#their smiles and faces of finally being together
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puppetwoman17 · 2 days ago
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I want to read more comics and fanfics about Cap/Billy being a respected member of the hero community.
But at the SAME TIME, I want to read something where his attempts to make friends is seen as too eager or boyish and he’s ostracized, so as he grows up he understands that he needs to dial it down. He begins backing off and letting people do their own thing. He doesn’t try to hang out with the younger hero teams, but makes it clear that he’s always there if they need him, because he’s a sweetie. He talks less with JL members, not significantly, but just so he’s not talking way more than he has to.
Everyone’s noticed. They are worried.
Billy grows up, gets reunited with his sister, connects more with his Whiz Radio coworkers, gets along with the Bromfields, meets and connects with other Fawcett heroes and finally gets his own apartment(with illegal means but shush I guarantee you someone else has done much worse). He’s getting his life together day by day and he’s more sure of himself.
Heavy on Fawcett heroes btw. They clock him being CC’s kid immediately. What do you mean the JL doesn’t like him? What’s their problem with our boy😡?
Little subtleties with other heroes… Because why is Cap not talking to me anymore? Why do I have to steer the conversation?
Did I do something wrong?
Did I fuck up?
Was I too mean?
He just wants to hang out. Isn’t that what being part of a team is?
He just wants to be friends like the rest of us are.
Cue young and older heroes alike trying their damn hardest to get Cap to join them for a game night or gossip session or joint mission where there doesn’t need to be a joint mission and Billy is just confuzzled.
He’s busy, sorry! (He’s cleaning up the radio station for a birthday party)
Something came up, you know how schedules can be. (Mary wants him to see his first opera. Billy is a yes man)
A friend of mine needs some help! Really sorry, I wish I could! (Ebenezer is about to die. He wants to watch the moment the light leaves his eyes. No, Mary, he doesn’t need therapy. No Freddy, he doesn’t need a hug right—fuck it, give him a hug)
Because even without knowing, the her community watched him grow up. And, like adult figures and parents in a child’s life, they miss the way things used to be. It confuses them, especially the younger heroes.
Oh, then an identity reveal happens and everything makes so much sense and they all feel so so so bad but Billy’s like “Hey, it’s no big deal! Everyone gets busy! And I’ve got lots of other friends to confide in!”
He says this with a smile on his face but it sounds like an insult. Now the JL and younger heroes are grappling with the fact that this whole time they’ve just been parental figures who miss when their kid was clingy🥺
LOL, TOO BAD. Freddy’s taking him to a game tonight. He’s got front row seats and extra cotton candy coupons! Suck on that!
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hvnyrt · 1 day ago
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Get What You Ask For
JASON TODD X FEM READER
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SUMMARY: You and Jason go for a joy ride on his bike, to which you get bold and he put you in your place
WARNINGS: Fem! Reader, Jason being mean, punishment, choking, fem!oral receiving, p in v sex, spanking, tied up, fingering, overstimulation, 18+, minors DO NOT INTERACT.
WC: 3.1K
You and Jason didn't go out much. Neither of you liked to be in the limelight, didn't like the camera flashes when you were with Jason.  Jason kept you close to him always. He made sure you felt loved when the two of you were together. He would cook for you, hold you, read to you, and sometimes even sing to you. But that was Jason.
Tonight was different, you were with Red Hood. Of course it was Jason underneath the helmet, but God, that helmet did things to the both of you. You had your arms wrapped around his chest, holding him tightly as the motorbike he steered sped through the city. This was his idea of a date, picking you up late from work after he was done patrolling, enjoying the breeze and lights of the city. The two of you had been riding for about twenty minutes, Jason wants to just enjoy your arms around him, ride his bike through his city, with his girl wrapped around him. You had different plans though.
You had been itching for some relief all day now. Rocking back and forth in your chair when you were in meetings, trying to get something. You finally had your lover in your arms, and you knew exactly what he could give you, and you knew exactly how to get it. 
You had your arms wrapped tightly around his chest, holding tightly as to make sure you didn't fall off. You slowly ran your hands down his chest, making sure to apply pressure as you did so. You leaned harder into him, pushing your chest into his back. You ran your hands down, running down to his rough pants, his thighs spread gloriously as he pressed on the gas pedal. You finally reached his thighs, running your hands inwards, closer to his zipper.
“Doll” He started, a low growl in his voice. “If you know what’s good for you you’ll wait.” You could tell by the tone of his voice, his lip was twitched, his teeth baring.
“What?” You replied sweetly, a small smile on your face. You pressed your hands further, applied pressure onto his length, feeling his size through his pants. “I'm not doing anything.”
Jason quickly grabbed your wrists, pulling them back up to his chest as he pinned them there, wrapping your arms around him again. He turned over just slightly, giving you a look over his shoulder. Even through the helmet, you could feel his glare. “Keep ‘em there.” He stated firmly, the rumble in his chest reverberating onto you.
You hummed, ignoring his words, and running your hands right back down to where they were. You began to palm him through his jeans, feeling his growing erection growing stronger. You let out a low whine, leaning further into him. “I've been craving you all day,” You said with a gloomy sigh, a pleading look underneath your helmet. 
“Then you’ll wait.” Jason said again, a firm conviction in his voice. He once again brought your wrists back to his chest, not letting them go this time. He pressed his foot on the pedal harder, the bike eliciting a low whistle as it boosted. You yelped as you leaned further into Jason, the wind of the Gotham night air blowing over the two of you.
After about five, long, tantalizing minutes, Jason pulled the bike into a low-lit area. He parked the bike, jumping off. Before you could even think about moving, Jason grabbed you upper arm, yanking you off the bike. You stumbled off, tripping over your feet behind him. He made sure to pause for you to catch yourself, even though he was being rough, he still cared about you.
He dragged you through the fire escape of his apartment, pushing you through the door once you arrived. You huffed as he dragged you to your shared bedroom. Pushing you down onto the bed once you arrived.
You groaned as he pushed you down, using your hands to push yourself up and move your now tangled hair out of your face. You sat up on your elbows, eyeing Jason as he paced around the bed, watching you like a predator stalking its prey. You stared at him back with the same conviction, your cheeks flushed as you felt the energy in the room shift to a lustful one. You felt your inner core throb with need as Jason eyed you, slowly taking off his helmet.
“You know.” He started slowly, his hair wild from being trapped in his helmet, “I expect you to listen when you're told to do something.” He taunted, dipping onto the bed with his knee, as he stalked closer to you.
You instinctively crawled back, holding yourself with your arms as you started back into hips deep green eyes, a look of lust and fear sprawled on your face. “ I just thought-” 
Jason cut you off with one large hand covering your neck. He applied pressure, choking you as he pushed you against the headboard. “‘You just thought what? That you were in control?” Jason mocked, tilting his head as he watched you struggle to breathe. He let go just a bit, allowing air to come through, yet still applying pressure.
You swallowed, catching your breath as you looked up at him. “I just needed you,” You whined.
Jason let out a low chuckle, letting go of your neck as he placed both hands around your head, blocking you in. He bent down, beginning to place sloppy wet kisses along your neck. You let out a low whine, as he sucked on your most sensitive spots, leaving bite marks and purple bruises. You brought your hands up, going to run them through his mess of black hair, before he caught both of your hands in one. “You lost the privilege to touch me a long time ago, doll.”
You whined loudly at that, pouting. All day all you had been wanting was to touch him, to feel him, and now he took that from you. “But I need you, Jay,” You plead.
Jason laughs, sitting up on his knees as he began to unbuckle his belt, as he was still fully dressed in his patrol gear. “Should've thought about that before you started touching all over me huh?’’ He taunted, taking his belt fully off. He grabbed your wrists again, to which you fought. You wriggled and whined against him, before he growled, and placed a hard slap on the side of your thigh, a warning. You immediately went limp, whines still leaving your lips. Jason laughed once again at your response, as he began to tie your wrists together and above your head with his belt.
“There’s my good girl,” Jason smiled as he placed a soft kiss to your forehead, kissing down to your neck and to your chest. Jsson grabbed your wrists and pulled you up, yanking the sweatshirt you were wearing off in a swipe. You gasped at the cold air against you before Jason began to quickly kiss all over your chest teasing you over your bra.
You arched up, pressing your hips into his as you craved more, needed more. “Jay, please”
“Use your words. What do you want?” He replied in an instant, his tough demeanor not faltering whatsoever.
You whined as you turned your head, watching as Jason kissed along your chest, his green eyes still staring into yours. “I, I need you to make me feel good. Need you fuck me,” You begged, you voice trembling with a whimper.
Jason just smiled against you, as he took your bra off with a click of your clasp. “Well you should've just said so baby,” He said before bringing one of your nipples into his mouth, the other being abused with his calloused hand.
You moaned loudly as your body responded to him. You could feel your heat building up, your panties sticking to you, your jeans suddenly getting way too hot. You wriggled underneath him, punching your jailed wrists into the mattress, as you wanted nothing more than to touch him. Jason then switched breasts, his mouth now attending the opposite one, his now free hand running down your body, as he unbuttoned your jeans, jamming his hand into your panties. He let out a low moan as he touched your folds, his face contorting into one of pleasure. “Fuck you’re soaked, gonna drown in you baby,” He muttered, leaving you now reddened nipple as he began to kiss your stomach.
You moaned and cried underneath him, your body moving and begging for him. “All for you, please Jay, it's all for you,” You whined, throwing your head back and you arched your back.
Jaosn hummed, placing a kiss right below your belly button. He looked up at you through his eyelashes, the moonlight coming right through your window and shining into his eyes. “How kind of you,” He mocked, before yanking your jeans down, your panties with them. You gasped as the cold air hit you once more, as Jason disgustingly inhaled your scent, setting his head right on  your inner thigh, teasing you as the feel of his hot breath on your core drove you insane. Jason hummed, before placing a kiss right on your clit, a moan escaping you in response. “You're right,” He started, looking up at you one last time, “This is all for me.” He confirmed, before he dove right into your pussy, eating you from the inside out. You yelled in glory as he ate you like his final meal. Arching and thrashing underneath him, Jason slopped all over you, disgusting noises filling the room, as he used his nose to brush against your clit as he attacked your hole with his tongue. You clenched around nothing. Pulsing as he now sucked on your clit, staring daggers into your eyes as he ate you whole. 
You whined and groaned, wanting to touch him, to feel him inside of you, but God, you were already close, his mouth doing dangerous things to you. Your whines and pants came out in shorter and faster strides, alerting Jason of your peak coming soon. He continued to eat you as he spoke against you, “Damn, you were needy.” Jason mocked, before you let out a scream, as you gushed all over his face, falling back into the bed as you panted, and screamed Jason's name.
Jason made sure to lap up all your juices, making sure not to leave a drop to be soaked up by the sheets. He loved the way you tasted, and he was greedy for it all, yet there was one person he would share with. He sat back upright again, sitting on his knees, his now full erection begging to break free from his jeans. He watched as you came down from your high, rubbing your sides to comfort you. Once you were back, staring in his eyes, he spoke, “You wanna taste yourself? It's five stars, baby," he joked.
You smiled up at him, nodding. “Mhm, gotta make sure it's good,” You giggled back.
Jason chuckled, leaning down to capture your lips in a kiss. He claimed your mouth as his, taking control of your tongue and exploring its environment. He slowly reached up, before letting your wrists free, throwing the belt on the floor. With your hand now free, you rushed them to his hairs, pulling on his and rubbing his head as he kissed you. You let your hands roam over his neck, pushing off his leather jacket, now left in just his body armor and jeans. His clothed state juxtaposed with your fully naked one. You brought your hands back to his front, clawing at his zipper once more. He broke the kiss, eyeing you. “Behave.” He simply stated firmly, “You'll get what you want.” He said, going back to kiss you as he brought your hands up to wrap around his neck. He brought one hand down, beginning to prep you for his entrance. He pushed through your folds, sticking two large, rough fingers inside of you as he began to thrust them inside of you. You wrapped your hands around his neck, whining and pulling him closer as he began to finger you. He placed his thumb on your clit, rubbing it as he fingered you, talking you through it the whole time.
“This what you wanted? Wanted me to make you feel good like this? Haven't even given you my cock yet and you're already getting close to cumming again on my fingers, I can feel it. You wanna cum on my fingers, wanna prove to me how badly you need my cock?”
You groaned and clawed at the back of Jason’s neck pulling him closer as you began to move your hips against his fingers. You nodded rapidly, panting as your second climax began to hit you again. “Fuck, fuck yes Jay I wanna cum all over you, want you to feel how badly I need you, you make me feel so good,” You blabbered, choking on your words as you rode his fingers through your second orgasm.
Jason watched as you hit your climax again, his fingers slowing but never stopping as he pushed you through your second orgasm. Once you were through it, Jason stared at you, pulling his fingers out, as he licked him clean, making sure to clean them up. 
Your mouth fell agape at the sudden removal of his fingers, but you moaned as you watched him lick his fingers, like it's the last thing he’ll ever try.
Jason stared at you, pulling off his body armor, and yanking his jeans off after. You never got sick of his body, and you love every part of his, You loved to kiss his scars, make him feel loved, and loved to worship the body he worked oh so hard for. You watched as he pumped his cock a few times, his tip red and swollen from being trapped for so long. You went to sit up reaching for his cock, before Jason pushed you back down, clicking his tongue at you. 
“No, you're just gonna lay there and take what I give you. You keep your hands to yourself and do not touch below my abs. If you had been good earlier, you'd get what you want, you did this to yourself.” He scolded, still pumping his cock, his body stuttering slightly as precum dripped from his tip.
You whined but listened, leaning back and keeping your legs spread, pouting as you looked at him, begging with your eyes.
Jason smiled, leaning down to capture your lips in a kiss, as he positioned himself at your entrance. “Good girl,” He praised, before sinking into you. As many times as the two of you fucked, neither of you would ever get used tot he initial sting. His girthy cock splitting and stretching you open, your fluffy walls hugging him each time he entered, it was a physical bliss for the both of you. The two of you both let your deep moans, harmonizing with each other,  You shuffled underneath him, getting adjusted, as he slowly began to pump. He bottomed out and filled you up each time, watching your face contort as you took him.
“F-Faster Jay,” You stuttered out, gripping his shoulders as you bit your lip.
Jason didn’t need to be told twice, he quickly grabbed your hips, and began to rock you against him, controlling the way your body moved as he filled you. He began to speed up, wet sounds and slaps filling the space of the room. You whined, clawing at his back. “More, more, fuck more please,” You spat, drooling over your words. Jason picked you up, turning you around. He shoved your face into the mattress, holding the back of your neck as your ass was arched in the air. With no warning, he slammed into you from behind, hitting you G-Spot as he fucked you in doggy. Jason slaps your ass a few times, pinching it and watching it get red from his hits. You drooled and groaned all over the mattress, nails clawing at the sheets below you. Jason bent behind you, getting closer to you ear, as he other hand came around to abuse your slit once more. 
“This what you need? Need me to fuck you like your mine, make you cum over and over again, till you remember I’m the one in control?” Jason whispered in your ear between grunts and moans. His pace never faltered, and his hand continued to roll over your swollen bud.
Your eyes roll to the back of your head, as all you can do is nod and moan and babble, as Jason splits you open with his cock. You nod relentlessly, letting him use and mark you. You claw at the sheets, trying to sit up as Jason keeps you pinned to the mattress, yet you feel another orgasm approaching you. “Gonna, gonna cum again- fuck, fuck I’m cumming!” You scream under him, clenching around him. Jason continues to pump, his hand leaving your clit, as he picks you up again, positioning with him on his back, you now straddling him.
You nod and drool as Jason holds your arms down at your sides, him doing all the work as he pumps from under you, using his hips and arms to bounce you up and down. You looked down at his cock bouncing in and out of you, it was glistening with your slick but he still hadn’t cum yet.
You whine, rolling your head as you're covered in sweat, spit, and your cum. You’re over-stimulated, clenching around him, and still feeling like your orgasming. “Jay, fuck it’s just so much.” You whined
Jason stopped, leaving you just sitting on his cock, dick-drunk in a haze. He laughed, grabbing your face so you looked at him. “Oh, if you think that's all you're getting, you've got a long night ahead of you baby..I’m not done yet.” He taunted, before starting his assault on your pussy once again.
Jason thinks that people who reblog/like the fics they enjoy deserve a good time too ;)
also comment if you want a p.2 with fluff and aftercare!
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mrsriddlenott · 2 days ago
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okay I just need pussydrunk mattheo 🥵
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It is honestly embarrassing how long this has been in my drafts unfinished(literally a few days over a year🤦‍♀️) I have been awol for so long but I have been GOIN through it y’all. I think I can finally at least try and actually come back to this blog. I love writing so much and I hate when it just isn’t fun anymore. And when I saw this I actually got excited to finish it so let’s see how it goes. Please correct mistakes and give feedback
Warnings: suggestive content but not actually full smut, public oral(f!receiving), heavy petting, play argument/kinda roleplay, some teasing.
{masterlist}
~Needy~
To plenty of people having a needy boyfriend would be the end of the world. But when that boyfriend is Mattheo Riddle, who seems to have an unnaturally high labido and stamina, it’s more of a pro rather than a con.
But what comes with needy is clingy. Mattheo just needs his hands on you whenever he can. You weren’t complaining but he certainly was. There was just too much time out of the day that he couldn’t touch you. So me made sure to cut thay time down as much as he could.
“Come oooon Baby” Mattheo groaned as he tugged you towards an empty, shadow filled corridor, “Just think about it, how many days a week do we have Potions, and how many weeks are in a term, how many terms in a school year….we can miss one hour of Potions Baby it’ll be fine. Plus you’re the smartest, prettiest, hottest person at this school you’ve got options for you future.”
“Um first of all,” You start, crossing your arms across your chest, poking your hip out to make Mattheo groan out loud as he restrains himself from touching you, “This will be the fourth time we missed Potions so far this term, and second of all who said I was worried for my future, nuh uh Baby I’m worried about yours.”
“Merlin you’re sexy when you’re being all bossy”Mattheo sighs, stepping closer to you and fanning your face with his breath, “I don’t care about my future as long as you’re in it, I need to keep you excited don’t I Princess?” He laughs out as he watches your resolve melt away, moving his hand up to grip your waste.
“That’s no fair.” You pout, desperately trying to hold a straight face as you continue, “You know you’re not allowed to call me Princess in an argument, you always win with that.” Mattheo sighs dramatically and steps even closer to you, breathing your air as he holds your hip tightly, tugging you into him aggressively.
“I’m so sorry baby, please forgive me,” He begs dramatically, smiling before dipping his head into the crook beside your shoulder to trace small pecks across your collarbone, forcing a moan to slip past your lips despite your pretend protests.
“How could I ever forgive you for such a lapse Mattheo,” you smile at how fast he halts his mouths assault of your collarbone giving you time to slip your fingers into his raven curls, giving them a tug to force his eyes up to yours, “You know, I can think of something you can do to earn my forgiveness.”
“What?” He rasps out, his breath caught in his chest at the feeling of your hand in his hair and the other slowly slipping down his chest at an agonizing pace, “What can I do to make you feel better Baby, I’ll do anything for you, you know that.” His voice his breathy and desperate, sending heat down your abdomen as your thighs squeeze together subconsciously. At the gentle shove to his shoulder, Mattheo knew exactly what you wanted, smirking as you looked down to him where he leant into you with those pretend innocent eyes. Mattheo fell to his knees immediately, his hands tracing their way under your skirt while his eyes stay on yours.
“Is this what you’re asking for…Princess?” Mattheo asks, smirking as he gains dominance from below you, “You want me to make you feel good?….But Baby what about Potions, we-we can’t miss class i-it’s impo-“ You cut off his teasing with a tug to his hair and small sigh at the feeling of his hand ghosting across your underwear. Mattheo groans, his eyes falling into the back of his head as your fingers tighten in his hair.
“Okay okay, I’ve got you Princess.” He laughs breathlessly as his fingers tug your underwear down your legs, allowing you to step out of them before he shoves them in his pocket with a wink. In a flash Mattheo has his lips on you, his head vanishing under your skirt, his hand trailing upward to squeeze at your chest through your button up, the other gripping your thigh to give you support as you begin to wobble.
“Oh fuck Mattheo,” You moan loudly before clamping your hand over your mouth, almost forgetting your very public location at the feeling of Mattheo’s tongue meticulously swirling around your clit. His chuckle from below almost pisses you off enough to fight for dominance but as though to wipe your mind of it, Mattheo flattens his tongue and leaves a strip up your heat, making you whimper into your hand and bite your skin to prevent getting caught.
You shake as Mattheo’s fingernails dig into the skin of your thigh while it wobbles, unsteady as you begin to lose balance at the fast pace of Mattheo’s tongue, “Fuck Baby, can you stand or do I need to hold you?” He chuckles against you at your whine of protest, not wanting him to stop even for a second. Mattheo quickly tugs your thigh over his shoulder, allowing him to gain more access, speeding up his actions, moaning at your taste and the thought of you coming on his face as you depend on him to hold you steady. Your head falls back against the stone wall, your eyes rolling backward as your hand falls to his shoulders for balance not caring anymore about your volume. Your little whimpers and squeaks drive him insane below you, he knows your close, he can feel it.
Without warning Mattheo shifts lower, shoving his tongue into you, lowering his hand from your chest in a flash and using his thumb to stimulate your clit as his tongue moves in and out of you, matching his own pace and groaning as he feels your legs begin to shake for him. Your moans become screams as you release on his tongue, falling into his hold while he rises to look at your post-orgasm face he loves so much.
“Good thing we did this during class, someone might have heard otherwise.” Mattheo says simply with a laugh as you weakly smack at his broad shoulder.
~~~~
Pretty short compared to others I have but I just really wanted to start posting again. I’m probably gonna be cleaning out my drafts and trying to get them out even old ones ppl probably aren’t waiting on anymore to try and get back into a groove on here.
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hello-sweetheart · 3 days ago
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You know that trope where Person A thinks Person B is just being nice but they’re actually flirting. What about the opposite? Person A misreading their behavior and being the only one falling impossibly in love.
Clumsy in Love Part 3
Adiel had already gone to bed by the time he heard frantic knocking at his door. He stumbled through his apartment hazy with sleep, a hand stretched out to guide him through the dark until he reached his living room. The lights were blinding to his eyes.
“Adiel?” Came the muffled voice through the through the door. “Can…can I come in please?”
Dread washed over him quick and ugly, churning his stomach as his shaking hands unlatched the locks. Had something happen? Was Eddie hurt? Or—
He hesitated to unlock the last latch. Was Eddie drunk? No, he shook his head. Eddie doesn’t… he doesn’t drink, not like that. He doesn’t get…like that. Not like his ex.
“Adiel?” It was softer now, and he finally opened the door.
“Eddie?”
His voice was still rough from his abrupt wakening, but he looked over quickly checking for anything really. When he couldn’t find anything, his shoulders finally loosened.
“Hey,” Eddie smiled a little crooked and forced, “I’m sorry for waking you.”
“It’s cool. Come inside, are you okay? It’s,” a brief glance at his digital watch, “it’s two in the morning, Eddie.”
They shuffled inside and Adiel locked the door behind him. Guiding Eddie to the kitchen as he flicked on a couple more lights.
“I know, I know. I’ve just been,” he gestured vaguely and his rings caught the warm tones of the lights, “driving around. For a while. Uh, my heads just been a mess today and I…”
“And?”
Adiel encouraged him softly.
Eddie, always so unapologetically himself and taking up space in any room he’s in, looks unsure. He looks away, eyes a bit hooded from exhaustion, he thinks. Sadness, maybe.
He has to guide Eddie’s hand away from where he’s begun to wear down his thumb nail again. A habit that he sure Eddie’s picked up from him.
“And, I wanted to see you.”
His heart might actually sore inside him.
“Well,” he offers a cheeky grin and spins on his toes until he’s facing him again, “you have me.”
“Yeah, I have you.” The words carry weight to them. Adiel’s cheeks flush with warmth.
“You do. Come, let’s go put you bed. You don’t have to say anything until you’re ready.”
Having Eddie is his bed always feels like the world to him. It’s one of the only moments when his mind is able to still, thoughts silent. All his worries are gone when he has Eddie in his arms.
It not just when they’re being intimate (‘canoodling’, he says because he likes to make Ed groan), it’s about having him in his space and still feeling safe. Safer, even. And it’s unlike anything he’s been able to feel in his past relationships.
Safe. Being open and vulnerable and still falling asleep next to someone. Eddie coming here at night, because he feels safe enough to be vulnerable, too.
Adiel always falls too fast and too hard, but he just feels so much. Too much. And they only had a couple months together now, but he can feel himself falling. Not there yet. But he could, soon. It’s as if he’s bracing for the impact of it all.
“You’re still awake.”
“I need to tell you something. I can’t sleep until I do.”
Adiel hums.
“Earlier today, or, yesterday I guess. I was at Steve’s house and… he kissed me.”
The night is so silent, even in the city.
“Did, did you want to kiss him?”
“He kissed me. He surprised me and…I didn’t kiss him back. I wouldn’t do that to you, Adiel.”
He gathers Eddie in his arms, his chest against Eddie’s back, and burrows deep into the nape of his neck.
“I know, baby. I’m sorry that he kissed you.”
“He’s my friend. An unlikely one, but one of the best that I have. I don’t want to lose that. I can’t. I, I owe him my life.”
“No.”
“I do. I’m only here because of—“
“I know what he did for you and I’m so grateful you’re still here, Eddie. I don’t want to imagine a world with you. But if he’s as good as a friend as you’ve said he is, then he wouldn’t want you to feel like you owe him anything.”
“You’re right. I don’t mean it that way. Just that… he’s important to me. And I don’t want to let it go.”
“Give him time then, and space. He’ll need it right now and you’ll have to respect his boundaries.” Like he didn’t respect ours. He nuzzles deeper and breathes in his scent it’s thick with sandalwood.
“I feel like it’s my fault that he feels this way.”
“Can’t make anyone feel anything they don’t want to.”
“When did you get so wise?” He laughs.
“Hush, baby. We both need some sleep.”
“You’re the best among men, Adiel. Goo’night.”
“Night, Ed.”
He’s burning with jealousy, but he can keep it tucked away. Steve means something to him. And that’s what he’s afraid of right now.
He tightens his arms around Eddie, being selfish with his warmth.
I just found you, he kisses his shoulder, I can’t lose you.
———
Something changes after that night. It’s not noticeable right away, his friends don’t notice, but Adiel does. He notices everything about Eddie, even the finer details.
He doesn’t mention Steve anymore, at least not to him. And Adiel doesn’t know if this is a good thing or not.
He didn’t notice how much Eddie talked about Steve until he stopped.
He has these moments in between their kisses and conversations where he… gets lost, for a lack of a better word. His eyes carry this far away look and Adiel know he’s not here with him.
He kisses him back to him until his eyes are alight again and smiling enough to show off his one crooked canine.
When will his kisses stop being enough? Will Eddie simply float away from him, like a cherished red balloon escaping the grasp of a small child, only able to watch it go.
He tries to hold onto him tighter. His hand interlocked with his, squeezing and rubbing his thumb on Eddie’s knuckles just to make sure he doesn’t float away.
He doesn’t want to hold too tight that he suffocates him, but he can’t help it.
I can’t lose you, I…
There are many things he loves about Eddie that he can list off, but the one this that makes him different is how he doesn’t care about Adiel’s strangeness.
His timid demeanor that he never grew out of. His constant need to be reassured. His laugh, more of giggle that gets him strange looks. His restless fingers and chewed, painted nails down to a stump.
All things he’s been called effeminate for.
Targeted, pushed aside, excluded…
Eddie takes all these traits and kisses them one by one. Nurturing them. Loving them. Seeking them.
Eddie makes him feel like man, instead of questioning his masculinity. He’s even painted his nails for him and didn’t bat an eye when he asked for baby purple instead of the assumed black.
“Baby, do you mean lavender?”
“Oh my god, shut up! If it’s called baby pink why can’t it be called baby purple. Stop laughing!”
Eddie makes him feel like it’s all okay. That he’s okay.
And everything, everything will be okay, too.
Until it wasn’t.
———
Eddie didn’t stop making him feel loved or cared for, but it felt different than from before that night. Today has feeling to it. Like the end.
He keeps stalling against the inevitable.
“Adiel—“
“Let’s watch movie? You can sleep here again and I’ll make breakfast for dinner,” because Eddie doesn’t like savory foods after dark, “I have a couple new tapes to choose from—“
“Baby.”
Baby purple.
No, no, no. His hands are shaking again.
“You know, don’t you? That it’s the end for us?Adiel, I wish we could’ve been different,” He holds his shaking hands and Adiel focuses on them instead of meeting his eyes. It’s been a long time coming, doesn’t mean he feels prepared.
“Have you been… seeing him?” It’s the first time since that night that they’ve talked about Steve. His hands are squeezed tight.
“No! God, I would never go behind your back. I haven’t talked to him since then, I promise. I’ve been giving him space, trying to let him come around on his own time, but…”
“But you miss him.”
His world is falling apart.
“Have you been in love with him this whole time? That day in the music store, did you like him then too?”
“No. Maybe? I, I really don’t know. I don’t think I ever saw him that way. I didn’t even consider it a possibility until he—“
“Yeah, until he fucking kissed you!” He pulls his hands away and doesn’t miss the fact that Eddie didn’t try to hold onto them.
“Until he kissed me.”
Why must it hurt this much?
It always hurts so much.
His body is shaking but he avoids any attempts of Eddie trying to comfort him. Can’t bear the way he looks at him scared and careful like he’s trying to calm a wild animal.
Everything was perfect.
They could’ve been perfect,
If it hadn’t been for one fucking kiss from some guy that can’t stay out of people’s relationships.
“He’s stealing you away and you’re letting him!”
“He’s not stealing me, Adiel! You can’t steal people away like that, they have to be willing to go.”
“Willing to leave me?”
“I’m sorry.”
“I love you, Eddie.” It’s a dirty trick to say it here and now, but it doesn’t make it any less true. Adiel needs to say it. Needs Eddie to know.
Some sick part of him enjoys the hurt look that crosses Eddie’s face, but it’s not close to feeling vindicated.
“I fucking love you, Ed.” He whispers it this time.
“I… I loved you, Adiel. Wish I could’ve loved you longer.”
“It’s been months since he kissed you. He might not even like you that way anymore.” Might not love you the way I can. “I don’t understand, how can you throw away everything for a maybe?”
“It wouldn’t be fair for any of us if I stayed. I know I’ve been absent minded, know that you could tell that I didn’t have my all in us anymore. You deserve someone who doesn’t make feel that way. Adiel. I don’t have any right to ask, but can you you try to understand—“
“Then don’t ask! You shouldn’t! I don’t want to hear about what you think that I deserve. Just, just leave. Please.”
“…Will you be okay?”
“No, but I’ll have to be. Go, Eddie, I’m not yours to worry over anymore.”
He doesn’t know how long he stays on the kitchen floor. His head hurts, his heart feels empty. His nose won’t stop running no matter how many times he wipes away the snot with his sleeve.
He must look like a mess. Look unattractive.
Adiel feels unattractive.
He didn’t even notice the sound of someone unlocking the door and step in until familiar arms are around him. He’s engulfed immediately in warmth and the scent of coconut. Vanilla.
A humorless laugh escapes him, Eddie must have called her.
“I love him, Tiff. There’s something wrong with me.”
“Oh babe, no. No. Nothing is wrong with you.” She rocks him in her arms, tucking him into her neck. Her signature afro puffs tickle his nose. The same hairstyle she’s kept since they were kids.
“Just haven’t met the one right?”
“You’ll find them, babe. You still have us. You still have me. Now and until the next life.”
“‘Til the next life, Tiff.” A pinky promise as old as time.
He curls further into her and not for the first time he wishes that they were straight. That they could feel that way about each other.
Life would have been so much easier.
They would have had much less heartbreaks, and maybe, he wouldn’t have been so broken.
Part 2 < 💛 > Part 4
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ylangelegy · 22 hours ago
Text
lost in translation ♾️ minghao x reader.
“being good to you is the easy part.” # day eight of (the)8 days of minghao. ♡ happy birthday, minghao!
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☆ includes: translator/interpreter!reader, idiots in love, yearning!!!, hurt/comfort, confessions. alcohol consumption, reader gets a [minor] surgery. mandarin & other languages are all courtesy of google translate. word count: 25,800+ (damn.)
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Minghao learned early on that there were words that didn’t always have a translation.
He had grown up with Shenyang Mandarin, only to have to learn Korean, English, and even some Japanese. It was always such a frustrating feeling, to have the Mandarin word at the tip of his tongue then to need to swallow it or substitute it.
He’s never felt that way with you, at least.
You, PLEDIS’ skilled, multilingual interpreter-slash-translator. Minghao remembers the day you came in, nine years ago. How he had felt a spark of hope when you slid into the dialect that was all-too familiar to him. Finally, Minghao had thought.
He had started off as your pupil, your tutee for Korean. Over time, it blossomed into genuine friendship. He can count on one hand the things that he has in Korea. The group. The fans. The other Chinese idols. And you.
It’s comfortable and easy with you. It’s always been. It’s why Minghao is fine with seeking you out at the company, with sliding into the seat next to you even though you’re working on something on your laptop. Checking subtitles for a SEVENTEEN video, it seems.
He waits until you’ve noticed him before he holds out the book he had been reading. It's a Korean novel. Almond by Sohn Wonpyung. He points to a particular phrase— 눈치가 빠르다— before speaking, but the words aren’t in Korean.
“Is there a Mandarin word for this?” he asks in Mandarin, his voice taking on the lower pitch of the dialect. His eyebrows knit together in a look of utter concentration. “Or is this one of those untranslatables?”
You pull out your earphones, a mild look of amusement on your face at Minghao’s sudden appearance. When you realize what he’s asking of you, a small huff of laughter escapes, but you concede to looking at the book in his hands. You say the phrase under your breath, as if testing it out. 
