#the way he says “my little imP” is also cute ngl

[cepheusgalaxy]

"Passionate fornication" im gonna die

[hazbinhotelcanon]

Voxtagram posts - 16 June 2020 to 30 June 2020

These are all the “in character” posts & comments from the Helluva/Hazbin accounts that have recently been popping up on Instagram. Comments from other people aren’t included unless characters interact with them. Since Instagram doesn’t have a chronological feed & timestamps show only the date on posts older than 24 hours, I’ve listed the posts as close to chronologically as I can reconstruct.

I’ve seen tons of fans expressing annoyance/frustration at trying to keep up with these in character Instagram accounts and their new lore and plots. That’s the top reason I started this blog. If you want to see my ongoing logs of the in character Instagram posts, follow @hazbinhotelcanon​!

I’m gonna call these “Voxtagram posts” instead of “Instagram posts” because Hazbin/Helluva Hell's equivalents to our social media sites were apparently named for Vox—Voxtagram, Voogle, VoxTube, Voxcarto—so I’ll use that for the in-universe posts.

Since this is the first “Voxtagram” post, I’ve got a big disclaimer on how “canon” this material is; I’ll put it at the bottom of this post. First, the actual art!

Canon accounts featured in this post: just Blitzo (blitzorodeo) and Stolas (daddy_hoothoot).

16 June 2020

blitzorodeo Here at the stable!!! #horsethings #itwasonly5$$$$$$$$ #selfie❤️ #😈😈😈😈

17 June 2020

blitzorodeo I just cant choose what name to give my horse!! They’re just so good! Which is your favorite 🥺😈😛 #namesrhard #icantwaittowriteitdownagain

19 June 2020

blitzorodeo My horse and I went to the living world. How do you people deal with all this blue

janegumball Blitz, show us your horse blitzorodeo @janegumball 😮👏😢🙌😔 janegumball @blitzorodeo so no horse? Damn... 😔 blitzorodeo @janegumball Push pin (my horse) and i have a special relationship, you cant just ask for pictures of my horse

20 June 2020

blitzorodeo I got new riding boots!! My horse coupon 2.0 picked them out for me! :0) BT dubs, i changed my horses’ name to coupon 2.0

megan25gothiqueimmortel Youre awesome like always Blitzy blitzorodeo @megan25gothiqueimmortel 😍😍😍 yes i am good thanks 😋💖💕❤️

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Blitzō (@blitzorodeo) on Jun 20, 2020 at 1:40am PDT

blitzorodeo

Watching my favorite movie with my horse!!

#movienight🥺 #spiritismyfavmovie

blitzorodeo Maxipad and i can’t get enough of these lil iced bitches 🥰😛😋 BTdubs i renamed my horse to maxipad dont flame me 🔥🔥🔥 #icedcofee #mmmmiloveicedcoffee #donttslktomebeforeihavemycoffree

markzillow655 I feel like Blitz put some drugs in that drink blitzorodeo @markzillow655 its just iced coffee 😬

janegumball What name is on your horse’s birth certificate? blitzorodeo @janegumball 😳 thats a secret 😗❤️

watsurdamage dont tslk to me before i have my coffree probablyfakeblonde @watsurdamage leave him alone, he just wants to enjoy time with his horse watsurdamage @probablyfakeblonde what horse blitzorodeo @probablyfakeblonde 😔

21 June 2020

blitzorodeo WENT TO THE MOOOOVVVIIIEEESSSS!! 🥴 it was lame, no horses in this movie 😑👎 it suuuuxxxxxxx!!! Anyways my horses new name is nail polish #moxxiehasstinyPP #iatrtheirpopcorm #illreviewthrmovielater

lordskelecat Pics of the horse or it doesn’t exist blitzorodeo @lordskelecat YOU CANT JUST ASK FOR PICS OF MY HORSE!!! DONT FLAME ME!!! 🔥🔥🔥

blitzorodeo Throw back to last years halloween costume!!! My horse Latex glove said i should post it :0) Oh yea my horses new name is latex glove #iusedlotsofmakeuponmyhorns #andotherplaces;) #donthugmeillloosemymakeuponyou

akira282006 Isn't it in those clothes that blitzo appears in a Hazbin hotel scene?. By the way great costume👌 blitzorodeo @akira282006 i had to look fancy at the stufio 😎

