#there were so many things i wanted to mention but. it would have been a novel.

[ghostedgwen]

Hiii I adore ur James fic but we need more Moony! what if reader is Remus' childhood friend and they have been attached at the hip until he met the Marauders and once they've graduated she becomes a Potioneer and basically invents the Wolfsbane Potion and when he finds out it was invented by her they meet again and she admits she invented it for him could end up vaguely platonic but you can also make it full on Remus x reader up to you!! thanks!!xx!!!!

never too late | r.lupin

note : Hello anon, thank you for this lovely request!! Been thinking about this request a lot and finally got around to writing it while I was looking after my sick wife. Yall seem to enjoy my really long fics so here's 6k words for Remus <3

warnings : childhood friends drifting apart, some angst with comfort, mentions of Remus' werewolf struggles, Remus as a cane user, very very slow burn sorry

Remus was a childhood friend you slowly drifted apart with, he had the Marauders and you had Potion books. Years later, you did the impossible of inventing Wolfsbane Potion, he thought it was the best time to reach out.

You never thought Hogwarts would feel so far away from home.

The boat rocks gently under your legs as lanterns sway above the water, casting warm reflections across the lake. Around you, the other first years whisper excitedly, pointing at the silhouette of the castle glowing in the distance. But your eyes aren’t on the castle. They’re on the boy sitting across from you - Remus Lupin, your best friend since you were barely old enough to hold a wand.

He doesn’t speak. He rarely does when he's nervous. His fingers twist the sleeves of his robes, and the shadows under his eyes are darker than usual. Most people wouldn’t notice. But you do. You've always noticed things about Remus.

You grew up together in Whispermere, a quiet magical village tucked between a haunted wood and an old apothecary. The kind of place where magic hummed through the stones and gossip moved faster than broomsticks. There were never many children, so the two of you became a pair soinseparable, like a matched set of spellbooks.

When you were eight, you figured it out. The absences, the injuries, the nights when his house went silent and the air felt heavy with something unspoken. And one day, he finally admitted it.

“I’m a monster,” he whispered, curled on the floor of your room after the worst full moon you’d ever seen him return from.

You remember the rage that sparked in you. Not at him - never at him, but rather, at the world.

“You’re not a monster,” you said, voice steady even though your hands were shaking. “You’re just Remus. That’s enough.”

He didn’t believe it, not then. Maybe he still doesn’t, but you meant it.

You always have.

Now, as the boats drift toward the stone docks and the castle towers above you like a dream, your fingers brush against his. You squeeze gently, a silent reminder: I’m still here.

Inside, the Great Hall takes your breath away with its floating candles, enchanted ceiling, golden plates that shine even without food on them yet. It’s everything you imagined and more. Everything you have read paled in comparison.

Then names are called.

One by one, first years step forward, trembling under the Sorting Hat’s scrutiny.

And then -  “_______, _____”

You turn to Remus and try to smile, but your chest feels like it’s caving in.

“Wish me luck,” you whisper.

He nods. “You don’t need it.”

You sit on the stool. The Sorting Hat drops onto your head, and immediately a voice purrs in your ear.

“Well, aren’t you an interesting one… Clever, sharp, fiercely loyal. Curious about everything. You’d do well in Hufflepuff. Maybe even Gryffindor... but no, you don’t just want to be brave. You need answers. You want to understand the why behind everything. And that, dear one, means only one thing…”

A pause. You feel the Hat probing something deeper.

“You’re thinking about someone else… the Lupin boy. Hmm. Very protective, I see.”

“He’s my best friend,” you think fiercely. “I want to stay close to him.”

The Hat chuckles, deep and amused. “A noble thought. But you’ll both need to grow. Apart, if you must. Don’t fear it. You’ll find your way.”

Then, aloud, it shouts: “RAVENCLAW!”

You slide off the stool, applause ringing in your ears. The Ravenclaw table welcomes you with warm smiles and curious glances. But your eyes scan the room, following Remus as he soon takes his turn.

The Hat takes longer this time. You bite your lip.

Then - “GRYFFINDOR!”

He looks toward you, unsure. You give him a thumbs-up and a grin that doesn’t quite reach your eyes. You’d promised to stick together, but Hogwarts, it seems, had its own plans.

Weeks pass. You find your place among the Ravenclaws, high in their airy tower. You answer riddles to get into your common room and lose yourself in books, ancient spells, and strange magical theories. It suits you, in its way.

But you miss him.

You make time where you can - which is between classes, after curfew, beside the Black Lake under starlight. He’s always tired after the full moon, always quiet. You notice the fresh scars even when he tries to hide them under long sleeves.

You’re always the first to notice, you doubt there’s a detail you’d miss when it came to him. 

Then he makes new friends. James Potter. Sirius Black. Peter Pettigrew. Loud boys with loud laughs and even louder personalities. They’re always getting into trouble, always pulling Remus into it. And he lets them.

You don’t blame him. Not really. But sometimes, when you see him laughing with Sirius or whispering to James during class, something tightens in your chest.

They don’t know, not like you do, and they could never.

One evening, you meet him by the lake. You sit in silence, watching the ripples in the water. The moon is almost full.

“They don’t know, do they?” you ask, finally.

He flinches. “No.”

“Do you want them to?”

“No,” he says quickly. Then softer, “I don’t want them to look at me and be afraid they’re sleeping with a monster.”

You nod, lips pressed together. “You’re not a monster, Rem, you don’t have to pretend either when you’re with me.”

He sighs, shoulders slumping. “I’m not pretending. I’m just… trying.”

“You’re still you, Remus,” you say. “And I still see you. Even when no one else does.”

He doesn’t answer at first. Then, “Sometimes I think you see too much.”

“Someone has to.”

He looks at you, really looks, and for a moment everything else fades - the Houses, the castle, the distance. He’s still the boy from Whispermere, hiding from the world in your attic, clutching your hand after the worst nights of his life.

“Thank you,” he murmurs.

You smile. “Always.”

And in that moment, you know: it doesn’t matter what the Hat said, or where you sleep, or what friends you make. You’re still his anchor, and he’s still yours.

Even if the world tries to pull you apart, even if the moon rises and falls and tries to make him something else - you’ll always be there, reminding him of who he is.

Not a monster. Just Remus, and that’s more than enough.

You knew things would never be the same the moment you got sorted into different houses, but you hadn’t expected it to happen right in second year. The first-year, he was stuck to you somehow his budding friendship with his dorm mates.

Only, this year, it’s different. It happens slowly, the way most changes do. A missed lunch here, a half-written letter there. The space between you and Remus doesn’t appear all at once. It drips in like rain under a cracked window, which is quiet, subtle, and easy to ignore at first.

You tell yourself it’s normal. You’re in different houses. You have different classes, different friends. He has James, Sirius, and Peter now - boys who’ve somehow wrapped themselves around his days like ivy on stone. You’re happy he’s laughing more. You want him to have people.

Still, there are times it stings.

You see them in the courtyard, shoulders pressed together as they whisper about some prank or plan or whatever mischief they’re always knee-deep in. Remus laughs at something James says, head thrown back, the sound real and full and bright.

It should make you happy. It does, but only to some extent. You supposed it was childish, because you are a child, but sometimes, you wish he’d laugh like that with you again.

You still have your moments. After all, some things don’t change.

Full moons still come. And Remus still suffers.

He tells them he’s visiting his “sick mother” or going home for the weekends, but on weekdays he’ll just be sick and staying in the hospital wing. The Marauders, to their credit, don’t press. Not yet.

But you know the truth, you knew it was only a matter of time before they found out. Before Remus shines a light on that he so badly wishes wasn’t true.

You sneak out on those nights, Invisibility Cloak or not. Madam Pomfrey has stopped scolding you when she finds you curled in the chair beside his bed in the hospital wing. You’ve been doing this for years now, long before Hogwarts.

Sometimes you stay awake all night, watching the slow rise and fall of his chest, the faint shimmer of silver scars healing across his arms. Sometimes you just hold his hand and wait for the shaking to stop.

You bring chocolate, potions from your own stash, and books he pretends to be too tired to read but always opens the second you leave.

There is no miracle potion yet. Nothing to make it easier. But there was you, so you stay.

Because love - whatever kind of love this is - means showing up. Especially when it’s hard.

“You don’t have to do this, you know,” he tells you one morning, voice hoarse and broken around the edges.

You hand him a warm compress and raise an eyebrow. “You say that every time.”

“And you ignore it every time.”

“Because it’s a stupid thing to say.”

He lets out a dry laugh that turns into a cough. “I mean it. You’ve got other friends. Classes. You don’t need to spend your nights watching me bleed all over the bed.”

You sit beside him, brushing his hair back gently. “No, I don’t need to. I want to. That’s different.”

He doesn’t look at you. He’s gotten good at that lately. He used to always meet your eyes, no shame in that now that you have seen everything he had to offer. Hogwarts seemed to have changed a lot between you and him.

After a while, you ask, “Why don’t you tell them?”

He stiffens. “Tell who?”

“You know who. Potter, Black and Pettigrew. Your little chaos club.”

“They’re not - ” He stops, then sighs. “It’s not that simple.”

“Why not?”

He rubs a hand over his face. “Because if they find out, they’ll look at me differently. Or worse, they’ll stop looking at me at all.”

“You don’t know that.”

He meets your eyes then. “You don’t know what it’s like. To be this. To be something people fear.”

“No,” you say gently. “But I know what it’s like to watch someone I care about tear themselves apart for being something they can’t control.”

That shuts him up. He hates how you know exactly which words to use, what to say, how to say it. He hates how he can’t resist the warmth you offer, even at the tender age of 13, Remus knew that craving you and your comfort was not good.

He couldn’t depend on you so much. You’ve been enduring full moons with him since you both were 8, it would be too unfair to demand you keep doing it forever. Hogwarts is a new era, a new start. 

You squeeze his hand. “You don’t have to tell them now. But you can’t keep carrying this alone forever.”

He’s quiet for a long time.

Then, softly: “I’m not carrying it alone.”

You smile at that. It’s the first real smile you’ve had in days, and right then and there - wall has barely built.

Still, the distance continues.

You write him notes in class and find them folded carefully in his bag later, but he rarely writes back. You sit by him at meals when you can, but more often he’s wedged between Sirius’ smirks and James’ flying stories.

He doesn’t mean to leave you behind. That’s what makes it harder.

Because he’s not cruel. Just… busy. Distracted, even. Caught in the glow of something new and good and easy, and you? You’re the constant. The one who patches him up in secret, who carries the burden he’s still too scared to share with anyone else.

You wonder sometimes what would happen if you stopped showing up, but you already know the answer. You never would, you could never do that to him.

One night, weeks after a particularly brutal full moon, you find him on the Astronomy Tower, arms crossed against the wind, eyes trained on the stars like they might have answers.

You step up beside him.

“They asked again,” he says without turning.

“About the absences?”

He nods.

“What did you say?”

“That I get migraines. Bad ones. I said I needed quiet.”

You lean against the wall beside him. “You think they bought it?”

He shrugs. “James looked like he wanted to argue. Sirius just nodded.”

“They’re not stupid, Remus. They’re going to figure it out eventually.”

“Yeah,” he whispers. “I know.”

You glance at him. “What then?”

He doesn’t answer.

You rest your chin on your arms. “They’re your friends. They care about you. Maybe they’d surprise you.”

He gives you a look, half amused, half broken. “You always believe the best in people.”

“No,” you say. “Just in you.”

He turns away, blinking hard. He tries not to think too much about it and you try to act like it never held much weight than intended.

You know he’s scared. You also know that trust doesn’t come easy when your entire life has been a series of closed doors and hidden scars. So you keep showing up.

In the quiet moments. In the hospital wing. In the spaces between his laughter with the Marauders and the silences that follow the moon. You stay.

Because even if he doesn’t say it, even if he forgets sometimes, you know he needs you.

The Marauders became legends long before you realized you’d been left behind.

It started innocently with little tricks, charmed ink, floating teacups in the Great Hall. But by fourth year, it was chaos on demand. James and Sirius led the charge, Peter cheered from the sidelines, and Remus followed behind with that half-smile he wore when he was trying not to be complicit.

He was never the loudest. But he was always there and you had no doubt that a majority of the pranks were his ideas with that brilliant imagination of his.

And you? You were somewhere else entirely.

You’d fallen in love with Potions during your third year. You were completely taken by it, it was constant - it was measured and specific, you will only go wrong if you do it wrong, you liked the assurance in that. The discipline of it, the balance. The quiet language of simmering and stillness. The way ingredients interacted like people. Some enhanced each other. Some repelled. Some needed careful handling or they’d break.

You understood that. You didn't mind the solitude. Not at first.

You still saw him, of course. Shared looks across the Great Hall. A nod in passing between classes. He still sought you out during full moons - less often now, but enough to remind you that something tethered you together, even if the rope frayed more each year.

Then came fifth year.

It was a brutal moon. You knew it before the term started. You’d read the cycle and seen how close the eclipse would fall. Too long in wolf form. Too little recovery time.

You were already waiting when Madam Pomfrey carried him in, bleeding and half-conscious, his leg at a wrong angle and the smell of blood in his clothes. He was fevered for days. You didn’t leave.

But when he finally woke, cane leaning beside his bed and the weight of reality setting into his body like cold iron, something inside him snapped.

You remember it too clearly.

“Remus,” you said, gently wrapping the bandage around his hip. “You’re going to need to rest for a while. Let your body catch up.”

He looked away. “I’m fine.”

“You’re not.”

“You don’t get to say that.”

Your hands froze. “I’m just trying to help.”

“I don’t want your help,” he snapped, voice raw. “I don’t need you watching over me like some sad nursemaid waiting for the broken boy to fall apart. I don’t need your pity.”

The silence that followed was sharp enough to cut bone.

You stood slowly, heart loud in your ears. “It’s not pity, Remus. It never was.”

He didn’t look at you. He couldn’t then, he was too drunk on his pain to really consider you and your words, as well as his own.

You left without another word.

He apologized two days later. He limped to where you sat in the library, cane in hand, eyes rimmed with sleepless regret.

“I didn’t mean it,” he said, quietly. “I was angry, and scared. Not at you… never at you.”

You nodded, nudging the empty seat beside you, which he took.

“I know,” you said.

And you did. You forgave him. Of course you did, it was hard not to when it was Remus. But the wound between you stayed, despite you forgiving him. It might have been the first real crack in the relationship that never fully went away.

You passed each other in the corridors and shared tired smiles. Sometimes, you sat beside each other in the hospital wing in silence, both knowing you’d never quite find your way back to where you’d been.

Seventh year came faster than you expected. Your N.E.W.T.s consumed you - Potions, Transfiguration, Transfiguration. You poured yourself into your studies like they were the only things still within your control.

Remus, meanwhile, was surrounded by noise. Always someone beside him, always laughing, always planning something with parchment and ink-stained hands. He was loved, admired even. And you were happy for him.

Throughout the years he grew to be a Remus that was nowhere near the one you knew. He got tattoos, piercings too and you would even see him smoke in the Gryffindor common room parties you’d be dragged into attending.

You never really spoke there, just exchanged greetings and then off you were to mingle with your usual circle while he stuck close to his Gryffindor lot.

Outside of common room parties, you spoke now and then. Swapped books, and would even shared tea on a rainy afternoon near the end of spring term. But it wasn’t the same. It wasn’t the attic in Whispermere. It wasn’t late-night confessions or moonlit truths. It was… polite.

But sometimes, he’d look at you like he was remembering something. Something he thought he lost, and you’d smile gently, pretending not to feel it.

Graduation came not so long after.

You stood in a sea of students in dress robes and polished shoes. The sky was too blue. Your throat too tight. All you could think was: This is the end of something we forgot to finish.

After the ceremony, he found you standing alone by the edge of the courtyard, clutching your acceptance letter from the Potions Guild. It was everything you worked so hard for, yet you didn’t feel as accomplished.

“So,” he said, softly. “St. Mungo’s or lab work?”

You looked up at him. The sun caught his hair. He still leaned on the cane sometimes, out of habit more than need now.

“Both,” you said. “They offered me a hybrid apprenticeship. Field work and brewing. It’s… everything I wanted.”

He smiled, and it was real. “You deserve that. You always did.”

“What about you?” you asked. “Still planning to be underpaid and overworked for the Ministry?”

“Sadly,” he said, smirking. “I think that’s the werewolf-friendly career track.”

You both laughed, and it almost felt normal again.

Then came the pause. The one that wrapped around everything you hadn’t said for years. Seven years ago, he was yours - in all the ways that mattered, and yet he couldn’t be farther from that now.

“I’m proud of you,” he said, voice quieter. “I never told you that enough.”

You blinked hard. “You didn’t have to. I always knew.”

Another silence. This one longer. More final. You allowed yourself to sit through it no matter how much it stings.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “For pulling away. For ruining what we had.”

“You didn’t ruin it,” you whispered. “We just… grew differently. That’s not anyone’s fault.”

He nodded, eyes shining. “Still. I never forgot what you were to me.”

You stepped forward, brushing his sleeve gently. “I’ll always be here, Remus. Maybe not beside you, but… you’ll never be alone. Not really.”

He looked at you like he wanted to say a thousand things. Instead, he just said, “Thank you.”

And then he hugged you, arms around your shoulders, his chin in your hair. For a moment, you were kids again, hiding from storms, trading secrets, pretending the world couldn’t touch you.

Then you let go.

And you both walked into the rest of your lives.

Apart.

Not exactly best friends like you once were. But never strangers.

You hadn’t set out to cure werewolves. That was a lost cause.

In truth, you hadn’t even set out to be a name anyone outside a medical conference would know. All you ever wanted was to understand. To fix what broke, to ease what hurt.

Maybe it started with Remus - those early days at Hogwarts, when he’d stumble into the hospital wing torn apart by the moon. Maybe it was the way he tried to hide the pain, or the way he smiled like it cost him something. You’d sat beside his bed too many nights to count, watching him sleep with clenched fists and a furrowed brow.

You’d never forgotten the way he looked at you after his worst full moon - fifth year, cane by the bed, his voice sharp with shame.

"I don’t want your pity."

That stayed with you. Not as a wound, but a weight. A suffocating reminder.

So no, you hadn’t started out trying to change the world. You were just trying to make it a little easier for someone like him to live in it.

And somewhere along the way, you did.

St. Mungo’s had offered you an apprenticeship the summer after graduation. A split program which consisted of two days a week in the field and three in the Potions wing. You’d taken it eagerly, diving into your studies with the same quiet focus you’d had at Hogwarts.

But the moment you had freedom to choose your own research, you knew what your first project would be.

Lycanthropy.

The transformations. The injuries. The trauma.

The stigma.

There were no quick fixes, no clean solutions. The thing resisted almost everything. Existing treatments were garbage, if they were even treatments, almost none existed due to the image painted of werewolves in the wizarding society.

The werewolf's body changed, but the tragedy was in the mind. The slipping of identity. The violent erasure of the person inside.

So you studied. And you failed. And you studied more. And you kept failing.

You burned through ingredients, scorched cauldrons, collapsed more than one test dummy with unstable fumes. You didn’t care, you pushed on.

There were whispers around the lab. That you were obsessed. That you should focus on safer, more respectable branches of medicine. That lycanthropy was a curse and werewolves are scary creatures that kill without reason.

They said it wasn’t worth pursuing and their scrutiny almost drowned you.

But you remembered Remus. And that was reason enough too keep going, to keep fighting for a world that he won’t be pushing people away in fear that they’d see all the ugly and run away.

It took three years to get your first successful result.

By then you were twenty-one, exhausted, and running on tea and stubbornness. But the batch worked - just barely. It stabilized the subject’s mental state for nine full minutes during the transformation. Nine minutes of lucidity, control. Enough to test again.

You built from there.

Nine became fourteen. Fourteen became thirty. Eventually, you crossed the hour mark - and then something clicked.

It was monkshood. That had always been obvious. But it wasn’t the only key. It was how it mixed with valerian, how the infusion had to be added at exactly 74 degrees Celsius, how the brew had to be stirred counterclockwise before sunrise.

A thousand tiny details. None of them obvious. But together?

Together, they became the thing.

You cried when the final test subject looked up after the full moon and said, “I remember everything. I didn’t lose myself.”

It was a werewolf volunteer, a girl a bit older than you are named Lyka. She had short blonde hair that was curled in coils and her eyes were a piercing grey in colour, she was reserved and strong. She volunteered for the tests right away.

You think she also held out hope to see the future you had envisioned, so she endured the tests however dangerous they may be and you both pushed through and jumped over numerous hurdles.

She’s become somewhat of a friend to you all these years. You even trusted her with stories of Remus, of the boy who was behind everything you’ve been building towards.

And when the press finally got hold of the announcement, you didn’t hide. You didn’t let the hospital PR team bury your name in a headline. You stood in front of the flashbulbs and the questions and said clearly, proudly:

“My name is ______, and I created the Wolfsbane Potion.”

You didn’t stutter, nor did you blink once.

You just thought: Remus. I hope you see this.

He did.

Remus Lupin had not cried since he was seventeen.

Not when he’d graduated. Not when he’d buried his parents at the ripe age of 19. Not even when he’d broken up with someone who said she “couldn’t live with the risk.”

But he nearly cried in the Potter living room the moment he saw your face on the front page of The Daily Prophet.

It had been a peaceful morning. James and Lily’s home which happens to be Potter Manor was warm, lively with the sound of baby Harry’s hiccupy giggles and Sirius humming off-key in the kitchen. Remus had dropped by with a stack of paperwork and a worn copy of Beedle the Bard - a gift for Harry, who immediately drooled on it with affection.

They were laughing over tea when Peter stumbled in, windblown and pink-cheeked.

“Sorry, sorry, I’m late,” Peter said, shrugging off his cloak. “Weather’s foul. Couldn’t apparate in these weathers.”

He dropped a bundle of newspapers on the table, along with a bag of jam tarts. Remus reached for a tart without thinking, flipping the top newspaper toward him.

Peter, halfway through unwrapping a sweetroll, said casually, “Isn’t that your mate from school?”

Remus glanced down.

His hand stopped.

There you were - front and centre, smiling widely and proudly. Not some blurry byline photo or a profile sketch. A real picture, wand in one hand, flask of potion in the other, hair pulled back. Behind you was a cauldron bubbling away.

It was all too staged if he were being honest.

BREAKTHROUGH IN LYCANTHROPY TREATMENT: WOLFSBANE POTION CREATED BY FORMER HOGWARTS STUDENT

Remus’s heart kicked like it remembered how.

The article’s subhead read: ‘I wanted to create something that could preserve identity. Lycanthropy shouldn’t be a life sentence.’

He read your name, printed boldly beneath the headline. It was written in full. You had claimed it all.

Lily noticed first. “Remus?”

He didn’t look up.James tilted the paper so he could see. “Bloody hell. That’s _____, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Remus said. His voice was quiet.

Peter blinked. “Wait, you know her?” He barely remembers you from school.

“I grew up with her,” Remus replied. “We were friends. Best friends. For a long time.”

Sirius leaned against the table. “And now she’s apparently a genius.”

“She always was,” Remus murmured, a small smile tugging at his lips.

He stepped outside soon after, briefly, to get some fresh air.

It had been four years. Four years since Hogwarts. Four years since you’d spoken beyond the occasional stiff letter or exchanged holiday greetings. You had gone and done the impossible.

You’d given people like him hope. You’d changed lives, and you’d done it without ever asking for praise or apology or permission. You had stood there, face lit by flashbulbs, and told the world that werewolves mattered.

That he mattered.

Remus laughed softly, shaking his head. He wasn’t sure whether to feel stunned or guilty. He hadn’t written in over a year. Hadn’t asked how you were. Hadn’t known the thing you were building in the dark would end up this… bright.

And still - he felt seen.

Even from across the silence.

He reread your quote at the bottom of the page, just above your signature:

“I don’t think we should be afraid to try  . Not when people are still suffering. Not when we can do better.”

You hadn’t named him. But Remus felt your words like they were spoken straight to him. Because he knew better, he knew you were speaking right to him.

Back inside, Sirius gave him a long look. “You alright, mate?”

Remus nodded slowly. “Yeah. Yeah, I think I am.”

He folded the paper carefully, tucking it beneath his arm. For a long time, he’d lived with the quiet grief of being forgotten. A side effect of his condition. Of fading away into the margins of other people’s stories.

But here you were, reshaping the narrative entirely.

You hadn’t just remembered him. You had remembered all of them - the ones who lived in the shadows, who never thought they’d be more than cautionary tales or footnotes in Ministry reports.

