#then got possessed or something because when I came to myself after 3 hours this was in front of me last night

[mugmegan]

Evil protagonist or something

[harknessxo]

Paring: Serial-killer!Stalker!Agatha Harkness x reader

Summary: Agatha finally has you to herself but things get a little bit complicated.

Warnings; kidnapping, knife kink, blood kink, mommy kink, dub-con, fingering, strap on use, bondage, choking, Stockholm Syndrome.

Word Count: 5.3k

Part 1, Part 3

A/n: Here’s part 2!!

After many hours you finally started to stir awake. When you opened your eyes a sudden rush of pain striked through your head. You held your head, closing your eyes again trying to lessen the pain. Once the pain had calmed down you opened your eyes again and found yourself on a bed that wasn’t yours. You frowned, confused on where you were and right then the memories of the night before came back to you.

You slowly sat up in bed, your head still throbbing from the pain. You looked around the room, trying to make sense of your surroundings. It was a dimly lit room with a few pieces of furniture scattered about. You were alone, but you knew that Agatha was somewhere nearby. You got out of bed, your legs feeling weak and unsteady. You tried to remember what had happened, but the memories were hazy. As you tried to walk closer to a window to look outside, you felt a cold piece of metal wrapped around your ankle. You looked down to find a shackle on your ankle, making your heart drop.

“I know. It isn’t exactly what I wanted but I couldn’t have you running away from me,” a voice said from behind you. You slowly turned to find Agatha leaning against the room door.

“What- Where am i?” Your voice trembled.

“You’re home. And don’t worry, no one can hear you here. I made sure of it,” she said, taking a step closer to you.

“The police will be looking for me as well as you,” you stepped back and far as the shackle allowed you.

“Oh sweetheart, I’m always three steps ahead of them. No one will find you here. And even if they did, they wouldn’t be able to take you away from me. You’re mine now.” She said, her voice firm and possessive. She took another step closer to you, closing the distance between you two, making you flinch.

“Why…” you swallowed the lump in your throat, “Why did you kill Wanda?”

“Because she was trying to steal you from me,” she said, her voice dripping with venom, “She was so goddamn clingy to you, acting like you belonged to her. It drove me crazy and the thought of her having you for herself was something I just couldn’t allow.”

“She was my best friend!” You shoved her off out of anger, tears running down your face. She stumbled back slightly, a look of surprise crossing her face before her expression turned to anger.

“She wasn’t good enough for you! No one is good enough for you! Only I am good enough to have you!” She raised her hand and grabbed your chin tightly, forcing you to look at her.

“Ah!” you groaned, her grip on your chin painful.

“You need to understand, sweetheart. You belong to me and only me. I’ll carve my name on your chest with the knife I used to kill Wanda if necessary. I won’t let anyone take you away from me, not even your precious little ‘best friend’. I did what I had to do to keep you safe and with me.” She said, her voice low and menacing.

“You’re fucking insane!”

“I’m not insane, I’m just a woman who knows what she wants and will do anything to get it. And what I want is you. So you better get used to being mine, because you’re not going anywhere.” She said, her grip on your chin tightening even more.

“You’re hurting me!” you gripped onto her wrist. She let go of your chin and grabbed your wrists, pinning them above your head.

“And you’re being a bad girl. I told you to behave.” She said, her eyes narrowing at you.

“Why did you kill all those women?” You suddenly asked.

“I killed them because they looked like someone who did me wrong in the past. I knew it was wrong to kill all those women but I just couldn’t help myself. I needed someone to take my anger out on. You were actually going to be one of my many victims,” she leaned closer, her breath warm against your skin, “But I didn’t expect to actually develop a real fascination with you.”

“Are you gonna kill me now?”

“I was but I couldn’t just kill you. You’re special. You’re different from the others.” She said, her voice softening slightly as she looked at you. You let her press her cold lips against your neck as you tried to process everything. She kissed and nibbled on your neck, her lips trailing up to your ear.

“You're finally mine. You could be my wife.” She whispered, her breath sending shivers down your spine.

“Your wife?” You mumbled.

“Yes, my wife. I want you to be mine in every way possible. I want to claim you as mine and only mine. I want to make you mine in every way a man and a woman can.” She said, her voice low and possessive. She pulled away from your neck and looked at you with a hungry look in her eyes.

“Agatha?”

“Yes, sweetheart?” She said, her voice soft as she looked at you with an intense gaze.

“Please let me go-”

She shook her head in disappointment, roughly letting go of your wrist and stepping away from you in frustration. You began to sob, sliding down the wall until you were sitting on the floor, hugging your legs. She let out a deep sigh and knelt down in front of you, her expression now softer.

“You’re so pretty when you cry,” she moved her hand closer to your face. You closed your eyes tightly as she moved her hand to wipe a tear away.

“Agatha, I’m scared.”

“I know you are, sweet girl. But you don’t have to be scared. I won’t hurt you, I promise.” She said, her voice gentle as she cupped your face in her hands and gently wiped away your tears.

“Please I won’t tell anyone-” she laughed at your empty promise.

“Now we both know that’s not true. It hurts that you would lie to me. You’re a smart girl, you’ll tell the police and they’ll come after me. And I can’t have that.” She said, her tone becoming serious again.

“You can’t keep me here forever!”

“Oh, but I can. And I will. I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you here with me. Even if it means keeping you locked up forever until you learn to love me.”

“Love you?” you stood up, “You killed my best friend! I hate you!” Without thinking, you took the closest thing to you and threw it at her. The object hit her square in the chest, knocking her back slightly. She stumbled backwards with a masochistic look on her face.

Your eyes widen when you realize what you did. You were about to apologize but she tackled you on the bed, holding you down, making you scream bloody murder. She straddled your hips and grabbed your wrists, pinning them down on either side of your head and pulled her pocket knife, pressing it against your throat. She looked down at you with a dangerous glint in her eyes.

“Now, now. Is that any way to treat me? That wasn’t very nice…”

“I’m- I’m sorry…” you stuttered out, scared of what she would do next with the knife in her hands. She leaned down and pressed her body against yours, her breath hot against your ear.

“That’s a good girl. You need to learn some manners. No throwing things at me or trying to attack me. Understand?”

“I…I understand.” She smirked and nipped at your earlobe, her grip on your wrists loosening slightly. She trailed the tip of the knife down your throat to your collarbone.

“What are you gonna do to me?” You asked, not knowing if you actually wanted the answer. She chuckled and ran the knife down to your chest, the cold metal sending shivers down your spine.

“Oh, I have so many things in mind, darling. I could hurt you. I could punish you. I could make you mine in ways you never thought possible.”

“You s-said you wouldn’t hurt me-”

“I changed my mind.” You inhaled, holding your breath as she ripped through your shirt with the knife, clenching your eyes tightly. She cut through your shirt, revealing your bare chest. She traced the knife along your skin, admiring your body.

“You’re so beautiful. I can’t wait to mark you as mine.” She pressed the cold metal tip against your nipples, making you whimper. She smirked and watched your reaction with intense fascination. She ran the blade gently over your nipples, enjoying the way they hardened under her touch.

“Does that feel good, darling? The cold metal against your sensitive skin?” You didn’t respond, too focused on your breathing, fearing any movement would cause her to nick you. She chuckled in amusement and leaned down, her breath hot against your skin. She gently nipped at your neck, her teeth grazing your skin.

“You’re being so quiet. I like it when you make noise. I want to hear you scream my name.”

“I…” You felt breathless. She pulled back and looked at you with a smirk, the knife still pressed against your skin.

“Go on, say it. Say my name.”

“No.” You refused. Her expression darkened and she pressed the knife harder against your skin, just enough to draw a little bit of blood.

“You’re so bratty. Say it. Now.” She demanded.

“Ah! Agatha!” You cried out in pain. She smiled at your agony, satisfied with your response.

“Good girl. See? That wasn’t so hard, was it?” She leaned down and licked the blood from your skin, her tongue tracing the cut.

“It hurts-” You moaned in pain as she licked over the cut. She smirked at your moan, enjoying the sound of your pain. She continued to lick and kiss the cut, her tongue moving up to your neck.

“You taste so good, darling. I could get addicted to this.” She looked at you, wiping some blood from her lip with her thumb.

“Please…” You begged, not knowing what for. Her gaze darkened again as she looked at you with a hungry look in her eyes.

“I love to hear you beg,” she pressed the bloody tip of the knife on your collarbone, “Say it again.”

“Please, Agatha.” Her eyes gleamed with satisfaction as she continued to trace the knife down your chest, leaving a trail of blood in its wake.

“That’s better. You’re learning. But I want more. I want you to beg for me to touch you. Beg for me to make you feel good.” You closed your eyes tightly, tears running down your cheeks. You didn’t want to please her but deep down you actually did. During the time you spent together you had managed to feel something for her.

“Please touch me, Agatha.”

“As you wish,” she licked your tears before kissing down your body, putting the knife next to you on the bed. Her grip on your wrist had loosened and you took the opportunity to free yourself and take the knife. You pushed her off and stood up, shakily pointing the knife at her while covering your breast with your other arm.

Agatha stumbled backwards, a bit surprised by your sudden action. She held her hands up in a gesture of surrender, but her expression was of amusement.

“Well, well, well. Look who’s being feisty now.”

“Let me go.” You said trying to sound confident. She chuckled at your failed attempt and took a step closer to you, unfazed by the knife pointed at her.

“You’re so cute when you try to be tough. But we both know that’s not going to happen.”

“Don’t take a step closer!” You wielded the knife at her. She raised an eyebrow, amused by your warning. She took another step closer, her eyes locked on yours.

“Or what? You’re going to stab me?” she laughed, “Just give me the knife before you hurt yourself badly.”

“No-“ You were cut off by her taking the knife from your hand, bending your arm behind your back and bending you over the edge of the bed.

“Now, now. I thought we had an understanding. You were doing so good…” she fake pouted, taking off her belt and tying both your arms behind your back.

“I’m sorry! Please don’t hurt me!” You sobbed. She chuckled, making sure your wrists were tightly secured.

“Oh, I won’t hurt you. At least not in the way you think. But you need to learn to behave, hon. And I think I know just how to teach you.” She started pulling your pants down.

“No!” you squirmed against her, “Please!” She held you down firmly, not letting you move.

“Shh, just stay still for me.” She finished pulling down your pants and ran her hand over your exposed skin. Her hands against your skin made your body tremble. She smiled as she felt you tremble beneath her touch. She ran her hands up and down your thighs, her touch light and teasing.

“You’re so sensitive, angel. I can feel you trembling under my hands. Do you like it when I touch you like this?” She whispered into your ear, her body flushed against yours.

“N-no-”

“Liar,” she chuckled, slowly trailing the knife from your waist to the band of your panties, “Your body betrays you, my dear. I can see how much you’re enjoying this. The way your skin flushes, the way your breath hitches. You’re trying to deny it, but deep down you want this,” she snapped the string of your panties, making the fabric fall down your legs. Your breath hitched when the cold air hit your dripping core, making you shiver slightly. She smirked as she saw your reaction, noticing the wetness between your legs.

“Would you look at that. You’re already so wet for me. I haven’t even touched you properly yet.” She ran her finger along your folds, teasing you. You buried your face into the mattress, ashamed of how your body was betraying you. She chuckled and leaned down, her breath hot against your ear.

“Don’t hide your face, sweet girl. I want to see you. I want to see the look on your face as I touch you. You can’t hide how much you want this.” She continued to tease your folds, slowly circling your clit.

“Hmph…”

“Come on, baby. Don’t be so stubborn. Just admit that you want this. That you want me to make you feel good.” She increased the pressure on your clit, rubbing it in slow circles.

“I…I want you to make me feel good.” You finally gave in. She smiled, satisfied, finally winning your body over.

“That’s a good girl. I just want to make you feel good, angel,” She continued to rub your clit, her other hand gently caressing your thigh, “Tell me how it feels. Tell me how much you want me to touch you.”

“F-fuck Agatha!” She almost moaned when she heard you moan her name, her fingers moving faster inside you.

“That’s it, baby. You’re doing so good.” You felt yourself getting closer to the edge, your nails digging into your palms as you tried to even out your breathing. She felt your walls clenching around her fingers letting her know you were getting closer. She leaned down, her lips against your ear again

“Are you gonna cum, already?” She teased as you gasped for air, “Let go. I want to feel you come undone around my fingers,” she curled her fingers inside you, hitting your g-spot ever so perfectly. You came almost instantly, your juices gushing out into her fingers, your vision going white. She watched as you came, a satisfied smile on her face. She continued to pump her fingers in and out of you, helping you ride out your orgasm.

“There we go. Such a good girl,” she praised, slowly pulling her fingers out of you. You whined when she pulled her fingers out, suddenly feeling empty. She chuckled at your whine, bringing her fingers to her mouth and licking them clean.

“Don’t worry, baby. I’ll fill you up again soon. Now I’m going to untie you and you’re not going to do anything stupid, isn’t that right, sweet girl?” You nodded your head, too tried to say anything. She smiled and untied the belt that was holding you in place, letting it fall to the floor. She gently rubbed your wrists, massaging the red marks that the belt left behind.

“So obedient,” she pulled your head back by your hair, “How good was it?”

“So g-good-” you mumbled pathetically. She kissed your cheek and loosened her grip on your hair, letting you rest your head on the bed.

“I know, baby. You were so good for me. I’m going to give you a reward.” She took off the shackle around your ankle before flipping you into your back. You let her treat you like her doll as she positioned your body however she pleased. She smiled as she looked down at you, admiring your body. She spread your legs apart and knelt between them, her hands on your thighs.

“You’re so beautiful like this. Spread out for me, completely at my mercy,” her hands moved up to cup your breast, “I’m going to fill you up nice and full just you wait,” she started to get up, “Now stay still and look pretty.” She moved away from you and walked over to her dresser, opening the top drawer and rummaging through it. After a moment, she pulled out a strap-on.

“What’s that?” You asked, your vision a bit blurry. She held up the strap-on, biting her lip.

“It’s a little gift for you, angel. Something to fill you up and make you feel even better than my fingers did.” She slowly took off her clothes as if to give you a show. You could only stare, mesmerized by her beautiful toned body. She could see the look of awe on your face as you watched her undress, a shit eating grin still on her face. She strapped the strap-on around her hips and walked back over to the bed, standing over you.

“You like what you see, sweetheart?”

“Mhm…” you hummed and she leaned down, her face inches away from yours.

“You’re being awfully quiet. Where did that bratty mouth go?” You flushed, embarrassed.

“Oh, don’t be embarrassed. I love it when you’re feisty. It’s so much more fun to break you.” She chuckled, her eyes roaming over your body. She picked up a fluffy pillow and placed it under your hips.

“Are you comfortable, sweet girl?”

“Yes.

“See?,” she said, positioning herself between your legs, “If you behave, mommy can be nice,” She ran her hand along the strap-on, coating it with your juices.

“Mommy? How did you-” She chuckled and placed her hand on your thigh, rubbing small circles with her thumb.

“Oh, baby, I know everything about you and you’re so perfect.” You tried to say something but she quickly shushed you.

“Shh, don’t you want mommy to fill you up?” She moved her hips forward, the strap-on pressing against your entrance. You were quickly to nod your head.

“That’s my girl,” she put your legs over her shoulders, “I want you to keep your eyes open for me, okay? I wanna see you fall apart.” You obeyed her order, keeping your eyes on her as she slipped the strap inside you. It felt like heaven as she entered into you, your mouth open with a silent moan. Agatha nearly came by the mere sight of your greedy cunt eating her strap.

She let out a low moan as she watched the strap disappear into you, the base pressing against her clit ever so perfectly.

“God, you’re so perfect. You’re taking me so well, baby girl.”

“Mommy!” You moaned out. She groaned at the sound of you calling her that, her grip on your thighs tightening.

“Say it again,” she said, slowly pulling the strap out and thrusting it back in.

“Mommy…” She started to pick up the pace, her hips snapping against yours with each thrust. She leaned forward, her body pressing against yours.

“Good girl, you’re doing so good for mommy. You’re such a good little slut,” she wrapped her hand firmly around your neck making you feel like you were in cloud 9. The only sounds heard in the room were of your skin slapping and the wet noise your pussy was making. Agatha looked down at where your bodies connected and noticed the belly bulge that formed every time she thrust inside you. She let out a low moan at the sight of the bulge, her hand squeezing your neck ever so slightly.

“You feel that, angel?” she moved your hand down to your tummy, “That’s how deep in your guts mommy is.”

“M-mommy-” you whined.

“What is it baby?” she thrusted her hips roughly, “is it too much?”

“Yes- too- too much,” you gasped out, wrapping your hand around her wrist. Agatha smiled, not relenting on her brutal pace.

“Do you want me to stop?” She tightened her grip around your neck, squeezing harder. When you didn’t reply she laughed.

“You’re so greedy. You want mommy to keep using you like this, don’t you? You like when mommy is rough?”

“Please mommy?” You pleaded and she leaned down, her lips brushing against your ear.

“Please what, baby? Use your words.”

“Harder-” She chuckled darkly, her hips slamming into you harder than before.

“Is that better, angel?”

“Fuck- yes!”

“Such a dirty mouth,” she nipped at your earlobe, “Maybe I should punish you for that.”

“No, no, no- I'm sorry. Please don’t stop.” You begged desperately.

“I wasn’t going to stop anyway.” She chuckled darkly, keeping her torturous pace. Her other hand kept rubbing your clit and soon you came on her strap. She slowed her pace as you came, her hand still on your clit. She watched your face as you came undone, her own arousal growing.

“That’s it, baby girl. Let go for mommy.” Her thrust became sloppy and she chased her climax. She was getting close, her hips grinding against yours. She was so focused on her own pleasure that she didn’t care to notice how overstimulated you were. You squirmed and whine under her, your legs shaking from the overstimulation. She grabbed your wrists and pinned them above your head, holding you down.

“Be still, baby. I’m almost there.”

“But-”

“No buts. I’m gonna use you until I cum, and you’re going to take it.” She growled, her grip on your wrists tightening. The base of the strap kept rubbing against her clit until she finally came and in the process making you come a third time. She let out a loud moan as she came, her hips stilling against yours. She panted heavily, trying to catch her breath as she rode out her orgasm.

“Fuck, baby. Did you come again, sweet girl?” She panted out.

“Yes, mommy…” you muttered out. She let go of your wrists and slowly pulled out of you, watching as her strap came out.

“Good girl,” she laid down beside you, her hand running through your hair, “You took me so well,” she patted your pussy, chuckling when you clenched your thighs together.

“Sensitive, aren’t you?” her hand resting on your thigh.

“Mhm..” you buried your face into the valley of her neck. She chuckled and wrapped her arms around you, pulling you close.

“Poor baby, too sensitive to even speak.”

Suddenly there was a noise of someone bursting through the door of the house. Agatha was the first to get up.

“Mommy? What was that?” You asked a bit scared.

“They are here to take me, baby.” She explained while getting dressed.

“Take you? No! I don’t want them to take you!” You said desperately.

“I know, sweet girl,” she kissed your forehead while handing you a shirt, “Put this on for me.” Just as you finished putting the shirt on a S.W.A.T. team barged into the room, screaming at Agatha to show her hands and get on her knees.

“No!” You screamed, trying to get to her but one of the officers held you back, “Let me go! Aggie!”

“Shh,” she shushed you as they roughly put her in cuffs, “Everything is going to be okay.”

“I don’t want you to go away!” You sobbed, punching the officer’s chest.

“Calm down.” The officer ordered as he tightened his grip on you, struggling to keep you from hitting him. You managed to free yourself from his hold and ran towards Agatha, clinging to her for dear life. She was moved away from you, and the cops held her back from you.

“It’ll be okay, I promise.” She managed to say to you as she was being pulled away. You fell to your knees, crying as they took her away. She was forced out of the room, the last thing you saw of her was her being dragged away by the police.

The officers allowed you to get dressed before taking you to the station so they could ask you questions about Agatha. You sat in the interrogation room, waiting for someone to come in and ask you questions. The room was cold and uncomfortable, making you shiver. After about ten minutes the detective that had been on the case of the Angel of Death finally came into the room. Tyler Hayward. He sat down across from you, his gaze stern and cold.