markzillow655 That is awesome looking ngl blitzorodeo @markzillow655 😎🔥

22 June 2020

blitzorodeo My horse and i found this in Moxxies closet! LOOOL!!! Im pretty sure moxxie cant pull it off like Tupperware can. My horses new name is tupperware BTW🥺😎👍❤️ #bigdickenergyproblemslol #myjorsesnsmeistupperware #stolaseatmyass

radio_demon_husk He wouldn’t know about virginity after all he did sleep with stolas blitzorodeo @radio_demon_husk who the fuck is stolas

yaelgilbert He low-key kinda hot tho. blitzorodeo @yaelgilbert 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎

blitzorodeo GOD DAMN IT!! They gave me fucking HOT COFFEE!! 👿🔥 this is bullshit im about to to full karen on their asses!! BTdubs, my horses name is ICED COFFEE WHICH IS WHAT I WANTED!!! #bullshitbullshitbullshitbullshitbullshitbullshit!!!!

hellishgirly34 Do you like Moxxie xD? Spit the tea! blitzorodeo @licoholics nah he’s stinky.

23 June 2020

blitzorodeo Having my hotdog that my horse recommended. This guy wont stop talking to me. I changed my horses name to keystroke #thightuesday❤️😈 #hotdogtimeisagoodtime

yaelgilbert You gonna slurp that mustered off your lap or can I? blitzorodeo @yaelgilbert I want a happy meal first

blitzorodeo In a meeting rn, i love these filters LOL! My horse chose this filter :0) Their name is now snimmer~ #moxxieisatotalbabe #thattaghas100+onit #proovesmoxxieisbaby #:)😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈

janegumball Snimmer is a dumb name 👎 blitzorodeo @janegumball 🔥👿👎🔥

blitzorodeo Feeling cute today, calling my horse on an old clamshell phone! 😈❤️🌟#foundthisoldshotinaboxlol #missusingmyclalmshells

daddy_hoothoot My eyes have been blessed to see my dear Blitzy like this! You’re always so adorable.

bryan_fedrix what's the horse's name now? blitzorodeo @bryan_fedrix THANK YOU FOR ASKING, the name is shrinkwrap

25 June 2020

daddy_hoothoot Octavia said I needed an instagram account and surprised me this morning. Am I doing this right? #nofilter #wokeuplikethis

blitzorodeo 👎 daddy_hoothoot @blitzorodeo Oh, Blitzy, you know you love seeing this in the morning❤️❤️❤️ blitzorodeo @daddy_hoothoot 😔 not a horse

blitzorodeo 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

edwar_17_art Birb father daddy_hoothoot @edwar_17_art I’m not quite sure what a “birb” is but I am indeed a father. And a very proud one at that.

boiled_trash Daddy hoot hoot? Can you be my daddy~? daddy_hoothoot @boiled_trash I’m sorry, I already have a daughter

blitzorodeo Stolas came over and asked for my horse cook but snowcone (my horse) isn’t interested. 🥴👿😑

blitzorodeo BTW my horse is a master chef 🔥

daddy_hoothoot My, what a lovely pair of legs those are!

blitzorodeo At the pool with my horse! We both have pool floaties we stole from some kid together 🥺🔥😈

daddy_hoothoot Oh! You’re in the pool? blitzorodeo @daddy_hoothoot ................................. no........................... boiled_trash @karlaanimatesyt stolas is bout to join him karlaanimatesyt @boiled_trash Not it I get there first and stop him! 🤠 It’s our job to protect blitzo >:0!! blitzorodeo @karlaanimatesyt finally i have a human shield jaquiialeworld @daddy_hoothoot Stolas, I know how to make blitzo surrender to you, give him a horse blitzorodeo @jaquiialeworld i already have a horse 👎

wolf.nerd.geek Also Blitzo is so cute that face he is making can you send me a link to this pic please blitzorodeo @wolf.nerd.geek this is my selfie 😑🔥

thorns521 How do you feel about Stolas’s new account Blitzø? blitzorodeo @thorns521 I can never post a thigh pic again... daddy_hoothoot @blitzorodeo Don’t let me get in the way of you showing the world those hot thighs 😉

vinfer8 Who took the picture? 🤔 blitzorodeo @vinfer8 obviously my horse

boiled_trash What does your horse’s pool float look like? blitzorodeo @boiled_trash looks like a dragon 🐉

karlaanimatesyt Wow.... :0 What’s your horses name today? :D I’m interested!! blitzorodeo @karlaanimatesyt pool noodle 😎

nightmurr 🥺💕 you have such a cute little smile i- blitzorodeo @nightmurr 😎

princess_.ee Whats your horses name? blitzorodeo @princess_.ee FINALLY SOMEONE ASSKKED. Its Noodle, pool noodle

