#their story is so clear and important to me

[captain-huggy-bear]

The Collection

Pairing: Quinn Hughes x Fem!Reader

Warnings: N/A

Summary: You keep every single puck that Quinn has ever given you, he finds your collection that you've been shyly hiding away. It might just be the thing that makes him realise you're the girl he's going to marry.

Notes: I just want a boyfriend who'll give me a puck from every one of his games, is that too much to ask?

Totally happy to take requests/ideas/prompts at the moment in my ask box :)

Writing Masterlist

It starts quite simply enough with an ice hockey game, like most things did with Quinn Hughes. The two of you had known each other for a while, acquaintances through Kiefer, acquaintances who then had become somewhat friends, but by no means were you close. That had changed one afternoon when Quinn had asked if you'd come to watch him play, not watch the team, not watch Kiefer, but watch him. This had seemed quite the clear hint that he was interested, or at least Quinn had considered this a neon flashing sign telling you he was interested. He considered this him shooting his shot.

It later transpired that Quinn considered this your first date, despite the fact he was on the ice and you were beside the penalty box, and that he'd not mentioned once the word date to you, but that's a story for another time.

The important part of this first-date-that-didn't-seem-like-a-first-date was not just that it set in motion your changing relationship status from somewhat friends to boyfriend and girlfriend, but that it was the first time Quinn Hughes ever gave you a puck. Something which to many would seem inconsequential. People got hockey pucks every day, every game. Thousands of fans owned pucks from hockey games, in that sense you were not particularly special.

It had felt so silly, and so girlish at the time, to be excited over an ice hockey puck of all things just because Quinn had tipped it over the glass to you specifically. And it had been for you, the glare he'd sent to those around you who even looked like they might snatch it had been lethal. It had felt even sillier to take that puck, cradle it the entire game, squirrel it all the way home only to write the date and a simple sentence on it in metallic gold pen, 'Quinn asked me to his game'. You're not entirely sure what had possessed you to do it, why it felt like something you needed to record. It had felt so...silly to do but you'd been unable to resist.

You'd squirrelled the puck away in a box in the back of your closet, out of sight of prying eyes, but it hadn't been forgotten by you. In fact, it was seen every single time you went to one of Quinn's games. After each game you'd inevitably come back with a new puck, another one to add to the collection of pucks that you were growing. At first the number was relatively slow to grow, you didn't go to every game, not during the weird stage where Quinn had yet to outright ask you out and you, oblivious as ever didn't realise he'd been trying for weeks.

As Quinn and you began officially dating you found yourself constantly receiving pucks, every game you went to he had a puck for you and at the end of the night you'd write the date and a simple sentence on it of something that had happened that night, something significant in your relationship or simply something significant to you even if it didn't seem significant to anyone else.

Still, the box remained hidden in the back of your closet, something you almost felt too shy to share. Even now that Quinn and you were in a relationship, even now 2 years down the line when he'd asked you to move in with him once your lease was up, it still felt scary to share it. Realistically you knew Quinn wouldn't be put off by it, the sort of sentimental person he was, he'd likely love it. That didn't stop the irrational fear. Especially given how personal some of the pucks were to you. It just felt embarrassing like showing him your blog from when you were thirteen or sharing a sketchbook from when you were twelve.

Moving apartments had been as simple as moving apartments could get, which is to say not simple in the slightest. Moving your things into Quinn's place had felt a little like playing Tetris, trying to find spaces for all your books and knickknacks without completely taking over his space. Trying to find a balance between his things and yours. In that chaos you'd managed to sneak your box of pucks in and to the back of your section of closet, a, in your opinion, perfect hiding spot.

It was not in fact a perfect hiding spot. Perhaps you were naive to think that Quinn wouldn't ever find them even when you shared such close quarters? Or perhaps you'd simply been avoiding the reality, trying to forget about it except in those few moments when you got home from a game before him and rushed to write on your puck and throw it into the box along with its brethren.

Either way, whether naivety or a desire to avoid the issue, it didn't stop you from finding him in that moment sat on the floor of your shared bedroom, looking incredibly cozy in a big hoodie and sweatpants, but pawing through your box that lay in front of him. The cardboard worn and battered from years of use.

"What are doing?" You knew exactly what he was doing, you could see two years worth of pucks piled high in front of him, one currently being turned over in his hands, but the panic seemingly made your brain stop working. Processing the scene felt impossible, you could see what was happening but couldn't quite comprehend it. Quinn was careful with the pucks, almost reverent as he put the one he was currently holding off to the side and reached for another, reading whatever you'd written on it.

"You kept them?" Quinn's voice is quiet, soft, an almost whisper that has you stepping further into the room even as you twist your fingers together nervous of his reaction.

"How...how did you find them?" Perhaps it was silly to think you could keep them hidden, after all you couldn't exactly claim you'd hidden them in some elaborate or overly complicated fashion. They were simply in a ratty old cardboard box in the very back of your half of the closet. It's not like you'd hidden them in some secret compartment.

"I was looking for my ugly Christmas jumper for the party on Sunday...didn't realise you'd kept them all. Why'd you hide them?" He smiles up and over at you from his spot, looking boyish and sweet even as you internally panic about the discovery he's made.

"I...I just...it's embarrassing." You shuffle nearer even as you say it, seeking his reassurance without quite truly realising it. When you're within reach of him, Quinn tugs on your hand to pull you closer from his position on the floor, cross legged and leaning back against the side of the bed.

"Baby, it's not embarrassing, it's sweet...you kept every puck I've ever given you. That's...I love that. C'mere." He tugs you down to the ground, until you're sitting side by the side with him and he can wrap an arm around you. He's warm and smells like the laundry detergent you use, it's calming, reassuring even as you still feel that rush of embarrassment at being found out.

Quinn reaches for a puck he'd put off to the side, it's worn and tarnished, dents from being hit across the ice during warm ups marring it, the logos of Seattle and Vancouver hidden underneath your writing in gold metallic pen.

"See, look, this is the puck I gave you on the day we had our first kiss." You'd written across the front 'Quinn kissed me today!!!!!!!!!' followed by more exclamation marks than was reasonable for anyone to use. You could remember the game clearly, Quinn had asked you to come along, you'd still not quite realised that he was trying to date you and your obliviousness had set a fire underneath him. He'd been so fed up that he'd forgotten what subtlety was. After a hard fought win, he'd rushed towards you in the corridor by the locker room and kissed you in front of half his teammates, all of whom had decided that was a great time to cheer and whistle like they were at a football game. You'd been surprised by it, taken aback, needing a few moments to process before returning the kiss, but you hadn't been unhappy with the sudden turn of events that had you practically unable to form words afterwards.

Quinn's careful as he puts it back before reaching for another puck, rooting around in the box before he pulls out one with the Canuck's orca emblazoned across it. Quinn takes a moment to read it before practically beaming over at you, eyes bright and excited.

"This one is from the game where I took you on the ice after and taught you how to skate," The puck had a creative attempt at drawing yourself and Quinn in ice skates, stick figure form of course, 'Quinn tried to teach me to skate after the game.'

"You mean you tried to teach me how to skate...last I remember I'm still not great..." You tap a nail against the 'tried' in your handwriting and Quinn just grins at you, any lasting embarrassment has started to disappear, and instead you're left with a sense of warmth. That you have all these memories to look back on, moments you might have forgotten about otherwise.

"You're just a work in progress, baby, you can stay upright...most of the time..." You shake your head at him, rolling your eyes as he teases you. It was a well known fact that you were nowhere near as graceful as Quinn was on the ice, having never really ice skated as a child.

You reach into the pile and pick another puck out, a pride night one, reading the caption quickly and very much deciding that this is one Quinn doesn't need to see, "Oh, not, you're not reading this one!"

"Give it here!" You reach away from him, arm as straight as you can get it to hold the puck as far from him as possible. Naturally, it does very little, Quinn and his long arms simply lean over you and pluck the puck from your grip with ridiculous ease.

You groan, pressing your face into his shoulder to hide away from whatever judgement might pass across his face as he reads off the puck, one of the early ones, from before you even realised he wanted you. From the days when you were pining, crushing hard on a man you thought you'd never have.

"Quinn smiled at me during warm ups'...Oh, baby, that's cute," Quinn grasps the nape of your neck in his hand, pulling until you turn to look at him, your cheek still smushed against his shoulder.

"We weren't dating then...and you were always so locked in..." You try to justify it, that back then his smiles were rarer, he was always so focused on the game that a smile was special, that any little interaction felt special because he wasn't yours yet, but it doesn't stop you feeling silly and embarrassed that you'd felt a smile during warm ups was important enough to put on a puck. At the time it had felt like the only thing that mattered, that Quinn had smiled at you, that his focus had been on you.

"I always have a smile for you...even back then, I was always excited when you agreed to come to a game...it made me want to play ten times harder, baby, still does." Quinn can't remember a time when he wasn't excited to see you at a game, to know you were there to support him, even in the early days. If anything the early days were even more exciting, simple because it didn't feel like a given that you'd be there. You weren't his girlfriend back then, you didn't have to be there, he couldn't complain if you weren't. So seeing you had always felt like he'd won a prize because you'd given up your time to watch him play in a freezing cold arena even knowing you'd barely get to talk to him.

"They're silly..." You gesture to the array of pucks, the number feeling ridiculous. How had you managed to collect over 100 pucks? Why had you decided to keep them all?

You stop your self-doubt and wallowing at the feeling of Quinn pressing a kiss to your hair, tugging you into his lap until you're as close as he can get you. Quinn is gentle when he runs his palm from the nape of your neck down to the base of your spine and back again, a soothing rhythm that makes you feel more confident when you look him in the eye.

"They're sweet...this is our entire story in pucks, can't get better than that..." The way he smiles at you is so soft and sweet that you wonder why you were ever scared of him finding them, "Don't stop doing it, baby...Promise me."

"I'll run out of space in my box though..." You look down at the almost full, falling apart cardboard box from one of your deliveries 2 years prior, the corners starting to tear, the free space inside almost non-existent.

"Then I'll get you a bigger box. I want to be 90 years old and have a thousand pucks in a giant box, each with something you thought was special enough to write on it... even if it is..." He picks up a puck squinting at it, "'I made Quinn laugh.' or," Quinn finds another from the pile, "'Quinn said my hair looked pretty', although maybe I need to be setting the bar higher, baby" He teases you, flipping the puck between his fingers with ease.

"I was pining after you, okay, and I wasn't sure you liked me back then!"

"Yeah, I forget, me asking you to come watch me play wasn't clear enough!" Quinn has been adamant for years that it was obvious he was asking you on a date, that you were just oblivious. He was, of course, wrong. Asking someone to come watch them play hockey was not in any way an obvious invite to a date and you refused to take responsibility for the earlier miscommunication which was clearly all his fault.

