#the top one was because the sun was coming through the peephole at just the right angle

[constantlyfalling]

rainbow walls

[sungbeam]

𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐰 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧

nonidol!choi san x gn!reader (no prns mentioned)

turns out your upstairs neighbor has a cat who adores climbing through your window — oh, and said neighbor is also fine as hell.

3.7k words, neighbors au (2 lovers), fluff, maybe like two swear words, drinking, lots of mentions of food

a/n: low-key just read this like ur watching the highlight reel of a romcom lol but @jaehunnyy for u 💖 i hope u like it :'))

It all started about seven months ago when a gorgeous Thai cat waltzed into your apartment via the open window. It was a late July afternoon, stiflingly hot and sticky, meaning you had your window opened and the mobile fan set up to blow cool air into the apartment.

You were, for once, not at work. Because the art museum you worked at downtown was currently undergoing reconstruction, you were stuck in your apartment trying (failing) to sell prints off your low-traffic Etsy shop while also trying (failing) to make popsicles.

“Why is this so complicated?” You grumbled aloud as you sat on top of your kitchen counter with your knees pulled beneath your chin. You scrolled down the recipe again on your laptop screen, nose wrinkled at the amount of convoluted steps listed. “Too fancy,” you decided, slamming your laptop lid closed.

Immediately, you hissed, lifting the lid to make sure you hadn't cracked the screen from closing it too hard. Thankfully, there were no cracks visible and you breathed out a sigh of relief. You could not afford a broken—

“Holy shit!” You nearly fell off the back of the island counter at the sight of a light gray cat with black tipped ears, paws, and tail seated on the floor before you.

The cat meowed an innocent greeting.

You pressed your hand to your hammering heart and shifted to get a grip on your position atop the counter. “How—? Where…?” Your eyes drifted to the open window.

Oh. Well, that would explain it.

You glanced back at the cat, who peered up at you once more. “Meow.”

Carefully, you climbed down from the counter as to not scare the creature with any sudden movements. “Hey, baby. Where did you come from, hm?” You cooed, extending your hand out as an offer to be sniffed.

The cat unfurled its tail out from around its body and crept toward your hand. With an experimental sniff, you were deemed safe, and the cat rubbed the side of its face affectionately against the back of your knuckles.

Your chest nearly exploded from the cute interaction. You lowered yourself to your knees, gently taking a peek at the silver charm attached around the collar. There you found the engraving of a star in the metal circle.

“I'm guessing this has something to do with your name?” You hummed, reaching up to scratch the feline behind the ears and head. At least you had an inkling that this little one belonged to someone. You just didn't know how to find out who they were.

“I guess you can hang out with me,” you sighed and stood up with your hands on your hips. You didn't mind the company, after all, and maybe this could be a point of inspiration.

About three hours later, the summer sun still hung relatively high in the sky and you were trying to figure out what to feed the cat when there came a sudden knock at your front door. Really, the “sudden knock” was a series of rushed, panicked DUDUDUDU sounds. You nearly jumped out of your skin for the second time in one afternoon, and even the cat seemed to leap.

Well, the cat only looked mildly annoyed that her nap was interrupted, but she seemed content to give a languid stretch and join you in seeing who was so alarmed at your door.

When you peered out the peephole, your eyes shot open.

There was a pretty man at your door.

You glanced down at the cat who looked back up at you. You mouthed to her, pointing at the door, ‘Do you know this guy?’

As expected, she did not answer. Lovely.

You weren't exactly in appropriate garb to see people. You had thrown on something cool enough to not make you melt like one of the popsicles you weren't able to make earlier, and enough to cover any necessary areas. You were sure your hair looked about as luxurious as a barn, and there wasn't a lick of cosmetics on your face.

It was fine, you told yourself. You probably weren't even going to see this guy ever again.

You opened the door. “Hello? Can I help you?” You asked through the chain linking the door shut.

The man flashed you a flustered, dimpled smile at you. His dark hair was damp, like he just came out of a shower, and he had on a muscle tee that was definitely doing its job, and a pair of basketball shorts. “Hi! So sorry to bother you, but I was wondering if you've seen a Thai cat wandering around here about yea high—?”

“Meow.” The cat at your feet shoved her way between the gap you made with the door and out into the hallway.

Your eyes widened another smidge, until the man outside released a gasp of relief and bent down to scoop the feline up into his arms. You unlatched your door and opened it fully now, the man holding the cat to his face as if he was communicating with her telepathically.

“That's the cat, I'm guessing?” You mused.

He tucked her back into his arm and his smile became sheepish. “Yes, I am so sorry about her. I came back home from work and she wasn't in the apartment, but thank you for dealing with her for however long she was here.”

You waved off his concern with your hand, sending him a kind smile. “Don’t worry about it, really. She's adorable. What's her name, by the way?”

“Oh, this is Byeol,” he cooed, lifting Byeol's paw up to wave at you.

Swoon. Your smile widened as you waved back at them both. “Well, it was nice to meet you, both Byeol and…?”

“San,” he answered. God, he was gorgeous. That smile… “And you are?”

“Yn.” You shook each other's hands in the dim hallway light.

“Nice to meet you, too, Yn.” He lit up, pointing up to the ceiling. “Hey, I'm pretty sure I'm your upstairs neighbor!”

You opened the door to your apartment wider so you could show him your open window. “Well, that would definitely explain how she got down onto my fire escape,” you chuckled.

He whistled lowly. “Man, cats are scary sometimes. I'll definitely try to keep an eye on whenever she's near my window now.” He ran the back of his knuckles down Byeol's spine. “I don't wanna take up any more of your time, but thanks again.”

“No worries! Have a nice night.”

“You too!”

San began walking back toward the stairs at the end of the hallway, and you were about to close the door when you thought you heard him chastising his cat in hushed tones. You laughed to yourself as you locked up your front door. You wouldn't mind if Byeol came traipsing down your fire escape again.

And she would. About three times a week when San had a later shift at the boxing gym he worked at (yes, a boxing gym… good lord). Byeol oftentimes expected you to have your window open, and if you didn't already have it open, she would sit out on the fire escape until you did.

Two months into the fire escape escapades, you gave up and left the window open just enough for her to squeeze through while you returned to work.

San would always come down to your apartment to retrieve her, and at some point, decided to swing by your apartment on his way up instead just to make sure she wasn't already here.

By month four when the days were shorter and the nights dragged longer and colder, you couldn't exactly keep the window open, lest you wanted to freeze your ass off in the safety of your apartment. Byeol would hop down the fire escape in the evenings when you were back so you could let her in, only for her owner to come barreling down the stairs, dimpled cheeks flushed and exasperated.

“I swear she likes you more than me,” he guffawed from where he stood out in the hallway as he always did. He shook his head as he watched the Thai feline waltz around his legs once, then circle back into your apartment. He arched a brow at her. “Look at her strutting. She knows exactly what she's doing.”

You swore there was a dash of red gracing his cheekbones now.

You bit your lip through a smile. “Well, you're welcome to come in. I was just about to eat dinner and I don't really think I can finish this roast chicken alone.”

“Ah, I don't really wanna impose,” he drawled, scratching the back of his neck and peering at you from beneath those lengthy lashes of his. He knew what he was doing—he had to know what he was doing. If Byeol could strut, then so could Choi San.

He promised to take you up on your offer as long as you let him run upstairs to grab a bottle of wine to contribute.

The last thing you expected to happen was to hear a knock on your window less than ten minutes later. You nearly jumped out of your skin at the sound, folding over in laughter when you saw him waving to you on the other side with cold-bitten cheeks and a red-tipped nose. He clutched a bottle of red in one hand and gestured furiously to the window latch. “It's fucking freezing!”

“Okay, okay,” you grinned, walking over to let him inside. “Just so you know,” you said as Byeol welcomed her owner into your apartment, “usually it's just cats who come in this way.”

“Well, you might have to get used to a cat and a human coming in now,” he teased. San presented you the wine bottle with a flourish. “Milady, your beverage.”

“Why, thank you, good sir,” you jested and accepted the offering. “Make yourself at home!”

What you didn't expect was for such a statement to be taken so literally, and yet, you had no complaints.

Three months further along—making it seven in total since that first hot July day Byeol came in through the open window—you and San (and Byeol) were cooped up in your apartment as usual. It was a Friday night with dinner on the table, a TV show playing in the background, and a pair of wine glasses for the pair of you. Over the past few months, sharing a dinner together had become a weekly event wherein San would come in via window, and the two of you would have the evening together.

Sometimes it was just dinner, sometimes it was dinner and a movie, and sometimes it was even dinner, a movie, and drunk Pictionary. But every Friday night was yours and San's night.

Plus, he turned out to be a much better cook, so you definitely couldn't argue when he somehow wrestled his entire Le Creuset pot down the fire escape to feed you the most divine lobster mac 'n’ cheese you had ever tasted. (As if you'd ever had lobster mac 'n’ cheese before…)

“I feel like it would just be more convenient if I came up to your apartment instead,” you said with enthusiasm, your free arm flailing around as you melted dark chocolate on a double boiler upon the stove top. While San had the right side of the stove for his chicken and gnocchi soup, you had the left to prepare tonight's mousse for dessert. If San made dinner, you figured you could at least learn a thing or two about a dessert course.

He chuckled, “I mean, I'm not opposed if you ever get tired of hosting. I'm kind of a creature of habit though, which is why I don't mind coming down every week, but it's up to you, sweets.”

Oh, right. And the nickname. You couldn't even pinpoint when that started, but again, you weren't complaining.

“I don't mind hosting either,” you told him, “it's just that it's either you leave your super expensive cookware here or I go upstairs. I don't think Le Creuset has fire escape insurance.”

“You're not wrong about that.” You felt his hand gently brush against your waist as he slipped past you to get to the spice cabinet on your left. “Behind you,” he murmured by your ear before grabbing the jar of Himalayan salt (also his) and returning to his station behind his pot.

You couldn't deny the pitter-patter of your heart around him either. Things were coming to a point that you didn't know how to label. But perhaps that was the beauty of everything slipping into place. You carried on, “I think I've seen your apartment once, and that was when Byeol wouldn't stop meowing until I followed you guys.” You laughed to yourself at the memory. That had been an interesting night.

“If it's any consolation, your apartment has much more life in it than mine.”

“That's a lie,” you said pointedly. “Yours is just more meticulous.”

He snorted. “Meticulous. Might as well be as barren as a clinic.”

You passed him a glance. “I offered to paint your walls…”

San beamed back at you, dimples creating divots in the apples of his cheeks. “And I never said no! But—I do think that it should be something the both of us do together.”

Your brows creased as you took the chocolate off the stove to fold into the other mixture you'd set aside. “You wanna paint with me?”

“Yeah,” he said, almost bashfully. “I think it'd be a fun bonding and learning experience. And it would be cool to see you in your element, besides when you're drunk.”

The latter comment had you turning away to laugh. “Fair enough.”

When dinner was ready to be dined, and the mousse was freezing in the fridge, you and San sat at the kitchen island with your matching bowls of hot soup and glasses of lemon water for the night. Neither of you had remembered to buy wine for the week (surprisingly), but one week without alcohol wouldn't hurt.

The two of you clinked your glasses together, toasting to another week survived.

You took a sip, then spooned the soup into your mouth, wiggling around on your stool in a little happy dance as the flavors did their own dance on your tongue.

San smiled around his own bite. He swallowed, then said, “You know, I always know I did well when you do that.”

“Do what?”

“That cute little dance,” he chuckled. “I’m glad it tastes good, is what I'm saying, sweets.”

Your skin warmed, and you managed to convince yourself it was the soup or the heater or something and not the beautiful man beside you. “Then get used to the happy jig, because everything you cook tastes divine. You should be a chef, San.”

“I could've,” he shrugged, “but I kind of like this little life.” He gestured to you with his spoon, a twinkle in his eyes. “Don't you?”

For a moment, you let the smile slowly unfurl onto your lips. You lifted your own spoon in agreement. “You're right. It's a lovely, little life.”

Now that you were in agreement, you fell into a comfortable silence as you both enjoyed your dinner in one another's presence. Byeol was hunched over her own bowl of food just by the foot of your stool, against the adjacent side of the island. You'd gone out and bought her a pair of food and water bowls, as well as her preferred food. San had been touched by the gesture, and Byeol most definitely appreciated it.

San wiped his mouth with his napkin. “Oh, by the way, next week.”

You hummed. “What about it?”

“Are you doing anything?”

You perked up, eyebrows lifting to your hairline. “Why do you ask?” It was usually unsaid by now that Friday nights were set aside for the two of you to share an evening, which was why you were confused by his question.

And then he explained, “It's Valentine's Day, so I just wanted to make sure I didn't interrupt or assume anything.” He'd said it so casually and easily that you nearly missed the slight nervousness in his voice, or the minor intonation of hope. “I mean,” he fumbled, “if you do have something planned, then it's no worries, really. There are plenty of other weeks—”

You shook your head, finishing off your water after having scraped your bowl clean. “I'm not doing anything,” you said. “Well, besides what we usually do.” You chuckled to yourself, “To be honest, Valentine's Day completely slipped my mind this year.”

And if you were truly being honest with yourself, every Friday felt like Valent—no. You shouldn't think like that. It would only make things worse about how you felt for him now. Plus, these past few months with San felt far too casual, too domestic, to be like Valentine's Day. Was Valentine's Day not for grand gestures and romance? This wasn't grand… though, you could probably argue about the romantic part…

“No, I feel the same way,” he nodded. “My friend Wooyoung just asked today if I was up to go to a single's party, which was why I suddenly remembered.”

Ah. “Oh, are you planning on going?” Wine sounded pretty good right about now.

He grimaced. “Probably not. I—I was kind of hoping you wanted to still do dinner next week—but, like, it doesn't have to mean anything besides how it usually is. If that's what you're comfortable with.”

It doesn't have to mean anything besides how it usually is. What if you wanted it to mean more than how it usually was? There was nothing inherently wrong with how it usually was, but you couldn't deny that a part of you yearned for more. That part of you imagined what it was like if San didn't have to come see you via fire escape, and he was always in the same space as you.

There was a pause as you wrestled with your own conscience about how or if you were going to admit it to him.

He pressed his lips together. “I've made you uncomfortable.”

“No, you haven't made me uncomfortable,” you assured him swiftly. “I just…” You sighed, pressing a hand to your forehead then returning it to your lap. “Of course, I would love to have dinner with you next week, but I’d like it to mean something else—if you are comfortable with that.”

You watched as that beautiful smile you'd come to grow more fond of blossom onto his face. “I'd be more than comfortable with that—I’d be really happy with that, actually.”

“Good,” you said softly, unable to bite your own smile away. “Then dinner next week, it is.”

There was something fundamentally different about this next Friday night compared to the others. Specifically, the context by which you and San went into the Friday evening of Valentine's Day was completely different. The apartment was aglow with the same warmth as it usually boasted, but there was a bouquet of blood red roses in a glass vase on the kitchen counter beside a bottle of red wine.

San was at the stove, finishing off the last bit for dinner before it needed to simmer for a good thirty minutes. You were in the living room portion of your apartment, flipping through the vinyl records to play before you pulled one out and set it up. As you moved the needle onto the record, you placed the empty cover back into its slot and turned toward the kitchen.

You froze in your spot, skin warming at the sight of San leaning over the island counter with an adoring look in his eyes as he watched you. “What?” You laughed, subconsciously adjusting the sleeve of your blouse.

“Nothing,” he smiled. “You're just—you’re gorgeous.”

You were sure if your face didn't give it away, there must have at least been hearts floating around your head. “You cannot just say that,” you chided weakly as you walked over to where he was, your expression growing shy.

His smile widened and he rounded the counter to stand in front of you, your back pressed against the edge of the counter. “I can, too,” he teased. He stepped back once and held his arms out, fingers flicking toward him to beckon you forward. “C'mere. Can you dance?”

“Some.” Your eyebrows arched upward as you stepped forward and took his hands in yours. “Dancing and romancing, Choi San? What magic do you hope to enchant me with tonight?” You joked, moving your left hand to his shoulder.

“Perhaps magic that will leave your window open for me on nights other than Fridays,” he said sheepishly as the two of you began to sway to the music waltzing out from the record player. “Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your fire escape—”

You let out a laugh, ducking your head toward your chests. He did the same, an embarrassed grin coming onto his face as his nose nudged against yours.

“That was god awful,” he winced in apology.

“It was,” you agreed teasingly, “but I'll let it slide because you're cute.”

He shot you a bright smile. “Oh? So I'm cute? I guess that makes two of us.”

You weren't really sure at what point you realized you had fallen for this man. It was sometime between the Himalayan salt lectures and the dancing like an old married couple in your kitchen, maybe. You thought about the day he showed up at your door panicking about a missing cat, and to a future where you might have found yourself in his living room painting murals on his walls. Or perhaps… not his living room, but both of yours.

As you danced with your chests pressed together, hearts beating rapidly in sync, you gazed into those beautiful, dark brown irises of his and sank further and further into those feelings. They were gradually making themselves a home in your chest.

“What're you thinking about, sweets?” He murmured as you tucked your head against his shoulder and the arm he had around your waist rubbed the small of your back.

The smell of his cologne made you inhale deeply. You could get used to this—his smell, the feel of his body under your fingertips, his presence intertwined with yours taking up space in the best possible way. “I'm thinking that Byeol is a good matchmaker.”

His chuckle rumbled through him and softly into your ear. “You're definitely right about that.”

a/n: pls remember to reblog and comment if u enjoyed!

atz m.list

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[senditcolton]

As It Was

a/n: still a little angsty. but this one has a much more hopeful ending than the last, i feel.  word count: 1.1k warnings: none! gender neutral reader!

Whatever here that’s left of me is yours just as it was.

The first succession of knocks woke you up.

The second got you out of bed.

The third had you silent cursing whoever was on the other side of the door for being so goddamn persistent. Who had this much energy at two in the morning? What was so important that if couldn’t wait until the sun was in the sky?

You don’t get any answers when you look through the peephole and see the frame of the person standing on the doorstep, baseball cap pulled low over his pale blonde hair, the brim hiding his blue eyes. You quickly unlock the door, swinging it open, half expecting to be greeted with an empty hallway, like you imagined him.

But he’s still standing there.

“Elias.”

Your voice comes out as a whisper, filled with… disbelief? Hope? Melancholy? You weren’t quite sure. And from the look on his face as his eyes darted to meet yours, it was clear he wasn’t sure of the feelings twinging on the edge of your voice either.

You didn’t blame him for his uncertainty. After all, you had done many things that even you couldn’t understand. Such as making the decision to remove yourself from his life. For reasons that seemed so inconsequential now. Reasons that were so important to you back then.

“Can I come in?” he asks and it’s that gently accented voice that calls you back to reality, where you are still in your pajamas, blocking the doorway as Elias stands there, hands buried in his hoodie, the cool Vancouver night air blowing through the threshold.

You step aside, silently beckoning him into the apartment he had entered many times before. The door is closed shortly after, the sound of the deadbolt sliding into place echoing around the room before you turn back to him.

The silence that fills the space between you is heavy. You aren’t sure why he’s here. You aren’t sure if you are in the position to ask. So, instead, you ask a different question.

“How’d you know I was here?”

“Brock told me that you were crashing with him and Annie after… well, you know. And I know that they’re on their honeymoon right now so…” His voice trails off, head ducking back down to stare at his shoes. You can’t stop the small smile that tugs at the corner of your lips at his shyness, something that pulled you to him in the first place.

“Do you want some tea? Or coffee?” you ask, calling him back to you. A task that you were familiar with doing; bringing him out of his head.

One that you hadn’t been successful in for what felt like a long time. The failures of which were part of the reason the two of you found yourselves in the current situation.

“Tea would be nice. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” you murmur, moving to the kitchen to put the kettle on, grabbing mugs from the cabinet. You let yourself get lost in the motions, although you are still cognizant of Elias entering the kitchen behind you, settling down into one of the high-top chairs that line the island.

The steam coming off the top of the mugs is still strong as you set one down in front of Elias before grabbing the milk, honey, and sugar from their homes and returning to him. You watch as his elegant hands grab the ingredients he wants, taking a hold of the spoon and creating the drink to whose recipe you still had imprinted in the back of your mind.

You didn’t make it for him tonight though. Perhaps because you didn’t want him to know how much of you were made up of parts of him.

“Where are Coolie and Milo?” Elias asks after taking a sip of his tea.

“In their crates. We were all sleeping, y’know,” you gently tease him.

“Right,” he laughs lightly. “Sorry about that.”

There is another silence, one that is once again only filled with the sound ceramic against marble as you both sip your drinks.

“Are Brock and Annie treating you well?”

“What are you doing here, Elias?” you ask, refusing to further participate in this stumbling dance of small talk. Elias ducks his head again, taking another drink.

It was as if he didn’t think this through. There he was, waiting for the apartment to be empty of everyone except you before showing up to where you were currently living late at night. And now here he is, unsure and uncertain. Like he didn’t think you would let him in. Like he didn’t believe he would get this far.

“I just wanted to apologize,” he finally says, eyes darting to look at you and you can see the sincerity shining in his pupils. “I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said, when you left.”

“I said a lot things,” you murmur, your head now ducking down. “Not all of them fair.”

“Maybe,” his whisper gentle and assuring. “But you were right. These past few months, I neglected you. Put too much focus on my career, on winning, on leading even if no one was looking at me to lead. I was so worried about not being good enough for all of them, that I forgot to be good enough for you. I became a different person. And I can understand why you left. I wasn’t the man you fell in love with anymore.”

Every word he speaks lands heavily on you. Every word he speaks ignites that fire in you that always burned so brightly when it came to him.

“I guess,” Elias continues, “I just came back here to ask if it was possible for us to go back to how we used to be. Before all this. Before I drifted away. Before you left. I just wanted to see if you still wanted me. Despite everything I’ve done.”

“I will always want you, Elias. It was wrong of me to leave like that. You will always be the man I fell in love with. And I vowed to love you for better or for worse. I didn’t.”

“I vowed to love and cherish you always. And I didn’t.”

“I guess we both have some work to do,” you breathlessly laugh, causing that small smile to appear on Elias’ face. “But one thing’s for certain; I love you. Nothing is going to change that.”

“Nothing?”

“Nothing. I’m yours, just like I always have been.”

There aren’t any more words to say. And so, neither of you speak. Elias simply reaches his hand across the cool marble, sliding underneath your left hand and taking it in his own. You can’t surpress the shiver that runs through you as his calloused fingertips brush against your knuckles. And you don’t even attempt to stop the smile that appears on your lips when his thumb caresses the smooth metal band on your ring finger.

The one that he placed there a year ago.

A promise. Unmoved and everlasting.

[wreckmetoji]

idfc

An ongoing fic in which you don't realize you have both Fushiguros at your feet.

↳ Toji Fushiguro/Reader ↳ Minor elements of Megumi Fushiguro/Reader Part 1/?

Part 2 , Part 3 , Part 4

content warning. mentions of alcohol, profanity, minor angst, unrequited love, age gap, eventual smut This is part one of a several part story revolving around smut. **Minors DNI**

Length 1.5k words

A fun night resulting in a drunken mistake. That's all this was, right? The shock and humiliation upon waking up completely naked in a bed that wasn't your own is what immediately clouded your mind. Sitting up, you held your head in a desperate attempt to subdue the vicious pounding, face scrunched in pain. You had gone out for drinks with Itadori, Nobara, and Megumi, but you must have been blackout for half the evening. That's the only reasonable assumption, considering you didn't know where you were or how you got here. Really, what and how much did I drink last night? With one last squeeze of your head to get your bearings, you slowly opened her eyes, looking around the room in hopes of gathering your clothes as quickly as possible and getting the fuck out. Whoever owned this room probably didn't want their one night stand to overstay their welcome either. Wait.... You knew this room. You knew it like the back of her hand. No, no way. "Oh, you're awake." There's no fucking way. The resounding 'click' of the door closing behind the familiar figure made your stomach drop. You went pale, much to his dismay. He didn't show it. "Look, we don't... we don't have to-" "Megumi, what the fuck happened?" Deep blue eyes bore into your own, what was that look he was giving you? What was he to expect? The two of you had been attached at the hip since the end of high school, you were close, but not like this. Your panicked eyes followed his movements, watching him step towards you and sit on the edge of the bed. You instinctually pulled the dark duvet higher, making sure you were covering anything that may have been exposed. "It seems things got a little out of hand last night, I don't know how else to say this." "Did we actually, like... sleep with each other?" When he didn't say anything, didn't even react, seconds seemed to turn into minutes. 'No, I cleaned you up because you threw up everywhere. That's really why you're naked'. That must have been- "Yes." "Like, we had sex?" ".... Yes." Your head pounded in protest of the answer you didn't want to hear. He was like a brother to you, how did this happen? Megumi extended his hand, placing the pills he had brought on the bed beside you, catching the subtle shift of you pulling the blanket up higher out of the corner of his eye. "I'll give you some space. I folded your clothes, they're on top of my dresser. After you're done maybe we can... talk about this. Take your time," He exhaled the last of his sentence, standing up and leaving the room again. You hadn't ever gotten dressed that fast in your life. You didn't even bother with your bra and underwear, simply carrying them in the crook of your arm. Rushed footsteps came to a screeching halt when met with a tall broad form blocking the hallway. Toji seemed to be just as confused as you, viridescent eyes darting between your very disheveled appearance, your smeared makeup, and the undergarments you held in your hands. You couldn't tell by his expression, or lack thereof, but you made the safe assumption he came to the conclusion of what had transpired the second he saw you. "I'm sorry Mister Fushiguro, pardon me," You politely excused yourself, squeezing by him and running down the stairs. In one swift motion you had picked up your shoes, swung the front door open, and firmly closed it behind you, leaving nothing but an uncomfortable silence in the Fushiguro household. It took you a while to get home, not stopping for a second to even put your shoes on just in case someone were to run after you. You had no doubts Megumi would. The jingling of your keys, the click of the lock, and the loud slam of the door behind you is what finally set you off. The rest of your day was spent in self loathing, crying, tylenol, and regular trips in and out of the bathroom to empty the nothingness in your stomach. Only as the sun was setting, orange and dark blue painting the sky, did you decide you needed to text Megumi about what happened. That was, if you had your phone. "Are you KIDDING me?!" You grumbled to yourself, flipping over cushions, digging through the clothes you had worn last night, scouring every surface. You must have left it at his house. His room. Newfound humiliation washed over you, knowing that you would have to see him face to face. Knock knock. Jumping at the sudden sound, you looked over to the door with wide inquisitive eyes. Did Misses Kageyama lose her cat again? You tiptoed over to the door, having to stand on your toes to look through the peephole. Today is so shit, you thought to yourself, unlocking and opening your door, but not removing the deadbolt. You peered at the tall man on the other side, warily looking up at him through your lashes. "Yeah, that's the reaction I was expecting," Toji sneered, holding out a familiar cellular device. "Kid said you might want this back." You slipped your much smaller hand through the door, grabbing onto it and tugging. Once you realized he wasn't going to let go, you let out an exasperated sigh, closing your eyes and leaning your forehead on the back of the door. "How did you get past the door-man? You didn't buzz up." "I didn't give him a choice." Toji mused, the side of his lips twitching up. "So are you gonna stand here with my phone hostage all night? Or can I close my door." You were visibly agitated. He was obviously sent here for a reason, but with how amused he seemed at your grumpy exterior you couldn't imagine he was here on behalf of defending Megumi. His lack of response was all you needed, knowing how stubborn he was. One dejected sigh and adjustment of the deadbolt later, Toji was pushing himself through and headed for the kitchen. Make yourself at home, you rolled your eyes at his intrusive behavior. "He wanted to come by and give it to you, but I told him it'd probably be better if I did it," Toji explained upon reaching the kitchen island, leaning against it and patting a bar stool. Begrudgingly, you shuffle over and sit down. Toji always had a rocky relationship with his son, and you knew this. Megumi once told you to think of Toji is more of an older friend than a parental figure, since he's really not good at that. With that mindset, being around him became significantly less tense, giving you room to express yourself freely. "You looked like shit leaving the house this morning." "You can leave now." Toji put the phone down, sliding it towards you on the granite countertop. "Look, I'm not here to judge what you kids are or aren't doing, all I'm saying," He paused, eyes never leaving yours, "Is that you didn't seem very happy with your decision." "Actually, it seems like you regret it a lot." He was right. You knew he was right, if you could go back in time right now and even prevent yourself from going out with everyone, you would do it in a heartbeat. You felt disgusted in yourself, this was akin to having sex with a sibling for you. Even though you didn't say anything, the expression you held and the way you chewed the inside of your cheek spoke volumes. Toji didn't seem to miss that. "In my experience," He broke the silence, "The best way to get over regrettable sex is to have unregrettable sex." Your eyes locked with his, throat suddenly becoming dry. "Where was that keen parenting when you were raising Megumi?" You meant to sound bitter, but it came out as a whisper. He chuckled at your meek attempt to halt the conversation. He decided to ignore it. "I'm giving you a line, it's up to you if you wanna grab it or not." He leaned back over the counter as he spoke, hand coming down to your knee and inching, painstakingly slowly, up your leg. "If I know anything-" "Do you?" He gripped your thigh, it must have been hard enough to bruise, but the look in his eye was more dangerous than his hands. Instinctively, you pressed your thighs together, heart racing and God you hoped he couldn't hear it. "I'm an expert at fucking," Toji's tone dropped, viridescent eyes drinking in your flustered appearance, but stopping at where his hand was on your upper thigh. His grip loosened, gently caressing the skin there. "After I'm done with you, Megumi'll be the last thing on your mind. You want to feel good?" Everything that had happened today, all of your regrets, all your frustration, your humiliation, came crashing down on you, it fogged your mind. Toji was undeniably attractive, you've known that since the moment you met him. If you do this, there's no turning back. "What do you think?" He pressed, his hand moving up to the seam of your shorts. Fuck it. "What... did you have in mind?" The predatory grin that split his face made you surge with fear and delight, watching his scar pull taught in the most deliciously tantalizing way. "Why don't I show you?"

[mochegato]

Even the Losers

Chapter 7

Chapter 1     Chapter 6

Marinette rubbed her head as though the action might actually have an effect on her throbbing headache.  It hadn’t any time she’d tried it in the last hour, but it gave her brain the illusion that she was doing something to help other than just waiting for the painkillers to kick in.  The action also gave her something to focus on other than the pounding hangover from not getting nearly drunk enough last night.  Because somehow despite the massive amounts she, Jason, and Roy had drunk last night, all of her problems still existed.  Utter bullshit, that.  And now she still had to deal with all her problems and felt like crap on top of it.  Double bullshit.

She adjusted her sunglasses again, fighting the urge to squint because squinting hurt.  Although honestly, she wasn’t sure which hurt more, the florescent lights, the sunlight beaming through the hotel windows, or squinting.  She was sure there was some way to settle the glasses on her face to block out all light, she just hadn’t been able to figure it out.  She now realized why people significantly smarter than her wore those godawful, ugly glasses that wrap around their head and cut out all sun.

