#the traumagenic community is full of systems who hate their existence and wish they were singlets

[multiplicity-positivity]

Here’s some positivity for systems with trauma due to syscourse!

It is very sad that system discourse, which should be a way for systems of all sorts to come together to learn and come to better understandings about one another, is often filled with hate, harassment, ignorance, and vitriol. It’s not fair that so many systems are attacked for simply existing or wanting to talk and learn more about plurality from systems of different backgrounds. Our own system has been traumatized by syscoursers, and we know firsthand what it’s like to be severely harmed by those who claim to engage in civil system discussion. So here’s to all the systems who have been traumatized by syscourse!

Are you an endogenic system who has been harmed by others constantly fakeclaiming you and dismissing your experience? We want to let you know that we see you, we believe you, and we will never call your validity into question! You deserve kindness and gentleness, and the full understanding that you are a real and integral part of the plural community just the way you are!

Are you a system who has been harassed due to simply believing that systems of all origins are real? If so, we are so very sorry that you have faced harassment for allowing other people to define their own experiences. Know that it is actually healthy and beneficial to listen to and support systems of different backgrounds and experiences, and we are so very proud of you!

Are you a traumatized system who has had your trauma history questioned or invalidated due to your syscourse stance? We’d like to remind you that people online cannot and do not know you or your personal history better than you yourself. Your trauma is real, and no amount of people online claiming otherwise can change that! You deserve peace, rest, and recovery, no matter what your views on syscourse are.

Are you a system who was forced to recall your trauma too early due to syscoursers online? If so, we’d like to offer you our deepest condolences. No one should ever be forced to recall painful memories in order to be treated with respect and compassion in online spaces. Please know that the fact that you actually do have trauma does not justify others forcing you to dredge up aspects of your past that you were not ready to come to terms with yet!

Are you a system who became mixed origins or partially traumagenic due to being traumatized by syscourse? If you are, please remember that the trauma you went through is absolutely not your fault. Your system was real even before the trauma you faced, and we truly hope that you can access the support and resources you need in order to begin your healing process.

Are you a system who has been doxxed, harassed, threatened, or encouraged to commit suicide or self harm due to your involvement in syscourse? We’d like to let you know that our heart goes out to you. It’s not fair that you were treated in this way and traumatized due to trying to engage in system discourse. No one, under any circumstances, deserves to be treated in this way! We wish for you comfort and rest surrounded by people who care about you.

Regardless of what your system looks like, how you identify, what your syscourse stance is, or how regularly you engage in syscourse, absolutely no one deserves to be traumatized for what they believe in and how they express themselves. We genuinely wish that every system who has been traumatized by syscourse can find hope, peace, comfort, and recovery in their future. Please know that we care about you, we’re rooting for you, and we’re wishing you the very best in all that you do!

[the80srewinders]

part two.

your hate seems misplaced. you feared anti-endos and what they say, you feared that they might call you a faker. the fear that your trauma might not be enough is completely valid when anti-endos refuse to acknowledge those without it. it seems that you overcame that and now you fully realise what type of system you're in and the reasoning behind why it is like that (congratulations! understanding your own nature is often difficult, but you managed to do it. good job. /genuine).

now you realise how endos feel, right? they fear not being "plural enough" because their origins are not the same as yours. i know what you feel when you say that you're jealous. skip to the start if the next paragraph, please, if you don't want to read about my experience as a member of a system with unknown origins and about my relationship with trauma. [|||] i was jealous of those like you. when i doubted our identity, i wished we had trauma more severe than what we already have. silly, isn't it? why on earth would you wish for that? because i never felt like we were enough to be actually plural. i wished that our dissociation was more severe and we switched more often because i never thought we had enough proof to be called a system. i would even say this obsessive thought made me abusive towards my headmates and i take full responsibility for that. i was bad. still am to some degree. i still feel like all this would be better if our life was even worse than it already is, more full of trauma. at least then we would be sure.

so what is the reason you hate endos? i can't understand. because they weren't traumatised? because they are perfect, happy systems with good communication? but that's not how it always is, is it. some endos are traumatised. some of them are dysfunctional. some suffer from things that come with their plurality. not all of them, of course, but so are not all traumagenic systems actively suffer for the same reasons. and while it may seem unfair that thir plurality doesn't stem from trauma, it's just how it turned out to be.

there are "perfect" systems, of course. but they want to exist in peace like we all do. they've done nothing to deserve your hate. maybe one day your system will be functional, with great communication, with positive relationships between your system's members, including you. but hate doesn't help with healing.

hope this helps! :D

P.S.: sorry if my words seem incoherent in some places, headache is killing me. casting Something Good Will Happen Soon spell on you, have a great morning/day/evening/night!

- B-a

first, I'd like to say I relate to the "I feel like my trauma isn't enough, I don't switch enough, I don't dissociate enough, I wish I had more severe trauma" thing, but that itself is a trauma response. it's a clear example of how people can think they're endogenic, when they are actually an OSDD system or a did system that doesn't fit the stereotype of the most horrific abuse as a small child or switching every five seconds. there's so much misinformation, which I will admit plenty of anti endos help spread, caused by symptom exaggeration.

I've been on both sides- I've wanted more trauma just to feel valid, and I've wished I had none so I could be the "perfect and cool" collective. so I relate to what you're saying.

again, I realize some endos have struggles similar to those with DID/osdd. I'm not doubting that endos are human; even though I don't like what most of the endo community has done, and it's impossible to have headmates without trauma, I still care about endos as humans. I don't hate them per se; I just hate their actions.

personally, I believe most endos have DID/OSDD but are in denial because of the toxic anti endos who make high standards for what a "real" did/OSDD system does and exaggerate their own symptoms. not all anti endos are like that, but I feel like that's why because endos are so hostile to anti endos.

you have your opinion, and I have mine. I respect yours even if I don't agree, and I hope you can respect mine. at least you're more civil than most endos we've had in our asks, and wishing you a great day too. that was actually mature of you and it's well appreciated.