#the perfect door rug does not exi–

[arctic-hands]

Date Of Origin: November 2, twenty twenty-two

Date Of Update: June fourteenth, twenty twenty-four

Stardate: ???

[Image Description: a door rug in the threshold of an open door. It's on the smallish side, and black with various fonts in various colors on it. It says:

"[First line: In white cursive] In this house [in yellow futuristic type] we believe [second line: a yellow star, a green flourish line, green sparkle, then green handwritten-like font] this is not a place of honor [green flourish line, yellow star. Third line: orange simple font] No highly esteemed deed is commemorate here [fourth line: in light gray, with three lines in an arc on each side] Nothing is valued here. [Fourth line, small white formal font] what is here is [underlined with a red arrow pointing to larger red words that say] Dangerous & Repulsive [sixth line: large light blue formal font with tildes on either side] the danger is in a particular location [seventh line: in small light purple typewriter font] (The danger is still present in your time). [Eighth line: in yellow script with a twinkle to the upper right of it] This place is best left [ninth line: in allcaps white casual font] Shunned & Uninhabited [two white stars in the upper right]" End I.D]

Gets a doormat with the This Is Not A Place Of Honor message on it so no one breaks into my home ten thousand years from now

[ratgingi]

my dialtown ocs !! click for better quality, info on them + extra flavor doodles under cut (its long be warned)

Michy Knight | she/her + pansexual, will date you regardless of head choice

- full name is michelle knight, but she usually goes by her nickname, michy (funfact: i named her michelle before finding out that was mingus' previous name lmao)

- she decorates her head with stickers but takes them off for work, so they change often

- she works at the post office and delivers telegrams on the side

- shes a very bubbly hopeless romantic, and likes to pretend she's a cupid delivering love letters

- she's incredibly social and knows a number of people in town, but does not actively have anyone she really considers a close friend

- she focuses heavily on her jobs, she adores mingus and (pre chapter 3) wants to be part of mingus' "perfect dialtown", believing doing her jobs well will guarantee that for her

- she loves to write, most specifically she writes fanfiction, and publishes them online. occasionally people she knows are featured in these under code names, most prominently of which is mingus

- she technically is aware of norm, but doesnt actually know anything about him. she found the shack while travelling in search of writing inspiration, and now she thinks hes just a hermit who needs some company, so she often sits outside his door and reads her fanfics to him

- the player meets her as a passer-by on the street in downtown while shes headed to her job, and after explaining the situation she gets excited and offers to help find a date. when her offer is accepted she becomes part of your 'party' and goes to the park with you to talk about who she thinks would be a good fit with you (this is determined by the head you have + a few dialogue options with her that show her your personality). after that she tags along with you for other character interactions

- her route is hard to get, as it only "unlocks" after the player loses all other routes she's aware of (namely: olivers, randys, karens, jacksons, and lilliths) while she is with you, after which she apologizes for being a bad cupid and offers to take you to the funfair herself instead

- in her route, you try to help her learn that it's unhealthy to hold herself to certain standards that she does all for the praise of someone she wont achieve, and help her learn that the over-glorified version of love she has in her head isnt something to prioritize over true love; that true love is mutual, and can be messy and imperfect but is just as worth pursuing

- the only other route she appears in is bigfoots (she runs into you while you're outside town hall before the mingus encounter, and asks if youre going inside. if you say you are, she offers you a package and asks that you leave it with tango at the front desk as its a gift for mingus and she's too shy to do it herself. the player instead leaves the package on the office desk after picking up the rug. ("here, i'll put this on the desk, that way it's like a trade! we're even now.")