She took a deep breath and braced herself for the full blast of a suspiciously sunny Gotham morning. Gotham has like three sunny days a year and one of them is today?  What the Hell did she do to Tikki to deserve the last few days?  She wandered out of the hotel still contemplating revenge. How does one get revenge against a god anyway?  How many ways can she destroy cookies?

She didn’t get more than a few steps before she sensed someone in front of her.  She weaved slightly to the left but quickly realized there was someone there too.  She weaved to the right and finally looked up when she realized there was someone there. There were people all around her, taking pictures of her, shoving phones in her face as they yelled questions at her.

She stumbled back a few steps and blinked at the group of reporters that had apparently been camping out in front of the hotel for her.  She quickly plastered on one of Adrien’s patented PR smiles and nodded to them. She tried to push through them, expecting them to move out of her way, as they did in Paris for Adrien.  But reporters in Gotham clearly did not show the same respect that Parisian reporters did because none of them moved out of her way.  

Her smile strained slightly as she looked to the one in front of her.  “Excuse me, please,” she requested in the most sickeningly sweet voice she could manage.

The reporter sent back an excited smile.  “Ms. Dupain Cheng, would you care to comment on your relationship with your family? Perhaps explain why Gotham hadn’t had the pleasure of your presence before?”

Marinette looked the reporter up and down.  She looked at the group surrounding her, noting how they had closed the circle to the point of touching her.  She’d been to raves with more personal space.  She moved to push through a small gap between reporters, but stopped when they quickly closed the gap.  Marinette gritted her teeth and widened her smile.  “There’s a reason we’ve chosen not to speak about this and that reason was NOT to discuss it in an exclusive with you at this exact moment.  Now if you will excuse me, I would very, very much like to get some coffee.  I’m sure you can understand the difficulty of starting a day without it.”

She gave them a conspiratorial smile, hoping if they felt like they were in on the joke they would let her through. Instead, her response emboldened the reporters, who started shouting out her name and more questions.

“Will you attend more Wayne functions now?”

Marinette didn’t even know which reporter shouted the question to address them if she wanted.  She huffed and decided to give up on pleasantries.  She was hung over.  She was hungry.  She wanted coffee.  “Why would people change a relationship that doesn’t involve you because you know about it?” she grunted as she tried to push through the cracks between people.  

The reporters closed ranks tighter around her, making it impossible for her to break through without injuring someone, which she was sure was the plan of at least a few of them.  Whether it was to get a more salacious story or to sue Bruce Wayne, she wasn’t sure.  Probably both.  She looked back to the hotel lobby hoping the concierge would see her predicament and help her, but he was determinedly ignoring the scene in front of the hotel.

She set her jaw and prepared herself to create a scene channeling her best imitation of an irate Chloe Bourgeoisie.  She’d deal with the fallout later.  Right now, she needed to get out of this situation before someone actually did push a little too hard and tiny gods decided to curse the city.  She opened her mouth to yell but instead heard someone else’s voice boom through the crowd.

“I think my sister told you to leave her the fuck alone.”

Marinette looked around to try to find the source of the voice but couldn’t see past the wall of reporters.  She didn’t have to wait long for him to push his way through the crowd like a wrecking ball, not worrying about injuring anyone as he shoved his way through.  Jason stopped in front of her with a smirk.  “She just says it in a much more polite way than I do.”  He held up a bag and a tray of coffee.  “I come bearing gifts so you don’t have to deal with this shit out there somewhere.”  

Marinette shot him a grateful smile and turned back toward the hotel.  “That sounds brilliant.  Thank you.”

Jason winked at her.  “I got you.”

They didn’t stop or even look at each other until the elevator doors closed behind them.  Marinette leaned against the wall and finally took a full breath.  She looked over to Jason with another grateful smile.  “Thank you. I wasn’t expecting that and I…” She looked down for a moment to collect her thoughts.  “I wasn’t prepared.  I’ll do better next time.”

Jason’s eyes softened.  The press was a lot for all of them to get used to.  None of them had taken naturally to it, especially Gotham’s press.  They at least had the advantage of starting young and knowing what to expect, not to mention since they were kids, the press didn’t have a lot of chances to get to them.  Marinette had just been thrown out there without a life preserver.  Bruce didn’t even send any guards.  “Don’t worry about it.  I thought you could use the save.”

Marinette laughed and narrowed her eyes at him.  “That was a socially acceptable version of a kidnapping.  I had no way of getting out of that without exposing that there is no relationship.”

“Should have just exposed it then,” he shrugged, not remotely nonplussed by her comment.  “I just thought you could use some sustenance after last night.”  He held up the bag for her as they exited the elevator and made their way to her room.  “I know you must be used to fancy French food so I got a variety of food from the best bakery in town.  And I didn’t know how you take your coffee or if you prefer tea so I got both and lots of sugar and creamer.”

Marinette giggled as she opened her door.  “You’re not wrong.  My parents owned a patisserie.  I grew up on the best baked goods in France.”

Jason blinked a few times at her before setting the drinks and food on the coffee table.  “That’s it, next family reunion is at your place.”

“Not so sure that’s going to be a thing,” she said quietly.  She reached for one of the croissants and ripped off a small piece, popping it in her mouth.  “Not really sure I count as family.  That’s kind of been made clear.”

“Yeah well, we didn’t know and we’d like to get to know you, if you’re okay with it,” he said biting off a chunk of cheese Danish. “Look, I’m not looking for family dinners and brunches and shit, I just… want to make sure you’re okay.”  He looked up at her earnestly for a moment before his eyes turned mischievous.  “Although if you grew up in a bakery, I might want all that at your parents’ place.”

“At least you’re asking.  That’s something anyway,” she grumbled as she took another small bite.  

“Speaking of family, where is model boy?”

Marinette puckered her lips in disapproval as she watched the crumbs fall from Jason’s mouth as he spoke.  She looked away before she snapped at him.  “He and Max went apartment hunting.”

“Without you?” Jason asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Neither of them were suffering from a raging hangover that took double the normal dosage of painkillers just to take the edge off of,” she said pointedly.

“Coffee,” Jason grunted, motioning toward the coffee. “Lots of coffee and food and water.” He pushed the bag toward her. “Not the bird bites you’ve been taking.”

She studied the croissant in front of her with a furrowed brow as though it had some kind of answers for her.  She nearly dropped it when she heard a knock on the door. She looked through the peephole and gasped, flinching back from the door.  Jason immediately jumped up and ran over to her.  “What is it?  Another reporter?”

“No,” Marinette rasped out, her eyes never leaving the door.  “Worse.” Her heart started racing and her breathing became labored.  She wasn’t ready for this.  She wasn’t ready to speak with him.  What was she supposed to say?  How was she supposed to speak with him?  She didn’t even know how she felt yet.  She hadn’t sorted through this all yet.  Tears threatened to fall from her eyes.  She wasn’t ready.  This was happening too fast.

She flinched visibly when he knocked again. He’d had time to prepare.  He’d had time to think this through.  He knew how he felt about this.  He’d had time to plan and prepare.  She had none of that and here he was on her doorstep.  He knew about her and she knew nothing about him. He was ready and she wasn’t given that chance.  

She was just expected to deal with it.  She was just expected to handle it.  She was just expected to accept it.  He’d created this entire situation and she was left to pick up the pieces and move on.  And now he was here.  He was on her figurative doorstep in person and now she had to deal with it, on his timetable, according to his preference, because yet again it all had to be done on his terms.  Her preferences didn’t matter.  Her feelings didn’t matter.  Her opinion didn’t matter.

“Want me to kick their ass out?” Jason offered already reaching for the handle.

Marinette shook her head and let out a calming breath. He thinks he can come in after twenty years gone and act like everything is fine and expect her to play nice, he has another thing coming.  He wanted a detached relationship?  She could do that.  She’d seen it enough growing up with Adrien and Chloe’s parents.  She knew how to play the game.

She shook her hands to get the tension out before finally reaching out to open the door.  “Mr. Wayne.  This is an unexpected pl… experience,” she stuttered.  She mentally grimaced.  She was showing weakness.  She needed to be strong.  She plastered on a clearly fake smile.  She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of being weak.  She wouldn’t cry for him.  She hadn’t cried because of him in the twenty years he’d been absent, she wouldn’t do it now.

Bruce took a breath.  “Marinette…”  He froze for a second.  He hadn’t thought hard enough about this.  He knew what he wanted to say, what he wanted to tell her, but he hadn’t thought about how to tell her, how to lead into it.  “I was hoping to speak with you,” he rushed out, wincing internally at the sound of it.

“Well, that’s a first,” she scoffed before she could stop herself.  She slapped her hand over her mouth and mentally berated herself.  What was she doing?  She was supposed to be calm not cruel.  She was losing this game!

Jason grinned and propped his arms behind his head as he kicked out his legs, the very picture of relaxed.  “I like her.  I’m keeping her.”

Marinette shot him an appreciative smile but Bruce did a double take, frowning at the sight.  His mind raced as to what it meant that Jason was there.  Was it good?  It was good, wasn’t it?  She was getting close to one of her brothers already.  But that brother was Jason, and despite the fact that he loved Jason, he was well aware their relationship was still contentious at best.  Not exactly the best brother for her to get close to. And he was already encouraging her hostility against him.  Not that he didn’t deserve it, he knew he did, it was just that any of the other brothers would help mitigate that hostility.  Jason would fan it.  “Jason, what are you doing here?”

“Brought baked goods and coffee,” he answered casually, a smirk making its way onto his face.  “You?”

Bruce let out a heavy sigh through his nose and smoothed out his face.  Getting annoyed now would do nothing for his goal.  If Marinette was connecting to Jason, getting frustrated with him would just push her further away.  “As I mentioned, I was hoping I could speak with Marinette about the… situation.  I wanted…”

“‘The situation’,” Jason mocked shaking his head at Bruce.  God was he always this bad with his kids?  He thought it was just him.  “Way to sound sincere, B.”

Bruce’s lips pursed until they were no longer visible. He didn’t need Jason sabotaging him right now.  He was doing a good enough job of it on his own.  “I’d like to speak with Marinette on our own, please.  Why don’t you go home?”

Marinette’s eyes went wide and her chest clenched. She didn't want Jason to leave.  She wasn't ready for Jason to leave.  Once Jason left it was just her and him.  Just thinking about it suddenly she couldn't breathe.  Suddenly the air felt too thin and too heavy at the same time.  No.  She needed somebody else here.  

Jason shot a look over to Marinette, letting his eyes pass over Marinette like he hadn’t been noting her body language.  He let his eyes wander for a second before returning to Bruce with a tilt to his head.  “No.  I’m witnessing this, unless Pixie tells me to go home.”

Marinette could have kissed him… on the cheek. Because he was her br… it was complicated.  But she was beyond grateful he had spoken up for her.  She let out the breath she’d been holding and raised an eyebrow at him. “Pixie?”

“Small, violent,” Jason grinned at her.

Marinette laughed and playfully narrowed her eyes at him. “Fine, whatever, Goliath.”

Jason leaned back again.  “Oh, no, that one’s already taken.  By a dragon bat, no less.”

Marinette’s face scrunched in confusion.  She tried to search through her Americanisms for what a dragon bat could be.  It had to be a species of bat right?  Maybe? But then again it was American English so for all she knew it could be a flower.  “A what?”

“Jason!” Bruce admonished.  He was really not looking forward to trying to explain what a dragon bat was or how Damian came to be in possession of one.

Jason rose up enough to grab one of the croissants and shove half of it into his mouth before he spoke.  “I’ll introduce you sometime, or Damian will have to actually… which he won’t.  I’ll show you a picture, you seem like the kind of person who likes terrifying animals as long as they’re fuzzy.”

“I… fair,” Marinette conceded easily.

“If I can bring us back to the topic at hand,” Bruce interjected loudly, cutting off any more discussion of dragon bats.

“Family bonding, right?”  Jason cut him off with a pointed look.  “Isn’t that what we were doing?”

Bruce glared at Jason for a few seconds, which did nothing to wipe the smug smirk off his face.  Giving up on Jason, Bruce focused on Marinette.  “At the gala you mentioned you didn’t plan on being in town much longer, leaving today actually.  I was hoping I could convince you to stay a bit longer.”

Marinette examined him with a dour curiosity.  She cocked her head to the side.  “And why might that be?  You don’t need me here to make an announcement that we prefer to keep our relationship private, hence they didn’t know about me.”

Bruce let out a deep sigh.  That was fair.  It was a fair response.  Sabine had warned him she would be suspicious of him.  “This isn’t for the public,” he assured her.

“Isn’t it?”  She blinked a few times at him, her face blank.  “Are you sure?  It feels like it is.”  She turned to Jason.  “Doesn’t it feel like it is to you?”

“It does indeed,” Jason nodded in agreement, keeping eye contact with Bruce as he did.

“Jason…” he started threateningly.

“Oh, I’m sorry, were you relying on me to make fixing your fuck up easier for you?  Wrong kid.  You’re looking for Dick or Tim… actually I wouldn’t rely on Tim for help explaining why being an absentee father isn’t actually that bad.”

“Jason, I think it’s time for you to go home,” Bruce growled.

Marinette straightened up and moved between him and Jason.  She wasn’t going to let him bully Jason for standing up for her.  “I don’t think so.  So far he’s the only member of my family I like.”

“Ooh, you should totally give Cass and Steph and Duke a chance too,” Jason offered with a faked enthusiasm as though the confrontation with Bruce didn’t just happen.  He kept his eyes on Marinette but relished the increasingly frustrated scowl on Bruce’s face as they ignored him.

Marinette nodded.  “I’ll consider it.”

“Oh and Alfred… and I guess Tim too.  He’s a prick but he’s alright I guess,” Jason continued.

Marinette blinked at him.  It was like a never ending list of people.  An ongoing list of people he had taken in after walking away from her.  A long list of people he’d cared about and for without having to be pressured into it by the press.  A mile long list of people he wasn’t pretending to care about.  “How many brothers and sisters do you have?”

“We have a lot,” Jason corrected her.  They were in this together and he’d remind her of that as many times as she needed.  “Alfred isn’t a sibling though.  He’s like a grandfather.”

Marinette paused at that.  She hadn’t considered that.  Another grandfather figure.  Another grandfather that didn’t want anything to do with her.  Sure now Grand-père Roland loved her but for the first fifteen years, he’d known about her and didn’t care.  Maybe it was her.  It had to be her right?  Two grandparents, that isn’t coincidence.  That’s a pattern and the only commonality was her.  She pursed her lips together to focus on something other than the tears welling up behind her eyes.  “Sounds like the kind of person who definitely would have known about me.”

Jason’s eyes widened.  “I… don’t know the answer to that,” he answered slowly.

Marinette nodded, slowly going numb.  “So, what I’m getting from this so far is I have a another grandfather-type figure that knew about me and didn’t feel any kind of interest in me and a ton of people that my father decided were worthy of his love and affection when I wasn’t.  So it isn’t that my father didn’t want to be a father, just that he didn’t want to be my father.”

“That isn’t…” Jason started.  This was going down the wrong path.  He was trying to show her he had her back, not remind her about the pain.  But instead, now Marinette was getting hurt, remembering the pain.  She’d lost her sass and impertinence and now was moving toward hurt.  And she was blaming Alfred.  Alfred was one of the only good things about being a Wayne!

“Jason!  I think it’s time for you to go home.  Now!” Bruce roared.

Marinette contemplated Bruce coldly, numbness consuming her fears and insecurities and morphing into cold, analytic contemplation.  He was blaming Jason.  Her frustration wasn’t because of Jason or anything he said. Her pain wasn’t because of Jason, it was because of him, because of his decisions.  And instead of taking responsibility for it, he was blaming Jason.

Jason blinked a few times, no longer certain of his role in this interaction.  He looked back and forth between Marinette and Bruce, noting Marinette’s hardening features.  She was getting ready for a fight.  He could see it developing, but he wasn’t at all sure Bruce did.  He held up his hands in surrender and sat back down calmly. “I promised I wouldn’t leave unless Pixie asked me to.  I intend to keep my promise to her,” he said calmly.

Bruce glared at him again and faced back to Marinette, a fake smile plastered on.   “As I was saying.  I’d like a chance to get to know you, if you would let me.”

“And how many members of the press did you want to be there when you do?” she inquired sharply.

Bruce sighed and rubbed his forehead.  “That’s not fair.”

Marinette’s mouth dropped and she shook her head at him incredulously.  “Wow. Way to pull the rich, white guy entitlement card. ‘I know everything about this situation has been unbelievably unfair to you, but now I’m being inconvenienced in the mildest way possible and I don’t like it,’” she mocked. She rocked back on her heels and narrowed her eyes at him.  “Rest assured M. Wayne, I do not intend to speak out against you.  Your reputation will not be harmed by me.  Tell the press whatever you want.  I won’t contradict you.  You can relax.”

“Marinette…” he started, unsure of where to go. Everything she had said was so far from the truth, he didn’t know where to start.  Her view of the situation was so skewed, he didn’t know how to put it back on kilter.  His shoulders sagged in defeat.  “This has nothing to do with the press.  I had put plans in motion to get in contact with you before any of this started.  Mr. Fox will confirm that for you if you don’t trust me.  You seem like quite an impressive young lady and I would like to get to know you better, if you’ll give me the chance.”

His tone was contrite and quiet, but Marinette wasn’t done being upset yet.  She wasn’t ready to move on and let go of the anger.  “And if I wasn’t, you would continue to ignore me?  If I was a problem child, if I had social issues, if I couldn’t find a job, you’d continue to treat me like I never existed?  I’ve finally done enough to gain your attention. Oh thank you so much for letting me know.”

“That isn’t what I said,” Bruce rushed to assure her. “I meant to compliment you not say you had to earn my attention.”

Marinette pursed her lips and looked over to Jason. He was looking back at her with sympathetic, concerned eyes.  She let out a long sigh and looked away from them both.  “Look, I meant what I told the press earlier.  I had no intention of you seeing me at the gala.  I had no intention of anyone finding out about me. I didn’t even know there was anything to find out when I made the plan to come here.  And I have no expectation of anything about our relationship changing.”

Bruce perked up slightly, but focused on keeping his body language the same, so she wouldn’t see the difference.  That was an opening; expectation instead of intention. It wasn’t that she intended not to change it, it’s that she didn’t expect it.  “I do,” he assured her, trying to keep the excitement out of his voice, keeping it calm and even.  “I would like to change our relationship.  I would like the chance to explain and try to start to make it up to you.  If you would like to try.  

“If you’re open to it, I can extend your reservation until you are ready to move on, or if you would prefer, you are more than welcome to stay at the manor.  I would love to have you stay with us but I understand that may be overwhelming.  Or, WE has have some flats available, with multiple bedrooms.  You and your friends could stay there for a while.  Your friend is going to need a place to stay while he looks for an apartment, right?

“I’ll leave the choice to you.  Whether we pursue a relationship, if you stay, where you stay; they’re all your choice.  Here,” he handed her a paper with several numbers hand written on it. “These are my numbers; office, home office, cell phone, manor.  You can use any of them to contact me.”

Marinette took the paper impassively.  She squeezed her other hand in an effort to keep the tremble from being too obvious.  “Thank you, M. Wayne.  I will consider your words.”

Bruce nodded, letting the very formal use of his name wash away.  This was still progress.  This was still movement in the right direction, even if it wasn’t as much as he would want.  He knew it could take a long time.  He knew he wouldn’t be able to fix this today.  “Thank you, Marinette.  That’s all I can ask for.  And I’m sorry for ambushing you here.  I tried to call and text you all yesterday to set up a time to talk in person so you could prepare but it seems like your phone was off.”  

He let out a small breath seeing her eyes widen at his admission.  That had to be a good sign.  Maybe he actually said the right thing for once.  He nodded to her and left her to think, hoping Jason would urge her to call. He seemed to want a relationship with her as well.  Hopefully, he would realize this was the best way to get that.

Jason sighed and looked up at her as soon as the door closed behind Bruce.  ���How are you feeling?”

“I’m not.  It’s… it’s a lot.  I think I want to be alone,” Marinette said absently staring at the numbers in her hand.

Jason nodded.  “It is.  I understand. If you want to talk, at all, about anything.  About where to drink in town, best burger, anything, give me a call.”  He gently took the paper Bruce had handed her out of hand, letting her decide if she gave it to him or not.  When she let go, he put his number on it as well.  “I only have one number, but now you have it.”

Marinette nodded at him.  “Thank you, Jason.”

Jason hesitated briefly.  “For what it’s worth, if you decide to stay you should take him up on the flat.  The hotel is stupid expensive and WE offers the flat to visiting collaborators all the time, so it’s not like it’s all that special… if you want to avoid being treated special.”

Marinette nodded at his words, barely taking them in as her mind tried to fight the numbing process.  Jason watched her tentatively.  “You look like a hugger,” he said uncertainly.  “Did you… do you want a, um, a hug?”  

Marinette looked over at him and blinked a few times, not sure how to take his words, partly because he seemed unsure of them himself, but partly because things were having a harder time permeating her brain right now.  Jason took her curious look as doubt.  “Oh come on. It’s fine.  I wouldn’t offer if I didn’t mean it.  Trust me.  I tell Dick to fuck off enough when he tries to hug me.  I have no problem saying no to hugs I don’t want.  I’m offering because I mean it.”

Marinette blinked a few more times but finally nodded vacantly.  Jason pulled her into a warm, comforting hug.  After a few moments he pulled away.  “It will all be okay.  No matter what you decide, it will all be okay.  And no matter what you decide, I’m here.  Nobody’s replacing you as my sister.  So get ready for some completely inappropriate Christmas presents this year.”

Marinette smiled absently at his joke, her eyes never meeting his.  “Thanks, Jason.”  She leaned against the door after she closed it behind him and slid down it, staring blankly at nothing.  The room felt colder than it was before, but she couldn’t manage to care enough to get up and get a blanket.  She thought there might have been ambient noise going on around her but none of it registered.  Nothing registered.  Not the numbing sensation that was rapidly overtaking her body from her fingers and toes up to her head until she stopped feeling anything.  Not even the point she was staring at.  She didn’t know how long she stared at the nothingness before black overtook her vision and she passed out.

Chapter 8

Tags:

@maribat-bdbwm @jayjayspixiepop @redscarlet95 @alice-hazelwood @deathssilentapproach-blog @unoriginalmess @alyssadeliv @emotionalsupportginger @frieddonutsweets @when-no-wings-do-broomsticks @toodaloo-kangaroo @colorfulmongerpsychicranch @iloontjeboontje @wolf-for-life @maribatserver @aespades @prettylittlebutterflie @imarivers8  @ certainmuffinbagelcalzone @ritacrow-blog @unoriginalmess @demonicbusiness @kking13 @lady-bee-fechin @blur-of-colours @kittenmywaythrulife @kashlyn 

[a-simple-imagine]

An Afterthought pt.2

Synopsis: Maeve shows up on your doorstep one night all sad and what not then leaves. Now it’s your turn to try and make amends. 

Pairing: Queen Maeve x fem!reader

Words: 4.1+

A/N - Did someone call for an angsty part 2 to a story i put out almost a year ago?? I got a fair few requests for this so here it is. I hope you enjoy it sorry if you don’t. request are open btw.

Warning - Swearing, violence and a very brief mention of zombies. 

Part 1 

Thoughts about Maeve are more frequent as of late. What was once just a passing thought as you spotted her face on magazine covers or painted on walls now became bothersome. What exactly had brought her to your doorstep that night? It had just been so unexpected. It left you so painfully curious for answers. There had to be more to the story. Not to mention, you also found yourself missing here once again: more so than before. A deep ache that came from an old forgotten wound that had begun to heal through time. A week had passed before you decided to do something stupid. It's amazing what you can find out online these days.

A bright sun sat high in the sky which left the air dry and you feeling warm. The hustle and bustle of city life was always your least favourite thing about living here and it was even worse today. Crowds of people stand behind a barrier that was maned by a few security guards. Did these people not having anything better to do than gawk at supes all day? You had basically scrubbed the internet to find out where she would be today which lead to a Twitter thread between someone called @MAEVESWIFE and @maelander who were talking about a vought commercial being shot outside the tower today. Queen Maeve and Homelander would both be there. But at least you personally knew here unlike these guys. It was kind of cool how many people idolised them. Working your way through the crowd, you earned some very dirty looks for trying to get to the front. Homelander and Maeve were in fact stood before a crew of people and a few cameras, smiling brightly and saying something you couldn't quite hear. Maeve seemingly spots you among the crowd so you wave a little. It was hard to figure out if she was happy or furious but she signals for a break and charged towards you. The crowd erupts with excitement as the Queen herself graces them with her presence and Homelander trails behind her. The woman offers nothing but polite smiles to the adoring fans as she takes your hand leading you along the length of the barrier and over to the threshold. It was safe to say that just about everyone who was still standing behind the security guards was very pissed off that you were getting special treatment.

"What are you doing here?" She growls through gritted teeth and a plastered on smile that disappears once you're out of view from prying eyes.

"I wanted to see you after-"

"Who's this?" You both turn to him and then back to each other.

"Oh my god, it's Homelander," You express, plastering on your brightest smile. Tall, Muscular with an award-winning smile. Bright blue eyes and silky blonde hair. The one and only Homelander walks up beside the two of you. It was almost humbling to be standing before the leader of the seven. He was so powerful- they both were and you were nothing short of ordinary.

"This is a closed set,"

Maeve didn't seem to know what to say exactly so you take it upon yourself to introduce yourself to him as her friend. Although you weren't even sure you could call yourself that at this point. It was a complicated relationship and considering you had broken up, it was the most appropriate label.

"Oh, She has never mentioned you,"

You're about to answer when Maeve takes your arm abruptly and pulls you away from the man. "Will you give us a second,"

A little confused, you give him a little wave goodbye paired with an awkward little smile. His eyes seem to trail after you but you think nothing of it.

"He's taller than expected," You muse aloud as attention falls back to your ex-girlfriend. Arms crossed over her chest and with a less than favourable expression on her face, it's pretty clear she isn't happy. Now she knows what it's like to have an ex show up unannounced.

"What do you want?" Maeve whisper yells at you. "I'm a little busy."

"I know just..." A quick glance to Homelander who had returned to his adoring fans. He had superhearing so you were pretty sure he could still hear you anyway. "after the other night I wanted to make sure you were okay."

"I'm fine."

"If everything was fine you wouldn't show up on my doorstep." A casual shrug of your shoulders. Maeve may be able to fake a smile for the cameras but it was always pretty obvious to you when she was lying to you.

"I said I'm fine. You need to leave."

"Maeve," A soft sigh leaves your lips and you take her hand in yours; brushing your thumb over the back of her hand. "You can talk to me."

"Leave," She growls, pulling her hand away. "Please."

"We need to talk about the other night- you at least owe me that."

With a deep breath, Maeve turns on her heel and begins to walk away. "I'm busy,"

For a moment you just watched her walk away then jogged after her. "Then we can talk later- you could come by tonight? I'll even make dinner."

"Fine. Now leave."

This time you let her walk away and continue making her little advertisement. You wouldn't admit to her that you stuck around a little longer. Even got a chance to talk to Homelander a little before heading home. Chill dude, if not a little intimidating. Maybe it had been a stupid idea to invite your ex-girlfriend over for dinner but you wanted to get to the bottom of all this. You were actually a little nervous for her to arrive. Cooking had never been your specialty but you wanted everything to be perfect. A quick stop on the way home to buy groceries, you worked on dinner since getting home. pacing around as you waited for her to arrive. And waited. And waited. and waited. Lucky for the uneasy feeling that had settled in your stomach, Maeve didn't show up. It probably should have been expected. She had never been the most reliable person unless she was saving the world apparently.

A loud bang has you stirring awake before the sun. It was probably just the neighbours; a loud groan as you bury your face into the covers to go back to sleep. But the banging doesn't stop and you soon realise it's your door. Rolling over, you check your phone to see it's four in the morning. What could anyone want at this time in the morning? Dragging yourself from under the protection of the duvet, you cautiously head to the door. Peaking through the peephole to see... Queen Maeve. "Just give me a chance."

A chance? You weren't sure she deserved any more of those but you still unlock the door and pull it open. Glancing over her as she offers up a smile. Does she ever wear anything other than her armour? "Chances comes after nine am." You protest putting what little strength you had into trying to close the door. It was effortless on her end to keep it open.

"You invited me over, remember?"

"I invited you over for dinner, Maeve. No sane person has dinner at four in the morning."

"I forgot I had a team-up with Black Noir- Just let me in."

With a defeated sigh, you step aside and retire to the couch. Slumped down against the cushions, your head falls back as your eyes flutter closed. The click of your door infers she follows you inside.

"Tired?"

"Mhmm." You hum, nodding nonchalantly.

"Do you want me to make you some coffee?" Maeve suggests and again, you nod. She was familiar with the apartment so she knew where everything was but it still felt a little odd to have her wandering around with such familiarity. Who just shows up this early for a serious talk? A silence comes between the two of you. She may have attempted to keep the conversation going in between asking if you wanted coffee and delivering it to you but you didn't notice. Sitting up as a hand is gently placed against your shoulder, she hands over a large mug.

Blowing gently over the top before you take a tentative sip; warmth radiated from the liquid as it slips down your throat. Maeve joins you, perching on the edge of the couch as if she was ready to leave again. Maybe she was now regretting her decision to visit. You were kind of regretting opening the door instead of just going back to sleep instead. Since you were up anyway, might as well make the most of it.

"I can- I can make you breakfast or something if you want? Since you... missed dinner."

"Oh great, yeah," Maeve responds.

"What would you like? Cereal, toast, pancakes maybe?"

"Pancakes would be great." Of course, they would. She had to pick the option that required the most effort. You didn't mind making her something as much as you just didn't want to get up.

"Alright just... give me a moment to wake up."

"You won't wake up if you keep trying to go back to sleep," A snarky remark that earned her a small smile, your middle finger shoots up in response. The two of you just sit in silence together and every few seconds or so you'd take a sip of the coffee she made. It was all feeling a little awkward. Placing the mug down on the coffee table, you rise and get started on making breakfast. Maeve moves from the couch to the kitchen table, fiddling with the little salt and pepper shakers that always resided there. You don't know what to say and clearly, neither does she.

"So... how are things?" You question as you whisk the mixture together.

"I'm fine, I guess" She shrugs a little. You can't help but sigh a little. "What?"

"Nothing," you insist, grabbing the frying pan and place it over a medium heat; Adding a blob of butter and some oil. "If you don't want to talk Maeve then why did you bother to come over?"

Placing down the salt and pepper shaker with a clink, her attention falls to you. "because you asked."

"Yeah, I asked to talk about the other night. You were clearly messed up."