“So you’re the latest victim of the Angel of Death.” He stated bluntly.

“I’m not her victim.” You said firmly. He raised an eyebrow at your statement.

“Oh really? Then why were you with her? Were you her accomplice?”

“No. Of course not-“ He cut you off as he leaned forward, resting his arms on the table.

“Then why were you there with her? What’s your relationship with her?”

“…she kidnapped me.”

“She kidnapped you? And you didn’t try to escape?”

“She did it to protect me-”

“Protect you? How exactly does kidnapping you protect you?” He scoffed, clearly not believing you.

“Because she loves me.”

“Love?” he laughed, “She’s a serial killer. How can you be so sure that she loves you? She killed your best friend-”

“She did it for me! For us!” She slammed your hands on the table. He looked at you, unfazed by your sudden outburst.

“Us? What do you mean ‘us’?”

“So me and her could live together in peace.” He shook his head.

“You’re delusional. You can’t honestly believe that a psychopath like her would want to live a peaceful life with you.” He shook his head.

“Don’t call her that.” You said angrily.

“And why is that? That’s exactly what she is. A cold-blooded killer who has no regard for human life.”

“Stop it!”

”You need to realize that you’re in denial. She doesn’t love you, she just wants to use you for her own sick pleasure.”

“You’re lying! She wouldn’t do that!” He slammed his hands on the table, causing you to flinch.

“Open your eyes! She’s manipulating you. She’s a master manipulator and you’re just another one of her victims.”

“Screw you, Hayward! I want to go home!”

“You can’t go home. You’re under police custody until we figure out what the hell is going on.”

“Then I want to see Agatha.”

“No can do. She’s not allowed to have visitors.”

“I won’t say another word.”

“Fine, have it your way,” he stood up and walked toward the door, “Your friend, Monica is here to see you.”

“Monica?” You asked with a hopeful voice. He nodded, opening the door and motioning for Monica to come in. She came in running towards you, giving you a big hug.

“I’m so glad you’re okay, Y/n. I was so scared when I went to your house and didn’t find you there.”

“I’m okay, Monica.” you pulled away, smiling at her.

“Did she do something to you?” She sat down next to you, holding your hand.

“What?” you frowned, “No. She would never hurt me.” She looked at you with a worried expression.

“Y/n, she killed Wanda-“

“So what?” You stood up angrily. She looked taken aback by your sudden outburst.

“So what? She’s a killer, Y/n! She doesn’t deserve to live!”

“No! She loves me!” Monica stood up as well, her voice growing more desperate.

“You can’t seriously believe that! She’s just using you, can’t you see that? She doesn’t care about you, she only cares about herself!”

“What would she even use me for?!”

“I don’t know, maybe she wants you to help her kill more people or something. She’s a psychopath, Y/n. She doesn’t think like we do.”

“Don’t call her that!”

“Why do you keep defending her? Can’t you see that she’s dangerous?”

“Not to me.” You said simply.

“God, she has you brainwashed…” Monica shook her head.

“No she doesn’t!”

“Okay,” she said simply, “I have to go. I’ll see you when they finally let you go.” You frowned again at her sudden change of demeanor but nodded either way. Monica gave you one last hug before leaving the room, leaving you alone with your thoughts. Hayward was still watching you from the other side of the room, his expression unreadable.

They left you in the room for hours. You were starting to lose your mind, banging at the door begging for them to let you see Agatha.

“Please! I just want to see her one last time!” You cried out while dropping to your knees in front of the door, defeated. A few seconds later they finally opened the door and you scrambled to your feet.

“You get eight minutes with her.” Hayward said, irritated. He led you into another interrogation room where they were keeping Agatha. When they opened the door and you nearly tackled her to the floor with a hug. Hayward took the opportunity to leave the room, locking the door behind him. Agatha stumbled back slightly from the force of your hug but quickly wrapped her arms around you in return. She held you tightly, her grip almost desperate.

“Oh my sweet girl. Are you alright? Did they hurt you?”

“No, mommy, I’m okay. They are trying to make me hate you and I don’t like it.” She pulled away slightly to look at you, her expression a mixture of relief and anger.

“Those bastards. They’re trying to turn you against me. Don’t listen to them, baby. They don’t know what they’re talking about.”

“I don’t want them to take you away from me.” You sobbed as she held you tighter, rubbing your back soothingly.

“Shhh, shhh. They won’t take me away from you, baby. I promise. Look at me.” She pulled away and held your chin up.

“I’m not going anywhere. You’re mine remember?,” she leaned closer to your ear, “Take this,” she whispered, handing you a brooch you’ve seen her wear all the time, “Keep this safe for me, okay? Act like nothing happened and I will find you, how does that sound?”

“For how long?” You whined.

“A week a at most-”

“A week?”

“I need you to be patient, sweet girl,” she chuckled , brushing a hair out of your face, “Don’t you want to live with me forever?” You looked down at the brooch before pulling Agatha into a kiss. She returned the kiss, her hands gripping your hips as she deepened it. She pulled away reluctantly after a few moments, resting her forehead against yours.

“Remember, just act normal and be patient-”

“Times up!” an officer interrupted, “Let’s go Y/n. You can go home now.” You looked back at Agatha, giving her one last kiss before you were dragged out.

Taglist; @polaris-likethestar @wandasreallover @oh-no-bummer @phixiesworld @eliscannotdance @venomhimbo @aka-patsy @scoliobean @chlondykebar @p-taryn-dactyl

[dailytogachako]

So I found this around, can I ask for Toga/Ochako?

♥ Send a ship and I'll give you who:

- Gives nose/forehead kisses

- Gets jealous the most

- Picks the other up from the bar when they’re too drunk to drive

- Takes care of on sick days

- Drags the other person out into the water on beach day

- Gives unprompted massages

- Drives/rides shotgun

- Brings the other lunch at work

- Has the better parental relationship

- Tries to start role-playing in bed

- Embarrassingly drunk dancer

- Still cries watching Titanic

- Firmly believes in couples costumes

- Breaks the expensive gift rule during Christmas

- Makes the other eat breakfast

- Remembers anniversaries

- Brings up having kids

omg hii anon!!! sorry it took me so long to respond 😞😞

to be honest I didn't really understand the question, is it a trend? like, say who would do this or that? I interpreted that way so i will do it that way, sorry if I got it wrong 💔

1- gives nose/forehead kisses

Definitely Uraraka! she always kisses toga's forehead and nose to show that she loves and cares for her. She does this every day before going to work.

2- Gets jealous the most

Okay, it would definitely be Toga. Himiko's jealousy is not exactly possessive, but rather insecure jealousy. She's afraid that Ochako will find someone better and "less weird" and end up leaving her. Even when Uraraka's assurances that this won't happen, she still has insecurities about it which ends up resulting in jealousy of anyone she doesn't know and talks to Uraraka.

3- Picks the other up from the bar when they're too drunk to drive

I thought a lot and came to the conclusion that Himiko doesn't like alcohol. She seems to be someone who likes sweet drinks, and despite having sweet alcoholic drinks she avoids them because she believes she doesn't need alcohol to have fun. But there are exceptions, and in these exceptions Ochako always goes to look for her little girlfriend in the bar. Himiko does the same for her, but she doesn't know how to drive 😭😭 so she gets a ride from one of her friends to drop her off at Uraraka's apartment

4- takes care of on sick days

BOTH YOUR HONOR!!!

I can perfectly imagine Ochako taking care of a sick and spoiled Himiko and I can also imagine Himiko taking care of a very stubborn Ochako.

Uraraka HATES hospitals so she does everything to avoid them, so she's always ends up accepting Toga to take care of her despite being extremely stubborn and swearing that "I can take care of myself"

5- Drags the other person out into the water on beach day

Himiko! She doesn't see the point of a beach day without going into the water, so she drags Ochako with her and always ends up forgetting to put on sunscreen. One time she ended up all burned and was mumbling for hours because her skin hurt 💔😞 Uraraka never let her forget again

6- gives unprompted messages

THIS IS SO HIMIKO CODED

She likes to text her girlfriend about ANYTHING even though she knows Ochako won't respond right away. She uses kamojis (mainly the ":333") and sends Uraraka a lot of pictures of herself or little things about her day and Uraraka LOVES IT. If Toga ever stopped texting about everything, she would definitely find it weird

7- Drives/rides shotgun

As I said before: I'm pretty sure Himiko doesn't know how to drive, at least not yet. So she always gets rides from her girlfriend to go places. After all, Ochako knows how to drive (in my head...) And if Himiko were to ever drive, it would be a motorcycle!!!

8- brings the other lunch at work

BOTH!!! but one detail: toga doesn't know how to cook very well, so it's always a surprise if the food is going to be half-burnt or raw. Her specialty is making sweets, but she doesn't only live on sweets, so she trains a lot to cook something delicious and healthy for ochako. She always stares at Uraraka while they're eat together just to make sure that it's really tasty...

And when the food isn't good, ochako goes out to buy them something to eat. Money has always been something that Uraraka lacks in her life, so when she spends it on food for herself and her girlfriend, she just feels so happy and fulfilled. It's something important to her. Is a way of saying that she cares about Himiko and that she's happy that she can buy something for both of them.

9- Has the better parental relationship

Uraraka

I don't think I need to elaborate much...

10- tries to start role-playing in bed

I didn't quite understand the question 😭😭 that would be like something obscene right?

Honestly, I don't think Himiko would do that. She's certainly not innocent, but she's a little too shy and ashamed to try something. Especially something like RPG. I believe that in the beginning she would be very embarrassed and insecure, she wouldn't know what to do and would be more lost than ochako (who is also embarrassed and insecure).

And after talking and spending a lot of time together, they would stop being so embarrassed and insecure and could try new things. I don't think RPG would be one of them, because in RPG you need to make a character and Himiko wants Ochako and only her. Just like Ochako wants Toga and only that.

(sorry for giving such a vanilla answer 😭😭)

11- embarrassingly drunk dancer

HIMIKOOOOOO

She doesn't do sexy dances or anything like that, she just DANCES!!! and she doesn't know how to dance, so it ends up becoming somewhat embarrassing. She has a lot of fun doing this and doesn't care about people's looks... EXCEPT ONE, she only cares about one... (ochako looks at her as if she were the most precious thing in the world while she dances macarena with denki and kirishima).

12- still cries watching Titanic

*sigh*... himiko—

13- firmly believes in couple costumes

TOGA! She loves couples costumes and always has some creative idea of what to wear with Ochako on Halloween or other events. She seems very happy organizing everything, so Ochako doesn't even try to stop her. Himiko knows what she's doing and she's more than happy to follow in her footsteps.

(I didn't quite understand the question but I hope I answered it coherently) (english is not my first language)

14- breaks the expansive gift rule during christmas

I CAN'T STOP SAY HIMIKO

She would be so nervous and wanting to please that she spent all her money buying something that everyone would like 💔💔😭 she wanted them to like her and have a good impression

15- makes the other eat breakfast

BOTH

Ochako is always concerned that Himiko is eating well and Himiko always uses Ochako as a guinea pig to see if her cooking skills are improving 🙏🙏

16- remembers anniversaries

Hi....mi....ko 👹

She's the type of person who enjoys celebrating other people's birthdays more than her own. She always writes down everyone's birthday on her calendar and tries to give them a gift on that day. Unlike Ochako who always ends up forgetting and getting super nervous when she realizes it's a close friend's birthday

17- brings up having kids

It may sound crazy (or not), but it would be Himiko. She would try to talk about this with Uraraka to get out the feeling of thinking she would be a terrible mother, only for Ochako to assure her that she would be one of the best mothers. I don't think they would have children any time soon, but they would definitely have a pet and take care of it as if it were a child.

Himiko would buy him clothes and Ochako would very reluctantly let him sleep in them despite the fact that they shed a lot of hair...

[honestlyno]

Notebook 3

My humanity could eat shit and die. I hated it. What define us as humans? Which human is righteous and which is the villain of the story? Who gets to decided all that and make the rules?

It was all bullshit. How could someone think "humanity" and then immediately think of "morality"? How did people even come up with those terms? Why can't we all just be people?

I am being hypocritical. I hated people and despised the ones who tried to think of themselves as something more than the others. All the while i was engrossed in the history of some of the cruellest dictators. I loved reading about how their reign made people feel, how their psychology and sociology changed during the years. All of those things and more helped me gain better understanding on the ugly creature that is the human.

I continued my act during school and locked myself in my room every night to not get interrupted while my mind was running miles an hour thinking of life, death, cruelty and morality. I was trying to define my humanity, all the things that made me feel like a useless person. I got annoyed at people who often recorded themselves and posted videos about some "spiritual" realization, only to talk about the ideas of somebody else and copy all of the person's personality. They were all as fake as me and i was getting angry that they weren't doing such a good job at acting as i was.

"You look cold."

I hated that sentence with passion. Wherever i was meeting with somebody knew i gave my best to look presentable, funny, friendly and ready to mingle with the new person i was getting to know. Yet they always responded with that simple sentence that brought me to Earth with a shot to the mind and a bucket of cold water over my body. I would often snap and leave but my snapping couldn't be described as an ordinary one. And it's pretty easy. I drop my smile, stare with cold eyes at the person and then take my leave without saying anything. That hurts more than being rejected and i knew it because ordinary people didn't like silence, being ignored and sassy young human beings like themselves.

Suicidal tendencies were something i came to possess after much trauma and thoughts on life and meaning. I loved spending time just thinking about things i knew would never interest someone else. That's what i thought made my mind unique and that's exactly how I've written my doom. Falling from a high place felt exhilarating, cutting at the skin on my hands felt freeing, pulling at the skin around my nails untill the bleeding wouldn't stop felt like a much needed punishment. And all of this because I didn't have a childhood one would describe as happy.

My parents weren't rich so they worked a lot which automatically meant less time for me. Most of my childhood was spent with my grandparents who gave their best to turn me into a human. They somehow succeeded. But the need for my mother was powering over those feelings, leaving me with a sense of dread and sadness.

I was the first born, loved by all. I was the first child from my generation in the family, i had everything and everyone wrapped around my finger. Maybe that's why i didn't feel the numbness that took over when I wasn't with my parents.

[thebrilliantretort]

El (OC) Series

Part 1: Beginnings

OC Masterlist

˚˙༓࿇༓˙˚˙༓࿇༓˙˚˙༓࿇༓˙˚˙༓࿇༓˙˚˙༓࿇༓˙˚˚˙༓࿇༓˙˚˙༓࿇༓˙˚˙༓࿇༓˙˚˙༓࿇༓˙˚˙

Previously mentioned in my OC list, El spent some years as a maid/slave for a noble drow family in Menzoberranzan.

(TLDR: El is an OC based out of the BG3 game, Half mystery Elf - Half Drow Rogue. This takes place before the parasite infection)

- no TW that I can think of

This noble family consisted of the lady of the house, her husband, one son, and one daughter.

This family wasn’t the richest nor the most influential but still had plenty of power within the city

I mostly remember the day I was taken from Braeryn. It was as plain as plain gets for me on the streets, in an alley playing some kind of gambling game with some of the other locals. My back against one of the walls but my body was visible to those walking the street.

We all heard people silencing each other and scurrying about. Some of the players got up to check while I took the opportunity to give myself a winning hand quickly. I then went to peak around the others piled against the corner of the opposite wall I had been resting against. Drow mercenaries covered with matching armor with Lolth’s insignia on them. Expensive, definitely from the highest parts of the upper district. They came marching down, grabbing only those who looked like drow, pushing the rest of the undercreatures aside. Some they took and shackled, the others that they must have deemed unworthy were shoved away. I slowly began to sneak back into the alley when one of mercenaries pointed in our direction and yelled something about “weird hair.”

I unfortunately stuck out like a sore thumb being very obviously half drow, which was very rare in the Underdark. Most half children were taken to the surface after their birth because of the mistreatment they’d undoubted receive in the Underdark. Not only that, my appearance was dramatically different than anyone else I’d ever seen. Pale ash-toned skin, slightly freckled face, and a streak of brown amidst the white that encompassed the front part of my hair around my face.

My heart dropped, I began to run to the other side of the alley, hoping to sneak behind the buildings fast enough to loose them.

“Grab her!” One of the mercenaries screamed.

Now, I don’t blame my “acquaintances” for what they did. I know very well what would have happened to them and their families if they disobeyed the mercenaries orders. The Underdark, where ever you are, is brutal and ruthless. Nowhere is safe.

My group all turned to chase after me as I tried to escape. A hobgoblin, who’s name escapes me now, managed to grab my arm. And in a flurry of bodies and hands grabbing at me, I was shackled and walked around the streets further.

The mercenaries grabbed and shoved for a few more hours with little fruit to show for their labor. Eventually hauling me and 3 other lower drow up to the floating city.

———————————————————————————

Walking into the corridor of the nicest and biggest house that probably ever existed to me then, I remained calm and kept my gawking at the luxurious decor and furnishing to a minimum. Noting the doors, balconies, and windows as best I could as we continued moving into the house. All the things you could steal without sneaking into a single room, picking a single lock, that cost more than all of the possessions of everyone who inhabited Braeryn times 10 completely entranced me. It was almost overwhelming, I didn’t even notice we had been led into what looked like a study. So much open space for a room seemly dedicated to books alone. This room could house at least 20 goblinoids in the slums.

A beautiful drow woman sat at the large desk we had been lined up in front of. She didn’t bother to look up from her writing when we enter the room with the mercenaries, taking her time finishing up whatever it was she was working on. Her hair was long and silky, with half tied up in a braided bun - like a glowing spider’s prey cocoon, her nails long and polished, wearing a deep purple armor-like dress with Lolth’s insignia.

I knew Menzoberranzan was dedicated to the Spider Queen but in slums - religion was lost completely. Of course, if some kind of officials made a visit (which almost never happens) the locals knew to pretend worship in fear of whatever twisted punishment the higher ups drummed up for us. I had no felty to Lolth, or any god/goddess, I relied on myself and that was all I needed. I was well versed in Lolth worship, however, for sticky situations like these. But this time I felt as though I was in way over my head.

The woman finally looked up from her papers with a sigh. Slowly looking the 4 of us over with an almost disgusted look on her face.

“Gods, they smell absolutely disgusting.” She mumbled.

The woman stood up from her desk and walked to stand in front of her captives. She languidly walked up and down the line, suddenly stopping in front of the boy that was third in line. This boy, I assumed, was younger than me but taller. His long white hair matted against his head and clothes two sizes too small for him.

“Not this one, I’m sure Xanaterna and her spiderlings are ravenous... but hose it off before the feeding, I don’t want my spiders getting sick.” Completely expressionless was her face, like she didn’t just sentence a child to death.

The mercenary nodded and began to unshackle the boy. The boy looked around the room, pleading to anyone present to help him, to save him. Sobbing and screaming as he was dragged away.

It felt as though the air was suddenly sucked out of the room. Everyone, including the mercenaries, stiffened as she kept on her path to her last new toy - me.

She paused in front of me, the bile in my stomach began to spill into my throat. Terrified I would be joining that boy with the spiders.

Her elegant hand reached up to grab the chunk of brown hair that had fallen onto my face, the ends stuck to the corner of my mouth. The woman gently brushed the strands away from my face and eyes.

“You…” she squinted, then quickly wrapped my ponytail around her fist and yanked me closer to her face.

“You, my dear, have a powerful aura, but you are only half drow. What taints your blood, child?”

“My father was some kind of surface elf. I don’t know exactly.” I grunted, thinking it best to behave and ignore the obvious insult for now. It’s not the first time someone asked me this, but the truth is I never knew my parents. None of the locals knew anything about them either, only whispers that they were murdered by nobles. Who knows if that’s anywhere near the truth.

“Hmm… I’ve seldom seen your kind. You’d be almost beautiful if not for being partially darthiir.”

She released my hair and waved to the mercenary next to me.

“Keep this one around the house, I’d like to study her - you’re dismissed.”

And with that, I was taken to room one flight down with one of the other captives. The room was significantly smaller than the study but much bigger than any room I had ever stayed in. That was my home for the next few years.

