#the words in the pic are from Luke 24:5

[artzee534]

Happy Easter/Resurrection Sunday! ✝

[larrytimelines]

July 2021 complete timeline

July 1 (Thur): Robert Harvey posts a pic of Louis in the studio working on LT2 (link).

Holivia is seen by fans having drinks, walking and having dinner in Island of Giglio (pictures and videos here). Within 30 minutes of pictures dropping, there is an article about Holivia on a romantic Italian getaway (link). Deuxmoi posts a ‘spotted’ pic of Holivia at dinner (link).

Deuxmoi mention Holivia’s Italian vacation in their weekly email newsletter, as well as recap Jason and Keeley going on romantic dates in NY on June 26th - further confirming them as a couple (link).

Jason & Keeley are papped on several dates in NY. Ted Lasso is deemed a strong Emmys contender.

July 2 (Fri): Louis is seen watching a EUROs game with Oli in London (videos and pictures here).

Not seen, but Holivia were taking the yacht pics in Monte Argentario (link).

Ted Lasso is expected to “sweep Emmy nominations”. And everyone loves Ted Lasso.

July 3 (Sat): Louis watching the England EUROs game with Calvin, Charlie Lightening, Ella (E’s bff), Ella’s boyfriend, Eleanor and friends (pics here, here; videos here, here).

Holivia in Rome, attending the England v Ukraine match, they are papped and fans take pictures with Harry (pics here, here, here, here, here, here, here and here; pap pics; videos here, here, here, here and here).

Lottie posted a picture of Freddie on her stories with the text “mini Louis” on it (link).

July 4 (Sun): No updates.

July 5 (Mon): Louis is papped and pictured with fans outside the studio (pics here, here, here, here, and here). 

Yachtgate pics from Backgrid of Holivia dancing, lounging and kissing on a yacht drop and Page 6 exclusive. Pics from Monte Argentario on July 2.

Page 6 exclusive about Jason being in NY with the kids and how he’ll go on a promo-tour for Ted Lasso soon. They talk about how Jolivia take turns taking care of the kids and that he’s dating Keeley.

Jul 6 (Tue): Article and pap pics of Louis debuting his long hair to the press and greeting fans while signing autographs outside the studio. Article is positive, light, and mentions his record-breaking livestream last December (link).

Articles about Holivia’s “romantic” Italian getaway & how well Jolivia are co-parenting

July 7 (Wed): Louis is seen watching the EURO games with friends, including Oli, Eleanor, hot Luke, Alana, Ella (E’s bff), Ella’s bf and more (videos here, here, here, and here, pics here, here, here and here).

Articles about Holivia’s “steamy” kiss and “romantic yacht dance” on their Italian vacation

July 8 (Thur): New pictures and Page 6 exclusive of Holivia on the yacht. They try to distort the timeline and say it’s a different day, when it’s all from the same day. Emphasis of articles is on how hot shirtless Harry Styles is kissing Olivia (link).

And another Page 6 exclusive about Holivia being “holed up at a romantic luxury resort in Porto Ercole”.

July 9 (Fri): Super Hi post a video of Louis recording LT2 at the studio (link). And a fan posts pictures with Louis outside the studio (pics here and here).

Louis posts a video for BSL “sign of the day” challenge (link). Isabella Signs says that all she did to get Louis to film the video of him signing “singer” in BSL was ask him (link).

More articles about hot shirtless Harry Styles kissing Olivia in Italy.

Articles about Jason throwing the 1st pitch at a baseball game with his kids come out.

July 10 (Sat): Louis is seen with Oli and hot Luke at a EURO soccer village in London drinking beer and having fun. A fan reports that he smelled gooooood (pics here, here, here, here, here, here and here; videos here, here and here).

Some articles about Holivia kissing in Italy and Jason with the kids at the baseball game.

July 11 (Sun): Louis is seen attending the EURO final at Wembley with Eleanor (pics), and spotted walking among fans in the streets of London (video and pics here).

Article about Jason and Keeley being a couple.

July 12 (Mon): Exclusive 369 merch is sent out to fans (link).

Articles about Ted Lasso’s “overwhelming” reception.

July 13 (Tue): Jason is the cover of GQ and he confirms he and Onlivia broke up in November 2020, that he hit rock bottom, but has “chosen to land like an Avanger” and is moving on and “not heartbroken”. He says he “still doesn’t have clarity” in regards to their breakup. He also got 20 Emmy nominations for Ted Lasso, which were announced today in a move of HIGHLY calculated timing and PR (link).

July 14 (Wed): Love On Tour is rescheduled to start September 2nd 2021 only in the US. Canada dates are cancelled (link here, and here).

Louis’ DC and NY tour dates are rescheduled (they had been rescheduled a long time ago but many fans didn’t notice) (link).

Articles about Jason’s GQ interview - focus is on his split from Olivia.

July 15 (Thur): Harry likes Gemma’s post on IG (link).

Article about Olivia being focused on co-parenting and how she’ll always do what’s best for her kids (link).

Jason attends the Ted Lasso premiere in LA.

July 16 (Fri): Olivia is papped going to the gym in NY (link).

Deuxmoi expands on trashy tabloid rumors that Holivia getting engaged/married in Italy is a real possibility (link).

Articles about the rumor that Harry and Olivia got married in Italy.

Articles about Jason attending Ted Lasso’s premiere on the 15th, wearing a shirt supporting black English soccer players who faced racist abuse after England’s EUROs loss (article link).

Articles about Jason wearing a bracelet his daughter made him that spells out “daddy” to the Ted Lasso premiere (article link).

July 17 (Sat): Harry is papped arriving in LA (video and pics here).

Jojo pics says a friend saw Harry getting his covid-19 vaccine in London (link).

Fans post a video of them meeting Louis at the beach (video and pics here and here). Another fan claims Louis was close to her work (link).

Eleanor posts picture where Louis’ leg can be seen at a rocky beach (link).

Olivia and her daughter get their nails done in NY  according to Deuxmoi (link). Deuxmoi posts a ‘spotted’ post about Olivia being seen at the Fort Greene farmers market in NY (link).

Articles about Jason wearing a shirt supporting black English soccer players. 

July 18 (Sun): Articles about Ted Lasso.

July 19 (Mon): Olivia is papped arriving in LA, pics and video are released. In the video they ask her about ‘online rumors’ that her and Harry already got married, and what her ring size is. She replies that she isn’t “ever gonna talk to you guys” (link). Article is also released (link).

Deuxmoi posts a ‘spotted’ post about Olivia with her daughter Daisy getting their nails done in NY allegedly on the 17th. They claim they could see both of them smile (even tho they were wearing masks) and dance to WS and her daughter mentions Harry (link).

Jason is papped arriving in NYC with an avocado plush toy after being away on a Ted Lasso press tour (article link). And more articles about Ted Lasso.

July 20 (Tue): Deuxmoi posts story claiming that Holivia “are very serious” and that “word is they’ve talked about” getting engaged/married. She also posted a story about Jeff Azoff (link).

Jason is papped wearing a tie-dye sweater in NY and goes on The Late Show With Stephen Colbert (link). More articles about Ted Lasso and Jason’s anti-racism support.

July 21 (Wed): Article drops clarifying Jason is not dating Keeley and is, in fact, single, and seen out at a bar with friends and model Irina Shayk (link). More articles about Ted Lasso and Jason’s anti-racism support, as well as articles about Jason playing with puppies on GQ.

Articles about Olivia “responding to Harry Styles marriage rumors”.

July 22 (Thur): Louis says on Twitter that he lost his phone during the EUROs, and tweets from an Iphone (link here and here).