“It’s not untranslatable,” you say, sliding right into Mandarin to match Minghao. “The literal translation is observant or perceptive. But in Korean contexts, it’s meant to describe— I suppose, comprehension that something is going on with a friend, or a family member. Like, ah—”
You pause. And then you code switch, again, this time, to English. “A gut feeling?”
“Ah.”
Minghao’s expression clears as comprehension filters across his face, his mouth forming that little ‘o’ shape as he repeats the phrase as well. “A gut feeling... okay, like intuition.”
He pulls his legs up on to the chair, resting his chin on his knee. “Do you think it's something that is universal? A gut feeling. Is there a word for that in Mandarin?”
You’re far too used to Minghao getting philosophical, to him pressing for more than the first answer. “Gut feeling in Mandarin... zhíjué?” you offer. 
“Zhíjué,” Minghao repeats quietly, mulling the word over. There’s something satisfying and soothing about rolling the syllables on his tongue, the way he does it. The way they come from the back of his throat— a language that's as intimate as his mother's lullabies when he was a child.
He lets the word rest in his mouth for a while— zhíjué, gut feeling— before he looks back at you, his chin tilting forward in a nod. He gives you a little smile, appreciative.
"Mhm," he says. "That’s close enough."
You chuckle before slipping right back into Korean. It’s a dizzying back-and-forth between at most three languages, at any given time. The two of you have been called out for it, but Minghao secretly enjoys the challenge. 
"I’ve been meaning to check that out from my neighborhood's library," you note as you tap at the spine of Minghao's copy of Almond. He privately marvels at how your voice sounds more mellifluous in your first language, almost missing the question you pose. “How are you liking it so far?”
He looks down at the book in his lap, thumbing through the pages idly. “It’s good,” he answers simply. There’s a pause, but it's not quite awkward. It's something else... an afterthought. The next words are quieter than the last. “A bit sad.”
“That’s what most reviewers have said about it,” you muse, leaning back against your chair to stretch your legs underneath you. “Maybe I’ll finally pick it up this weekend.”
Minghao doesn’t look at you directly when you start to stretch out, when your shoulders roll forward. Instead the focus of his eyes is on the book on his lap, but his mind is most definitely not on the words on the pages.
When you mention picking it up that weekend, he nods in silent agreement, the movement a bit stiff. And then, in that same beat: “Have you gone to the doctor about your back pain?”
The question is quiet but pointed, with just a hint of concern to his voice. He spots all the tells of you preparing to lie to him— the tick in your jaw, your tongue peeking out between your clenched teeth. “Of course I have,” you lie smoothly. “It’s just your regular back pains that come with sitting in a chair a lot.”
“Hm.”
Even this late in the game, you still thought you could lie to Minghao. And maybe you could, and he would let it slide, in favor of being considerate and polite.
But only for a bit, because he knows you haven't seen a doctor about the back pain that started recently. Knows that you’re being a hypocrite, always asking him to take care of himself when you aren’t even doing the same for yourself.
He’s not entirely surprised, admittedly. You’ve always been so focused on your work and on taking care of others that it was sometimes hard to think that you focused on yourself. Not that Minghao is one to talk, when it comes to taking time for his own health. But this was you.
He sighs, just barely, before he reaches over to nudge you on the shoulder, like he would do with Jun or Soonyoung or any of the other members. “Liar.”
A sound between a huff and a laugh escapes you, but then you raise your palms in a show of surrender. 
“I haven't really had the time to go to the doctor,” you admit sheepishly. “There’s been a lot of content to translate. And I’ve been preparing for the group's Japan showcase next week.”
Minghao knows you well enough to know that you'd probably work yourself till you dropped, if you had the chance. The thought makes him want to roll his eyes.
“Mm,” he responds, his eyes narrowing as he crosses his arms across his chest. “You can stop working for ten minutes to go to a clinic. You have enough money. And even if you don’t, I could—”
He cuts himself off, biting the inside of his cheek. The words nearly slipped.
— take you to one, he had meant to say. 
The offer is on the tip of his tongue; the thought of you walking around with such bad back pain that you could barely walk without hobbling having pissed him off. Some part of him, some tiny selfish part, is holding him back from saying anything.
Maybe he just wants to see what you do. If you’ll finally do something about it, if only because he’s asked you to care for yourself for once.
There’s a flicker of surprise on your expression, though it's quickly smoothed out by something more akin to affection. Minghao had always been the thoughtful kind. It had taken some time for him to warm up to you, but around three or so years into your friendship, you’d started becoming a recipient to his quiet care and compassion.
“I’ll get a proper checkup once the Japan showcase is over,” you finally concede, if only to put his mind at ease. “The whole thing. A CT scan and all that.”
Minghao let out a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding out in silent relief, his shoulders dropping. When you promise that you'll go for a checkup when the Japan showcase is over, part of him wants to say I don’t believe you or I’m coming with you or even I’ll take you there myself.
But he decides to keep his mouth shut. There's no point in arguing, unless he wants to give you even more of a headache. He huffs with faux annoyance. "I’ll hold you to that," he tells you.
Minghao’s little show of annoyance does little to unnerve you, especially when you know it’s just that. A show. You shake your head with amusement before glancing at the table in front of you, where your laptop rests, forgotten. 
“I still have to finish this, though,” you say almost ruefully to Minghao, tilting your head slightly as you look back at him. “Do you have any other schedules for the rest of the day?”
“I don’t,” he says. “We have a free day today. My only plans were to bother you.”
Minghao’s definition of bothering was a lot different from, say, what Mingyu or Jeonghan would call being a bother. No, for Minghao, bothering you entailed simply being in your space— mostly in silence.
“Knock yourself out, then,” you say with a slight wave of your hand, essentially giving Minghao the carte blanche to stick around, maybe read, as you finish off your work. “I'll probably be done in half an hour. Let's grab something to eat after?”
“Thirty minutes,” he agrees. “And I get to pick the place.”
For the next half hour, Minghao makes an effort to not bother you in the way most of the other members would. No unnecessary comments, no sudden pokes with a pen or a random finger tapping at your shoulder.
He simply sits there, legs crossed out in front of him, one hand flicking through the pages of the book he was reading earlier, the other hand on his knee. Every so often, he glances up, just a brief glance to check if you’re still swamped with work.
It’s hard for anybody, even the most unobservant of people, to miss the sight of the two of you  sharing the couch in the company lounge. Two such different people— you, with your cool temperament and soft features, and Minghao, with his sharp eyes and his sharper tongue.
And yet, the sight of the two of you is more familiar than anything else. Anyone who’s been around the company long enough has seen the two of you sitting almost shoulder to shoulder. Quiet. Serene. At utter peace with each other's company.
There are others who want to interrupt, but the intensity of Minghao’s gaze as he glances up briefly is enough to discourage them. It’s a silent challenge and a promise that they better not disturb the two of you.
By the end of the thirty minutes, you’re nearly done with the video subtitles, and Minghao is about five or so pages from finishing his book. The book has been set aside on the table by then, his gaze now focusing on your work, rather than the story in his hands.
You hammer out the last of your subtitles with a mumble of “I’m done, I’m done.” 
You shut your laptop with a slight snap, groaning slightly as you sink back against the back of the couch. “That was rough,” you huff as you press the heels of your hands to your eyes. “My French is getting rusty.”
“You say that about every language,” he points out. He watches you for a moment more before he reaches over, fingers wrapping around one of your wrists to tug at your arm. “Come here.”
This wasn’t the first time he’d used touch to get your attention. Minghao wasn’t the most outwardly tactile, but he had his moments. Touch was an easy, unspoken thing; it required no language, it spoke volumes.
This was one of those rare, intimate, moments of his. The moments where he let his guard down, the walls around him falling away. He tugs again, pulling you a little closer to him.
“Come here,” he says again. The word comes out in Mandarin, his fingers gently squeezing around your wrist, his other hand going to your hip to encourage you to lean in.
“So demanding,” you huff in the same language. 
You’re complaining, but there isn’t any bite or any real annoyance in your tone. If you were really bothered, you’d pull your arm away and snap at him in Korean. Instead, you go along with what he’s doing, allowing him to pull you closer, even as you continue to grumble under your breath in Mandarin.
You give too much, he thinks silently, as his hand moves up from your hip to gently press your head into his shoulder, his arm wrapping around your waist instead. You let me have too much.
It’s a compromising position, especially in the company lounge. No other idol would be caught dead cozying up to a staff member like this, but Minghao was just a little bit above it all and HR had long since given up on lecturing you both about propriety.
Your hand absentmindedly rests over his knee, the platonic touch hidden underneath the table. You stick to Mandarin as you hum “This is nice.”
Minghao can’t help but agree with your words, his eyes fluttering close as he rests his cheek on the top of your head. Even with a company full of people around you and a door that anyone could walk through at any second, the two of you are tucked away in your own little world. He hums in response to your words, his own hand moving slightly to lace his fingers through yours.
Despite the fatigue weighing down on you both, the two of you stay like that, tangled together on the couch in a way that's more akin to a couple than just friends.
Eventually, the silence and stillness between you two is broken by a gentle knock on the wood.
Minghao’s eyes flutter open; he lifts his head up slightly to glance towards the door. “It’s open,” he says, his voice not betraying that you’re tucked into his side or that his hand is tangled with yours.
The door creaks open a crack, and Jeonghan peeks in. His eyebrows shoot up slightly. His mouth opens and closes, as if to say something, but you can see a knowing look pass across his face. “Ah,” he says, and it almost sounds like he’s laughing.
You code switch to Korean, unsurprisingly. “Jeonghan,” you greet, raising your free hand to wave at the older boy. You make no real effort to disentangle from Minghao. If anything, the fact that it's just one of his members makes it easier for you to just relax a bit more. "Hao kept me company while I was working."
"I can see that," Jeonghan says with no shortage of amusement. He steps into the room, decisively closing the lounge door behind him. "I figured he'd be here."
Jeonghan takes a few steps closer to the couch before he halts, just a few steps away, his legs slightly apart and his arms folded over his chest. He looks between the two of you, his gaze drifting meaningfully from the arm wrapped around your waist, to the fingers still entwined with Minghao's.
“He's good at keeping company,” Jeonghan agrees, his head slightly tilted.
“Shut it,” Minghao grumbles in response, irritation obvious in his voice.
He doesn’t move his head or his arm wrapped around your waist. Instead, he raises his other hand— the one that’s still holding your hand— to give Jeonghan a gesture that clearly means for him to go away.
Jeonghan just laughs in response to the gesture, his eyes sparkling with amusement. “What, are you two lovebirds too busy for me?” he says, his tone deliberately saccharine. “I just wanted to tell you that the boys scheduled a game night later.”
Minghao glances down at the watch on his wrist, before looking back at the two of you. “What time?” he grumbles to Jeonghan, visibly displeased at the thought of having to disentangle from you. 
“In about an hour,” Jeonghan sing-songs. 
“Don’t be late,” he adds cheerfully, before promptly turning around and leaving the room.
“There goes our dinner plans,” you deadpan to Minghao once Jeonghan has left, although you don’t really sound upset about it. It’s more of a statement of a fact.
“Guess so,” he responds, his chin still resting on top of your head. Your hair is soft, and his fingers absently brush against the strands.
There’s a beat of stillness between the two of you, before he speaks again. “Sorry,” he murmurs, the word quiet and soft. He knows you’d probably been hoping to eat before going back to subtitles.
“No apologies necessary,” you say easily, because this was just sometimes the reality of our friendship. You always had a dozen other things pulling at us in different directions, and so a couple of stolen hours was always a welcome reprieve.
You give Minghao's hand a gentle squeeze. “Let's stay like this for— five more minutes,” you bargain, a slight smile tugging at your lips as you stare ahead. “And then we can pack up.”
“Five more minutes?” Minghao repeats, his voice low. He thinks over your words for a moment, before he lets out a soft sigh, his hand tightening around yours. “Okay.” 
There aren’t many moments when he isn't in control, or when he lets his guard down. But this— with you, with your soft hair and comfortable warmth, is something he can’t resist. He lets his chin rest on top of your head, the weight of his head resting against you. He closes his eyes, and simply lets himself breathe.
The minutes pass by in comfortable silence, the two of you still tangled together on the couch. For those few moments, Minghao has nothing to worry about and nothing to think about. He has no choreography to practice, no schedule to keep. 
Five minutes spin into seven, then ten. Neither of you are keen to pull away. At the fifteen-minute mark, you finally do try. “We’ve had more than five minutes,” you say against Minghao’s shoulder.
Minghao’s arm tightens around your waist, his fingers curling around your hip in a silent bid to keep you in place. He can feel the reluctance in your tone, the hesitation, and that’s what spurs him to be a little selfish.
He lets out a soft breath, his words a low, reluctant mumble. “Just... one more minute.”
“We have to go, xīngān,” you mutter absentmindedly.
It’s unfair, the way a single word in Mandarin sounds perfect in your voice. He doesn’t know if you’re even aware that you just called him darling— maybe it was a lapse in the switch to Mandarin, maybe it was intentional.
Either way, it doesn’t take more than a single moment for his heart to skip a beat, the sound of the word making something flutter and stir in his chest. His fingers involuntarily tighten around your hip.
“Okay,” he responds, his own voice coming out quieter than usual.
He does let go of you afterwards, the loss of your body heat making his hand feel a little cold. The couch feels noticeably larger and cooler without your side pressed against his, and he already misses the weight of your head against his shoulder.
Minghao tries very hard to look collected as he stands up from the couch, his face almost carefully neutral. His lips quirk up into the ghost of a smile before he offers you a hand to help you up as well.
He holds your hand a little longer than is necessary before letting go slowly. Silence drifts over the two of you as you make your way to the door, and for once, Minghao isn’t quite sure what to say. All he can think about is the single word you’d used— xīngān, in that warm tone of yours.
It’s an endearment he’s heard from friends, family, and fans. It’s a simple, innocent term. The only thing that makes it strange is that he’d never heard you use it for him until now.
He clears his throat, trying— and failing— to keep the quiet waver out of his voice. “Hey,” he says, the word falling from his lips a little more softly than he'd intended.
He pauses for a beat, as you turn to look at him questioningly. He doesn't know how to voice what he wants to say, so he opts to keep things as simple as possible.
“You called me xīngān,” he says point blank. 
For a moment, the silence drags on as you keep walking. "Xīngān," you repeat a little dumbly, your eyebrows furrowed as you try to remember how the word translates in. When it seems to dawn on you, you stop dead in your tracks. 
You’re speaking in Korean when you frantically wave your hands in front of you, your eyes slightly wider than before. “I’m sorry,” you say, panicked. “I think I was aiming for yīngjùn de. You know, ‘handsome.’ I don’t know why I called you—”
Minghao's shoulders nearly slump in disappointment. It’s a stupid, pointless feeling. It’s just a word, and a common endearment, at that— and yet he’s disappointed to learn that you were trying to say something else.
He gives a little scoff, not bothering to keep the petulance out of his voice. “Oh,” he responds, his hand lifting to rub absently at the back of his neck. “Damn.”
“Did you— like being called xīngān?” you ask, and then you try for the term in your smooth, easy Korean. “Yeobo?”
Minghao hesitates, the slightest hitch in his breath as you repeat the word in Korean.
The truth is a stupid, pointless one. The truth is that his heart almost jumped into his throat the moment he heard that single word, those two syllables. The truth is that he did like being called that. He liked being called darling. He liked it a lot, to be quite honest.
He gives an aborted nod, his gaze falling away from your face. “Maybe. A little.”
“In Korean or in Mandarin?” you prod. 
“Do you prefer yeobo,” you start, the Korean term rolling easily off your tongue. “Or xīngān?” Your Mandarin version is a little more hesitant, more reserved, but just a touch more sweeter.
Both, Minghao nearly blurts out, before he stops himself. He doesn't know which one it is he likes more— the sweet, gentle lilt of the Mandarin, or the smooth, almost-familiar Korean. All he knows is that the sound of being called ‘darling’ in your voice, in any language, makes something in his chest flutter and tighten.
He hesitates, but again— there's no point in being coy about it, is there? 
“Both,” he answers softly, his eyes lifting up to meet yours.
“Darling,” you test out— this time not in Mandarin or Korean, but in English. It's heavily accented and clumsy, but the sentiment is still the same. Minghao sucks in a breath, his heart skipping another beat. It's stupid, he’s stupid, but—
He likes how you sound, speaking English. He likes the way your words soften and drag, the way your tongue wraps around the syllables, the gentle flow of your sentences. It’s all so stupid, and yet his heart can't help but skip another beat as he listens to you speak.
The corners of his mouth lift slightly. “I like that one too,” he responds.
“In any language, huh?” you tease lightly, a light pink dusting your cheeks. The two of you begin to walk, again, because you do have places to be.
In an absentminded way, you begin to mumble the ways you know ‘darling’ is translated in other languages.
Spanish. Cariño. Portuguese. Querido. Italian. Tesoro. French. Chérie. German. Liebling.
If nothing else, Minghao has to admit that watching your cheeks flush— and hearing you speak all these other languages— is very distracting.
He’s still busy mentally storing away this new, intriguing tidbit of information that he's learned about himself, but he still can't help his mind from wandering at the sound of other languages falling from your lips. A few of them are familiar, having seen or heard them before, but some of them are entirely new.
Minghao can’t help his mind from dwelling on how good they sound when you say them.
"Wait— what about Arabic?" he asks, cutting into your little list.
It’s the only one he can think of. He just wanted to hear you say this one, too.
“I haven’t touched Arabic in ages,” you mutter distractedly. Minghao can’t help but silently laugh as he watches your facial expressions flicker in a series of micro-emotions, each one slightly different from the other. Frustration, confusion, a pinch of annoyance— and all of it over this little thing.
“I think it's maḥbūb,” you answer after a full moment's pause. Your nose scrunches up in mild frustration; the endearment is heavily accented in the language you don’t use often.
His laugh turns into a little scoff, before he finally just lets the laugh roll right out of his lungs. “You’re cute when you’re frustrated,” he tells you fondly, the words falling from his mouth before he can help himself.
Shit.
He'd planned on saying that, but not so— casually. So off-handedly, without a thought to the meaning behind the sentiment. It’s a little much, and yet he can't take the words back now that they’re out there. Thankfully, you take it in stride. 
“And you’re cute for liking to be called darling,” you tease right back.
The words hit Minghao square in the chest like one of your punches. He’s glad you’re a few paces ahead of him so you can’t see the way his mouth parts slightly, the way he nearly stumbles. He’s thankful for the few beats of silence before you pipe up once more.
“I think I’ll stick to xīngān,” you commit.
And just like that, he’s breathless again.
He’s a sucker for that term, the way it rolls off your tongue. The way you choose it, like it's the easiest, most obvious choice in the world. “Xīngān,” he finds himself echoing, his voice softer, breathier than he’d meant it to be.
The sound of it leaves a warm, pleasant feeling in his chest. He likes the safety of the word, the way it makes something in his chest flutter. He can’t help the slight smile from tugging at his lip.
“I like the way you say it,” he admits, no longer bothering to keep up the charade of nonchalance.
“I’ll say it more, then,” you muse.
Minghao isn’t even fully convinced that you realize that this is flirting. He’d always gotten that feeling, that you don't always notice when something turns into that sort of casual teasing. He knows you can flirt; he’s witnessed some of your flirtations personally and he’s heard plenty of stories from the others.
But this sort of thing— this banter, the way you tease him with a casual sweetness in your voice— it’s new flirting territory. It’s something he's never experienced in your presence.
He follows you silently to the doors of the company, his heart pounding in his chest. The two of you walk side-by-side, your hips and shoulders nearly brushing with every two steps.
Neither of you bother to slow down as you near your inevitable separation. There isn’t a point, after all. Why draw out the goodbyes?
Before he loses the confidence, Minghao reaches out to snag your wrist. He can only hope that you’re less oblivious than he’s afraid you are. 
“Hey,” he calls you back, his voice just a touch breathless. “You free this weekend?”
You tilt your head to one side, only momentarily thrown off. It wasn’t unnatural for you to meet with the boys when they didn’t have a schedule. Sometimes, it was a language lesson; other times, it was a spontaneous hangout. It was always discreet, never anything to really read in to.
You and Minghao have had your fair share of escapades. Chinese takeout on the floor of your apartment, trips to a local library. They’re few and far between, but always welcome.
“I’m free Saturday evening. I have to work in the morning, and I have a family thing on Sunday,” you answer. “What’s up?”
Minghao feels the slight tension in his shoulders loosen at your answer. It’s not a no, not when it comes with a little extra clarification, as though you had been expecting something of a meetup anyway.
He drops the grip on your wrist, his fingers loosening just enough that you can pull away if you want. “Do you want to—” he starts, the words catching in his throat. Is it just him, or is the hallway warm? “Do you want to go to the movies?”
“The movies? Sure. What did you want to watch?" you inquire, your head tilting further as your curiosity is piqued.
The overhead lights catch the soft, sharp lines of your face, illuminating the features that Minghao knows like the back of his hand. The gentle tilt of your chin, the way you’re slightly shorter than he was, the way your hair frames your face in a messy but unfussy way— as though you didn’t try, but the effect was pleasing nonetheless.
It’s an effect that isn't lost on Minghao, that leaves something warm and fond twisting in his chest. He struggles to get a hold of himself.
“There's a film festival,” he says. “An international film festival, over in Gwangjin.”
If Minghao were a weaker man, he would have beamed at your reaction— the excitement in your voice, the way you reached out to squeeze his wrist in turn.
“That sounds fun,” you say happily. “I’d love to go.”
He knew you were passionate about languages, about cultures— one of the reasons you two have gotten on so well, as you’re the only person he’s ever met who shares that sort of enthusiasm. The only person who understands it in a way that doesn’t feel too much.
He gives you a little flicker of a smile before he answers. “Good.” 
There's a beat of silence as he contemplates his next few words— and what exactly he was about to propose. “You know…” he finally says, his tone just a little hesitant. “There's a… there's a film that I really wanted to see. In the festival, I mean.” 
“It’s in Mandarin,” he quickly clarifies, the words tumbling from his mouth in a way that feels a little too much like panic. “Um— will your Mandarin be up to it? No subtitles.”
“I’ll be up for it,” you assure Minghao laughingly. “If I miss anything, I guess I’ll just have to ask you.”
Ask him? The idea— the mere implication that you’d be leaning in, closer, to ask him. That you’d be needing something, some sort of clarification, a better context.
The way you'd need him.
And perhaps it was obvious, the way you and he were constantly switching back and forth— him with his Mandarin and your Korean and English, to fill in the blanks. But the words still set something loose in his chest, to know that he would be there to help you if you needed it.
“Yeah,” he says, once he finally manages to remember how to speak. “Yeah, you can ask me.”
As you begin to step away, you speak up. “It’s a date, then,” you say casually, still painfully unheeding to the implications of everything. “Will you pick me up or should I meet you there, xīngān?”
Minghao has never felt more simultaneously grateful and betrayed by your lack of awareness.
Because how could you be so casual, how could you just drop that right in front of him— calling it a date, calling him ‘darling’— as though it was nothing more than just another hangout? It leaves him reeling in a way that makes it impossible to respond.
He can only offer a nod, his throat dry, as one hand lifts in a half-wave. “I’ll pick you up,” he says, his brain lagging behind with the rest of his body.
You give a small wave back, your smile just as bright and friendly as the rest of you. This was going to be a thorn in Minghao's side, it seemed. Your brain wasn’t good at half measures. You needed clarity, needed straightforwardness to confront abstract feelings.
You disappear through the revolving front doors of the company, leaving Minghao in the company lobby that suddenly feels all-too warm. His phone pings in his pocket; a text from Jun.
You're late to game night, his member teases. Get away from the love of your life and get your ass over here. ㅋㅋㅋ
Because of course Jeonghan had tattled to all the other boys where Minghao had been. He rolls his eyes as he glances down at the screen, tapping out a quick response.
I'm coming. Don't cheat.
He glances up and back at the glass revolving doors, knowing full-well that you're already on the street at this point.
Minghao, for all his bluntness, has suddenly found himself in a situation where all he can do is beat around the bush.
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Minghao arrives outside your apartment building on time, his hands shoved deep in his pockets against the early evening chill. His heart is pounding in his chest, the nervous energy buzzing in his veins.
He had dressed up. He had put on cologne. He was taking you to a film festival. What could possibly happen that would go wrong?
It's a thought that is interrupted when a horn beeping snaps Minghao's attention away from his inner thoughts, as he straightens and glances down the street. There's no one parked on your street, no one walking down the sidewalk. He takes a step forward, peering across to the other side of the street— and there you are, stepping out of the building.
It takes everything he's got to keep a straight face. It feels like something out of a drama, and he's still not entirely sure he's not dreaming.
The fact that you're dressed up too is not lost on him. Damn it, of course you'd look good to him, no matter what you'd chosen to wear.
Minghao straightens as you draw closer, suddenly not quite knowing what to do with his hands. Does he pull you in for a hug? Offer up a casual, friendly greeting?
He settles for a nod, shoving his hands further into the pockets of his jeans, doing his best not to stare. "Hey."
"Hey," you greet right back, flashing Minghao a dimpled smile. You give Minghao a once-over.
"You look nice," you say like it's the most casual observation in the world. 
The praise sets something loose in Minghao's stomach, his hands gripping his car keys a little tighter to try and keep them from shaking. "Thanks," he responds, somehow finding it in himself to step closer and unlock the car door for you. "You look good, too." 
Good doesn't even begin to cover it, he thinks as he goes to slide into the driver’s seat. 
"You got me nervous," you say as you pull the seat belt over yourself, suddenly slipping into Mandarin. "About the film having no subtitles, I mean. So I ended up brushing up on my Mandarin."
He lets out a small huff of a laugh that's bordering on a scoff. "Since when have you had to brush up on anything?" he responds in Mandarin as well, flicking on the turn signal and pulling the car out into the street. "Your Mandarin is perfect."
"I'm always studying. You know me," you muse, leaning forward slightly to fiddle with the knobs of Minghao's car radio. You’ve been in his passenger seat enough time to feel comfortable doing this; you settle on a station playing mostly Western indie songs.
"And my Mandarin always has room for improvement," you go on. "I'm still working on that C2-level proficiency."
Of course you weren't satisfied with just good; you had to go and be an overachiever. Minghao finds himself shaking his head at the thought of how your drive for excellence in everything was— for lack of any better word— admirable and adorable all at the same time.
"You're insane," he says under his breath, still so awed by self-imposed standards. "You really don't need to do that, you know. You're great the way you are."
"How is it that you're both goading and complimenting me at the same time?" you tease.
The way you speak sounds effortless and yet Minghao can pick up on the little moments where your tongue would just ever so slightly stumble. He could correct you, but God, he's never quite heard that same sound before.
In fact, he's suddenly very aware of just how different you two sound when you speak his mother tongue.
"It's called being a good friend," he responds, fighting the rising urge to say something else.
"You're a pain in the ass, but I love you, anyway," he continues, his hand settling on a knob on the center console to change the radio station to something with a bit more of a modern beat. You always had to listen to indie music.
As the sounds of some Top Fifties pop song filters through the car, you let out a snort of laughter and respond noncommittally to Minghao's jab. "Love you, too," you say with no shortage of sarcasm. The words, in Mandarin— wǒ yě ài nǐ— still sound soft and sweet and lilting, despite your best effort to sound mocking.
Minghao suddenly has to swallow against his very dry throat. He hadn't expected that response from you, not when the last time he had said those words to you was months and months ago during an argument between the two of you. A particularly stressful work week, a squabble that neither of you talk about anymore.
"You better," he manages to respond, his voice cracking ever so slightly on the second syllable of 'better'. He hopes it goes unnoticed.
That little stutter, that tiny stumble around the last syllable of 'better', was the only sign that betrayed the way Minghao's heart was beating out the wildest beat in his chest
He knows it's a sign of his own impending nerves when he turns the radio volume all the way up, drowning out any chance of conversation between the two of you for the rest of the ride to the venue.
Far too used to Minghao's pockets of peace, you pay no heed to the fact that the rest of the car ride is spent in companionable silence.You  only break it once Minghao is pulling up into the parking lot of the theater house.
"You should go ahead. I'll get us snacks," you offer delicately, this time in Korean. The reminder of how the two of you had to hide any sort of public interaction settles like a stone at the very bottom of Minghao's stomach, and yet he nods anyway, silently agreeing with the logic of your suggestion.
You ask, "Is there anything you want to eat?"
He lets out a soft sigh as he pulls the keys out of the ignition. "Popcorn," he finally responds, his eyes skimming over your form as you unclick the seatbelt to leave. "With M&Ms."
The familiar request makes a small smile tug at your lips. It was the same thing, still, that Minghao asked for after all these years of movie-watching. "Got it," you say, sliding out of his car. "I'll find you in a bit.”
Even through the closed car door and over the sound of the car radio turned up to its highest, he can still clearly hear the smile in your voice and it sets that now familiar thump in his chest into overdrive.
"Hurry up," he responds in all of his usual nonchalance, despite the fact that his eyes are still following your figure, taking in the way you carry yourself as you walk away.
Damn it, he's so gone for you.
Minghao's choice of seats are predictable as always. In the very back of the theater, to keep him away from possible prying eyes.
You settle into the seat at his right, carefully balancing the food you’d gotten the two of you. "I couldn't carry two popcorn buckets, so we'll have to share this big one," you whisper to him as you pass him his pack of M&Ms and a bottle of soda.
"Thanks,” he murmurs over the sound of advertisements playing over the big screen.
"I've heard a lot of good things about this film," you mumble. "No making fun of me if I cry."
"I would never," he replies, voice as light as yours.
Sure enough, the opening of the film has Minghao leaning forward on the edge of his seat, engrossed in the drama unraveling between the characters on-screen. It's like he was that sixteen year-old boy in the movie, struggling to find his place in the world.
He's all but quiet in his consumption of popcorn, a hand sneaking into the bucket at times to munch on a few pieces idly. A few times, when the food almost runs out— he accidentally brushes his fingers against yours. The touch is brief, accidental, but each time, his skin feels like it's singing, and he fights the impulse to grasp your hand altogether every time he reaches for popcorn.
He does notice, however, when you seem to encounter unfamiliar terms. His gaze flicks over to you as your lips wordlessly form the nickname they call the main character. Xiǎoshì.
It's a term, sure, but it's far more than that to him.
For him, it's a moment. A time in his life that was so brief, but one he remembers like it happened yesterday. A small part of him wants to tell you all about it, but he can't now. 
And so he settles on another form of communication. With your attention still on the screen, Minghao reaches over— and finally grasps your hand. Interlocking your fingers together.
As your fingers interlock with his, a part of him hopes that you don't pull away. He almost wants to look sideways at you, just so he can see your reaction— read your face as you focus on the movie in front of you, as your heart beats fast, loud, against your ribcage.
He doesn't dare to hope, though. He keeps his hand in yours, holding on tightly, as the movie continues to play out, the scenes getting more familiar to him.
The main character gets into a particularly nasty row with his mother about following his dreams, about leaving home, about wanting a better life than the one they had in their province. His gaze flinches slightly on the screen, at the familiar scene before him— and the memories, the emotions, that it all brings up in him.
It's a tense scene, spoken in the scathing language he'd grown up in, and you can tell the way it's affecting him. Instinctively, you reach your free hand over to gently press at the side of Minghao's head; a quiet invitation for him to rest his head on your shoulder.
Minghao takes you up on your invitation, the touch of your hand almost a command to him. He lets his head rest on your shoulder, not unlike a weary puppy. He can practically hear his mother's voice, in some parts of the argument playing out in the movie. He can hear his own words echoing in his ears— almost as if he himself was the one speaking on-screen.
He wants to stay in the moment, with you, in the darkened theater as the movie continues to play. He doesn't think he can tear his eyes away from the screen, just like how he feels like he can't let go of your hand.
But it's a movie— a coming-of-age one, at that— and so all ends well. The boy and his mother reconcile. The main character is not any older by the last part of the film, but he's wiser, and the whole thing ends with him looking out at the Beijing skyline, humming an old lullaby for comfort.
The credits roll. The lights stay off as they do, and you finally, finally, bring yourself to pull away from Minghao's shoulder.  
You keep your hand in his, though, as you let out a quiet, watery laugh. "Xu Minghao," you reprimand in Mandarin. "You took me to the saddest movie ever."
"I told you," he responds back lightly, in Mandarin, his own voice a little rough from trying to hold himself back just a bit. "My friend said it was a sad one, when he recommended it. And you said you were fine."
He squeezes your hand again, shifting in his seat so that he was facing you, a hint of teasing in his tired eyes.
Absent-mindedly, you rub your thumb on the back of his palm. "How did you like it?" you ask delicately, pitching your voice lower, still, despite no one being within your vicinity.  
Minghao's eyes soften a little at the tender gesture on your part. He feels the light, comforting motion of your thumb brushing against the back of his palm, and he lets out a small, shaky sigh of his own. "It was... a little difficult to watch," he admits, his voice quiet, his eyes focused on your interlocked hands between you.  
"Do you want to talk about it over dinner?" you offer, your smile just a touch rueful. "Or we could just... have dinner and not talk about it at all. Whichever works best for you."  
At your offer, a small, almost self-deprecating smile quirks at the corner of Minghao's lips. He squeezes your hand one more time. "Dinner, yes. Talking, no."
The walk back to the car is a quiet one. Once you’re in your seats, Minghao puts the burden of deciding on you. 
"There's this barbeque place I've really been wanting to try out over in Myeongdeong," you rave, but then your fingers freeze over the GPS screen. You glance at Minghao over your shoulder, suddenly a bit sheepish. "It's a bit out of the way from your dorm and my apartment, though. Is that alright?"  
He lets out a small, soft laugh, shifting in his seat a little before reaching over to lightly flick your ear. "When has distance ever stopped me?" he retorts back, his usual dry tease in his voice. "Let's go, I'm starving."  
"Alright, alright," you huff as you plug in the address. The directions to the restaurant— somewhere twenty minutes away, barring traffic— appear on screen as you move back into your seat, still pouting slightly at your ear being flicked. "I just thought you'd be sick of me after the movie."  
"Sick of you?" He scoffs at your words as he begins to peel out of the parking lot. "I think I would die of boredom without you, actually."  
