#the only role you know the way sealing yourself off isn't the protection it seems

[trashlie]

OMG!!!! Why did I assume that both Minhyuk and Maya knew Alyssa was related to Shinae's incident. It seems so unlikely after that Fast Pass. So, Maya doesn't like Alyssa simply because she overheard her badmouthing Shinae. And I doubt Minhyuk knows anything about the girl drama unless someone clued him in. Alyssa could've left the school without anyone ever finding out!

I am absolutely going to answer things out of order, I'm SO sorry! This one just feels most prevalent with regards to this week and last week's FP. I'm so sorry I didn't get this answered last week, but I would like to preface this with the note that you sent this to me immediately following FP ep 201, just because 202 better confirms things you brought up.

You also bring up something that I'd like to get deeper into, and I'm going to try to get a separate post going with all of that!

As usual, spoiler thoughts follow under the cut (though for once it's not very long!)

I think we all were under the impression they all knew about Alyssa's involvement and how it happened! In all the times I've ever talked about it, I certainly operated under the assumption that there were more teachers involved, that someone would have witnessed it, that there discussions with parents. But to know that Alyssa probably went home school that day and begged her parents to take her out of school and probably never told them what happened is so shocking. I've talked a lot about how I had a feeling she never really got to deal with those feelings, whether talking to a therapist or her parents, but I can't believe it's so much worse than I ever thought. Does Meg even know? I get the feeling that she does not!

Before 202, I was definitely thinking Minhyuk also didn't know, because surely if Maya, who had actually been at school, had no idea, I can't imagine word of mouth would have gotten to him, either. Something even more interesting to note is that scene where Shinae finds an Alyssa ad out while she's shopping with Maya and Maya is SO flippant about it like, hey I know she's your ex bestie and all but she SUCKED. And with what WE knew even then, it seemed like such a FRIVOLOUS comment to make about the person who pushed Shinae, didn't it? But now that we know she doesn't know THAT part, just that Alyssa was, indeed, a sucky friend who Maya thinks Shinae has no reason to miss is like... wow.

I think there's a lot we could read further into re Maya but I think I'll save that for the aforementioned post where I can gather all my thoughts together and try to be more coherent, but yes, I think that's a good summation of it. Like, even though Maya has her grudge and hadn't resolved her own feelings, I think she knew well enough as an outsider that the way Alyssa treated Shinae and acted with her was nasty and not fair to Shinae. Again, something I enjoy about this story is that there is nothing that is truly black and white. Maya may have her own grudges and doesn't like Shinae for her own reasons, but she can at the same time dislike Alyssa for how SHE acted. There's just so much depth that I really enjoy, all these layers that continue to peel away.

I think the lack of knowledge about Alyssa's involvement really affected how Minhyuk turned out in the present. I mean, to be fair, all of 201 showed us how the characters were affected and turned into the versions of themselves we met in the present, but I'll get into that a little more in that separate post, but the unknowing is probably WHY Minhyuk was so overly protective even to this day. The combination of knowing that Shinae was being bullied but her private nature and refusal to open up left him trying to answer questions that she would not. It makes so much sense now why he goes overboard in the future - he's far too used to Shinae telling him she can handle things and taking on more than she should, even before the formal. And after she finally broke and told him everything going on, all of the things she can't handle, all the ways she's been struggling with? Minhyuk finishing his classes early to hop the earliest flight home so that he can go investigate her place of work makes perfect sense and seems like a logical reaction in his place. Not to be dramatic, but the impact this one incident had on so many characters is really huge! Not only Alyssa and Shinae but Shimhan, Maya, Minhyuk, maybe even Shinae's math club teacher? What an awful incident to deal with, and when you don't have all the pieces, how do you learn to make peace with it?