Eleanor posts video of Bruce swimming at the pool in Louis’ public house and a picture of herself at the house (link).

Olivia is papped getting coffee in LA (link).

Articles about Olivia “responding to Harry Styles marriage rumors”.

Jason goes on the Today show. More articles about Ted Lasso and Jason’s anti-racism support.

July 23 (Fri): One Direction’s 11th anniversary! Louis thanks fans on twitter (link).

Unseen video of One Direction, shot by Cal Aurand in 2012 is released (video link).

Article about Olivia getting coffee in LA on the 22nd drops (link).

Olivia posts a picture on her IG story at the Dumbo Soho House and says that DWD is nearing the end of picture-lock (link). Picture is likely old.

More articles about Ted Lasso.

July 24 (Sat): More articles about Ted Lasso.

July 25 (Sun): LTHQ announces a giveaway for Walls vinyls (link).

Fan posts screenshots of Harry’s knees in Italy likely between June 18-30th 2021 (link).

Deuxmoi posts a ‘spotted’ post about Olivia getting coffee in LA on the 22nd (link).

Olivia is papped alone in LA (link).

More articles about Ted Lasso.

July 26 (Mon): Deuxmoi posts about Olivia facetiming Harry from a coffee shop in NYC using her back camera, calling her a “boomer” (link).

Article about Olivia being seen alone in LA, and how she’s working on coparenting with Jason, and that she’ll do whatever it takes for her kids. Pics likely from the 25th (link).

More articles about Ted Lasso.

July 27 (Tue): “Article” exclusive with US Weekly about Holivia being so free and having an “ease” to their relationship - justifying them spending little time together (link).

Article calling Olivia a boomer for facetiming with her back camera.

More articles about Ted Lasso.

July 28 (Wed): Louis drops his “summer drop” merch (link).

The Xfactor gets permanently cancelled (link).

More articles about Ted Lasso.

July 29 (Thur): Louis announces The Away from Home Festival in London (link). Articles about The Away From Home Festival (link, link).

July 30 (Fri): Louis liked tweets by bands ‘Johnny Took’ and ‘The Lathums’ (link).

Articles about The Away From Home Festival (link, link, link).

Walls reentered the Official Charts (link).

“Article” about Harry being “obsessed” with his relationship with Olivia and turning into her puppy dog who follows her everywhere (link).

Olivia is pictured in NY via her and her PA’s IG stories (pics).

July 31 (Sat): Harry is spotted in a coffee shop in LA in the morning. He is with his friends Reesh (srilankansunshine) and Al Shearer (pics and video links).

Deuxmoi reposts screenshot and video of Harry at the coffee shop. As well as a message from someone claiming that Harry was working on new music at a studio (link).

Deuxmoi posts (on Aug 1) a ‘spotted’ reel in which Olivia is seen with her kids at Empire Diner in Chelsea NY, as well as walking with her kids there (link). Jason was seen at a baseball game in NY. Dates are uncertain, alleged to be the 31st, but could be 26-31st.

[tabloidtoc]

OK, September 7

Cover Story -- Cher’s dream wedding at 74 

Page 1: Big Pic -- Katy Perry got dolled up in an array of funky ensembles to promote her song What Makes a Woman

Page 2: Contents 

Page 3: Contents 

Page 4: Melissa McCarthy thriving at 50 -- after her milestone birthday Melissa’s opening up about how she overcame hardships to come out on top 

Page 5: For years Prince William and wife Duchess Kate Middleton have watched from the sidelines as Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have dominated headlines but the couple are finally ready to tell their side of the story in a sit-down TV interview -- it won’t be a scandalous interview but it will certainly right a few wrongs and misconceptions 

Page 6: As Drew Barrymore gears up for her talk show premiere she’s counting on her famous friends to bring in more viewers, as Kim Kardashian and Kanye West struggle to keep their marriage afloat Caitlyn Jenner has been sending them well-wishes but Kim would rather Caitlyn just keep her lips zipped -- Kim’s told everyone to keep their opinions to themselves while she works through this crisis one-on-one with Kanye but Cait’s been sounding off and telling anyone who’ll listen how she believes he’s gotten a raw deal, Chrishell Stause is out to destroy ex Justin Hartley’s reputation and his new romance with Sofia Pernas -- Chrishell is bitter and is calling out Justin as a liar and a cheater and telling friends that his new girlfriend should be careful

Page 10: Red Hot on the Red Carpet -- stars sparkle in champagne hues -- Elizabeth Chambers, Angela Bassett, Kim Kardashian West 

Page 11: Jennifer Lopez, Scarlett Johansson 

Page 12: Who Wore It Better? Thandie Newton vs. Georgia May Jagger 

Page 16 -- News in Photos -- Cara Santana celebrated her birthday on the beach in Malibu 

Page 18: Rita Ora vacationing in Corfu in Greece, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and his daughters Jasmine and Tiana, Pete Wentz plays tennis 

Page 20: Nick Barrotta got in a workout while shooting scenes for The Oval, Ireland Baldwin spent the day at the beach with her uncle Stephen Baldwin 

Page 21: Sofia Richie paddleboarding, Alessandra Ambrosio playing volleyball, Gavin Rossdale takes a shirtless stroll on the beach 

Page 23: RHOBH star Brandi Glanville helping wash a friend’s car, Adam Sandler shooting hoops on the street 

Page 24: Inside My Home -- Brittany Snow’s selling her home in Studio City for $2.7 million 

Page 26: The Property Brothers double baby joy -- Drew Scott and his wife Linda Phan are finally expecting and his twin Jonathan Scott’s girlfriend Zooey Deschanel is also pregnant 

Page 27: Ben Affleck is being kept on a tight leash by girlfriend Ana de Armas as she wants to know where Ben goes and who he’s with at all times and she gave him a 9 p.m. sharp curfew, Rachael Ray and husband John Cusimano have found a silver lining in the wake of their devastating house fire as it made them appreciate what really matters most is each other so for their 15th anniversary they’re going to renew their vows with a few added words inspired by what they’ve learned in the aftermath of this tragedy, Bindi Irwin and husband Chandler Powell already have themselves a cash cow in their unborn child because the demand for an interview with Bindi and Chandler about their pregnancy news is huge right now and they’ve learned from her mom Terri Irwin that cashing in at the right time is key plus they could really use some extra money right now since the family business Australia Zoo isn’t doing so well 

Page 28: Ever since Melanie Griffith got word that ex Antonio Banderas had tested positive for Covid-19 she has made it her mission to help nurse him back to health by calling at all hours and texting him with tons of advice to keep his strength up and although Antonio appreciates her acts of kindness his girlfriend Nicole Kimpel feels the two are getting too close for comfort especially since she’s been at his side throughout the ordeal, while the rest of the world is in chaos Cameron Diaz and Benji Madden are keeping cool calm and collected as they dote on daughter Raddix and Cameron is looking for answers about how to raise a child in these crazy times and she’s found crystals and psychics to be so helpful, Love Bites -- Chrissy Teigen and John Legend are expecting baby no. 3, Miley Cyrus and Cody Simpson split, Jesse Metcalfe and Corin Jamie Lee Clark are dating 

Page 29: Meg Ryan and John Mellencamp ended their on-off romance last October and John moved on with Jamie Sherrill but lately Meg has been blowing up John’s phone and he’s happily answering -- Meg’s recent move to Montecito in California brought her closer to John who’s been in L.A. a lot more since that’s where Jamie’s skincare business is -- John thinks Jamie is a lovely lady but he and Meg are soulmates and it’s a matter of when not if they’ll get back together 