"It's not clear at all, honey! People ask people to watch them play all the time, it doesn't make it a date!"

"It was so a date!" a date in which you spent near 3 hours in the freezing cold and barely spoke to Quinn...definitely what a date is supposed to be. No wonder he was single for so long when you met him.

"Honestly, I'm starting to think you're lucky I liked you enough to put up with you..."

"...I am lucky...I'm lucky you gave me a chance and that you liked me enough to keep all these pucks and I'm lucky you agreed to move in with me even if you hide pucks in the closet like some weirdo." Quinn grips your hips, squeezing gently, smiling up at you sweetly even as he calls you a weirdo like he's not the one who thought watching him play hockey would be a good first date idea.

"You'll be lucky to sleep in the bed tonight if you keep that up,"

"You'd kick me out of our bed, baby? Really?" Quinn pouts at you as you grin down at him from your perch on his lap, arms wrapping over his shoulders and crossing behind his neck.

"...I'm joking, I can't sleep without your snores." If you could call his barely there noises snores, the lightest of snores, the sort of snores that were almost perfectly rhythmic rather than annoyingly inconsistent. Before Quinn you'd been adamant you couldn't date someone who snored, that it would make it too hard to sleep, now? Now, you genuinely missed them when he was gone. The noise a comforting backing track.

"You should put that on the next puck, 'I can't sleep without Quinn's snores in my ear and his manly arms around me'."

"'Manly arms'?" You pull back from him slightly, brows raised in question and an amused twist to your lips.

"You don't think my arms are manly, baby?" You laugh as Quinn raises one arm, flexing his bicep. You can't even see his muscles underneath his baggy hoodie, too well hidden within his cocoon of comfy cotton and polyester.

"I think you're ridiculous...." You shake your head at him, settling back in against him as he peers down at you with eyes that can only be described as loving, soft around the edges and almost hazy.

"Well, I think I'm in love with you."

You sigh happily as you reach for the box of pucks just behind you. You find a puck you know from sight alone, plucking it from the box and handing it to Quinn in response. You watch him read it, the way his smile turns to a full grin that beams at you like you've given him the moon. When in reality its just a ratty puck that says, 'I think I'm in love with Quinn Hughes'.

[strwbrychffoncke]

"seems so unfair ,i want to cry,, 2.7k words synopsis: after you learn the truth about the explosion at your childhood home ,you seek out a certain crow with something important to say contains: angst -> fluffy ending! lnds sylus x mc!reader (fem-coded reader) ,established relationship ,based after caleb's return ,written before caleb is added to the game (so mind any inaccuracies when he is..) & mc talks w him ,brief mention of zayne ,mc has a breakdown ,v soft!sylus ,sylus comforts you ,he bathes you (all fluffy) ,carries you ,slight evol use but its to lift u up for 2s ,references to the main story (namely the explosion + when u meet sylus) ,slight reference to sylus lore but no spoils ,apologies ,lots of kisses ,cuddles ,i think thats it?? note: (proofread, not edited!) this is braindump based off of a tweet i saw today let me live :x

-

this was bad.

this was terrible.

no, this was beyond that.

this was awful.

your mind was spinning ever since caleb's return- the man from your childhood who you'd been sure you'd watched die before your eyes- his interrogation, and learning everything that you could in the long time you'd spent together in that room.

your mind was swimming with information overload: of the EVER group, the fact that caleb was alive, the emergence of colonel caleb no less...

but most of all, you think back to the explosion.

and the man you initially thought who had caused it.

your heart was heavy in your chest, overwhelmed with guilt that felt like it was physically weighing you down, prompting you to lay a hand over your beating heart and take in slow, deep breaths.

in spite of everything- of the information you'd learned from caleb swirling, questioning everything you knew and giving you a headache- your mind was clear enough to do one thing:

you had to see him.

you couldn't stop thinking about him, speeding on your motorcycle through the N109 zone back to the familiar base, thinking back to when you'd first met: your immediate resentment towards him, your sudden distrust, your desire to get any and all answers from him at any cost-

and namely, how you had accused him of the explosion from that day.

you vaguely remember at the researcher's shop the look of hurt that flashed in his eyes when the man had suggested you were afraid or disgusted by him on a subconscious level.

back then, you didn't know what to believe, and even long after he'd said it, the words of his lingered in your head.

"you really are a naive linkon citizen."

you think back to his warning of being wary of the ones closest to you after today's meeting, and even back when zayne had given you the enclosed research papers of your grandma's after she had passed.

there really was too much that you didn't know and too much information to properly process in your mind right now, but you pushed that aside for the moment thinking back to the leader of onychinus.

the boss that you had, somehow, grown much closer to and much more fond of than you could've ever thought possible.

your engine revs as you speed up, sun dipping just below the horizon as your determination leads you to the place you've subconsciously recognized as a second home, a singular thought circulating your head.

i have to see him.

-

when you finally arrive, you practically leap off of your bike, barely putting it in park and snatching the keys from the ignition before racing through the doors with the memorized numbers of the familiar keypads, heart racing in anticipation, head whirling from the ride-

but you couldn't stop now, not before seeing him.

as you race through the empty halls, peeking into every open door in case he may be lingering in one while you head straight towards his room, you run into something firm.

"ah!"

while the collision makes you stumble, the firm object- or rather, person- doesn't even flinch, hands automatically steadying your body as he looks down at you, a mix of mirth and slight surprise in his expression.

"oh? is a little kitten in a rush today?"

you gaze up at the man who'd occupied your every thought, panting breaths escaping you before you get lost in his eyes, mind emptying itself at the sight of him: of the man you've grown close to, the one you've sworn yourself to protect and watched him do the same for you.

you're overcome with a sense of warmth and longing, though the one you yearn for is right before you.

he's staring right back into your eyes, noticing their distraught appearance, taking in your slightly disheveled hair, the way you're catching your breath, and most worrying:

the way he sees your eyes begin to water.

"hey..."

his voice is that deep, gentle tremble he reserves just for you, dropping the teasing completely, noticing that something is really very wrong here.

"what happened? tell me."

he's begun softly massaging your shoulders, but only does so for a mere few seconds before you're clutching onto the fabric of his shirt tight.

your hands are scrunching the fabric so hard its causing wrinkles, but he couldn't care less when the tears break free and your face falls into his chest, your body shaking.

even if you wanted to tell him everything, you can't handle it right now, the information not even close to being processed by your own jumbled brain, and you're so overwhelmed that you can't help but to break down in front of the one you've come to trust the most.

the tears won't stop flowing, quickly staining his shirt as he holds you, and when he hears the first sob break from your lips, he swears his heart completely shatters at the sound.

sylus begins rubbing your back, reserving the questions for now, seeing that you're in no state to talk

even if his own mind was racing and heart pounding at the thought of someone or something hurting or threatening you- his initial response, seeing as it's rare to see you break down to such a degree in front of him.

after a couple of minutes of sobs wracking your quivering body, sylus feels you being speaking, a repeated mantra escaping in broken gasps from you, and his concern increases tenfold.

"i'm sorry... i'm sorry.... im so sorry... sylus, i'm-!"

you're mumbling apologies into his shirt between your loud hiccups and pathetic sobs, over and over and over again, unable to get any other words out than the ones you mean the most from the deepest depths of your stricken heart.

and even though he's overcome with worry, hands trembling ever so slightly wanting so badly to take your tears away, he doesn't ask now, he doesn't need to.

instead, he holds you, rubbing your back, softly shushing you and trying to soothe your cries.

"it's okay... let it out. i'm here."

at his reassurances, your apologies slowly die out, drowned out by your continuous sobs.

-

once you finally manage to calm down, sylus fetches you a glass of water, urging you to drink before he wordlessly carries you to his bathroom, starting up a bath for you. he takes heed to add a few drops of essential oil to help soothe you further (anything to make you fele more at ease in this state) as he adjusts the temperature of the water to be just right before slowly shedding you of your clothes.

he speaks here and there the entire time, small questions between every action as he rids you of each layer of clothing to make sure its okay with you, mixed with his reassurances that he's here with you before gently laying you inside of the tub and settling behind you to begin washing your hair.

his hands do wonders for your head, headache gradually subsiding as you close your eyes against his ministrations, sniffling nose taking in the calming aroma of the oils as you lean back against him to relax further.

when he's rinsed the soapy residue from your head, he massages a hair mask into your scalp before rinsing his hands and moving to massage your neck, your shoulders, and down your body, gradually cleaning and scrubbing away as he goes.

you feel yourself dozing off just as he's finishing, his fond chuckle filling your ears as he holds your heavy head steady with one hand, moving to drain the tub with the other.

"not yet, we still have to dry you off," he murmurs into your ear, warm breath pulling a slight shiver from you. he lifts your damp body once again, wrapping you in a fluffy towel and sitting you down on the counter.

you allow yourself to be towel dried by him, melting at the sound of his gentle yet off-key humming as he works, gently brushing away the spare droplets before he reaches for your lotion, squeezing some into his hands, warming it between his palms and again massaging it into your tired body.

you take a deep breath, all too aware of the love and care this man- known to be feared and intimidating to many- has for you as he wordlessly pampers you, knowing nothing but that you needed to relax a little, refraining from asking you about anything before he was sure you were ready to tell him yourself.

"arms up."

you blink back to the present, not realizing he'd finished moisturizing your body. you obey without question as he slips your nightgown over you, pulling up your damp strands of hair that get caught under it and grabbing another towel to dry it for you, closing your eyes again as he does so.

always so gentle when it came to your hair.

once he's satisfied, he helps you slip on a fresh pair of panties (you almost don't realize he's used his evol to lift you up for just a moment to slip them over your seated thighs before you're softly placed down once again, opening your eyes to see his soft expression looking back at you).

as he gives you a once over, you can't help but to wrap your arms around his neck and pull him closer to you. his hands come up to hold your wrists, but make no move to remove them.

"what's wrong?" he finally asks, worried eyes looking into your now slightly-calmed yet equally tired ones.

you blink once, pulling him towards you as you lean forward, soft lips meeting his warm ones in a longing kiss.

he returns the gesture with equal fervor, eyes closing as he revels in the flavor that is you, lips moving slowly and rhythmically against yours, allowing you full control of how this goes. after a few long moments, you pull back to look at him.

the faintest grin appears on the corner of his lips, still wrought with worry but just slightly reassured at your gesture.

"bedroom?" he murmurs.

you nod, and he picks you up, your legs wrapping around his waist and chin hooked on his shoulder as he shuts off the light, carrying you out towards the bed and gently resting your body on the soft mattress.

he moves to stand straight but your arms are still locked around his neck, eyes staring up into his. he lets out a soft scoff, gripping your arms once more in his hands, but again making no move to remove them from their place, staring back at you with a grin.

