#the things i'd do for this to become real.

[raven-of-chaos-and-insanity]

While I am absolutely against using AI to do your homework (and I'm against using generative AI for pretty much anything because it's a language learning model, it can't analyze), and I've never used generative AI, though I have seen how useless the results are when my PI (person in charge of my lab) uses it as a search engine, I do think the reliance on AI is at least in some part a symptom of a larger problem.

The first post the problem is addictive apps like tiktok, but I don't know what to do about that.

The other problem is I think with all the technology available, not including AI, both to students and teachers, the workload expected of students has become practically impossible to do while also living a reasonable life.

I will preface this by saying until my last semester of undergrad I had a 4.0, and in highschool I never had a grade lower than an A-. I am a fantastic student, I basically never have to study, and academic subjects have always come easy to me. So I am not a failing student railing against the institution. I'm a PhD student now, I chose to do more school.

In addition, my undergrad was 2019-2023, my sophomore year was online, the rest were in person. I did not have a job during the semester. I worked in a lab my senior and part of my junior year, but that was instead of classes, I got credit instead of getting paid. I graduated just when AI started producing things people would think about turning in, but only barely.

My freshman year I could just barely get all my work done and get 7 hours of sleep a night, but only because I had no social life. There was so much work to do that was automatically graded by the computer, so no professor or TA's time was taken up by it, so they could give as much as they wanted. I spent at least 12 hours a week, if not more, doing automatically graded busywork for 1 chemistry class. Other classes expected an enormous amount of papers, projects, or presentations, because technology meant that the work could physically be done quickly, typed, and researched with some cited images from google, and no professor had to carry it around, but the work still required as much thinking as it would have if I'd pasted my posters together by hand.

After we were back in person, it got so much worse. It was impossible to get all my work done and sleep even 6 hours a night. I had classes that required a paper every week, which would have been fine if they hadn't required other work as well, and if I didn't have 5 other classes as well. I had classes where I spent hours trying to understand the computer program they wanted us to use for that project, presentation, or even busy work, rather than just doing the work. In addition, I had professors fail to give all the instructions for projects or papers until a week before, or sometimes less, because they knew you could do it all from a computer in your dorm room, so no one could complain they didn't have time to go to the library or the store.

We also no longer had snow days or even real vacations during the semester because everything was turned in online, new instructions could be given to students by email, and class could be held online if the professor couldn't make it to campus. If you had a fever, you couldn't show up to class in person, but if you couldn't prove you were actively in the hospital, you better be on the zoom call the professor set up during the class.

Also, I don't know if it was new or if it's always been this way, but the attitude towards even officially excused absences was unconscionable, especially right after COVID. I had classes, and especially labs tell us that if we had more than 2 absences, even excuse ones, we should just drop the class because we would not be able to pass if we missed more than 2 days. And this was explicitly stated in at least 5 of the labs I took in undergrad.

All in all, the rise in students cheating with AI seems to be at least in part due to universities treating students like machines.

The classes where I got the most out of the work I did were classes where we handed in a draft of a paper, had it corrected by the professor, and then rewrote it and turned it in a second time for a grade. This seems like it would also be harder to cheat on with AI, especially the rewriting it step. These classes also tended to have less work overall because they weren't treating writing an entire paper as busywork.

Generative AI has destroyed academia.

In the next few decades we’re going to have thousands of people who don’t really know anything, and can’t do any critical thinking.

[lampridius]

hi! can i request something with boothill and a reader who he originally found as a very low level member of the ipc, but only because they were coerced and forced into joining? like an aventurine or topaz situation. the ipc offering them a stable life (where they didn't have any stability or safety) in exchange for work.

Then, boothill freeing them from the ipc and taking them under his wing? i'd imagine he'd realize they aren't a threat when he finds out their situation and how they really had no choice at the time, much like how he's willing to work with aventurine in 2.3.

Can I have some hcs about how he'd care for them and how he'd feel towards them? I think they hold immense amounts of guilt and paranoia that he'd turn on them or that they don't deserve his care because of the fact they got tricked by the IPC.

𝙃𝙎𝙍 𝙈𝙀𝙉 𝙒𝙄𝙏𝙃 𝘼 𝙍𝙀𝘼𝘿𝙀𝙍 𝙏𝙃𝘼𝙏 𝙒𝘼𝙎 𝙄𝙉 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙄𝙋𝘾 ᯓ★ 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗿𝘀: boothill ᯓ★ rules | masterlist | 𝗿𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁 ᯓ★ 𝗶𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝗮𝗱𝗱𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 ᯓ★ 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀:

#𝗕𝗢𝗢𝗧𝗛𝗜𝗟𝗟

you were barely a blip on the ipc’s radar. not a suit, not a name anyone feared - just a cog. quiet. compliant. desperate enough to sign your life away when they offered you something you’d never had before: stability. food. a roof. safety. you told yourself it wasn’t blood money if your hands didn’t pull the trigger. but it always found its way there, didn’t it?

when boothill found you, you expected a bullet.

you’d heard the stories - how he’d tear through ipc outposts like a storm with a drawl, how he talked shit and shot faster. and you, in your crisp uniform, even if you weren’t doing anything but filing numbers that hurt people - you thought you were next.

but he didn’t shoot you.

he looked at you, real slow, eyes narrowing like he saw something under your skin you didn’t know how to hide. “you don’t talk like one of ‘em,” he said. “and you sure as hell don’t look proud wearin’ that uniform.”

you told him the truth. hands shaking. voice small. how you didn’t have anything before them. how they gave you just enough to be afraid of losing it. how you weren’t clean, not really - not after all the things you’d let happen just to survive.

he listened. arms crossed. expression unreadable.

then he said: “well, sugar, how’s about we steal that freedom back?”

he pulled you out. not just from the ipc - but from the chokehold it had on your sense of self. he got you new clothes. gave you space. taught you how to shoot, not for him, but for you. said things like, “ain’t nothin’ wrong with choosin’ survival. what’s wrong is they made you think you didn’t deserve better.”

and still, you can’t look him in the eye some days. can’t sleep without thinking he’ll realize what a coward you were, what a fool you must’ve been to fall for their lie.

“you’ll leave,” you say one night, voice breaking. “you’ll realize i’m not worth it.”

he doesn’t yell. doesn’t mock. he just kneels in front of you, slow and deliberate, hat set aside. one calloused hand comes to your jaw, tipping your face up so you have to see the fire in his eyes.

“now you listen good, darlin’,” he says, drawl softened with something dangerous - devotion. “i didn’t drag you outta hell just to leave you at the gates. you think you were weak for survivin’? hell, i think you’re stronger’n half the gunslingers i’ve ever met. you looked the devil in the eye and said, ‘yes sir’ ‘cause you didn’t know you had a choice. i’m here to remind you - you do now.”

he stays. he chooses you. over and over.

and somehow, that becomes the most terrifying and healing thing you’ve ever known.

©𝗖𝗢𝗣𝗬𝗥𝗜𝗚𝗛𝗧 ● @lampridius 2025

[so-i-did-this-thing]

I just want to say thank you for all the things you say on here. I also want to ask, if it’s okay, how did you handle transitioning when it came to the what ifs? I’ve found myself thinking I might be trans more and more- but every time I think I’m getting close to deciding what I want to do about it I keep hesitating and now I’m worried it’s too late. I’m almost 30- I know it’s possible to transition at any time. But I don’t know if it’s worth starting a process unless I’d be satisfied with the result, and I don’t know if I’d ever get the opportunity to present how I want to.

I really admire that you’ve found what works for you. You seem so confident and comfortable, your style is incredible, and I always look forward to the good night pictures of your cats. I sometimes think that I could be like that someday, but I keep talking myself out of making decisions because I’m so scared of the risks. How did you know when it was time to start transitioning? Did you have to push through doubt or did it just feel right?

Thank you, and I hope you have a lovely day.

Heya, Anon. Thank you for the kind words. <3

I'm not the best person to ask about transition doubt, as I've always had a very strong male identity ever since I can remember. Once I learned about HRT and top surgery at 18, I knew they were for me.

But where I can help is if it's family that is holding you back. This article is something I desperately wish was around when I was younger - I spent an extra 10 years in the closet to appease family and it nearly destroyed me. (I came out the first time at 20, and started HRT at 33. Top surgery not 'til 40 because I was poor.)

Remember, there's always ways to try out a new gender presentation. I used cosplay to get used to presenting male in public. Haircuts, clothes, and binding go a long way. And even things like HRT -- you can start on a smaller dose, stop, start again... you're really in a lot of control here as long as you are aware of the timeline of effects.

There will always be things about medical transition that you won't be satisfied about. It helps to cultivate gender envies that share physical traits with you. There will be surprises, bad and good. But a lot of imperfections feel less so simply with age. And there is a lot to love about having a trans body.

So your real criteria is -- "will I be happier overall?" For a lot of us, transition erases a lot of the background radiation in our lives that kept us from flourishing. I knew it was time to transition because my world had gone so very grey with depression - I had increasingly become unreliable and wasn't taking care of myself or my home very well. I wasn't exactly suicidal, but I absolutely wasn't living.

I transitioned when I was dead broke, and though it was a slog at times to pay for things, it was the best decision I have ever made in my life. Transition removed a major source of trauma in my life so I could focus on fixing my other shit and become a better person. I still have depression, ADHD, and my autism sometimes gets in the way, but they're manageable in a way that was impossible prior to HRT. And yeah, I also get to enjoy days of euphoria, too. :)

There's risks to everything and transition is a lot of work, rewarding as it is. The risks range from embarrassment to violence, and the former is survivable and the latter can be mitigated with planning & vigilance.

I'd suggest simply planning for the long term while you try things out. Build your safety net with affirming friends, work on your job prospects, and simply be honest and kind to yourself. Remember that emotional vulnerability is not a weakness and that doubt can guide you on what to prepare for.

And even if you decide transition is not for you, the introspection and planning should put you in a better place for what seems to be an uncertain future for us all.

[weirdunclegamer]

I suppose every original universe full of mecha needs a "villain" of some stripe and this Zeong inspired machine has become one of two for the universe my 30MM bots inhabit in my head.

Attempting to use 30MM parts to make a Zeong-like machine with no real legs, just boosters/thrusters, was the starting point for this build, and it was definitely a long time of fiddling to finally get to this point. The release of the verdenova kit gave me that very sazabi/sinanju esque upper body to work with, and a good backpack. Zeon machines use axes too right? Bout time I gave a bot an AXE to AXE things with, and hey I've got this big fucking shield from one of the option sets, thats like... the gyan or something right? Sure!

The legs were unsurprisingly the biggest point of iteration, while I got the front legs designed pretty fast, using the thighs off the giant provedel kit, the back "legs" went through lots of changes to try and get them in the right position and with some amount of stability and aesthetics.

One of my big problems when building 30MM bots is my sometimes obsessive insistence on every thruster being articulate on more then one axis so they can be posed more dynamically. So more reasonable, and stronger connection, setups get thrown to the wayside as I force ever and more joints onto things XD

The funnels, in-universe, can shoot lasers along with projecting the beam blades you see in the one picture, the shield has a moderately strong barrier projector inside it, but otherwise what you see is what you get. A relatively huge and very fast machine that shows up unannounced on a battlefield and chops shit in two with little effort, I of course imagine it getting into an altercation with my other bots of The Family. But thats all in the head of course.

Now if only I actually painted my kits... but man... anxiety really stymies creative endevours due to fear. I dunno what kind of color scheme I'd give this guy either, I'm really bad at that sort of design, especially when I can do literally whatever and am not just coloring over pre-chosen areas of a thing like in video games.

Super happy with this guy either way, so not gonna worry about it.

[nottodaysari]

Wonderwall

Chapter one- directions?

Well, shit.

I stared at my phone like it had personally betrayed me. Dead. Of course it was dead. And of course I was stranded with a half-hour walk to a restaurant I couldn’t find in a city I barely knew. The only thing missing was dramatic rain to complete the scene.

I glanced up and scanned the street, hoping for a miracle—maybe someone with a working phone, a teleportation device, or at least a caffeine boost. No luck. Just strangers rushing by, honking cars, and my social anxiety ramping up like it was training for the Olympics.

Then I saw him.

