#the way i neeeeeeeeeed this

[attapullman]

While You Were Sleeping: My Big Fat Italian The Wedding Planner? *shrieks*

☎️ Hollywood? Yes? Boy, have I got an idea for you!

I want to smooch every single part of this because it is perfection! Like obviously he falls in love with the girl from Chicago who has been there all along! She's been playing the long game, she knows how good those Callaghan (read: Pullman) boys grow up!

And the vow renewal? The golden Italian sun shining down on Lucy and Jack while they're still hopelessly in love all these years later? There's even a little bit of a Lean™️ when they're getting ready? GIVE. IT. TO. ME.

Also they've definitely kept Lucy's apartment (Chicago rent prices? They are grandfathering that rent price in!) and Baby Boy Callaghan lives there and Joe Jr. is the landlord and Jack and him occasionally go toe-to-toe still when Jack comes to visit. Important to note that the white iron bed frame has been moved to the big house because Baby Boy absolutely knows what has occurred on there and it was immediately booted to the guest room.

Jack and Lucy have zero complaints.

Okay, hear me out, While You Were Sleeping sequel where Jack and Lucy go to Italy.

Specifically for a wedding.

The wedding of THEIR SON (played by Baby Boy Pullman).

Alright, gonna go daydream now, ttyl.

Oh my god, Morgannnn! YESSSSS!!

Not the lovebirds showing their son around to all their favorite spots! Including pointing out the sweet family run hotel they’d stayed at where Baby Boy Callaghan (read: Pullman) was conceived, much to his chagrin (he was for sure a honeymoon baby because Mr Carpenter Man is THAT GOOD)😂

Ok, ok, ok. But imagine this!

There’s sprinkle of “The Wedding Planner” where the bride is too busy to participate in the planning. So who steps into help? Only his Dad’s best friend’s daughter! (The close family friends were obviously invited to go early and eat gelato a couple weeks before the wedding!)

So him and the girl he’s known all his life go to the appointments painstakingly picking flowers and deciding what pasta should be served and sipping on Chianti along the river under the golden sun.

And when the bride finally shows up and they go over all the details that had been finalized at her request, and she hates all of it! Which leads Baby Boy Callaghan (read: Pullman) to realize he didn’t have as much in common with the woman he was supposed to marry as he thought he did. They call it off, he realizes he has feelings for the girl he grew up with 🥰

There’s still a wedding though, his parent’s vow renewal! (They get to have 2 Italian honeymoons, the lucky ducks! And we get to see the ceremony because they deserved more than just an express train railcar moment.)

And scene! 🎬

[pines4thetwin]

Where's the stancest voice kink peeps at?

I need stan getting off on the sound of fords voice and ford getting off on stans (and cause pre-relationship hijinks are my fave) being really fucking awkward when theyre just having a normal conversations cause sometimes one will say something that flips a switch and now theyre both feeling horny and weird and stans like "cut that out thats your twin." and fords like "i need to get outta here rn before my dick explodes"

Add that shit in with the praise/degradation kinks (throw around a lil pet names)

Need Ford to have a whole recording of just Stan saying all of Fords names in different ways and tones and he just stays recording stans voice without stan knowing so he can clip that shit together taking his favorites so he can listen to it when he's wound up and loosing his mind when stan slips and calls him a pet name.

Need stan to go absolutely feral cause Ford hit him with a "Stanley, you idiot!" and he's just in the bathroom beating his dick till his hand cramps up and he needs ford to say it again. Or Ford giving him an offhanded compliment or lowkey condescending praise and stans like that was not at all hot why am i like this but he's sweaty and shaking and gripping the arms of his chair cause he really cant even jerk off cause he hasnt recoved from last time but the way fords voice sounded when he had said it is making holding back really hard (ha!) for stan.

[the-stove-is-divorced]

i wish apple updates, ANY UPDATES, that change one small thing in the worst way possible while giving you no option to take it back, already having taken my info, my data, my privacy, now demanding what little joy and dignity I have left, a very much i hope you perish with fire on your skin and water in your lungs with the knowledge no one will ever love you and no one has.

