#the only points on the list that i still vibe with are that his quirk is the same as his dad's (mom was quirkless)

[tiktowafel]

hi and hello i'm back from the dead here are some 1b quirk headcanons (that may or may not contradict canon but i'm too lazy to check everything)

Kuroiro

dad had a very limited phasing quirk, mom had an ink quirk. neither had #000000 skin that part kinda came out of nowhere

despite obviously being connected to his ability it's just a mutation that appeared along with it and isn't required for the quirk to be usable -what i mean by this is that Monoma's skin doesn't turn black when he copies it

it's. a really confusing quirk mechanics wise. Kuroiro himself isn't exactly sure how it works, it just does and thinking about it too hard makes his head hurt lol

he can merge into dark surfaces. doing so doesn't increase the weight of the object he's merged into. it's like he straight up disappears.

when he fully submerges himself in a shadow, he finds himself in kind of a black void in which he can move freely (without using his muscles, i think. just zooms around somehow...) and which he can leave whenever he wants through the same surface he used to enter or another one connected to it. is it some sort of super limited alternate dimension that he can enter through shadows?? PERHAPS

since he doesn't lose his clothes when he uses his quirk, he has to be able to bring objects into the darkness with him. i imagine he can do it with all things that aren't living (them being black is not necessary because it seems to work with white shoes and bracelets) and as long as they're touching him - if he lets go of an object while in a shadow, it will just fall out. therefore his quirk can be used for transporting things, but not for storing them.

you can also explain him not losing his clothes by them being mirio style dna fabric but that's the more boring option so screw that

when jumping out of a shadow, his speed matches that at which he was moving inside of it. i think it would be cool if he could build up speed while moving through a shadow and then just SHOOT out of it and kick someone real hard

Pony

Pony actually has "two quirks" - the one that gives her horns and the ability to shoot them (inherited from her dad) and the one that gives her the appearance of a horse/pony (inherited from her mom). it's registered as "horn cannon" for the same reason why Tokoyami's quirk isn't "raven" and Mina's isn't "pink alien thing" - it's a passive mutation quirk so it gets "overwritten" by horn cannon, which is more "active" - does this make sense?

thanks to her secondary quirk Pony is much stronger than the average person and can run really fast when on all fours. she can also neigh like a horse, digest celulose a bit better than average and sleep while standing. it's... not much besides that

Pony's horn cannon quirk requires keratin to function, because it's what her horns are made of. regrowing her horns too many times causes her to suffer from keratin deficiency, worsening the condition of her hair, skin, nails and hooves

most telekinetic quirks cause headaches when overused, but Pony's ability to control her horns is very minor so that drawback doesn't really affect her

Kendo

her quirk is a mix of her parents quirks - her mom can extend her fingers and her dad has superhuman strength in his arms

enlarging her hands increases their weight a lot, but Kendo's abilities don't suffer from that because her back and arms are naturally extremely strong as an adaptation to her quirk (she can beat everyone in the class at quirkless hand wrestling - it's highkey unfair, but she can)

however, she still sometimes ends up with lower back pains if she uses her quirk too much

Setsuna

her dad does have a lizard quirk (that actually gives him a tail that he's able to detach and regenerate), but her mom's quirk is actually more similar to Setsuna's. it basically lets her detach and re-attach parts of her body along predetermined lines, and lacks the regenerative abilities

her quirk makes her basically indestructible because it lets her regenerate any destroyed or injured body part, plus she seemingly doesn't even need any of her organs to be connected to each other. her only weak point is her head, attacking it is the only way to knock her out (or kill her)

her head/brain is also her "core" - she can only regenerate body parts that are connected to her brain. i'll use the final exams as an example - if she managed to get her whole head outside the gate, she would be able to regenerate her whole body around it and pass (she would probably pass out from exhaustion, but still). however if she only got some other body part, like one of her arms outside the gate she wouldn't be able to do that because the arm isn't connected to the brain. hope you get what i mean lol

in-universe, her quirk probably isn't censored with black, so i'm guessing it looks quite gory and tends to freak people out when they see it for the first time. an upside to this is that thanks to having to deal with the sight of it on a daily basis, no one in class 1-B has to worry about the shock of first seeing gruesome injuries during hero work. they're all desensitized through safe means👍

a drawback that is shared by most regeneration quirks is that due to the rapid cell division that occurs when regenerating body parts, she is at a high risk of developing cancer. however that's far less troublesome than it sounds, as she can always just painlessly detach the cancerous part and grow a new healthy one. doctors hate this one weird trick or something

as you can probably tell from my art, i really like the headcanon that her skin looks kinda patchwork-y because her regenerated pieces are never exactly the same as the original body parts

due to those imperfections, she's extra careful about her brain pieces bc it's such a complicated organ that the tiniest change in its structure can seriously mess things up. like cause memory loss or personality changes, setsuna finds that terrifying and honestly who wouldn't!!

Tsuburaba

another 50/50 mix - his mom can create colorful smoke/mist with her breath and his dad can produce a glass-like liquid from his skin and solidify it at will

i gotta admit that i'm not sure what the "solid air" actually should be. if it was actual solid air, it would be incredibly cold, unless there's some pressure fuckery happening here. and since i kind of don't understand that hypothetical pressure fuckery i generally prefer to think that it's some different substance that's a solid in normal conditions and was just named "solid air" because the way it's created makes it seem like it.

while the amount of solid air he can create does depend on his lung capacity, the quirk itself doesn't give him any extra amount of it. in other words he has the lungs of a regular athletic teenage boy, nothing special

his actual "quirk factor" is his throat, using his quirk too much first dries it up, then proceeds to damage its walls, which can result in him not being able to use his quirk for a while. throat damage due to external factors does the same thing

he can make the stuctures created with his quirk disappear at will. it's not required, but he likes to snap his fingers when doing so. makes it look cooler.

he's only ever been shown to create stationary structures, but i like to think that he can also make mobile ones (in other words i think he should be able to make solid air weapons and tools because that's cool)

Tetsutetsu

exact copy of his mom's quirk. gotta go with the joke

along with the temperature resistance, inability to regulate his hardness and dependence on iron consumption, another difference between his quirk and Kirishima's is that turning into steel also significantly increases his weight, which allows him to hit harder at the cost of slowing him down a little

the wiki says that it was never clarified what "iron consumption" means, so it's up to me to decide - i think they meant that he needs to eat food that contains iron, judging by the fact that the (stereotypically!) rich in iron spinach is his favorite food. i don't think he eats the actual metal, lol

even when his quirk is off, his hair is slightly affected by it at all times, which makes it resemble thin metal wires. he styles it by bending it with his hands

Reiko

since it's an extremely basic quirk, i think she also directly inherited it from one of her parents i don't have concepts for them so idk which one oof

she can only use her quirk on entire objects, not parts of them

while she doesn't have to always keep the objects she's manipulating in her field of view, she has to see them in order to "pick them up" in the first place

i believe that the "can only lift things that weigh less than an average person" limitation she has in canon is supposed to explain why she doesn't just use it to throw people around, and yeah that makes sense. what doesn't make sense is why she can't pull them by their clothes instead, so i'm going to make up an explanation for that too - clothes are usually pretty thin, so trying to grab them without also grabbing the person themselves and therefore exceeding the weight limit usually requires quite a lot of precision, which Reiko doesn't have (yet - one day she'll learn, i imagine)

the term "weight limit" is a simplification, it's actually a mass limit. in other words when she can't lift something it's not because can't exert a strong enough force to counteract its weight, but because she can't manipulate this much matter at once. she wouldn't be all-powerful in space or when cooperating with ochako

speaking of the force that she can apply to objects, it can be pretty insane if she concentrates hard enough for a long enough time

she doesn't actually need to move her hands to use her quirk, but it helps her focus and visualize its effect better

as it's a major telekinetic ability, overusing her quirk gives Reiko headaches

(i'm making up so many rules and limitations because telekinesis is a BROKEN ability if you think about it enough lol)

Shiozaki

mix of her dad's ability to speed up plant growth and her mom's ability to manipulate her hair

since her vines are green, it's safe to assume they contain chlorophyl and therefore are able to photosynthetize. however, due to the way they're shaped, i doubt it's very efficient (bad surface area to volume ratio), so i suppose Ibara has to provide most of the nutrients herself. in other words i think she eats way more than the average person and drinks more water, too

failing to provide those will cause her ability to extend and move her vines to suffer, and in more extreme cases, they will just fall off. she can regrow them when that happens, but it takes time.

while theirs are obviously very different from ours, plants do have senses, and Ibara can use those plant senses of her vines as kind of an extension of her own

Kamakiri

another exact copy, of his mom's quirk this time. she actually used to be a pro hero, too (one day i might elaborate on this)

it does come with the innate desire to cut things, however thanks to his mom sharing the same quirk he received proper support so it never grew into a problem. on the other hand despite seeming scary, it's not that much to handle. he just satisfies that desire by cutting vegetables lol

by default his blades are extremely sharp, but if he focuses hard enough he can make them more blunt and less lethal

unrelated to the blades, but due to part-bug biology, he's much lighter than you'd expect someone of his posture to be.

and that's it for today~ i do have thoughts about the others' quirks but i felt like they weren't coherent enough to put here lol. maybe another day? also if anything here directly contradicts canon or if you just have other ideas, you are more than welcome to share your thoughts, i really like discussing quirks :]

[rabbitsonthemoon]

MHA fic plot bunny (eraserdust-ish??? but not really???)

remember when I said I didn't /think/ I'd put any mature content on this blog? hahaha. same vibes as me thinking I'd 'just' write 20k words of a story. I mean, does it count if they don't actually do anything smutty? just that the subject is mature and has sexual themes??? Anyway I'll put it below the cut just in case, advert your eyes if it's not your cuppa.

tw: sex pollen (but not in the way you think), dubcon (in the sense that this Would Not Be Happening At All if not for the sex pollen), sexual themes, fear of noncon (due to misunderstandings), kidnapping, no smut, no romance, no feelings, kind of fuck or die but not really, Tomura is asexual in this one.

got bitten on the ankle by a plot bunny. mature rated MHA fic, partly crack treated seriously, about Shigaraki getting hit with a sex pollen-esque quirk in an attempt to weaken the LOV, except it does take asexuality into account so instead of being overwhelmed by lust and falling apart he's just. so fucking annoyed. so miserable. so done. his cock is not allowed to take that tone with him. the only relief that works for him is physical contact. cuddling and touching. except he doesn't want to touch anyone because of his quirk. he doesn't want to risk dusting one of his party members and the list of people allowed in his personal space is very. sad.

this is after Kurogiri got yoinked and before they found gigantomachia (canon who?), which might help explain why there were only one brain cell left in the LOV. They want to help Tomura, of course. He's miserable and the quirk lasts as long as a common cold if it's left to its own devices. They're also broke as hell. They really wish Kurogiri was there. He would know what to do. As far as a sabotage plot goes, quirking up Shigaraki to weaken the league is unfortunately working, just not in the intented way. he's miserable and it's everyone's problem. the itching is worse than ever and there's only so many spare shirts they're willing to rip up for bandages. point is, they're getting desperate.

and never underestimate the desperation of idiots.

they turn from looking at villains to looking at heroes. obviously it has to be an adult. which removes a hilariously sad amount of people from the pool because most of their heroic beef has been with a class of teenagers.

hey, how about their teacher? the one who erases quirks? tomura is still in absolute misery and completely misses the Signs That Something Is Amiss when he gets asked for his opinion on Eraserhead (he's still cool, wish he was a recruitable party member, his quirk would be useful).

fortunately for them, there's a feral cat hanging around their latest hideout that the whole league has been feeding, like the most poorly-kept secret. the cat is plump and trusting. heroes do things like rescue innocent animals, right?

perfect pro hero bait.

(the amount of heroes who would actually fall for this is a statistical error. Aizawa Shouta, who follows stray cats during his time off, is an anomaly and should not be counted)

cool. pro hero successfully captured. they have until he doesn't show up for his next class before the entire wrath of Yuuei and most of the underground heroics network comes down on their heads. Compress caught him in a marble. Cat was a paid actor and compensated with tuna. Cat is fatter and happier. unfortunately they have to. you know. let him out. It's a bit like trying to prepare and hype up the team to release a pissed-off lion.

cannot emphasise enough what a Terrible No Good Day this is for Aizawa. His evening plans consisted of changing into the comfiest pink sweatpants he has, finishing some grading, and falling asleep on top of the papers. This was not what he signed up for when he followed a weird little girl (disguised Toga) into an alleyway because he heard a cat and was told it needed rescuing. Now he's surrounded by the villains who attacked Class 1-A.

For the LOV, trying to explain themselves while trying to avoid getting their throats ripped out by a underground pro hero with a grudge is a WHOLE different kind of problem. they are. a lot more scared of him than he realizes. and that was before he pulled out the big knife!

In the League's defense, it never crossed their minds that getting into a four-way brawl with Eraser (Toga took a long hike with the cat) while explaining that they kidnapped him because Shigaraki's been hit with a sex pollen quirk and they ran out of options really wasn't A+ communication.

Shigaraki gets drawn to the fuss (read: they're being so fucking noisy while he's trying to sleep through the quirk) and it sure is a moment. misunderstanding cleared very fast, but Dabi is not getting those torn staples back, Twice is very grateful that his mask protected his eyes, and Spinner is Googling if mutant quirk-types can get rabies.

Eraser is suspicious as hell of the whole thing, but the ordeal sounds so stupid that he kind of believes it on principle. he's very glad that the cat is fine. the cat honestly wins more trust than any reassurance that he isn't under any obligation to stay, they just need help and couldn't think of any better way to make him hear them out than kidnapping him. still not allowed to know where he is, though, because it's a nice hideout. (Shigaraki has never come closer to dusting his own teammates.).

Because he's terrifyingly logical and efficient, Eraser is actually hearing them out + he's an absolute demon to bargain with. They get their human hot water bottle that doesn't mind being the recipient of a quirked-up Tomura's clinginess, he gets a free nap and valuable intel about the LOV's future plans and members. Probably nothing the police wouldn't have found eventually, but very neatly packaged instead of taking months to piece together. Sexual intimacy is off the table. He'll Erase Tomura's quirk if he feels threatened. The eye drops stay close by. Either of them can back out at any time. Eraser keeps his mouth shut for privacy's sake. They owe him a bottle of whiskey for the inconvenience and a fucking week of going radio silent on villain work. He wants regular updates on the cat. They keep their end of the bargain, he'll keep his.

Shigaraki would die from embarrassment if he didn't already feel like he was dying from touch starvation. Good thing Eraser is very warm and pliable (caterpillar man), and has seen far too much to be fazed by this. probably knows a thing or two about ways to alleviate the suffering caused by the quirk, like heaping on any pillows and blankets from around the hideout. It's still awkward, of course. Sleepover from hell for both of them basically. There's an inherent sort of trust you need for this that is. not fucking there. but Eraser is trustworthy. even when Tomura's body is reacting with arousal dialed up to eleven, much to his dismay. It's like a sick day. But kinky. Except communication and understanding skips the kinky. Probably the most healthy interaction he's had. (yikes).

ofccourse you can't be cuddling the enemy through a sex pollen buzz without some kind of angst! Tomura isn't going to lie around all day, and his new Erasure hero blanket is portable. You bet he's still being a restless, scratchy bastard, playing his video games, trying to pretend the league isn't hovering like flies. And sure, Eraser's job here is just to laze around for Shigaraki to cling onto, but his trauma??? adoptable??? senses are tingling. Tomura says the most fucked up little things, nestled in those long rants about enemy hitboxes and the plague of heroic society and That Ending Was Bullshit, Actually.