Page 30: Cover Story -- Cher is getting married -- the legendary star is set to stay I Do to her 27-year-old rocker beau 

Page 34: Lifestyles of the Young and Famous -- the plush and pampered lives of billion-dollar celebrity kids -- North West, Emme Muniz 

Page 35: Blue Ivy Carter, Harper Beckham, Princess Charlotte 

Page 36: Louis Bullock, Penelope Disick, Shiloh Jolie-Pitt 

Page 37: Moroccan and Monroe Cannon, Apple Martin, Mom Knows Best -- a few of the best mommas in Hollywood -- Jennifer Garner, Reese Witherspoon, Gwen Stefani 

Page 38: Interview -- Selena Gomez dishes it out 

Page 40: How Cindy Crawford stays in tip-top shape 

Page 41: Like Mother, Like Daughter -- Kaia Gerber is a chip off the old block in the health and wellness department 

Page 44: Style Week -- Megan Thee Stallion is Revlon’s new face 

Page 46: Run errands in style with a superchic totally sleek tiny phone purse -- Zoey Deutch 

Page 47: 5 minutes with Tiffani Thiessen 

Page 48: Fashion -- the classic post earring gets a bold and stylish upgrade -- Margot Robbie 

Page 50: Beauty -- beauty booty from around the world 

Page 52: Entertainment 

Page 53: Fall TV preview, Q&A with Mister E 

Page 58: Buzz -- in living color -- these stars recently transformed their dresses -- Jesse Williams goes blue, Lady Gaga in green called Ocean Blonde, Jim Parsons goes blond 

Page 59: Emily Ratajkowski goes blonde, Sarah Hyland goes red, Faith Hill goes pink, Joe Jonas goes platinum, Ariel Winter goes blonde, Gigi Hadid goes darker, Kaia Gerber goes pink 

Page 60: Sound Bites -- Olivia Colman on portraying Queen Elizabeth II on The Crown, Andy Cohen on which Real Housewives he’d trust to babysit his son Ben, Angelina Jolie on quarantining with her six kids, Luke Bryan roasting pal Blake Shelton 

Page 61: Adele responding to a fan who asked when she’d be releasing her next album, Jennifer Aniston on playing a celebrity news anchor on The Morning Show, David Arquette on teaming up with ex Courteney Cox for Scream 5, Kelly Ripa to daughter Lola on her habit of stealing her mom’s crop tops 

Page 62: Horoscope -- Virgo Zendaya turned 24 on September 1 

Page 64: By the Numbers -- Olivia Culpo

[patolozka]

On Crowley and Mary Magdalene META

 So I was thinking about the whole ‘Crowley could be Mary Magdalene’ concept and I decided to put a few things together. I don’t want to persuade anyone of anything I was just thinking.

This META was written for @a-zira-fell and @azirafuck because they were feeding me with this stuff the last week.

 So here is it:

1. Before the GO show aired in May we knew that Crowley wore female clothes at Golgotha from the stills that were shown to us in April. (It was THIS meta by @intersexaziraphale that I read about it). But after the show I think we promptly forget everything about it because there were so many things to think about.

https://intersexaziraphale.tumblr.com/post/184424971273/so-i-realized-that-not-everyone-knows-what-i-do

2. In the show in the crucifixion scene there is this exchange between our duo:

C:           Come to smirk at the poor bugger, have you?

A:           Smirk? Me?

C:           Well, your lot put him on there.

A:           I'm not consulted on policy decisions, Crawley.

C:           Oh, I've changed it.

A:           Changed what?

C:           My name. "Crawl-y" just wasn't really doing it for me. It's a bit too... squirming-at-your-feet-ish.

A:           Well, you were a snake. So, what is it now? Mephistopheles? Asmodeus?

C:           Crowley.

A:           Hmm.

A:           Did you, uh... ever meet him?

C:           Yes. Seemed a very bright young man. I showed him all the kingdoms of the world.

A:           Why?

C:           He's a carpenter from Galilee. His travel opportunities are limited.

C:           That has got to hurt. What was it he said that got everyone so upset?

A:           "Be kind to each other."

C:           Oh, yeah. That'll do it.

 In the script there is no bigger change in the exchange and about Crowley there is not much more than that he is wearing black. But we saw how he looked like in the show.

 3. Then there is this Neil Gaiman’s tweet

Source: https://vintagefloof.tumblr.com/post/186199778332/confirmation-from-mr-gaiman-on-twitter-today-that

 4. And also this meta by @olliaaron about Crowley’s and Aziraphale’s clothing during crucifixion:

https://olliaaron.tumblr.com/post/186239033859/so-i-read-something-about-this-and-heres-an

 5. What do we know about Mary Magdalene

·         She may have been Jesus’s wife, but we don’t know for sure. {ENG Wiki Mary Magdalene}

·         She is for the first time noticed as one of the women who “ministered to Christ of their substance.” (Luke 8:3) {ENG Wiki Mary Magdalene}

·         She travelled with Jesus as one of his followers and was a witness to his crucifixion, burial, and resurrection. (According to the four canonical gospels) {ENG Wiki Mary Magdalene}

·         Mary as one of the women who travelled with Jesus and helped support his ministry "out of their resources", indicating that she was probably relatively wealthy. (Luke 8:2–3) {ENG Wiki Mary Magdalene}

·         There is a statement seven demons had been driven out of her (Luke 8:2–3) and that prompted her to became Jesus‘ follower. {ENG Wiki Mary Magdalene}

·         She was one of women who found the sepulchre of Jesus empty (with Salome and Mary the mother of James) and saw the “vision of angels”. (Matthew 28:5). {Eastons Bible Dictionary} The angel told them that Jesus had risen from the dead. Then the risen Jesus himself appeared to the women as they were leaving the tomb and told them to tell the other disciples that he would meet them in Galilee. (Matthew 28:1–10){ENG Wiki Mary Magdalene}

·         She hastens to tell Peter and John (John 20:1, 2), and again immediately returns to the sepulchre. There she lingers thoughtfully, weeping at the door of the tomb. {Eastons Bible Dictionary}

·         The risen Jesus appears to her but she at first mistook him for the gardener. After she heard him say her name, she recognized him and cried out "Rabbouni!" (which is Aramaic for "teacher"). She tried to touch him, but he told her, "Don't touch me, for I have not yet ascended to my father”. The Gospel of John therefore portrays Mary Magdalene as the first apostle, the apostle sent to the apostles. (John 20:1–10) {CZ Wiki}

·         According to Luke 24:1–12 a group of unnamed women went to the tomb and found the stone already rolled away, as in Mark. They went inside and saw two young men dressed in white who told them that Jesus had risen from the dead. Then they went and told the eleven remaining apostles, who dismissed their story as nonsense. {ENG Wiki Mary Magdalene}

·         After the resurrection she returned to Jerusalem. {Eastons Bible Dictionary}

·         In apocryphal texts, Mary Magdalene is portrayed as a visionary and leader of the early movement whom Jesus loved more than he loved the other disciples. {ENG Wiki Mary Magdalene}

·         The earliest dialogue between Jesus and Mary Magdalene is probably the Dialogue of the Savior, a badly damaged Gnostic text discovered in the Nag Hammadi library in 1945. In saying 53, the Dialogue even attributes to Mary three aphorisms that are attributed to Jesus in the New Testament: "The wickedness of each day [is sufficient]. Workers deserve their food. Disciples resemble their teachers." The narrator commends Mary stating "she spoke this utterance as a woman who understood everything." {ENG Wiki Mary Magdalene}

·         In Gospel of Thomas in saying 114: Simon Peter said to them: “Let Mary go forth from among us, for women are not worthy of the life”. Jesus said: “Behold, I shall lead her, that I may make her male, in order that she also may become a living spirit like you males. For every woman who makes herself male shall enter into the kingdom of heaven.“ {ENG Wiki Mary Magdalene}

·         In Gospel of Philip: And the companion of the saviour [was] Mary Magdalene. [Christ] loved Mary more than all the disciples, and used to kiss her often on the mouth. The rest of the disciples [were offended by it and expressed disapproval]. They said to him, "Why do you love her more than all of us?" The Saviour answered and said to them, "Why do I not love you like her? When a blind man and one who sees are both together in darkness, they are no different from one another. When the light comes, then he who sees will see the light, and he who is blind will remain in darkness."{ENG Wiki Mary Magdalene}

·         The Gospel of Mary: The Gospel of Mary was probably written over a century after the historical Mary Magdalene's death. The gospel does not claim to have been written by her and its author is, in fact, anonymous. Unlike in the Gospel of Thomas, where women can only be saved by becoming men, in the Gospel of Mary, they can be saved just as they are.