[fancy-marshmallow]

being not busy on a weekend day is like. Horrible. Like it’s just me and the crushing weight of a million tasks I have to do ON MY OWN TIME there are NO SCHEDULED ACTIVITIES other than playing Pokémon go. Good news I get to eat spaghetti. BAD NEWS I NEED TO REINVENT MYSELF RIGHT NOW

[fawnnpaws]

what u said about patrick blaming himself for art dropping……………. ur mind. neeeeeeeeeed you 2 elaborate. please. show me to me please

I WILL HAPPILY ELABORATE !! based on this post

i feel like because patrick has known art for so long and loves him so deeply, he feels incredibly protective over him, but he doesn’t know a lot about how dom/sub dynamics work at the start of things. he doesn’t know what sub drop is, so he’s not able to identify what’s happening or the fact that he’s definitely going through his own dom drop. eventually you catch on to what’s happening, but it takes a few times for you to see it.

the first time it happens he holds it together in the moment, but just barely. art doesn’t drop too hard, he just gets very quiet and clingy, needs a lot more reassurance than usual, but even that shook patrick up. he kept thinking about it for the next few days. he couldn’t let it go, he felt like something was wrong, but he couldn’t place the feeling. art doesn’t drop again for a few weeks and the feeling fades, he thinks maybe it was a one off thing, just an off day. until it happens again and it’s worse. this time tears stream down art’s pretty face and patrick thinks he’s going to die. his hands shake as he holds art close to his chest, he fights back his own tears because he thinks he needs to be strong for art. he needs to fix what he broke - because that’s what it comes down to - in that moment when art breaks down and asks if he was good, patrick is struck with the thought that this is all his fault.

his fault, his fault, his fault. he did this to art. he had to have said something wrong, sent him on this downward spiral somehow. he was too hard on him. he’s always been that way, too rough around the edges, too harsh, too brash, too loud, too much and somehow still never enough.

as he looks down at art in his arms, at the way he visibly relaxes when your hands run through his hair and coo in his ear about how good he was, his mind swirls with thoughts that he’s not needed here, he caused this problem, he made art this fragile, art is better off in your loving arms because you always know what to say, what to do. all patrick knows how to do is trample on people’s feelings and fuck things up. his voice shakes no matter how hard he tries to steady it, “why don’t you lay with her?”

he tries to start transferring art into your arms, because holding art for even a second longer feels like he’s taking something that’s not owed to him. like he’s doing more harm than good - he’s keeping art from the comfort he actually needs because he’s so goddamn selfish. but art panics. more tears spill down his cheeks and his eyes go wider than either of you have ever seen them. it’s written all over his face, panic, hurt, self blame. ironically, all the things patrick is feeling. art’s breath picks up and patrick nearly shatters into a million pieces when he asks “you don’t want me? was- was i bad?”

silence hangs in the air and time feels like it stops for a moment. you watch the two of them look at each other, hurting in their own ways, searching for words, a life raft, something, anything to fix what they’ve both convinced themselves they’ve broken. art’s lip wobbles, you can see him spiraling, growing more and more sure as the silence stretches on that patrick is going to say yes, he was a bad dog, he doesn’t want him, all of this was a mistake, he doesn’t love him. meanwhile, patrick’s brain has all but shut down, playing nothing but a constant loop of everything he could have done differently to have prevented himself from making art feel this way, stopped himself from taking so much from art, from being so greedy about his puppy and his girl. it’s then that you jump in, knowing your boys well enough to know this was going nowhere fast without your help. you lean over the two of them and run a hand through each of their hair.

“no one was bad, you both are such good boys. can you take some breaths for me?” they both look to you and nod slowly, so you guide them through a couple deep breaths. you keep a hand on each of them, petting their hair, cupping their faces, grounding them back in the present moment. “good. does that feel a little better? this is just an emotional crash, neither of you did anything wrong, okay?”

they nod again, art sniffles and patrick’s brain comes back online for long enough to pull him close again. art goes easily, clinging to patrick like his life depends on it and burying his face into his chest, muffling his little hiccuped sobs of relief. patrick is holding him, you’re telling him it’s alright, his already fragile mind has no reason not to believe you. patrick worries, but he believes you too. you rub your thumb on patrick’s cheek and give him a soft look that says it really is okay, that you’ll talk about it later. for good measure, you lean over art and give patrick a kiss. he returns it in kind and when you separate, you settle yourself down with art sandwiched between the two of you, pressing a kiss into art’s curls. you know this is something the three of you will need trial and error to get right. for now, though, you could all benefit from some simple cuddles and sleep.