26 June 2020

daddy_hoothoot I spy a cutie 😈🥰 @blitzorodeo

pipunpkin i spy a SIMP daddy_hoothoot @pipunpkin If a “SIMP” means Sexy Imp then yes

watsurdamage Suspiciously with no horse... 👀 blitzorodeo @watsurdamage he went to use the bathroom obviously watsurdamage @blitzorodeo obviously boiled_trash @blitzorodeo where’s his pool float then??? watsurdamage @boiled_trash @blitzorodeo I think they’ve got you there blitz daddy_hoothoot @watsurdamage no one needs to pick on my Blitzy. If he says there was a horse there, there was a horse there.

blitzorodeo New icon fr da newme (My horse, typo, wrote that for me)

daddy_hoothoot 😘

maro.drawings blitzo your photos are always beautiful 👌💖 but I need to ask you something .... how much does a domicile murder cost? blitzorodeo @maro.drawings you have to get a consultation if you want a priiicceeeee 🔥

blitzorodeo So.. Remember, bushes are great places to hide... my horse, dixxie cup, hid in the bush next to me #hidingforgoodreasonslol #itskindafunnybutalsonotbecauseimstuckinabush #updatelateronthebushsituation

daddy_hoothoot Oh dear

janegumball Dixie Cup is a dumb dumb name 👎 horse name 0/10 blitzorodeo @janegumball DONT FLAME MEEEEE!!!!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥

sirnasteryg87 is your horse okay? (´；д；`) blitzorodeo @sirnasteryg87 dixie cup is doin just fine, were both hiding in the

27 June 2020

blitzorodeo ok update, I was able to escape the bushes and I got an iced coffee, I'm fine looooool. My horse (named latex glove) also got one too. I think we'll come here more often to get coffeeeee #tastyasfuckman #iloveicedcoffeeitstasty

daddy_hoothoot Hope you’re enjoying the living world, Blitzy! Can’t wait to see you when you get back! blitzorodeo @daddy_hoothoot yea yea....

maichyartnoodles You look like you are doing an Ahegao, wtf?! blitzorodeo @maichyartnoodles weeb

thesydinator Just add some beta blockers with that iced coffee, and bam: you’re completely hammered blitzorodeo @thesydinator now THAT sounds like an idea 😎😎😍😍

ant_arts_entertainment I love horses blitzorodeo @ant_arts_entertainment this guy gets me

king_leb72 Damn why were you in the bushes blitzorodeo @king_leb72 i have my motives, im a pro

blitzorodeo This is the piñata that reminded me of moxxie LOL. Tortilla chip (my horse) said to give it to mills, I think she’d love it 🤣😈

daddy_hoothoot It’s cute but not quite as cute as a certain imp I know 😏 😈 angelmadefromhell @daddy_hoothoot Moxxie? daddy_hoothoot @angelmadefromhell Which one of the little ones are they? blitzorodeo @daddy_hoothoot Just remember our agreement and you can call me whatever you want... ill see you at 8 daddy_hoothoot @blitzorodeo Can’t wait! 😘

janegumball You took my name suggestion. If you change it again I’m afraid I’m gonna have to report your account. blitzorodeo @janegumball wtffff!!!!!

daddy_hoothoot Had myself a bit of a spook. Still not quite used to this phone. #dadprobs 🦉

blitzorodeo Use a filter daddy_hoothoot @blitzorodeo I’ll keep that in mind for next time

hellishgirly34 Stolas, why Blitzo was hiding in a bush? daddy_hoothoot @bluepatata I’m not quite sure. I tried to call him but he didn’t pick up.

daddy_hoothoot Got to spend the day with Octavia. 💖🖤#prouddad #saturdaysaremadefordads

ballora_x Wait, I have a good question, how can you're daughter hear everything in the Headsets wale she doesn't have ears? daddy_hoothoot @ballora_x we’re in Hell, dear. Living world logic doesn’t apply.

ricardo_silis_garcia_ I came to ask for your daughter's hand daddy_hoothoot @ricardo_silis_garcia_ not my hand to give. Besides she’s far too young for matrimony.