 Then there is this:

Source: https://azirafuck.tumblr.com/post/186236114966/so-i-was-already-on-board-with-the-whole-crowley

 6. How we can see Mary Magdalene in art

As you can see, majority of the paintings pictures Mary Magdalene with red hair and more so some of them even in dark colours.

Source of the pic: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_Magdalene

 7. Dan Brown

I’m a big fan of Dan Brown and of course I know his ‘Da Vinci Code’ is only a fiction but still…

According to Dan Brown, there was a woman in Jesus‘ life. According to him, Jesus was married to Mary Magdalene. And according to his book Leonardo da Vinci painted Mary Magdalene on ‘The Last Supper’, not John. And you know what hair colour does she have there? Red.

Source: https://cdn.getyourguide.com/img/tour_img-312981-148.jpg

 Some pieces from book Da Vinci Code about Mary Magdalene

"The marriage of Jesus and Mary Magdalene is part of the historical record... Moreover, Jesus as a married man makes infinitely more sense than our standard biblical view of Jesus as a bachelor... If Jesus were not married, at least one of the Bible’s gospels would have mentioned it and offered some explanation for His unnatural state of bachelorhood." (The Da Vinci Code, 245; cf. 244)

“Behold the greatest cover-up in human history... Not only was Jesus Christ married, but He was a father. My dear, Mary Magdalene was the Holy Vessel. She was the chalice that bore the royal bloodline of Jesus Christ” (Code, 249)

“Jesus was the original feminist. He intended for the future of His Church to be in the hands of Mary Magdalene.” (Code, 248)

“The Church, in order to defend itself against the Magdalene’s power, perpetuated her image as a whore and buried evidence of Christ’s marriage to her, thereby defusing any potential claims that Christ had a surviving bloodline and was a mortal prophet.” (Code, 254)

Source: https://www.westmont.edu/~fisk/articles/bruce_fisk_on_the_da_vinci_code.html (it’s a big article about why it all can’t be true, but it has its moments)

 And I add one of my favorites:

"Who is she?" Sophie asked.

"That, my dear," Teabing replied, "is Mary Magdalene."

Sophie turned. "The prostitute?"

Teabing drew a short breath, as if the word had injured him personally. "Magdalene was no such thing. That unfortunate misconception is the legacy of a smear campaign launched by the early Church. The Church needed to defame Mary Magdalene in order to cover up her dangerous secret—her role as the Holy Grail." (Da Vinci Code, 205)

 8. Gender in Good Omens

We know that angels don’t bother themselves with gender. But to me it looks quite like Crowley was manifesting himself the first four thousands more as a female than as a male.

In the garden of Eden, he is a demon, of course, but still you can see a slit in his clothes. I don’t think Aziraphale has some too. It could be only that his clothes are ragged but still…

In the Noah’s ark he looks more woman then man on the second glance. His long hair, his dress with belt…

At Golgotha it’s most prominent. There you can see he presents himself as a woman.

And after that, only 8 years later, the big change. The short hair, the glasses, all male.

And only other occasion in which we can see Crowley as a female is with Warlock as his nanny. But that is a different story.

 9. So let me summarize it.

v  Mary Magdalene was Jesus’ follower and travelled with him.

v  Crowley knew Jesus, he showed him the world.

v  Mary Magdalene was a witness to Jesus’ crucifixion, burial, and resurrection.

v  Crowley manifested himself as a woman during Jesus’ life and he was a witness to Jesus’ crucifixion.

v  Mary Magdalene was probably wealthy.

v  Crowley has no problem with money.

v  Mary Magdalene is often pictured as a woman with long, curly, red hair.

v  Crowley had for the first four thousand years long, curly, red hair.

v  After the crucifixion Mary Magdalene left and went to Jerusalem.

v  After the crucifixion Crowley left Palestine and went to Rome.

v  Out of Mary Magdalene had been driven seven demons.

v  Crowley is a demon.

v  Mary Magdalene saw an angel (or two angels) that told her Jesus had risen from the dead.

v  Crowley has no problem with seeing angels.

v  Jesus said to Mary Magdalene after resurrection: "Don't touch me, for I have not yet ascended to my father”.

v  Crowley is demon, that could do it. ¨

v  In apocryphal texts, Mary Magdalene is portrayed as a visionary and leader of the early movement.

v  Crowley invented many things and was a leader of a sort on Earth.

v  Three Jesus’ aphorisms are attributed Mary Magdalene: "The wickedness of each day [is sufficient]. Workers deserve their food. Disciples resemble their teachers." She is also described as: "she spoke this utterance as a woman who understood everything."

v  Well, I don’t think like you but I think it’s a pretty good description of Crowley if you ask his co-workers.

v  Jesus said he may make Mary Magdalene male to become equal men.

v  Crowley changed after his death to male and also changed his name.

v  The Gospel of Mary was probably written over a century after the historical Mary Magdalene's death. The gospel does not claim to have been written by her and its author is anonymous.

v  Mary Magdalene’s gospel was found in Egypt covered in feathers.

 10. So I think Crowley could be Mary Magdalene. Crowley and Jesus could be together. Crowley could be the one painted all the time on all the Mary Magdalene’s pictures.

 The idea about Crowley being Mary Magdalene is not mine. It’s all tumblr.

[camelliasion]