And maybe… just maybe… you’d done it for him. He stared down at your picture again, his smile quiet and unshakable.

“Godric’s beard,” James muttered behind him, reading the headline over his shoulder. “She really made a Wolfsbane Potion.”

Sirius let out a low whistle. “That’s going to change everything.”

Remus didn’t speak, but in his chest, something shifted. A pressure he’d carried for years lightened. And somewhere deep down, he knew this wasn’t the end of the story. You were out there. Living, thriving, blazing a trail.

And for the first time in a long time, he found himself wanting to reach out, outside of obligation and nostalgia. Because something real had reignited between you.

It didn’t take long for Remus to find you.

The moment he saw your name on the front page of the Prophet, he knew it wouldn’t be enough just to read the article ten times, to keep the paper folded on his night stand like some relic. He needed to see you.

For the ache in his chest that hadn’t gone away since fifth year. The one he thought he could outgrow, bury beneath the pages of law books and Ministry memos. But there it was, alive and sharp and hopeful again.

So he asked around.

He was discreet, as always. But not shy.

You were easy to trace once he learned about your position at St. Mungo’s. The Potioneering Department kept strict visiting hours, but Remus had never been one to blindly follow signs that read Authorized Personnel Only. He lingered until your shift ended, until he saw you push through the ward doors with your satchel slung across your shoulder, hair messily pinned back, a smudge of something silvery at your temple.

It felt like the wind had been knocked out of him.

You stopped when you saw him.

The quiet stretched as you stared in disbelief. He took one step closer.

"Hi," he said.

Your breath hitched. "Remus."

He offered a careful smile, the kind that trembled at the edges. "I hope it’s alright. I didn’t want to owl. I thought maybe... maybe you wouldn’t answer."

You swallowed. You looked older, of course. Grown into yourself. But your eyes were still the same. He could see the traces of that little girl still as he watched your grown self scan him, he bet he must look different as well.

"I might not have," you admitted softly. "I’m glad you didn’t give me the choice."

That made him laugh. Not a loud one, but real. He looked down. "You really did it. You actually - "

"Yes."

"I don’t even know what to say."

You smiled faintly. "Then don’t. Let me."

He blinked as you stepped closer.

"I invented it for you," you said, voice barely above a whisper. "So you’d stop suffering the way you used to. That’s all it ever was. All I ever wanted."

Remus looked at you like you’d peeled the years back with a single sentence.

He didn’t hug you, despite desperately wanting to. He didn’t wanna offend you or cross boundaries.

He just said, very quietly, "Thank you."

And that was enough.

He started taking the Wolfsbane Potion a week later, full seven days leading up to the full moon.

You brewed it yourself, of course. There were still regulatory delays, red tape the Ministry insisted on. But you had your licence. You had your clearance. More importantly, you had him.

You gave it to him with a note attached: Sip slowly, or it’ll make your throat burn. Seven days, don’t miss it.

Remus made sure to drank every single day of the week leading up to the full moon. It was still painful. The bones still bent. The skin still pulled and tore and reshaped.

But he remained. He was still there.

He could remember the walls. The sounds. The feel of the floor. He didn’t thrash, didn’t bite himself raw, didn’t wake up choking on blood and dirt.

And when morning came, he cried.

You were there.

Sitting in the armchair beside the bed in his tiny flat, watching him with quiet concern and a cup of now-cold tea in your hand.

"You stayed," he rasped.

"Of course, I stayed."

He swallowed, throat dry. "You didn’t have to."

You raised an eyebrow. "Remus Lupin, I have stayed with you in worse states than this. Don’t be daft."

He huffed a weak laugh. Then he looked at you. His tired brown eyes meeting yours. You hadn’t slept. Your eyes were shadowed, your robe wrinkled. But you looked proud, and somewhat tender. And maybe a little scared.

"I always missed you," he said.

You stilled.

He continued, voice low. "Even when I didn’t say it. Even when we stopped writing. I never stopped thinking about you."

You opened your mouth, then closed it.

He sat up slowly, wincing. "I loved you, you know. Even back then."

"Remus - "

"I didn’t say anything because I was scared. Because I thought... if I ever hurt you, if I ever lost control, and it was you in the way - "

"I’ve known since we were eight."

He blinked.

You smiled sadly. "Of course I knew. I knew you loved me. I knew you were afraid. But if anyone was ever going to understand, Remus, it was always going to be me."

He looked down. His hands shook. "I just didn’t want to be the monster in your story."

You moved to sit beside him on the bed.

"You’ll never have to worry again," you whispered. "Because I found a way."

He looked at you, eyes glassy. "Thank you."

"You don’t have to thank me."

"I do. I don’t deserve it."

You snorted. "Remus Lupin, you deserve the bloody stars and the moon and the sun. But I can’t give you that. So instead... I give you the potion."

He stared at you, long and quiet. Then he reached out, cupped your face in one trembling hand, and kissed you.

It wasn’t perfect. It was cracked with tiredness and ache and too many lost years.

But it was real, so real that it undid all the distance that grew between you two all these years. You thought you had lost him 7 years ago, but he was still yours.

When he pulled back, he rested his forehead against yours. "Thank you for giving me something I can never pay back."

You hummed. "Buying me a drink would do."

He laughed against your skin. "I’ll buy you all the drinks in the world."

end. masterlist

[beastyeastfreak]

Please Write Beast Headcanons about there reaction to reader getting hit on/flirted with by another cookie!!!! I will pay your child support to the anon you had a kid with!!!

THATS NOT MY KID IM NOT THE FATHER/MOTHER

Cw and tags: possessiveness, implied murder, romantic, GN! Reader, reader is referred to as pretty/beautiful/etc i use these words in a gender neutral way or am trying to, the beasts love to spoil you, mention of cheating, reader does not gaf about the beasts behaviour/encourages it

Written pre silent salt update

Mystic flour

🌾 - You dont leave the ivory pagoda much, if you do she does not linger far. You’re given a reputation pretty quick, your title will proceed you soon. “Her second set of ears” or “one who cannot be spoken too”. You lose a few friends, you get the memo likely before anything romantic happens she doesn’t want anything happening to you or anyone speaking to you. You were her wish, her one desire, her exception. She would be apathetic but not for you, you were her blessing. Someone she had unknowingly yearned for for thousands of years. You were someone she wouldn’t tolerate leaving, witches know what would happen if someone took you from her.

🌾 - Some cookies don’t think very well, Mystic flour know that well, one day the two of you head to a kingdom together to pick some items up. It got boring in the pagoda with little to do, she understood that and often brought you out to find things that would interest you and keep you with her, not that you needed material possession to spend time with her. It was a quiet day there which was the only reason she would let you go, she hated crowds. Your attention had diverted to a different stand, the stand owner watched you as you looked at their wares.

🌾 - “Whats a pretty cookie like you doing in this part of town?” You tense up, not at the flirt but because you knew what she’d do if she heard. “Um.. you really shouldn’t be talking to me like that,” you warned, your stance stiffened and you leaned away from the items. But they persisted in spite of the warning, “what? Scared of me? I don’t bite, unless you..” they’re cut off as the beast joins you. As she enters, all the perishable items on the desk seem to wilt and die. Her presence is strong, it shifts the air. You fluster as she enters the conversation. Making who you belong to crystal clear with her hand placement. One hand on your hip the other on your shoulder, also showing off her sharp nails unintentionally, as she speaks in an almost eerie way.

🌾 - “I found what we are looking for,” she opens her eyes and side glances at the stand owner now in shock. “It was not here,” she says quietly anf you swear you see her sharp fangs poking out. She then turns back, taking your arm and walking away. This is tame for her, this experience is the tamest of the others you endure beforehand. Many cookies have been turned to flour on a dime for speaking to you wrong, you were the one who convinced her to show mercy.

🌾 - When you return she will say nothing of the experience but if you praise her for ‘saving’ you she wont deny you. She’ll definitely keep you closer next time you both go out in public.

Burning Spice

🏜️ - Ive said this in previous headcannons, Burning spice sees any threat towards you as disrespectful towards him. You are apart of his temple, you were the gods lover, you were his. Anyone who so much as looks at you wrong, doesn’t greet you with the same reverence as him is ensured they understand or crumbled. Hell, he’d probably fight another beast or powerful being for you. Feel honoured, try to ignore the potential jamshed, make yourself a walking warning if you’re concerned with someones life.

🏜️ - Burning Spice is confident in his abilities and your loyalty to him. He allows you to go pretty far on your own or accompanied by one of his trusted spice soldiers. If you ever run away, trust that you will be hunted down, thats the second reason he’s so lax with you.

🏜️ - Warnings are as easily regarded as they are taken, you experienced this first hand one time. He decides to spoil you, he takes you on some lavish trip in a far away land. Adorning you in smooth fabrics, eating the sweetest fruits and jellys, napping on the beach in the sun. You head back towards the nearby building with the food at some point while he sunbathes. He’s too sleepy to tell you to ask a servant to fetch it for you.

🏜️ - You head in, another guest seems to be ensnared by you, or rather all the expensive metals, jewels and robes you were bestowed with. You probably looked like royalty, or (ironically enough) someone fresh out of Golden Cheese’s vault. So while you were picking out what you wanted and what you think he’d like at a somewhat leisurely pace the stranger approached. “Ah, what amazing handiwork on your garments, befitting of a beauty such as yourself,” that stranger purrs. You squint then look away, “um, thanks.” You try to seem as extremely disinterested as you were, maybe try to make some part of your attire bearing his symbol more visible.

🏜️ - Your attempts were in vain, even saying “Im from the Spice Kingdom, i live in The Great Destroyers temple in fact,” did not make them go away. They just thought you more interesting, you even warned them. “My husband is with me, he wont like you acting like this.” You say on the way back, to your dismay they follow. “Oh please, dont we all need to have a little away time? Besides you don’t need him, i am the…” followed by a long list of stupid titles you doubted actually impressed anyone. You then get back, where Burning spice was stretching, he locks eyes with you from afar, then the cookie trying to woo you and his face contorts to anger. Then the cookie looks a little nervous.

🏜️ - “Who is that..?” The cookie murmurs, nearly stammering. “My husband, The Great Destroyer?” You roll your eyes, “well go on, you said you could take him so go fight for my love.“ You say, Burning Spice is already walking over, weaponless yet still menacing, you look back at the cookie and they’re running. You catch Burning Spice, stopping him. “Don’t get jam and crumbs on your nice clothes.” You say and let him loose. He comes back later, laughing and all washed off. Whatever happened after that is chalked up to “some cookies just cant keep their eyes off whats mine!” He’ll say while pulling you impossibly close chugging the umpteenth glass of juice.

Eternal Sugar

🌷 - She was your happiness and you were hers, never would you part with her and always would she be beside you… even if you didn’t realise it. You were made off limits the second her eyes had caught a glimpse of you. When you became hers, she flaunts you, spoils you, adores you and you do the same. Your time is no longer spent working or stressing, you’re mostly at her side or in her lap. You could say you haven’t left her side for weeks and that’d be an understatement. No one in the garden would ever question nor attempt to get in between you too, lest they face the possibility of being entrapped in a jar or a statue.

🌷 - The only catch is you’ll never leave, any time you ask to go with her somewhere or you hear about something interesting going on. She’ll gently guide you elsewhere, “oh, but sweetness, the population there is so unpredictable. You’re like a thin string of sugar floss~, how about we do this instead?” She’d say if you tried to go, she’s good at it too because how can you say no to those eyes?

🌷 - Well, one time you were adamant about leaving, except you wanted her to come with you. There was some festival and you had been raving about it all week. It made you happy, and you wanted her to be happy with you, so she silently left, both of you in disguise, but told no one. It was as great as what you were told and even better with her! Your excitement was infectious and distracted her from wanting to go back to the garden.

🌷 - You separate only for a moment and unfortunately it all goes off the rails. You’re standing waiting for Eternal Sugar to return with drinks listening to the nearby festivities when a cookie comes up to you. “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?” This cookie grins says referring to the small wings tucked against your back. Appalled, you cringe. “Um…” you barely speak before arms slither around your waist and you’re pulled close. “There you are, my beloved,” Eternal Sugar says. You doubt her eyes ever left you. She was keeping you close in a way you knew you wouldn’t be staying at the festival much longer.

🌷 - “I got our food and.. oh! Who’s your friend?” She says in a way that drips jealousy, leaning her head against yours. One of her massive wings coming behind you, the other cookie is now looking around, giving an excuse about their friends and leaving. She watches them go then kisses your cheek. “I told you this would happen, what if it was someone worse who wanted to take you?~” she’ll tilt your head towards her, “can we go back to the garden? I’m feeling tired..” she’ll lie.

🌷 - You’ll notice that she’ll somehow be more affectionate with you for the time afterwards, don’t expect to leave for a very long time after that encounter.

Shadow Milk

🃏 - You were many things thanks to Shadow Milk, above every title he’s given you and every role he’s put you in, you were his lover. His lover. Though he would never show it, he kept you more protected than you know. You don’t see it but at all times there are puppet strings wound around you, if you’re about to step in a place you shouldn’t be those strings tighten and you walk away, except it feels more like “oh i don’t want to do this actually” and not “why did i just do that?” You don’t question it too thoroughly, you just encounter less issues now and thank the witches.

🃏 - You think you spend a healthy of time away from him, you don’t. In actuality you actually spent most of your time with him indirectly. He gives you many gifts, each one extends his omnipresence, so when you’re wearing something from him he is absolutely listening most of the time. If you ask him he’d tell you “Knowledge is a curse, wouldn’t you rather enjoy a white lie?” A little intimidated, you agree.

🃏 - His eaves dropping came in handy one time. He’d be lounging around mid air reading a book (and rewriting it) while listening to you in the background, a mug floating beside him. You were doing your own thing somewhere in the kingdoms, going through your daily rituals. What really made his ears open was when he heard someone he hadn’t recognised begin to speak to you all friendly. His eyes didn’t avert from the paper but if his ears could prick thats exactly what they’d be doing. “So, you doing anything this weekend? You’re cute,” He spit out his coffee, who did this guy think he was talking to you like that!

🃏 - He perked up, snapped his fingers so he wasn’t wearing his comfortable bed clothes and now in his usual jester attire. He jumped through a portal wasting no time. He watched from afar for a moment, you were clearly disinterested. “Im actually waiting for my partner,” you said. It always made his heart beat when you lied, especially about him! He might as well help you out! (And scare off whoever this was)

🃏 - He floated in, “Oh, my star~!” He sung out coming from around the corner, you whip around clearly happy to see him. He practically throws himself on you, and smothers you in exaggerated kisses, arms wrapped around your neck and one leg up behind him in a cartoonish way before harshly placing his lips against yours in a way that screamed territorial. Your face heats up from embarrassment, he then turns to the other cookie who didn’t seem to believe you but now, unfortunately, did. “Oh sorry, do you mind? I need a minute with my dearest, loveliest most adored actor” he says while holding your chin feigning innocence in his voice. But while you were hiding your face his shifted, he loved dropping the mask, putting on a face as scary as he was. The other got the memo, nervously escaping his wrath.

🃏 - You wont ever determine why he was truly near you, he’ll say that he wanted to see you but you know its a lie. Surprisingly, that cookie lives but at the expense of their reputation. Black sapphire is allowed to go ham with rumours about them, they end up moving towns. You, of course, have to endure lots of teasing from him. “If i knew you were so attractive to other cookies, i would have made you the main character!” He says while poking you.

[munsonify]

all the small things

pairing. bob reynolds x gn!reader

summary. three times bob goes out of his way to show you kindness, and the one time you find out why

content warnings. loads of sweet sweet fluff and mutual pining (no one’s surprised), non established relationships, r being referred to as pretty, spiders & r being afraid of them, yelena and ava being nosy shits and an instigators (affectionate) (lovingly), eventual confession of feelings, not proofread

word count. 4167

a/n. here have another 3+1 with bob cause i love him and i have so many thoughts for him. also im not too good at characterizing ava so when shes mentioned it might be ooc im sorry

———

shared couch

it was hard trying to acclimate to living and working in the rebuilt tower. you liked the responsibility, you liked being in your feet and having something useful to do. while you may’ve unwillingly been recruited to be on the new avengers team, you were glad to be of use somehow. still, even with this sort of twisted contentment, it was… odd being in this tower full of people you’d only known for two short months.

you found a little difficulty in communicating with the team, something that was expectant. you’d barely known each other when the title of the new avengers was thrust upon you. everyone was grappling with their own issues as they tried to make sense of what was happening. some people opened up better than others.

someone you grew fond of quickly was bob. while he wasn’t the most open of the group, you found that he was pleasant to talk to. on the few occasions you were able to get more than simple small talk out of him, he was quite charming. even when stumbling through a punch line of a joke, it always landed right, making you let out small, genuine laughs. though the conversations may never be deep, you were grateful someone here was willing to talk with you, especially someone who was so easy to talk to.

the large, open living room inside of the tower was bustling with people. all six of your teammates were there, something that didn’t quite happen often. you realized quickly that alexei was droning on about a new promo idea he had for the team no one seemed to care much about. you didn’t care too much, either, frankly sick of the all the photoshoots and the public appearances. still, you wanted in on the conversation.

you searched the furniture for a place to sit, eyes falling on two different spots. one would have you smushed between walker and bucky, an unfortunate duo to be sitting by. the other was next to bob, who sat alone in silence, head lolling onto the cushion of the loveseat. his eyes were looking everywhere but alexei as if trying to keep his mind occupied. that’s how his eyes found you, who was shyly standing a little away from the furniture.

bob watched as your eyes flickered between the two empty spots, quickly catching on to your dilemma. you wanted so desperately to sit next to him, though unsure whether you should. a small wave of his hand caught your attention, eyes falling onto him like his had down to you. the hand he waved with dropped down to the cushion beside him, patting it gently, urging you to come sit. you were more than happy to oblige.

your pace was a little slow as you walk towards him, gently sliding onto the small couch next to him. hesitantly, bob nudged your arm, brief and nervous. you wondered only for a second if it was in case the other side of him made an appearance. he leaned in slightly after his nudge, whispering into your ear with a tilted head.

“thought it would be better than trying to squeeze next to them,” bob said, a finger pointing discreetly over at bucky and walker. “walkers riled up today anyways.”

it was your turn to lean in a little, a small smile playing on your face as you whisper back to him, watching alexei wave his hands around as he spoke. it was your turn to discreetly point, this time at the man on his feet. “i wonder why.”

bob let out a short huff of air out of his nose as a way of laughing, eyes flickering over at you as you finally settled down next to him, resting your head back on the cushion the same way he was. your whispered conversation continued on below everyone else’s much louder conversation. while the theatrics were entertaining, you’d much rather speak with bob. he was kind.

———

coffee runs

it’d been a long few days for the team. between a two day mission that required more of your time than it should’ve, nearly excessive training that had your legs feeling like jelly, and meetings valentina practically forced you guys into, it was hard to find time for yourself. needless to say, you were quite drained.

with a cheek pressed against your pillow and your phone loosely in hand, you lay rested against your very welcoming bed. this was the first time you’d been inside your room in nearly four days. the first thing you attended to was a much needed shower, sweat gripping your body from the two hour training session from earlier in the morning. while you should be getting yourself ready for a press conference, you decided that spending some time on your phone just a little long was more important. you were better in a rush, anyhow. the hardest part of getting ready was done, you were clean. two and a half hours was plenty enough time to rest for a while longer.

you were rather enjoying that peace when you were interrupted by a knock on your door, soft and steady. a groan escaped your chest before you could think twice, turning your phone off as you let it drop face down on your bed. you pushed your aching body off of your bed, wobbling a little on your feet, before you forced yourself upright and to the door. relief washed over your body when you opened the door to reveal bob, shoulders straight and unusually confident, something you didn’t dwell on for too long.

in his hands were two large, warm coffees with small black writing on it. he was quick to smile at you as his fingers indent the cups slightly, something that happened almost on instinct when his eyes found you.

“hey,” bob greeted, voice a little weak. he let out a cough to clear his throat, as if that would help him amplify his voice. it only worked a little, though. “i, uh- i got you a coffee.”

you watched as he held out one of the coffees to you, gratefully reaching out for it with both hands. your fingers gently grazed his as he passed it along to you, an accidental touch that had his throat closing up just slightly. bob had more to say that was surely going to come out as a long, drawn out ramble, though it got caught in his throat. he took that as a momentary win, glad that he wasn’t completely making a fool out of himself like he usually does around you.

you always made him so nervous. you were kind and funny and so pretty to look at. it was easy to fall for a person like you, so it was no wonder that he did. he just wished he wasn’t such a pathetic wreck around you sometimes.

“thank you, oh my god,” you let out, warmth radiating onto your hands as you held the cup. you brought your lips up to it in an instant, tasting the deliciousness of the slightly bitter liquid. another groan left your mouth, this time soft and appreciative. you licked the coffee off your top lip that remained, realization hitting you right as you do so. “you know my order?”

“yeah,” bob squeaked out, rushing to answer you. a sudden burst of embarrassment surged through him. he realized how bad this might look, how it may come across creepy or something that he knows your order by heart. he wasnt meaning to come across that way, he simply just remembered. “you told me about this really good latte you had last week, thought that you might like another, ya know?”

that’s when the floodgates opened up, his rambling beginning with no sign of stopping. “it’s been a busy week, we’ve got that stupid press conference later, and you looked so tired after training that i thought you could use one. not that you looked bad or anything! god, i’m sorry, i didn’t mean it like that. i just figured since i was already out for a coffee for myself that you’d maybe want one too.”

bob let out a low, nervous chuckle when he finished speaking, shoulders slouching back down to its usual position. a little bit of his coffee had spilled over his whitened knuckles amidst his talking, his hand shaking ever so slightly, his grip a little too tight on the flimsy cup. his eyes fell down to the ground as he began shrinking into himself.

“that’s so thoughtful of you,” you told him once he let himself breathe after speaking. his eyes flickered up to your face searching for an insincerity he didn’t find any trace of from you. he never did, now that he thought about it. the only time you were even a little insincere was when you were speaking to walker, who tended to get on everyone’s nerves sometimes.

you had the prettiest smile on your face, one that eased his nerves down to where they usually were when he was around you. he was flustered, but not on edge. you weren’t weirded out by him. in fact, you seemed flattered that he remembered your order, and even more so that he’d thought to get you one.

“thank you, bob, really,” you told him, giving him a genuine nod.

“of course,” he responded, a small, nervous smile finding its way back onto his face. “anytime, really!”

“would you wanna come in?” you offered, opening up your door for him as a welcome. “we’ve got some time before we need to be at the press conference, i can finally tell you about how alexei gave yelena the birds and the bees talk on our way to the mission.”

“you’re joking?” bob asked, eyes going wide in shock and amusement. he looked just as bewildered as you did whilst it was happening, letting himself inside of your room. you couldn’t help but laugh at his reaction, face scrunching up as you recall the awfully uncomfortable situation, closing the door shut behind the man.

you tried not to think too much about how bobs scent washed over you as he passed you briefly, and you tried even harder not to stare too hard at the gorgeous smile that rested on his face. he looked a lot more at ease now that he knew you weren’t off-put by his actions. you liked this look on him. still nervous and a little fidgety, but more comfortable. he didn’t look like he wanted to crawl into his skin anymore.

and, even when you two sat right next to each other on the edge of your bed, thighs just inches apart, bob still felt better than before. it was odd the way he felt around you. while still incredibly flustered by your presence, he always felt comfortable around you. he never felt judged by you, and if he did, you unknowingly brushed that aside for him. it was like second nature to you.

———

loose spider

the aversion you had towards spiders always seemed a little childish to you. it was something you thought you’d eventually grow out of, or an issue you’d be at least a little less affected by by now. you were a tough combat fighter, one that has seen some unimaginable things. a fighter that still, for some reason, was afraid of spiders.

you never told this to the team, it was useless information, something you were sure would never need to be addressed. quite frankly you’d forgotten about this little fear of yours until you came face to face with it in the most unfortunate events such as this one. like usual, the team was bumping into each other in the towers kitchen in desperate search of some breakfast. while you rarely ever seemed to eat the same meals, you always accompanied each other before a long day.

with the shuffling of your feet, you found your way to the fridge in search of some butter for your toast. instead, you were met with a jet black spider that sat right on the handle, stopping you in your tracks. your hand was merely inches away from it when you realized it was sat there, watching as it moves a couple inches towards your hand as you pulled it back. you let out a choked gasp as you stumbled back slightly, eyes blown wide as you stare.

all you wanted was some damn buttered toast, yet here you were.