28 June 2020

blitzorodeo I drew a picture of msyulef as a horse :) im such a a creative guy!! my given horse name from my horse (Renamed to flavor dust) is blitzo2. if you translate it it's whIIIINNENEEE nay bRRRRRR HEEERRGH. #whatsyourhorsiename #stolasdontotinteract

blitzorodeo Im such a good artist boiled_trash @blitzorodeo you’re not a good artist, you’re an amazing one! blitzorodeo @boiled_trash 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍YOURE 👏 RIGHT👏👏👏

daddy_hoothoot You’re always so talented with your hands, Blitzy!

sugar.weaver My horse name is Tiny Whore - or Horse... I'm not fluent yet and they're pretty similar sounds... In horse that's PBBBF.. NNNEEHHHHHEH BPFF! BPFF! (The exclamation points are important to the translation) blitzorodeo @sugar.weaver i liked this 3 times. Your horse name is perfect PBBBF NNNNNEEEHHHEH BPPFF BPFFF, fucking amazing sugar.weaver @blitzorodeo Thank you so much, whIIIIINNENEEE nay bRRRRRR HEEERRGH, but you forgot my exclamation points and called me Clammy Ankles 😔😔😔 blitzorodeo @sugar.weaver i was being informal but ill remember next time 😔

momgimmeoreo How did you learn how to draw, Blitz? blitzorodeo @momgimmeoreo im just talented

beetle.ghosts omg you're so talented blitzorodeo @beetle.ghosts ❤️❤️❤️😍❤️😍❤️❤️❤️😍😍❤️❤️😍😍

andonijean Oh wow! This is a piece of art! I'll give you one hundred of apples for it~ blitzorodeo @andonijean WOW GIMMUE APPLE

aateabee Gosh, I wish my art was as good as yours, Blitzo. I feel unworthy when I look at your art. blitzorodeo @aateabee ❤️😎❤️😎❤️😎❤️😎❤️😎😎😎

aitesound666 I Love you art，will you draw moxxie as a horse? blitzorodeo @aitesound666 i should....!!!!!

karlaanimatesyt Blitzo! >:0 I LOVE YOUR ART, YOU ARE SUCH A GODDESS! Will you ever do more art? :D I would love to see some more! blitzorodeo @karlaanimatesyt wow.... yes... ill post more art 😍😍❤️😍❤️

boiled_trash Love your art, Blitzo! Have you considered doing commissions? blitzorodeo @boiled_trash im thinjing of opening them soon :)

kaldraws8280 Oh you should hang it on moxxies fridge! I bet hed love it! blitzorodeo @kaldraws8280 hed better....

leoleochleoleo you draw yourself as a horse because you like to lay on your fours for the old owl 7u7? blitzorodeo @leoleochleoleo FIRST OF ALL. Im a top, and second, i draw myself as a horse because its my SPIRIT animal >:(

blitzorodeo Some requests!! You guys really like my art 😋 i worked really hard on moxxies horsiebdrawing. He doesnt HAVE a horse name. Its just moxxie. My red crayon ran out i only had blue dont flame me preps

daddy_hoothoot 💖💖💖💖💖💖🥺!!! blitzorodeo @daddy_hoothoot its from that time you choked on a rat bone 🦴 daddy_hoothoot @blitzorodeo I still absolutely adore it! daddy_hoothoot @blitzorodeo There’s only one bone I enjoy choking on 😏 blitzorodeo @daddy_hoothoot STOLAS

megadoomed Do you take constructive criticism blitzorodeo @megadoomed no

nightmurr AN ART GOD 😳😳 blitzorodeo @nightmurr 😎🔥 i am really good at art

aitesound666 I think you deserve this 🙌🙌👏👏👏 blitzorodeo @aitesound666 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

useful.crew.too Your drawings and pictures bring me such joy!! blitzorodeo @useful.crew.too 😍❤️

mr_unknown15632 Your art work is amazing not gonna lie, the second drawing looks exactly like moxxie blitzorodeo @mr_unknown15632 doesnt it??????? 🙌🙌🙌

whereareallmyenchiladas honestly at this point put “artist” in ur bio🥺 ur art is way too good to not be recognized blitzorodeo @whereareallmyenchiladas so right