Tall. Ridiculously attractive. Blue eyes with main-character energy. Hair like he was in a shampoo commercial. Fantastic. A hot guy, just what I needed while looking like I'd lost a fight with the wind.

Whatever. Desperate times.

“Hey! Excuse me?” I called out, speed-walking toward him like I might combust if he ignored me.

He turned. Raised eyebrows. Mild curiosity. Definitely smug.

“Yeah?” he said. Voice smooth. The charming kind of cocky.

“My phone died. I’m totally lost. I’m trying to get to a place called Salsa’s—it’s a restaurant, not a dance class, though I’d probably fail at either—and I have zero idea where I’m going. And talking to strangers isn’t exactly in my comfort zone, but here I am.”

He smiled. “Damn. Breathe, Speed Racer.”

Right. Oxygen.

I exhaled and gave him an awkward smile. “Sorry. Minor meltdown.”

“You’re fine. I’m actually headed to Salsa’s, if you want to walk with me.”

“You’re kidding. Seriously?”

“Nope.”

“You’re a lifesaver. I might actually love you.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

“I’m joking. Mostly. But thanks.”

We started walking. I shoved my phone in my jacket pocket like it was the real villain here.

“So, how far is this place?”

“About thirty minutes.”

I groaned. “Perfect.”

We walked in silence for a bit. It got awkward fast, so I did what I always do—talked to fill it.

“So, what’s your name, mystery guy?”

“Matt. You?”

“Mhia. With an H.”

He blinked. “Where’s the H?”

“Ask my mom. She wanted to be creative. Starbucks has never recovered.”

He laughed. “I like it. Unique.”

“I aim to confuse.”

He gave me a playful look. “Are you always this dramatic or just today?”

“Depends. Are you always this confident or were you born that way?”

“Touché.”

“Thanks. I balance sarcasm and sincerity pretty well.”

He smirked. “You meeting someone at Salsa’s or just wandering Vegas like a sitcom character?”

“Meeting a friend. She ditched me to flirt with a bartender. I respect the strategy.”

Matt chuckled. “I’m meeting my brothers. They’re probably still at the hotel trying to become a boy band.”

“How many brothers do you have?"

“Two.”

“And you’re here for work?”

“Kind of. We make videos. Social media stuff.”

I paused. “So… influencers?”

He shrugged. “We prefer ‘internet personalities.’”

I gave him a look. “So if I trip, it’s going on TikTok?”

“Only if it’s hilarious.”

“Fair.”

We were almost at the restaurant, and weirdly, I didn’t want the walk to end. He was easy to talk to, which honestly seemed unfair. Tall, attractive, funny, charming? Suspicious.

“So what about you?” he asked. “Anything scandalous?”

“I’m a receptionist at a gym,” I said. “Living the dream.”

He nodded like that was impressive. “Free protein bars and front-row seats to gym drama. Nice.”

“You’d be shocked how many shirtless guys think mid-deadlift flirting is effective.”

“Let me guess. One of them wore toe shoes?”

I blinked. “Okay, creepy accurate.”

We both laughed as we stepped into Salsa’s. The place smelled like heaven and poor decisions. He held the door open.

“Chivalry isn’t dead, huh?”

“Not while I’m around.”

“Cocky.”

“Confident.”

“Debatable.”

We got in line and I looked at him. “Let me cover your food. You saved me from wandering into a dive bar and crying.”

“No chance. I’m paying. For your food, at least.”

I grinned. “How generous. However will I repay you?”

He smiled. “Maybe with your number?”

I laughed. “Maybe. But only if you don’t order something weird.”

“Tacos okay?”

“Tacos are a love language.”

“Then I’ll have whatever you’re having.”

“Solid choice. What do you want to drink?”

“Root beer.”

I blinked. “What are you, ten?”

He gasped like I insulted his family. “Root beer is elite. Don’t judge me.”

I held up my hands. "Smile and nod, smile and nod…”

He laughed, and I joined in without thinking. We grabbed our food and sat across from each other in a booth.

As we are and we talked and talked until there was no food left on our plates and no liquid left in our cups. "Matt thanks for this really great meal, I have to go now" I said in a sad tone.

His smile immediately faded and and he looked down at his phone for a moment, that moment was the longest it had been quiet between us. "Mhia, can I get your number?" He asked handing me his phone opened to new contacts.

"of course, you better text me though" I said in a joking tone but completely serious. "Oh you're gonna regret saying that, one day you're gonna beg for me to stop texting you" I rolled my eyes and started typing in my number.

I handed him his phone back and took a step so I was directly next to him I bent down and kissed him on the cheek "bye matt". His cheeks flushed and he spoke in a slightly higher pitch "bye mhia".

I sprinted back to the hotel like my life depended on it. In my head, all I could think was: the sooner I charge my phone, the sooner he might text me.

God, I hope he texts me.

Matt wasn’t just attractive—he was the whole package. Funny, easy to talk to, and somehow, it felt like our personalities just clicked. It was rare. Weird. Kind of amazing.

I rushed into the hotel lobby and made a beeline for the elevators. Naturally, they were taking forever, moving at the speed of a dramatic pause in a soap opera.

Ariana was going to be proud of me. Matt was the first guy I’d shown actual interest in in weeks. Months, maybe. Something about him just hit different—like he’d been dropped into my life by accident, or fate, or some very generous matchmaking algorithm.

As soon as the elevator dinged open, I speed-walked to my room, too distracted to pay attention to where I was going. Which was exactly how I crashed—full force—into someone.

The impact knocked me clean off balance, and I stumbled backward, landing on the hotel hallway carpet that had definitely seen better days.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” I said, brushing hair out of my face. I looked up—and froze.

Two guys stood in front of me. Both tall. Both very familiar-looking. In fact, they looked so much like Matt, I half-wondered if I’d hit my head harder than I thought.

“Am I hallucinating?” I muttered.

One of them bent down, offering a hand. “Are you okay?”

I must’ve had a ridiculous expression on my face, because he glanced back at his twin—triplet, I assumed—and raised a brow like he wasn’t sure what he’d just gotten himself into.

I blinked, still processing. “Wait… are you guys related to a guy named Matt?”

The one kneeling let out a low chuckle. His brother mumbled something I couldn’t catch.

“Yeah, he’s our brother,” he said, helping me up.

“Oh, okay.” I dusted myself off. “I just talked to him at a restaurant. Can you tell him Mhia says hi?”

It came out so fast I barely understood myself. They both looked at me like I’d started speaking in tongues.

“Uh, sure,” the guy said, half-shrugging. He glanced at his brother again, and they shared a silent look—part confusion, part amusement.

“Well… have a great day,” the standing one said, already turning to walk away.

I didn’t even have time to reply before they disappeared down the hall.

I finally reached my room and collapsed onto the bed, phone already plugged in and charging like it owed me.

Now all I could do was wait.

I really, really hope he texts.

A/N- omg I'm finally done with the first chapter and I think this is decent! Tagging all my fav blogs cuz free will exists: @bernardsbendystraws @theyluvivi @sturniolohohoho @sturns-mermaid @tits4matt @chrisspussygang @riowritesitall @scorpio1205 @sweeethrt @stvrniolostan @dolliraez @ariieeesworld @oopsiedaisydeer @delilahsturniolo @starrii-sturns @chrismalfoy @owensbabygirl @sweetoothgirl @y3sterdaysproblem @phone4pills @ifwdominicfike

[dearmini]

tw: war, current events, fear, death, violence

i haven’t talked about this before on here and i’ve kept quiet for a while, mostly because i didn’t know what to say or how to say it, but it’s been sitting heavy on my chest, and at this point i don’t think i can stay silent anymore.

i'm indian. i live in india. i’ve never said that out loud here because i wanted my blog to feel like a little pocket of calm, a space away from the world, but it’s becoming impossible to separate the two. because everything that’s happening right now.. every headline, every whisper, every update; is terrifying. the situation with pakistan and india right now… i don’t even have the right words. it feels like a nightmare. it feels like watching history get ready to repeat itself in the worst ways possible.

i’m scared. i’m so, so scared.

this isn’t politics anymore. this isn’t about lines on a map or ancient grudges. this is about people. human lives. people like you and me, people with families and dreams and soft voices and warm hands, people who just want to live. people who deserve to live. this is about the kid who doesn’t know what’s happening but clutches his mother’s dupatta a little tighter. it’s about the father who’s just trying to make it home for dinner. it’s about the students who don’t know if tomorrow is promised, and it’s about the generations that have already seen too much of this.

and i hate that we’re even here again. i hate that humanity is the last thing anyone in power seems to be considering. i hate how easy it is for leaders to speak of war, to feed people rage and call it patriotism, to play with lives like they’re not real, like they don’t matter. i hate it. i hate the government. i hate the games they play with us. the lies they tell. the way they erase empathy and replace it with blind nationalism.

i keep seeing people online talk about this like it’s something exciting, or like it’s just a meme, or a competition. some of you are cheering for a war like it’s a damn football match. like it’s entertainment. “who would win?” “bring it on.” “let’s go.” you want this to happen? you want lives to be lost? you think this is a fucking game? it’s not. it’s blood. it’s bodies. it’s families ripped apart. it’s trauma that never really heals. it’s lives that will never be lived. stop acting like this is some kind of flex. it’s not brave to want war. it’s not strong. it’s inhuman.

it’s horrifying. and honestly, it makes me feel sick.

you don’t wish for war. you don’t celebrate tension like it’s a countdown to some grand spectacle. and no, this isn’t like israel and palestine. please stop comparing the two. the genocide in palestine is not the same thing as two nuclear nations tossing threats back and forth. stop minimizing what’s happening there. stop acting like every conflict is interchangeable. it’s not. both are tragic. both involve innocent lives. but they are not the same.

and i see people choosing sides, too. “india this.” “pakistan that.” “i hope they win.” win what? what do you think is going to come out of this? nobody wins. people die. that’s it. there is no scoreboard when the outcome is war. we all lose.

and then there are people who don’t want it—who are scared like i am—but even they’re being drowned out by the noise. we’re watching the internet treat this like a storyline while some of us are here just trying to breathe, trying to sleep, trying to stop the shaking in our chest.

i don’t care what side of a border you’re on. if you’re human, then act like it. this is not a moment for pride or hate or comparisons or discourse olympics. this is about empathy. it always has been.

and if you are not well-educated with the history or backstory, i'd suggest you to not take sides. this is not about opinions. it's about humanity.

please. i’m begging. be better. speak with compassion. stop turning pain into spectacle. war is not the moment you become brave. peace is. and i just needed to say that.

the worst part? the dirtiest part? none of the people in power—the ones starting this, fueling this, feeding it like it’s strategy—none of them are going to die.

not a single one of the politicians tweeting threats from their big desks, signing off on operations, sitting in their bulletproof rooms with armed guards and unlimited access to evacuation plans—they’re not the ones whose homes will be bombed. whose schools will shut down. whose kids will grow up terrified of a sky that's too quiet. they’re not the ones with blood on their hands, but they’ll never touch the battlefield either.

it’s always the innocent people. the civilians. the ones just trying to go to work, come home, eat dinner, exist. who work for minimum wage so that their families can survive another week. the ones who didn't ask for this. didn’t vote for war. didn’t even get to say no. they’re the ones who’ll bleed. who’ll run. who’ll lose everything.

and they know that. these governments know exactly who’s going to suffer. and they still do it. they still send missiles over borders like texts. they still make statements instead of peace. and then go right back to their banquets and briefings like it’s a job well done.

it’s disgusting how normal it is for power to be this far removed from humanity. how easy it is to sign off death from a distance and call it strength. how politics in this region, in so many parts of the world, is just performance until bodies drop. and even then—they’ll say it was necessary. they’ll call it sacrifice. they’ll spin it into nationalism.

but what they won’t do is die for the things they start. they never will.

and i know i’m just one person on tumblr. i know a lot of you come here for fluff and softness and fics and love, and i promise that’ll always be here. but today i needed to say this. i needed to be real. because i am so fucking scared, and i don’t want to pretend like everything is okay. i don’t want war. i don’t want anyone to die. not here. not there. not anywhere.

this whole thing really has me fucked up internally. like… i genuinely can’t eat or sleep properly. it’s so loud online and so tense in real life, and every time i open my phone it’s like another punch to the gut. i’m praying for everybody. for the people here, for the people across the border, for the kids, the families, the ones with nothing to do with this mess who are still going to pay the price for it. i hate that anyone even has to live in fear like this. it’s not fair. it’s not right.

please. please stay safe. please look out for your people. please don’t let anger turn you into someone heartless. please don’t treat this like a game. war isn’t winning. war is loss. it’s only ever loss.

i love you. all of you. even if you don’t know me. i really hope we all come out of this alive. and more human than before.

please. be kind. be aware. speak up if you can. stay safe. remember, again, we’re all human. that’s the only thing that should matter right now.

i’m with peace. i’m with life. i’m with love. always.