“someone get it,” you blurted out quickly, eyes not moving from the spider as you frantically pointed at it. your words caught the attention from everyone in the room. it was rather silent this morning, only a few whispers here and there between each other. everyone seemed to stare at you for a few moments instead of helping.

“it’s just a spider,” walker deadpanned once he saw what you were pointing at as if it was obvious. “it’s not a big deal.”

“it is to me,” you whispered weakly, embarrassed by your fear. you wish you could just ignore it, get what you needed and go, but you couldn’t. the mere sight of the spider made you shiver. you heard feet shuffling behind you, and you half expected it to be john ready to make fun of you or something.

instead, it was bob, who moved past you without a word. he was careful with his steps moving forward, hands reaching out to gently scoop the spider off of the fridge. once it was secured in his big palms, he slowly turned around, letting you see that he has it without actually showing it to you.

“‘m gonna go let it outside,” he told you in the softest tone. he offered you up a small, un-judgmental smile, before he started to move past you again, heading towards the elevator. this time, you didn’t flinch when the spider came near you. bob was kind, and despite whatever your brain was trying to tell you, you knew he wouldn’t tease you with it, or bring it near you to scare you even more.

“thank you,” you replied, looking at him with the most appreciative expression. he simply nodded as he continued on, the same smile playing on his lips still there, calming your anxiety.

god, he was so gentle. most people would’ve killed the spider, squashing it in their hands or with a shoe. but bob? bob was escorting down one of the largest buildings in new york to safely set it outside. he didn’t make a big fuss out of it, or make you feel bad for your fear. instead, he made you feel seen, safe. even if it was ‘just’ a spider. you were deep in thought about the man as you watched his figure disappear out of sight when yelena broke the silence.

“well that’s just adorable,” she quipped, a small smile playing on her face as she swirls the coffee in her hand. “i think a little someone has a crush on you.”

“the spider?” alexei asked cluelessly, earning an eye roll from ava who was perched up on one of the counters, and a quiet ‘dumbass’ from bucky who was nose deep in some book he hadn’t looked up from this entire conversation.

your face heated up at yelena’s comment, eyebrows furrowing together as you glance over at her. you finally move to open the fridge, grabbing ahold of the butter you were in search of.

“bob doesn’t have a crush on me,” you told her, shaking your head in disbelief. your voice was shaky, and you weren’t quite sure if it was because the adrenaline from the spider, or the possibility of bob having a thing for you.

it’s not that you didn’t like the idea, it’s just that you didn’t think it was true. sure, you had a blooming crush on him, and it would be amazing if he’d felt the same about you. there was just no way bob felt that way. he was simply being kind and attentive to you like he always was. this wasn’t new, and it definitely wasn’t motivated with anything romantic.

“just saying,” yelena mumbled, drawing her attention back to the meal in front of her. “i don’t think he would’ve been that nice about it to any of us.”

“can you imagine bob looking at walker like that?” ava piled on with giggles. her next words were laced with a fake affection, swooning in exaggeration as she looks at the blonde haired man. “don’t worry walker, i’ll take it outside for you!”

everyone laughed at ava’s nonsense, even bucky let out a huff of air out of his nose before she said one last thing. “he would’ve dragged him for it, y/n. clearly bobs just got a big ole soft spot for you.”

you spent the rest of breakfast in silence as you sat in your thoughts, picking at your toast and sipping at your juice when you realized you were being nearly too still. you tensed up a little when bob came back to the kitchen, frowning slightly when you realized his food must be a little cold now. your eyes lingered on him as he sat, something he noticed. he gave you another soft, closed lip smile, as if reassuring you in his own little way.

could he have a thing for you? could bob feel the same as you do? you tried to be optimistic about it, letting hope linger inside of you at the thought that maybe yelena and ava were right. you still doubted yourself. that’s just who bob was. kind, honest, caring. there’s no way he was only like that with you.

———

clean laundry

maybe you were being too confident in yourself. you brought a large load of laundry into the laundry room in the tower, slipping what you could inside the washer and dryer to get it done and over with. it was tough getting it to the room itself, but now that you had to bring it back up to your room you wished you would’ve just done two smaller loads.

you had your fabric softener barely gripped with a few of your fingers as you braced the hamper, waddling your way towards the elevator, leaning your whole body towards the buttons to indicate you’re wanting to go up. you tried to keep ahold of everything, knee pushing upwards to keep the hamper in place.

getting inside the elevator was worse. you nearly knocked over your clothes when you sat it down, hands fumbling to press the number for the living quarters. why they didn’t put a laundry room on your floor was beyond you. valentina was, as usual, no help when you pressed her about it. she simply shrugged it off and moved along. as if she couldn’t be more frustrating of a human being.

the hamper wasn’t super heavy, only heavy enough for you to struggle a little lugging it around with you across the large tower. you huffed and puffed your way out of the elevator when you finally make it there, irritation growing rapidly as you try not to drop any clean clothes on the floor. you didn’t want a trail of potential undergarments leading towards you room.

you weren’t even a quarter of your way to your room when bob coincidentally turned the corner, finding you struggling slightly with your clothes. you gave him a tight lipped smile, one that was clearly full of annoyance. he was quick to swoop in to help. of course he was.

“can i help?” bob offered, walking up to you with his arms out slightly. you shook your head no, though your eyes told a different story. all he had to do was cock an eyebrow at you for you to give in, sheepishly setting the hamper down on the ground.

“thanks,” you whispered out, watching as he effortlessly picked up the hamper and began to walk. you followed behind him with a slight stumble at the start, fabric softer in hand. while you were strong as you were, sometimes you wished you had superhuman strength like some of your teammates did. it would certainly help you with your mundane tasks.

as you followed bob to your room, you began to think about what yelena had told you about bob having a crush on you. he was always eager to help you out. you always thought it was nothing, just a way to be friendly, something he would do for everyone. the thought was eating you up inside. you wanted desperately for him to feel that way about you. you wanted him to want you.

you were surprised at what came out of your own mouth next as he opens up your door for you, letting you walk in first, quietly following behind you.

“ya know,” you started, pointing beside your bed to let bob know to set your hamper there. he did just that, watching as you start to pick at the laundry to sort through it. “yelena told me you might have a crush on me.”

bob froze in an instant. he watched as you seemingly nonchalantly started to fold your clothes, setting them down on your bed right afterwards. your hearts seemed to pound together quickly, sharing the same rapid pulses at your words.

“she did?” bob choked out, eyes blown wide. he seemed just as shocked at the proclamation as you did.

“yeah,” you affirmed, glancing over at him. he was visibly nervous, hands fumbling with each other, fingers moving together in attempts to calm himself. you started to panic more at the sight of him, trying your best to distract yourself with your laundry. did you make him uncomfortable?

you realized that you might’ve messed up big time. you didn’t reveal your feelings for him directly, though it felt like by telling him that, you were opening yourself up to questions. ones that would lead him straight to your feelings. it felt like you were already out in the open for him to see right through.

“would it be so bad?” bob whispered, eyes piercing into your skin, trying his best to get his read on you. even if you felt like he knew how you felt, he hadn’t a single idea. “if i, uh… did had a crush on you?”

that made you stop in your tracks, hands gripping the half folded shirt in your hands. your eyes trailed to him one last time, looking right into his. bobs eyes were big and round and blue as you stare at each other, tension thick in the air as he waits for your answer.

“not at all,” you whispered back. you finished folding the shirt without looking at it, setting it blindly on the bed. relief visibly washed over bobs body, tension releasing from his jaw and his shoulders. his hands still fidgeted together, though, as he tried to collect his thoughts.

“i was really hoping it wasn’t obvious,” bob told you, chuckling quietly at himself. “i guess i was.”

“i didn’t notice until she mentioned it,” you replied, deciding to lean into the newfound information. “not until you were a gentleman and saved me from that spider.”

you two had matching cheesy grins on your faces at your words, the slight absurdity of it bringing out a giddiness that made your chest bloom with warmth. all he could do was shake his head at you at first, a hand of his reaching up to scratch the back of his neck nervously. “just know i didn’t show it any mercy for scaring you like that. i put it right on the sidewalk instead of the grass.”

it’s your turn to laugh this time. “the poor bastard got what it deserved.”

as your guys’ laughter died down, you went back to silently folding your clothes. the air was a lot less tense now that everything was - for the most part - out in the open. you thought the conversation over as bob started slowly pacing across your room, finding the swivel chair at your desk to sit at. he leaned back as casually as he could manage, hands smoothing down the front of his shirt. you realized that you might not have been clear on how you felt, doing so in the best way you could think of. teasing and kind.

“you know this means you have to take me on a date now, right?” you asked him, eyebrows lifting up with expectation. bob nodded quickly and enthusiastically, eyes bright as he looks up at you from his seat across the room.

“of course, y-yeah!” bob tells you immediately, a small spout of rambles beginning like they always do when he’s nervous. “i would be honored to, i mean, i’ve been thinking about it for months. i’d be kinda crazy not to now that i know i’m not completely off base with you.”

and honestly, you couldn’t wait.

[callme-holly]

𝐮𝐧𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 - 𝐃.𝐂

||۶ৎ darry curtis x johnny's older sister!reader

⊹₊⋆.˚୨୧⋆.˚₊ ⊹

The sun casts a gentle glow across the sidewalk as you approach the gate of the house, the rays glinting off the metal like light to a magnifying glass, blinding if you look from the wrong direction. The latch is broken, the hinges rusted and crying as you push it open, but everything seems so… lived in. 

You’ve never really been here, never really seen the people Johnny speaks so highly of. Of course, you’ve heard of the Curtis boys and perhaps seen them in passing, but never stopped to talk. Never to thank them personally for all the things they do for your brother when you can’t. 

You’ve been raising Johnny ever since your parents checked out, working double shifts to try and pay for your own dilapidated apartment where the paint is grey and pallid. He stays with you occasionally—long enough for your parents to not grow suspicious—and then spends the rest of his nights here. Or in the lot, but that part he never tells you. 

The doorknob, probably once a delicate gold, is now worn down from being turned too many times, and the wood is splintered at the bottom right corner, seemingly from where a boot has made contact too many times. It’s charming in its own rugged way, homely, yet broken enough to make you hesitate when knocking.

If these boys were anything like Dallas Winston—the rough hood Johnny claims to be his closest friend—then you would not be all too welcome. In fact, they probably don’t even know who you are, and while Johnny may have mentioned you, it’s not like you’d made the effort to reach out. 

Your knock resounds before you can stop yourself, knuckles rapping against the wood in a soft, repetitive motion that cuts through the silence like a knife. The tension simmers, that uncomfortable waiting game in full force that has you shifting nervously on the spot, the planks of the deck creaking beneath the soles of your shoes. 

There’s a call from inside, muffled and indistinct, then footsteps, heavy yet certain in a way that has your muscles tensing out of pure instinct. Your mind starts to race at such a speed you struggle to keep up; maybe you should just turn away now. Johnny can grab his jacket the next time he’s over… But he needs it now and you really can’t afford to get him a spare… 

Before you can even begin to entertain the idea of turning on your heel, the door opens, and for a moment your breath seems to catch, oxygen escaping you entirely and leaving you winded. 

“Can I help you?” His voice is rough from use, a deep rumble in the back of his throat that makes your stomach flutter and your heart skip a beat. For a moment, you feel akin to a giddy   girl with a crush on her teacher—childish, naive… 

“I—I think my brother left something behind.” Your voice comes out in an almost squeak, weak and pathetic, making you cringe internally and wish for the world to open up and swallow you whole. 

The stranger raises a brow, tilting his head slightly, and you can’t help but notice the wya his bicway flex where he holds the door. It’s enough to make the butterflies flap their wings harder, their little bodies stirring up a storm inside of you, making you feel entirely elated that your brother has such good taste in friends.

“Brother?” He pauses for a few moments, the cogs turning slowly, before his eyes brighten in recognition. “Wait, you’re Johnny’s sister?” 

You nod, maybe a little too quickly, and his bewildered expression quickly melts into  a genuine smile, one that eases your tight muscles and makes any idea that you were unwelcome seems utterly ridiculous. 

“I thought I recognised you. Y’all look alike, really.” He muses, before stepping aside, still holding the door. “You want to come in?” 

Your feet seem to be working faster than your brain, and without any sort of rational thought, you step forward and into the house, immediately enveloped by the sheer warmth that seems to surround the place.

It smells faintly like cooking and smoke, and every piece of furniture looks like it holds at least a thousand memories. The TV in the corner is a little dated and beaten, but it’s more than you have at your place, so you can’t exactly judge. 

He heads towards the general direction of the kitchen, and you follow blindly, like a lost puppy with nowhere better to be. “D’you want a drink or something?” 

His words snap you out of your reverie and you nod again, only once, before deciding maybe words will make you look less weird. “Please. Just a water is fine.” 

You can’t help but watch as he works, drifting about the space with a grace that draws you in like a moth to a flame; his muscles ripple beneath the fabric of his shirt and, god, this is wrong. This is so wrong; this is your brother’s friend and here you are drooling over him like some type of starved animal.

The silence has stretched between you both for a few seconds now, filled only by the clinking of glasses and the running of the tap, and you decide to desist from being awkward much longer before he draws to the conclusion you're weird and kicks you out. 

“Um… You’re Ponyboy, right?” 

The man laughs, deep and rich, and while it’s sweet as honey, it has you growing nervous all over again. He turns slowly, handing you the glass, callused fingers brushing yours and sending sparks through every nerve ending. “That’s my little brother.” He corrects. “I’m Darry.” 

Darry…. 

“Oh.” He must sense your embarrassment, the feeling tacit, as he very quickly adds.

“It’s fine; Johnny must talk about him a lot. They’re close.” He smiles again. “It’s okay.” And the reassurance is enough to have you melting like putty, your bones turning to jelly under the mere sound of his voice. 

Your fingers tighten around the glass, knuckles turning white, a way to ground yourself and try to resist the urge to throw yourself at him. He’s addictive just to look at, and that only makes you more aware of his eyes on you. Not in a judgemental way—just a steady gaze that has you shifting, like he’s trying to read you without asking too much. 

You take a small sip from the water, more out of something to do than actual thirst, letting the liquid soothe the lump in your throat before braving speech once more. “He, uh— He really looks up to guys. Johnny, I mean.” Your stuttering does little to mask your flustered front, but Darry doesn’t seem to mind. 

“Yeah… He’s a really good kid. Shame y’all got dealt such a shitty, you know.” He sits down opposite you, leaning back in the chair like it’s completely natural. “How’s he settling in with you? He said he’d moved in.” 

And the fact that Johnny had even mentioned this much makes you feel a strange sense of warmth, a value that brings you close to tears. And most importantly, Darry had remembered. He knew the whereabouts of your brother.

“He’s doing well. Big change but he’s safer… Happier, I hope.” 

Darry nods, dropping his gaze to the table top, fingers tracing the grains of the wood idly. “It’s nice to know he’s got someone else who cares ‘bout him.” 

There’s something tender behind those words that has your heart beating a thousand times faster, and you stand suddenly, needing to escape the urge to grab him by the collar and just… No.

“I should probably grab his jacket.” the words come out in a garbled rush. “Don’t want to get in the way of anything!” 

Darry looks suddenly startled, eyes widening slightly, and you’d feel bad if it weren’t for the fact he had your stomach in knots. But he points casually to the living room regardless in a way that is almost natural; He doens’t seem in much of a rush to get rid of you.

Sure enough, Johnny’s jacket is folded over the back of the couch like it belongs there. Your fingers brush over the worn denim of the collar, and everything about it feels safe. Stable. Like home. 

“Y’know,” Darry starts, still watching you carefully. “He talks about you a lot, too.” 

“He does?” You don’t turn, not at first, too scared to make full eye contact out of fear of short-circuiting. 

He hums, standing and walking towards you. “Yeah. Says you work too hard and that he worries you don’t take time for yourself.” 

The lump that forms in your throat is different now—burning and unexpected. It’s a pain you didn’t realise was lingering, the epiphany that your little brother is concerned because you’re the last piece of family he’s got… 

“I’m trying,” you admit, keeping your gaze down. “Sometimes it doesn’t feel like enough.” 

There’s a beat, and then his fingers are tilting your chin up, touching feather-light but enough to make your cheeks warm. Your eyes meet his own; green and perfect, like the calmest parts of the ocean, the parts where you’d trust the currents to carry you anywhere. 

“You being here? You supporting him through everything? That’s enough. Trust me.” His voice is low now, soft and a little more genuine. “You dont gotta carry it all on your own.” 

Something about the way in which he says it cracks you open, and you nod again, not trying your voice, afraid it might shatter and give you away.

Darry glances to the door, then back at you. "If you want, you can stay a minute. Nobody's back for a while and the company's nice..."

You hesitate. Part of you knows you should go, that if you accept this offer, you're giving in to a trap you know is wrong to fall into. That being here, this close, is dangerous. But there's another part, deep in the depths of your heart, that is starving for comfort, warmth, and everything he's giving you…

So you shrug, biting your lip to hold back the full force of your smile.

"A minute wouldn't hurt."

He smiles back—real, warm—and gestures towards the couch.

"Alright, sweetheart. Take a load off."

And you do, talking about anything and everything, relieving yourself of weights you didn't even know existed. Suddenly, the Curtis house doesn't feel quite so unfamiliar anymore 

||۶ৎ darry masterlist

||۶ৎ tag list. @mrsdillonx , @goingdelux18 , @princesshailierawr , @r0seb100d , @groovydonutpost, @rizzraa , @sheepandlams , @marinefreaakk , @sugarrootwrites , @marilyn-girly , @itonlyhastobetruetoday , @dairyfairyy , @williamafton26 , @mystiqueonfleek007 , @atpeacee , @theoneandonly-vrg

[e1e4n0r5]

Their Little Plaything: Epilogue

Masterlist, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

Fandom: Arcane: League of Legends

Pairing: Bullies Cait & Vi x Loner Nerd Reader

Words: 3449

Synopsis: 6 years later, our happy threesome lives their best lives

Warnings: i will not be held responsible for what i write when i'm ovulating. Breeding kink, HexStraps that get you pergnart, strap-on, strap-on referred to as cock, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, wand vibrator, talk of safe words, spit play, drink-mouth-swap thing 🫣, breath play/air restriction, mention of collar blink and you'll miss it, talk of getting pregnant/pregnant body

Notes: "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened," FUCK YOU I'M CRYING 😭 I had no idea so many people would read this story, it's genuinely meant so much that you've loved it 😭 But we still have the bonus chapters. It's not goodbye for TLP Cait x Reader x Vi. We've all earned this ending, so enjoy!

6 Years Later

You arrived back home, bags from your shopping trip weighing down your arms. Cait had organised a day out with your mother as a surprise, giving you the family card with strict instructions to ‘buy everything you think we’ll like’. Still, you’d limited yourself to a few new dresses, a pair of shoes, and a little bracelet they can seal around your wrist.

You headed into the house and detoured to the study when you heard voices. Smiling when you heard your wives, you paused outside, not wanting to interrupt if it was important.

“We’re very happy with the design.” Jayce, a family friend, co-found of HexTech.

Viktor, the other co-founder, was also present. “This inner device will collect- Oh wait…Are you both comfortable with the inner devices?”

“What makes you think we wouldn’t be comfortable?” Vi challenged. You couldn’t see her but you could imagine her crossing her arms with a raised eyebrow.

“Well…Um…”

“We’re both perfectly comfortable with that, Viktor,” Cait reassured him. You knew she was giving a little pleased smirk.

“Yes…So, as I was saying: the inner devices will collect-”

“Don't care,” Vi interrupted. “Yes or no: will these let us put a baby in Y/N?”

“What the fuck?!”

You burst into the room, eyeing the four of them standing around the large desk in the centre of the ornate room. Jayce and Viktor blushed bright red, obviously very uncomfortable as you entered; Vi was smirking, almost proud that you had heard her; and Cait was calm and collected.  

Laid on the desk were two harnesses with inner shafts in the crotch emitting a faint blue glow. They had no toys attached to the front, but there was a closed metal briefcase next to them.

Cait just smiled at you. “Hello, darling. How was your shopping trip? Is your mother well?”

You glared at her, putting your bags down. “She sends her love, as always. And our shopping trip – which I see now was a distraction shopping trip, not a loving surprise you organised! – was nice, thank you. But now I'm wishing I'd been more punishing on your card.”

She just kept smiling. “Our card, darling. And do you want to go back out and be more punishing?” she dared, knowing you wouldn't. Despite her and her family's practically limitless funds, you still had trouble spending their money. Despite Cait and Vi constantly telling you it was your money too.

“I want to know what's going on,” you said sarcastically, looking between her, Vi, Jayce, and Viktor. “What are these things?” you asked, looking at the harnesses.

“Well, we don't have an official name yet-”

“I still say you should go with ‘HexStrap’,” Vi teased.

Viktor blushed. “But essentially they will convert female sexual fluids-”

“It's going to let us knock you up,” Vi explained, looking like the cat who got the cream.

Your mind was blown. “That's possible?”

Jayce nodded. “Female-female fertilisation is possible with certain technology-”

 “Yes, darling, it's possible,” Cait smiled at you.

“And the babies would be healthy?”

Cait and Vi smiled at each other at your maternal concern.

Viktor nodded. “All the research indicates any foetuses conceived can be carried to term and live perfectly healthy lives.”

Not wanting to give in too easily, you raised an eyebrow and crossed your arms brattily. “Well, what if I want to get you pregnant?” you challenged both of them.

They just looked back at you; Vi with a sceptical smirk, Cait with an amused tilt of her head.

“Alright, you don't have to be so loud,” you snapped back.

“Sweetheart,” Vi said softly, coaxingly, sweetly, “why don't you take your new things upstairs; we’ll be up in a bit, you can show us what you bought.”

“And then you show me your new things?” you asked sarcastically.

Vi just smiled at you. “Five.”

Your eyes widened, looking at Cait for backup. It didn't come.

“Ten,” she replied.

“No, I'm going!” you rushed back over to the bags you'd put down, picking them all up.

“Fifteen!” Vi called after you. In the distance, an anguished ‘no!’ could be heard running up the stairs.

“Do we go for twenty?” Cait asked Vi thoughtfully.

“Let's see how well these things work first,” she nodded her head to the straps.

“Should we ask?” Jayce whispered to Viktor.

He shook his head. “I think it's best not to.”

You paced around the bedroom as you waited for Vi and Cait to come upstairs with their new toys. They were seriously going to impregnate you with those things without asking you?!

You heard the front door close downstairs, then footsteps slowly started to make their way upstairs. You wanted to run out and meet them there, but they’d told you to wait in the bedroom. Plus, they had already counted to fifteen; you didn’t need your night to get any worse.

The door opened and they stepped inside. Vi carried a large metal briefcase, Cait the smaller one.

“What’s going on?!”

“Just a favour we asked of some friends,” Vi smirked, walking over to Cait’s desk and placing the briefcase on it.

“Some techno strap-ons that’ll get me pregnant?” you demanded, crossing your arms indignantly.

Cait raised an eyebrow. “We’ve discussed having children, Y/N, you said you wanted us to start a family. Unless you’ve changed your mind?”

“No, I haven’t, not at all! But I didn’t know that meant you’d asked Jayce and Viktor for HexTech straps!”

“HexStraps,” Vi corrected with a grin.

“When were you planning on telling me you’d done this?” you snapped.

“Sweetheart,” Cait soothed, walking over to you and cupping your cheeks. “Take a breath and let us explain.”

You sullenly took a deep breath, letting them speak.

“When we first discussed children last year, we asked Jayce and Viktor if there was anything they could do. If there was any way we could have children ourselves. They’ve been working on it since then. They told us last week that they needed to talk to us, so I arranged for you to be out of the house today, in case they gave us bad news.”

Vi stroked your back. “We didn’t tell you because we didn’t want to promise you something and then disappoint you if they couldn’t make something work. But it looks like they have,” she smiled, looking at the briefcases.

“Do you want to take a look?” Cait asked gently.

You were suddenly nervous, but nodded. Their hands in the small of your back, they led you over to the desk. They each opened a briefcase, letting you see inside. Looking more closely at the harnesses, you could see how beautiful and intricate they were. The harnesses had fine gold woven into the fabric of the straps; the inner phallic shafts a soft metal with HexTech glowing blue inside.

“Will they be comfortable for you both?” you asked in concern.

Cait smiled. “We tried on several models; they're very enjoyable to wear.”

You nodded, relieved that your wives’ efforts to give you a baby wouldn't be painful for them, even though you knew they would endure whatever was needed if it meant giving you something you wanted.