29 June 2020

blitzorodeo My horse, who i renamed to smart phone, said I should wear sunglasses. I trust my horses opinion :} #sunglassesonfunsout #ifuckinglovewearingsunglassesyoucantseewhatimthinking #galaxybrainzriseup

bootyprince damn u single bb? blitzorodeo @bootyprince always up for a good time 😎

aateabee Where’d you get the glasses from? I’d really like a pair like that! blitzorodeo @aateabee at my local sunglasses hut

blitzorodeo stolas sent me this picture earlier... not sure what he was trying to do but i think the camera went off after he posed.

daddy_hoothoot Oh! This is embarrassing. blitzorodeo @daddy_hoothoot 🤧

bootyprince send him one back blitzorodeo @bootyprince maybe i will....... blitzorodeo @blitzorodeo NOT daddy_hoothoot @blitzorodeo 🥺

blitzorodeo just saw Antz... Z reminds me WAAYYY too much of Moxxie... #pleaseshutuppleaseshutup

daddy_hoothoot I always feel amazing after a good preening 🦉❤️ #fluffyisthebest

blitzorodeo I came back for my left glove thats all 🔥🔥 daddy_hoothoot @blitzorodeo If you want to come by for the other one, we can watch one of those horse movies you enjoy 🐴

blitzorodeo @daddy_hoothoot ............... spirit........ ill bring my VHS but NOTHING FUNNY daddy_hoothoot @blitzorodeo I’ll get popcorn!

30 June 2020

daddy_hoothoot Movie night with Blitzy! 😈🦉🍿

blitzorodeo SPIRIT IS A VERY EMOTIONAL MOVIE

deparkjimin COUPLE GOALS.! They should get married now.❤️❤️❤️ blitzorodeo @deparkjimin we are NOT A couple! saquesealchingada @blitzorodeo That's what everyone says, what do you say Stolas? daddy_hoothoot @saquesealchingada I... It’s complicated

leoleochleoleo I thought that old man didn't know how to use netflix 0: daddy_hoothoot @leoleochleoleo Blitzy brought a VHS

mistress_of_insanity Are ya watchin' porn or somethin'? 👀🔥 blitzorodeo @mistress_of_insanity 👎👎👎👎👎 NO ITS SPIRIT

natycolrange OhHH we can Finaly see the Horse!! 🌟🌟 blitzorodeo @natycolrange its just a horse figurine, my horse went to the shitter

blitzorodeo I went to Mcdonalds and Mccucked this human womans wife lol. My horse said it was my charms and my daddy fingers. too bad I'm wild and free babybeeee #ihadamcflurryandlarrrggeeefries #cantfuckintamemeimfree #likespiritthehorse

daddy_hoothoot Oh...

trysteropup Need an imp with daddy fingers in my life blitzorodeo @trysteropup this is my absolute favorite comment

mr_unknown15632 My main question is, what’s your horses name? blitzorodeo @mr_unknown15632 THANK YIU FOR ASKINGGGG!!! Thr name is flame proof, cuz nobody can burn this biatch

hat_flap Hey Daddy Finger blitzorodeo @hat_flap hey baby maker

yaelgilbert At least return her horse frame to her. blitzorodeo @yaelgilbert NO.

probablyfakeblonde STOP STEALING MY SHIT!!! YOULL NEVER BE LIKE SPIRIT blitzorodeo @probablyfakeblonde DONT FLAME ME JUST CUZ I HAVE DADDY FINGERS AND YOU DONT! watsurdamage @blitzorodeo @probablyfakeblonde I mean he’s right blitzorodeo @watsurdamage @probablyfakeblonde cucked again probablyfakeblonde @watsurdamage @blitzorodeo honey please don’t do this, he’s already stolen my beautiful framed horse picture, I can’t lose you too 🥺 blitzorodeo @probablyfakeblonde its mine now, and im wild and free, cant tame me watsurdamage @blitzorodeo @probablyfakeblonde you heard him, like Miley he can’t be tamed

daddy_hoothoot A pleasant afternoon tea with my wife 😢

daddy_hoothoot Sorry, I meant to put 😌

aitesound666 Ok，a question。Who took the picture?😮 daddy_hoothoot @aitesound666 Butler

