#the rest i think ppl can avoid w the warnings already placed at top

[aliferous-ly]

Seeing Red

based on this by @illogicallyinclined​ because um? i love it ? i took a fewww creative liberties also wrath is rage bc i didnt see the wrath tags until After writing so /peace sign/

warnings: injury, blood, knife as a weapon, loud terrible noises (like nails on a chalkboard esque), bliiinding, eye trauma, basically all the og warning tags plus like. logan freaking out

<3

--

Logan clutched at his collar. Air clogged in his throat like it moved through molasses, and he tore the first few buttons clean off of his shirt. His tie, already loosened, flopped, almost completely undone, against his chest. 

“Shit shit shit shit!” 

“Virgil?” 

“Honey, what’s going--”

“Goddamnit!” Virgil’s voiced pounded against Logan’s ears. He could hear Patton worrying, hear Roman asking what to do, while Virgil shouted, his voiced fused with frustration-anger-fear-fear-fear. 

“I’m gone!” Virgil finally said. “I’m gone! He took control, I’m gone.” 

And by that, of course, he meant he no longer could influence Thomas’s decisions. Patton’s control had flown out the window rather early on, similarly with Roman’s. Virgil, the deep-seated highly volatile Anxiety, usually kept the reigns for… ever. He’d never slipped yet. Anxiety had some sort of hand in nearly every part of Thomas’s life. 

Logan could hear all of this happening, but he was in another room. Not completely by choice, he’d been tugged there by… something, something, why can’t he remember -- and, well. He couldn’t really breathe. But it was fine. Everything was fine. 

A sharp, piercing noise shot through his head like a knife scraping down a chalkboard. A warbled gasp of pain shot from his lips but -- but -- 

“Logan! We have to get -- we have to get Logan--” Virgil’s voice cut through the walls, loud and frantic. 

“Calm down, calm down, he’s fine.” Roman’s. Strong, willful Roman. Steady and flighty all at once. 

“No, he’s -- Rage -- he’s --” Logan could hear the words tearing from Virgil’s mouth in gasps, bullet words catching on the wind. 

“He’s just in the other room, I’ll go get him.” Patton, now. A gentle force from behind, a safety net. The doorknob rattled. A knock. Logan hadn’t locked the door. 

“Logan, buddy?” Patton called out. Tentative, concerned, fear-fear-fear--

The piercing noise grew to a cacophonous level until he couldn’t hear what was happening, here there or anywhere, a never-ending onslaught of high-pitched noise barraging his senses, stuffing his brain with nothing but echoes and ringing and he couldn’t hear everything he touched was static and -- 

Silence. 

“Oh, Logan~” 

He knew that voice. He knew that voice, so why couldn’t he remember -- 

His senses flooded back to him, one right after another. Carpet under his fingers, a steady beating in his ears, two black leather boots with pitch dark spikes. 

He looked up. 

Rage smiled, lips stretching and gruesome. His teeth glinted bright, bright white. Logan could feel his heart in his throat, a foreign feeling sweeping through him. An external pounding echoed in the back of his mind, like it was happening but he couldn’t -- really -- hear -- 

Then Logan blinked and realized that his teeth weren’t the only things glinting, that he was holding a long -- silver -- knife. 

Logan scrambled to his feet with a reserve of energy he didn’t know he had, everything loud and narrow and bright. 

“Oh, don’t freak, freak,” Rage said. He twirled the blade once, twice, before a power-hungry grin overtook his face. “I’d say it’s nothing personal but I’m going to relish every moment of this.” 

“Don’t--” Logan extended his palms but in moments Rage was upon him, gripping at his arms his shirt his tie -- Logan pushed against him, something primal and raw erupting as he yelled. Rage’s wrists were burning, hotter than anything Logan knew, his hands slipping against rough obsidian skin. Rage was a flurry of limbs and Logan couldn’t see, couldn’t see, couldn’t see and --

The knife hovered above his eyes, just between his glasses. Rage laughed and laughed and laughed, eyes flung open wide, golden red eyes -- orange black eyes -- fire and brimstone -- 

The bridge of his glasses snapped. 

The world erupted into red. 

“Can you see it?” Rage might’ve whispered or yelled but it all sounded the same to Logan’s ears, crashing waves of fear and pain filling his head. Can you see it? 

The color was never ending, lacking depth and feeling and Roman loved red, he loved the color, but it didn’t feel like Roman, this hateful burning hellfire scarlet -- everything hurt, it hurt and he couldn’t see because of all the fucking red in his vision, he just wanted it all to go away and --

Silence. 

Rage was gone -- Logan could sense it, in the room. Rage’s presence filled every crack, every hole. He needed to be seen, had to be known. Rage was gone. Rage was… gone. 

Logan choked. His ears burned. Something viscous and warm slogged down his cheeks and Logan thought, well, tears are thicker than I remember, well, would the others find him, well, Rage really got what he wanted. 

And then he remembered, oh. Oh. Tears don’t hurt, not like this. Not like this. 