“Ah. Because no one else will keep up with you like this, hm?"  
"They're not quick enough. You're one of the rare ones who don't make me want to tear my hair out."  
"You're laying it on thick tonight. Is this a ploy to get me to pick up the dinner bill?” you tease. "Because really, Hao, there's a rather big difference between the salaries of idols and translators."  
He chuckles a little at your comment, his grip around the steering wheel tightening slightly. "No, this is not a ploy to make you pay for dinner. I'm treating tonight. I'm rich, remember?"  
"Yah, you're not treating!” you shoot back. “We’ll pay for our own shares. You should only spend your money on things that are important.”  
"And treating you isn't important? You're always important to me. Don't deny it."  
When you suddenly go silent as a flush starts to creep up your face, Minghao can't help but look away from the road for a few moments to glance at you from the corner of his eye. He can only see the side of your face, the blush that colors your cheeks glowing against your skin.  
"You can't just say stuff like that so casually," you snap, though your tone is softened out in the edges. "You should save that for birthdays or holidays."  
"And why only birthdays and holidays?" he retorts. "I'd rather tell you all the time."  
In a bid to regain a bit of an upper hand, you keep your eyes out the window as you mumble in Mandarin, "Just keep driving, xīngān."  
Seeing your flustered face flush an even deeper color of red gives Minghao a sort of satisfaction, his lips tugging up at the corners. He can't help but chuckle a little more when he hears the words that leave your mouth in Mandarin, his mind taking a few moments to register it.  
"Yah, don't just call me that without warning," he says back, voice slightly muffled as he continues to focus on the road. "My heart can only handle so much."  
You finally glance over at him. The blush still lingers, but there's a bit of a mischievous glint in your eyes now. "Should I warn you, then, if I'm about to use it?" you say sweetly, sticking to his mother tongue for the sake of seeing how far you can go with it. "Should I only save it for special occasions?"
"Yes," he manages to hiss out after a beat, a small scowl on his face when he realizes that you're taking advantage of his weakness. "I'd much prefer you to warn me in advance. And only use it on occasions that actually count."
"I'm about to use it," you warn instantly, leaning slightly forward to turn down the radio. There had been some other group's song playing, filling the car with the sweet, lilting sounds of a ballad.  
"This occasion counts, xīngān," you sing-song. "Every moment with you counts."  
At your obvious mockery, Minghao's scowl only deepens, not that he really minds. Your sweet words have his heart thudding loudly in his chest, a small huff of laughter leaving his lips in spite of it.  
"Stop being so cheesy. You're only saying this because you know that I like it, aren't you?"  
"I'm saying it because I like it," you say simply, sincerely. "It suits you. I'm about to use it again."  
You pause for a beat. "Darling," you say, this time cycling between English, Korean, and Mandarin. "Yeobo. Xīngān."  
This time, Minghao can't help but chuckle. He's definitely going to be having a good time tonight.  
"Are you going to spend the rest of the night calling me that?" he questions, finally having to pause at a red light. He turns to look at you for a few moments. "Just so I know what to expect."  
"Do you want me to?" you ask right back, your eyebrows raised slightly.  
"If you did," he starts, the words coming out before he even fully registers them, "I wouldn't stop you."  
The light turns green. The cars in front of you move forward a bit, and that means that you have to as well. The moment passes ever so slightly as Minghao is forced to lurch forward, to turn the corner that will finally have you at the barbecue place you'd recommended.  
You look ahead, away, the smile on your face widening just a bit. And because he said he wouldn't mind, because he'd given you something akin to a go-ahead—  
"Alright, xīngān," you say softly.  
The term of affection in your voice has Minghao's heartbeat rising, the nickname ringing in his ears, filling his chest with a sort of sweetness at the sound of it. It was like music to his ears, he thinks, the way you say it, the way it sounds.  
Once again, he can't help the smile that finds a place on his face, though he hides it by turning away to concentrate on the road ahead, trying to focus on it instead of the way his heart had suddenly started to race in his chest.
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The meal is comfortable. You talk about everything and nothing; you take turns cooking the meat. If sometimes you fall silent, neither of you feel the need to fill that quiet. You're so assured in each other's presence that we're fine to just be.
It's easy, with you— easy to relax in a way that he sometimes can't with others. He feels comfortable with you, safe around you, and he doesn't really have to think about what words he uses or the right thing to say.
You make it easy for him. And he's grateful for it.
As the night continues, though, the light conversation seems to eventually die down. Not that it bothers him; no, as Minghao has said before, the two of you do well with silence.
In the quiet that now surrounds the two of you, though, his mind begins to wander. A thought that has been in the back of his mind since earlier that night resurfaces again.
"Xīngān," he begins tentatively, his eyes still on the grill in front of him as if staring at it is supposed to give him some strength. Once again, he finds himself turning to Mandarin for the question, the words feeling like home on his tongue. It feels, somehow, more fitting to ask you this question in the language that's his, one that he's comfortable and practiced in. "Do you believe in fate?"
Mìngyùn. Fate. Your mouth soundlessly tries out the word, the two syllables lolling on your tongue.  
"Like—the red thread of fate," you say, just a little dumbly, as you contemplate Minghao's question. You don't even notice the way you've switched over to Mandarin to match his pace. "Like that kind of fate? Or something else?"  
He takes a beat before he answers, trying to figure out how to word his question, how to express what he means in a way that makes sense, even to himself. "I mean that kind of fate," he clarifies. "Like, soulmates."  
"Do you?" you ask suddenly, throwing the query back to him.  
"I do."  
"What version of the red string of fate do you believe in?"  
He hesitates when you ask him the question, not quite sure how to explain the kind of fate he believes in. "I believe in things that are inevitable."  
"I mean— I believe in things that are destined," he continues, trying to elaborate. "I believe the people— the ones who are supposed to be together— will always find each other, in a way, no matter what happens. No matter how much time passes, or what obstacles there are between them."  
The way the corner of your mouth twitches when he says the word inevitable sets something ablaze inside him, Minghao's heart hammering in his chest at the slight movement. 
He knows the look you're giving him is just one of interest, not a look of affection, but to him, it feels like a look of affection.  
Your lips twist into a slightly rueful smile as you take a moment to flip the meat on the grill, trying to keep it from burning. It's your turn to keep your gaze evasive as you answer. 
"I'm not sure if I believe in fate," you say, your Mandarin deliberately careful and slow. "Or soulmates. Not in the way that you do, at least."  
The words strike a painful sort of ache in his chest and Minghao finds himself having to bite down on the inside of his lip, trying to quell the way his heart seems to clench at the confession.  
This time, you slide into Korean, desperate to get your point across in the language that you know, in the tongue where you won’t be misconstrued. "I want to. I want to believe that soulmates exist—that there's someone out there for all of us," you say with a little more firmness, the change in speech giving you some more conviction.
"But I think that if soulmates do exist, they're not found; they're made." You pause to bring your gaze back up to Minghao. "People meet, they get a good feeling, and they get to work building a relationship. And that will lead to the inevitable."  
He's not quite sure why it feels like a loss, somehow, to no longer be speaking in Mandarin, and it makes his fingers itch for something to do. There's a moment where Minghao has to process the words you say, the way you express yourself so firmly and deliberately, as if you've given this some thought. Slowly, he gives a nod. "Like working in a relationship. Like making it work."  
"Like making it work," you concede.  
You gently place the last pieces of meat on Minghao's plate. "The concept of the red string of fate has always scared me," you admit, your mouth twitching upward in a slightly wistful smile. "What if the person on the other end follows the string only to realize they don't like what they find?"  
Minghao's gaze drifts down to the plate of food you've assembled for him, a gesture that feels oddly domestic, somehow, to have someone prepare a plate for him, and his heart gives a warm, affectionate little squeeze. 
He looks back up when you speak, his face a carefully stoic mask in spite of the way his heart is giving a painful thud, thud, thud inside his chest.  
"I think..." he begins slowly, his eyes still on you, the words leaving his lips careful and deliberate, as if he's trying to pick them out slowly from a tangled mess in his mind. There's an intensity to his gaze, a gravity that's hard to miss. "I think even if the person on the other end of the string doesn't like what they find, it's what they're supposed to have. It's what they're destined for."  
"Ah. Destiny."  
Minghao had stuck with Mandarin; you say it in Korean. The two words— mìngyùn, unmyeong— are the two faces of the same coin.  
"And who do you think I'm destined for, xīngān?" you ask with just the right amount of teasing, making it a point to still refer to Minghao with the Mandarin term of ‘darling’ despite speaking the rest of the question in Korean.  
It's supposed to be nothing more than a good-natured joke, but Minghao feels the sudden urge to be honest.
He knows it's a joke, he knows it's meant to be a lighthearted question, but something in the back of his head, something sharp and cruel, his traitorous, selfish heart keeps repeating the question back to him: Who do you think I'm destined for? 
The thought that you'd be destined for anyone but him makes him feel like there's something lodged in his throat, something painful and sharp, and he wants to reach out and grab you, hold you, pull you tight against him and just never let go.
But instead he just looks at you and he forces the corners of his lips to tug up into a smile. "You're destined for someone wonderful," he says in his soft Mandarin, his trademark sincerity.
It's a non-answer; a cop-out, a way to avoid confessing things he shouldn't, but it's the best he can manage at this moment, when I wish it was me is screaming so loud in his head, it's all he can hear.
You smile softly.
Minghao had told the truth. You are destined for someone wonderful. 
He just wishes he could have been more specific. 
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The next time he sees you is ahead of the boys’ Japanese showcase. Minghao had been lagging behind in the airport; he'd managed to get a few moments of shut eye on the plane, but it did little to stave off the exhaustion he still felt.
He walks a few steps behind Seungcheol, his eyes flitting idly through the crowd, until they land on you, walking slightly ahead.
You were already moving efficiently, keeping your gaze straight as you walked next to Seungcheol, your eyes focused and unflinching even as the press and fans yelled out at you.
Minghao's eyes don't leave your figure, following you and Seungcheol as you navigate the throngs of airport patrons with practiced ease. He's almost unsettled by how effortless you seemed— walking through the crowd as if it were nothing more than a casual stroll through the park, your expression set and unwavering as you translate for Seungcheol in a low, firm tone.
Once you finally get past the front doors of the airport, there's a lull as the boys all pile into a twelve-seater van. You stay by the door, finally stealing seconds to see each of them as they pass by you.  
Vernon dips his head in a nod. Mingyu throws you an exaggerated wink. Jun mouths 'hello' to you in Japanese. 
And then it's Minghao's turn to get in the van, to pass by you. There's not much either of you can do or say yet, considering the fact that there are still fans and press scrutinizing your every move, but he still has this. A moment of acknowledgment, however he deems fit.  
Minghao's mouth tugs up at one corner as he sees you smile at him, the sight immediately making something warm bloom in his chest.  
He can't help the subtle, almost instinctual reaction as he stops ever so slightly in passing you. He wants to say something, but words elude him.  
Instead, his hand just grazes against your wrist— the merest press of his fingers against the bare skin of your arm. It's a tiny gesture, but one that speaks volumes.
For the rest of the car ride to the hotel, Minghao struggles.
He's stuck in a car full of members, all exhausted from the flight, all loud and noisy and rowdy, and the van feels suddenly stifling. He spends most of the time looking out the window, trying to focus on whatever he sees.
Anything to distract himself from thoughts of you and the ghost of your soft, warm skin under his fingers.
The next time you're slated to see the group is in the dressing room before their showcase. It's hours later. Hours you spend translating, liaising, transcribing. The dressing room is as lively as ever, most of the members having already changed into their stage outfits. Several of them are sitting around, idly eating snacks or watching videos.  
You carefully push open the door. "Hey," you greet, and you're met with the instant chorus of thirteen boys welcoming you.  
Seungkwan excitedly calls out, "Hey, hey, hey!"  
Joshua gives you a warm smile. Chan waves exaggeratedly.  
You let out a huff of laughter, already acutely familiar with the boys' habits. "Just wanted to check in on everyone before the showcase," you say as you lean against the doorframe.
Minghao is sitting on a couch in the corner of the room, his eyes on you as you say your reason for coming to see them. 
"We're all good here," Jeonghan answers, one hand propping his chin up. "You look like you could use a sit, though."
Your laugh is just a little strained, your smile a touch forced. But your façade stays intact, even as you shake your head. "I've still got some preparations to do," you say lightly, and then you shift gears before anyone can press. "How was the flight?"
"It was fine," Seokmin pipes up. "You know, nothing out of the usual. We were well-behaved."
"Well-behaved," Wonwoo echoes from the couch. "If by well-behaved, you mean Soonyoung and Vernon got extremely handsy in the plane."
"Hey," Vernon protests, whipping his head around to look at Wonwoo, "don't say it like that!"
On the couch, Jihoon lets out an amused snort, shaking his head in fond, exasperated disbelief. "No, no, please," he encourages, his voice laced with sarcasm, "tell everyone how you two almost got us yelled at by the stewards because you were roughhousing over some food."
Soonyoung pouts, his expression instantly adopting a look of exaggerated innocence. "I don't know what you're talking about," he insists. "I was a perfect angel."
While the other boys are all busy ribbing on Vernon and Soonyoung, Minghao makes his way over to where you're standing against the doorframe.
He stops when he's standing next to you, and the corner of his mouth tugs up into an amused smile as he takes in your distant, almost out of it expression. When he speaks, his voice is soft enough for you to hear but low enough that the others can't, barely more than a whisper. 
"You look tired."
You give him a sheepish smile as you pat out invisible wrinkles on your linen blazer. "Hao," you greet quietly, still a bit hesitant to use xīngān in front of his members. Your gaze flickers briefly to the rest of the room before you switch to Mandarin, a clear indication that you want your next words to be for Minghao and Minghao alone.  
"I am tired," you admit in his native tongue. "But it's nothing crazy. Just the usual exhaustion."  
"You always work too hard," he responds, matching your switch to Mandarin. His gaze sweeps over your form, taking in the weary lines of your frame, the subtle stiffness in your stance. "You look like you'll fall over any second."  
You roll your shoulders a bit, unconsciously leaning closer toward him. "It's my back, still," you confess. "Making things a little harder than usual. I really will get it checked when we're back in Korea."  
A concerned frown tugs at the corners of Minghao's mouth when he hears you say it's your back, his eyes sweeping over your frame once again. "How long has it been bothering you?" he asks, his gaze sweeping over you.  
He tries not to seem too obvious about it, but he steps a little bit closer, shifting a fraction of an inch closer in case you do fall over. His arm brushes up against yours, the contact between the two of you almost imperceptible.  
"This morning," you say with a rueful smile, your hand reaching behind to massage the small of your back from over your layers of clothing. "The plane was a bit cramped."  
Minghao's eyes narrow a fraction of an inch when he hears the reason, one of his eyebrows lifting slightly in a mixture of surprise and annoyance. "I told you to get it checked before the flight," he says.  
You give Minghao a look that's mildly exasperated and wholly exhausted. "I'm already booked to see a physician once this trip is over," you grumble, crossing your arms over your chest as you look up at Minghao.  
"You always say that," Minghao responds, the hint of annoyance in his voice a clear indication of just how frustrated he is. "It's clearly bothering you every day. If you just took some time off, maybe even just a week, maybe you'd—"  
"Minghao."
The quiet, stern way you say his name— just his name; not Hao, not xīngān— cuts right through his frustrated tirade. A flicker of surprise passes across Minghao's features when he hears the way you say his name, the almost snap in your tone shutting him up.
"I'm going to go," you inform him stiffly, slipping back into Korean and away from the language you reserved for each other. "We need to prepare for the showcase."
His jaw clenches, a muscle in his cheek twitching as he tries to keep his mouth shut for once, biting back the words he wants to say, the protests that are so close to leaving his lips.He lets out another huff of air, forcing his expression to stay neutral. 
"Yeah," he replies in the same language, the one word filled with annoyance. "See you."
When the showcase rolls around, you maintain a backstage presence. Your role, as always, entails that you pay complete attention to the boys as they speak. Whenever they address the crowd as a whole, you translate their Korean into Japanese.
For some reason, hearing the familiar sound of your voice coming out of the speakers, the smoothness of your Japanese, still feels somewhat calming to Minghao. In the chaos of lights and loud music, hearing the rhythm of your words through the speakers makes it feel like, at least for the moment, you're still right there beside him.
When the songs pass and the showcase ends, the members are all still riding the high of the excitement of their performance, the energy of their fans still buzzing in the atmosphere.
They all make their way backstage, the hum of their conversations filling the air, a sense of excitement and satisfaction, each and every one of them energized. Minghao, once again, makes his way over to where you're standing, his eyes on you, his expression almost intense.
You don't immediately notice Minghao approaching because a staff member is talking to you in rapid Japanese about some interviews you need to coordinate, need to play the role of interpreter for. You're trying to bargain for a moment's break, but it's a losing battle.
The staff then suddenly folds into a bow, and only then do you realize that Minghao had come up to you. You dip your head in an equally respectful bow of acknowledgement.
In Japanese, you tiredly assure the staff member you'll be there for the press circus; she leaves Minghao and you alone at your reassurance. You flash Minghao a weary smile, slipping, this time, into Korean. "Good job with the showcase," you say benevolently. "You did well."
He can't help the subtle frown that forms on his face, the way his eyebrows furrow in concern. The fact that you're once again hiding behind that professional exterior of yours, the friendly, polite smile you're shooting him, does nothing to soothe his frustration.
"Thanks," he mutters, his tone somewhat clipped.
He hesitates for a moment, his gaze sweeping over you. "Hey," he eventually says. "Come with me for a second."
You cast a glance around backstage. The boys are all off doing their own things— chugging water, ribbing each other, taking photos. In a gaggle of thirteen, it's easy to fly under the radar at any given time.
"You have a magazine interview in fifteen minutes," you tell Minghao, clueing him in on the conversation you had with staff just moments prior. "We can't really go anywhere—"
"I know," Minghao responds, his tone perhaps a little sharper than he'd meant it to be, frustration getting the better of him.
He takes a quick glance around the backstage area, confirming that the others are all occupied enough that they won't notice, before his gaze lands back on you. "We won't be long," he assures you, already grabbing your wrist.
His grasp on your wrist is firm, his hand strong and his fingers wrapping around the limb easily, pulling you along with him, with no room for any protest. He doesn't break his pace until he's found a small, secluded bathroom, pulling you inside and shutting the door behind the two of you before anyone could notice.
"Minghao," you hiss under your breath, still obviously pissed in the way you forgo both his nickname and pet name. "You can't just drag me off when we have work."  
Even in his already frustrated state, Minghao finds himself momentarily distracted by your pissed off tone, and the use of his name without a nickname or pet name. He likes you calling him by some form of a cute or affectionate moniker far more than just plain, unadorned Minghao.  
"We still have a couple more minutes," he retorts, mirroring your tone even as his hand slides down to lace your fingers together.  
His eyes are heavy on you, his expression intense even as he takes an unabashed, close-up look at your face, studying the weariness in your expression, and the strain that's clearly weighing down on you.  
He makes a move to reach down, his gaze on your cheek, to brush away a strand of stray, loose hair. His heart lurches when he sees the way your expression softens subtly, even when you're still trying to be pissed at him. The way you immediately intertwine your fingers in his— God.  
"We look very suspicious right now," you say dryly, your free hand gesturing vaguely to the fact that Minghao practically has you pinned against the bathroom wall. "Is this what you pulled me away for?"  
"We'll make it quick," he manages to reply, sounding slightly hoarse, before closing the already-minimal distance between the two of you, one arm snaking around your waist.  
"We shouldn't—" you protest weakly, because there's just some things you can't explain away. Like how Minghao and you might be caught hugging in this bathroom when you were colleagues at worst, good friends at best. "We're going to get in trouble."  
"We won't," he responds, his tone firm, stubborn.  
His other hand comes up to rest at the back of your head, pulling you in even closer, burying your face in his chest, the other arm still looped firmly around your waist. He lets out a sharp exhale of air, the frustration and tension of the moment melting into something akin to relief. 
"Just—" he mumbles, his breath hot in your ear. "Let me hold you. Just a little— for a second."  
A small flicker of relief fills his chest when he feels the tension ease as a result of his embrace, the way you lean against him, almost as if you're allowing yourself just to relax. To melt against his body the way you almost never did in public.  
When you mumble Mandarin against his chest, your words are slightly muffled. "I'm sorry about earlier," you whisper. "I was really stressed."  
"I know," he responds, just as quietly. "I'm sorry too."  
This was how it was with the two of you— the quick-tempered arguments, the stubborn disagreements, and then the inevitable apologies that always followed. Minghao knew he was stubborn, maybe even a little irritable, and he would admit that he could've handled his response better.
But, for some reason— in the moment, at least— all of that tension that had been between the two of you in that moment just evaporated in the embrace. "You're working yourself to the bone," he mutters quietly, into your collarbone.
He knows how hard you work, in general, but it's become increasingly worse as of late, it seems. The endless translation, the interviews, the subtitles and scripts. It all seemed to be getting too much, even for you.
"I know it's not my place to tell you this but—" he continues, his voice becoming even more hoarse and heavy in worry. "You need to take better care of yourself. You can't just keep pushing yourself like this. Not like you've been doing. You're going to burn out at this rate."
It's just the way the two of you were— you, the overworked, over-stressed, and over-tired, and him, almost constantly worried about your general well-being, worried about you working yourself to actual exhaustion.
The moment you gently run your fingers through his hair, he instantly melts against you even more, practically nuzzling against your shoulder.
"You do have some right to tell me this. We're friends," you sigh, tilting your head to press your lips to the side of Minghao's temples. "And you're right— I'll look into taking a medical leave for a bit, once we get back home."  
"Good," he responds, his voice quiet but firm. "You need a break. And I—" he pauses, hesitating.  
He doesn't like seeing you like that, he wants to say. He doesn't like seeing you so tired and so stressed every day. He doesn't like how you barely have any time together anymore. He doesn't like seeing you overexert yourself so much.  
He stops himself from saying it out loud, instead letting out a soft huff before continuing. "I really worry about you, you know?" he mutters against your shoulder.  
"I know, xīngān," you respond, slipping into Mandarin in a bid to comfort Minghao a little more. A beat. And then, ever so quietly: "I worry about you, too."  
You slide your hand up and down his back. "We're both fools," you whisper with a slight huff of laughter.  
"Yeah," he agrees with an exhale of a laugh at your last words. "We are both fools."  
But we're fools for each other, his mind unhelpfully reminds him as he dares to hold you for just a moment more.
He just has to go and mess it all up by insisting, "I wish you’d let people take care of you."
People, meaning him. He had meant to say I wish you’d let me take care of you, but instead something entirely else came out. He knows he ought to back down the moment he feels you tense under his grasp, but Minghao was nothing if not stubborn.
"I don’t need to be taken care of," you persist. 
Minghao huffs into your hair. "That’s bullshit and you know it."
"Hao—"
"It’s not a sign of weakness—"
"You keep treating me like—"
"I’m not—"
"Minghao!"
You’ve all but pulled away now, your earlier softness replaced with a new kind of tension. It’s not the same tiredness from being overworked; no, it’s the frustration of the two of you trying to speak over each other. The push and pull of your words. Your mutual inability to communicate just what you mean. 
Minghao’s fingers ball into fists at his sides to hide his almost trembling hands. It’s all he can do to keep himself from reaching back out for you.     
"I'll go ahead," you whisper decisively, your gaze fixed on the door. "I'll see you at the magazine interview."
An almost visceral, physical pain shoots through Minghao's chest at the mention of you leaving. His mind screams no, don't leave, don't go. But he swallows down his own irrational, impulsive desires, his own selfish longing for you.
"I— yeah," Minghao responds slowly. "I'll meet you there."
He watches silently, almost helplessly, as you make a beeline for the door.
The interview is with NYLON JAPAN. You interpret and translate for both the interviewer and the boys, once again acting as an off-camera presence— an intent, constant figure quietly relaying questions and answers.  
There's some benefit in SEVENTEEN being thirteen members strong. That way, Minghao is in the second row, some distance away from you. If you avoid his gaze, it almost feels negligible.
For the duration of the interview, Minghao can hardly concentrate on the questions and answers being traded between the members and the interviewer. His focus is firmly drawn towards you.  
He can't help but glance in your direction every so often. Every time your gaze accidentally meets his, it's like a jolt of electricity straight to his chest, his stomach clenching at the painful realization of how close you are, and how far away you feel.
When the interviewer begins to ask member-specific questions, you do your job as well as you always do. The first two are for Seungcheol, then Chan. And then, of course, there it is.
You nod a bit as the interviewer poses his question. "Jun and Minghao," you translate, your voice wavering imperceptibly on the second name. "You two are the members that have given up a life in your home country in exchange for being an idol. How are you able to cope with that?"
As you translate, Jun’s answer to the interviewer, Minghao can hardly focus on the actual words he's saying. He’s only half-listening as he watches the subtle flutter of your eyelashes, the slight parting of your lips, the crinkle in your forehead as you concentrate hard on getting the Japanese translation perfect.
His chest feels tight, like there's a band wrapped around his entire body, constricting his airflow.
When your gaze finally moves back to him, locking eyes with his own, a rush of breath leaves his lungs, his heart jumping in his throat. The look in your eyes, the distance between the two of you— it’s nothing short of exaggerated.
For a brief moment, he's not answering a question for a Japanese magazine interview. He's answering a question for you. 
"It's hard," Minghao answers, his voice quiet and low, somewhat hoarse. "It’s really hard and lonely sometimes."
Every word that leaves his lips feels like a struggle to get out, like they're getting stuck in his throat, choking him.
"But I have the members, and we have the fans," he continues, a quiet yearning in his eyes. "And so it’s bearable," he says, despite the pit still present in his stomach, despite the ache of needing more.
He keeps his gaze focused on you, letting every word he says hold a meaning beyond the answer to the interviewer’s question— as if he’s answering for you and not the interviewer. But he has to keep his words vague, just in case those damned cameras picked up on his words and the way he looks at you.
"It's bearable," he repeats, swallowing hard, letting his eyes convey what he really means, even if his words can’t. You make it bearable.
There are some things that don't need to be translated. The pinched look on Minghao's face. The way he's openly staring at you. The subtle shift among the members— all of whom seem to pick up on something Minghao isn’t saying.
"Is that all?" you ask Minghao in Korean, your voice steady as ever despite the flicker of emotion in your gaze.
That aching, yearning expression is still present on his face as he responds. 
"Yeah," he says. "That’s all."
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Minghao's phone is tucked under his pillow, the device set to vibrate.
He jolts awake the moment it begins to buzz, a habit he had grown after years of being under the spotlight and on the road, his hand flying out to grab the phone.
His eyes bleary, he blinks a few times to clear his vision, a slight smile involuntarily tugging at his lip when he sees your message, his eyes skimming over the contents of it several times.
i'm sorry about today. (yesterday, technically?) i hope you're resting right now. ily.
"Idiot," he murmurs quietly to himself.
You don't have anything to apologize for, he replies quickly. It's not your fault. I'm the one who should be sorry. I should've been more patient with you.
How are you? Are you okay?
i'm ok. fell asleep on the couch and woke up suddenly. but did i wake you? it's so late. you should be asleep.
A quiet sigh leaves Minghao's lips as he reads your response, a part of him feeling a pang of guilt, as if knowing he was the reason you were awake right now.
You did wake me. But don't worry. I'm glad you texted me. Can you call me?
A beat. 
let me just step out onto my balcony so i don't wake my roommates.
The image of you carefully sneaking out onto the balcony to talk, just so you wouldn't wake your roommates, briefly flashes through Minghao's mind, and it reminds him of his own sleeping roommates a mere few feet away from him.
He sighs softly, quietly pulling himself out of bed, careful to not disturb Mingyu and Jun as he quietly makes his way out into the balcony from the door to his left.
The air is cold and the night sky is clear. Those are the two of the three things Minghao registers when he steps out on the balcony of his hotel room. The third thing comes after you go to call him and there’s a slightly amused edge to your tone as you say, "Look to your right, xīngān."
He turns to look to his right just as you asked, his eyes searching the balcony area in the distance. He can't quite make out any details on your figure in the low lighting, but when his eyes finally land on you, his heart skips a beat all the same.
"Found you," he murmurs.
"I didn’t mean to wake you," you say softly. "We could have talked in the morning, you know."
"I know," Minghao responds quietly, leaning against the railing of his own balcony, the metal cold to the touch, his eyes fixed on you. He's sure you can't see him, but it doesn’t matter at this moment.  
He was looking at you, and that was enough.
"I wanted to talk to you," he says simply, the words said without a trace of shame, just quiet honesty.
"What did you want to talk about?" you ask, giving him the liberty to set the pace for tonight, to pick and choose his battles.
There are a lot of things Minghao could say right now, a lot of things he wants to say. But instead, he settles for, "How are you?"
"Better now," you say simply, your gaze still fixed on Minghao in the distance. And it's the truth, even if the second half of your answer goes unspoken. Better now, that you're talking to him.
He stands there silently, still watching you from a distance. Despite his earlier confidence in talking to you, he's suddenly feeling uncharacteristically timid, tongue-tied almost, with his words caught in his throat. He can’t bring himself to speak for a moment, a part of him still feeling guilty about earlier.
He swallows the tightness in his throat, taking a deep breath, before finally forcing the words out. "I'm sorry," he mumbles. "For what happened in the bathroom."
Perhaps it's the years you’ve known each other, the herculean task you’ve both faced. But Minghao and you both know better than anyone that things were so easily lost in translation, that there’s only so many emotions that can be grasped in all the languages of the world.
"We just have to get better at using our words, I guess," you sigh. 
Something in his chest settles at your response— at the understanding in it, at the fact that you don't hate him. The knowledge washes over him like a sudden warmth, the guilt he'd felt earlier slowly evaporating with each passing moment.
"We do," he replies quietly.
There's a comfort, still, in being just a couple of balconies away. How you can make out each other's vague silhouettes in the late evening of this foreign country. It feels like you're standing on the precipice of something, of possibility.  
But instead of confronting it, you opt to dance the line a little longer. Your eyes are still trained on the sky as you slip into Mandarin.  
"The stars out here are so clear, xīngān," you muse thoughtfully. "It's beautiful, don't you think?"
The change in language registers quietly in Minghao's mind, his brain taking a second to get used to it after speaking in Korean and stilted Japanese most of the day.  
He looks up at the night sky for a moment in quiet contemplation, taking in the beauty of the stars as you'd described them, before turning his gaze back to the shadowed outline of your figure in the distance.  
Something about the sight, about you, makes his heart ache a little bit. Beautiful, you had said about the stars, but he’s not looking at them. 
He responds softly, longingly, in Mandarin, his voice almost a whisper in the night air. "It really is."
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The next day, you both get on separate flights back to Seoul. As Minghao had poked and prodded you to do, you finally take the medical leave from work— a one-week block, which was the longest you’d ever gone away from PLEDIS since you first started nine years ago.
Roughly three days into your break, Minghao is in dance practice when he feels his phone buzzing in his pocket. He frowns when he glances at the screen and sees your name. 
can i call? 
The sight of the message, so unlike your usual lighthearted air, makes his heart drop instantly in his chest. There's no text-speak, no cutesy words, no emoji— just a simple question. He drops whatever he's doing, ignoring the questioning stares from the members as he steps out into the hallway and quickly dials your number without a second thought.
"Xīngān," he greets you, a little breathless from the rush he'd felt upon seeing your message. There's a hint of concern in his voice as his heart races in his chest, his mind whirling with thoughts. 
He doesn't even bother with pleasantries or small talk, diving straight into the issue at hand. "Is everything alright? What's wrong?"
Much to Minghao's chagrin, you bother with pleasantries. "Hey," you say back in Mandarin when he greets you. For a moment, you hesitate; like you're not quite sure which language you want to speak to Minghao in.  
"I'm sorry," you say quietly in Korean. "Did I bother you?"  
Minghao shakes his head, even as you can't see him. He's silent for a moment, mulling over his words before replying, "No. Never. You didn't bother me, xīngān."  
The words are uttered quietly, his voice soft and gentle, as if he's afraid that the volume of his own voice might somehow scare you away.  
"I finally visited a doctor for my back," you say, finally. "It's a herniated disc, and I'm being slotted in for a surgery in two days."  
His heart drops into his chest at your admission, the words feeling like a sudden weight upon him. Herniated disc.  
The words feel like a sudden strike to his heart, his mind racing with questions and concerns. "A herniated... disc," he repeats, his voice a little breathless, a little shocked, as he quickly tries to process what he'd just heard.  
He doesn't realize he's switched to Mandarin, his own words spoken in a rush. "How bad is it? What are the doctors saying?"  
You stubbornly stick to Korean, likely because it's easier to accurately relay your medical results in the same language you'd received them in. "It's not bad," you say firmly. "The operation is an open discectomy on my lower back. It will take at most an hour, and I'll only need to stay in the hospital for up to three days."  
There's a flicker of irritation in Minghao's eyes at your stubborn insistence to continue speaking in your language, frustrated at the lack of comprehension and understanding it brought. He wants to protest, to argue, to tell you to just use Mandarin— but it disappears when he hears your firm voice, when he realizes what it is you're telling him.  
An hour-long operation. Three days in the hospital. It didn't sound bad, per se, and logically, he knew that you would probably be fine. It still didn't make him worry any less.  
"What are the risks?" Minghao asks after a moment, his voice quiet and tentative.  
Normally, he would have just looked up whatever answers he wanted, searching it up in medical databases and online articles. But, for some reason, he's suddenly terrified to hear anything other than the sound of your voice— your words, reassuring him that everything will be okay.  
"No change to the back pains," you rattle off. "A five to fifteen percent chance of a revision discectomy if the herniated disc returns. A lower chance of an unstable spine. It's— they're truly not bad risks, Hao."  
"Five to fifteen perc— no, that's not a 'truly not bad risk'," Minghao counters immediately, his voice sharp and frustrated, as if scolding a child that was being too nonchalant.  
"You— it's surgery, xīngān—" he continues in Mandarin, his tone almost pleading. "Five to fifteen percent chance— it— what if something goes wrong?"  