[what-dat-ritalin-do]

#3

Tuesday, 21st Nov 2023

12:58 PM

A bit of a late start again today. I woke up early and managed to go out for breakfast with my family. At around 8:30 AM my breakfast was as follows: 

Hor Fun noodle soup with shredded chicken

A glass of iced Ipoh White Coffee 

Ondeh-ondeh 

I sort of goofed off for a bit before finally showering and getting dressed for the day. I took my medication about 10 minutes ago so it should have started to take effect by the time I’m writing this entry. 

It has been about 12 days since I last took medication. Partially because of the holiday period, and also because of some other reasons. I think I was a bit hesitant to take it after the last two times because of the jarring reactions. For one thing, the experiences themselves were jarring enough– one moment I’m in complete control of my body (noticeably more than I usually am), and the next I lose all control of it to the point where I can’t even lift my body out of its stationary position. Then there’s comparing the experiences together. In attempt #1 I was fluctuating between flurry and clear states, in attempt #2 I blacked out entirely before being awarded one hour of uninterrupted lucidity. 

I kept on trying to accommodate these reactions and it became a big obstacle. It became a big 4-hour block I was trying to fit into my already erratic schedule. I couldn’t even fit 1-2 hour errands (accounting for the amount of time it takes for me to get dressed, travel, and actually run the errands) into my day. Trying to fit in a whole 4-hour block of potentially feeling possessed was just impossible. 

I managed to recollect myself and readjust my perspective: I’m going to see how the medication reacts with my therapy sessions. I had originally planned not to take medication on the days of my sessions, especially after attempt #1 because I was afraid I’d have such a bad reaction, I’d miss them. But this time around, I wondered if I would behave differently if I was medicated. This is how I “convinced myself” to take the medication. 

The last hour of the 4-hour active block seems to be the most stable so I’m going to try (*) to see if it’ll affect my sessions.

4:19 PM 

I’m done with therapy and I’m currently writing from the building’s parking lot so my girlfriend can pick me up (is it relevant to mention I’m gay?). She might come at any moment so my writing may suddenly cut off. 

The effects should be steadily wearing off soon and I’m feeling jittery and dizzy. Perhaps because I talked a lot during my session. I remember speaking at a slightly faster pace today, but I think I tripped over my words a lot too because it felt like my thoughts were moving faster than my mouth was. I haven’t eaten since 8:30AM so maybe I need to eat something. I’ll be running errands with my girlfriend for a bit so I’ll grab something to eat then. 

While I was writing the last paragraph from my first check in of today, I experienced a sudden numbness in my wrist and palm. This occurred at the (*) symbol. This was preceded by an abrupt heaviness in my head. I almost face-planted onto my desk and my body felt limp. It didn’t last very long, maybe less than 5 minutes. When I came to, I felt a stiffness in my hand. I had planned to write more, but I found it hard to hold a pencil. It wasn’t, however, difficult for me to type. I was in the mood to communicate something and I was able to type, so I decided to do something I’ve been meaning to do for a couple of weeks now: Open up a blog and type out all these journal entries so it’s easier for anyone who’s interested to keep up.

My girlfriend is here so I’ll be continuing this entry after being able to walk around and have something to eat. 

6:52 PM

I’m back and my head is still slightly dizzy, but I’m feeling a lot better. I had a small chicken wrap and some iced tea after doing some shopping around a local mall. I got a minimal amount of physical activity and some carbs from the sugar in the sweet tea and the wrap so I have some energy to continue typing this entry. 

Yes, typing. I didn’t have too much trouble writing the previous check-in in my journal, but now that I’m home, for some reason my wrist feels very heavy so this final check-in of the day will be typed. I’m not sure why this is happening. After mentioning it during my session, S suggested it might be because my dosage is too high. I had the same hunch, but we both agreed I shouldn’t change anything until I get to see Dr. J again on the 29th.

I feel the effects, wearing off. My mind is slowing down. 

I remember my thoughts moving very fast when I was in today’s session. I had mentioned in previous sessions (before we even concluded a diagnosis) that my brain felt like a busy central station. I had many “trains of thought” going off at the same time and it was difficult to address them all at the same time. I’d get so overwhelmed that I couldn’t fit all of these differing (sometimes conflicting) “conversations” into my head, I’d get overwhelmed and reach an impasse where I just get catatonic. 

But on medication– particularly in my most lucid hour– it was like being on one singular train track, steadily chugging along at a fast pace. I wasn’t a terminal where many thoughts converged and I had to divide my attention to satisfy all of them. I was just “riding” one state of mind where I was not only dynamic (as opposed to stationary), I was moving in one stable direction. 

The next challenge is being able to point myself in the “right” direction. I have the energy and motivation to move. I want to move and do something, but I can’t seem to do what I’m supposed to do. I’m supposed to be doing research for my final year thesis (something I’ve been struggling to do for three years and is largely the focus of even why I was looking for a diagnosis), but I just don’t want to. 

I don’t want to do it.

That sentence was so hard for me to say because of how much weight it carried. Money for one thing. It’s not cheap to re-do a thesis, let alone three times. There’s a lot of guilt in it. A lot of baggage. But it was so easy to say it out loud in the therapy room today when I was medicated. 

The weight wasn’t there when I said it. I could just say it out loud– multiple times even. I didn’t feel like I had to “earn” the right to say it. My thinking behind that decision was simple:

I don’t want to do my thesis -> I want to know why -> I’ll tell my therapist about it -> We’ll confront it together and get to the bottom of it.

It seems so logical doesn’t it? It seems so straightforward? So why did it take me three years to be able to do this?

Being on medication is really amazing in a terrible sort of way. 

I had discussed in a previous session with S that I was afraid of feeling like my life was “stolen” from me because I didn’t find out I had ADHD sooner. That if I had gotten medication–or any kind of treatment at all– I might have been more successful. I might have graduated “on time” with good results. I might have had multiple certifications. There was an endless sea of wasted potential and broken possibilities because I couldn’t sit down and focus on one thing at a time. 

Perhaps I’ll go into that in another entry. This one is long enough already. The conclusion we came to in that session is that we can’t change the past, but we can change the future. Now, I have a diagnosis (that I worked very hard to get), medication, and a structured treatment plan. 

In fact we discussed part of the plan today! I’m writing down my “therapy homework” for today so I can have some accountability: 

With CBT, we want to tackle that “I don’t want to do my thesis” thought by challenging the rationales that make it up. For example, currently my brain is like this:

Thought: I don’t want to do my thesis because I will not be able to complete reading and understanding one article in one hour” 

Behaviour: I avoid doing any reading. 

Feelings: I feel guilty I didn’t do any work even though I had time to do it. It makes me lose confidence and feel like I’m incompetent.

In order to change the rationale behind this thought, I have to challenge it.  I’m not terrible at research and I know I genuinely like and enjoy psychology. That’s the whole reason this blog exists! 

So I guess S decided to leverage on that and turn my homework into a little “data collection” activity. I’ll become my own experiment:

Aim: To systematically challenge thoughts that precede maladaptive behaviors

Statement to Disprove (Thought): I am unable to read and understand an article in one hour.

Method: Choose a day, take Ritalin, and read a “doable” article 

Record Findings: - Record thoughts and feelings (perhaps via a mood tracker) throughout the activity. - Be aware I may not get it right the first time. It’s not about “getting it right”, it’s about doing the activity. 

That should be enough for this very loooong entry. I’ll hopefully update tomorrow!

[byhismercyandgrace]

What was Missing?

If you would have told me a year ago that I will be sitting down a year later writing about my journey back to the Catholic Church, I would have respectfully told you that you were out of your mind.  But the reality is, I've always felt like something in my life was missing, a hole in my heart that no matter what I filled it with, it would never suffice.

I have to be honest and flat out tell you that throughout the years I have attempted to fill said gap in my heart with many things that I thought would fill it and have failed miserably. Those times were definitely not my brightest but I can confidently say now that these experiences molded me into the person I am today.

 It was truly frustrating at times because despite all life’s hurdles, I have truly lived a pretty blessed life. It's kind of like binge eating for example some people binge on food when they're sad, but then get sad because they binged on food; now this is just an example (that probably doesn't make sense) but let's face it, we have all been there. It took losing everything I loved, possessed, and losing myself for me to finally surrender and to go on a journey of self-discovery.  My long-term goal was to be able to answer: What was missing?

I got to a truly very low point in my life, I would feel so alone, scared, had very pessimistic thoughts and had racing suicidal ideations. One night at around 2 or 3 am, I felt a true discomfort and decided to give in and wake up. I had these thoughts in my head about building a community and while these thoughts crossed my head, I took out my phone under the covers and started searching on Google for Churches in the area. I came across a nearby church and when I clicked to see its webpage it landed on an announcement for a spiritual retreat. I said to myself, well I have tried everything and at this point I really have nothing else to lose, so I signed up.

The retreat weekend came, and I didn't know what to think, everything aligned so perfectly and I just didn't know what to expect but I was excited. When I first arrived I was in a complete state of awe as everyone was so friendly, warm and just so happy to see me despite not knowing who I was. It felt like home.

As the day progressed, I found myself meeting remarkable, strong women who shared their life stories. One of those women sat beside me and after a couple of hours, looked at me, hugged me and told me she loved me. It was raw, genuine and from a stranger and yet that I love you pierced my heart in ways you cannot imagine. Little did I know this was the first of many expressions of love that I received that weekend.

Later that night, came reconciliation (or Confession) and mind you having been estranged from the Catholic Church for almost 20 years, I had no idea what I was doing, but I decided to trust. As I walk in the pew, I asked the father to please forgive me as I didn't know what to do and what to say and that all I had to say was that I admitted having truly been a sinner and I am not worthy of such signs of love and affection. All I could do from that point on was just cry. The priest replied: "My child, you are one of the lost ones, a deeply wounded soul. You do not have to say anything for the Lord reads your tears. He knows your heartaches. But you must know, you are forgiven." As I heard those words, I suddenly felt a weight had been lifted. As I walked out, I remember just looking up and saying God I am not worthy of your mercy, while I sobbed.  A lady grabbed me in her hands, kissed my forehead and as she rocked me back and forth, she repeated " Never forget that you are a child of God and he loves you with all his heart". As she did this, she walked me to light my candle of faith and as the candle was lit I remember feeling this sense of closure. It was at that moment in time I knew, It wasn't possessions, relationships, friendships, that I was missing, it was the Lord Jesus Christ in my heart and what Jesus signifies; Unconditional Love.

Psychcentral.com defines unconditional love as the selfless act of loving someone with full acceptance and without expecting anything in return. Despise every single wrong thing I have ever done in my life and all the times I denied Jesus, he kept showing up for me. Jesus moved these ladies, complete strangers, who caught me when I broke down, consoled me and wiped my tears. These ladies did not know what was in my heart and despite all that they consoled me as their child. Through them Jesus showed up, he showed me mercy and grace, he showed me, that I am worthy, I am special, I am loved, I am strong and that all I needed to do now was to surrender my life to him, learn his ways and walk with him for with him nothing is impossible.

Colossians 3:1-17

Therefore, if you have been raised with Christ, keep seeking the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2 [a]Set your minds on the things that are above, not on the things that are on earth. 3 For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. 4 When Christ, who is our life, is revealed, then you also will be revealed with Him in glory.

5 Therefore, [b]treat the parts of your earthly body as dead to sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and greed, which [c]amounts to idolatry. 6 For it is because of these things that the wrath of God is coming [d]upon the [e]sons of disobedience, 7 and in them you also once walked, when you were living [f]in them. 8 But now you also, rid yourselves of all of them: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene speech from your mouth. 9 [g]Do not lie to one another, since you stripped off the old [h]self with its evil practices, 10 and have put on the new self, which is being [i]renewed to a true knowledge according to the image of the One who created it— 11 a renewal in which there is no distinction between Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, [j]barbarian, [k]Scythian, slave, and free, but Christ is all, and in all.

12 So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and [l]patience; 13 bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so must you do also. 14 In addition to all these things put on love, which is [m]the perfect bond of unity. 15 Let the peace of Christ, to which you were [n]indeed called in one body, [o]rule in your hearts; and [p]be thankful. 16 Let the word of [q]Christ richly dwell within you, [r]with all wisdom teaching and admonishing [s]one another with psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God. 17 Whatever you do in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father.

Love,

Hope.

P.S. This post is dedicated to M.S. my beloved Sister in Christ who Jesus has welcomed home. May she rest in peace.

St. Therese of Lisieux - The Little Flower

St. Theresa Little Flower once said: “If a little flower could speak, it seems to me that it would tell us quite simply all that God has done for it, without hiding any of its gifts.”

Catholics Come Home | Welcome Home

Católicos Regresen | BIENVENIDOS. (catolicosregresen.org)

[televinita]

I'm so sorry to update this again but you see it has been Another 9 Days (actually ten), and not only have I read a bunch, yesterday I got the urge to clean house, return stuff & refill my library card with fully random new possibilities (partly to help curb my BookOutlet cart), so I have to organize them. And I don't wanna type out the few things that are remaining again, so update instead of a fresh post it is!

CURRENTLY READING / LISTENING

Beyond Ivy Walls - Rachel Fordham: 83% in on audio (just under 2 hours left). I'm pretty set on a 3-star rating at this point but the romance has been a'right for the last third.

TRYING TO CHOOSE MY NEXT READ FROM:

1. Tilly in Technicolor - Mazey Eddings: a YA novel about...something! I impulse-added this to my BookOutlet cart because they have the hardcover and I vaguely remember it catching my eye months ago, and I wanted to see if I could be content just borrowing it. I think I will be because I don't see this romance clicking for me. But traveling around Europe as her sister's intern for the summer sounds like it could be a fun time! (3 stars in the good way, when I go in with no expectations of more) I don't usually read summer books in winter but this could be a fun break?

2. Things We Didn't Say - Amy Lynn Green: LONGER than I bargained for, especially since WWII novels have to catch me in just the right mood anyway, but this one came to my attention a few months ago and I was plucking recent adds off my Goodreads TBR. It's set on the homefront, in Minnesota specifically, in a rural town that hosted a German POW camp where low-risk prisoners were sent to work on farms.

3. Zero Stars, Do Not Recommend - MJ Wassmer: I didn't read very much about it because "the apocalypse but make it funny" sounds like a kick. I feel like men don't write very much lighthearted contemporary fiction, especially with a male protagonist, so I'm curious. And honestly, even if it's more serious than assumed, that will still be fun.

4. Extinction - Douglas Preston: this was the only option in the Goodreads Choice Awards for sci-fi that didn't sound boring as sin, so I voted for it and then decided I kind of wanted to read it actually, because there are mammoths and because I liked his brand of action-adventure in the two Gideon Crew novels I read from him.

5. Born of Gilded Mountains - Amanda Dykes*: a chunker of historical fiction but it looks fun! "When newcomer Mercy Windsor arrives in Mercy Peak in 1948 after a scandal shatters her gilded world as Hollywood's beloved leading lady, she is determined to forge a new life in obscurity in this time-forgotten Colorado haven. She purchases Wildwood--an abandoned estate with a haunting history--and begins to restore it to its former glory." Also there's an old mystery about a missing train and possibly treasure??

*[edit: between the time I queued this and when it appeared a few hours later I got halfway into this one! having a good time]

6. 26 Ways To Come Home For the Holidays - Jennifer Joy: I couldn't wait any longer and picked it up, in case I need to boost myself out of a slump with a relatively short (~160 pages), feel-good book. Also: what is with me subconsciously picking up All The 40s or Futuristic Books today??

7. The Christmas Dress - Courtney Cole: My Libby hold on the audio just came in, and last time I paused it I got pushed back to 2nd in line and it took a full month to get back. Dare I risk it again, and hope I still get it before Christmas, or should I just be wild and do like all the TV commercials are demanding I do and embrace the season? (I kind of wanna embrace the season, especially since I have no other audiobooks once I finish the current one...)

STILL IN MY POSSESSION BUT WAY ON THE BACK BURNER NOW

Legends & Lattes - Travis Baldree (I think I'm giving up on this tbh... but I might once again claim it's ~temporarily~)

Passenger Princess - Morgan Elizabeth (only if I'm desperate for a contemporary adult fiction at this point, lol)

COMING EVENTUALLY

Before We Were Us - Denise Hunter: it has been marked "in cataloging" for a week and a half now so I've hit pause while I work through the above set.

Games Untold - Jennifer Lynn Barnes: released November 12th but still "on order" in the catalog so freezing my hold on this too, because I don't want to check on it daily to see when it changes, and I don't want to be caught off guard because it's Very Long and it will have a decent-sized waitlist soon.

Reading Triage

I'm in a bit of a reading slump at the moment (a word which here means: I have only finished 4 books in 2 weeks), so what better way to fix it than by chucking back all my library books, picking out a brand-new set and/or placing holds, and then talking out the options!

CURRENTLY READING / LISTENING

1. A Study in Drowning - Ava Reid: this was all the rage last fall and I shrugged it off as "fantasy, not my thing," but fantasy IS kind of turning out to be my thing this year. So when I saw the new special edition w/ stenciled edges (featuring shelves of old books) in a Goodreads giveaway, I immediately investigated it further and oh, we're starting in dark academia, in an architectural college?? There's a house design contest?? Well that sounds great! So I'm giving it a go; got about 40 pages in last night.

2. The Spellshop - Sarah Beth Durst: this is my 2nd time around with it, because I wanted to hear the audiobook version. About 90 minutes left, and I better hop-to because it's due in 2 days.

3. One Of Our Own - Lucinda Berry: this is a just-under-4-hours audio exclusive thriller (is thriller the right word, it seems like a pretty domestic mystery), and I am literally only here because it's dual narration and the main narrator is A.J. Cook. The plot looks bland and unpleasant and after only 8% in I can all but guarantee it would be a 2-star in print, but I might give it 3 because listening to her voice is a treat.

AVAILABLE NOW

4. Legends & Lattes - Travis Baldree: attempt #2 to salvage the cozy coffee shop vibes out of an otherwise uninteresting story, now that the temps are finally about to drop down into at least the 50s, and if it doesn't work this time I quit forever because I have better fantasy places to be (but I really do wanna savor the romanticizing of coffee + baked goods).

5. Strongheart, Wonder Dog of the Silver Screen - Candace Fleming: I didn't buy it, but I am now more motivated than ever to read this. It's actually much shorter than I thought, being about 50% illustration, and I want to dive right in. Might even do so as soon as I post this, tbh.

6. Passenger Princess - Morgan Elizabeth: I feel honor-bound by winning it to read enough to offer a review. Honestly, the first chapter was quite fun, so if I just go in with determination to skip straight over the porn and judge the rest of the story on its own merit, I might enjoy it. (I will of course be judging more harshly for its Goodreads rating)

7. In The Shadow of Lakecrest - Elizabeth Blackwell: a 1920s Rebecca-esque novel that I own and have been meaning to read for 2 years now. I got so close to cracking it open this time...and I still might, but more likely the other books on this list will take priority.

8. Final Girls and/or The Last Time I Lied - Riley Sager: the references in Middle of the Night finally got me interested in these 2 I skipped the first time around, but it's still just...so hard to convince myself to try them, even when I crave a guaranteed good thriller. There's a reason I skipped over them the first time around, and that reason is they just look and sound generic as hell.