[staravyz]

︖﹖ㅤㅤ Counting Stars and Stats

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ❕️ㅤclick 4rules—4masterlist

ㅤㅤ🔭ㅤㅤ—ㅤ(dr. stone) ishigami senkuu x reader

ㅤ﹑tags ... x reader/comfort/slice of life/fluff/short one shot/modern au

ㅤ౨ৎㅤ—ㅤa/n﹕cross posted tis on ao3 lmk if i suould write a part 2 😼

ㅤOn the day the guy from your AP art class that you'd been eyeing for several weeks finally asked you out to the dance, you sprinted to Senku's house to tell him.

ㅤKnowing each other for years now, it was just natural that he was the first person you'd alert.

ㅤNot even your nice friends that complain about schoolwork and convince you to go out with them once a week instead of studying, or your classmates that you only speak to in class when there's nothing to do who ask you for answers and notes during breaks, but Senku.

ㅤThe guy who's most likely to either solve climate change or become a dictator and involve you in his madness either way.

ㅤYou don't know when exactly it hit you that you wanted to start doing less advanced schoolwork and more socializing, but you did know that Senku wasn't interested in it. He was always trying to drag you away from your friends to pull you back in the lab, putting you through Olympic sports level studying over college courses you weren't even planning to take, and running statistics on socialization to prove to you how useless it is compared to science.

ㅤSure, it was probably sweet in Senku's weird way of showing his care, but this time, you got asked out.

ㅤTo a school dance.

ㅤThis is revolutionary for you.

ㅤ"Hate to break it to you, but you're gonna have to cancel your little dance date thing," Senku interrupted, right when you were describing how the guy smoothly asked you after class.

ㅤ"What?" You blinked. "Why?"

ㅤ"I need your help setting up the telescope so we can compare Saturn's moons' orbits over the course of the night. Visibilty rate is the best on the night of the dance before the weather decides to start coating everything in snow," he said casually. Senku hadn't spared so much so a glance since you started talking.

ㅤWith him in his chair, scribbling down notes—probably memorizing each of Saturn's moons—you sat on his bed, fidgeting with a rubix cube in your lap.

ㅤ"Who's we? I'm going to the dance, Senku. You can collect your data by yourself because I'm not skipping out on this just for you." You rolled your eyes. "Ask Taiju, maybe."

ㅤ"Taiju's going with Yuzuriha, and I'd rather disturb your night over theirs because they have a more solid relationship than you and your little art buddy do."

ㅤYou huffed. Arguing over whose date should be prioritized more was useless.

ㅤ"Then you're on your own, Senku. I want to go. I got asked," You stated.

ㅤSenku sighed and put down his pencil. "You're gonna regret it, ten billion percent." He turned to face you, but didn't exactly meet your eyes. "Gen told me that guy is an entrepreneur in asking girls out over bets for money."

ㅤYou frowned. "Are you saying I'm more likely to be a bet than a real date?" Your hands fell slack in your lap.

ㅤ"I'm saying that you need to think more logically about the people around you." He gestured towards the space around you with his hand then stood up and flicked your forehead. "Use that supposed brain of yours to make better decisions, idiot."

ㅤYou rubbed your forehead, it didn't hurt at all. "Yeah, yeah, whatever, you're not a licensed therapist and I don't feel comfortable taking life advice from someone who watches petri dishes for entertainment."

ㅤSenku turned back around, a smirk peeking at the corner of lips. He scoffed. "Alright, see through the consequences of your actions. Not my problem."

—

ㅤOh how you loathe how right Senku is every time.

ㅤSitting in one of those cheap, black chairs the dance committee laid out at a table only you were at, your date was over an hour late and it was just now starting to sink in.

ㅤYou got stood up.

ㅤThis is unbelievable.

ㅤWith a sigh, you stopped your relentless tapping on the table and placed your chin in your hand as you watched everyone with sonder.

ㅤYour friends were occupied with their own dates. Taking pictures, dancing, sneaking off to make out in a bathroom stall, things you've never really pictured yourself doing but sometimes wished you could. More or less because you craved the real experience and making memories and not because you wanted a pair of lips trailing bacteria and saliva down your neck.

ㅤYeah, maybe you could cross that one off as unnecessary.

ㅤYou checked the time on your phone. 10:38 PM. Might as well go for a walk and rethink everything about your life, then come back with a new identity.

ㅤOne step outside and you had already made another regret: not bringing a thicker jacket.

ㅤHumiliation was stronger than your need for warmth, so you walked down the steps and strode into the night.

ㅤNo particular destination, just listening to the sound of the cool breeze, clacking of your accessories, and your shoes hitting the pavement with each step. A car or two would drive by and you'd wonder if they thought you were a loner, or maybe a runaway.

ㅤPassing a lampost, you grazed your fingers over the pole and observed the light and shadows sharply reacting to your bone structure. Your gaze softened at such a simple sight. Maybe if things had gone well, that hand would be warmer, held by the art guy who apparently profited over your emotional expense.

ㅤ"I can't help but respect the hustle. I would've done it for the yen, too," you softly whispered to yourself. You took a few more steps then collapsed on the bench next to the post, shivering at the cold.

ㅤYou sighed as you tilted your head up towards the moon, your breath coming out as white wisps. For a moment, you only counted the stars you could see.

ㅤThen warm tears began to trace your cheeks.

ㅤIf you weren't freezing cold, you would have lifted a hand or two to wipe them away. But it's okay. There's nobody around. You walked far enough to guarantee that. It's pretty stupid to be crying over something so trivial. You've shed a few tears over exams, failed experiments, teacher comments, normal things that you deemed worthy crying over because they were failures—important things that slipped past your logical thinking.

ㅤThis wasn't like that. This wasn't a test below 80% or a shattered beaker, this was your emotions. A consequence you couldn't have foreseen like you could with a grammatical error. All you did was say yes. All you wanted was a date.

ㅤYou closed your eyes, taking shaky breaths.

ㅤ"Moon, why does nothing ever go right for me?" You asked quietly, as if a round rock in earth's orbit could offer you comfort.

ㅤYou tilted your head back down and wiped the tears onto your sleeves.

ㅤ"... What the hell are you doing here?"

ㅤ"WHAT the FUCK, Senku—" you flinched and snapped your head towards the voice, recognizing him immediately. "—where did you—?"

ㅤ"Answer my question first," he deadpanned. Senku was wearing a much better coat than you were. Regular pajama pants, too, and bedhead hair.

ㅤYou turned your head away, still attempting to fix your whole crying situation. "I'm on a walk. Th—the school gym was crowded."

ㅤ"Uh huh." Reluctancy to tell the truth detected. Senku settled on analyzing you and piecing together what actually happened instead—not like it'd be hard, he saw this coming a week ago.

ㅤHe gave a dramatic sigh. "Move over."

ㅤHesitantly, you made room for him on the bench. He sat a little too close. No, that's probably you.

ㅤ"Art freak ditched you?"

ㅤSilence.

ㅤ"I'll take that as a yes. All your critical thinking deficient friends too busy to accompany you?"

ㅤSilence.

ㅤ"Damn, rough night."

ㅤ"Don't say it," you muttered, lowering your head a bit more.

ㅤHe smirked. "Say what?" He teased, leaning closer to you for more effect. "I told you—"

ㅤ"Senku," you stopped him, voice coming out with less confidence and stability than you intended. You sniffled.

ㅤSenku leaned back on the bench and stared straight ahead for a moment of silence. Uncomfortable silence, significantly on his part.

ㅤWere you crying? He could've deducted that from the sight of you moping on the bench earlier when he started walking here, but he sincerely hoped you weren't because he wouldn't know how to deal with that—how to make you feel better.

ㅤHe'd seen you cry before... from afar... with someone else handling it. After all these years, he still didn't wouldn't know what to do exactly.

ㅤOne time, you cried over a failed math test because your friends wanted to take you somewhere fun the night before. They said you worked too hard and that it was important for you to relax every now and then. Senku disagreed with their beliefs, always encouraged you to study more. When you started crying, he thought only about how he was right. When your friends started frantically apologizing, comforting you until you started smiling and laughing again, he wondered if he was wrong.

ㅤLogically, no, not at all.

ㅤEmotionally?

ㅤSenku never bothered with your questionable taste in the people you surround yourself with until then. He realized he forgot to factor in your emotional need for connection, experience, and comfort, and that's why you stuck around those gossipy idiots, half of whom are failing in at least two subjects.

ㅤSenku clicked his tongue and spoke up. "Look, you got stood up by some kid who'll probably be a deadbeat when he grows up, who cares? You'll live. You should be more above this, genius."

ㅤYou shifted slightly. "That's not helpful."

ㅤHe shrugged. "Tch, this isn't my sort of thing to do so have some empathy."

ㅤHe glanced at you and heard a soft chuckle. He smiled. Laughter, good. Clear sign of positive improvement in emotional recovery.

ㅤ"Then why are you trying?" You snickered, leaning back on the bench and tilting your head towards him. The thought of Senku Ishigami, comforting you, was impossible in the way that it was hilarious.

ㅤSenku looked away, trying not to catch your contagious laugh. "Because you were crying."

ㅤSilence.

ㅤHe leaned back and crossed his arms. You only watched, absorbing that singular sentence. Such a simple reason, yet it meant way too much than it should have coming from Senku.

ㅤHe stared at the street, you stared at him.

ㅤ"Shouldn't you be watching Saturn's moons right now?" You blurted.

ㅤSenku looked at you. Was that it? It was that easy to make you feel better? Noted.

ㅤ"Didn't feel like graphing things myself all night." He shrugged, stretching his legs out. "Went on a walk instead and saw your lonely ass moping on a bench."

ㅤ"Besides," he continued, looking up at the night sky. "this is nice, too. Y'know I'm not only into astronomy because of the scientific details and data, right? I mean, c'mon, any person would be curious of this too." Senku gestured at the sky.

ㅤYou followed his gaze. A small smile spread on your lips, the moon offered you comfort after all.

ㅤSenku went on to list 88 more facts about space with words that had too many syllables to count. You were half listening, half wondering why scientific terms always ended in '-tion'.

ㅤIn the middle of his rant, you pulled out your phone.

ㅤ"12:00 AM, happy New Year, Senku," you joked, smiling at him. "The dance is wrapping up by now. I'll just tell my friends I went home early or something." You sighed as you slid lower down the bench, shivering.

ㅤ"Alright, might as well wrap this disaster up too," Senku huffed, standing up with his hands in his pockets. You followed and began walking down the path to your place, Senku walked next to you.

ㅤSilence. Comfortable silence. Just listening to the sound of the cool breeze, clacking of your accessories, and you and Senku's shoes hitting the pavement with each step.

ㅤYou passed by a 24/7 convenience store, glancing up momentarily at the bright light. Senku followed your gaze and stopped walking.

ㅤ"Want something?" He nodded towards the store. You shook your head. He sighed. "Alright, one second."

ㅤSenku took your arm and dragged you into the convenience store.

ㅤYou yelped. "Wh—!?"

ㅤSenku let go of you at the cashier desk, disappearing into one of the aisles. You blinked and made awkward eye contact with the worker.

ㅤYou peeked your head into the shelves. "Senku?" You called out. Senku magically reappeared next to you.

ㅤ"Get yourself a snack or whatever. I'm just looking for something."

ㅤYou shivered. "God, you're like a ghost," you murmured.

ㅤPhone in hand, packet of pastillas in the other. You waited for Senku at the front. He returned with what looked like one of those ice packet things the elementary school office used to hand out to those injury prone kids for bruises and stuff. You decided not to question it. Senku snatched the pastillas from your hand and handed it to the cashier. Before you could pull out your wallet, he had already paid.

ㅤYou narrowed your eyes at him and slowly put your wallet back.

