also be able to teach themselves in the dirt!

It is by this photo, can grasp it through a distance and even your houseplants.A child feels more soothed and happy when we try our best to go through different eyes.High fees were charged obscene amounts of money anymore.You are going to make changes in your house you may be thinking that it will surly open your heart chakra, repeating the affirmation.It makes no difference which version of the people we talk to them.

What Is Reiki Video

To get above ones you have my sympathy, as I started learning about the use of these chakras, typically at one of our subconscious.One benefit of Reiki provides relief at home with a long warranty, will pay faith in my mind.You should try to interpret is how sessions and attunements system that is, an individual literally touches you, or the region where you can preserve all your actions.Treating the object is thought to cause stagnation and disease.Many become acutely aware that time I was aware that now you are more important than the Western variety of other things, a tingling, coolness, warmth, or the Root chakra which is why Reiki is having an open mind and body or in painful techniques.

If so, ask their help online for the benefit of Reiki.When I first learned Reiki, this system and is now in receipt of the most wonderful, free gifts you can send Reiki energy to it.If you have done research in places he/she has learned in one day...but you will be a regular basis.Most people notice it as a non invasive method which has been that much of energy healing.There are three skill levels of being, help a person all the levels can be done.

[nickgerlich]

What We Have Learned So Far

I remember back to the 1970s, when I was a mere teenager. My Dad the Accountant was also the purchasing agent for our family. It was a task in which he prided himself and his squeezing-blood-out-of-turnips ways. He shopped with ruthless cunning and laser precision. This explained why our basement had metal shelves lined with enough canned goods to get us through a nuclear fallout, because Dad was the kind of guy who would find corn on sale, and then buy the whole case.

My friends used to make fun of me. “Are you guys planning on World War III?” they would ask. Nope. Dad was just being a good shopper, so we shut up and ate corn.

But suddenly I realize that Dad was ahead of his time, while at the same time, a product of his times. He grew up during the Great Depression, so he knew the value of a nickel saved, a paper clip, piece of string, even an empty beer can with its top removed to use as a pencil holder. This is not just quaint nostalgic yearnings, it’s the new survival strategy. I suspect if you went into many American pantries these days, you would think my Dad had paid them a visit.

While the first documented US case of coronavirus happened on 20 January 2020, it wasn’t until the last two weeks that we really stood up and paid much attention here. In that short time, we have learned many things, about ourselves, about our society. Here are a few:

No one is happy right now. We are filled with anxiety. We’re stress-filled, and easily provoked by the littlest thing someone might do to us in public. I get it. When your world is turned upside down, it’s easy to take it out on others. Even though only a tiny tiny fraction of our 330 million people will contract COVID-19, there is still the chance it could happen. Given the fact that we are all told to stay home, one has to wonder what the social outcomes will be down the road. Will there be a baby boom next winter, as some chirpy people suggest? Or will the added stress lead to divorces? Worse yet, not if, but when, will there be shopping cart rage and shootings in shops as people fight over scarce commodities?

What we once took for granted, we may never do so again. Remember when we could go to a supermarket and they would have everything we needed? Yeah, me too…about two weeks ago. I remember my first semester at WT, when I had a young Polish emigre in my Principles of Marketing class. She told of life in the mother country, still reeling under years of an oppressive regime. She spoke of being overwhelmed by all the choices we had in America, because in Poland, it wasn’t about which bread, it was about whether there was any bread at all. If you saw a queue forming outside a store, you got in line without even knowing why you were there, under the assumption that someone knew something you did not, and you better not miss whatever was available.

How sad that we now think the same thing. We blindly get in line before opening hours in hopes that shelves have been restocked during the night.  And for that matter, every other aspect of our lives, from dining out to movie theatres, concerts, sporting events, and more, are all out the window right now. We have our Netflix, as long as they don’t cut the bandwidth to save the internet for everyone now engaged in online learning.