He feels a little bit frustrated at his sudden loss for words in both languages, as if his own limited vocabulary couldn’t express the rush of emotions that had suddenly overwhelmed him.  
"Hey," you say softly into the receiver, this time switching over to Mandarin. Because it had always been more soothing to him, more familiar in the sense that mattered. "Take a moment and breathe for me, xīngān."
There's a sense of calm that washes over him as he finally hears the change in language, the comforting, familiar words he'd spent his entire life surrounded by.
He takes a deep, shuddering inhale, followed by a slow exhale, his eyes squeezed shut as he mentally counts the seconds like he had done before. Slowly, the panic, the fear he'd felt gradually starts to subside, leaving his heart and breath steadier— but not completely unbothered.
After a moment, you go on in Mandarin, calm and measured. "It's a surgery with a high success rate of sixty to ninety percent," you maintain. "I need it to address the persistent back pains, xīngān. If I don't do it now, the pain will only get worse and more of my spine could be affected."  
You pause, letting the words sink in. "These doctors are good," you go on. "They do their job well."  
Minghao takes several more slow, steady breaths as he listens, the sound of your voice alone calming him down, helping him keep his mind clear and focused. He knows you're speaking to him in Mandarin because it's easier to communicate with him this way, but he can't help but notice the subtle firmness, the reassurance in your tone.  
The statistics, the numbers, the facts— they're hard to deny, and as he takes another shaky inhale and exhale, he realizes that you're right. "Sixty to ninety percent success rate," he repeats to himself, his voice a soft murmur.  
"Sixty to ninety percent," you reaffirm. "I'm sorry for springing this on you," you say, suddenly a little meek. "I— I just didn't know who else to call."  
He notices it then, the meekness in your words, the small hint of vulnerability in your voice, and any remaining anxiety he felt from the situation suddenly dissolves with the realization that you needed this.  
You had called him because you’d needed to hear a familiar, comforting voice, a sense of reassurance after what you'd just confessed. He swallows back his fears, his worries, any thoughts about the risk and that lingering, unpleasant feeling in his chest, because you needed him to be calm, to be steadfast.  
"Don't... Don't apologize, xīngān," he says almost immediately after. He swallows again before continuing, mentally berating himself for letting his anxiety and irrational fears take over his brain. "No, don't— I'm glad you called. I'll always pick up the phone."  
"Are you free tomorrow?" you ask tentatively. "We could grab a meal before I have to check into the hospital."  
As he hears the question, his mind immediately begins to run through his schedule for the next day.  
He knows what he should do. He knows what the logical part of his brain, the part that's in control of his rationality, is supposed to do. But when he thinks of you— of you, in the hospital, waiting to undergo a surgery (it's safe, it's a safe surgery) alone, without him—  
"I'll clear my schedule," he tells you quietly.  
"No, you don't have to," you say quickly, falling back on Korean in an attempt to express your haste. "It's okay. We can just meet once the operation is over—"  
"I'm clearing my schedule,” he repeats, his voice firm, final. “I’m going to be there. We’re eating before the surgery, and I’m going to be at the hospital with you afterwards. I’m not letting you go to the hospital alone."  
A beat. While there are things that Minghao and you have yet to clear about the nature of our friendship, one thing stands true regardless of label.
"You're too good to me, Xu Minghao," you say softly, shifting to his mother tongue for the sake of sentiment. 
He lets the sound of your voice, the familiar language, wash over him. As it does, it soothes the anxiety that still gnaws at the corners of his mind. "It’s…” he begins quietly, a small, almost sheepish smile forming on his lips, “not really…”
There’s a moment of silence before he sighs softly, his expression growing more earnest as he continues. “Being good to you is the easy part.”
"And it’s xīngān, not Xu Minghao," he adds quickly, and he’s sure you can hear the pout in his voice. 
It draws a laugh out of you— one that's still quiet, but a lot more genuine. A moment of levity. A brightness that only Minghao could truly give you. The sound of your laughter, even over the phone, is enough to lift his spirits, his heart swelling in his chest in relief.
"Xīngān," you amend, and your voice is just a little too fond to be friendly. 
For a moment, Minghao can convince himself that all will be alright in the world again. 
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The discectomy is relatively uneventful, which can only mean that it was good. There's no way of Minghao knowing this, of course, not as he spends the entire morning in a group meeting he can't really skip.
Regardless, all the members can tell that Minghao's heart isn't really in it. That he's physically at the PLEDIS building, sure, but his mind is on you— somewhere in an operating room, under anesthesia.
Seungcheol broaches the topic carefully. "Ah, it’s their surgery today, isn’t it?" the leader asks almost too casually, to no one in particular. There's a murmur of agreement across the table of thirteen boys. Some shifty, knowing glances at Minghao.
Minghao nods in response to Seungcheol's question, his expression still entirely too… anxious. "Yeah," he replies, keeping his voice as controlled as he possibly can, even as he feels his dread build up inside of him. "I'll be going to see them, after this."
It doesn't go amiss to anyone that Minghao doesn't even bother to extend the invite to anyone else. Jun is the only one who looks vaguely miffed about it, but they're all mostly understanding of how different Minghao felt with you compared to their own concern, their own affection.
Joshua offers the next best thing. 
"I was thinking we could chip in to send flowers," he says, and there's easy assent across the group. Minghao feels a small flicker of warmth in his chest at the thought of how you'd receive these messages of their care and concern.
As Vernon and Jeonghan debate what arrangement to send, Jun throws a glance at Minghao and almost smiles. Almost.
"What flowers did you get them?" Jun says in Mandarin, so no one else in the room can pick up how quickly the other Chinese man had clocked that Minghao was already three steps ahead.
Minghao glances over to his friend, his expression unreadable, as he answers in the same language. "Sunflowers," he replies, not missing a beat.
Jun can only smile faintly at Minghao's answers. "Sunflowers for your sunshine," Jun teases good-naturedly, still in the tongue that none of the other members will understand.
There's something about the way the Mandarin term for 'sunshine'— yángguāng— that sounds just so right. The Chinese term falls from the older man's lips like a blessing, a wish for good luck and health and goodness for all those involved. 
Minghao isn't sure if he'd imagined it, not exactly, but he sees the way Jun looks at him right after he says the word. For a split second, Minghao's chest tightens, his throat clenching up, because maybe Jun thinks his feelings for you are obvious.
Maybe Jun thinks he's been obvious. In his head, he'd already been thinking it— yángguāng, sunshine, mine— And it's only now that he realizes that he was never the only one who saw it that way. That saw you and Minghao as something inevitable. 
He glances at Jun, eyes softening, filled with almost a wave of gratitude.
"Sunflowers for my sunshine," he repeats, hoping it will somehow manifest like a prophecy. 
You wake up after your operation with one less disc in your spine and one too many floral arrangements in your hospital room. As you blink against the vestiges of your anesthesia, you register the absurd, almost comical amount of flowers piled on the couch, and it doesn't take you more than a couple of seconds to realize it came from the boys.  
One of whom is dozing off in a chair next to you. You watch with mild amusement as Minghao's head dips in his restless slumber, his fingers still surprisingly firm around the bouquet of sunflowers in his lap. The affection you feel for him then threatens to overwhelm you.  
You manage to tamp it down in favor of gently prompting, "Minghao."  
Your voice is still hoarse, still a little rough around the edges. Not quite enough to rouse him from his sleep. After two or so more attempts, you go for what you know will wake him up.  
"Xīngān," you call out with no shortage of fondness.  
The sound of your voice jolts Minghao awake, and he opens his eyes in an instant. For a moment, his vision is still blurry, the world around him seeming almost vague, fuzzy with sleep, but then it snaps into focus when he sees you.
When he sees you awake, alive, and looking at him. His heart does somersaults in his chest.
"Yángguāng," he answers, his voice low, soft and affectionate, barely above a whisper.
"That's a new one," you say in Mandarin; your voice is still scratchy, but your amusement is not any less evident.    
God, he'd never get tired of watching that. Of watching your lips move that way. "You like it?" Minghao asks.  
He doesn't need an answer to his question, because he already knows that you do— but he can't help himself, needing the confirmation, needing to hear your answer. The thought of calling you sunshine isn't a new one, but saying it out loud to you for the first time, when you're awake? It feels like a miracle.  
"I could live with it," you answer with a soft smile— even though both Minghao and you knew that you would now never be able to live without it.  
Minghao wants to laugh at the way you shrug his question off, at the way you seem so nonchalant, even as you give him that sweet, sweet smile that is so bright that it could rival the very sun itself.  
Because he knows the truth. He knows you're happy about it. He knows you love it. He can tell it in the way you're looking at him, in the way your eyes glitter with affection.  
"I'm glad," he answers, playing right into your charade because he knows every little trick in your book.  
And then, in a fit of bravery— one that he almost feels like applauding himself for— he leans in to press a kiss to your temple.  
When he pulls away, the bouquet of sunflowers still clutched in his hands, he's sure he can see it. The happiness in your eyes. The sheer, blinding affection in your smile.  
"Thank you," you whisper earnestly. Partly because your voice is still shot; partly because you don't trust yourself to speak any louder. "For coming to see me."  
He has to swallow hard to regain control of his emotions, because he is so terribly, terribly in love. He laughs under his breath because he's not sure what to do about his feelings anymore; maybe it's best to just throw himself off the cliff and see what happens, right?  
"I'll always come see you," he answers, instead, making a promise for the future.  
He leans in again with that thought on his mind, and he presses another kiss to your temple, softer, longer, his lips lingering against your skin for just a fraction of a second longer than necessary.  
He pulls away to meet your gaze, and he almost feels like laughing at the way he can see his feelings reflecting in your eyes, shining in the pools of your irises. He loves you, he loves you, he loves you. How is he going to live with that?  
Minghao leans in again, but this time, he kisses the corner of your lips, right where your smile is.  
And it's astounding, really, just how terrible Minghao and you still are at this whole thing. Despite all the years between you, you still falter and stumble in getting your feelings across.  
There was always something. A job to do. A reputation to uphold. And now, a hospital bed, a recovery period.  
But, for once, you can only laugh breathlessly as Minghao gives you two more kisses, as you feel the upward curve of his lips against your face. Your heart stutters at the peck on the corner of your mouth; it's not quite what you both want, what you both need, but you'll take it. God, you'd take it.  
"Stop that," you try to chide in between your giggles. "Get off me, Hao—"
The sound of you laughing is like a revelation in Minghao's chest; as if a chord of tension that had been strung taut within him for so long had been cut.
He pulls back with a look of satisfaction on his face, that teasing grin playing on his lips as he does. "But why?" he asks in an absolutely, unbearably sweet tone, a tone that is laced with faux innocence, even though he knows why. You were recovering. You had to be careful.
A part of him is almost glad he hadn't kissed you properly. Because if he so much as feels the softness of your lips against his, he's not sure he'll be able to stop.
But God, does that make him want it even more— the fact that he can't, the fact that you're so close and yet so painfully out of reach. He forces himself to look elsewhere then, and his gaze falls to the bouquet on his lap, to the flowers he'd brought you.
Sunflowers, because he doesn't think they make flowers that even compare to the brightness of your smile, or the way your eyes glitter when you laugh— at least, not flowers that make him think of you and you alone.
He stands, then, holding the bouquet out to you. "Do you like them?" he can't help but laugh. He had chosen them and bought them for you, and yet, in true Minghao fashion, he finds himself still asking for your approval.
"I love them," you say easily, readily, already reaching out to take the arrangement from Minghao. 
Three sunflowers in full bloom, flanked by chamomile and irises and baby's-gypsophila. Your smile is bright and wide as you look down at it, as you hold it delicately.  When you look back up at Minghao, there's that touch of amusement again. That tinge of disbelief that seems to wordlessly communicate, I can't believe you.  
"You didn't have to," you point out with a low chuckle, shifting slightly in your hospital bed as your fingers go imperceptibly tighter around his flowers. "But thank you."  
The warmth that spreads through Minghao's chest at the sight of the smile on your face is enough to almost make him want to kiss you all over again.  
It's not the first time he'd given you an arrangement of flowers, but it's the first time it's made Minghao feel like he's just given you his heart, too.  
"No, I didn't," he agrees lightly, reaching out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear, the very tips of his fingers brushing against your soft skin. But I wanted to.
The boys all come to visit, one after the other. In small groups, in age order, until they have to be kicked out for being too noisy and potentially drawing too much attention to themselves. There are doctors, too, and nurses. All of whom are a little shell shocked at the idols just milling about in your hospital room, making themselves at home.  
Throughout it all, Minghao stays. His usual quiet, steadfast presence. He absorbs all the diagnoses; he tells off his members when they get overwhelming. And, when no one's looking, he'll squeeze your hand or press his fingers into your shoulder.  
As always, there are some things neither of you have to say out loud.  
He's more than happy to play the role of your protector, even as he continues to worry, even as he's filled with dread over the possibility of you not recovering fully and what that might mean.  
See, Minghao would never describe himself as a man of prayer. He doesn't go to temples nearly as often as he should, though he does go often, and he doesn't consider himself not spiritual.  
He finds himself praying anyway. To the universe and whatever is out there, begging for the chance that all of this would work out for you.  
But for now, at this moment, all Minghao can do is wait, and focus on the way your hand feels in his— a source of comfort in and of itself.  
That's how your mother finds you, actually, on the evening that she deigns to visit.  
Minghao is at your bedside, playing with your fingers, and the two of you are debating over something trivial— the merits of adapting dramas into other languages— with your heads bent together. It would've been negligibly friendly if it weren't for the obvious affection in your petty argument, the way you practically lean into each other's touch.  
That's why it takes a moment for either of you to register that a third person had entered your hospital room. You look up at the sound of a throat clearing, and you're just about to apologize when you register who the silver-haired woman by the entryway is.  
Your spine goes rigid; your eyes, imperceptibly wide. "Eomma," you choke out in a slightly strangled whisper.  
Minghao goes still the moment the word leaves your lips, and his mouth goes dry when he registers the figure at the door. He doesn't exactly know what kind of a relationship the two of you had, but Minghao can only hope, for the sake of politeness and respect, that she doesn't hate him.  
"Hello," he says weakly, his hand tightening almost protectively around yours in a silent gesture of support before he finally rises to greet her. He bows respectfully, clearing his throat to greet your mother appropriately.  
Your mother's scrutinizing gaze flickers over Minghao— everything from his polite bow to the way he had just been holding your hand, moments prior. When she speaks, it's in garbled Korean; there's a hint of a French accent, one that doesn't quite match her Seoul dialect.  
"There's no need for that," your mother tells Minghao, referring to his bow. She's aiming for kindness but comes off, still, as cold. It must come with the nature of her profession; you had once mentioned that your parents were diplomats.   
Minghao forces himself to stay calm and composed, even as the fear of how your mother may react to him sets in the pit of his stomach. He nods his head, but he doesn't quite dare to look her in the eye  
"I'm Xu Minghao, ma'am. I'm here to offer some company," Minghao tries to explain, though he's not sure he's doing the best job of it.  
There's a flicker of recognition on your mother's composed expression. The look of recognition in your mother's eyes puts Minghao slightly at ease, but that doesn't quite erase the nervous tension, the anxiety that thrums against the underside of his very skin.  
"Xu Minghao," she repeats, and you let out a groan when she sounds just a little amused despite her stoic demeanor.  
He waits, just about holding his breath as your mother comes further into the room, stopping in front of the two of you. Minghao shifts awkwardly in his spot, glancing over to you just about nervously, as if waiting for you to take charge of the situation.  
"Eomma," you repeat. This time your voice is a lot more level. You try to ignore the way Minghao seems absolutely scared shitless at your side. "When did you fly in?"  
There's a detached casualness to your mother's response, almost more like you're colleagues than family. "Just this morning," she says. "I'm staying at your grandparents’ for now."  
You dip your head into a nod. There's a pause.  
"Minghao is a member of SEVENTEEN," you say, sounding just slightly resigned at having to remind your mother.  
The older woman turns her gaze back to Minghao, her eyebrows raised slightly. "I'm aware," she says coolly, an edge of amusement in her tone. When she refers to you, she sticks to your full name instead of your nickname. "How is it working with them, Minghao?"  
"They’re wonderful," Minghao answers without hesitation, his answer almost coming out a little too fast.  
He doesn't bother to temper it back, because that's how he feels— and because he believes that your mother needs to know how he feels about working with you, about being around you.  
"Kind," he adds after a moment of pause, looking back over to you, just about begging to be given permission to continue, to gush about you.  
You look straight back at Minghao, barely resisting the urge to vehemently shake your head. You know him. You know how he wants to say more, would probably talk hours and hours about your role as an interpreter if you gave him the green light.  
As you attempt to wordlessly communicate with him through your pointed glare, your mother watches the exchange with growing amusement. Then, just as you always have whenever you wanted to get Minghao talking more—  
"I would hope they were kind," your mother says, though she says the words in Mandarin.  
When your mother speaks in Mandarin, Minghao can't help the rush of gratitude that floods through him, because that only means one thing— that it was okay, that he was encouraged to say more. And so, he does, a small smile on his lips.  
"Kind, thoughtful, patient," he says softly, almost like a litany. "Always on top of things. Brilliant."  
There was something about talking about you in his own language that made everything come so much easier to Minghao. "They make us all look bad," he adds with a soft laugh, though there's a hint of truth behind the words. He means it.  
You made him want to be better to you, more worthy of you, and not just as a person, either.  
As a man, too.  
You stare up at Minghao, exasperated at how a simple change in language had suddenly gotten him so honest. "You shouldn't say all that—" you hiss at him.  
As you go on to tell off Minghao under your breath and he only looks down at you with that completely smitten expression, your mother puts two and two together. One doesn't have to be in the same room as the two of you for too long to recognize it.  
Ah, the older woman thinks to herself. They're in love with each other, and they don't even know it.  
The expression on Minghao's face as you scold him would be better described as that of a puppy who doesn't quite understand what he'd done wrong. His eyebrows furrow, and as you continue to hiss under your breath, he looks like he simply wants to reach out and pull you into a hug because he can't stand it when you fuss over him.  
But he settles for squeezing your fingers once more, his grip tightening, just enough to ground himself when you don't seem to relent in your quiet berating.  
After a moment, your mother clears her throat again. It's a habit of hers that always immediately gets you to shut up.  
"I just wanted to drop by," she says vaguely, switching back to Korean. "But I really must get going. Duty calls."  
"Duty calls," you echo quietly, and your mother's gaze softens imperceptibly.  
"I'll be back later tonight," she reassures you. Her gaze flickers to Minghao for a moment before returning to you. "I trust that you'll be in good hands until then."  
"Eomma," you huff, and your mother looks like she almost might laugh.  
Minghao stays still as he watches you interact with your mother, as he watches her gaze flicker back and forth between the both of you. He can't help the slight smile on his face at the look in your mother's eyes, however, because it's almost like approval.  
She turns to Minghao, this time. Gives him a once-over. You're jolted when your mother suddenly speaks French. It's not anything Minghao will understand— just a brief sentence that is meant for you and you alone. It's almost impertinent; the words are anything but.
Your smile widens, and you respond quietly in the same language.  
Your mother gives Minghao a nod. "Goodbye, Minghao," she says in Korean. "It was a pleasure to meet you."  
Minghao is left looking at you, still holding on to your hand. His eyes flicker down to your smile, a grin of his own blossoming on his lips. "What did you say to each other?" he asks, almost immediately pouting.  
He won't admit it, but he feels almost jealous. The feeling tides over as you absentmindedly note, "It was nothing."    
The smile on Minghao's face turns soft and he squeezes your hand back for good measure, still watching your face even as you slump back against your bed.  
"You're a terrible liar, y'know." He raises your hand to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss against your knuckles. "You know I can read you, right?"  
"She asked me if I agreed with the meaning of your name," you say point blank. "And I said yes. Of course."  
Minghao pauses, his lips still at your knuckles as he absorbs your words.  
He knows what his name means. He's heard it enough in his lifetime. As far as names were concerned, he always considered himself lucky for the fact that he's got a pretty decent one.  
Ming, 明, which meant bright and brilliant. Hao, 浩, which meant grand and vast. Minghao— someone bright, brilliant, vast like the sky.  
But to hear you say it back to him like this? It feels like a revelation in his chest, like you're giving him a gift, something that he can hold on to.  
"Of course," he repeats reverently, his heart a steady thump, thump, thump in his chest.
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The subsequent recovery period is a slow crawl, but it's an easy thing. Minghao fusses more often than not. He ensures you're on top of things— physical therapy, check-ups— and is extra careful about anything that might involve your back.  
Even as you're given the go-ahead to return to work, he frets, having read through one too many articles about the risks of having a discectomy. How strenuous labor and contact sports are still off the table for the foreseeable future. How, now, four weeks after the surgery, you still ought to be careful with routine activities.  
It's as endearing as it is vaguely irksome, especially on instances such as these. The rest of the staff avert their gazes and try not to laugh. The boys look like they're most definitely going to give you grief later on.  
Because Minghao is still adamantly carrying your things as you all head to a shooting location for the newest Going Seventeen episode.  
"Hao," you say through gritted teeth, right at Minghao's heels as he lugs around your duffel bag. "I told you, I can carry that!"  
Despite the slight exasperation in your voice, Minghao can't hide the way the corners of his lips tug into a smile.  
He knows exactly what he's doing and he knows how it makes you feel. But he can't help himself; it's too easy to wind you up. "It's heavy," Minghao insists, despite the fact that it's not that heavy, or that he doesn't actually believe that it is.  
He’s just being a slight nuisance on purpose, something he does often to get your attention.  
"It's not heavy," you seethe, taking extra steps to keep up with Minghao's lithe strides. He’s leading you to one of the company buses that would take all the members and the staff to today's shooting location— some beachside AirBnB along Sokcho.  
"I packed it, for Christ's sake. I know it's not heavy," you insist helplessly, reaching out one hand to tug at the back of Minghao's shirt.  
He's always like this, pushing and prodding and annoying you to get reactions out of you because he finds it amusing. But it has been such a long time since you last properly scolded him, and oh, how he wants you to do it again.  
He stops in his tracks, forcing you to either halt in yours or bump into him. When he pauses, your feet keep moving on their own accord. Your face smashes right into Minghao's back.  
Immediately, your hand that had been grasping his shirt flies to your face. You clutch the bridge of your nose— feeling a slight sting there, following the impact— as you mumble a low chorus of "ow, ow, ow, what the hell..."  
The moment your face smashes into his back, Minghao finds himself doubling over in laughter, his frame shaking as he braces against his knees. The look of pure disbelief on your face is probably one of the funniest things he's seen all week, and the laughter that bubbles up out of his chest is unrestrained and free.  
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry—" he apologizes, his voice wavering in between laughter as he slowly tries to regain his composure. "Are you... are you alright? Does it hurt? Is it broken?"  
"You're insufferable," you huff before stomping ahead of him, making it a point to bump your shoulders as you make a beeline for the bus.  
Minghao only continues to chuckle, shaking his head as he follows after you, his laughter never once dissipating. By the time he reaches the bus, he's still smiling, completely unable to hide the way he keeps grinning.  
Much to Minghao's chagrin, however, you exact your revenge in the smallest way possible: By settling into a seat next to Mingyu, who's always more than a little willing to jump on Minghao's nerves, when given the chance.  
"Sorry, Hao," Mingyu sing-songs, his eyes sparkling with mirth. "But I'm calling dibs for the next two hours. There's an empty seat next to Jun, though!"
Minghao only rolls his eyes, clearly slightly miffed at the way you'd just abandoned him for Mingyu in a heartbeat.
He finds his way to Jun's side, plopping down on the seat next to the other boy with an overdramatic, exaggerated sigh. "He snatched her away from me, ge," he whines, glancing back over to you with that same pout still on his face.
"You made her bump into you, Haohao," Jun points out with another roll of his eyes, shaking his head, though there was still a slight curl on the corners of his lip.
"I'm just having fun! You could at least sympathize with me, Jun.” There's no seriousness behind his words, a tone of complete and utter playfulness, and that only deepens Minghao's smile as he leans back in his chair.
The bus ride drags on, slow and careful, with Mingyu and you chatting about menial things. At one point, he slumps against your side to fall asleep on your shoulder, and you doze off with your cheek pressed to the top of his head. Seokmin takes a photo for posterity purposes.
Jun and Minghao watch from a couple of seats behind, and for a moment, Jun is contemplative.
It's a conscious choice for him to slide into Mandarin. The only other person in the bus who might understand it would be you, and you’re knocked out cold. That means the words are for Minghao alone.
"How much do you like them, Haohao?"
The switch in language catches Minghao's attention, especially when he hears the seriousness in Jun's voice. It's enough for him to pause, lifting his head up from where he'd had his chin resting against his knees.
"Too much, I think," he finally answers, with just a slight hint of hesitation.
It's not because he's ashamed, but because he's never been the kind of person to be so open about his feelings before. He's not even sure he knows how, sometimes.
"There's no going back, now," Jun says, reaching out to lightly nudge Minghao's hip with his own. There's a slight look of concern in his eyes, but he speaks carefully, keeping his voice low as he continues.
"You might be in too deep," Jun continues, his voice a low murmur as he adds. "But I think... if the way they look at you is any indication, they’re right there with you."
The smile that spreads across Minghao's face is blinding, despite the way he turns his gaze down to his shoes. He can't help it— not when his heart is beating fast against his chest, at the idea of you feeling the same way that he does.
He wants it to be true, more than he's ever wanted something to be true in his entire life.
"I should hope so," he says, in an attempt at being flippant, but the way his voice sounds? It would give him away instantly.
When the company bus eventually rolls up onto a gravelly parking lot, the sight beyond the vehicle is one to behold. Sprawling, white sand beaches with glittering waters. The boys are still supposed to film some content, do some challenges, but the prospect of being in somewhere so pretty has significantly boosted everyone's spirits.
Wonwoo rouses Mingyu and you from your sleep. Mingyu chatters aimlessly at your side, only pausing when Minghao comes up to you; of course, the older boy can't resist one last jab.
In full view of Minghao, Mingyu does an infuriating shaka sign in front of his face and mouths 'call me, jagiya', completely unwarranted. It draws a proper snort of laughter out of you. 
"Stop it," Minghao whines as he reaches out to pinch Mingyu, though there's no real heat behind his voice. He doesn't even try to hide that smile on his face, not when he catches the way you laugh.
He can't look away from you once he sets his eyes on you. He's never been able to.
He just hopes that you can't tell exactly how in love he is. Because how is he supposed to tell you he's fallen hard?
The day at the shore flies by faster than any of them expect it to, but in the end, the filming is finally over.
By the time the staff tells them they're finished, the sky is painted in beautiful shades of orange, pink, and purple. It only adds to Minghao's already good mood, especially when he gets the chance to steal you back from Mingyu and get you all to himself.
When filming wraps up and the cameramen all begin to pack their material, the boys take it as a go-ahead to treat the rest of the late afternoon as a beach day.
You smile, mostly to yourself, as they break off— to take photos, to go for a swim, to explore the private beach. All the while, you try to maintain your focus on your laptop, your practiced fingers moving across your keyboard.  
It's why you're initially oblivious to Minghao's stealthy approach.  
Minghao lingers behind for a moment, watching you work. He's already gotten changed, his clothes swapped with swim trunks and a simple black tank top.  
He knows better than to bother you while you're working, and so— to your oblivious self— he's content to stand by and simply watch until you're done. After another moment, his expression softness as he sees how your brow furrows in concentration. Minghao steps in a little closer, one hand coming up to gently ruffle your hair.  
He almost doesn't want you to get back to work and instead considers pulling you up so you can go for a swim with him. He does no such thing, though, settling for patting your cheek once before pulling his hand away.  
You briefly glance up from your laptop so you can flash him a ghost of a smile. There's something to be said about the ways you often communicate without words, how easy it is to just understand.  
You dip your head, give a wave of your hand, turn your gaze back to your laptop. A silent, speechless Go ahead, I'll follow.  
It's like there's nothing he's not feeling right then— just happiness at seeing a smile, and the way that it feels like there's no secrets between the two of you.  
He reaches out to gently pat your cheek once more, his hand lingering for a moment before he pulls away again, turning to make his way out of the tent, the grin on his face still ever-present.  
By the time you're done with your work and changed into some proper swimwear, most of the boys and the staff are already in the water. It's in moments like these when you're reminded why you've stayed with PLEDIS for so long— the ways you're allowed to interact, to just be, when there's no cameras on, no job to do.  
You linger by the shoreline for a beat too long. Before you know it, you're being swept off your feet. Your shriek of surprise pierces across the beach as Jun easily throws you over one shoulder, his hand respectfully bracing the part of your back where there's still marks from your surgery.  
"Sorry, tàiyáng," Jun cheekily says in Mandarin as he rushes the two of you into the water, eliciting laughs from everyone else. He sends you hurtling into the ocean as you scream bloody murder, but you're laughing, still, as you go down.  
Minghao is laughing from where he's standing near the shore, still waist-deep in the water.  He'd heard you scream, but the second he hears the sound of your laugh he knows you're fine and so, instead of rushing to his feet and out of the ocean, he just stays where he is, the smile on his face never faltering.
The sound of your laughter is like music and it's only made better by the way the sunlight dances off the water, reflecting off its shimmering surface like diamonds.
He watches as you resurface, your wet hair in your face as you gasp for breath, your face bright with a smile, and he can't help the way he feels himself falling even deeper in love with you.
He wants to swim over and make sure you're alright, but he knows that Jun won't let anything happen to you. All Minghao does is watch, his grin wide and bright, his eyes never leaving you. He's completely smitten, and right now, the others are just going to have to deal with him being even more of an insufferable, lovestruck fool.
The next couple of moments drag on with light-hearted rough housing, with idle splashing and lazy swimming, until Jun has somehow maneuvered you and him towards where Minghao is in the water.
Jun, behind your back, throws his best friend a conspiratorial wink.
Minghao knows that he can be obvious to an almost comical degree when he's in over his head in his feelings for you, but Jun winking is an entirely different story, and he's already a little wary as Jun brings the two of you over in his direction. 
Even still, nothing could prepare him for the sight of you soaked from head to toe, the water shimmering on your skin in the sunlight as you near him.
Oh, he's screwed, and he's pretty sure Jun and the others know that.
So he does the only thing he can think of.
Minghao dips under the surface of the water and disappears, ducking under the water for a few seconds before he comes back up just behind you, and reaches out to tickle your sides. If he's going to be an idiot and fall all over you, he might as well try and cover it up with a little bit of playfulness.
"Yah, don't do that!" you cry, already rounding in a futile attempt to stop Minghao. You weren't particularly ticklish, but something about the cool water and the warm breeze has you feeling more sensitive than necessary. Breathless laughter escapes you as you try to capture Minghao's wrists, to stop him from his actions.  
Jun quietly pads away, with the pleased air of someone having done his job well. Some of the other boys share knowing glances— like they know they ought to intervene— but it's Seungcheol who shakes his head, who wordlessly calls everyone off.  
The leader, telling his members in the most subtle way, Let Minghao have this.  
There are words he wants to say when you reach for his wrists to stop his actions, to ask if you want to join him in diving under the water with him, but words have never been his strong suit.  
No, it's actions that are his strength. And so, instead of asking if you'd like to join him, Minghao does just that, wrapping his arms around your waist and ducking the both of you under the water, the salt in the water stinging his eyes a slight bit as he opens them briefly beneath the surface.  
And then he brings you back up for air, the look on his face almost triumphant as he laughs, shaking his head to rid himself of the water that's plastered all over his hair and face.  
When you emerge, you laugh in between gasps for air, and instinctively reach up to push aside the wet strands of hair sticking to Minghao's face. "Look at you," you say disapprovingly, but you're betrayed by the pure, unadulterated adoration in your tone.  
"You love this look on me, xīngān," he insists, with that same wide grin on his face.  
And, well, he's not wrong. He can see the way your gaze lingers on his face, even as you scold him and ruffle his wet hair teasingly.  
It makes him wonder what it'd be like if all the what-ifs were real, if this was a relationship rather than an almost. He's almost afraid to wish for it. As if wanting it too much might break it.  
Minghao likes the way that you press close to him, and he keeps his arm wrapped snugly around your waist as you talk and laugh and joke with the others.  
It almost feels right, the way you're right there next to him. Even though this isn't a relationship, the easy way that you slot right next to him is comforting, because it almost makes what isn't feel more like what it could be.  
He wants the taste of you to be something more than just a taste. He wants more than a simple bite.
And so, that's how he finds himself suggesting that the two of you go on a walk together once the sun starts to set. There's a slight flush to his cheeks as he asks the question, a shy little smile on his face as he murmurs it.
He wants a chance to be alone with you. He thinks he deserves that much, especially now, after spending the rest of the day having been teased and prodded and jabbed at by the others about his feelings for you.
"Sure," you say coolly, somehow managing to keep your voice level. "Let me just grab my stuff."  
That's how you and Minghao end up breaking off from everyone else, kicking up the sand underneath your feet as you go. There's a couple of jeers here and there; Seungcheol warns you both to be back before dark.  
You take it in stride as you go on ahead, your shoulders just barely brushing. Like you're absolutely helpless to the pull of gravity that tries to keep you together.  
Once the other boys are out of sight, out of earshot, Minghao finds himself growing slightly less shy as you walk side by side, the two of you headed for a small cliffside pathway.  
His gaze is drawn to you rather quickly— to the way the ocean breeze makes your hair blow about, the way you almost shine when the sunlight hits you. The way your hand is so tantalizingly close. His own almost aches to reach out and take yours.  
"You know," he says instead, his lips quirking up into a little cheeky grin that makes his dimple show when he sees the path lined with flowers. Some of them blooming, some small clusters of white blooms scattered around the cliffside.  
Minghao plucks one of the blooms from its plant and tucks it into your hair so it's just behind your ear. He has to focus to not notice the way his fingers skim your cheek, and god, you're so close.  
"I think you look pretty like this," he says, and the words are whispered out like a little confession. He picks another of the blooms, and offers it to you, his smile bright, genuine. "Take it. For good luck, maybe."  