- her route's hatchling has a lovebird for a head

Jackson Coxx | he/him + gay, will only date you with a phone head

- works at an arcade located in uptown, hes close friends with a coworker of his named exie

- he's a gym bro whos in extreme denial about his sexuality

- he has a lot of false confidence and often remarks on how strong / attractive he is

- hes pretty tall (like 6'2" when he isnt slouching)

- he has very bad fashion sense and often wears the same thing multiple days in a row

- he likes to play with the plastic bit of the case around his head's charging port when hes bored, and this as resulted in it becoming misshapen and sticking out at the bottom (his head is based on my phone irl that i do this with so ngfdkjbgk)

- the player encounters him in the apartments after approaching his door. you catch him as hes leaving his apartment and headed to the gym to work out some. a dialogue scene follows where you can ask him out; asking him out as a typewriter will result in the route-lost pop up ("Yeah, uh... You're.. okay, i guess, but not my type, sorry, haha.") and asking him out as a phone, he will quickly state that he isnt gay, and a bit of a back and forth scene will take place, by the end of which he will agree to take you to the funfair as long as its 'just as homies'

- during chapter two while looking for jackson the player heads to his place of work and meets exie, who says that he's on a smoke break out back but that she'll keep you company while you wait for him. theres a scene between the two where the player makes a comment that he must be homophobic for how much he hates the idea of being gay, and he will defend himself by saying exie is wlw and the two are very close, after which she makes the comment that jackson is also gay, and he gets annoyed with her and tells her not to lie to strangers

- in his route, the player will be teaching him to accept himself, and that its okay to be true to who you are regardless of what people around you might think or say about it, that its important to be who you are and not let the pressures of those around you change that, no matter how scary that may be

- his hatchling has a wolf for a head

Charlie Steiner | he/him + aroace, doesnt have a route

- owns a morgue on the outskirts of town (the morgue is also legally registered as a church)

- he is very full of himself and over the top (think classic funky cartoon villain), hes also incredibly good with people and loves to socialize

- he's very 'animated' when it comes to behavior, he talks with his hands a lot and constantly overexaggerates words/movement

- his head is a phone with a coffin case on it, he almost never opens it though

- he loves dressing fancy and often with a religious aesthetic, usually with big boots and long coats. hes always wearing his gloves, even when outside of the morgue

- he doesnt have a route of his own but is very very present in lilliths, so much so that his interactions even determine what endings you get. he is very protective of and close with them.

- he is the first person you meet during the morgue encounter. if you ask him out as a phone, he will say he isn't interested and that you should look elsewhere for love. when you ask him out as a typewriter, he will state he himself cannot help you, but that he has an assistant down the hall who may be able to help you

- there are two times talking with him changes your route. the first is after lillith accepts your offer for a date. while they are getting ready, the player returns to the main room in the morgue and he asks how the talk went, and after being told they accepted he requests that you allow him to secretly tag along and help him make sure lillith doesnt know, offering to give you tips during the date. telling him no results in the good end being closed off, after which you can only get one of the three 'bad' ends. the second time is during chapter two before a second date with lillith, he will again ask that you let him secretly tag along, and telling him no will set you up for the shit yourself and die end.

Lillith Morozov | they/them + lesbian, will only date you with a typewriter head

- charlie's assistant in the morgue

- unlike him, theyre very antisocial and much prefer to avoid people, spending most of their time at the morgue. they struggle to process and display emotions in a 'proper' way, and when they get over stimulated will either shut down or have a physical outburst depending on the type of emotion that caused it

- theyre mute and communicate through sign language (which shows in the dialogue box like {this}), they even taught charlie sign language and he translates it for people when needed

- their favorite hobby is preserving bugs/flowers/bones through taxidermy/pinning/jars/etc

- their head is a folding clipboard, though they usually keep the font part clipped back. whenever they get upset/feel a strong emotion in general, they 'close' their head, as it makes them feel more secure

- charlie will occasionally use their head like a normal clipboard when the two work together (they do not mind this dont worry)

- theyre technically 'petite' but are incredibly strong, usually taking the more physical jobs around the morgue

- during chapter 2, there is a little date scene with them (that you can only reach if you told charlie yes, after which he will give you a tip that you use to get the good end) where the player makes a remark that the waitress serving the two of you is cute. lillith will become closed off after this remark and once this is noticed the player will be presented with 3 options: you can continue to make comments about the waitress and pick at lillith over it (this will lead to bad end 1 where lillith essentially snaps and pickles the player lmao), you can tell lillith that theyre the only one that matters and put them on a bit of a pedestal; becoming cold/mean toward the waitress to prove it (this will lead to bad end 2 where the player tries to preserve lillith 'like a delicate flower') , or you can assure lillith that you remarking that you thought the waitress was pretty wasnt a sign they were being replaced and that you thinking someone else looked nice does not lower their value (here is where charlies tip plays in as he tells you that way of thinking is smth lillith has trouble with, and will lead to the good end)