You looked into the other briefcase, intrigued. “Why are there different sizes? And surely we only need two?”

“Why limit ourselves to only two cocks to fuck you with?” Cait teased.

You blushed. “So...When can we try them out?”

“You ready for us to put a baby in you, sweetheart?” Vi asked, bending your legs back to your shoulders, making you groan as her cock filled you more deeply. “You want us to make you a mommy?”

“Fuck, yes,” you wept, grabbing at her hips, pulling her in closer.

Vi pinned you to the bed, her HexStrap pressing deep inside you. Your eyes rolled back as she brushed your cervix, your back arching. “You like my cock inside you, baby?”

You nodded desperately, cupping her cheek, kissing her deeply as she fucked you. You moved together, panting as writhed and pressed against each other.

You cried out as you orgasmed, your cunt clamping down almost painfully on Vi’s cock as she came inside you for the first time, your hips trying desperately to meet hers as you felt her cum spill inside you.

They both kissed your neck and cheeks as you came down, letting your catch your breath.

“Now, that was one, sweetheart,” Vi said as she pulled out of you, moving to the side so Cait could take her place.

“What number did we say earlier?” Cait taunted, moving your hands above your head and pinning them down with one hand.

Your eyes widened. “No…No, please! I-I can’t do that many!”

“You can, and you will, darling,” she threatened, rubbing the tip of her cock against your leaking hole. “Because we’re not stopping until you’re dripping with our cum and have a baby in your belly.” She pressed inside, sliding her strap into your already aching hole.

An hour later, you were sobbing into the sheets as Cait pressed you into the mattress, knees wide apart, chest to the bed, pussy literally dripping onto the bed.

“Ei…Eight,” you wept.

“Good girl,” she panted in your ear, sweat coating her brow, pulling her cock out of you, breathing deeply.

“How about we take a break?” you heard Vi ask. You moaned appreciatively, your face buried in the sheets. Vi laughed. “No, not you, sweetheart.” Hands rolled you over onto your back, holding your legs apart. You blinked your eyes at Vi, your vision slightly blurry.

She smirked at you, holding up a wand like a weapon.

“N…Noooo,” you moaned weakly, your bottom lip trembling.

She hovered over you, her nose a few inches from yours. “Colour, baby?”

You hiccupped sadly. “Green.”

With a dangerous smirk, she turned the wand on. Holding herself above you, keeping her eyes locked with yours, she slowly traced it down your stomach, threatening you with what was to come. You shook as the vibrations got closer to your pussy, gasping and shuddering when they finally started assaulting your clit.

You cried and whined as the powerful sensations rocked through you, your pussy already promising another orgasm. You held Vi’s shoulders with trembling hands as you rode the wand, your hips moving out of your control.

“Good girl,” she teased, licking into your mouth, swallowing your moans.

It sent you over the edge when she sucked your tongue, crying out into her mouth as your hips rocked and pulsed.

“How many, baby?” Cait asked, crouching next to the bed with a cold bottle of electrolyte drink, pressing it to your neck.

You whimpered. “Nine.”

“Do one more and then you can have a drink, darling,” she gently shook the bottle as if it were a prize to be won. But your body obeyed, not that the wand gave you much choice. Only two minutes later, your body shook with another climax, twitching under Vi.

When you moaned out, “Ten,” Vi moved off you, turning off the wand and setting it down.

“Come on, baby, let’s sit you up a little.” She supported you in her lap, holding you back against her chest.

“Are you ready for a drink, sweetheart?” Cait asked, opening the bottle.

You nodded, opening your mouth.

She smiled at you, taking a sip, squeezing your cheeks together, and trickling the drink into your mouth. You moaned as you swallowed, opening your mouth again. Cait chuckled and repeated the process; take a sip, squeeze your cheeks, pour the drink from her mouth to yours.

“Anymore?” she asked after she take a drink for herself.

You nodded, whining pitifully.

Vi smirked, standing you up and forcing you to your knees. Picking up the wand, she turned it on and handed it to you. Obediently, you held it to your clit, rocking on it as they both stood in front of you.

When you opened your mouth again, Vi held your jaw firmly and turned your head to her. “Greedy slut,” she growled, bending down and spitting onto your outstretched tongue.

You moaned loudly, your pussy throbbing. You kept your tongue out as Cait took another sip, leaning down and dribbling it into your mouth.

“Swallow, slut,” she instructed, handing the bottle to Vi.

The pink-haired butch took a drink of her own, then watched in amusement as Cait took her turn spitting onto your tongue. Vi held your eye as she made you wait, drinking from the bottle as you knelt in front of her, Cait’s spit waiting on your tongue, your eyes begging her for more drink. Not to wash away Cait’s spit – never – but to get the refreshing liquid directly from Vi’s mouth.

She finally took pity on you. “Are you almost at eleven?” You nodded, starting to moan as your cunt started to pulse again, empty without a cock in it. “Okay. Get to eleven, then you can have some more.”

“But don’t swallow before then,” Cait instructed, enjoying the sight of her spit still decorating your outstretched tongue.

You nodded obediently, embracing the orgasm that was building inside you. Keeping your tongue out the whole time, you moaned and whined as number eleven rolled through you, your breasts bouncing as you rocked on the wand.

When you started to settle down, Vi’s foot pressed the wand harder into your pussy. “Good girl,” she praised. “Let’s see how quickly we can get you to twelve.” She took the final drink from the bottle, squeezed your cheeks together, and slowly, agonisingly slowly, let the drink drip from her lips. Little by little she fed you the drink whilst your next orgasm built inside you. When she was finished, she put her hand over your mouth.

“Do not swallow, do you hear me? Finish this one, then you can swallow,” she instructed darkly, her eyes intense on yours.

You nodded, your eyes already starting to cross as your pussy started clenching again. You kept your eyes on hers, your foreheads pressed together, her hand over your mouth, as a powerful orgasm ripped through you. Vi cupped the back of your head, using both hands to hold you upright as you groaned and spasmed with your twelfth climax.

“Good girl,” she praised in your ear. “Now swallow, sweetheart. Swallow like a good girl.”

You swallowed the mixture of Cait’s spit and the drink, moaning as it went down your throat.

“You feeling okay, baby? Still green?” Vi asked, checking in on you, her hand still on your mouth.

You nodded as best you could, making a happy sound in your throat.

“One more here,” Cait commanded, putting her hair into a low bun, “Then we’re both going to fuck you one last time. Can you manage that, sweetheart?”

You nodded pathetically, your overstimulated clit starting to protest at the wand. Vi kept her hands on your mouth and head, watching you intensely as you started to climb again.

“You wanna do the thing, baby?” she asked.

You moaned behind her hand, nodding.

“Okay. Deep breath in,” she instructed. You obeyed, inhaling deeply through your nose. “And hold on.” She clamped her fingers over your nostrils, cutting off your air. You held your breath under her hand, the heady sensation increasing the pressure in your pussy.

“Well done,” Cait praised from behind you, her finger stroking over the thin leather around your neck.

When she’d counted to ten in her head, Vi moved her hand off your mouth. You inhaled deeply, gasping for breath. You whimpered as your pussy throbbed.

“Ready to go again?”

You took a few more breaths, nodding.

“Okay, breathe in…And hold.”

Pressing her hand over your mouth and nose again, Vi watched you carefully. Your body writhed on the wand, starting to shake as your orgasm grew inside you. They could both tell you were right on the edge, just about to fall over.

“Three, two, one,” Vi said quietly in your ear, then released your face, sending you into a strong orgasm when you were able to breathe again. You gasped and moaned, writhing violently on the wand, your brain suddenly hit with a rush of oxygen.

They held you as you shook, soothing your body to help calm down. Vi picked you up gently, laying you down on the covers.

“One more for us both, okay?” she soothed, pressing a kiss to each cheek.

You whined wretchedly, nodding.

Pushing your legs back to your chest, she guided her strap back inside you, making your back arch off the bed. You keened low, your body pliant as Vi fucked you with her cock.

“This is it, baby,” Vi urged in your ear, her hips moving frantically. “This is gonna do it.”

Cait stroked your hair softly. “Tonight’s the night you get a baby, darling. Oh, imagine if we both bred you tonight, if we both fucked a baby into you.”

You all moaned at the thought.

Vi grunted in your ear. “I can see it, two babies in your belly. You’ll be so round for us, sweetheart, you’ll look so good with our babies in you.”

You wept at the thought.

“But you have to come first,” Cait coaxed. “We can’t come if you don’t, and you can’t get a baby without our cum deep inside you.”

You whined in protest, at the idea of not getting your babies.

“So, finish for us, sweetheart,” Vi encouraged. “You can do it.”

That helped you over the edge, pussy clamping down on Vi’s cock. With a moan of her own, she spilled inside you, her hips pumping her cum into your waiting pussy.

“Fourteen, sweetheart. One more,” Cait smiled, taking Vi’s place. “Can you do it for us? For our future babies?” she asked, running her cock up and down your soaked slit. Not waiting for an answer, she slid inside you, both of you groaning. “One last time, baby, here we go,” she urged, thrusting her hips against yours. You laid under her, wanting to rock your body against her, to hold her close, but your body just wouldn’t move.

All you could do was moan against her thrusts, accepting everything she gave you. Vi reached a hand between you, rubbing your clit, and making you cry out as she did.

“Last one, sweetheart,” Vi spoke in your ear, kissing your cheek, pressing her forehead to yours.

It didn’t take long for you and Cait to cum one final time, Cait holding you close as she pumped her cum inside you.

They held you tightly, both of them cupping your stomach.

“We did it, baby. I know it.”

Three years later

You reclined back on the sofa, just waking up from your nap, one toddler under each arm, their precious heads on your chest. Mila, the eldest and your feisty little pink-haired girl, curled into your side. Eden, the calmer twin, fisted her blue-hair as she slept.

The door to the sitting room clicked open softly, your wives’ heads popping in. You smiled at them from your position, unable to move, lest you wake your babies.

They approached you quietly, crouching down in front of you.

“Hi, sweetheart,” Vi whispered.

“Do you feel more rested?” Cait asked, gently stroking your hair off your forehead.

You nodded sleepily. “A bit. These two are still bouncing around in there,” you nodded to your bumped stomach. “Hopefully they'll settle down before bed.”

Vi rubbed your bump. “They will,” she soothed, kissing you through your dress.

Mila shifted against you, propping herself up on her elbow. She blinkered her eyes open, which widened at seeing your wives. “Mama!” she cried, throwing herself at Vi.

Disturbed from her sleep, Eden groaned into your side, pulling herself closer.

Cait stroked her hair gently. “Eden,” she cooed, “It’s time to wake up.”

The small child pouted, reaching out for her. “Mother,” she begged to be picked up.

“Come here, darling,” she picked the child up, holding her close as she flopped in her arms.

“You both have to wake up,” Vi said, patting Mila’s back, “Auntie Powder’s coming over later for dinner.”

“Pow-Pow!” they both squealed excitedly, suddenly awake.

You laughed as Vi helped you up with her free arm, holding you close as you regained your centre of gravity. The five of you headed out into the garden, your hearts bursting with joy.

Sometimes you still woke up and expected to be that girl again, the one who kept your head down, who thought you didn’t belong, who flinched when people looked at you. But when you felt Vi’s hands on your bump, heard Cait murmuring to the twins through the baby monitor, and you remembered: you made it. Together.

Taglist: @sevikas-whore, @djstinkyfartz, @jinririz, @abbyandcaitlover, @ayuxiru, @bebeluvvv, @youdoyou-andiwilldome, @kittymrtnezz69, @wyprettylilone, @jlb20416, @autisticratbagtm, @theoreticalfreak, @riotstemple29, @zaunite-516, @zmbieeee, @godhatesgoodgirls, @yoyo-w, @milanyas, @unknownomgg, @bella-but-not-hadid444, @marvelwomenarehot0, @nenoino, @opalundercover, @spicedcherrylolli, @colettespace, @flowersareup

[angelsafa]

Hiiiiiiiiii😭😭😭 I'm here to share a void success story, it's preeetty recent and I'm still going crazy over it😭😭😭😭 (I'll probably share/spam this on other blogs' asks section too, srry ig😭😭)

Sooo, it's been two fucking days since I got my fucking dream life!!!😭😭😭😭 I revised sooo many things and especially since I'm an ARMY(fan of BTS) I manifested/revised A BUNCH OF THINGS

I manifested/revised knowing them very very earlier(debut time)

I revised that I went to many many concerts(at first I was like "wouldn't this be.. "wrong" to manifest I went to all concerts??" but after some little time I remembered that this is my reality + if the fact that i went to all their concerts would make me happy THEN BITCH WHY NOT😭😭😭) I swear there are SO many photos and videos from their concerts on my phone OH I ALSO MANIFESTED MY DREAM PHONE😭😭😭 which is a s20 bts edition samsung , it's become my dream phone from the moment it came out, many people were hopeless etc of getting it because it's apparently sold out but i never really felt that way, especially after getting to know void state and manifestation i just became even more hopeful about that, btw I had some beginner luck the first time I entered this state, but then it felt like I just couldn't be it again 😭😭 but LITERALLY 2 DAYS AGO I DID IT AND FOR SOME REASON(GOOD!!) I STAYED AN ACTUALLY LONG TIME THERE AND REVISED ANDMANIFESTED SO MANY TJINGS!!!😭😭😭🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

I have all of their albums and many other merchs and most of them are autographed and I KID U NOT I REMEMBER IT SOOOO CLEARLY AND PERFECTLY 😭😭😭😭😭 I also remember their concerts very perfectly ofcc😭😭😭

I woke up in this new house, IT'S REALLY PRETTY I LOVE IT andd i also have a pet ohbmy fucking gosh😭😭😭 It's a puppy golden retriever and it's called a specific name that I've always loved and I always wanted to have a golden retriever called this way SHE'S SUCH A CUTIE BTWW as I was saying i always loved this name and have always been in love with golden retrievers and this specific name ever since I was a kid I would watch lots of golden retriever videos especially puppies back then (I AIN'T KIDDING WHEN I SAY I'M FUCKING OBSESSED WITH THESE CUTIESS!!!🥹🥹❤‍🩹❤‍🩹) her name is so pretty and it actually fits my little baby soooo perfectly 😭😭🥹💝💝💝 I revised I got her like 1 week ago that's why she's such a smol and cute babie🤧 I had this heartwarming feeling when I was affirming for her at the void🥹 I just love her smm and I've been playing with her quite a lot <3 I've also been unboxing some merchs and other things I both manifested and bought(i revised being rich and I STILL CAN'T FULLY BELIEVE IT I MEAN YES BUT IT'S SOOOOO WNVDJSGJXH I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO DESCRIBE IT BUT I LOVE IT I MEAN MY BANK ACCOUNT IS SOOOO HUGE I MEAN I HAVE A LOT OF MONEYYYYYY AND I BOUGHT MANY MANY THINGS ALREADY 😭😭😭😭🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻 omg I can't forget to mention thisss so I have a looot of followers in this tumblr acc THIS IS SO MAGICAL ISWEAR KWMGSJSGD I also have posts from the past, posts abt BTS and others too but mostly BTS and i just remember them so clearly i could be dreaming idk I LOVE THIS😭😭😭😭😭

Also I found two pics of me and tye members together at backstages and the same day while "exploring" my new house i found out i have two frames with these photos🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻 man the fact I remember it all is what makes it all even crazier to me!! I also have this feeling like it was yesterday if u know what I mean <3

I revised showing up on specific BTS vids from Bangtantv's channel like for example BTS pop-up houses and I'm also on some concerts videos from the channel!!!!

I have two armybomb v1 and v3 and one armybomb v2 and SE(special edition), I have all albums and I said earlier 99% of them are autographed I have photos and videos of me at their fansigns and fanmeetings too I also found this P E R F E C T screenshot from when some MVS came out, including their debut mv, the screenshot was from 13 mins ago and I remember it very well as well <333

Now leaving BTS aside for a little, I also revised/manifested having my dream job and dream wardrobe too I'm so in love with my clothes and a dress in specific I just feel like using it EVERY DAY before getting into the state I saw it on Pinterest and it was like love at first sight😅🥹 ofc I remembered it when affirming for my dream wardrobe in void 🫶🏻🫶🏻

I really really wanted to share certain pics here but I prefer sending this on anonymous because I actually don't want people to find out abt this acc and find out that a random ARMY changed it all in her life🤣🤣🥲 but I swear I'm soooo on cloud 9 rnn and I have many things to unbox too well wait I'mma list other things I manifested : dream car, fluency in many languages including Korean ofc! Besides my cutie baby golden retriever i also have 2 cutie cutie kittens they're so lovely and I know they love me a lot like I love them too🥺🥺🩷🩷🩷 already said wardrobe but i also manifested a bunch of accessories and pretty shoes and especially boots too! I manifested being a good swimmer since I've always loved this sport lol(i affirmed that i can hold my breath infinitely idk if this is gonna be dangerous or idk in some way but i tested it on the same day too and yes i truly can hold my breath for a long time😳😁 i revised an account of mine being unbanned because it """had been banned"""(not anymore hehe) by some damn BTS haters but i revised that nothing of it happened and guess what?? I HAVE A POST FROM THE SAME DAY I WOKE UP IN THIS BRAND NEW LIFE!!!! I also manifested specific friends and some magical, spiritual, witchy items as well because I'm a very spiritual person and i loooove tarot cards i manifested a lot of decks and besides that i also manifested incenses, tons of crystals and pretty rocks, a caldron bcz why not lol, there's also a lot of things(not only spiritual and witchy things) that I didn't affirm when I was the void but since our higher selves always knows it damn all, I also had them when I woke up here.

There's so many things I swear I revised like 80% of my past, old life and now I literally have my dream life😭😭😭 I'm aware of skepticals who might say this is fake but I DON'T CARE LMAO VOID IS REAL MANIFESTATION IS REAL I LOVE THEM BOTH AND I DON'T GONNA PROVE MYSELF TO NOBOOOODY especially when it's a fucking skeptical person with no magic in their lives 🤣🤣🤣💅🏻💅🏻

I'm sooo happyyyy I think I'm gonna end this ask now but I may come back later(maybe, cause I'll probably sending this to different accounts who post about void success stories loll, but I'll try to come back later and give some updates if you replied to this ask!), I'll finish unboxing stuff and decorating my dream room even more, I'll also see more photos that I have in my phone from BTS concerts and other things WAAAAIT THIS IS IMPORTANT LOL i have a printer!! I can make my own photocards now loll😭😭🤣🤣 yess i swear this is important, maybe mostly for me but whateeever lol

Everyone who's also on their void state journey or such, I believe in you aaaall i know you all got this too!! Keep going, improving/increasing ur mindset and consciousness etc i know you will get all that you wish soon affff!! <3 thanks for reading this and i feel like saying that if it happens that this disappears in the future then you'll know why lol(universe making things even more truer, meaning that i didn't actually revise it all but i always had it all! AND I MEAN I ACTUALLY DOOOOO😭😭🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻) thanks and I'll go now, bye guyss!! 🥹🥹🩷🩷🩷🩷 I'll update if i can :)

Holy shit just realized how huge this ask is😭😭😭🤣🤣🤣

OMG GIRL IM SO SO HAPPY FOR YOUUOU

literally me when I entered the void

[romanticrivalries]

WHAT ARE THEY? SINCARAZ LORE (WITH RECEIPTS)

The RG final brought in an influx of new fans. Because of my SINCARAZ x called you again edit, I received a lot of inquiries about what happened between them. Since their relationship is complicated—("he means a lot to me" / "we’re good friends" / "aren’t close friends" / they wake up in the morning and think about each other)—and goes ↗️↘️↗️↘️↗️ every other month (Hot N Cold by Katy Perry is quite befitting), I thought I should make this.

Before we join hands and plunge into the rabbit hole, I need to establish how downbad Carlos was (is?) for Jannik. 

His entire face lit up at the mere mention of Jannik:

Exhibit B. I swear, if Carlos had a tail it would start wagging aggressively at the sight of Jannik.

Carlos looking back at Jannik after they parted ways.

He looks back at Jannik a lot. Exhibit B. Exhibit C.

Tbh, his smile during Jannik’s speech in the Rome ‘25 ceremony is incriminating enough:

(Smiling so aggressively his gums are showing… Someone call an ambulance, we’ve got a man down bad.)

Now that that has been established, let’s move on. Buckle up, it’s a long ride.

They first met as teenagers (Carlos was 15, Jannik - 17) in 2019 at the JC Ferrero Challenger Open, held at the academy of Carlos’ coach, Juan Carlos Ferrero. Carlos won. Jannik is the one who approached Carlos first because he wanted to get to know him. 

“I saw the draw coming out and I said, ‘Oh, Carlos Alcaraz, I have no idea who he is!’” said the Italian. “I saw the age and I said, ‘Wow, he’s playing a challenger, it’s amazing.’ And then straight away I was impressed. “After the match, we went to the same locker room … and I was like, ‘When did you start to play tennis?’ And then we started to talk a little bit, because I wanted to get to know him because he was just an amazing talent already back in the day.”

Their first ATP match up was in 2021 at the Rolex Paris Masters. Despite losing, Jannik was the one to say to Carlos at the net: “I hope we play some more.”

And the rest is history: Carlos imprinted on Jannik and has been down bad ever since. Therefore, it can be concluded that Jannik fell first but Carlos fell harder.

Prior to 2024, Jannik and Carlos were quite consistent about referring to each other as good friends.

CARLOS (2022): “[...] and of course, we are great friends outside the court. [...] I talked to him out of the court, by phone, I mean we laughed a lot**, he’s a nice person [...]”

They went jet skiing together after their Umag final, 2022. 

JANNIK (Rolex Shanghai Masters 2023): [...] “We have a very good relationship off the court and I feel like we are good friends, but still, you know, on court there is, uh, this nervous, you know, inside you feel a little bit nervous [...]”

During December of 2023, Jannik and Carlos trained together at the Juan Carlos Ferrero Tennis Academy as preseason preparation. Same place where they met for the first time, btw. A ceremony took place where it was unveiled that the main court would be named after Carlos. Jannik recorded the entire thing on his phone, a video that he never shared on social media.

Many people say their relationship is one-sided, that Jannik doesn’t reciprocate, but this moment alone speaks volumes of how much he cares. Other people were capturing the event, so he didn’t need to, but he still chose to, just for himself and Carlos. It wasn’t something meant to be shared with the public. Not only that, he didn’t just take a quick snap, he recorded the entire thing. It’s characteristic of his introverted, private nature to show he cares in subtle ways like this that aren’t always visible/obvious to the public eye.

Jannik talked about it a little bit over here after the interviewer teases him for taking photos like a fan: “For me, it’s special, they grew up together [...]”

The unshared video should also serve as a reminder that there are likely many other private friendly moments shared between them that we as outsiders will never be privy to, so we shouldn’t base assumptions on the nature of their relationship from what’s said/not said on their social media.

CARLOS' UNWAVERING FAITH IN JANNIK

Carlos believed in Jannik’s potential before most people did. In 2023, he remained steadfast in his claim that Jannik is his biggest rival when people were expecting him to name Djokovic. The media kept trying to coax the Alcaraz vs. Djokovic narrative out of Carlos but he would not budge.

Note: Jannik didn’t have his meteoric breakthrough until 2024 (he was showing signs of it by the end of 2023). Before 2024, Jannik had no Grand Slams and only 1 Masters 1000 title (Canada). In comparison, by that point, Carlos had 2 Grand Slams and 4 Master 1000s. He became the youngest World Number One in ATP rankings history in 2022.

I: The rankings say it’s Novak and Carlos, Carlos and Novak, do you consider him to be your biggest rival at the moment? CARLOS, ROME ‘23: “[...] Probably, Jannik right now is my biggest opponent. We had really great matches, but at the same time really, really tough ones. [...]”

CARLOS, Post-Wimbledon, ‘23: "Having someone there, with whom you fight, with whom you have that battle, that beautiful rivalry, is important to maintain motivation for so long. Right now, I think I have it and I’m not afraid to say it: for me, it’s Sinner at the moment. That beautiful rivalry that we have, those big games that we have played, on big stages. As the years go by there will be better ones and we will fight for the big titles.”

Even Jannik didn't consider himself to be Carlos' biggest rival.

JANNIK, SHANGHAI '23: "But in the other way, I feel like that he [Carlos] has achieved many things more than I did at the moment, and me, personally, I think, at the moment, the biggest rivalry he has is Novak because of certain circumstances of points and World Number One and Grandslams throughout the last two years [...]"