all of them u bish

1: is there a boy/girl in your life?- yes there is2: think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them?- sadly... yes3: what do you think of when you hear the word “meow?”- pancake 4: what’s something you really want right now?- to be stress free and stuff5: are you afraid of falling in love?- yes6: do you like the beach?- yes7: have you ever slept on a couch with someone else?- if a couch folds out as a bed... does that count?8: what’s the background on your cell?- pics of me and my friends9: name the last four beds you were sat on?- mine, my sister's, the hotel room from after prom, and I think my mom's 10: do you like your phone?- fuck no it's the crustiest shit 11: honestly, are things going the way you planned?- NOT EVEN NEAR CLOSE12: who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts?- I think my friend Jordan it was for sending homework 13: would you rather have a poodle or a rottweiler?- poodle!14: which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?- idk scoliosis and tendonitis is a pain in the ass and they don't go away but imma say emotional15: would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum?- art museum16: are you tired?- tired of being livid 17: how long have you known your 1st phone contact?- since I was born.18: are they a relative?- it's my twin. 19: would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes?- what ex? But I have an ex fwb and I've considered going back but w the help of friends I've been doing a gr8 job avoiding him......???????? I think?20: when did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with?- he talked to me last night. apologized to me.21: if you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today?- nah22: would you kiss the last person you kissed again?- absolutely23: how many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now?- I'm in bed bruh I take my bracelets off the f. Normally 5. 24: is there a certain quote you live by?- "Yo-Yo Ma died from scoliosis" - my dumb ass twin25: what’s on your mind?- why does my ex fwb constantly lead me on after telling me that I'm not good for his unstable emotions he has around females? why was he so jealous the night after prom? why did he lie about wanting to see me, and does this consistently? 26: do you have any tattoos?- I wish 27: what is your favorite color?- pastel purple 28: next time you will kiss someone on the lips?- hopefully soon? 29: who are you texting?- Lucas Gabrielle 30: think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch?- again, if the couch folds out as a bed... then yes?31: have you ever had the feeling something bad was going to happen and you were right?- when do you not?32: do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?- Cullen, Myles, and Luke my main hawmies and the only people I can trust33: do you think anyone has feelings for you?- oh I KNOW..34: has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?- yes which was a strange time 35: say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you?- it would be so much easier to get over him then... 36: were you single on valentines day?- forever will be!!!1!37: are you friends with the last person you kissed?- yes38: what do your friends call you?- my fwb calls me Q, Cullen calls me queef, Myles calls me koo, Nathan calls me "kuuuuu", and Luke calls me k-hue39: has anyone upset you in the last week?- YES MY SNAKE FRIENDS AND MY EX FWB40: have you ever cried over a text?- yes it was so stupid 41: where’s your last bruise located?- my knee42: what is it from?- dance 43: last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad?- prom night 44: who was the last person you were on the phone with?- raw bean bundt cake45: do you have a favourite pair of shoes?- my. nude. stilettos.46: do you wear hats if your having a bad hair day?- depends on the outfit 47: would you ever go bald if it was the style?- noooo, but I should since my hair is dryer than California before elnino 48: do you make supper for your family?- nop49: does your bedroom have a door?- yes50: top 3 web-pages?- Twitter YouTube and Spotify even tho the fuckING ADS51: do you know anyone who hates shopping?- not that I'm aware of ..52: does anything on your body hurt?- my tendonitis, my scoliosis, my dance soreness from stretching, and my heart53: are goodbyes hard for you?- very54: what was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?- it took me some time to think... literally beer55: how is your hair?- AWFUL. IT'S BLACK ROOTS AND PROGRESSES TO ORANGE AND THEN YELLOW AND THEN STREAKS OF PLATINUM BLONDE WHITE AND GRAY THEN PURPLE ON MY BANGS... SOMEHOW PLUS IT'S SO DRY AND FRIED IT'S WORSE THAN BURNT BACON56: what do you usually do first in the morning?- cri57: do you think two people can last forever?- yes58: think back to january 2007, were you single?- yes I've never had a bf tf59: green or purple grapes?- is there a difference?60: when’s the next time you will give someone a big hug?- I don't give hugs. I receive them. 61: do you wish you were somewhere else right now?- oh yeah I hate home 62: when will be the next time you text someone?- when they text me63: where will you be 5 hours from now?- who even knows 64: what were you doing at 8 this morning.- sitting in my music theory class suffering65: this time last year, can you remember who you liked?- I've liked the same person for over a year 66: is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?- yes! Lucas Gabrielle!!! And ngl ex fwb too....67: did you kiss or hug anyone today?- YES ACTUALLY I HUGGED CULLEN BC BESS FRAN68: what was your last thought before you went to bed last night?- ofc... ex fwb... :D69: have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?- you mean all the auditions I've failed?  you mean every single audition I've ever done?70: how many windows are open on your computer?- normally 371: how many fingers do you have?- the72: what is your ringtone?- Pokemon trainer defeat theme but played by marimba 73: how old will you be in 5 months?- 1874: where is your mum right now?- in her room sleeping 75: why aren’t you with the person you were first in love with or almost in love?- because he doesn't love me and he's a "commitmentphobe"76: have you held hands with somebody in the past three days?- yes but it was a joke 77: are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago?- two years ago was my sophomore year??? so no. :)78: do you remember who you had a crush on in year 7?- as in 7th grade?????? uhhhh this kid name Michael who does crack now.79: is there anyone you know with the name mike?- Michael?80: have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?- no :(81: how many people have you liked in the past three months?- that's since January, so 2-4 I'm guessing????82: has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days?- nop83: will you talk to the person you like tonight?- I'm not allowed.84: you’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with?- probably Cullen 85: if your bf/gf was into drugs would you care?- yes 86: what was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to see a movie?- Luke was there watching Suicide Squad for the 6th time87: who was your last received call from?- my twin88: if someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you?- depends on my mood I guess 89: what is something you wish you had more of?- money and time90: have you ever trusted someone too much?- @ mitch91: do you sleep with your window open?- nop92: do you get along with girls?- HAHAHAHAHAH NO93: are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth?- I'm keeping shit tons of secrets even my best friends don't know 94: does sex mean love?- NO BUT IT LEADS TO IT95: you’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem?- yes and no. yah see he's one horny mother fucker and I get him, but he's also an awful person...96: have you ever kissed anyone with a lip ring?- no97: did you sleep alone this week?- I always sleep alone 98: everybody has somebody that makes them happy, do you?- Lucas Gabrielle!!!!99: do you believe in love at first sight?- nop100: who was the last person that you pinky promise?- Cullen or Myles one of them

[scarletjedi]

do alllllll of them!

oh gdi pop - cut for length

1:Is there a boy/girl in your life?

My lovely wife :D

2:Think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them?

define “hurt” - physically? Of course! I twas an accident and she’s 3. non-physically? yeah, I do.  

3:What do you think of when you hear the word “meow?”

Oh, no, where did you pee!?! (Our cat has been stress-marking)

4:What’s something you really want right now?

Someone else to bring the boxes from my office up to the attic

5:Are you afraid of falling in love?

Already there, luv. It was never the *love* that scared me. 

6:Do you like the beach?

I do! I like to swim, and I’m not bothered by the wildlife. I’m less fond of heat/no shade, but those are manageable. I like the “shore” even better - boardwalk food!

7:Have you ever slept on a couch with someone else?

Yep! Mostly in college, though my wife and I have napped together on the couch a few times. 

8:What’s the background on your cell?

The lock screen is Gimli face-palming from CAA, drawn by the lovely @kooriicolada. My home screen is Legolas laughing from the same pic. 

9:Name the last four beds you were sat on?

Um? I sat on my bed here, my bed at my mother’s house, the bed in the hotel room from my cousin’s wedding, aaaand...my mom’s bed, probably? 

10:Do you like your phone?

I do, mostly. It’s an iPhone 6 and still working, though I should get a new case for it. 

11:Honestly, are things going the way you planned?

I honestly thought I’d be making more money/have a full-time career (thanks for that, economy), but I *did* think I’d be with my forever someone so--yes and no?

12:Who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts?

Ha! My cousin on Christmas eve. I laugh because I remembered that! 

13:Would you rather have a poodle or a Rottweiler?

Rottweiler. 

14:Which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?

Emotional. 

15:Would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum?

Depends on the season. 

16:Are you tired?

At the moment or in general? 

17:How long have you known your 1st phone contact?

12 years. (You do mean “speed dial” yes?)

18:Are they a relative?

Technically? I married her. 

19:Would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes?

No. We all ended for very good reasons. 

20:When did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with?

In person? 5 hours ago. 

21:If you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today?

I’d marry her again in a heartbeat. 

22:Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

Of course :D

23:How many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now?

0! Because I am working. 

24:Is there a certain quote you live by?

Make Good Art. - Neil Gaiman

25:What’s on your mind?