"Why is it so hard to believe I was just looking to fuck?"  It was really hard to believe but rather that you just knew it wasn't true. You were pretty sure Maeve had her choice of partners should she require one. So why come to your door?

"Because I'm not stupid" You pour the mixture into the pan with a satisfying sizzle. "I know you well enough to know that's bull."

"Maybe you don't know me as well as you thought."

Flipping the pancake over, you're taken back by her comment. Did you know Maeve as well as you thought? You had never expected her to just up and leave you one day and she did? She lived an entire superhero life that you knew nothing about. Maeve had always been pretty private when it came to that side of herself. You make another couple of pancakes before serving her up a plate.

"You aren't eating?"

"Too early," you return, taking up the seat opposite her. You watch as her fork pierce the surface of the pancake, cutting off a small piece and pop it into her mouth.

"Taste okay?"

"They're good," Mouth hidden behind the palm of her hand as she mumbled through her food. It lowered a moment later.  "I came over because my job is hard. I was the in the area, I was having a tough day."

"A tough day?" Getting any sort of details out of her was like pulling teeth. Why was she so reluctant to speak to you? If she didn't want to have this conversation she should have just no turned up like she hadn't for dinner. Would have saved the effort and you could be sleeping right now.

"Yeah,"

"That's that then." Hands slap against the table as you rise from the seat. No point in sticking around if this wasn't going anywhere.  "Case closed. When you're finished just leave the plate in the sink, I'm going back to bed."

"Seriously?"

"You woke me up at four am just to tell me you had a bad day. Shit, I have plenty of bad days, I don't show up at Vought tower." You start walking back towards your bedroom although your slow, hesitant even like you were just waiting for an excuse to turn back.

"I really was having a bad day," she repeats. "Really bad. And all I could think about was seeing you." And getting drunk, guess she just conveniently forgot about that part. There were many moments although brief where you were having a hard time and you thought about going to see Maeve. She used to be such a big part of your life it was almost an instinct to return to her for comfort. You never actually did obviously. As pathetic as her explanation was, it brought you back to the dining table. "Can I ask you something?"

"Depends."

"What's the worst thing you could ever imagine?"

"Huh?" What kind of question was that?

"Just answer it,"

Your mouth opens but no answer comes to mind at all. You were more curious about the reason behind it. It's too early for philosophical debates and it had nothing to do with anything you had been talking about. "uh, I don't know... post-apocalyptic zombie invasion, maybe?"

"Can you take this seriously?"

"I am," you huff. It was a stupid question anyway. "Zombies-"

"really freak you out, I remember." Strange thing to remember. It couldn't have come up in conversation often. It was a little funny the small things people remembered about each other. "I meant something that could actually happen though. I've seen some pretty fucked up shit."

"Like what?" She turns to you like she's about to say something but quickly stops herself. Continuing the eat the breakfast you so lovingly prepared. With the way she had been playing with her food, you suspected she no longer wanted it despite having hardly eaten any.

"Being a hero isn't all it's cracked up to be. Sometimes I wish I could just live a normal life or whatever"

"Nothing glamorous about a normal life," You stifle a yawn. "I think I'd rather be adored by millions and save the day but we aren't all lucky enough to have powers."

"Lucky," A bitter laugh. "I wouldn't call myself lucky."

"You're being so weird." You comment, a quirked brow.

"I would rather be adored by one person who truly means it."

"Guess that's all anyone wants. Supe or not."

Her eyes meet yours for a few seconds before dropping. Did she mean you? There was no doubt you had feelings for the woman and very much still did. But you can't imagine it's anything compared to the weirdos who worship the ground she walks on. They obviously didn't really know her and vice versa but still. There was an element of pureness that came with being so dedicated to someone. "You never answered my question."

"I don't know Maeve it's too early..." You grumble. "Do you want me to say something like war or famine or something?"

"Not unless it's the truth."

Everyone wished for world peace. Everyone wanted to feed the hungry. House the homeless. Basic answers that any decent person would come up with. It lacked originality. It lacked feeling. Everyone would probably have a more personal reason."What's yours?"

"Something happening to you... because of me."

"Really? That's the worst thing you can think of?" Didn't she just say she had seen a lot of messed up stuff and yet her concern resided with you? What did she think would happen? And didn't a broken heart technically count as something happening because of her? Shifting in your seat, you lean down onto the table before you. Thinking of your own answer. The worst thing you could imagine?

"I answered," she shrugs but doesn't elaborate. "Now you go."

"I guess... finding out you died," Should you admit something like that? "You're the strongest person I know. I still... care for you. I'm not sure I would handle it well- Is that a better answer?"

"It's sufficient."

"Sufficient? I really don't know what you want from me Maeve? I don't know what the worst thing is, okay? I'm too tired for this shit."

She places her cutlery carefully on the plate, pushing out her seat. "I should go."

"Maeve?"

"I'll go, you can go back to bed. I don't even know why I came here."

"No. Stay. I wanna talk."

" Let's just forget this ever happened." Brushing herself off, Maeve heads back towards the door. This whole back and forth was growing awfully tiresome. Every time you thought you scratched the surface of her mask, there was a new layer underneath more impenetrable than the last. Maybe you should just let her go? It'd be easier. It was probably for the best too but when she had shown up at your door the other night, you realised just how much you still wanted this. Still wanted her. She may have left you one day without any explanation but seeing her for the first time in a long time had brushed all rational thought aside. You were in love with her even now. Tears brimmed your eyes whether it was due to tiredness or a flush of emotions, it was unclear.

"If you walk out that door I'm done," You declare as confidently as you can. Hoping your sadness was hidden amongst the dim light that filled the entire room. "Don't bother showing up on my doorstep when you have a shitty day." Maeve pauses with her hand on the doorknob but only for a second before twisting the handle and pulling open the door. "Maeve...  just tell me what's going on with you, please."

"Everything I have done to you was to protect you." Final words as she leaves. The door clicking behind her. To protect you? From what? What was she even talking about anymore. Anger bubbles deep inside you and you find yourself charging after her. Bursting out into the chilly hallway, you catch her in the corner of your eye. She was leaning against the wall just outside your apartment basking in the flicker of the corridor light.

"Protect me from what?" You wonder quietly, taking a wary step closer. "I don't understand."

"...Homelander." Voice but a whisper mumbled into the darkness. Homelander? The Homelander? Why would you need protection from him, you didn't even know him? Plus he was like a beloved superhero and the last time you checked, superheroes were the good guys.

"You're scared of... the world's greatest superhero?"

"Never meet your heroes."

"Aren't you two like friends? You even dated him. Why are you scared of him?" Another step closer, you lay your hand tenderly on her shoulder. An attempt to support her even if you didn't understand the situation. "He didn't seem so bad when I met him yesterday. I actually spoke with him after."

"You spoke after? Why?" Maeve snarled swiftly making you back away a little only for her hand to snap around your wrist. Cold fingertips apply a deep pressure to your skin as if it's taking everything in her not to press harder. You swallow hard, confused by her anger. "I told you to leave"

"It- it's not a big deal. He just wanted to know more about us," Even you can hear the panic in your voice as you struggle to get the words out. It was a little embarrassing, to say the least, but you'd never really experienced this side of Maeve before. Her anger had never really been directed towards you.

"And you told him?"

"Yeah. He took it pretty well actually, I was surprised. "

"How can you be so fucking stupid?" Her grasp begins to stiffen around your wrist. Maeve was strong, inhumanly so. If she wanted to she could break every one of your bones like it was nothing. That never used to bother you so much but in this instance, your own weakness had never been more apparent.

"Maeve," You struggle against her grip, a pleading look as you meet the brown of her eyes. "...You're scaring me,"

Those magic words seemed to break the spell that had come over her and Maeve released you in an instant. Regret washing off her face in record time. "I'm sorry, okay- I'm sorry," You take a step back; the other hand rubbing at the wrist she just let go off. "I didn't mean to- I wouldn't hurt you."

"I... let's just go back inside." It's hard to pretend that didn't just happen. That Maeve didn't almost crush your wrist for doing the wrong thing. But it wasn't her fault, right? She just isn't herself at the moment. Her emotions got the best of her when she found out you told Homelander about your relationship. Warily, you hold out your hand in offering. It's a little shakey but you just hope she doesn't notice as she takes your hand and you lead the way back into your apartment. Shutting the door behind the two of you, you return to the couch. Sat on either ends so you're as far away as possible without being on the floor, things are feeling a little awkward now. You can't help but focus on your wrist, the feeling of her hand still lingers in a ghostly embrace. "I'm sorry I told Homelander about us."

"You didn't know..."Maeve lets out a heavy sigh as she turns to face you. "Homelander is a monster. He's hurt people just for looking at me funny- "

"Oh." A little surprising to hear. You had always kind of suspected Homelander was a bit of an arsehole but not that he was inherently a bad person. He saves people after all. You've seen him save people. He was basically on the news every other day or in the newspaper or trending on Twitter. There was no evidence to supporting Maeve's theory but you also had no reason not to trust her. She had no reason to lie to you.

"He's done atrocious things. He's made me do atrocious things. I was trying to protect you from him- and from myself,"

"...Why are you telling me this now?" Couldn't she have just told you all this from the beginning? It still didn't explain why she had just shown up the other day either? Clearly, something had happened between her and Homelander at least that's what you gathered from the context.

"To keep you safe," Maeve returns. "So you'll stop hating me."

"I could never hate you," An offer of a faint smile that may or may not betray you. When she had first left you, you were so filled with hatred but it was so hard to stay angry at her. You didn't hate her anymore but you couldn't say you were simply over it now. "It's not your fault."

"It is though- I put you in this situation. I let those people die,"

"What are you talking about? What people?" Every time Maeve opened her mouth you grew slightly more confused and you didn't know how to help. Watching her with an inquisitive eye, you notice as a tear or two begins to glide down her rose-tinted cheeks. It was enough to bring your walls crashing down. Whatever she was talking about must be really affecting her for her to start crying. A hand reaches out only to pull back as you remember what happened last time. You take a deep breath, sitting up a little straighter.

"I should have stood up to him but I was scared."

"Scared of Homelander," You repeat. Still trying to process the information.

"I don't want to be a monster like him." Against your better judgement, this time you shuffle closer and entice her into a soothing hug. Holding onto her tightly like you never wanted to let go because frankly, you didn't. Maeve was warm, she was safe. You wanted to offer her that same sense of comfort even if it was impossible. You wanted to drown in her affection.

"You're not a monster, Maeve" The other woman melts into your caring touch, burying her face in the crook of your neck. You were so used to confident, super-strong Maeve that it was a little weird to have her be so vulnerable. Especially sober. But even your words weren't enough to trick your brain into quelling that twinge of fear that now resides in you. "Whatever's going on, I'm gonna help you get through it. I promise."

[creepytoes88]

WARNING ⚠️- this is absolutely FILTHY like I need to go to church for real. like the last one is rainbows and kittens compared to this one y’all 😰🥴 sorry for any grammar mistakes or miss spelling

PSA- y/n in this smut is a famous TikTok weeb and she doesn’t understand how famous she is yet and Vinnie has a fat Crush on her readers to find out more 😈 and covid doesn’t exist in these obviously

https://youtu.be/NocXEwsJGOQi

Song/dance I’m talking about 👆

Vinnie’s POV

I watch her dance again I’ve watched it 8 or 9 times. Her baby blue thigh high socks and her lace pink skirt. The little bit of thigh poking out between the two driving me crazy the thoughts going right to my downstairs area. I groan and close TikTok I can’t keep thinking these things about y/n it’s not right I then hop out of bed and head downstairs to get some breakfast and coffee. When I get downstairs and step into the kitchen J immediately yells to me from the living room “DID YOU SEE HOW HOT Y/N LOOKS IN HER LAST TIKTOK!” Before I could answer Anthony come out of his room and gets something from the fridge “Avani is coming over and she’s bringing a friend that’s moving in with her, apparently she’s shy so everyone is nice I’m not getting bitched at cause you all couldn’t keep your dicks in your pants and made her uncomfortable” we all nod in agreement I take my muffin and coffee up to my room and watch some tv.

Y/n POV

I take a deep breath as I step off the gate moving to LA was a big move but it’s for the best I skip baggage claim because all of my stuff should be at Avani’s house by now. I pull my phone out of my carry on but before I could call Avani and see if she’s here yet but before I could I hear my name being called I turn around and see some boys around my age coming towards waving at me I wait and we take pictures I say goodbye as we walk away and call Avani’s phone “HEY! DID YOU LAND?!” “Yes I landed, I’ll be out front by the doors come find me.” I laughed as I hung up, It only took 10 minutes for Avani to find me and run at me full speed before nearly taking me and her self to the ground “WOAH!” “So how was your flight?” I laughed “very pleasant” Avani pulled away from me before looking me dead in the eyes. “There’s someone I want you to meet” point, Blank, period that was all she said before grabbing my hand and pulling me to her car. “Not that I don’t appreciate that but I’m not looking for a boyfriend.” Avani stops dead in her tracks before turning around to look at me “Then just fuck him” I stared back at her with a shocked face.

“I- wh- what “she turns back around before pulling me to her car, she unlocks the car and I throw my carry on in the back seat and get in the passenger side. Avani starts the car up then puts her seatbelt on, she turns on her blinker and waits for space so she can get out “well who is it?” I’m a little curious. Avani looks at me and smiles “I know you don’t follow him but maybe you have heard of him” she says with a big smile “his name is Vinnie and he is simply and cutest and sweetest most annoying human being on this earth” she says as she pulls out on to the road heading to her house or so I thought “no I can’t say I have heard of him.” About 30 minutes later she asks if I need to change because we’re gonna stop and pick up her boyfriend and maybe some of his friends then we’re gonna get some food. I thought about it and remembered I brought a mini skirt with me and some thigh high socks along with my doc martens and the sweatshirt I am wearing I think that’ll be fine “no I brought some clothes to change into.”

“Okay cool,” she says we sang to music before pulling in to the expansive looking neighborhood. I guess I should get used to this in a couple of months I’ll be in my own house in an expensive neighborhood just like this one (wink wink 😜) we pull into a house with a bunch of cars in the driveway. I’m kinda nervous for all the people my anxiety starts to kick in a little bit so I take a deep breath “if you want you can change in the car or the bathroom.” I almost agree about changing in the bathroom and for some reason, I change my mind “ it’s ok I’ll just change in the car.” Ok, that’s fine just come in when you are done past the stairs and then you’ll see the living room I’m gonna get Anthony from upstairs.”

She says as she walks away ok this is fine I hurry up and change I slid my socks on before putting my boots on as fast as I possibly could. I put my bag in the trunk in case more people decide to come then just us three I then walk up to the door and take a deep breath I grab the handle and turn it, Of course, it didn’t open. Why would it open, nothing goes right in my life. Great time to make it more awkward for myself, I knock on the door a couple of times and nothing happens so I do it again. Still nothing I take a deep breath before pushing the doorbell great just great I think to myself. I hear someone yell and I stand up straight and got ready to start explaining myself especially if Avani wasn’t the one to open the door. Not a second later a BEAUTIFUL man opens the door, soft brown eyes with hints of green and long eyelashes, rosy cheeks, and big red lips. Even his unruly curly hair was beautiful. I had to tilt my head back to look up at him ( you can change this if you are tall we love tall queens here) his eyes meet mine and Immediately his face changes from confusion, shock and then finally he hits the ground.

Vinnie’s POV

After I finished my breakfast I hopped in the shower and made a TikTok (the one where he has a towel wrapped around his waist) I then put on some sweats and walked downstairs I saw Jordan and Kio playing on the x box so I laid on the other couch before falling asleep. However, I woke up to the sound of Kio screaming my name I look up at him “will you go answer the door I’m about to win.” I groaned as I got up to answer the door I looked out of the peephole and saw nothing but the top of a head with pigtails on it “what the fuck” I said to myself chuckling and I opened the door to see a girl and as she looks up at me I immediately realized who it is and then everything went black.

Y/n POV

I look down as he lays on the ground unconscious I gasp before calling Avani’s name all of a sudden three boys come out of nowhere. “I don’t know what happened he opened the door and when he saw me he passed out” the boys looked at me with wide eyes before they started to laugh and make fun of the boy on the ground for being “whipped” and a “simp” I just look at them shocked “YOUR FRIEND IS PASSED OUT ON THE GROUND AND YOU'RE CALLING HIM A SIMP!!?” The boys stop and take their friend to the couch about that time Avani comes running down the stairs “ OMG Y/N ARE YOU OK I HEARD YOU SCREAMING!” “Yea the door was locked and that guy answered it and then just passed out when he saw me.”

Avani let’s out a load laugh “what the fuck is wrong with y’all” I say with a scared look on my face. “THAT'S VINNIE!” Avani yells as she laughs “he has the biggest crush on you and he passed out when he saw you OF COURSE WE’RE GONNA LAUGH!” She says almost crying “that’s Vinnie,” I say with wide eyes he’s fucking beautiful I think to myself. Maybe I will fuck him I laugh at my own joke I turn around as I hear one of the boys say “welcome back simp” I hear him groan. ”You guys I thought I just saw Y/n but I am pretty sure I was just still asleep, tell that girl I’m sorry please I’m gonna go lay down,” he says as he gets up slowly “you should put some ice on that bump.” You say as you walk towards him he looks up at you with wide eyes “don’t pass out again, please.”

I say with my hands out in front of me to push him back if he falls forward “ I-I I’m ok really.” He says as he scratches the back of his head “well show me where the kitchen is and I’ll get you an ice pack.” I saw with a smile “oh good luck we don’t have those here.” Vinnie says with a laugh “I got this don’t worry” I say with a wink. We walk into the kitchen and as he sits at the island I look around for a ziplock and fill it with ice, then wrap a rag around it. I walk towards Vinnie and hand it to him “thank you” he says with a smile while looking into my e/c eyes I stare back at him I don’t know how much time went by with us staring into each other's eyes but Avani walks in and laughs.

“Alright you two do you guys wanna stay here and we’ll bring you back food all the guys wanna come and we only have 5 seats sooo?”

I turn to look back at Vinnie “is that fine with you?” He looks at me and smiles “ I would love that” he says as he looks in my eyes again I take a deep breath staring back at him. I look at his beautiful lips his smile is just everything. “okay well text me what you guys want and we’ll be back in a couple of hours have fun, but not too much fun.” she says laughing I roll my eyes and look back at Vinnie “does your head feel any better?” “Yea actually” he pulls the ice back from his head and throws it in the sink “wanna watch a movie with me,” he asked with a smile “yes absolutely but first do you wanna film a couple of TikTok's together?”

I ask with puppy dog eyes “yes!” Vinnie says with no hesitation my eyes widened in shock at how fast he said yes “ok great. Well where should we film?” Vinnie thinks and asks if I wanted to film in his room or by the pool “hmmm the pool” I bet the sun is about to set “ok come, on silly girl,” Vinnie says as he walks away I run after him to see him go through a door so I follow and I see the big ass pool, I was right the sun is going down “wow,” I say to myself “it’s so beautiful right” Vinnie says with a smile “yea it’s is beautiful.” “Not as beautiful as you though,” Vinnie says with a slight blush on his cheeks I turn and look at him before walking towards him. I stand on my tippy toes to kiss him on the cheek I feel Vinnie put his hands on my waist “come on before the sun goes down” Vinnie and I make a couple of dancing tiktoks and we decided to make a thirst trap on his account so we went to his bathroom.

Vinnie started the video in front of the mirror by himself and then he transitioned to where I’m standing in front of him holding the phone. The next transition was me sitting on his sink counter as he takes his finger and snaps my thigh high sock against my thigh he laughs at my shocked face before ending the video he watches the video back with his hand still on my thigh. His thumb drawing small circles on the outside of my thigh I just stare at him I could feel my heart thumping and butterflies in my stomach going straight to my heat I can’t be thinking about him like that we just met an hour ago tops. Vinnie looks down at me his eyes then trail from my eyes to my lips he licks his own lips “V-Vinnie” “ yes beautiful?” He asks “what are you thinking about?” Vinnie looks me in the eyes again and says “About how great you’re going to taste.”

My eyes widen in shock and I put my hands on his shoulders to stabilize myself I can’t do this I shouldn’t be feeling this way I barely know this man “V-Vinnie?” Vinnie looks down at me “what baby?” I move my hands to the back of his neck “kiss me please” Vinnie didn’t waste any time attaching his lips to mine he grabs at my waist and chest. I nibble on his lips teasing him he opens his mouth for me but I denied it and keep biting and teasing him. However Vinnie grew tired of my teasing he picks me up off the counter, he then rubs the little but of ass that’s poking out I gasp as he does, Vinnie takes the opportunity to slide his tongue into my mouth, I can feel my heat throbbing against his rock-hard abs, my legs pulling Vinnie even closer to me and I start to grind my hips against his toned stomach and I let out little moans between kisses.

Before I realized what was going on he drops me on his bed immediately my legs fall apart and I reach my hands up to grab him but Vinnie is too busy staring at my cheeky white Lace panties with a cute pink bow at the top. I grow self-conscious I remember that I’m probably a little prickly down there and begin to close my legs, maybe this isn’t a good idea right now “don’t close your legs baby I think you are gorgeous.” He says with a sweet smile and lays his hands on my knees resting them there “I-I haven’t shaved in a couple of days and I-“ “I don’t care” Vinnie says with a duh face as a smile creeps on his Lips “as long as you keep you’re skirt and socks on I’m happy.” I give him a weird look and Vinnie looks back at me with an open mouth “ unless that makes you uncomfortable-“ “no I’m just curious as to why” I say with a smile “god I hope I don’t make myself sound like a creepy stalker” Vinnie says as he takes a deep breath “I have been following you for at least a year now and I have always had a crush on you I've had dreams about fucking you in a skirt with your socks on” he says really fast a deep blush on his cheeks.

“You just make it look so hot with your thick thighs and bubble butt-“ I take my sweatshirt off before he could finish ”so no shirt?” Vinnie looks at my boobs with his mouth open just staring “n- no” he clears his throat “ no bra huh” he says with a small smile “that’s a nice surprise” his eyes trailing down my naked chest “you can touch them if you want.” I say with a smile Vinnie immediately pushes my legs open and lays between them he then grabs both of my boobs in his hands and pinches my nipples with his thumbs and pointer fingers. I let out a whimper and grab his strong biceps I can feel his muscles flexing in his arm every time he squeezed or rubbed my boobs and nipples I began to rock my hips against his stomach again “c-can I lick them?” He asks in a small voice I throw my head back and let out a moan “YES PLEASE” Vinnie takes one of my nipples in his mouth and sucks harshly and pinches the other with his ring-covered hand as he begins to grind his bulge against me.

I gasp as he nibbles and sucks before moving on to the other nipple I run my hands through his hair I know I’m fucking it up but it’s so soft. I feel his lips trailing down my stomach I open my eyes and look down at him and the first thing is seeing is a bunch of big and little red mark all over my boobs and tummy “you left hickeys!!?!” Vinnie looks up and then looks down I see the blush creep on his cheeks and he looks down “well it’s too late now” I say with a breathy laugh “just keep going” Vinnie’s eyes light up before he went back to leaving hickeys on my hips. “Please vin” Vinnie looks up at me “can I” he looks down and then looks back up at me “yes, please do“ I laugh as I run my thumb over his bottom lip. Vinnie kisses the palm of my hand As he then kisses my lips again he rubs and squeezes my thighs for a while before pulling away to unlace my boots once he got both off he spreads my legs wide and looks at my panties that are soaked with my excitement.

I throw my hands over my eyes I know there’s a wet spot I just know it “Jesus baby all this for me” he says as he runs his pointer finger over my wet panties “you even made a mess on my bed baby.” Vinnie says as he kisses the inside of my thigh leaving hickeys I groan in pleasure and embarrassment my cheeks glowing red. Vinnie’s eyes shoot up to look at me and I can feel him smile against my thigh before switching to the other side I moan as I feel my walls clench around nothing. I can feel my wetness gush a little and I throw my head back whining and moaning Vinnie’s name. I feel Vinnie push his nose against my heat, he takes a deep breath through his nose, he groans as he licks his lips pulling away “you smell delicious baby, I bet you taste delicious too.” Vinnie leans his head down taking my underwear in his teeth and pulling them down my legs once they were fully off Vinnie pushes my legs apart and pushes my knees up so they are by my shoulders he can see EVERYTHING.

Vinnie keeps looking down eyes locked on one certain area I could feel him looking at it.“Maybe one day if you get lucky” I say with a smirk ( let me know if you would be interested in part 2 with✨anal✨😊) Vinnie blushes and then realizes what I said before smirking and leaning down between my thighs. Vinnie licks a stripe from my wetness to my clit he groans before shoving his tongue as far into me as possible “mmmm baby you taste like fucking candy.” he slurps and nibbles I gasp and run my hand in his hair “how is that even fucking possible?!” He groans “I could live down here.” he says as he shoves his long tongue into me yet again but this time he grazed a special spot making me release a small shout in shock.

“O-OH VINNIE YESSS DO THAT AGAIN!” I yell as I push his head down and grind my hips on his face at the same time basically using his face to get off. Vinnie pulls my hands off his head after a few minutes and pulls away “n-no keep going-“ “sit on my face please.” Vinnie says as stands up and pulls me towards him by my legs. “Why-“ “because I asked nicely,” he says with a cheeky smile looking down at me, so I sit up and get on my knees Vin lays down on his bed and gets comfortable he then reaches out to me with both hands. I take them and slowly shuffle my way up, when I finally am above his face and I start to lower myself Vinnie grabs my thighs and pushes me so all of my body weight is on his face ”mmmmmm baby! “Vinnie moans inside of me I moan and try to get away from his torturous tongue and vibrations that’s making my legs weak I don’t have the strength to fight him anymore and I fully sit.

Immediately he starts eating me out twice as fast and deep he starts rubbing my clit with his nose while he moans. He’s squeezing and slapping my ass with the other hand “OH OH GOD YES VINNIE JUST LIKE THAT.” I was humping his face at this point I don’t even realize he wasn’t holding me down anymore and it was me I thrust my hips a couple more times before calling out to him.“YES VINNIE MAKE ME CUM DADDY MAKE ME CUM ON YOUR BEAUTIFUL FACE!!” I yell with my head thrown back “do you want me to cum on your tongue daddy?!” Ask in a whimper Vinnie groans in response to the vibration shoving me over the edge. I throw my head back so hard I fall off of Vinnie’s mouth onto the bed still moaning and whining, Vinnie jumps up and attacks my pussy with his mouth again.

Before my high is gone making me scream again and thrust against his face once more before I lay with my legs and mouth open gasping for breath. “Are you ok” I didn’t have it in me to talk so I just gave him two thumbs up Vinnie laughs before asking “are you down for another round?” My eyes widen and I look at him before I answer I take a good look at his hair all over the place lips red and plump my juices on his face. My eyes then got distracted but his god-like features my eyes taking extra long to graze over his v-line and his rock hard cock. I take my hand and run my fingers down his hard stomach feeling all the bumps and grooves down to his happy trail and I follow it to his sex Lines. I push Vinnie down on the bed before crawling in between his legs I begin to kiss his neck and leave hickeys as he did on me.

I lick his nipple on the way down and he lets out a surprised gasp grabbing onto one of my pigtails as I trail my lips and tongue down to his hip bones to leave hickeys there and on his sex lines. He trusted his hips up towards my face and let out a hot whine so I pull down his sweats and underwear in one go I immediately start to rub my thumb on his tip. I lick the vain from the bottom to the top and then I took his balls in my mouth as I stroke him Vinnie's head thrown back in pure pleasure “ple-please don’t stop” he says in an airy breath I pull off from his balls making a popping sound. I then take him in my mouth if there is one thing I’m good at its blowjobs the bigger the better and Vinnie is the biggest I've ever seen.

I suck the tip and make my way back down as far as I can go without deep throating him yet I got about halfway down his cock I then started to hum and move my tongue around what I could reach. I then began to deep throat Vinnie and as my throat was expanding to his size I couldn’t help but moan “F-FUCK.” Vinnie yells as he grabs both of my pigtails and shoves my head the rest of the way down making me choke “OH MY GOD! I’m so sorry-“ I moaned before doing it again myself my eyeballs rolling to the back of my head I then pull off and catch my breath. “Mmhm fuck my throat daddy” I say as I start to suck his tip again with big wide innocent eyes Vinnie’s hips snap against my face his hands grabbing my pigtails again fucking my throat.

I could feel his balls slapping against my chin and I grab them in one hand and start to massage them while I rub his thigh with my other hand. I feel his balls start to tighten and his tip twitched so I pull off “lay down I wanna Fuck you.” I say with confidence “I-I ok” Vinnie stutters laying on his back now as I straddle him. I take him and put his tip at my entrance before starting to sink down on him I let out a small moan as Vinnie let out a load moan as he grips the sheets trying to keep him self from pushing you down. ”Fuck Y/n your so fucking tight, I’m gonna explode” “ooooh yea, you gonna cum in me daddy or are you gonna put your baby’s on my thighs instead hmmmm maybe on my ass cheeks?” Vinnie let’s out a loud moan “any-anywhere baby please just let me cum” Vinnie groans “mmm fuck me baby.“

I say I feel him grab my ass cheeks before thrusting up into me at a super-fast pace. Vinnie groans and moans as I scream and moan “ahh are you gonna cum in my little pu-pussy daddy?” “Mmmm yes baby I’m gonna paint your walls with my seed.” Vinnie says as he pounds into me at an even fastest pace if that’s possible. “I’m gonna shoot my load so far up your pussy it’s gonna be coming out of you for days!” He yells as he grabs my neck and licks my face we are both groaning and yelling things at each other. “HIT ME DADDY HIT ME” I yell I’ve never asked someone to hit me before so this is new.

Vinnie without even thinking about it throws me on my back and slaps me across the face. I could feel the stinging sensation and my pussy throbbed so I whimpered “again” he slapped me across my face again. I moan even loader this time I could feel the knot starting to twist “AGAIN DADDY SLAP MY FACE AGAIN AN-AND CALL ME YOUR LITTLE SLUT!” I scream at Vinnie so he slaps my face again harder this time. I could really feel the sting that time I let out a cry but immediately moaned right after “YOU LIKED THAT DIDN’T YOU SLUT” he pounds into harder. I let out sobs of pleasure tears running down my face.