I’ve observed Jannik avoids getting ahead of himself and making presumptions about the future— I’m not sure whether it’s because of superstition, his realistic perspective about the rapidly-changing brutal nature of tennis as a competitive sport or something else —which is why he doesn’t entertain talks about the future of their rivalry as easily as Carlos does.

At the time, this raised a lot of eyebrows, but Carlos predicted Jannik would become World Number One in 2024, which Jannik did. The reason behind the skepticism was that in 2023 the World Number One title had gone back-and-forth between Djokovic and Carlos until Djokovic emerged on top as the Year-end World Number One. Djokovic won all the slams apart from Wimbledon, which was won by Carlos. So, people were expecting a similar pattern in 2024.

LANGUAGE(S) THEY COMMUNICATE IN:

In 2022, Carlos said they both communicate in Spanish. On the other hand, Jannik said he speaks in Italian while Carlos speaks in Spanish.

CARLOS: [...] We speak Spanish. I don’t know how to speak Italian. At the moment, we speak Spanish. (Source) Interviewer: “His [Jannik’s] Spanish is good?” CARLOS: “Yeah, he’s good. He has to improve, but his Spanish is good.”

JANNIK: “Sometimes we talk in the locker room. He speaks in Spanish and I speak in Italian, so we talk kind of mixed. But I think we understand us very well. Off court we are friends, we are good friends. I mean, also now after his match and my match, we saw each other in the ice bath. I think we are in a good relationship which hopefully can live for many years because this is the most important.” (Source)

(A/N: Fast forward to the trophy ceremony in Rome 2025, where Carlos told Jannik to speak in Italian because he understands, while Carlos gave his speech to Jannik in English because Jannik’s Spanish isn’t that good [?])

BOTH ARE ALIKE OFF-COURT:

Because of their contrasting personalities, I’ve seen people make assumptions that they don’t mesh well off-court or wonder whether they have anything in common to talk about outside of tennis, but they’re actually quite similar off the court and get along well. In particular, they both place a lot of value on honesty, integrity, and being good people. They both keep close to their small circles. 

DARREN CAHILL (JANNIK’S COACH), 2024: “Two young, great kids, not just on the court but off the court as well. Their friendship is real. They both respect each other and like each other and you’ll see that on the court tomorrow regardless of who wins [...]”

DARREN CAHILL (JANNIK’S COACH), 2024: “I think Carlos is very similar to Jannik in both the way they play with the excitement level they bring to the game, and their personalities and their likability. Both guys are incredibly alike off the court. They both like each other.”

JANNIK: "It's easy for Carlos and me to get along. We are quite similar off the court. When we play, however, we are a bit different, but that's normal, it's our nature. Off court, I listen to him, I get the feeling he likes to be surrounded by the people closest to him, as I am. Carlos pushes me to be a better player."

JANNIK, SHANGHAI 2024: “[...] For me it’s nice that we’re rivals on the court and friends off the court [...] Off the court, we are quite similar, because we surround ourselves with our close ones, we like to stay with the team, um, you know there are many, many things, similar things I feel like [...]”

Alcaraz said of Sinner: “I always say you have to be a good person first and athletics comes after that. Jannik thinks the same thing.”

DARREN CAHILL (JANNIK’S COACH), 2025: “Now Carlos and Jannik aren’t going out to dinner together either, but they are mates. They’re in the locker room, they’re talking. I’m part of some of their conversations. I won’t repeat what they are because most of it focuses around what 23-year-olds and 21-year-olds talk about, but they have fun, and they enjoy each other’s company.”

They’re both big football fans.

So you won’t be dropping Carlitos a text if Italy beats Spain in their group-stage match? [JANNIK] No, I will never do that… [Pauses to laugh and grins]... Maybe!

ON-AND-OFF DIVORCE ERA A.K.A We’re so back / It’s so over / We’re so fucking back / it’s joeover

They forgot to sit down and define the relationship, so were on completely different pages for a good part of 2024.

Things were looking good in Indian Wells.

They were high-fiving and chatting each other up in the tunnel before their match, Carlos waited for Jannik so they could leave the court together when the match was delayed because of rain, giggling together as they left the court (bonus: carlos patting Jannik’s b—), sat together in the locker room and talked about life, also laughed about:

CARLOS, INDIAN WELLS 24: “Well, we were laughing about it with Jannik when it [match] suspended, because I had bees, had the rain.”

Things changed around Miami.

While Carlos was waxing poetic about their futures:

“Hopefully Jannik and I both have a long and beautiful future ahead of us.” (N: Oddly romantic thing to say: sounds like Carlos wants to spend the rest of their lives together.) CARLOS, MIAMI 2024

Also, Carlos saying more downbad and incriminating things like: “He means a lot to me.” (INDIAN WELLS ‘24) 

For the first time, in Miami 2024, Jannik defines their relationship as not that close as previously painted:

“[...] We have a lot of respect for each other and, obviously, off the court we don't speak that much because he has his own things and I have my things."

Some of the reactions from this reddit thread are worth a read, lol.

(Skipping a major arc: Roland Garros '24)

Things started looking good again months later during Beijing. Chatting in the gym (part 1, part 2). Carlos was looking to give Zendaya a run for her money the way he was laughing in part 1. I would say Jannik isn’t that funny, but too many people close to him have said otherwise, so maybe he is indeed just that funny.

Just look at them during the trophy ceremony. 

“I respect you a lot as a player but even more as a person” was very much needed after all the noise that had reemerged with the WADA appeal.

Jannik and Carlos greet each other’s teams.

They shared a flight together after their final:

Carlos’ interview about it. Jannik’s interview about it (his little giggle when asked about the photo was so cute).

During Shanghai, someone pulled Uno reverse, because now Jannik was talking about how they’re friends off court but Carlos was like we’re not that close.

CARLOS, SHANGHAI ‘24: "We don't talk too much when we are around. Obviously, we have a really good relationship off the court as well. I think we both respect each other a lot, as a player, as a person, but once we are on tour traveling, you know, during tournaments when we are on-site, we are with our team, on our own, so we don't speak too much. When we can, we talk a little bit besides tennis about life a little bit, but not too much. It means, we have a good relationship, but we are not close friends, you know, but I think the respect that we have, you know, put [us] in a position that we have a really good relationship."

For renowned downbad Carlos to say this, the people were certainly shocked. He managed to fight off the allegations until he lost the war by cheesin’ so hard just because Jannik grouped him as a legend during the trophy ceremony in Shanghai (the final was between Jannik and Djokovic but Carlos was there to watch).

Just look at him:

Their exhibition final, SIX KINGS SLAM ‘24 was a gift that kept on giving:

Silly confusion because the announcer got their walkout order wrong, Jannik removed confetti from Carlos’ hair, Jannik—I wake up in the morning thinking about Carlos—Sinner, Carlos refused to let go of Jannik, bench talks etc.

I: So, did you just tell us that everyday you wake up you think about him [Carlos]?

(The interviewer decided to choose violence and not let that insane statement from Jannik go by unnoticed by everyone in that stadium)

JANNIK: [Flustered pause] “Well, no, I mean… [Jannik laughs in panic while Carlos looks utterly delighted] It would be strange, no?”

(The interviewer had to intercede and save him.)

I: “In practice terms."

(Love how the interviewer said this in such a pointed way, like gay boy your mind went there by itself, I was talking about practice)

I: "He’s your biggest rival, isn’t he, over the next few years. Do you still get on as friends?”

JANNIK: “I mean, we understand each other very well. We travel a lot. We are, I would say good friends [turns to check with Carlos, who nods], you know. Not obviously the best out of the best, but y‘know, we also like to share every time when we go on the court. We try to enjoy [...]”

Carlos decided to send signals to Jannik during his press conference that he wants to be friends:

“[...] We don’t spend too much time together off the court, but I would love to.”

He WOULD LOVE TO. Jannik did that blazing signal manage to transmit through your thick curls?

I really liked this comment on their relationship:

It explains everything pretty well.

It's hard to be friends with the person who is responsible for chipping away your soul and body in a grueling battle that lasts for hours, who rips your heart into pieces by squashing your dreams and taking the one thing you wanted the most (when it was nearly within reach).

Poor Jannik has cried enough times because of Carlos 😭

“Tears of happiness? I haven’t had them yet. [I cried] after [losing to] Carlos in the US Open, also a bit at Roland Garros,” Jannik adds. “There are always moments when you feel emotions you don’t want in the locker room or sometimes when you’re in transportation or even in the hotel room alone. It means you care about the sport. It means you want to reach this level." (Source / 2024)

I liked this analysis on them.

FOR JUST CO-WORKERS, THEY’RE TOTALLY NORMAL ABOUT EACH OTHER:

They both wake up in the morning and think about each other.

Carlos [about Jannik during Roland Garros ‘24]: "...to wake up in the morning and want to improve my game to try to beat him..." [Source]

Jannik [about Carlos on two different occasions]: "...he pushes me to do better. I wake up in the morning trying to understand what I can do better trying to beat him next time, which is something nice for me as a player." [Source]

Jannik: "...we try to push ourselves to the limits, you know, I wake up in the morning trying to understand the ways how to beat him and you know this kind of rivalries and this kind of players they push us always to our 100% limit..." [Source]

CARLOS, SHANGHAI ‘23: “[...] Against him, as I said, it’s different.”

JANNIK, SHANGHAI ‘24: “[...] It’s like fire and ice, a bit [...]”

Interviewer: “Carlos was in here, and he said it really hurts to lose against you. Especially against you. Do you love to win, especially against him?” JANNIK: “[...] Obviously, both of us, we hate losing, especially against each other.”

CARLOS, INDIAN WELLS ‘24: “I mean, I hear some declarations from Tommy Paul that was funny for me, that he's [Jannik’s] absolutely naked right now. He’s playing naked, so [...]” (Source) / “I hear some words from Tommy Paul that he’s [Jannik’s] playing absolutely naked, so he’s right [...]” (Source)

Guess he liked the thought of Jannik playing absolutely naked so much that he had to mention it more than once. Alright.

CARLOS, ROLAND GARROS ‘24: “That’s when I thought, ‘Jannik, if you really want to beat me, you’re gonna have to take me out on a stretcher.’”

“Everything he does, he does it perfectly.”

CARLOS, ROME ‘25: “[...] Honestly, I’m going to say I need him in the tour [...]” / “I’m not going to get tired of saying, y’know, how amazing a person, athlete you are.”

JANNIK, ROLAND GARROS ‘25: “He’s [Carlos’] a player with charisma, with that aura. The moment he steps on court, you can feel his presence.”

CARLOS, ROME ‘25: I'm more focused when I'm playing against him, or I feel a little bit different when I'm going to face him than other players. He has that aura. When you're seeing him on the other side of the net, it's different.”

Where’s that twitter post that went along the lines of: aura is basically you calling another man attractive

CARLOS, ROLAND GARROS ‘25: “[...] It’s a privilege to share the court with you, in every tournament, making history with you.” 

Not to be cheesy and quote Red, White & Royal Blue, but: “History, huh?”

We've only scratched the surface here (their divorce 2.0 still remains unearthed), but this post has gotten too long, so I'm going to end it here. Hopefully, this proves useful to someone.

[miajooz]

hello my loves! i’d like to talk about something important going on in america because it’s not okay AT ALL. as of recently, ICE (immigration and customs enforcement) has been raiding LA in a horrific way. children are being taken, families are being separated, friends are disappearing, it’s absolutely fucking disgusting what is happening. there’s no defense for this at all, arresting people without a warrant IS AGAINST THE LAW. IT IS UNCONSTITUTIONAL. this is the exact thing kamala and the harris administration warned us about, i am ashamed of all the people in my life who have voted for this sick, inhumane treatment being inflicted upon fellow people in this country. In no way is such lack of empathy and coldness against HUMAN BEINGS okay. the children, the families, it’s SICK.

recently, ICE has been targeting hard working families and innocent people. trump claims to be targeting violent criminals which is BULLSHIT. was that pregnant woman a violent criminal? what about the children being separated from their families? what about the hard working immigrants who literally helped america be what it is in the first place. if you open a history book or did research you would know that. you can’t claim to be getting rid of violent criminals WHEN YOU ARE A FELON. TRUMP WASNT PROVEN INNOCENT, HE IS A CONVICTED FELON. how can you support this shit but vote for a criminal to run our country? YOU CANNOT BE ILLEGAL ON STOLEN LAND. EVERYONE IN AMERICA IS AN IMMIGRANT BESIDES THE NATIVES. this country was stolen, and anyone who says otherwise is ignorant.

ICE has been raiding and sent to places that are densely populated with immigrants, JUST TO ARREST THEM. rounding people up who have legal documents, who are US citizens, who were born here. rounding people up because of the color of their skin is inhumane and absolutely repulsive. criminals aren’t being targeted, and have you seen the prison in el salvador? it’s HORRIFIC.

in LA, there have been a lot of protests, most of which were peaceful. california’s OWN officers were went to keep things peaceful which was partly successful. protesting is a first amendment right, but the freedom of speech has been violated ever since trump has went into office. tear gas, rubber bullets, flash bang grenades, all of that have been used on protesters. and without consulting any california law enforcement members, trump deployed 2000 state national guard members to the streets of LA. that is also ILLEGAL. THAT IS UNACCEPTABLE. and to the troops who were deployed, YOU SWORE AN OATH TO SERVE THE COUNTRY AND PEOPLE AND PROTECT THE CONSTITUTION. NOT A FACIST FELON WHO IS CAUSING A CONSTITUTIONAL CRISIS. deploying troops without the consent of the state is federal aggression, and shouldn’t be tolerated. you guys are bitching about immigrants and saying they’re violent criminals? look at all the shit trump is doing! many veterans are absolutely devastated and it’s so sad to see. sending troops to attack american citizens is absolutely disgusting. this is the most obvious violation of the first amendment.

america’s democracy is at risk. donald trump doesn’t want a constitution, he’s a man child who bitches and uses violence when people don’t agree with him or oppose him. social media is being censored, he is targeting education, he is filtering everything—he literally DEFUNDED THE BOARD OF EDUCATION. education is the most dangerous weapon against dictators, so that checks out. if this isn’t a start to a dictatorship i don’t know what is, it’s here. these 4 years could be absolutely horrific, not to mention how he wants to ignore the precedent and “run again.” WHO WANTS THAT?

to all the people who have been affected by this, i am so, so sorry. it is repulsive what is happening, and i am sending love to all the families and individuals who have been hurt. to all the protesters who have been hurt, and to everyone this country has literally failed. to the women being denied life saving treatment in emergency rooms, to the women in my state who can’t get an abortion, it’s just horrific. to all the people who have been hurt during protests in LA, you deserve to be recognized. thank you for being a voice, you are valid and you are amazing and you deserve to be heard.

despite all of this, DO NOT STAY SILENT. that’s what he wants, he doesn’t want opposers. you are free to speak, that is the first amendment and cannot be violated. talk about it, don’t be scared to talk about it. the people are what makes a country, we shouldn’t be separated and on the brink of a civil war. it’s not right, why are we looking at people in such a selfish, ignorant way? this isn’t about being red or blue, this is our DEMOCRACY and the fact we are in a human rights crisis. this is about the fact that people are scared, communities are traumatized. people should be joining together and helping each other, do not normalize apathy. people are meant to love and join together, nobody should have this kind of power and influence on human lives in such a horrible way.

we are all people, you are all valid people. keep protesting, keep using your voice because it is POWERFUL. i love you all so unbelievably much, please, please don’t be ignorant.

Speech from Governor Newsom this addresses california!

[wooahaeruby]

To You Extras

Author's Notes

I'm dying from illness but I finished this last week and I am here today to finally post it for you. Take it....

To You Masterlist | Main Masterlist

Stress

You could feel it in the air, the tension that was building. 

It was a stressful time, Seventeen were in the middle of preparing and finishing for their upcoming comeback, their 10th anniversary just around the corner. There was mention of a concert on a bridge. You’ve seen them through previous comebacks, seen the stress of getting things done before Jeonghan left for the military, and now with Wonwoo. They recorded the video just before the 96-liner left for his mandatory service, but that didn’t slow any of the members or the staff down.

This felt different though, you couldn’t properly explain it. Like they were placing too many expectations on themselves, more than usual.

There were a lot of moving parts going on and the group was all a little on edge. You had seen them barely sleep, downing coffee and energy drinks like they were lifeblood, and dieting like no tomorrow. Jihoon was no better, cutting back on eating junk and spending hours at the gym with Seungcheol and Soonyoung. He was spending long hours at Hybe, in the studio or at dance practices. They were filming content for upcoming GoSe and going on different variety shows. 

Things were being prepared for things past the 10th anniversary comeback, with Jihoon going into the military sometime towards the end of the year, same with Soonyoung. There was the stress of flying to LA for Kcon later in the summer too, you didn’t know how everything was being managed.

You barely saw your husband in weeks, even if you lived in the same home. He was like a ghost that came and went only to sleep or shower. The house felt colder, lonely.

You could feel every ounce of stress rolling off of your soulmate bond, and you tried to talk to him about it, wanting to be the shoulder to lean on, but he brushed you off every turn, no matter how hard you tried. 

“I’m fine, Ru.” 

“Don’t worry about it.” 

“Nothing new, drop it please.”

“I’m busy, can we talk about this later?” 

Later never came. You didn’t think it ever would.

Really, you weren’t any better with your own work. 

Three people got fired or quit, two people got transferred for whatever reason, and you were the only one that was able to pick up the slack. It sucked, truly, shouldering so much. When you weren’t worried about Jihoon or trying to spend time with him, you were working, sometimes you worked until you dropped because you had nothing else to do with your soulmate gone all the time. You started to go out less and less to focus on work, or, that was what you told yourself. It stung, the loneliness. You thought you would have gotten used to it after the time together, the comebacks you’ve been around for, the stress that permeates the air during that time, but you haven't. This felt a million times worse.

And Jihoon never asked you how you were doing…Not once since things went into overdrive.

Jihoon was exhausted, you could feel it in the bond when you heard the door open and close behind him. It was late, nearly two in the morning, and he was just getting home. You were wide awake, sitting in the office, working on your never ending to-do list until people were replaced.

He didn’t even say anything as he shuffled past the office, the door wide open so you could hear when he got back.  He didn’t even reply to any of your check-in texts, the one you sent when you woke up and he was gone, or the other around dinner time, asking if he ate anything. That hurt, but you were used to the…forgetfulness recently. You felt like an afterthought.

Jamie and Kazuha would have beat your ass if you told them that, then they would be on the first flight out to actually beat up Jihoon, so you kept that to yourself.

“‘Hoon?” You called out, but got no reply, so you stood, finally shutting off your computer after hours of work and letting your feet lead you to the bedroom. 

Jihoon had already tossed his bag and sweatshirt onto the floor to be forgotten until the morning when he got up and started the same routine all over again. 

“Jihoon?” You stood at the door, arms crossed over your chest, his back to you as he grabbed clothes out of the closet. You could see how slow he was moving, the energy sapped from a long day of work.

You heard the sigh and it shook you to your core for some reason. Reaching into the bond, annoyance laced the exhaustion. 

“What, Ru? I’m tired.”

“Are you okay? You’ve been getting home later and-” 

“Can we talk about this another time?” He cut you off and you shut your mouth tightly. “I need to be up early tomorrow for something then practice and I need some sleep. I’m worn out.” It sounded so dismissive…

You wanted to argue, to tell him you couldn’t wait, because not talking to him, not being about to help, not having your soulmate around, was eating you up inside, but when he looked over at you, a hollowness to his gaze, something stopped you from trying. 

“Okay.” The words came out more as a whisper as Jihoon disappeared into the bathroom to wash up. 

You knew Jihoon felt what you felt, how you had been feeling for a while now, but for some reason, it was almost like he didn’t care.

Defeated, you grabbed some clothes while he showered and walked out of the master bedroom into the guest room, hurt and upset at the deflection and lack of care from him. You curled up under the comforter, missing the feeling of your husband’s arms wrapped around your, but you refused to cry, refused to give the bond the satisfaction of knowing you were a little broken inside, rightfully so. 

If he wasn’t going to care, you weren’t either, as petty as it was. 

He was gone before you even woke up, no shocker there, but you were happy to see a text from Mingyu and Seokmin, asking how you were. 

At least someone cared. 

You didn’t dump your stress on them, that isn’t what friends do at this time, however, you did tell them you were just busy with work and having a hard time keeping it. They, unlike your husband, sent you text after text of encouragement, as you did with them for the comeback, expressing your excitement to see what was in store for the album. You knew very little about the comeback with the dead zone that was communication with Jihoon. 

They had practice in the afternoon before the day ended early for the first time in weeks, asking if you wanted to catch dinner with them and Minghao. With no plans, obviously, you agreed, and they let you know to come before practice ended and you’d just go together instead of meeting somewhere. 

Despite the pettiness that was running through your veins, you tried to text Jihoon, as you did less and less every day, to check in. This one more of a test than anything. In the afternoon, you send a short message, asking if the day was okay and if he was alright, but you were left on read and you weren’t sad about it, you were mad and bitter. 

You got some work done before the time you agreed to go to Hybe to meet up with 97-line, but you were distracted. The bond was humming, pushing and pulling you, and you didn’t like it currently, not with the bubbling annoyance in your own heart. It was probably trying to tell you that you needed to be close to Jihoon, but it couldn’t communicate with you with words. There was a hint of remorse from Jihoon, for what, you didn’t know nor really cared at the moment.  

“Ru!” Mingyu was bouncing up from where he sat on the floor when he saw your reflection in the mirrors of the dance studio. “We are almost done-” 

“It’s okay, I know I’m a little early.” You smiled, and for the first time in weeks, it reached your eyes.

“Hey, Ruby,” Seungcheol greeted, waving from where he sat at Mingyu’s feet now. “Haven’t seen you in a while, how’s it going?”

“Things are going. Busy as can be with some issues at work.” 

With a quick glance around, you spotted Jihoon with Soonyoung and Joshua, working on perfecting some moves, not even noticing your presence. Your face twisted a bit in annoyance and Jihoon sputtered in his movements, catching your eye in the mirror before you glanced back at the leader. 

“How is comeback prep going? You’ve all been busy for weeks.” 

Seungcheol, though clearly tired, grinned. “It’s kicking ass but nothing we can’t handle. We have a lot planned and going on, changing stuff since Jeonghan and Wonwoo aren’t here, but it’s all working out.” 

It was nice talking to someone… 

“I’m glad to hear. I’m excited to see what’s coming out.” 

A flash of confusion crossed Seungcheol’s face, eyebrows furrowing together. “Jihoon said he was going to show you what we had going on. He-” 

“Ruby!” Seokmin entered the room, shouting your nickname dramatically as he ran over, tugging you into his arms. He was covered in sweat and you cringed, face scrunching up in disgust at the stickiness of his skin against yours. Dramatic as ever, he cradled you in his hold, rocking back and forth. “Ruby, I’ve missed you so much! I’ve missed talking to you. I’ve missed your snacks and all the amazing food! I need this comeback to be over so you can show me how to cook all the delicious meals you know-” 

You were going to come back to Seugncheol’s comment real soon, but you tried to push Seokmin off of you, struggling in his old. 

“Let me go- You are gross! I missed you but not your practice stink!” You couldn’t help the laughter that fluttered from your chest, hating it, but savoring the closeness of your friend, even if he needed a shower, bad. 

Jealousy came from the bond and you had to stop yourself from rolling your eyes. He had no right to feel jealous right now.

When Seokmin released you, you made no move to look where Jihoon was and focused on Seungcheol. 

“I never saw anything.” You didn’t stop yourself from saying it outloud, and Seungcheol must have understood from how his eyes widened and the look that crossed his face was full of disappointment.  

“Nothing?” He said quietly and you shook your head. 

On instinct, you messed with the wedding rings on your left hand, a habit you picked up since you got the first for your engagement. It gave you something to do with your hands. Seungcheol’s eyes darted to your hands then your face and he looked apologetic, like he was at fault but you turned your attention to Mingyu, wanting to change the subject. 

“Where are we going to dinner? You said Minghao was joining?” 

“BBQ.” He said with a triumphant grin. “Cheat day!” 

Once more, you couldn’t stop your laughter, nodding. “Sure, okay.” 

“You can wait in here or something, we need to do another run through before we are free. We were going to change before we head out too so it might be a bit.” 

“I’ll manage, I might go see where Hyeji is.” 

“She is out today.” Seokmin added and you had to keep your smile from faltering. 

“Damn. I think I’ll just keep wondering until you are done.”