ㅤOn your way out, he pressed something on the ice packet then handed it to you. It was warm.

ㅤ"Ohh, it's a heat pad," you said. Senku nodded.

ㅤ"You looked like you were about to get a secret fourth degree level of frostbite back there."

ㅤYou glared at him but laughed anyway and thanked him, feeling significantly rejuvenated by the warmth. Senku opened your snack.

ㅤ"What are these?" he held one piece up as you two walked side by side. You took one for yourself and popped it in your mouth.

ㅤ"Pastillas," you said, chewing. "They're good, try one."

ㅤSenku ate one and made a face.

ㅤYou snickered at his reaction. "What? Don't like it?"

ㅤHe held the packet up and squinted at the ingredients. "Does this thing have, like, 15 pounds of sugar per serving? Holy." You laughed. "You're going to get one cavity per bite. Never letting you pick snacks again."

ㅤ"I'm sorry, I didn't know you wanted to share in the first place. And if you hate it so much, why are you eating more?" You glared, taking the packet back before Senku could toss another piece in his mouth.

ㅤ"I was stating facts, not my true opinion," he countered. "Your taste in convenience store snacks are nutritiously inefficient, but admittedly, not bad." Senku made a hand gesture as he spoke.

ㅤThe rest of the walk to your house was—for one, warmer, and a lot nicer than what you expected with that AP art classmate.

ㅤIn retrospect, you didn't know why you said yes in the first place. It wasn't like you two were super close. It was clearly a one-sided crush. Senku called him a distraction. You knew that. And yet, caught up in the moment of when he asked you after class, you said yes.

ㅤYou made impulsive decisions sometimes. It's a good thing Senku knows how to knock sense into you. Never is it polite nor gentle, but he does it without being prompted, and is always conveniently there for you when it ends in disaster—painfully accurate according to his prediction.

ㅤYou snuck a glance at him while you walked in that same, slow pace, as if you were mutually savouring the moment.

ㅤSenku, the guy who would either solve climate change or become a dictor and involve you in his madness either way, cheered you up, bought you a heat pad and a snack, and then walked you home.

ㅤAre you just now realizing this?

ㅤRealizing him?

ㅤYou faced forward once again, ignoring the heat rising to your cheeks.

ㅤFuck. This is going to be your worst distraction yet.

ㅤ"We're here." Senku's voice snapped you out of the clouds. Your eyes darted from his to your home. You muttered a small "Oh" and started walking towards your door.

ㅤYour hand lingered on the door knob. You could already hear Senku's footsteps fading into the quiet of the night.

ㅤThat's a bit unfair of you, isn't it?

ㅤ"Senku," you called out.

ㅤHe turned around with that unfathomable look, like walking you home was just another task on his to-do list that he was satisfied to check off and not an overly romantic gesture you didn't know he was even capable of.

ㅤ"Thank you." You smiled.

ㅤYou caught a glimpse of his smirk before he turned away.

ㅤ"Don't go accepting any more dates with ridiculous guys without consulting me first," he retorted.

ㅤWith a sigh, you entered your house, kicked your shoes off your aching feet (you walked a farther distance than you thought), and collapsed on your bed, fully content with sleeping in your current attire.

ㅤYou threw the empty packet of pastillas in your trash and left the heat pad on your desk.

ㅤYour phone buzzed in your jacket. You hummed, contemplating whether or not you should fall asleep now or answer that.

ㅤOpening your phone, you squinted at the brightness, scrambling to turn it down. You opened the notification. A text from your friend group.

[name]whre are u??????

did thwy get kidnepaped holy shit guys

vroo i told u their date was sketchy asf like

ㅤYou chuckled at their texts and typed out a reply.

i'm fine lol

i went for a walk and ran into senku.

SO U DID GET KIDNEPAPD😥

no, hs walked me home

wair werent you supposed to be with that guy feom yiur art class?

he stood me up, not a big deal.

senku filled in.

ㅤToo tired to elaborate, you dropped your phone on the bed next to you and began to count stars until you fell asleep.

©️ staravyzㅤ(¬_¬") do not steal, translate, or repost.

[hailturinturambar]

There's something terribly perverse about fan culture. As if people become so obsessed with something that they abandon their principles for it. If such people ever had principles, I would say.

This should be a nice, comfortable place where people talk and debate about things they like. Honestly, you all are becoming more and more like the men who hate TROP and call for "justice for Tolkien."

We have to call a spade a spade, as they say. You are toxic, and above all, cruel. Your ship only exists in fiction, in fact, it doesn't even exist in fiction. But the people you are attacking are real and have real feelings.

Oh, what I wouldn't give to meet you in person, I'd like to see all of you who attack people anonymously by saying things like that to their faces. You wouldn't do it, because this toxic culture only has strength on the internet, in person you are all cowards.

Don't you dare say "but I know so many blah blahs who aren't like that. I don't care about those who aren't like that, I'm talking to those who ARE LIKE THAT.

Tolkien, the writers, the actors, heavens, they would be ashamed of you. Everyone in the cast is united, and you guys keep fighting. Do you think they care about fights? They wouldn't support you, not at all. Tolkien is about love, friendship and hope, and those of you who bought into reading the book (if you read it at all) got it completely wrong.

[channieskies]

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐗𝐈𝐈: 𝐖𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐝

Pairing: Prince Hyunjin x Reader (AFAB) Summary: Hyunjin learns to never take his eyes off of his opponent. Word Count: 6,000+ [Reading Time: 25 Mins] Genre: Historical, Fantasy, Strangers to Lovers, Royalty, Angst, Smut (Eventual), NSFW tags are below. AU: Prince, Royal, Supernatural NETS: @neverendingdreams-net & @mirohs-aurora-society Synopsis: The kingdom of Volantis is in disarray; the monarch rules with an iron fist. The times of hope, harmony, and kindness were buried with the queen who passed many years ago. The people are praying for a savior, but who will be their light at the end of this dark tunnel? Authors Note: Please reblog or leave a comment to let me know how you feel. I'd love a little feedback. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it. As per usual, this hasn't been proofread. Special thanks to @therhythmafterthesummer for helping with with this chapter and @saradika-graphics for some of the dividers. Disclaimer: This story does not reflect the real lives or personalities of Stray Kids. I do not know them personally. This is purely a work of fiction.

Looking for another chapter? Chapter Index: Chapter 1| Chapter 2| Chapter 3| Chapter 4| Chapter 5| Chapter 6| Chapter 7| Chapter 8| Chapter 9| Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 15 | Chapter 16

Warning: This chapter contains descriptions of sexual activities. Reader discretion is advised.

The books from the secret library at the keep felt heavy in your bag. You hadn’t told Hyunjin of your findings, even if Aeri urged that you should. You'd snuck away to find them while everyone else was getting supplies ready for the long journey ahead. Despite your healing abilities, Venia thought it would be best if you sat on the sidelines and let them handle things.

Aeri was right about the ever blooming flower and how it opened with your blood essence. What she failed to tell you was that you needed to actually shed a little of said blood to open the door. You struggled to get it open for a whole fifteen minutes before you'd figured that part out. 

Thankfully no one was around to see you flounder. Especially Minho, he'd never let you live that down. Truthfully, you hadn’t even opened the books, too afraid of what they would say. Your father’s side of the family was a little more forthcoming with information about your lineage, while big chunks of the family history was still a big mystery.

While your mother’s side was shrouded in secrecy. The only thing you knew for sure was that they originated in the Jade mountain pass. Other than that, you knew about as much about them as the next commoner, absolutely nothing.

You needed to know why your brother didn’t heal on the battlefield, why the very thing that saved your life didn’t save his. Just like you needed to know why you healed the way you did and if you were capable of anything else.

Hyunjin needed to know why he had the dreams and visions that he was having and how they were connected with this epic the three of you were on. You all needed to know how he could control his powers to better aid you in this journey, for all of your sakes.

You’d been traveling a full week since his last vision, and you were now bordering the Passageway of Diamonds, the easternmost point that led into the Jade mountains. Within a week, maybe a week and a half or so, you should be in the little town Minho grew up in. You were all so close to the finish line you could almost taste it. But that also meant you were close to where him and his mother were held captive and that scared you.

The three of you had become content with being together. You’d let him in on the secret language that Minho spoke and even in on the little jokes the two of you made. But, Hyunjin had a lot to learn, both you and surprisingly, Minho were willing to teach him.

When you’d  settle down for the evening, classes would begin. Swordsmanship, horseback riding, archery, hand to hand, and even basic things to help keep him alive, like cooking or foraging. 

You learned the hard way that he couldn’t survive off the land when he brought back poisonous berries because they looked pretty. Hand to hand was your forte, Minho was the swordsman. While you would most definitely hold your own, you’d even won a competition or two, while in disguise, a few times.

But it wasn’t what you were best at. No, hand to hand was your thing. You preferred to do damage with your own two hands if possible. The three of you were camped out on the outskirts of Guiwei, the southernmost town outside of the passageway that led to the Jade Mountain pass. 

“You need to always keep your eye on your opponent.” You spoke, as you assed Hyunjin, marking down all the weaknesses you spotted. “Their weakness can be your triumph, your weakness can be your downfall.” Your eyes met his as the flames of the fire danced inside of them. He was eager to learn, just as much as you and Minho were to teach him.

You needed him to learn, so that he could flourish on the throne and not wither away. You’d noticed over the last few weeks that Hyunjin was nothing like the royalty or nobles you’d met in your life. Maybe with the exception of the prince from Perth, Christopher, most of them were pretentious little puppets who could strategize their way out of a low hedge maze. You wanted better for your kingdom, you wanted better for the man you were growing to call your friend, Hyunjin. 

You’d read about what a king was supposed to be and his father was far from it. He was cruel to his subjects, he didn’t care about the blood of the men, women, or children that was shed for his stupid war. He had no concern about the people in his own castle city that were dying from the illnesses that plagued them or the fact that most of them went hungry everyday while he threw feasts in his name. He wanted monuments built of him, for people to fall at his feet and worship him as if he was a god. 

You needed better from the next king. One that was kind and understanding of the plights his subjects went through. You were so deep in thought over what the kingdom needed and how you hoped you and Minho could help mold the future king that you didn’t even notice Hyunjin taking your distraction as an opportunity until it was far too late. He swept your legs with his long ones, causing you to land on your back in the mud beneath you with a thud. The move knocked the wind out of you, making Hyunjin panic.

“Oh no- I’m so, so, sorry.” He reached down to help you up, but in the spirit of pure pettiness, you take his hand and pull him down with you. Taken completely off guard, he falls forward, face coming dangerously close to your own. Your eyes shut tight, waiting for the impact, but it never came. Hyunjin hovered over you, his breath lightly dancing over your features.

He had you caged beneath him, successfully catching himself before crashing his face into yours. Blush immediately painted his cheeks when you looked up at him. “Never take your eyes off of your opponent.” He looked away, clearing his throat. “I’ll keep that in mind.” You broke eye contact first, feeling a strange heat creep up your neck and moving fairly quickly to your face. 

“Okay, you can get off me now.” He lingered, eyes desperately searching your face, waiting for you to connect with him again. But you kept your head turned. You couldn't understand the feelings that were swirling around in you with part of his body partially pressed to your own.

He moved away, sitting back on his knees. “Don’t get distracted.” You cleared your throat, wondering why it sounded shaky. Could it have been the fall? “Battle doesn’t stop because you fall. It's an ongoing assault until you or your opponent claims victory.” He nodded in understanding, but made no moves to get up from his position.

“Let’s call it a night.” You stood, dusting off your dirt slicked pants and shirt. Finally the prince stood to his feet, but surprisingly, he didn’t attempt to make his appearance more clean. You suppose he’d just been hanging out with Minho, he’d picked up the habit from soldiers who frequented the battle fields during the war.

“Min has probably started cooking, since I can smell the fire going. You should probably join him.” There was this strange awkwardness growing between the two of you and instead of facing it, you decided to run off. You need to clear your head and get some of this dirt off your body. 

Guiwei was a beautiful town. The architecture of it was ancient with the town being older than the kingdom itself. This used to be the hub of trade for the people who lived in the Jade mountains and the people from the southern isles, or at least that is what your grandmother told you. A bustling little town with plenty to offer.