[bitch-butter]

Listen I dont want to sound like im being pushy or rushing anything but i neeeeeeeeeed the next chapter of the webgott modern au you have been posting! I feel like im in a drought!

babe believe me I understand lol i'm certainly being pushy with myself too, unfortunately there's just not enough hours in the day! thankfully I've almost wrapped up the next chapter of rivers that I want to put out before anything else, then after that I'm going back and forth between wrapping up everybody wants to rule the world or pretty on the inside first (since the sequel to that is already started👀).

so believe me I'm writing a ton lol just slow going right now probably until July, but I'm trying to come back to life in the meantime ~

here's a peak since you've been so patient 🖤thank you!

“I guess I just thought that maybe if I did things the way other people seemed like they did them I might feel a little bit less…” David thought out loud, mouth closing even as it stayed open, the word that refused to be spoken stopping any further sounds with the force of its consonants. “I don’t know.”

Joe looked at him for a moment that seemed to stretch out into hours before he pulled his eyes away, glancing out the window at the sky, which looked more and more like rain the longer they idled. Finally, he sighed, smoke tinted, and shook his head, giving David a look that he got the sense he was supposed to know how to interpret. 

“I think you and I need to get something straight,” he said, unerring and yet still reluctant.

Barely holding back a snort of derision, David tilted his head back against the cracked window with a low, aggravated sound. “Oh, God.”

“I’m serious,” Joe went on, giving him an impatient glare as he took an anxious pull on his cig. “If what you’re looking to get out of this - this -” he made an unclear gesture between their two lounging forms, cigarette dangling from his fingers. “This thing is a relationship, or validation, then you can count me out of that.”

David raised a brow at him. “You still want to fuck me?”

“I want to fuck you more than I’ve ever wanted to fuck anyone, that’s not the point,” Joe rebuked, his voice a gravelly rumble with the smoke. “But I don’t want you to get the wrong impression here.”

Humming, David gave him a doubtful look. “I think maybe you should tell yourself that.”

“Oh, fuck off.”

“You can say you don’t want to date me but I think you’re full of shit.”

“You need to get your ears checked if you didn’t hear everyone on the planet telling you to stay away from me,” Joe said brusquely. “We can fuck and be friends and that’s cool, but we can’t date each other.”

David shrugged. “Sure.”

“I’m serious.”

“I know you’re serious.”

Joe huffed, rolling his eyes as he took a last drag of the cigarette, foregoing the ashtray and just tossing his spent butt over his shoulder and out the window. “Then stop giving me that smug look like you know what I want better than I do.”

Laughing derisively, David blinked at him, feeling self-assured in the worst way. “You want to date me, you’ll come to that realization in your own time, but you don’t hide it as well as you seem to think you do,” he said obliquely, reaching for his own discarded coffee and taking a bracing sip. 

“You ever meet anyone you didn’t secretly think was dying of love for you?” Joe asked, voice an unamused monotone.

David thought, if anything to pout his face into looking like he was thinking. “Once or twice.”

[mechanicalriddle]

okay im getting a handle on getting a sensible amount of exercise in every week (for body maintenance/heart health purposes). now i just need neeeeeeeeeed to figure out a way to convince my brain to do like 10mins of stretching a night. i dont know where to cram it into my routine that would actually encourage me to do it

[deepspacedukat]

We all know that chocolate is intoxicating to Vulcans (literally), but do we know if they knew that prior to first contact with earth? I like to imagine they didn’t because there’s no cacao or anything similar to it on Vulcan. I also like to imagine Solkar, probably a few days into his mission on Earth, being handed a mug of hot chocolate on a rainy day, and then getting absolutely plastered on accident.

On the same train of thought (but mostly unrelated; just figured I’d tack it onto this ask to avoid spamming your inbox), imagine being Solkar’s first human woman 👀. We’ve already established the men of Spock’s family overall tend to gravitate more towards human mates, so i think it only makes sense that Solkar would have fallen into bed with one rather soon after first contact.

(New paragraph bc I feel like this could honestly apply to Sarek and Soval, or even Vreenak and Letant as well, not just Solkar) He just finds human women so much more vibrant, so much more lively and passionate than Vulcan women. And their scent….fuck, their scent! Vulcan women have pheromones and whatnot too, but they’re nowhere near as potent as that of human women. And humans can’t even smell it; They have no idea the divine aroma that’s right under their noses! It seems like he’s the only one in the entire room who can smell that the little human woman sitting at the bar is ovulating, practically begging to be bred, leaking pheromones like a sehlat in heat.