The LOV are running out of nails to bite. doesn't help that Eraser is observant as hell and clocking them whether they like it or not. Kidnapping a pro hero with the keenest fucking sight was A Mistake, Actually, but by now Tomura is satisfied with the arrangement and it's too late for regrets. Eraser's phone might ring, might be Mic because he had a weird feeling today was a prime day for his friend to get kidnapped by villains while looking for a cat under suspicious circumstances, or something. well. his gut wasn't wrong, but Eraser's got it handled, and he wins more trust tokens by rolling a nat 20 on deception, all good here, see you tomorrow, grab me a coffee.

I think in the end the real winner here is the cat. Nothing but a good time for that spoiled little bastard. If Eraser accidentally slightly tames the LOV like a pack of feral cats by proxy, that's entirely covered by their NDA. The quirk breaks by the next day. It's a struggle to get Eraser to leave, because he's having a very comfortable sleep for once + staying in the captivity of the LOV is marginally nicer than being the homeroom teacher of the hell class. Perils of opening your secret villain hideout to the prince of sleep.

They tempt him out with the cat.

I'm gonna write this one into a full fic. ❤️ I'm craving sweets that the bakery (Ao3) does not have!!! I'll make my own then. >:3

[roguedruid]

"Oh great druid this humble petitioner asks for your recommendations on fics you did not write but enjoyed greatly I look forward to getting your top 15."

Uhhhh Damn. Hold on. Lets seee..... I can give you eleven- in no particular order- that come to mind with a bit of searching. but questioner- I read so many fics. This is gonna be a crapshoot of fandoms, so hold on. Of Harrowed Hearts by Sable_Scribe: A Naruto fic which is sadly unfinished- but had an awesome vibe and really dives into the characterization of the Konoha 12 and their potential. It does have Naruto/Sasuke vibes- but when it last left off the slow burn was slow and Sasuke was barely realizing his emotions. The Games We Play by Ryuugi: It's posted on Spacebattles origionally- but it's been reposted a few other places. It's massive- nearly a million words. This was my first real 'Massive fic' i followed as it was updating- and my real intro to Space Battles/Sufficent Velocity as fanfic sites. Also- first Gamer fic that went *way* into the power scaling and endgame stuff. Jaune in this story escalates hard as fuck. I'm talking supernatural kung fu, elemental powers, the ability to destroy cities- And his threats are scary enough to match it. This was before Salem for most of the story- but the Grimm that show up are terrifying. Keeping on the forums real fast- Two Quests (Essentially reader driven stories) deserve to be on this list. Xander [Quest] by one Judge Mental is another of those Monolithic kind of reading experiences. it's massive- on a word count I can't even figure out- spread across like 28 threads. it starts as a simple premise- You are Alexander Harris- and you are born as the reincarnation of Ganondorf. Yeah- that Ganondorf. Things only escalate past that point- to where the last i checked we were possibly the strongest sorcerer on earth- and only 12.

"A Geeks Guide: CORE" series by Sage_of_Eyes. Again, monolithic in scope- it's a complete reimagining of the Highschool DXD mythology (yes, the ecchi novels/anime. Yes it's way deeper then it deserves. Yes, it's also metal as fuck)

Swerving back from forums:

A Drop of Poison by Angel Of Snapdragons: Naruto's Shadow Clones are fucking crazy- and if you've ever wanted to see the power fantasy of them escalating non stop- this is the good shit. Drifting by AlphaDelta1001: More Naruto- but this one has some of my favorite 'Kinda Genius' Naruto moments. It mixes up the timelines, throws in a completley revamped Chuunin exam, introduces tones of new characters- and completely revamps Naruto's methods- if you ever got bored of 'it's all Rasengan' in canon- this is definitely a suggestion.

From Fake Dreams by Third Fang: Fate Stay/Night. Supercharged. This is a bit of a controversal pick- mainly because Third Fang is one of those authors who's sense of humor is... off. Just a bit of that old school Shonen Jump Pervert vibe in the background- snarky comments and purile humor creep around the corners of his writing- but FFD is still immensly fun to read. The power creep- already high as fuck in Canon FSN- goes so high. Where recently Shirou isn't fighting Servants- But True Ancestors. Son of the Western Sea by Mac_Ceallach: If you want Percy Jackson going solo on a world-wide adventure- this is it. its after the War for New York, before the romans showed up- and Its got Percy just... being cool vibing. Hitting into other myths by accident. In contrast, if you want some true off the rocker Percy- An Impractical Guide to Godhood by Antony444 It's technically a crossover with A practical guide to Evil- but if you ever wanted to see olympus and the rest of the percy jackson verse just... implode with chaos? This is it. Flooding Hades with the flaming river- beating Ceaser in Gladatorial Events, fucking with the olympians? This goes hard. The Many Quirks Of Phantom Thievery by PsychicBeagle Persona 5, reloaded. Featuring New Game+ shenanagains, plenty of romance and memes, and puns. If you're a P5 fan, I highly reccomend it. It's Time For Another Good Idea, Bad Idea by Haurvatat: This is a weird one- for one it's Solo leveling, so it's fandom was kinda niche. on the other... It's got Cannabilism in it. But! As a Cook? this is a guilty pleasure fic. The cooking scenes are all written like Binging with Babish episodes, the humor is on point, there's actual stakes and emotions- theres closure? What more does a fic need.

[wordy-little-witch]

My brain is all over the place so I'm gonna mix n match my stuff with the only common theme being Buggy and hyperfixation.

But like. Age regression. Not the funky cool supernatural kind in fiction, the coping mechanism (I like the fiction ones too tho but for this, it's coping mechs)

Just. Buggy and Shanks both having had a frankly RIDICULOUS amount of childhood trauma and both turning to different methods to cope. Buggy got introduced to age regression both bc he already kinda sorta did t involuntarily without KNOWING and then when he brought on some people to his crew with experience in psychology and therapy for whatever reason.

He got dragged to self care hours, kicking and screaming at first and then more willingly. Turns out the "off vibes" were actually severe psychological distress, PTSD, etc. Who knew? Anyway yeah.

Cabaji, Mohji and Ritchie were the ones who were first aware of Buggy's "fuzzy episodes" as he called it. Was hard not to be in close quarters on a tiny ass ship holding three nearly grown men and a growing lion. As the crew grew, even when they got the Big Top, they were still mostly aware of things. Ritchie in particular always seemed to just... Know when Buggy was blurred out and needed a hand. Or to have smth to cuddle and pet.

Mohji actually brings it up in HIS therapy sessions without naming names. Just "hey how can I help with [x,y,z]?" There's some hums and haws before finally herspist is like "sounds like it could be anything, so I can't definitively say. Keep doing whatever has worked so far, I guess,but take care of yourself too. Maybe recommend your friend talk to a professional, like me or one of the other doctors."

Buggy is vehemently against it for a good while until he finally reaches a point that he's getting frustrated. He's scared and mad and decides he'll ACTUALLY consider it - then during one of his own sessions, he gets triggered into a panic attack, which spirals due to exhaustion into him just... clicking out. Surprise. Looks like it's happening whether he wants it or not.

Through this and subsequent meetings and experimenting, he gets told that what he's doing is a blend of regression and dissociation. They decide to try to separate thebtwo to see if maybe they can turn this from a defense to a decompression method.

Buggy still can count on one hand the number of people he trusts to know this - but it does help. He's doing... a lot better actually, with this. It doesn't fix everything, but it DOES help him stay steady enough to work on the things that need fixing. Cabaji, Mohji, Ritchie, and later Alvida are also finding themselves enjoying the time they spend together when Buggy wants or needs company. They also start picking up on some smaller things about Buggy that have turned the odd quirks and strange habits into smth more, start getting puzzle pieces to the bigger picture.

They secretly start a hit list but that's for another time.

Impel Down was an absolute hot mess, and the recovering from that and the subsequent summit war was not pretty. Just when things started coasting again on slightly smoother waters, Crocodile and Mihawk show up with the instatement of the Cross Guild.

Might just make a tag specifically for my agere stuff bc Buggy is my little blorbo and I shamelessly project on him so I may throw all my clown themed thought here

[number1villainstan]

Sending you a list of villains to stuff on the turbovirgin to megaslut scale:

Megamind, Endeavor, Shigaraki, Overhaul, Nomu, Toga, All for one, Nagant, Dabi, Kurogiri, Spinner, Palpatine Vader the grand inquisitor Dooku and fuckit why not sith obi wan as well, Jango Fett, Zhao, Ozai, Unalaq/Amon/Kuvira if you've seen Lok, Sozin Long Feng Pakku Hama

Putting a bunch of villains on the Ultimate Blorbo Chart, as my name would suggest. Alright let's fuckin do this

alright it's late and i'm using my shitty free came-with-Windows image-editing software that doesn't have a text box option for some unfathomable reason so you get my shitty computer-mouse handwriting. EXPLANATIONS UNDER THE CUT:

Megamind (written as MM): 100% Literal Angel for obvious reasons, 50% Turbovirgin because he did get with Roxanne but it's like his first relationship of any kind outside of Minion and Metroman, and his first romantic relationship period.

Endeavor (written as End): 80% War Criminal for obvious reasons, 100% Turbovirgin because--listen. I know he has four kids. But that man has never had sex in his LIFE it was all artificial insemination Hawks or All Might makes one flirty comment and he combusts on the spot

Shigaraki (written as Shi): 0% Literal Angel/War Criminal because he's in a weird superposition of being both 100% Literal Angel and 100% War Criminal so they cancel out perfectly, 45% Turbovirgin because he gives me ace vibes, so he's still a virgin but only because he's not interested in sex.

Overhaul (written as CK): 100% War Criminal for obvious reasons, 100% Megaslut because look me in the eyes and tell me the Eight Bullets aren't a harem. If he wasn't germaphobic (and the yakuza wasn't homophobic) he'd have a sexual body count as high as his murder body count. Plus extra points for aroallo swag.

Nomu (not on the chart): THERE ARE MULTIPLE NOMU AND I DON'T REMEMBER THEM ALL HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CATEGORIZE THEM

Toga (written as Toga): 90% Literal Angel because everything she ever did was justified by her being a teenage girl with a Quirk that made her literally thirsty for blood, 5% Megaslut cuz she's flirty and also a teenager but I don't think she's ever gone further than a makeout

All For One (written as AFO): 100% War Criminal for obvious reasons, 10% Turbovirgin because like Shiggy w/ the morality axis he gives me both Turbovirgin AND Megaslut vibes but they mostly cancel out

Lady Nagant (written as LN): 20% Literal Angel because she was justified but also she knows what she did and would do it again, 15% Megaslut because I feel like a) she's aspec and b) she's had sex but it's not exactly a priority.

Dabi (written as Dabi): 80% War Criminal for obvious reasons, 75% Megaslut because he gives me the vibes of someone who sells $5 blowjobs in the club bathroom but can't full on fuck because it hurts too much/his body gives out/his one-night-stands are less-than-understanding.

Kurogiri (written as KG): 10% Literal Angel because dealing with teenage Shigaraki sounds like hell and somehow Kurogiri got through it, 0% Turbovirgin/Megaslut because he knows what sex is (in detail) but has little interest in it. At least in his current form.

Spinner (written as Spi): 20% Literal Angel because he just wants to Do Good, 55% Turbovirgin because he's in the same boat as Shiggy but more awkward about it

Palpatine (written as Palp): 100% War Criminal for obvious reasons, 100% Turbovirgin because he just Does Not Seem Fuckable to me. IDK maybe someone out there wants to fuck that old man but he'd probably electrocute them before they got close. "Palpatine" and "sex" just do not belong in the same sentence.

Vader (written as Vader): 70% War Criminal for obvious reasons, 20% Turbovirgin because he's canonically fucked at least once, but it was only after he got married, and I STRONGLY doubt he ever even THOUGHT about anyone else that way. If either EU contradicts this don't tell me because I don't want to know.

The Grand Inquisitor (not on the chart): I really don't know who that is, aside from the vague notion that it's a Rebels character, and the one I'm thinking of may not be the right one so I'm playing it safe.

Dooku (written as Dooku): 80% War Criminal for obvious reasons (and not 100% because I like Chisaki too much), 100% Megaslut because now THERE'S a Fuckable Old Man

Sith!Obi-Wan Kenobi (written as S!OBK): 40% War Criminal because I can't see him being as bad as, say, Dooku, but he's a Sith and therefore still pretty bad, 100% Megaslut because obvious reasons

Jango Fett (written as JF): 15% War Criminal cuz he didn't really do all that much, 80% Turbovirgin because the only kids of his we know of are actual clones, which I have decided means that he is Simply Uninterested in fucking.

Zhao (written as Zhao): 75% War Criminal for obvious reasons, 60% Turbovirgin because it's funny

Ozai (written as Ozai): 100% War Criminal for obvious reasons, 40% Turbovirgin because--listen, I know some people think he'd be a Megaslut like Iroh, but I will hold onto my demi!Ozai headcanon until the day I die. He is Simply Uninterested in fucking right up until he gets to know Ursa properly and then feels sexual/romantic attraction and is like "HEY WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS"

LoK villains (not on the chart): sorry, it's been a while since I've seen any LoK and it didn't stick in my brain like AtLA's Fire Nation did. Didn't trust myself to make good judgements.

Sozin (written as Sozin): 100% War Criminal for obvious reasons, 90% Turbovirgin because you KNOW he spent most of his life pining after Roku

Long Feng (written as LF): 80% War Criminal for obvious reasons, 10% Megaslut because he kinda gives me slut vibes but not very strong ones.

Pakku (written as Pakku): 10% War Criminal because he's an asshole but more of a garden-variety asshole than someone like Ozai or Endeavor, 100% Turbovirgin because *gestures to the sexism*. Maybe if he and Kanna reconcile properly he'll become less of a Turbovirgin but at the beginning let's just say he is not beating the incel allegations

Hama (written as Hama): 50% War Criminal for obvious reasons, 30% Megaslut because she's definitely taken a few men her age to bed before fucking them up (rather than just fucking them lmao). Maybe this is me falling for the 'witch'/evil woman = sexually promiscuous stereotype but she's definitely not on the Turbovirgin side.

BONUS CHARACTERS (that I forgot to put onto the chart, whoops):

Ursa: 70% War Criminal because Fire Nation Princess during the war and you can't be happily married to Ozai for any period of time without being at least 50% War Criminal even if it ends unhappily, he's a real bastard4bastard type, they both are actually, and a solid 40% Megaslut. i feel like she has a Normal amount of sexuality and is very comfortable with it. at the very least she knows more about and likes sex more than her husband does lolololol

Chronostasis: 20% War Criminal because he does terrible shit but all on Chisaki's orders, he strikes me as very 'no thoughts head empty' wrt to morality. 70% Megaslut, trying very hard to get into Chisaki's pants (good luck with that with how often he cleans them)

Todoroki Fuyumi: Comes across as Turbovirgin and Literal Angel but every day she lives under Endeavor's thumb is another day she inches closer to 100% War Criminal. Likewise, I think she has this secret bad habit of sleeping with random strangers (as in I literally wrote a oneshot about it) that no one knows about. Her smile is fake her dreams are full of violence the end of her rope is near she Cannot Take Much More Of This Shit

[sir-yeehaw-paws]

Ocelot: ☠ ♦ ☼

Character Headcanons

☠ - angry/violent headcanon I think his anger is a drawn-out, simmering style. I think he might've had periods where he was more hot headed and quicker to aggravate but this simmers over time to a more deadly, devastating type of anger. Less 'general irritability' and more grabbing the reins of it and manipulating it to where it might suit. If something does anger or piss him off, you're going to know-eventually.