Vinnie then pulls out completely before flipping me on to my hands and knees, I immediately drop my head to the bed so my ass is in the air. I feel Vinnie push inside of me again this time from the back, he grabs my hips thrusting in to me at a fast pace ”DADDYS GONNA SLAP YOUR ASS TILL ITS PRETTY AND PINK” Vinnie shouts at me as he begins to abuses my ass cheeks with his open palms I push back on him and I moan my eyes rolling to the back of my head ”P-P-PLEASE DADDY CUM INSIDE OF ME I WANT TO BE YOUR SLUT !” I scream at the top of my lungs I can feel the knot about to pop “F-FUCK YOUR SUCH A DIRTY LITTLE SLUT YOU WANT ME TO CUM IN YOUR TIGHT LITTLE WHORE PUSSY!” He moans “SUCH A DIRTY SLUT FUCKING A MAN YOU MET TWO HOURS AGO AND ALREADY ASKING ME TO PUT BABIES INSIDE OF YOU!” He shouts as I let out a scream it was like everything stopped my mind went blank all I could think about was how good daddy’s cock felt inside of my slutty little pussy.

I hear Vinnie start to pant “I’m gonna-I’m-I’m CUMMING” he yells as he grabs my boobs and falls into my neck his hot breath on my neck. I wrap my arms around his waist and I start to rub his back “thank you, Vinnie.” He starts laughing “I should be thanking you I don’t think my dick will get hard for another woman ever again.” I laugh and give him a tight hug “you know I don’t actually think you're a whore right “ I look at him and smile “well I would hope not considering you had sex with a complete stranger too” I kiss him on the lips “will you go on a date with me y/n?” I smile at him “yes, absolutely I would love to!” He chuckles and kisses my lips “I never thought I was gonna meet you, or be going in a date with you. let alone have sex with you AND cum inside of you all in the same day, life is full of surprises” he says with a big smile. I smile back at him before kissing him once more and getting comfortable “will you take a nap with me?” “Yea of course my sweet girl.” Vinnie says with a kiss on the head.

[snowywrites]

Doki Doki Literature Club Girls x Reader

summary: you spend the day at the amusement park with the rest of the Literature Club! (it's recommended to read these together in order because they are connected, but if you prefer then you can read just whichever one you want to. Reader is intended to be female.)

full word count: 7.7k

Sayori

It was a gorgeous Saturday morning in town. The sun was shining high overhead in the pale blue sky, but the fluffy white clouds drifting by here and there were enough to ensure that it wasn't too hot. There also happened to be a nice, soothing breeze out, you note to yourself as you gaze out your open window to the neighborhood. A perfectly lovely day.

Well. That was enough of that, you muse to yourself as you slide your window closed again and pull the curtains in front of it to avoid any of the cheery sunshine washing into your room- it created an awful glare off of your computer screen which made it hard to watch your anime.

Content with your decision to stay inside today and catch up on your favorite shows, you walk over to sit down at your desk and turn on your computer. That's as far as you get before the doorbell rings, however.

You ignore it for now, assuming someone else in the house will go answer it. Then you suppress a groan of frustration when you recall that you're home alone for the better part of the day, a big reason why you had set the date aside to stay indoors and enjoy some peace, quiet, relaxation, and anime.

The doorbell rings again and again, much more insistent now; it almost could be playing a song of some kind. "I'm coming!" You call as if the visitor can hear you, grudgingly hopping up and hurrying downstairs. The doorbell just keeps ringing, and you don't even check the peephole to see who it is before you open up because the sound is really starting to grate on your nerves and you just need it to stop as soon as possible.

Your neighbor and somewhat-best-friend Sayori is standing there, and she looks a little shocked to see you, despite this being your house. She slowly presses the doorbell one last time, and you resist the urge to sigh heavily.

"Hi, Sayori. What's up?" You question. It's been a minute since you two have visited outside of the Literature Club, so you're making an effort not to act as annoyed as you feel for being so rudely disrupted. She could have at least texted a message saying she was going to be dropping by- then again, this was Sayori. Odds were, she had been walking by heading to the store or something and spotted your home, causing her to make the impulsive decision to bug you.

Her eyes brighten and a wide smile replaces her startled expression. "Hey, Y/N! It's Saturday!"

You stare at her for a moment. "Uhm...yeah, it is." You aren't entirely sure what she's expecting from you- maybe an invitation to come inside? Sayori's sort of a pain to watch movies or shows with, though. She's such a chatterbox and can't really focus on one thing for long at all, so whenever she does tune back in, she's got a million dumb questions that she'd know the answer to if only she'd bothered to pay attention. Nonetheless, you offer, "Did you wanna hang out? I was about to watch some anime, and you can join me, if you'd like."

Your words don't seem to come as any shock to Sayori, and she shakes her head firmly. "Y/N! I figured you were shutting yourself up in here. It's seriously a nice day, let's get out and have some fun!"

So much for compromising! And you'd even been trying to be nice, sheesh. "But I-" You frowned, trying to come up with an excuse for why you couldn't go out today, eventually settling on the truth since it was easiest. "I was just looking forward to some downtime, maybe next time though, okay?"

Instantly Sayori is pouting, acting like the exact same little kid you first met years ago rather than the almost-adult she was. "We've had this talk before, I don't want you becoming a total NEET! You can watch your shows tomorrow, but we really should enjoy this day, I bet it's gonna rain tomorrow! I mean, the rain is fun too, but-"

You're visibly defeated. "Okay, okay, lemme just grab some money. What'd you have in mind?"

Instead of calming down now that she's gotten her way, Sayori gives an excited little bounce, clapping her hands together. "Thanks, Y/N!" She grins at you, radiating warmth and energy. "I was thinking the amusement park!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The amusement park was in town for another few days, and you had yet to go to it, but you doubted you were missing out on much. It was crowded with people, as expected, and you recognized a lot of other people from your school even in their casual clothes. It made you absently wonder if any of the other girls in the Literature Club were here today...

"Hey, did you hear me?"

Sayori's voice shakes you out of your thoughts, and you look over at her. "Oh, sorry. What'd you say?"

She doesn't seem upset in the slightest. "I said, we have to go on the roller coaster!" She points excitedly across the park where you can see the top of the coaster. A lot of screams and a long line are in that direction, and you do your best not to look nervous.

"R-Roller coaster? Isn't there anything else you want to do first?" Trust Sayori to immediately pick the biggest attraction in the place. You're a tad surprised she isn't already hungry, to be honest, though you two did just enter the park.

"Coaster first!" Insists your best friend, taking your hand and beginning to drag you off towards the ride in spite of your clear hesitance. "And then probably food! I'd hate to get sick, you know?"

You can't help but smile. It was likely the most responsible thing you'd ever heard Sayori say, and one which you were grateful for considering you two would obviously be sitting next to each other. It helps you to relax a little bit too, but as you join the line with her, you can feel your anxiety starting to mount yet again the closer and closer you get.

Sayori is chattering away, but you're trying to block her out because she's babbling about all sorts of things. You wonder suddenly if she's trying to distract you...but quickly brush that assumption away. It would be nice, but Sayori just tended to talk a lot all the time, this wasn't new.

After what feels like much too short of a time, it's your turn to ride the roller coaster. Fear grips you, much as you don't want to admit it. You shoot a panicked glance at Sayori, who was humming cheerfully to herself. She meets your gaze, and her hum falters, tapering off. She gives you a reassuring and oddly quiet smile, taking your hand. It's different than before, when she'd been pulling you through the park. This time, her grip is steady but not demanding, allowing you to pull away if you wanted to do so. It's also possibly the only time you can recall ever seeing your best friend look so...shy.

It's more comforting than anything she could've said, and you give her hand a squeeze to thank her. The two of you enter the roller coaster in seats next to each other, and a worker comes along to help the two of you strap in properly. Your heart feels like it's about to burst out of your chest, and you're assuming it's just because of the roller coaster adrenaline, nothing more.

The ride starts and you close your eyes shut tight, keeping a death grip on Sayori now; you can hear her breathless and excited laughter even through the sounds of the other riders screaming and whooping. Many twists and turns, sometimes slow and sometimes fast yet always nerve-wracking, and a particularly terrifying drop-off later, and the ride is over.

You blink open your eyes, stunned to realize you're still in once piece, and leap out of the coaster as soon as possible, tearing your hand out of Sayori's. She doesn't seem all that worried about it, fortunately. She climbs out onto the solid and safe ground next to you, and you bite back a giggle. Her hair is so crazy and windswept and sticking out in all directions from the ride, but then you figure yours probably is too, and self-consciously try to pat it down.

Unlike you, Sayori doesn't appear concerned with her appearance, her cheeks flushed with delight and invigoration, not embarrassment. "That was so much fun!" She cheers, spinning around you as if she still had too much energy to contain. Then she paused, practically glowing as she looked at you and you only had a heartbeat to notice that she was very close in your personal space. "Thank you so much for coming with me, Y/N."

It was such a genuine and vulnerable statement that you were briefly at a loss for words, trying to read the uncharacteristically intense emotions shining in your friend's blue eyes. "I- it was, sure, it was a lot of fun, Sayori..." You trail off awkwardly, stepping back a pace to escape the close proximity.

Sayori opens her mouth to say something else, but a gasp comes out first as her attention fixes on something behind you. "Can you buy me some pizza? Pleeeeaaaaseeeee? Pretty please?! I'm really hungry now!"

The moment is over with that, and you wince at her childish request. "Pizza sounds good," you relent, causing Sayori to squeal with excitement and rush off to the food stand. You're giving in a lot today, and you aren't sure why, honestly. It wasn't like this was more fun than staying home and watching your favorite shows, right? Although, you did enjoy Sayori's company. There was a reason she was your kind-of-best-friend after all.

Oh, well. You can think about it later. For now you might as well try to have a nice time while you were still here. You follow after your puppy-like friend, spotting her at one of the tables just outside of the food stand talking with someone sitting there. With a start, you recognize the violet long hair of your fellow clubmate, Yuri.

Approaching, you start to greet them, but Sayori interrupts you before you can. "Yeah, Y/N/'s here too!" She pointed at you brightly, and Yuri tenses up, looking up at you like a deer in the headlights, which confuses you. Yuri had seemed perfectly calm before now- sure, a little shy, but now she was the stuttering and nervous girl that you were most familiar with from the Literature Club.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

Yuri

You smile, giving a tiny wave. "Hey there, Yuri." Of all the people you might have expected to see here at the amusement park, Yuri was perhaps at the bottom of the list. You would have assumed she would be like you on a Saturday, preferring to stay at home. Except she would be reading novels or writing most likely, not watching anime or reading manga.

You're partly right, because on the table in front of Yuri is an open book instead of anything to eat. How she was able to focus with all the conversation of groups of people swarming around, you had no idea.

"Y/N," whined Sayori after Yuri just gave you a slight nod of greeting, "My pizzaaaaa, please?"

You laugh, waving her away. "I'm going, I'm going, hush! Yuri, did you want anything?" You offered politely.

Your clubmate seems to shrink in on herself, allowing her long dark hair to fall so that it hid her face from your view a bit. "Ah-! Uhm, that's okay, thank you, though." Sometimes you weren't sure how she could write just long and beautifully-worded poems when she seemed to struggle so much with the simplest of phrases spoken outloud.

You accept this and go to buy yourself and Sayori a slice of pizza each, and end up buying Yuri a sweet tea too just because, well, you would feel weird and rude to eat in front of someone else if they didn't have anything. You make your way back over to the table where Sayori is talking to Yuri, her arms flailing around in wild gestures, and you get the suspicion that she's telling Yuri all about the roller coaster ride. Quick to intervene, you set the tray with the food and drinks down on the table, leaning towards Sayori threateningly. "What exactly are you talking about?" You inquire sharply, eyes narrowed.

Sheepishly, Sayori swipes one of the plates with pizza on it to take a bite and shrug, using the food as an excuse not to reply.

Huffing, you distribute the stuff you bought between the three of you, turning to Yuri to protect your reputation. "For the record, I was totally not scared," you promised her.

Yuri is slightly more comfortable now, you think, and there's a tiny glimmer of faint amusement and sympathy in her violet eyes. "I believe you," she murmurs back, so quietly that you almost were unable to catch that. She blinks at the drink that you placed in front of her, apparently having to take a second to process what it meant. And then, completely the opposite of Sayori, her head snapped towards you and her gaze was now wide. "Oh-! You- thank you, Y/N, but- you really, didn't have to, go through the trouble...!"

You tuck into your meal, taking your time in replying while Sayori scarfs down her own food, curiously glancing between you and Yuri as if studying the interaction. "It's no worries," you say after a short while. "I would've felt bad otherwise since me and Sayori have something." You turn your attention to the forgotten book in front of Yuri. "Sorry if we bothered you, by the way! We didn't mean to interrupt your reading or anything."

Sayori bobbed her head in an enthusiastic agreement since her mouth was full and she couldn't say anything.

Once again, you worried that you'd said the wrong thing because Yuri's reaction was much the same as the last time you'd said anything. "That's- that's okay, really! It wasn't, important, and I was..." She seems to give up, seeming helpless and frustrated with herself, only able to take a sip of her drink in defeat.

Sayori finished with her food, standing up abruptly. "Thanks, Y/N!" She chirps, apparently not effected by your and Yuri's awkwardness. "I'm gonna go check out some other stuff, so you should have fun with Yuri!"

Her words catch you off guard, and before you can react or suggest the three of you find something to do together, Sayori is already racing off somewhere, waving over her shoulder at the two of you. You watch as she slams into someone as she wasn't paying any attention to where she was going, and shake your head as she profusely apologizes to them. "Oh, Sayori," you sigh a little dramatically to Yuri. "What are we gonna do with her?"

The other girl bites her lip like she's trying to hold back a laugh. "It's nice that you look after her," she speaks up quietly.

"Ah- I mean, somebody has to, right?" You chuckle to yourself as you resume eating.

Yuri is fine with silence, which doesn't really surprise you. She opens her book back up and starts to read after a minute or two, and you're content too to just finish up your pizza and do some people-watching.

Eventually when you do finish, you throw away your trash and then rejoin Yuri, who's politely closing her book again and standing up as well. She's calmer now, as if reading and not having to engage in conversation for a little bit has recharged her, which you're happy for. "Uhm..." She begins timidly. "Would you like to walk around the park with me?"

You aren't used to Yuri initiating anything at all, and in the space of your bewilderment, she hurriedly continues, "It's okay if you'd rather not-! I only thought..it might be fun, but I understand if..." The last part is more of a mumble.

"Sure, Yuri, I'd love to!" You try to reassure her as smoothly and swiftly as you can in order to avoid hurting her feelings any further or even risking her fleeing. Yuri was such a sweet person, and you'd never want to say no to her and have to see her awfully sad expression, you reflect. "We can head...that way." You pick a random direction and start walking, Yuri following you meekly. She walks near you, but also just a step or two behind, and when you try to slow down so you guys can actually walk together, she stops altogether. Deciding you can't do anything about it for now, you continue the trek, absently looking around at the various stands, games, and rides as you pass them. "I wasn't expecting to run into you here, to be honest," you comment.

Yuri's silent for a beat, causing you to wonder if she was even going to say anything back to that. She finally does, thankfully. "Admittedly, this isn't the sort of place I might usually spend a weekend at." Her words are low and carefully-chosen as usual, like she's cursed to overthink even the barest minimum of small talk. "But my parents insisted I come here."

An amused smile quirks up your lips as you glance back at her. "So you brought a book instead of arguing with them?" You deduct. "Clever. I would've brought a manga or something, but Sayori was impatient to get here. She's always trying to drag me out my house and make me socialize. Take the Literature Club, for example."

Yuri gives you a tiny nod. "It's kind of them to care about us," she says. "I do sometimes wish they could understand me better, though."

"I get that," you agree. "Even if they're a pain sometimes, you love them anyway."

Yuri evidently agrees, but something causes her to stop walking. You pause too, going back to join her. Her attention is on an attraction nearby, a 'haunted house' sort of place. She doesn't look like she had any idea it was here, and you recognize interest and anticipation on her face, which makes you happy- you might be getting a little bit better at reading Yuri, the more time you spend with her.

She reluctantly focuses back on you, and you sense she's about to apologize and continue walking, so you speak before she gets the chance. "We can go check it out, if you want?"

Your clubmate lights up for a moment before wincing. "We don't have to, if you wouldn't like it," is her answer. It's honestly not annoying, mainly because Yuri makes indecisiveness, shyness, and doormat-ness look really, really cute.

"It might be fun," you laugh, guiding her across to the entrance. It looks pretty stereotypical, and you recall going to one of these kinds of places with Sayori one year for Halloween when you were much, much younger, probably like 11 or 12. The line isn't long at all, which is also a bonus. When you two are given the all clear to go inside, you and Yuri enter the narrow, dark hallway.

You're suddenly quite aware of how close Yuri is as you walk- instead of trailing behind, she's right at your side now, pressed up against you since there's not a ton of room in this corridor. She doesn't seem to notice, too enraptured (ha, maybe you were hanging around her too much) by the thrill of what scares might await them to pay you much mind.

Talk about making a girl feel self-conscious. Despite being around the same age, Yuri was so much more...mature than you, to put it politely. It was nice in a way too- you felt safer than if you were by yourself, at the very least, since she was taller than you and so close to you.

The haunted house wasn't too scary, like you had assumed. The actors were great though, and at some point one of them lunged out towards you from a secret passageway and it startled you so badly that you ended up leaping backwards and pressing back against Yuri, your eyes wide and your heart hammering so loudly you bet the violet-haired girl had no trouble hearing it.

You stared tensely at the 'monster', needing a moment to collect yourself and remember how to breathe again. It's Yuri that manages to bring you out of it, which is so sweet of her since you all but crashed into the poor girl. She wraps her arms around you in a very gently hug, resting her chin on your hair. Where did all that confidence come from, anyway? It may have been the really dim lighting, you think to yourself- you can hardly see each other, so that could've given Yuri some boldness. Either that or she was finally getting comfortable around you!

The actor slowly recedes away, and you stay perfectly still for a minute longer than necessary. Finally, you clear your throat, awkwardly disentangling yourself from Yuri, who hops away from you quickly too, and even in the near-pitch black you could swear that she's blushing like crazy as she tries to stammer out an apology.

You shake your head, smiling nervously even though she can't see it. "T-Thanks, Yuri."

Okay, so maybe you had lied a little bit about it being 'not too scary.'

That was the last of the real scares, and you gladly spring out into the sunlight of day again, stretching your arms over your head. You look back to see Yuri hovering back in the darkness of the haunted house- was she okay? You ask your thought outloud.

"Y-Yes! I'm sorry. I'm coming..." She grudgingly steps out to join you in the real world, and you realize with a sense of deep sadness that she's not meeting your gaze anymore again. Great, just when you finally thought you were starting to make some progress on being friends with her. "That was a nice time, thank you very much, Y/N-" Those next words are blurted out and spoken so fast you're shocked she doesn't stutter over them. And the next thing you know, she's gone, disappearing into the crowds and leaving you alone and more than a little disappointed and confused.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

Natsuki

You sigh to yourself as you wander around the amusement park, scanning around to see if anything piques your interest. You were also sort of hoping to see Sayori, considering she was responsible for dragging you here and now she'd ditched you, but you also wouldn't mind bumping into Yuri again to hang out. Something told you that Yuri had been pushed to her social interaction limit for the day though.

A loud, squeaky, angry, and oh-so-familiar voice causes you to head towards it and check out what's happening. As you thought, it's Natsuki, another of the girls in the Literature Club. She's standing at one of the game stands with her hands on her hips and leaning towards the guy running the game in an aggressive stance. You note that the game is one of those ones where you have to throw some darts at a balloon, and if you can pop one, you can get a prize. The prizes line the wall behind the man (more like disinterested teenage boy, but close enough), and they all are varying degrees of fluffy and cute stuffed animals. You never were a fan of amusement park games because they were more often than not rigged more than a claw machine.

You get a little closer so that you can hear better.

"...completely unfair! I hit that balloon, you and I both saw it!" Hisses Natsuki at the worker. It was too easy to compare her to a puffed up and angry kitten, you muse to yourself.

The boy shrugs. "Look, kid, if the balloon doesn't pop, then you don't get a prize. That's like, our only rule."

Fury flashes across Natsuki's face, and you resist the urge to laugh. Natsuki did look pretty young, but she was around your age, and probably this guy's age too. "Don't call me 'kid'!" She exclaims. "I won, fair and square! Just because it didn't-"

The argument was starting to draw in other bystanders, not just yourself. And you realize with a flicker of fear that you can see the worker reach for his walkie-talkie like he's going to call in security. Security on Natsuki, for god's sake. Ridiculous.

To prevent her from possibly being forcibly removed from the amusement park, you hurry over and place some money down on the game stand stable. "Can I try?" You interject. Even though you're not looking at Natsuki, you can feel her flinch away from you and sense her hostility and surprise at this new turn of events.

The boy running the stand regards you boredly, but you're relieved to see him put the walkie-talkie down. "Sure. That'll get you three tries."

Beside you, Natsuki scoffs. "As if you can hit one of them!" She grumbles. "It's not as easy as it looks." By how frustrated she was acting, you could guess that she'd been here the better part of the day attempting to win. But which prize did she have her eye on?

"Maybe not, but I can give it a shot," you say lightly. "Which one are we after?" You question her.

Natsuki glares at you fiercely, and you can see she's got a blush that matches her hair. Grudgingly, she points towards one of the bigger stuffed animals, a white bunny rabbit near the very top. "It's- it's not for me!" She informs you at once. "I wanted it for- for a friend. That's all."

'She's a terrible liar.' Nodding, you turn your attention to the man and tell him, "If I win, we get the bunny. Deal?"

"Means you've gotta shoot the purple balloon."

Of course, the purple balloon is at the very top of the wall of balloons. Fantastic. You don't have too much hope that you'll actually be able to pop it, especially when you see the kinds of darts he hands over to you. First of all, the tips are so blunt and dull that you can 100% believe that Natsuki did hit the balloon with one, but it wasn't nearly sharp enough to even hurt someone if they tested it against their skin. Second, the weight of it felt wildly uneven in the palm of your hand. The shape of the dart just wasn't sufficient enough to propel it through the air like it should have. This was precisely why you never would waste your time or money on this...but you couldn't exactly back out now, not with Natsuki's intense magenta eyes watching you like a hawk. If you didn't at least make an attempt, you'd never hear the end of it at the Literature Club, and it might cause you to lose what little respect Natsuki had for you. Which never seemed like a lot to begin with.

"C'mon, we've got a line now," sighed the worker, unimpressed with your examination of his faulty darts. It wasn't his fault they sucked, anyway. You were so focused on aiming your first dart that you didn't see the angry glance Natsuki cast at the boy.

You pulled back your arm and flung the dart at the balloon. It was pretty pitiful, you couldn't deny that. It sailed off away from the wall of balloons and landed outside of the game stand on the grass somehow.

Natsuki huffed a sigh, her arms crossed. But when the worker snorted and tried to hide his laughter, the little pinkette sprang closer like an affronted pomeranian. "It's not her fault these darts are total crap!" She snapped. You would never have expected in a million years for Natsuki of all people to jump to your defense and try to protect your honor.

She catches your wide-eyed gaze and then looks off to the side irritably. "Keep- keep your eyes to yourself," she growled under her breath.

You fortunately have the sense not to tease her about it. You have a better feel for how the darts travel through the air now, so you pick up the second one and aim again before sending it sailing. This time, it manages to hit the purple balloon target, but it simply bounces off the surface of it and clatters to the ground.

Natsuki opens her mouth to potentially blow up on the man, but you press a finger to your lips in a silent plea to ask her to be quiet. Now you have to take the brunt of her righteous fury in only a single expression, but she doesn't say a word.

One chance left.

You pick up your final dart, judging the distance from here to the balloon and considering the best angle to throw it. After a bit, you finally shoot your shot- and the resounding pop! catches you and all the bystanders by surprise.

What remains of the purple balloon flutters uselessly in the breeze. The worker still cares nothing for this, just goes to pluck the stuffed rabbit toy down from the prize wall.

You turn to beam at Natsuki, pleased with yourself. You've managed to surprise her, you can tell, and when you're handed your prize, you offer it out to Natsuki with a bright smile. "That was fun, huh?"

She stares at the bunny rabbit, still trying to process what had just happened. Slowly, as if she believed it's soft, fake fur was poisoned or something, she reached out to take it into her arms. Her face is growing more and more red by the second, and she buries it into the plush doll as if to hide herself or maybe try to regain her composure. Probably both.

The worker clears his throat loudly, indicating the two of you are still holding up the line, so you and Natsuki swiftly step to the side and start walking through the park. You're a little concerned she might trip over something or into someone since she's still hiding her face in the rabbit's fur and can't see where she's going, so you stick close to her in case she needs a hand to steady her. So much for 'letting her fall next time.'

When you can't handle the awkward silence any longer, you say, "Er, Natsuki...? Are you-"

She straightens up, cuddling the rabbit close to her. "It's fine!" She squeaks. "I- I mean- that was-" She's truly struggling here, and it makes you feel guilty. "You did okay," she manages to at last get out.

A twinge of unexpected hurt flashes through you. You'd privately been hoping that she would be impressed and grateful, but you guessed you shouldn't have ever thought those words might even be in Natsuki's vocabulary. "Oh..." You didn't mean for it to come out so forlorn, but you couldn't help it. "Yeah, thanks." You turn away from her, fighting back your disappointment. "I guess I'll see you at the club after school Monday, then-"

As you take the first step away, however, you feel Natsuki's hand dart out to grab your arm and force you to stop. "Wait!" Her voice is high-pitched with some frantic emotion you can't place a name to. "W-Wait, Y/N- I only meant that-" She huffs, stomping her shoe on the ground in obvious exasperation that you could only hope wasn't directed at you. "I-" God, it's a train wreck not just for her, but for you to witness too. "Thank you-!" The words have to be practically dragged out of her, so she tries again. "...Thank you."

You wait in confusion to see if there's anything else she's going to add, but when she doesn't, you tentatively reply, "Uhm...no problem-? I mean, you're always bringing cupcakes and stuff to share with everyone, so I just was hoping maybe I could try to return the favor and get you something." You pause. "I mean, get you something that you wanted to give to your friend." Best to try and fix any potential mistakes that could get you yelled at again.

Those words had some kind of effect on Natsuki, that was for sure, but you had no idea if it was a good kind or a bad kind. She's gazing up at you silently, seemingly frozen in place. Something snaps her back to reality, for she at last releases your arm, hugging the rabbit again like it could support her. "I guess...you can be really sweet sometimes instead of just a pain in the ass," she mumbles. You're about ready to be offended until Natsuki slowly holds out her bunny towards you, refusing to look at you. You're extremely befuddled and not sure what to expect when the soft nose of the plush bunny rabbit is touched gently against your cheek in a gesture that's very much like a feather-light kiss. "S-Stupid."

You feel like you're too paralyzed to respond in any kind of way, and besides, Natsuki's already brushing past you and stalking off, not giving you a moment to react anyway. You stand there for what feels like a long time after she's gone until it feels like you might have just imagined what happened there at the end.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

Monika

Your day at the amusement park was drawing to a close, and suffice to say, you were thoroughly exhausted by everything that had happened. You stop to rest at one of the benches that was sort of away from the throngs of people who were starting to leave the park to head home, so at least the crowds were thinning out. Sayori had insisted you guys come here today, since it was Saturday and all, but she'd ditched you what feels like forever ago, and then you'd run into all the other members of the Literature Club- well, almost all of the other members, that is.

You let your mind drift as you sat there, leaning back into the wooden white bench and staring up at the sky. The yellow light was starting to fade as the sun slowly began it's descent into the horizon line. The amusement park would be closing in maybe an hour or so, you think to yourself as you let your eyes drift shut. You should really go and try to find Sayori so you can walk home together with her...not that the streets weren't safe in the evening, but it was entirely possible your friend could get lost or distracted and end up wandering around town for hours when she should be home. But you were honestly worn out from hours of walking around and socializing...

Right when you've finally gotten comfortable enough that you think you're dozing off out of reality and into a well-deserved, dreamy nap, there's a voice from right beside you that scares you enough to make you jump and snap your eyes wide open.

"Hi, Y/N! Fancy meeting you here."

Aaand, now you'd come across all of your Literature Club members- sitting on the bench beside you with her hands folded neatly in her lap was Monika. You've never seen her in anything besides her school uniform before, but the casual white and mint-green floral spring dress matched both her signature white bow and her eyes nicely at the same time. You hadn't even heard her walk up or sit down, which was kind of odd, but not odd enough for you to really think anything of it.

"Ah- hi, Monika," you greet with a small smile, trying to relax and not look as out-of-sorts as you felt. You run a hand through your hair, exhaling quietly in what was almost a sigh. "Yeah, I wasn't planning on leaving the house today, to be honest," you say in faint amusement. "Sayori sort of dragged me here to hang out."

Monika tilts her head to one side with a pleasant smile in return to you. "I see." She glances around as if she's expecting to see Sayori racing towards the two of you and calling loudly, her arms up in the air to get both of your attentions. But you and Monika are mostly alone. "So you spent the day with her?" The question is casual, and you don't think much of it at all.

"Uhm, not the whole day. We spent a little time together before she ran off somewhere...I bumped into Yuri and Natsuki today too, actually. Oh, but I was sort of thinking I should go try and find Sayori so we could head home."

Monika's emerald green gaze flicks away from you as a breeze ruffles her hair and yours. She doesn't respond for a moment, but you see that her friendly smile has faded somewhat now- and she looks...it's hard to say. Monika looks- gosh, you wish you were half as smart and descriptive as Yuri sometimes- wistful? Was that the word? Contemplatively wistful? She speaks again and it rouses you out of your daze. "So you were just about to leave." The Literature Club president flashes you an apologetic glance before rising gracefully up from the bench. "I didn't mean to bother; I can see you're tired, Y/N. I should get going too."

She doesn't seem sad, not necessarily, but you get the sense that something is a little off. Maybe it's the time of day affecting her mood? It's that weird hour where the day is technically over, but not quite yet- and there's a regretful longing permeating the atmosphere, the only way you could describe it might be like the feeling a high school kid gets on a Sunday evening, in spite of the fact today was Saturday, meaning the weekend wasn't over yet.

You move to stand up as well, a little clumsier than Monika. "But- there's still a little while before the park closes. If there was anything you still wanted to do here, I could come with you, if that sounds alright? Unless you were really going to leave, that is. I'm not so tired that I'd miss hanging out with you- outside of school, I mean."

There's the slightest hint of hesitation, and you're unable to decipher Monika's feelings right now. If you were to guess, you might say she's conflicted. Just as you're positive she's going to politely decline, her warm smile returns. "That would be nice," she says, and you realize you've been holding your breath.

"Okay, cool!" You brighten up and begin to walk through the amusement park with Monika.

She has her hands clasped behind her back and she's looking around to admire the scenery around you both while you do your best not to stare like a weirdo at her. "So, uhm...were you wanting to go on a ride or...?" You ask after a little while of silence.

Monika hums, but you don't think she's actually considering your suggestion. "I wouldn't ask you to wear yourself out anymore. When I first saw you on the bench, I thought you might have been taking a nap." While her tone of voice is casual, you can't shake the sense that there's an undercurrent of something else in those words. Almost like she's accusing others of making you tired or something. You're probably just imagining it.