That I have far too much shit in my office. 

26:Do you have any tattoos?

I have a half sleeve of a dragon against a nebula. The nebula is in color. The dragon is not. 

27:What is your favorite color?

It changes. I’m partial to red at the moment, but it’s also been blue and lie green. 

28:Next time you will kiss someone on the lips?

When she gets home tonight. 

29:Who are you texting?

My wife and my best friend. 

30:Think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch?

Yes. I don’t think these questions are made for married couples. 

31:Have you ever had the feeling something bad was going to happen and you were right?

Yep. All the time. My favorite are the “So and so is dead” phone calls that I get--I can tell from the ring. 

32:Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?

yep. 

33:Do you think anyone has feelings for you?

I’d hope it’s my wife

34:Has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?

I hear it all the time. I believe it from my wife. 

35:Say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you?

that depends entirely on the context of the situation. 

36:Were you single on Valentines Day?

Nope

37:Are you friends with the last person you kissed?

Yep

38:What do your friends call you?

my name, usually. It’s short, and hard to make nicknames from. Or “SJ” or “Jedi” or occasionally “Scarlet” 

39:Has anyone upset you in the last week?

Yep. 

40:Have you ever cried over a text?

Not really? 

41:Where’s your last bruise located?

My leg, I think.  

42:What is it from?

I walked into the coffee table.

43:Last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad?

Christmas

44:Who was the last person you were on the phone with?

My mom. 

45:Do you have a favourite pair of shoes?

I’ve a pair of black doc marten boots that I wear nearly every day. They’re the same boots Ray Kowalski wears in Due South. Yeah. I’m that nerd. 

46:Do you wear hats if your having a bad hair day?

Not really. I can’t keep track of them. 

47:Would you ever go bald if it was the style?

Sure. I’ve near-buzzed my hair before. I liked it. 

48:Do you make supper for your family?

I tend to bake rather than cook, and my wife cooks rather than baking. But yeah, we’ve made dinner for the family. 

49:Does your bedroom have a door?

Yep

50:Top 3 web-pages?

By visit? Tumblr, ao3, and youtube

51:Do you know anyone who hates shopping?

*raises hand* Though I hate it less than I used to. 

52:Does anything on your body hurt?

My head. I think i’ve got a weird stress headache thing going on. 

53:Are goodbyes hard for you?

Depends on the situation. I’m a rip off the band-aid sort of person. 

54:What was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?

Coffee. The answer is always coffee. 

55:How is your hair?

Fine, how are you? 

(I need a haircut, but it’s short on my left and longer on my right--say 2 inches vs 6 inches? and my natural blonde)

56:What do you usually do first in the morning?

check my phone. 

57:Do you think two people can last forever?

yeah, i do. 

58:Think back to January 2007, were you single?

Ha! yes! I was. My wife and I started dating that March. (though, to be fair, we were the friends who were practically dating but not officially at that point). 

59:Green or purple grapes?

yes. 

60:When’s the next time you will give someone a BIG hug?

When she gets home from work.

61:Do you wish you were somewhere else right now?

Scotland was lovely. 

62:When will be the next time you text someone?

Probably when I’m done with this meme. 

63:Where will you be 5 hours from now?

sitting on my couch watching tv (or possibly while my wife plays Skyrim), and writing in my notebook. 

64:What were you doing at 8 this morning.

sleeping. 

65:This time last year, can you remember who you liked?

My wife?

66:Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?

My wife. 

67:Did you kiss or hug anyone today?

My wife. I’m sensing a pattern. 

68:What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

I was thinking about @fialleril‘s double agent vader stuff, particularly the post-vader parts. I’m in love with that AU. 

69:Have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?

*looks at stack of rejection letters* Yep. 

70:How many windows are open on your computer?

Browser windows? 1. (11 tabs, tho) 8 total (pages, word, and itunes)

71:How many fingers do you have?

10. 

72:What is your ringtone?

the bobs burgers theme. My mother has the godfather theme. 

73:How old will you be in 5 months?

31. my birthday is St Patrck’s Day. 

74:Where is your Mum right now?

I’m not sure. 5 on a Wednesday? Probably at Ruby Tuesday with my stepfather and their friends for dinner before they go to bingo. 

75:Why aren’t you with the person you were first in love with or almost in love?

I am. I may have dated before her, but I fell in love with her. 

76:Have you held hands with somebody in the past three days?

yep. my wife. 

77:Are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago?

yep! I’ve only added friends since then. 

78:Do you remember who you had a crush on in year 7?

what’s that in American? 6th grade? I don’t think I had one, yet. Unless you count, like, Luke Skywalker. real people didn’t interest me until 7th grade. 

79:Is there anyone you know with the name Mike?

several. I’m related to a few of them. 

80:Have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?

yep. the wife. 

81:How many people have you liked in the past three months?

...i’m not even gonna say it. 

82:Has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days?

*stares at camera like on the office*

83:Will you talk to the person you like tonight?

*Stares at Camera like Ben Wyatt*

84:You’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with?

I’m not doing that? 

85:If your BF/GF was into drugs would you care?

Oh yes. 

86:What was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to see a movie?

I SAW ROGUE ONE. That’s an event in and of itself. 

87:Who was your last received call from?

My mom. Unless you count my wife calling so I could find my phone.

88:If someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you?

It says something about how little money I have that I considered it. COME ON GUYS! COMMISSION ME! I NEED TO PAY OFF MY CREDIT CARD BEFORE MY JOB ENDS.

89:What is something you wish you had more of?

Money and Time. 

90:Have you ever trusted someone too much?

Yep. My consolation is he was terrible in bed. 

91:Do you sleep with your window open?

yep. 

92:Do you get along with girls?

I do! I don’t understand a lot of hyper-femininity (In that, I think its too much work for me/I’m not practiced at it), but I’m cool with them being into it as long as they don’t look down at my boots. 

93:Are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth?

Not that I can think of. 

94:Does sex mean love?

No, but I’m inclined towards liking it better that way. 

95:You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem?

Only if I haven’t eaten recently/there isn’t a bathroom. But you mean sexy stuff, don’t you? You saucy minx!

96:Have you ever kissed anyone with a lip ring?

No, but if I play my cards right, my wife might get to (I’ve been thinking about it, but it depends entirely on my job situation). 

97:Did you sleep alone this week?

nope. 

98:Everybody has somebody that makes them happy, do you?

I do!

99:Do you believe in love at first sight?

I don’t think so--i think love, real love, is based on trust. But! I do believe in that moment of “oh, it’s you!” with someone you’ve never met before, and I do believe in soul mates. 

100:Who was the last person that you pinky promise?

Ahh....*shrug* probably the one friend I have from elementary school. We kept that up through college. 

I HOPE YOUR HAPPY POP! I TAG YOU BACK! ANSWER ALL THE QUESTIONS YOU HAVEN”T YET!

[chadpetersondatingblog]

Short Dating Profile Examples: Over 30 Fun Bios

Similar to how explaining a joke ceases to make it funny, overkill in your dating profile can suck the intrigue out or a first encounter. Too much information can come off as overbearing, leave you with a conversation void on a first date, or simply take up way too much of your time and energy. Below are over 30 short dating profile examples and ideas for some short and sweet approaches to writing your bio that will help you knock this annoying task off your list and get you swiping sooner.

Approach 1: Keep It To The Facts If you had to whittle yourself down to an elevator conversation, what would make the cut? Three to five quick and essential thoughts in your About Me will do the trick, so long as they’re memorable enough for someone to remember you.