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Blitzō (@blitzorodeo) on Jun 30, 2020 at 1:46am PDT

blitzorodeo I tried animating and it’s sucks

janegumball Everyone in the comments is trying to spare your feelings, and you know it blitzorodeo @janegumball i think ur just jealous thet im amazing

blitzorodeo Loonie and I went out to the city! my horse Dominator got us there! :) #horseinthecityha #betterthanataxiiii #itfuckinfreeeee

daddy_hoothoot How cute, Blitzy! Perhaps someday we can arrange a little play date. I think our daughters would very much enjoy it. blitzorodeo @daddy_hoothoot Loona might be a little too old to do play dates.. daddy_hoothoot @blitzorodeo it’s more of an expression than an actual play date, Blitzy. I simply think they may get along.

bootyprince she looks just like u blitzorodeo @bootyprince the resemblance is uncanine

And that’s all the June posts!!

So! Since this is the first Voxtagram post, lemme include the big ol’ disclaimer that’s going to apply to all of these posts: we don’t yet know how canon these accounts are.

This is why they’re broadly accepted as canon: as far as I have been able to track back (correct me if you know better & have a source!), the first of these accounts, Blitzo’s, was found by fans because Vivzie followed it when it was brand new. Since then, new accounts have been discovered as they follow/interact with each other. Some official artists have interacted “in character” with the accounts. The accounts accurately announced when the “Addict” music video was going to come out, and some art posted before “Addict” used imagery that was also used in the music video. So either the accounts are definitely made by the canon creators or else being made by somebody who’s got inside access to the creators.

But, as far as I have seen, nobody on the Hazbin crew has taken credit for running them. More importantly, nobody has said how canon the blogs are. Maybe every image/word posted by these accounts is 100% accurate/canonical; or maybe the art is canon but the roleplaying in the comments is noncanon goofy fanservice; etc. We don’t know yet. It appears safest to say these accounts are probably mostly canon—but take it with a grain of salt.

So until we’re directly informed how canon the Voxtagram accounts are, Voxtagram posts are going to be tagged “#semi canon” (the same tag I’ll be using for stream transcripts) to indicate that it appears to be info coming from the creators, but it may or may not still be canon/accurate by the time the full shows and comics are released.

[macklives]

homestuck recap

i hated this so fucking much bc my 2 am bitch-ass didnt want to read a recap thats probably longer than any slowburn out there

anyways here it is

also, uhhH sorry im using this as a end of session discussion bc that shit gets explained in her as well. and im not writing up more recaps of a recap so this is where im done for the day. (by done for the day i mean last nights session, im still doing a liveblog soon. i just wrote this yesterday)

also that this is long

you dont have to read it, theres nothing of importance

ive been coping with humor to get me through it

neato.

have fun with what i suffered through:

why was “beta” the only thing unhighlighted?

like did i miss a page???

OH its the beta version of HS thats why

damn its like 5 pages and thats it

mmh

well youll all be happy to know im clicking every single one of these links again bc i like looking back like ahh i remember that. good times. also in case i forgot some shit existed.

do you think andrew had fun writing this? or was he like “fuck”

thats a lot of fucking package talk. good thing im not confused as of now and remember it pretty clearly. of else, this early on in the recap, id be screwed.

god remember when i did an analysis on each item and what it did

i feel as if i have the technology engrained inside my head right now

cruxite, alchemeter, all that jazz

flashbacks are starting up already

yeah, that was the good part in homestuck where i knew 100% that i probably would continue on this liveblog in its entirety, ngl

that one explosion scene. bc it kept me going.