Anyway, sorry for the Solkar thirst that came outta left field; I just couldn’t hold it in anymore and it seems like I’m the only one who wants to climb him like a tree lmao

OH. MY. GOD.

Don't you DARE apologize for the Solkar thirst. Listen, that man is fine af, and I also wanna climb him like a tree. I mean??? Look at him???? How dare he be that pretty???

*Ahem*

Anyway, you had comments and questions and things. I should probably answer those lol.

As far as the hot chocolate question goes, I doubt the Vulcans would've known about it prior to their first contact. The only way I could see them possibly knowing about it is if we consider the trio of Vulcans that crash landed and spent time in Carbon Creek. There is the possibility that one of them would have tasted chocolate during their months on Earth, but given how poor that town was, they may not have had chocolate readily available in large enough quantities for the effects to be noticeable. So I'm going to assume that they had no idea, and that Solkar 10000000% got drunk off his ass on hot cocoa during that first contact.

On being Solkar's first Human woman: *feral growling and insistent grabby hands* I NEEEEEEEEEED IT.

I could totally see Solkar landing, doing the first contact official stuff, and then a Human woman catches his eye and he's all "It is only logical that I further relations between our planet by making her my mate. Forever. To use a local colloquialism... no 'take-backsies.'"

I...that whole third paragraph you wrote...just yes. YES. 10000000% ABSOLUTELY. Totally applicable to all of those characters, and I'm so fine about it.

*ahem* Feel free to send as many asks as you want anytime, anon! I thoroughly enjoy them, especially ones like this!! 💖🖖

[100februarys]

I neeeeeeeeeed. Need a new job. Preferably one I like.

Please send good job energy my way

Thank you

[lavenderlyncis]

Tell me what you neeeeeeeeeed 😫 buzzfeed top 10 ways that you hate me 🤨 don't ever call a girl crazy 😵‍💫 but lately ☝️ that's exactly watchatryintomake me 😒 my minds racin 😦 I'm impatient 😨 my meditation tells me it's in my head 💁‍♀️ but thereyouagainwithallthecopyandpastin 🕺 say it i know you wont 🤸 eeeeeeeyees oon meeeeee 👯 tell me watcha waaant 😎

[smolskye]

transgember musingz

that post about being transmasc and instinctively rejecting stuff associated with girls/women stuff and having to relearn how to enjoy it is so fucking real and so is the weird last remnants of shame for being into stuff that The Girls are into. for some reason this doesn't apply to my makeup hobby or wearing titty shirts but it does to, like, the stuff i read and write and like.....fantasize about (but not necessarily in a sexy way). people will talk about ways that girls/women generally behave and i was raised as a girl and tried to force myself to be one for a while so it makes sense that i would share life experiences with women! but it still gives me that weird shame. and i'm not even a trans man i am litchrally nonbinary but it's like i feel the need to "average out" my personality/behavior/interests so i'm equally pulling from stereotypically boy and stereotypically girl personalities/behaviors/interests. it's DUMB and SILLY and YET I KEEP DOING IT!! honestly i think it comes from trying to "justify" my gender to people who don't get it. there's no point to it at all. i also think i really need more transmascs in my social circle LMAO i love my cis and trans lady friends and cis guy friends but i neeeeeeeeeed more people i can relate to regarding transmasc stuff

[theprismaticvoid]

I'm in a rambling mood tonight and I just kinda wanna talk about something meaningless. A friend put these tags on a post she retweeted tonight and it just kinda got me thinking (not in a bad way, not mad at you or throwing shade Jade <3)

I feel like this isn't an uncommon sentiment tbh. I don't think anyone would have an issue with advertisements on the internet if they were small, unintrusive banner ads. If a website had a little banner for coca-cola or the latest blockbuster movie, it wouldn't really matter to me or many other people; we basically have the same thing going on with billboards along roads and nobody really complains about those.

And it got me thinking about the reason why we're in this advertising-hell we are now, the constant war between sites trying to either guilt-trip you or lock you out entirely if you use adblock, adblockers trying to get around their detection methods, and users spreading methods to get around the guilt-tripping/lockouts of sites

I think it's easy to just say that companies got greedy and kept demanding more intrusive ads, stepping it up from simple banner images to flashing animated banners to entire videos that they want autoplayed with volume on whenever you open a page, to the point where adblock became necessary to have a good viewing experience, meaning the less extreme ads weren't profitable anymore because less people were seeing them.