9. The Book of Cold Cases and/or Murder Road - Simone St. James: I spent literally the entire month of October a) not reading any ghost stories for lack of good options and being sad about it, and b) forgetting about this author literally every time I went to the library until the 28th. But now they're here! So...maybe! (more than likely pushed off til next year though. I don't feel particularly excited when I look at them, even though the first book at least has been on my TBR since its release)

10. The Widow of Rose House - Diana Biller: almost forgot one of the few remaining from my last round! A random checkout because it looks like an unusual sort of historical romance with like seven different appealing elements; lemme just copy the summary:

It's 1875, and Alva Webster has perfected her stiff upper lip after three years of being pilloried in the presses of two continents over fleeing her abusive husband. Now his sudden death allows her to return to New York to make a fresh start, restoring Liefdehuis, a dilapidated Hyde Park mansion, and hopefully her reputation at the same time. However, fresh starts aren't as easy as they seem, as Alva discovers when stories of a haunting at Liefdehuis begin to reach her. But Alva doesn't believe in ghosts. So when the eccentric and brilliant professor Samuel Moore appears and informs her that he can get to the bottom of the mystery that surrounds Liefdehuis, she turns him down flat. She doesn't need any more complications in her life--especially not a handsome, convention-flouting, scandal-raising one like Sam. Unfortunately, though Alva is loath to admit it, Sam, a pioneer in electric lighting and a member of the nationally-adored Moore family of scientists, is the only one who can help. Together, the two delve into the tragic secrets wreathing Alva's new home while Sam attempts to unlock Alva's history--and her heart

COMING SOON

11. Tracker's Canyon - Pam Withers: a YA novel about a teen using his outdoor/trailing skills to find his dad and evade people who may want to harm his dad (or him). It's been on my Goodreads TBR for 5+ years, picked when I was scrolling through looking for I.L.L. options. Looks fun and also relatively short, under 200 pages. Should be here in a week or two at the most.

12. A Wizard's Guide to Defensive Baking - T. Kingfisher: library doesn't have a physical copy so waiting on the e-book, estimated 3 weeks. I haven't read her before but I kept seeing this on BookTube and its title and cover looked so fun and cute. Probably a 3-star time but I still want in.

13. Piranesi - Susanna Clarke: this was on my original fall TBR at the beginning of September, and I've been slowly making my way towards it. No promises I'll read it this year, but if I don't get too distracted by the new shinies, the fact that this is much shorter than I thought has made me more willing to listen to its many rave reviews. Currently on a waitlist; "my" copy is due back on Halloween but I of course have zero faith in the people of this county at this point, so I'm going to bet more realistically on the second week of November (next copy is due back 11/9).

14. Before We Were Us - Denise Hunter: romance about an engaged woman who develops amnesia, not only forgetting her (relatively new) relationship but still viewing her middle-of-nowhere job at his family resort as a pit stop and ready to get the hell outta dodge; he must convince her to fall in love with him again. I WILL be going full Chuck/Sarah with this. Currently on-order at the library and I am first in line.

15. Beyond Ivy Walls - Rachel Fordham: This whole summary just sounds Immediately Great and like the kind of historical (1903) romance I love; wish I had access to a physical copy but waiting on the audiobook instead, estimated time 3 weeks. Love 2 have everything come crashing in at once!

All of Monticello believes Otis Taylor has been away fostering his musical genius. But the truth is that his father exiled him long ago, rejecting Otis's appearance and the scars that came with it. . . . At twenty-three years old, Sadie West left her family farm and found employment at the Hoag feather duster factory. Desperate to save money and help her family make ends meet, she trespasses and finds shelter in an abandoned building--and is thrown in the path of the town's mysterious bachelor. Otis's wounds are deep, but as Sadie's friendship with him grows, she begins to fall for the man beneath the mask

COMING EVENTUALLY!

16. Graveyard Shift - M.L. Rio: the reviews are so middling and I am also sure it will be a 3-star at best, but damn it, I got excited about this one months ago and now I HAVE TO KNOW (this is why knowing about new releases sucks! don't do it!). Waiting on an ebook copy because the library doesn't have a physical one. It is an absurdly long wait for such a short book (14 weeks?! i am PRAYING for a physical copy to be ordered soon).

17. Games Untold - Jennifer Lynn Barnes: on the other hand I am first in line when this releases in a couple weeks. Beyond excited for a collection of short stories and novellas aka BONUS SCENES for The Inheritance Games. (sometimes knowing about new releases doesn't suck)

18. 26 Ways To Come Home For the Holidays - Jennifer Joy: a "Thanksgiving to Christmas" novella romance about a department store in the 1940s. I have been excitedly waiting for it to be seasonally appropriate (for maximal impact) since spring. I still gotta give it 3 or 4 weeks though.

19. What Does It Feel Like? - Sophie Kinsella: 12th in line for 8 copies, at the library that doesn't show due dates so I'm guessing this may not arrive until December, at which point I might roll it over to the new year. Still, if it comes sooner, interested in this novella mirroring her real-life health crisis.

[whiskeynwriting]

Watch Me

Agent Daddy Whiskey x Female Reader

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Word Count: 3.7k

Warnings: 18+ (minors DNI) dirty talk, spanking, slight degradation (he calls you cockdumb and I’m WEAK), vaginal sex, rough sex, jealous and possessive Whiskey (god YES)

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A/N: Okay, I’m about to shock y’all: this is one of VERY FEW Daddy Whiskey fics where we don’t have the daddy kink. We are taking a trip back to the beginning of Whiskey and Babycakes’ relationship, about three or four months in. Don’t worry, it still gets spicy (;

Co-written by @sweetangel0069 because dear lord Anna did you give me some BEAUTIFUL ideas. If you guys find yourselves liking a certain line or description in this fic, it’s damn near a coin toss as to whether I wrote it, or Anna did lmao. Anna, please NEVER stop sending me your incredible thots <3

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You know you’re still in that honeymoon phase, still in your own perfect little world the two of you had made together. There was never anything wrong, never any fights, only peace, love, and happiness. You knew it would come to an end eventually, you knew that if you were going to stay together that there would eventually be hardships, but you were ready to face those when they came. Because as far as you’re concerned, Jack Daniels is in your life to stay.

While your age gap was more than obvious, the two of you had plenty of things in common. One of them being your love for loud music and trashy dive-bars. Something about the atmosphere is just so fun; the two of you downing your favorite drinks while dancing to old country songs. To Jack, it was his slice of heaven.

Speaking of Jack…

“Hey!”

“Hey, darlin’.” He returns, his tone displaying his grin. “I’m here, parked right outside.”

“Okay, I’ll be out in just a minute.” You tell him, smiling like a damn fool.

“See you then, sweet pea.”

Once you hang up the phone, you move to get your purse. You were so excited for the date you got ready nearly an hour early, making sure to wear that short dress you know Jack likes. It’s made of denim, the light blue fabric soft and smooth. The dress cinches in at your waist and ends a dangerous few inches past your hip. The sleeves are short, reaching your mid-bicep, and there are three buttons that allow you to choose your neckline, which you leave entirely open, knowing that’s how Jack likes it best. You finished your outfit off with a pair of simple, light brown, open-toed heels, the shade matching your bag.

When you walk outside, you’re delighted to see Jack waiting for you in his vintage Bronco. He has his elbow on the side of the car, his jaw in hand as he waits. His other hand rests on the steering wheel, lightly tapping along to a song. He’s wearing his aviator shades, his black hat matching the tone of his leather jacket. Beneath it, he wears a plan white t-shirt.

“Hey, sugar.” He greets, climbing out of the car to wrap you in a hug.

“Hi, baby.” You happily return, welcoming his kiss when he pulls back just enough to deliver it.

The rest of Jack’s attire consist of dark blue jeans, his flask belt buckle, and brown cowboy boots. You grin, humming happily at how he looks.

“Yeah?” he coos, watching your eyes dip down his figure. “You like what I’m wearin’, sweet cheeks?”

“Mhm,” your eyes return to his, lips curling to mirror his.

“I find myself feelin’ the same,” he flirts. “You look gorgeous, sugar.”

Even though Jack had certain outfits he liked best on you, he thought you looked beautiful in anything. After all, it’s really you who made the outfit look good.

Jack keeps his hand on your bare knee throughout the short drive, his thumb rubbing across the skin your dress had exposed, riding up slightly when you sat down. The top to the Bronco is down, the nighttime breeze flowing through your hair. You feel so at peace, so incredibly happy by his side. Nothing made a night more memorable than spending it with him.

The specific bar he takes you to is one the two of you have visited before. The bar tenders were nice, the drinks knocked you on your ass, and they even had a Jukebox, too. There was also a pool table in the back, the very table Jack taught you how to play on.

“Hey, Jack,”

“Hey there, Charlie.” Jack returns, pulling out a stool for you before taking a seat on one himself.

The bar tender greets you, too, having known you by name for some weeks now. He assumes both your drink orders, and assumes right.

“What do you wanna do tonight, sugar?” Jack asks, turning to you while Charlie makes your drinks.

“Do you wanna play pool again? I’m getting pretty good.” You smirk, knowing he’ll accept your playful challenge.

“You sure you wanna try that?” he teases. “You’re quite new to the game, babycakes. Wouldn’t want to embarrass you on your first independent round.”

You roll your eyes with a grin, grabbing your drink in hand when Charlie sets it down. “C’mon cowboy, I’ll show you what I got.”

And to Jack’s surprise, you’re giving him quite a run for his money. He wonders if you’d been practicing on your own or if you were just a natural talent. Up until now, he’d been helping you out on every turn whenever you’d play. But today, you’re all on your own, and he’s really having to give it his all.

Damn, he grins to himself. My baby’s got a spark.

When Jack’s about to take his final shot, aiming for the eight ball, he hears a few men murmur up ahead of him. His eyes glance up beneath his brow, looking at you from across the velvety green. Further behind you he sees a group of guys standing around, a couple of them turning to scan your form.

“Thanks for giving me the game, baby.” You tease, watching as he misses his shot.

Jack gives you a faux smile, fooling you but glaring at the younger men as soon as you turn around.

“Look at you,” he grins. “Guess I really did teach you well, huh?”

You giggle, reveling in his words as well as your first win. When you walk over to him, he wraps an arm around you, holding his cue stick in the other. His heart leaps from his chest when you give him a celebratory kiss, the hand on your back pressing your body against his. He can feel eyes on you as you do it, the attention only making him smirk against your lips.

She’s mine.

You convince Jack to play another round with you, thinking he’s hell bent on beating you now. But that couldn’t be farther from the truth. Honestly, he’s not even paying attention to the game anymore. That group of guys is still there, about five of them lurking behind you. Seeing them check you out for so long makes him want to take you home and wrap you in his arms, keep you in bed and never let anyone else look at you ever again. It also makes him want to knock their teeth out.

“Oh, come on! It’s like you’re not even trying!” you tease, winning once again.

With graceful feet and swinging hips, you saunter over to him, lightly patting his chest.

“You’re somethin’, baby.” He says, grinning down at you before his eyes flicker back up to the younger boys behind you. “C’mon, why don’t we go get another drink?”

With his hand on your lower back, he leads you over to the bar, ordering another round for you both. As usual, Charlie whips them up quick, a new drink back in your hand in mere seconds.

As you begin to take a sip, someone to your left clears their throat, drawing your attention. You turn, setting down your drink as you look at the man standing beside you.

“Hi,” he says, smiling kindly.

“Hi,” you return, unfamiliar with the man.

“I saw you playin’ pool over there and I just gotta say, you’re quite a good shooter.”

You smirk, “Oh, thanks. It’s only because I have the best teacher.” You’re referencing Jack, of course, and it makes him smile, heart pounding proudly in his chest. But the guy next to you doesn’t seem to get the hint.

“I guess so.” he grins. “How ‘bout I buy you a drink and let you play a round with me?”

Your eyes widen at his offer, quickly furrowing your eyebrows with one raising high. And while your reaction seems appropriate, Jack’s is anything but. He’s doing everything he can to stay calm. He can’t fucking believe this guy just asked to take you out right in front of him. He knows for a fact he saw your kiss; what an arrogant little prick.

“Oh, I’m fine, thank you. I’m actually here with my boyfriend.” You smile proudly, turning slightly toward Jack.

Jack eyes the younger man and has been since he first stepped toward you, hell, he’s been eyeing him since he first looked at you. Jack’s gaze is mean yet smug, knowing he has what the other men want, what this man wants. He gives him a slight nod, raising two fingers to his forehead in a cocky little salute.

Your rejection, although in the kindest form, infuriates him. He scowls at Jack, and then turns to you, laughing arrogantly.

“Boyfriend? That’s gotta be a joke.”

Jack’s even-expression turns sour at this, his thread of patience officially cut. Your jaw drops, both brows raising in shock. Who the fuck does he think he is?

“He’s old enough to be your dad! There’s no fucking way you’re with him.”

At this point, he’s officially pissed you off. You knew the age gap between you and Jack raised some eyebrows, but neither of you cared about that. The people close to you supported you no matter what, and honestly, your age gap just made the two of you even hotter for each other.

“I’m well aware of his age,” you retort, giving him an unamused frown after you scoff. “And I actually really like it. I’m more than done with this conversation, so you can go fuck off.”

Jack is absolutely fuming, and even though your back is turned toward him for the moment, you can practically feel the anger radiating off him. You feel so bad, he must be so upset. What if he’s embarrassed? Immediately, you turn to him, blabbering out every word you can as you try to piece together some sort of an apology. And while your efforts don’t go unnoticed, they’re certainly unnecessary. Jack isn’t even listening. He just stares at you, stares into you, and before you know it, he’s grabbing you by your arm and hauling you out of your seat.

You’re stumbling along behind him as he struts toward the door. Is he taking you home? Is he upset with you? You’ve never had an argument before, not a real one, at least. You’ve had disagreements, sure, but you’ve never seen him so angry before. You were having such a good night, is he really going to let some stupid guy ruin it all for you?

Just as you’re about to walk up to the door, he turns, leading you down a short hall. At the end of it sits a door leading to the establishment’s only bathroom. Your breath catches in your throat, your heart racing and nearly lurching from your chest. With one push, he opens the door, a second shove forcing you in. You stumble forward, turning to see him locking the door.

“B – baby,” you stammer out. “I’m so sorry! That guy was an asshole! Please, don’t be mad.”

Your words stumble out haphazardly, doing whatever you can to deescalate the situation. But toward the end of your brief ramble, Jack turns, moving forward with sure steps. The bathroom door opened up into another short hall, a corridor to the right of it leading into the small space with a single toilet and sink. As Jack approaches you, your steps move backward, his body quickly pinning you against the wall at the back of the short hall. His body crowds yours against the firm surface, his hot breath in your face.

“Oh, baby, I know that guy is a prick. He pissed me off, but you… you sweet, young thing. The way you told him off got me hard, sugar.” His body moves against you, grinding his hips into yours as his mouth lowers to your ear. “You like that I’m older? Huh? Does my age turn you on, darlin’?”

You realize now that Jack isn’t mad at you, and that any anger he felt has been clouded by an incredibly exciting arousal. The fact that this all turned him on makes you feel needy, submissive, eager to please. An uncontrollable passion overcomes you, consuming both your body and mind alike.

All at once, your lips crash into his, forcing a groan from his throat. Both of your hands reach for his neck, pushing his mouth further against your own. He parts your lips with his mouth, eagerly licking inside. He moans into you when your teeth nip at his lower lip, your lips capturing his tongue and sucking it out of his mouth. He shoves his head away from you, ripping himself from the hold your lips have on his tongue before he returns, diving back inside all over again.

As you continue to kiss, continue to lick into the other’s mouth, Jack moves his hands to your hips. His strong arms force you to the side, pulling you over to the counter before spinning you around. Jack smiles, looking over your shoulder as you gaze at your reflection together. You’re already a mess, your chest heaving with anticipation, your lips already swollen beneath lust-blown eyes.

“You’re so beautiful, baby.” Jack always did love to see you wrecked, and in all honesty, this is nothing compared to when you were at home. His eyes dip lower, exploring your exposed cleavage. "My pretty little girl."

"Baby..."

“Jesus Christ,” he mumbles, strong hands pawing at your ass. “You sexy little thing.”

He groans out, leaning back to hike your dress up over your ass. His hands return, now landing on bare skin. His jaw drops at the sight, eagerly landing a single, harsh slap.

“Watch me, baby.” Jack says, his eyes meeting yours in the mirror, his handsome face on full display. “Want you to watch this old man fuck your pretty little pussy.”

“Baby,” you gasp out, lips parting in awe at his words. Your fingers grip the porcelain sink, skin shivering with excitement.

Thick fingers wrap around the fabric of your thong, pulling it down your thighs just enough for him to slide inside. He can already feel how wet you are, how turned on you are from him. Jack’s head then drops back down, unbuckling his belt and then undoing his zipper.

“You’re so handsome, baby.” You sigh out, unable to pull your eyes away from the reflection of him.

Jack grins at your words, his lips parting as he pulls himself out. He keeps his head down, lifting his right hand and spitting into his palm. Your inner walls clench at the sight and sound, watching as he grips himself, running his fist over his thick length and using his own spit to lube himself up. Jack’s left hand then grabs hold of your lower cheek, spreading you slightly as he steadies his breath. But you barely have a chance to catch your own before he’s slamming his cock into you. You’re used to Jack’s eager passion, his pace always rough and hard, shoving himself deep, but for some reason, you didn’t expect him to do so here. You’re shocked at the stretch, his length feeling even bigger from behind.

The force of his thrusts nearly make your muscles go limp, your head dropping down between your shoulders as he fucks into you. And he sees this when he lifts his head, both hands now on your hips. He frowns, narrowing his brows. He told you to watch, so that’s exactly what he’s going to make you do. Almost instantly, his right hand reaches around, gripping your chin in hand to pull your face back up. Your eyes return to the lewd image, the reflection of you and him.

“Keep that pretty head up, babycakes. Told you to watch me; watch me fuck you.” he grunts out, his hips snapping harshly against your backside as he repeatedly plunges inside. “Such a pretty young thing, ain’t you, baby? Taking this old man’s cock so well. You’re such a fuckin’ slut, sugar. My slut.”

Jack’s filthy words never fail to turn you on, his voice alone enough to make your center weep. It’s unbelievable, the amount of euphoria Jack’s able to pull from your veins.

You want to speak to him, return the filth that falls so easily from his lips, but all you can manage out are small, breathy moans. He’s so close to you, his chest pressed flush against your back. He hits deep, punching himself against that sweet spot that makes you fucking drool. And all you can do is keep yourself in place for him, taking every single thrust he gives you.

“Oh, look at that. Is my baby goin’ cockdumb already?” he teases, nuzzling his nose against your neck, just below your ear.

You can feel his smirk pressing up against your skin, his heated breaths washing over you in waves. The barely-there stubble along his jawline rubs harshly against your skin, the hairs of his mustache tickling your neck.

His hands wander your body, one of them rising to the cleavage you so proudly show off. Due to your lack of secured buttons, he’s able to slip a hand inside, grabbing a fistful of your tit.

“No bra, huh?” he murmurs, the thickness of him throbbing inside you. He palms at you, sliding his thumb over your nipple. “I knew I could see those perky tits; knew I could see those pretty little nipples showing through.”

Jack’s mouth moves to your ear, nipping at your lobe before licking a stripe up the cuff. He groans, the vibrations from his chest and throat rumbling across your shoulder.

“B – baby, fuck – oh my god,”

“What is it, honey? You not like what I’m doin’?”

Jack’s other hand is wrapped around your midsection, holding you against him.

“No, no baby, I love it. I fucking love it!” you cry out, neither of you caring in the slightest how loud you are.

“Hm,” he hums, mouthing at your neck. “That’s what I thought.”

There’s never been a more beautiful sound than that of Jack’s pleasurable grunts and groans, the punched-out noises making your eyes roll back. You love to hear him, love to hear how fucking aroused he is. And he knows it.

“I’ve been thinkin’ about you all day, sugar. All. Fucking. Day.” he confesses, the hand around your waist retracting and lowering to grab your ass. “You’re my fucking girl, you know that?”

You whimper, nodding your head with closed eyes.

“Let me hear it, sweetheart.” The sudden sting of his hand on your ass causes your eyes to shoot open. “I thought I told you to watch.”

You’re so overwhelmed you completely forgot what he said, swallowing thickly as you try to gain some semblance of your bearings.

“Tell me you’re mine.” He demands, voice incredibly low.

“I’m yours, Jack. I’m yours, I’m always yours.”

“So good, so good, baby girl. You’re so fuckin’ pretty, sugar. Always drawin’ all those eyes, huh? You like that? You like the attention, honey?”

“No,” you whimper. “No, baby. I only want yours.” And it’s true, and he knows it.

It was during your very first sexual encounter that Jack’s possessive side came out, unable to help himself from claiming your beautiful form.