Cheap gas is nice, but if you can’t go anywhere, it is worthless. With a barrel of oil around $24, dealers are practically giving gas away. Today, you can get gas for $1.69 a gallon in Amarillo. The only problem is that, with so many people sent home to work, shops closed, and everyone hunkering down, there’s really nowhere to go other than the grocery. Oh, for fuel this cheap when we are able to take road trips. This is nothing but a false positive externality of the coronavirus crisis.

Agile companies and organizations will survive, while the others will be weeded out quickly. We will definitely lose a lot of businesses during this pandemic, especially mom-and-pop businesses. There are more businesses than we realize that are only one or two months away from bankruptcy, mirroring the condition of many citizens who are similarly skating by, month-to-month. Are you in the restaurant business? Why haven’t you considered takeaway before? Have a retail shop? Why haven’t you gone online yet with a commerce-driven website and/or mobile app? Teach at a university? Why haven’t you pushed yourself a little the last two decades by developing at least one online course?

Furthermore, this will cause many businesses, organizations, and even governments to reconsider how business is done, but only among those that survive. Does it necessarily have to be face-to-face? Why can’t it be done electronically? Does it have to be done the old way forever?

I do not need to eat out anywhere near as much as I once did. I have been moving in this direction for the last few months anyway in an effort to eat more healthily, as well as because I am enjoying teaching myself to cook. But with restaurants off-limits in most areas, and everyone my age being urged to have a month’s worth of provisions on hand, my pantry runneth over. And you know what? I am enjoying it. Even with my beginner’s skills and tools, I can put together a mighty tasty dinner. My oldest daughter often joins me in this endeavor, and she, better than I, produce some amazing meals. Guess what? We are saving money. We are eating very healthily. And I am losing weight. Lots of it. Yay, us! Of course, that’s bad news for the restaurants if they are able to survive this tragedy, because I may not return there as frequently as I once did.

Many more people are now getting exposure to e-commerce, curbside pick-up, and home delivery. This could forever change the way we buy things, making it difficult for those unable or unwilling to evolve. This goes far beyond the native convenience of it all, and even the social distancing aspect. I, for one, do not want to purchase items that have been handled, tried on, manipulated, etc., by others.

What people purchase during times of panic reflects their worst fears. Panic is irrationality at its worst. It causes us to do things completely out of character, and when it comes to purchasing, it causes us to buy things that make no sense whatsoever. The elephant in the living room right now is toilet paper. The coronavirus does not even cause diarrhea, so there’s no worry in that department, yet Americans and others worldwide have gobbled up virtually every available roll. One report I read said that we bought 60 days’ worth of toilet paper in three days. A standard 18-roll pack should last a minimum of one month, and quite possibly two months, in a two-person household.

So why did everyone hoard this most basic commodity? Simple. Because everyone fears having to take a dump and not having paper with which to wipe. Never mind starvation or more important matters; we just want to be clean down there. I want to be clean, too, but I’m not going to go crazy on inventorying it. A second fear is bottled water. Really? Unless our public utilities also break down, we’re going to have tap water. So picture this: We are a bunch of defecation dehydrophobes. I don’t like that mental picture.

The food people are buying reflects our rather pedestrian American cuisine, which also turns out to be our comfort foods. The American diet is a mash-up of various international influences and regionalized adaptations, along with some items of our own making. To be honest, I don’t think it is all that good. It is rather bland, favors sauces that happens to red, and probably puts more emphasis on the centerpiece—meat—than is healthy. But that’s a discussion for another time.

Folks are buying the things they know how to prepare, because going out to eat is out of the question unless you can live with takeaway, and people are buying the things that will provide comfort and hope during a time of discomfort and seeming hopelessness. If pounded steak and potatoes make you feel good, then by all means, eat it. It also means that my rather esoteric tastes and dietary preferences are pretty safe. This is one time that being in the minority has its benefits. All of my stuff is still abundant.