I think that's definitely a big part of it, but I don't think it's the whole explanation

And then I suddenly remembered, flash player. Back in the late 2000s/early 2010s, it was everywhere. Nowadays I think most people just remember it for games and video players, but it really was for EVERYTHING at the time - including ads.

That was before HTML5, before it was as easy to make a site dynamic with just stock Javascript - if you wanted to do anything more complicated than images and links, you needed something like Flash Player to do it (that's a bit of an exaggeration, but still, you get my point).

So, advertisements wanted to make things more dynamic than just a banner GIF - more complex animations, reacting when you put your mouse over them, multiple buttons for different sites, etc., and so they were flash applets.

And the important thing about Flash Player is that it was horrible for performance. Flash was a resource hog even with well-programmed stuff, and a LOT of ads at the time were poorly programmed, super inefficient for how simple they were.

I had an absolutely terrible laptop back in 2014/2015, just a very slow clunker that could barely handle browsing the web most of the time, and I remember opening Task Manager and killing Flash Player around every half-hour or so because the advertisements on sites like TVTropes or Wikia were both so abundant and so poorly-programmed that Flash would be taking up like 75% of what little RAM my PC had at the time. A lot of the reasons people recommended installing adblockers was because of the massive performance increase you'd get from not having all of those resource-hogging applets active at once.

So it makes me wonder, would we still be in this ad hellscape we are now if Flash Player hadn't existed, or at least been better programmed? If every flashing banner at the time hadn't been its own independent program running on a slow virtual machine for very little benefit?

I mean, the answer is probably yes, we still would've gotten companies who got too greedy and tried to force more and more intrusive ads on us constantly - but I can't help but wonder how different things could've been if it weren't for all those years of your tabs instantly coming to a screeching halt just because an advertisement wanted to have two links at once and the developers decided the best way to do that would be to make the entire thing a Flash applet.

TL;DR: I'm holding Adobe responsible for every single time I see one of those "Hey, please disable your adblock. We neeeeeeeeeed to show you the most obnoxious advertisements on planet Earth or else our multi-billion dollar company won't be able to keep the lights on :(" messages from a megacorp that could definitely stand to cut corners in other ways instead of trying to guilt-trip people into having a worse experience for their own benefit.

[blue-eyed-bloodstains]

Tell me about the first five photos you have on your phone or camera. in my phone gallery, the first two are selfies. one is a close up, one’s a mirror shot. the third is of our cat and our guinea pig who passed back in September that we had since 2018 both lying next to one another on my fiance’s lap. the fourth is of just our cat on his lap. the fifth is of the same guinea pig wrapped up in a ‘hidey hole’ in the blanket on the couch. 

Have you got any half or step siblings? a stepsister by marriage, and she’s the sister I never had!

Have you ever known someone online and then met them in person? If so, which website did you meet on? I’ve met several people online, two of which I consider sisters who I met in late 2007 and early 2008 respectively. I met the first one from 07 who’s name is Allie, my nickname for her is Bee, and she’s British and lives in the UK. December 2012 she got to go with her class in uni on a school trip to NY and I made damn sure I got there from NJ to finally meet her face to face. best three days of my life, despite hellish circumstances during and revolving around the trip...definitely worth it. I can’t wait to see her again hopefully in the near future since it’s been over a decade since (OMFG THAT LONG?!...)

oh and we met through roleplaying sites for the show Instant Star which was made by the producers and creators of Degrassi.

When was the last time you were sick and what illness did you have? I’m ALWAYS fuckin sick cause of my Cyclic Vomiting Syndrome...

Do you know anyone with a serious anger management problem? ha try my entire family on mom’s side, Mom being the WORST.

What color is your wallet? it’s black, gold zipper and it’s an Eevee wallet so it’s got a big pic of Eevee on it with symbols spread out in the background

Have you seen all the Lord of the Rings movies? many many times over!

Do you have an unhealthy obsession with colored furry throw pillows that are different shapes and sizes? no

Have you ever had to call the cops on someone else before? I don’t believe I ever did personally, but god knows all my life the cops have been called on us cause of the constant domestic violence with my mom and dad, and then later on because of my mom and me....

Don’t you hate it when people suddenly love a celebrity when they die? I mean I don’t take it personally but with anyone, not just celebrity but especially any human being especially those closest to you, it’s fucked up when they make such a scene after the fact rather than while they were still alive. it seems shallow as fuck and fucked up.