“Mm – fuck.” he groans, choked out gasps punching out from his throat. “Oh, honey, I’m gonna cum. I’m gonna cum, okay? And then I’ll take you home, take you home and lick your pussy, make your pretty pussy cum all over my tongue and fingers. Would you like that, babycakes?”

“God, yes. Please, yes.” you immediately beg, turning your head to the side. “Please let me feel it, baby. Let me feel you cum inside.”

Jack groans, a sound that turns into a growl against your neck. He can feel himself shaking, his muscles working to hold both of you up as he begins to cum. You coax him to his peak, grinding your hips back against him until it forces him off the edge. Shortly after your words, you feel it inside, welcoming the warmth as he paints your inner channel white.

You can feel the muscles in his chest and stomach as they press up behind you, grinding his hips against your ass and forcing himself even deeper inside. His ragged breaths make you sigh, your head tilting slightly as he begins peppering your neck with passionate kisses. He slips his hand out of your dress, both arms wrapping tightly around you, his cock softening and sliding out. His mouth trails up to your cheek, smirking against you.

“C’mon baby,” he murmurs, nose nuzzling into your neck as he feels you relax into his loving hold. “Let’s take you home.”

Thank you for reading <3

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[locked-tomb-shenanigans]

OOOH okay I've got a good one. I want some autistic Harrow content, maybe her getting overstimulated at a party or something like that and Gideon takes care of her <3

I wanna preface this by saying that I myself am not autistic, so huge, huge thank you to the wonderful Nick Hopson and Deklan Baker for reading over this for me and making sure I did alright in portraying the experience! Some of it is based on my own experiences with ADD since there’s overlap, which helped while writing, but I was still worried about messing up and having you two give me feedback was super helpful!

Majority of this is under the cut again because I wrote another 1k thing, so oops.

What can I say, hurt/comfort is just fun to do, and as nervous as I was, I honestly adored writing this :)

Also threw some ADHD Gideon in there, I'm predictable on some fronts, sorry XD

Requests are currently closed while I work on some things for the tIt holiday exchange, but I might open them again in January after I finish the ones l've already gotten (if I have time). CW for pretty severe overstimulation, as per the request, as well as some relatively minor references to Harrow’s canonical struggles with food.

Harrow’s noise cancelling headphones were out of battery. This would not have been a problem had she been back at her and Gideon’s apartment, showering, as she always did on weekdays from 10:25 to 10:35 in the evening. After that, she would prepare food for herself, which was a routine she could absolutely not afford to lose. If she didn’t eat routinely at an hour that made her body remember even when her brain did not, Harrow might go the whole day without eating.

But her headphones were out of battery, and she was not in the shower, which would have already caused her huge levels of discomfort if she hadn’t been at a party. As it was, Ianthe had dragged both of them with her when she’d come to pick up Gideon for this Friday’s “start of the semester”-party. 

The place was positively packed with people, the lights were harsh and shone right in her eyes regardless of which way she turned… and then there was the noise.

Harrow had left the headphones in, hoping they’d still help a little, but it didn’t make enough of a difference. The thumping sound of the stereo was beating right into her skull, and all around them people were shouting and laughing and dancing with clacking heels and heavy boots. Harrow couldn’t tune any of it out, she kept catching snippets of conversations from all sides at once, the noises swelling into a nightmare symphony. 

She wasn’t sure what in the God’s name had possessed her to step onto the dance floor with her girlfriend, but it was just too much. People kept brushing past her, and at some point even pressing her nails into her palms repeatedly (left hand for three seconds, right hand for five, left hand for three again) stopped helping. Her senses were overflowing, and when she looked up again Gideon was gone from her sight, lost among the waves of people dancing around her. It was just too much. 

Harrow felt nauseous and her vision was swimming, tears blurring the people around her into one colorful mass. There were rational thoughts somewhere in her brain, but she couldn’t reach them. The only thing that remained was a sort of animal panic, a quiet, persistent scream of ‘outoutout.’

The act of fighting herself out of the crowd was a blur of noises and lights and hands, and Harrow only briefly came back into herself when she stumbled and became acquainted with the black tile floor.

The voices around her swelled unbearably and someone reached out to touch her. Harrow feared she might scream, but the next snippet she caught was Gideon’s voice. People stepped back. Gideon didn’t touch her. She knew when not to. She just stepped into Harrow’s field of view and waited for her to get up on her own before she walked, purposefully slowly, towards the back door. Harrow scrambled after her, vision swirling so badly that she nearly knocked something over and then bumped against the doorframe.

Gideon stayed calmingly quiet while she accompanied Harrow back to the car. She just walked with her in silence, half a step behind, and did what Harrow only realized later was shielding her from view.

The car’s smells were mild and comforting in their dull familiarity, and Gideon let her sit on the left side of the backseat with all the doors open so she could feel the cold. Gideon left her briefly, returning with a weighted vest and Harrow’s favorite pillow, placing them down next to her before sitting at a respectful distance at the other end of the backseat. Harrow could do nothing but to look at her girlfriend and hope she understood, because no words in any known language would suffice to adequately express her gratitude—and even if there had been words, her throat refused to form any.

There was immediate relief in the vest and the ability to curl around the pillow, nails digging into the smooth fabric (left hand for three seconds, right hand for five, left hand for three again). She pressed her head back into the seat, eyes closed and knees pulled up to her chest and just breathed slowly for a full five minutes. She felt less like she was about to vibrate out of her skin after.

Over the next twenty minutes, she slowly worked herself all the way over to Gideon’s side of the backseat, first barely touching a single finger until she finally buried herself in her girlfriend’s side. Gideon was her safe person, and the only one whose touch she not just tolerated but genuinely enjoyed a lot of the time. But when her senses were already worn so thin, it would just push her even further over the edge. She and Gideon were opposite in that way—when Gideon’s senses were overwhelmed like this, touch was the only thing that helped.

But when Harrow’s senses weren’t all screaming at her at once, this did help her, too. 

“Is it okay if I…” Gideon lifted an arm and trailed off, not making any further movements before Harrow confirmed that it was, in fact, okay. 

“Thank you, Gideon,” Harrow whispered into her girlfriend’s chest, still sniffling quietly, “for thinking ahead and bringing the things I needed even when I didn’t admit I would. And for being here with me when you could be inside with your friends.” She had a terrible desire to apologize, but they had rules for situations like this. If Gideon was forbidden from unproductive self-blaming for situations out of her control, it only made sense that Harrow was, too.

“Are you kidding? Fact aside that I’d be with you regardless, that party was a fucking nightmare. The lights were so bad that my sunglasses barely helped. By all means, thank you for giving me an excuse to leave.” She looked at her for permission, and, once granted, pressed a gentle kiss to Harrow's forehead. “Let’s just stay home next time, okay?”

“Gladly.”

“And Harrow?”

“Yes?”

“Don’t let people drag you into doing things you know are likely to set you off. It’s reasonable to do that. I know I’m one to talk, but I’m working on it, and the point still stands. Your well-being is more important than someone’s desire to hang out with you.”

“And if I just wanted to spend the evening with my girlfriend?” Harrow asked quietly, lacing her trembling fingers through Gideon’s, index finger drumming incessantly against her girlfriend’s second knuckle.

“Then tell her that next time, and maybe you’ll even give her a decent excuse to skip out on something she’s only choosing to go to because of peer pressure.” She smiled down at Harrow. “Let’s go home, yeah? Unless you still need a moment, of course. No rush.”

“I should be alright, so long as I’m not forced to drive,” Harrow said dryly, both of them well aware that she didn’t even have a license to begin with. She buried her head in Gideon’s chest, just for another moment.

“No way in hell am I letting you drive my car, Nonagesimus.” Gideon chuckled lightly. “You should probably also eat something when we get home. How’s mashed potatoes sound?”

Harrow lit up immediately. Mush food was her favorite, especially when it was so mushed that it barely had any texture and didn’t require her to chew, just swallow. It was inarguably better than soup—though soup was also an acceptable choice on most occasions—because of the just perfectly comfortable amount of stimulation the mashed potatoes provided in their slight solidity. Harrow enjoyed the feeling of moving the mass around in her mouth, liked the feel of it against her cheeks.

Gideon always made the mashed potatoes unseasoned, and didn’t serve the food until it was lukewarm, and like that, it was as good as any comfort food got.

“Please know that you are my favorite person in the vasts of the universe.”

“I do,” Gideon said, and looked like she might cry. Her free hand flapped against her thigh, like it always happened when Gideon was happy. “But I’ll never get sick of hearing it. And I’m not gonna say it as weirdly as you just did, but I love you, too, Gloom Princess.”

Harrow knew she would marry her, then.

[handsomeamoeba]

Alright, two of these polls timed out, it's go time. Stories and the correct answer under the cut

potentially psychically attacked my best friend during a fire drill TRUE

Okay bear with me here.

It was freshman year of college and I was living in the dorms. As those who have lived in a dorm are probably familiar with, the fire alarm went off at like 3 AM (I think someone burned a bag of popcorn or something). I was very disoriented so I just kind of stumbled out in my bathrobe with no shoes.

The problem with this was that it was January, and about 5 degrees outside.

I looked around for my bestie so I could complain about my self-inflicted state, but i couldn't locate her. That's about when I realized that she was probably at her then-boyfriend's house snug and warm in bed.

We were outside for about an hour, waiting for the fire department to sweep the whole building, before they thought "hey maybe we should send these guys to the other dorm building to warm up." I staggered down the freezing pavement wearing my other friend's gloves on my feet. When we got to the other dorm I grabbed my bestie's roommate and said, "I know where she is, and when I see her, I'm gonna kill her."

AT THIS VERY MOMENT, my bestie snaps wide awake from a deep sleep for reasons unknown to her. She figures as long as she's awake she might as well go use the bathroom. When she returns from the restroom, she is shaking uncontrollably. After climbing into bed, her trembling wakes her boyfriend, who rolls over and touches her and asks her "what the fuck, did you go outside?" because she is so cold to the touch.

The next day we exchanged notes and put two and two together.

---

came out as trans because of the McElroys TRUE

Look I just realized I liked referring to myself as "boy" at a certain point. And then an episode of Travis & Theresa McElroy's "Shmanners" where they talked about gender-neutral honorifics sealed the deal.

---

teacher challenged us to climb up a greased up poll for money TRUE

Okay. Okay. So when we used to do Field Days in school (for those who aren't familiar, a Field Day is a day when your school or other organization just goes out and does outdoor recreational activities for a day) there was a game we'd play where our teacher would slick the tetherball poll in vaseline and challenge us kids to try to climb it to get a $10 bill stuck to the top. It never worked but boy we'd try.

I brought this up to several people recently and apparently nobody else ever fucking did this?

I went to an unlicensed Montessori school if that makes a difference.

---

sold a classmate into slavery TRUE

Uh. So this one. Is even weirder than it sounds. And it involves a game of Monopoly.

When I was in high school I took an elective course in sociology for a semester, taught by a teacher we'll call Mr. N. He was a strange and charismatic man. Once he challenged us to spend 24 hours in isolation and write a paper about it. But by far the most memorable thing he ever did was have us play Monopoly.

The game lasted... I wanna say about a week, week and a half of in-class time. At the start of the game he laid a few ground rules:

At any time, the teams can merge following a vote.

At any time, the teams can split following a vote.

For a nominal monopoly money fee, Mr. N would pass private correspondence between teams for us.

For a starting bonus, we could pick a "company" name and bring in our own playing piece.

The winning team would receive a pizza party. The rest would not receive anything.

Our team was named Fantastic Cactus, and we had a small live cactus as our playing piece.

It did not take long for the game to go completely off the rails. We would conspire and plan outside of class time. Our opponents became enemies. Mr. N egged us on, starting to offer deals. He would offer to buy possessions off us-- little things at first, like pencils and erasers-- for more Monopoly money for our team. He would then auction them off to our classmates for real money (which went towards the scholarship fund he ran).

At one point one of our teammates suggested we were becoming too ruthless. We voted her out of the team, forcing her to become an independent company that we then immediately drove into bankruptcy.

I sold the shoes off my feet to Mr. N.

Eventually one smaller team approached us for a merger, and we voted to agree to buy them out and have them join our team.

Which is when we decided to sell one of them into slavery to Mr. N.

We almost didn't do it! Not because we had ethical qualms about it though, but because one of the stipulations was that he had to be on time to class every day, and we didn't trust him to do it.

Another classmate became so stressed about the game that it exacerbated her ulcers, and she was excused from the game and allowed pizza on the condition that she act as Mr. N's assistant.

Anyway, Fantastic Cactus won.

And as we're enjoying our pizza party and gloating at the end of the game, Mr. N stands up in front of the class and says this:

"You know, at the beginning of this game, I told you at any time, teams could merge. If at the beginning of the game you had told me, 'Mr. N, we all want to merge so we can all have pizza,' you could have done that. But you didn't, because that would be communism, and you have been trained by a capitalist society to compete."

Anyway, I'm a borderline communist now.

---

incited a flag burning as a child TRUE

So, my elementary school (you know, the one with the greased poll) used to do these parties before every Thanksgiving break where we'd make a Thanksgiving lunch from scratch in the way people from a chosen historical period would have done it. I'm talking down to churning butter and everything. There's a whole separate story about just that process, but that's not what we're here to talk about.

One year the theme was American Revolution. After lunch, as a fun little activity, our teacher (the one who greased up the poll) had us stage a mock Boston Tea Party. A few of us were sent out in a tiny boat onto the pond behind the school to throw boxes of shredded leaves into the water while all 20-something of us chanted "NO TAXATION WITHOUT REPRESENTATION."

This managed to whip this group of 6-12 year olds into an insane patriotic frenzy. It got to the point where, in the revolutionary spirit of the afternoon, I quickly drew a union jack and brought it out and we, completely unsupervised, threw the flag onto the campfire and cheered and screamed. (It was the 90s, nobody cared about kids being unsupervised around fire I guess).

One of our teachers, who was an English emigrant, had to go home early.

Another had to sit us down and give us a talking-to about flag burnings.

It was not, incidentally, the teacher who had got us all stirred up in the first place.

---

spent a period of my life deeply threatened by the number 5 FALSE

It was the number 7, actually. I don't know what to tell you, I have psychotic depression and was convinced I was seeing omens.

Do you know how fucking often a number shows up when you're scared of it? It's a lot.

---

was interrogated for writing a satirical article about my high school TRUE

For shits and giggles as a teen, during a study period, I wrote a list "100 Ways You Know You Go to [School]". I'm not entirely proud of some of the items that were on that list, there was some kind of ableist shit in there but I was like 16 and an asshole, I had a lot of learning ahead of me in life. But other list items included such incendiary claims as accusing two of our teachers of having an affair, another that one of our chemistry teachers smoked crack in the closet between classes, yet another that a teacher had so many botox treatments she no longer experienced emotions, and that dogs were openly mating in the parking lot. A lot of these things were common memes and inside jokes among the students.

I shared the list with a few friends and classmates who unbeknownst to me made photocopies. And then they made photocopies. And suddenly the list was everywhere.

Eventually I am pulled out of Photography and brought to a private room by the dean of students and asked if I know anything about The List. Apparently I am a suspect because the list is "well written," and I am told that nobody is going to be "in trouble," they just "want to know."

On the one hand I am flattered because it was just a listicle and I didn't think it was that good. On the other, I am fucking offended because how stupid do they think I am? "Nobody's going to get in trouble?" Then why are you pulling me out of class to interrogate me alone?

So I put on my best Innocent Model Student face and tell her, "I have no idea, Mrs. K! You know I'm always out of the loop on these things. I mean, I've seen it. But I couldn't say who wrote it." We'd had a good relationship up until that point, so she believed me and sent me on my merry.

I never trusted her again. Then again, I should've stopped trusting her when I took her health class and she told us the Orange Juice LSD Urban Legend like it was something that had happened to one of her students personally.

---

hurt Rob Thomas' feelings by not believing in him enough TRUE

So in high school when other kids were listening to... what the fuck did kids listen to in 2004? Usher? Anyway, I was having a Matchbox Twenty phase.

I was active on their official forums. On the forums, you needed to register an account to post and nobody could register one of the band members' names for their account so no one could impersonate them. They would make an occasional post. Actually, former rhythm guitarist Adam Gaynor would post rather frequently and we called him "Uncle Adam" which in retrospect is fucking weird. But also besides the point.

There was also an official live chatroom, but you didn't need an account to use the live chat, you could just choose a name and start chatting. I didn't use it often, I preferred the forums, but sometimes the chat was chaotic and fun. At any rate, one day a guy shows up claiming to be Rob Thomas and says he'll do a Q&A. Obviously we do not believe him. We know how the Internet works. He tries to get us to do a Q&A with him for about a half hour until we bully this troll out of the room.

Which is when actual fucking Rob Thomas himself posts on the forum with his official account to say how hurt and offended he was that nobody would listen to him in the live chatroom. And then we had to explain to this fucking Gen Xer that people tell lies online.

---

dad pulled my baby teeth w/ a paper towel hand puppet named after a Nazi scientist TRUE

Okay this is admittedly in somewhat poor taste.

I had issues getting my loose teeth out as a child, so I often recruited the assistance of my dad to dislodge them for the purposes of extorting the tooth fairy for cash.

This help came in the form of a paper towel hand puppet who was a cackling mad scientist threatening to experiment on my teeth. The goal was to get me to laugh and distract me from how scared I was that losing my teeth was gonna hurt.

Except the hand puppet's name was. Dr. Mengele.

Imagine my fucking surprise when we were watching the History Channel one day and I learned who Dr. Mengele was.

The bit persisted though until all my baby teeth were gone.

Some years later, my mother, who has never known the appropriate moment to tell a story to save her life, told the story of the Dr. Mengele puppet to my orthodontist.

Dr. Schwartz.

And do you know what, he didn't find it funny?

---

buried a toad alive because it was ugly TRUE

Oh god okay christ.

I was 8. I think.

In my childhood I held a lot of funerals for wild animals. It was the way of kids who grew up in the woods. There was a little graveyard beside the school where we buried a variety of frogs and snakes and squirrels and bugs and even a mole at one point.

Well one day me and my bestie found a toad in the pond, and this bad boy was so super warty. He had lumps and bumps everywhere. Just a lumpy, bumpy guy.

We were convinced he had cancer. And was actively dying.

Well, what was there to be done?

Obviously we had to bury the poor thing.

So we committed him to the animal graveyard, going so far as to bury him under stones and everything.

I'd like to imagine he dug his way out eventually. But probably not.

I'm gonna do 3 of these polls because I thought of a LOT of things, check my blog for the others. Each poll contains one item that is ALMOST but NOT QUITE true. Which one is it?

I can elaborate when the polls are done if people are interested.

[highwaytothedangerzone502]

India Lima Yankee - Chapter 26

Pairing: Rooster x Female OC

Word Count: 2841

Warnings: Mention of death, angst

Summary: Juliette Kazansky discovers Maverick is back in town for a special training detachment, but she's more than a little blindsided when Rooster arrives too. Having not spoken to him for almost ten years after their less than amicable break-up, Juliette can only imagine how the next few weeks are going to play out when she remains head over heels in love with him while he wants nothing to do with Juliette other than to forget her.

Or so she thinks.

Notes: Chapters in italics are flashbacks.

Chapter Songs: Wherever You Will Go As Long As You Love Me

Chapters: Chp 1 Chp 2 Chp 3 Chp 4 Chp 5 Chp 6 Chp 7 Chp 8 Chp 9 Chp 10 Chp 11 Chp 12 Chp 13 Chp 14 Chp 15 Chp 16 Chp 17 Chp 18 Chp 19 Chp 20 Chp 21 Chp 22 Chp 23 Chp 24 Chp 25 Chp 26

Rooster

He'd only been in the bathroom for a few minutes, carefully removing his service uniform and switching into sweats, a tee, and his ever-present Hawaiian shirt. He never would've guessed that in the short span of time he'd separated himself from Juliette, she would discover the piece of her he'd never let go of.

Rooster exited the bathroom, his Navy blues draped neatly over his arm, when he saw Juliette on the floor, leaning against his bed and staring at an all too familiar locket. He felt the color drain out of his face. He'd planned on telling her, on giving it to her when the moment was right, but that notion flew out the window faster than Mach 10 at the sight before him.