"how can i get the lights like this?"

at the sound of your soft laugh ringing through his ears, he feels his heart beat again.

"just leave them," you whisper, and the little smile has him obeying in a heartbeat.

you were truly is one biggest weakness.

"well, it's hard to lay down when you've trapped me like this, sweetie."

"no, its not," you rebuke, teasing glint in your eyes as you continue smiling up at him.

a happy smirk plasters itself on his face.

"wanna bet?"

before you can answer, a surprised sound escapes you as you're lifted with his evol, unlatching your hands and allowing him to take his spot sitting up at the headboard as your laugh rings out through the room.

"sylus!"

he chuckles, pulling you towards him and draping you in his lap, arms quickly winding around your waist, pleased hum escaping you as you lean your head against his chest.

the two of you stay like that, cuddled up together when the weight of the day slowly comes back to you, your mind once again beginning to reel, thinking back to what you needed to say to him when his soft timber breaks the cozy and comfortable silence.

"are you feeling alright now?"

you look up at his face, shaky breath escaping you.

"i... learned a lot of information today."

he hums in acknowledgement, hand coming up to caress your slightly-damp hair.

"about.. a lot. my family, EVER, and the explosion..."

your voice trails off as you lift your head from his chest, sitting up to face him completely before your soft hands reach up to cup his face.

"and it made me think- about back then, when we first met. i was so angry and desperate for answers, and-"

you take a deep breath again, feeling your voice begin to waver and eyes filling with regretful tears, but he holds your gaze and doesn't interrupt, taking in your every word.

"and- i'm sorry, sylus."

his eyes slightly widen at your apology, but he let's you continue.

"at the time, i blamed you, accused you, when in the end, you truly had nothing to do with it..."

"sweetie..."

his soft, glazed crimson eyes gaze back into yours as the picture begins to paint itself.

sure, you were right, it wasn't him, but he couldn't blame you for your assumption back then, not really...

even if it did kill him to consider you thought so negatively of him then.

still, he listens.

"you were right: i was just a naive linkon citizen, and your warning before- about 'the closest ones to you,' i just-"

his hand moves to caress your back once again, the other brushing stray hair over your shoulders.

"i'm so sorry," you sniffle, tear-filled eyes gazing into his own warm yet sad ones.

"even if you did kidnap me, and mess with me," you smile at the soft chuckle that rumbles through his chest. "you were always on my side, even when i wasn't on yours. you've looked out for me, taken care of me, spent time with me, loved me-"

the tears flow freely now, thumbs caressing his cheeks.

"i could never despise you, be afraid of you, or ever be disgusted by you, not in a million years."

his breath hitches slightly at that.

even though you both were well past that time, even though you both had grown impossibly closer- inseparable, even- since you'd met, his heart thrashed wildly at your bold declaration of reassurance.

"i'm sorry that i hurt you back then without knowing anything," you whispered.

momentarily at a loss, mind slowly processing your words, he doesn't get a chance to respond as you gently pull his face towards yours, planting another soft, loving kiss on his lips.

you pull back from him, smiling at the way he momentarily chases your lips as your hold on his face never breaks. your legs shift under you to sit on your knees, leaning into him before you plant a kiss on the corners of his lips, his chin, his nose, and slowly covering every crevice of his visage with your love.

his hands are holding your wrists firmly now, eyes fluttering shut and feeling your presence, feeling your kisses, feeling your love, your tear-stricken face no longer causing a full sense of anxiety but rather causing his thoughts to fear his heart might be seizing to function.

but if he were to die right here, right now, just like this, he supposes he couldn't complain.

truly, he had no fear of that moment anymore, but having this reassurance from you and seeing you so distraught by something that seemed to have occurred so long ago- he allows you to reassure him, and revels within it, each kiss a welcome warmth as he pulls you closer towards his body.

you pull back slightly to look into his love-filled gaze once again.

"i love you, sylus," you whisper into the night.

"and i love you," he responds, taking charge to kiss you first this time, heart feeling as full as it had when he'd first met you all that time ago.

and you stay in each other's embrace, soft whispers seeping into the night, something having shifted beneath this moonlit night, reveling in each other's comfort.

everything you had learned, everything that had happened, everything else that may or may not: you pushed it aside for now. you could always let him know later on, and you fully planned to.

but for now, you were satisfied to hold each other just like this, longtime bonds feeling mended, your normal chatter and whispered confessions filling the hours late into the night under the guise of the moon.

-

a/n: based off one single tweet that i saw today.. (couldn't find the og but it was basically saying they need to hear mc apologize to sylus for accusing him of causing the explosion once we learn more ab the actual cause) didn't realize i'd make a whole short fic of it at nearly four in the morning when i have to be up in four hrs yet here we are :x

[elainsgirl]

if we ignore all the ways the text itself makes it clear elain’s book (with az) is next and just look at the marketing/publicity side, i still don’t see how people can deny that elriel is next:

- the coloring book including the TT scene

- the illustrated dust jackets with nessian and elriel for acofas

- the countless magazine articles saying they believe elriel is next (time, E! news, etc)

- the decision to make the azriel bonus chapter exclusive to BAM but the feysand one to B&N, which has a much larger audience of readers and then reprint the feysand one in the special editions

- interviews where sjm said she’s already started writing elain’s book and had “dreams of ivy choking her” (if we go with their assumption that elain is book 7 and gwynriel is book 6 except you don’t start writing book 7 before book 6 so why would she have been writing elain’s back in 2018ish?)

this is all just off the top of my head so there could be more. and that’s just without analyzing the text, which in itself practically screams elriel!!! i’ve talked with 2 of my friends who are casual readers and none of them even know that gwynriel existed as a possibility bc of how outlandish it was. and if that is how casual readers in 2025 are STILL reacting to gwynriel, there is absolutely no way she would spring a ship that doesn’t exists in canon on her readers! at least mor and emerie was hinted at in acosf so if they get a book together, it at least makes sense bc it was explained on the page in the actual books. i just don’t understand how people can deny both the text and marketing decisions at this point

The second Sjm stopped mentioning Elucien in her videos and became “hush” “hush” about Elains Li - it was ringing bells that elucien is no longer endgame. But you’re completely right, lets *solely* talk about the marketing aspect of this. Buckle in, this is long.

*Before we begin, Let’s make it clear by Acowar/Acofas - Sjm definitely knew what was happening in acotar 4 = acosf and Acotar 5, she herself said both those books lay crumbs and foreshadowing for the future.

The colouring book that did quite well & rated highly on goodreads. It contains all the significant moments @elrielsgarden recently did a post talking about it but lets focus on the elucien/elriel scenes we get.

There is no elucien scene within the coloring book. The closest is this, the scene where Elain is standing next to Lucien. Where his focus is on Nesta and Elains focus elsewhere.

Then Mass chooses to include a scene between elriel: When you look at this scene, what do you remember?

This passage:

as much as antis say this scene is insignificant and means nothing - Sjm, the author herself clearly found it to be important enough to be included within the coloring book.

So, Here Mass included the iconic truthteller scene yet if elucien is endgame - why did she not include a single significant scene between them? Why elriel? It could have been Lucien giving Elain his cloak in acomaf? It could have been a picture of them sitting together when they first talked. Anything YET eluciens get nothing, so what exactly is the point? What marketing technique is this? Why did she want to include an elriel scene but not Elucien.

Moving onto the dust jackets:

Like, come on. You cannot tell me this wasn’t done on purpose, Mass knew what she was doing - so again, if elucien was endgame, why isn’t he apart of this? Why isnt he next to Elain?

You close the book, Nessian land on each other. Elriel land om each other. If Nessian is endgame and this was for a romantic hint/purpose. well. Following that logic - the same reason applies for elriel, another hint at Elains final endgame.

Keeping all of this in mind so far - Let’s look at some interviews from Sjm:

Let’s combine all of these to get a general gist of the spinoffs:

3 spinoffs = 3 novels. It was in acowar where Sjm started writing a story and realised she wanted to explore new characters- There’s a few characters I say Acowar diverts too that are “new”: Vassa, Helion/LoA, Miryam. She also says she planned and researched for Elains book. But the two most important things to me are 1) She knew Nessian were next AND what she wanted for the second novel. The third novel she left the door open for, logically; If the next book is elucien, Mass would have already known who Az ended with therefore knew what the last book would be about, Gwynriel. Vice versa. If Gwynriel is next- she definitely would have known elucien would be acotar 6 YET only 2/3 spinoffs were planned. Then - you may ask who or what the last book could be about? Prequel. Especially with the way HOFAS went, Sjm seems ready to dive into the lore of and history of pre-acotar.

So if Gwynriel was endgame, Gwyn being so important to the plot as Gwynriels claim: She would have been introduced in acowar or even acofas. The books that set up the spinoffs, is she brought in within those books? No. Even by going off on what Sjm has confirmed about the spinoffs, it already logically disproves both elucien and gwynriel.

onto the articles:

E! and Time are good sources that are held highly and people believe. They have an honest reputation for being informed and real as far as news articles can go. Both these articles talk about which couple? Elriel. Here’s the thing: For Gwynriel to work, it has to be next as (Azriels bonus = his pov next) so shouldn’t these articles be talking about him? Yet its Az AND Elain. No Gwyn. They don’t even focus on elucien.

To have these major sources talk about elriel…when the next book is going to be gwynriel is just complicating and confusing for casual readers which are majority of the fandom. Mass nor BB would want that, would they? And this bothers antis as some even lied that these articles mentioned their ships as well (conveniently no proof was given to go w the claim)

Nail on the coffin is the fact Feysands bonus will be reprinted and included in the new editions, the bonus that talks and has a slight focus on Elain. If one was to *only* have read Feysands bonus, be honest. Would you have come to the conclusion that Gwynriel’s book is next?

No and that itself puts an end to Gwynriel. The ship has slowly been sinking this year and this was the final proof- it was never happening. And if you don’t have Gwynriel -> no way for Elucien to happen.

And you’re right, aside from casual readers not clicking onto Gwynriel being next - for ACOTAR specifically, Mass has set up each couple before their book in the same way. They each have had some foundation, attraction, romance, actual tangible connections to the plot BEFORE their books. A gwynriel book will be a messy, retconneed book which is a lot of effort to create AND make sense with the previous series and I just don’t see Mass doing that. If Gwynriel was to happen, there would have been no need for elriel. These books focus on ONE couple. Elucien had angst without elriel. Gwynriel could have been set up to have angst without elriel, so why even create elriel in the first place? As a “red herring” ? But then why would any author go through so much trouble in positivity developing elriel and their plot for 3 consecutive books if they weren’t happening?

When you try to follow Gwynriel/Elucien logic there is a lot of confusion.