You can hear him act angry or disgusted/aggravated in every game (and age he's shown in) he's in. At least at certain points, but I can see him holding onto things that bother him, and unleashing them when it might have the most impact.

Violence is interesting because he's a violent sort of person, but not in a quick way. To expand, I don't think he enjoys a great deal of mess if he can help it. He's a little meticulous that way and prefers violence has a cleaner edge. Because he will do exceptionally violent things, but without a lot of hmm, how to word..gore? Involved. I think he prefers cleaner, more internal methods (IE: Needles, Electrocution, etc) things that do leave their own marks, but have significantly less bloodshed involved. *Not that I see him as being against bloodshed if it suits, but I think it's a little lower on his preference list.*

♦ - quirks/hobbies headcanon

Hobby: Big Boss (I'm kidding-not)

Hobby: Guns

Hobby: Double check to make absolutely positively sure he doesn't have an ass but then act as though he has one anyway (It's the vibes, he's seen how Kaz does it. It's all in the energy it's FINE)

Quirks: The cowboy thing he has going on is past a bit and something he genuinely enjoys/likes. He unironically loves the get up, the aesthetic, all of it. Probably has those dime store novels and old radio drama's on reels or something.

Quirks: Can't sit still. Literally cannot sit still. I think he'd enjoy reading, and probably does like it. But sitting still isn't happening. Constant motion. Military training or not. Captain Fidgety Ass (Like me fr)

☼ - appearance headcanon

He's probably decently vain, but in a subtle way. I think he takes pretty good care of how he looks *Nobody is going around in a three piece, boots with spurs, or fancy gloves and not at least having some cultivation in that*. The only time we see him shirtless is when he's A) 70 years old and B) Technically a slightly different man-Liquified, you could say. (I am so sorry I am not funny). I wonder if he just likes being in layers, or looking nice and put together (of course he also wears an open neck shirt and..scarf when he's middle aged so honestly??)

Thanks for sending in!

[blueflamerevenant]

BLOG INFO POST

This is a RP blog for a so-canon-divergent-its-basically-an-AU Dabi from mha. What's different? Glad you asked. Read down below.

First, like the bio states, Dabi is a trans woman (she/they) in this. For the sake of more storytelling potential, when starting out a new relationship with a muse, she will still be an egg. When in that state, narration will use they/them pronouns for her. If you want to start out with a post-egg Dabi, just let me know

Her backstory is much, much worse than in canon, and involves extremely heavy topics with just about every kind of abuse under the sun (yes, including that one). I won't ever RP it happening, and it will only ever be explored as backstory, and the gorier details will only ever be implied. That being said...

Her present isn't much better, and includes such topics as extremely severe restrictive eating disorders, hard drug use, alcoholism, and the aftermath of aforementioned extreme abuse. Not to mention the laundry list of other complexes, disorders, and conditions that come from having such a background and lifestyle.

Dabi will NOT recognize remorseful Endeavors, or Endeavors whose past actions align somewhat with canon, as the same person as her own Endeavor. It is, and will be treated as, a person from an entirely different universe

If your Endeavor muse has a flexible story with regard to how he treated his children, and you want my Dabi to recognize him as from her universe, you need to be comfortable with him having committed the most heinous kind of abuse possible. Sorry, this AU does not position Endeavor in a sympathetic light whatsoever

I have not kept up with the manga or anime since shortly after the reveal, and do not plan on catching up anytime soon as I am dissatisfied with the direction the story has taken, so the default state is set during that time in the story. If you want our threads to take into account information that has happened since then, you'll have to fill me in on the relevant details.

Fuck what canon said, Dabi's intelligence stat is 6/5, die mad about it

Her quirk has undergone an evolution at some point, but she is as of yet unaware of the development. The evolution being that she regenerates when exposed to freezing temperatures or making physical contact with ice. This is a slow process, and at its baseline just barely does enough to keep her alive despite the damage her habits do to her body. Yes, if given enough exposure, this could heal her scars, but that hinges on her discovering the evolution first.

RULES

Common courtesy RP rules

RP blogs only, please. Do not interact if you are a personal blog. If you have an RP sideblog, let me know before following.

I'm not mutuals only, but I'll only be inclined to go for more than a quick thread or two with mutuals. If you want a long term RP relationship, and I don't follow you back, let me know you want to be mutuals. I'll probably oblige if we vibed.

Don't use me as a resource, if you see me reblog a starter meme or otherwise and don't want to send anything in, just reblog from the source please.

I'm open to shipping, but don't force it. It has to come naturally, which in most cases is difficult, as Dabi is slow to trust and likely somewhere on the aromantic spectrum. I will not ship Dabihawks. It's just a no for me. I don't do smut, we'll have to fade to black for that. It's just not something I'm comfortable writing. I also don't do suggestive or shippy stuff with even "aged up " versions of the kids, or incest. Its a no for me.

I'm cool with crossovers, but if I'm unfamiliar with the other media, I'm gonna need a quick bio of the character and a summary of the world

ABOUT MUN

My name is Alex, I'm 32, and I use it/he pronouns (I heavily prefer it/its). I've been RPing off and on for most of my life. I had a Dabi RP blog before, at xcrematedx, but I took a long hiatus and forgot my login info, so here I am, new blog, and I got the bug again. uhhhhh thats abt it i think lol.

[allthemusic]

Week ending: 28 October 1954

Of our two songs, this week, one is pretty familiar. In fact, it's almost like I've just heard it very recently, maybe written up a blog post about it... The other, thankfully, is an unknown.

This Ole House - Billie Anthony (peaked at No. 4)

Yes, this is just a cover of Rosemary Clooney's one, complete with the same comically deep bass, and many of the same vocal stylings. It's not bad, but it's definitely not throwing anything massively new at us.

That said, the introduction does feel different, if only because it changes the instrumentation. It's just as fast here, but we've lost the saxophone, and the result is a "doo-whack-a-doo" kind of vibe that's just as goofy as the original, but much thinner and sparser, texturally. It doesn't quite hit the same vibe where you feel that too many things are going on, and changing the jumbled piano of the original for a banjo robs it of something, even as it boosts the folksy feeling.

Surprisingly, the deep voice is also less deep and rich, and Billie's voice, while good, is clearly just imitating most of Rosemary's little quirks and intonations. The result is odd - a song that's trying for American folksiness, but Billie is quite audibly not American. She's not the most Glaswegian Glaswegian ever to sing, but once you know she's Scottish you can definitely hear it. There's a charm to it, but it's a different charm to Rosemary's version.

There are also some lyrical changes that subtly change the tone of the song. Instead of asserting that our main character won't need his house, as a fact, the bass voice now asks "Ain't you gonna need this house no longer?" which makes it seem less certain. We also get less overtly religious references. Instead of fixing to "meet the saints", we learn that "he's a-gettin' ready to fade away" which I at least think sounds a lot less optimistic. Likewise, instead of a reassuringly cheeky angel peeking in, confirming to the old man that it's time, we instead hear how "he seeks a new tomorrow through a golden window pane". Which again sounds less certain to me, or certainly more ambiguous. Plus, we don't know if he finds what he's looking for! They're small changes, but I don't care for them.

So yes, I still enjoy this song, but it's not a patch on the original. And apparently the record-buying public agreed. Number 4 is still nothing to be sniffed at, but it's Rosemary at No 1 for a good reason.

There Must Be a Reason - Frankie Laine (9)

This feels like something from a film, at least in the intro. It's all brassy and slightly jazzy, building to a cinematic sort of swell before settling into something slower and smoochier. It's nice enough.

And then we get the opening lyrics, which are frankly a little inane: "There must be a reason for raindrops to fall, / There must be a reason why mountains are tall, / And why are there stars in the sky? / There must be a reason why." The stuff included just feels so obvious and cliché, and it only gets worse as the list gets longer, as Frankie asks about the reasoning behind rivers, trees, flowers, birds with wings, seasons changing, dawn breaking, etc.

At this point, I remember that Frankie's had some religious songs, and I start to fear that this is a religious song. And then, the other shoe drops: "It was intended that way". So this is going to be that kind of song. As a person who firmly believes that Frankie is onto something here - and yes, your personal mileage may vary - even I don't find this particularly compelling as a thing to sing a schlamzy pop song about. It's a bit "All things bright and beautiful", and more than a little naff.

And then, almost worse, we take a distinct turn away from the religious, towards the personal and the romantic, as Frankie sings that "There must be a reason for falling in love / It must have been planned in heaven above". He wonders how they are so in love but states that - you guessed it - "there must be a reason why". Ugh. You're better than this sap, Frankie.

I don't know why this vaguely religious start and then the turn to the secular rubs me up the wrong way so much. Maybe it's just because it's a hideously overblown way to describe a romantic relationship. Or maybe I just don't like the way that Frankie sells his more sentimental songs. Give me a good Western theme any day!

He does have the range, though. I wonder if he's our most decorated chart veteran - certainly he's the one who's got there with the most varied assortment of songs, from romantic ones, to Western themes, to chipper duets, to religious songs. It's definitely some sort of achievement.

I didn't love either of this week's songs, not going to lie. I didn't hate either of them, though - they were just unfortunate in coming along in the same week. One suffers from being a slightly inferior cover of a song whose original I really did enjoy, and only just heard recently, and the other suffers some more fundamental issues because it can't decide if it's a love song or a Sunday school talk. Still, if I have to pick...

Favourite song of the bunch: This Ole House

[bubblyhoney]

win for me

warnings: lAnGuAgE, alcohol consumption (both reader and all other characters are of age to drink), marijuana use, Making Out™️, a miniscule Flowers from 1970 reference. PSA: WHEN UR INTOXICATED AND/OR AT A PARTY, TELL UR FRIENDS WHO YOU WILL BE WITH AND WHERE YOU WILL BE AT ALL TIMES. DRINK AND PARTY SAFELY!

tags: sapnap x fem!reader

summary: a collection of moments throughout the beginning of your relationship

words: 5000

A/N: even though this isn’t my most organized or perfect fic this was so incredibly fun to write. and it’s a college!au!! one of my favs. hope you guys like!! let's pretend the pandemic doesn't exist for this one too (please wear ur masks btw)

-

Sophomore Year:

Smells like shit in here is your first thought upon entering the laundromat.

It does, in all honesty. What would you expect a place where college students wash three months of dirty clothes and comforters with vomit to smell like? Urine and just a hint of marijuana, incidentally. The door closes noisily behind you and a guy in a black baseball hat turns his head at the noise. Half of his face is hidden underneath the shadow of his scruff and he says nothing, but you still offer an obligatory polite-stranger smile. The place is pretty deserted, what for it being nearly 4 in the morning. And you’re a rare kind of customer; only a few things to wash and you brought your own detergent.

There’s an empty washer next to an old woman in an acid-trip of a parka, and you sweep past the few other patrons with your mesh bag close. The man in the hat nods at you as you pass, looking up from his phone.

Okay. Dark load in one and delicates in the other, you remind yourself. The quarters get pushed through the slot (not without dropping three and having to scramble to pick them up before they disappear between the machines) and you fill the dispensers with a flowery laundry detergent your roommates hates. Oh, and the clothes go in. Done. You relax into a cracked plastic booth around the corner of the machine, pulling a book of crosswords from your bag.

Somebody yelps halfway through filling out a five letter word (“a series of thoughts, images, and sensations occurring in a person's mind during sleep”) and you jump. Baseball Cap rips open the dryer, fumbling around and supplying a pair of gray sweatpants. You can’t help but watch. He digs through both front pockets, pulling out a wad of dollar bills. He sighs, shoves the pants back into the dryer, and starts it with a hard push.

“Gut feeling?” You ask. He looks around for a second and settles his gaze upon you. Nice eyebrows, you think.

“Yeah,” he laughs, slightly nervous. “Yeah. I wore them yesterday and just remembered I put some tip money in my pocket.” Leaning back onto the shelf behind him, he shoves his phone into his pocket and folds his arms tight to his chest.

“I feel you,” you empathize, and set down your pencil. “I washed a parking ticket with my underwear last week.”

He stutters out a laugh, nodding.

“That must’ve sucked,” he adds.

“Yeah.” You shrug. “I wasn’t going to pay it anyways, but would’ve been nice to keep it for memory’s sake.” Rubbing at your knee offhandedly, you just watch him. He’s cute. And easy to make conversation with.

“Hey, um,” he mutters and clears his throat. “Do you by chance know some guy named Karl? Tall, messy brown hair and a horrible laugh?”

You open your mouth, then close it.

“Actually—,” you start but huff out a laugh. “Yeah, he’s uh, he’s dating my roommate. Why’d you ask?”

Reaching a hand to rub at his neck, his face twists into something sheepish.

“I’ve seen you at some parties this semester. I didn’t mean to sound creepy like that— I just—yeah.” His cheeks flush pink and he looks down to the ground.

“No worries,” you say, barely even thinking. “I think I’ve seen you too. You’re in Delta Tau Delta, right?”

“Nah, nah,” he laughs. “Just got some friends in there.”

“Ah.” You nod.

The conversation falls into silence, but not uncomfortable silence. He pulls out his phone again, and you look back to the crossword in front of you. The old woman between you leaves with a humongous load of blankets and a small family leaves with a cart full of bags; now it’s just you two.

When the washer with your delicates ding you nearly jump two feet in the air. Exhaling, you set your work down and open the door.

“Shit,” you curse as two bras fall onto the tile. You reach down to get a hand on a black lace bra and hide it quickly under your elbow. A sneaker squeaks loud in the almost-empty room and you see Baseball Cap’s shoulders.

“Here.” He’s kneeling as he hands you your pink bra and you accept it, biting your lower lip.

“Thanks,” you mumbles, slightly embarrassed, and step back to shove those bras and a couple pairs of your underwear into your bag. He offers you a small smile and backs off to his own machines, humming an off-key version of Unchained Melody to himself. Your other load of laundry gets shoved right on top of your delicates.

It’s when you’re nearly out the door, bell jingling, that you think to look back.

“Hey,” you start, almost stuttering for no reason. “What’s your name?”

He turns, dark eyebrows raised.

“My—uh… My friends call me Sapnap. You can call me that too.” Rosy cheeks once again; you seem to be making him awfully nervous.

“Sapnap.” You try it in your mouth, pursing your lips. “Okay. I’ll see you around Sapnap.”

He nods, affirming your statement.

“See you around Y/N.”

It doesn’t hit you until you’re buckling your seatbelt and starting your car that you realize you didn’t tell him your name.

Perhaps he knew more about you than you thought.

Yeah, you laugh to yourself. Karl’s got a big mouth.

Junior Year:

It takes you a collective twelve minutes to go talk to him.