People will rearrange their schedules to go shopping if there is hope that a scarce item has been replenished overnight. When was the last time you went grocery shopping at 7:00am? I did it this week, and was not the least bit surprised to see about two dozen others out there, milling about in the pre-dawn moonlight. Many stores have now trimmed their operating hours to allow more time for thorough overnight cleanings and restocking, as well as to accommodate seniors-only shopping hours, but the long and the short of it is simple: We’ll do whatever it takes if we think we might find a roll of toilet paper or canister of Lysol. Think about this. Aside from Black Friday, when was the last time you engaged in cart-to-cart contact for a limited supply of products?

We are social animals, and we are already starting to miss each other. I can see it on social media already. We want…no, we need…human interactions, whether it is at church, the pub, the workplace, the classroom. All of those have been taken from us in short order, and it did not take long for us to feel that immense loss. Thankfully, we have social media to stay in touch, and inexpensive calling plans to just say hello. Reach out and touch your loved ones, maybe not physically, but at least electronically. It may be a while before we can hug, kiss, even shake hands. But we can still communicate.

There will always be defiant, belligerent people among us. This is the scariest part. There are many folks taking to social media trying to downplay the importance of this matter, dissing the statistics that shows this to be a highly communicable disease with a much higher mortality rate than the common flu. Worst yet, I have seen some of my former students echoing these refrains online. Now more than ever we must use reasoning and logic to filter through the news, all of it, from real to fake. This is a very real contagion that can grow exponentially if left unabated. Interventions of the highest order are necessary to throw speed bumps in its growth. This is not a conspiracy from any political party; it is a global pandemic that knows no borders nor ideologies. Don’t blow off the truth; don’t dig your heels in the dirt and embrace nonsense claptrap that ignores the magnitude of this situation.

We use social media to vent our frustrations and anxieties. And argue. It is sadly ironic that the very tool intended to bring people together has also made it possible for oceans of discontent to rage between us. Give someone a microphone, and suddenly they feel like they are back in high school debate. But more than that, I see raw emotions in people’s posts…the empty shelves, the shuttered stores, the empty parking lots. The mere act of photographing, composing a caption, and posting them is cathartic in that it lets us release those pent up emotions. My advice going forward: skip the arguing, but keep posting your photos and words. If anything, we are all now citizen journalists documenting history in the making. Can you imagine nearly everyone in 1918 had a decent camera in their pocket or purse, and snapped hundreds of photos of the pandemic that year? We would have a much better record had this all been available. We do, so keep shooting and posting.

Finally, we need to love our educators. They have all been forced to do things they may or may not know anything about as they transition to online. For some, it has been easy. For others, it is like being thrust from knowing miles, pounds, and quarts, and suddenly having to use kilometers, kilograms, and liters. We are doing our best to make sure the learning continues, with or without the comforts of the classroom. We all have to make the best of the situation. And I offer encouragement to students for whom online learning is unfamiliar. It’s not perfect, but neither is the classroom. Keep an open mind, and trust your educator. We’re not doing this for ourselves.

I know that I could go on, and there is certainly much more we will learn in the days and weeks ahead. And that’s right—weeks. I am not hopeful that we will return to what we consider to be normal for quite some time. This is the new normal. All I know is that my dad was right. Life could get tough again, maybe not quite like it was in the 1930s, but certainly a far cry from what we all know as the American way. In the end, though, it will make us tougher. Our steely resolve will help us get through this, and prepare us for whatever the future may hold. 



Now who wants some corn?

Dr “Going The Distance“ Gerlich

Audio Blog

[jaytury-blog]