I feel like I got off track somewhere - my bad. Point is - by marketing alone and adding all that has happened in regards to the ships it had always pointed towards elriel. Elains book, Az as her Li. At MOST - there’s a speculation on a love triangle between Az, Elain and Lucien - even then who is the focus? Elain. Not Gwynriel.

I think 2024 was the year of elriels’ soft launch. BB and Mass prepping the fandom for an announcement and 2025 will be elriels year. Where everything will come together in a nice neat little bow. 🎀

[presiding]

AITA? the guys at the pub told me to find a woman because she's sleeping with my enemy but all i had was a picture of her ass that i extorted from a well-known pervert. he couldn't name her and i didn't recognise her ass so i gatecrashed a party. i narrowed it to 1 of the 3 hosts but they were basically the same woman, idk, i cant tell them apart. some guy in a mask told me he was in love with the woman i needed and would deal with everything, i just needed to get her into the basement. so i told her she was in danger and she followed me into the basement where i strangled her. i never got proof she was involved but i guess it doesnt matter cause i found the ass i was told to find. i told my daughter's governess and she went quiet but the guys at the pub clapped me on the back. AITA?

poetic justice in revenge games: what's with lady boyle's last party in dishonored (2012)

a longpost i'd prefer someone else made tbh

references at the end

—

where to start?

dishonored 2012 is a revenge game (tagline: "revenge solves everything" [see also dh2: take back whats yours]), where high/low chaos story outcomes represent different types of power fantasies for the intended younger male (1) core audience.

the story & level design

each dh1 level is designed around the concept of revenge. with Corvo as the player character, each betrayal he experiences in the story gives the player rationale to seek out a target for justice in each level.

"The difference between Dishonored and how it works in Half-Life 2 is that it's a lot more personal. I think you get that involvement because the character has personal relationships with people from the beginning. And it's very clear that people have fucked with you in a very personal way," [Austin Grossman] said. "I'm biased, of course, but I think Dishonored grips you much more viscerally, more emotionally." (2)

dishonored is a game about choice: between low or high chaos options, each level's story can justify your decision to kill or neutralise - (nb: this means each target must have done enough wrong to "deserve" death) - and each level design prioritises player decision-making/freedom.

a common misconception about dishonored 1 is that its a game about morality, or right and wrong, but i argue its not that deep (affectionate). the chaos system is more about your role in the city's ecosystem than a morality simulator - kill more people, rats feast, the plague gets worse and the city becomes more chaotic.

poetic justice

because dishonored is a revenge game, each level involves choosing a fate for your primary target/s that will feel like justice to you, the player.

while assassination is always an option, the ultimate goal for each level is to engineer a fitting end for your victim.

this ‘low chaos’ option is reinforced in two ways - if poetic justice isn’t fun enough on its own, the game also rewards you with achievements for choosing ‘nonlethal’ fates.

[sidebar: enough players gave feedback that they didn't enjoy the confusion of choosing the 'right' way to play, that this feedback loop was removed from dh2:doto and deathloop (3)(4)]

storywise, low chaos/nonlethal endings are designed to feel like poetic justice.

to achieve this, the target's neutralisation must be 1) uniquely tailored 2) to the deserving victim.

a common phrase you’ll see in the dh fandom communities is:

“the nonlethal fate was worse”

but if you inspect the villain's actions/planned actions there’s an aspect of scale. your decision to incapacitate a single person leads to countless lives improved, in addition to avenging their role in the character's downfall (see also: the central premise of game called dishonored). this aspect of scale in wrongdoing (eg. villains extend their villainy to not just the player but in-universe to many people) gives a feeling of heroism to acts that might otherwise feel cruel.

because this game is designed around catharsis in revenge, it's important that the player feels that their actions are both fitting and justified - generally in a “turnabout is fair play” sense. these actions may be cruel viewed without context, but they are justified in terms of scale - this game isn't about being moral, or following the law, it's about revenge.

dishonored examples of poetic justice:

campbell branded a heretic and cast out because his power came from weaponising Overseer beliefs & systems

delilah trapped in the paintings she planned to capture a child in.

sokolov who trapped civilians for experimentation, was trapped in an animal cage

each villain demonstrably, within the game’s narrative, earned their fate - and because these are fates they planned to inflict on others, or already had done worse, the player character feels justified in their choice, and by additionally tailoring to each character, there's a sense of personalised and fitting revenge.

with the exception of…

who is Lady Boyle? good qn.

in dh1, there is only one female primary target - Lady Boyle.

canonically, the player must neutralize her because she is providing funding to the man on your daughter’s rightful throne.

in broad story terms, you are asked to find her because she is burrows' mistress.

the clue to her identity is a portrait of her ass ("finest hindquarters in all of Dunwall" - Sokolov), and when you get to the party, almost no one knows who she is even though she's the host.

in terms of level design, she is literally interchangeable with her sisters - the game randomly changes who your target is, and the character models only differ by colour. in terms of the universe, she's less a person, more of a sex symbol. as well as anton's comments about her ass, there's also the pendleton brothers' comments about wanting to fuck her, as well as multiple partygoers comments about the boyle sisters' sexual availability. there's a lot of gossip ingame but little is substantiated (as a reminder: the majority of dh players have only played dh1 and have not/will not read the canon books).

from both an internal logic perspective, and an external logic perspective, it “doesn’t matter” who this only female target is. she's barely a person, more a piece of ass.

poetic justice (for her)

unlike other primary targets with their tidy poetic endings, Lady Boyle (canonically Waverly) is not personally responsible for mass deaths (unlike, say, Sokolov), nor has played an active role in your downfall. let me expand on that.

a comment i've seen a bit:

"well she deserved it because she's partying while the city burns"

a woman planning to stay sober because she's afraid someone's after her doesn't sound like she's having fun.

her funding is not proven story-wise other than hearsay until Corvo has already finished the mission (a note from a guard in the next mission mentions the Boyle funding has dried up) (otherwise its speculation, its not actually in campbell's black book).

there’s no evidence she is providing this money willingly, nor even that she feels positively about Burrows (the letters in game hinting at romance are from him). one of the plot-points is that burrows was using his former role as Royal Spymaster to blackmail nobility with secrets. so, there's just as much a chance that she was his victim. (i've heard others say this is canon but i wasn't able to find evidence for that... if you know something i am curious!)

to complete this mission low chaos/nonlethal, you either need to lure her upstairs to drug her, or strangle her, or lure her to the basement before doing either of those things.

your options are to knock out a woman who has done you no direct harm, and you have no concrete proof she's done you indirect harm, and then traffick her unconscious body to someone you have no reason to trust.

let's review:

is her fate warranted in terms of scale? we only know it's true she was giving money to burrows in hindsight (eg. second runthrough), so not really no.

is her fate poetic justice? she is sex trafficked not because she regularly kidnaps people, but because she is the woman target, and is reduced to the sexual availability that so many NPCs comment on—she is not even a specific woman, given that she is gameplay wise randomly interchangeable with her sisters.

so it's not a case of turnabout being fair play.

yes, there’s a canon ending but that’s not the point here—we’re talking about the experience of playing dh1 first run.

let's rewind to another quote from the writer above:

“[...] it's very clear that people have fucked with you in a very personal way,"

assuming that the point of each level is catharsis for the assumed player, you can read this another way:

if your entire understanding of Lady Boyle as a character is that she is an unmarried woman who is presumably sleeping with your enemy (she's referred to as "the lord regent's mistress" regularly),

and she is someone that many people want to fuck, or at least comment on her sexual activity or attractiveness,

and as the assumed player you view any of this as punishable,

then... I suppose it is poetic justice that she will be locked in some creep’s sex dungeon for the rest of her life as revenge, regardless of her lack of role in your downfall, and regardless of how willingly she aided your enemy.

in other words, in this narrative's logic: sexually attractive women have this coming. as a target, lady boyle is less of a character and more of a trophy to be won.

contrary to poetic justice which is tailored and deserved, Lady Boyle’s fate of being handed unconscious to her stalker, is neither tailored (there was no precedent for this to happen to her - contrast with the targets who take lives), nor deserved (there’s no proof she had anything to do with corvo specifically, other than being his enemy's mistress. its debatable she was funding burrows willingly).

the purpose of a system is what it does

in a game that prioritises player choice, it is not possible to progress the game without choosing either to sex traffic Lady Boyle, or kill her.

this isn't equivalent to random bits of lore you can skip - you cannot get progress past the 5th level without making this call.

it's bad faith to argue "maybe he just locked her up and never intended to sexually assault her" within a universe that provides, unprompted, comments on this woman's body, attractiveness & sexual availability.

It is also canon. this is what corvo decided to do.

but isn’t the empire just sexist?

"when he says bring the bottles, i bring the bottles. when he says undress, I undress." - recurring maid NPC voiceline [multiple environments]

the world introduced within dh1 is sexist and sexually violent. this is valid - i include these themes in my own dishonored fics too, so the issue isn't the inclusion of these issues.

the difference here is that this is a game in which player choices are inherently about justice. rather than being a bystander trying to the right thing in a cruel world, you are an active participant in sex trafficking, and you are rewarded for this behaviour (achievements, a reward later in your room, and this contributes to the 'low chaos' ending).

this isn't corvo fighting the in-universe sexism, he's not even leveraging it --- this is corvo and therefore the player perpetuating it.

there’s no specific storyline reason to mete out a karmic punishment to lady boyle, then, well... is this cathartic to the player? given dh1's target audience, it's not a huge logical jump to say the story assumes you the player won't notice that this isn’t a deserved ending (accurately, given how few talk about this. and we've had years to talk about this). she's a sexy interchangeable woman who might be sleeping with your enemy, and there's rumours she's funding him too, and at that point ingame that's enough for her to deserve this fate.

my most generous take is that it’s lazy writing to forgo a poetic ending for a level/target.

a canonical retcon

the developers later expressed regret about this (see below harvey smith tweet).

presumably to address that "corvo is canonically a sex trafficker" thing, they added a storyline to a supplementary book which demonstrates that Lady Boyle was able to manipulate their way out of being kidnapped by her stalker.

imo this doesn't help:

this information is not in the game - almost no players will know of this (consider the # of book sales vs # of videogame sales). in writing, if it’s important, it will be both in the story and clear to the audience.