Mingyu frowned. “You usually stay for practice when you come.” 

“Mingyu, don’t.” Seungcheol warned quietly but that only made Mingyu frown deepen and Seokmin cock his head to the side. 

“What’s going on?” 

“Nothing, I’ll see you guys later.” You continued to smile even if it didn’t reach your eyes anymore and turned to leave, nearly reaching the door when a hand wrapped around your wrist gently to stop you. 

“Ruby,” The bond hummed at the contact from Jihoon’s hand. “Are you okay?” 

You stared out the open door for a moment, breath caught in your chest, before you turned to see your wrist in his hand, then looked to find concern in his eyes. Concern he hasn’t had for weeks. 

You didn’t know what came over you. 

“Why do you care?” 

You swore a pin could drop with how quiet it got at your question. 

“What?” 

“I said, why do you care?” 

Irritation came from his side of the bond and you bit the inside of your cheek. 

“Well, it’s not like I’m your husband or anything, my bad for asking. Not like you asked me how I’ve been doing-” 

You don’t know who gasped but you didn’t break your gaze from him and your body was on fire. 

“Are you fucking kidding me right now, Jihoon?” You scoffed, pulling your hand back, even if the bond begged you to hold on. “I haven’t asked you? Really? I’ve been asking you for weeks, I asked you last night and you blew me off for the hundredth time. ‘Not right now, Ruby, I’m tired’. ‘Can this wait? I’m busy.’ Seriously? You’ve barely spoken to or seen me in weeks, Jihoon. I’ve asked you if you were okay, I’ve texted you, only to be left on read, and treated like an afterthought. You haven’t asked me how I’ve been, why I’ve been awake at two in the morning when you are coming home.”

“I thought you were just waiting for me-” 

You laughed, disbelief flooding all your senses. “You thought I was always waiting on you? Of course, because everything recently has been about you. Everything. Not like you haven’t felt how upset I am, or maybe you just didn’t care.” 

“I care!” He raised his voice and you didn’t even flinch. 

“Yeah, because blowing off your significant other and making them feel like an afterthought when they’ve done everything to try and be patient with your life is caring, Jihoon.” You took a breath, clenching your fists. “Maybe you should revisit those vows you wrote, ‘I promise that I will protect you and assure you that you are enough.’ or ‘a shoulder to lean on when life is too difficult to bear on your own’. Remember those?” 

Your heart hurt bringing up his wedding vows to you, it felt spiteful. A slap in the face. A little part of you knew he deserved it but the pain that crossed his expression seemed to be the moment he regretted his own actions. 

“Mingyu, Seokmin, I think I’m gonna have to pass on dinner.” You dropped your eyes, clearing your throat. “Sorry for ruining the rest of practice.” 

Turning quickly, you left the practice room, the call of your name all that was heard behind you. You didn’t look back, squaring your shoulders as you took the stairs down, two steps at a time, and struggled to hold in the tears that were threatening to fall. 

The sun was still out, the day not yet turning to night, but you had no destination in mind as you started down the crowded streets within Seoul. You took a turn here, another there, the streets blurring together as your vision started to get fuzzy with unshed tears. Digging into your bag, you pulled out a mask and quickly put it over your face, needing all the privacy you could while wandering the streets. 

You knew you had a shadow, Jisung was a little hard not to spot with his height and build, and the fact he was on your tail but a respectable distance away to give some privacy, was nice. You confirmed it when you glanced in the windows of a building and saw him quickly texting someone, probably Jihoon, before pocketing the device. 

You made it to a clear spot along the Han River, staring out to the water, watching the small ripples in the water pass you. Your tears flowed but you didn’t sob, wiping them away with the sleeve of your shirt in personal silence with the world chattering around you. Jisung stepped up to your side at some point, joining your silence, hands shoved in his pocket. 

Closing your eyes, you picked up on the regret and shame from Jihoon’s side of the bond, the sadness and worry that crossed the strings connecting you. 

“For the record,” Jisung started, “I think his actions were horrible.” 

“Thanks for the support,” You replied flatly, voice a little choked up, as your eyes never left the river. “Who were you texting?”

“Seungcheol,” He continued in English. “He asked me to go after you just in case.” 

“Makes sense.” Rubbing your eyes, you dropped your shoulders, sighing. “Relationships suck, don’t find your soulmate.” 

Jisung laughed, it started small before he couldn’t hold back the chuckle freely. “Don’t say that, you love Jihoon, Jihoon loves you. You both are just in a fight that you need to talk about what’s bothering you.” 

“The problem is that I wanna beat him up for his audacity earlier.” 

“You have every right to be harsh with him, don’t actually beat him up, you’ll feel bad.” 

Neither of you spoke as a slow breeze swept past you, the slight chill enough to get you breathing more steadily. 

“Is it bad that I don’t wanna go home?” 

Jisung shrugged, “Maybe, maybe not, but you will have to go somewhere to sleep tonight.” 

“That is if I sleep.” 

“Fine, you need someplace to stay tonight because I would like to be home at a reasonable time to sleep.” 

“Fair enough.” 

You stayed standing at the edge of the Han River until the sun had set beyond the still bustling city to wake another part of the world, Jihoon’s emotions getting to you once more as tears sprung down your cheeks here and there. 

You didn’t really regret what you said, it needed to be said, you just regretted that it was said in front of the guys, staff, and others that didn’t need to hear your fight with your soulmate. You hated that he made it about himself in regards to your actions, like your entire being revolved around him when you were drowning in your own emotions and work stress. It felt like a stab to the heart that he didn’t care enough to think you had your own problems. He couldn’t blame the stress of the comeback and work on that, it couldn’t be an excuse. He had a lot of explaining to do about his actions. 

Jisung called a cab to take you to Mingyu’s place after you gave him a call and he agreed without hesitation. You parted from the bodyguard with a quick hug neither of you would bring up later, and you promised to text him when you got to the apartment. 

By the time you arrived, Joshua and Minghao were already in Mingyu and Wonwoo’s apartment. Mingyu was ordering food while you sunk into the couch with Joshua and Minghao at your sides, letting you take a breather before any proper conversation was had. 

Minghao didn’t look too happy, but he tried to look neutral, but Joshua and Mingyu were somewhere between conflicted and concerned. 

“You okay?” Minghao asked first, sitting criss-cross at your side. 

“As okay as I can be right now. My heart hurts a lot, but that’s expected.”

“He felt really bad, Ruby.” Joshua sighed, “And I’m not condoning his actions, but when you left, it…practice had to end early.” 

When food arrived, you listened to the three try and explain how everything was left. 

Jihoon called out your name when you left and no one knew what to say. Seungcheol asked all the staff to leave and the guys were left to figure out Jihoon who was standing at the door like a statue. Soonyoung tried to say something but Seungkwan slapped a hand over the older man’s mouth so he wouldn’t say anything stupid or set off a whole other issue. 

They said Jihoon looked like he saw a ghost as he pulled him from the door towards their little huddle. Joshua added that he was staring down at his wedding band, opening his mouth, only to close it moments after. It took some time to coax words from him, only for ‘I fucked up’ to leave him and tears started to well up in his eyes. Seventeen panicked as they did other times Jihoon cried because he wasn’t a crier and none of them knew how to handle the fight because it wasn’t their fight to intervene in. 

Minghao snarked that it shouldn’t have been a fight to begin with if Jihoon’s head wasn’t in his ass. Joshua hit him on the shoulder and Mingyu clicked his tongue, not fully defending their friend, but not really disagreeing. 

Mingyu went on to explain that your soulmate started to ramble about how bad he fucked up, asking how he could make up for it, what he could do, anything, and a lot said he needed to wait for you to go to him and he needed to apologize badly. Seungcheol was first to ask if Jihoon was ignoring your messages, which he did admit he was but not intentionally, how the messages you sent were read, and when he went to reply, something always came up to distract him. He admitted that it wasn’t an excuse, but his mind was all over the place so he kept forgetting. 

You listened as Minghao went on to add that the days he stayed late were for his own shit in the studio, not group practice, recordings, or anything that needed to be done right away. It was stuff that could wait until after the comeback to start being worked on again because he was so far ahead. 

Joshua stopped Minghao before he could say anything more damaging based on how you shrunk in on yourself, heart on your sleeve at how much your heart continued to hear. Mingyu said you could stay as long as you could with the bond, but you really needed to go home and talk to him yourself. Seungcheol had texted Mingyu that they (him and Soonyoung, you learned) were leaving your home since Jihoon wanted some space to think. 

The bond still ached, the hurt, the pain, the shame, all of it was still pulsing between your soul, string pulled taut, squeezing your heart. 

You agreed to go home once the group finished eating and you helped Mingyu clean up, he tried to stop you but you hip checked him the best you could and cleaned, needing to do something. Minghao offered to drive you home since you were on the way back to his place, saying goodbye to Joshua and Mingyu with tight hugs and them telling you good luck.

The lights were off when you got home, but you could feel the hum in your bones, the soulbond vibrating to life as it did millions of other times. It pulled you forward, leaving your bag at the door and your steps brought you to the master bedroom. The only light one was the small bedside lamp you bought when you didn’t want the whole room bright in the morning. 

Jihoon sat against the headboard, arms slack in his lap, twisting his wedding band like you did when nervous, and eyes staring blankly out in front of him. Though you didn’t make a sound, his head whipped up, feeling the same pull from your soul. There was a dullness to his eyes, regret still prevalent, sorrow even. 

“You’re back.” It was worded more like a question, probably not believing you were coming back at all that night. 

“Thought it was best we…talk.” 

“Ruby…” He started to move off the bed, stumbling over the blankets, nearly falling flat on his face. Jihoon caught himself easily, stepping up to you with hesitation. His hands were held out in front of him, scared to touch you, letting his eyes flit around, watching you for any sign of discomfort. “I’m so fucking sorry.” 

Jihoon dropped to his knees quickly, surprise having your shoulders tense up, and he took your hands into his. The bond buzzed with warmth despite the cold chill in your bones from the last couple hours, haunting you.

“Jihoon-” 

“No, love, please, I fucked up so bad, I’m so sorry-” Sadness pierced your soul as he dropped his head, more than likely trying to hide his tears. “You were right, I made you feel like an afterthought, I was selfish, I was such a dick, You deserve to be mad at me forever for god's sake-” 

His hand shook in yours, a testament to the emotions you felt but couldn’t see. Kneeling down, you saw a tear hit the floor, the subtle shake of his shoulder. 

“Please don’t think I’m trying to manipulate you by being all emotional,” Jihoon sighed out the words, voice wrecked already. “I talked with Cheol and Soonyoung for so long and they called me a lot of mean shit, but they were right. You’ve been so patient and I’ve completely ignored everything you’ve tried to do. I wasn’t there for you because I was only thinking about myself. I know you felt stressed and overwhelmed, but I told myself you had others to rely on when I couldn’t be there mentally or physically. It isn’t an excuse- I’m not trying to make them, I just really want to explain what was going through my head-” 

Each word trembled, trying to keep himself from the inevitable that you could feel was coming. You said a lot earlier and Jihoon didn’t say anything, so you allowed him to go on, saying what he needed to say. 

He sucked in a breath, pushing it out shakily. “I am the world’s shittiest husband for how I treated you, Ru. I made a promise when we got married that I’d stand by you, be there for you, and I failed in that recently. I’m so so sorry.” 

“Come on.” You tugged on his hands, “Come sit with me.”

“I don’t deserve to right now.” Your heart clenched and tears started to blur your vision, but pushed through, tugging once more. 

“And I don’t wanna sit on the hard ass floor while you cry, please.” 

With little resistance, Jihoon followed you to his feet, head still dropped, sniffles heard as he took shaky breaths. You walked him to the bed, sitting on the edge before he took the space beside you. You released one of his hands, reaching across the distance to lift his head with a finger under his chin. He tried to fight it, but gave up easily, meeting your eyes with a pout plastered on his lips. His eyes were red and puffy, a kicked puppy look that he was attempting to fix, but he looked away from you, eyes landing on the hand held in yours. 

“I’m sorry.” Defeat sprung in the bond. “And please don’t forgive me because I’m crying here and apologizing so much, be mad at me for how horrible I was, kick me to the other room, just don’t stay somewhere else, please.” 

“I think this is the most I’ve heard you say please in the few years I’ve known you.” You tried to joke but Jihoon groaned. “But I am still mad at you, even if you look like a puppy, and I can still be mad at you while sleeping next to you. I can still be mad at you while you sleep on the other side of the bed and give me space.” 

“I’ll do anything to make this up to you, I promise, anything.” He ran his fingers over your wedding band, the ruby muted in the dull yellow light of the lamp. “I’m going to come home right after practice, I’ll try and make all your favorite foods-” 

“One step at a time, I don’t want food poisoning again.” 

“It was one accident-” He threw his head back, grumbling out in complaint, even if the statement was true. 

“But…” You grabbed his chin, making him look at you in the eyes. “The first thing you can do to make it up to me is show me what the new album is since, apparently, you said you would but never did.” 

The familiar jingle of his laughter was enough to get a  timid smile from you. 

“And you are ordering me ice cream, now.” 

“Anything you want, any time, forever.”

You knew you went to bed separated from Jihoon, him sticking to the terms you set but there was compromise on being back to back. The closeness was enough to settle your heart and soul, while also lulling you to sleep you didn’t know you needed. 

But, you woke up to strong arms wrapped around your middle, a face pressed into the back of your neck, and legs tangled up with no escape in sight. 

You don’t even know why you tried, but you couldn’t lie, you missed the feeling of being wrapped up, protected and safe. It always felt like home. 

The moment you tried to get up, those same strong arms pulled you down, protests leaving your soulmate. He grumbled tiredly, tightening his arms so there was absolutely no way you could escape. 

“Don’t go.” You somehow heard through his muffled complaints. “Please.” 

Your heart and soul strummed the invisible lines. “I’m still mad at you.” 

“That’s fine,” He cleared the sleepiness from his throat, the feeling of a gentle kiss to your neck following. “Be as mad as you want, for as long as you want, but please just let me hold you. I have a lot to make up for.” 

Permanent Taglist Form

Permanent Taglist: @smiileflower

[sairaverse]

Hiiiiiiiiii😭😭😭 I'm here to share a void success story, it's preeetty recent and I'm still going crazy over it😭😭😭😭 (I'll probably share/spam this on other blogs' asks section too, srry ig😭😭)

Sooo, it's been two fucking days since I got my fucking dream life!!!😭😭😭😭 I revised sooo many things and especially since I'm an ARMY(fan of BTS) I manifested/revised A BUNCH OF THINGS

I manifested/revised knowing them very very earlier(debut time)

I revised that I went to many many concerts(at first I was like "wouldn't this be.. "wrong" to manifest I went to all concerts??" but after some little time I remembered that this is my reality + if the fact that i went to all their concerts would make me happy THEN BITCH WHY NOT😭😭😭) I swear there are SO many photos and videos from their concerts on my phone OH I ALSO MANIFESTED MY DREAM PHONE😭😭😭 which is a s20 bts edition samsung , it's become my dream phone from the moment it came out, many people were hopeless etc of getting it because it's apparently sold out but i never really felt that way, especially after getting to know void state and manifestation i just became even more hopeful about that, btw I had some beginner luck the first time I entered this state, but then it felt like I just couldn't be it again 😭😭 but LITERALLY 2 DAYS AGO I DID IT AND FOR SOME REASON(GOOD!!) I STAYED AN ACTUALLY LONG TIME THERE AND REVISED ANDMANIFESTED SO MANY TJINGS!!!😭😭😭🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

I have all of their albums and many other merchs and most of them are autographed and I KID U NOT I REMEMBER IT SOOOO CLEARLY AND PERFECTLY 😭😭😭😭😭 I also remember their concerts very perfectly ofcc😭😭😭

I woke up in this new house, IT'S REALLY PRETTY I LOVE IT andd i also have a pet ohbmy fucking gosh😭😭😭 It's a puppy golden retriever and it's called a specific name that I've always loved and I always wanted to have a golden retriever called this way SHE'S SUCH A CUTIE BTWW as I was saying i always loved this name and have always been in love with golden retrievers and this specific name ever since I was a kid I would watch lots of golden retriever videos especially puppies back then (I AIN'T KIDDING WHEN I SAY I'M FUCKING OBSESSED WITH THESE CUTIESS!!!🥹🥹❤‍🩹❤‍🩹) her name is so pretty and it actually fits my little baby soooo perfectly 😭😭🥹💝💝💝 I revised I got her like 1 week ago that's why she's such a smol and cute babie🤧 I had this heartwarming feeling when I was affirming for her at the void🥹 I just love her smm and I've been playing with her quite a lot <3 I've also been unboxing some merchs and other things I both manifested and bought(i revised being rich and I STILL CAN'T FULLY BELIEVE IT I MEAN YES BUT IT'S SOOOOO WNVDJSGJXH I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO DESCRIBE IT BUT I LOVE IT I MEAN MY BANK ACCOUNT IS SOOOO HUGE I MEAN I HAVE A LOT OF MONEYYYYYY AND I BOUGHT MANY MANY THINGS ALREADY 😭😭😭😭🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻 omg I can't forget to mention thisss so I have a looot of followers in this tumblr acc THIS IS SO MAGICAL ISWEAR KWMGSJSGD I also have posts from the past, posts abt BTS and others too but mostly BTS and i just remember them so clearly i could be dreaming idk I LOVE THIS😭😭😭😭😭

Also I found two pics of me and tye members together at backstages and the same day while "exploring" my new house i found out i have two frames with these photos🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻 man the fact I remember it all is what makes it all even crazier to me!! I also have this feeling like it was yesterday if u know what I mean <3

I revised showing up on specific BTS vids from Bangtantv's channel like for example BTS pop-up houses and I'm also on some concerts videos from the channel!!!!

I have two armybomb v1 and v3 and one armybomb v2 and SE(special edition), I have all albums and I said earlier 99% of them are autographed I have photos and videos of me at their fansigns and fanmeetings too I also found this P E R F E C T screenshot from when some MVS came out, including their debut mv, the screenshot was from 13 mins ago and I remember it very well as well <333

Now leaving BTS aside for a little, I also revised/manifested having my dream job and dream wardrobe too I'm so in love with my clothes and a dress in specific I just feel like using it EVERY DAY before getting into the state I saw it on Pinterest and it was like love at first sight😅🥹 ofc I remembered it when affirming for my dream wardrobe in void 🫶🏻🫶🏻

I really really wanted to share certain pics here but I prefer sending this on anonymous because I actually don't want people to find out abt this acc and find out that a random ARMY changed it all in her life🤣🤣🥲 but I swear I'm soooo on cloud 9 rnn and I have many things to unbox too well wait I'mma list other things I manifested : dream car, fluency in many languages including Korean ofc! Besides my cutie baby golden retriever i also have 2 cutie cutie kittens they're so lovely and I know they love me a lot like I love them too🥺🥺🩷🩷🩷 already said wardrobe but i also manifested a bunch of accessories and pretty shoes and especially boots too! I manifested being a good swimmer since I've always loved this sport lol(i affirmed that i can hold my breath infinitely idk if this is gonna be dangerous or idk in some way but i tested it on the same day too and yes i truly can hold my breath for a long time😳😁 i revised an account of mine being unbanned because it """had been banned"""(not anymore hehe) by some damn BTS haters but i revised that nothing of it happened and guess what?? I HAVE A POST FROM THE SAME DAY I WOKE UP IN THIS BRAND NEW LIFE!!!! I also manifested specific friends and some magical, spiritual, witchy items as well because I'm a very spiritual person and i loooove tarot cards i manifested a lot of decks and besides that i also manifested incenses, tons of crystals and pretty rocks, a caldron bcz why not lol, there's also a lot of things(not only spiritual and witchy things) that I didn't affirm when I was the void but since our higher selves always knows it damn all, I also had them when I woke up here.

There's so many things I swear I revised like 80% of my past, old life and now I literally have my dream life😭😭😭 I'm aware of skepticals who might say this is fake but I DON'T CARE LMAO VOID IS REAL MANIFESTATION IS REAL I LOVE THEM BOTH AND I DON'T GONNA PROVE MYSELF TO NOBOOOODY especially when it's a fucking skeptical person with no magic in their lives 🤣🤣🤣💅🏻💅🏻

I'm sooo happyyyy I think I'm gonna end this ask now but I may come back later(maybe, cause I'll probably sending this to different accounts who post about void success stories loll, but I'll try to come back later and give some updates if you replied to this ask!), I'll finish unboxing stuff and decorating my dream room even more, I'll also see more photos that I have in my phone from BTS concerts and other things WAAAAIT THIS IS IMPORTANT LOL i have a printer!! I can make my own photocards now loll😭😭🤣🤣 yess i swear this is important, maybe mostly for me but whateeever lol

Everyone who's also on their void state journey or such, I believe in you aaaall i know you all got this too!! Keep going, improving/increasing ur mindset and consciousness etc i know you will get all that you wish soon affff!! <3 thanks for reading this and i feel like saying that if it happens that this disappears in the future then you'll know why lol(universe making things even more truer, meaning that i didn't actually revise it all but i always had it all! AND I MEAN I ACTUALLY DOOOOO😭😭🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻) thanks and I'll go now, bye guyss!! 🥹🥹🩷🩷🩷🩷 I'll update if i can :)

Holy shit just realized how huge this ask is😭😭😭🤣🤣🤣

all of you need to see this cause this is the best success story I've gotten here

[johnnycadesmuse]

˚ ˖ 𓍢ִ໋ party 4 u

— dallas winston x reader

song 𝄞 party 4 u by charlixcx

warnings: alcohol, smoking, swearing, mentions of sex

"oh my gosh, you came!" you shouted over the music, embracing your friend as you welcomed them into your home, which only an hour earlier was empty but was now filled with bodies. "drinks are in there!" you told her, pointing to the kitchen.

you walked along side her, pouring her whatever concoction your friend had helped you make earlier that you were sure was equivalent to acid.

you told her to enjoy the party before walking off to greet others and mingle around. you rarely threw parties, if ever. but it was halloween, so you figured that you might as well— at least, that's what you told everyone who asked. you couldn't tell them the real reason, despite you knew that they knew the real reason, they just didn't wanna bring it up.

you were waiting for him. you had been waiting since the first guest came through the door, watching the entrance in hopes that you'd see him.

you hadn't invited him, hell, you hadn't invited more than half of the people that showed up. but it didn't matter, not to you. it wouldn't matter if the entire town came, or even the entire state of Oklahoma. because in that crowd, you'd only be looking for one person. you only wanted one person to be there. Dallas Winston, Dal as you called him.

he was notorious in town for being dangerous, and many always preached that no one should be within a 10 foot radius of him unless they wanna get in trouble. but you didn't listen to the warning, and you paid the price.

thing is, he was different, different from what others would say about him. he was kind, bold, even a bit chivalrous. when you were in public, he acted nonchalantly with you, wrapping an arm around your waist or kissing your neck— in private, he acted like as if you were the only person in the world. when he kissed you, he did it with so much passion that you would practically melt away. when you would have sex, it was making love, not fucking. sure, at first he was distant and cold and at times you even thought about giving up. but eventually, he warmed up and treated you like his girl, not just some chick he was hooking up with.

but one day, as you waited on the corner of your street, waiting for him to pick you up for a date for your one year anniversary, he didn't show. you tried to call, yet he didn't pick up. you thought that maybe he had gotten hurt. so, you did what any caring girlfriend would do.

as you walked into Bucks, you looked around to see Buck chatting it up with a friend near the bar. "hey Buck, is Dal here?" you asked nervously, to which he didn't say anything but instead pointed to the ceiling, signalling that he was upstairs.

you knocked on his bedroom door, hearing a faint "who is it?"

"it's me baby!" you hollered back excitedly. you could've sword you heard a groan, making your heart drop. you didn't wait for him to answer, but instead barged in to find him on his bed, smoking a cigarette with his eyes closed.

"Dal? what the hell! why didn't you pick me up?"

"what?" he asked confused, clearly having been woken up from his sleep as his eyes were squinting and his lips were somewhat chapped.

"our date?! y'know, the one i've been reminding you of for weeks straight? the one for our one year anniversary!?"

"ah, stop shouting. you're hurting my ears" he groaned, sitting up on his mattress, stumping his cigarette out on his ashtray, the one that you made him during a pottery class.

"I can't believe you" you scolded, tears burning your eyes as you looked at a man you no longer recognised.

you watched as he stared at his feet, not even looking at you once. you stood there, waiting for him to say something else. maybe an apology, or even a simple grunt would do. but nothing, you got nothing at all. it then occurred to you that Dally didn't suddenly change overnight in his sleep. something had clearly happened, and you think you knew exactly what it was.