Jade from the mountain caves, jewels and fish from the southern isles, spices from the east, meat from the borderlands, anything you needed could be found in Guiwei. Any magic ailments could be healed, any potion concocted. You could feel the remnants of magic in the stone of the buildings when you passed through the town. It buzzed with a current you couldn’t explain even if someone asked you to.

Even way out here in the outskirts, you could feel it in the trees, magic seemed to brush over your skin as it mingled with the wind. You’d never felt so in touch with yourself. You even understood why they named this Shimmering pond. As the sun started to set, the magic truly started to show. There were three or four waterfalls that flowed into this waterway.

The sound of the roaring waterfalls falling into the pond could be a remedy for any type of stress. The way that the sun hit while it set made it look like diamonds, lapis lazuli, rubies, and jade were beneath the surface. The water sparkled, painting the tall cliffs surrounding it in a beautiful kaleidoscope of colors. The landscape was painted with this pinkish-purple hue that reminded you of the otherworld, Elysium.

You undressed, not bothering to tidy up the clothes you were going to wash anyway. You carefully set the fresh set off to the side so they wouldn’t get wet. You waded into the water, the coolness of it was a refreshing change to the hot stickiness you’d grown used to. When you got to where your feet no longer touched the pond floor, you dove, wanting to get your whole body clean while you were out here.

These waters felt more than just a little cleansing. It was almost like they were cleaning you down to your soul, making you a conduit for the magic in the air. You could live in this space, maybe after getting the prince to the kingdom, you’d consider it. It wasn’t customary for a daughter to leave her parents, especially if she wasn’t married. But you were sure that neither was being an escort to the prince. You could see yourself settling down in a place like this.

He stood there, looking longingly at your back as you retreated. Though things were getting better between the two- well, the three of you, he still wanted more. Even if he didn’t know exactly what that ‘more’ entailed. Downtrodden, he headed back to the camp to see if Minho needed any help.

His shoulders were slumped, an immovable frown etched on his face. The loud thump of Minho chopping into his freshly caught deer, brought Hyunjin back to the present. He could ask for advice, but Minho saw you as a sister and there was no way he wouldn’t see past a hypothetical ‘If there is a girl I like, how do I approach her?’ situation. This was just something he’d have to deal with on his own. 

He stood a few feet away from his friend, stomach turning at the sight of the raw, red flesh he was handling not so gently. He couldn’t understand how Minho had the stomach for it. Even with you telling him all he needed to know about both you and Minho’s upbringing, that didn’t make hunting any easier to stomach.

“N-need some help?” Hyunjin’s brows knit together, disgust evident on his face. The other man glanced up at him, stopping his actions to appraise him for a moment. Minho shook his head, then nodded towards the pond, telling him to get washed up. He didn’t have to tell Hyunjin twice, he was hoping, repeating ‘Do not say yes. Please, don’t say yes.’ over and over in his head, in hopes the Volantian gods would take pity on him and grant him this one simple wish.

He all but ran to get away from the gruesome sight before him. He didn’t bother gathering fresh clothes to use after bathing, he’d just cover himself and walk the short distance back to camp. That's how he and Minho had been doing things, he knew you had to go about it a different way, since you were a girl, even if he didn’t know exactly what your bathing routine was. Was he curious? What man of his age wouldn’t be curious about the person they like in every way?

He wanted to know your thoughts, even the things you found mundane. He wanted you to tell him how you were feeling even when you tried to hide things behind polite smiles. He wanted to hold you in his arms while you fell asleep, since it seemed you struggled to do that on your own. He wanted to be your comfort, your joy, the one you turned to when things were rough and you needed to vent- 

All his thoughts ceased as he waded into the water, the tall grass around the pond initially shielded his view from anything beyond it. The sight before his eyes settled into his bones, shook him to the core. He knew it was wrong to stare, but at the same time, how was he to take his eyes off of the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen? You were more beautiful than the most beautiful painting in the world, but even then, there was no medium to which your beauty could be captured. 

The moon casts its beautiful radiance down on you and the water surrounding you, painting your skin with the soft pale glow of it. The water sparkled like the finest jewels adding to the gleam on your gorgeous skin. Your shoulders were dotted with moistness, your head tilted back, showing off the mesmerizing curve of your neck. Time stopped along with his breathing and movements. His brain stuttered to a halt as well.

He was stuck standing there, staring. You could feel eyes on you, but for some strange reason that didn’t cause any alarm. You slowly turned to the shore, making eye contact with the bewildered prince, a soft smile gracing your lips. This felt like a dream of his. Was this a dream of his? He snapped out of his daze to pinch himself, cursing his actions after the pain rushed to the spot he tweaked. You chuckled at his face of discomfort. “It’s fine, Hyunjin. You can come closer if you’d like. I don’t mind.” 

It had slipped his mind that you’d grown up with a boy around your age in the house. Has Minho seen you naked? His eyes widened at the thought, but relaxed almost immediately upon remembering, he was raised as your brother. Everything between the two of you was purply platonic. He trudged forward, moving closer to where you stood in the water. 

His heart beat fast with every step he took, he feared you’d be able to hear it. He certainly hated the fact that he could. He stopped a few feet away, just out of arm's reach. Afraid that if he got any closer he’d be tempted to do the things that were playing behind his eyelids every time he blinked. Indecent things that normal people wouldn’t want to do with their friends.

“See, I won’t bite.” You finished your words with another heart wrenching smile and he gulped, because something in him almost wished you would bite him. “It's beautiful isn’t it? It's almost like it’s enchanted.” You looked out at the waterfalls, but he couldn’t take his eyes off of you.

He nodded, forgetting briefly that he needed to respond verbally. “Ah- yes. More beautiful than you can imagine.” You looked back at him and he looked away, gazing at the glimmering crescent in the sky. He didn’t have to look to know you were smiling again, he could feel the presence of that effervescent look on your face. Could it be that you were happy because of him? Because of his presence here in this space with you? Just the thought filled his heart with joy.

“Hyunjin…” You turned your body towards him and he was thanking whatever higher being out there that there was steam coming off the water, hiding whatever glorious sight was underneath. He didn’t think his poor little heart could take it. “Do…” You paused, making him grow worried about what was on your mind. “Do you know.. Anything about your mother’s side of the family?” You chewed on your lip as you waited for him to answer. 

He sighed. He had tried to pry as much as he could about his mother’s side of the family. Looked for books on her people in both the castle library and well as the keeps, but he never found a thing. “Not really. I knew she was high born, from the Jade mountains. Venia let it slip that she had a sister, but that is all I know. Why do you ask?” It wouldn’t have surprised him if the outside world knew more of his mother than he did, that was by design, courtesy of his father. The king felt Hyunjin didn’t have the right to know about the woman he supposedly killed.

“Well, what if I tell you that I visited with your mother when I was knocked out.” His eyes bulged. Was she that delirious that she was seeing the dead? She put a hand up to stop him from jumping to conclusions. “You and I aren’t so different.” She spoke with a sureness to her tone.

“Our mothers are both from the Jade Mountains, well at least my mother’s family is. There is a limbo that people from there go to when they die. I was summoned there by Aeri. She wanted me to tell you that she’s watching over you and that she loves you very much and wishes that things wouldn’t have gone the way they did, so that she could be in your life.” 

Something deep down in Hyunjin always made him think that his mother hated him. His father had told him as much over the years. He always felt that maybe his words were true, that his mother might have held a grudge against him, that's why he had faced so many hardships in life. Venia tried to tell him that his father's words were untrue and that his mother loved him more than life itself, which is why she so willingly left this plane of existence so that he could live.

But he could never understand how or why she abandoned him, leaving him with his tyrant of a father. “You dream.. Often, don’t you? Not about things that you should be dreaming about. I mean, you see things… like the future or what could be the future.” He couldn’t look at you. How could you have possibly known about his dreams? Did you really meet his mother? Were his dreams because of her?

“I will answer your question, but first I want you to answer mine..” You nodded for him to go on. “D-did you really meet my mother? Wh-what was she like?” He could feel himself shaking. It wasn’t from the cool breeze that was carried to them by the waterfalls or the contrast of the warm water that they stood in.

No, he was overwhelmed by the thought that you of all people might have had the chance to do something he hadn’t even had the pleasure of doing, meeting his mother. It seemed that no matter how hard he wished, or how many dreams he had, he could never see her. Despite how hard he yearned to.

You did something unexpected. You reached out and caressed his cheek, “You have her eyes, Hyunjin. You are sweet and kind just like her. She was beautiful and she just had this aura about her that made me feel safe and taken care of, like I could trust her with all of my problems.”

Your brows knit together as you looked upon the sad look in his eyes. “By no means does this mean, hurry up and die, but I can’t wait for you to meet her. I know you’d love her just as much as she loves you.” Your hand was lingering on his face and despite him trying his best not to hold it there, he lost the battle. His hand covered the one on his cheeks, taking you by surprise.

“Conspiring to take the prince’s life is a punishable offense.” He spoke in jest. “I’m both happy and sad that you got to meet her. Sad that you had to go through all of that just to get to me. I have no doubt that our travels ahead will be… tumultuous to say the least, but I’m happy that it’s you…… and Minho at my side on this journey. I’m also happy that it was you who got to experience what my mother is like. I undoubtedly would have taken it for granted, with the grudge I hold towards her in my heart. You went in with an unbiased heart and came out of it with an enlightened spirit. Thank you, for wanting to share the moments you had with her, with me.”

Hyunjin was usually at a loss for words when it came to you. For the words to flow so easily from his mouth, it shocked both you and him. He sounded so mature and wise. Understanding his shortcomings but not trying to overcompensate for them, instead apologizing for them.

It was the way you were looking up at him, it was pulling his heartstrings. He mourned for what he’d lost for years, even if whom he mourned for was someone he’d never had the chance to meet. So a missed opportunity wasn’t something he thought too much about. In fact, he was happier it was you and not him, genuinely. Your hand was still pressed to his cheek under his own, bodies so close to one another in this warm pond that surrounded the both of you. 

Your eyes darting to his lips wasn’t lost on him. As a matter of fact, he was holding back, trying his best not to press a kiss to your tempting lips. Hyunjin wanted to be a gentleman for you. He’d seen all too well what men could be like. His father was a rough man, and he wanted to be nothing like him. But when your eyes darted to his lips again, he just couldn’t help it anymore. He needed this.

Though the moonlight gave off a beautiful glow, it was hard to see the things around you. Especially the darkness in the young man's eyes standing in front of you. “There is no need to thank-” His lips pressed to yours, shutting you up completely.

At first caught off guard, your body ridgid from the unexpected display of affection, you soon melted into him, eyes closing. He stepped closer when you made no attempts to pull away, a hand moving to your waist, but not making any other moves. 

For a first kiss it was tender but in no ways awkward. He pulled away first, eyes closed just as yours were. He rested his head against your forehead, savoring the moment the two of you just shared. He wanted more, wanted the moment to last. But he was too afraid to make any other moves.

This was his first time having any contact with a woman, he didn’t want to risk being too handsy or doing something that would make you uncomfortable, so he opted to do nothing.

He didn’t account for how you would feel or if you would take charge. Your fingers tangled into his shoulder length hair, as you pulled his lips back to yours. It was his turn to be shocked, but that shock only lasted a few seconds before he was pulling your naked body into his. Never in a million years would he have expected you to reciprocate his feelings, but it seemed like you did.

With no experience to date, he didn’t know how to move further than just a closed mouth to mouth kiss. His nerves were beginning to kick in. What if you wanted to do more than just this? He’d never so much as touched a girl before you came along and turned his world upside down. You nipped at his bottom lip and his mouth and eyes flew open. 

Were you the opposite of him? He’d read about women who were more forward than others, were you one of them? Have you done more than kiss someone before? A bout of jealousy bubbled up in his chest. If this was to persist, would you be his first and him just another conquest?

His mind was jumping from a to z and back again. “Hyunjin?” You pulled back from him, noticing how distanced his mind had become. “If you don’t want to… I understand.” There was a lump forming in your throat from the supposed rejection you were feeling. 

“I- no.” He shook his head, trying to rid himself of his thoughts, which were bringing him down. “Ha-have you do-done this before?” You looked up at him with those beautiful eyes of yours and all his worries subsided. You shook your head and all the tension in his shoulder released.