OH W A IT SHIT

i just realized how the intermission spades probably fucking foreshadowed the whole jack revolts thing and gains the ring, which was also technically JOHNS fault considering he slashed up the doll in the first place

my god, i guess thats the only good aspect of the recap. looking back at things and realizing the missing pieces.

oh that makes sense for the whole “this prototyping had no effect on the enemies, since he was already in the medium” i didnt actually think about that

little did rose know where that would get her right now

oh yeah

there’s still the whole entire lab terminal thing and how mom basically knows the place exists. i guess we’re still venturing onto that and itll come up later when we find out how mom knows SO MUCH about the game.

still think shes some weird spy or secret agent

i kinda love her ngl

anyways, theres literally no reason for skaia to produce a cloning machine. so technically, they only sent the meteors in, right? so who put the cloning machine in if not mom?

oh yeah that impact was nerve wrecking asf

and still at this point in the comic i called dave fuckboy red

huh, how times change

i hated reading that whole paragraph ngl, the frustration just kicked me in the boobs again

yeah nobody else got tornadoes, huh?

OH that makes also much more sense

bc she did prototyped them before she entered the medium.

i gotcha

man one of my favorite edits i made, rose hitting that meteor with a bat

are you

telling me

the exiles structures they arrived on were in the form of the items the kids used to enter the medium?

THE EGG

THAT EXPLAINS “EGG”

of course it was 413 years ago. that was never explained. simply vague “many years in the future....” but i expected no less from this

man serenity is the most wholesome character in hs no doubt

damn thought andy here was really gonna spoil us jade’s planet

okay cool, im glad i now have the layout to the whole “their stations went to the coordinates of the home button” shindig

man i honestly dont know what else to say besides “yeah cool recap” when i already pretty much know what went down? ofc im looking into each link and shit and adding in things when i see fit, but otherwise its just me going “ah good times” yknow

the whole meteor thing kinda makes sense now?

we’re still missing a few pieces of info but we’re getting there, folks

oh yeah that reveal

god jade and dave have it in the shits for parents huh

bro isnt the best and jade has a fucking dog

who lowkey

is doing better than bro

who knew a fucking dog is a better guardian than bro lmfao

dreambot = terminator. im telling you.

sorry im still on that idea and it will never leave unless i have the actual proof in front of me that its not going to become a thing. meaning, ive finished hs and theres still no terminator dreambot or either andrew himself gives me a canon letter with “the robot is not arnold, mackenzie, pls just let it be”

why is the entire game session highlighted

i swear to god if this is like to a second recap or smth of the whole game session i may fucking CRY

okay thank god its just a design of the skaia layout

which is honestly cool

idk why its blurry tho but i can at least see the layout now. which is honestly how i pictured it anyways.

yeah, john did make a huge impact in his friends’ life and i find that so fucking touching

yep. got that. everything loops around. cool.

especially when the trolls come in. god we havent even gotten to that recap portion yet, we havent even gotten to the INTERMISSION

pls can this be the halfway point to the recap

AT LEAST

so they were exiled after the whole jack: ascend thing, right? considering theyre way in the future. man no fucking wonder.

speaking of jack

man that whole dad and jack interaction was gold, ngl

OH THAT EXPLAINS THE RING THEN

and wow, andrew’s really giving us the best female content huh. andrew is the true god of equality and diversity.

also hey, i didnt realize that wow. so PM tricked the queen in showing the parking ticket to be able to take the present from jack. she’s a smart cookie, that one..

she and PM basically snitched on jack and it was the best thing that has happened to me so far

oh yeah okay

but why did AR panic over bec? bc thats something we havent learned yet, right?

anyways

exile town, the only town which should exist. facts. i dont make the rules.

noice

i love PM being queen. like.. thats canon now. shes an actual queen.

yeah that was a fun game and the consorts were cute

fuck yeah the dick head

hate them even more now that i know john was killed because of them

anyways, i wonder what dick move dave’s denizen did? maybe thats why its filled with lava bc the denizen was like “fuck it. make the land red. kill them all”

UH WHAT

WHAT

OH MY GOD HOW DID I JUST FORGET NANNAS LETTER LIKE THAT LMFAO

THEIR TITLES WERE THERE THE WHOLE TIME!

so i still dont know what they mean but i can gather it has something to do with the game giving them abilities. considering dave is the “knight of time” and he can go back in time. whack.

which means john can either control someones breathing or simply wind. and rose is... like that one girl in the winx club who does the sun shit. bc whenever i think of light powers, i think of stella.