What was the last cocktail you drank? Jack and Coke and dear fucking god do I neeeeeeeeeed some right now!

Are you good at keeping running counts and tallies in your head? to an extent but my mind constantly runs so much and adding in my anxiety and short term memory issues...not very well or long

Are there any foods you hate the smell of but like the taste, or vice versa? hmm not sure really

Do you have a dishwasher? no and it sucks not having one 

Do you make to-do lists? no

What pet names do you use for your friends/loved ones? I call everyone hun, guy or girl. obviously babe, baby for my fiance. and my two close girlfriends who I consider sisters, I call one Suga and the other Bee. we also call each other nob too. inside jokes over the years that stuck lol

What pet names do you like to be called? babe, baby, girl (in affectionate way)

Have you ever developed your own film? no

What breed was the last dog you saw? I saw a few out with their owners yesterday on the drive to and from the cancer institute...umm I can’t really remember what kinds, but I could swear one looked like a border collie :P

What’s your favorite thing to do at the end of the day? relax as much as possible, distract with tv, scrolling through my phone, cuddle with the cat

Do you have a hard time letting things go? yeah 

When did you last feel fear? last week cause I slipped and it was obvious from how I was talking on the phone with mom, so needless to say I was terrified she’d text my fiance about it..

What last made you smile? phone call a little while ago with results from an ultrasound I had yesterday on my neck for an upcoming surgery, which were negative for any spreads

Have you ever walked through a sunflower field? yeah when I was very little, Mimi loved sunflowers and I have pictures of us standing in front of one...I don’t remember it though sadly

Are you a fan of Taylor Swift? What’s your favorite song from her? yeah, I’ve got several faves

What’s something great that has happened to you recently? finding out that my fiance saved up/set aside $3,000 so I can finally pay off all my fines from my DUI last year and revoke my probation so it’s finally over...such a fucking unbearable weight and stress for over a year now, is finally almost done and I’ll be free of it hanging over us...

Would you ever paint your bedroom bright blue? not bright but my bedroom at my dad and stepmom’s house I had painted a slate blue shade so it’s kinda on the semi darker side..kinda grayish blue similar to Tumblr homepage but lighter

What’s your favorite way to eat rice? with a fork, and with soy and duck sauce. I can’t use chopsticks to save my life lol

What’s something that has really impacted your life? so many things that I really can’t get into right now...

What did you last have as a snack? David brand pumpkin seeds with the shell (the same brand that makes the best sunflower seeds)

Do you like lima beans? they’re okay

How many bottles do you see from where you’re sitting? a few, wish they were alcohol

Do you ever do these surveys with your SO? no

Do you have a waste basket in your car? currently don’t have a car, but usually do a trash bag hooked around the stick shift, fiance does the same thing but he rarely uses it XD he just tosses stuff in the back or on the passenger side floor where I sit when I’m in it with him

What’s the last wild animal you have seen? birds around our house, and yesterday on the way to the cancer institute we saw a wild turkey along the side of the road :D we get those from time to time around here given all the land and farms

Something you were surprised to learn about your parent’s childhood? just how much partying and drugs they really did compared to the lighter version of honesty I got from them all my life...explained sooooooo much of my very young years (baby-7 years old)

Have you ever told a friend you thought their parent was hot? not to their face...XD

Have you ever destroyed another person’s belongings out of anger? no I grew up with shit being busted and thrown and used as a weapon even, I could never do that ever...

Which painkiller do you use? usually Ibuprofen/Excedrin. I have a prescription for Fioricet which is as needed for severe migraines, which I’ve had all my life genetically from my grandfather on mom’s side but the last several years I’ve weirdly been okay so yeah just over the counter mostly

Would you like to be part of a wedding party? I’ve been a guest to a few, but yeah to actually be like say a bridesmaid would be cool...although I’m waiting on my own wedding right now

Have you ever thrown anything up to hang on the power/phone lines? no

Something you taught yourself how to do? tie my hair in a ponytail and never looked back, write songs, some “feminine” needs...

What is the last song you listened to in a car? we weren’t playing any music yesterday, so I guess the radio station my last Uber had on which was on March 28th

Do you currently feel calm? yeah I’m okay right now

If applicable, what’s your favorite sports team? GB Packers, NY Giants, NY Jets

When did you last sign your signature? about an hour or so ago for a specialty med that was dropped off at my door. I had to sign the receipt to send back to them for no copay, that I received it, and to sign up for text message notifications regarding getting refills and shipping

What cover do you think is better than the original song? definitely Sound of Silence that Disturbed does. David Dreyman’s voice is so fucking perfect for that song, and I love the spin on it that they did. so haunting and beautiful and emotional.