It reinforces myths that victims of sexual violence are deserving, or are lying/exaggerating etc. “you lived so why are you complaining?” and/or "well she was a manipulative bitch in the end so she deserved it all along”

gritty 'realism'

“its realistic because women are raped and stalked every day”

hiram burrows has cctv.

people love realism while the power fantasy caters to them. part of the power fantasy of corvo attano as a character is how the women in-game treat you (cecelia trusting you, emily being adoring/attentive/learning from you, esma boyle & lydia etc wanting to fuck you, piero talking to you/begging as though you're the arbiter of callista's honor in the bath scene, and saving countless NPC women). and this level, this target, is part of the power fantasy.

the thing about narratively punishing characters for being women, or having the wrong skin colour etc—is that, when you defend those writing choices by saying its realistic within the context of a fantasy game, you’re saying that inequality and the structural violence supporting it is inevitable, even when everything is made up.

additionally, it's gatekeeping: you're saying that escapist power fantasies are only for certain people. comparing “poetic endings”, there is a massive difference between the real-life statistical likelihood of, for example:

“put to work in your own slave mines,”

“getting kidnapped by a stalker.”

in my experience, people invoking ‘realism’ as a defense of their favourite media don’t want to discuss the ‘realistic’ things — more often, they want the people for whom their ‘realism in fantasy’ is reality to shut up so they can go back to enjoying their gritty fantasy, with other people's lives as wallpaper.

but pres i like this game

me too.

on that note, thanks for reading this far - its natural to resist analyses that critiques something you like. its easier and more comforting to shrug and say everything was justified.

as genius as many elements of dishonored 1 is, it is still a game for young men made in 2012... which isn't an excuse, just a reason. dh1 had every opportunity to not slip into this type of lazy writing - there's no particular reason to handle lady boyle & this mission this way as its not even satisfying at a player/audience level.

this isn't one miss-step, this is multiple miss-steps, and is less commentary on in-story/in-universe sexism, but more just regular sexism on the side of the devs, which is in turn excused at an audience level.

by working out what a game did well or poorly, we can learn how to do better in narrative design. we can also learn to identify similar plot shortcomings in other media.

and, from my perspective - it's another little contradiction to sit with in the things we enjoy. ah, dishonored, you beautiful ugly perfect fallible game.

talking about it

it's important to talk about this storyline.

don’t use the main fandom tags to criticise people who find this storyline shitty. it's weird. even if you don’t care about extending base-level empathy to people who have survived sex trafficking and rape/assault, it’s also citationless behaviour; the devs said lady boyle's fate was a miss-step.

part of why this is rarely talked about is - well, it’s hard. its emotionally difficult to talk about sincerely, and its even more rare to find an audience who will listen.

as a person who has survived similar violence, i feel like i need to write an 2,000 word essay with citations to prove that the only female villain in this game is treated in a way that isn’t justified in a doylist sense, nor in a watsonian sense. and honestly? that's not great.

citations:

1 - Dh demographics targeting (pdf) 2 - Quote source 3 - Dev interview & (4) article with dev quotes

[4rk4n4]

I was inspired by the jacket in the mines scene to rewatch Brokeback Mountain (oof), and it pains me to say that there are even more parallels than I had initially thought with Zaundads:

(SPOILERS for Brokeback Mountain, obviously)

Jack and Ennis had Brokeback Mountain, while Silco and Vander had The Mines

They both met through work, and shared a living space. (Possibly sharing a bed as well).

It was Jack's dream to run a ranch with Ennis, whereas Silco and Vander ran a tavern together before they fell apart.

Ennis is more aggressive, flying off the handle when he feels threatened like a wild dog and carries many regrets paralleling Vander as the Hound of Zaun.

Jack on the other hand is idealistic with a clear vision of the future he wants to share with Ennis, and becomes quite prosperous despite being largely unhappy with his life paralleling Silco as the Eye of Zaun.

Ennis is unable to stay with Jack because he is duty bound to his two daughters, as Vander is duty bound to Vi and Powder.

Though not by Ennis' hands, it is implied that Jack is violently assaulted and left for dead. Jack never receives Ennis' final letter to him, succumbing to his injuries.

Ennis discovers that Jack "stole" his bloody shirt decades ago, and tucked it in his closet underneath his own shirt.

Ennis lives in regret the rest of his life, tucking Jack's shirt underneath his bloody one to hang in his own closet. Vander presumably put Silco's jacket underneath his in The Mine Hideaway that they shared, showing his love for Silco despite what happened between them.

I know this was unintentional, but my god...

I haven't watched this movie in years precisely because it is hard to watch. It is a beautiful story, but it's one of those things where you watch it once and you're good.

Still, I recommend it to anyone who hasn't seen it to watch and understand the complexity of queer relationships especially between older men in a world that is unkind to them.

The reason why I like Zaundads so much is in part because it explores this very difficult but realistic dynamic between older men, and I think those stories are important.

If you're still hung up on them being "like" brothers, I implore you to refrain from language that describes a romantic relationship between them as "gross" or "weird" or "problematic."

It really ignores the fact that for many men, describing their relationship on the surface as anything other than that was dangerous, and it was the only way they could be together privately.

[auset66]

PSYCHIC READING 🔮

If you feel called out from this picture or anything numbers or just feel like yes it does have my message. Go on. (No it's not tarot I am doing it just on my intuition.) 🌸🪻

Yes? Go on sweetie your personal message Is just below this. 👇

First I want you guys to hang tight cause for some it could be all for some it could be just one or here there. It is going to be a bit messy so please understand. Please let me know if it resonated. 🪽

A wish a dream of yours I see is comming true. Very soon very unexpected way. You even forget about it yourself. And you won't even notice it yes, you will realize it after Some time. Like oh yeah I remember I cried over it to stars year ago or so. I almost forgot.

Purple and crown Chakra. Meditation at 444 frequency anything maybe at this time will help.

God I might sound complete crazy but whatever here it is if you feel like something supernatural wanting to connect to you. Well this is the confirmation. Yes you are not on oh my god honey I am getting tingles. Amethyst, mountainy regions, fog, rain, lake, flowing water, you felt it.. it was real. You want to get clear picture? Try free writing or something or oh my god see what you are writing about these days? What type of character? The song? Just whatever it is. Or what are you drawing? When you are like absentminded typish. The clarity about it is there.

What recent series or manga or anime got you hooked? It has answers to your carrer path. Like the struggle, the relevance, how the character overcame it. Not maybe necessarily the same carrer but similarish problems.

Your cup of coffee. Try switching. Seriously what is even this? Oh. Yes if there is someone you are bonded over coffee or you know this one particular thing or person you associate with coffee. Yes. Time to switch. Yes. Yes.

Talk. Extend. Family. Friend. A cousin who or a friend or even your own sibling. Someone who you still close too offcourse but haven't talked with for quite some time. Talk to them. They very very very clearly need a safe support system. You. Go and talk. Not small talks or chats. Meet and get the tea. Something very major is going on and your advice is important.

Greece. Venice. Artic? Switzerland? is calling you. If you have been planning to go. Finally take the trip. Don't postpone it thinking again And again some other time some other time.

If a certain god/goddess is calling. It is new yes I am way too very sure. Something foreign to you. It could like you seeing them a lot on Pinterest or you just know. You would know instantly. Read and understand about that God/goddess. The life story and all the mythologies. Understand it on psychological level on material level. Like what it could mean and how and everything. Well just let yourself be know about it. The path further Will open. You will know yourself what to make of it.

Skipping parts? Don't? Make it known oh my god. Guys. (88) and yes. Okay. So in workplace or whatever. Well don't hide yourself. Let everyone know what you did. And what is your work. Who are you. Don't hide. Shine. And reclaim your original work. Don't let people (16:16) steal away your work, your ideas your, your limelight. Let everyone know your truth your originality.

Crazy tubelight? Just lock loose? Neighbours. Beware of your surroundings. Especially if you live alone. Look around and be aware of what is going on around you. Who is around you. Online too be aware. Don't overshare unless you are completely sure.

Unexpected turn. No in 6 months. I am so so very sure. Whatever you think impossible now. Yes Something totally absurd totally unexpectedly totally not really shocking but yes very unexpected that you can't even think of is going to happen. Just really trust me this. Especially if you are wearing something like with red dots on white or white dots on red typish dress or something anything. Even a bow red.

These are so random I literally don't know what I just wrote and why I wrote it. Let me guys know if you liked this type of reading?

Good bye and take care. And take those meds please. Your family doesn't hate you sweetie. Live and laugh. Bye-bye ���💕🪻

[dtupdating]

DREAM replied to another Reddit post!

Transcript under the cut!

Ludwig slightly misremembered, and didn't explain in a super fair way imo it makes me sound way worse than what actually happened

tldr;

I dmd ludwig suggesting he make a video, and offering myself for questions

ludwig replied and eventually said that I jokingly called one of his friends a whore

Due to the fact that a friend of Nicolas Cantu's had recently falsely said that "I got slapped at a party for calling a girl a whore", I asked him if that's what it was about.

He said no, and that he can't tell me more information because he doesn't think it's worth resurfacing it for her sake

I replied with a message about that, and then said I'd also provide context to the other situation just in case he was just telling me it's not about that situation (to "protect" the person's identity) even though it was, because I had no idea about any other situation.

Here's the important parts of that message that I sent him:

oh well unfortunately I guess I can't talk about this because I don't know what you're talking about at all, but I will say this as a general statement; A lot of people spread false stuff about me, or exaggerate, and have done it a lot ESPECIALLY during all of this stuff going on, as it's easy to sensationalize things because of how "hated" I seem. Intentionally, OR unintentionally. I have had to clear up so many different false stories of me being weird, or just a total shit bag, because the rumor mill runs super fucking strong when you're getting shit on 24/7. And every time it's just "oh okay that makes sense". It's not always someone lying, but it's almost always someone not realizing that exaggerating and mischaracterizing what they're saying can be a big deal, and isn't something they should do. I have never randomly called someone a whore, I have never called someone a whore derogatorily, and I would never do that.

I will completely and fully say that I have called friends of mine jokingly whore's / sluts / whatever, GUYS ANDS GIRLS, but only with people that joke along with it, or have expressly said they don't care, and again, only with friends of mine. This situation has been a lesson to just never say it at all though, because it's being used to make me out as a bad person. I would never use it that way, never ever meant anything negative when I've ever said it, and never have used it to insult or demean anyone, in any way.

I don't know the situation you're talking about, and obviously it's seemingly a bad look to have "multiple instances" where I called a girl a whore lmao, but I just cannot fathom that I called a stranger a whore, even jokingly, regardless of whether I was drunk or not. If I actually did, I would absolutely want to apologize and clear up anything that I possibly can with them, because it's upsetting to know that I made anyone upset or made them feel badly. I would like to say though, that it's not unreasonable to think that it is a misrepresentation of what actually happened, or is being looked at through a negative tint given recent events, when if this wasn't all going on, it would've been viewed as "oh that's obviously a joke". Given the fact that I have been a bit of a punching bag for a bit online, and you never know what motivations people have to spread things. Idk when this would've been as well, because like I said, the Nicolas stuff was pretty eye opening in a lot of ways, including specifically how people feel about those words in general. Which I never really thought about, and again, I've always been extremely careful and delicate with how I interact with anyone I've just met.