And he remembered the big silver knife, settled between his eyes, and Logan realized his eyes weren’t closed. He wasn’t guarding himself against a bright world. He no longer saw red and instead everything was -- 

Dark. 

A sob tore from his throat. His shoulders shook and he trembled, trembled for someone to help, for someone to give him his sight back give it back --

Hysteria rose and he forced it down. Object impermanence renders you --

But Rage was different than Remus, Logan knew this -- 

Object impermanence renders you pretty unintimidating. 

Something loud cracked, like wood splintering in half. 

What’s so frightening about something with no real world impact?

A warm touch, cool against his burning skin. Soft hair against his neck and ears, a pressure on his arms. Movement, smooth and swift, the fabric of the couch against his elbows. 

Someone wrapped their arms around him, sideways, like they leaned against -- against the arm of the couch, and his own back was against the back of the couch. 

The muffled ringing in his ears subsided, just enough. He could feel fabric -- a sweatshirt? -- against his arms. A voice murmured in his ear and as time trekked on he could make out more and more. 

“We’re here,” the voice was saying. Virgil was saying. Virgil, who was holding on tight to Logan, unwilling to let him go. Undoubtedly getting blood all over his sweatshirt because that’s what was dripping down Logan’s face. That’s what was… 

“It hurts,” Logan said. 

Virgil pressed his forehead against Logan’s jawbone, lips against his shoulder. “I know. I know. Roman and Patton are here to help.” 

Logan made a small, pitiful noise, but when they asked -- Roman, Logan thinks, but the voice was so soft it could’ve been Patton -- if they could help him, treat him, he nodded. 

It hurt so much less than he thought it would. 

Logan knew that cleaning wounds -- anywhere, not just on the face -- hurt like hell. Hurt almost more than the initial wound, because the residual adrenaline had worn off by then. But he barely noticed it -- a prick, a tug. He was more aware of Virgil’s heavy weight around his torso, his head pressed against Logan’s neck. 

“Done,” Roman (definitely Roman, Logan was positive this time) said. “Patton brought some soft clothes for you.” 

“Thomas,” Logan said. “What about--”

“Thomas is fine,” Virgil said, interrupted. “After…” He swallowed. Logan could feel it in the way his shoulders shifted, in the closeness of his chest. 

“After Rage left,” Roman picked up. “Patton found a crack and forced through.” 

“Thomas is letting off steam,” Patton said. His touch landed on Logan’s arm, feather-light. Fabric followed soon after and Logan just -- Logan just moved when he could, as Patton and -- Virgil, slowly dressed him. “He needs to take a breather. Rage is being released in a healthy coping mechanism.” 

Logan nodded, suddenly exhausted. “He’s okay.” 

“He’s okay,” Patton confirmed. “And you are, too.” 

Logan didn’t say anything. Because he didn’t know if his sight would return. Logically, probably, maybe. When Thomas recovered his faculties then Logan would… return to himself. Five senses and all. 

But… 

What if it didn’t? Would he be blind for -- for the rest of Thomas’s life? 

Virgil tightened his grip. Not enough to be painful, but just enough for a surge of appreciation and comfort to flow through Logan’s veins. He felt -- he felt safe, in Virgil’s arms. He knew Patton and Roman were close. And with those around him he was guarded from the rest of the world. 

Another wave of exhaustion swept through him. 

“I’d hug you, but Virgil’s kinda hogging all your hug time,” Patton said. Joked. 

Logan’s lips quirked. It was weak, but it was there. 

Virgil settled his chin atop Logan’s shoulder. “Nope. I’m legally obligated to stay here.” 

“Rude,” Roman said. “I knew you were a dragon but I didn’t know you were this much of a hoarder.” 

Virgil hissed at him. Something comforting and relieved exploded in Logan’s chest, releasing in a singular exhale of almost-laughter. 

“Did you just -- did he just hiss at me?” 

“There there, Roman,” Patton said. “It’s okay. I’ll hug you.” 

“Thanks, padre. You’re my favorite.” 

Logan imagined Virgil sticking his tongue out at Roman, imagined Patton and Roman giving each other the biggest, most obnoxious hug known to man. 

“Thank you,” Logan said. The words were dusty, and warbled, and choked, but they were there. 

“Of course,” Virgil said. 

“It’s no problem,” Roman said. He sounded like he’d tried for boasting but couldn’t manage to sneak out the soft undertone. 

“We’re always here for you, Logan,” Patton said. 

His heart lightened. Logan didn’t smile, he didn’t know if he had the energy for it, but he was… content? Comforted. Maybe even happy. 

“This won’t happen again,” Virgil promised. “I have a brand new crippling fear of Rage taking over. He won’t ever gain this much power, ever again.” 

“That’s good,” Logan said, because it was. Thomas shouldn’t be enraged so completely, he shouldn’t lose control so fully. And now Virgil had the means… to prevent it. And Patton had evidently grown stronger, too, being able to wrench some of Rage’s control from him. 

And with Virgil by his side, Roman and Patton aiding him every step of the way… they were okay. 

Logan could breathe. 

Everything was okay. 