Briefly, you wonder why she joined you if she thought you were asleep.

As if reading your thoughts, your club president continues, "Sorry if I disturbed you, Y/N." She slows the pace while you assure her that it was okay and she had done no such thing, stopping eventually to gaze upwards.

You follow suit to see the Ferris wheel towering above your heads. "I haven't been up there today," you comment thoughtfully. "Is it a pretty view?"

Monika dips her head slightly in assent. "I think so, yeah. Coming?" She leads you over to the man who is seating people in each of the carts, and he warns that this is the last go-around. "We understand, thank you," Monika says to him, and while she's just as charming, you think you know her well enough now to tell that this is her feigned politeness, like her guard is up.

He grunts and allows the two of you in one of the carts, shutting the glass door behind you.

You actually aren't scared at all. Well, you guess you are a little apprehensive at being in this small space alone with Monika, but you tell yourself you're being ridiculous. She's your friend, isn't she? So there's not a thing in the world to be nervous about...

The cart starts to go up into the air, and you stay standing while Monika takes a seat. Your hands press against the glass as the two of you climb higher and higher. The city is there, with all it's buildings and roads, but beyond it is... you can't really see what's beyond the city, and this confuses you. Shouldn't there be...something? Instead of just, blurry darkness? You blink several times and then brush at your eyes with the back of one hand like your sight is trying to deceive you. But when you look again, you still see only the murky black of nothingness beyond your city.

Monika's voice so near to you gives you a start- you'd been so dumbfounded by the missing scenery that you hadn't heard her stand up and come closer to you. Instead of watching the outside world, you sense her eyes are fixed intently on you. "What do you think?"

It's almost a relief to tear your gaze away from the glass. Her expression is rather closed off but serious, and sort of searching yours. You wish, not for the first time, that Monika was less of a mystery to you.

How to respond? "It's- strange," you manage to say.

The brunette leans impossibly closer to you, alight with surprise and near-disbelief as she presses, "What do you mean strange, Y/N?"

Feeling awkward and pressured, you find yourself taking a step backwards from Monika to get some space between you two. 'She'll think I'm crazy if I say it looks like we're floating in the middle of nowhere-outer-space in the middle of like a black hole or something.' "J-Just that-" You can see something akin to desperation written on her now, like she's trying to silently plead with you to answer her question sincerely. You fumble on the words, unused to this sort of intensity. "Just that...the town- it looks- different from up here..." Each word is stiff and awkward, you're really an awful liar, maybe even as bad as Natsuki.

Fervid disappointment seems to shake Monika's entire being, and she pulls back away from you, looking outside of the Ferris wheel cart again and far off into the distance. She's starting to become composed again and when the cart makes it last lap around and comes to a slow halt at the bottom, she turns back to face you and she's her usual self again: friendly, sweet, and bright. "I understand. Thank you, Y/N." The door to the cart opens and Monika moves to step out, offering you her hand to help you out.

Your breathing feels a little labored, and it isn't until later that you realize you'd actually been afraid. Not of Monika, more of the fact that you'd never once seen her behave anything like that before. It left such an impression on you that you were positive you hadn't imagined it. You do end up accepting her hand though, and you wonder if she can feel it's slight tremble.

One thing you weren't sure if you had imagined was the weird end of the world thing surrounding your city. Maybe there was something wrong with you. But you couldn't really think about that now.

"I told you it was a pretty view," giggled Monika. "You seem surprised. Didn't believe me?" She teased gently.

"Oh-! Oh, no, it isn't that! Like I said, it just was, er... different than I expected, is all," you murmur, glancing away- Monika's still holding your hand, but you don't have the heart to pull it out of her grasp.

You don't end up having to make that choice, since she jumps away from you at the yell of your friend Sayori. You see her bounding over to the two of you, just barely managing to hit the brakes and skid to a halt before colliding with you. She does however manage to shower you with dust and pebbles, to which you just press a hand to your forehead to quell a headache.

"Y/N! There you are! I was looking all over the place for you!" Sayori exclaims. She then waves at Monika, as bubbly as ever even though she should've, theoretically, gotten rid of some of that excess energy at the amusement park today. "Hey, Monika! Thanks for looking after her," she laughed.

Monika nods, much to your indignation. "My pleasure, Sayori. I'd better head off, then. I'll see you both after school for the club Monday!" She walked away, waving her farewell for a moment.

You didn't realize you were watching her go until Sayori's hand flailed in front of your face to get your attention. "Hey, we are going home together, aren't we?" She insists. "Otherwise I wasted soooo much time trying to hunt you down, Y/N!"

"Right, right, sorry. Of course we're walking back together- I was looking for you too."

Sayori pouts a little. "Did you think I'd be on the Ferris wheel?"

You grin. "Did you just use sarcasm, Sayori?"

She shakes her head quickly to deny it. "No, never! But am I wrong?"

"Okay, so maybe I did agree to spend some time with Monika," you confess with a shrug, allowing Sayori to pull you away towards the amusement park exit.

Sayori frowns, an unusual look for her. But it isn't a sad frown- it's a concentrated one. She was studying you with determination. "Did something happen? You seem a little out of it!" Amused, she pokes your cheek. "Fess up, Y/N! Do you have a crush on our club president? You have to tell me if you do! We're best friends!"

Sheesh, as if Sayori could ever keep a secret. But she was completely off base with that guess. "No," you answer her calmly. "I guess I...had some kind of epiphany."

".....what's an epiphany?"

'Ohmygod.'

[g0ldengubler]

Chapter 11 ~ Lurk

A/N: I feel like my smut is getting worse and worse aaaaaa but told u that things were going to get interesting (finally)! Also thank you so much for 3.1k reads on wattpad wtffffffff :') ....if i were to change nauseous all up and change this from a Y/N story to an OC...would it be good idea? aaaa but yes thank you for reading i love uuuuuu <3

Category: All three. Fluff, smut (NSFW18+ MDNI), angst

CW: masturbation, stalking

Summary: After getting a stomach bug, you aren’t able to go to work. But you do find other ways to cope the feeling of missing Spencer

Word Count: 1915

masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had been a couple of months since the copycat cases, and nothing has happened since. You told Hotch and the rest of the team your epiphany and went along with it. Since no new files connected to them had dropped on the round table, you climbed on the jet and focused on others while also low key keeping a high profile. Something still felt off to you about these cases, however. It got to a point where you were just comparing them to your own life since there were a few similarities, like the locations-Detroit and DC. You grew up in south-east Michigan and then moved to DC for work. But when you went to the, "I'm a woman, and the women are the main focus" thought you knew it was time to stop that. That feeling would never go away, nagging at you to keep trying-that you were almost there to the truth.

Today of all days, you woke up in the middle of the night close to missing the toilet as your guts flew out. You called Hotch in the morning telling him that it was just a bug, thinking it was only a 24 hour thing and then you can head back in tomorrow. He told you about a new case they were going to in Arizona, and that tomorrow you would help Garcia. Later that morning, you checked your phone to see that Spencer was calling. You smiled as you slid your finger along the arrow, putting your phone on speaker so you could feed your dogs (or at least try).

"Hi bubs," you greeted, "I'm letting you know now that I-"

"Are you feeling ok? Did you take anything? Does your head hurt? It's probably going to last a bit longer than a day...maybe three are you sure you aren't-"

"Spence, I'm fine," you said calmingly, "I thought about that too but we haven't had sex in awhile. I have my ginger ale and all the bread and butter I can use to make buttered toast. Plus I have my children with me and if I need anything Seth is right next door. I'll be in the bat cave tomorrow with Garcia helping along here. You have nothing to worry about."

Spencer let out a little sigh of relief, or at least you hoped it was. He told you he would call tonight and check in and then said your goodbyes as he had to get on the jet. You spent your day laying on the couch, binge watching Matloft on the Hallmark Murder and Mystery channel eating as much toast as you wanted, thankful that you had some of your favorite ginger ale to make you feel better.

Feeling a bit better as the sun hid behind the buildings outside your apartment balcony, you decided to nibble on some chocolate. Monk now on the tv, the delicious candy handled well in your stomach. Your phone rang and you put it on speaker.

"How's my favorite doctor doing?" you answered.

"Doing alright," said Spencer, "but how's my favorite girl doing, hm? How's your stomach?"

"I'm feeling a bit better! I've been eating chocolate and it hasn't come up at all. Kind of missing home, too. A bowl of chicken lemon rice soup sounds amazing right now."

"Well maybe one of these days we can go back to your dad's cabin and grab some on the way! That actually does sound really interesting, you have my mouth watering already."

You both giggled at his little joke. It was something you felt that you needed and you were really missing him. "I wish you were here." you then said.

"I wish I was, too. I miss you, this case isn't solving the same without you here."

"Good thing I'll be with Garcia tomorrow morning...or maybe that's a bad thing now that I think about it."

"Oh I can't wait!" Spencer chuckled.

"Say," he asks, "going back to what you said earlier, have we really not have sex in awhile?"

"It's sadly true," you sigh, slowly getting up from the couch and heading to your room, "work has really been kicking us in the ass. Guess that's what happens when you take a month vacation, or taking one the day after you get back from your first case on the field."

A thought popped into your head. "Maybe we could change that..."

Spencer's voice went from playful to confused quickly, almost sounding nervous "I mean, of course we can when I come back, but-"

"We don't have to wait till you come back! What if...we tried over the phone?" You slowly started rubbing over your tits, softly squeezing them here and there.

"I-I mean..." Spencer went silent for a moment. "...are you sure?"

"We don't have to if you feel like you'd get caught. I don't want you to get in trouble from Hotch." You slowly moved your hand down your body. "But that just means you have to wait until you come back...and that would just be hell, wouldn't it?" You slid your hand down to your core and felt the wetness that pooled. "How distracting it would be if you were at the station, trying to put together a geographical profile or presenting the profile, and have me pop in your head from time to time, leaving you distracted from your work because you're thinking about all the things you want to do to me."

He went silent again. You knew you got him, and he knew it too. Picturing him in his hotel room, nerves building up inside him mixed with excitement. You heard movement over the speaker, the ruffle of the bed sheets, his breath hitting his phone. "Ok one last thing before we do this...do you feel alright enough to do this? Because once you say yes, there's no going back."

"Spencer, I'm ok. I want this." You reassured him.

He exhaled a little, as if all his worries about you fell off his shoulders. "Now c'mon, do you want your angel...daddy."  

Got him.

"You have no idea how much I want you," Spencer's voice was lower, both in tone and in volume. He went silent for another moment, "...how do you do this?"

You giggled at his innocence. "Just tell me how it feels...what you're thinking about. There's nothing to worry about, Spence. It's me. Just be yourself."

You took his lack of a response as a yes before pouring out his thoughts. "I miss you so much angel," he began, "I'm not going to lie, I was thinking about you earlier."

"Oh really? What was I doing?" You started rubbing circles on your clit, biting your lip so you didn't make a noise too early.

"I was sitting in the conference room of the station earlier today, writing up the profile. I was almost finished when I started thinking about how at about that time, you'd come in with coffee in your hands for the team. It helped me missing you, but then I started thinking about you in a red tank top because..well, it's Arizona," He chuckled under his breath, but it sounded more like he was hiding a groan, "Anyways, I thought about you in a red tank top, talking to me as I'm finishing up. Then, I gently push you down to the floor and l-let you do as you please..."

He stuttered as he told his story. He wasn't talking with his mouth anymore, his lust was taking over. The way he went from his normal self to slowly easing into a more darker, deeper tone, made you realize how fast you picked up the pace. "Who knew you could have such a dirty mind at work, Doctor." you said as you slowed yourself down a bit.

"You wanna know the best part? As soon as I felt myself getting hard, Hotch came in asking if the profile was finished. And...immediately, as soon as he left the room, I thought about you hiding under the table...mmm...continuing your work."

A soft moan escaped your lips before you even had the chance to stop yourself. His whimper caught you off guard. You never thought he would be so adventurous with his lust, but the fact he was willing and open to new things made you smile-you liked that in a person. You picked up your pace again, feeling like you weren't in control anymore.

"Fuck I miss your pretty noises, angel...Do that again."

He didn't even have to ask. You were imagining that your fingers were his, working on your clit while he fucked you so hard. You thought of his head in the crook of your neck leaving marks to make sure people knew you were his. You thought of his breath on your neck, and the groans and little moans and whimpers in your ear. You let out a string of moans as you heard him softly groan and whimper. "It feels s-s-so goo-d daddy!"

"Yeah? Are you close?"

"S-s-shit yes yes yes please let me cum daddy...fuck please!"

"Cum for me, angel. Let me hear you."

You waisted no time at all. The knot in your stomach tightened and broke as a silent moan left your mouth. You ended up a whimpering mess, mumbling his name and curses under your breath. "Fuck angel just like that...I-I'm gonna...cum oooh!" He came shortly after you, groans and curses leaving his lips. You thought you were going to cum again, but you were always turned on by his noises just as much as he was with yours.

After you both rode out your highs and calmed down, Spencer spoke. "That was incredible, Y/N!"

"I'm glad you liked doing that, bubs." You said through a smile.

"Liked? I loved that! We have to try that again one day."

"I think that's a great idea!"

"I miss you so much. But I'll see you tomorrow over the video call with Garcia."

"The video call?"

"Oh shut it!"

You both giggled at your little banter before saying your I-love-you's and goodnight's and hung up. You got cozy in your bed and as you were about to drift to sleep, a loud banging on your front door startled you. You stayed in your bed holding a pillow for a few before getting up, you're dogs barking like crazy. You grabbed your gun from your bedside table and slowly walked to the door. You looked through the peephole but no one was there. You tucked your gun in your pants before opening slowly. Looking to your right, and then to your left in the hall, no one was there. A crinkle sound came from under your foot as you tried to slowly step out. Looking down, you picked up the piece of paper and went back in. Back against the door, you looked at the paper. You felt your face go from frightened to panic as you read. 'No...this can't be happening...'

In magazine cut outs, the letter read:

"Did you connect the dots, you nerd? Did you find out that it's me?"

[honey-dewey]

We all Cope Somehow

Javier Peña x Reader

Word Count: 2,017

Warnings: Javier gets sad, Steve gets drunk, Javier is creepy for all of two seconds, Javier has a breakdown, talking about scars and injuries. 

Permanent Taglist: @phoenixhalliwell

The fight is hard, and at the end of the day, everyone has their coping mechanism. Steve drinks until he can’t remember why he opened a bottle. Javier gets lost with some corner girl who won’t remember his name or face. You cook and nurture your boys because no one else will. That’s just how life is, until Javier comes home late, unable to find his forgetfulness.

“Javi?” 

“What?” 

You shuffled slightly, the ache in your back ever persistent. “I made dinner. Are you staying?” 

Javier nodded, putting out his cigarette and coming in from the balcony, seeing Steve with his third drink at the table already. “What’s for dinner?” 

“Figured we could use a taste of home,” you said, putting a plate with a steak on it in front of Javier. “Texas, right?” 

Another nod from Javier, who wordlessly began to eat. Steve gulped down his drink and shakily picked up his knife. You immediately stepped in, taking the steak knife and cutting Steve’s food for him. 

“Thank you,” he slurred, and you smiled.

“Any time.” 

After dinner, you cut Steve off, giving him some water and bread and sitting him down on your couch. Javier scooped his jacket up and made to leave, turning back to look at you one last time before silently slipping out. 

You noticed Javier leaving, not bothering to say anything. Turning to face him walking out your door would be painful, seeing him and knowing he was going to bury himself in some stranger on the street, not looking for comfort but escape. Knowing those kind eyes would go dark with a feral, primal lust that couldn’t be stopped. You tucked a blanket around Steve, left him two painkillers, and went to go sleep yourself. 

Harsh knocking at your door hours later woke you. Steve groaned, and you immediately tugged a robe around yourself and ran to the door. 

“Go back to sleep Stevie,” you said softly, peering through the door’s peephole and seeing the back of Javier’s head. “It’s just Javi.” 

Steve fell back into the couch, disappearing into sleep once more. You tugged the door open quietly, shushing Javier as he went to talk. “Shh. Steve’s asleep.” 

Javier nodded, gesturing to your bedroom. You silently agreed, bare feet making almost no noise as you two headed towards the room. 

“What are you doing back here?” You asked, shutting your bedroom door and turning to Javier. “You never come back after you leave for the night and, Javi!” 

You shouted his name, shoving his hands off your body. In the dim bedroom lights, you could see his pupils blown wide with that lust he reserved for women who could handle it. But now, with no outlet and no other options, Javier was turning to the next available thing.

“C’mon,” he crooned softly, reaching out for you again. “You know you want me.” 

“Not like this!” You shouted, jumping away from his wandering hands. “Javi! Christ, get away from me! Javier!” 

That seemed to break Javier, his body crumpling as you shied away. You knew that no matter what state he was in, he would never hurt you. But this still wasn’t comforting. 

“Javi?” You asked softly, seeing him still. “Javi, honey, you okay? Are you in there?” 

Javier shook his head. Tiny, minuscule movements that made you scared. 

“Hey,” you said, reaching out but not touching. “Let’s go for a drive.” 

He followed you out, numbly climbing into the car and waiting for you to start it. Taking a midnight drive probably wasn’t advised, but it calmed Javier down and to see him smile again, you’d personally fight Escobar, no matter the odds. 

Taking a turn out of the neighborhood and finding your favorite winding road, you drove in relative silence, Javier gazing out the window as the lights grew smaller and smaller until they looked like bright stars in the sky, making messy bunches of constellations. The hum of the car and the rock of the road beneath you calmed him, easing his troubled mind until he finally began to cry. 

“Oh Javi, honey, it’s okay,” you mumbled, stopping the car in an abandoned parking lot and leaning over the console to hug Javier. “Hey, it’s okay honey. You weren’t right, and that’s just fine. It’s okay to not be okay, you hear me?” 

Javier nodded, burying himself in your arms and mumbling out soft, broken, apologies. 

You hummed, smoothing a hand over his heaving back. “Javi, I forgive you. I will always forgive you.” 

Another agonizing ten minutes passed, during which you held Javier as he shook and cried and let everything out. You simply rubbed his back and held him close, promising you would always be there. 

Finally, finally, Javier pulled away, still trembling. You held his hands, smoothing your thumbs over the scarred skin on the backs of his hands. “You never told me about this,” you realized, peering deeper at the pebbled scar that spanned the entire back of Javier’s left hand. 

Javier pulled in a breath. You couldn’t tell if he knew you were trying to distract him, but you needed to get his mind off his current pain. “My brother,” he said slowly, a horrible rasp to his voice. “we had a treadmill, and my hand got caught in it. My brother was running on top of it. It wasn’t his fault.” 

You smiled, examining his face. Pushing sweaty hair off his forehead, you traced another scar, barely an inch long, in the dead center of Javier’s forehead. “This one?” 

“I was six,” Javier remembered. “My sister threw a ball under a table, and I ran too fast to duck in time. Hit the stupid thing head on. Thirteen stitches.” 

Another kind smile, and this time you moved forward to press a warm kiss to the scar. “And that one on your elbow you refuse to tell Steve about?” 

That was able to draw a laugh out of Javier, even if it was skittering and faint. “My other sister, the oldest, let me have her old roller skates when she outgrew them.” As he talked, Javier’s words got steadier and steadier, the shake to his hands slowly fading. “We lived on a street with a cul-de-sac at the end, and there was a hill leading up to the circle. My sister showed me how to turn at the cul-de-sac, in a big loop. I started at the top of the hill to gain speed. But I fucked it up. I was going too fast and couldn’t control myself, so I ended up tripping, and skidded three feet. It’s a miracle I didn’t break something. My elbow was somehow the only casualty.” 

You giggled, rolling his sleeves up and lifting his right arm so you could kiss the quarter sized scar. “A daring injury,” you promised. “That one on your ankle I teased you about?” 

Javier shook his head, a small smile pulling at his lips. “A glass cup my sisters used to shave shattered in the shower. Cut me in two places. Why are you asking about the boring ones?” 

Shrugging, you traced a longer, more wicked scar on Javier’s left arm. “Because they’re fun scars. War stories are interesting, but they’re not you.” As you explained, you felt a knot in your chest grow, drawing the breath from your lungs. “Those little scars, they tell me who you are. You’re a dork, a family man, a brother, a lover, a truster. When I ask about the bad scars, all I see is a soldier.” 

Javier grabbed your arms, steadying you. “Tell me about this,” he said, poking a scar on your cheek that was often mistaken for a dimple. 

You nodded. “I was a toddler. Ran into a bannister in the hallway, and the sharp edge got my cheek. I needed two stitches.” 

Tracing down your arms, Javier turned your wrists over and thumbed over the identical lines that were burned into the crease of each wrist. “These?” 

“A common contact point for the blazingly hot pots and pans I cook with.” You shivered as Javier kissed each one. “I dunno if there’s much feeling in that bit of my skin.” 

Javier’s eyebrows knit, the worry plain in his face. “And you cook anyway?” 

“It’s my escape,” you said softly. “When I cook, I can imagine we’re not getting death threats, that we’re just a few close friends on a trip together and we didn’t want to go out for dinner. I can imagine I’m back home, cooking for my family or that we’re celebrating your birthday when I make a cake instead of us getting a huge lead. You find women who help you forget, I cook and bake to escape.” 

“Oh.” Javier smoothed a thumb over another small scar, half an inch long, on the delicate flesh between your finger and thumb. “Knife?” 

You nodded. “I got myself pretty good there when I was cutting veggies a few years back. No stitches, but I bled like crazy. My roommate thought I was super hurt.” 

Gently resting your captive hands on the wheel of the car, Javier ticked the radio up, letting soft music fill the space. “Thank you,” he said. “For driving me out here. For not hating me.” 

You shook your head. “I could never hate you Javi. You were just lost. I helped find you again.” 

That grin you’d worked so hard for finally returned, the one that he’d give you over dinner when you made something impressive and when he had to help you with your bulletproof vest. “Should we go home? Steve’s gonna wake up soon.” 

You nodded. “Sure. Poor thing’s gonna be so hungover today.” 

Sure enough, when you two got home, Steve was sitting up on the couch. The sun hadn’t risen yet, but you were DEA agents. You woke up before the day even started. 

“Where were you?” Steve said, standing and stumbling to the door. “I was so worried!” 

“We went for a drive,” you reassured, grabbing Steve’s arms to steady him. “Javi, darling, will you grab a pack of bacon from the fridge? I’m gonna make breakfast.” 

Javier grabbed the bacon while you steered Steve back to the couch. 

“You called me darling,” Javier noticed once you’d entered the kitchen, tossing on an apron and turning a small portable radio on. “Intentional?” 

You grabbed his shirt collar and kissed him. “Yeah. Intentional,” you said as you broke away, opening the bacon. “Start the coffee?” 

Javier swore softly, grabbing the coffee and three mugs. “I guess I should stop finding those corner girls to help me forget, huh?”

Taking out a pan, you shrugged. “I could always teach you to cook,” you said. “Or you could take up photography like Steve. Or, better yet, sewing. I know you can already do it.” 

“I cannot sew.” 

“Yes you can,” you countered, reaching around Javier to grab the eggs. “I watched you fix a shirt once.” 

Javier swore again. “I think I’ll try cooking,” he decided, standing behind you and loosely wrapping his arms around your middle. “Scrambled?” 

Nodding, you cracked six eggs into the pan. “Start making the toast please,” you said, and Javier did so, touching you every time he passed. Just soft touches, a comforting hand brushing your back or shoulder when he walked behind you. 

Over breakfast, you read the paper as best you could, occasionally asking Javier to translate. Steve had his head in his hand, the other hand holding his coffee cup. He listened halfheartedly, not making a sound as he took in the information. 

“Alright,” you said, folding the paper and standing, taking everyone’s empty plate. “Get ready for work. Today’s gonna be busy.” 

Steve left, heading upstairs to grab clothes. Javier went across the hall, finishing first and coming back, finding you already ready, adjusting your lipstick in the mirror. “Waiting on Steve?” 

“Waiting on Steve,” you confirmed, turning to Javier. “Well don’t you look good.” 

Javier smiled. He was wearing the red shirt you openly adored, the top few buttons popped open. 

“Lovebirds,” Steve said from your doorway, adjusting his own shirt. “C’mon, we’re gonna be late.” 

You laughed. “We could never. Not with how you drive.” 

Javier nodded his agreement and followed you out to the car. Steve looked back at the two of you, arm in arm. “So, what’s this?” 

“This, Steve,” you said, turning a finger and gesturing for him to look where he was going. “Is love.”

[pinky-the-elephant-room]

Shoot your shot

♡ AN: I got around to writing for Haikyuu! again and this time it’s for Oikawa, can you believe I hated this man so much that I ranted to my friend about him for a hour? Now I’m writing a smut for him the growth we love to see it~ I’m an anime only person and I know some spoilers so ignore any inconsistencies you might see because this is an anime only canon fic. 

♡ Oikawa x Brazilian Fem Reader : Playing beach volleyball is a cinch no problem right? But the sight of you in a bikini is too much to bear and having a hard on while playing volleyball is hardly convenient. So when Oikawa sees you in nothing but a towel in the locker room he decides to finally make his move on you. 

♡ Warning: Explicit shower smut with 27 year old Oikawa, voyeurism, semi public sex, and maybe a daddy kink at the end? Read at your own discretion. 

✯ ✯ -------------------------  ✯ ✯ 

➢ Portuguese translation

⇢ Y/N, você está aqui? - Y/N, are you in here?  

⇢ Sim, ainda estou aqui - Yes, I’m still here.

⇢ Fode me o meu amor - Fuck me, my love. 

“Yoohoo! Lucas, how you been?” Oikawa said, stretching out his o’s.

His Argentinean teammate said something, but the reception was terrible.

“Hold on! Let me take this outside.” He stepped out of his air-conditioned flat out into the humid air.

The voice garbled a few more sentences before it became clearer. “C-can you hear me now?”

Oikawa grinned hearing the familiar voice. “Yeah! What’s up?”

Though, he will always cherish his memories with his former team in Japan. Oikawa was now connecting with his national team as well as creating bonds and chemistry on par with his friends back home.

“Alright, amigo, I just did you a huge favor. You’re going to love me and I’m demanding more of that milk bread from you.”

He felt the familiar irritation every time someone claimed his milk bread. Oikawa only shared his milk bread with his teammate because he never tasted the magnificence of the treat. He almost suffered a heart attack when Lucas asked what was so good about bread.

“No promises, but I’m listening,” Oikawa replied as he looked over the night sky of Bueno Aires, it felt gratifying to know that a Japanese boy from a small town now lived in one of the biggest cities in Argentina.

“You remember telling me to help out with your little crush on Y/N, right?”

He rolled his eyes and pouted, “I don’t recall asking for your help! I just asked if she was single. That’s two different things!”

Oikawa remembered when he first saw Y/N at the 2021 Tokyo Olympics, he had been ecstatic to go home despite representing another country. It was his debut performance on a world stage. So, he walked around Tokyo for a while before heading back to his hotel to prepare for his match. When Oikawa turned on his T.V., he noticed it was the Women’s volleyball finals between Brazil and the U.S. It seemed like the Japanese women didn’t make it. He watched for a few minutes absentmindedly before he got distracted by player 24 from Brazil. She was the ace and was quite short, but it seemed like the average height for the female players. She was quite good, stealing point after point from their opponents. But that wasn’t what caught his attention. But rather her amusing victory dance each time she gained a point for her team. Y/N would obnoxiously dance in front of the net making her opponents furious.

Oikawa grinned childishly; he knew she was doing it on purpose as the U.S. team started making amateur errors as the gap between the two teams widened. It was a good strategy, one that he himself used on opponents that irritated him like his former kouhai, Kageyama. But his involved taunting, not twerking in front of his opponents. He didn’t think he would look half as good as she did.

From there, it was mere curiosity as to who the player was. She was quite pretty with her long curly hair and golden skin. He didn’t think he would meet her the very next day as she chatted with Lucas in Portuguese. He had no idea his Spanish speaking teammate even knew Portuguese. She had glanced over to him and introduced herself in rich accented English.

“Hello, I’m Y/N L/N. Nice to meet you.” She held out her hand.

He shook it, marveling at the softness despite the calluses he felt on her palm.

When she left to go find her team, Oikawa turned to Lucas and asked in a casual voice, “soooo… are you two together or something?”

Lucas just grinned at him and shook his head.

“Nah, she’s my how you say… my tomodachi.”

From there Lucas had taken it upon himself to get the two together, which didn’t work well after the Olympics were over as he returned to Bueno Aires and she to Brazil.  

“So, anyway I told her that you would do it in place of me! Isn’t that great?” Oikawa snapped out of his thoughts as Lucas continued.

“Wait what? Repeat that last part.”

He heard an aggravated sigh from the phone.

“Y/N participates in a beach volleyball competition every summer for charity. Her usual partner is gone, and she asked me, but I told her that I hurt my ankle. So, I volunteered you for the job!”

Oikawa blinked as the words registered in his mind.

“B-but I’ve never played professional beach volleyball before.”

Sure, he’s played some matches for fun every now and then. But surely a legitimate competition is different than screwing around with a beach ball.

“Ehh, it’s the same sport just with different rules. But don’t let that get in your way. This is your chance!”

Since he came back from Tokyo, Oikawa did sort of miss her and he hadn’t connected with any of the girls he met since.

“Alright fine. Let’s do this. How hard can it be?”

From there Lucas gave Y/N’s number to him. He immediately texted her and they figured out a schedule to practice together a few months before the actual tournament. Thankfully with the Olympics over, he no longer had to be in Argentina for the rigorous team practices and was free to go to Brazil as he pleased. So, a few weeks later he reached the coastal city Ubatuba in Brazil, ready to finally take a crack at beach volleyball.

Oikawa was munching away on his toast when he heard a knock in his hotel room. He quickly downed his breakfast smoothie and made his way to look through the peephole to see Y/N standing outside waiting patiently. He unlocked the door and let her in.

“Hey. How was your flight?” She asked as she kissed his cheek in greeting.

Oikawa felt his face get warm and tried not to get too excited over the fact that she had kissed him. He knew it was part of the friendly culture, but he couldn’t help the flutters that erupted from the gesture.

“Not too bad. Only two hours long.”

“Hope you’re ready to practice today. My friends and I have a court set up at Praia de Santa Rita. It’s a private beach we reserved and afterwards there are tons of restaurants we can go to for dinner,” Y/N said as she looked around the fancy hotel he had booked. He smirked at her reaction of course he deserved nothing but the best.

The two of them stepped out of the hotel and his eyes widened at the sight of her large jeep. Y/N jumped in and waved him inside. He carefully maneuvered himself in, hopefully, she wouldn’t drive too crazily.