When he extends to you one of the white blooms with that gorgeous, dimpled grin, you chuckle quietly. You take the flower. You hold it in your fingers for just a beat.  
And then you stand on your tiptoes to mimic Minghao's action— tucking the bloom right above his ear.  
"You're all the good luck that I need, xīngān," you say laughingly, in Minghao's mother tongue.  
Minghao melts, his lips parting in the slightest as he stares at you like you're a vision, like you're something to worship. He's already far too gone on you and the moment he feels your fingertips against his skin, he decides he'll never be able to get over you, not if it takes him years to try to do it.  
There, the two of you stand, looking at each other with an unspoken, shared admiration, standing in front of a cliffside that overlooks the ocean with the sun setting against it, the horizon all burning shades of amber and orange and red.  
This is a moment that Minghao won't forget, and he takes your hand in his, slowly interlacing your fingers together to see if you'll let him.  
Just to know that there's a little bit of a chance that his dreams could come true, someday.  
Your fingers find purchase in the spaces between Minghao's, slotting there as if it was something meant to be. As if the two of you might have the right.  
For a moment, neither of you really say anything as you look out to the glittering expanse of ocean, the sun setting right beneath the horizon. It's a little too picture perfect.  
Exactly the reason why neither Minghao nor you dare to verbalize whatever this is, whatever you've been dancing around for years and years. Minghao wants to tell you everything, tell you that he loves you, maybe get down on his knees and kiss your hands, ask you to be his and to let him be yours.  
But he stays there. Silent. Holding your hand by your side.
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When you head back to everyone— where food is being served for the members and the staff— there's a bit of an exaggerated welcome from all sides. The boys all jeer, and the staff give you side-eyes, but you only shake your head slightly as you peel away from Minghao's side.  
The words stay unspoken. The red thread of fate, the one that Minghao so firmly believes in, draws out for another moment more.  
As you go to shoot back some drinks with your team, Mingyu sidles up to Minghao's side. The older man presses a sweating bottle of beer into Minghao's hand.  
"Still not tonight, huh?" Mingyu asks with no shortage of amusement.  
The beer in his hand is cold enough that it would be a little uncomfortable to hold onto if Minghao weren't so used to it, but he simply wraps his fingers around the bottle and takes a half-hearted sip from it.  
His lips purse as he hears Mingyu's question, a frown crossing his face.  
"No. We didn't talk about anything," he says, somewhat regretfully, because tonight just felt like it could have been the right night to say something. To finally admit how he feels, to finally ask what he wants to ask.  
And maybe you would deny him, tell him that you just wanted to be his friend, but he'd take it. He'd take anything if it meant he could stay in your life—  
Or maybe you'd even say yes, and he could finally have a chance to prove himself to you.  
"Are you going to try again tomorrow?" Mingyu asks, taking a sip of his own beer, his eyebrows raising a little.  
Another sigh falls from Minghao's lips and he nods, his gaze softening as he looks in your direction, watching you smile in spite of the way he aches to be by your side.  
"Of course I'm going to try again tomorrow," he whispers, and he'll do that for the rest of his life if he has to.  
The night drags on with everyone getting progressively more drunk. Soonyoung is reduced to tears at one point, while Seungkwan puts on an enthusiastic, one-man performance of Aju Nice. 
And maybe Minghao drinks a little more than he usually does, partly because Mingyu and Jun take advantage of the fact that it's a rare thing for them to be drinking with you within the vicinity.  
Minghao's best friends are menaces who want to see what type of drunk he is, who want to see how it will affect the way he approaches you. He's always been a little quiet when he's drunk— the type of drunk with a slight permanent blush to his cheeks, with a lazy grin on his face, with thoughts too slurred or in Mandarin for most of the boys to understand.  
And tonight was no different, with his face flushed from alcohol and his words so slurred that all Mingyu and Jun can pick up is the word pretty over and over, along with a couple of other words in Mandarin. But he's always been honest when he's drunk— almost too much so.  
Jun is a bit stressed having to play interpreter for Minghao's drunken, Mandarin rumblings, but it's all worth it when Mingyu tosses his head back with raucous laughter at every word spilling from Minghao's lips, translated by Jun.  
"This is too much," Jun whines once the three of them have worked on a significant amount of soju. A glassy-eyed Mingyu nods in agreement, though neither of them are as bad as the notoriously lightweight Minghao.  
"Haohao, are you going to go up to her or what?" Mingyu teases.  
Another slurred word in Mandarin falls from Minghao's lips upon hearing that, his eyebrows knitting together for a moment as he pouts at Mingyu.
It's almost comical to see, to hear Minghao's usually soft and lilting voice falter, all while his cheeks stay a soft pink and his hair is a mess from how he's been running his hand through it.
The thought of approaching you makes his stomach churn, but he knows that he will. After this next shot. Just one more drink.
"Ge, you said you'd only drink one," Jun murmurs, a bit of concern seeping in his tone as he sees Minghao grab shakily yet another shot glass of soju.
Of course, he ignores their warnings for the moment as he downs the shot, his face growing pinker as he shakes his head and pushes himself to his feet.
It takes him a moment to gain his footing, his legs a little wobbly from alcohol, but he gets it. Mingyu laughs so hard that tears come out of his eyes. Jun, distressed, shoots back some more alcohol.
Minghao's vision is a little blurry, but you're just within his sight. And so, with Jun and Mingyu watching from behind, he makes his way towards you.
He's got a lopsided grin on his face, his cheeks a little pink, and he thinks he must be in love in a moment like this.
"Xīngān," he slurs, a slight hiccup following the word as he stops in front of you, his vision still a little fuzzy. He raises his hand to gently rub the back of his neck, his tone a little softer— and a bit more earnest— as he murmurs his invitation. “Can we talk for a minute?”
"Hey, you," you greet, readjusting the flower that he'd placed behind your ear. "Having fun?"  
Minghao shakes his head, his lips parting to say no only to dissolve back into soft little hiccuping giggles instead. Of course he's having fun— how could he not, when his love is right there, and he gets to see you smiling and laughing and tipsy yourself?  
He stumbles forward, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and pulling you in, his free hand coming up to your face as he squishes your cheeks and gives you a bright, gummy smile. "Are you having fun, xīngān?" he asks.  
"I'm having fun, Hao," you concede laughingly, resting your other hand at his waist to keep yourself steady. It's— once again— a position that implicates you a little more than it should, but everyone's varying levels of drunk anyway.  
This isn't the drunk Minghao, exactly, that everyone has seen. This is the one he so rarely allows anyone to witness, the one who gets clingy and a little emotional. He's usually much more capable of keeping his composure, even with alcohol loosening his tongue and his inhibitions, but he just can't manage to focus on anything but you tonight.
"Come run away with me," he murmurs. He tugs you against his side again, a little less carefully this time. He wants the closeness, tonight, as he leads the two of you over to the chairs loosely surrounding a warm bonfire.  
It's mostly the other boys here— Joshua and Vernon practicing an acoustic guitar, Jihoon chatting with the co-producer everyone knew he had a bit of a thing for. They all watch with mild amusement as Minghao drunkenly stumbles over to one of the chairs, single-minded in his ambition of sharing a single seat.  
He plops down onto the chair, tugging you right into his lap. He's so close to you then, his lips next to your ear as he wraps his arms snug around your waist, his legs on either side of you, pressing you close against him.  
"I missed you," he murmurs, and the words are slurred, warm on the shell of your ear as he presses his face into the crook of your neck and exhales softly for a moment.  
He's drunk. And in love. And that's a dangerous combination.  
You press your fingers into Minghao's knee, your shoulders shaking with quiet laughter. "How could you miss me?" you whisper back. "I was right there the whole night, xīngān."  
He shakes his head, burying his face into the crook of your neck, mumbling softly. "You were far," he pouts, his words a little more garbled than before. He has no sense of personal space right now, with you pressed so close against him, and he's more prone to whine to get his way. 
He wants this. He wants you close. He wants you. 
"Is that so?" you say sympathetically, the words coming out almost like a coo. "You have me now, though." 
"I'm never letting you go," he responds.  
There's still an almost childish part of him that thinks if he says it, like this, with you wrapped up in his arms, with your face flushed from alcohol, that maybe you'll stay by his side.  
He just has one question that he wants an answer for.  
"Will you hold my hand," his words are slurred, his fingers tracing along the small of your back, up, down, back up again, "and look at the moon with me?"
Wordlessly, you reach for his hand at the small of your back and you thread your fingers together. You keep your intertwined hands over your thigh as you lean just a little further into Minghao until he's pressed against the back of the chair and you're practically lying on top of him.  
It's easier, this way, for you to tilt your head back and do exactly as he asked. "Moon," you point out with your free hand, the word coming out in Mandarin. Yuèliàng. "It's a crescent moon tonight, see?"  
With his arm securely around your waist, he presses closer still to look at the moon together, his words still a stammer as he murmurs, "Yeah. Just like us."  
The words have no logic, not when he's drunk and soft and clingy like this. But he's still happy with it.  
"Just like us?" you echo, and you briefly wonder if you're just a little too tipsy; if you'd missed a chapter or two about how you could be compared to the waxing crescent. Your eyebrows furrow in mild confusion, though you quickly realize there's no point in worrying your head when you could just ask.  
"I'm the moon, and you're the flower," he declares, with all the confidence of his own drunken logic, his eyes falling to look at the flower still tucked behind your ear. He reaches up a hand to brush his fingers against the side of your face. 
If not for the alcohol, he might be too shy to admit how pretty you are to him. 
"We're a matched set, xīngān," he says.   
The smile that breaks out on your face, then, is bright and wide and warm, rivaled only by the bonfire raging a couple of feet away. Your friends are still chattering amongst themselves, completely oblivious to Minghao's bold declaration.
A matched set. And you're just a little out of it, just a little drunk yourself, as you mindlessly link Minghao and your pinkies together. It's a quiet promise on its own. An assurance that this was something that could happen, would happen, at the right time.  
"My moon," you concede, calling Minghao with a breathless sort of giggle. "My moon, my xīngān, my Hao."  
"I love it when you speak Mandarin," he admits, his words warm against your temple as he presses closer still, his lips a few centimeters from your skin.  
He has too much alcohol in his system, too little a filter for his thoughts, and right now, Minghao's world consists only of you and how you look in the moonlight— like some kind of vision, like something he'd write about in a song.  
"Say it again," he instructs, his tone gentle. A request. Never a command.  
"Which part do you want me to say again?" you ask in Mandarin, because Minghao had said he loved it when you spoke in it and you'd be damned not to give in.  
It's all the same to him. The gentle words that come tumbling from your lips— he doesn't need to understand the meaning, he just wants to hear you speak. 
Because how you sound when you speak Mandarin is lovely, and Minghao can't help but lean in just a little to drink in the sound of it, his fingers tracing along the exposed skin of your upper back.  
He's never cared or loved the way he does when he's speaking Mandarin. But you, when you speak to him, it sounds like poetry.  
"Anything," he murmurs. "Just say anything."  
You tilt your head back up to the sky, where none of the usual Seoul light pollution is barring you from seeing the stars. When you see the expanse of the Big Dipper, you stick to what you know.  
A Korean myth from your yesteryears, one that he hadn’t heard of in his own childhood.  
"Once upon a time, deep in the mountains, lived a mother and her seven sons," you start softly, in Mandarin, as per Minghao's request. You tell the story almost in a whisper— the cold winter, the seven brothers, the Jade Emperor of Heaven.  
A part of you, in the language that was a part of Minghao.
As you tell the fable, the alcohol settles comfortably in Minghao’s system. He feels sobered by the fact that you’re so close, that you’re indulging him in the way that you always do. So much, he thinks again. You give me so much. 
And yet it’s not enough, still. He thinks back to the Korean phrase he once sought you out for. Intuition. Zhíjué. 
Your story is winding to a close when he decides to trust his gut, this time. His arms tighten around your waist and he buries his face into the back of your shoulder.
"I love you," he says. Wǒ ài nǐ.
You pause. He can hear the smile in your tone as you respond, "I love you, too." Wǒ yě ài nǐ. 
But, no. Minghao is done. He won’t let this pass, won’t let miscommunication take this away from him. He has spent the better half of his twenties grasping at straws, bridging gaps in languages; this will not be another one of those things that he can’t say. He takes a fortifying breath. 
He doesn’t care if you don’t believe in soulmates. If he’s the only one who thinks there’s a red string tied between you two. He’ll subscribe to your credo of destiny; he’ll do all the work. 
"I’m in love with you," he amends. Wǒ ài shàngle nǐ.
He says it in his language, because it feels right, but then he repeats it in yours so there’s no room for you to misunderstand. It doesn’t change, anyway. Korean, Mandarin. English, Japanese. 
Minghao is helplessly, hopelessly in love with you. 
It feels like forever before you respond. 
When you do, it’s in Mandarin. "Me, too," you admit, and he peeks at you enough just to see the way you’re gazing up at the night sky. He catches the hint of the smile on your face; the sincerity of which threatens to bowl him over. 
You repeat his words— I’m in love with you— in Mandarin, then Korean, then English, then Japanese. Then all the other languages you know. 
Minghao resists the urge to tell you to stop, to tell you it’s okay. He holds you tight, laughing quietly, as he basks in what feels a lot like the beginning of something. 
It’s okay, he wants to say as you confess to him in Spanish, in Portuguese, in Italian. 
I hear you. 
I hear you loud and clear. 
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beloveds-embrace · 1 day ago
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Helloo!!
Can i request a poly!141 with like a reader who is super spiritual, or like maybe is a witch?? I'm curious as to how authors would write it!
Please and thank you!
Okay but covens being like bonds? Pack bonds? Soulmate bonds?? Yes.
It’s late, and the forest is alive with the sounds of nightfall. Flickering candlelight glows in a protective circle around you as you settle into place, heart fluttering in anticipation. You’ve been waiting for this- the night when the ritual will bind your coven. A deep soul bond, tying you to the men you trust more than anyone else in the world. Trust that did not come easy, but will also not fall easy. Trust earned and cherished.
Johnny appears first, his grin breaking through the shadows like sunshine, like the silver lining found on any dark cloud. He looks at you with the spark of mischief that always makes your heart beat faster and your grin widen in equal excitement. “Didnae think we’d be bondin’ like this, aye?” he teases, nudging your shoulder before settling down next to you, pecking a little kiss on your warm cheek. “Magic an’ all- it’s still mad tae me, even though I grew up wi’ it.”
“Wild’s one way to put it,” Kyle murmurs as he steps into the circle, casting a knowing look at Johnny. His smile is soft as he takes his place on your other side, fingers brushing against yours in a silent hello, and then intertwines your fingers in a gentle squeeze. “Evening, baby.”
You smile, squeezing back. “Evening, love.” His presence alone is enough to calm the beating of your heart, soothed and lulled. You adore him.
Simon joins you all then, a looming, quiet presence wrapped in the darkness of the night. He moves without a sound, but his energy is magnetic, always pulling you in. He’d always huff in amusement whenever you’d nestle in his lap and insist that he was like the heaviest star in the galaxy, always drawing you in the orbit of his gravity. And now, his gloved hand touches yours, gentle yet firm, and you feel the warmth of his magic seeping into you, grounding you.
Finally, John arrives, bringing with him a feeling of such steadfastness and strength you know you can always depend on him- a mountain, unbending against all forces. He kneels across from you, completing the circle, his warm gaze softened further by the candlelight. Always made you so warm and cozy whenever he’d looked at you like that. “Ready, darlin’?” he asks, his voice a quiet rumble that fills the clearing.
With a nod, you take a deep breath, holding out your hands. Each of them reaches forward, linking their hands with yours until the five of you are connected. The moment your hands clasp, you feel it- a surge of energy flowing through you, powerful and comforting all at once. Your heart pounds in rhythm with theirs, the pulsing magic binding you all together like an invisible thread- one that turns into visible ink on your conjoined hands and fingers, golden like the sun.
You speak the incantation, each word drawing out your power, your intentions, your love. The air hums as the bond settles into place, weaving around each of you in turn. Warmth blooms in your chest, growing stronger as the spell reaches its peak. The sensation is overwhelming, but it’s right, as natural as breathing.
When the magic fades, you’re left feeling… whole. Connected in a way you’ve never been before and leaves you uteerly breathless for a few, simple seconds. You open your eyes and see your coven looking back at you, each face filled with the same wonder and warmth.
Johnny grins, squeezing your hand. “So, that’s it, huh? No backing out now, our witch.”
Kyle chuckles, his thumb brushing over your knuckles. The golden ink is slowly dimming, but you swear you can still feel it engrave itself under your skin, welcomed. “Guess you’re stuck with us.”
Simon’s silence is filled with a sense of unspoken understanding, his gaze warm under his mask and he doesn’t lift his eyes off you at all, only to close them when you let go of Johnny and Kyle’s hands to cup his face. Words are needed between the two of you. Never has been, really.
John gives you a small nod, gripping where your shoulder and neck meet firmly. The touch sends sparks through you, and you can see his smile deepen. “This is family,” he says softly, his voice filled with a quiet strength. “Always. You’ve always been ours, witch, but now you are fully ours.”
In that moment, you know- this isn’t just magic. It’s a promise, a bond forged by more than spells. It’s love, protection, and loyalty, and as you sit there with your coven, you know you’ll never face the world alone.
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lovegalor333 · 2 days ago
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˖ ᡣ𐭩 ⊹ ࣪ ౨ৎ˚₊✧˚ · .
you’re gonna be ok (paige x reader)
summary: you’re going through a tough time and have pushed paige away but she finally realises something is wrong
content warnings: talks of depression and ed behaviours/language
requested by: @melpthatsme 💗
Your girlfriend was getting suspicious and rightly so. You had just given her another lame excuse as to why you couldn’t have dinner with her tonight. That was the third time this week.
At first it was ‘too much homework’, then a ‘headache’ and now it was your ‘period’. All lies.
As you lay curled up in your bed, all lights turned off, you sobbed silent tears until your pillow was saturated. You felt guilty lying to Paige but you couldn’t go out, especially not to eat.
You wasn’t entirely sure why Paige even wanted to be seen in public with you anyway, why she was with you at all actually. Paige was beautiful. Like the most beautifully perfect woman there ever was. Her eyes shone bright at all times and whether her hair was pulled into a tight ponytail or left natural and loose, framing her face, it looked immaculate. She was intelligent and athletic, maintaining an almost perfect GPA while simultaneously leading her team in back to back wins. Paige was everything and you, you were nothing.
You hated everything about yourself and you were usually good at hiding it. Painting on a fake smile and laughing when others laughed, mirroring your friends actions to make it seem like everything was just fine but it was getting harder to hide. You were drinking and smoking just to get respite from your thoughts. You were dragging yourself to gatherings just to count down the minutes until you could leave and be alone in your room where you could finally let your guard down.
You were proud at how long you had gone keeping this to yourself but it was almost impossible now. You didn’t want to talk. You didn’t want to leave the apartment. You didn’t want to eat. You didn’t want to see anyone. In fact, you didn’t want to see yourself. You had even gone as far to cover every mirror in your room just to avoid the reflection that made you sick to your stomach.
You felt like you had cried a river this past week but the tears wouldn’t stop, you thought there would be nothing left to give but you were a never ending pit of sadness.
You hear shuffling and muffled voices coming from your living room, your roommates must be home. You thanked yourself for keeping your lights off and closed your eyes so if they came into your room, they’d think you were sleeping.
A few seconds past before you heard a light knock at your door. You ignored it. Pressing yourself further into your mattress, wishing it would swallow you whole. Then came the click of the handle being turned and the door squeaking open.
You kept your body as still as possible, holding your breath in hopes that whoever was disturbing you would think twice but that doesn’t happen. Instead your bedroom light is flicked on and your door is closed with force, practically slammed.
“Why did you lie to me?” You recognise Paiges voice immediately and it’s a mixture of pissed off but also upset and you know it’s your fault.
“What?” You say, even though you heard her loud and clear.
“I know you’re not on your period. Our cycles are synced. They have been for months. Why did you lie?” Paige asks again and you feel so stupid for making such a rookie error.
Paige was right. Your cycles were synced, it happened often with women and girls that spent a lot of time together, so when you were on your period, she was too. She had caught you out in your lie.
“I don’t know.” You mummble into your duvet, still curled up tightly.
“You’ve blown me off three times this week. You barely answer my calls and texts, it’s like I have to force you to see me and now you’re lying to me and you can’t even be bothered to tell me why?” Paige rants and even though you still haven’t looked at her you can tell she’s pacing your room.
“I don’t understand what’s going on. I thought we were good but maybe not.” She says and you physically feel your heart brake at her words but you can’t bring yourself to say anything other than, “Maybe.”
“What?” She asks confused even though she was the one who said it first, “Y/N, can you at least fucking look at me?” She snapped and you know thats the least you owe her so you slowly roll yourself around so you’re no longer facing the wall and push yourself up into a sitting position but you can’t bring yourself to lift your eyes from your lap.
“I wanted to take you for dinner, spend some time with you. Just be with you and I thought you would have wanted the same but instead you’re in bed!” Paige continued and you just took her onslaught of words, you didn’t have the energy to argue or even defend yourself.
“I’m sorry.” You muttered, picking at the already raw skin around your nails.
“Will you just look at me? Do you want to break-” You finally look at Paige and she stops mid-sentence, “Have you been crying?”
You ignore her question because your heart is racing and more tears are threatening to fall at what she was about to ask, “Finish what you were about to say.” You whisper but she doesn’t need to, you knew what she was going to say. She was going to ask if you wanted to break up.
“What’s the matter? What happened? Why were you crying?” Paige asks all at once, any annoyance in her tone has been replaced with concern and her facial expression shifted from dark and frowning to soft and doe eyed.
“I wasn’t.” You lie, “Finish what you were about to say.”
“Yes you were. Your eyes are red and puffy, your skin is blotchy,” She walks towards you, “and your pillows wet. Why were you crying?”
“You want to break up.” You answer your own question.
“No. No, I don’t. But I don’t understand what’s going on with you, I thought maybe you did.” She says honestly sitting on the edge of your bed.
“I don’t.”
“Why were you crying baby? Tell me what’s on your mind.” She says placing a hand on your leg.
“I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“It’s too much Paige. My mind is too much, it’s too dark. You don’t deserve that.” You begin to cry again and it quickly turns into sobs.
“Hey, baby, come here.” She whispered, pulling you into her chest and onto her lap, she wrapped her arms around your body and held you close, “You’re scaring me.” She admits, “Tell me what’s going on my love. I want to help you.”
“You deserve more than this Paige.” You choke out in between sobs, you’re hyperventilating now, your body shaking in your girlfriends arms but she continues to hold you tight and close.
“But I want you. I love you.” She pulls away from you slightly so she can look you in your eyes and she holds your face tenderly, a hand on each cheek, “You’re all I want, my beautiful girl.”
“Don’t say that.” You weep, jumping out of her lap.
“Don’t say what?”
“Don’t say I’m beautiful. Don’t say any of it. It’s not true.” You cross your arms over yourself wishing you could shrink down into the smallest dimensions and eventually disappear.
“Baby, what are you saying? What’s going on?” She reaches out for you but you pull away not wanting to be touched.
Paige properly looks around your room for the first time and you watch as she notices everything and you see the cogs turning in her head as her eyes fall to your mirror, covered by a sweater. She sees the paper taped to your wall with your weight written on it followed by the harshest of words that you thought about yourself. She sees the empty alcohol bottles on your dresser and the half smoked blunt on your bedside table. And when she finally looks at you, in your oversized clothes, arms wrapped tightly around yourself, her eyes were glossy and her forehead creased as she fought back tears of her own.
“I don’t know what’s going on in your head, but I do know that I do love you and you are beautiful and I’ll tell you that everyday until you believe it.” She says as a tear slips down her cheek.
Paige walks over to you, taking you by your hands first and kissing both of them. She pulls on the sleeves of your sweater and you reluctantly let her pull it over your head so your just standing there in your bra. You close your eyes not wanting to see her reaction to your body, the thought of it made you sick. You felt her lips press to your stomach and she peppered kisses up your torso, “My beautiful baby.” She mumbled against your skin as she continued to kiss over your chest and onto your neck.
She took you to your bed, laying you down and she hooked her fingers into the waistband of your joggers, pulling them off, exposing your legs. You wanted to grab the sheet and cover yourself up but her mouth met your thigh and she pecked it gently, moving over the the other, “So perfect.” She breathed, the tips of her fingers trailing down your legs.
You lay on your bed, eyes closed, tears streaming out and you feel Paige hover above you, “Look at me baby.” She says softly, wiping the tears that soaked your cheeks. You flutter your eyes open and look up at Paige who’s looking down at you, eyes filled with nothing but love and care. “Please don’t shut me out. I’m here for you. Anything you need me to do, I’ll do it. I just want you to be OK. I need you to be OK. You’re everything to me.” She says, blue eyes locked on yours.
“Can you just hold me tonight?” You sniffle. “Of course.”
Paige lays on your bed, pulling you into her arms, she presses her lips to your head before her fingers find your hair and she runs through it gently, “You’re gonna be OK.” She whispers comfortingly. “You promise?”
“I promise.”
˖ ᡣ𐭩 ⊹ ࣪ ౨ৎ˚₊✧˚ · .
a/n: i wrote this so tired so forgive any mistakes 😭 already want to write a part 2 🥺🥺
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solxamber · 2 days ago
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Romance Clichés With: Idia Shroud
Cliché: The Dramatic Save
Others: Leona ; Vil ; Azul ; Kalim
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The thing about Idia is that he’s very used to lurking in the background. Life is much simpler that way. But ever since you’d started spending more time with him, he’d found himself in the wildest, most "otome game" situations imaginable. And today? Today topped them all.
You’d been standing together in the courtyard, him telling you about his latest game finds, hands shoved into his pockets as he tried not to fidget too much. It was rare he got to hang out with someone he, uh, actually wanted to hang out with, so his nerves were pinging off the charts.
That’s when it happened.
With zero warning, a large, heavy textbook teetered off the edge of a windowsill above and began its rapid descent towards Idia’s head. He didn’t notice; he was too busy stammering about his latest high score. But you did.
In one swift move, you threw yourself across the space between you and practically flew through the air, hands outstretched like some overdramatic action hero.
You managed to get between him and the descending missile (okay, just a textbook, but in the moment, it was deadly), and though the impact wasn’t as dramatic as you’d pictured, you still managed to shield him with your entire being, shoving him safely aside.
By the time he realized what was going on, you were already fussing over him. “Oh my gosh, are you okay?! Did it hit you anywhere?”
He blinked, processing what just happened as you started checking his head for bumps, squinting at his shocked face. “Uh… w-what?” he stammered, brain catching up about three seconds too late. “Did… did you just… jump in front of me?” The look of awe on his face was equal parts adorable and ridiculous.
“Well, obviously!” You laughed, still fussing, hands on his shoulders. “Are you alright?”
Idia’s mouth opened and closed as he tried to process the sheer amount of romance that just smacked him in the face. You, his crush, his dream come to life, had gone full protagonist, for him. It was like the best tropes had all collided in his brain at once, and it was overwhelming in the best way possible.
“N-No one’s ever done something like that… f-for me…” he mumbled, cheeks reddening as he stared at you with this helpless, smitten look.
You tilted your head, a soft smile crossing your face. “Well, I’d do it again if it meant keeping you safe, Idia.”
Somewhere in his brain, the confetti cannons were going off. The “love meter” hit max. The screen flashed “TRUE ENDING” in bold, sparkly letters. He knew it was all real, but a tiny part of him felt like he’d accidentally triggered some hidden route with a secret character, and that character was you.
And before he could stop himself, the words tumbled out of his mouth in a rush. “I think I’m in love with you. Like, maybe have been for a while. You’re like, the one or something, and—oh my god, why am I saying this out loud—”
He clamped a hand over his mouth, wide-eyed, as if he could just take it back if he tried hard enough. But instead, he saw you looking at him, your smile widening as you took his hand, gently pulling it down.
“You mean it?” you asked, a bit of awe creeping into your voice.
He couldn’t look at you, his eyes darting everywhere except your face as he mumbled, “Y-Yeah, I mean, yeah, I do. I can’t believe you’re real, honestly, this feels like a fever dream, but—”
Before he could talk himself out of it, you leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his lips, quick and sweet. It was enough to short-circuit his brain, and when you pulled back, he just blinked, stunned, frozen like his internal processing unit had just maxed out.
“Does that answer your question?” you teased, unable to hold back a little laugh at his flustered expression.
“Uh-huh,” he finally managed, a dopey smile creeping onto his face as his brain rebooted. “Y-Yeah… yes.” He cleared his throat, trying to seem cooler, but the blush on his cheeks was a dead giveaway.
And as you both stood there, your hands still linked, he felt like the luckiest player in the world—like he’d stumbled upon the rarest, sweetest route of them all, and he wasn’t letting go anytime soon.
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p0ckykiss · 3 days ago
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prank gone wrong - nishimura riki
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summary -> ni-ki's silly april fool's prank sends you to the hospital
-> established relationship
the prank had gone too far.
in retrospect, niki should probably have checked everything before messing around with the food.
as a result, you had to be taken to the hospital due to food poisoning and niki feels horrible now. it turns out that some of the ingredients niki used were past their due date for months and, although they smelled just fine, they were not supposed to be eaten at all.
and you, being you, didn’t check and just wolfed down what was given to you. niki’s plan for his april fool’s prank was just mixing up something that tasted bad but looked like it was good. he didn’t try it though and you ate the whole thing, saying it was not bad at all, have you been practicing? with a smile on your lips.
the result was disastrous. your friend had taken you to the hospital himself - and has just now asked niki to stay and keep you company.
as it seems, you had fallen asleep due to the nausea medicine you were given, and the doctor said you could leave as soon as you wake up since you’re all good now but it’s taking longer than expected.
“i’ll just get a taxi to the company,” he says to niki and gives him the car keys. “you drive back safely and let me know when you make it there.”
he only nods and hope the face he’s making is a thankful one because he had panicked when you suddenly stood up from the couch and ran to the bathroom ten minutes after eating the “food” he made and your friend had to step in and take the reins.
“thanks,” niki finally mumbles something but he is already gone.
niki is sitting down on a bench that’s not so far from the room you are sleeping in right now. he would’ve gone in, but he sent your friend instead. it was a shared room and only one visitor per patient was allowed, niki didn’t want to face you yet.
now he’s the one in charge and, although he wants to stall their reunion, niki stands up and takes slow steps until he’s standing in front of the door.
the nurses are taking care of the patient on the end of the room and you are still sound asleep, chest heaving up and down calmly and niki sighs in relief.
no one pays him attention and he shyly sits down on the stool placed right by your bed.
niki stares at the hand sliding down the mattress and is about to reach out when you pull it back under the bedsheets.
niki looks up to glance at your peaceful sleeping face but is met with a glare.
“were you trying to kill me?” you ask, eyes still trained on niki’s face.
“why would I try to kill you?” he stutters back at you, nervously rubbing his hands together. “i’d never do that.”
you huff.
“you were eagerly offering me what you made,” you explain and niki sighs at least twice before covering his face with both hands. “i thought you were trying to get rid of me.”
“it was supposed to be a harmless prank,” niki whispers and doesn’t dare look you in the eye. “i didn’t know the food was not good anymore and it was not aimed at you. my plan was giving it to the first person who showed up in the kitchen, it just happened to be you.”
“so it was not a targeted attack on me?” you whisper and niki looks up when he hears soft laughter. “i won’t hold it against you then.”
“i’m really sorry,” niki pouts and jumps up when he sees you are sitting up. he tries to help you up and gets his hands slapped away.
you glare at him.
“it was just food poisoning”
you leave the bed and fold the bedsheets, niki watches in silence. “it’s not like you ran over me with a car. i can walk and do things by myself just fine. i’m fine now but you’re lucky i’m not too mad right now.”
oh god, if you were bedridden because of that, niki would not hear the end of it.
in amidst his thinking, you leave niki for a second to ask something to a nurse who’s in the room and come back quickly.
“she said we can leave and that I’m dismissed,” you say solemnly, gathering your belongings that were on the small table by the bed and urging niki out of the room. “i just need to hand this clipboard at the front desk before we exit the hospital.”
you wave said clipboard in front of niki’s eyes and takes large steps out of the room and towards the front desk. you were on the ground floor, so everything was done fast, with niki only watching as you do all the talking with the staff.
“how are we going back to the apartment?” you ask as soon as you both are out of the hospital. the wind that hits your faces is cold and niki is reminded that although winter has ended, the chilly weather still remains and he shivers, buttoning his overcoat up. he turns to look at you and feels terrible because you only have a thin sweater on since you left the dorms in a rush, there was no time or space to think about grabbing a jacket for you.
without thinking, niki unbuttons his overcoat and hands it to you and earns himself a funny look from you.
“what are you doing?” you ask, brow raised, and lips pressed together in a straight line.
“trying to be a nice boyfriend after almost killing you,” niki mutters, shoving the overcoat in your hands. “your friend left us with the car but it’s parked a little far,” he starts walking in the direction he remembers it is.
they walk in silence and niki smiles to himself when he sees you have decided to wear his warm overcoat, the sky blue one he loves the most.
the car is parked five blocks from where they were and niki is rubbing his hands against his arms when they finally reach it, teeth clattering and shivering with his whole body.
“you’re an idiot,” you say before entering the vehicle, claiming the passenger’s seat.
“i’m an idiot,” niki confirms once he’s inside the car as well, sighing in relief at the lack of the cold wind but still trying to warm himself up. “are you hungry?”
you hum and put a hand under your chin.
“are you going to cook for me again? because if so, then i don’t think i’m hungry,” you say and laugh at your own words.
niki is sure his ears are red now, he feels them burning hot, but he can’t blame you for joking like that. “but if you’re going to buy something on our way to the apartment and if you’re paying, then I am hungry.”
niki sighs for the nth time and you stifle a laugh.
“are you paying or not?” you say, reaching out to hold niki’s hand that’s frozen on the steering wheel. “do you need me to drive or something?”
“you don’t even have a driver’s license,” niki replies alarmed and turns to give you a look.