"who is she?" you asked, your voice breaking as you were a few seconds away from breaking down.

"what?"

"who is she?!" you shouted, walking over to his dresser, throwing clothes out of his drawers in hopes of finding a pair of panties or anything that would indicate that he had been with another body that wasn't yours.

"who is who? the fuck are you doing?" he yelled back, standing up and grabbing your shoulder. you slapped his hand away before moving over to his nightstand, then his mattress, then under his bed, all the while he kept yelling at you to stop. "you ain't gonna find nothin' cus there ain't nobody else!"

"so why are you acting like a dick, huh? I mean you don't even look at me when I walk in here, you didn't come pick me up and don't say that you forgot our date because I know damn well that you didn't because every time I reminded you, you promised me that you wouldn't forget. so what! what is it? did I do something because-"

"I can't be with you anymore!" he shouted, making your heart drop down to the floor. that's when you felt the tears fall, muffled sobs coming from you as you held your face in your hands. he reached out to touch you but you quickly jumped back. "I-... it ain't you."

"yeah fucking right. cause I know damn well it ain't you, it's never you! nothing is ever your fault, is it?!" you shouted. it was true, nothing ever was his fault, at least, according to Dallas.

every time you two argued, the blame would always be pinned on you. you put up with it out of love, always attempting to justify his actions. but now, there was nothing to justify.

after that night, you never saw Dallas. he never called, you never came to Bucks anymore. whenever you saw him in public, you'd cross the street or turn the other way. you couldn't stand the sight of him, because everytime you'd see his beautiful brown eyes and handsome features, you'd desperately want to run into his arms and tell him that it was all okay. but it wasn't, and it never would be.

as you talked some more with some friends by the punch table, you heard a hollering noise over the music that sounded too familiar. one of Dally's friends, Two-Bit Matthews, was known for being loud and obnoxious. after being around him and Dally's gang, you knew his laugh all too well. and if Two-Bit was at your party, you knew he would be too.

you excused yourself, walking through the house in hopes of catching a glimpse of him somewhere. you saw Two-Bit attempting to do some sort of drink on your dining table, yet, no Dallas. maybe he didn't come you thought to yourself.

but as you turned around to go back to the kitchen, that's when you made eye contact with him.

he stood in front of you, frozen. it was as if everyone had stopped and the music had gone silent. you opened your mouth to say something, but nothing came out. he had a look on his face that was full of regret, one that told you everything that he wanted to say but couldn't.

you felt tears rush to your eyes and you turned away, ready to flee the scene. but before you could take one step, Dally grabbed your hand and pulled you through the crowd.

you were confused, but didn't let go. the rush you felt in that moment was nostalgic. it reminded you of the times that you and Dally ran from the cops, or the times that you two almost got caught having sex in the bathroom of a restaurant. you missed that rush, you missed him.

you both ended up outside in the empty backyard, Dally not letting go of your hand. you looked up at him as he looked down at you and into your eyes. he tucked a loose strand behind your ear, smirking slight, making your heart flutter.

you kissed the palm of his hand as it rested on your cheek. it took all of 2 seconds for Dally to pull you in, kissing you passionately underneath the stars of the night sky.

you didn't hear the music from the party, you didn't hear the drunk teenagers hooting and hollering from the front lawn, you just heard Dally's heartbeat as he pulled you up against his chest. he held you tightly, kissing the top of your head as he mumbled "i'm sorry" over and over. "I was so stupid. I was scared. scared that I had managed to keep someone as good as you. I thought that it ought to end soon, that you'd realise that you deserve better than me."

"no, Dallas. I want to be with you, I always have. more than anything." you whispered to him, cupping his face with your hands.

he didn't say anything, kissing you passionately once again before leading you back inside to the party that you threw for him.

@avroravia @r0seb100d @seilahdiaries

[maybankslover]

saw it coming- drew starkey

drew starkey x ex!girlfriend

drew starkey x singer!reader

warnings: kinda angst, mentions of infidelity but it doesn't actually happen, drew not being a good partner with someone else. fluff. this is all fiction.

summary: she knew she wasn't the one for him, they all saw it coming.

she knew she had known for years she wasn't the one he'd marry. maybe it was because she tries so hard to be cool, to fit in his life and family, to get along with his mom even when they both know the older woman didn't really like her.

maybe she should've been less cool, less chill maybe if she had drawn the line. if she had asked to be displayed in public not as a company, not as someone he wouldn't hug for a picture but exposed for once and for all as his girlfriend. if she asked him to not keep everyone guessing.

it was funny at the start being "secretive" and all, it was funny to read the theories but it wasn't funny anymore and the lamp was being turned off.she was quite young when they started dating, freshly twenty and he was already pushing into his late twenties.

maybe she should've known, there were all so many songs about it but he was so tall and handsome as hell. everyone and their mother would've ignored the age difference too.

almost three and a half years together when she started to ask for more.

"so i was thinking about posting this picture, can i?" she showed him a picture that showed her resting against his chest with a small bouquet of flowers in hand.

"isn't it too intimate to show? like I love it but for us." he replied and she nodded.

"no yeah you're right." he hummed and kissed her cheek. she didn't include anything about him in that photodump.

"i have a netflix event next week, want you to come with me." she watched him as he prepared to leave her house. "you free on friday?"

"is there a dress code?" he laughed.

"as if you'll ever follow them baby." she smiled at him and welcomed the kiss he pressed to her lips.

when friday came along she already knew the drill.

"what's up?" one of his cast mates hugged her. "it's been a long time since i last saw you."

"finished filming last month." the one's beside her nodded as they remembered what drew had told them.

"heard it's quite a big project." she felt so comfortable with them, they included her in pictures and gatherings.

"it's pretty cool. one of the things i've enjoyed the most to make if i'm being honest." the conversation didn't last long as the cast was called to go on stage.

the pictures the next day looked the same as always, his hands inside his pockets never touching her waist, shoulders or any part of her body.

"why can't you just hug me for a picture? everyone already knows we're together." she had every right to be as angry as she was right now.

"don't want anyone going on and about on our relationship." he shrugged his shoulders, they both knew that was a lie.

"everyone knows about us, everyone talks about us." she ironically laughed. "are you ashamed of me?"

"god no baby no." he rushed to her side and placed his hands on her cheeks. "i love you alright?"

"i love you too but sometimes you make me feel awful drew." he sighed.

"i'm sorry for that but i'm not ashamed of you." she believed the lie he told her.

he did love her in his own weird way but she sometimes made him feel embarrassed of how she acted in public.

maybe it was on his thirty-first birthday when he realised, without actually letting the thought come through, it was probably time to start settling down as if having a girlfriend for the past three years wasn't serious enough. she didn't feel the shift on him.

she should've.

she saw it coming but not in the way it unfolded. schedules, as usual, got busy this time of the year, she was doing promo and he was filming another movie and a music video.

that music video was the shift, not for her but for him. when he met the singer he would be working with it was like a light ignited inside him that said 'this is the one'.

she was so pretty, nice and genuine. there wasn't a show around her when the cameras weren't on, down to earth and extremely similar to him.

both born and raised in a big family, tons of siblings and extended family. she had just received her degree as a kinder-garden teacher when her career blew up.

that was the one for him, he knew it. such a particular thing doesn't really has an explanation on how he felt.

and she hadn't said anything because she knew he had a girlfriend of some kind but she felt it in her gut. he was the one for her too.

"hope to catch up sometime." she said, giving him a hug. "thank you for being part of this."

"it was a pleasure to work with you. maybe we'll coincide in the same city." he smiled back before they said their goodbyes.

he went back to his apartment in los angeles with a clear thought in his head. it was moment to end his three year long relationship, the girl he had been stringing along all this time and he knew he was an awful person for not releasing her sooner but she was never the one for him.

for the plans of a family he wanted to have someday. she wasn't the one he saw as the mother of his kids.

so when two days after she came back from the promo of her movie three weeks from the last time they had seen each other, he sat her down.

"what i'm going to say isn't easy and i don't expect you to be alright with it but this is how i've been feeling for a while now, this isn't working for me anymore." he sighed as he looked her eyes lose the sparkle they'd whenever she looked at him.

"what do you mean?" it was obvious what he meant.

"i want us to break up. this isn't what i want for myself anymore." he knew the conversation wouldn't end in her agreeing just because even if he wanted it to be that way.

"is there someone else or what happened in the past three weeks?" he denied with his head.

"there isn't anyone else. it's about me and what i want for my future." she scoffed.

"three years drew. three and now you realise that i'm not the future you want?" she stood up. "you can actually go fuck yourself."

"hey i'm not being mean to you." but he was being mean to her. "i know it's fucked up but it's what i feel and i'm sorry i'm hurting you because i love you even if this isn't what i want anymore."

“drew shut up.” her voice raised a bit.

he tried to say something else but she didn’t let him.

"don’t say my name. i j-just go, please leave." he sighed but followed her orders.

“I’m sorry.” he wasn’t.

they met a week later at her place to give eachother their things back.

"was there someone else?" she sighed. "at any point, was there someone else?"

"no, there wasn't. i can promise you there wasn't." at least he was honest in what he was telling her.

five months later she was still mourning what they had been. what they could've been if she hadn't been so permissive from the very start.

five months later he was having dinner with the singer from that music video, he had taken his time before going out again. didn't want to rush it, to fuck it up by starting something with someone else fresh out of his relationship.

they were playing some game that ended with them asking random questions and losing the train of how it had started.

"so old man" it made drew laugh. "you were in a relationship last time we saw each other. six months ago?"

"yeah."

"what happened?" it was normal for her to be curious, she was interested in him but wasn't interested to get herself into a threeway kind of mess.

"wasn't what i wanted for me anymore, couldn't see the future i want with her." he sighed. "she's a great woman but not the one i wanted to have a family with." he looked at his glass of wine.

"I get it." his sight shifted towards her this time. "ended my last relationship for the same reason."

"how long ago?"

"a year, we were together for two and a half i think." he nodded signaling for her to continue. "realised a bit late that he didn't really had a brain in his head and only wanted me for the ibiza nights i could get him into" her shoulders bump up for a second. "so i decided i won't ruin my life with some lowlife who would in the long run."

"different goals" he said and she agreed.

"already have my career, my success and i want more in my private life someday too, he wasn't the one to create that with."

they locked eyes without saying anything, there was like a secret moment of understatement there weren't any words to be said. their night continued, laughing and chattering as if they had known each other their whole lives. 

“so drew listen i had a great time but i don’t want to dive into anything if you aren’t over your last girl.” they stood on the front door of her house. “because i’ve been there, hung over a guy that used me to get over someone else.” 

“I get it and you don’t have to trust me because you don’t really know me but i know i’m over her.” she gave him a small smile. “I would like to keep seeing you if that’s alright with you.”

“yeah i’m alright with that.” he didn’t expect the kiss on the cheek she gave him, lingering there for a moment. “ ‘night starkey.”

“goodnight sweetheart.” he walked back towards his truck. “see you soon.”

many coffee dates in deserted places. late night drives by the beach, secret kisses in the privacy of her home and oh if it didn’t feel like love. 

‘he keeps a picture of you in his office downtown’ taylor swift’s lyrics as the background of their lazy sunday morning. drew still in bed while she stood in his kitchen making breakfast wearing the shirt he discarded on the floor when they came back from dinner last night. 

“hey pretty girl.” a sleepy smile on his face as he saw her walk inside the bedroom. 

“the toasts are a bit burned.” he chuckled. “but the rest it’s alright, I think.”

they ate in silence, the birds could be heard outside the window.

“I’m going home next friday for my mom’s birthday.” drew said placing his plate on the bedside table. 

“are you gonna drive or you’ll be taking a flight?” she didn’t think much about it they’ve been dating for almost five months only and they didn’t met the other one’s friends yet. 

“I’m gonna drive but i wanted to ask you something.” she gave him a nod. “I want you to come with me, only if you want of course.”

“isn’t really a question.” she smiled at his soft laugh. “you want me to meet your family? like for real?”

“yeah for real.” he smiled back. “I want them to meet you.” 

“I want to meet them too.”

right there they knew what it was, love, true love. 

the days before the upcoming trip she wrote three whole songs. 

“do you think i’m going too fast?” she asked her best friend on the phone. 

“nah honey i think he loves you so good it was inevitable for you to fall in love so quickly.” vic saw the glimmer in her friend’s eyes, the smile in the pictures she sent her. the look in his eyes when he looked at her in some silly video.

she was nervous to meet his family, one of his sisters was still close with his ex-girlfriend, what if they didn’t like her and they missed the girl from before?

back in new york city a brunette received a message which content broke her heart. from his younger sister.

text 

b ‘i wanted to tell you before you found out via instagram or somewhere else.”

b ‘he brought a girl home. It’s pretty serious, i’m sorry’

he took a girl home when he said he preferred to spend time alone with his family most of the times he went back home, an excuse to not bring her along. now she knew what she should’ve realised all those years back, she didn’t know how to get clean even after more than ten months later. 

his family adored her, their interaction seemed straight out of a christmas movie. 

“I hadn’t seen him so happy in ages.” his mom said in a moment they were left alone right before everyone would say their good night to go to bed. “thank you, he’s my boy again.”

“you’ve done an amazing job with drew, i’ve never had a boyfriend as amazing as he is.” the older woman involved her in a tight hug. 

“he’s never had a girlfriend as genuine as you.” it felt so real, the possibility of a future together. 

two weeks later when her family found out she had gone to north carolina to meet his family, they insisted of having a reunion to meet him. the man on the screen who was making her come back straight home to him.

“I’ve never seen him like this.” his friend madelyn said, the group of outer banks castmates watched as the couple who had reached their year anniversary, they had met her a small number of times but she had grown in all of them. 

“It’s like a light is around him everytime you see him with her.” jd added. “I’m happy for him.” 

they had managed to keep it as lowkey as possible, people were already talking about them running in the same circles but nothing about them actually being together had come out. 

“I want to play you something. I’m writing the new album.”  her music room was a big representation of who she was. the things adorning the walls, the little details on her guitars.

he loved everything about her. so he sat down on the floor, right in front of her. 

‘you are everything to me and I, I would die for you’ 

she tilted her face up a flicker of light on her cheeks. 

‘I'd give up all I have, in exchange for who I love more than anything’ 

he was trying so hard to not let a tear fall.

‘how could I never let you know? I would die for you’ 

and he failed terribly.

“Baby?” she said softly in the same way she always talked to him. 

“I love you so fucking much.” she laughed at his words. 

“I love you so fucking much more.” he pressed a firm kiss to her lips. 

maybe he had been a shitty boyfriend to someone else but she couldn’t say the same. he was the best man she had been with, he felt as a forever kind of love. 

“I want to stop hiding.” she didn’t expect him to say those words. “just want to hold your hand in public and all that romantic shit people do.” 

“I’d like that.” a fight of kisses unfolded in the instruments filled room. 

but a walk wasn’t their ‘hard lunch’ it was him posting a photo dump, the first one of them both on the backstage of his new movie. 

drewstarkey 

liked by ynln, madelyncline, danielgraig and 2.236.002 more

drewstarkey ‘life lately. pretty girl spotted’

comments have been restricted 

ynln ‘love you pretty boy’

shit blew up on twitter real fast and a girl who he had now forgotten still wondered what it was that she was missing, what the beloved singer had for him to choose her. 

“it doesn’t matter anymore, we told you for ages he didn’t love you in the same way.” one of her friends said and she knew he was right, it had only taken him a year and a half to post his new girl. 

It only took him two years to marry her. It’s true when they say a man always knows, he knew from the start she was the one for him and the forgotten girl knew from the start she was never the one. 

drewstarkey & ynln 

song beauty and the beast by celine dion and peabo bryson

liked by sabrinacarpenter, brookestarkey, taylor swift and 4.569.023 more

drewstarkey & ynln something happened… two and a half from our very first day with the very first movie we ever watched.

tale as old as time

comments have been restricted. 

If you see it coming baby, just run. It’ll never be you.

It’ll be the one who fits he’ll actually love, don’t settle for someone who won’t settle for you.

the singer and the actor had found eachother, fate working in their favor even when they felt bad karma would be coming for them it never did.

fate and soulmates can't be stopped from finding the other.

please if you liked it reblog! it helps me a lot

taglist: @droppedyourhnd @congratsloserr @rafesbabygirlx @gillybear17 @theoraekenslover @silkylovey @frankoceanluvr11 @ethanthequeefqueen

[avaredava]

Alphabet smut headcannons Choso Kamo

I've seen people do this trend a while ago so hopefully i'm not too late!

Warnings: Pure smut, fem!reader

Series

-

A = Aftercare

KING of aftercare, kisses, cuddles, food? You name it he'll do it for you. He also loves getting it back so make sure you show him the same love because he honestly so deserves it.

B = Butts or tits (what they prefer)

Tits, he loves your whole body but something about your tits has him ruttting against you. He likes giving hickeys around them, big or small he loves boob jobs, even just rubbing the tip against your nipple.

C = Cum (What it looks like)

Clear and creamy, it's so cute when he comes too.

D = Dick size and colour

He thinks it's small but it's a perfect 6 and a half inches. Very veiny and a perfect thickness to hit every sweet spot. A really pinkish red tip, especially when he cums, #c96b77, literally a perfect dick.

E = Exposed (Sexy clothes they would wear)

REALLY tight boxers, it's kinda funny seeing him limp around but he looks hot anyway.

F = Foreplay

Also the king of foreplay, kissing all over your body, licking your body and fingering you till your soaked so you can have a perfect not painful time on his dick.

G = Generous (How many orgasms would they give you)

5 or 6 in one night, otherwise he'll give as many as you need.

H = Hit (Would they hit you)

No, just no. He learned from his brother's it's not okay to hit a woman, and he stands by the rule.

I = Intimate (How intimate would they be)

VERY intimate he hates "fucking" he wants to feel your warm body not just your warm walls. He wants to see your face change with emotions, that's why he loves missionary.

J = Jostling (How much would they throw you around)

Never, he finds a position and stays.

K = Kinks

Crying, not mean or in pain, just knowing his cock made you feel so good to the point of tears? Is the best thing to him. Also breeding, just seeing plump with his cum or kids just gets him going.

L = Lick (Would they use a bunch of tongue?)

Yes, especially with foreplay. He wants you to feel his whole body even tongue.

M = Masturbating (How much would they do it or how)

All the time, especially if you don't want sex, he respects that. But that shirt just has him going and he can't hold it and he needs to jack off or something.

N = No! (What they would NOT do)

Smack, like his brother's to never hurt you. Or edge you, he doesn't like seeing you not in pleasure, he gives pleasure not take it away.

O = Oral sex

ALWAYS, he loves licking your pussy, for your pleasure or for his. He loves your taste. There's been times where he ate you out to fall asleep.

P = Public (Would like fuck in public)

No, he loves hearing you moan or him being allowed to moan. Or he doesn't want anyone to see both of you bare. If you were needy he would finger you in a lockable bathroom, not the ones with stall just one room so it's safer. And fingering doesn't require stripping either.

Q = Quick (how fast they would cum)

Super quick, and he hates condoms, he has a bit of a breeding kink like I mentioned before. He physically can't cum with a condom on. He needs to feel your warmth.

R = Ride (top or bottom)

Power bottom who is also a sub or really whiny top. No matter what he's always a bit of a sub.

S = Sultry (how slutty are they)

Kissing your legs all over until you say yes.

T = Tender (how rough are they)

VERY tender, never goes to the point you have to say your safe word.

U = Unpredictable (things you didn't know what would happen but it did)

Be crazy good at eating you out. He can eat you out and finger you amazingly at the same time it was amazing.

V = Volume (how much they cum)

Just a little since he's half a curse, but he pumps you full of his cum till he can have buckets of it.

W = Whipped (how whipped they get during sex)

Crazy whipped, he cries most of the time on how close he is to you. He never wants to pull out and sometimes he falls asleep with his cock in. Most of the time you cock warm him.

X = X - Rated (How much they moan)

Crazy moaning, not even whimpering. Full on moaning almost screaming. Multiple complaints and yellings from neighbours.

Y = Yearns (how much they want sex)

24/7 not just for your body, it's because he feels close to you.

Z = Zoom! (how fast they thrust or move)

So fast or so slow. As long as you're happy he's happy, he does whatever you want.

A/N: i went on c.ai to make a random ai give me lists of sexual words that start with a specfic letter LMAO i couldn't think of some words

[oneinnocentprincess]

"I just hate yelling at people...not that I think you are doing that! But I'm sure you are more authoritative with the council than I am...I would just hate to upset them or that they simply never gain respect for me." Eleanor attempted to explain to Oscar, even if it was fairly clear already where she was coming from. "I do not want to cause an upset."

Eleanor did roll her eyes slightly at his comment regarding how her caring was dangerous. "You do not have to lie to me." She assured him. "Caring just makes me cry." She said, gesturing to herself and her disheveled-ness.

“Well most of my life was spent in the royal palace, so many of my memories will be in there." She explained, if it were not already obvious how sheltered she had been. "I do have my favorite rooms--including my own, of course. My study felt like an extension of my room. There still was the important boring and official books, but I also kept books I enjoyed in there, both fiction and non fiction." It was nice to even just talk about it. It lifted some weight off of her, the assurance that this was not some forbidden thing she was never to speak of ever again. That she was allowed to think and talk of home.

“I do enjoy the lack of speeches.” It all was very intimate, she could understand why he preferred to eat in this sort of setting. It still was odd to her, mostly because it was simply different. What also was different was having a husband, so maybe that played into the oddness of this all. “I don’t mind banquets—up to a certain point and then I become bored out of my mind.”

“Oh no, I—we—are not doing anything like that.” Eleanor stated firmly with a shake of her head, her face going red at the thought. “I could not imagine…doing that and there are just others in the room...and the artist would have to stare and—“ She could not even bring herself to complete the thought before shuttering. “Your mentioning of the ropes sounds more appealing than that.” She stated to really drive her point.

Oscar gave her a sideways glance, the beginnings of a grin forming. “They have strong opinions because I don’t let them bore me to death,” he said, tone light but with a thread of truth beneath. “You’ll learn how to manage them. Just don’t let tradition turn into quiet obedience.” His voice dipped a little, more sincere now. He knew what the council whispered, what image they expected of her—and he wanted no part in forcing her into it.

Her honesty about taking things personally earned a small nod from him. “Good. That means you care. And that’s not a weakness, Eleanor—it’s what makes you dangerous in the best way.” He reached for his glass, then paused. “If your design opinions tarnish my legacy, then may history remember me for my impeccable taste in queens and carpets.”

She laughed then, the tension easing from her shoulders. “We’ll need a second wing just for the things you’ll bring back,” he teased, warming to her smile. “I want to see your world—not the royal halls, but the places that mattered to you.” The idea seemed to brighten her even more, her expression softening into something close to relief.

When she apologised again for interrupting dinner, he shook his head and returned to his seat beside her. “This is dinner,” he said, with a quiet smile. “Messy, honest, a little emotional. Better than any banquet I’ve sat through. And no speeches.”

Her small laugh over the tapestries sealed it—some part of her had come back to him. “They do exist,” he insisted, eyes glinting. “If history insists on remembering us, I’d rather it be for the way you looked at me just now. Or how you laugh when you’re trying not to. But if they insist on tapestries—” he leaned in, brushing her knuckles with his lips, “—I’ll make sure they get your good side.”

[leonalovesalot]

Hopin' you would come through II

ArtDonaldson x Reader

In which Art has feelings for Patrick's girlfriend.

18+ MinorsDNI (mentions of sex, but no smut)

(Gets a little angsty at the end but part 3 will have a happy ending)

wc: ~4.4k

.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._

When Art flopped on his bed to sleep later that night, his mind kept replaying your conversation. It was so incredibly embarrassing. You must hate him now, he thinks. Enough to walk out on him without a word, at least. He screwed everything up, didn't he? Not just any chance of the two of you getting together, but also his relationship with Patrick. He pictures you on the phone with Patrick telling him everything in a worried manner. And Patrick would probably say something like, "I'm gonna kick his ass."

He should have kept his mouth shut.

But on the other hand, it felt good to be free of this heavy secret. He'd had these feelings for you for a long time. Even before you and Patrick became a thing. He still remembers the day Patrick casually told him that he'd started seeing you. Art was nodding along, even though the words blurred into the background after, "dude, last night... Y/N and I ... we kinda hooked up."