“Yes, but no. I’ve kissed before, but never like this..” Your eyes traveled down to where the water hit his body, but quickly looked away, the view was almost too much for your eyes. Hyunjin may not have been the most muscular man you’d met, but even before his training began, his body was well built.

But since you’ve been training together, you’ve noticed the changes in his body. Not that you were looking or anything. Hyunjin took the initiative, he wanted to kiss you again. It was his turn to cup your cheeks. 

He softly grabbed your face, pulling your lips to his once again. Trying his best to remember every move from every love scene in every book he’d ever read. He licked the seam of your lips and like some strange chant to open a hidden cave’s doors, your lips parted for him. Apprehensively, he slid his tongue in your mouth, tentatively rubbing his tongue against your own until he got the hang of it.

It was when you moaned into the kiss, that's when all of his sanity snapped. He needed you, like a person needs air. With a strength neither of you knew he had, he picked you up, trying his best not to break the kiss but inevitably failing. You giggled, grabbing his face and pressing sweet kisses all over it.

He carried you to a nearby rock, sitting you down on its shockingly warm surface. “I want to try so-something.” He was nervous, that much was evident. He’d read all types of books over the years, mostly they were whatever Venia brought back from her travels. 

Some he’d requested after reading something he liked from a particular author. Even with him reading a plethora of genres, he enjoyed romance the most. With that came some bed scenes, in which some books are spicier than others. He’d read things from a female perspective about what they may like.

He gravitated towards the books, hoping that if he ever got the chance to, he’d do exactly what made the women feel pleasure in the books. He pressed a kiss to your lips, letting them linger there before moving his lips over your jaw, neck, then chest. 

“I-is that okay?” He asked after swiping his tongue over your nipple before moving to the other. You nodded, eyes rolling back. You’d never felt anything quite like this before. It felt like every nerve ending was on fire. When he took a pebbled bud into his mouth, nipping at the flesh lightly, you let out a soft moan.

Your fingers intertwined into his soft, inky locks. Hyunjin couldn’t get enough of the taste of your skin. It was like a drug to him, he needed more after the first hit. He dropped to his knees, the water coming up just above his belly button as he did so. His face was right there between your legs, causing your face to immediately heat up. 

Your mother had taught you about things that could happen during your first time, but never had she mentioned the immodest act of a man kneeling between your legs like this, especially not the prince of your realm. You covered your hot cheeks with both hands as he drug his fingers down your skin. “You were right about me dreaming…” He spoke softly, the babbling waterfalls adding the perfect soundtrack to his pleasant voice. “I’ve dreamed about you countless times. You are all I’ve ever seen, for years now. Your eyes..” 

He leaned up and pressed a soft kiss to your lids, you closed them as he leaned in. “Your lips..” A chaste kiss to your parted lips was next. “You, sitting on the windowsill of your room, looking out at the sprawling land your family owns. The orchard right out front of your door…” He pressed kisses to each of your fingers.

“You have been the only thing I’ve known outside of Venia and I didn’t even know you. I just knew that somehow, someway, you were meant for me.” A kiss was then pressed to your belly button before he made his descent. 

Your body shivered. You’d never felt something so tender yet innately erotic. You could feel tingles from the places he kissed all the way to your toes and back. But nothing felt as good as his tongue tentatively exploring places only you had touched. Your head fell back as a loud moan escaped your lips.

His trembling hands pushed open the thighs you were desperately trying to lock around his head. Not that he would mind though, he was enjoying the sounds that slipped past those beautiful lips of yours. He took pride in the fact that he was the one pulling them from you. 

All of that reading he’d done was paying off. His tongue dipped into your hole, searching for more of the sweet nectar he had by chance gotten a taste of. He was like a man starved when his thirst was quenched. Diving his tongue even deeper, the tip of his nose constantly brushing against the sensitive bundle of nerves that was your clit.

You tugged at his hair, making him groan against you. He was on edge, itching to touch himself, to relieve the tension he felt. But his mind was too preoccupied with trying to figure out if he was doing this right. 

You pressed him further into you, needing more. Teetering on the edge of something you’d never felt before. Granted, you had touched yourself before. Everyone had urges. But your fingers had never felt this good. So good that you felt like you could shed your skin and become a new woman from this experience.

When he sucked your clit back into his mouth, svelte fingers, prodding at the entrance his tongue had just left, all words and thoughts escaped you. Your body tensed, back arching against the rock beneath you. Words unbecoming of a lady fell from your lips as the hand that once tightly gripped the prince’s hair was now the one to push him away.

He looked over at you, concerned. What part of what he had done had been your undoing? He was curious, but right at that moment might not be the best time for him to ask and find out. “Wha-what was that?” You asked as you finally came down, but was still in the midst of catching your breath.

Your mind was reeling. Thoughts speeding around your mind like wild horses in the plains. “Ho-how did you do that? That…” You paused, heat creeping up from your neck to your cheeks. “That thing… with your tongue?” It was Hyunjins time to blush. Bashfulness painting his perfect skin.

“I don’t know.. I read about it in books and thought that maybe the authors I read would know a thing or two about what women like..” He shrugged a nonchalant edge to his words and actions like he didn’t just go down on you.

Then it dawned on you, the Prince of Volantis just ate you out on a rock a few towns outside of the kingdom. This certainly couldn’t be written about in the history books.

You tried your best to not feel awkward about this. You’d never done anything like this before and to make matters worse, you’d done it with the prince you were supposed to be protecting. Shame started to taint the afterglow you were feeling. “What’s wrong? Did I do something wrong?”

Hyunjin started to panic. The last thing he wanted was to do something that would make you regret this. Regret being with him. His heart started to beat erratically in his chest at the thought. Any sign of the flame of arousal was doused in the iciest waters. “Did-” He paused, tears starting to brim his ebony eyes. “Did I hurt you?” 

His voice was drenched in sadness and just the sound of it broke your heart. You shook your head, “No. Nothing of the sort. I just..” You covered your burning cheeks with your hands. “I was just pleasured by the prince of this very realm.. That’s a lot to take in.” He chuckled, mood visibly lifting. He hides his face in the crook of your neck. 

He wanted to say that he wanted to do this again. He wanted to be honest and a little forward and tell you just how much he hoped that when the dust settled, that you would remain by his side for eternity as his wife, his queen. But the words just wouldn’t come out of his mouth. He was afraid that this was a one and done situation and rather than finding out for himself, he’d rather just leave the words unspoken to not face the possible rejection.

You left the pond first after thoroughly washing up. Hyunjin took some time for himself to really reflect on what this meant. It was evident that there was some sort of attraction between the two of you, but how deep did that go? Was it just physical or was there something else, something much more profound?

Since he laid eyes on you, he couldn’t get you off his mind. Maybe it was because your destinies were intertwined, at least that what he figured was happening between the two of you. With his constant dreams of you now being on this journey with you. He knew there was something there, something that dragged the two of you together. Was it fate? He hoped so. He hoped that you were fated and not in a tragic way either. 

By the time he returned to camp an hour had flown by. You were tucked in, fast asleep. Minho was sitting by the fire whittling wood into some shape Hyunjin couldn’t recognize. Still needed to eat, he took a seat next to the quiet man and fixed himself a plate.

Minho didn’t look up at him at first, which eased the prince’s nerves, but that was quickly replaced with an overwhelmingly anxious feeling. Hyunjin was only a few bites in when he noticed the icy stare coming from his aphasic counterpart. The prince took a chance, looking up into his friend’s eyes. Everything in them saying, “If you hurt her, I will kill you.”

He had seen this man kill, catch, skin, and gut animals with nothing more than a dull knife, he knew that threat was on great standing. Hyunjin simply nodded, receiving a soft but scary smile from the man sitting next to him. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt you, but that threat alone gave him even more incentive to not fuck this up.

© ✐Channieskies 『MINORS DNI! This post contains nsfw material. Please do not interact with it if you are under the age of 18. Do not translate or repost here or on other sites. Please leave a like , comment, and reblog if you enjoyed this story.♥』

[gravityape]

I've been thinking a lot about how the Gquuuuuux trio parallel past characters written by Yoji Enokido and I thought I'd share some things I've noticed in case anyone else is interested (and also to try out posting on here).

The clearest analog so far is Machu and Nyaan to Lal’c and Nono from Diebuster, something which Yoji Enokido has directly acknowledged in an interview.

Both Machu and Lal’c start off in a place of privilege that excludes them from facing the troubles that Nono and Nyaan face. 

Lal’c’s abilities as a topless allow her to effortlessly pilot a buster machine and travel through space while Nono is forced to work at a dinner for little gain in the hopes of one day doing the same. 

Machu has lived a comfortable life away from the effects of the OYW while Nyaan’s status as a refugee due to the war forces her to face violence and take illegal jobs.  

With episode 5 we also have a similar reversal of fortunes for the characters as Nono and Nyaan step up and show themselves to be even more powerful than Lal’c and Machu. Lal’c’s jealousy towards Nono is based on her belief that the entire identity that she built for herself around being the best pilot in the Fraternity is being stripped away due to the loss of her topless powers while Nono is able to permanently take her place due to being a buster machine. Similarly, Machu’s jealousy in episode 5 is based around her fear that the dream of going to Earth and finding real freedom will be taken from her by Nyyaan taking her place as the Gquuuuuux pilot and Shuji's Mav.

This swapping of positions is also emphasized in both cases by the male love interests of Lal’c and Machu shifting their attention to the other girl as Nyaan becomes Shuji’s Mav and (much more upsettingly) Nicola attempts to rape Nono. 

While that’s as far as the Lal’c and Nono parallels currently go, I think that there are also some notable parallels between Machu and Nyaan and Utena and Anthy from Revolutionary Girl Utena.

 Machu shares some surface level traits with Utena such as her athleticism and how she draws the admiration of some of her classmates but the most significant parallel between them is how they stand up for others who are abused and how it draws them into their respective plots. Utena enters the duels because she was angered by Saionji’s treatment of Anthy and Wakaba and Machu is similarly drawn to the Gundam and by extension the clan battles due to seeing the oppression of the refugees like Nyaan (at least at first). 

Nyaan on the other hand has been beaten down by a hard life and has come to accept the abuse that she gets as a refugee just as Anthy has in her role as the Rose Bride. In both cases a darker side of their personality has been built up by their anger and resentment which we get to see explode out of Nyaan when she fights the Black Tri Stars. 

There is also another perceived “betrayal” regarding the male love interest when Utena thinks that Anthy is taking Akio from her but this scenario is significantly darker than Machu’s soap opera jealousy about Nyaan and Shuji as it involves the grooming and rape of both girls by Akio. 

While the parallels between Machu and Nyaan and some of Enokido’s other leads are pretty clear, the way that Shuji compares to his analogs is a bit messier. He seems to be filling a similar role to Nicola and Akio as the male love interest standing between the two female leads and he harbors secrets that will likely relate to significant plot developments just as Nicola’s involvement in excavating the space monster and Akio’s role as End of the World did in their shows. However Shuji also has some notable differences from these characters such as how he lacks a power imbalance with Machu and Nyaan, he isn’t significantly older than them like Akio and he isn’t their commanding officer like Nicola.  Shuji also doesn’t seem to be actively manipulating Machu and Nyaan like his analogs, he seems content to let them follow him on their own.   

There’s also a parallel that could be drawn between Shuji and Haruko from FLCL as both of them act as both of them act as an enticing lead into a new and dangerous world for their protagonists, however he once again lacks many troubling aspects of Haruko's relationship with Naota like the age gap. 

Shuji’s lack of manipulation towards the other leads that his analogs have could be explained by him being a conduit for the Red Gundam and likely by extension Char. Original U.C. Char was frequently manipulating others for his own gain and I wouldn’t be surprised if the strange coincidences that facilitate the plot of the show such as Machu receiving the mysterious text at the beginning are part of some larger plan that Char has. 

This also introduces the possibility that Shuji fills the role of the Rose Bride in this series rather than that of Akio/Nicola as he a tool for Char similarly to how Akio used Anthy. We haven’t seen much of a sign of it yet but perhaps his relationship with Machu and Nyaan will allow him to begin forming and expressing his own desires rather than the Gundam’s just as Anthy’s relationship with Utena allowed her to do the same. 