“Put on your seat belt, you’ll need it!” Y/N screamed gleefully, and she revved up her jeep before pulling out of the parking lot. Oikawa’s nails dug into the seat’s handles while he held on tightly as she swerved around the tight corners without slowing down. His face continued to pale as she kept driving before finally pulling next to a beach. He carefully let himself out and his legs felt like jelly.

Oikawa gasped out, “y/n, please don’t ever drive again for everyone’s safety.”

He only heard the remnants of her door slamming and her giggles while she walked away. Oikawa followed her coming onto a rest area.

“Ok, this is where the restrooms and locker rooms are. So, get changed if you need to and then just follow the signs down to the beach,” she told him before heading inside herself with a small bag in her hand. He himself had brought along a change of clothes some shorts and a tank top with some sunscreen. Oikawa learned the hard way how important sunscreen was under the intense sun here when he turned into a lobster. After getting changed he found himself on the warm sand with the hot sun beating on his head. There was a volleyball net set up in the middle of the sand and there was a small group there getting warmed up as they spiked the ball from one side to the other.

“Hey! Good you’re here now we can get started,” a voice called from behind him. He turned around to see Y/N dressed in a small violet bikini which left little to the imagination. Her toned body and caramel skin caused his own body to burn with undisguised want.

“Are you playing in that?” He yelped.

Y/N looked down at her bikini confused, not seeing anything wrong with it.

“Yeah? What else would I wear? I mean sand gets everywhere. I can’t exactly wear a volleyball uniform on the beach,” she said with teasingly.

The flush on his cheek became brighter and he couldn’t exactly blame this on the hot sun either.

“So, what do you know about professional beach volleyball, Toru?”

His face immediately blossomed with a smile. He still wasn’t used to people openly calling him by his first name without honorifics despite being out of Japan for a few years now. But with Y/N it sounded natural and perfect coming out of her mouth. Though she didn’t exactly pronounce his name correctly, she rolled the rs too much. Oikawa never tried to correct her because he found her pronunciation absolutely sensual.

“Aren’t the rules mostly the same?”

Y/N shook her head. “Not exactly. A beach volleyball court is smaller and instead of six players, there are only two. Meaning only me and you are going to protect the entire court. There are no setters, liberos, or blockers. The two players usually divide it into two sides, protecting the left and the right. Beach volleyball games are usually faster, and it's usually played to 21 points instead of 25.”

Oikawa now understood why Lucas had readily volunteered him to become her partner. It would require time and dedication to become decent at the game which he was all too ready to bestow on her.

“Is that all?” he asked looking down at her.

Suddenly, he heard loud yells as the ball headed towards their area and he instinctively grabbed it before it hit either of them. But as soon as he touched it, the ball felt weird. It was lighter and bigger than the average volleyball.

“Oh, and the volleyball is different as you can see.”

Y/N patted his back and said, “come on. Let’s start.”

There were two other girls on one side of the court while he and Y/N occupied the other. She passed off the ball to him for his serve. Y/N went to stand in the top left while he served from the right baseline. He was just about to toss up the ball when he noticed something incredible.

Oikawa bit his lip to contain his groan, the sight was pure torture. It wasn’t fair to him and really any man. Y/N was standing in front of him with her knees bent, ready to receive any serve coming her way. There wasn’t anything wrong with her stance, in fact, if she was wearing her volleyball uniform, she would be doing her job like any other volleyball player professional or otherwise. However, in her bikini the forbidden scene made him feel like the worst type of peeping tom. But he couldn’t help it as he messed with the ball in his hand. Her position was perfect for him to saddle up behind her and press his cock against her clothed cunt. Her round ass cheeks were entirely exposed as the bikini bottoms were stretched against her body and the vaginal lips were apparent even against the dark purple fabric.

Which genius made it a thing to play volleyball in bikinis? Whoever it was Oikawa wanted to strangle and thank them from the bottom of his heart all at the same time.

He jerked his face away from Y/N’s body and tossed the ball in the air only to completely miss. The ball just tumbled a few feet from his person. Y/N turned around to give him a concerned look and gave him a thumbs up.

“It’s ok!” she yelled out before focusing back on her opponents.  “Keep going!”

‘Don’t look. Don’t look. D-O-N-T! LOOK! Ah fuck it,’ he thought as his eyes went right back to her ass. Honestly, he thought about possible sex with Y/N multiple times, but they were always fantasies with her on the bottom or on top riding him. But never from behind, clearly, he didn’t know what he was missing. His breath hitched when she bent down just a little further before righting herself again. He could probably call for an impromptu break and take her to the side for a private conversation. Maybe finally have that kiss they’ve both been craving for a long time before pushing her against a wall or a tree. He could hike her legs around him and fuck her until her voice was hoarse from screaming his name while her cunt creamed on his cock.

“Come on, Toru! Let’s go!” Y/N yelled as she effectively ruined his daydreams.

Ok, he had to focus now. Absolutely. The ball was once again in the air and he hit it with his palm only for it to hit the net. ….

Was it possible to bury only the face in the sand? He might have a need for that in just a few minutes.

Just as he was about to serve again his eyes wandered right back to Y/N’s backside, but this time she turned around at the same time to meet his eyes. His eyes widened and he quickly faced the front once more.

“Time out!” he heard Y/N say.

Y/N quickly walked towards Oikawa and stared him down.

“Have you been staring at my ass this entire time?”

He swallowed and coolly responded with a “no.”

“I’m not stupid, Toru! Is this going to be a problem for you?” she asked with her arms crossed and stern.

There was no point in lying, she already caught him red-handed so instead, he shrugged.

“It’s not my fault the view’s just too good. I’m only a man,” he said with a low voice.

“Y-you!” She seemed flabbergasted and amused at the same time. Y/N let out a snort and chuckled a few times before snatching the ball from his hands.

“Just go block for now. I’ll serve.” Y/N pointed to the same spot she herself was standing at. Oikawa being entirely shameless just ran his fingers through his hair and winked at Y/N before taking his spot at the front. The two women that were their opponents seemed to be hysterically giggling as well, guess he wasn’t as subtle as he thought he was. So, Oikawa just waved at them good-naturedly and readied himself for a rally.

It looked like Y/N wasn’t as distracted as him because she served without any problems and the game continued. It was much more difficult than he initially thought. While indoor volleyball was a team effort and everyone had to do their part, now Oikawa was responsible for everything. He was running around diving for the ball like a libero and even doing his own spikes as Y/N set a toss perfectly for him. Before he knew it, the game cycled through 6 sets faster than he was used to. That was another thing he noticed beach volleyball’s sets were much faster paced. Usually, he would take his time to dissect and figure out the opponent’s weaknesses before setting up tosses for his team. Now he had no time for that as he dived and ran after the lighter ball. Not only that he had to consider the weather, but the winds were also messing up his shots. Each time he aimed for the tight corners they would get blown out of bounds. Beach volleyball wasn’t harder necessarily, but it was definitely a challenge to learn.

After a couple more sets, Y/N called for a break. She handed him a cold-water bottle from the cooler while she drank some Gatorade.

“So, how long have you been playing beach volleyball?” he asked after swallowing the refreshing water.

“As long as I’ve been playing volleyball. It’s part of the Brazilian team’s routine. Playing beach volleyball actually makes you a better, well-rounded player,” she said as she put the tightened the Gatorade’s lid on and put it back in the cooler.

Y/N stepped closer to him and leaned into his face.

“Don’t think I’ve forgotten about you staring at my ass. I can’t have you missing your serves during the tournament,” She snickered, he felt her hot breath against his ears, causing shivers to erupt across his body.

Oikawa just leaned in even closer, deliberately eyeing her lips for a moment before staring back in her eyes.

“And what exactly do you plan on doing if I don’t stop?”

Instead of getting flustered and putting space in-between them, she instead stepped even closer to him and blinked innocently at him, her eyes dilating and enrapturing him.

“Behave and if you’re a good boy. I’ll reward you, promise,” she muttered just low enough for him to barely hear.

Y/N pecked his cheek and she lingered there for a moment, he could bask in her closeness and smell the remnants of the shampoo from her long hair.

“Y/N! Come on let’s play again,” her friend shouted from halfway across the court.

“Looks like time’s up. I’ll let you serve this time,” Y/N giggled and ran back to start the game again.

Oikawa felt embarrassment choking him on the inside and vowed not to mess up too badly again. He made his way back to the court and grabbed the ball, he deliberately didn’t look at Y/N as she once stood at the front to block. This time he hit one of his more powerful serves and found that most of the power didn’t transfer over to the ball, but he was able to slightly control the ball better this time. The rally continued on until the sun had turned orange and was about to set. Eventually, the group decided on another date they could meet up and practice again for the tournament.

When everything was packed up and put away, he and Y/N made their trek back up the beach to the resting area again.

“Hey, since we won’t be able to practice until next Saturday again. What say me and you practice by ourselves?”

Y/N looked up from her phone and nodded affirmatively.

“Sounds like a good idea. Practice matches once a week probably won’t help unless we get some practice of our own.”

Oikawa bit his lip, hesitating for a minute before asking her.

“Also, since I’m here, you mind showing me around? This is the first time I’ve been to Brazil.”

Y/N again nodded but with more enthusiasm this time as she regaled about tales of the amazing tourist spots and restaurants they could explore in their free time. The two of them went inside the rest area and he went into the men’s locker room to take a quick shower before changing into his clothes.  Just as he stripped down and stepped into the shower, he heard a crash and scream coming from the hallway. He turned off the water and tugged a fluffy towel around his waist before walking to track down whatever made the sound. When he walked out to an empty building, he heard Y/N’s voice distinctly cursing coming from the women’s locker room.

“Y/N? You alright?” Oikawa called out, he waited for a few minutes to hear her reply and when she didn’t respond he stepped inside. He peeked inside carefully just in case there were women walking around. He heard some clutter falling onto the floor a few feet away so following the noise he found Y/N in a towel trying to pick up her items.

“You ok?” he asked concerned. Y/N startled and lost her balance, tumbling onto the locker room’s floor.

“Toru, what are you doing in here? This is a woman’s locker room.”

“I know I thought I heard a woman screaming and then I heard your voice, so I came to check if you were ok.”

She sighed and pushed her dripping wet hair from her face. “Yeah, I’m ok I slipped in the shower, and then I realized I brought my phone into the shower, so I came to put it away, only to drop everything inside of my bag.”

Oikawa was about to bend down and help. “Here let me help.”

Y/N held up her hand and replied, “it’s ok I got it.” She gathered all her items and put it all away along with her phone.

Just as she was about to get up, the water that had been dripping from her body and hair gathered on the floor and made the tiles slick. Her foot slipped and she was about to hit the ground hard when Oikawa grabbed her in time before she could. However, Y/N lost her hold on the towel around her body and it exposed her chest and curves to his naked eyes. He quickly turned his head away while keeping a secure grip on her.

“Ahh! Don’t look!” she screamed and slapped her hands over her breasts. “Did you see anything?”

Oikawa swallowed and wished he could tell her no, but he sort of caught a glimpse at the body he had been craving to touch and feast his eyes on since he met her. So, he should opt to keep quiet.

“It’s ok, it’s nothing I haven’t seen before!” Except he panicked and opened his mouth.

“What does that even mean you jerk!” He could feel her try to pull away from his arms.

“Wait that came out wrong, I swear!”

Oikawa turned back around and felt blindsided by Y/N’s beauty. She was soaked to the bone, but never did she look more beautiful to him than in that moment.

“You’re so….” He trailed off. She looked at him a little confused and quit trying to pull away.

“So what?”

He leaned in and caressed her cheek. Oikawa didn’t finish his sentence and instead just connected their two lips. As he sensually captured her lips, Y/N eagerly responded back to him as if she had been desperately waiting for this just like he was. Keeping one hand on her chin to angle her face, his other hand traveled down to her naked bosom. He reverently caressed and tweaked her dusky peaks while expertly maneuvering the kiss. Y/N whimpered with want when his tongue brushed up against hers. He smirked at her reactions as her breathing started getting more erratic and her cute noises became louder and louder. They only broke apart when he heard people approaching the locker rooms.

Just as Oikawa was about to move away from Y/N, she grabbed his hand.

“The far-left shower at the end,” she jerked her head towards it.

He smiled with excitement knowing that she wanted to continue as much as he did. Grabbing and picking her up like she weighed nothing, he hurried to the shower and tugged the shower curtain shut.

Just in time too as he could hear women laughing and talking in Portuguese.

“Y/N, você está aqui?” a woman called out.

Y/N for her part looked startled at being addressed and pushed away Oikawa’s hands that were still playing with her chest.

“Sim, ainda estou aqui,” Y/N responded in a clear voice. She shot a warning look to Oikawa as his hands found themselves back on her hips and making their way back up. He only cheekily smirked at her and returned to pawing at her cleavage.  She waited for a few minutes to hear her friend’s footsteps retreating before pulling Oikawa closer and aggressively kissing him. He tugged the towel around his waist off and hiked Y/N’s silky legs around him.

He carefully maneuvered to turn the shower’s knob and set her against the wall while a jet of hot water poured over them. And Oikawa went right back to devouring her mouth and grinding against her hot cunt. As soon as his cock made contact with her tingling clit, Y/N’s body spasmed and she tried to tug him closer. Her ankles interlocked at his waist and she tried to thrust below to encourage him to enter her. But he only chuckled at her excitement and continued to slowly slide back and forth. Y/N forgetting for a moment where she was exactly, enraged by his teasing smacked his thigh loudly enough to echo in the locker room.  Oikawa let out a low grunt and thrust full throttle into her. Her eyes widened at the sudden entry and she couldn’t even contemplate the fullness before he withdrew quickly once again.

“Fode me o meu amor,” Y/N begged.

Oh, that just wasn’t playing fair. He didn’t know what she said but her breathless voice and her needy eyes made him helpless.

 As if he could no longer bear to be apart without the drenched enclosed intimacy, he reentered without warning. Oikawa fucked her with the same hell-bent concentration he played volleyball with. She covered her mouth with her hand to contain the moans, that only muffled the noises rather than stopping them completely. The faster pace caused Y/N to skid up and down on the shower walls. She tried to find purchase against the tiles, but the hot water droplets caused her to loosen the grip. His breathing got heavier and uneven, why was it he could handle hours of volleyball, but the vise grip of her cunt made him want to spill inside of her like an immature adolescent?  He removed her hand covering her moist lips and thoroughly kissed her. He swallowed her moans and they stood in the shower making love for god knows how long. His hand found her engorged clit and his middle finger started pressing slow circle while his thumb and point finger started pinching it in time to his thrusts. Just as she was about to cum, Y/N buried her face in his neck. She bit down hard on his shoulder trying to contain the shrieks she wanted to let out. It wasn’t long before her spiral started to pull him as well, the constriction creating a perfecting suction to swallow his juices. He placed a hand on the wall to stabilize himself just before he pulled out of her and came all over her thighs. The water soon washed away all the evidence of their tryst as it flowed down the drain.

“Does the hot water feel that good?” Y/N’s friend called out. Soon of the other ladies started giggling and laughing along. “We’re leaving! See ya, Y/N!”

The two of them didn’t move from their spot until they heard the sounds of lockers being shut and the ladies’ voices being fading further and further away.

“I think they knew…” Y/N gasped a little embarrassed and horrified.

On the other hand, Oikawa kept smiling like a goof. “I love beach volleyball now! It’s my favorite kind.”

She let out a frustrated groan. “Just get out of my way. I need to get dressed before I prune even more.”

“Maybe next time you should call me papi,” he hollered out as Y/N started to dry herself and got dressed.

“There won’t be a next time if you don’t get your butt dressed soon or I’ll leave you behind.”

Y/n when she was all dressed up and ready to go, waited for him outside of the resting area. He came out joyfully whistling away and ready to leave. Oikawa slung his arm over Y/N’s shoulder and pulled her close. He was finally taking the chance to get closer to her like he always wanted.

“You’re going to be a handful, aren’t you?” she asked tickled with his antics.

He leaned in and pecked her forehead. “You know it,” Oikawa said with a wink.

[allisonxmoynihan]

illicit affairs (pt. 2) ~ a. turcotte

Requested: yes | no

Song: this series is loosely inspired on Illicit Affairs by Taylor Swift (you can listen here!) 

Part One: read here! 

Word Count: 1,988

The sun peeped out from behind the clouds, the first sunny day you’d seen since summer. You winced at the bright december sunlight, wiping down tables at the cafe, trying to prepare yourself for the afternoon rush of tourists and tired parents with chaotic toddlers begging to go back out in the snow 

A group of girls came in and you offered a weak smile their way, “I’ll be right with you,” you say, walking back towards the counter. 

The holiday rush was always your least favorite time of year, but it was worse now that he was gone. You hated seeing how cheery everyone was, how excited everyone was to be with loved ones for the holidays. But like the cold, bitter days outside, you were left realizing that your “warmth” was gone, off doing better things like he always said he would. 

“Hey, so can I get,” a slender, brunette girl with the most beautiful blue eyes you’d ever seen starts in an almost valley-girl voice before pausing, “Vanessa, what did you say was really good?” The girl turns to look at you, “Sorry, it’s my first time coming here, my fiance always talks about it so I need to try it!” She smiles.

You smile back, wondering where you had seen her before, but not being able to figure it out.

“Okay, yeah, can I please get a small skinny vanilla latte?” the girl says

“Of course, can I get a name for the order?”

“Sofia,”

And that’s when the images come flashing back in your mind, your hands going pale from gripping the counter so tightly. That’s her. You glance down at her hand, seeing the large diamond ring on her left hand, and your heart sinks all over again as he comes back into your mind. Him. The only guy you’d ever given your heart to, and you haven’t gotten it back after the months away from him. Alex had moved on, obviously, and your heart broke all over again looking at his fiancee, the girl who was everything you could never be for him.

“Alright, Sofia, that’ll be $1.50, and you can wait at the other counter for pick up,” you choke out, handing the order ticket off to your co-worker. 

You watch her and her friends walk across the cafe, the pictures from Alex’s instagram flooding your mind. You wanted, more than anything, for him to be happy; you knew he deserved all the best things in life and you really truly wanted him to be well. But you hated seeing that he was so okay while you were still hurting. You hated that you couldn’t be the one to make him happy. 

Your eyes follow her as she walks out the shop and runs up and hugs the dark haired boy you’d grown to love. The knife in your heart twists as he kisses her; and when he pulls away and sees you behind the counter, you swear you see hints of sadness before he’s dragged towards the town square, hand in hand with Sofia.

~*~

The sun was setting above the city skyscrapers, creating hues of pink and orange to scatter about your living room. Your head was resting upon Alex’s chest, rising and falling with each breath he took, his fingers twirling your hair round and round.

“I could stay like this forever,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

“Yeah?”

“Of course. I can see us, living out in a penthouse, coming home from hockey to you and our kids,”

“That sounds nice,” you laugh, tilting your head up to press kisses against his jaw.

“I love you,” he smiles down to press a kiss to your lips.

You smile, but the pain in your chest tightens. With each passing moment you could tell Alex was slipping further and further away from you and you didn’t know how to make him stay. You noticed he started distancing himself from you, only coming by when it was convenient or when he needed you. 

You push yourself off of him, sitting up and staring at the wall ahead of you.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” he asks, concern filling his eyes, begging you to confide in him.

You laugh slightly to try and keep the tears back, “Alex, who is she?” 

He’s immediately taken aback, “who? I don’t know what you’re talking about..”

You scoff while shaking your head, “you don’t know what I’m talking about? Alex, the girl who’s all over your social media”

He swallows hard, reaching for your hand, “baby, come on, she’s just a friend. You know you mean the world to me.”

Your expression softens at his reassurance, “but then why can’t I meet your friends? If i mean the world to you, why am I always kept a secret?”

Alex pulls you into his side, pressing a gentle kiss to your temple, “I’m just protecting you from my world,”

You relax into him, feeling better and protected. You knew the world of elite hockey players were different, that you didn’t fit the image. You believed Alex when he told you he was trying to protect you from the wrath and hate from his fans.

~*~

“We need to talk…” his stern voice fills your ears, your breath halting.

Your heart sinks as the elevator closes, “Okay, yeah, I’ll be at your place soon.” 

He abruptly hangs up the phone and you stare at your reflection in the elevator door. You felt Alex slipping away for months now, and you knew it was only a matter of time before he got bored and left. Before he found someone better and left you in the dust. 

You knock twice on his door before a disheveled Alex appears, stepping aside to let you in. He doesn’t kiss you at the door like he used to, just stares at you as you walk into his apartment. 

“So…” You start, breaking the uncomfortable silence that’s fallen over the two of you.

“This needs to stop” he states matter of factly without any hesitation. It comes out so mechanical and rehearsed, and you know he’s been thinking this for awhile now.

You look up at him, swallowing back the tears, “Alex, please, can we just try and talk this through?”

He shakes his head, “y/n, i’ve made up my mind. Whatever it is that we had, it’s over.”

“But-”

“y/n, I don’t love you, okay?” he snaps, and you take a step back.

“What did I do wrong?”

He sits back on his sofa, running his hand through his hair, “you didn’t do anything. I just found someone better. I’m moving on, okay?”

Tears threaten to spill, as you look at him in disbelief, sadness and anger combining in the pit of your stomach. “You’re an asshole,” you mutter, turning to walk out the door.

Walking down to his lobby you angrily wipe the tears away. The one boy you’d ever given yourself away to, the one boy you’d ever fallen for, the person whose happiness mattered to you more than your own was gone. And you didn’t know if you’d be okay again.

“Hey, y/n?” you hear his voice, smooth like honey, breathy from running to catch up to you, “take care of yourself, okay?”

~*~

Laying on your couch, you were thankful that the work day was finally over. For the next 12 hours you could just sit at home and relax, and forget all about Alex and his fiancee. 

You were watching your favorite tv show, stuffing oreo after oreo into your mouth when a loud knock startled you. You look at your phone to see it was almost 2 a.m., and you weren’t expecting anyone.

Cautiously, you get up and look out the peephole.

You sigh, opening the door up, “wh-?” you're interrupted with his lips harshly connecting with yours, pushing you backwards and kicking the door closed.

He lays you down on the couch, laying on top of you before reconnecting your lips and kissing down your neck.

“Alex, what are you doing here?” you breathe out, your hands instinctively sliding up his t-shirt.

He gathers some of your skin between his teeth and sucks down on it, “I need you,”

“What about Sofia?”

“We can forget about her for a minute,” 

You know it’s wrong, that he should be home with Sofia, but this is everything you’ve been craving since he pushed you away. As much as you know you shouldn’t, you give in to his desire.

He removes your clothing in a rush, admiring your body like he never has before, and you want to believe him. You want to believe that he really does love you, that he meant everything he ever said. That he only left you because he got scared of how real your love was.

He thrusts into you and you moan his name, throwing your head back.

“You like that, huh baby girl?” He asks, picking up his pace.

“Alex, please,” you pant

He kisses up and down your neck, and you know there are going to be marks tomorrow morning as he starts rubbing circles to your clit.

He grunts as he continues to thrust sloppily into you, “i know you’re close baby girl,”

You release around him, and he closely follows as he draws out your high, “i love you alex,” you say before pressing your lips to his.

He slips down your hall to get a towel to clean you up, “y/n, I’m sorry for how I treated you all that time ago,”

You hush him, “it’s okay, alex, it’s fine. We can start fresh,”

He shakes his head, beginning to redress, “y/n, i’m getting married to another woman,”

You gulp, watching him as approaches the door, getting ready to walk back out of your life.

“Thanks for tonight,” he smiles, before slipping back into the night.

You begin to cry, angry at yourself for letting him come back in so easily after everything he’s done to you. Angry that you would continue to ruin yourself over and over again if it meant he’d come back for just a moment. 

~*~

“Alright kiddo, I’m heading out for the day. I left a little present for you in the back to thank you for everything. Keep your head up and you’ll do great things,” Your manager advises.

You smile, “Thanks Carol, and I promise I’ll be fine out east, I promise.”

She smiles back, “i know, honey, you always will,”

Years had passed since that night with Alex. You sat waiting for him to come back for a year, and sometimes he did, but they always ended the same way. He and Sofia got married and you saw on instagram that he and Sofia had just welcomed a baby girl into the world: Isabella Grace Turcotte. 

Even after his daughter was born, he continued to show up drunk at your door declaring that he needed you. And each time you gave yourself away to him, hoping he’d choose you at the end of the night. 

But enough was enough, you decided you deserved more than being his mistress behind closed doors. You knew he didn’t care about you at this point anymore, that it was convenient for him that you were willing to continuously destroy yourself each time he decided to come back into your life. So you decided to leave LA and head east to Boston. 

Alex had moved on to the bigger and better things you knew were in store for him, he was the Kings best player, and you were happy his dreams were finally turning into his reality. It was time you invested the energy you had poured into him for so long into yourself. It was time you gave yourself a shot at turning your own dreams into a reality. And you never looked back.

[jaedore]

BINDING BONDS | 2

< prev | next >

parings: jung jaehyun x reader

genre: ceo!au, arranged marriage!au, consumption of alcohol, asshole/player Jaehyun, swearing

[ ☽ smut | ◇ angst ]

note: BB deals with themes of mental and physical abuse, which can be upsetting for some readers. If you feel uncomfortable reading these types of plots, you are advised to not continue

[ 6.4 k words ]

You stood appalled at what you just heard. What. The. Fuck. You thought to yourself as you saw Jaehyun driving off to who knows where. He really had the nerve to say that huh? 

You stomped to your car and drove off back to your place. You just wanted to be alone, process through everything. Haewon wanted to go shopping but the meeting drained you. You came back home, changed into sweats, laid back in bed, and turned the television on. 

It stayed like that for the next two weeks, you woke up, went to work, came back to your apartment, and laid in bed while the tv in the background. After you told Haewon the news, she would usually drop by to give you some positive energy, but she knew that whenever you were going through something hard, you needed to be alone. 

One weekend, you heard a knock at your door. You weren’t expecting anyone so you wondered who was at your door. You peeked through the peephole and your eyes widened as you shot away from the door. 

What? Nooo, why is he here?? Maybe if I don’t say anything, he’ll think that I’m not home and he’ll leave. 

“Y/n, open the door, I know you’re home,” Jaehyun knocked again. 

Silence. 

“My parents told me to come,” He commented. 

You paused a bit before opening the door, “what do you want?” you narrowed your eyes as he walked past you into your apartment, welcoming himself. 

“My parents told me to help you pack,” he turned towards you, “we’re moving into the apartment soon.” 

There wasn’t a way to run away anymore. This was it. You sighed and told him to follow you to your room. You grabbed the boxes that your mom gave you a few days ago and started putting clothes in them. You gave a box to Jaehyun and told him to start boxing up all the small things. He narrowed his eyes at you, he hated being bossed around, but he knew he had to or you’d snitch on him. The last thing he wanted was to deal with his temperamental father. 

The two of you went on throughout the day without speaking to each other, there wasn’t anything to say. He still made you angry by the way he spoke to you outside of your house two weeks ago. Jaehyun was also angry, but it was because he blamed you for everything. 

“I’m ordering pizza, you gonna eat?” Jaehyun asked from outside your bedroom. 

You looked at your clock and realized that it’s suddenly 7:30, “no I’m okay,” you replied, folding your clothes. 

“Suit yourself,” Jaehyun mumbled walking away to your living room. 

Soon, the pizza delivery guy came and your apartment smelled so good. You walked to see Jaehyun sitting on the floor, eating a slice as he scrolled through his phone. He seemed to notice you looking.

“I asked if you were hungry and you said you weren’t so…” Jaehyun replied. 

“Whatever,” you whispered and sat down across him. 

He was in your apartment. Jaehyun didn’t have the right to refuse you anything, no matter if he asked if you wanted to eat before or not. 

“What do you think you’re d-” Jaehyun spoke, but you interrupted him with your actions. 

You took a slice, instantly taking a bite and savoring it. You were so busy packing the entire day, you forgot to eat. Jaehyun kept his gaze on you as you kept eating, you knew he wasn’t admiring you, he was boring his irritation into you. Sensing it, it made you uncomfortable. You immediately felt small under his dark aura, so after one piece you stood up and walked to your bedroom.

“I’m not hungry anymore, have the rest,” you said, not turning back as you shut the door. 

“Y/n, wake up,” you felt the blankets rip off of you. 

“What the heck???” You yelled. You scooted back until your back hit the headrest, “what are you doing?” 

“I slept here, you fell asleep on the floor last night, so I put you in bed and slept on the couch.” Jaehyun explained pointing behind him. 

He put me in bed? He didn’t-you looked down and saw your clothes from yesterday were still on. You sighed in relief. 

“Why didn’t you just go home? This is my apartment and I don’t remember telling you that you could stay,” you retorted. 

“What if I wanted to spend some time with my lovely wife?” Jaehyun got on top of your bed and started crawling towards you. 

“Fiance.” You corrected him, narrowing your eyes. You were scooting back from his proximity. 

Soon, he was in front of your folded legs, “w-what are you doing?” you quietly murmured. 

“What do you want me to do?” Jaehyun’s face was inches from yours, you could smell his cologne. 

You sat still in your place, as much as you wanted to move, you were paralyzed in the position. 

Jaehyun’s arms rose above you, gripping the headrest and trapping you, “maybe I’ll just do whatever I want to do then,” he smirked down at you. 

“Get off,” you pushed him away, finally snapped out of whatever trance you were in. You ran to the bathroom to shower and get some air. 

Jaehyun sat on the edge of your bed and chuckled to himself. He found a little muse in provoking you. Since you were gone, he couldn’t help but look and walk around your room. He stopped at a drawer of pictures of your childhood pictures. He found amusement in the picture of you crying when you were sitting on Santa's lap when you were a toddler. He walked to the box of pictures and the one that caught his eye was the one of your college graduation. You were holding your diploma proudly and your smile shined brighter than the sun. Jaehyun dropped the picture back into the box, not wanting to see anymore of your pictures before he started to feel any different. 

“Hey! Be careful with that, that’s my college graduation picture!” You scolded him as you picked up the frame, checking if there were any cracks. 

“Relax princess,” Jaehyun side-eyed you. 

Jaehyun watched as you checked the picture frame. You had your towel wrapped around yourself and your wet hair fell onto your shoulders. You smelt like clean cotton and coconut. Jaehyun averted his eyes and walked into the living room. 

“I’m heading home, meet me at our new apartment in an hour,” Jaehyun said. 

You ignored him as he walked out of your apartment. When you heard him shut the door to your apartment, you sighed and slumped onto the rug. It took awhile for you to finally get up and get yourself dressed. 

You walked to the kitchen to make yourself something before you had to leave. As you walked past the living room, you groaned in annoyance, “he didn’t even clean up after himself.”

Of course you cleaned up the mess Jaehyun made. You mumbled to yourself how much of a teenage pig he acted like. He annoyed you so much you just wanted to pull out all of his hair. Once you were done, you made your way to your new shared apartment. Jaehyun was already there, one hand in his pocket, and the other holding onto his phone. 