I NEVER would demean or speak down on someone like that. If that did actually happen, it was naivety on my part and not malice, and it's a word I'm removing from my vocabulary, and I hope I get a chance to apologize to them. But again, I have no idea what you're specifically talking about, so I probably won't get a chance, or even confirmation that it happened.

Either way, I understand why he didn't reply (I sent walls of text) and don't fault him for it. Although, the way this was said is annoying!

[our-ensemble]

How else could HappyElements go about writing Ibuki?

Just a little exercise to see what else Enstars could have done with Ibuki besides what they're doing now. (This one is long!)

When it comes to putting Ibuki in another unit, its very debatable, but its not impossible. Below are just my own thoughts and I'll get into why I wrote this at the bottom.

So, units!

fine: Not the best. Writing-wise, I don't think it's impossible to fit Ibuki in... somewhere? But all in all, fine doesn't lend itself to a story that would make Ibuki's addition natural. Also, aesthetically, it doesn't seem up Ibuki's alley. While Eichi's actions in Okinawa could lead to an interesting conflict with developments for both parties which plays into real-life social issues, that depends on Enstars' ability to write it, which is currently in an unideal place. That being said, I am waiting for the day that Ibuki sues Eichi. Put your court skills to use!

Trickstar: Likely not. Again, like with fine, Trickstar's overall writing makes this difficult and unnatural. Maybe with a lot of pre-existing development where its made clear that he'll join, but otherwise, he's difficult to slot in Trickstar's current dynamic (and that's not even going into Trickstar's historical importance to its producers as being the four of them + Anzu).

Ryuseitai: Possible! Ryuseitai is currently in a directional shift + leadership shift, and Ibuki's addition plays well into this setup. Additionally, in Enstars, the pre-existing lore is that units must have 2 - 5 idols as a result of War-era imposed restrictions, and it would be interesting to see how that tidbit of worldbuilding holds up in relation to this idea. Ibuki and Tetora's interaction in Ibuki's Idol Story 2 also provides some idea of how Ibuki's inclusion would go, and the interaction also makes the inclusion less sudden. Though, if memory serves me well, he rejected being the leader of EsuPuri because it was child-like? or childish? Anyway, he might have similar concerns with Ryuseitai - or he could embrace his inner-child some more. Ibuki should watch Kamen Rider Geats.

ALKALOID: It can work! ALKALOID is in a bit of a lull writing-wise, and adding Ibuki could be just the thing to stir them up. Ibuki's personality + identity means that like each member, he is marginalized, but his narrative doesn't seem to be stepping on anyone's toes. He also seems more ambitious and energetic than the average member, which could be interesting. The points about Tetora made above also apply with Hiiro and Ibuki. However, how Ibuki would wind up in ALKALOID seems hard to determine, since they are weapons-but-not-really-anymore of StarPro. Unless Eichi takes interest in Ibuki? Plus, there are only 4 suits in a deck of cards. Guess we'll have to make up a fifth one... (Would Ibuki be "one of the kids" or would he be Tatsumi's grandchild? The world will never know...)

Eden: Highly unlikely. Unless Ibuki REALLY sweeps Ibara off his feet, its not happening. Eden also has an "it is the Four of them" atmosphere - and even if it didn't, I can't imagine Ibuki being the most comfortable in this setup. The aesthetics also aren't really for him. Maybe when you're older and more experienced, Ibuki...

2wink: How. (everything from this point on is a joke to be clear) In the twin unit? The 2 unit? Do we kick one of them out? Does Ibuki become a triplet? What's the thought process here? Where are we going from here? Is Ibuki the family therapist? Are we finally getting 3wink (thrwink... thwink...)?

Valkyrie: In Shu's words - Non. Writing-wise, this just wouldn't happen. Plus - and this really was the only way that I could word this - Valkyrie's freakisms are not for the weak of heart, and while I don't doubt Ibuki's tenacity, I'm not sure if he would want to be around these two for an extended period of time. The aesthetics also aren't tailored to him. Additionally, Shu's habit of calling Rinne a barbarian doesn't translate well here, and gets us into a situation with a lot of microaggressions and little to no resolution.

Crazy:B: There's a chance - if Lady Luck's in your favour. If any unit were to suddenly add a guy midway, it should be the rebellious unit, no? A unit that appeals to outsiders could also make Ibuki feel welcome as someone unfamiliar to Japan - or it could make him feel more isolated, but that depends on a lot of things. In their writing, Crazy:B has been focusing a lot on their interpersonal relationships lately, and Ibuki's addition might get them back into their greater theme of rebellion - or it could ruin what has been established about their interpersonal relationships, and we wind up going over the same song and dance when it comes to rebellion. Fans are also really fond of the Crazy:B dynamic now, so adding in another guy likely would not fair well. Then, same concern as ALKALOID - how would Ibuki end up here? Lady Luck'll have to be extra nice to Ibuki if he joins this unit...

UNDEAD: Hard to imagine. Honestly, I just couldn't visualize this one. In all fairness, Enstars' ability to integrate Kaoru and Adonis into UNDEAD's major arcs hasn't always been the most stable (see: HappyElements not using their names once in the original summary for UNDEAD's climax event) and Ibuki would likely get the same treatment, if not worse. Again, very hard to integrate Ibuki in writing-wise, and he would definitely be outright neglected. A shame, because while he might not be suited to UNDEAD as a unit, it's not as impossible to imagine his interactions with the individual members.

Ra*bits: Hmm... Ra*bits' recent attempts to mix "cute" and "cool" so as to stand apart from girl groups while still retaining their existing appeal gives a bit of room to work with. Ibuki's definitely a "cool" guy, so I imagine that he could teach them quite a bit - but it doesn't look like he gets much in return for now. Aesthetically, it bears for him the same problems that EsuPuri does. Again, that doesn't even go into Ra*bits as "the Four of them". Maybe if they develop a lot of interaction beforehand and clearly outline their future goal...

Knights: I have ideas (but Enstars might not)! With Esu formerly studying under Knights, do you have any idea how funny this would be? People were a bit peeved that EsuPuri and Knights had similar aesthetics, but introducting Ibuki into Knights then setting up Knights as their senpai + rival could be so fun, especially with a rivalry between Esu and Ibuki to mimic the older rivalries our protagonists had (Trickstar - fine, ALKALOID - Crazy:B). Like, the guy that dropped out of being leader, ultimately leading to you to become leader in his absence, is now singing and dancing with your senpai who are considered some of the best in the industry. Also, like with Ryuseitai, we get to poke at the worldbuilding that previously established that units cannot have more than 5 members. Please tell me you see the vision. (though I will concede that the aesthetics + goals of Knights don't scream Ibuki).

There's also something here that applies with some other units as well - which is that putting Ibuki in units where the leader is one of the younger characters in the franchise helps show off how pre-existing characters have grown. Since Enstars characters have been aged up a year 1-2 times, there's been quite a bit of growth for them, but people tend to be stuck with their impressions of when these characters were younger. EsuPuri + Ibuki can help show the growth of the younger characters by putting them into senpai positions, sometimes for the first time. So, for Knights, it means that Tsukasa would have a proper junior for the first time - which either leads to interesting developments for the Knights characters or neglect of pre-existing relationships.

Which is to say that a) we get to see Kasa-kun curbstomp a bunch of children and b) we get to see Kasa-kun realize that having an energetic junior isn't better than having energetic seniors.

Switch: Not the one. Can't really see Ibuki in this one for, as always, aesthetic and writing purposes. Additionally, SwitchPs have noticed that Sora doesn't get as much attention as the other two, which could go in two ways. 1) Ibuki and Sora become an in-unit pair akin to Natsume and Tsumugi, and their developing relationship allows them to battle this disparity in attention or 2) the lack of attention gets heightened, with either Sora, or Ibuki - or even both - being neglected.

MaM: Interesting. Madara and Ibuki both seem to be the independent type, and its noted that Madara isn't mindful of others when dancing in a group since he's used to being alone. Though, his experiences in Double Face must have changed that, and it would be interesting to see how he has changed since Double Face's creation - but if not written well, it could trivialize Double Face's history. On one hand, fans enjoy seeing Madara make friends, but on the other hand, Madara's choice of being solo has been quite the question, and Ibuki's addition might bury this worldbuilding away if not written well. It definitely has potential, but it has just as much potential to go awry. Ibuki could be Madara's lawyer instead I guess.

Solo: HappyElements, hire me and I will raise you to levels you could never fathom!

They could have made a whole show of it! Have Ibuki go from unit to unit where he's their understudy for the duration of the event and have him assess whether or not he wants to join! This would tie into the junior system in J-POP where idols pre-debut usually become backup dancers for other units, going on to do interviews, songs and other things to build up a reputation before debuting and using their now established fanbase to make a lot of dough! It would tie in so well to the idol-like direction that HappyElements is taking with 4piece!

It could have been such a grand event! Have them build up the hype over time, show off the pros and cons that Ibuki sees in joining a unit, and then when the time comes to announce his decision after months, maybe even years in real-life - pull the rug out from under everyone and have him go solo! And since going solo isn't allowed in-universe, have them confront the War-era rules that continue to affect idols! Let Ibuki challenge the idol rules that Eichi once established and mess with the system!

And if he were rivals with Esu? Imagine if he outperforms EsuPuri as a solo idol - that's gotta be a hit to Esu as a leader... Man...

and AKATSUKI...

The new AKATSUKI could have been "an idea of Japan that represents everyone" which acknowledges those beyond the Yamato. It could have recognized the diversity in Japan, and allowed for the "idea" of Japan to no longer be dominated by the majority - a unit that respects the people of Japan who are normally forgotten. An AKATSUKI were Ibuki's traditions are celebrated, not chiseled down.

Instead, Ibuki is being absorbed into "the traditional Japan" - a very different scenario from the above.

That's all from me. I have a little extra info below for the curious.

Why write this? It's not really related to your blog...?

Fair question. But for one, I think that we forget that writing is a part of HappyElements' problem of discrimination (but just one part). As people have mentioned for years with Adonis, its pretty clear that the message is that racism is bad - its just that in their writing, HappyElements reinforces the racism that it claims to be against, thus pitting themselves against their own message.

This is only exemplified more in the recent AKATSUKI event, but what I really want to address is fan reactions.

There's a bit of a rift growing now, particularly with AKATSUKIPs and IbukiPs

"If you were a real AKATSUKI fan, you would still recognize and support them as four."

"AKATSUKI is only ever three, the AKATSUKI with Ibuki in it is not who I grew to love."

"AKATSUKI fans are being so rude - there is no problem with Ibuki joining, and he deserves to be in a unit."

"Ibuki shouldn't be in this unit, and it hurts for me as his producer to see him here."

But here's the thing:

Fans are not the ones who created this situation, so why are they blaming each other?