“that was a trick question to make sure you’re here with me and not somewhere in your own head,” you tell niki and squeeze his hand with a smile on your lips. the smile comforts niki who was still tense, thinking about the whole incident with regret. “i hope you’re not feeling too bad about what happened.”
“i am feeling bad but,” niki laughs and finally starts the car, turning the heating on maximum and already thinking of where he can stop by for food. “i’m also feeling scared and a little threatened. please don’t get back at me for attempting to prank you.”
you burst out laughing and niki turns to look at you, a shiver runs down his spine. you have a mischievous glint in your eyes, something is brewing in that ingenious brain of yours and all niki knows is that he’s screwed.
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buttercandy16 · 3 days ago
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In-laws
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PAIRING: Dark!Agatha Harkness x Reader, Agatha Harkness x Reader x Rio Vidal
SUMMARY: In-laws are the worst and you found out the hard way.
WARNING(s): Dark themes, Non-con, and a whole lot of SMUT!
A/N: Dark themes ahead. If you find these things disturbing I strongly advice that you skip this post. Thank you!
Y/N POV 
The night's cold breeze is crisp on my face as I stand outside the balcony thinking about how perfect my wedding tomorrow will be. 
Nicky and I have been together since my parents started working for his parents. At first, I was reluctant to engage in a romantic relationship with him since in the eyes of society we were unfit for each other, but he was persistent and in the end, I let love win. I was even more thankful that his parents accepted me and my family with open arms despite our lowly status in life. 
After years of being together, we are finally making it official tomorrow as husband and wife. 
I just finished celebrating my bachelorette party earlier which was neatly organized by one of my soon-to-be mother-in-law, Agatha. While Nicky is having his bachelor's party with his set of friends. 
Everything will be perfect, for sure nothing will go wrong. 
"Excited?" I was pulled out from my thoughts when Agatha appeared by my side with a bottle of wine in hand. 
For the record, I'm currently staying at Nicky's house. Both of his mothers insisted that I stay here before the wedding and I agreed.
"Yeah, I'm so excited to get married to Nicky!" I exclaimed excitedly. 
Agatha gave me a chuckle before waving the wine bottle in front of my face. 
"Good, then we better celebrate with this." 
"Ummm... I don't want to be rude, but I'll have to decline. I don't drink alcohol, remember?"
Agatha rolled her eyes at me before she leaned in closer to my ear. 
"Oh come on, sweetheart. That was different, this one we get to enjoy all to ourselves, and I think it's about time you try right? And it's not like we're gonna get wasted, you'll be fine tomorrow. I swear." 
I suppose... 
"O--okay then, but I'll only drink one glass.”
"One glass is enough" Agatha smiled at me mischievously before slightly pushing me inside the room. 
I was a bit nervous about how she was acting, she seemed pushy. But I was fast to dismiss that thought as she filled our glasses with wine. 
She gave me mine before sitting next to me on the sofa, only an arm's length away from each other. 
"Go on" she urged playfully... 
I swirled the wine in my glass slightly before carefully putting it to my lips and tentatively sipping the liquid. I found it delicious and very cooling.
“This is delicious!" 
"Yes, simple but very soothing. Finest wine you can ever have. But, you must drink deeply for the full effect." 
I eagerly did as I was told, and Agatha seemed satisfied with this. Soon I was holding an empty glass. I had drained it and hadn't even noticed. The drink was that smooth. The only problem is that I found that I was still thirsty. 
"Could I have another, please?" I asked, her eyes glinted with something dark from my request. 
"I think that can be arranged." 
Agatha was careful to replenish my glass whenever it emptied as we talked and talked into the night. 
It was quite odd, no matter how much I drink I still feel thirsty. 
I wondered if it was starting to affect me. I noticed that the room was becoming increasingly warm. Worse, I was finding my body becoming uncomfortably warm. My face was becoming flush. My heart was beating very fast and I was practically panting, my breath had gotten so fast. I was starting to sweat inside my clothes, too. My clothes were becoming very confining. How odd, I thought. It was supposed to be a chilly evening. But now, I desire nothing more than to get out of my clothes, then I would feel so much better. 
"Have you and Nicholas done it yet?" Her question almost made me choke on my drink, her eyes never leaving mine. 
Am I hearing this right? Does she mean th--- 
She slowly traced the rim of her wineglass while looking at me curiously, "What do you mean?" I asked.
"Did you have sex yet?" 
Her question slightly took me aback but answered, nonetheless. 
"N--no, we haven't. I'm still pure" 
The moment I said pure, a shadow seems to pass on her features as the corner of her lips slightly lifted sinisterly, barely noticeable in the dark. 
But I saw it... 
She snickered under her breath as she slightly swirled the wine in her glass. 
That's when I realized that she's never touched it. Not even a single drop. 
She followed my gaze to her wine glass before catching mine. Slightly tilting her head, she then smiled knowingly. 
She knows that I've noticed. 
I was starting to feel uncomfortable from this so I decided that it was time to retire for the night. But when I stood up, I was immediately met by sudden dizziness making me sit back on the couch ungracefully. 
It felt like my innards were being replaced by some kind of emptiness. I tried to stand again, desperate to leave this room. I swayed for just a moment before Agatha caught me. There was nothing I could do now, and as I slowly slumped sideways, she gently tugged on my shoulder, causing me to lie flat, with my head on her lap. Now all I could see was my fiance's mother smiling down at me… and the world went black. 
_=_=_ 
How long I was out, I’m not sure. I opened my eyes, and it took them a moment to adjust to the light.
Something was wrong. 
My arms could not move, despite my best efforts, and the air felt rather cold on my skin. And when my eyes adjusted, I immediately saw why. My wrists had been secured firmly in two straps, on either side of my head. And the cool air on my skin was because I'm completely naked! 
I tried to scream my lungs out, to shout for help, to do anything that might get me out of this situation. But the only thing that came out was a muffled sound. That has something to do with the gag placed over my mouth. But it did draw some attention to me because a figure suddenly appeared over my vulnerable form, and when it spoke, I heard the unmistakable voice of my fiance's mother. 
"So, you're finally awake" 
"I think before you try going off on one, I should probably introduce you to a bit of "context," I think you'd call it." She reached for the table next to her and picked up a remote. She turned on the TV that was positioned just above the bed I was strapped to. "Let's just say you might want to forget about struggling when I show you this video." 
My confusion made me forget my anger, for a moment. But as the film started, and what I was watching became clear to me, my anger was replaced by shock and horror. 
It was a video of me and my co-worker Tony, sitting in my office, and him kissing me. It had been a professional meet-up, he was showing me some files that we needed to sort out before the big presentation when out of the blue he just kissed me. I froze out of shock while his lips continued to press against mine but when I finally snapped out of it I immediately pushed him off me and gave him an ear-deafening slap on the face. But that wasn't shown in the film. It was just the kiss, making it look like I did it deliberately. I remembered him looking at me in pity like he was sorry for what he did. I didn't tell anyone about it, not even Nicky. And now my soon-to-be mother-in-law possesses proof of it.
But how? Why was there a video? Based on the angle I know it was filmed from a hidden camera. Was it done intentionally? For what reason?! Was she behind it? 
If someone got hold of it, I wouldn't just get fired from fraternizing with a colleague. I would probably lose Nicky as well. 
And that scared me shitless... 
Agatha pressed another button, and the video switched off. She looked at my face, now starting to become tear-stained and the fear now plain for everyone to see. She smiled. 
"I think that expression is a good one for you," she remarked. "It makes you look so sweet and innocent." 
She leaned over and planted a kiss on my cheek. I tried to jerk away but couldn't. The kiss practically seared my skin like molten lava. 
"Now that no one is going to disturb us, how about we get some fun done?" 
Agatha then began to touch me, and that was when I started to squirm a little. She moved her arms around my body, rubbing it in a very erotic way. "Aww… such a nice body, pet! I can't help myself but touch myself thinking about you every day. And now, I can't help myself anymore." She put a hand on my knee and began to gently stroke my leg. 
"What should I do first with your body?" She ran her finger on my smooth skin, before taking the gag off my mouth. 
I gritted my teeth from both anger and sadness. "Why are you doing this?" 
"Didn't I already tell you? I want your body to be mine! We are going to have so much fun, pet. And if you disobey me, I think you already know what will happen right? Not to mention, I can get  both of your parents fired, tsk... that would be unfortunate" 
A single tear ran on my cheek and Agatha kissed it, licking the drop. I know that I have no other choice but to let things happen. I have so much to lose if she doesn't get what she wants. 
She moved around and brought our lips together in a violent kiss, forcing her tongue past my gritted teeth. She bit my bottom lip hard enough to earn a gasp, allowing her to move her tongue past the barrier. 
The tongue quickly found its way around my mouth and explored every inch it could. In parallel to that, her hands moved around and groped my breast. She slightly massaged them and pinched the erected nipples. It was not that the events made me horny. It was the cold that made my body like that. 
The kiss ended after a while, me being out of air while the older woman was looking crazier than before. She licked her lips another time before stripping her shirt, skirt, and underwear away. She moved and kneeled in front of my face, her warmth being right on top of my face. "Eat up!" She said in a commanding voice, but I hesitated. The woman gritted her teeth in anger and grabbed my hair. "I ordered you to eat up!" She forced my mouth to get in contact with her entrance. 
Out of reflex, I attempted to close my mouth, but then felt a pair of forces crushing my head from both sides as her legs pressed me. The pain was enough to make me gasp. She took the opportunity to tighten her grip on my hair and pressed me harder. 
"That's more like it!" She started to move her body up and down, making my juice splash on my face. "Now, get that tongue of yours to work baby" She ordered and once again tightened the grip, forcing me to obey her order. 
I had to stick my tongue forward, forced to have a taste of the older woman. It was sweet and I can't stop myself from moaning from the taste of her. She also moaned at the feeling of my tongue inside her and moved faster until she cummed in my mouth. 
Just as I was about to let go of a sigh, my left leg was lifted, Agatha’s right leg sliding under it. "It is not the end yet! I still have a lot of things I want to teach your body." She pushed her hip forward, making our center meet.
I can't help but admit that it started to feel so good. The pleasure coursing through my veins like a blast of adrenaline... 
She repeated to thrush several more times, bringing our center together and making them part, and then collide again. She started to moan once again as I did the same, her hands starting to play with my breast, enjoying every contact through my body. Until my second orgasm was ripped from me this evening, followed by the beautiful temptress who laid on top of me while catching her breath from her release. 
She looked down on me in complete amusement as I lay helplessly underneath her. 
Agatha kissed the tip of my nose before sliding her warm body over me to reach something on the nightstand. When I saw what it was, my eyes grew wide as saucers... 
Oh no... please no more 
"P--please... I can't. It's too much" 
I struggled with my bonds as I tried to pull myself away from her. 
"Shhhh... I know you can. Just give mommy one more baby. I just need to taste you." 
She settled herself in between my legs, parting them by force. 
She reached between my legs and pushed something. The buzzing vibrator held against my clit sped up a notch, causing my back to arch. "Oh!" I gasped, head falling back. "Oh, oh—" 
Agatha cupped my left breast and mouthed at it, kissing and licking. I didn't know where to look but into her eyes, our foreheads practically touching on the pillow. 
I'm not sure what possessed me at the moment but I was suddenly desperate to taste her lips. 
"Kiss me," I begged. "Please..." 
And she did. Soft and sweet, holding me to her. Tugging my lip with her teeth and stroking my back, my butt. She took hold of my legs, cupping the underside of my knees. Bringing my legs around her waist, she rocked against me, teasing my lip with her tongue. 
I parted my lips for her, tasting her, sighing... Jolting when she tugged on my nipple. "Oh, ow, owie—, please don't—" 
I cried out with pleasure. This was so nice; it felt so good. 
She smiled at me. “You’ve got the prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen, pet,” she said, reaching to touch me, pulling back the hood of my clit so she could rub me with her thumb. I shivered. “Look at this tiny clit. So fucking cute, and all mine…” 
She proceeded to slide down my body until she was face to face with my dripping warmth. 
I gasped when she started to lick me and felt my stomach twitch, surprised and excited at Agatha’s eagerness to please me. I felt her tongue trace the outline of my lower lips and shuddered. A moment later, the older woman finally slid her tongue over my clit, and that's when I felt my walls clenching in a sudden spasm, screaming in pure pleasure for the third time. Due to the intensity, I blacked out. 
_=_=_ 
A groan left my lips when I woke up in the middle of the night with a sore body. 
Slightly stretching, that's when I realized that I was no longer chained to the bed and I was all alone in the room. 
Seeing this as an opportunity to get the hell outta here I immediately grabbed my clothes that were placed on the vanity chair before frantically dressing. 
No longer caring if I was dressed right I immediately ran towards the door but stopped when it suddenly opened, revealing my fiance’s other mother, Rio Vidal dressed in her expensive suit. 
"Ri-rio..." 
"Sweethear, what are you doing here?" Rio asked as she curiously surveyed my disheveled form. 
"Rio, you have to help me, please" I pleaded as I went closer to her. 
"Why? What's wrong?" She asked as she gently held my arm. 
"It's A–agatha, she---" 
"Hello, my love! You're home early," My words were cut off as Agatha appeared from the bathroom only covered by a plush purple robe. "It seems you caught our little bunny trying to hop away." She smiled devilishly... 
Wha-what? 
"Which is quite fortunate, I wouldn't want to miss out" Rio chuckled darkly. "But I'm very disappointed that you started without me, my love." 
"Well, you were late. It's been so long since I wanted a taste of her. I lost all self-control the moment I had her in my grasp. But don't worry, I saved the best for you." 
My eyes widened in realization and I felt my whole body shiver in fear as I heard the door's lock click. Locking me inside with two predators hungry for my young flesh... 
Nonononono... this isn't happening... 
Tears started to fall from my eyes as Agatha walked over to me, and Rio’s hand settled over my shoulders in a tight and almost painful hold. 
Agatha looked down on me with a predatory grin before slowly tilting my chin with her finger to meet her eyes. 
It was so dark and full of lust that it felt like I was about to drown in it. 
"Do you know the real reason why we let our son be with someone as lowly as you? It's because the moment we saw you, we knew that we needed to have you. Our perfect little toy." My heart ached from her words. So after all this time, I was nothing but a fool. 
"So here's what will happen from now on, you will get married to my son tomorrow and officially become part of our family. You will be a good wife to him and grant him the children he desires. But behind closed doors, you will become our pretty little pet and cater to our needs. Do you understand?" I nodded weakly.
"But the most important thing is... Nicky must never know about this little arrangement of ours. This secret will stay with you until you reach your grave, or else... I'm pretty sure you are aware of the power that we hold Y/N, if you go against us, we will destroy you and your loved ones. Do I make myself clear?" Her grip on my chin tightened, emphasizing how serious she was. 
"Ye-yes" I stuttered through gritted teeth. 
Agatha's eyes moved from behind me as Rio pressed her lips to my ear as she whispered... 
"If you behave like a good little girl for us, we will reward you with anything you desire, aside from your freedom of course." 
"Since that's all settled then, I think it's time for the main event" 
"Wh-what would that be?" I fearfully asked. 
Agatha smiled at me before leaning in close, her lips almost touching mine. 
"We're going to take your virginity baby"
_=_=_
Please don't forget to like, repost, and leave a comment below. I love hearing other peoples thoughts about this. Also, if you have any good ideas for a Dark fanfic featuring mother agatha please do send it. Thanks! 💜
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justmymindandstuff · 12 hours ago
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color of the wolf - Cregan Stark x WifeReader
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summary: It's the Harvest Festival in Winterfell. And Cregan is looking forward to an evening with his wife by his side. But your attention is constantly needed elsewhere. At some point he's had enough and takes matters into his own hands.
words: 2.259
warnings: jealous and possessiv Cregan, mention of sex (briefly)
a/n: I'm a sucker for jealous Cregan // English is not my first language// No use of Y/N// AO3 //Hope you like it🧡
requests are open// main- masterlist // hotd-masterlist
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Winterfell is buzzing with activity. The final preparations for today are made. Cregan's steps lead him through his castle. The people step out of his way and respectfully lower their heads for their Lord. Cregan has finished his tasks for this afternoon and can now fully concentrate on the feast.
Today, the Harvest Festival will be celebrate down in the Winter Town. The harvest for the upcoming winter had been good. Today they would give their gratitude to the gods. He is looking forward to this . A relaxed evening with his wife and his people. You would dance, laugh and be happy together.
It is Cregan's duty as Lord of Winterfell to light the great fire. Actually, he wanted to make his way to the village already, but you weren't in your chambers. So he set out in search of his wife. Unfortunately he is unsuccessful.
His half-sister Sara comes towards him. Normally, she is your constant companion.
"Sister. Have you seen my lady wife?" he asks. Sara looks up at him confused.
"She is already in Town. She wanted to go to the orphanage and bring the children to the feast. She didn't tell you?"
Cregan's eyebrows knit together, he hopes that you at least took one of your guards with you. "No."
You threw yourself into the preparations for the feast and the hospitality of your guests, and probably just forgot to let him know that you were already on your way.
"Come on, let's go down. It's time for the Harvest Festival."
Cregan nods to Sara and offers her his arm. Together, the siblings make their way down to Winter Town. Most of the villagers have already gathered. Hot spiced wine, fresh meat, fruit, and sweets are being distributed. Music is played.
"My Lord." someone hands him a cup of wine, and he passes it to Sara before asking for a second one. Lord Karstark approaches the two of them. Sara frees her arm from his and disappears among the people to avoid a conversation with the old Lord. Unfortunately, Cregan does not have this freedom.
Cregan's gaze searches over the people. The warm spiced wine warms from within. Lord Karstark begins to speak. "The harvest was good and the Citadel predicts a mild winter."
Cregan knows very well that the Citadel is not always right. Winter is unpredictable. The only thing that is certain is that winter is coming.
But today is not the day to worry about winter. Today is a day for celebration.
"We can consider ourselves lucky," he replied. Karstark continues speaking. But then laughter pierces the air. Cregan is immediately distracted. Among thousands of laughs, he would recognize your laugh. He turns his head and sees you. You are currently leading a group of children to the festival grounds. Everyone has a joyful smile on their face. You hold one of the little ones by the hand while another child sits on your hip.
Cregan can't take his eyes off you. He is the happiest man in the world because you are his. At the sight of you, his heart opens up, and he can hardly wait until you carry your own child on your hip. But something seems odd to him. He can't put his finger on it, but a slight burning sensation is forming in his stomach.
He watches you as your gaze sweeps across the people, and when you meet his eyes, a radiant smile appears on your lips. Automatically, his feet move in your direction. He is drawn to you like a moth to a flame. But he only takes a few steps before he gets stopped again.
"My Lord Stark, it is time," the Maester snaps him out of his thoughts Cregan looks at him and nods. Tries to hide his annoyance that he can't get to you. He wants you by his side. Cregan is handed a torch and he ignites the neatly arranged wood. Immediately, the flames shoot up into the air.
The villagers clap, the children laugh.
Cregan straightens his shoulders and begins to speak in a loud voice. "The gods are good. The harvest was more successful than it has been in years. Today we celebrate and thank the gods."
The attendees clap and cheer.
"Let us raise our cups and let the wine flow." he raises his cup and everyone else follows his example.
Cregan takes a step back. He has never been a man of many words. He has always found this attention uncomfortable. The flames warm from the outside while the spiced wine warms from the inside. The music starts up again, and the people of Winterfell fall into a joyful bustle of conversation and dance. Cregan starts moving again to come to you. Everything pulls him towards you.
The flames give your skin a warm glow. Your hair is braided back in a typical northern style. You are wearing an elaborate dress. The hem is embroidered with red weirwood leaves that wander over your skirt and end in your corset in the seal of your father's house. You are so beautiful that he can hardly believe you belong to him.
And now Cregan also realizes what had been bothering him. You are wearing the wrong color. Instead of wearing the usual dark gray/white, you are wearing the color of your family's house. At this realization, Cregan notices his jaw tightening slightly. You are already approaching him, but then you are called by a Silentsister, the head of the orphanage.
"Lady Stark. Do you have a moment?" she asks. You smile apologetically at Cregan and then turn to the older woman.
Cregan suppresses a sigh. He knows that the children and the orphanage in the village are important to you. Every winter, children lose their parents to the winter, and even though Cregan does everything in his power to prevent it, he cannot defeat the winter.
Since you came to Winterfell you have made it your mission to take care of the orphans. So he lets you go.
His plan to wait until you finish your conversation doesn't work out, because of course both his Lords and his Subjects take the opportunity to speak with him more casually than during the petitions.
He is being pulled from conversation to conversation. He tries to meet everyone with kindness and listen to their concerns. Or just to talk about unimportant things.
Only when you clap your hands to get everyone's attention does Cregan notice that the sun has already set. You step forward and Cregan is once again overwhelmed by your beauty for a moment. He would never get used to how much love he has in his heart for you.
The celebration falls silent and all attention is on you. "The children of the orphanage have prepared something for today. We hope you like it." you say, nodding encouragingly at the children. A small group of older children steps forward and start a play about the Children of the Forest.
Cregan is glad that the play frees him from a tiresome conversation with his stablemaster. He turns his gaze away from the children and looks at you. You stand there with a proud look and watch as the children happily perform their play. When it is over, everyone claps. The children bow and run back to you. Immediately, you are surrounded by the children. He hears how you praise them with a gentle voice.
As the children slowly start to disperse again, Cregan tries again to finally reach you. But once again, he is stopped. This time by Lady Cerwyn. Cregan would like to scream.
When he finally manages to detach himself from the talkative Lady without appearing rude, he vowes not to let himself be held back any longer from yoi .
He wants to talk to you for at least five minutes. To see your smile, hear your warm voice, and perhaps steal a few kisses from your soft lips.
Immediately, his gaze searches through the crowd. And when he finally sees you again, a hot jealousy immediately rise inside his veins.
You are currently dancing with Lord Rogar Bolton. A young lord who inherited Dreadfort only a few moons ago.
The sight of him leading you with practiced dance steps, his hand a little too low on your back for Cregans liking, drives him almost mad. And when you lean your head back and start to laugh joyfully Cregan sees red.
You and Lord Bolton look like a happy, loving couple. And the fact that you are wearing your father's colors makes it even worse. At that moment, nothing indicate that you are Lady Stark, that you are his wife.
"My Lord..." he hears the voice of the Maester beside him, but he can't engage in another pointless conversation right now. Without paying attention to the Maester, he sets off. His steps are heavy and he simply strides through the dancing people to reach you. When he finally reaches you, he simply grabs your waist and pulls you out of Lord Bolton's arms.
Startled by the interruption, you flinch, but as soon as you recognize him, your radiant smile reappears. "I'll take over from here. Thank you, Lord Bolton." he towers over the young man with his broad stature and he knows that his eyes are sparkling with anger. But he wants it like that. He wants to scare this man away. His grip on your waist tightens.
"My Lord," stammers Rogar and quickly turns away.
Cregan turns around and takes your hand while his other hand stays on your hip. He begins to move both of you to the music.
"There you are." you begin to smile happily. "I have the feeling I haven't seen you all day."
"Didn't look like it bothered you much." he can't help that his voice sounds annoyed. You furrow your eyebrows and look up at him.
"What?"
"You had a good chat with Bolton." Cregan grumbles. Your expression relaxes and you smile slightly again. You lift your hand and gently caress his cheek. Cregan closes his eyes for a moment and enjoys the touch.
"Are you jealous Love?" you ask, slightly amused. Cregan lets out a snort.
"Of course not," he lies. But the burning feeling inside him still hasn't completely disappeared. You raise an eyebrow and he concedes. "Maybe a little," he murmurs. "Why are you wearing this dress?"
For a brief moment sadness glimmers in your eyes, and at the sight, Cregan's heart tightens.
"You don´t like my dress?" you suddenly ask uncertainly.
"If I'm being honest, no. It has the wrong color wife."
Relief is reflected on your face. You wear your emotions on your face, and Cregan is glad about it.
"It's the color of my house," you say again now with a smile on your lips.
Cregan shakes his head slightly and pulls you closer to him by your hips. You place your hand on his broad chest. "The colors of your house are gray and white. You are Lady Stark. My wife." his voice is deep and he notices how you shiver in his arms. Your cheeks turn slightly red as you shyly lower your eyes. The jealousy slowly begins to fade and is replaced with something else.
"I am still your wife even when I don't wear your colors," you say then.
"Right, but then no one can see it."
You giggle softly and then look him in the eyes again. "Then we'll just have to show them differently."
You lean up, and in the next moment, your lips crash onto his and your hand buries itself in his dark hair. Cregan is surprised for a second by the intensity of your kiss. His heart begins to race. He pulls you a little closer to him as his tongue glides into your mouth. You moan softly against his lips, and Cregan would love to drag you back to the keep right away. You move your lips against his. Fits perfectly in his arms. Warmth floods through Cregan as he conquers your mouth.
You break apart breathlessly and Cregan sees over your shoulder how Lord Bolton turns away with an annoyed look. Triumph rises within him, and he cannot prevent a slight smile. You are his. Completely and utterly, and everyone should see that.
"Was that proof enough that I only love you?" you ask with a smile.
"I have never doubted your love. I just want everyone else to know that too."
You roll your eyes in laughter and intertwine your fingers with his. "Everyone knows it, Love. Believe me." you give him a quick kiss on the lips. Cregan's lips curl into a smile as he looks at his beautiful, loving wife.
"Lord Stark" someone calls out and Cregan grumbles in annoyance. He had indeed gotten five minutes with you, but of course that's not enough.
You give him a reproachful look before turning to the voice with a smile and pulling him along with you. The rest of the evening you don't leave his side for a second. Your hands are intertwined or he has his hand around your waist. Again and again, he steals a kiss from your lips or enjoys the feeling of your hand on his arm as you gently caress him.
That night, he makes sure you never wear the wrong color again as he tears your dress from your body before you unite in a passionate embrace between the sheets and furs of his bed
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jpmarvel90 · 2 days ago
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Dont Belong Part 3
Masterlist Natasha Masterlist
Part 1 Part 2
Word Count: 7175
Relationship: Mother WandaNat x Daugher Reader
Summary: Y/n's infection is hitting her hard and she's still struggling with her feelings on her parents. Thankfully, Yelena is there to help cheer her up and she brings along a surprise that might just make everything feel better!
Nat: Mama Wanda: Mom
Y/n POV:
These last two days in the hospital have blurred together, a monotonous cycle of dull light and beeping machines. The weight of my infection drags on me, leaving me shivering one moment and sweating the next. I've spent far too much time staring at the ceiling, feeling trapped in this sterile room, yearning for the freedom of my life before the mission went sideways. The boredom is suffocating, and I feel like I'm losing pieces of myself with every passing hour.
I feel a constant gaze from my parents who rarely leave my side. It's strange to go from having them ignore you to being around all the time. Part of me feels like things were like they used to be when I was a full part of their family. The other part of me is screaming saying they don't mean it and will soon be gone again.
But today feels different, a whisper of hope fluttering in the air. I've been waiting for this moment, and when a familiar knock sounds at the door, my heart races with anticipation. "Can I come in?" Yelena's voice calls softly, and I can't suppress the grin that spreads across my face at the sound of her.
"Of course!" I call back, the eagerness spilling over in my tone. I sit up a little straighter, my heart pounding as I manage to prop myself up, using the button on the side of the bed to elevate myself.
The door swings open, and Yelena steps in, her expression a mix of relief and worry. Her golden hair catches the light, and I can see the telltale signs of sleepless nights etched under her eyes. "Y/n!" she breathes, rushing to my side, her voice trembling slightly as she takes my hand.
"Yelena! I'm so glad to see you." The words come out a little breathless, and I can't help the surge of emotion that washes over me. Just seeing her makes the room feel a little less confining, a little brighter.
"I can't believe you're awake," she says, her grip tightening around my fingers. "I was so scared. We all were. You had everyone worried sick." Her eyes shimmer with unshed tears, and for a moment, it feels like the weight of my situation lifts just a bit. I don't think I've ever seen Yelena emotional like this before and it helps me realise how bad this whole situation is. She would never allow anyone to see her this vulnerable except for Mama.
"Hey, I'm okay. Well, sort of." I gesture weakly to the IV drip, the hospital bed, and the machines that surround me. "Just a little out of commission at the moment."
Yelena's smile is tentative but bright, yet it's overshadowed by the concern etched on her face. "I just hate seeing you hurt like this. You're my niece and I thought I would always be here to protect you." She shares honestly.
I give her hand a squeeze and share a warm smile when she finally looks up to me. "I can't be protected forever. Besides, I need you now. This recovery is going to be shit and I need you to help me when it gets too much." I reassure her and she nods. "I'm not going anywhere. I'm here to help you through it all. Stark has even set me up on the same floor as you. So, I'll be there whenever you need me." She explains, making my heart warm with the thought of seeing her for a while to come.
"What about the widows?" I ask, knowing how much that means to her. "I've already been able to help so many. Now I need to help you. The others can wait. Besides, Kate can do the research on where we need to go next." She replies. "Who's Kate?" I ask, surprised to hear that she is working with someone else.
"Just a stray that Clint found. She's annoying, but oddly fun to be around. I think you'd like her. I'm sure she'll be around at some point to say hi." She explains with a shrug.
As the initial shock of seeing me seems to fade, I can see the corners of Yelena's mouth twitching upward, her eyes sparkling with mischief. It's as if she's flipping a switch, her demeanour transforming from worried auntie to the playful, teasing friend I know and love.
"You know," she starts, leaning back slightly and crossing her arms, "for someone who just woke up from a dramatic hospital nap, you look surprisingly like a zombie. I mean, I thought they had strict rules against bringing the undead into the hospital."
I let out a soft laugh, despite the ache in my chest. "Yeah, well, the food here isn't exactly helping my cause. I'm pretty sure I could survive off of those tasteless mushy meals for a week and still look better than this."
Yelena raises an eyebrow, clearly entertained. "Mushy meals? I'd expect you to be on some gourmet diet, considering all the special treatments they give you. I'm starting to think you should at least get some ice cream as a post-surgery reward." She chuckles. "Now that's the kind of thinking I can get behind. Have a word with Tony yeah?" I reply, feeling my spirits lift. "Ice cream sounds amazing. But what are the odds of that happening here?"
"Zero. But I'm prepared for this. I'll break you out of this place and take you for ice cream. You just need to give me the signal, and I'll burst in through the window like a stealthy ninja." She mimics a dramatic leap and landing in mama's pose. "See, I'll even do my best poser impersonation!" She playfully teases and she now starts to pretend to scale the invisible walls of my hospital room, her expression shifting to one of exaggerated seriousness. "You can count on me, Y/n. Ice cream shall be yours!"
I chuckle, the image of Yelena performing an acrobatic escape making the heaviness of the past days lift a little more. "What flavour are we talking here? I hope it's not vanilla. I have standards, you know."
"Vanilla? Please! I was thinking more along the lines of double chocolate fudge with extra sprinkles. And maybe a side of cherry sauce because why not go big, right?" She shares her thoughts whilst taking the seat next to me again. Her hand resting over mine. "Now you're speaking my language," I respond, shaking my head in mock seriousness. "If I'm risking a hospital breakout, it better be worth it." I laugh.
Yelena sits back in her seat, her chest still rising and falling as she laughs at her own hilariousness. She then looks back up at me. "But seriously, let's plan this for when you're feeling better. I'm not above a hospital escape." Her grin is contagious, and I can feel the tension in my shoulders easing. "Deal. Just don't forget the sprinkles."
As our laughter fills the room, I realize how much I've missed this lightness, this camaraderie. It's comforting to think about having Yelena by my side as I navigate the uncertainty of recovery and family dynamics.
But beneath the playful banter, there's an unspoken understanding between us, a bond that allows me to express my fears without words. With Yelena around, I feel like I can face whatever comes next, armed with humour and the knowledge that I'm not alone in this fight.
"Just promise me one thing," I say, my voice turning more serious again. "Anything," she replies, her gaze earnest. "Don't let me give up on the ice cream party, okay? No matter what happens."
"Never! I'll be your ice cream guardian," she declares, puffing out her chest with mock pride. "We will have that party, and it will be legendary. I will personally ensure that you have the sprinkles of life!"
With that promise hanging in the air, I know I can count on her not just for ice cream but for so much more as I navigate this complicated recovery. Even amidst the challenges, I feel a renewed sense of strength.
Though the playful atmosphere soon disappears as Yelena looks at me with a hurt look. "You know," Yelena begins cautiously, glancing around the room as if making sure no one else can hear, "I've been really worried about you. Seeing you like this. It's been hard. I didn't expect to walk in and see my Y/n looking so weak."
"Yeah, well, welcome to the aftermath of a bullet wound," I respond, a hint of sarcasm lacing my tone, but her expression remains sombre. "I mean it, Y/n," she says, her voice low. "I can handle all sorts of dangerous missions, but this... this was different. You're my niece. I've seen too many people get hurt, and it scares me to think about what could have happened if things went even more wrong."
"I know. I didn't want to worry you, but... it's not like I planned to get shot," I reply, my voice softening. "I was trying to do my best, and it went sideways."
"It's not your fault," Yelena reassures me, squeezing my hand gently. "But promise me you'll be careful. Don't rush back into missions. I can't go through this again. I thought I lost you."
"I'm not going anywhere yet. You've got me for a while longer," I say with a playful lilt, trying to lighten the atmosphere. Her smile falters, but she doesn't let go of my hand. "You have to promise me you won't get hurt again. I mean it. You don't have to be the hero all the time, you know." The gravity of her words sinks in, and I can feel a lump forming in my throat. "I thought I was doing well. I thought it was my chance to prove myself," I admit, my voice quieter now. "Prove yourself? You don't need to do that. You're already a part of this family," she insists, her voice firm but gentle.
But I can't shake the feeling of inadequacy, the bitter sting of doubt that lingers in the corners of my mind. "I don't feel like it," I confess, looking down at our hands intertwined. "Not after everything that's happened. My parents... I don't know. It's complicated." I begin tentatively, not sure how to express the turmoil inside me.