It’s quiet in the library, students that happen to come here to study or procrastinate few and far between the scattered tables. Your poison today is a 4 page history paper on Normandy that you’d been staring at the instructions for for days. You’d already written a bunch of, frankly, horseshit for the body, but the introduction and conclusion were throwing you for a loop.

The vibes in Ridgeback Hall were also certainly off, today more than any other day; the main help-desk was empty and everybody had to do the tedious task of locating niche textbooks themselves.

Lifting your head from the wood of the table, you squint and focus your vision on the guy in the white tee and denim jacket that had been the focus of your thoughts for minutes. He chews at the end of his pencil, mouth screwed up into a ball, and shoots daggers at the empty notebook in front of him. You’re surprised it hasn’t caught on fire yet just from his gaze.

“Sapnap!” You whisper-shout, stretching your arms across the table as if it would make him any closer. A person with purple hair jumps at your voice but turns back to their laptop. “Sapnap!” you try again, tapping two fingers on the table. His head jerks up, eyebrows furrowed and an angry expression on his face, but softens at the sight of you.

“Y/N,” he counters, equally as loud but with a smile on his face.

“What’re you doing?”

“Calculus.” He sticks his tongue out, making an awfully tortured face. You laugh and wave your fingers at him, gesturing for him to come closer. He just huffs out a sigh, stacks all his papers in one pile, and gets up. The trek over to your table is short but he takes it so slowly you wonder if he always walks like that. Like a varsity basketball player who just got off a horse.

“You’re so slow.”

“Shut up,” he grumbles and settles into a chair across from you. “It’s 2 pm, give me a break. I need a Redbull.”

“Those are bad for you, you know,” you say matter-of-factly and drop your chin onto your hand. He’s even cuter from this angle, you think briefly. He just rolls his eyes.

“Whatever, Miss I’d-like-some-coffee-with-my-sugar-and-cream,” he teases, pointing to your venti iced coffee. It’s about as pale as the color of a band-aid. You just sigh and close your eyes. “You tired?” He flips his pencil in his hand and leans back into the seat, sighing.

“Yeah,” you mumble. “I haven’t slept yet today.”

“Wow, you’re dumb.” He looks scandalized. You just shrug.

“Perhaps. I don’t really know why I did it actually— just for funzies!” You raise an arm but let it drop back down. “I stayed up playing Sims.”

“Feel that. I play Minecraft with my buddies until like 2 am every night too. It’s nice,” he decides and folds his arms across his chest. Your eyes flit over to his strong arms, admiring the way his denim shirt looks around them. Thick.

“Do you have a girlfriend?”

“What?” He says too loudly and it warrants a ‘shush’ from another student. He reddens, but looks back down to you. “I—why do you ask?” You shrug, eyebrows raised.

“Just wondering. You’re too cute to not have one.”

“Right,” he huffs, but his cheeks stay pink. You two fall into easy silence, his eyes trained on the notebook in front of him and yours closed peacefully. “Are you dating anyone?”

They snap open not-so-peacefully.

“Nope. You wanna submit a boyfriend application?” A smile cracks your lips and he grins back.

“Maybe,” he replies and stares at your mouth. “I have to say—,” He stretches into a yawn. “I think I’m qualified.”

“Oh, yeah?” Your eyebrow quirks. “And why are you so qualified?”

“Well, first of all, I work at Ace Hardware. That’s where cool people work.” He presses one finger into his palm. Then two. “And I have a bunch of free time because said job at Ace Hardware only likes scheduling me in the mornings. Plus, I’m hot.” He shrugs.

You nod faux-seriously, considering his list.

“Those are very good qualities, sir. I’ll have to get back to you on that.” You pause. “Okay, I’ll schedule an interview. How’s 7 pm at the Chili’s on Main? Chili’s is the designated interview place.” You wiggle your eyebrows. He just smiles at you, shaking his head in disbelief.

“That was smooth.”

“Yeah, I know.” You carefully study your nails. “I’m pretty impressive.”

“Clearly,” he mutters and chuckles. “But I do like their salsa. And margaritas. We got a deal?” He holds out a large hand. You take it, squeezing tightly.

“Hell yes.”

When you see the man called Sapnap a week later, you are very obviously in a different state of mind.

Same state, same college town, but very different blood alcohol contents.

“Sappy!” You shout, raising your arms above your head with a stupid grin on your face. He turns, that familiar look of surprise evident in his expression.

“Y/N,” he laughs and approaches your group of friends in the kitchen. It’s Greek Wedding night at Delta Tau Delta, and you assume Sapnap came to support Delta’s “groom” Alex. You’d gotten uncharacteristically drunk, trading air for sangria, and you were now in the incredible stage where everyone was both your friend and your favorite person.

Throwing an arm around his shoulders, you mash your face into his bicep and giggle.

“Missed you so much,” you try to manage out of your mouth, but it comes out slurred and stuttered. “So much.” You’d gone to Chili’s two days before and promised another ‘interview’ in the next few days, but it felt like two months away from your beloved. Beloved friend, that is. Only one date.

“Yeah?” He places a hesitant hand on your back and nudges you into a standing position. “How much have you had to drink?”

“Oh, shhhh,” you mumble and close your eyes. “Only— a lot.” Blinking them back open, you zero your gaze in on a bottle of Ciroc half-empty and looking very tempting on the kitchen island across from where you’re leaned up against the kitchen sink. He catches your gaze and steps in front of you, pleasant face filling your vision. You gasp.

“You are so cute.” Sliding your palms up onto his face, you hold his scruffy cheeks in your hands and smile all dopey at him.

“Is that your brain or the alcohol telling you that?”

“Uh,” you swallow. “Both. And my heart.”

He just shakes his head and his chest moves with a heavy laugh.

“Glad to hear it.”

“Are you having fun?” You ask, all concerned and furrowed eyebrows. You look like you’re genuinely interested and worried about if he’s having a good time or not, and it makes his expression melt.

“I’m having lots of fun,” he passes over his shoulder as he flips on the tap and fills a red solo cup with water. “In fact, I’m gonna have a nice, cold glass of water right now.” He shakes it like an owner offering their dog a treat.

You eye the cup in his hand, having half a thought that this might be some sort of backwards psychology move. The other half wins.

“That sounds so good right now— can I drink some?” Your eyebrows pull together and your bottom lip drops into a pout. It makes him blink for a second. He remembers the little game you’re playing and just hands it over, smug. You gulp it down quickly and crush the empty plastic into your palm with an exaggerated exhale. “Hit the spot,” you sigh, and pat your stomach fondly.

“You hungry?” Sapnap asks you as he steadies you with two hands on your shoulders. Something pops into your head at his words: a set of two McChickens and an Oreo milkshake.

“Oh my God,” you gasp, and mirror him by placing your hands on his shoulders. “Can we go to McDonald’s?”

He just shakes his head, grin wide on his lips, and shrugs. Perfect teeth, you think.

“I haven’t drank anything, so I’m good to drive.” He pulls his keys from his pocket. “I know you’re smashed right now so—do you feel safe with me?” The question falls from his mouth and you truly consider it, pulling your lip between your teeth.

“Yeah. I’ll take this just in case,” you say, and take a large dinner fork from the counter next to you. It has some red liquid on it that you brush off onto the fabric of your jeans.

“That’s actually gross.”

“Yeah.” You grip it tighter in your head. “But it’ll do the job if you try any shit. I’ll put this in your eyeball.” Brandishing it, a smile stretches onto your mouth. He just shakes his head and heads for the back door, jerking a hand in your direction to get you to follow him.

The cool night air explodes on your face when you step onto the porch and it makes you blink rapidly. Sapnap is right at your side, offering a forearm as you slowly make your way down the two back porch steps. A tall blonde smoking half of a blunt makes a grunt noise as you two pass and your knight-in-shining armor looks up.

“Gonna go get some food. Want anything?” Sapnap stops on the rocky path to the sidewalk, tilted up to hear the blonde’s response. The other guy shakes his head but nods to you in passing.

“I’ll tell her friends where she went,” says the blonde, and disappears through the sliding glass doors.

Your hand falls from his forearm to his hand and grasps it tightly, swinging back and forth as you stumble to his car. You flash him a grin that he just chuckles at.

“Watch your step,” he warns as you yank on the handle of the passenger door and nearly fall off of the curb.

“I’m fine,” you huff, and scramble to get yourself upright into the seat and buckled. He closes your door and jogs to the driver’s seat, climbing in and starting the engine quicker than your head comprehends.

The small space fills with the sound of Letters to Cleo as he’s maneuvering out of his parking spot and he slaps a hand at the stereo button almost immediately. His cheeks redden as he glances at you once.

“I love Letters to Cleo,” you admit, and switch it back on. Ah, Co-Pilot. A classic. “Be my co-pilot!” You sing, loud and sharp. He shakes his head but huffs out a reluctant laugh.

“My older sister loved them. Bit old for my taste, but—you know. Can’t deny that I love a little bit of 90’s angst.”

“Absolutely,” you nod vigorously and pick at your nail. “Oh!” The fork magically reappears at your side and you grab at it. “For my McChickens.”

“And for me,” he adds.

“Yup. You too.” But you drop it onto the seat and lean forward, fumbling with the volume dial until you feel the lead singer’s voice thumping into your heart. “I love this lady!” You shout and rock your head to the beat.

Shaking his head, his shoulders move in an easy laugh. The drive-thru line is kind of busy for 2 am, he notes, pulling in right behind a navy BMW sedan. But it moves quickly, especially when you’re moving in your seat, scream-singing the lyrics to I Want You To Want Me.

“Yeah,” he says, loud into the mic. “Two.”

“Alright.” The voice reports from the speaker, a background clicking joining their bored tone. “Two McChickens, a double cheeseburger—ketchup and pickle only— , a medium fry, and an Oreo McFlurry. Anything else, sir?”

Sapnap chews on his lip, and glances at you. You just give an encouraging thumbs up.

“That’ll be all,” he reports.

“Second window, and your total is $9.67.”

He barely has time to call a “thank you so much!” before the line ends with a click. Rude.

“Jesus Christ,” you moan the second you sink your teeth into your first sandwich.

“Agreed,” he mumbles and pushes as much cheeseburger he can fit into his mouth.

“This,” you start, swallowing. “is the sexiest thing I’ve encountered in all of my years. I thank all higher powers when I consume McChickens…” Trailing off for dramatic effect, you stare down the sandwich before mimicking a dinosaur war cry and practically shoving it down your throat. He just nods in agreement.

“It’s so nice out tonight,” Sapnap comments, swinging a look out his rolled-down window. He parked right in front of the Campus Quad, large bubbling fountain the show to your dinner. And some geese fighting each other for half a rotting hot dog.

“Mhm.” You crumple up your wrapper trash and toss it into the empty paper bag. “Could totally go for a swim.”

He turns and gives you a look. You look right back.

“Should we?” It’s barely a question.

“Um, hell yes,” is all it takes for you to say before you’re clambering out of the car and starting for the fountain. He follows closely after, jogging to catch up with your borderline track-star sprints.

“Wait up!” He calls as you reach the border of the fountain.

“Ugh,” you sigh, impatient. “Hurry up.”

“Mouthy,” he grumbles before kicking off his shoes and bending to fold his pants up over his knees. You just climb straight in and brave the cold.

Squealing, you hop from one foot to the other, shoulders tight as you get used to the freezing water. He laughs and climbs in right beside you.

“Shit,” he curses, and shivers. “This sucks.”

“You suck,” you quip right back and splash around. He stares, disgusted, at the water soaking up your jeans all the way up to your knees.

“You’re gross for wearing jeans in a fountain. That’s worse than wet socks.” He starts to move around as feeling comes back into his toes.

“What, would you prefer me taking my pants off?” A sassy look paints your face and he rolls his eyes.

“No, but you could’ve folded them up like a normal person.”

“I think you forget,” you start, and splash a palmful of water his way. “I’m quirky.”

He gasps, face twisting as the water hits his thighs.

“You’re dead.”

If campus police were patrolling the Quad right now, they’d see two college juniors wading around in a fountain, water up to their knees, having a competition to see who can inflict the most damage. He won, it seems, because your shirt is drenched all the way up to your ribs.

“Okay!” You shout, hands spread to brace yourself. The water in his palm falls. “I’m cold and I want my other McChicken.”

“Fine,” he sighs, and with some difficulty manages to get out of the fountain and back into his shoes. You just make your way back over to his car barefoot, braving the mulch and poorly-sanded concrete.

You both finish your food quickly, discussing menial things like how fast food restaurants always skimp on the pickles and how it’s truly a disservice to the world that so many people don’t know it’s Biggie singing the song Kat dances on the table to in the 1999 classic 10 Things I Hate About You.

When Sapnap pulls up to your house, he shifts the car into park and lets loose a heavy sigh. You whip around, hand on your buckle, and sport a very confused look on your face.

“I’m tired,” is all he says. Head falling onto the seat, he rolls over to give you a half-lidded look. You nod empathetically and climb very carefully out of his passenger seat. Your drunk muscles haven't caught up to your mainly sober brain, which is impairing your ability to look like a functioning human being.

“Thank you for tonight,” you chirp, smiling in at him with your arms folded on the open window sill. The half-drank Oreo McFlurry is lukewarm in your hand. He stares at your flushed lips.

“Anytime you want a drunk McChicken let me know.” He winks. “I have a gift card.”

“You spoil me,” you coo, and step up onto the sidewalk. “I’ll see you sometime soon, yeah?”

He nods, pursed lips fighting a grin.

Cute, you both think at the same time.

Sometime soon, somehow, means the very next day.

It’s breezy yet uncharacteristically hot out, and certainly way too bright for a hungover Y/N.

You’re sat on the porch swing, nursing a hot decaf coffee with lots of sugar and cream. Sunglasses sit comfortably on your nose, but you still have to squint. The pills you took have yet to kick in, so all you have to do is wait and try not to vomit into your mug. Suddenly, your phone lights up and buzzes to life. You press the green button and lift to your ear.

“What do you want?” Your voice is awfully froggy, you realize, and clear your throat.

“Good morning to you too.” Sapnap’s voice rings clear yet husky into your ear. The corners of your lips twitch up into a smile. God, you’re whipped just for the sound of his voice.

“It is definitely not a good morning,” you grumble and switch him into speaker phone. You drop the phone into your lap and stretch out further on the swing.

“Good morning for me,” he chirps cheerfully. “Take anything for the headache?”

“Yes,” you report, sounding like a pouting child and rubbing two fingers into your temple. “Some idiot fed me ice cream last night so this morning I woke up having to both shit and throw up.”

“Aww,” he sympathizes, sounding way too entertained. “That sounds like a you problem.” You stuck out your tongue, but upon realizing he can’t see it, make a ‘hmph’ noise into the mic. “Anyways. I called to see if you wanted to go get breakfast with me. Waffle House, specifically.” You make a face but lift yourself up off the swing, wincing.

“I saw a rat eat an entire piece of french toast there once. But—sure. I’ll pay.” He starts to whine, but you scoff. “Let me love you, bitch. You pay for my McDonald’s and I pay for your pancakes. Easy trade.”

“Whatever. See you in five.” He hangs up right as you twist the front door open and drop your phone onto the couch.

“Who’re you talking to?” comes from the kitchen and you jump, pressing a hand to your chest. A shirtless Karl enters the living room with a bowl of fruit loops in his hand.