- as you can probably tell, lillith's route is about teaching them that the opinions of those theyre close with do not immediately raise or lower their value as a person, and that its okay to struggle and be imperfect - that they and their actions have value regardless and do not need others to actively/constantly see it for it to exist

- the hatchling for lilliths route has a lamb for a head

congrats !!! u made it to the end have some doodles i made of them all

[whatmack]

UR MATTNEIL....... I MSOBBING

!!!!! AHHH had to post this rn bc it was really getting too long for how I’m formatting this series (why doth my fingers write with such long winds): have some loving neil hours in this house

——————————————-

“You’re going to be a hot mess,” Allison promises over the phone.“Thanks,” Neil says sardonically, juggling the phone to his other shoulder sohe can fit another piece into the puzzle spread over the coffee table. Andrewhas made a game of finding the most psychedelic, difficult to look at puzzleshe can and spreading them over useful surfaces. He gets bored with themquickly, so they remain half-finished unless Neil makes an effort to completethem.“You know I love you,” says Allison. “But you’ve been dating one person, sincelike, forever. You’re like a little baby bird again.”Neil’s fairly certain that’s another insult. He squints at a swirl of glitterypink and tries to see if the shape matches any of the loose pieces he’sarranged in front of him. “It’s Matt.”“Exactly,” Allison coos. “I was there when he won Dan. You have no idea whatyou’re in for, chickadee. No, Parker, down!”Rustling and barking come through the other end. Renee and Allison arefostering hypoallergenic seeing eye dogs, because Renee is a good person andAllison gets hives around anything with fur. Allison pretends she hates the work.Neil sees through her. He’s had practice.“But we already know each other,” Neil says, pushing sternly down on theanxiety rising in his chest. He tries a piece against the edge of the pinkswirl. Nope. “It’s not like we have to make a good impression.”“Just you wait,” Allison says ominously, which doesn’t help Neil’s anxiety atall.Thankfully Neil is too tired to be nervous when he gets off the plane,stumbling from the baggage claim into Dan and Matt’s waiting arms. Checkingbaggage is old hat by now, and he spares a thought to wonder at it as he letsDan sling the case protecting his Exy stick over her back and Matt take overhis carry-on. He falls asleep on Matt’s shoulder in the back seat.