"They've hurt me for so long, and I'm still trying to wrap my head around why they suddenly seem to care. It feels like. I don't know, like they're trying to make up for lost time. They've been... around. Too around, if you know what I mean. They've been acting all concerned, but it feels more like an obligation."
I've felt torn about this since I've woke up. They're around all the time and trying to do everything that can to help me. But all I can think about is how much they have hurt me and if they would ever be able to make up for their past actions.
Yelena nods, her expression serious. "It's okay to be conflicted. They've done wrong by you, and you have every right to be angry. But if they're genuinely trying to change, maybe there's a chance for you to heal too." She suggests, similar to how Steve has these last two days.
"I don't want to forgive them just because they're here now. It feels disingenuous," I admit, frustration seeping into my voice. "I've been raised to believe that actions speak louder than words, and I need to see real change." I state irritated. "Then hold them to that standard," she urges, her voice steady. "Don't let them slide by just because they're your parents. You deserve more than that." She iterates.
"I guess I'm just afraid of being disappointed again," I whisper, feeling a shiver of vulnerability wash over me. It hurt so much when I slowly seemed to disappear from their lives. I don't think I could experience that again. "What if they go back to ignoring me once I'm healed? What's the point of this?" I share, tears stinging my eyes.
Yelena leans closer, her brow furrowing as she studies my face. "That's not fair to you. They hurt you, and it's okay to be angry about that. But you deserve to feel loved and cared for. You're so much stronger than you give yourself credit for." "Stronger?" I scoff lightly, but inside I feel a flicker of hope. "I barely survived my first mission and ended up in a hospital bed. That doesn't feel strong."
"Strength isn't just about fighting, Y/n. It's about surviving, too. You survived, and you're still here. You're still fighting." Her voice softens, and I can see her eyes glistening with tears. I nod slowly, her words resonating with me. "You're right. I just don't want to get hurt like that again. I thought joining SHIELD would mean I'd finally be seen, but now... it feels like a mess."
Yelena shakes her head, frustration evident in her expression. "No. You're not a mess. You're human. They need to step up and show you that you matter, but that doesn't mean you have to accept their love without question. You get to set the boundaries. You get to decide what you want from them moving forward. But I do believe that you have to give them a chance to show you that they've changed." She shares, taking me by surprise.
"It was years Yelena. How can I move to just forgive them for everything that's happened? Just because they're here for my recovery, doesn't mean it makes up for everything that they've done." I raise my voice getting frustrated that no one seems to understand the depth of how much this has affected me.
She thinks for a moment before speaking up. "I know I can't understand the pain they caused you. When I heard about what they did to you, I was ready to kick both of their asses. But I've seen this determination in them. Especially Nat. I just don't want you to let the anger eat you alive. You deserve more than that. You deserve to heal, not just physically, but emotionally, too." Her words resonate deep within me. I can feel the weight of my resentment pressing against my chest, threatening to suffocate me. "It's just hard, Yelena. I don't know if I can trust them again. What if they just go back to how things were?"
"That's the risk, but it's also a chance for something better. Maybe this could be the start of a new chapter for you all," she replies, her voice filled with hope. "I mean, how many people get a second chance to rewrite their story? You can make it count." She tries to reason with me. "Or I could just end up disappointed again," I say, my voice barely above a whisper.
"Hey, no one said life was easy," she counters, leaning forward, her tone shifting to a playful challenge. "You've faced worse. You survived a bullet wound, for Christ's sake! How about you take that strength and channel it into something more positive? Like confronting your parents." She suggests. "Confront them?" I echo, feeling a knot of anxiety tighten in my stomach.
"Yeah! You're a badass. You fought off those Hydra agents; you can fight for your own happiness." she encourages. "Don't let anyone else dictate your worth. Not your parents, not Hydra. No one."
"I'll think about it," I concede, knowing that deep down, she's right. Maybe facing my parents isn't just about them; it's about taking control of my own narrative, my own healing. "Good," Yelena replies, her smile brightening the room once more. "And remember, no matter what you decide, I'll be right here, cheering you on. We're in this together, ice cream and all."
As I gaze into her determined eyes, I feel the flicker of hope igniting within me. Yelena is right. I can't let the past dictate my future. Perhaps I can find a way to reclaim my voice, my choices. And with her by my side, I feel like I can face whatever comes next.
__________
The soft hum of the machines is a constant companion, a backdrop to the quiet conversation happening in the room. Mama and mom sit nearby, each offering their own version of silent support. Mama, with her usual calm demeanour, sits crossed legged in the chair near the foot of my bed. Her posture is relaxed, but her sharp eyes betray her constant vigilance. She notices everything, always has, and I can feel her observing me like she's looking for something beneath the surface. Mom on the other hand, has stationed herself at my side, like aways. She's less fussy, thankfully, but still has to be close, like I'm going to disappear if she's not.
Sometimes, I find the silence unbearable compared to their constant and sometimes suffocating fussing over me. I feel on edge, like they're waiting for me to talk to them. I think back to what Yelena said about confronting them and doing it on my terms. But I want to do it in the right frame of mind, and at the moment, this infection is still kicking my ass.
Mama breaks the silence as her well trained eyes watch me for a while. "How are you feeling Y/n?" She asks, her eyes narrowing slightly as she studies me, as though she's trying to catch me out if I say the wrong thing. "A bit better." I respond with a slight nod, my words carefully measured. I don't want to give too much away. Not about how I'm feeling and especially not about the swirl of doubt that's been growing inside of me since the incident.
"Are you sure? You're sweating." She points out, sitting up. Mom goes to reach for my forehead, but quickly retreats her hand. She's been trying really hard not to be too much and I'm grateful for that. I should have known that she could see straight through me and notice the discomfort I'm in. "Just a little." I admit. "Is there anything we can do? Would you like some water? Or we could change the quilt for a blanket if that would help?" Mom suggests.
I think for a moment before giving in, knowing that I am burning up a little too quickly. "The blanket would be better if that's ok." I respond, earning a warm smile from mom as she stands and moves to grab the blanket as mama takes the quilt and folds it up. "Better?" Mom asks as the thin blanket now rests over my legs. "Yes. Thank you." I quietly respond.
"You're being strong, but you don't have to be." Mom says, her voice soft but persuasive. Her green eyes watching me too closely. "We're here for you." She states. Something I've heard more these last few days than I have in my whole like.
I offer a tight smile. "I appreciate that." I reply, but there's something hollow in my words, something they both notice. I see it in the flicker of mama's eyes, in the slight frown mom tries to hide. They want me to let them in, to trust them. But I can't. No right now.
The knock on the door interrupts the thick atmosphere. As we all look to the door, a smile grows on my face as Yelena pushes open the door, bursting in to the room with her usual energy. Her blonde hair bounces around her shoulders as she strides in, a smirk on her lips. She's a welcome distraction from the unspoken suspicions swirling in my mind.
Behind her, there's someone new. A brunette with wide eyes and a slightly awkward smile follows in her wake, holding a small bouquet of flowers in her hands. It's clear she doesn't quite know what to do with them as she shifts nervously, standing next to Yelena like she's trying to figure out how to fit in. "This is Kate." Yelena says with a grin, motioning to the brunette with a flourish. "Oh, right. The annoying stray Clint picked up." I reply with a grin, my eyes flicking between Yelena and the new girl. I feel a small flutter of nerves in my chest, but I push it aside, trying to appear casual.
Kate gasps dramatically, placing her hand over her chest as if wounded. "Annoying stray? Really? Is that how Yelena described me?" She shoots Yelena a mocking glare, then turns to me with a playful twinkle in her eyes. "Don't listen to her. I'm delightful, I promise." She smirks.
There is something instantly disarming about her. Her smile is infectious, and I find myself grinning back before I can stop myself. "I'll be the judge of that." I say, raising an eyebrow in challenge. Kate's laugh is light. "Well, I guess I better make a good impression then huh. I'm Kate. Nice to finally meet you."
As if she suddenly becomes aware of the other two people in the room, Kate suddenly becomes a lot more nervous as she steps forward, holding out the flowers a little awkwardly. "I, uh, thought some flowers might brighten up the place." She says her voice light but tinged with nervousness. "If you don't like them, I can... I don't know, take them back or something."
I can't help but smile at the sudden awkwardness, feeling some of the tension ease from my shoulders. There's something captivating about her, a clumsy sincerity that feels genuine. Like she's not trying to be anything other than who she is. If's refreshing, in contrast to the more guarded and calculated vibes in the room.
"No, no. They're nice. I love them." I say, accepting the flowers with a smile. "Thank you." I say gratefully. Mom steps in to help, taking the flowers from Kate and placing them on the beside table. She flashes Kate a smile, but I can't help but notice the way her eyes flick between me and Kate, like she's sizing up the interaction. Her protective nature is sweet, but right now it feels like an intrusion, like she's watching too closely.
Yelena of course, can't let the moment go without making it awkward. "Oh great. The two of you are already making goo-goo eyes at each other." She says with a snort, dropping herself into a chair next to mama with a dramatic sigh. "I should have seen this coming." She says to her sister. "Goo-goo eyes?" I sputter, my cheeks burning. "Yelena, we literally just met." Kate for her part, looks just as flustered, running a hand through her hair as she laughs awkwardly. "Yeah wow, not even five minutes in and I'm already being roasted. Thanks Yelena." Yelena has a mischievous grin as she gives Kate a thumbs up. "Hey, I call it like I see it." She shrugs.
I glance at Kate again, and despite the teasing, there's something about her that puts me at ease. Something feels unguarded in a way that I haven't felt around my parents lately. She seems real, no hidden motives, no unreadable layers. Just Kate, awkward and charming in her own way.
Mama raises an eyebrow at Yelena's comment but stays quiet, observing as always. Mom though let's out a soft chuckle, her eyes softening for a moment as she looks between Kate and me. "I think it's sweet." She says, but there's an undercurrent to her words. A subtle probing as if she's gauging how close I'm willing to let this new person get.
I shift uncomfortably in my bed, trying to shake off the unease. "Kate seems nice." I say, trying to keep things light. "But you don't need to start planning a wedding already." I joke, earning a loud laugh from Kate.
Yelena leans back in her chair, a satisfied smirk on her face. "Well, you're already doing better than most people who meet Y/n. She doesn't usually warm up to strangers this fast."
"Yelena." I mutter, shooting her a look, but the playful banter is enough to make me feel a bit more like myself again. Even if the tension with my parents still lingers beneath the surface.
Mama exchanges a glance with mom, and I can feel the weight of their unspoken thoughts. They're both protective, maybe even a little suspicious of the new dynamic. I know they're trying to look out for me, but their watchful eyes feel too heavy right now and to be honest, they don't have the right to have any thoughts on this right now. They've barely been my parents for the last couple of years. They don't suddenly have a say in who I'm friends with.
"Well, at least you brought someone who isn't here to lecture me about being shot." I tease, giving Yelena a pointed look. Kate grins clearly relieved the conversation has shifted. "I'm just here for the heist planning." She smiles, her tone light. "Whatever Yelena has you roped into, I'm in." I join in the joke. Yelena perks up at that. "Oh, you have no idea what you've signed up for Bishop. This one here," she jerks her thumb at me, "has a history with getting into trouble."
Kate moves to take the seat next to me as both my parents decide to give us some space and grab some lunch. I'm grateful for them being able to read the room, but I notice the observant and narrow gaze of mama as she passes by Kate. I'm pretty sure I see Kate gulp a little which makes me laugh lightly.
"So," Kate asks, crossing her arms. "what's the plan for today? Ice cream, hospital jailbreak or maybe both?" She smiles, making the butterflies in my stomach flutter. "Oh, Yelena's already promised me ice cream, but she keeps postponing the jailbreak." I tease, glancing over at Yelena who's pretending not to listen.
Kate lets out a dramatic sigh, shaking her head. "Typical. She makes all these grand promises, and then when it comes time to actually execute..." Kate starts teasingly before Yelena speaks up. "I'm literally right here." She complains, throwing her hands up in mock exasperation. "And for the record. I would have busted you out, but your mother threatened to remove all the mac and cheese from the building if I did." She admits with a child like huff.
"Still scared of mama huh?" I smirk, earning a harsh stare from my aunt. "No!" She defends loudly. "Well, maybe when it comes down to you." She admits quietly, making Kate and I laugh. "Well, well. I've finally discovered the one thing Yelena Belova is scared of." Kate torments Yelena. "Yeah, well don't forget that you're the one scared of me." Yelena points out giving her fiercest glare. Something that makes Kate shrink back into her seat. "Yep. You're right. Sorry." She apologises goofily, making me smile even wider.
There's a beat of silence, but it's not awkward. It's easy, comfortable, and I'm surprised at how quickly I've warmed up to Kate. She's sharp, funny and there's a confidence about her that makes me feel more at ease. I can tell she's someone who doesn't take life too seriously, but there's a genuine warmth underneath the sarcasm.
Yelena is watching us again, her arms crossed, and her eyebrow arched like she's trying to figure out how this is going to play out. "You know, I might actually enjoy watching this." She says, her voice laced with amusement. "You two are way too cute. It's like watching a rom-com in real time." She smirks
"Okay, enough of that." I say quickly, feeling my face begin to flush, this time not due to my infection! I glance to Kate who is grinning like she's in on some joke that I'm not, and I can't help but laugh. "Yelena, don't you have some Widow business to attend to?" I question hopefully. "Nope." She says cheerfully, popping the 'p' for emphasis. "I'm on babysitting duty today." She smiles proudly whilst I just roll my eyes. Maybe I do want my parents back right now!
Kate leans closer to me, lowering her voice conspiratorially. "Does she always talk like that, or is it just for us?" She questions. "Always." I whisper back, earning a glare from Yelena. "Alright, alright." Yelena says, pretending to be offended, but her eyes twinkle with amusement. "I can see when I'm not wanted. I'll give you two some space. Try not to flirt too much while I'm gone." She teases.
"And you," she stops in front of Kate, a stern look on her face. "If she so much as flinches you call the nurse. I will have your head if anything happens to her." She warns her lowly. Kate just nods, gulping at the threat. "P-promise." She stutters. "Good. Text me if you need anything. Now have fun being all awkward and flirty." She smirks as she saunters out of the room.
Suddenly, it's just the two of us, the room quieter but still filled with that easy, playful energy. I glance over at Kate, feeling a bit of awkwardness settle in. But it's the good kind that makes my heart race a little.
"So, what now?" I ask, trying to sound casual? Kate shrugs, a teasing smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "I don't know. I mean, we could plot that jailbreak. Or maybe..." She pauses, her eyes meeting mine. "We could just hang out and get to know each other a little better." She suggests.
There's a warmth in her gaze, something that makes my heart flutter, and for the first time in a while, I feel a sense of excitement. Not just for the ice cream or the jokes, but the possibility of something new. Something good. And maybe, just maybe, I'm ready for it.
Nat's POV:
My sharp eyes have always picked up on the subtle shift in a person's demeanour, the tiniest details that others overlook. Right now, I'm studying Kate Bishop. She's awkward sure. A little too wide-eyed and jittery, holding onto those flowers like she's afraid they might combust. There's a clumsy sincerity to her that I can't decide if I trust yet. Y/n though... Y/n is smiling. Laughing even, and I haven't seen that kind of lightness in her face in far too long. Still, I remain cautious.
I watch as Y/n teases Kate, the easy flow of their banter rolling off Y/n's tongue without the weight that usually accompanies her words. It's almost as if she's forgotten, if only for a few minutes, about the turmoil she's been going through. And while I want that for her, there's a part of me that can't let go of my protective instincts. That part that wants to dig deeper into who Kate Bishop really is, figure out if she's worthy of my daughter's trust.
Because Y/n doesn't let people in easily. Wanda and I have made that even harder for her now. To be able to trust is a difficult thing. I don't want to see her hurt more than she currently is. Not after everything that I've caused.
Wanda's voice pulls me out of my thoughts as she steps up beside me, her arms crossed but her expression soft, watching the interaction with a gentler gaze than I have. "She looks happy." Wanda murmurs. Her voice has that quiet thoughtful tone that always means she's been observing the situation for longer than I realised.
I nod, though I don't take my eyes off of Y/n. "She does." I admit reluctantly. Wanda notices this and quickly makes up an excuse of going to get some lunch and we quickly exit the room. Probably much to Y/n's delight!
"You don't like it?" Wanda asks, her lips twitching into a small smile. She can read me too easily, knows exactly what I'm feeling even when I try to keep it to myself. We hover in the corridor outside of Y/n's room as I sigh. "I didn't say that." I glance towards my wife, raising an eyebrow.
"No, but I know you." She chuckles softly, and it's a warm, comforting sound that cuts through the tension I've been holding in my chest. "Nat, you don't trust her yet." It's not a question, and I don't answer right away. Instead, I look back through the window into Y/n's room. My eyes falling to the pair of them. Y/n has leaned a little closer to Kate, her laughter soft, her smile genuine. Kate's making some grand gesture with her hands, her enthusiasm endearing in its awkwardness. Okay, I think. Maybe she's not so bad.
But still. "I just don't know her." I say finally, my voice low. Wanda hums in understanding, her gaze never leaving Y/n. "But look at her, Nat. She's the happiest we've seen her in a long while." She points out. I know she's right. Y/n hasn't had this kind of lightness in her eyes since the incident. Even in the days leading up to it, she was closed off, burdened by the trauma we had caused her. I couldn't do anything to help her, I couldn't fix what I had broken. And now here comes this Kate Bishop, breezing in like a ray of sunshine, making Y/n smile like it's the easiest thing in the world.
I sigh, crossing my arms tighter over my chest. "Maybe." I admit after a pause, my voice quieter now, more reflective. "Maybe Kate is what Y/n needs right now." Wanda turns her head to look at me fully, a surprised look on her face, but she soon gives me a soft knowing smile. "That's not easy for you to say."
"No, it's not." I say honestly. "But I can't ignore how she's acting. It's good to see her like this." I glance to Yelena who's still grinning like a proud instigator of all this chaos. Y/n has her laughing too, which is aways a good sign. "And Kate, she's not what I expected." I share.
There's an awkward clumsiness about the girl sure. But underneath that, there's a kindness in her eyes, something genuine that makes me reconsider my initial assessment. She's not just some reckless kid, despite the reputation. She cares and that means something.
Wanda places a gentle hand on my arm, squeezing lightly. "It's ok to let your guard down a little." I chuckle under my breath at her words. "I don't think I'm wired that way, Wanda." I reply. "I know." She laughs softly. "But maybe you can try. Kate isn't here to hurt Y/n. She's just, being a friend. Maybe that's exactly what Y/n needs right now." I nod, though my instincts still bristle at the idea of lowering my walls completely. "You're right. But I'm not going to stop being protective. Not after we failed her so badly." My gaze hardens just a fraction. "I can't."
Wanda's expression softens further, understanding in her eyes. "No one's asking you to stop protecting her Nat. Just, give this a chance. What ever it might be." She pleads. I look at Y/n again. She's relaxed in a way I haven't seen her in months. The tightness in her shoulders is gone, replaced by something lighter, freer. And I realise that I'm not the only one trying to protect her. Maybe, in her own way, Kate is too.
"I'll give it a chance." I mutter quietly. "But I'll be watching." Wanda smiles knowingly. "I wouldn't expect anything less." She says as both our gazes fall to our daughter. Just then, Kate says something that makes Y/n burst out laughing, the sound so full of life that it catches me off guard. My heart clenches that it's taken this long. That Wanda and I created an environment where she felt like she no longer belonged in this family.
I know it's going to take time for her to even consider forgiving us. But I know that it's important that she has other people around her that she can talk to and have fun with. If it's just Wanda and me she'll become completely closed off. Maybe being around Kate is exactly what she needs. It doesn't mean I'll let my guard down completely. Not yet. I will always protect her. That's what mother's do. Even if I haven't proven my right to that title in a long time.
_________
As Wanda and I step back into our home, the familiar chaos of our boys welcomes us like a warm embrace. The scent of something sweet wafts through the air, mixing with the sharp, clean smell of wood polish from our recent cleaning efforts. I can hear the muffled sounds of laughter and playful shouting emanating from the living room, and it brings a smile to my face despite the heaviness still clinging to my heart.
Tommy and Billy have been asking about their sister non-stop over the last few days, and every time, I see the worry deepen in their little faces. They've felt the weight of Y/n's absences as much as we have, maybe more.
"Hey, you two!" I call out, my voice breaking through the din. Almost immediately, Tommy and Billy come barrelling into the hallway, their faces lighting up like it's Christmas morning. They launch themselves at us, wrapping their arms around my waist and Wanda's legs in a tangle of limbs and giggles. It's a comforting noise, one that momentarily pulls me away from the weight of the world outside these walls.
"Mom! Mom! How's Y/n? Is she okay?" Tommy's voice rises with excitement, his wide eyes sparkling with a mixture of hope and anxiety. I exchange a glance with Wanda, who stands beside me, her own expression tinged with a protective softness. It's a moment like this that reminds me just how much the boys adore their sister.
"She's still unwell, sweetheart," I say gently, kneeling down to meet Tommy's gaze at eye level. "But she's doing better than she was. She'll be home soon." I try to sound optimistic, but the knot in my stomach betrays me. I know how much they want to see Y/n, and how hard it's been for them to understand why she isn't here with us.
"Soon? Like tomorrow?" Billy asks, bouncing on his toes, his dark hair flopping into his eyes. There's a slight hopefulness in his voice, and it makes my heart ache, knowing they're so eager for good news. Wanda steps in beside me, placing a hand on Tommy's shoulder, her touch gentle and reassuring. "She's going to need a few more days in the hospital, honey. She's got to rest and get better first." I watch the way Wanda's eyes soften when she speaks to the boys, how she has an innate ability to make even the hardest truths sound a little lighter.
"But her birthday is coming up!" Tommy exclaims suddenly, his expression shifting from concern to realization. "We have to make it special for her! Can we plan a perfect birthday for her in her hospital room?" His enthusiasm is infectious, and a flicker of warmth spreads in my chest at his determination. Billy nods vigorously, his face lighting up with ideas. "Yeah! We can decorate it and bring her cake! She'll love that!" The energy in the room shifts, and I can see both boys imagining the decorations they might hang, the cake they might bake, and the joy they hope to bring their sister.
"That's a great idea," I agree, feeling a swell of pride as I watch them brainstorm. "But we need to wait until she's feeling a bit better, okay? We don't want to overwhelm her." Tommy frowns slightly, his brow furrowing in thought. "When can we see her?" His voice is earnest, full of longing. I can hear the worry tucked beneath his words, and it tugs at my heart. "Yeah, we want to see Y/n!" Billy adds, his expression mirroring his brother's eagerness.
Wanda glances at me, and I can feel the weight of our responsibilities bearing down. "We'll take you to see her in the morning," I promise, seeing their faces light up with hope. "But remember, she might be tired and need to rest, so we have to be gentle with her."
"Yay!" Tommy cheers, his voice ringing through the hallway, and Billy joins in, practically bouncing on his heels with excitement. Their joy is palpable, a reminder of the happiness that can still exist even amidst uncertainty and pain.
Just then, Steve steps out from the kitchen, having been quietly observing the boys from a distance. His presence brings a calmness to the chaos, and I find comfort in knowing he's here. "Hey, how are you two doing?" he asks, his eyes twinkling as he takes in the scene of our little family reunion.
"Mama and mom just told us that Y/n is coming home soon!" Tommy exclaims, practically vibrating with excitement, his hands flailing as he gestures animatedly.
"Yeah, and we're planning the best birthday for her ever!" Billy adds, his voice bubbling over with enthusiasm, his cheeks flushed with energy.
"Sounds like you're all set for a celebration," Steve says with a smile, nodding approvingly. He leans against the wall, crossing his arms as he watches the boys with fondness. "I'll leave you to it. Just let me know if you need anything." He shoots us a knowing look, one that acknowledges the weight of what we're dealing with, before stepping back into the kitchen.
As Wanda and I stand there, our boys filled with excitable plans, I can't help but feel a mix of gratitude and dread. Gratitude for the moments of joy, the laughter that fills our home, and the love that binds us together. Sadness that our family isn't complete and dread for the challenges still ahead. We're still on shaky ground, still trying to piece together the remnants of our family after everything that's happened.
But for now, I push those worries aside. I take a deep breath, inhaling the comforting scent of our home, and look around at the smiling faces of my children. "Okay, let's start planning for this birthday celebration!" I suggest, my heart lifting at the idea of planning something special for Y/n.
"We need balloons. And streamers!" Tommy states excitedly, his eyes bright with ideas. "And cake!" Billy insists, his mouth already watering at the thought. "What kind should we get her?"
As we brainstorm, I can't help but smile. We'll take this one step at a time. Tomorrow, we'll bring the boys to see Y/n, and hopefully, we'll be one step closer to bringing her home where she belongs. Hopefully, she'll see that we plan to be the best parents to her and in time she'll forgive us. I feel a flicker of hope, ignited by the boys' excitement and determination to make their sister smile, to show her that she is loved and missed.
"Let's get started," I say, my voice full of warmth as I gather them into a huddle, my heart swelling with pride. Together, we can do this. Together, we can find a way to help Y/n heal, and maybe even begin to mend the cracks that have formed in our family.
Taglist: @reggierizzoli @ordelixx @mousetheorist @oh-thats-cute @bstvst @waiqui @fxckmiup @kosmichs1 @theprincipality
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babychavez · 3 days ago
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Lucky
You had just gotten back into L.A from being gone to Miami on a press run for your new show. You were of course traveling along with your co-Star Nicholas Alexander Chavez. You guys had grown close over the last few months while shooting and also doing press runs together. Well as time has drug on you two had kinda started to see each other but it was nothing official of course.
"I'm so ready to be home and take a nice long hot bath." You groaned out as you slide your sunglasses over your puffy tired eyes.
"My place is closer why don't you just come stay with me tonight and get some rest." Nicholas suggested as he pulled the driver door shut and started the car.
"No. I know you're tired and need some space. I mean goodness you have been stuck with me on the road for what seems like forever now. Just drop me at my hotel and it'll be fine." You said waving off the idea of his.
Nic looked over at you and raised an eyebrow at the command you had just given him. "Really? Now you wanna act like you wanna be in a hotel room all alone?"
You rolled your eyes at Nic, "oh don't even start that crap with me. You know you're tired of me and ready to be away from me for a bit." You remarked back at him in a super bratty way. Nic looked your way with a mischievous smirk on his  face.
"I very much can assure you that I never get tired of being around you. Even if you are in one of your sassy moods, now come here and give me a kiss." Nic exclaimed as he leaned over the center console that was between you two and pushed his lips together waiting for you to meet him the rest of the way. You smiled and shook your head as you pushed yourself up from your seat and leaned forward to make your lips connect with his.
Your heart fluttered when you felt him smile against your lips as you both broke the kiss. "Let's get out of here now." Nic started the car and took off down the road. You watched out the window at the familiar storefronts passing by all the hustle and bustle of people and cars on the streets. You could feel your eyelids get heavy with each street block you passed. You finally saw the road that would lead you on to the freeway and carry you and nic back to his place.
"Take a nap baby, it's gonna be a bit because of the traffic right now. Don't worry I'll keep you safe." Nic told you as he merged on to the highway. You looked at nic and gave him a sleepy smile, as to be telling him okay. Nic reached over and grabbed your hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. You leaned your head back and slowly drifted off to sleep, knowing you were safe and in the best company.
"Baby we're here." You heard a soft voice say. You opened your eyes and saw the inside of the car illuminated by dim light. You pushed your sunglasses off your eyes and to your surprise the sunny sky that you had fallen asleep to was now dark and starry.
"What in the world is going on?" You asked while rubbing the sleep out of the corners of your eyes. You looked out the front windshield and saw no familiar sights, instead you saw a tall white house that was covered by greenery and 2 tall windows that made it look as if the house had 2 glowing eyes.
"Surprise babe." Nic exclaimed as he opened up the passenger door and extended his hand for you to take as you climbed out the door. You looked up and all the stars were bright on shining and twinkling above. You felt a nice almost cool breeze graze your face and you grabbed ahold of Nic's hand and placed your feet on the ground.
"Where are we Nicholas?" You asked as Nic pulled you away from the car and smiled widely at you. You were caught off guard and shocked to say the less because you never would have never guessed he could pull something like this by you.
"Well we have a few days off from work and meetings and traveling so I thought what a better way to spend it, than a little mini us vacation. Away from the noise of the city, people and most of all anyone knowing where we are. It's just me and you." Explained Nic as he embraced you from behind and laid a soft kiss on the side of your head.
"Aww. When did you plan all of this?" You asked him still shocked by the surprise of it all. Nic smiled and took ahold of your hand as he lead you to the front door of the house.
"Stop asking so many questions and just enjoy yourself and this time away we have. Baby sometimes living in the moment is the best way to live. We don't always have to know all the ins and outs of how something came to be. Just go with your feelings." Said Nic with a soft chuckle as he pulled out his phone and looked at something in it. He then punched a code into the lock on the double doors, he pushed open the doors.
You couldn't believe what you were seeing the lights were dim and candles were lite on top of the island in the kitchen with a lovely spread of finger foods and a chilled bottle of champagne in a metal bucket.
"Nic! This place is beautiful!" You exclaimed as you walked into the house and continued looking around.
"Yeah it came out even better than I had imagined it would." Nic exclaimed as he walked over to the island and popped open the bottle of champagne and poured you each a glass. "I knew I wanted to do something special for you since we have been so busy lately."
"Well this is perfect and you did an excellent job." You smiled and praised Nic as you raised your glass toward him. Nic smiled as he clicked his glass to mine and then we both took a drink. You started around the corner of the island to admire the food laid out in front of you when you noticed red petals on the floor. "Uh Nic what are these for?"
Nic was taking another drink out of his glass when he looked down and noticed the petals as well. "Oh yeah! Come here come here!" He exclaimed full of excitement as he grabbed you by the hand and pulled you behind him toward an open set of French doors.
Once out the doors you saw the sand and heard the waves hitting the beach. You could smell the scent of the ocean in the air and also the faint scent of floral. You looked down and saw more petals laying on the back porch they lead the way down the stairs and across the sand toward what looked to be a hammock on 2 post near the edge of the ocean and a soft glow from 2 lit tiki torches.
"Wanna go with me?" Nic asked as he was already pulling you in that direction down the stairs. You smiled and followed along behind him. But Nic didn't stop at the hammock he pulled you out into the water with him. The waves hit the both of you, soaking your clothes, you let out a giggle as you caught eyes with Nic who was smiling ear to ear. Nic grabbed you by the waist and pulled you into him. You looked into his eyes and cupped his cheeks in your hands before you pushed your lips to his.
There you 2 were in the middle of the ocean at night holding each other as the waves crashed into the both of you, you two could care less because you were both lost in each other. You felt a warmth travel across your lower back and then slowly up your sides, it was Nic’s hands raises the soaking wet shirt off your body. You broke apart from each others lips as Nic gave your shirt one last tug over your head and tossed it on to shore.
You returned the favor by taking his shirt off and revealed his toned smooth chest, you both were standing there captivated by the moment and the look in each others eyes. Nicholas grabbed you by the waist and pulled you back into him, he held you so gently and yet tightly as never wanting to let you go. You laid your head on his chest and heard the beat of his heart quicken. You gently swayed back and fourth together in the water being held by Nic made it seem like nothing could ever top this moment. You felt Nic rest his chin on the top of your head but just as you settled he pulled back and looked down at you.
“I’ve had something on my mind for awhile now.” Nicholas said softly as he took your cheek into the palm of his hand and pulled your gaze up to his brown sweet eyes.
“Oh yeah what is it?” You asked slightly nervous.
“I never knew someone like you existed until the day you came in the doorway for our 1st table read. The moment I saw you I knew I wanted you. Then as this time has continued on between us, I feel like I’ve known you forever and that I can be myself with you. I feel like I’m here just for you. No one else.” Nicholas groveled as he ran his thumb across your cheek.
You could feel the redness bubbling up on your cheeks, no one has ever made you feel so special and made you so happy as Nic had. “I have never felt this way about someone Nic. I’m so lucky I met you.
Nic’s eyes twinkled and before you knew it, you were swept off your feet and Nicholas crashed his lips back into yours. You wrapped your legs around his waist and your tongues fought for space in each others mouth.
Nic carried you out of the water and laid you down in the big hammock. You grasped at the top of his pants trying to get them off. But just as you hooked your fingers into the waist of them he pulled away and instead pulled your shorts down and panties all in one swift motion. He tossed them down and then began to pull his pants down himself, you watched as he unleashed his hard cock.
He gave you an almost evil smirk as he pulled you to the edge of the hammock. He teased your wet slit by rubbing the tip of his cock up and down your clit, he smacked your pussy with his cock before thrusting it deep in you.
His cock could be felt in your stomach and made you gasp as you adjusted to it. Nic looked down at you and admired the way you were taking him, he began to slowly move his hips back and forth. You winced as he pushed himself back in each time.
“That’s a good girl. Taking this dick and letting me know how much you’re enjoying it.” Nic said as he bite his bottom lip and tossed his head back and let out a moan into the night sky.
You could tell his pace was increasing and you could feel yourself tightening around his cock with each stroke and the warmth was growing in your stomach. You let your head fall back and enjoyed the noises that were coming from Nic’s mouth, you pulled Nic down closer to your body and intertwined your fingers in his soft brown locks.
You heard the clapping of skin echoing out, Nic popped his head back up so you both made eye contact as he rocked his hips into you harder and harder.
“Ohhhh fuck yes! Fuck me Nic!” You yelled out at him. He pushed himself back up to where he could lay his forehead on yours, your eyes were locked. You could feel the sweat between both of you making you glide easily against each other. You couldn’t hold it back anymore and you let yourself go and got lost in the sweet orgasm as it would overcame your whole body.
“Take this cum baby!” Nic grunted just as he spilled inside of you. You both locked lips as let the moment be.
You laid on Nic chest as he kicked his foot making the hammock swing back and fourth, you both laid there listening to the ocean. Nic was relaxed and happy, he had his eyes closed and a smile on his lips. You and Nic’s fingers were laced with in each others and laid across Nic’s chest, he would wiggle his fingers every now and then to see if you’d response with some form of movement back.