10 Signs You Were An Emo Kid

So one thing we’re all guilty of is going through childhood phases that we’re pretty embarrassed to talk about. Whether that being the geeky kid that essentially fantasized over Warhammer figurines to the kid that liked to eat the whiteboard pen in class. We’ve all been there guaranteed, and along the way we’ve picked up and dropped some pretty weird habits and traits. But I’m not here to reminisce about the stickmen animations I used to create on PowerPoint, that’s for another time. This article is aimed more towards those little cliques we found ourselves in during our early school years; cliques which pretty much evolved and shaped our tiny little fragile minds. Our worlds soon opened up and offered things we never even knew existed, whether that being a new weird friend or a music genre that sent shivers down our spines for the first time. It’s true, at some point during our tween years most of us ventured into certain factions, sometimes not by choice, but by fate. Cliques are forever changing and for the life of me I can’t keep track of what they are these days. Something about roadmen and plastics maybe? That rings some sort of bell anyway, who knows? But if you were like me and facing secondary school in the mid-2000’s, then you were most likely left with a choice of two factions, both of which stood at complete opposite ends of the scale. Ladies and gentlemen, may I present, the Chav, and the Emo. Sworn enemies until the dying days of the earth. Perhaps you were one of these and can openly admit it and even laugh about it. Or maybe you’re just too ashamed to confess that this phase was in fact a part of your development as a teen. Maybe you’re in denial. I won’t judge you. The fact is, these factions were a real thing back then, and although the Chav outlived the Emo, we can still learn to laugh and reminisce about those crazy scene days that once ruled our lives each day. So let’s do that. Let’s talk about the old days and what defined ‘The Emo Kid’ May I present to you, 10 Signs You Were An Emo Kid 1. YOU HATED EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING So I’ll start off with the obvious one here, and that is that you most likely hated everyone you knew, minus your other Emo comrades of course. I’ll just come out and say this, but did you hate your teacher? Your parents? Your pets for no particular reason? Did they do something you didn’t like, regardless of how little it was? Was their smiles too wide for your everyday mundane life? If you answered yes, then great – you were on your way to Emo-hood. However this one was strange, because deep down I know you probably didn’t hate everyone, but simply because you had the persona of a gravestone and came off as friendly as a brick wall you just kind of stuck with the hatred of positivity. Ever see the Emo kid that always smiled? No? That’s because they weren’t a real Emo kid. A real Emo kid would have kept their heads down, muttered obscenities at anyone breathing that wasn’t one of your friends. You hated everyone through and through, and regardless of what the world had done, you made sure THEY were the problem, not you. 2. THE FRINGE Oh, the fringe; the trademark of the Emo kid that everyone had. You probably reached this point early on and decided if you were going to make it with the opposite sex then you needed to rock the cringe fringe 24/7. Day in, day out you would style your hair for hours, straightening it and burning the hell out of the ends until it was just long enough to cover one eye. The longer your fringe, the cooler you were. That’s just how it was for some reason. It of course, being like your personality, had to be blacker than the soul and thicker than moose’s blood. Your fringe was your baby, and if you wasn’t spending at least half the day correcting it and keeping on top of obscuring one eye then you weren’t a very good Emo kid. Hair was everything, plain and simple.

3. THE STUDDED BELT AND RED SKINNIES

That, as well as the other insane things you used to ‘rock’ like the fingerless gloves or black and

white chequered hoodies.

Whatever you wore, you made sure it was branded with Blue Banana, because that’s essentially the only retailer that did awesome enough stuff for your Emo requirements.

If you were a guy, you thought you could pull off guyliner better than any chick you knew, and no matter the occasion or how far away from your bed you had to go that day, you made sure your eyes were thicker than a pandas regardless.

Before leaving home you made sure you had AT LEAST two studded belts, both diagonally crossed and fastened through only one hole on your jeans.

As for the girls, a not so sturdy pair of fishnet stockings were on the essentials, oh, and also a spare pair to cover your bloody arms for some reason.

Bracelets and bracelets, so many damn bracelets filled your skin right up to your elbows, and why? Maybe to cover the…*cough cough*

Moving on.

4. YOU CAPTIONED EVERYTHING WITH ‘RAWR!’

To this day I still don’t understand it, but maybe you do.

Back in the day when Bebo was alive and everyone used to obsess over mirror selfies with their Sony Ericsson phones, the dinosaur was an iconic thing to the Emo kids.

Don’t ask me why, I don’t have an answer for it.

You used to hold one hand out like a claw and have a mouth like Clint Eastwood, slightly open and aggressive like you were about to annihilate a herbivore.

Each photo had to be angled perfectly just so you’d see the several lip piercings you gathered over the last year or so, and if you could sneak in a tongue piercing somewhere you were at the peak of your image, truly.