“Jesus Christ,” you breathe, and duck into the hall closet for your pair of dirty tennis shoes. “I was talking to Sapnap.”

“Oh,” he says around his mouthful of cereal with a grin. “You guys dating yet?”

You pass him a weird look, bending to tie your shoes.

“Gimme like two weeks. I’ll have him at my beck and call,” you laugh and collapse back into the couch.

“I’ll believe it when I see it.” He quirks an eyebrow and exits stage left into your roommate’s room.

The few minutes it takes for Sapnap to come to your house are short but filled with contemplation. Do you really want to date him? He’s certainly cute enough. Nice enough. And smart enough. He seems to like you too—

A honk interrupts your thoughts. Always having to be obnoxious, huh?

“You’re annoying,” you mumble as you buckle your seatbelt. He just shrugs, tiny smile tugging his lips, and shifts into drive. The short trip to Waffle House proves more quiet than lively. He seems awake, actually, so you attribute the silence to your tumultuous thoughts. The music is nice, though. Bikini Kill is perfect for 10 am.

After you two order (three chocolate chip pancakes for him and two regular waffles with a side of hashbrowns for you), he finally breaks the silence.

“Hey, are we dating?”

You pause with your lip on the rim of your orange juice. Your gaze falls from his lips to his fingers wrapped around the coffee mug. Two silver rings adorn both his middle fingers and they glint underneath the fluorescent lights.

“Do you wanna?” You squint back up at him. The tips of his ears flush pink.

“I-uh… Yeah. Yes,” he says simply. You try to hide a smile, but realize there’s no point.

“Okay.” You take a long drink of your orange juice. “I really like you. A lot. A surprising amount, actually; I haven’t really dated seriously since highschool.”

He nods, shuffling his feet on the tile. What else does he have to be nervous about? you wonder.

“I’ve… kindasortamaybelikedyousincesophmoreyear,” he mumbles and you swallow.

“Huh?” Leaning forward, you set your glass down.

“Um,” he starts but doesn’t finish.

“Did you say you’ve liked me since sophomore year?”

“...Maybe.” His coffee becomes the most interesting thing in the world, apparently. “Do you remember that one time during the Summer Carnival where Karl lost his phone?”

“Uh—yes! Yeah, actually. I do remember that. He found it in the porta-potty. What about it?” The waitress sets down both your plates in front of you and you offer her a smile in thanks before she trundles off to the drink station. You pick up your fork and wait for him to continue.

“I left two hours early because you invited Michael from your computer science class.” You pause around your mouthful of potato and he just stares back, trying not to grin. “Yeah. I thought you were hot and left early because you brought another guy.”

“Michael is gay,” you say slowly.

“Yup.” He nods and shoves a forkful of pancake into his mouth. “Isn’t that so stupid?”

“So stupid,” you tease but your cheeks blush pink.

“Anyways. Now I’m dating you, so. Win for me.”

“Ditto,” you murmur, and manage to fit half of your first waffle into your mouth. “This is the easiest it’s ever been to start dating someone.”

“It’s ‘cause we’re cool, I’m pretty sure,” comes from a mouthful of pancake.

“That’s facts.”

The rest of Pancake House is bustling, a few families with young kids and some other hungover college students scarfing down similar breakfast foods and confections. You two barely give any other customers the time of day, too wrapped up in conversation and each other. The waitress gets a heavy tip after an hour and a half of struggling to swallow dough soaked in syrup and chocolate.

Sapnap walks you to your door after breakfast, hand on your waist and pressed to your side. It feels good. Right.

“I’ll see you Wednesday right?” You ask, turning to him with hopeful eyes. How could he resist?

“Definitely. Wouldn’t miss Game Night for the world— I can’t wait to beat your ass at Uno.”

“You’re insufferable, you know that?” You murmur but you’re already slinging an arm around his shoulder and bringing his mouth down to yours.

You taste like sugar, he thinks. His hands find the small of your back easily, pressing you further forward into him. You hum at that, tracking a hand up the back of his neck and into his hair to grip it between your fingers.

He smells both musky and sweet and cool at the same time: heaven. One of his hands slides up to grip at your neck, thumb rubbing at your jaw, and you make a pleased noise into his mouth. There it is.

“Y/N!” Shrieks from inside your house and you jump, pulling away from Sapnap with a smack.

“What?” You yell back, irritated, and he just laughs as he dips to press a kiss to your cheek.

“Stop tonguing your boyfriend and come help me with my photography project.”

“God damn it,” you sigh and drop your hands. His slide down to just rest on your hips, comfortable. “I have to go.” You're annoyed, that’s for sure, and he prays you aren’t too mean to your roommate.

“Alright.” He dips for a quick kiss one last time. Okay, two more times. Maybe three. But he pulls away, grinning. “I’ll see you Wednesday.”

And then he’s stepping off your porch, walking to his car with his hands in his pockets. You watch his back fondly.

God, boyfriend. He’s your boyfriend. Boynap. Sapfriend. You can’t decide on a name, but all sounds perfect.

Perfectly him.

-

A/N: ask or send me some stuff!! requests, rants, anything. :D comments = welcome!

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 308: VIBE: CHECKED

Previously on BnHA: Lots and lots of Shindou idk what else to tell you.

Today on BnHA: Tired Nomad Deku rescues Shindou from Muscular, and us from Shindou. Muscular is all “OH BOY I SURE CAN’T WAIT TO FIGHT DEKU AGAIN AFTER HE TOTALLY KICKED MY ASS THE LAST TIME!! I’M SURE THIS TIME WILL GO DIFFERENTLY SEEING AS HE’S HAD ALMOST AN ENTIRE YEAR’S WORTH OF ADDITIONAL TRAINING, AND ALSO HAS SIX FOURQUIRKS NOW, IN ADDITION TO THE CONFIDENCE THAT COMES WITH HAVING EIGHT OTHER PEOPLE’S SOULS CHILLING OUT INSIDE HIM OFFERING MORAL SUPPORT AND ENCOURAGEMENT.” Deku is all, “[kicks Muscular’s ass effortlessly].” Muscular is all, “[gets his ass totally kicked].” I for one am very satisfied with this, and with respect to all, I would like to hereby declare this post a discourse-free zone. I’m just happy to see my son out here making good use of his FOURQUIRKS, and more importantly beating Muscular in less than seventeen pages so we can all go on with our lives lol.

damn Deku since when were you allowed to look this cool

from this perspective and with the smoke, cape, backpack, and mask more or less obscuring his actual profile, he looks less like a sixteen-year-old boy and more like a grownass man

OH SNAP

we got a glimpse of this in the cleaned-up scan of 307, but seeing both of his eyes looking so distinctively All Might-esque here is... whoa. I mean we know that his face still looks pretty normal underneath the mask and he doesn’t actually have the black sclera, but still, this is an awesome look. mini-Might

lol Muscular

you and me both. I mean no offense, but yeah

so Deku is just standing there silently

typical Deku. tight-lipped and expressionless. mum’s the word. quiet as a mouse. silent as a grave

okay no but seriously this is so weird and creepy though you guys. Deku please say something or else I’m just gonna mindlessly say whatever stupid things come into my head in an effort to make things less awkward

so Muscular is all “I should probably make a cool speech about revenge but Horikoshi couldn’t think of anything good so I’m just going to stand here clenching my fist real slowly”

“I’m not here to go on a monologue” he says, as he monologues about not monologuing

okay you guys I confess I have only read through/watched the Deku VS Muscular fight once because the arm-breaking is just way too uncomfortable for me to revisit. and so as a result, I have completely forgotten Whatever The Deal Is with Muscular’s eye lmao so let me go look it up real quick

okay so it’s a prosthetic, obviously, and he changes it out according to his mood. that part does sound familiar. I just can’t remember which eye is supposed to indicate which mood. don’t tell me I actually have to go back and reread this shit

lol I’m skimming through chapter 75 now and remembering/realizing that I hardly paid any attention to this the first time around because as soon as I found out the villains were after Kacchan my brain was like “TIME TO FOCUS ON THIS AND ONLY THIS NOW AND FOREVER” and yeah. ah memories

anyway so he started out with the flower-looking eye, and then later on he was all

which begs the question, how on earth could I have ever forgotten the most ridiculous panel I’ve ever read lmao

anyway, but so after all of that, I'm only just now realizing that this isn't one of his previous eye prosthetics in the current chapter; this is an ACTUAL FUCKING ROCK that he's just randomly shoved into his eye socket fkdsjlk

so basically (1) I did all of that painstaking research for nothing, five whole minutes of my life wasted THANKS A LOT, and (2) what, and I have never meant this more emphatically, THE FUCK

anyway so now he's leaping at the building that Deku is standing on top of. but he’s not aiming anywhere near Deku though, wtf

(ETA: HAHA YOU BROKE ALL YOUR MUSCLES YOU LOSER.)

...huh

lmao okay then. I hope those annoying citizens in the building next door are watching this go down and rethinking their life choices

dlkdkljk

just keep standing there pressed right up against the window, why don’t you. “WHAT’S GOING ON THIS SUPER CLOSE COLLAPSING BUILDING IS BLOCKING OUR VIEW.” well, folks, we’ve long since known there’s a critical shortage of hero and villain brain cells, but what we’re learning now is that civilian brain cells are also in short supply

OH THANK GOD DEKU IS FINALLY TALKING THAT WAS ACTUALLY UNSETTLING AS FUCK

SO HE’S STILL OUR GOOD, POLITE, WORRIED, CONSIDERATE DEKU UNDERNEATH THAT COOL AND MYSTERIOUS VENEER. for real, thank fuck, because I swear to god if he suddenly started acting like the Dekus in all of the vigilante AUs my interest in this series would have dropped something like 50% lol. just because he dropped out of school and ran away from home and is currently dressed like the physical manifestation of a Linkin Park playlist doesn’t mean he’s not still the WORLD’S BIGGEST DORK okay

I MEAN, THIS RIGHT HERE. THIS IS WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT. HE’S APOLOGIZING FOR THE DELAY

PLEASE FIND THE ATTACHED SHINDOU YOU REQUESTED. BEST REGARDS!!!

OH MY GOD WHY IS HE SUCH A BADASS

something about making bold, confident statements while obscured in smoke?? idk but damn it fucking works

ffjkkl

more importantly, should you tell him you actually need your copy of Shindou in excel format and not pdf?? on the one hand you don’t want to sound ungrateful, but on the other hand what are you even supposed to do with this

this chapter so far consists of like 50% smoke, but on the other hand Deku VS Kacchan 2 had a lot of cinematic smoke too so who am I to complain

OMG IS IT HIS ARMS

IDK DID YOU?! TELL ME YOUR SECRETS. PLEASE, AT SOME POINT THIS FIGHT HAS GOT TO ACTUALLY ADVANCE THE PLOT

OHHHHHHH

IT’S EN’S QUIRK!! OH MY GOD OKAY THAT’S ACTUALLY AWESOME

I CAN HEAR THE SOUND OF DISCOURSE RUMBLING IN THE BACKGROUND BUT I DON’T CARE LOL. WON’T CATCH ME EVER SAYING NO TO ANOTHER SIXQUIRK. GO AHEAD, BRING THEM ON, I WANT TO SEE THEM ALL but take it easy though Deku. don’t want to give yourself lung cancer or anything

also it’s good to see that in a very real sense he’s not fighting alone. the Vestiges really did mean it when they said they could appear more easily now. this is on a whole other level

so is this whole next page still En talking, or someone else? because whoever it is sure is chatty

okay, several things

pretty sure it is En, because he keeps saying “I suppose.” for someone who never said two words until one page ago, this guy sure never shuts up. we can’t all follow Muscular’s lead I suppose. oh my god now I’m doing it too

really like the suggestion of Deku using the SIXQUIRKS like tools in an arsenal, because that’s what he’s good at! it’s almost like he’s been training for this his entire life. “you value quirks too much” LOOK HE JUST THINKS THEY’RE COOL OKAY IS THAT A CRIME

where the fuck did all this rope come from

not gonna ask what the fuck that thing is sticking out from the back of his utility belt. Horikoshi will surely explain this

is that a fucking jetpack. I’m sorry Deku were six fucking quirks not enough for you. you can fucking float??? but JUST TO BE SAFE, LET’S STRAP A PAIR OF ROCKETS TO OUR SHOULDERS IDK

-- or wait, is this all supposed to be like a visual representation of En’s metaphor?? OH MY GOD AM I JUST STUPID LOL, DON’T ANSWER THAT. NEVER MIND. NEW LIST!!

rope = blackwhip

jetpack = float

radio = danger sense

and so I’m guessing that this ridiculously phallic thing is supposed to be a flare or something?? and that = the new quirk, smokescreen. well that was a fucking ride lmao we now return you to our regularly scheduled chapter

so now Deku is floating to his heart’s content and thinking that he’ll just sneak up on Muscular and vibe check his ass or whatever

WOOOOOOOO DANGER SENSE YESSSS I LOVE THIS FOR HIM

okay guys, I'm gonna press pause here for a sec to make a serious note, because I am loving the shit out of this, but tbh I'm having trouble enjoying it as much as I want to because I keep getting anxious thinking about the discourse. I know that a lot of the fandom has very strong opinions on Deku's character development one way or the other, and I want to respect that. but I also really have no spoons to debate this topic at all beyond what I’ve already weighed in on. so if it’s all the same to everyone, I plan on staying out of this discussion, at least this week

anyway! that said, YEAH BOI GET HIS ASS

VIBE: CHECKED. CURB: STOMPED. HOTEL: TRIVAGO

-- OF COURSE HE’S STILL FUCKING FINE LOL HE CRASHES INTO BUILDINGS FOR FUN IDK WHAT I WAS EXPECTING

dammit Muscular. how many fucking quirks does it take to beat you?! the annoying thing is that even with all of his cool new powers, Deku is still something of a mismatch against him. anyway r.i.p. to all these poor buildings

OOOOOHHHHH

you guys have no idea how intrigued I am at the prospect of watching Deku try to play both good cop and bad cop here lmao

anyway so Muscular says he doesn’t know, go figure

“I’m not here to make small talk or anything” he says as he small talks about not small talking

OH MY GOD DEKU

are you really gonna talk no jutsu all of these villains from now on?? that last battle really did have a profound impact on you, huh! interesting

you guys he’s really doing it omg

Deku this guy tried to murder a five-year-old literally just for fun. I mean more power to you, but holy shit you’re really gonna try to defeat Muscular with anger management therapy huh

I MEAN

WHO COULD HAVE SEEN THAT RESPONSE COMING dlkjslkjk

FUCK’S SAKE DEKU, I KNOW YOU MEAN WELL BUT THEY CAN’T ALL HAVE TRAGIC PASTS KIDDO

but. I have to admit, I do still like that he tried. probably knew just as well as we did what the end result was going to be, but still. he made the effort in good faith and I respect that

uh oh

why do I get the feeling Muscular just got a whole lot deader

oh my god oh my god he’s doing the “powering up” stance ffff don’t fucking tell me you can still use your fucking arms here, Deku

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY WHAT’S THIS??

okay so basically he’s saying that whatever it was he sensed in Tomura, he doesn’t sense from Muscular. which, yeah, that sounds exactly right. good judge of character here lol

AHHHHAHAHA YESS

WHOOPS, GET FUCKED I GUESS

WOOOOHOOOOOOOO

lmao so apparently this is the belated result of Shindou’s attack from chapter 307?? I’ll be damned. good for you Shindou!! I always liked you buddy. please just take my word on that and don’t fact check that statement

okay lol the one tiny bit of discourse I will allow is that it’s bullshit that he just did that with his right arm. like, I’ll fully acknowledge that. that makes no fucking sense, and I demand an explanation from the Great Plot Hole Filler himself. he’s never let us down before when it comes to continuity so I’m trusting him not to suddenly start now

that said, we love to see a rematch against a boring guy settled quickly and decisively within the span of a single chapter. THANK YOU

I like that Deku implies that his power is being a smart nerd who battles villains using the power of ANALYTICS. he basically didn’t do anything except restrain Muscular and wait for Shindou’s attack to take effect while halfheartedly checking to see if he regretted any of that murder and stuff

(ETA: and almost forgot to mention, he made excellent use of all four of his active SIXQUIRKS. it’s like the chapter title said; this is basically him fighting all-out, and it’s a sight to see.)

also, as cool as the mask was, this just feels right. like, we had our fun, now let us see his face, yes good

anyway, I think this was a good start towards establishing What’s Up With Deku Right Now! so if it’s all the same to Horikoshi, I would next like to take some time to explore Why’s Up With Deku. that, and What’s Up With Everyone Else, Especially Kacchan. por favor

[wheelsup]

the taming of the shrew | one

he is more a shrew than she

penelope reveals her plan to get you and spencer together. unfortunately, her plan has a few hitches. 