He gets set up in the guest bedroom, same as usual, and it’s not until the nextmorning that Neil thinks to wonder if he should’ve expected to stay in themaster with Matt (and Dan). He flips over onto his back and stares up at thestippled ceiling. It’s not like he’s never slept beside them before, during Foxsleepovers or accidental naps on the couch. Thinking about doing the same thingnow, in this context, gives rise to a squirmy feeling that isn’t quitecomfortable. Not bad, but not good, either. He decides he’s glad he slept inthe guest bedroom this time.The smell of coffee and frying butter beckons him from the kitchen. Neil wrapshimself in a blanket (Matt likes the apartment so cold, he and Dan agree it’s terrible) and makes his way into theopen. Dan is flipping pancakes on the stove, Matt reading from his phone at thetable. Matt’s eyes light up when he sees Neil.“I was hoping I would catch you before I had to leave today! Good morning,” headds as an afterthought, scooting his chair over to leave room for Neil. Neilgrabs the open seat and sits in it crosslegged, drawing the blanket up over hishead. He makes eyes at the three mugs waiting by the coffee maker.“I’m hungry,” Matt whines, leaning back to nuzzle his face into Dan’s back. Shepokes him with the butt of the spatula, shooting Neil a look that says can you believe this guy?“You rush pancakes, you get shit pancakes,” she says. “I know how to cook onething and I’m gonna do it right. Morning, Neil. Coffee?”“Yes.”Matt has practice for most of the day (he’s apologetic, which Neil finds silly,because he’s the last person to think that’s a bad excuse), but it’s a schoolholiday so Dan stays at the apartment with Neil and her playbook. Shegravitates from the table to the couch to the floor to the table again,watching replays on her laptop and taking copious notes. There are fivedifferent pens in her hair before she starts running out of space.With the nonstop rush Neil’s life usually is, Neil is happy to take upresidence spread-eagle in the middle of the rug. He rambles on to Dan about histeammates. He flips through channels until he finds a sepia-steeped Westernmovie and decides it’s good enough. He texts Andrew, and gets back a picture ofthe new cat (whom Matt has finally decided to name “Thunderkick 3000;” Neil andAndrew usually just call him “Teddy”) hanging from a claw snagged in Andrew’sarmband. Dan calls him over for his opinion on her players, and Neil advisesher happily. Though she does keep reminding him that these are freshmen, nothis professional colleagues. Neil keeps reminding her that they’ve got to learn sometime.He doesn’t remember to be nervous until Dan points to the threadbare shirt andpair of (Andrew’s) sweatpants he’s been wearing all day and asks, “Matt’salmost home. Is that really what you’re going out in tonight?”A swift kick to the gut would make him less suddenly nauseous. Neil knows fromexperience. “I don’t know where we’re going.”“He didn’t say to dress fancy,” Dan says, propping her hands on her hips andscanning Neil from head to toe. Neil’s skin prickles. “You’ll probably be goodwith jeans. As long as they’re not fifty years old or ripped. My man’s a classyone.”“Since when?” Dan sticks out her tongue and implies something rude about Neil’s parentage,which all things considered might even be true.She is Neil’s family, though, so she cuddles him on the couch after he getschanged until Matt comes home. The rush of warm air from outside and Matt’sheavy footsteps announce him plainly, but neither of them move until Matt tipshis head over the back of the couch, shaking his sweaty headband onto Dan’sstomach. Dan picks it up and snaps it back into his face. “Ewww,” she says, grinning.“I kinda like coming home to my two favorite people,” Matt says, and whileNeil’s face goes hot he leans down to kiss Dan hello. Neil’s instinct is tolook at his feet, but their faces are in the way and so that would becounterproductive. Well, why should he? Didn’t he and Matt agree that they were going to kiss whenthey saw each other again? Habit makes Neil stop before reaching up, tucking his hands behind his back.“Do I get one too?”“Wh—oh,” Matt says, hand flying up to cover his face. “I. Not yet? Is thatokay?” His voice gets squeakier, so at the end he sounds like a cartooncharacter.“Okay,” says Neil. He starts to ask where they’re going, but Matt stops himwith a hand on his arm.“It’s not that I don’t want to,” he says. “Like. I’m totally still down withkissing. Kissing’s great!” The last time Neil saw Matt bouncing around on his feet that much, it wasbecause he had to go to the bathroom; that doesn’t fit, here.“You’re just a romantic,” Dan teases,and there’s the gut-kick again. Neil’s arms tighten around Dan. She pats him.“You good?”“Mmhm,” Neil says into the pens sticking out of her head.“We don’t have to go out tonight,” Matt says, concerned. 

 That sounds awful.“I’m good. I promise!” 

“Really? Because—”

“Shut up. Where are we going?” Neil says, quickly, before any more argumentscan come through. “Is this okay? What I’m wearing.” Dan shifts to the side soMatt can get the full view. 

“Perfect,” Matt says, all bright white teeth, and oh, Neil wants Matt to lookat him like that and say nice things about him forever. 

After a shower and change himself (“He looks hot in his uniform, doesn’t he?”Dan says to Neil, winking, and Neil feels a quiet thrill when he answers, “Yeah”),Matt slings a jacket over his shoulder and offers Neil his hand. Neil takes it,comforted by the familiar gesture. Matt smells like hair gel and soap andcologne, and Neil presses his face into Matt’s shirt in appreciation.“Drive safe,” Dan says, opening the door for them. She pecks them both on thecheek, stretching up for Matt and leaning down for Neil. “Have fun, you two.”“Don’t blow up the house when I’m not here to see,” Matt responds, and they’reoff, carried down the stairs to the parking garage on Dan’s laugh.