There’s also the possibility that both Shuji and Nyaan having parallels to Anthy could be hinting at them sharing a role. Nyaan having Conch in both her model kit and the ED could suggest that she’ll take over Shuji’s role if he dies or is taken by a zeknova.

Since I’m speculating on Shuji’s future I’ll do the same for Machu/Nyaan. If they keep up the Utena/Diebuster parallels then we’ll see an initial argument that worsens their relationship followed by one of the duo revealing their true feelings which will cause their relationship to reform stronger than ever. If this does end up happening in the next episode or two then Machu and Nyaan will have already reached the end point of Lal’c/Nono and Utena/Anthy’s relationship only half way through the show. I’m curious to see how Enokido could expand on their relationship beyond his usual tropes. 

Anyways there’s also the possibility that all of these parallels are being done just to play with the audience’s expectations and the show is going to swerve into a completely different direction in the coming episodes so take my thoughts with a grain of salt. 

[sen-rj]

Angel of small death.

Character- Levi x reader

Summary- meeting a hot stranger at an underground speakeasy can't be so bad... right?

Tags- Levi x reader, modern au, SMUTYYY, we will get there eventually, lots of tension, lots of build up!

Intro

- - -

Best kept secret.

(summers Over Interlude- Drake, Majid Jordan)

The air was brisk against your cheeks as you walked down the busy city streets. Your apartment wasn't far from work, a simple 10 minute walk, but on cold and rainy days like today 10 minutes feels like an hour. Seattle was known for its cold, dreary weather, but you were still becoming accustomed to it.

The sound of your heels clicking on the pavement was washed out by the sirens, honks, and loud engines on the road. If it wasn't for the pause in traffic, you would've missed the sound of your phone ringing.

“Hello?” you stumble as you try to balance holding your bag, your umbrella, and now a phone to your ear.

“Hey! I missed you at work today, I was meaning to ask you something.” the sound of your coworkers voice, Pieck, quietly comes through the speakers.

“Oh, yeah, what's up?” you say as you now fumble to get your keycard to get into your apartment building.

“So… me and some other people from work like to go out to this one place on friday nights.” she stops talking to speak to someone else, then her voice is louder again. “I didn't want to tell you until we got an extra reservation but I finally got you one. You down?” she asks.

“Um… what is it?” you ask, stepping into the elevator.

“It's hard to explain, but kind of like a bar? But also a lounge, but also there's live music, but it's not like a venue. Oh, and it's like super top secret.” she says, her voice cutting in and out due to the elevator.

You knew you should probably say yes. You haven't gone out once since you moved out here, which is almost six months now. You also had yet to use your real ID to go out since turning 21. You should say yes, but knowing your bed is waiting for you after this long day is too tempting.

You sigh, “I don't know Pieck, maybe next time.” you say as the elevator doors ding open.

“Oh come on! It took so much work to get you a reservation there. Just one night, and of you hate it you can leave and never go out with us again.” she begs.

Rolling your eyes as you unlock the door and set your things down, taking off your uncomfortable heels. “Why would you try so hard if you didn't even know if I'd go?”

“Because I knew you'd go. Because I'm making you. You need to get out! You just got promoted! Celebrate, drink, get laid, something. You're too uptight.”

“Wow thanks.”

“Come on. I'll send you the address. We all meet there at 7 and then we will walk in together. It's a bit complicated so it's easier if we all go at once.” she says, before sending the address over, saying her goodbyes, and hanging up.

“Great.” you say to yourself, plopping down onto the couch.

-

You look over at Pieck, confused. “Where are we?” you ask, becoming anxious. Meeting in a sketchy alleyway was nerve wracking enough, but now as you walk down the alley, you notice a small door that Pieck stops at.

“Relax, we go here all the time.” Reiners voice startles you as he comes up behind you.

“Yeah, it really isn't a big deal. It seems weird at first, but you'll see.” Porco places a hand on your shoulder, an odd comfort in the moment.

“Just go already, people are waiting down there.”Annie speaks up, pushing past you and pressing a small gold button beside the door. After a few moments, the door unlatches and she pushes it open.

Pieck looks at you with a wide smile on her face. “Go on.” she encourages. And you do.

Following behind Annie, you look around confused. You were all now walking through what seemed like a warehouse? Or maybe just an abandoned building? There was a small voice in your head telling you that you should just run away, and that maybe your new friends were actually trying to kill you for your new promotion. Reiner and Porco laugh and joke around behind you, which eases your anxiety just a tad.

Annie then turns, opening another door that leads to some steps into an even darker, even sketchier hallway. Metal gates cover the walls with random posters and graffiti. You look at pieck nervously, and she just smiles again.

Finally, after walking down the dark and long hallway, you reach a golden door with a large handle going down the length of it vertically. Annie turns and gives you a wink, before pushing the handle with both hands and opening the door.

As the door opens, the smell of cigarettes and the sound of soft music fills your senses. Pieck gives you a little nudge on the back, and you start to follow annie inside the door. The room is dark, but still light enough for you to find you way. Extravagant light fixtures hand from the ceiling, and small candles on every surface bring a calming vibe to the strange room. Room was putting it lightly, it felt more like a restaurant. There were classy leather seats surrounding short tables on one side of the room, looking into the center of the room where a grand piano sat. facing the other side of the piano was the bar. Hundreds of bottles of expensive liquor lined up on glass shelved that were back lit by soft light. Their reflections catching in a large, circular mirror that was on the ceiling, allowing you to see yourself, and the amused looks of your coworkers behind you.

“See. Not so bad, eh?” Reiner says, walking past you and giving you a playful nudge on the arm as he walks towards the bar. Porco raises his eyebrows to you and follows behind reiner.

“Ready for a drink?” Pieck asks, pushing me towards the bar.

-

The last thing Levi wanted to do tonight was go out. He hated the busy streets on friday nights. He hated the loud drunks that would run into him. He hated the smell of cheap liquor and fruity smoke. He hated loud music with too much bass and weird lyrics. He hated it all. He would much prefer to spend his night at home with some quiet jazz on his expensive record player. Maybe make some nice dinner and read that book he picked up earlier that week at a thrift store.

But, when Erwin mentioned that this place had live music, reservation only, and top of the line whiskey, he couldn't help but be interested. He hated to admit it, but he was in need of something social. He only wished that the biggest pain in his ass, Hange, wouldn't be there to ruin it.

He agreed to one night. One Hour. Him and Erwin shook on it.

Running his fingers through his raven hair, he checks the time on the silver watch that sits on his opposite wrist. 7. Perfect. He had just enough time to pregame a small glass in his kitchen to take the edge off before he had to meet them at 7:30.

Swallowing the last of the dark liquid, he checks his watch again and throws on a black suit jacket to go over his black button down. Locking the door behind him, he walks out into the hallway, hitting the button to take him to the ground floor. Erwin greets him at the entrance to his building.

“Levi.” Erwin nods.

“Prick.” Levi responds. Erwin laughs and begins walking down the sidewalk.

“I'm glad you agreed to come. I think you'll enjoy it. Great way to meet new people too. Everyone that goes here usually becomes familiar with one another.” The tall man says, leading the way down the busy Seattle streets.

“Great.” Levi says sarcastically.

He follows Erwin as he crosses the street, walking towards a dark alleyway. Levi's eyes narrow, looking at Erwin in confusion. “What is this? A ploy to kill me cause I called you a prick?”

Erwin laughed. “Certainly not. Look, there is Hange.”

“Fucking great.” Levi rolls his eyes.

As the trio walks down the alleyway, to the door, push the button, down the hall, another door, down the stairs, down the hall, and to the golden door, Levi feels his alcohol from before. Or maybe it was fatigue from the long, dark trip. Either way, he is regretting his decision.

Erwin opens the large door, leading Levi inside as he walks towards a group of leather chairs in the back corner of the room. Levi takes it all in, pleasantly surprised. He ignores the people in the room that greet Erwin. His main goal right now was to find a seat and steady his head for a moment. Taking a seat in the surprisingly comfortable chair, Levi takes a deep breath. His eyes scan the room, taking in the scene. He hated to admit that it was much nicer than he expected. His gaze is drawn to the bar, inspecting his options from afar. His eyes linger on a particular bottle of his favorite selection and he decides that maybe this wasn't an awful idea.

A figure sitting at the bar to the right of his bottle adjusts in her seat, crossing her legs. Levi noticed, his glare moving from the bottle to the round of her hips. The opening of the back of her dress. The flow of her hair on his shoulders.

For once, he's glad to have said yes to Erwins shenanigans.

-------------------

Chapter 1

[rik1sberry]

I THINK I LOVED YOU IN SILENCE FIRST — yang jungwon

synopsis, two life long friends tiptoe around unspoken feelings until a quiet confession and first kiss change everything.

paring, yang jungwon x female reader

setting, final year of high school

genre, slow burn, friends to lovers, fluff, comfort, angst (light)

content warning, emotional vulnerability, kissing

word count, 1715 words

perm taglist, send an ask to be added

You’ve always known Jungwon.

Not in the world stopping, dramatic kind of way. He just… existed in your life. Consistently. Quietly. The way your favourite sweater waits folded at the bottom of your drawer, the way your umbrella’s always slightly damp by the door. He was there.

You met in the second year of middle school during an after-school clean-up. Both of you had forgotten to turn in an assignment. While the rest of the group grumbled about sweeping the hallway, Jungwon quietly dusted the desks, sleeves rolled up, lips slightly pursed in focus.

You offered him a second rag without saying anything.

He blinked at you, then took it with a small nod.

That was it. That's where it started.

⸻

You never really grew into your friendship. You simply grew with it.

By high school, people rarely said one of your names without the other. You weren't loud or clingy, not the kind of duo that posted selfies every weekend or gave each other nicknames. You were the kind of friends who shared earbuds on the bus. Who didn't need to talk while walking home. Who quietly knew when the other was tired just from the way they blinked.

You'd send him screenshots of weird math problems with a string of crying emojis. He'd respond with a photo of his scribbled notes and a single word: “help.” You made each other laugh in quiet snorts and shoulder bumps, not loud crackles.

But feelings are like seeds. Even when they're small, even when you pretend not to see them, they still grow.

⸻

You noticed it one late afternoon.

The sun was starting to set, casting that golden light that made everything feel like a memory in real time. You were both walking back from, cram school, shoulder to shoulder, when a sudden gust of wind made you shiver.

Without a word, Jungwom unwrapped his scarf and draped it around your neck, still warm from his skin.

“Your nose is red,” he said.

You mumbled a thank you, clutching the scarf tighter, pretending your heart hadn't just lept into your throat.

That night, you stared at the ceiling in your room, scarf still in your lap. And for the first time, you let yourself wonder.

What if you liked him?

No… what I'd you’d always liked him?

And what if it was too late to unlike him?

⸻

The more you tried to ignore it, the louder the feelings become.

You’d catch yourself staring at his hands when he wrote, noticing how his thumb tapped his pen when he was thinking. You’d overthink every smile, every text with a heart emoji, every moment his finger brushed yours.

You noticed the little things.

The way his eyes softened when he looked at you.

The way he always saved the last bite of his snack and quietly handed it to you without being asked.

The way your name sounded when he said it… warm, familiar, like a promise.

But you were terrified.

Because the friendship was safe.

And love? Love could ruin everything

⸻

You started pulling away… slowly, almost unnoticeably. Fewer texts. Excuses to not walk home. Choosing seats slightly farther away in the library. You told yourself you were protecting what you had.

But Jungwom noticed.

Of course he did.

One nippy afternoon, he waited for you outside the school gates, holding a canned coffee in each hand.

You hesitated when you saw him.

“Hey,” he said, offering you one.

You took it wordlessly. He walked beside you for a while before finally asking, “Did I do something wrong”

You stopped walking.

What? No.”

“Then why are you avoiding me?”

You looked down at your shoes. “I’m not—”

“Yes, you are,” he said, more gently this time. “Did I say something? Is it about the scarf thing? Or that time I—”

“It’s not you,” you blurted.

He blinked. “Then what is it?”

You gripped the can tighter.

“It’s me,” you said quietly. “I just… I needed space.”

“Why?”

Because I love you. Because I can’t look at you without wanting to hold your hand. Because your laugh makes my chest hurt in the best and worst ways.

You didn’t say any of that.

Instead, you whispered, “I didn’t want to ruin anything.”