A/N: again, big thanks to @homoose for being my helpful beta reader, and to YOU for reading it now. 

category: fluff, spencer reid x fem!reader, series

wc: 4.1k

<- prev | next ->

Penelope came back to your place the following night, bearing a new bottle of wine and a collection of materials she mentioned were integral to executing the plan.

Very quickly into Penelope’s explanation of this Genius Plan –– her words, not yours –– you remembered what it was she did for work. Officially, she was some sort of technical computer-y person for the Federal Bureau. As you knew her, she’s a danger to society and anyone with a traceable digital presence.

She managed to construct a comprehensive list of every place in D.C. and Virginia that her friend liked going to, along with the approximate times in which you were most likely to find him there. Approximate meaning, exactly which days he visits and the roughly time of day, down to a mere one hour margin of error.

You scanned the list over, shocked at its detail. Where he cut his hair, got his coffee, bought his books. His favorite restaurants, the chess clubs he’s a member of, his local hospital.

His local hospital?!

“I’m not going to need to know that, am I?” you paused.

“Probably not, but it comes in handy with this job,” she shrugged with a nonchalance that was rather alarming.

There had to be a dozen more places on the sheet –– ranked, in order of his (assumed) preference for them. Penelope calculated it based on the frequency of his visits, their average duration per session, and how often he’d mentioned about the place.

“What?” she tossed her palms up, taking offense when you asked her if she had evil plans to take over the tristate area. “Hang out with him long enough, you tell me if you pick up a knack for researching or not.”

Researching. Mining private data through questionable methods. It’s a small difference to Penelope.

“Remind me not to get on your bad side, Penelope,” you muttered under your breath, flipping the sheet back and forth. “You could ruin my whole life with ten minutes on a computer.”

“I wanted to be thorough,” she defended, shrugging. “And I’d only need five.”

You laughed through your nose, giving the paper one last scan. “You left out one important thing, though.”

“No, I put his home address on there,” her brows wrinkled together as she pointed it out on the sheet with one hot pink polished finger.

“His name,” you berated. “Jesus, you think I’m going to show up at his home?!”

“Again! I’m thorough,” she cried at your accusatory tone. “His name’s Spencer. You’ll like him when you meet him.” 

_

You didn’t doubt that Penelope’s friend was a likeable guy, but you weren’t exactly dying to go out of your way to meet him. You told her that you’d get around to it when you had a chance and left it at that.

And two weeks later, you found yourself in need of a caffeine fix that your tea kettle wasn’t strong enough to satisfy. You started on a new piece late the previous night, and midnight rolled into four in the morning, which pushed you into the arms of seven o’clock. Reinforcements were needed.

Throwing on a large sweater to cover up your messy clothes and grabbing the closest pair of shoes you could find, you originally planned on heading to your usual spot just around your street corner. Just as you were leaving, the list, still sitting untouched in the exact spot that Penelope left it in, caught your eye.

It’d been a while since you told Penelope you’d help her out. Enough time had passed that you now felt like there was an invisible deadline over your head.

Maybe it won’t hurt to try something new?

Besides, meeting someone at a coffee shop seemed like an easy, foolproof way to go about this. From all the movies and romance novels, you knew that cafes are the pinnacle of meet-cute situations. Or, in your case, a meet-forced.

Regardless, it should’ve been simple enough, and it would’ve gotten the favor off your shoulder.

You scanned the sheet for the cafe Spencer would be at on a Thursday at 8 a.m., and got there with barely five minutes to spare before he was expected to show.

It was just your luck that he had to pick a cafe practically as far from your home as he could get, and the transfer train had to have a delay that made you walk the last three-quarters of a mile there. Call it crazy, but you didn’t expect to actually have to put in work for this. You expected it better be worth the hassle.

You took a seat in the back of the cafe to catch your breath as you waited for him to show up. Sitting in the booth, with your head down so you coudn’t be seen, the plan started to feel stupid all over again. You were running around the city, spying on this stranger, and for what?

The silver bell hung over the door frame interrupted before your thoughts could travel down that path of questioning. It rang each time a new patron enters, and within the next twenty minutes it rang only eight or nine times. None of them appeared to be Spencer.

You were prepared to call this one a failure and leave, when you realized your colossal mistake. You only had his name, and no idea what he looks like. So unless he happened to wear a name tag around you could’ve already missed him. You realized then that there were more than a few flaws in this plan.

Keeping an eye on the door, you dialed Penelope’s contact as a swarm of new patrons flooded in.

“How am I supposed to know what he looks like?” you whispered into the phone, failing to cover it with a hand cupped over the speaker. Penelope was confused for only a second by the apparent lack of context.

“Oh! He’s tall, has mousy brown hair but he cut it recently. It’s like… missing on the sides, but it’s all there in the front!” she explained.

What the hell does she mean missing?

“Pen, brunette? That’s like all the guys in here…” You took a look around the full cafe; various men typing on computers, taking calls. All of them looked the same, from their brown hair to their khakis and puffer coats. “You’re going to have to give me a little more than brown hair.”

Penelope struggled to explain and with each new feature she gave you, your mental picture of him got more clouded. “He’s skinny! Dresses like a vintage teddy bear!”

“Does he have kind of like… a hot English teacher vibe?” you quirked your head, spying a man approaching from the sidewalk and drinking him in with your eyes. Tall, brunette, clad in corduroy head to toe with a plaid sweater vest underneath. Vintage Teddy Bear F/W 1978 collection.

“Yes! He teaches sometimes! And you think he’s hot?”

Your mouth gaped even though she couldn’t see you. “No, I - I didn’t say that. I said he had the vibes of a hot teacher.”

“And how different is that from saying he’s––”

“Pen, I gotta go. Your guy’s walking in.” You put the phone away before she could pick apart what you said.

The bell on the front door rang as he came in and you stared intently at his face. If this was like the movies, he’d turn his head right then, at the perfect time, and make eye contact. He’d fall madly in love from the first look, and your work would be done. You sat at the edge of your seat, burning holes into his skull, waiting for that moment.

But alas, he never looked up from the linoleum flooring as he walked up to the counter. With a groan, you slid out of your booth and quickly hopped into the line before anyone else could claim the spot behind him.

New plan: eavesdrop, order the same coffee as him, and pretend to go for the cup at the same time. Laugh about the coincidence, how if you share the same coffee order you must certainly have a lot in common, and have him fall in love with you.

But you overheard him rattle off his order and were absolutely horrified. Black coffee, extra sugar. Like, extra, extra sugar.

You were going to need a second change of plans.

You eyed him up and down, searching for something you could approach him about. He was donning black converse under a fitted pair of dark brown corduroy trousers, with a blazer to match, and a deep green plaid vest underneath. On paper, this outfit shouldn’t work. In practice, it… really did.

A little too well, given how good he looks in it. More fashionable than a federal agent ought to be as required by dress codes, right?

“Can I help you?” you heard, and it poked the bubble of your thoughts. Your head shot up to meet his for the first time, eyes wide as heat crawled up your face.

“Uh. No ––” Shit. You didn’t even realize how long you were staring at his legs. Long, long legs. And shit, why did you say no? That was your opening to talk to him.

The man –– Spencer –– nodded his head slowly, uncomfortably, and turned away with a forced grin. He grabbed the coffee cup placed on the counter and you thought now was the time to say something. But by the time you thought of it, he’d already picked up his cup and made his way to the door.

The stupid silver bell mocked you as he left.

__

The first attempt left you slightly jilted, but a few days later you found yourself in need of a few grocery items. You just happened to be in his neighborhood that day, and though it was very much out of the way of your own, you didn’t plan on it being a problem. He’d never see where you lived anyways, and he’d never need to know how unlikely this chance encounter really was.

You had Penelope text you the address of his regular grocery store, and upon arrival, felt immediate concern. It was not a grocery store. It was a convenience mart slash liquor store at the corner of the street, below a building of worn apartments.

As you walked through the aisles, the only things you found were a large assortment of wines that took up half the small store space, an aisle of candy packets and chips, a section for household supplies, and one measly aisle for canned and boxed foods.

Cereal, instant noodles, soup cans, pancake mix… nothing very fresh.

Spencer seemed like a pretty scrawny guy. You now believed it might’ve been from the fact that his food choices were so off-putting that he simply didn’t eat. It wasn’t your place to be concerned, but you decided that if you ever ended up taking him out, a farmer’s market might be good for him.

You loitered around for perhaps longer than necessary. The inquisitive shop attendant asked if you need help –– as in, why are you still here, get out of my store –– and you told her you were just really conflicted on which detergent brand you needed. Finally, the man you were after arrived at the scene.

“Hi, Dolores,” he greete with a small wave. The attendant, Dolores, greets back with a positivity that she sorely lacked when talking to you. Dolores has favorites, apparently.

An unexpected panic settled in your stomach and you quickly turned back to your selection of fabric softeners. You weren’t hiding, you just didn’t want him to catch you staring again. You picked up your two props, pretending to read the labels on the back and compare the chemical formulas on each of them, when you saw him out of the corner of your eyes.

He went into the aisle in front of yours, and over the short shelves you saw the back of his head sweeping over the modest food section. He turned around to inspect the other side of the aisle, and you ducked your head even lower. It was in vain. He spotted you anyway.

You fixed your eyes even harder onto the bottles, afraid to look anywhere else. He shuffled out of his aisle and turned the corner into yours. You started sweating a little.

“Uhm. Excuse me,” he said.

“Yeah?” You looked up from your bottles, putting on your best caught-off-guard face. Like you were a girl in a movie, reading a book on the beach (not detergent labels in a liquor store) and your romantic interest just noticed how beautiful you looked doing it, deciding he had to introduce himself.

“Can you… can you move…” he asked, gesturing to the section of cleaners that you’re blocking.

Never mind.

“Oh! Yeah, sorry.” You burned up, moving out of his way. He reached for what he needed and you peeked down to inspect the contents of his basket. Organic whole wheat bread, cream of mushroom soup, and somehow, he’d managed to find the only two apples this place must carry. At least there was light at the end of the dark, dark tunnel.

He tossed a bottle of Snuggle fabric softener and you raised your brows. Given that he was “grocery shopping’’ in a three-piece suit –– a good one, too, black trousers, vest and blazer with an eggplant purple shirt and lavender tie –– you would’ve expected him to simply send his clothes out for dry cleaning.

“Snuggle, huh?” you said. He gave you a confused look. “Oh, uh. I was looking at these. Couldn’t pick between the two.” You raised your two bottles of softener; Snuggle and Tide.

You needed him to know you weren’t just saying Snuggle to insinuate that you would like to do that to him. You remembered Penelope telling you he had a degree in chemistry or some sort of science field, and asked, “Is… is that one like, more organic? I was trying to read the formulas but I don’t… I don’t recognize the chemicals,” you trailed off. You could see yourself losing his interest the more you spoke. He barely looked at you as he grabbed whatever else he needed.

“I don’t know… I just like it,” he bristled. You looked down at the bottle and flipped it over to the front. It had a drawing of a teddy bear on it. How fitting.

You go to comment on it but yet again he’d made an escape, already at the checkout counter and unloading his basket by the time you looked up again. You rolled your eyes, wondering if it’s even worth it to follow him into line and see if he sparks up a conversation this time.

You could tell that he wouldn’t. So you gave him the space to buy his items and leave.

You didn’t really need the detergent, but Dolores gave you a pointed look before you could even think about putting it back on the shelf. You ended up buying the detergent, a loaf of bread, and two packets of sweets out of guilt.

As you took the train home, digging into your packet of sour peach rings, you began to doubt if you can carry out Penelope’s request.

_

After two failed attempts, you were prepared to tell Penelope that this just wasn’t going to work out. You didn’t expect it to be this difficult to talk to Spencer nor did you see yourself getting closer to him anytime soon. It would be best if she just found someone else to do it.

You caught her in the hallway, leaving her apartment just as you came home from the store. It seemed like as good of a time as any to let her know how unsuccessful your escapades were going. With your tail between your legs, you approached her with the intention of breaking the plan off.

But the second she saw you, it was like she could read through you. She clocked what you were about to say and before you could, she gave you a warm hug. It was the first one you’d ever received from her, actually. And she thanked you for trying.

It didn’t make you feel guilty, per se, but it definitely made you feel weird about telling her the news. So you bit back on telling her what you were really going to say. She didn’t need to know the details of your failure, or the fact that you were seconds away from giving up on her friend.

Maybe you didn’t need to give up right away.

After all, you did only talk to the guy twice. Don’t they always say the third time’s the charm?

You left the conversation at just that –– letting her know that you’re happy to do this for her, even if you aren’t really –– and slinked back into your apartment. The list, buried under the magazines and paint tubes and half-full cups of cold coffee on your table, called for you.

If by any stroke of luck you happened to share one interest with this guy, you promised yourself to give it one more try.

According to the list, that overlapping interest was the wonderful world of Gatsby Books –– a small, locally owned bookstore residing in the heart of D.C. ’s arts district. That neighborhood was smack in the middle of your’s and Spencer’s, and it was where the gallery you showcase at was.

You’d been meaning to get down there for a while now, anyways. It really was the cutest bookstore in the world; inside it lived a white, bushy-furred cat named Gatsby, and he was always there. After all, it was his bookstore.

It wasn’t such a burden to make your visit fit Spencer’s schedule, really. And it would make Penelope happy if you did. So on Saturday afternoon, you took a lovely walk through the sunny arts district of D.C., a smile on your face and a tote in hand for all the books you were planning on hauling back.

The smell of paper and coffee greeted your nose at the door, and you practically fell into a trance, letting it lead you through the aisles of the store without much thought of where you wandered. Not that it mattered, you could’ve roamed the shelves aimlessly all day long.

In the mystery and thrillers section, you found Gatsby. He jumped down from his perch on a step stool and weaved between your legs, greeting one of his long-time regulars. He was such a good shop owner.