“Thank you so much for planning this, I think this is just what we need.” You exclaimed laying a soft kiss on Nic’s warm skin.
“You deserve this babe. You haven worked your butt off the past few months and you deserve some peace and rest and most of all love.” You were taken back by the last word Nicholas had just spoken. He had never used that word till now toward you. You pop your head off his chest and peered up at him. His eyes were still closed but now the small smile had been replaced with a huge teeth baring smile.
“What did you say?” You questioned him. Nicholas let out a small chuckle and raised his head up to meet your stare.
“You heard me. You deserve to have love and be loved. I love you.” Nic spoke once again. You were overwhelmed by the words but most of all thankful because the feelings he had for you matches up with the ones you had for him.
“I love you too Nicholas.” You exclaimed as you laid a huge kiss on Nic’s lips. You cuddles back into Nic’s chest and closed your eyes and soaked up all of the emotions floating in the air between you two.
You had just opened a new adventure in life and it was very exciting to be venturing into the unknown future with a man as great as Nic. You could feel yourself drifting off with each swing of the hammock, back and forth and back and forth.
“I love you baby girl.” Nic whispered into the wind just as you drifted off to sleep.
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niecotine · 2 days ago
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MAJOR LOSER ╱ kim jennie, m.
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summary ― jennie was the campus it girl. she had a hot boyfriend, good grades, and all the popularity one could ask for. so why did jennie care if you, a nobody, were getting hit on? you were just a loser.
╭ pairings ― kim jennie x ( f! ) reader. ╭ genre ― mean girl au, smut. ╭ word count ― 5k words.
keywords ― cheerleader!jennie, sub!jennie, hard dom!reader, slow burn, brat taming (!!!), dry humping, spanking, begging, masturbation, jennie receiving oral sex, messy, cum eating.
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╰ “. . .isn’t that right, babe?”
╰ the sound of seokhun’s voice snapped jennie out of her daze and she turned to look at him. she hummed in response, mindlessly agreeing with whatever he said. she wasn’t currently dating him, but that might change soon. he was the captain of the college basketball team and she was cheer captain. they made sense.
╰ to everyone around them, they were the perfect match.
╰ right now though, jennie wanted nothing more than to send him away. his incessant talking was interrupting her while she glared daggers at the back of your head.
╰ jennie didn’t like you, or know you for that matter. the two of you had nothing in common besides one advanced chemistry class, in which the two of you were paired up for a project together. that was the only reason she knew your name, or else a loser like you wouldn’t have crossed paths with her anyway.
╰ despite her dismissiveness towards you, jennie had no idea why she was currently so worked up by the sight of you across the cafeteria, getting hit on by a pair of girls.
╰ you probably didn’t even realize what was going on, with the subtle way one of the girls brushed her fingers across your forearm, or shot her friend a look every time you looked away. ugh. jennie was going to be sick.
╰ her freshly manicured nails tapped against the wooden table, stomach churning. seokhun noticed jennie acting antsy and asked her if there was something wrong. despite jennie’s dismissive hum, she finally couldn’t take the sight anymore, getting up and deciding to make her way to you.
╰ seokhun, or their group at the table didn’t bother stopping her. her narrowed gaze was set on the way the girl beside you giggled and leaned against your shoulder, nudging your side.
╰ jennie convinced herself that she was just doing you a favor. yeah. that was it. if you got distracted by those girls, you could possibly put their project at risk. and jennie could end up with a subpar grade. yes, jennie was just doing this to preserve her grades.
╰ “hi.” jennie said, an almost sickly sweet smile plastered on her face as she stopped in front of your table. her eyes were glaring daggers at the girl until she stopped clinging to your side and sat up straight. jennie took that as her green light to wedge herself between you both, gaze not leaving the loser girl. “you can leave. me and her have a project to work on right now.”
╰ jennie rested her hand on your forearm, squeezing the flesh softly (and momentarily being surprised by the firmness). the project had to be submitted in two weeks but the retreating girls didn’t need to know that.
╰ “uh. . .” you started but trailed off, jennie watching the two girls wave at you and walk away in disappointment. “i thought you told me to do the project myself.”
╰ jennie’s nails were digging into your forearm slightly. she was still smiling, her lips curling up so politely that it almost looked sincere. almost. “yeah, but i have a new idea that i just love.”
╰ jennie was lying. obviously. it was the first and most obvious lie possible, but she was willing to take the chance. her grip on your arm only tightened the longer she had to sit there. the loser girls kept glancing back at you as they left the cafeteria. finally.
╰ “right. actually,” you started, tugging your arm out of her harsh grip and standing up, jennie’s eye twitching at the motion as she looked up at you with her sharp gaze. “i’m a bit busy right now. could we discuss it tomorrow? or you could just text your idea to me.”
╰ jenne’s smile dropped from her lips at the emphasis and side-eye you shot her, silently calling her out on her bullshit. the change in her demeanor was almost immediate. she was pissed.
╰ “busy? with what?” a small sigh passed between jennie’s lips as she looked up at you, craning her head back slightly.
╰ “with. . .” you trailed off and averted your gaze momentarily, obviously searching for an excuse, but you didn’t show much of an expression. “personal stuff. the project is due in two weeks. we can talk later.”
╰ jennie hated that neutral expression on your face. it drove her crazy, since she could never tell what you thought. sometimes she swore you were just emotionless.
╰ jennie’s bottom lip puckered in irritation and she placed her hands on her hips. a huff of air passed from her nose and she looked you up and down, pressing on the topic and clearly not wanting to let this go anytime soon. “what personal stuff?”
╰ “. . . nevermind.” you immediately dismissed the topic, as if not wanting to bother arguing with jennie. a flicker of irritation crossed your eyes. “go ahead then. what’s the killer idea for a stupid organic chemistry presentation that you couldn’t wait a day to tell me?”
╰ jennie was satisfied with the annoyed look on your face. it was better than that neutral look. at least irritation was an emotion she could read. as she watched your shoulders slump slightly, a smirk worked its way across her lips. jennie reached out and grasped your forearm again. it was becoming a bad habit. she began to pull you away from the empty table.
╰ “the killer idea is that we’re going somewhere more private to discuss it.” and then she began to push past other tables, pulling you along behind her. she could hear you grumble under your breath as you were pulled along, your annoyance increasing every time people turned to look at you. still, you were silent the entire time you were lead out of the cafeteria and into a private class.
╰ finally, you two were alone. once jennie was sure no one was behind the two of you, she dropped your arm and leaned up against the nearest desk, voice biting as she decided not to beat around the bush. “why were you talking to that loser?”
╰ jennie’s arms crossed over her chest and she raised an eyebrow as she waited for your answer. if looks could kill, you’d have already been six feet under. she watched the way your eye twitched in annoyance. you paused for a moment before replying blankly. “this has nothing to do with the presentation.”
╰ jennie rolled her eyes. she was used to that deadpan attitude of yours, but it pissed her off to no end.
╰ “yeah, well, i don’t care.” jennie pushed off the desk and stepped closer to you, shoving her index against your chest. she hated it, how towering you were. how she had to look up at you, while you had the perfect view of everything she didn’t want you to see. “just answer the question. why were you talking to her.”
╰ now it was your turn to roll your eyes. “i was talking to her because i wanted to. it’s a free country.”
╰ a scoff passed from jennie’s pretty lips at your answer. why’d she even ask? it was a stupid question to begin with. “of course you do.”
╰ her head tilted back and she looked at you, watching a few strands of your hair brush against your cheeks. she was tempted to reach out and touch. her fingers wanted to touch the skin behind them, feel your pulse. wait. no. shut up, mind.
╰ “you have bad taste.” she deadpanned.
╰ “sure. . .” you trailed off with a sigh. glancing at the wall clock, it showed you had 20 minutes left before class. “anything else?”
╰ jennie’s jaw clenched slightly. everything you said, the tone of your voice, the look on your face, even the way you held yourself ― it was all irritating. she wanted nothing more than to smack the indifferent expression right off your face.
╰ jennie stepped even closer until only a few inches separated the two of you and she refused to back away. her own expression mirrored yours as she leaned back slightly, still looking you up and down. “why didn’t you ever text me back last weekend?”
╰ you huffed sharply through your nose. she wasn’t going to let you go, was she? “there was nothing else to say. you were spamming.”
╰ her nose scrunched up in annoyance and jennie narrowed her eyes. that’s when a new feeling started rising in her chest. it was ugly, something she didn’t think she’d feel for someone like you.
╰ “i ―” she began, lifting one hand up to lightly shove your chest again.
╰ “don’t ―” again, her hand pushed against you.
╰ “spam.” and one more time. each word was punctuated with another push.
╰ your expression flickered with something akin to what one would look at an annoying fly, her little shoves not deterring you or moving you much either. “are you done?”
╰ jennie’s nostrils flared as she tilted her head back to glare at you. and why was it so much hotter when you glared? what a weird thing to be attracted to. attracted to. . . wait. she was not attracted to you. no damn way. you were annoying her right now, she should hate you.
╰ the pushes finally stopped as her hand balled into a fist and rested against your chest. “why didn’t you keep the conversation going?” she was getting a headache now from you. why did you have to be so indifferent all the time when she was here feeling so. . . so. . . ugh. what was the feeling she had? she pushed it away, the feeling of wanting to grab your face or punch it or press her own against your mouth. it was annoying.
╰ “because.” you shrugged, unphased. you hoped not reacting to her would bore her out and she’s leave you alone.
╰ she was getting more and more pissed off with every word that passed from your lips. jennie knew she was hot, she was petite and soft and pretty. she was used to getting her way, she was used to men, women and every gender in between falling all over her. but you were indifferent. it was irritating, stupid and infuriating.
╰ she wanted to push you. or punch you. or smack you. or kiss you. oh god. . . why did she want to kiss you all of a sudden?
╰ “anything else you want to say or do?” you scoffed, crossing your arms as you looked down at her, almost tired of being in a constant state of annoyance. “or is her highness going to allow me to get back to class?”
╰ highness? she was not a princess, far from it, but she did look like one. she was the epitome of doe-like perfection and she liked it that way. all the girls either wanted to be her or be with someone like her. and yet there you were, being disinterested and rude to her. acting like she wasn’t the most desirable person around. “oh, bite me.” the words left her mouth before she could even stop herself.
╰ “i will if you keep annoying the crap out of me.” you suppressed a groan, sitting down on one of the seats. you knew she wasn’t going to let you go any time soon until she had her fun with you. gaze flickering around the empty classroom, you eventually stopped to give jennie a once-over, looking at her properly for the first time. her skirt was too short, you noticed off the bat.
╰ jennie’s nose scrunched up with annoyance when she noticed you were checking her out. “shut up,” she huffed and leaned back up against the desk, her arms crossing over her chest. she made sure to shove her chest out more so you could get a better look.
╰ “excellent comeback.” you rolled your eyes and looked away, finding the window more interesting than this mind-numbing conversation.
╰ jennie hated the way you looked right now. arms crossed, shirt tight enough to show how well-built you were for a girl despite your pretty curves, sitting there and looking so relaxed. the more she looked, the more she realized the almost androgynous attractiveness you had. it confused her.
╰ friends, family, strangers alike would fall over themselves to compliment or please jennie, but here you were, acting like you didn’t even care who she was. she wanted to wipe the look off your face. jennie was too used to people unable to take their eyes off her. no one ever treated her like this before and it pissed her off. “ugh,” she groaned, stepping closer to you. jennie reached for your shoulder and shoved you gently. “look at me.”
╰ “there’s nothing much to look at.” you bit back without thinking, your lips twitching upwards slightly, suppressing a small laugh at your own response. “unless there’s something you want to show me that i haven’t seen before?”
╰ jennie’s nostrils flared the moment that last phrase passed from your lips. oh, she really wanted to smack you.
╰ jennie would show you something. show you there was plenty to look at. she stepped up to you and stood in between your legs. slowly, her hands came up and rested on your chest. “i’ve got lots of things i could show you.” she taunted in a low voice, her heart beating quickly. she felt almost lightheaded.
╰ you were momentarily surprised by the fact that she toyed back at you, head tilting slightly as you felt a flicker of interest in your chest (and somewhere else). this was a first. “oh really? then go on and give me an example before i walk out of here. . .”
╰ she’d give you a good example. the best example ever. her hand gripped your shirt and suddenly she was climbing into your lap, settling down heavily against your thighs, both hands now resting against your chest. jennie straddled your lap and she was close enough to see you, to smell you, to feel you.
╰ “does this example work?” jennie breathed out, forcing her voice to sound seductive and not needy like she felt underneath.
╰ “not really,” you looked down at her and your palms settled over her hips. “you’re not the first girl i’ve had in my lap. you’ll have to do more than that to get my attention.”
╰ “is that so?” jennie’s eyes widened for a split second before a defiant look crossed her eyes. she moved, grinding her hips slowly against your own as she bit her lip. her hands began to roam up from your chest, fingers tracing against the skin of your neck and jawline. a shiver passed down her spine the minute she touched you. “do you really think others did better?”
╰ “i guess you’ll have to prove otherwise.” you gripped her hips, fingers slightly digging into the curve of her ass as you made sure the tough material of your jeans rubbed against her clit through her panties with every grind.
╰ a soft gasp escaped jennie’s lips at the feeling and it was almost embarrassing how much she liked the pressure. and the look in your eyes. . . she’d never seen a look like that from you before. her heart was pounding in her ribcage now, feeling more intense than it ever had before. “prove it, huh?”
╰ jennie hummed, leaning forward until her chest was all but pressed against yours, her breath hitting your lips. damn, you smelled good. she felt your fingers slip under her skirt to feel the smooth flesh of her plump ass, squeezing the skin softly as she rolled her hips. jennie moaned softly at the contact.
╰ “you promised to show me a good time,” you mumbled in her neck, nipping the skin under her jaw teasingly. “and yet i’m sitting here and doing all the work.”
╰ jennie’s clit was throbbing softly and she felt her panties dampen as you grabbed her hips and pressed her further into your lap. jennie had the urge to press her face against your neck. she held back, just barely, and let out a slow breath. “you’re ―” she huffed, pushing slightly back into your hands while one of her hands tugged on your hair. she was not going to let you win. “you’re so insufferable, you know that?”
╰ “tch.” you smacked her ass, feeling the fat jiggle under your palm. “careful, brat. you’re not going to get your way with me.”
╰ jennie flinched slightly, but then her eyes narrowed at the fact that your expression didn’t change, still as emotionless as ever. “shut up.” she hissed out, her own grasp on your shirt tugging you closer so she could lean in again. jennie pressed her lips against the skin of your neck, and then nipped gently. “and i always get my way, mutt.”
╰ “that’s it.” your annoyance flared at her words. you grabbed her waist and lifted her off your lap and onto the table, tugging her harshly until she was bent over the surface. keeping one of your palms on the small of her back, you made sure she was pinned face down onto the surface, ignoring her yelp of surprise. “either you behave, or i’ll make you behave. and you’re going to call me ma’am.”
╰ jennie seethed. this was not how this was supposed to go. but the feeling of your hand on her back and the way you were holding her down was making her mind go all fuzzy. jennie pushed against the table, turning her head to glare at you. “i’m never calling you ma’am,” she protested defiantly. “i don’t care how big and strong you are, i’m not following your orders.”
╰ “wrong answer.” your free hand easily unbuckled her skirt and let it slip down her long legs. jennie’s skin was smooth and blemish-free, the sight making you want to mark every inch. your gaze set on her baby blue panties. the cotton fabric was high cut and barely contained the round globes of her ass. you kept her pinned with one hand while the other harshly smacked the right cheek, enough to leave a nice red mark. “apologize.”
╰ jennie hissed through her teeth as your hand came down. it hurt, but it didn’t hurt terribly. just enough sting that was quickly being overpowered by the fire that was starting in her gut. her heart was suddenly beating a hundred miles a minute and she gripped the wood of the table so hard her knuckles went white. “no,” jennie forced out. it came out like a strangled gasp and she wondered why the hell her voice sounded so weak.
╰ “no?” your gaze roamed over her sprawled form. a slight red mark was blossoming in her ass you spanked her harder. you didn’t miss the wobble in her voice and the patch of wetness on the crotch of her panties. “apologize. now.”
╰ “ah!” jennie cried out when another spank landed. another mark that would surely leave a bruise. why was her skin so stupidly sensitive? why was she feeling so weak? jennie should push back up, fight you harder, shove back against your hand. but the moment she tried, the hand came down again. and that’s when she felt that odd throb in her pussy. the need, the want. she was starting to get worked up. “just. . . just shut up, goddamnit.” she tried to snap back, but it no longer held the same confidence.
╰ “what a shame. . . we could be having so much fun,” your voice was cold, but teasing, which was the most emotion you’d ever shown around jennie. unable to hold back, your fingers dipped past her panties to rub her wet pussy teasingly, fingers drenching in her juices. when you heard her moan, you pulled back and spanked her again, mesmerized by the way her ass jiggled. you refused to give her what she wanted. “but you won’t to be a good girl and listen. don’t you know only good girls get rewarded?”
╰ jennie’s pussy pulsed. by now the wetness in her panties was obvious and uncomfortable, and the fact that you were being a prick was turning her on even more. jennie’s skin was burning and her heart was racing. she was starting to get lightheaded and her body was heating up. her breath came out in small pants and she found herself struggling against your hand.
╰ jennie wasn’t a bad girl. jennie was a good girl. jennie needed to be a good girl. “i am a good girl.” she forced the words out, voice almost sounding like a whine.
╰ “good. then apologize. and call me ma’am.” you smirked, feeling a rush as you enjoyed her giving in, but it wasn’t enough. you wanted to reduce her to a whining and needy mess. you wanted to break her princess act and make her beg you to get her off. you wanted her to beg for your fingers in her pussy, your mouth on her clit. “go on.”
╰ “n-no, i. . .” jennie couldn’t say it. she refused to believe she was going to give in this easily. jennie had never given in to anyone, she was used to being the one in control, the one calling the shots. but here you were, forcing her to give in. jennie felt her eyes burn and suddenly she realized she was shaking. her legs were quivering and if you kept this up she was going to collapse. this was embarrassing. “i’m sorry,” she said stubbornly. “i’m sorry, ma’am.”
╰ “beg.” you chuckled, kneeling behind her as you gave her another harsh spank before trailing your tongue over the pink and throbbing skin to soothe the sting. “beg for me to make you feel good.”
╰ “please.” the word spilled out involuntarily and it took jennie a moment for her brain to catch up as she processed what she said. oh god. had she just pleaded with someone like you? begged for you to give her pleasure. jennie was ashamed of herself and her face flooded with heat. her head leaned down, so her forehead was resting against the table. jennie’s voice was quiet as she forced the words out, unable to do anything but push past her shame. “please, ma’am. i’ll be a good girl. j-just make me feel good.”
╰ “hmm, finally.” your fingers hooked her panties and pushed it down, watching the faint wisps of her juices cause the panties to cling to her cunt before peeling off. you wasted no time before licking a long stripe from her throbbing clit to the rosy bud of her asshole, hearing her gasp. you could almost hear the wood creak from how jennie grasped the edge of the table. “and now you can get your reward.”
╰ jennie’s eyes squeezed shut as she shivered from her soaked cunt being exposed to the cold air. the utter shame from the action of being bent over and having her pussy licked in an empty class, especially by someone like you had her clenching and squirming. she felt your hands grasp the flesh of her inner thighs and push them apart to reveal more of her wet and puffy pussy lips so you could wiggle your tongue between more easily.
╰ jennie’s moans and mewls wouldn’t stop, especially when the hot appendage of your tongue laved over her swollen clit repeatedly, the sensitive bud throbbing. your tongue dipped lower and prodded her tight slit, feeling the walls of her cunt clench around the muscle. “needy, aren’t we?” jennie heard you tease, your hot breath brushing against her hypersensitive cunt and causing her to twitch. yet her legs remained spread for your mouth, hips pushing back softly as your tongue and mouth found a rhythm.
╰ “f―fuck. . .” jennie breathed, feeling you pull away to spit on her hooded clit, shaky hand instinctively reaching back to grasp your head and push you back until your mouth met her pussy again. “r―right there.”
╰ you smirked in her pussy as you followed her command, sucking the slippery fold of her clit in your mouth and feeling her jolt, tongue swirling through her dripping cunt. you felt your own panties dampen from the taste of her juices flood your palette, one of your hands slipping into the front of your jeans to rub your clit through your panties while you sucked on her clit and lapped up her juices.
╰ “please.” jennie whispered shakily, her eyes squeezed shut as she felt something tighten in the pit of her stomach. everything else forgotten, her body slipped into instinct as she chased the high that was building up. her thighs were shaking and her mind had blanked. she was unable to think or bother about anything except the feel of you sucking her clit, your head moving from side to side. tongue and teeth lashing on the sensitive bundle of nerves, jennie felt tears gather on her lashline. “please.”
╰ meanwhile you gripped her leg with one hand, your other hand furiously rubbing your own clit as you sloppily ate her pussy. jennie’s shaky fingers gripped your head in place between her legs while she moved her hips back to match your tongue. her cries were incoherent but you could tell how close she was by the way her thighs spasmed and her juices dripped down your chin.
╰ “i’m so close. . .” jennie sobbed, voice a trembling whimper as she struggled for breaths, propping her leg on the table and you paused to watch the way her pussy lips peeled open, dripping with a mix of her creamy juices and your saliva. you pressed your face between her legs, fingers working your own clit quickly while you lapped at the hardened bundle of nerves. you didn’t forget to give her fluttering hole some attention, pushing your tongue in and out of the sopping slit.
╰ jennie’s cries increased in pitch and volume while your tongue lashed at her cunt at a mind numbing pace, feeling her approach her orgasm while you felt your own build up. setting a pace between your tongue and fingers that you both reached your climax together, you felt jennie finally cum in your mouth with a scream, your hips jerking as your moans were muffled between her legs. you ended up coming in your pants with a muffled groan, the vibrations from your mouth prolonging jennie’s orgasm as she bucked her hips back into your face.
╰ her thighs continued to tremble and her eyes rolled back, expecting you to stop once your orgasm had subsided; however, you continued licking at jennie’s walls. she let out a pained groan, trying to tug your hair away from her over-sensitised pussy, but you were stronger and held yourself there as you continued eating her out until her legs shook and she cried out. “n―no more!”
╰ you panted softly as you hesitantly pulled away. strings of her juices connected her pussy to your mouth as you licked your lips and wiped your chin with the back of your hand. both of you were gasping your breath as jennie shakily turned herself over and glanced at you, her eyes dazed and head tipped back.
╰ jennie struggled for breath, glancing at the ceiling as she attempted to gather her wits and grasp what she had just done. she was interrupted by the sound of the bell, signaling her class starting somewhere in the building as dread began to settle in her chest. what had she done?
╰ she slowly sat up and pushed herself up off the desk. jennie’s movements were slow and careful, trying not to show just how weak her legs felt right now. her face was flushed and her breaths came out in pants. why the hell did she get so riled up like that? it made her mad. it made her want to punch you and kiss you at the same time.
╰ jennie quickly pulled her skirt up and tucked her blouse back in, avoiding your gaze still kneeling by her the whole time. “i’m―i’m just going to go to class.” she didn’t know what else to say. jennie was still in denial about the whole situation. it all still felt like a fever dream.
╰ “oh? already?” you cleared your throat, an amused glint in your eyes. you were unable to keep the smirk off your face as you watched her avoid your eyes and get ready to leave. it was pleasing to see how the bitchy little cheerleader reduced to a meek mess just from your tongue. “what a shame. . .”
╰ jennie was not a mess. she wasn’t. sure, her body was on fire and the ache between her legs was annoying and frustrating, but she was not a mess. in fact, she felt more clear headed than she had in a long time. only because of the kind of release she just had that left her satisfied beyond measure. not that she’d ever admit that to you.
╰ her eyes narrowed, but jennie still was avoiding your gaze. “i need to go to class,” she mumbled again before quickly turning to leave the classroom. ugh. she hated you.
╰ jennie stormed towards her locker with a frown. her body was a mess of emotions. frustration, anger and. . . need. wait, need? again?
╰ she took a moment to rest her back against her locker and let out a slow breath. the interaction ran through her mind and she huffed, trying to calm herself. god, you were so infuriating. jennie’s fingers gently touched her now-tender skin and she hissed slightly. you’d bruised her.
╰ this can never happen again, jennie told herself. yet every time she recalled the last glance she had of you wiping your lips after giving her the most mind-blowing head she'd ever received, she felt her pussy flutter in tandem with her heart.
╰ still, the dread didn't pass. god, what had jennie done? she put herself in an intimate position with a girl she claimed was a nobody. jennie had never been with a girl like that. did it always feel so good? it was hard to admit, but the truth was, she liked it.
╰ and fortunately for you, she wanted more. so who was the bigger loser now?
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cred, niecotine.
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cailinsblog · 2 days ago
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Homecoming Hugs-
Quinn hughes x reader
No warnings but this one is one of my favourites
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The clock ticked to 2:00 a.m. when Quinn Hughes finally arrived home after a long, four-day road trip. Exhausted but grateful to be back, he quietly turned his key, slipping through the door with a practiced stealth. The house was dark and quiet, and he smiled to himself, hoping he wouldn’t wake anyone.
With soft steps, he set down his bag and took off his shoes, padding his way to the bedroom. As he passed down the hallway, he paused outside Charles’s room, peeking in at his son’s small figure tucked under a mountain of blankets. Charles was just five years old, full of boundless energy and wide-eyed wonder, and Quinn always looked forward to coming home to his bright little smile.
Finally, he slipped into his room, seeing Y/N curled up in bed. She looked so peaceful, her breaths even and steady. He knew she’d probably stayed up late herself, waiting up until she couldn’t keep her eyes open any longer.
Quietly, he changed into more comfortable clothes and began to settle in when he heard a soft, sleepy voice.
“Daddy?”
Quinn nearly jumped, turning to see a tiny figure standing in the doorway, rubbing his eyes with a chubby fist. Charles, with his tousled hair and sleepy expression, looked up at him with a half-awake smile.
“Charles, buddy! What are you doing up?” Quinn whispered, kneeling down so he was eye-level with his little boy.
“I heard you, Daddy,” Charles murmured, walking closer and reaching out for him. “I missed you.”
Quinn’s heart melted. He scooped Charles up, pulling him close. “I missed you too, little man. I didn’t mean to wake you up.”
Charles nuzzled into his dad’s shoulder, his tiny arms wrapping around Quinn’s neck. “S’okay,” he mumbled, already half-asleep again but unwilling to let go.
Y/N stirred awake at the sound, her eyes fluttering open as she took in the scene. She watched them with a soft smile, feeling her heart swell at the sight of Quinn and Charles together.
Quinn sat on the edge of the bed, gently rocking Charles, who was already nodding off in his arms. He kissed the top of his son’s head, feeling the warmth and weight of him, grateful for this quiet moment. He looked over at Y/N, giving her a tender smile.
“Hey, you’re home,” she whispered, reaching over to squeeze his hand.
“Yeah, finally,” he said, his voice full of warmth and relief. “I missed you both so much.”
Charles stirred slightly, peeking up at his dad. “Daddy, can we go to the park tomorrow?”
Quinn chuckled softly, smoothing his son’s messy hair. “You bet, buddy. I’ll take you to the park and push you on the swings as high as you want.”
Charles’s face brightened, his eyes shining with excitement, though sleep was quickly winning him over. “Okay, Daddy. Love you…”
“I love you too, Charles,” Quinn whispered, his heart full.
He tucked Charles back into bed, brushing a gentle hand over his head. Y/N leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder as they watched their little boy drift back to sleep.
Quinn wrapped an arm around Y/N, pulling her close. “Feels good to be home,” he murmured, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead.
She smiled, looking up at him. “We missed you more than you know.”
They stayed like that for a while, soaking in the warmth of being together, knowing that even on the longest, most tiring nights, this was the best place they could be.
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getmeoutofhell · 2 days ago
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HEYY!! i have a req! could you do where like reader dresses up as art for halloween? but like not during the day but when he gets home? like reader is dressed in black and white lingerie? like the top is a white lacy corset and the underwear is black and lacy too?? and when he comes home he just sees the reader and shit goes DOWN! if not its totally okay! make it as long as you want make it as short it doesn’t matter! whatever your heart desires! im sorry if this is also to much to ask for! but ily and take your time or dont do it! whatever youd prefer! 🫶🏻🫶🏻
Art the Clown x F! reader smut
summary: reader decides to dress up as art for a surprise, but he had other plans.
warnings: smut!, cussing.
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it was 9pm, art should be home soon. you look at yourself in the mirror one last time before walking out yalls shared bedroom. you decided today you wanted to dress like him as a surprise. if we’re being technical, your outfit wasn’t exactly like his. it was a lingerie version. before he got home you had also cleaned up the house (basically cleaning up after him as usual). you and art have been together for some time now, meaning yalls anniversary is coming up soon, so you thought now would be the perfect time.
you hear the door downstairs creak open, indicating art’s finally home. you miss him every second he’s away from you. you bought him a phone, to text him while he’s away, and not even a week later he broke it. you told him not to put his phone in the bad of sharp objects, but of course he has to be stubborn and do everything his way all the time. you watch art as he shuts the door and places his bag on the side before stripping out of his clown shoes. he must be really tired to take off his shoes right as he enters the house, it’s rare for him to do that. he then grabs his air horn and starts to abuse it, it’s his way of letting you know he’s home. “hi baby! i have a surprise for you but you have to close your eyesss.” he immediately complies and covers his eyes with hands as you walk down the stairs. you tell him no peaking before guiding him to the living room couch, having him take a seat on the sofa. you can see him smiling due to how high his cheeks are raised, making you smile at him. he’s so cute when he’s not out killing, but his evil side also attracts you in a way.
“okay are you ready?” you ask, placing your hands over arts. he nods like a small school boy, eager to see what his surprise is. you start to count down from 3. “3…2…1…open!” he opens his eyes before looking you up and down with the biggest grin known to man. he starts to clap his hands and toot his horn and the sight of you. “i’m you, kinda.” he loves it!! that’s good, maybe it’ll make him not so sleepy. when all of sudden, he stops clapping and his face goes blank. you step back slowly, confused on his sudden change of emotions. you know art is a ticking time bomb, one minute he’s happy the next he’s pissed off and you don’t know why. as you were about to ask him what’s wrong, he gets up from the couch standing directly in front of your face. you feel his hot breath against your nose as he looks down at you. in moments like these, you feel your heart sink to the bottom of your stomach. what if he decides to just bash your fucking brains in, not caring about you or anything anymore. not that he cares about anything right now anyway, but still. he places his left hand on your cheek. your eyes never left his face. you take notice in his facial features, noticing his wrinkles around his eyes and his blonde eyelashes, his little black hat that he always wears on his head. he was handsome when he was serious, but also he was deadly.
he out of nowhere suddenly grabs you and throws you over his shoulder, making you let out a scream. “art!! what the fuck!” you’re then taken upstairs to y’all’s shared room, as he throws you on the bed. he takes this chance to guide his hands down to your legs, before spreading them open for him. art has this problem where he randomly gets horny, but i guess you did wear the costume on purpose or whatever…but that’s not important right now. you take a look at arts pants, seeing a boner forming. i guess dressing up as him did work. you can’t help but crack a smirk at that. you’ve been waiting all damn day for this moment, so why not enjoy every bit of it. art then starts kissing you up your neck, you feel him leaving hickeys or at least trying too anyway. you slightly moan feeling his tongue slide over your delicate skin. art takes advantage of this, sliding his hand inside of your panties, immediately attaching his ring and minder finger to your swollen clit. “oh!”
you then put your hands on his back, grabbing the zipper to his costume and unzipping it. “baby, let me take this off of you.” he ignores your request by pressing his fingers against your clit harder. a couple minutes later and you’re on the edge of your first orgasm of the day. “baby, i’m gonna cum please don’t stop.” he looks at you and cracks that certain smile that lets you know he might stop at any given moment. you beg him not to, wanting to let your orgasm ride out. he finally rolls his eyes and let’s you cum all over his fingers. it feels so good, you can’t describe how much pleasure he makes you have. someone so cruel and sick like him has your toes curling and back arching. it’s a blessing and a curse. he slowly removes his hand from your underwear, bringing his fingers to his mouth. he shoves them in, tasting your wetness on his tongue. he acts like you’re some sort of drug, he’s addicted to your pussy, it’s his favorite dessert after a long hard day.
his head somehow was now deep between your legs, licking up your pussy lips. the way his tongue dances on your clit makes you think he needs it. he acts like he does. your head was thrown back into the bed, and it felt so fucking good you couldn’t even moan properly. black and white face paint spread all over your inner thighs, but you didn’t care. all you cared about was cumming all over his face. “fuck!” you started grinding over his wet mouth, feeling your second orgasm approaching by the second. it was getting to much to the point where your legs started to shake like no other. what type of spell does he have on you? how does he know how to make you cum so fucking fast? you know you have no answers to those questions. you moan his name like a chant, as you finally let yourself go for the second time. your body couldn’t take it, you were so sensitive and he knew that.
as you’re trying to calm down from your orgasm, art didn’t even give you the time to before he lined his cock up with your entrance. “baby, i can’t take all of this at once.” once again, he ignored you and slide right in. your eyes had a mind of their own as they rolled in the back of your skull. his dick was so good, he’s fucks you like his life depends on it. he knew exactly where your g spot was and always abused that spot each chance he gets. you loved when he marked you as his, the way his cum filled you to the brim and you watched it drip out of you. “yes baby, give it to me! harder!” you moan his name again as skin on skin could be heard from everywhere, his balls slapping your ass. not to long later you feel art slow down his pace, telling you he’s about to cum. you always want him to cum inside so you bring him closer to you than he was already. arts legs started shaking against you. you’re cumming. it’s uncontrollable at this point, feeling your body go limp under him.
you wonder, does he actually know how much you mean to him. does he feel the same way?
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hope this was to your liking!! let me know if you enjoyed :)
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