Enstars did not write a good event for either AKATSUKI or Ibuki, frankly speaking. Even if you remove every incident of racism from Enstars, the writing quality is still bad. Even if the writing quality was good in this event, it would not change the imperialistic tones.

But this is not a dichotomy - HappyElements doesn't have to choose between making either AKATSUKIPs happy or IbukiPs happy. It could have written anything else, as I've demonstrated in my writing exercise above. Some fans have been theorizing about other units Ibuki could join, and some are rather amenable to Ibuki joining their own favorites! HappyElements chose the most divisive decision, sullied further by a slew of problems.

When the song Tenshou KAGETSU was first released, prior to the story release, there was a common sentiment in the comments:

"Let's hope for an event that will make us both [AKATSUKIP and IbukiP] happy!"

And their hopes weren't misplaced. It was more than possible.

HappyElements' choice is what made it impossible.

[make-friends-with-the-rats]

Take this yap card!!

Feel free to yap about whatever in extensive detail:)

:O

for me?

I'll spare you Victor Hugo level yapping on some random subject and instead talk about how the musical adaptation of newsies took something away from every major character from the original.

Now, I've said several times before that I do not have any hate for the newsies musical and I really do mean it. If you've been here for a while you should know that I really do love the uk production and tutsies, but ultimately I prefer the 1992 movie. Really, I just think that Harvey Fierstein ran into the exact same problem in his adaptation that Kenny Ortega did two decades prior: newsies is just too complex a story with too many multifaceted characters to fit comfortably into a two hour runtime.

I think Fierstein tried too hard to make it fit and in the process had to cut important aspects of several characters. Namely: Jack, David, Medda, Sarah, Denton, Racetrack, and Crutchy. (For now we'll skip over the fact that most of the original ensemble was replaced.)

Beginning with the most obvious cut, Sarah and Denton were replaced with Katherine Plumber/Pulitzer. I personally really love Katherine as a character in her own right, but I think the issue with her replacing Sarah and Denton is that she is an attempt at combining two characters who serve two very different purposes. And the purpose that I think Katherine ends up serving turns out to be something very different too.

Denton is more than just a reporter who decides to report on the newsies strike, he is representative of all of the real adults who supported and aided the 1899 strike. If you aren't too familiar with the history of the 1899 strike, the newsboys' rally at Irving Hall was literally sponsored by the NY state senator, Timothy D. Sullivan (who by the way had once been a newsboy himself). The newsboys (and girls) had a lot of support from adults, and Denton in the film is helping the newsboys not because he's itching to further his career but because he truly believes from the start that the strike is an important story worth writing about. Yes, he gets reassigned and 'betrays' the strike, but he never stops encouraging the newsies to fight for their cause even when he feels he himself no longer can.

Denton is also very important in David's development as a character because Denton's betrayal (which comes before Jack's) is what really forces David to lead and to stop relying on other people to speak for him.

Sarah's purpose is to connect the strike to the other child workers (though admittedly, this isn't very well executed.) Sarah is the one who, in the aftermath of Jack scabbing and in the middle of her brother's anger, discovers Denton's article and becomes a catalyst for the Newsies Banner. It is she who realizes that the strike is so much bigger than Jack and her brother and she who understands it's impact better than anyone else because she's seen both the impact of child labor (being a newsie was actually a pretty good occupation in comparison to the jobs and working conditions of other kids) and the passion that Jack and the strike inspires first hand.

Again, Sarah's role in the film isn't as fleshed out as it should have been because so many of her scenes were cut, but when you fill in the blanks with context clues or by looking back at the scripts and what was cut, the purpose of her character becomes clear.

Keeping all of this in mind, Katherine isn't an adult like Denton and she isn't a child worker like Sarah. Katherine is very different from the both of them and brings an entirely different purpose to the story simply because she is her own character. And this isn't a bad thing by any means, but the meaning that Denton and Sarah brought to the story is lost by not including them. Katherine doesn't really 'replace' Denton and Sarah. So, to get the most out of Newsies, it shouldn't be Denton and Sarah or Katherine. It should be Denton and Sarah and Katherine.

Moving on to Jack and David, what these characters lose in adaptation is pretty similar. Jack visually loses his cowboy hat and bandana which might not seem like a big deal, but it is when you consider what these things represent. Jack's dream of Santa Fe in the film isn't about Santa Fe at all and Santa Fe itself is simply a form of escapism. It's a child's dream. The idealistic dream of a boy who's lost his family and is running from both his past and his fears. Jack also loses his moral ambiguity. In the musical, Jack isn't lying about his name or his family. His family hardly ever comes up and he freely tells Crutchie about his dad. In a way, the musical doesn't let Jack be a child. And not just because he's played by a grown man.

The musical sets Jack up to be misunderstood, he stole food and clothing to help his friends and dreams about Santa Fe because he wants something more out of his life. Yeah, that's fair. That's actually really darn reasonable. Jack isn't a scared little boy anymore, he's a young man who acts with a degree of maturity and clear moral intelligence. I don't like that change.

To me, Jack is seventeen and he feels trapped. He feels like he's suffocating. He has no family and he's left vulnerable because of their loss. 'Cowboy' is a façade to hide his fear. The musical just doesn't portray this as well as the original did.

David also loses a kind of childishness in the musical. Musical David (or Davey) scolds his brother for not wanting to go back to school/thinking being a newsie is better than school. Meanwhile in the film, Mayer Jacobs scolds David for expressing a similar sentiment. Maybe this change was simply to compensate for the exclusion of Mr. and Mrs. Jacobs and somebody had to say that David and Les were going back to school for plot reasons, but it's still at the expense of David. David isn't a parent. At the youngest he's fifteen, and at the oldest he's seventeen. He should be allowed to be selfish. He should be allowed to daydream about leaving school behind and doing something significant, or of being the 'man of the house' like his father. David should also be allowed to get angry and the musical robs him of that opportunity. Katherine's 'betrayal' doesn't effect Davey the way Denton's did and from what we see Jack's betrayal didn't effect him much either. He's disappointed, but he's not allowed to lash out. He's level-headed and reasonable and he knows that the show must go on. He isn't allowed to be impulsive, he isn't allowed to make mistakes, and he isn't important enough for other characters to have to earn his forgiveness.

Now you might be wondering how Medda's character loses anything from film to musical. First, we have to agree that there are really two Meddas. The first Medda is 'Miss Medda Lark[son/in] the Swedish Meadowlark' and the other Medda is the lady behind the stage name.

When Medda is on the stage, she's simply putting on a show. That's her job, after all, and we see this in both the film and the musical. What changes is the Medda we see in between her performances. Both Meddas very clearly care for Jack and the newsies and they are both given moments to show this. However, like the loss of Denton, the musical doesn't give Medda a moment where we see the injustice of how other adults treat the newsies in comparison to Medda. There's a heartbreaking scene in the original film where Medda, in the chaos at the rally, slaps a thug who's attacking Racetrack before she's dragged off the stage and out of harms way. "He's just a child! Can't you see that?" she screams. It's a case of an adult defending the newsies and shows us that these other adults are in the wrong. It's a small thing, but we just don't have an equivalent scene in the stage adaptation. Medda very clearly supports the newsies, but she's never given a scene that lets her directly challenge the adults who are actively harming and silencing the newsies, and I think that's a loss.

Finally, Racetrack and Crutchy(/ie) are both watered down. Racetrack's snark and serious side were projected onto the stage character Albert, leaving Racetrack himself to be mostly portrayed as comic relief. His older brotherly attitude towards Les is also lost.

Crutchy also looses his snark. His is more subtle, but it was still important because Crutchy isn't just a happy-go-lucky ball of sunshine. Remember when Crutchy snarked the Delancey brothers? Remember when he spat in Snyder's sauerkraut? Remember when he told Snyder to make friends with the rats? He also loses the line "I don't want nobody carrying me. Never, ya hear?" It's so important that Crutchy had pride, that he didn't want his friends to pity him or treat him any differently because of his disability. It's so important that his friends respected him and never did, even if they were just trying to help out of love for their friend. It's so important that Crutchy was defiant, that he fought back in his own ways.

There's just so much that wasn't included or explored in the stage musical in regard to the primary characters and it leaves them with less of themselves.

[awinterrosesstuff]

Gaara and Naruto bonded because of their struggles as a jinchuriki, their loneliness and similar childhood. Gaara is a mirror to Naruto and vice versa. During the chunin arc, and especially during Naruto and Gaara's fight, Kishimoto draws the parallel on purpose. It's hard to deny his intention. But at the same time, he wants you to know there's a difference between them : Iruka and team 7.

They basically saved him from loneliness and the same fate as Gaara. Without them, Naruto would still have been hateful and angry. They're his first bonds. He remembers different moments with every one of them. And that's the difference with Gaara at this point of this story, Gaara still didn't find someone who shows him another path and makes him feel less lonely. That's role goes to Naruto actually.

And Kishimoto used that parallel again several times when team Kakashi rescues Gaara with Chiyo. Naruto explains why he feels strongly for Gaara and again, he acknowledges Iruka and team 7 as the ones who saved him from loneliness :

Those panels are really telling about their importance in Naruto's life. And there are some fans who will still try to force others characters as his first bonds. And it's so funny, because Kishimoto isn't even subtle.

During the fight with Gaara, Naruto remembers about both Kakashi's and Haku's words about protecting your comrades and precious people. He understands his strength comes from his friends, loving them (something that will stay with him until the very end) and protecting them. And there's he's fighting to protect Sasuke AND Sakura and also remembers Iruka's sacrifice for him.

And that's not the only one actually. The whole fight shows how much he cares about them, how much he's grateful for them, how much he feels happy thanks to them... there's one example.

(Are you not sad by reading "it's okay for me to be alive... to exist." ? Because I am.)

I'm so tired of people trying to twist the manga and claiming that the one who saved him from loneliness is someone else. The manga stated it quite clearly ... from Naruto's POV but also the narrative. Naruto is very aware of his own feelings and what happened to his life. Iruka was canonically the first adult to look after Naruto, shows him kindness and care. The whole debate over who is Naruto's best friend despite it has been very clear since the very beginning is particularly ridiculous. I know many people dislike Naruto's bonds with Sasuke and Sakura (especially Sakura), but what matters at the end of the day is Naruto's opinions and feelings on this front.

Iruka and team 7 are Naruto's first bonds. And by dismissing their bonds, you're kinda dismissing Naruto's character all the same. I mean, it's his POV.

Also, I think the only one who becomes important to Naruto on the same level of Iruka and team 7 is pretty much Jiraiya. Kishimoto once again shows it by different panels and makes Naruto thinking about what Sasuke felt after the Pain arc :

Jiraiya is Naruto's father figure (he's his family). It's quite logical. Naruto spent three years of his life with Jiraiya. And it's very unique to their bond. Plus, it's Jiraiya's death who made Naruto understands Sasuke a bit more. Why ? Because of a loss of a family figure yes, but also because Naruto wanted to avenge his master. Narratively, Jiraiya is very important. His death - weird to say it like that - kinda brings him closer to Sasuke. The one Naruto always wanted to be close to since childhood.