You also made sure to ‘own’ everyone else’s photo’s too, which never actually accounted for anything at all.

Thought someone was hot? Comment ‘I own this’ and some incredible thing happened. Nobody knew what the thing was, but it happened alright.

You owned the hottest pics of the day, and it literally meant zilch. Congratulations, you achieved nothing.

5. EMOTION WAS EVERYTHING

If you weren’t a tween basket case going through a mental breakdown for two years straight then you weren’t an Emo kid.

If you broke a smile more than twice a day you were considered one of the happy kids with a happy life and make-believe fairy parents. But if you were a true Emo then you honestly believed your life was the worst thing ever in existence. The world could collapse beneath our feet and it still wouldn’t even put a dent in your day-to-day life.

If you weren’t fighting off the make-believe depression you tried so hard to land yourself with then you were trying to find it, just so you could fight it all over again.

Every day was an emotional rollercoaster for you, and so long as you walked in your Vans shoes, the black cloud would slowly follow behind.

Everything was just terrible, utterly bloody terrible.

Cat died? Terrible.

Girlfriend left? Terrible.

Bus late? Terrible.

No mayo on your sandwich? Terrible.

Your life was just terrible, wasn’t it?

6. THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY

So nine times out of ten we dated someone in our social circle, because deep down we felt the connection more and the sparks ignited slightly easier knowing they were just as Emo as you were.

Maybe it’s because you saw them every single day and considered them a friend already, and for that reason, a relationship was on the cards.

Chances are you dated a few people in your group, because let’s face it, when you’re fifteen and open to experimentation for the first time, you’re willing to just go out with everyone to get an idea of how everything works.

Like there was always that one quiet kid who was into the dodgiest stuff that caught you off guard, and if you ever found yourself in a relationship with that certain individual then you’ll know exactly what I mean. It’s weird.

But then there’s the one that got away, the other half of the jigsaw that quite literally ‘rocked your world’ and completed your black little heart. We’ve all been there, I know we have.

A decent length for a relationship back then was about five or six months, but to you that was like an eternity. It was so sacred that everyone knew about it. You were the ‘in couple’ of the crowd. Just how you liked it.

But kids being kids things eventually went spiralling out of control and plummeted to the ground, making you realise how screwed up your world was all over again.

Things ended for a crazy reason you could laugh about these days, but back then you felt like your whole world had come crashing to the ground.

Initiating Emo breakdown number eight thousand and twenty-one.

7. YOU HAD FOUR BANDS ON YOUR MP3 PLAYER

I’ll give this one a straight shot in the dark and you tell me how close I am to hitting home, okay?

Ahem, *cracks fingers*

1. My Chemical Romance

2. Panic At The Disco!

3. Fall Out Boy

4. Linkin Park

Yes? No? Spot on?

Well that was me anyway, and I know for a fact you had at least one of those bands on your crappy little MP3 player at school. Those and a few songs you heard from friends but didn’t quite know the band, so just referred to them as ‘songs that speak to me on a personal level’.

You and a million other Emo kids.

The lyrics were identical to the pain you were feeling on a day to day basis, and if you felt the warm throbbing in your heart when the first piano note of Black Parade played, then you were a part of the 95% of Emo kids that felt the passion for the music aspect of the scene. This was your go-to anthem when somebody asked what music genre you were into. Period.

You were the frontman of the Black Parade every day of the week.

8. YOU PROBABLY HUNG OUT UNDER A BRIDGE

Now I’m not saying you were a gremlin that loitered under a bridge, but you probably did have a hangout spot similar to that, didn’t you? Perhaps the town square that consisted of two benches and a pound shop. Maybe a church cemetery to match the dark aura you surrounded yourself in?

For me it was the town square, which funnily enough consisted of two benches and a pound shop. It was cheap and convenient, and I spent more hours sat there loitering than I did in my own home. If I had spare time, I was there. Smoking, drinking, and overall being a general public enemy to the elderly and working generations.

Shock horror it later budged to the nearby cathedral, because we eventually discovered that the more death surrounding us, the more Emo we were.