“Hi, Mr. Gatsby.” You smiled and bent down to give him a little head scratch when he started running off in the other direction, taunting you into following him.

He rounded the corner and came to a stop at a pair of boot-clad feet; your eyes moved up to find your favorite employee (after Gatsby, of course) restocking the shelves.

“Miles!” you whispered, but he still jumped out of his skin. He turned around, hand still over his chest, and sighed when he realized it was just you. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you,” you laughed.

“Hey, long time, no see. Back for some more recommendations?” You ‘ooh’ed at his offer.

“I was just gonna say, the ones you gave me last time were so good. I finished them in, like, a week.”

“Really?” He smiled, brows happily up his forehead. You nodded in assent. “Okay, well I’ll give you more this time, see if the list’ll last you a little longer than that.”

You grinned eagerly, following him to the shop counter where he pulled out a stack of bright green post-its and a pen.

“I’ve actually been waiting for you to come in, I already had these in mind for you,” he mumbled, scrawling across the paper quickly. He handed the note over, and it took a moment to decipher the chicken scratches.

“Okay, first you gave me Al-Shayk and Bradbury. Now you’re giving me Chaucer, Dickens, and Doyle,” you recited the note, giving him a teasing look. “Are we just going through the alphabet, Miles?” you joked.

“Honest mistake. But I’d be happy to give you all the other twenty-two letters of the alphabet if needed.”

“I might hold you to that.” You nodded, folding the post-it in your palm to prevent the sticky backing from gunking up. It’d make quite the good bookmark for later. “Thanks for these!”

“No problem, just a part of the job.”

Nonetheless, you thanked him again before disappearing back into the aisles. You found Miles’ books as well as a few of your own and nearly lost yourself in the rows of floor-to-ceiling bookshelves, until you made a turn. Standing in the middle of the next aisle was Spencer.

A week ago, he was the whole point of coming to the store. That day, you completely forgot about it, and it stopped you in your tracks to see him there. He was just standing in the middle of the walkway, staring blankly at the shelf in front of him.

“Excuse me,” you grinned, “Could you move?”

You thought it was a cute reference back to the laundry detergent fiasco, a chance for you to turn the tables, but he had no reaction to it whatsoever. His face was straight as he merely pivoted his shoulder out of your way as you reached for the book you needed; The Narrative of John Smith.

His eyes narrowed at you and his nostrils flared, and you wondered if it was called for because you grabbed the last copy they had in stock.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Did you want this?” you asked, waving the book in his face. He was just standing there for so long, you didn’t think he actually wanted anything since he never picked it up.

“No,” he said coldly.

Contrary to Penelope’s review, he didn’t actually seem that warm of a person. But you smiled tightly at him, letting a forced laugh fill the stale air.

“I… I swear I’m not stalking you,” you laughed, rubbing the back of your neck. Technically it was a bit of a lie, but he didn’t need to know. It’s just something people say when they have the happy coincidence of running into a stranger so often.

“What did you say to me?” he bit. His tone was sharper than you felt like this conversation deserves.

“I mean, I’ve just been seeing you around a lot… it was, like, a joke? Like, ‘ahh watch out, I’m stalking you!’ you know?” With each second he stared you down, you felt your throat dry out, getting more flustered as you felt the need to over explain yourself.

“Maybe you should work on your comedy routine,” he barked, his voice just faintly cracking. He shoulder-checked you as he rushed out of the store in long strides and a brisk pace.

What in the absolute fuck.

You couldn’t stay in the shop for another minute. You dropped your stack of books at the counter with Miles, giving him a rushed apology for leaving them behind as you stormed out of the shop and headed in the opposite direction of where Spencer ran off to.

The air outside was now frosty as the sun disappeared behind the horizon; the wind nipped at your hot cheeks as you charged home. There weren’t enough words to quantify the anger you felt. Your mind ran rampant with how much you now hated this man.

Not only did he bite your head off for no good reason, but he publicly embarrassed you at your favorite place and had gone so far as to bruise your shoulder to make a point. And you know what? If he really wanted you out of his way, you were more than happy to leave him the hell alone for the rest of your life.

You reached into your jacket pocket for your phone and dialed Penelope.

“Hey! How are––” she cheered.

“It’s off.”

“What?”

“It’s off. I’m not dating your fucking friend.”

“What happened? I’m sure it’s just a misunderstanding––” she started in a panic. She pleaded that you overlook whatever went wrong and promised that she’d have a talk with Spencer about it. She’d try to encourage him into the direction that you need.

None of that registered in your brain, hot blood filling your ears instead of her words.

“He’s a fucking ass,” you spat. “The more I see of him, the less I like him, and… I’m pretty sure we’d rather kill each other than date at this point. So yeah, I’m done.”

☆

☆

☆

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[niks-minion]

BNHA 310 Chapter rambling

Man, it’s been so long since my last try to analyze this mess pretending to be funny.

Let’s have one more go!

So from the first page Hori puts us in a dark “Batman vs Superman” vibe atmosphere. Rainy season is a bitch.

Are these dudes heroes or vigilantes or just citizens who pretend they care? Poor giant girl. Stomp on them, you have all the rights.

It’s a bird, it’s a plane... it’s Superman!

Deku is just like “ok fellas, how about you back off?” And they are “ok man, jeez, no need to be rude”

What a caring little bun. A true gentleman. I’d have a crush if I was this lady.

I don’t have guts to joke about sugar daddy, I’m sorry.

Seriously tho, during his 40 years of work, I imagine AM has like 30 cars like that. Deku, you lucky bastard. Not only caring but awfully rich dad. Score!

WHO ALSO MAKES YOU FOOD. He enrolled in cooking class after retirement.

Deku even looks like his mini copy.

Hello to my fav hellboy. I’ve missed this dude.

Yep, no progress here. I kinda really curious what the villains up to rn. I like how Deku separated Dabi in his own category 👀

“I doubt Endeavor with Aizawa together...” so not Hawks, not BJ (like the ones from top three) but Aizawa. Thanks, sir. Dadzawa deserves to be listed among the strongest ones!

I don’t even want to cut this frame.

Like we clearly can see panic, and that he’s scared. That the weight of responsibility is pretty damn hard to carry.

But this makes me wonder about todo and baku again. Like Izuku is ok to trust Top 3, to rely on ofa tea party but left those two behind in order to protect? Well, I’m sure as hell they didn’t took that lightly.

Welp, with those two out of the picture we still need our gay tension so here we go!

My heroes 👀 mhm, ok.

Oops, awkward. Not only bnha fandom caught up, but the whole bunch of guys on their pompous chairs are ready to facepalm. 6th rolled his eyes, I’m telling you.

Hahah, have I said that I absolutely adore that gremlin of the ofa squad? Because I do.

It reminds me of Todo family dinner and Bakugou screaming to send it back to normalcy. Nice move!

Oh come on, we all know how it works. Turn around and let Yoichi drag you in the battle. It’s the power of lo... friendship!

On a serious note, I like how the 2 and 3 don’t just jump on the bandwagon. They doubt it and their reasoning is valid.

He has a point, ok?!

I can’t go and leave the elephant in the room. I KNOW HE LOOKS LIKE BAKUGOU.

I’m still gonna die on the hill of denial. Numbers in names thing, his general vibe, Deku without a hint of recognition, this time travel trope being stupid as fuck... you name it.

But thanks, now a have a vivid image of adult Baku for future fics. Yay.

Anyhow, doesn’t prevent me to put him in my number one place from ofa holders. It’s just my type.

Oh, sweet sweet parallels. For me as I see it, it’s a hint on bkdk in the past, also Shigaraki and Deku. Everyone deserves a hand. To be saved.

Also it’s a hint on bkdk 3. This time tho it’s gonna be Bakugou. Extending hand with “you’re not alone, stupid nerd”. He’s gonna be a true hero, and I’m gonna cry a sea of proud tears.

Not only that, it’s a declaration of friendship. Like back then, according to Deku, Bakugou would only accept Kirishima’s hand- bc they are equals and bc they are friends.

BNHA IS ABOUT HANDS HOLY SHIT.

Todo and Enji, Bakugou and Midoriya, now this... TOO SOFT JUST THE WAY I PREFER.

Ok this is my favorite frame this week.

They are so badass, ready to kick asses but then you look closely and see the bento box, lol.

Poor kiddo, no time for self-care.

“Shut up, food first!” Kageyama, you’re right as always!

In conclusion, I want to say, Hori pls give me my boys back already, I’m afraid I can’t suffer any longer. Also despite Deku’s gauntlets I still anticipate some kind of drawback. This top3 squad is doomed to fail.

Also 2,3 guys better not have quirks even slightly similar to Todo and Baku ones.

[peonyneko]

Hi! I have a request :) How would Izuku act around a reader with a feline quirk? I’d say the quirk would be interesting— like a cat she’d sleep more than regular stufents— she could jump high— and she has claws. Either way, what would Midoriya think?

Izuku x Feline!Reader

- When he first saw your he immediately noticed your subtle feline features. Your sharp eyes, pointed ears, and canines were the first to capture his attention. "Someone with feline quirk! But what kind?" were his first thoughts.

- He was immediately interested in your quirk because "another transformation quirk!" But he didn't want to assume so he would trying ease into knowing your quirk.

- After knowing you for about a month, expect him to ask about your quirk without any hesitation.

- Are you tired often because of your messy sleep/school schedule because of your nocturnal nature? He will try to constantly recommend ways to slip in nap here and there throughout the school day.

- "Hey, ____. We have 25 minutes until battle starts. I saw a beanbag near the entrance early. You should go rest!"

- Lunch time? He'll sometimes forgets that you're not in danger when eating foods felines normally shouldn't have. After all, you're still human. "___! You can't eat choc- Wait, uh nevermind. Continue"

- Your incredible hearing really fascinates him. He can rarely ever sneak up on you, especially during battle and training. He takes up the challenge and is glad that you're helping him become smoother and more quiet with his actions.

- "Ah! So close," he said with a support item from your hero suit in his hand. He managed to grab it before you jumped away.

- Although he expected it, he's quite shocked by your flexibility. One time, your pencil fell behind your desk. He was just about to get but your body did a whole twist and you easily got your pencil without his help. He was left calculating the amount of surprises he will continue to get from you.

- He's fascinated by your claws. They help you climb, attack, cut, and so much more. Lucky you! He's always on watch for them when you two practice fighting. He would be someone to recommend serums or care products that will strengthen and sharpen your claws.

- "Do you need scissors? Oh, you already opened it?!" Wow, the claws really are cool and useful

- Your feline noises (For ex: meows, purrs, and soft rumbles) surprise him but he finds it cute and soothing. He is able to easily tell your emotions from them. Especially when they're negative ones, they immediately grab his attention. He looks out for them so he knows your mental state, too.

- Sometimes he notices that you're on edge because of your ears and eyes hinting it. He tries to calm you down by talking to you or giving you something to scratch or fidget with.

- When ever you both race, you both are quite literally flying. He's speeding with his jumps (also if you read the manga then you know what else). You're just as fast with your jumps and runs.

- When you jump up, he is in awe because you jump incredibly high, like Tsuyu. He does get worried when you jump down from very high heights but he remembers that it's your quirk and you know how to control it.

- He's likes your transformations. One second you're fully human, the next you're the feline creature he knows (and loves). You even do a hybrid transformation which hold a lot of advantages. He really wonders what your tail and ears feel like but he wouldn't want to touch them without your permission. (And he's worried you'll find him odd or creepy).

- He stands up for you when others try to put your down because of your animal quirk. He will let you handle the comments yourself but he will say something too. "They work just as hard as anyone else. You should mind your words and treat them as an equal."

- Your canines! He likes the way they look. Lowkey has the urge to touch them to see how sharp they are but (once again) he doesn't want to be creep and make you uncomfortable.

- Your movements are so smooth and fluid. He's in awe. No wonder some villains and training opponents look captivated when you move. Not only that, you move so fast. He needs to move his eyes fast in order to catch a glimpse of you.

- He absolutely loves it when you fully transform and become an emotional support for some of your classmates. When it's someone you're not close with or you're too tired, you're able to easily call other felines for help. He finds your kind gestures really heartwarming.

- One time you became his emotional support feline and he was so happy but nervous. He was ecstatic to touch your fur because it's so pretty. You're so pretty. Your noises calmed him down too. Your presences brought good vibes and he felt at ease. (Of course, he did ask for permission if he can).

- He tries to actively know if you are bothered by any actions or words. If you tell him about something that hurts you or you don't like, he'll immediately put it on his "don't do" list. He will also tell the class so they're aware.

- Is so proud of you during battles and challenges because you're doing incredible. Wow, look at them! That move was a great choice. They're my ____ alright. Wait... my?

- Also, being the observant male that he is. He also knows your weaknesses. He kindly lets you know the areas he thinks you can improve on. He also wants your suggestions on his power. He wants to work on his and your weaknesses together.

- You both already had an agreement. If you were to fall asleep in an odd place or position then he would help you out.

- He noticed your room was unlocked but you weren't there. Instead, when he went downstairs, you were sleeping in the main room. You were balled up under the table. His eyes soften and he goes near you. They're too cute. I'll take them to their room.

- Overall, Izuku would absolutely love the reader's feline quirk. He is fascinated by your strengths and weaknesses. Your transformations, features, and personality have him enraptured.

-----------

I tried not to specify the readers gender because different people might read this. If you want something similar, a part 2, or even a small story/imagine, please let me know. I hope you enjoyed it! Once again, sorry for the delay.

[lethargicsunlight]

Dabi X SpookyQuirk!Reader "Necromancer" (Part 15)

(I'm finally getting over the #bigsick and I'm so glad to be back into writing. I might have something else SpookyQuirk! coming out soon.. promise this story's still got a lot coming though :P )

THIS SERIES HAS A TAG LIST!~ Leave a comment on this post, or on the tag list itself here: LINK! if you would like to be added!

WARNINGS: Light gore, SFW, creepy/spooky vibes, SPOILERS

Haga decided to stick around.

You were surprised he wanted to, and normally you might've tried persuading him to 'move on'. But honestly, you appreciated his company. Especially now, as you stood before a tall and ominous metal door.

It reminded you of standing in front of the principle's office when you were in school.

"You trust this guy?" He asks from beside you.

"...He's the first person that ever really acknowledged my quirk as something useful."

"That doesn't mean you trust him." Haga retaliates, taking a few steps forward. "I'll be around. Let me know if you need me."

You give him a nod as your heart strings are pulled. You couldn't fathom why he wanted to stay, why he wanted to help. But knowing you had an ace in the hole made you feel a lot better about this interaction. For the all the good All for One's done you, he was still..

Creepy.

"You may come in, whenever you like.."

You flinch as the intercom comes to life. "R-right."

-----

In a room a few hallways down..

Dabi paces the floor like a carnivore.

"Please sit down?" Mr. Compress tries again, leaning into a pillar nearby. "You were only just attended to moments ago, you should rest. Y/n will be fine."

Why doesn't it feel like it?  Dabi asks in silence, giving the masked man a look.

"If anything, maybe he wants to offer praise? That stunt was unlike anything the world's ever seen. The Dead coming to life..?" He shakes his head to draw emphasis. "He'll have big plans for that, I wager."

"That." Dabi says, pointing in Compress's face. "That is what I'm afraid of."

"Pray tell, Touya, what would you have the Master do then? Lock Y/n away? With that kind of power, they could change everything for the League. Is that not why you're here? To change the world?"