Who is the last person that gave you butterflies? my fiance every day

Are you planning on kissing anyone tomorrow evening? yeah my fiance

Have you ever told a guy you were a lesbian to get him to leave you alone? no 

If you have a favorite television show, who’s your favorite character? impossible considering there’s so many shoes, let alone characters 

[pommancy]

Her iron gaze and then a softer smile, for him, her kirin.

[chainofclovers]

Ted Lasso 2x7 Thoughts

“Headspace” is a very apt name for this episode, in which we learned almost no new information about the characters in Ted Lasso but learned a great deal about the way many characters’ brains work.

Most of the episodes this season have been so full of new information (if you wanna know something about how my brain works, the critique that early s2 episodes lack conflict does not compute), so full of dramatic irony (Sam and Rebecca don’t realize they’re messaging each other on Bantr! Rebecca’s voicemail to Ted doesn’t actually indicate that she spent a significant portion of time panicking and looking for him!), and misunderstandings that it was really nice to spend a bit over thirty minutes on an episode with very easily mappable plotlines.

Ted and Sharon and Therapy

Ordinarily in my little recaps I talk about the characters as real people making their own decisions, because every character on this show feels very real. But I have to take a minute to just, like, celebrate the acting in these scenes. Sarah Niles and Jason Sudeikis brought the perfect energy to each of their three scenes in Dr. Sharon’s office.

The drinking bird toy! The way he switches from nodding along with it to shaking his head no while the bird continues to shake its head yes, just like Ted shook his head no while saying yes, they should hire a sports psychologist! The way he finally stills the bird in the final therapy scene in the episode...but performatively throws the tissue box.

(Someone is going to need those tissues, Ted. It might be you.)

I also LOVE that this is the first time we see Sharon in an extended scene that takes place in a session. We’ve seen her rapport with the players, we’ve seen the results, and we’ve seen the things she does to make someone feel comfortable at the start of a session, and that’s all the information WE need to know to feel confident in her excellence as a psychologist. But because Ted hasn’t been able to fully appreciate those things, it’s so fitting that his sessions are a time for us to learn more about Sharon’s approach along with him.

It’s just...such good acting. The way she tells him he doesn’t need to worry. The kind of charming (but not performatively charming, just...charming) smile on his face when he claims he knows he doesn’t need to worry. And the way his voice changes a little as the conversations progress—deeper, less controlled, with some very genuine Midwestern “ma’am”s.

Sam and Rebecca and Awkwardness

Sam and Rebecca were so awkward when talking to each other in the hallway! If I had been in that hallway I would have been physically unable to stop myself from doing something even more awkward and diverting to make it stop. (I say this as someone who is neither disgusted by or delighted by the direction of the Bantr storyline. This is a good story about two good people who are in very different places in their lives existing in both a manufactured connection and the real, and very different, connection they have when they aren’t glued to their phones. This story is supposed to be awkward and uncomfortable.)

I did like the parallels of their friends sort of urging them on/coaching them through the inherent panic of the three dots that appear and disappear—a source of panic whether you’re the one creating the dots on the other screen or watching them and feeling at their mercy.

I like that in this episode both Ted and Rebecca are loudly broadcasting “I AM NOT IN THE RIGHT HEADSPACE FOR A ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP”—Ted with his rueful awareness that Michelle would be upset if she heard him still referring to her as his wife, Rebecca with her insistence that relationships are doomed and awful even though she’s talking to two people (Keeley and Higgins) in committed relationships.

Roy and Keeley and Space

This plot was a really wonderful...counterpoint? complement? to the places both Ted and Rebecca are in as Ted starts to come to terms with the fact that he’s going to have to deal with his past and the losses he’s suffered (including the loss of his marriage) and as Rebecca questions whether she’s really going to embark on the next phase of a relationship with someone whose identity she does not know.

Because Ted and Rebecca are stuck apart, it was great to see Keeley struggle with needing space from Roy without worrying for a second about whether or not this challenge was a threat to their relationship. (Keeley and Roy aren’t used to long haul relationships, so they both see it as a threat, but the audience doesn’t have to.)