1. Natural redhead, unnaturally good at limbo contests, hates seafood but loves goldfish crackers

2. Top 5 movies: Amelie, Se7en, Moulin Rouge, The Emperor’s New Groove, Wet Hot American Summer.

3. I have a twin brother, no he doesn’t look like me, DO NOT EVEN ASK IF WE ARE IDENTICAL.

4. My #1 vacation destination is the Minnesota State Fair, and I don’t understand why it doesn’t make more appearances on Insider.

5. I majored in art. I work as a writer. One Art Degree for sale, perfect condition, $35,000 OBO.

6. I’m afraid of heights, and I can’t swim, so let’s do some land activities.

Pick A Fave And Roll With It Is there a movie you know every line to? An album that shaped your entire adult identity? A hobby you turned into an Etsy empire? Share a quick blurb about it. Those who respond will find a huge part of your life intriguing, and that’s a great place to start.

7. All I want is someone who can sing the Elephant Love Medley Duet from Moulin Rouge with me. My sister could do it, but she always makes me be the boy.

8. You haven’t lived until you’ve tasted a bacon peanut butter chocolate malt from Five Guys. If you’d like to argue with me, I’d be HAPPY to do a taste test.

9. I know every word of the ten-season run of Friends by heart, and my next goal in life is to watch them en Español until I know Spanish.

10. What’s your favorite Jonas Brothers song and why? Mine is Good Night and Goodbye, and in the following dissertation I will explain in detail why they were the best boy band of all time. (cont.)

11. Three years ago I started a book club. We mostly read wine labels.

12. My mood is either the end of Monument Valley, or the end of Inside. Never in between.

13. Sriracha makes everything better.

  Obscure References FTW If you’re not that into pleasantries and small talk, this is a great way to comb through the weeds when it comes to meaningful connections. Go with a line from a TV show that always busts your gut, a not-so-famous historical quote that you identify with, or a nod to your neighborhood’s best kept secret, and those who get the reference are automatically in the club.

14. 42

15. People tend to overlook Vince Vaughn’s most brilliant and nuanced work as “Luke Zoolander.”

16. Do you think Postmates will deliver me a plate of chicken drummies from the Nan’s menu circa 1994?

17. I’m more of a Russ than a Ross.

18. I shot first.

19. Oh to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free, silhouetted by the sea, circled by the circus sands, with all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves; let me forget about today until tomorrow…

  Lead With A Teaser Some may call this click bait, but hey, whatever opens the door to conversation… Tell a joke, but leave out the punch line, post a pic of you with a celebrity and a caption alluding to the insane story, anything that comes off as quirky or intriguing will leave people dying to chat with you.

20. I dare you to ask me what happened when I met Snoop Dogg at a wrestling event in New York City.

21. Look I’m not good at a lot of things, but I can do my make up to look exactly like Blanche Devereaux from Golden Girls, so we should go clubbing.

22. What’s the best thing about living in Switzerland?

23. I have the greatest idea for an app of all time, please inquire if you’re interested in investment opportunities.

24. A/S/L? …No I don’t want to know yours, I want you to guess mine.

25. Of all the things you could walk out of a Jonas Brothers Meet and Greet with, you wouldn’t think it would be a banana. And yet…

  Let Your Social Do The Talking Your social media accounts likely give a pretty well rounded view of who you are as a person, so skipping the cheesy intros and just linking to or referencing the one you’re most active on cuts out the boring middle man. Plus it gives your potentials permission to stalk you, which, let’s be real, they were going to do anyway. At least this way, you own it.

26. Share your top pinned tweet—It’s usually the one that has gotten the most attention. Mine says “I’m tired the way old people are tired at the end of their lives.”

27. Link to your Instagram page—fire selfies and all the delicious food you could be cooking for your future partner… it’s a no-brainer.

28. Download and share a particularly good Snapchat story—Nobody wouldn’t love a 14 second snap of your roommate’s cat being a weirdo.

29. Share the results of your latest Buzzfeed quiz—In case you were wondering, based on my favorite kind of bread, Ryan Gosling is my husband.

30. Link to your list of Twitter faves—They’ll get a good sense of what makes you laugh, your political stance, or whatever it is you choose to focus on on a regular basis.

31. Share the latest Facebook-generated word cloud you made—the center of my last one was my mom’s name, which I know isn’t that appealing, but it’s a conversation starter to say the least.

  You can use any of these approaches or a combination to get you started on a short, but sweet dating profile bio, but no matter which approach you take, the key is to be warm, fun, and engaging. If you can infuse some humor or an interesting talking point into your description, people are going to want to get to know you.

The post Short Dating Profile Examples: Over 30 Fun Bios appeared first on The Date Mix.

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[ashleyjacksonblog]

Short Dating Profile Examples: Over 30 Fun Bios

Similar to how explaining a joke ceases to make it funny, overkill in your dating profile can suck the intrigue out or a first encounter. Too much information can come off as overbearing, leave you with a conversation void on a first date, or simply take up way too much of your time and energy. Below are over 30 short dating profile examples and ideas for some short and sweet approaches to writing your bio that will help you knock this annoying task off your list and get you swiping sooner.

Approach 1: Keep It To The Facts If you had to whittle yourself down to an elevator conversation, what would make the cut? Three to five quick and essential thoughts in your About Me will do the trick, so long as they’re memorable enough for someone to remember you.

1. Natural redhead, unnaturally good at limbo contests, hates seafood but loves goldfish crackers

2. Top 5 movies: Amelie, Se7en, Moulin Rouge, The Emperor’s New Groove, Wet Hot American Summer.

3. I have a twin brother, no he doesn’t look like me, DO NOT EVEN ASK IF WE ARE IDENTICAL.

4. My #1 vacation destination is the Minnesota State Fair, and I don’t understand why it doesn’t make more appearances on Insider.

5. I majored in art. I work as a writer. One Art Degree for sale, perfect condition, $35,000 OBO.

6. I’m afraid of heights, and I can’t swim, so let’s do some land activities.

Pick A Fave And Roll With It Is there a movie you know every line to? An album that shaped your entire adult identity? A hobby you turned into an Etsy empire? Share a quick blurb about it. Those who respond will find a huge part of your life intriguing, and that’s a great place to start.

7. All I want is someone who can sing the Elephant Love Medley Duet from Moulin Rouge with me. My sister could do it, but she always makes me be the boy.

8. You haven’t lived until you’ve tasted a bacon peanut butter chocolate malt from Five Guys. If you’d like to argue with me, I’d be HAPPY to do a taste test.

9. I know every word of the ten-season run of Friends by heart, and my next goal in life is to watch them en Español until I know Spanish.

10. What’s your favorite Jonas Brothers song and why? Mine is Good Night and Goodbye, and in the following dissertation I will explain in detail why they were the best boy band of all time. (cont.)

11. Three years ago I started a book club. We mostly read wine labels.

12. My mood is either the end of Monument Valley, or the end of Inside. Never in between.

13. Sriracha makes everything better.

  Obscure References FTW If you’re not that into pleasantries and small talk, this is a great way to comb through the weeds when it comes to meaningful connections. Go with a line from a TV show that always busts your gut, a not-so-famous historical quote that you identify with, or a nod to your neighborhood’s best kept secret, and those who get the reference are automatically in the club.

14. 42

15. People tend to overlook Vince Vaughn’s most brilliant and nuanced work as “Luke Zoolander.”

16. Do you think Postmates will deliver me a plate of chicken drummies from the Nan’s menu circa 1994?

17. I’m more of a Russ than a Ross.

18. I shot first.

19. Oh to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free, silhouetted by the sea, circled by the circus sands, with all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves; let me forget about today until tomorrow…

  Lead With A Teaser Some may call this click bait, but hey, whatever opens the door to conversation… Tell a joke, but leave out the punch line, post a pic of you with a celebrity and a caption alluding to the insane story, anything that comes off as quirky or intriguing will leave people dying to chat with you.