Abort! Abort! Abort! Rooster's head yelled at him to turn around and return to his bathroom like he hadn't seen anything, had forgotten something, but he'd already been standing there too long for him not to have recognized what she held.

Hesitantly, Rooster approached Juliette, setting his uniform on the bed and sinking to the ground beside her. He tried to think of what to say, where to begin on why he still had this sentimental necklace of hers, but any and all words caught in his throat. It was one thing for her to know he still loved her after all this time, but for Juliette to find the necklace in his possession, the one that had been there since day one of their relationship, was another. It signified both the beginning and the end of their love, a love that had never died, only been buried.

Rooster watched her slowly slip her nail between the edges of the locket and flick it open. The two pictures inside, a little worn from age but clearly visible, still remained. Her thumb trailed over the photo of her dad and Maverick, then over the one of her and Bradley, before she clicked it shut and turned it over. Juliette stared at the engraving on the back for what felt like an hour before finally looking up at him, perplexity clear on her face. "You still have this?"

He dropped his gaze from hers, keeping his eyes trained on the locket. "Yeah. I planned on giving it to you yesterday, but everything happened, and I figured I'd wait for a different time."

"Why do you still have it, though? It's been almost ten years."

"I didn't know I had it for about three of those."

Juliette tilted her head. "I sent it a week after you left. How could you not have known?"

"Just because you sent it doesn't mean I opened it," Rooster said, continuing to keep his eyes anywhere but on her. "When I got the box of my belongings, I was still pretty upset over what happened between us, and I couldn't bring myself to open it before my deployment, so I didn't. When I came back, I don't know... I still didn't want to open it. I didn't want to open the box that contained a part of my life I'd thrown away over the one and only nasty argument we ever had."

"And the next two years it stayed closed?"

"Same reason. It only got opened when an ex-girlfriend found it stashed away in my closet while we were doing some spring cleaning. Needless to say, she wasn't too happy I'd held onto it for so long, nor did she like seeing the necklace and got mad at me for never getting her something so sentimental. We didn't last long after that." Rooster reached over and stroked Lightning on the head, who had come to lay beside him. The dog provided a welcome distraction from the mortification the aviator felt trying to explain what he was. "I wanted to send it back to you, but I figured you wouldn't want anything to do with me or it since you'd sent it back along with every other gift I'd given you and the pictures of us. I couldn't bring myself to get rid of it either. To be honest, I couldn't bring myself to get rid of any of it. It's all in storage. You know I have trouble letting go of things, the good and the bad. And you... you were the best."

God, Bradley just needed her to stop staring at him, to have the weight of her gaze lifted off him because the guilt burdening him at the moment was bad enough. Naturally, Juliette didn't. She'd never been one to back down when she had questions, and right now, she probably had a million of them. 

"You told me you weren't coming back," she pointed out, causing the heart-wrenching memory to resurface in Bradley's mind. He vividly remembered sending that text to her with shaking hands. He hadn't meant it, but his rage had gotten the better of him, along with his fear. "But yet, you've made it clear that you wanted to, that you thought about it. You've held onto this-" Juliette held up the locket- "onto us, all this time. You're not telling me something, Bradley. I know you're not. What held you back? It wasn't your hurt ego and pride."

"I got scared," he confessed, finally forcing himself to lock eyes with her. "About a week before our fight, an acquaintance of mine died in a training accident. His plane had a mechanical malfunction, and he went down. I didn't see it, but I saw his wife after she'd been told the news and the look on her face... I can't describe the despair. I never told you about that death because I knew you were upset about me leaving, as much as you supported me being in the Navy. I didn't want to add to your worry, so I kept quiet about it. Fast-forward to after our fight, when I calmed down, all I could see was the look on your face when I left, and it killed me because it was so dangerously close to what that wife wore, and that was just because of me walking out. If I died while being with you... the idea of putting you through that made me panic. I'd rather you hate me than ever put you through that kind of misery. I realize now that wasn't my call to make. You wouldn't have stayed with me if you didn't want to deal with that possibility, but seeing that woman after her husband died and seeing what my dad's death did to Mom, I just... I panicked, Jules."

"Did you really think I could ever hate you?" Juliette inquired softly. 

"After what happened? Yeah. And then you showed at my Top Gun graduation, and I could barely tear my eyes from you, but you... you wouldn't even look at me."

Juliette shook her head. "It's not because I hated you. It's because I felt guilty. I still blamed myself for what happened between us, and I knew you could've had that Top Gun trophy a lot sooner had Maverick and I not held you back."

"You didn't hold me back, Jules, and I am so sorry for ever making you think that you did," Rooster said, brushing a piece of hair out of her face. "I'm sorry for leaving you and for staying away, and I'm sorry for making you feel the way I did all this time. God knows I loved you back then and that I still love you."

"Rooster-"

"The locket is yours to keep if you want it. It will always be yours and no one else's. If you don't want it, you can get rid of it. Or I can if you don't want the trouble."

"Bradley-"

"If you don't want me to stay the night after all this, I get it," he continued, standing up to place some distance between himself and Juliette before she most likely broke what was left of his heart. Why would she want the necklace? Why would she still love him in the way he wanted her to? Sure, they'd fallen into their old habits of confiding in each other, of supporting one another when things got tough, of showing those little acts of genuine affection, and yes, they'd kissed more than once and shared flirty remarks, but who was to say Juliette wanted a relationship after the way he ended things with her last time? Just because she still loved him didn't mean she wanted to be with him again. "I can reach out to Maverick, have him give you a ride home."

Juliette stood up. "Bradley, would you please-"

A knock on his door interrupted both of them. He swiftly moved to open it, anything to have a change in conversation, willing to talk to anyone, even Hangman. Still, thankfully, it wasn't his rival at the door but Phoenix and Bob.

"Hey," Phoenix said, leaning against the doorframe. "The others and I are watching a movie in the break room. Thought you'd like to join."

Bradley's brain short-circuited for an answer. Part of him wanted to say he couldn't because he was driving Juliette home, but would she even still want him to after their conversation? Would she want to be around him at all?

"Hey, Juliette," Phoenix said, her gaze shifting to behind Rooster. "I know you're probably exhausted from today, but you're welcome to join too."

"I'm surprised you two aren't exhausted as well," Jules replied, coming to stand beside Bradley. He glanced down at her, attempting to act as naturally as he could to avoid Phoenix and Bob figuring out the two of them had been having an awkward conversation. "I meant to ask you earlier, and I'm so sorry for just now asking this, but are you two doing okay? No injuries from yesterday?"

"Yeah, we're fine. And don't apologize for not asking," Phoenix assured, smiling appreciatively. "You've had a hell of a past twenty-four hours."

"Are y'all coming?" Hangman shouted from down the hallway.

Phoenix rolled her eyes. "Hold your horses, Bagman! We'll be there in a sec!" She turned to Jules and Rooster. "You two joining?"

"I'll, uh, I'll leave that up to Juliette," Bradley said, rubbing the back of his neck while glancing down at his ex. He wanted to give her an escape if she wanted one. 

Jules smiled up at him, resting her hand on his bicep. "Yeah, we'll join. Just give us a few minutes, would you?"

"Cool. We'll see you there." Phoenix and Bob departed, and Rooster shut the door, trying to ignore the electric surges traveling up and down his arm from Juliette's touch. God, he wished they could've left with his friends so he wouldn't have to hear the inevitable denial of his wishes, even if he did deserve them. 

"If you want to change out of your clothes," Rooster began, slipping out of her grasp and hoping the sudden change of topic would make her ignore what they'd previously been discussing, "I can go find some spares for you, or you can wear some of my clothes. They might be a little big on you, but-"

"Bradley, stop. I know what you're doing," Juliette interrupted, closing the distance he'd placed between them. "Don't deflect."

"I'm not- I don't-" Rooster ran a hand through his hair, taking a deep breath. "Today was about your dad, and you should be grieving him, not dealing with my bullshit."

"Yeah, well, it's not just your bullshit. It's mine, too, because we both had a part in our falling out. I'd rather figure us out than have to think about earlier because I have all the time in the world to grieve my dad because we both know the grief never leaves, no matter how much time passes. You get used to it, but that's it. With you, I don't know how much time I have left because you're probably going on a death mission, and I don't want to be questioning what was between us if I lose you. So talk to me, Bradley. Tell me what you want."

"I want to be with you again, Juliette," Rooster said quietly, swallowing the hope she might want the same thing he did. He couldn't allow himself to have his dreams broken like that, not again. Besides, the frustration in her voice more than gave him his answer, but he still needed to hear her say it to be sure. "But I understand if you don't want the same thing."

Her sapphire eyes pierced his as if searching for some unspoken words he was holding back from her like the last few times they'd verged into this territory, but Bradley had bared the rest of his soul to her tonight, and if she chose not to try again, he would respect her wishes. He would rather have Jules in his life as a friend than not at all. 

Rooster watched as she reached down and grabbed hold of his hand. Lifting it, Juliette placed the locket in his open palm, and Rooster's shoulders sagged. He'd been right, and God, crashing into the ground in a ball of fire would've been less agonizing than this.

Juliette turned around, but rather than walking away, she lifted her wavy blonde hair up, revealing her neck to him. It took a moment for Rooster's brain to register what she was silently asking him to do, but the second it did, he swiftly draped the locket around her neck before the opportunity disappeared. 

"Everything that's happened is water under the bridge, okay?" Juliette said, facing him, the locket resting snugly on her chest where it always belonged. "Neither of us will hold what we did against each other. It'll be a clean slate for both of us and-"

Rooster couldn't contain himself anymore. He cupped her face and crashed his lips onto hers. All the other kisses they'd shared, he'd held back in fear of revealing too much about his feelings, even the one from yesterday, but Bradley couldn't help it now. He poured all the love and longing and lost time into this kiss. Juliette returned it with a voraciousness of her own, snaking her arms around his neck and pressing her body into his, closing any remaining distance between them that she could. He wrapped one arm around her waist and used his free hand to weave his fingers in her hair and keep her head firmly where it was. Rooster wanted nothing more than to lose himself in Juliette like he used to because she had this ability, whether she knew it or not, to make all his worries disappear just by pressing her lips to his. Bradley wanted to lay her on the bed and reacquaint himself with her body and the softness of its curves, to leave his mark on her on places only she could see.

He just might've had Hangman not banged loudly on the door and shouted, "You two coming or not?"

"I'm gonna kill him," Rooster murmured against Juliette's lips. 

"Hang on!" Juliette yelled, bracing her forehead against Bradley's. Then, lowering her voice, she added, "We did say we'd go."

"I hate that we agreed to it, but if we don't, we'll never hear the end of it."

"Can I take you up on wearing some of your clothes? I'd really like to get out of this dress."

"You know I always loved seeing you in my clothes." Rooster kissed her once more, then tore himself away from her and opened his dresser. He pulled out some attire he thought would be the best fit. Juliette took them from him and slipped into the bathroom to change. Within thirty seconds, she returned. Rooster smiled at the sight of her in the oversized tee, and the too-large sweatpants rolled up so she wouldn't trip on them, the drawstrings pulled as tight as they could go to keep them up.

They headed towards his door, but before his hand touched the handle, she stopped him and said, "Hey, I know you probably won't like this, but let's keep us a secret until the mission's over. If you go on it, I don't want the others thinking I convinced Maverick to send you out of favoritism. I mean, Phoenix, Bob, and Hangman can know because I'm pretty sure they all suspect it anyway, but not the others. People tend to act weird when coworkers date."

"We can just tell them we're old acquaintances for now," Rooster teased, slipping his arm around her waist. 

Juliette laughed. "You're never going to let me live that one down, are you?"

"No. Also, before we go-" Rooster bent down and kissed just below her left ear, a place he knew was one of her weak points. It elicited a small noise of pleasure from her. Grinning, he whispered, "India-" he kissed the spot below her right ear- "Lima-" he kissed her lips- "Yankee."

***

Tags: @lgg5989 @shanimallina87 @polikszena @summ3rlotus @souslesyeuxde @gleasonmalfoy @icemansgirl1999 @supernaturaldawning @thedarkinmansfield @lyannaforpresident @lapilark @getmyprettynameoutofyourmouth @simpofthecentury @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @shadeops21 @double-j

[imjeralee]

i request that you drink plenty of water and take care of yourself !!! ·o·b after thats done, came i pretty please get headcanons with link, Kaeya and maybe Childe about an s/o who draws them one day as a confession and gives it to them? :) (maybe they already knew and saw them drawing them before ? who knows) thank you in advance!!

Thank you anon! *looks at cup of green tea beside laptop* yep I think i’m doing well in keeping myself hydrated recently hehe but thank you :3

Anyway please see below for the ask! (it’s pretty long)

Link

He was grooming one of the ponies when he saw you standing behind a tent peeking at him curiously and when he turned round properly, you quickly scampered away and he got worried so he followed you to the room you share to see you sitting on the bed with a wine red book propped up in your lap but upon his return, you immediately hid it behind your back, smiling widely at him

He wonders what it was but decides not to pry, but he later discovers it was actually a sketchbook when he’s packing up for tomorrow and you’re taking a bath and the sketchbook drops out of your pack and onto the floor, opening at a random page

He picks it up with the intention to return it to your bag but then he sees the various drawings of him in his Ancient Armour set, Hylian and Snowquill set. They’re fully coloured and it looks like you’ve spent hours on them. He didn’t know you were this artistic and wondered why you hid this from him

The date you wrote on the bottom of the page indicates that you drew all this in one day! He’s super impressed

Then he sees the note you wrote below: “To my Dearest Link, I hope you like my drawings of you. All I can think about is how lucky I am to be able to be by your side, you’ve changed my life for the better and-”

Obv half complete so now he knows why you didn’t want to show him and he respects your privacy, so he puts the sketchbook away 

Outside, he sees Beedle and goes over to see what’s new for sale. Beedle has some cool art stuff (well, it’s more like stuff that can be used for dye but can also be used as paint) so he buys some for you as a present which he will give to you later.

Next day, you get chased by a group of Bokogoblins and the book and all your drawing supplies drops out from your bag. 

You didn’t see it drop and returned to the stable, ransacking your bag like crazy only to find your stuff missing

When you realise everything must have dropped out when you got chased, you quickly leave the stable to go back to the area but it’s thunder and lightning so Link chases after you

“Link, what are you doing? Go back, the weather’s awful.” You tell him but he shakes his head, unable to leave you alone in the rain like this

He helps you with your search and you end up locating your book and your supplies which are lying in the mud

The book has been trampled over and some of the pages have been torn out. The remaining pages are soaked with dirt and grime. Your pencils are snapped in half and your paints have been left to bleed all over the grass. All of your drawings are ruined, too. This is your worst nightmare.

Link observes you silently as tears begins to form in your eyes and you look at him, sniffling slightly.

You’re experiencing a mixture of devastation, frustration, anger and exasperation - from your carelessness to the stupid bokogoblins - and this incident infuriates you so much you throw the book to the ground angrily

Before you can march away, Link grabs your wrist 

Turning round, your gazes meet and he looks at you softly, intently.

‘What’s wrong?’ he is saying. 

“I was going to use those to confess to you!” you end up roaring out by accident. 

Link looks at you, a little stunned

“N-Never mind! Everything’s ruined!!!!” 

You’re about to storm off again when Link suddenly pulls you into his chest and gives you a hug

“!” you’re so shocked you can’t speak

He pulls away though, and leads you to the hollow of a nearby tree trunk where he gestures for you to sit down to shelter from the rain whilst he glances around, then sprints back over to where the ruined sketchbook is

He picks it up and holds it against his chest as if it’s dear to him. That’s not all, you watch as he begins to pick up the remaining pages that were torn out and once he’s collected them all he returns to you, clutching the pages tightly

"Link...” you murmur breathlessly as he he kneels down in front of you before he fishes around in his pockets to reveal a random bunch of paint pots in his hand.

You’re a little confused, but realise he has some spares which he must have bought from a merchant

it’s not much but...

he nudges it to you for your offering

You gawp at him for a few moments before you smile and chuckle and upon seeing you back to your usual self again, Link smiles and helps you back onto your own feet to stand

You thank him as you cradle the paints to yourself. You will need to restart from scratch from somehow it feels ok and something tells you you don’t need to hide it from him anymore

And you return to the stable, sheltering from the rain by sharing a large leaf together

Kaeya

Let’s begin with the fact that alongside you, there is a maid who also likes Kaeya as much as you do and she’s a bit of a sneaky bugger and you don’t show your drawings to anyone or watermark your artwork until they’re complete. You can probably see where this is going

One day, Kaeya finds out you are drawing a picture of him when he comes to your office to inform you that there’s a group of abyss mages outside Mondstadt so you hurry off to dispatch it and leaving Kaeya in your office

He accidentally comes across your drawing when he sees his face on a piece of parchment and his interest is piqued so he heads over to check it out

It’s a really good sketch!!! the amount of detail is insane! he had no idea you possessed such skill and who knew that you could create such beautiful art like this? He also finds some rough doodles and sketches you made earlier on some scrap paper you had also written on so he knows it’s you

Anyway, he puts everything back to join you in battle, but not before passing a maid along the way who is heading to your room to clean up

She comes across your drawing and she’s always fancied Kaeya herself, so for some reason other than just thinking she might be able to get away with it if she’s sneaky enough, she takes your drawing and sets off with it

Meanwhile, you return to your room after the battle, take off your coat and sit comfortably in your chair, reaching for your quill

“Ah, time to get back to my drawing of Kaeya.” you say with a smile, looking at your desk.

Wait a minute.

Something is wrong.

Very wrong.

It’s GONE!

After checking the rest of your office (and its clearly not there), you rush outside, wondering what happened to it when you see Kaeya and a maid talking in the corridor

they didn’t see you, so you quickly hide

“Please accept this, captain Kaeya!” gushes the maid, presenting your drawing to him. “I drew this picture of you to show how much you mean to me.”

What in the Samachurl shit is this? 

You’re about to storm over when Kaeya takes the drawing with a delicate brow raised, studies it intently and goes, “Oh? But I’m not so sure about that.”

“W-what do you mean, Captain Kaeya?”

“There’s no watermark on it,” he points out, “....one could’ve taken anyone’s artwork and claim that it’s theirs.”

“T-That’s - ! Ah, Captain Kaeya, h-how could you think so lowly of me?”

“I’m only just stating some simple facts, that’s all. You won’t hold that against me, will you? And I’m certainly not accusing you of anything...unless you...?”

“Oh....uh....I...I-I’m so sorry, Captain Kaeya, you’re right! I-I....please excuse me!”

The maid’s too embarrassed to proceed any further and leaves, running away.

Indeed, what in the samachurl hell had just happened? 

It goes quiet and you wonder if he’s still there; you step out of your hiding place only to go nose-to-chest with Kaeya.

He greets you with a smirk. “if it isn’t the little kitten, what are you doing here?”

“Um...uh, I....that....that drawing - “

What he said is right, there’s no watermark. How can you prove it’s yours? Would he believe you if you told him?

“Hm? Ah, yes, this drawing. I was going to keep it for myself.”

“No, wait! I mean...er...it’s not finished yet-”

“So you drew this then?”

“Yes, I did. it was me.” Though you wonder if he would believe you after everything you had just heard.

“Why?”

You lamely tell him you really like him and wanted to use it to confess to him.

He watches you for a few seconds, then hands the drawing to you. “I’ll wait until you’ve finished then.”

“Huh?” You gasp. He gave it back to you so easily despite what he said to the maid! “You...you’re not-”

“I knew it was you who drew it. I recognised your style.”

“Then why didn’t you say so earlier?”

“If I said so earlier, how else would I get you to confess to me?”

“KAEYA!!!”

(from then on he’ll want you to draw him more often)

Childe

Saw you sitting on the grassy hill near Qingxu Pool drawing earlier and because he is good at sneaking up on people, you didn’t hear him as he casually leaned over to peek over your shoulder and said, “Hey girlie, what’re you up to?”

You’re like “UWAGH!” and quickly close your sketchbook before turning round to see Childe.