“About time,” he mumbled when you walked up to his side. 

You ignored him and walked ahead towards the landlord. Your patience with him was running thin and you didn’t know if you could survive this with him. 

“Hello, you must be y/n and Jaehyun,” he greeted. 

“Hi,” you shortly greeted back. 

The landlord showed the two of you the new apartment. There were two bedrooms across from each other and two bathrooms. Both of the bedrooms were upstairs, the master bedroom taking up one bathroom while the other remained as the main one on the main level. Instead of a hallway, there was a platform to walk across to enjoy the view while the staircase sat in the middle. 

The windows in the living room and bedrooms stretched from the floor to the ceiling, bringing in natural light. The kitchen and bathrooms were the perfect size for the both of you. As much as you hated to admit it, you were excited to move into the apartment, it was perfect because it met your expectations. 

“When is the expected move-in date?” the landlord asked. 

“Next weekend,” you replied, checking out the closet. 

A while after the landlord left, you stood with your hands shoved in your pockets as you peered out the living room window, admiring the view. Jaehyun walked up beside you in the same stance. 

“There’s no way in hell we’re going to be sharing bedrooms. Sharing an apartment with you is already hard enough,” he sighed, not sparing you a glance. 

“Glad we could finally agree on something,” you replied. 

You no longer wanted to be around him, he drained everything out of you, so you left. When you got to your own place, you fell back onto your bed. As you were going to close your eyes, your mother called. 

“Yes, mother?” You greeted. 

“Did you go see the apartment with Jaehyun today?” she curiously asked. 

“Yeah, I just got back,” you replied. 

“Oh great! Did you two like it?” 

“Yeah, it’s great mother,” you tiredly replied. 

“Take this week off to pack all your things. There’s not a lot to do, so I’ll handle it,” your mother offered. 

“Really? No, it’s okay mother I can come in,” you persisted. 

“Y/n, don’t worry about it, take care of yourself,” she said caringly. 

You spent the week packing up all your things, Haewon usually came over to help. It was fun when she did, she always brought soju and you two would always look through memory books of you two and laugh. You wouldn’t get any packing done, so you told her to stop bringing soju whenever she came to help. Fortunately for you, Jaehyun never came back to your place. 

While you were packing every night, Jaehyun was out partying at Taeyong’s nightclub those nights. It was the same routine, him getting wasted, kissing different girls every night, and Taeyong ending up taking Jaehyun to his home. Since Jaehyun’s place was empty. 

“Jae, you can’t keep going on like this, especially when you move in with y/n,” he carried his drunk friend into his place. 

“Whatever, I don’t care,” Jaehyun slurred as Taeyong gently laid him down on his bed. 

“You really don’t want to move in with her huh?” Taeyong shook his head. 

“Nope” Jaehyun responded, popping the last syllable, “I can’t stand her,” 

“And why is that?” Taeyong tucked his friend under the covers. 

“She bosses me around like she owns the place. I hate those kinds of people. They think the world revolves around them. She probably uses mommy and daddy’s money,” Jaehyun spat. 

“And that’s any different from you?” Taeyong laughed at Jaehyun’s unreasonable reasons. 

“Yes, I hate my parents and they hate me,” Jaehyun started to cry. 

“Okay okay, I think it’s time for you to get to bed,” Taeyong cooed his friend. 

“Can you please stay? I might throw up,” Jaehyun wiped the tears that stained his cheek to see his friend nodding. 

The next morning, Jaehyun woke up with a throbbing headache. He looked at his phone seeing that he received a text from Taeyong. 

[ Tae: I made sure you were okay before I left for work this morning. Take some medicine after you eat something. ]

Jaehyun turned his phone off and stripped down to take a shower. The smell from last night caused him to be nauseous, which resulted in him hurling into the toilet. He flushed the sight in front of him and rubbed his temple, hoping the headache would dissipate. Today was the day the two of you would be moving in together and he wasn’t ready for it. He wasn’t ready to share his space and time, he was going to go insane. 

As soon as he got out of the shower, he received an angry voice message from his father, “you fool, where are you? Get over here right now!!” 

Jaehyun frustratedly sighed, he held a complicated relationship with him. Sure, his father was respectful in public and to others, but it was all part of a show. His father was ruthless to Jaehyun, he was lucky that his mother was treated somewhat decently. Nights when Jaehyun’s dad came back wasted, were the worst. He would thrash his anger on Jaehyun, leaving physical and mental scars.

Jaehyun knew what his father meant when he called. Jaehyun was supposed to be at the new apartment this morning, but instead, he woke up at noon with a hangover. He locked the door to Taeyong’s apartment and took a cab to his new apartment. From the looks of it, you were already there, your parents were there, and so were his. 

You saw him walk through the door with his head hung low, his eyes were puffy and his face was swollen like before when he and his parents were at your parents place. 

“Jae, you’re here,” his mother walked up to him. 

“Yeah,” Jaehyun softly spoke. 

“Well it’s about time,” Mr. Jung looked at his son’s appearance, sighing in what sounded like disappointment , “we were just discussing the rooms.” 

“Yes, I think it’s best if you two share the bed,” your mom commented. 

“Mother,” your tone signified that you wanted her to stop. 

“Just- just hear us out. We want you guys to just get comfortable with each other,” she finished. 

You paused for a bit before bluntly replying, “fine.” 

Once your parents left along with Jaehyun's, it was now the two of you. You looked out the window of your living room, looking down at little specks of people below you. You would do anything to be them. You would do anything to be out of this position and to be in the apartment stuck with him. 

“There’s no way we’re sharing rooms,” Jaehyun said behind you. 

“I know, I only said it because I wanted them to stop talking about it,” you said sipping onto the glass of wine you held. 

“Movers will be here tomorrow to bring my bed in. You can sleep on the couch,” Jaehyun said. He turned around and headed up to the master bedroom and shut the door behind him. 

You narrowed your eyes as you watched him go up to the master bedroom. What a gentleman. You scoffed. 

It was 6pm and he still had not come out. As you sat on the couch, watching whatever was playing on the screen, you held your nth glass of wine. You paid no attention to it because you were too busy engulfed in your feelings. The anger you held was engulfing you, angry at yourself, at him, you couldn’t stand him. How were you supposed to marry him? 

Your intoxication took over your actions as you saw him finally walk out the master bedroom. You walked up to him and grabbed his arm, turning him around. 

“You’re sleeping on the couch tonight, not me,” you bored your gaze into his. 

“Not happening,” he shoved you away and continued making his way to the kitchen. You were losing your cool so you followed him into the kitchen. You felt like a hot-headed teenager.

Like a child, you shouted, “suck my dick, Jung Jae-” 

Before you could finish your sentence, he swiftly managed to turn around and backed you against the kitchen counter, trapping you underneath him. You immediately regretted your choice of words. 

“Why don’t you?” Jaehyun smirked down at you. 

What the hell? Enraged with his response, you didn’t notice it when the swing of your hand met his cheek. Your eyes widen in shock, scared of what his reaction would be. 

Jaehyun chuckled then narrowed his eyes at you, “don’t you ever...EVER fucking touch me again.” his voice boomed at you.

You twitched when he shouted at you. You could only calm down when he turned around to make his food. That’s when you thought of the perfect idea. He never turned back to face you, so you made a run for it. You quietly ran up to the second level and into the master bedroom and shut the door behind you, locking it. 

Jaehyun seemed to have heard you shut the door, so he ran up too. 

“Y/n, open the damn door!!” Jaehyun pounded on the door. 

You ignored his yelling for the next couple of minutes. His string of sentences were stained with curses and names that would usually tear your sober-self down. Throughout the next hour or two, you stood before the door as you heard him trying to pick the lock. Every time he successfully did, you locked it again. 

“Bitch,” you heard Jaehyun mumble before giving up. 

“Asshole,” you spat back, his words were hurtful. As immature as it was, you cursed him back. 

You hoped that was his last attempt in trying to break in, so you washed yourself up and propped yourself into bed. The sheets smelt like Jaehyun. 

How come he smells so good, but his personality is shit? You thought to yourself. 

You stared at the ceiling wondering what tomorrow, next week, next month, or the next years would hold for you. At this point, you were crying. You just wanted to be alone, back in your apartment, in your own space of comfort and warmth. 

The next morning, you woke up to the smell of food being made. Curiously, you walked downstairs to see if Jaehyun was cooking. And he was, but you soon found out he only made it for himself once you saw there weren't any leftovers. 

“You didn’t think to leave me some?” You whispered, staring at the empty pan. 

Jaehyun heard you, he just chose to ignore you. He quickly finished his plate and set it in the sink, walking off. 

You knew he was going upstairs, but his movers were coming in with his bed today, so you just shrugged it off, the master bedroom was going to be yours anyways. You managed to make yourself some toast and a side of fruits. You were thankful that both parents bought some food, so you two didn’t have to go out to buy them for the first few days. 

You spent the afternoon straightening things up and making minor adjustments to the decoration of the apartment. When you finished, you made your way to the couch to get a headstart on some documents for work. You were so focused that you didn’t even hear the movers coming in. 

“I want the master bedroom, can you move the bed that’s already in there to the smaller bedroom? Then set my bed in the master bedroom, I’ll pay you extra,” Jaehyun instructed. 

“No, hey!! Leave the bed in the master bedroom, it’ll be easier for them if you just set yours up in the smaller bedroom,” you walked up to Jaehyun. 

“No, I’m taking the master bedroom. I already told them I’d pay them extra,” he callously responded. 

“Jae-” 

“End of discussion,” he interrupted. 

“You can’t just shut me up like that! I live here too!” You shouted as he walked away.

Once again, Jaehyun ignored you. You could feel frustration build up inside you. You couldn’t stand being in the same place as him. Everything he said, everything he did infuriated you, so you grabbed your keys and walked out. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” Jaehyun voiced behind you. 

You were the one to ignore him this time and kept going down the hall, eventually exiting the apartment building. Fuck this. Fuck Jung Jaehyun. Fuck this marriage. You slammed your car door shut and took a deep breath. 

You tried calming yourself down, you didn’t want to let him control your emotions. You drove out of the garage and made your way to the pier. You needed to clear your head and that was the one place you could go without anyone bothering you. 

The wind took control of your hair as soon as you stepped onto the pier. As you made it to the end, you gazed at the horizon where the sky met the sea. Sighing, you dropped your head into the support of your palms. 

“Not the best day, huh?” a voice asked. 

“No,” you chuckled. 

“This is where I come too,” the voice commented. 

You lifted your head and saw a cute boy. He had high cheekbones and big eyes, his black hair danced with the wind as he looked out to the sea. 

“Me too,” you responded, “I’m y/n.” 

“I know who you are, I’m Mark,” he smiled. 

You shot him a curious look.

“You’re the daughter of the CEO who owns Audace,” he smiled, “my dad is the CEO of Lee Technology,” he whispered. 

“I’m sorry, I should’ve known,” you apologized, rubbing your forehead. 

“No, it’s okay!” he waved his hands in front of his chest, “you looked like you had a lot on your mind.” 

“It’s...something like that,” 

“Penny for your thoughts?” he carefully asked, “I mean, if you’re okay with it.” 

You chuckled at his awkwardness, “I just met you,” you shifted your head to the side. 

“That’s okay! We can just watch the sunset from here,” he chuckled before turning his attention back to the horizon. 

The two of you sat on the bench and exchanged stories and minor details about yourself. Turns out, you two are the same age. Mark was a little more goofy and usually you would wave it off as immaturity, but for some reason his personality seemed to make you feel a lot better.  

Darkness was starting to paint the sky and you figured it was time to probably get back. You exchanged numbers with Mark before getting in your car and driving off. You couldn’t help but laugh when you remembered the things you two talked about. 

When you shut the door to your apartment, you walked up to your new room, the smaller bedroom. It was on the other side of the hallway from Jaehyun’s. As you were making your way, you could hear noises coming from Jaehyun’s room. You tiptoed your way closer to his door and stopped when you heard what you heard. 

It was his grunts mixed with a woman’s moans. Your breath hitched, wishing you weren’t curious enough to find out. 

“Oh shit,” you heard the woman pant. 

“You like that? You like that, huh? Like my big cock in your tight pussy, you desperate slut,” he grunted. 

You could tell the pace of him pick up when you heard his headboard hit against the wall quickly. You wanted to move, but you couldn’t. You stood your ground until you heard both of them finish. 

You could hear the door to his room opening, but you still didn’t move. Jaehyun came out, half dressed, he looked deadpan at you as the woman he just banged yelled after him. You were so shocked at what just happened that you couldn’t comprehend a word she said. Jaehyun walked up to you, drilling his gaze into you. He didn’t say anything, the two of you just stood in front of each other for minutes until he walked past you. 

You scoffed in disbelief. It's the second day of moving in and he has already fucked someone. The nerve of this guy. You turned towards your room. Grabbing your pajamas, you made your way to the bathroom. The small bathroom didn’t have a room of its own like the master bedroom, so you had to use the main bathroom. You made sure Jaehyun wasn’t anywhere to be seen before you went.

You quickly showered, letting the hot water trickle down on you, drowning in the heat. You sighed as you quickly dried yourself up and walked back to your room. As you did, Jaehyun and the woman were at round two, or probably round three. You ran into your room, not wanting to hear anything anymore, and slammed it shut. 

How can he be so careless? There are probably dozens of people who know him. You two weren’t married, yet, but you were engaged. The media hasn’t published an article yet but as soon as they do, you two will already be married and when women find out that they had hooked up with him, a married man, it’ll reflect horribly on the two of you and your businesses. Especially when you inherit the CEO position of Audace and Jaehyun, Jung Corporation.  

No. You thought to yourself. He will ruin this himself. Let him. It’s going to be on him. You had to remind yourself from overthinking. Everything will be fine on your part. You took a deep breath and put on your headphones. You needed to block out the sexual noises somehow. 

As you laid in bed, you stared at the ceiling waiting for your body to feel tired. Although, half an hour later, you didn’t feel anything. You picked up your phone and dialed a number. It took two rings before the person on the other line picked up. 

“Hello?” his voice was coated with interest, wondering who was calling him this late at night. 

“Hey, Mark. It’s me, y/n.” 

“Hey, I was wondering when you’d call!” He excitedly said. 

You chuckled at his adorable remark. That night, the two of you talked for hours. You two just met earlier today, but you felt like you knew him since you were children. 

“It’s getting late, you should go to bed,” Mark yawned. 

“Yeah, you’re right. I’ll talk to you later. Night, Mark,” you smiled, hanging up the phone. 

If it wasn’t for Jaehyun’s door shutting, you wouldn’t have woken up. You slipped out of bed to see if it was the woman from last night. As you cracked the door open, you saw her rush out the door with her blond hair falling apart from its bun, her dress halfway zipped, and her heels hanging by her finger. 

“You going to stand there all morning?” Jaehyun asked. 

“You should’ve kept it down, I heard you two the entire night,” you said. 

“We had to block out your laughter last night,” Jaehyun shrugged, making his way downstairs. 

You mocked him for his comment. You slammed the door and waited until you heard him go back to his room. You needed to get ready for work, but he was taking his time. 

Screw it. You walked out to get yourself ready. As you came downstairs to get breakfast, you could feel him watching you from behind. 

“What do you want?” you asked him, without turning around. 

“Don’t come back home tonight,” Jaehyun commanded. 

“Good luck with that, I live here,” you scoffed at his attempt to boss you around. 

“Unless you want to hear-” 

“You can’t keep bringing in women every night for pleasure,” you began, “when the media releases the news of us getting married, those women who you’ve screwed will realize that they’ve been banging a married man.” 

“Why do you care?” Jaehyun picked at his breakfast. 

“Because it reflects badly on us and our businesses could lose millions, Jaehyun,” you replied, you didn’t know how else to respond.  

“You sound like my father,” Jaehyun abruptly stood from his chair, “and I hate that you do. So do me a favor, mind your own business and I’ll mind mine.” and with that, he left to go back up to his room. 

With your jaw clenched, you slammed the door shut to the shared apartment. Jaehyun made things super hard for you at home, so you hoped that work would be a little easier on you. Turns out, it was going to be a busy week. 

“Mother, I thought you said there wasn’t a lot to do,” you dropped your purse. There were so many files piled up on your desk that there wasn’t any room for your hands to type on the computer. 

“I’m sorry honey, but those are from this past weekend. We’re launching a new collection and departments solely need your approval,” you mother looked up from the papers in front of you. 

You instantly felt bad because she had as many files as you did piled on her desk. There were so many files you didn’t even know where to begin. The Marketing, Finance, Management, Trading, Design Departments all needed the files done as soon as possible. 

Throughout the morning, you ended up finishing one pile. You skipped lunch with your mother, so she brought you some sushi when she came back. 

“Sweetie, you should take a break,” 

“No, the Finance Department team needs the approvals for these accounts, so I have to get it to them as soon as possible,” you huffed, completing the file and opening the next. 

Your mother knew how stubborn you were, you got it from her, so she didn’t bother you any longer. You worked and ate simultaneously as you did the files. That’s how the rest of the day went, at the end of your shift you weren’t close to finishing, so you stayed later. You bid your mother goodbye as she told you to give Jaehyun a call to let him know you were going to be late. 

“Honestly, he didn’t even want me to come back home tonight,” you said to yourself. 

Getting back to work, you knew it was going to be a long night. The Finance Department was demanding, but it was understandable. They were one of the pillars of Audace. 

It was almost 10pm and you weren’t home yet, Jaehyun wondered where you could’ve gone off to, but at the same time he wasn’t that worried because he told you not to come back. Tonight Chaeyoung was coming over again and he wanted to spend more time with her. 

He and Chaeyoung went to highschool together. Before Jaehyun started sleeping around in his college years and after, he was loyal and dedicated to his relationship with Chaeyoung. She came from a rich family who owned an automobile enterprise, but that’s not the path she wanted to take. He fell in love with her the way she fell in love with fashion designing. Jaehyun fell in love with her because she was different from all the other girls his parents forced him to meet. She was like the fresh air on a spring day. 

Their relationship ended when the two graduated, they both went their separate ways. Jaehyun went to business school, while Chaeyoung moved to the states for fashion design. After years of studying, Chaeyoung finally came back and reached out to Jaehyun. She looked different, but still beautiful in Jaehyun’s eyes. Her hair was dyed blond and her face matured. 

That was last night you came back from the pier, Chaeyoung was over while you were just coming back. He cursed himself when he saw you standing out his door, he swore to himself to make sure it never happened again. That’s why he told you not to come back, so he was slightly hoping just this once, you’d listen to him. 

Back at your office, you finished with the Finance Department and managed to start on the Marketing’s files. You packed your bags and headed towards the elevators with the Finance Department’s files. 

After you dropped off the files, you sat in your car contemplating if you should go to the apartment or listen to Jaehyun and go somewhere else. 

“I’m going home, I live there too,” you mumbled to yourself driving off. 

You managed to make it back quietly, while Jaehyun and whoever was in there with him were doing their business, you stepped into your room and fell on top of your bed. You were way too tired to get undressed and shower, you figured you could just do that early in the morning before they both wake up. 

And that’s how it went throughout the week, you came home late and left early, managing to avoid Jaehyun. You didn’t know if it was the same girl or different ones every night, but either way, you avoided her too. 

It was finally Friday and you had one last department to finish. The Designing Department’s files weren’t as heavy loaded as the other departments, so you knew you would finish early and get to go home. 

You sat at your desk, looking through the designs of each set of the portfolio. You were so focused that you didn’t even hear your phone go off. 

“Hey Haewon,” you supported your phone between your shoulder and head. 

“It’s Friday! Let’s go to the club!!” She excitedly yelled through the phone. 

“I...I don’t know,” you sighed, you were pretty burnt out.

“But y/n” she whined, “people are talking about the hottest club in town, we have to go!!” she said through the phone. 

Haewon was always the party goer. You liked to party too, but most of the time you put your priorities above that. Her personality balanced your friendship, that’s how it’s lasted so long. 

“Okay, fine.” 

“Great! You can bring that Mark boy you’ve been talking about too!” Haewon laughed as she hung up. 

You thought about it for a bit, I guess it has been awhile since I’ve seen or talked to him. You gave him a quick call asking if he was busy tonight and turns out he wasn’t. 

With a smile walked to drop off the Designing Department’s files. Mark was coming to the club with you and Haewon, he was going to bring a couple of friends. You felt like a teenager again with a crush on him. 

This isn’t wrong though...right? You contemplated. Jaehyun’s hooking up with girls anyways...you brushed off the thought knowing it’d ruin your mood. 

“Good afternoon, Ms y/l, what brings you here?” A woman walked up to you. 

“I’ve approved the designs on these, so start when you guys can,” you said, handing the girl your files. 

You furrowed your eyebrows, you’ve never seen her before so you wondered if she was new. Maybe she’s an intern?

You called yourself off the rest of the day and went to the apartment. You wanted to take a nap, but the moment you stepped in, you saw Jaehyun and wanted to walk out. 

Jaehyun was surprised to see you, you’ve avoided him the entire week so he didn’t see you once. He knew you came home after work, he heard you shutting doors and taking showers, but didn’t bother with it. As long as Chaeyoung didn’t see you. Jaehyun saw how worn out you looked and figured it wouldn’t be worth it to pick a fight with you. You two looked at each other without saying anything. You were the first to turn away and walk upstairs. 

“I’m not coming home tonight,” you said, not turning your back. 

“Me neither,” he replied. 

“Where are you going?” curiosity sparked your question. 

“None of your business. I didn’t ask you where you were going,” he shrugged. 

“Fine,” you whispered and shut the door to your room. You desperately needed to take a nap, you stripped off your clothes before you slipped into bed. 

The sound and vibrations of the club could be felt as Haewon parked the car. There were several people lining up outside of the club and you wondered if this was a newer one. You two walked into the club, VIP because apparently Haewon “had her ways”. You tugged on the tight black dress that hugged your body. Ever since you’ve moved out, you never got a chance to shop so you borrowed whatever Haewon thought looked good on you. 

The club was dark, other than the fact that there were blinding colored lights from time to time, and the music pounded through your body. The dance floor was filled with several tipsy individuals who fell into their own lust. 

“Hey, isn’t that Mark?” Haewon pointed to a man sitting in one of the booths. 

“Yes!” You excitedly walked towards him. 

“Hey! You look great!” Mark stood up, offering you to sit, “do you want anything to drink?” 

“Um,” you thought for a bit. You did have a long, hard week so you deserved to have fun, “just get me something strong.” you smiled. 

Soon, you were tipsy to the point Mark had to slightly support you. You and him were on the dance floor, his arms gripped your waist as your back met his chest. The music moved through Mark’s hands, guiding your hips side to side against him. 

“You know, I never told you, but you look really pretty tonight,” Mark whispered closely to your ear. 

“Thanks,” you smiled, resting your head back on his shoulder. 

Mark could sense that the alcohol was starting to take a toll on you as you shut your eyes, “I’m going to get you some water, meet me at the booth in a bit,” he smiled as he walked away. 

“Okay” as soon as you could say that, something caught your attention. Or you could say someone.

“What the hell?” 

It was Jaehyun. There was a girl next to him who had her arms wrapped around his, blond, skinny, and tall. From afar, you knew it was the girl from the other night that ran out of your shared place. You didn’t know if you were jealous or it was because you were tipsy, but before you could stop yourself you were already making your way towards him. 

Jaehyun could spot you from a mile away, he spotted you on the dance floor and for some reason, he couldn’t rip his gaze from you. He hated to admit it, but you looked beautiful when you weren’t constantly in your work attire. You were the only one who stole his eyes on the dance floor, not because of how you danced, but because of you brightly you smiled. He hasn’t seen you so happy except for when he saw your graduation picture. 

That was until you two made eye contact. Jaehyun noticed you coming towards his way, he was in a hurry to walk away, but you were already in front of him before he could. And before he knows it, you were grabbing the collar of his shirt and pressing your lips against his.  

[chancelloramidala]

Staring at the Sun ➤ Evan Buckley

Chapter Seven: Confessions from a Robot Heart

warnings: vague mentions of childhood trauma, sex, drinking, smoking

masterlist.

After the long day she had, all Marceline wanted was to rest. Having Eddie back in her life and working with her was a pleasant surprise. Since Ollie’s death, the two of them have exchanged weekly emails just to keep up with one another. But then those weekly emails and occasional Skype calls turned monthly and eventually, yearly. It wasn't because Marceline or Eddie didn’t want to keep in touch or anything, but their lives just got more complicated to the point where they sort of forgot to call back or reply to that message/text/email.

And now, with Eddie working with the 118, it meant that he would be around more often, and Marceline wanted to make sure that she was there for him. She didn’t know a lot about his situation with the mother of Christopher… Shannon, was it? Only that she wasn’t in the picture right now and it was just the two Diaz boys.

She made a mental note while she showered to introduce Eddie and Christopher to Nicolette and Gemma at some point. The four of them would get along swimmingly.

Marceline then changed into a pair of grey sweatpants and a white tank top after stepping out of the shower. Her hair, as long and thick as it was, would take ages to dry so she just left it in a bun as she wandered into the kitchen to make herself some tea.

She popped open a window as she waited for the kettle to boil. Then she quickly escaped to her room, opening her underwear drawer and taking a pack of cigarettes that was taped to the bottom. Marceline has been trying to quit smoking, and it’s been an on and off kind of thing. She’s able to put off the need to smoke daily and channel her cravings for nicotine into physical activity like kickboxing, martial arts, yoga, and yes, sex.

And Nicolette hated it when she smoked, mainly because of the horrible smell that would linger afterward and how bad it was for Marceline’s health. So she tried to smoke when she really really had to, outside the apartment or at least through the window if she didn’t want to step outside.

But Marceline gave herself a pass for today, it was stressful as fuck and she just needed some sort of release.

Nic was at work, yet another night shift and Gemma was at a sleepover with one of her school friends, so Marceline was left alone in the Pierce-Bishop home.

She lit one of the cigarettes with her blue lighter and moved towards the window, making sure that the cigarette was fully outside before leaning over. Marceline would then suck on one end, causing the smoke to fill her mouth before she would inhale some of it and then finally exhale, puffs of smoke escaping her lips. The anxiety that once engulfed her dwindled in these moments when she inhaled and exhaled, causing a sense of peace to wash over her.

She continued to do this a few times until her cig was short enough to throw away.

Drawings that Gemma made were scattered along the kitchen counter she was leaning against, some of them stuck on the blank areas on the fridge. Marceline smiled fondly at them, glad to see that the seven-year-old was improving on her skills, she thinks. She tilted her head to the side as she tried to decipher one of the drawings, made with pink and blue markers. The lines were thick and thin, shapes scattered the white pages and if Marceline was going, to be honest, she had absolutely no clue what this drawing was.

Whatever, if Gemma asked she’d just smile and nod and say how she liked the colors. (Like, usual.)

As she sipped her passionflower tea after crushing her bud into the ashtray she disguised as a plant holder and threw away the evidence. Then she wandered towards her bedroom, kicking away the clutter on the floor with her foot before plopping down onto her bed.

A small sigh escaped Marceline’s lips as she rubbed a hand over her face and leaned against the headboard. Her shift today was a mess the more she thought about it and she just wished that she could forget about it.

Buck, god, she hated how her mind always wandered to that man. He had such a tight grip around her heart and didn’t even know about it. And maybe his oblivious knowledge was a blessing in disguise because he wouldn’t know how much everything he said or acted to her would affect her.

“I’m just saying! You only act all… human-like with Nicolette or Gemma. When you’re here with us, you’re this robot.”

She could remember how easily those words escaped his lips and how quickly she felt those words stab into her heart. Marceline knew that she wasn’t the most… normal person on her team because she didn’t actively make the first move to touch someone or talk to them, and how her voice was usually void of emotion and how seriously she always looked… but to know that’s how people saw her, how Buck saw her just hurt.

Marceline has lived a life where there were always people who never approved of how she was, namely her parents but that’s a whole other story to get into for next time. In short, her mother wanted her to be the ideal proper young lady who kept her mouth shut when something rubbed her the wrong way. A proper lady who knew how to use all of the formal etiquettes of the dining room, who knew how to get a man and become a person Marceline had no intention of being.

So she learned to brush off those comments after leaving home and kept living her life the way she wanted to and not depend on other people’s opinions of her.

But there were times where some opinions mattered to her.

Her first impression of Evan Buckley wasn’t the most... positive of things. Marceline Pierce thought he was a cocky son of a bitch who was here as a firefighter for the thrill of the uniform. And yeah, those things were very true when it came to Buck’s personality but that was just surface-level shit. There was more to Buck than an overzealous, reckless young man who talked way too much about his sex life.

Deep down, Evan Buckley is severely insecure about himself and puts on the false facade of macho confidence to hide that. He has a heart of gold that he wears proudly on his sleeve. He would do anything he could to save as many people as he could on the job, even if it would put his own life in danger.

Marceline first realized she was in love with Buck when she actively sought out to be in his presence. She’d make sure that she was sitting nearby when he talked with Hen or Chimney about some sort of menial fact that he researched the hell out of. Even if it was kind of secondhand, she liked to be around Buck, feeling that his infectious smile and energy deep into her bones.

And usually, Marceline likes to be alone and in her own little space.

The second time was when she memorized how he took his coffee and made him a cup before he came into work. A splash of creamer and two teaspoons of sugar.

The third time was whenever she looked at him and felt her whole body fill head to toe with butterflies.

And since then, Marceline Pierce has been fucked with anything pertaining to Evan Buckley.

As Marceline let sleep envelop her in a warm hug, she could only think about how much of a robot she was to those around her and started to wonder if they shared Buck’s idea of her.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

One moment Marceline was asleep—not dreaming because it’s been ages since she’s actually dreamt about anything—and the next she was awake with loud banging coming from the front door. She groaned and threw both of her hands up in the air, cursing whatever beings were above. Then she turned her head to look at the clock next to her bed, 8:45 a.m.

“What the hell?” She grumbled, mentally calculating how she only got like five hours of sleep. As much as she wanted to curl back into her slumber, the knocking didn’t stop and it was an incessant noise she loathed.

So she sluggishly got to her feet, a chill of cool air coming over her, causing a shiver to run down her back. The elastic that once held her hair together in a bun disappeared in her sleep, and she didn’t bother trying to look for it. Whoever had the nerve to wake her up after an exhausting shift would just have to deal with her long brown hair sticking all over the place.

As Marceline left her room, she wrapped her arms around herself, the cool morning air coming at full force from the open window she forgot to close. She mumbled profanities under her breath as she walked over and shut it before heading towards the door, not even bothering to check through the peephole when she flung it open.

“What?” she half-snarled and looked up to see the last person she wanted to see.

Evan Fucking Buckley stood there, face full of shock and his knuckles raised as if he was going to knock again. “Uh—“ He lowered his arm back down into his side as a sheepish grin fell on his lips.

