#their homophobic arguments can be easily debunked using logical facts so try to spend some time researching these facts

[kissfaeries]

Hi irene, I am the Christian bisexual woman who sent you an ask before. Thank you so much for responding to my ask and being so kind. So I am still not entirely convinced and the more I talk to my friends or watch Christian videos the more I feel like they are right. Someone showed me a study that showed that bi women and lesbians are more likely to develop breast cancer and that they are more likely to be dangerously overweight. And bi and gay men are more likely to have aids or HIVs +

+ so that mean that's gay sex is dangerous. Also, Lgbt people are more likely to be suicidal. Also some of my friends say that if we start accepting homosexuality we will also start accepting pedophilia and incest. (eventhough I think that's wrong because in the past homosexuality was condemned while pedophilia and incest were accepted, so it's actually that the more we develop the more we accept homosexuality and condemned pedophilia and incest). I feel like my beliefs are easily shaken +

+ like I could be coming to terms with my sexuality but then I come across a homophobic post or talk to a friend and I am back where I started. I am really scared I will waste my life hating myself but I am also scared that my church,family and friends are right. And that I am being brainwashed or whatever eventhough I know it's not true I am just really scared. +

I feel confused and no matter I always feel like it's the wrong choice. Anyhow, thank you so much for responding. I hope this was not overbearing or annoying.🧡🧡🧡

Thank you for coming to me, i hope i can help you! First, i would like to see the study that claims lesbians & bi women are more likely to develop breast cancer, bc it feels to me that it is a highly unscientific claim. There’s no correlation between sexual orientation and the probability of cancer development... it seems to me that it’s more of a homophobic conspiracy theory meant to scare young les/bi women like you. Same with being overweight, how does sexuality have anything to do with being dangerously overweight? When it’s either a genetic condition or something that occurs due to an unhealthy diet? Sexuality is not a factor here.

Secondly, it’s not true that gay/bi men are more likely to have AIDS. “Worldwide, more than 80 percent of all adult HIV infections have resulted from heterosexual intercourse.” Source: https://aidsinfo.nih.gov/news/168/hiv-aids-statistics

That’s something homophobes are obsessed about bc they think it proves homosexuality is deviant and evil, but it’s just a misconception that resulted from the high number of gay victims from the AIDS crisis in the 1980s. And the reason why so many gay/bi men died in that crisis was bc there was no information regarding protection in gay sex, AND the government refused to find a cure for AIDS at the beginning as it mostly affected gay men, so they saw it as “God punishing gay men and cleansing America of homosexuality”. When it started to affect straight people too, that’s when they got serious about it. Besides, gay & bi men having AIDS is not proof that “gay sex is more dangerous”. Gay sex is not more or less dangerous than straight sex, it simply depends on whether or not you’re using protection. If you don’t use it, you’re more likely to get sexually transmitted diseases.

Thirdly, it’s correct that LGB people are more likely to be suicidal than straight people: “LGB youth seriously contemplate suicide at almost 3 times the rate of heterosexual youth. LGB youth are almost 5 times as likely to have attempted suicide compared to heterosexual youth.” Source: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/resources/preventing-suicide/facts-about-suicide/ But how is this LGB people’s fault? How is this proof that being LGB is wrong? In any case, it proves that HOMOPHOBIA is wrong, as it pushes LGB people to kill themselves instead of accepting their true selves: “LGB youth who come from highly rejecting families are 8.4 times as likely to have attempted suicide as LGB peers who reported no or low levels of family rejection. Each episode of LGBT victimization, such as physical or verbal harassment or abuse, increases the likelihood of self-harming behavior by 2.5 times on average.” Source: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/resources/preventing-suicide/facts-about-suicide/ so as you can see, it’s not the fact that they’re same-sex attracted that causes them to be more suicidal... Homophobia is the reason LGB ppl are more suicidal. Homophobia is what’s wrong.

Next, what you said about homosexuality vs. pedophilia/incest is completely correct! Back in the 1800s, it was very common for cousins to marry each other, for example. There was also a case with a king of Spain in the 1600s/1700s (i believe) who was so malformed due to being the result of extreme incest in his family. Pedophilia, was also not condemned, but in fact silenced and protected, especially if the predator was a rich, powerful man (which is the case today as well). There have been lots of cases where a family marries their young, teenage daughter to an older man bc of money, which is also pedophilia. And yet, while these two were not condemned, homosexuality was always demonized. In the 20th century, when pedophilia started to be condemned more, homosexuality was criticized bc they believed they were pedophiles, so that whole thing of “acceptance of homosexuality increases acceptance of pedophilia” is another homophobic argument, as well as also making no sense as you’ve pointed out.

I do believe you’re right, you are someone who doesn’t have strong convictions so your beliefs are easily shaken, and this is mostly bc you don’t have a lot of resources/information/statistics like i do! If you have actual, proven facts that back your arguments, you will realize you are not as easily convinced of homophobic arguments, and it will also be more difficult to manipulate you into hating yourself. Because this is what it’s all about. Regardless of how you feel about yourself, you will always be same-sex attracted. That is something you cannot change. You can spend your whole life hating it, and it still won’t change the fact that you’re bisexual. What i’m doing is not “brainwashing”. Brainwashing doesn’t look like “please accept yourself, love yourself, there’s nothing wrong with you”. I’m trying to make you realize that your friends, family and Church are trying to guilt-trip you & manipulate you into hating your sexuality, using conspiracy theories and old-dated homophobic arguments that are not based on fact, on logic.

I’m not saying you should drop your friends, and it’s certainly difficult to let go of your homophobic family. I’m also from a homophobic family, and it’s taken awhile to stop listening to their homophobic arguments. But it’s possible. And the first step is to surround yourself by people who will accept you for who you are. By being constantly surrounded by Christian homophobes, you will never take the first step to love yourself. You need to realize this. It’s no shocker that you’re here again asking for my advice to deal with your internalized homophobia: it is a logical consequence of spending so much time with homophobes & actually listening to what they have to say. By all means, listen to their arguments. I have listened to them all my life, I had no choice. But see through them: they’re not backed by facts, their only intention is to hurt you, to make it even harder to accept yourself.

Like you’ve said before, you could hate yourself your entire life, but you don’t HAVE to do it. You have a choice. You can start to let go of their homophobic beliefs & values, and realize there’s another path that you can take. One where you don’t have to second-guess yourself, one where you don’t have to cry bc of who you are, one where you don’t have to fear going to hell, one where you can be happy & comfortable in your own skin, and maybe one where you find an amazing woman who loves you for who you are! Is it possible that you can take breaks from seeing your homophobic friends? It is possible that you can go on an exchange trip, or sign up for a club in your city that’s not religious? You will realize this does wonders to your self-steem, and the less time you spend surrounded by people who preach hate & intolerance, the easier it will be to come to terms with your sexuality and start to love yourself.

I wish you all the best❤️