[alo-piss-trancy]

(fire emoji) p5

Okay I have quite a few unpopular opinions I’d like to get off my chest so here we go (keep in mind these are p much just personal preferences so don’t feel bad if you actually like the things I’m about to rag on lmao)

Also I apologize if these show up in the actual tags I don’t want to put slashes in all of these names and ships RIP

!!!WARNING FOR BIG GAME SPOILERS!!!

1. Akechi/Akira is my least fav p5 ship and ngl I feel burning disgust 98% of the time I see it. Both characters are interesting on their own and I love the similarities and contrasts between them (I live for those perfect protag/antag foils), and I do really like those bits where they could ALMOST be close friends but then it gets fucked up mmm. I also like 1 of them pining for the other on occasion (or in Akechi’s case, possibly going past that into obsessive lust) but the other has no interest in anything deeper. But I can’t see them in love at all, especially in content that sticks to canon since there’s so many time constraints and scenarios that would prevent them from having the opportunity to actually form a true relationship.

But also putting all that aside it mostly bothers me because the entire pairing just REEKS of the completely overdone “These two rivals are opposites and boys so they HAVE TO BE secretly in love and super gay for each other” kinda thing that used to be (coughstilliscough) all over the place in other fandoms. Like, I guess potentially in the right hands it could be done well and actually develop the relationship between them, but I really just despise that type of ship in 98% of fandoms and nearly any time I see Akechi/Akira content it seems pretty forced and is clearly wish fulfillment/desperate craving for gay representation.

RIP I know that sounds harsh as hell, I really don’t know how to word my feelings on it in a more coherent manner so this is the best I can explain it? People can ship whatever they want ofc and if I ever spot good content or it has smth I like (like omo fics) I’m down to read it, but it’s definitely a ship I usually try to avoid simply because I’m sick and tired of seeing it EVERYWHERE (and there’s so many other people Akira is canonically closer to/much more likely to fall in love with)

2. In a similar vein, Akira/Yusuke gets on my nerves almost as much as the above. I just don’t see much chemistry between them so it seems a bit forced, but also it’s kind of a personal bias because I just. I don’t like Yusuke. He irritates me so much he somehow pushed all my buttons when I first met him and I ignored him FOR MY ENTIRE GAME and gave him shitty coffee and if Akechi and Mishima hadn’t made me even angrier I probably would call him my least fav character in the game. That said, I’m going to try hanging out with him more than twice and actually USE HIM IN MY PARTY in my ng+ so maybe I’ll learn to warm up to him. And despite my distaste I will admit his lines are some of THE FUCKING FUNNIEST (esp his bits in Mementos jfc)

Also Akira/Ryuji irritates me too bc I also get real tired of the ‘bffs fall in love trope’ and I think they each have ppl that fit them better, but in some instances it can be really cute or kinda deep so I enjoy looking at it on occasion. I’m mostly just tired of it drowning the tags when I’m looking for other Akira pairings lmao

3. Sadayo Kawakami isn’t that great and idk why ppl hail her as one of the best girls. I actually liked her a lot when she first appeared in the game but once you start her social link and get into all the other shit I just got really bored and annoyed with her? I don’t know why because while I didn’t finish it (I got to 7 or 8 I think but then the late game plot dragged me into madness so I couldn’t find time to meet her anymore) I got to one of the big plot points in her arc and it was sad that it happened but…I was already so irritated by all of her lying and she was starting to rub me the wrong way bc despite her being 'kind’ it seemed like any dialogue I picked even when it helped her brought some snark or just obnoxious moping from her so I just kinda. Stopped giving a shit about her. I’ll max her in NG+ this time so I can see the end and hopefully I’ll feel more for her since I know most of what happened but I don’t think she’ll ever be as important to me as The Squad Girls or Tae or Hifumi.

As a character I still like her and there are certain plot aspects I really find interesting/deliciously angsty if expanded on, but I definitely wouldn’t say she’s waifu material lmao

4. Now for an actual game critique: I feel they definitely started off WAY too strong with the first palace/boss, so most of the future game (palace design/boss fights, not the plot the plot’s always top tier) seem kind of underwhelming by comparison. Like the entire way the plot progresses in Palace #1 is awesome when you’re brand new to the game/series and the boss is the perfect Holy Shit moment because, like, just look at that revolting mess, it’s super different from anything you saw before that point in the game and kinda scary to fight and it’s badass. But then a lot of the rest just doesn’t have the same shock or high stakes feeling to it or the palaces aren’t as interesting. Cool and creative bosses/neat palace ideas: #1, #4 (boss and 1 bit of plot, the palace itself got pretty repetitive to trudge through), #6 (amazing boss, loved the fighting arena bit and palace aesthetic, but hated trudging to collect shit just so Akechi could slide us through the plot), #8 (rad design, cool 1st boss, Yaldawhoever was kinda lame to fight tho bc it was a lot of the multi-bodypart stuff we’ve seen before)

Palaces that were repetitive/annoying most of the time/lame bosses: #2, #3 (THE W O R S T BOSS AND PALACE), #4, #5, #7