I'm not denying Naruto cares about other people like Shikamaru or Hinata or Kiba or Sai. But the most important people to him in the manga are Iruka, (OG ?) team 7 and obviously Jiraiya. And remember the claim that Naruto can't tell the difference between liking ramen and liking a person ? If anything all those panels prove that claim wrong.

[pandapetals]

Hii, sorry, I don’t know if you take requests but I really like your writing, I was wondering if you could write a fem mute!reader x Logan Howlett. It’s okay if not xx 💗

Hi! Thank you for the request. I hope this did your request justice. I mixed in some sign language because I thought it would be cute for Logan to learn it.

logan howlett x fem!mute reader - drabble, fluff, logan learns sign language, no y/n used, no reader description

Logan had never been a patient man. Patience wasn’t in his DNA—not in the way his fists always itched to settle problems or how his temper burned too hot, too fast. But somehow, when it came to you, patience came easier. Almost natural. He didn’t know how or why and he didn’t question it.

You didn’t speak, at least not with words. Your hands, your eyes, even the way you carried yourself—that was how you communicated. You didn’t need a voice to fill a room with your presence. It had taken Logan a while to figure that out and learn how to listen to what you did rather than say.

Eventually, he had a soft spot for you. One that he guarded just as fiercely as you guarded yourself.

He leaned back against the couch, his arm sprawled along the top as the movie played on the screen in front of you. The glow from the TV flickered across your face, highlighting how your lips twitched into a subtle smile at the cheesy one-liners. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to make Logan’s chest feel warm in a way he didn’t often let himself feel. He didn’t even like this movie—it was some sappy rom-com the kids kept recommending—but you seemed to enjoy it, and that made it bearable.

You sat cross-legged beside him, hugging a pillow to your chest, completely focused on the screen. Every so often, your expression would shift—your brows would furrow when the characters argued, or your nose would scrunch when something particularly ridiculous happened. You didn’t need words to show exactly what you thought of the movie. Hell, you were more expressive than half the people he’d ever met.

“You really like this stuff, huh?” Logan asked, his gruff voice breaking the quiet. He didn’t expect an answer—you never gave him one—but he asked anyway maybe because he liked how your head would tilt slightly or how your lips would quirk in response.

This time, you turned to him and smiled softly, raising your hands to sign, It’s fun.

Logan smirked, his lips twitching upward as he pretended to focus back on the movie. But his heart kicked up a beat, the way it always did when you signed something to him. There was something about the fluidity of your movements, the way your hands told stories, that never failed to catch his attention.

You didn’t know it, but for months now, Logan had been trying to learn. Slowly, in secret, whenever he had the time—or the patience—to sit still long enough for one of the kids to teach him. If he was being honest, he was terrible at it. His hands were too big, his fingers too clumsy, and the subtleties of signing didn’t come naturally to him. But he stuck with it because it was for you.

And tonight, after months of work, he was finally ready to show you.

The movie shifted to a quieter scene, and Logan waited for the perfect moment. His palms felt weirdly clammy—he couldn’t remember the last time he’d been nervous about something so small. But this mattered. You mattered.

When the timing felt right, he cleared his throat. You looked up at him, your brow furrowing slightly with curiosity.

Logan turned toward you, his eyes meeting yours, and slowly��awkwardly—he raised his hands and signed, You are important to me.

The movements weren’t perfect. His fingers stumbled over the shapes, and his pace was slower than it should’ve been. But it was clear enough, and the second you understood, your eyes widened. Your mouth fell open slightly, as if you wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words—or, well, didn’t need them.

You just stared at him, blinking rapidly like you weren’t sure you’d seen what you thought you had. Then, slowly, your expression softened. A smile broke across your face, wide and bright, and for the first time since he’d met you, Logan thought he saw tears welling in your eyes.

He shifted uncomfortably, scratching the back of his neck. “What?” he grunted, his voice a little gruffer than usual. “Did I mess it up?”

You shook your head quickly, your smile only growing wider. Without hesitation, you reached out and grabbed his hand, squeezing it gently before signing back, You learned that… for me?

Logan shrugged like it was no big deal, but his ears burned hot. “Yeah, well. Figured I’d make things a little easier. You’re not so easy to read all the time, y’know.”

That earned him a laugh—silent, but unmistakably a laugh. How your shoulders shook and your eyes crinkled at the corners sending a strange, unfamiliar warmth flooding through him. And damn it, if he didn’t feel ridiculously proud of himself in that moment.

Thank you, you signed, your movements slow and deliberate so he could follow. It means a lot.

Logan glanced away, rubbing at the back of his neck again. “Yeah, well,” he muttered, “don’t go gettin’ all sentimental on me, darlin’.”

When he looked back at you, the way you were beaming at him made his chest ache in the best possible way. He grunted and shook his head, reaching for the remote. “C’mon, let’s finish this dumb movie. I didn’t sit through an hour of this just to miss the end.”

You nodded, smiling as you settled back into your seat, hugging your pillow tighter. Logan hit play, and the movie resumed, but he barely noticed the screen. His attention kept drifting back to you—your quiet happiness, the way your shoulders stayed relaxed, the soft glow of the TV reflecting in your eyes.

For once, Logan thought, patience wasn’t so bad.

[ranticore]

does pascal still have his horse monster form in lord of lies 2.0?

oh thank god tumblr is workin again

short answer: ya

long answer:

the clash between pascal's fun monster shape and the original folklore was another of the reasons i realised that Inver just didn't serve the story or character very well, and vice versa. I had already regretted my choice (when writing stbh in 2021 so a while back now) to portray some elements of the faeries as being somewhat inorganic or 'impossible' in a way that is somewhat non-euclidean instead of just fantastical. i wished i'd pushed more of a "this is an organic animal that sweats and eats and bleeds" angle and in particular the ties to agricultural communities (i also strongly regret my implementation of the otherworld but i can talk about that when mvf is finished hehe)

but it is important for pascal's character that he is also a place that you can be trapped in (barley field, TV set, etc), and his physics are somewhat impossible by nature and don't strike me at all as faery-like or particularly associated with trickster entities or falsehood (though there IS an element of artifice that's intrinsic to him) and especially not with agricultural communities or farmers. so where the fun monster shape starts to clash is its purpose of being just a frightening impossible creature - it's more movie monster than faery to me.

in folklore, the black horse entity that plagued a few rural farmers and fishermen was just that - a black horse indistinguishable from any other save for its malicious (or benevolent) behaviour and (for the faery, to be clear) this is by far my favourite interpretation.

[deviantlair24]

Not the Deal You Expected (Demon x FemHuman)

Books littered the floor as you meticulously looked over the spell in front of you. You had been researching for months, anything that could save your family from the hole your father had dug.

Your father had wasted the family fortune on horrible bets, he had a problem. But you weren’t doing this for him, no, you were doing it for your mother and younger siblings. If they lost everything because of your father's mistakes you would never forgive yourself, not when there was something you could do. 

You read the inscription out loud and used the silver dagger you had sold one of your grandmother’s broaches to buy to slice across your palm. 

A pained whimper left you as a few drops of blood spilled into the bowl. 

Please, you have to work...

“I offer myself to the Demon Azaezal should he grant my boon” You say lowly after a few moments when nothing happens. 

As soon as the words leave your mouth the bowl of herbs and now blood light on fire and the sound of a low chuckle could be heard behind you making a shiver go up your spine. 

“It has been a long time since someone has offered thier soul, I had thought this new generation had grown boring” The large red man, or Demon said. 

He was larger than any man and his features were slightly beastly but mostly it was the red skin and two large horns protruding from his head that made it clear what he was, a Demon. 

The sight of him frazzled you but you were quick to gather your wits as you turned to him, your back straightening. “I’m not offering my Soul.”

A red brow raised, amusement still in the demon's eyes as he looked down at you “Oh? And what are you offering? You don’t presume my powers come free do you?” 

You got slightly offended at the condescension in his tone, though another part of your awakened, you chose to ignore the reaction your body had. 

“I offer my virginity in exchange for my father's gambling debts being expunged and my family not being affected by my Father's poor choices any longer.”

The Demon didn’t lose the look of amusement on his face but it did look interested “And why would you think your virginity holds value to me? Little Mortal?” 

You lick your lips, the only show of your nerves as you answer but you can see as the demon’s eyes darkened at the action. 

“My grandmother told me about you, the deals you offer, and what you seek” Your eyes meet his red eyes that remind you of a roaring fire that seemed to gleam as he grinned and took a deep breath, as if he was taking in your scent. 

“Ah yes, I remember her. So, you want to follow in granny’s footsteps, do you? Well, she left quite the impression. I’m not sure you're up to it, Little Mortal.” 

You jutted out your chin stubbornly, determined to see this through “I’m up for it, do we have a deal?” 

The grin that crossed the demon's face was shark like and part of you was both excited and unsure about what was to come “You have a deal, just sign here” he said, producing a contract from thin air. 

You weren’t a fool and took the time to read such an important contract twice before signing, only making the Demon more pleased. 

Your hand hovered over the contract for a few seconds, pen in hand before you took a deep breath and signed. 

When your eyes met his you knew you had either made the best or worst choice of your life. 

“Well little mortal, we have a deal”

 

TO BE CONTINUED (FOR FREE) on Patreon (Cuz Tumbler dousn't like the dirty shit. lol)

Full Story - 2.6k Words

Kinks - Exhibition, Dum/sub dynamics, restraints, sharing, forced orgasm, degradation.

[lemon-mint-writes]

I love making myself tear up over my own writing/aus, I MADE DREAMNAP DISGUSTINGLY IN LOVE OK I'M ALLOWED TO CRY OVER THEM. Like. Sickeningly in love. And boiling over with life-long dedication and unhealthy co-dependancy. They are each others entire world. The brainrot for this au is just.....so strong. And it's not getting written for a while because yeah, I have other works I need to prioritize but mainly I WANT TO GET IT RIGHT. I care about this one too much :'))

[toneelspeelster]

you find your way back down, and i will keep the area clear.

[girlishwhimsies]

some of y’all just don’t like musical steve cause he’s black and you need to just get it over with and say it. like i’ll concede on some things like yes steve has a smaller role in the musical and two-bit has a bigger one whatever. but like movie steve doesn’t get a magical lore dump mixed into the movie that musical steve is lacking. you can use his book lore and add onto it using the lore renni has given us through his costume and similar things. part of being in a fandom is putting in the work. grow up and get over your own biases and realize the value in different interpretations.