“...You’re this robot…”

Marceline’s stare hardened, her lips pressing into a thin line to hide the surprise off of her face. “No.” she shook her head and was about to slam the door shut when something stopped it. She looked down, finding that Buck had wedged his foot in between the door and the frame.

“Wait, Marceline, please don’t.” he pleaded, his blue eyes shining as his hand slipped through to help hold the door open.

“I’m too tired for this shit, Buckley.” she exasperated, closing her eyes for a moment to pinch the bridge of her nose to push down to the well of emotions that fluttered in her chest.

“That’s okay,” Buck quickly said and gently pushed the door back open to little resistance from the other woman. “You can just listen,”

Marceline’s heterochromatic eyes flew across his chiseled face, seeing the desperation that was widespread over each line and patch of skin and bit into her inner cheek. “You have five minutes,”

Then she opened the door, turning around, and walked into the kitchen, grabbing the pack of cigarettes she left there from last night. Marceline didn’t even bother opening a window when she lit her cig, her hand tense and fingers stiff as she pressed it against her lips.

She watched as Buck slowly entered the apartment and shut the door behind him. He nervously looked around, his hands shoved into his jacket pockets as Marceline stared him down, leaning against the kitchen countertop as she blew her smoke downwards and nibbled on her cigarette, trying to suck out as much nicotine as possible to contain all of her stress.

“Four minutes and fifty-three seconds, Buckley.” she snapped at him, annoyed at how he was just standing there with his stupid hands in his stupid pockets while nibbling on his stupid lower lip.

“I’m sorry… okay?” he exhaled shakily before slowly looking at her. “What I said yesterday was me at full assholery.” she continued to stare at him, all emotion devoid from her face as she continued to smoke, her stiff fingers clenching around her cig. “I should never have said you, Marceline. I’m sorry for hurting your feelings.”

Marceline couldn’t help but let out a cynical laugh before crushing half her cigarette into the ashtray. “Surprised to find out that robots can have feelings?”

Buck winced. “Not my finest moment,”

“No, it wasn’t,” she said sharply before turning around to open the window because Nic would kill her if the smoke smell lingered on the furniture.

“Look,” he sighed and when she turned back around he was walking over, his hands splayed against the island counter. “I know I was a dick, okay? I said I was sorry but I feel like you’re angrier about this for no reason.”

Marceline snorted and rolled her green and brown eyes. “No reason? You don’t see the problem as to why I’m pissed ’cos you called me a goddamn robot?!” her voice was progressively getting louder with each word and her hands were clenched into fists by her side.

“Robots aren’t bad! They’re cool,” Buck lamely tried to defend himself as he felt himself shrink under Marceline’s sharpened gaze.

“You called me a machine. Something that doesn’t consider the feelings of other people. Something that lacks empathy and sympathy. Something that can go without imagination, consciousness, free will, complex emotions, meaning, and a fucking purpose.” Marceline didn’t know at what point she started to cry, but she felt some wetness gather on her cheeks and that there was an ugly sob lodged into her throat.

Buck instantly started to feel a thousand percent worse. “Marceline—“ he tried to step forward, feeling the need to comfort the woman in front of him.

She wiped her eyes with the back of her shaking hands and stepped back, pushing herself against the counter despite the edge digging into her back. “I-I’m… I’m not a… thing,” she whispered with a shake of her head as the hate-filled voice of her mother shot into her head. “I-I have my own thoughts, I empathize and sympathize… I have meaning and purpose… I have feelings.” She hung her head to look at her feet as she sniffled. “I have so many fucking feelings, Buck. So many it’s suffocating to have them.”

“I know, I’m sorry, I should never have—“

“—Just because I don’t exhibit any of those human attributes around you in the way society deems as normal doesn’t mean I don’t have them.”

Buck clamped his mouth shut and frowned, looking away from her. He fucked up, bad.

Still, silence and tension-filled the cold morning air, with both Marceline and Buck turning away from one another to compose their thoughts and themselves.

“And with Eddie— he was in the same boot camp as my childhood friend, who’s practically my brother Ollie. He told me himself that he died in that convoy that got Eddie his Silver Star, and he’s been checking up on me since then. I’ve known Eddie for a long time so that’s why I acted so… human-like when he arrived.” she explained, remembering that Buck had asked yesterday.

Yup, Buck thought to himself, I’m a colossal idiot.

“I have this… tendency to act like I don’t care about anything, I know that. I’d like to blame my parents for drilling that into my head, but we don’t nearly have enough time to unpack all of that,” she said softly with a short chuckle, earning Buck’s attention as he slowly brought his blue eyes to her green and brown ones. “I’ve learned to only care about a select amount of people. And I…” she sucked in a deep breath as the nagged part of her brain screamed, “You’re one of those people, Buck.”

Buck’s brows knit together in confusion. What?

“I’ve… cared about you for a long time, you might not see it but I do. I care about what you talk about… what you’re interested in… how you see me.” Marceline admitted, her heart slamming against her rib cage to the point she thought he could hear it.

He felt like he was missing something crucial that Marceline wasn’t saying. Not that he had any right to ask for the entire truth, but the words she selected… didn’t seem right.

“You—“ he frowned as he tilted his head to the side to get a better look at her and crossed his arms over his chest. “You care about me?”

Marceline inhaled sharply. Now or never, Pierce. “I… I guess care isn’t the… right word.” she pushed herself off of the counter and stared directly into Buck’s eyes, her entire body simultaneously feeling on as if she was inside an inferno and dunked in ice water. “I’m in love with you, Evan.”

Buck felt all the air in his lungs disappear “W… What?”

“Look, I’m not confessing my love for you for any kind of payment.” Marceline tore her eyes away from Buck’s so she could take a breather. “I just… I needed to tell you. You deserve that much.”

“I—“ he didn’t know how to respond to that. The only people who’ve ever told him that they love him were his parents and Maddie, and even then he didn’t really believe them. No romantic relationship he had ever lasted long enough for either of them to say the L-word. “Is that why you took those bullets for me?”

“Yes,” she replied without any hesitation. “And I would do it again for anyone I love that much,”

Buck’s eyes were as big as saucers at this point, feeling very overwhelmed with this new information. “You love—? I’m sorry, I need—“

Marceline shook her head. “It’s fine, I get it. I jumped this all on you, and- and oh shit, you’re still with Abby.” She stammered out and rubbed her hands against her face to suppress a groan. “Fuck, I’m sorry Buck I didn’t—”

“I should go,” Buck said as his feet brought him to the front door, his mind swirling with loud thoughts.

Love? Someone loves me? Do I love Abby? Yes, I do love Abby, of course, I do. But… Does Abby love me back?

“Yeah,” she nodded and cast him a desperate glance. “Wait, Buck?” His hand halted from turning the doorknob and remained silent. Marceline took that as her cue to go on, “I want you to know that I don’t expect anything else from you after this. We can continue being colleagues and nothing more. You deserve to know that someone loves you like really loves you.” Unlike Abby whose been gone for months...

“I…” he paused and pursed his lips into a thin line as he slowly turned around. “Mars, I need time… to-to you know, process all of this.”

“I know, Buck, I know,” she sighed softly. “But, if you want to talk, you know where I am,”

All Buck could do was nod, unable to trust what he could say before he left. Marceline watched him leave with a heavy heart and sobbed into her hands.

Nicolette and Gemma came home later that day to Marceline holed up in her room with half a bottle of rum by her bedside.

@skyslowalking @beelarson @rcvenscycle @whatdoesntkillyoumakesyoustrange for u besties <3

˚ ༘✶ ⋆｡˚ ⁀➷ AUTHOR’S NOTE: lol so that happened, huh

nicolette's story

[pucksnsticksnhockeyboys]

summertime mindset - pt. 8

facetime & another FaceTime 

masterlist for summertime mindset

Timing is hard to get right and summer doesn’t last forever. You and Tyson learn the hard way.

word count: 2.2k

note from the writer: it’s almost done! one more chapter and then the epilogue! enjoy and let me know what you think!

SUMMERTIME

“How’s your vacation so far?” You asked brightly, folding a leg underneath yourself as you took a seat on the couch in your aunt’s house. You were on facetime with your mother, having scheduled the call after a small bout of homesickness.

“So amazing!” She gushed. You were jealous, you could see that she was reclining on a beach chair, her face flushed from excessive sun. She launched into what could only be described as her itinerary for the past few weeks, as if she hadn’t been sending you daily updates and pictures.

“I’m glad you’re having fun.” You smiled, genuinely happy for your parents. They had been working hard lately, and it was a well deserved break.

“Okay, now spill. Who’s this boy you’ve been seeing that your aunt’s been telling me about?” She questioned and you flushed, noting the way your heart rate spiked at the mere mention of Tyson. It was crazy to think how in a period of two months that he had managed to make such an impression on you.

“His name is Tyson.” You told her, albeit a little awkwardly. You weren’t sure where your sudden bout of nerves had come from, you assumed it was because this was the first time you had officially introduced a boy to your mom.

“Is he the reason you’re so smiley now? What’s he like?” She smiled, encouraging you to continue. Briefly, you wondered if you were so obviously happy with Tyson that even your mom noticed through a facetime call, but chose to ignore it for the moment and answer her other question.

“He plays hockey, like, professionally. He’s really sweet, and funny, and—”

“Are you talking about me?” The oh-so familiar voice called out, having let himself into the house. You had made plans to hang out with him after your facetime, and you must have been on the phone longer than anticipated, because as soon as you checked the time you realized you were supposed to meet him five minutes earlier.

“Is that him?” Your mom gushed, lowering her voice as if that would stop Tyson from hearing her. You nodded, a tight and embarrassed smile on your face as you greeted Tyson. He was grinning widely, clearly amused with having caught you talking with your mom about him. Your mother’s face turned dangerously gleeful, and you recognized the mischievous look in her eyes. Yelling, you realized she was talking to Tyson. “Come say hi!”

Tyson’s laugh was booming and you only grew more embarrassed as he sat down on the couch beside you. One of his arms swung innocently on the back of the couch behind your head, and he leaned into the frame of your camera with his charming smile—the same one you had seen him use on both your aunt and grandmother.

“Hi, ma’am.” He said politely, and even you chuckled at his response. You could tell your mom was impressed by his politeness as she told him with a smile that he didn’t have to call her that. “So where are you from, Tyson?”

“I live next door, actually. I play hockey in Colorado, though.” He explained, and that simple comment had your thoughts completely derailed from the conversation Tyson and your mother were having. You had known all along that at the end of the summer, he would have to go back to Colorado and you’d go back to college, but it hadn’t exactly hit you until that moment.

You let your head fall on Tyson’s shoulder as your mom went on about some rude woman she had run into several times in the hotel she had been staying at, a story you had heard no less than three times already. Tyson was nodding along and adding in comments as if she was an old friend and it was the most interesting thing in the world, and you couldn’t help but hate the fact he got along so well with her.

He was such a good guy, too good of a guy to have to leave in a few short weeks.

You finished the call leaning against Tyson, and when your mom finally had to go, she bid you both goodbye with a knowing smile you hoped he didn’t see. You sighed after hanging up the call, feeling his arm drop around your shoulders as you curled your legs across his lap. He pulled you in close, both arms wrapped around you.

“What’s wrong?” He asked after a moment of silence. When you didn’t respond right away, he pressed a gentle kiss to the top of your head. You tucked your head under his chin in an effort to get closer to him, and he hummed to try and stir an answer out of you.

“I was just thinking about the end of the summer.” You said quietly. You would have been afraid he didn’t hear you, but you felt him stiffen at your words. He came alive seconds later, the hand that had been resting on the outside of your knee squeezing gently.

“What about it?” He started, but you could tell he knew the answer. He was just delaying the inevitable conversation that you didn’t really want to have either. You hesitated, unsure of how you wanted to express your concerns.

“I don’t want to get hurt.” You settled on saying, finding the curtains your aunt had picked years ago suddenly much more interesting than they were.

“I would never—” Tyson started, his tone frantic as he tried to assure you that hurting you wasn’t his intention.

“I know you wouldn’t, Tys.” You interrupted, feeling him relax at the way the nickname fell casually past your lips. You shrugged, awkwardly and with one shoulder, but he got the message. “Things happen, though. And I don’t want to lose you.”

“You won’t.” He replied easily, as if he had seen the future and knew matter of factly that you’d be together forever. His words had you pulling back to look at him, finding a serious look on his face.

“How do you know?” You hated that your voice was shaky, hated that tears were pooling in your eyes, and hated that Tyson smiled sadly down at you. He leaned forward, connecting your lips in a soft kiss that had you relaxed in seconds. When he pulled away, he didn’t go far, and rested his forehead against yours. His spoke next with such certainty that you were convinced that truer words had never been said.

“I’ll always come back to you.”

PRESENT

It was nearly a week and a half before you saw Tyson again after the party.

You were sitting at your apartment alone, and it was late, when a text came through from Tyson asking if you were home. You told him you were, and what movie you had chosen for the night, and then he left you on read. You frowned at his lack of response, but were dragged out of your thoughts when you heard a knock on your door.

You got up from the couch wearily and looked through the peephole, feeling tension leave your body at the fact that it wasn’t a stranger. Nerves quickly took over, and you open the door with a stomach full of butterflies.

“What’re you doing here, Tys? I thought you had to leave early tomorrow for a roadtrip?” You questioned, stepping aside to let the broad hockey player inside. He didn’t react to the nickname, and other than a strained smile sent your way in greeting, he didn’t acknowledge you. Trailing after him, you watched him curiously as he stood stiffly in the middle of your living room. “Tys?”

“I need to talk, and I need you to listen, okay?” He spoke for the first time since arriving at your apartment, his voice strained and tone serious. You nodded, taking a step closer to him. “I still really, really like you.”

You felt like your whole world was flipped upside down and torn in two. One half of you wanted to fall into his arms and tell him you felt the same way, because deep down you knew you still did, and part of you wished he had never spoken.

“I still like you so much, I was such an idiot for letting things end the way they did—and I know you said it wasn’t entirely my fault, but I could have tried harder.” He continued before either part of you could react. “I was scared of messing things up after we went long distance, and I was scared since we never officially put a label on anything, but I really liked you—like you.”

“I really liked you, too.” You heard yourself saying, not exactly registering that the words fell past your lips until you saw Tyson freeze. Liked as in past tense, as in, you liked him before, but now you don’t.

You were too afraid of what would happen if you corrected yourself, so you let the phrase hang in the air, which suddenly became thick with tension. You couldn’t meet Tyson’s gaze, but you could feel him burning holes into you.

“Do you think you could give me a second chance?” He asked quietly, taking half a step towards you but seemingly stopping himself. The few feet separating you from him felt like miles and you so desperately wished it was both much wider and nonexistent at the same time. You wanted to be closer to him, but you also didn’t want to repeat history.

“I need time for a relationship, Tyson.” You weren’t sure what he flinched at, the meaning of your words or the fact that you used his full name, but either way you hated that he visibly reacted as if he had been hurt by what you said. Because, in a way, he had been.

“I understand.” He said stiffly, nodding once. You weren’t giving him a never, but a not now. You needed time to think about whether or not you wanted to risk a second chance with Tyson, because no matter how long it had been, how much you had been hurt before, you truly did still feel your heart race whenever he was in the room.

He started to leave, and as he passed you on his way to the door, you grabbed his arm to stop him. He looked to you curiously, a sad look in his eyes that had your chest tightening and your eyes watering. You wrapped your arms around his middle, and he easily reciprocated, holding you even tighter against him. No words were exchanged, even when he pressed a kiss to the top of your head, even when you let go an unknown amount of time longer, even when he finally left.

You sat dumbly on the couch in shock after Tyson left, the door shutting softly behind him seemingly echoing in your apartment. You decided that there was one person you needed to talk to, and picked your phone off of the coffee table, pulling up the familiar contact and tapping on facetime.

“Hello?”

“Rachel, you will not believe what just happened.” You rushed out the moment your cousin answered the call. You see she was laying in bed, and you assumed that Michael was beside her. “Tyson just told me he still has feelings for me.”

“I mean, did you think he didn’t? The guy has been in love with you since the moment you met.” Michael called out, confirming your suspicions. Your stomach twisted and your heart leapt into your throat at the notion, and you chuckled nervously as Rachel shushed her boyfriend.

“What did you say back?” Rachel asked, sensing your distress. You sighed, dropping defeatedly against the back of your couch.

“I just said I wasn’t ready for a relationship. Which is true, but…” You trailed off, hoping that she knew you as good as you thought she did in order to pick up on what you meant. She nodded in understanding, and you distantly heard Michael say something about going to get a glass of water to give you and her some time to talk.

“You did just end things with Jon.” She offered, and you shook your head. While her comment was true, your ex had no bearing on your current relationship—or lack thereof—with Tyson.

“That’s not the problem. I just, I don’t want to get hurt again.” You sighed, admitting what had been holding you back.

“Things are different now, though. You’re both older and living in the same city.” She explained, shifting so she was sitting up

“So you think I should get back together with him?” You asked, hoping for a decisive answer. She smiled softly, and you knew you weren’t going to get what you wanted.

“I can’t tell you what to do.” She told you in a motherly voice, as if she wasn’t your age. “But I can tell you that I haven’t seen you as happy as you were that summer.” You laughed breathily, some of your tension slipping away.

“You kind of did just tell me.”

[secretshinigami]

routine and soft eyes

Author: @hazblogs For: @beyondplusultra Pairings/Characters: nearmellomatt, mention of lawlight Rating/Warnings: T, mentions of Mello’s scar  Prompt: Wammy House kids sleepover (A, B, L can be included, can be AU) Author’s notes: I had so much fun with this !!! soft bois…. thank you to anyone who reads it !!

Mello is positively fuming. Someone (who shall not be named, though if you want to know it starts with “N” and ends with “-ate River”) just got on top of Forensic Science and Investigative Skills and History of Crime and the Justice System. Those are Mello’s topics. They’re the best at these and they always have been (in the two years they’ve studied here. But that’s long enough, right ?), so the fact that Mister Nobody just came in and stole their turf… That’s infuriating. To top it all off, the dean did them dirty and assigned someone to the second bed in their room, knowing full well that they need that second bed for Matt. This week is just a pile of flaming shit.

As they swing the door open they are greeted by the beeping sounds usually coming from Matt’s bed, a comforting electronic melody. Matt doesn’t even turn around to raise his middle finger to protest against how loud Mello is, but that’s also common practice around here, so no worries. 

“Heard you got your ass beat,” Matt says a while later, Mello’s hand carding through his strawberry-green hair. “By the newbie no less. How’re you taking it ?”

“Matt, my hand is dangerously close to your eyes and you need those to play on that stupid console. Better not risk it.”

“Like you’d ever hurt me,” Matt grumbles, and the certainty with which he speaks makes their heart pulse just a little faster. Mello is hopelessly in love, aren’t they ?

The rest of the evening is quiet save for that same musical background, a welcome white noise as Mello finishes their essay for Writing Comedy. The teacher seems to have some trouble with their rather macabre humour so they try to tone it down for once - rather unsuccessfully.

“Also heard you’ll have a roommate,” Matt continues a few hours later as they prepare for bed - gotta put some moisturiser on that scar like a damsel doing her skincare routine, the doctor said, “or you’ll experience how actually painful it can be”. Talk about being threatening…

“I heard. I can kick them out.” Mello would do it. Without remorse, even.

“I can sleep in your bed too,” Matt offers. “But only if you promise not to kick me out from under the covers every single night.”

“Okay, first of all, fuck off, and secondly, why the hell would I want someone else to room with me ? You’re already here. You’ve always been here.”

“And I always will be, Mels. Just… I think it’s time you get out of your shell a little bit, you know ? You can’t keep pretending that talking to me twice every day and ignoring Linda a couple times a week is enough friendly interaction for the little pea inside your coconut.” Mello turns away from the mirror, moisturiser in hand, and sends a glare to Matt who sighs and raises his hands in defeat. “Don’t say I didn’t try ! Think about it, okay, Mello ?”

They do think about it. The whole night. They don’t sleep - it’s not because Matt snores but that’s the excuse they’ll use. Ever since the accident and the scar, people have usually been too impressed - or scared - by them to even consider starting a casual conversation. Matt was there even before, and he probably always will be, Linda is a weirdo who wants to draw them with a ponytail, and… Well, that’s it. Mello lives for schoolwork, to be the best and hope to right some of the wrongs in this world.

“Yo, Mihael,” the dean says when he sees them in front of his office the following morning. Lawliet is a TA at their university, still haunting the dorms. He has a creepy smile under his stupid raccoon eyes and he keeps using Mello’s birthname, like it makes any more sense to call them with that than to call them “xXx_sexy_blondie_xXx”, or however you pronounce that out loud.

“Lawliet. I saw you assigned me a roommate.”

“I did,” he smiles still, like there’s a joke Mello doesn’t get.

“Why ?” Mello would actually like to know - Lawliet never does anything at random.

“You’ll see when he arrives later today,” is the cryptic answer, and Mello sneers at their stupid fucking dean as they leave for their 8am lecture.

Because yes, multiple things are out to get their skin - though they won’t be deterred.

The day goes by in a flash, Screenwriting and Poetry being two of their most interesting classes, and by the time they’ve finished their Crime Prevision and Prevention homework at the library, the sun is well on its way down. Mello walks slowly to the dorms, enjoying the warm air - it’s still only September and winter hasn’t come yet. The music blasting from their headphones is a perfect background to the chill atmosphere, a few bird silhouettes dark against the wonderfully peach clouds. In a few minutes they’ll kiss Matt and they’ll eat a bite, and they’ll sleep knowing they’re safe now.

When they arrive in front of their room, a few cardboard boxes occupy the entrance. Shit fuck hell, they’d forgotten the roommate arrived today. All they can see from where they’re blocked from entering is a white blob of hair on top of baggy clothes, perched on the desk and looking at whatever Matt is playing.

“Uh, I’m supposed to be able to enter my own room,” Mello kind of yells. Only kind of. “Would you please not be a giant stupid bother before I even get your name ?”

“Sorry,” the snowball says, not looking sorry at all. “I’m Nate River.”

“But you can call him Near ! He plays retro games, which isn’t… let’s say it’s not my strong point, but I’m sure it’ll go well, we’re three whole weirdos with weirdo nicknames !”

Mello blinks. Near is still here. They blink again. Near is still here, looking a little like a frog with his lopsided smile, a hand playing with one of his curls. Mello blinks a third time and doesn’t expect Near to have packed his things and go, but that was a close call.

“Are you fucking kidding me,” they mutter. “Lawliet is gonna get killed.”

“You actually know enough about criminology to not be caught, so go you.” Near is smirking. Mello wants to cry. “But I would advise against it, because he’s dating that twink Light Yagami, the alumni who came last week to give the presentation about the War on Drugs and its consequences. He’s a police lieutenant now.”

“Called it !” Matt raises a fist in victory, taking five years from Mello’s lifespan. “Anyway, now that you’re here, please do help us with the last boxes. We’ve been setting up Near’s compy and it’s revoltingly difficult.”

“I will not- how can you ask me to- I’m gonna commit arson and this time I promise I’ll succeed !”

“Dramatic bitch,” Matt says jovially. “Just come in and drop your stuff, apparently someone from the ADA thing comes tomorrow to make sure the room is accessible with a crutch and to help Near settle in.”

Mello just now notices that Near isn’t fully standing up - he’s propped on the desk, a mechanical knee peeking through the bottom of his shorts. This changes nothing - though Mello feels the both grim and hopeful sense of community that disabled people get when they meet. Their ear still works wonky and their eye ? Not the sharpest either. Without talking about all the skin damage, the phantom pain, the- hell no, they won’t get into “reflective mode” without having eaten dinner first.

Reluctantly, Mello spends the rest of the evening avoiding Near as Matt and them help him settle in, surprised by the small amount of belongings he actually has - most of the boxes he brought are board games and hundreds of little kapla sticks. Is Near planning to recreate the Golden Bridge ? He looks like a nerd, maybe it’ll be the Death Star.

Routines are a persistent thing, and before they know it, Near has managed to get a small space - small, they insist - in Mello’s well-oiled machinery. He eats breakfast with Matt, a meal that Mello forgoes entirely, and he goes on unfortunate walks to his PT appointments, because he’s out of money from whatever government organism gives benefits to disabled people and can’t afford a cab. Mello thinks they should get into it a little more, maybe call their case worker, because ramen tastes worse and worse when you have it for every meal of the week. And then Near and Matt start talking about something or another, especially topics that annoy Mello, or Near gets a little too close to them while they both work on their assignments at their desk, his elbow barely brushing Mello’s side. It makes them shiver, but they will ignore that, thank you very much.

Another routine - bedtime - has gotten a little different. One single bed is enough for “one person and a half”, according to Matt, so the obvious solution to them being three in a two single beds room is to push the beds together.

“And now you have a perfect three people beddery !” Matt triumphantly declared. “Mello, you sleep in the middle.”

“Why am I in the middle ?” they protested. “It’s the least comfortable !”

“Oh well, we can take turns,” Near had snarked, knowing full well that the first one of them to sleep in the middle would have to accept defeat.

Mello does end up in the middle, Matt cuddled against their left side where the burn is, and Near an ever-closer presence against their right arm. It’s not as uncomfortable as they expected. Near doesn’t snore and he smells like minty toothpaste, a strangely comforting scent that lulls Mello to sleep way more easily than the five thousand melatonin pills they take before going to bed.

Oh well, maybe Lawliet can live a little longer. His boyfriend - Matt saw them kissing through the peephole, it’s official now - won’t have any (more) reasons to put Mello behind bars.

Near gets on top of International Law and keeps wearing strangely baggy clothes everywhere - or well, everywhere but in the dorms. Mello has time to get used to that mechanical knee, even asking a few questions about phantom pains on the days Matt is away and the itching gets unmanageable. Near is quiet like snow but they’re nothing alike in warmth, grey eyes like molten metal setting on Mello’s face and crinkling in a smile.

And it works wonders. One time they get a bad mark (for their standards) and they even study with Near for extra credit, a presentation about the death penalty that lasts about three quarters of the two hours class. The teacher gives them both full marks and Matt celebrates by crushing them both against his chest, the smell of motor oil and mint so comforting that Mello closes his eyes, just for a little while.

It’s winter before they have time to think about it, and finals go by in a blur of “no sleep, no food, no distractions”. They even manage to end up at the nurse’s office when they faint during the Criminology Theory exam, forced to drink sugar water until the world stops exploding in a million tiny stars when they move their head.

Mello thinks that surviving their last winter exam session ever - they should be able to find a job with a double Master’s degree in Criminology and Creative writing, right ? - deserves a celebratory nap and they sprawl on the bed as soon as they’re back from the last stupid oral presentation they have to do about stupid Foundations of Criminal Justice. Near is not in the room - which is weird, because he finished five minutes and thirty six seconds before them - and Matt is away for the day to try and get his internship at the garage, so they have the full three-person bed, and they fully intend to enjoy the luxury.

They enjoy it so much that they fall asleep, only noticing that time has passed because before they blinked, it was day, and it is now very much nighttime. Light giggles fill the room along with the muted light from Near’s bedside lamp, and Mello takes the time to relish in the quiet atmosphere. Hushed conversation rises from near the desk, giggles and the smell of hot chocolate both making Mello sit up at last.

“Lookit you ! Sleeping beauty arises. Though I haven’t kissed you yet,” Matt smiles, and he climbs on the bed to press his lips against Mello’s. “Love you,” he whispers as he pulls away and goes back to slump on Near’s shoulder.

At first, Near felt like an intruder each time Matt kissed them, but he’s become so embedded in their life that Mello doesn’t feel any awkwardness anymore - to the point where not including him has become the cause of their inner turmoil.

Because yeah, uh, there’s that. Near in a tank top and booty shorts, prosthetic being painted on by a very enthusiastic Matt, has become the new image they conjure up each time the need to strangle someone arises. And poof, instant peace. Discreet touches, Near sleeping fully cuddled against their right side now, Matt nosing through Near’s hair just after he’s washed it because his strawberry shampoo smells divine, Mello even going as far as ruffling Near’s hair without warning, just to see his little nose scrunch up… All that has become routine too, and suddenly the change is too big to go by unmentioned. 

They’ve managed to hold on to their feelings until then but as Matt starts talking again, Near’s smile is a little too tight - though his eyes sparkle, it’s like… something’s missing. 

“Emergency mee-ee-ting,” they yawn, the skin around their left eye crinkling up painfully. Near notices and doesn’t even ask before grabbing the petroleum jelly tube and throwing it rather inaccurately at their face. See, that’s what they were talking about, Near has just become… there, in the way Matt is there even when he’s asleep in another part of the universe where Mello can only hope to ever go to. “We gotta talk shit out.”

“Are you over your gay crisis yet ?” Matt asks, eyes calm and open, sipping hot chocolate with noisy slurps that Mello doesn’t bother mentioning anymore. His green hair looks more and more red as time passes, which is a strange feat of hair dye conspiracy. “Can we go back to playing ?”

“I haven’t even talked !” Mello protests. “I just really think it’s necessary to mention that…”

They don’t know how to continue that sentence. Near is looking at them with something strangely akin to hope, and Matt still has that infuriating openness about him like he just knows Mello so well he doesn’t need to be told what they feel. 

Near doesn’t, though, and he matters enough to Mello now for them to want to include him in the little bubble as well.

“I just think it’d be cool if we shared the secret chocolate stash with Near,” is what comes out of their mouth.

Well done caporal, please die of shame now.

“Mels, wow, that’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever said !” Matt’s voice drips with amusement - devoid of any mean spirit, they should add, because Matt is the one thing Mello knows is good in this world. And well, maybe there’s a second one they’ve stumbled on, and they want Near to know that he means a lot to them too.

“I mean it !” Mello whines. “He’s one of us now. I think we can share.”

“Mello. Please realise that I’ve been flirting with you this entire time,” comes Near’s deadpan answer. “The time I told you I wanted to braid your hair ? The time I made you sleep and finished the presentation alone because you’d gotten the flu and I hate being sneezed on ? The fact that Matt literally sits in my lap half the time, and only half because the other is spent on your lap ?”

“Okay, first of all, fuck off with me getting the flu.”

“You’re avoiding my question.” Near looks stubborn, and it’s a good look on him.

When did Mello start to think Near looks good ? “I, uh. I may be slightly romantically obtuse. Has Matt told you the time when-”

“-he kissed you and you thought he wanted to practice smooches for his secret best friend, because of course you wouldn’t be his best friend ?”

Utterly mortified, Mello can feel their cheeks become bright red. “Well, uh. Enough mushiness for tonight. Just pass me the chocolate, Matt, I’m starving.”

Matt giggles and throws a Kinder Egg at their face. Near munches on the leftover shell while Mello assembles the toy, and it’s peaceful - and happy, too, so when Mello raises a hand to their scar they smile still, in spite of their involuntary shiver.