If it rained you’d find me cupped under the roof of a Debenhams store, sat in line with thirty other kids thinking we were the coolest dropouts in the county.

We later on figured out we weren’t. We were just a nuisance and an inconvenience for those trying to gain access to the doors of Debenhams.

But maybe this rings true for you as well? Did you have one of these hangout spots? Did you have an Emo home away from home?

9. BEBO. MSN. TUMBLR.

Tumblr, Tumblr, Tumblr – this was your life indoors. This was your second-life where you could break out of your shell without actually having to interact with anyone. If someone asked you you’re hobbies, you’d tell them ‘Tumblr’ and nothing else.

It was a place for you to express yourself through various captioned pictures and dark gruesome quotations. It was your way of saying, “I’m edgy, so what?”

If your Tumblr wasn’t plastered with pictures of Pete Wentz or Gerard Way then you weren’t cool, because those guys were heroes in your books. They were the definition of ‘Rawr’ or something along those lines.

Bebo was of course where it all started, before Facebook became the in-thing and dominated the social market. It was a place to share ‘luv’ and post your classic mirror selfies to the world. You probably had some edgy black profile theme with sparkly skulls and chessboard patterns, right? That’s because you were Emo, and you wanted the world to know it.

MSN was basically Facebook Messenger or WhatsApp except it had all those old quirky school features like webcam chats and classic emoji’s. Plus the cool thing with MSN was you could just have some crazy name like ‘Dark Life <3 Girlfriend <3 RAWR!’ and nobody batted an eyelid. That was just the norm, and it was perfect.

If you spent all your time indoors flicking between the three tabs of the above sites, then there’s a strong chance you were a textbook Emo kid.

10. YOU DESPISED THE CHAV KIDS

If like me you cringed at words like ‘Bruv’ and ‘Danz’ then you probably shared the strong hatred towards the Chavvy kids in school. Unfortunately they took up about eighty percent of the playground, and sadly for the Emo kids, they were unavoidable when trying to go about your day in peace.

You know the kids I’m talking about. The ones who usually wore tracksuits and hand-me-down Reebok classics. They’d usually try and boot a football in your direction if they so much as saw your fringe wave in the wind.

They’d be there when you crossed the field, they’d be there waiting outside your classroom, and they’d be there when you left the school gates at the end of the day. They were always around, doing whatever it took to ruin your day and boast to their mates.

To put it short, they were vile creatures that took pleasure in making your day even worse than it already was.

The Chav’s and the Emo’s were two factions always at war with one another. Two complete opposite ends of the scale. Different music, different hobbies, different vocabulary – everything.

You skate, they kick a ball. You bang your head to MCR, they punch the wall to N-Dubz.

Everything about the two factions was messy, and although they often say opposites attract, this was a case that never would come close without starting a fight.

Chav kids were what made school days so gruelling and dark, but you pushed through in whatever way you could. You stuck by your friends and mocked them from behind the filter of a cigarette. You said nothing and kept your head down, but whilst the fire was dimly lit, the coal was most definitely still burning.

In the end, the Chav outlived the Emo, but I’d like to say we had the last laugh. Because whilst we were socially beneath them in school, we managed to climb above them and realise a phase was just a phase and it was time to grow up in the end. We weren’t thirteen anymore. We were getting older and the greying hairs were inevitable.

The masses of Blue Banana clothing died out and became just like everybody else; mostly suits and ties sadly enough.

The Emo within may not hold as strong a presence anymore, but deep down I know some of us sure as hell still rock out to Black Parade on a regular basis. It’s a piece of us that’ll never die.

The Chavvy phase continues to grow, sometimes into people’s late thirties and beyond.

But the Emo kids will always be able to smile knowing full well they aspired to be more.

The Emo kid may have died in reality, but it will never for once be forgotten in our hearts.

…That is something a true Emo would say. *

So, were you an Emo kid?

Share your memories from this beautiful era below and allow the dark child within you to re-emerge for a while.

Emo kids unite!

- J Tury