There was so much going on in that boot room. I love the coexisting realities there—Rebecca and Keeley and Higgins treating the boot room as their personal room for secret smoking, but as the crowd grows all these other unspoken dynamics emerge (it’s been two days since the panic attack and this is the first time we see Ted and Rebecca in the same room and there’s no evidence that they’ve talked about what happened with the panic attack or Rebecca’s parents or any of the big stuff).

Everything about Keeley’s plotline this episode reminded me of how Ted and Keeley are so similar (and, to a lesser extent, Rebecca and Roy are so similar). Rebecca and Roy both tend to write things off (Rebecca is so certain any relationship she has will be doomed, but it’s just because of how hurt she already is; Roy wanted to convince himself he was happier as a pundit than as a coach, but it’s just because he was scared of how much he wanted to be back on on the pitch), only able to deal with things when a safe person like Ted or Keeley sort of startles growth out of them. (We talk a lot about how Rebecca should be in therapy, but Roy should too.) And Ted and Keeley! Everything’s great, everything’s sunny, but look at how Keeley stands on her couch and screams in sadness and anger when she blows up at Roy and he leaves.

This time, things work out between Roy and Keeley because he figures out what Keeley was trying to communicate and respects what she needs, but in the future she’s going to have to figure out how to articulate herself more clearly. (And so will Ted...not only in therapy with Sharon, but as everything with the other coaches and the team and Will and basically everyone in his life come to light.)

Nate and Beard and Twitter-Insecurity-Rage

Ahhhhhhhhh.

This plotline made me feel almost as nervous for Ted (the things he doesn’t know) and Beard (the things he knows) as it did for Nate and Colin and Will and everyone.

At first I was really bothered by the repetition of Nate checking Twitter. We know! He’s on Twitter a lot now that he’s semi-famous! He’s obsessed! But then it occurred to me that it’s extremely perfect that Nate checking Twitter becomes this silent refrain building him up or tearing him down based on the latest 280-character compliment or take-down. Because this is how the internet works! You get obsessed with something on it and then check it a million times per day until you feel sick. It could be a dating app, or a trending story, or almost anything. If you check it often enough, the internet won’t even have anything truly new for you...it just feels like it does. So the repetition of Nate scrolling Twitter wasn’t meant to deliver us new information, but rather to mimic the old information coming through again and again.

I feel so deeply for Nate, who’s brilliant about football but unfit to coach because the power dynamics of coaching are a totally foreign concept to someone like him, who relies entirely on external inputs to take his actions. Ted and Beard and Roy all go and learn things and bring them back to the pitch, but none of them have had the capacity to teach Nate how to do this. Even Nate’s private thoughts, which he wrote down during s1, only come to light when Ted prompts him. And when your external inputs are coming from social media and an unappreciative father and a hyper-awareness of insult after years spent on the receiving end of bullying...it’s very dangerous. Maybe even literally physically dangerous.

I also feel so deeply for everyone who interacts with Nate right now, particularly Will.

Some Bonus but Never Extraneous Trent Crimm

Trent in the pub made me NERVOUS. Seeing him in this new place where Ted goes to wind down, almost coaching Ted through lying to him about having had food poisoning?! When they both clearly know that isn’t what happened?!?

It felt very fitting that this uncomfortable yet kind-of-mercifully-executed lie takes place towards the end of an episode full of such positive and negative growth for the characters. Such movement. It felt all wrong (in a good way), like covering something new and smooth and precious with spackle because maybe you actually wanna paint something else after all even though it won’t serve you in the long run to do it. To paraphrase Dr. Sharon, the truth will set you free but first it will piss you off, and Ted’s conversation with Trent is a reminder of all the layers there are to cut through on the way to the truth.

If Apple TV could simply release 2x8 - 2x12 this week, I would bargain with something crazy and miserable like giving up caffeine until October 8, the air date for the season finale. I continue to love this season and to feel the serenity of watching excellent actors execute on excellent scripts...but we’re getting to the point where the momentum’s built up and is heading to ever-scarier places, and I neeeeeeeeeed to knoooooooow.

[littlespoonevan]

PLEAAAAASE the single parents fic I neeeeeeeeeed it

asjkdhfas i'm working on it, i promise!!!!! i was a lot busier than anticipated the past two days so it's set me back a bit but i've got roughly seven uninterrupted hours of laptop time ahead of me this evening so i'm gonna do my best to catch up!!

it's on its way, bud, just a few more days 💖💖💖💖