Patrick proceeded to discuss, in detail, all the ways he touched you and how you liked to be kissed. Art had no choice but to listen like it wasn't making his ears bleed. And he felt like he could cry when Patrick mentioned, with pride, that he was your first kiss.

This is what he deserved though. For not making a move on you sooner. It cost him this wonderful life he could've had with you. Dinner dates, movies. laughter, kissing, fucking. All the things you now did with Patrick, could've been his.

He wasn't angry with Patrick since it wasn't his fault. Patrick was charming and had no problem relentlessly flirting with pretty girls (and guys). And you, not being given a lot of male attention in the past, were quick to fall for him.

So he couldn't be upset with anyone really. It was just about timing.

.._.._.._.._.._.._.._..

You avoided Art like your life depended on it.

Hanging out with him at the party didn't go how you expected. It was a little disappointing, you thought. On your drive back home, all you could think of was how your friendship with Art was probably ruined now. How could you recover from this? You were dating his best friend! And he was trying to get with you? His best friend's girlfriend? Who would do something like that? Really. Like, what was he expecting?

You wished he just kept his mouth shut.

You got home finally and dialled Patrick on your way in.

"Hey, baby." Patrick's groggy voice cut through your never-ending thoughts.

"Hi," you close your bedroom door. You weren't sure what to say. Which really sucked because you had been impatiently waiting for this conversation and had so many things to catch him up on. Now you couldn't remember any of it.

"'M sorry I fell asleep. I've been so sleep deprived," you hear shuffling sounds, "and I think it's catching up to me 'cause I lost a match today."

He really did sound tired. And hearing about the poor outcome of the match, you knew he needed cheering up. You did plan on telling him about Art and seeking advice on what to do. But, you didn't want to upset him further.

"You should sleep then, Pat. I don't wanna keep you up." Concern evident in your voice.

"No- no. What? No. We both planned this for today and... and it's more important than sleep." He was quick to comfort you. He was always great at that. You were quite the type A, anxiety ridden over-thinker. And Patrick was the opposite. He didn't take life too seriously and everything was easy-breezy. Being around him made you feel calmer, instantly.

"We'll keep it short then." You sit down on your bed.

"Uh uh," he shakes his head, even though you can't see. "So, how was your day? It was your last exam, right? How'd it go?"

He remembered.

"It was okay. I mean... I didn't leave anything blank, but it was harder than I thought." You play with the pink duvet.

"I'm sure you did better than you think. My smart girl." He snickers.

"Hm." You bite the inside of your cheek, unconvinced. "I also uhm- Art threw a party."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah- to uhm... to celebrate the end of the semester.” You pause. “He didn’t tell you?”

“Nope. This is the first I’m hearing of it.” Patrick sighs and you hear shuffling again. You assume he’s switching positions on his bed. “Honestly, I can’t remember the last conversation I had with Art. I guess he’s too busy for me.”

“Oh, I see.” You noticed a hint of sadness at the end of his sentence.

“The party though— tell me about it.” You open your mouth to speak but he cuts you off, “I’m surprised, actually. Parties aren’t really his scene.”

“They aren’t mine either.” You mumble.

“I know.” Patrick smiles to himself, “you two can be quite similar.”

That comment made your stomach churn. Maybe it’s time to hang up, you think. But this was how you wanted to spend the night. Listening to his sweet voice lull you to sleep. Oh God, how you missed him. You sometimes wished he wasn’t so adamant about being on tour. Instead, deciding to get a college degree and share the years of youth with you by his side. But you learned that once Patrick had made up his mind, nothing could change it.

“Y/N, you there?” He chuckles.

You snap out of your thoughts, “oh— yeah? Hm?”

“You okay? You seem a little… blue.”

Blue. Your favourite colour and your current emotion.

“I… I just,” your eyes well up suddenly and you’re not sure why, “I just miss you.”

It had been a long day. A whirlwind of emotions and now you were just so fucking tired and confused. That explains the tears.

“Aw, baby.” You picture him pouting. “I miss you too. But don’t be upset… you know I get a week off soon. I’ll come to you.”

You sniffle, “that’s not enough.”

“I know, I know. I’m sorry.”

Patrick could hear you quietly crying on the other end of the phone and it made him feel helpless. The long distance aspect of it all was a lot harder when the relationship was new to begin with. The stage where you just can’t get enough of the other person was always compromised. It sucked.

He proceeded to whisper sweet nothings into the phone and you eventually calmed down. The conversation shifted and Patrick began telling you about a tv show he started last night. You nodded and listened attentively to his words.

You wanted to be in his arms.

"Can I join you?" You blurt, "on tour- I mean."

Patrick stopped his rambling and wondered if he heard you properly.

"What?"

"I could take next semester off. It's summer anyway... lots of people don't take classes." It seemed like you had thought this through.

"I don't know what to say," Patrick was caught off guard.

"Say yes." you say under your breath.

"I- yes. Yes, of course."

.._.._.._.._.._.._.._..

Art sat alone in his astronomy lecture. He took this elective with you because you didn't share a major with him, but still wanted to take classes together. Yet, here he was, at the back of the lecture hall sweating and catching his breath, since ten minutes was not enough to make it on time from the courts.

He hadn't heard from you after the party but he wasn't surprised. He knew you probably felt awkward about the whole situation whereas Art felt guilty.

What did surprise him, though, was that you were nowhere to be seen. He swung by your dorm and even gathered the courage to knock on the door, but only your roommate was there. And she was the one who told him where you were.

Art forced a smile and turned to leave like he didn’t just get the worst news ever. You really just packed up and left to be with Patrick. He pictured you two on the road together, staying in hotels, and you cheering him on during matches. It made him so envious.

He was sad too. Because this meant that his confession to you didn’t meant anything. Or maybe you were still oblivious. So many questions and no one to answer them.

Art eventually dropped his astronomy elective. There was no point in taking it if you weren’t there. You were the one who liked space and all that stuff after all. Not him.

The summer continued to pass slowly. Painfully slowly. The heat of the sun usually made him feel alive and refreshed. He’d get out early on the courts and play until he was covered, head to toe, in sweat. But this time, it was irritating. Sweltering. Oppressive.

He was lonely. And he missed you. He didn’t pick up any of Patrick’s calls because he didn’t know how he’d react if he heard your voice in the background.

When the semester finally ended, he went home. Spent an entire week on his couch making his parents wonder if something was wrong. But when they’d raise the question, Art would shrug them off. He didn’t want to voice what he was going through because he felt pathetic. For now— and maybe forever— he’d suffer in silence.

.._.._.._.._.._.._.._..

You walk to and fro class with your head in the clouds. But, this time, the clouds are dark and cold and mucky and dumb and stupid and you're angry and annoyed and don't understand how your dreamy life suddenly turned to shit.

You don't even notice that Art was calling your name the moment he saw you leaving the lecture hall. You continued trudging down the hall so he jogs after you.

He was worried you were avoiding him. He had taken it for a whole summer. But he wouldn't let it go on any longer. He was desperate to talk to you.

"Hey!" Art called out, "Y/N! Wait up." He reaches out and grasps your left shoulder making you jolt in surprise.

You turn with wide eyes when you come face to face with him. His hair was a little longer, and falling over his eyes. He was also a little tan. It suited him.

"Oh my God. You scared me." You step back and take your earbuds out.

"Sorry," Art drops his hand stuffs them in his jacket pocket. The fall was kinder. Breeze and drizzle. It reflected his state of mind. And he feels like he could say the same for you.

You shake your head with a smile that doesn't reach your eyes, "you're good."

An uncomfortable silence settles over the two of you.

Art finally speaks up.

"You... uhm... did you do something different to your hair?"

What the fuck was that?

The frown on your face was quickly replaced with confusion.

"No... I- no. I guess it's a little longer. I don't know." You shrug.

"Cool, yeah. Looks... yeah- looks longer." He wanted to lock himself in his dorm and never come out.

Another difficult silence.

"I should—"

"How've you—"

You both pause to let the other continue. You gesture and chuckle awkwardly telling him to go on.

"How've you been?" He asks softly, "I feel like I haven't seen you in... forever."

You look down at your shoes, which used to be white, but now looked grey.

"Honestly," you meet his gaze, "not great."

His brows raise, clearly not expecting that answer. He thought it was all rainbows and sunshine with you and Patrick.

"Is everything okay?" He tilts his head, empathizing with your gloom.

"In the grand scheme of things, yes." You try to joke weakly.

Art hesitates, unsure what to say next. His eyes were studying your face closely and something was telling him you were about to cry. He didn't understand what happened, but he really wanted to. Seeing you like this hurt him deeply.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” He asks softly.

Your eyes widen slightly and he noticed their glassy appearance. Why were you hurting like this?

“Really?” You ask with round eyes that drew him in.

You thought it would be uncomfortable to discuss the issue with Art seeing as how your last conversation went. Did you imagine it or had he not inadvertently told you he liked you? But if he was so eager to see if you were okay… maybe you read things wrong. Maybe he really did just want to hang out with you alone that night. It was true that you had been paying less attention to him since you began dating Patrick.

That problem kind of solved itself though.

“Of course,” he nodded. “I… you can come by tonight. My roommate’s out for the weekend at the regatta.”

Your bottom lip began to quiver. “That sounds— thank you. I- I haven’t had anyone to talk to so I- I really need this.”

Art felt good. He was going to help you through whatever this was and he was happy that there was no resentment from your end. Since, he was trying to make a move on you last time.

“I’m free all evening. How about seven?”

“That’s perfect, Art.” You felt an overwhelming urge to hug him. But you didn’t understand how things were between you two so you just gently patted his forearm. “You’re such a good friend.”

.._.._.._.._.._.._.._..

Art sprinted back to his dorm and burst through the door, making his roommate, Nathan, fall off his chair in shock. Art panted and closed the door behind him.

“Dude, what the fuck?” His roommate recovers and gets back on his feet.

“Sorry,” Art catches his breath, “but I need you out of here.”

Perplexed, Nathan responds, “what? What’re you talking about?”

Art exhales heavily, “I need the room to myself.” He adds, “just for the evening.”

Nathan was no longer annoyed and, instead, wore a smirk, “really? Why? You got a girl comin’ over?”

Art pauses. He knew what Nathan was thinking but it wasn’t like that.

Right?

Fuck! No it wasn’t. And he can’t risk thinking that way. He’s just being a good friend to you today. That’s all he has to do. That’s all you want from him.

“Yeah… but we’re just hanging out.”

Nathan walks over to the closet and grabs an overnight bag and packs a pair of pyjamas. “Well, I’ll stay at Aiden's just incase.” He winks at Art.

“Seriously, it’s not like that.”

“Whatever, man. Don’t forget to put a sock on the door.” He laughs and walks out.

That was the last thing Art needed to think about right now.

He shakes his thoughts away and zips around the room, picking up all his things off the floor. The dorm was always a mess during the week. And on weekends, Art was too lazy to tidy up. But your coming over was a good excuse to clean. (And he totally wasn't doing it so you'd notice and compliment it because he remembered one time you mentioned that you found cleanliness attractive.)

After "cleaning" (shoving everything under his bed or stuffing things in his closet), Art stood and waited. He had too much nervous energy to relax, so he just waited for the minutes to pass.

.._.._.._.._.._.._.._..

Two soft knocks sounded at the door. Art took a deep breath and opened it. You were twiddling your thumbs and met his blue eyes when he came into view. He noticed you'd changed your clothes-- now wearing a hoodie with flared leggings. You looked cozy. He guessed these were your lounge-at-home clothes. And it was a relief you were still comfortable enough around him to wear them.

Art steps aside without a word and lets you in. He closes the door and turns to see you sitting rigidly on the edge of Nathan's twin bed.

The room felt a lot smaller now.

Art walks across the room and sits on the floor, resting his back against the side of his bed. You furrowed your eyebrows at his action, but he shot a smile your way assuring you he was fine.

"I’m… I’m all ears, Y/N” Art brings one knee up and loosely drapes his arm around it.

You chuckles softly, “I don’t even know where to begin.”

You both share a comfortable silence. Soaking in each other’s presence after so long. It felt… nice. Humans really aren’t built for isolation, you think. Being in a shitty place all alone is never the solution. We need each other.

“So, I took last semester off.” You begin.

“I know.” Art purses his lips, “I found out when I was sitting by myself in Astronomy.” He chuckles softly. He didn’t feel too bitter about it anymore. Time healed some things.

An apologetic look crosses your face, “yeah— sorry about that. It was just… spontaneous.” And I was avoiding you because I thought you were in love with me and would be upset if I left you for Patrick.

“I understand.” He grins (but he knew you were just sugarcoating the real reason).

“Yeah well… I missed him. And I thought—you know— it’s time to take matters into my own hands. So I joined him on tour.” You stare at Art as you tell the story but he could tell you were looking through him and picturing your perfect vacation. It stung.

“And— oh, Art— it was amazing. I understood why Patrick was so sure about not going to college. The… the real experience— real life— is out there.” You were speaking so passionately.

Art was starting to have a little trouble listening to you. It seems his feelings were still as strong as ever and that for the past few months he was merely under the illusion that he was slowly getting over it.

“But then,” Art’s ears perk up, “the whole dreamlike sequence ended because it was time for me to leave.”

Art nods and listens closely.

“And it got us talking about our relationship. And… and I felt selfish for wanting to keep us both in this long distance thing,” you inhale shakily. “Because it is just… so… so hard,” your voice cracks.

Art panics as your uneven breathing turns into quiet crying. He reaches for his nightstand and grabs a box of tissues. He crawls forward and hands it to you. You mumble a “thank you” and he leans back against his bedside.

“Sorry,” you sniffle and wipe your eyes and nose. “I didn’t come to just cry.” You chuckle weakly.

Art looks down at his hands trying to give you privacy. “It’s okay. Really. Take your time.”

You collect yourself and clear your throat but your voice still comes out a little hoarse. “We broke up.”

You nod like you were finally realizing that it was over between you two. “Yeah… I— we had a long talk on my last day. And it just seemed like the reasonable thing to do.”

Art sits there stunned. He couldn’t believe you two called it quits. He guessed something was wrong with your relationship because that’s why you were down. But he didn’t think you’d actually… break up. He tried his best to not let his thoughts get out of control. This was upsetting. You were in pain. And Patrick was too, probably.

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” He offers quietly sounding slightly disingenuous.

“It felt like we were putting our lives on pause all the time. Like I wasn’t a hundred percent here. And he wasn’t a hundred percent there. And that’s not fair to either of us. We can’t just be… pieces of ourselves.” You take a deep breath, “and I… I think I also began getting a little paranoid.”

Art furrows his brows, “paranoid?”

You nod slowly, “I mean… you’ve seen the way people look at Patrick. He’s magnetic.” Art nods.

You gather the courage to finally say, “when you— at your party—”

Art freezes. He can hear his heart thumping in his ears. Knowing he couldn’t avoid this conversation forever, he sits still and hears you out.

“—when you said what you said,” you dance around the topic. “I couldn’t help but think that… Patrick had probably experienced the same thing.” You wipe the corner of your right eye and avoid his gaze. “And I thought, ‘there will be a day when he wouldn’t have it in him to resist the temptation.’”

Art felt a rush of blood to every inch of his body. His face felt red and hot.

Temptation.

Had you been tempted that night?

Did you reciprocate his feelings?

Did you want to?

He stays silent as you confide in him further. Your words blur and all he hears, over and over, is temptation.

“Can you say something?” You were looking at him now. So much emotion in your eyes.

“I think you did the right thing.” Art blurts. He quickly adds, “I mean— uhm… long distance isn't for everyone. And… and maybe one day when you’re both settled, you can give it another shot.” He feels good about what he said (even though he didn’t really mean it).

“Yeah, maybe.” You say under your breath.

The room was silent other than the sounds of your breaths. You stared at the wall, deep in thought, reminiscing about your relationship. You took a full course load this semester, hoping the mountain of homework would leave no room for thoughts of Patrick. But he was a force. Even if he wasn’t on your mind, he haunted your subconscious.

"It's kind of stupid but," you inhale deeply, "I always had this- this premonition that... the first person I'd date, I'd marry." You shake your head and run a hand through your hair, feeling vulnerable. "And I think that's part of the reason why this has been so hellish."

"It's not stupid, Y/N." Art reassures you. Nothing you could want would ever be stupid.

"It is. Because it was narcissistic—like I was entitled to it." You exhale. "I actually thought it would all be so easy. Like, why would anyone ever want to break up with me?" You chuckle bitterly. "Little did I know... I'm too 'needy.'"

"Who told you that?" Art snaps his head up.

You look at him like the answer was obvious. Art was puzzled. How could Patrick say that to you? You being needy was something Art would never mind. He'd cherish it. Because it would mean you wanted him around. That you loved him. How could that ever be a problem?

Art decides to close the space between you two. He scoots closer to you and stands on his knees in front of you, almost eye-to-eye. You swallow and pick at your nails in your lap.

"You're not needy. If anything, Patrick was so detached he couldn’t even see that your wants and expectations were completely normal."

You paused your busy hands and rested them on your thighs. They were sweaty. This felt good. Even though a part of you had a feeling he was just saying this to comfort you. The other part felt warmth and seen. So you weren't a burden. That's all you needed to hear. You were so fucking grateful for Art.

You stared at him with misty eyes. They weren’t exactly tears of sadness. Or—at least, not only sadness. There had been a storm knocking down everything inside you for the past few weeks, and for the first time you felt a ray of light peaking through the monstrous clouds.

Art noticed your eyes welling up, but there was something else in them too—something he wished he could bottle up and drink every day. It looked like you were realizing, maybe for the first time, that he cared about you just as much as—if not more than—Patrick ever did.

There was already a small distance between you. But it still felt like you were a lightyear away. Without realizing it, Art began leaning closer. His hands came to rest on either side of you, gripping the edge of the bed, quietly trapping you between them.

So pretty up close.

You were too lost in your thoughts to notice what was happening. So when you felt a soft sensation press against your lips, your eyes widened and you were immediately snapped out of your daze.

Art felt you freeze up and knew you'd pull away any second. But this was like a dream come to life. So for the few milliseconds your lips were touching, he let himself soak in every bit of it.

It happened so fast he questioned if it happened at all.

You were standing up and heading to the door to leave, while he was slouched on the floor with his lips buzzing with your trace.

Art quickly gets up and reaches out to hold your wrist, desperate to keep you here. The last thing he wanted was to scare you off. And he knew he'd gone too far but he didn't know if he'd ever get the opportunity again.

"You're unbelievable." The tear tracks on your face glistened in the soft luminescence of the streetlight peering into the room.

"I—fuck—I'm sorry. I was just—" he stammered, panicking.

"How could you possibly think that was okay?"

You were staring at him with so much contempt he almost didn't recognize you.

"Y/N, I just wanted to make you feel better," he said quickly. "You're hurting."

"No—no, Art. That’s not true. You’re just selfish. You’re—yeah—that’s what you are."

"I’m selfish?" he asked, offended.

You nodded.

"I'm not the one who packed up and left everything behind. You left me like I meant nothing to you." He chokes out, "you didn't think I deserved an explanation? Why? Because you didn't want to have that uncomfortable conversation with me? I'd say that's pretty fucking selfish." He looked away and huffed as his own eyes began to water. "I'd do anything for you. And you wouldn't even bat an eye."

"I never asked for any of this." You sniffle. "And if me not reciprocating your feelings makes you resent me, then... I don't think we can even be friends anymore.

"Fine."

"Fine."

.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._.._

failed an entrance exam and wrote this to distract myself

i hope it's not too all over the place

thank you for your patience and for reading <33

[whaleiumsharkspeare]

*Spoilers for the new How to Train Your Dragon, read at your own risk*

Which okay yes I know how everyone feels about live action remakes. Believe me, I feel the same way. But my sister is a huge HTTYD fan and wanted to see it so we went together. Here is my review:

Overall, this is literally the same movie. Practically shot for shot. I mean the dialogue was the same, the camera angles were the same, the music was the same. It was like 90% How to Train Your Dragon (2010). Didn’t add much, didn’t subtract much, but there were a few differences.

The biggest one, I would say, is that the chief of the tribe is apparently not a dynastic position. There are a couple characters who mention something about wanting to be chief someday, which I think was just inherited originally. Astrid especially is vying to be chief, which is even brought up by Hiccup when he mentions how Stoick would probably be proud to have Astrid as his successor since she’s everything that Hiccup isn’t. Also, in the original, the Viking teens dislike Hiccup because he’s puny and awkward and just Not Like Them, and in this version that’s part of it, but the main reason they don’t like him is essentially because he’s a nepo baby. They point out Hiccup’s privilege as the chief’s son, mentioning how he doesn’t have to work as hard as them, or how if he was anyone else’s son, he would’ve been exiled from Berk by then, but because he’s the chief’s son he gets to stay no matter how many messes he causes, and that he wouldn’t have made it to dragon training without Stoick “pulling some strings”. When Hiccup starts to be the star pupil because of the stuff he’s learning from Toothless, they do level off on this and start clamoring to be his friend just like in the original.

Another pretty key difference is that they cut the scene after Test Drive where Hiccup and Toothless are chilling eating fish and the group of Terrible Terrors flies in and Hiccup feeds them. I don’t know why they cut this scene because it’s pretty important. It’s the scene that establishes the Chekhov’s gun of how dragons aren’t fireproof on the inside. This is a really important detail for Hiccup to learn because it’s how he defeats the Green Death. It also includes the important line “everything we know about you guys is wrong”, which isn’t said here, but Hiccup does remark to Astrid during the scene where they’re reading the dragon training manual something like “maybe we’re wrong about them”, which I suppose is pretty similar. But the not fireproof on the inside thing is pretty important. Hiccup does defeat the Green Death in the exact same way, by having Toothless ignite its fire breath first, but there wasn’t a scene where Hiccup learned that dragons can be defeated that way, so that knowledge just kinda seems to come out of nowhere.

Also, when Hiccup discovers Toothless shot down in the woods and can’t bring himself to kill him, he doesn’t say “I did this” with regret. This means that Stoick also doesn’t say “I did this” when he thinks Hiccup is dead, so we don’t get that bookend of the father and son being the same in that instance. Also, when Stoick apologizes to Toothless, there is like a whole minute of dramatic tension before Toothless opens his wings to reveal that Hiccup is alive, when in the original he opened his wings right after Stoick apologized. But I’m glad to say that they did keep the really important shot at the end where Toothless and Hiccup have matching injuries requiring prosthetics. That was a good detail.

This is the only detail of the movie that I actually do think is weird and kind of unnecessary, and that’s the character of Snotlout. Idk why, but in this version, he’s basically the MCU’s version of Flash Thompson. Like instead of being a physically imposing bully, he’s just kind of a show off. He is bigger than Hiccup, but he doesn’t seem “tough”. And much like the MCU Flash, he has this weird relationship with his dad?? Like there are a surprising number of scenes where he tries to impress his dad and his dad completely brushes him off and barely acknowledges his existence, and he even tells Snotlout not to speak to him in public. It was giving Flash at the end of Spider-Man: Far From Home when he gets back to New York to find that his butler/chauffeur came to pick him up but not his parents. Like that exact same vibe. It really didn’t add anything to the movie except to make you feel sympathy towards Snotlout I guess but it honestly wasn’t needed and I thought it was weird. (Full disclosure though, I haven’t seen any of the httyd tv shows so I have no idea how Snotlout’s character is expanded in the franchise, so it’s possible that I just don’t understand the full extent of his character)

Pretty much everything else about the movie is the same as the animated one, and I do mean pretty much everything. Hiccup is his normal awkward self, Astrid is a Cool Girl, Gobber suggests putting Hiccup in dragon training, Fishlegs is a dragon nerd, the twins pick on each other, Stoick and Hiccup’s Viking helmets are halves of Valka’s breastplate, all the same dragon species are mentioned, Hiccup is left-handed, and he even eats the bit of fish that Toothless coughs up.

So since the movie is like 90% the original movie, that means that it’s good, or at least mostly good. There’s nothing offensive about it, very little added, very little subtracted. Being live action it obviously doesn’t have the same visuals or ability to do things that you can only do in animation, but they really do try their best to copy like, all of the important shots. If you love How to Train Your Dragon you’ll probably be okay with it since it’s like basically the same movie, but of course it’s hard to beat the magic of the original. But as far as live action remakes go, since it kept pretty much everything, that means that it’s generally very faithful.

Oh but the part at the end where Hiccup decides to leave Toothless behind so he can go to college in Norway to study aviation (even though he already lives in the dragon flying capital of the world) was pretty weird, idk why they did that