and jade is space. witch of space.

nice

i have no idea what that means ngl

okay finally

we’re at the trolls

maybe this recap will end soon

i remember when i thought they were internet bullies

yesss

someone asked if i basically knew the trolls were on a different veil than the kids, so not presently with them, and i know lol. i was making a joke before btw. jsyk. dont think im incompetent to forget these things when sometimes i choose to forget it so i can add in a joke

it be like that, i annoy many

then again, pls dont assume im trying to say im not incompetent bc im also a fucking dumbass and DO forget shit and i have no excuse

imagine being so bored on the meteor, your last resort is speaking to aliens

ngl me if i was ever trapped on a meteor and could potentially do that

nah ik its bc its their only hope at helping with their session or whatever tf CG said to john. but there was BOUND to be a conference meeting between them like “okay guys. humans. that needs to be sorted out” and you just hear CG screaming in the background

i cant wait to meet them honestly bc im growing on all 4 of the ones we’ve seen already. and on top of that, i know what they look like and i know theyre not THAT bad, just a little on the crayy zee side sometimes

but theyre trying

OH MY GOD

I GET IT

FUCK

DOES THAT MEAN THE INTERMISSION IS *APART* OF THE MAIN FUCKING STORY??

AND SPADES IS WV FOR THE TROLLS

GOD D A M N

wow

i didnt expect that. but maybe the signs were there and i was just willingly choosing to ignore it or smth bc “haha couldnt be, right”

flashbacks to how i thought the trolls were humans

anyways, i guess he got his revenge on the kids version of “snowman” ie the black queen. but really

he did not have to do that. he could have cut off the finger and fled. but he decided “nah, lets implode her” so the loml is dead and all i got was a catchy song

i knew they were different types of “bullies” but now i just have to replace bullies with uhh

trolling strategies

anyways, this is cute. i love how they’ve come to be friends through mutual frustration. good part in the comic.

i wonder why it explodes

more importantly

....

terminator time?

this was my favourite sequences of dialogues in the whole entirety of homestuck. that is to say the back and forth thing that the kids went through to become a sort of wingman for the other.

absolutely gold.

all except AT’s rap.

GC was the only smart one with the linear shit

anyways fuck he still has to kill the denizen now but apparently its hard to beat for a sleeping dick head so

that will be fun for the future

john will probably need to kill A LOT of imps to get there

yeah rose is a badass bc she slayed that thing with needles of all things

OH and the white queen was the cursive

damn did AR ever do the whole guide process to a kid yet? maybe he will with dave, idk

oHHH

i fucking SEE

thats why he said DNA

to use it and replace all the life forms in the ocean

fucking neat wow

man that sounded sarcastic but im genuinely impressed bc all i got was bullshit as i read jaspersprites log

so thats the secret. it was “meow” bc that somehow translates to the genetic code she needs then. and that code apparently took fucking years to write as well. sick. whack. oh man.

derse is very pretty, ngl

and wow shit

“dave had already been awake in his tower all along without realizing it” how tf does someone just

do that, awake in both places at once

i didnt even fucking realize that fact as i read that pesterlog wow

ah yes, around the time things got confusing

okay so the capsule makes sense bc at first i didnt know it was a fucking time capsule so i got confused as to how it just apparated the game lmfao

the more you know i guess *twinkle*

i find that a neat concept tho

like the whole whatever you prototype affects the imps and shit

yeah so that whole “he had no advice” basically impacted his future

no shit dave wanted to reset things bc he probably thought he caused some sort of bad butterfly effect and killed his best friend

fuck calsprite thats all im gonna say

i read that first sentence and i think i got an aneurysm

and then everything else just made me sad again

i mean good thing he fucking did amirite?

we got pain at first but now we got cool shit like idk

fucking DAVESPRITE

damn idk how that works

will rose have like two minds now? or will this be some steven universe fusion shit?

“and understood their meaning” course well i fucking didnt so could you pls elaborate, rose?

okay but then what the fuck did he use that was inside the fucking box

bc i thought he used his knife?

im only every going to refer him as that now, thank you andrew

alright okay..

god that was a lot

i dont know what will happen once i click on those links but i am going to see that for myself bc i refuse to add ANYTHING ELSE