20. I dare you to ask me what happened when I met Snoop Dogg at a wrestling event in New York City.

21. Look I’m not good at a lot of things, but I can do my make up to look exactly like Blanche Devereaux from Golden Girls, so we should go clubbing.

22. What’s the best thing about living in Switzerland?

23. I have the greatest idea for an app of all time, please inquire if you’re interested in investment opportunities.

24. A/S/L? …No I don’t want to know yours, I want you to guess mine.

25. Of all the things you could walk out of a Jonas Brothers Meet and Greet with, you wouldn’t think it would be a banana. And yet…

  Let Your Social Do The Talking Your social media accounts likely give a pretty well rounded view of who you are as a person, so skipping the cheesy intros and just linking to or referencing the one you’re most active on cuts out the boring middle man. Plus it gives your potentials permission to stalk you, which, let’s be real, they were going to do anyway. At least this way, you own it.

26. Share your top pinned tweet—It’s usually the one that has gotten the most attention. Mine says “I’m tired the way old people are tired at the end of their lives.”

27. Link to your Instagram page—fire selfies and all the delicious food you could be cooking for your future partner… it’s a no-brainer.

28. Download and share a particularly good Snapchat story—Nobody wouldn’t love a 14 second snap of your roommate’s cat being a weirdo.

29. Share the results of your latest Buzzfeed quiz—In case you were wondering, based on my favorite kind of bread, Ryan Gosling is my husband.

30. Link to your list of Twitter faves—They’ll get a good sense of what makes you laugh, your political stance, or whatever it is you choose to focus on on a regular basis.

31. Share the latest Facebook-generated word cloud you made—the center of my last one was my mom’s name, which I know isn’t that appealing, but it’s a conversation starter to say the least.

  You can use any of these approaches or a combination to get you started on a short, but sweet dating profile bio, but no matter which approach you take, the key is to be warm, fun, and engaging. If you can infuse some humor or an interesting talking point into your description, people are going to want to get to know you.

The post Short Dating Profile Examples: Over 30 Fun Bios appeared first on The Date Mix.

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Short Dating Profile Examples: Over 30 Fun Bios

Similar to how explaining a joke ceases to make it funny, overkill in your dating profile can suck the intrigue out or a first encounter. Too much information can come off as overbearing, leave you with a conversation void on a first date, or simply take up way too much of your time and energy. Below are over 30 short dating profile examples and ideas for some short and sweet approaches to writing your bio that will help you knock this annoying task off your list and get you swiping sooner.

Approach 1: Keep It To The Facts If you had to whittle yourself down to an elevator conversation, what would make the cut? Three to five quick and essential thoughts in your About Me will do the trick, so long as they’re memorable enough for someone to remember you.

1. Natural redhead, unnaturally good at limbo contests, hates seafood but loves goldfish crackers

2. Top 5 movies: Amelie, Se7en, Moulin Rouge, The Emperor’s New Groove, Wet Hot American Summer.

3. I have a twin brother, no he doesn’t look like me, DO NOT EVEN ASK IF WE ARE IDENTICAL.

4. My #1 vacation destination is the Minnesota State Fair, and I don’t understand why it doesn’t make more appearances on Insider.

5. I majored in art. I work as a writer. One Art Degree for sale, perfect condition, $35,000 OBO.

6. I’m afraid of heights, and I can’t swim, so let’s do some land activities.

Pick A Fave And Roll With It Is there a movie you know every line to? An album that shaped your entire adult identity? A hobby you turned into an Etsy empire? Share a quick blurb about it. Those who respond will find a huge part of your life intriguing, and that’s a great place to start.

7. All I want is someone who can sing the Elephant Love Medley Duet from Moulin Rouge with me. My sister could do it, but she always makes me be the boy.

8. You haven’t lived until you’ve tasted a bacon peanut butter chocolate malt from Five Guys. If you’d like to argue with me, I’d be HAPPY to do a taste test.

9. I know every word of the ten-season run of Friends by heart, and my next goal in life is to watch them en Español until I know Spanish.

10. What’s your favorite Jonas Brothers song and why? Mine is Good Night and Goodbye, and in the following dissertation I will explain in detail why they were the best boy band of all time. (cont.)

11. Three years ago I started a book club. We mostly read wine labels.

12. My mood is either the end of Monument Valley, or the end of Inside. Never in between.

13. Sriracha makes everything better.

  Obscure References FTW If you’re not that into pleasantries and small talk, this is a great way to comb through the weeds when it comes to meaningful connections. Go with a line from a TV show that always busts your gut, a not-so-famous historical quote that you identify with, or a nod to your neighborhood’s best kept secret, and those who get the reference are automatically in the club.

14. 42

15. People tend to overlook Vince Vaughn’s most brilliant and nuanced work as “Luke Zoolander.”

16. Do you think Postmates will deliver me a plate of chicken drummies from the Nan’s menu circa 1994?

17. I’m more of a Russ than a Ross.

18. I shot first.

19. Oh to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free, silhouetted by the sea, circled by the circus sands, with all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves; let me forget about today until tomorrow…

  Lead With A Teaser Some may call this click bait, but hey, whatever opens the door to conversation… Tell a joke, but leave out the punch line, post a pic of you with a celebrity and a caption alluding to the insane story, anything that comes off as quirky or intriguing will leave people dying to chat with you.

20. I dare you to ask me what happened when I met Snoop Dogg at a wrestling event in New York City.

21. Look I’m not good at a lot of things, but I can do my make up to look exactly like Blanche Devereaux from Golden Girls, so we should go clubbing.

22. What’s the best thing about living in Switzerland?

23. I have the greatest idea for an app of all time, please inquire if you’re interested in investment opportunities.

24. A/S/L? …No I don’t want to know yours, I want you to guess mine.

25. Of all the things you could walk out of a Jonas Brothers Meet and Greet with, you wouldn’t think it would be a banana. And yet…

  Let Your Social Do The Talking Your social media accounts likely give a pretty well rounded view of who you are as a person, so skipping the cheesy intros and just linking to or referencing the one you’re most active on cuts out the boring middle man. Plus it gives your potentials permission to stalk you, which, let’s be real, they were going to do anyway. At least this way, you own it.

26. Share your top pinned tweet—It’s usually the one that has gotten the most attention. Mine says “I’m tired the way old people are tired at the end of their lives.”

27. Link to your Instagram page—fire selfies and all the delicious food you could be cooking for your future partner… it’s a no-brainer.

28. Download and share a particularly good Snapchat story—Nobody wouldn’t love a 14 second snap of your roommate’s cat being a weirdo.

29. Share the results of your latest Buzzfeed quiz—In case you were wondering, based on my favorite kind of bread, Ryan Gosling is my husband.

30. Link to your list of Twitter faves—They’ll get a good sense of what makes you laugh, your political stance, or whatever it is you choose to focus on on a regular basis.

31. Share the latest Facebook-generated word cloud you made—the center of my last one was my mom’s name, which I know isn’t that appealing, but it’s a conversation starter to say the least.

  You can use any of these approaches or a combination to get you started on a short, but sweet dating profile bio, but no matter which approach you take, the key is to be warm, fun, and engaging. If you can infuse some humor or an interesting talking point into your description, people are going to want to get to know you.

The post Short Dating Profile Examples: Over 30 Fun Bios appeared first on The Date Mix.

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