“N-nothing!” you exclaim, before you get up and run down the hill, leaving a very amused Childe on his own

Later, when you’ve finished your masterpiece, you nervously approach Childe and tell him, “Um....this is for you, let me know what you think.” before rushing off in a blushing mess and Childe will open the sketchbook to see that you’ve drawn a very nice portrait of him in a battle stance, wielding his bow, surrounded by his hydro blades

Childe stands, staring at the picture

Then he sees the words ‘do you like me?’ scribbled at the very bottom

Childe staring hard now

He’s used to giving people gifts but now that he’s received something so thoughtful, he’s a bit overwhelmed. he can tell you put so much effort and hardwork into this. Ah, what is this feeling? 

He closes the book without further ado and scrubs a hand over his face

he actually wasn’t expecting you to do this. he knew you were drawing him but the result is really....something else

You don’t hear him from Childe in a few days and you are so nervous and worried.

Is this a rejection? Maybe he didn’t like your picture after all...

You’re walking in the streets and sigh and sit on the stone steps of Liyue, staring at the sea, upset and dejected

But then you hear a whistle from behind and throw a glance over your shoulder to see Childe standing on a higher step, a hand in his pocket

“Hey girlie, heads up,” he tosses a paper plane into the air which makes this little loop before you stand to catch it

Looking up, Childe has gone

You unfold the paper plane to its proper size to reveal that Childe’s drawn a little sketch of you in return and he has written: ‘Yes I do’.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hi Steph! reading your blog has become a sort of guilty pleasure for me. Thanks for everything, it’s so clear that you put a lot of time and energy into your content. I was wondering if you have any johnlock fics that feature a particularly well-written or memorable original character? I always love to see how authors integrate their own character creations into johnlock stories!

Hey Nonny!

Ahhhh!! This is a GREAT request, because I like well-written OC’s in fics, so yeah, this is a great list to make. Here’s what I recall from my bookmarks. Please add your own faves, friends!

MEMORABLE ORIGINAL CHARACTERS

Ex by Itsallfine (T, 1,248 w., 1 Ch. || Angsty Fluff, Love Confessions, Coming Out, Exes, First Kiss, Fake Relationship, Getting Outed) – One night, in the midst of their post-case high and on the cusp of something more, John and Sherlock run into John’s ex. His ex-boyfriend.

The Prize We Sought Is Won by deathfrisbees (E, 4,610 w., 1 Ch. || First Time, Mild D/S, Oral, Military Kink, Bottomlock) – Sherlock's in love, or in lust, or both--unfortunately, the object of his affections is not only his completely oblivious flatmate, but said flatmate would probably run screaming into the hills should he find out. John's been invited to a wedding--unfortunately, the groom used to serve under him back in Afghanistan, and requests that John wear a uniform he's honestly not sure he fits into. Unfortunately for both flatmates, Sherlock's got a military kink the size of Kandahar and John wants to know if he actually can fit into this uniform or if his eyes are deceiving him. It goes from there.

Time on my hands by Mildredandbobbin (M, 7,179 w., 1 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post-S3, One Night Stands, Mutual Pining, Virgin Sherlock, First Time, Sexual Exploration / Discovery, Desperation, Body Worship) – Virginity’s a construct, a concept—what does losing one’s virginity entail for a gay man anyway? Sherlock wants to fill that particular gap in his knowledge but John won’t, can’t, never will assist and there’s only so much desperately unspoken pining even Sherlock can take.

High and Tight, Soft and Loose by cwb (E, 7,429 w., 1 Ch. || Jealous John, Miscommunications / Misunderstandings, First Kiss / Time, BAMF John, Insecure Sherlock, Clueless Sherlock, POV John, Embarrassed John, Adorable Sherlock, Junk Size, UST / RST) – John pressed the knuckle of his index finger against his mouth and sighed. “So, you're coiled like a spring and ready to be ... sprung?” “If you want to be pedestrian about it, yes.” “Like I said, you should do something about that.” “And like I said, pedestrian. What would you have me do? Take up jogging? Yoga? Oh! Unless you mean –” “I don't mean anything. Let’s drop it.”

Matters of National Security by mistyzeo (E, 8,465 w., 1 Ch. || BAMF John, Doctor John, Jealous Sherlock, Dating, Bisexuality, Arguing, Stupidity, Teasing, First Kiss/Time, Hand Jobs, Frottage, RST, Idiots in Love) – John starts dating a male client of Sherlock's, and Sherlock can't figure out why he's so incensed about it.

High Tide by stardust_made (T, 8,540 w., 1 Ch. || Jealousy, Angst, First Kiss) – A little favour Sherlock stupidly agrees to do for Mycroft leads to John meeting a handsome, affluent man, who is going out of his way to woo him. Sherlock struggles with the situation and with his own reactions to it. Part 1 of The High Tide Series

Iris by slashscribe (E, 11,948 w., 1 Ch. || Parentlock, Pining Sherlock, Post-S3) – Sherlock does his best to make John happy when John comes back to 221B with his new baby after the events of Season 3, but Sherlock has a track record of getting things wrong in this area. This story is an exploration of their gradual shift from friends to lovers, told from Sherlock's perspective, full of a lot of pining and lack of emotional awareness.

A Brand of Gold by aquabelacqua (M, 12,757 w., 1 Ch. || Mutual Pining, POV John, Phone Sex, Texting, Masturbation, Long Distance, Drunk Texting) – What am I doing? he wondered. The answer came back at once: Flirting. He let the vital, missing piece snap into place as surely and as cleanly as if it had always been there. He was flirting with Sherlock Holmes.

Twelfth Night by yourdykeinshiningarmor (E, 15,139 w., 5 Ch. || Fake Relationship, Christmas, Mutual Pining, Friends to Lovers, Angst & Fluff, BJ’s, Anal) – John is invited to his aunt's Twelfth Night ball. Sherlock offers to attend with him as a friendly face among strangers, but John's family force him to address his true feelings for Sherlock.

Vessel by Rhuia (E, 15,695 w., 1 Ch. || Cancer, Medfic) – That was the surprising bit – the way his doctor said it, eyes shining with sympathy but breathing it out, shifting it off her shoulders and thrusting it onto his, making him take it like an unwanted gift.

A Life Well-Lived by Kate_Lear (E, 20,121 w., 1 Ch. || Original Male Character, Sherlock Woos John, Jealous Sherlock, Reluctant Bi-John, Past Abuse, Insecure John, Reassuring / Caring Sherlock, Protective Sherlock, Understanding Sherlock) – John got scared off men by an abusive past relationship. Sherlock has to try and woo him while not scaring him off with protective possessive rage.

Winter's Delights by Kate_Lear (E, 21,173 w., 1 Ch. || Holmes Family, Christmas, Fake Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Bed Sharing, Domestics) – Sherlock takes John home for Christmas to meet the extended Holmes family. Part 1 of Winter's Delights

A Shipless Ocean by myswordfishmind (M, 22,135 w., 4 Ch. || Post-TRF, John has a Kid, Angst, Reunion, Falling in Love, Open Ending) – Ten years after the fall Sherlock goes back to London to find that John no longer lives there. Instead, he resides in a seaside town, a widower, and the father of a seven year old son. Now, Sherlock must struggle with the fact that there may no longer be a place for him in this new world.

Maintaining A Personal Life by Gingerhermit (E, 24,284 w., 6 Ch. || Alternating POV’s, Bisexuality, BAMF!John, Jealous Sherlock, Romance / Drama, Sort-of Case Fic, Peril & Angst, Love Confessions, Toplock, Soft Idiots in Love, Post S3) – Sherlock and John discover some interesting revelations about each other’s sexuality, which lead them both to question the assumptions they've made about one another for years. In the midst of their mutual discoveries, a dangerous psychopath looms on the side-lines who threatens to destroy their new beginning.

26 Pieces by Lanning (E, 28,236 w., 1 Ch. || H/C, Torture, First Time, Happy Ending, Schmoop, Past Abuse) – Mycroft gives Sherlock the apparently simple task of solving a puzzle box containing a stolen microchip. It isn't simple.

Where Else Would I Be? by cwb (E, 34,910 w., 10 Ch. || Retirementlock, Domestic Fluff, Falling in Love, Parentlock, Fluff and Smut, Reminiscing) – John and Sherlock's five-year-old granddaughter spends the weekend with them in Sussex. Sherlock happily indulges her whims, and John takes care of them while quietly revisiting the past thirty years of their lives together.

Classified(s) by blueink3 (E, 36,153 w., 4 Ch. || Wedding Date AU || Fake Relationship, Jealous, PIning, H/C, Idiots in Love, Happy Ending, Mary is not Nice, Escort Service) – Clara's American father is the ambassador to some such territory that Great Britain probably used to own, but she (and Harry’s undying love for her) is the reason John is getting on a flight at 12:30pm, flying across the second largest ocean in the world, and pretending to be in a perfectly happy, healthy relationship with an undoubtedly perfectly coiffed stranger. See, Clara is not only American (and wealthy to boot), she's also best friends with John’s ex-fiancée. Whom she's placed in the wedding party. As Maid of Honor. And John just happens to be Best Man. Bloody brilliant.

Nothing to Make a Song About by emmagrant01 (E, 36,833 w., 10 Ch. || Post-TRF, First Time, Reunion, Jealous John, Pining Sherlock, Romance, Angst with Happy Ending, Sherlock Has a Boyfriend) – When Sherlock returned from his faked death, John could not forgive him for the deception and broke off their friendship. Ten years later, John returns to London in search of yet another new beginning. Sherlock, not surprisingly, is waiting.

Set in Stone by SilentAuror (E, 39,309 w., 1 Ch. || Romance, Wedding, Therapy, Fluff and Angst) – Sherlock and John are back from Ravine Valley and planning their wedding. However, as they move past the trial of the human traffickers, Sherlock can't help but wonder if he's imagining that John is becoming a little distant. Surely he isn't getting cold feet about the wedding... Part 2 of The Ravine Valley series

Only To Be With You by SinceWhenDoYouCallMe_John (M, 40,768 w., 4 Ch. || Black Mirror / Future AU || Character Death, Future Technology, Sickness/Cancer/Illness, Heavy Angst with Happy Ending, First Person POV John, Pining John, Heart-Wrenching Angst, Promise of Forever) – I tell myself that next time I’ll come near this same place again. Wait around for the mysterious stranger in his coat to dash past me, hot on the heels of a new criminal in black. I think this all the way back to my Exit, planning where I’ll wait and what I’ll say when I see him. Scheming on how to get his name. It’s only once I reach the Exit Point door that I realize two hours and forty-five minutes have passed, and I realize that this won’t be the last time I Visit. It won’t be the last time at all.

Corpus Hominis by mycapeisplaid (E, 47,709 w., 12 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Case Fic, Fluff, Romance, Frottage, Angst, Anal, Blow Jobs, Rimming, Spas / Massages, Shampoo, Jealousy, Fake Relationship) - John knows the human body intimately. He’s had plenty of opportunity for study as a doctor, soldier, and lover. There’s one particular body, however, he knows very little about. When Sherlock launches himself head-first into a new obsession and they get sent on a case in an unlikely location, the pair discovers each other’s bodies with confusing yet delightful (and sometimes hilarious) results.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse by SilentAuror (E, 50,635 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S4/S4 Divergence, Case Fic, For a Case / Reverse Fake-Relationship, Conferences, Marriage Equality, Travelling / New York, Pride, Homophobia, Bottomlock, Marriage Proposal, John POV, Sexuality, Love Confessions, Emotional Love Making, Public Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Passionate Kissing, Needy/Clingy Sherlock, Virgin Sherlock, Touching / Hand Holding, Bed Sharing, Little Spoon Sherlock, Intense Orgasms) – John and Sherlock go to New York to attend a conference run by the National Defence of Traditional Marriage Coalition in order to investigate the potential bombing of the annual Manhattan Pride parade. As the conference unfolds, John finds himself repulsed by the toxic ideology being presented, which becomes relevent to his own unacknowledged issues and his friendship with Sherlock...

Coventry by standbygo (E, 52,020 w., 26 Ch. || Dollhouse AU || Case Fic, Slow Burn, Sci-Fi / Fantasy, First Kiss / Time, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, BAMF John, Falling in Love) – “Let me get this straight,” John said, wondering when his life had become a science fiction film. “Some guy orders up a personality, a person, to his specifications, and they program this into a real live person, who has consented to do this, and she goes to this person and acts as his wife, or lawyer, or Royal Marine, or Navy Seal or what have you, and she has all the skills, all the knowledge, everything? Then you say the magic words, and she follows you back to The House, and they erase it all until her next appointment?”

Albion and the Woodsman by Glenmore (NR [E], 54,437 w., 50 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post S3, Parentlock, Pining Sherlock, Angst, Family, Drug Use, Depression, Sherlock POV, Light Humour, Reconnecting, Declarations of Love) – Sherlock and John are devastated after Mary Morstan makes her final moves. Sherlock relapses at the crack house, John walks around the world … and a lot happens in between. Parentlock, in the good way.

Wars We Fought, Things We're Not by blueink3 (M, 55,204 w., 10 Ch. || Post S3 / Post TAB, Parentlock, Fluff & Angst, Kidnapping, Whump, Post-TAB, UST/URT, 3G, Mild Peril, Slow Burn, Couple for a Case, Protective Mycroft, Infant Death Pre-Story, Friends to Lovers) –  Five months after John's world has fallen apart, Mycroft sends the consulting detective and his doctor on a case that neither is prepared for.

Isosceles by SilentAuror (E, 56,609 w., 7 Ch. || Post-S4, POV John, Original Male Character / Sherlock Dates Another Man, Love Triangle, Jealous John, Virgin Sherlock, Sexual Coaching, Angst, Romance, Domesticity, Unrequited Feelings, Miscommunication, First Kiss/Time, For a Case, Friends With Benefits, Bottomlock, Love Confessions, Spooning) – After solving a case for a major celebrity, Sherlock gets himself asked out. When John asks, he discovers that Sherlock has no intention of going, at least not until John agrees to coach him through whatever he might need to know for his date...

The Great Sex Olympics of 221B by XistentialAngst (E, 58,611 w., 10 Ch. || First Time/Kiss, Experiments / Sexual Experimentations, Multi Pairings, Voyeurism) – John Watson thinks Sherlock Holmes should admit that he, Watson, is more of an expert on sex than Sherlock is. But Sherlock refuses to concede the point. He comes up with an experiment plan that will resolve the issue. The results will determine who wins the prize. But sometimes even the best thought-out scientific study has unexpected consequences.

Bridging the Ravine by SilentAuror (E, 58,887 w., 3 Ch. || Post S4, Couple For a Case, Bed-Sharing, First Times, Confessions, Awkwardness, Sex Trafficking, Massages, Wet T-Shirt Contest, Group Therapy, Past Loss of Child) – Sherlock and John go undercover at Ravine Valley, a therapy centre for same-sex male couples in an investigation into a possible human trafficking ring. As they pose as a couple and fake their way through the therapy sessions for the sake of the case, it quickly becomes difficult to avoid discussing their very real issues. Set roughly six nine months after series 4.

The Bells of King's College by SilentAuror (E, 64,019 w., 5 Ch. || Post-S4, Missed Opportunities, Angst with Happy Ending, Fake Relationship, Case Fic, John POV, Jealous John, John in Denial, Travelling / Holidays, Virgin Sherlock, Wedding Proposals) – It's only been two weeks since Eurus Holmes disrupted their lives when Mycroft sends John and Sherlock to Cambridge to pose as an engaged couple at a wedding show in the hopes of solving six unsolved deaths...

Summit Fever by J_Baillier (M, 78,802 w., 18 Ch. || Mountain Climber AU || POV John, Angst, Tragedy, Suicidal Ideation, The Himalayas, Mountain Guide / Doctor John, Mount Climber Sherlock, Loneliness, Drama, Suspense, Slow Burn, Injured Sherlock / Sherlock Whump, Pining John) – After graduating from medical school, John Watson followed his heart to the Himalayas. Ten years later, he's a haunted cynic working for his ex-lover's trekking and mountaineering company. Will leading an expedition to Annapurna I—the most lethal of all the world's highest mountains—shake John out of his reverie, and who is the mystery client added to the group at the last minute?

Secrets and Revelations by Hisstah (E, 83,535 w., 9 Ch. || Sentinel / Guides Omegaverse AU || Adventure, Violence, Anal / Oral, Omega!John / Alpha!Sherlock, Case Fic, Politics, Mild DubCon) – Dr John Watson has some major secrets that he's kept from his flatmate, Alpha Sentinel Sherlock Holmes. Now the Sentinel Tower is after him. Can John stay out of their hands until he can reveal his secrets to Sherlock? Part 1 of Secrets and Revelations

Thermocline by J_Baillier (M, 83,557 w., 14 Ch. || Scuba Diving AU || Adventure, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Marine Archaeology, Asexual Sherlock, Horny John, Relationship Drama, Technical/Scuba/Wreck Diving, Slow Burn, Underwater /  Medical Peril, Doctor John, Hurt Sherlock, Anxious Sherlock, John POV, Protective John, Body Appreciation) – John "Five Oceans" Watson — technical dive instructor, dive accident analyst and weapon of mass seduction — meets recluse professor of maritime archaeology Holmes. As they head out to a remote archipelago off the coast of Guatemala to study and film its shipwrecks for a documentary, will sparks fly or fizzle out?

Maintenance and Repair by patternofdefiance (E, 106,650 w., 71 Ch. || Future AU, Augmentation || Augmented John, Depression, Body Modification, Slow Burn, Worldbuilding, Sci-Fi, Self-Care, Body Dysmorphia) – John wants to explain the rush of sensation and data, which is just another form of sensation (or is it the other way around?). John wants to say: Augmentation circuits report temperature, pressure, various forms of quantitative input. Sudden changes are reported as pain, since sudden changes are dangerous, and pain is the quickest way to encourage reflexive extraction. But all John can manage is, “Nng.” Because this sudden touch is not reporting as pain. Part 2 of STATIC

The Burning Heart by May_Shepard (M, 119,150 w., 21 Ch. || Canon Divergence, Post-TRF, John’s Sexuality, S3 Rewrite, Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, POV John Watson, John’s Gay) – When Sherlock dies, John Watson feels like his life is over too. He’s completely shut down, until Mark Morstan, a new nurse at John’s medical clinic, catches his attention, and helps him uncover the long buried truth of his attraction to men. Although he’s certain he’ll never get over Sherlock, John plans to move on, and build a new life with Mark, unaware that Sherlock is not quite as dead as he appears, and that Mark is hiding secrets of his own.

The Swan Triad Series by Pennin_Ink (T, 121,660 w. across 3 works || Swan Lake AU || Magical / Fairy Tale AU, Romance, Falling in Love, Pining, Psychological Torture, Transformation) – Sherlock and John grow up spending every summer together. Their mothers' attempts to play matchmaker only fuel their mutual resentment and scorn. But then, one summer.

Colors by Quesarasara (E, 140,537 w., 17 Ch. || Pleasantville-Inspired AU || Soulmates, Colour Bonds, Alternating POV, Angst, Fluff, Pining, Case Fic, Medical Procedures) – Everyone on earth is born with eyes that see in black, white, and an endless series of greys. When you meet your soulmate, you finally see the world in color. We're all searching for the person who brings color to our lives. John and Sherlock are no exception. Part 1 of The Colors 'Verse

The Adventure of the Silver Scars by tangledblue (NR [M], 142,458 w., 41 Ch. || S3 Fix-It, Post-HLV/ Post-TAB / Canon Compliant, Case Fic, No Baby, Angst, Humour, UST, Slow Burn, Angry John, Reconciliation, Not Nice Mary / Leaving Mary, Dependent Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Caretaker John, Fist Fights, It’s An Experiment, Virgin Sherlock, Dancing, Drugging, John Whump, Pet Names, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Scars) – It’s been thirteen months since Mary shot Sherlock and John finds he’s still pissed off about it. Sherlock had thought everything was settled: John and Mary, domestic bliss. But when John turns up at Baker Street with suitcases, the world’s only consulting detective might not be prepared for the consequences. A new case. Some old scores to settle. Certain danger. Concertos, waltzes, and whisky.