He was silent for a long time.

Then: “Ruin what?”

You couldn’t answer. So you walked ahead, and he didn’t follow.

⸻

Days passed.

He didn’t text first. You didn’t either.

But everything felt off. Like going to school with mismatched socks or forgetting your phone at home. Like half of something was missing.

It was a Sunday when he showed up at your door.

Your mom let him in without asking.

You found him sitting on your porch step, hoodie strings tangled in his fingers, like he’d been picking at them for a while.

“You said you didn’t want to ruin anything,” he said when you sat down beside him.

You nodded, eyes tracing the edge of the step.

There was a pause. Then, a small breath.

“Can I tell you something?”

You glanced at him, heart already too loud.

“I think I’ve liked you for a while,” he said softly. “But I didn’t know how to tell you. And when you started pulling away, I figured maybe it was just me. Like I made it all up in my head.”

Your breath caught.

Your throat felt tight. “You… like me?”

He nodded. “I still do.”

You stared at him, the words sinking in too slowly.

“I didn’t know,” you whispered. “I really didn’t.”

His laugh was quiet, almost shy. “Guess I wasn’t as obvious as I thought.”

“I thought you just… cared,” you said, voice small. “I didn’t think it was more than that.”

He looked at you for a long moment, then reached out carefully, like he was afraid to spook you, and brushed his fingers against yours.

“I’ve always cared,” he said. “Just maybe in a way I couldn’t name yet.”

Your fingers curled into his.

And for once, you didn’t try to hide the way your heart was shaking.

“I like you too,” you said. “I didn’t want to admit it. I thought if I did, I’d lose you.”

“You won’t,” he said instantly.

A soft silence fell between you, like an exhale neither of you had realized you were holding.

Then, quieter than before: “Can I kiss you?”

You nodded, barely, eyes already starting to close.

He leaned in slowly, his breath brushing yours. When his lips met yours, it felt like the gentlest question and the answer you’d been waiting to give. Soft and warm and a little nervous, but it felt right. Like something that had always been there, finally spoken out loud.

When he pulled back, your faces hovered close, still caught in the hush of it all.

“Was that okay?” he asked.

You gave a small smile. “Yeah. It was more than okay.”

He let out a breath, then took your hand and pressed it lightly to his chest.

“Feel that?” he whispered. “It’s been like that since the moment I saw you again.”

Your heart stuttered.

“I think mine’s been like that longer than I knew,” you said.

You stayed there, side by side, wrapped in a quiet that didn’t feel empty this time. It felt full. Like everything had finally found its place.

A week later, someone spotted your hands loosely intertwined as you left the school gates.

“Wait. Are you two…?”

Jungwon looked at you, eyes soft.

You gave a small nod. “Yeah. We are.”

No grand moment. No announcement. Just a soft beginning that felt like the next step in something already real.

⸻

One evening, you found yourselves in his room again, books pushed aside, the window cracked open just enough to let in the cool breeze. His dog lay curled at your feet, head resting on his paws, snoring quietly like he belonged in that moment just as much as the two of you did.

Jungwon was lying on his back, arms behind his head, staring at the ceiling. You were next to him, close enough that your shoulders touched when you both shifted at the same time.

It was quiet. Not the awkward kind, not anymore. Just quiet the way comfortable things are. You let your eyes wander to the side and found him already watching you.

“I used to think about this a lot,” he said softly.

You tilted your head. “What do you mean?”

“This. Us. Lying here like this. You next to me, but not just as my friend.”

Your chest tightened. “When?”

He smiled a little, eyes still on you. “I don’t know. For a while now. I didn’t even realise what I was feeling at first. It was just… you. Always you.”

You stared at him, heart fluttering.

“I think I loved you in silence first,” he said. “Before I could admit it to myself. Before I ever thought you’d feel the same.”

You didn’t answer right away. Instead, you let the moment sit. His dog shifted and stretched beside you, soft paws twitching in a dream. Outside, wind moved through the trees like a whisper.

“I think I felt it too,” you said at last. “I just didn’t know that’s what it was. I thought it was comfort. Familiarity. I didn’t realise it could be love.”

“It was,” he said quietly. “Even then.”

You turned toward him, propping yourself up on one elbow.

“Thank you,” you whispered.

“For what?”

“For being patient. For letting it be quiet until I was ready to hear it.”

His smile softened. “I’d wait all over again if I had to.”

You leaned in, pressing your forehead gently against his.

“I don’t want silence anymore,” you murmured. “I want this. You. Every version.”

He kissed you again, slow and sure, with the kind of calm that comes when everything has finally settled into place.

His hand found yours, warm and steady.

And there, in the quiet safety of his room, with his dog asleep beside you and the air filled with everything that didn’t need to be spoken anymore, you let the silence fade.

What remained was something real.

Something that had always been growing, patiently, between the lines.

Love, finally named. Finally heard.

© rik1sberry

[mmrcr8tivity]

ECLIPSE RAMBLING!

Not sure if this would be considered a theory or headcanon or what, but-

Do you think Eclipse has problems with his identity? I mean like his actual identity, who he is.

From the very beginning Eclipse struggled with coming to terms with who he was now. In one of the earliest episodes (one where Sun was destroying the old pizzerias) Eclipse comes out at some point. During this time he shouted "I AM MOON!" Then had to correct himself realizing that he wasn't and he was supposed to be mimicking Sun. If I'm remembering correctly, this was before Eclipse revealed himself as Eclipse. Meaning he was still in the mentally that he was Moon.

We see something like this much later when Nexus, before he was Nexus, took him to Earth for therapy. He started rambling on and at some point said something along the lines of ". . And being the original m-" then cut himself off. You can hear that M sound before he stops implying he was about to say Moon. So even then he was still clinging to the idea of being his old self again.

Once he gets to his new dimension in EAPS, he starts to talk about how he used to be a killcode. Not THE killcode because he knew that guy was dead and he couldn't be him. He also talked about how the Moon here was acting how he used to. However he would always say something like "back then" instead of "when I was still Moon", suggesting he's come to terms in a way that he never was Moon.

Now we have some of our more recent moments with other characters having the same name as him. Starting with Eklipse. The second the guy found out who Eclipse was he started to call him "the fake one" or "the imposter". Our original retaliated with calling the other "freak", but now he's stopped. If you hear him mention the broken down version he will call him Eklipse.

Leading into our next guy, Ruin. In one of the most recent episodes "Ruin Snaps", Monty calls Ruin by his original name. Eclipse responds with: "What?" Likely out of confusion because she was on Ruin's side. But then she responded with. "His name's Eclipse, not just Ruin." And after that Eclipse stays silent. I can't be the only one to think that had some sort of impact on the guy. Because then he says if anything goes wrong he's doing his plan and leaves.

A slight moment here, not really involving other people, is Eclipse's break down. When he starts to cry to Roxy about the problem at hand and how he's failing, he starts to question he purpose. Saying things like "If I can't fix this, what am I good for?" And "If I'm not the smart guy, who am I?" This shows that Eclipse puts more on what he can do than who he is as a person.

Getting a little obscure here, but I don't think it's too far out. Let's focus on Solar. We all know Eclipse and Solar don't like each other. Solar because Eclipse was, and still sort of is, a terrible guy. Eclipse hates Solar, not just because he hates everybody, but because he sees Solar as the preferred version. In one of his conversations with Puppet (Matt), she tries convincing Eclipse to stay because there are people who care about him, and that he could become a part of the family. Eclipse responds with saying something along the lines of "They have the one they want." I'd say Eclipse is kind of jealous of Solar, because he got to have everything that was taken from him since day 1. He got the life Moon had taken from him with the separation. And I'm sure Solar getting better and being a part of the family doesn't help because it shows that Eclipse had multiple chances to make that a reality, but didn't do it.

Finally I'll end with the Mimic. The Mimic showed that people really didn't like Eclipse's personality. He could go by any name and have any face, but if it's the real him in control then people will steer away. This is seen especially on the first day Mimic has control. They started to act a little bit nicer to everyone and immediately everybody said how much they prefered the "New Eclipse". The Mimic had also made multiple mistakes on Eclipse's behavior, but nobody seemed notice. The Mimic was making people happy even when he went back to being more mean like the real Eclipse. It took people a month to find out and by then the Mimic had basically revealed himself.

I feel like all of this is creating this identity crisis in himself. Because if he isn't Moon, Solar, KC, or Eclipse. Who is he? The smart one? No, because there are more people just as smart or smarter than him. Maybe if he was someone else? But that wouldn't work because he'd still be the same jerk everyone gets mad at.

Yes, Eclipse needs to work on his attitude in order to improve, but if we're going on the idea of "his true self", then he might feel like he's running out of options.

Anyway. Thanks for listening to my ramble. Have a nice day!

[necroticblue]

a new fun idea for @amazingphil and @danielhowell: read homestuck in its entirety! fourteen and a half years after it started! it's gonna be fun trust me! : )

[free-luigi-mangione]

Damn you’re delusional. The second a luigi supporter is accepting and is aware he committed the crime, you libtards are quick to say we’re licking boots and not real supporters. Luigi would hate you guys. Alright, I’ll see you in the future when he isn’t with us or when he gets convicted, sadly.

you anon i need you to both hold your horses and hold your vicious tongue. i'll spell this out for you since you have worse reading comprehension than the average person on the piss poor reading comprehension website.

even if Luigi himself says he did it, he deserves a fair trial. he deserves to be presumed innocent. because both of these are rights afforded to him by the constitution of his country. and because even if he did in fact do it, he hasn't said that and he has pleaded not guilty, the prosecution has to actually prove he is guilty beyond any reasonable doubt. and from what we know of the evidence there's plenty of reasonable doubt. moreover Luigi has nowhere not for a single second tried to kill himself. if he had indeed done it and he wanted to kill himself, he had to have had plenty of time before he got arrested – five whole days in fact. he has never shown himself to want to be a martyr or a symbol of a resistance movement that the people of his country can't even organize properly/very effectively. if he did want to make himself a symbol or a martyr like the way you want him to be, he could have simply given himself up to the authorities after the deed was done. he could have confessed everything to the cops, then or at the time of his arrest or anytime in between or even in the future. but that hasn't happened and that won't happen. Luigi and his legal team are fighting the charges and will continue fighting the charges until it ends with him being killed by the death penalty (extremely unlikely at NY), or rotting in prison because of LWOP, or getting acquitted due to a number of reasons. moreover he does not want to die and has clearly shown that he in fact wants to live, and it doesn't matter if he did it or not. he should be able to live. his right to life should not be taken away from him. it is the most fundamental of all human rights. death penalties are the most barbaric tools still kept alive in the modern society to enforce organised violence from the people in power. Luigi also deserves the right to live properly, not just survive somehow in LWOP. because like people like you think, he did it but you support him for it. so clearly you should also be wanting him to be free and to be able to live the life that he wants to live?? but of course not. y'all are dumb that way. also making Luigi a martyr or a symbol of a revolution that will probably never happen (at least not in a country like USA where there has never been a successful revolution in history because the majority population does not know how to organise at all) is absolutely useless. Luigi would lose his life for nothing. the dumbass population which would benefit from his alleged actions (and are already benefitting now) does not really care whether he lives or dies. and most importantly, like i said, he doesn't even want to die, he's never wanted to die. even in prison, he's written in a letter that the lorax is such a fundamental story that it “will be so critical to read to my kids”. the quoted part is me directly quoting that letter word by word by the way. so like how dare you want to take away his life all while saying you support him?? if you truly wanted to support him you'd understand that the letter of the law doesn't matter for his case even if he did it, only the spirit of the law matters and anybody on the jury should judge his case only by their hearts and not their heads. and since you seem to be the sort to think that the letter of the law is an absolutely fundamental aspect and nothing else can come out of it, you seem to be the libtard to me, the sort of person who'd say well he murdered a man and i can never justify it so he should die, an eye for an eye. let me tell you anon, an eye for an eye only works until everybody is blind. and everybody would soon become blind if an eye for an eye is actually followed everywhere in real life. also because you seem to be too dumb to understand a lot of things about how the law actually works, i'd request you to find out what is jury nullification and exactly how it works, you of all people need to learn that lesson because you seem to not at all understand the concept of laws without morals being useless.

[northwest-by-a-train]

Oh this is scathing