The Lost Special: Family Matters (As Do Relationships) by ShirleyCarlton  (M, 144,688 w., 40 Ch. || S4 Fix It Fic, Unreliable Narrator, John’s Mind Bungalow, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending) – Sherrinford is not really the name of some high security prison. That was just a figment of John’s frantic coma dream. And Eurus is not actually Sherlock’s sister. That’s just something random she said to John before shooting him. Sherlock and John were never actually estranged. That was just their act to cover up what really happened to Mary – or Rosamund Moran, as her real name has turned out to be. Sherlock does have a secret sibling, though, and his name is Sherrinford. After finally eliminating Moran – though in a rather dramatically different way than they had envisioned – and exposing the truth about Eurus, John encourages Sherlock to delve into his past and to find out whether the reasons to keep Sherrinford away from Sherlock were the right ones, and to discover what really happened in 1981. Along the way, Sherlock and John gradually, finally, stop keeping each other at a distance, and eventually become a proper family of their own. (SC’s version of Sherrinford may as well be an OC; he’s well written and different from Canon)

Sketchy by serpentynka (E, 184,053 w., 83 Ch. || Post-TRF, Post-Mary, John Whump, Slow Burn Love Story, Case Fic, Art, Porn With Feelings, Switchlock, Travelling, Career Change, Family Secrets, Illness / Health) – What (and who) will be left when nobody cares about your Work? A slow-burn fic with cases, places, mistaken identities, unfair choices, essential changes, violent feels, blatant lies, fearless portraiture, family secrets, high-risk bespoke gifts, durable friendships, bedtime stories, foreign travel and tongues, sickness (and health), and the significance of things which are slow to unfurl -- but cannot be ignored. Oh, and...porn. Part 1: Sherlock takes on an obvious case (barely a 4) and meets someone who will force him to re-examine what it means to see. Part 1 of Sketchy

The Gilded Cage by BeautifulFiction (E, 326,887 w., 31 Ch. || Omegaverse || Omega Sherlock / Alpha John, Friends to Lovers, Dub Con, Reproductive Rights) – In a world where Omegas are the property of the elite Alphas, locked away and treasured by those wealthy enough to buy them, John never questioned his flatmate's secondary gender. Sherlock Holmes was an Alpha through-and through. Wasn't he? A chance discovery turns the world on its head, and John is left grappling to come to terms with Sherlock's past as events conspire to threaten their future.

[ja0-s-blank-canvas-fic]

Part 3 - Chapter 15 - I-Island: Friends New And Old

Blank Canvas Part 3

AO3 - here

Fanfiction.net - here

It's finally I-Island time!!! :D Super excited to explore this arc with you peeps. ^____^ I'm sure you're all wondering how this is going to go down since Izuku doesn't have OFA. I myself am happy with what I came up with so I hope you all do as well!

Warning for spoilers for My Hero Academia: Two Heroes for this next arc on I-Island. Please watch the movie if you don't want to be spoiled! :D

Linktree to all the things!    

End notes for the chapter are under the line.  

There ya have it! The start of I-Island shenanigans. Izuku's muttering seems to just be getting worse but he's got an idea on how to handle that in the future. And it's just so fun for him to have awkward introductions because of it. XD

Melissa has officially met the Freakateers! Mei is so possessive and overprotective of Izuku. XD I just love her spaz nature so much. Her emotions always doing a 180 flip at a moment's notice. Hitoshi and Shouto of course would be more chill while Izuku is awkward but sociable. Plus Quirkless bonding time.

I had a lot of fun with Hound Dog being a part of their group in this. Easily sniffing out that something wasn't quite right. ;) And with All Might actually being open with his friend about OFA, David and he had a heart to heart both getting things off their chests. Will the Heroes be prepared in time? We'll have to wait and see! :D

Fun Facts About Japan:

This is more of an anecdotal one. For my personal experience with it comes to the JET Program application process, it took about 10 months. I submitted my application in September and got an email in December that I would get an interview which was in January. Then in March I found out I got wait-listed and had to wait to see if I would get picked or not. Thankfully only for a week! I got another email informing me I was to be placed in Yachiyo City and let's just say for me I was very happy for the wait.

In the application you can give requests of possible placements and why. Not a guarantee but I have a feeling it might have affected my placement. XD I put down Chiba as my top choice for the sole reason that Tokyo Disneyland was located in it. Yup, as reminder Tokyo Disney is in the Tokyo Bay area but technically it is in Chiba Prefecture! Anyway, I added that I would find a way to visit Tokyo Disney regardless of placement but being in Chiba would just make it easier. After a week, I find out I got Yachiyo that was 40 minutes away by train? Ya-freaking-tta!! I'll take it. And if I became the local Disney expert/park guide, let's just say I channeled my inner cast member and Disney magic. ;P That and years of experience visiting the US park as well as working in Disney World for a year.

Anyway, when it came time to finally depart for Japan in late July, for me it was quite the process. Depending on where you're flying from, not all airports have a direct path to Narita or Haneda airport. That was happened to me and so I had to fly to California, stay a night, and then take a flight from there to Japan. Lots of lugging around so many suit cases to and from and back to the airport. The flight to Japan is over 11 hours and once you get there, as soon as you get through customs and to the hotel, it's straight into 3 days of orientation. Physically and mentally exhausting but still worth it.

Then there's that first night in Tokyo. You're exhausted but how can you resist not exploring! Seeing Shinjuku for the first time was an experience much like how Izuku is when he first sees I-Island. So much to see, hear, eat, and just absorb. And I feel like I mentioned this once before, but I still cannot believe I got to see a freaking giant Godzilla head on top of TOHO cinema my very first night in Japan! XD That's when it really started to sink in for me. And it just so happened to be when a newer Godzilla film had come out too so double Godzilla. You can see some of my pictures here. Enjoy!

That's it for now! We've got more I-Island fun to come next chapter. But no spoilers for that. ;) Have fun theorizing! Okay, bye bye. ^___^

[potato-with-hair]

Fake News

First tumblr Story Ever

As the newest Avenger it seemed that Tony Stark and Captain Rogers were more than comfortable sending you out on all of the shit missions, granted, you could use the time in with your new teammates to learn their little quirks and start working to meld your abilities with theirs so that you could start working together seamlessly, but it was getting ridiculous. You were half expecting to start getting told to go out and help the NYFD rescue kittens from trees and helping the NYPD direct traffic on Broadway in Manhattan during rush hour. Y/N was a technopath, which was a fancy name for someone who could control technology and anything mechanical with their mind, or if you wanted to be technical about it, according to the official S.H.I.E.L.D. dossier:

Y/L/N, Y/N: Main Ability: Technology Manipulation

User can manipulate technology, the sum of techniques, skills, methods, and

processes used in the production of goods or services or in the accomplishment

of objectives. However, most users only can exert control over technological

constructs, such as computers, robots, hardware, and other devices that can be

termed as "technology", in any way. Manifested as a special form of electrical/telekinetic manipulation, a special form of "morphing" which allows physical interaction with machines, or even a psychic ability that allows mental interface with computer data.

Also Called:

· Cyberkinesis

· Cyberpathy

· Mechanokinesis

· Technokinesis

· Technopathy

Pretty cool, huh? Anyway, spring was coming to a close and summer was just around the corner. Tony asked me and Sam Wilson, you may know him as Falcon, to head to midtown

Manhattan because there were some “unsavory” characters hanging around Grand Central Station.

Turns out it was some low-level HYDRA minions that were basically trying to see what kind of trouble they could cause, they had planted a pipe bomb in a waste bin in the middle of the station and it was a Friday when thousands of people would be traveling through the station heading to and from work and school. I think that HYDRA was more or less just testing us Avengers out to what abilities we had and see if there are any hidden capabilities we possessed before they come at us for a full-scale attack.

Sam and I arrived and were able to find the pipe bomb relatively quickly, part of my ability is being able to read the signatures of different technologies and mechanics, and if you don’t think that a bomb countdown timer throws out a red flag, you are mistaken. Anyway, we found it, and rather than call bomb and arson with New York’s Finest, I was able to manipulate the mechanics myself using my mind. I shut down the detonator without ever touching the bomb and made the whole thing inactive within a few minutes time.

Easy peasy, 10 minutes, another fast sweep which took an additional 30 minutes, and Sam and I were finished and ready for our close-ups from the media that always, inevitably followed. We had a small group of media that always showed up whenever a call went out that an Avenger was “working” and there was almost always a small fan base at Grand Central or where ever we were working who would come up to thank us, like we were some sort of rock stars, and as per usual some of the younger men and women took the opportunity to do some flirting with us. Tony told us, unattached Avengers, that any publicity and light flirting and playfulness with the fans was good publicity and would help for the public to relate to us and see us in a positive light. I am not going to lie, I may or may not have had a little thing for our resident speedy Sokovian, but our little flirting in the compound never seemed to go beyond that, flirting. I thought there was a possibility he liked me also, but, so far, nothing. Although I did catch him staring at me quite often and Wanda and some of the guys were always talking to him and then immediately looking in her direction like they were just discussing her. Pietro did seem to always try to be around me and sit near me as often as possible as well. Also when the “fans” would flirt with him, I noticed he never really showed much interest in them, always watching to see what I was doing.

Oh well, time to spend a little time with the crowd before Sam and I headed back to the compound. The New York Times was talking to some travelers about the pipe bomb that was found in the wastebasket and what their thoughts were and how they felt about us being there to “save the day, yet again” when an overzealous “fan” started to get a little handsy with me in the background. He had followed me around and asked me to dinner a few times, flashing cash and his business card a few times, trying to press it into my hand multiple times. I explained I was really bust and thanked him but said I was not interested or available, but he kept perusing me. He was leaning over my shoulder with his hand around my waist from behind, body pulled directly flush with my back and he was in an excited state if you know what I mean, and he was whispering in my ear about some of his fantasies and things that he has dreamt of doing to me. Of course, the camera flashed right as he started to kiss my neck and I had a smile on my face because I was focusing on a sweet 10 year old in front of me asking for my autograph and telling me I was her favorite avenger. If the camera had waited all of 5 seconds more, they would have caught me performing a minor assault on the prick and another 5 seconds would have caught Sam pulling me off of him and flying us out of the station and back to the compound with his hand over my mouth because I let lose a string of explicative’s that would put Wade Wilson to shame.

The next morning I woke up and took a shower, went down to the kitchen and made my normal toast and juice and bowl of fruit, and could not help notice that the Avengers that were there were looking at me strangely, I thought it was because I was still in a sour mood because of that jerk from yesterday and the icky feeling he gave me that I was assaulted by scum. I knew that Rogers, Wanda, Sam, and Nat were on their way to Lagos on a mission. Thor and Banner were MIA since Sokovia, which left Stark, Rhodey, Vision, Pietro and I still here.

“Y/N, so, how was the pipe bomb incident yesterday?” Tony asked seemingly hinting at something

“Uneventful aside from a slight annoyance in the crowd, is there coffee left?” Y/N responded looking at him while rising to get a mug and pour a hot mug to clear the remaining sleep from my head.

“Nothing happened? Nobody special you want to tell us about?” Rhodey chimes in.

“Not that I am aware of or worth mentioning now that it’s done and over with, is there something you would like to tell me about?” Y/N asks looking back and forth to them. “Hey, where’s Speedy, he’s usually down here eating everything that isn’t trying to eat him first.”

Tony looks at Y/N and smirks, “It is strange that you should mention that, he came in about 20 minutes ago, I assume you were in the shower or I am sure you would have heard him, saw the cover of the New York Times, flipped out and, well, here you are, please take a look, we are on pins and needles to know what you think. And I hope you know that all suitors must meet the full team before you becoming an “item” and pass Avenger inspection, and Rogers is particularly tough.” He slid the paper across the kitchen island to where you sat, both he and Rhodey watching your face for a reaction. You unfolded the paper confused and looked at the front cover.

There in black and white at you was a close up of the stranger with his arms around your waist from behind, you leaning slightly forward smiling and the stranger kissing your neck, the little girl you were smiling at was covered by the person being interviewed in the foreground. To someone who was not there and did not know the story, this definitely looked bad, like a very intimate moment caught on film, the headline read ‘Newest Avenger Moving Fast With New York Wall Street Trader’ the article went on to talk about how you just met the guy and did not bother to get his name, but just let him put the moves on you, yadda, yadda, yadda. Apparently, after Sam got you out of there, the “gentleman: in question decided to make a name for himself and gave a short interview making it sound like you approached him and started the whole flirt fest, lead him on, and then abandoned him, with the promise to return. You looked at Tony and Rhodey with wide eyes and a sick feeling in your stomach, “This is the biggest load of shit I have ever read in my life, this is not anything at all what happened. About 3 seconds after this picture was snapped, I basically slapped the taste out of his mouth and would have continued to do so had Sam not gotten me out of there. Flirting? More like this guy assaulted me. This was not consensual or wanted. I told him multiple times I was not interested and refused his advances and invitations to dinner and he kept bothering me. I was talking to a little kid and he pulled this crap when I had my back turned to him.”

Tony went from joking to serious almost instantly, “Okay, we were just going to bust your balls on this a little bit, but this has just become a non-joke. I’ll have Pepper contact someone in Stark Industries legal department to get in touch with the paper to track this guy down, he’ll have had to sign a waiver for publication and we’re going to go after him for liable and harassment. If he tries to come after you for battery for the assault, well, we’ll call that defense, Avenger or not, no one gets to touch you without permission. Y/n we really didn’t know, we were just going to play around with you about this a little, and we had no idea. He didn’t do any weird stuff, right?”

“NO, I mean, I slapped him and Sam pulled me off of him and flew me out of there, anything beyond what he did to me and you would have been getting a call from New York’s finest about bail or my court hearing for homicide. I was shocked, but if it had gone beyond what it was, I would have raged a lot harder than I did. The headline in the paper would have read a lot differently today.” Y/N responded.

“Alright, I know that yesterday was weird and I know that Nat and Wanda have had to deal with crap like this from time to time, unfortunately being an attractive woman on the team seems to let the guys out there think that it is open season to treat you ladies like meat. It is unfair and it sucks and if any of the men on the team are around just say the word and well step in and make sure the guys know it’s not okay, or step back and let you take care of it yourself, whatever you feel more comfortable with. In the meantime, take the weekend off and go to a spa or go shopping or to the movies or whatever you need to do to feel better, charge everything to Stark okay. Just let us know if you need anything alright.” Tony hugged you with one arm and kissed the top of your head. “One thing though, Lightning Legs. He flipped out when he saw this. He thought it was true and got hot and bothered. I would suggest finding him and letting him know what is really going on because the last thing you need right now is a crazy Sokovian kid acting like a jealous boyfriend right now.”

You look us at Tony and across the island to Rhodey, “What is that all about, what is he flipping out about, he brags about all the women he is into and dated back in Sokovia all the time, what does he care about what happens to me?”

“Y/N are you serious? That kid has been crazy in love with you since Sokovia. I swear I was coming close to sending you both on a mission that involved a tropical island and a case of rum soon. If he’s not staring at you, you are staring at him. It’s sickening.” Tony finished with a sarcastic eye roll. Go relax in your room, we'll take care of this. Just try to put it from your mind and well talk soon. With that, you left and headed to the elevator bank to the sleeping quarters level, feeling shitty, but better because you knew Tony would do what he could to help.

You were only in your Bedroom Suite for about half an hour when there was a somewhat frantic knocking at your door. You got up from your bed, put down the book you were currently reading, and made your way to the door, opening it, you found a seemingly tormented Pietro, he entered your quarters without an invitation and started to pace the length of your room, looking at you, Y/N could tell he needed to speak, but he was not sure where or how to start.

“Y/N, I ……. The newspaper, I saw the picture and…… Who is he? Do you like him? I mean does he make you happy? I want you to be happy……… I know that no one will ever be able to………. Not like I do………” Pietro kept starting and stopping sentences, never actually completing any, and getting agitated. You had never seen him this disconcerted before, he was always so unruffled when he would flirt with you before and this was a whole new side to him that you had never seen before. It was like he was unsure of himself and it was not something he was sure of how to process. You walked towards where Pietro was walking seemingly carrying on an argument with himself and reached out for his hands.

“Pietro, please stop, okay, please. It is not what you think, I don’t know that guy. It was fake, it was false, I don’t know him, I did not ask for that, I did not tell him it was okay to touch me or kiss me like that, I was not alright with that, He did that without my permission, and the photographer took a picture and they wrote some fake story to make it seem like I was into it. I did not want that. I don’t know him, I feel disgusted by that.” You start to rub your neck where the creep kissed you, sat down on the plush cushioned ottoman bench at the foot of your bed and start to curl into yourself to make yourself as small as possible as Pietro looks at you taking in your words.

“Wait, moja bohyňa (my goddess,) some guy you do not know came up to you and started to touch you and kiss you without your permission? No, I will not allow this, who is this man; I will go fight him right now. Žiadny odpadok sa nemôže dotknúť mojej bohyne bez jej súhlasu. Nikomu by nemalo byť dovolené pozerať sa na ňu bez toho, aby sa poďakoval bohom, že bola stvorená. (No trash can touch my goddess without her consent. No man should ever be allowed to look on her, without thanking the gods that she was created.) Are you okay?” He sat on the bench next to you giving you plenty of space, not wanting to crowd you. “I will kill this man, why would he think he could touch you, Bohyňa (Goddess,) if I had been there, I would have stopped him immediately, I am so sorry I was not there with you. “ Pietro sat staring forward with a look of disappointment in himself. You leaned over towards him putting your head on his shoulder and he wrapped his arm around you pulling you into him. You snuggled your face into his chest drawing designs on his stomach and chest with your finger as he kissed your head and held you close.

“Tony is going to get the Legal department of Stark Industries to look into the paper and find out who the guy is and get him charged with harassment, and I may or may not have given him a good slap as soon as I got over my shock and realized what was happening, so I figure I should let the cops know everything in case he decided to try to press charges later for battery saying I attacked him. But I promise Pietro, there is absolutely nothing at all going on with that guy or any other guy in my life because I was sort of waiting for someone I had a sort of thing for to maybe make a move, but I didn’t think that he was interested, so I had basically given up hope and just accepted that we would only be friends, and that was okay, but I really was hoping he would let me know he felt the same.” You continued tracing symbols on Pietro's chest with her fingers nervously

Pietro put his hand gently under Y/Ns chin and raised her face so that his clear blue eyes were looking directly into Y/N/E/C, “Do I know this guy?” He asked finally deciding to go with the advice the rest of the team when they told him that Y/N was definitely into him, and Wanda assured him that yes, Y/N thought about him often and was only too nervous to make the first move, but if Pietro would, she would be receptive.

Y/N looks from Pietro's eyes to his lips and back to his eyes again and states “I am sure you have seen him around here, sometimes he’s hard to spot because he’s pretty fast, but when he stops or slows down and doesn’t try so hard to impress everyone he’s really an amazing guy. I have to say to, he is sexy as hell too, and he has this accent when he talks, uggghhh, it does things to me.” Y/N just smiles at him teasingly.

Pietro chuckles and smiling leans in but says softly before he kisses you, “Prednesiem vám básne a texty, ak ma chcete počuť hovoriť, poviem vám všetky veci, ktoré chcem s vami a s vami urobiť, ale nikdy vám nebudem môcť vyjadriť, ako veľmi vás milujem a uctievam. Teraz si môj, ako ja tvoj, navždy. (I will recite you poetry and lyrics if you want to hear me speak, I will tell you all the things I want to do to you and with you, but I will never be able to express to you, how much I love and worship you. You are mine now as I am your, forever.)” He then lays the softest and most soul-baring kiss on Y/N that she has ever felt. It was as if all the passions in the world could have been transferred to her through that kiss and as he softly caresses her face while peppering gentle kisses on her face, Y/N thinks that maybe this stupid picture is not the worst thing in the world to ever happen to her if it is what FINALLY brought her and Pietro together, she figures if nothing else, this will be a brilliant story to tell their kids someday.

Slovakian substituted for Sokovian

Y/N = Your Name

Y/L/N = Your Last Name

Y/N/E/C = Your Eye Color