Dabi groans in frustration, "Yes." And he thinks on it for a moment before he answers again, "But I don't want to lose my friends in the process."

-----

You were surprised by the amount of tubing and wiring that existed in the space supposedly housing All for One. It was also dark, only back-lit by strangely placed television screens and component lights.

He was indeed a villain, and his lair looked like it belonged to such.

"Ahh, there's the villain of the hour."

You take an involuntary step back as the tubes and wires twist beneath some mechanical arm, revealing a dais as it swivels to face you.

It's All for One. He doesn't look any different from the last time you'd seen him, although in a different place. His face still gave you the creeps, in the way that it really didn't look like a face at all. Just, skin stretched uncomfortably over mangled bone.

He put some of the corpses you've seen to shame.

"How have you been?"

You have to suck in a breath at the realization he expected you to answer. The pressure that mean could exude was terrifying. "Ah--I'm, fine. Good."

"Yes? According to Shigaraki, it sounded as though you'd been through the ringer. I heard you died." He stands from his chair of tubing, approaching the end of the dais. "And came back, of course."

You swallow.

"O-oh, yes, right--I did. It was, unpleasant, but.. I need to test out what I was able to do."

"Right you are." He says, an arm extending out and taking hold of a handle. Pulling it forward, he reveals a screen. "Not only that though... it seems as though you caused quite a scene during our attack in Esuha."

The screen flashes rainbow pixels when he  turns it on, before settling on the image of a city-scape. You can see smoke in the sky, despite the poor resolution. Before you even have the time to feel put on the spot, his presses a button that causes the video the play.

It's a broadcast from the Esuha City's local news station.

"Can you get in closer?" Someone says, presumably the spokesperson. From the whirring you could tell they were in a helicopter.

The camera zooms in and out of focus over the sky-scrapers and business towers until, finally, the image clears. You can see a fiery outline of Endeavor on the street, and a dark blotch you could only assume was your Dabi.

"It looks like some kind of face off between the Number One Pro-Hero Endeavor, and League of Villain's Dabi--wait.."

The camera zooms in and out of focus again as it moves.

"Who is.. there's someone else approaching." The anchor says, and does so in a way that adds suspense. (Despite how dire the situation was actually supposed to be.)

When the camera's image becomes clear again, it's you. You're standing in front of Dabi, and it's surreal to see yourself through the camera's lens.

"I can't make out what they're saying. Closer?" The Anchor asks again, and it does appear that whoever is driving the helicopter makes a valiant attempt at just that.

You already know what's coming next. It causes a pit in your stomach, and you aren't sure why.

The air comes dense around your form on the screen; much like a fog. The anchor complains about it for a moment, but the helicopter drops enough in altitude that the image was no longer disrupted.

"I'm not sure what this new villain is doing, everyone be careful.." The anchor chimes, probably directed at the pilot. "It looks like mist or.. some kind of illusion perhaps or--what is.. what is that? Are those people?"

The anchor cannot see as well as the camera can shoot, it seems. Zoomed in, the camera picks up a crystal clear image of the walking corpses you remember from the fight before you blacked out. All of the ghosts you had managed to call to your aid seemed to walk into existence as though stepping out of a wall of water.

"Corpses?!" The Anchor exclaims, finally catching on. The camera shakes as it zooms and pans, following some of the more grotesque in appearance as they drag themselves in Endeavor's direction. "That's impossible.."

"It's like one of those things.." Another voice pipes in from behind the camera. "A Necromancer, out of a video game.. Bringing the dead to life."

The screen goes black and All for One pulls it away. You're left breathless--you hadn't realized you'd been holding it.

"Necromancer." He tests it on his tongue, following it up with a wide smile. "I don't think I could've come up with anything better."

Chills erupt down your spine.

I'm supposed to want to be here. You remind yourself, trying to steel those unruly nerves.

"I'll admit, I wasn't prepared for such a revelation." He continues, turning away from you on his dais. "I had only considered your quirk for things like espionage. But this.." He chuckles darkly, large shoulders jostling beneath the pressed line of his suit. "This is so much better. You've really changed things, you know?"

Forget steeling your nerves, they're jelly now.

"H-how?" You ask, voice unapologetically wavering. "How have I changed things?"

"You are a voice." He says, a white gloved hand gesturing in your direction. (strange considering he doesn't have eyes, and you only now noticed he's completely aware of where you are--and where everything is in this room.) "The Dead speak through you. And the Dead know the truth. They know of the injustice that has plagued our society better than any underdog could. Better than anyone alive could."

You glance off, catching an image of Haga among the electronics at the side of the room. You wondered how he felt about all of this.

"You may be the catalyst the League always needed."

Strange, you think as takes a moment to press something into his chairs mini-keyboard. I still don't understand how that changes anything..

But you weren't about to ask!

"For now, continue to improve your abilities as you aid the League. While our mission went without any notable gains, it was not all in vain." He pulls forward yet another screen to show you, which has a selection of images that flash across them rather than a video.

"This is the Pro-Hero Hawks. We've managed to strike a bargain, and he'll be our eyes within the Pro-Hero ranks. He's going to be working closely with Twice and Dabi for the foreseeable future."

The image is of a man, close to Dabi's age, with sandy blonde hair and very noticeable giant red wings. You'd definitely heard of him before. He was in the Top Three--at least before the time you were.. brought here.

"I want you to keep an eye on him while you work alongside Dabi."

Fear flashes across your eyes as you glance at him, and it causes him another chuckle.

"Oh, I know about you two." He leans away, mouth still bared in a grin. "But, conviction to one another is a powerful tool if you ask me. I won't get in the way of that."

Another breath of relief leaves your lungs. Yeesh does this man have presence.

"I will check in on occasion to see how you're improving."

You nod, "Understood."

"You've done well today, Necromancer. I expect great things from you. Just do me one favor.."

You stare towards him, but find it hard to place your gaze without eyes to inspect. You settle on the collar of his suit. "Yes sir?"

"Don't die." He grins, "Again."

[viastro]

prove it | chwe vernon hansol

ミ★ synopsis: in which the university fuckboy does whatever it takes to prove that he genuinely has feelings for you.

ミ★ genre: slice of life!au, player!vernon, humor, fluff

ミ★ warnings: none!

ミ★ word count: 3,603

ミ★ pairings: vernon x female reader

ミ★ notes: hi guys! this oneshot ended up a lot longer than i originally planned. however, this always happens when i write oneshots so this isn’t anything new. i chose this gif because vernon’s blonde hair makes me cry a lil and i couldn’t find any other blonde vernon gifs that match the vibe of this whole oneshot uh help me :DD oh ! i also hope you enjoy the mini cameo from my characters in cafe chuu hehe !! anyways... make sure to give vernon lots of love !! 

You know those guys that are real sleazy? Like, the ones that know they’re able to get whatever girl they want and truly use it to their advantage? So they absolutely just… never settle?

that’s vernon.

You don’t judge, but that’s also a lie because you absolutely do judge since your poor best friend was a victim of his sleaziness. Can you blame her? No, the man is godly. Do you blame Vernon? 

yes! 

While Chaewon never told you the full story, all you needed to know is that she was hurt. Which is enough reason to despise the man, no matter how attractive he is.

You purse your lips in disgust as you watch Vernon walk into class late, silently cursing him when he says hi to his friend on the way to his desk. Chaewon stares at you with a bored look on her face, wondering why you’re so angry about the man when you claim you don’t care about him. She pokes your shoulder, and you turn to her with a big smile, a stark contrast to the previous glare on your face.

“Just say you love him and go baby.” Chaewon tells you, and you immediately pretend to vomit in your bag. She rolls her eyes, shoving you lightly with her hand as she giggles at your antics. “As if I could ever like a sleazy, gross, beautiful ass man like him.” 

Chaewon raises an eyebrow at the last adjective, and you choose to ignore the fact that you called him beautiful, as well as the heat rushing to your face. She lets out a sigh, turning towards the front of the room when your professor begins roll call. 

“We can all see you have a heart boner for him.” Chaewon mutters, and you have half the mind to reach out and slap her shoulder, only to stop when your teacher calls your name. 

“YLN YN?” You raise your hand up, flashing them a smile. 

“Here.” Your teacher nods, before carrying on with the list, and you lean back into your seat. You open your notebook to prepare your notes page, only to pause when you feel a pair of eyes on you. You slowly glance up from your desk to see Vernon staring at you with an amused smile on his face. 

Immediately you turn your eyes away and look at your journal, feeling warmth blossom across your cheeks at the fact that he’s still staring at you. Do you know why? No. Do you want to know why? yes. No!

Chaewon glances at Vernon, making eye contact with him. She points towards you as you focus your attention on your journal, and he shrugs at her. She tilts her head to the side, and he mouths,

“I’m going to ask yn out today!” 

To which Chaewon grins, shaking her head at him and turning to face the front of the room. She chuckles quietly to herself, knowing that it’s not going to be as easy as he believes it’ll be. While Vernon smiles, thinking of the different ways you’ll probably say yes.

“No.” You answer boredly as you walk towards the bus stop, Vernon following close behind you. You don’t bother to spare the handsome man a glance, and Vernon runs in front of you, raising both his hands up to stop you from walking. You let out a sigh, crossing your arms as you stare at him.

“When you said no, you were joking… right?” You raise an eyebrow at him, and Vernon feels his heart sink to his ass when he realizes you actually mean no. Something he hasn’t heard from anyone he’s asked out before. 

“I meant no. I don’t want to go out with you Vernon.” You tell him and he runs a hand through his blonde hair in confusion. Ignoring the fast pace of your heart, you flash him a smile, to which his eyes slightly widen at the sight. You fail to notice the tips of his ears turning red at the sight, and you let out a breath. 

“You’re the fuckboy of the University. I don’t wanna date you just for me to get hurt when you get bored.” You explain and Vernon lets out a scoff at the term you used. “Fuckboy?” 

“Yes. A fuckboy. A sleazy,” You step forward and poke his chest, causing him to suck in a breath at the close proximity between the two of you. “horny, promiscuous, fuckboy.” 

Vernon gapes at you, and you grin at the sight of him being speechless. You lean back, raising your hand up to wave at him. 

“Bye Vernon!” You say cheerfully, before stepping past him and walking towards the bus stop once again. Vernon turns around, watching your retreating figure as the sun begins to set. 

“I’m not gonna stop trying!” Vernon shouts from behind you, but you refuse to turn back. You know it’s all for show, he never actually puts in much of an effort on the rare occasion that a girl rejects him. Vernon lets out an amused smile, before turning around and walking back towards the parking lot. 

“What do you mean you and Vernon were never a thing? You guys hung out a lot last year outside of classes, and you even cried over him.” You tell Chaewon with wide eyes. She chuckles in response, shaking her head at you. 

“Yn, Vernon’s my cousin. We lived together for our first year of uni last year because we wanted to save money, that’s why we were always together after classes finished. I cried during class last year because I read his text telling me the news about his dog passing.” You raise a hand to your mouth in shock at the surprise your best friend just dropped. You don’t even know how you didn’t have any idea of this, because the more you look at her, the resemblance between the two begins to show.

“I-I thought you were dating your cousin?” 

“You absolutely did.” 

“So Vernon’s never hurt you?”

“Only when we played nerf when we were younger.” 

“So he’s not a fuckboy who hurt my best friend?”

Chaewon giggles, reaching her hand up and patting your head softly. She shakes her head, “He’s not a fuckboy who hurt me. He’s just a guy who happens to like a lot of girls but can never find the one to settle down with. AKA, a fuckboy.”

You glance down at your rice, picking up the spoon and shoving a chunk of rice into your mouth as you stress eat. Chaewon watches you with amusement, knowing that Vernon asked you on a date yesterday, to which you confidently told him no. However, you didn’t mention any of that to Chaewon, but Vernon told her the whole story.

“She said no?”

“She said no!” Vernon responds as he looks at Chaewon with betrayal and confusion stirring around in his eyes. She purses her lips, leaning back into her couch as she waits for the rice to be fully cooked. 

“I expected that.”

“How come she doesn’t like me? Usually all the girls I ask out say yes…” Chaewon rolls her eyes, reaching forward and smacking Vernon on the back of the head. He lets out a hiss of pain, rubbing the back of his head as Chaewon stares at him with a bored expression.

“If you didn’t build that type of reputation, then yn would’ve said yes. You honestly brought this whole rejection upon yourself.” You explain and Vernon lets out a whine, resting his head into his hands. 

“I told her I was going to keep trying.”

“You WHAT?!” Chaewon shouts, standing up from the couch and staring at her cousin with a flabbergasted expression on her face. Vernon slowly raises his head, giving her a nervous smile.

“I like yn a lot. I’ve always thought that she was really cute, smart, and kind, but after hearing you talk about her so much I started to like her even more. That’s why I asked her out on a date.” Vernon mutters, and Chaewon sighs. She sits back down beside Vernon, and rubs the back of her head. 

“God. Help me.”

“I’ve never experienced such a fat whiplash until this very moment.” You mumble to yourself, snapping Chaewon out of her memory. Chaewon lets out a giggle at your comment, and you glance at your best friend. Smiling at the sight of her shaking her head at your obliviousness. 

“At least I know you’re loyal.” Chaewon tells you, and you laugh, nodding your head as you give her a thumbs up. “Besties before stinkies.” 

“Nice one.”

“Order for Changmin!” You announce as you place the macchiato onto the counter. The cute boy comes up and takes his drink, giving you a grateful smile. You nod your head at him before turning back to head to register. 

“Hi! Welcome to Cafe Chuu. How can I help you-” You glance up, words dying in your throat as you lock eyes with Vernon, who happens to have a mischievous smile on his face. You feel heat rushing to your cheeks as he quirks his head to the side at your silence, and you immediately break eye contact. 

“Hi yn.”

“What are you doing here?” You ask through your fake smile, and he chuckles at how cute you are. 

“Just wanted to order coffee from my favorite girl.” Vernon states with full confidence, causing you to squint your eyes at him. To which it does not give the desired effect, for he just warmly smiles at you in response. “How’d you know I work here?”

“Chaewon.”

You grin at him, “Of course!” that traitor.

It’s been two weeks since Vernon asked you out on a date, and he’s continued to ask you that same question every single day since then. Whether it be during your break in between courses, when you’re eating lunch with Chaewon, or when you’re walking towards the bus stop. He’s asked you each and every day, but he would nod his head respectfully and leave right after you’d reject him. Letting you know that he’d try again tomorrow. It’s currently the weekend, and he hasn’t been able to ask you out while you’re at work because he doesn’t know what you do for a living.

so why is he at your workplace right now?!?!?!

“What would you like to order, Vernon?” You ask, and you feel your knees buckle at the small pout he lets out when he glances up to check the board. However, you are a strong. independent, woman who will NOT fall for a playe-

“I’ll have a mocha and a date with you please.” Vernon requests with a smile on his face, and you squeeze the counter until your knuckles turn white. You decide to ignore the last part, instead typing in his order into the computer as your other hand aggressively squeezes the counter. 

“That’ll be-”

“Did you hear what I asked for?” Vernon asks, and you glance up to see him watching you expectantly. You let out a smile, leaning forward onto the counter so that your faces are much closer. 

And this time, you do catch the tips of his ears turning red.

“You asked for a mocha,” You state, pausing as you rip the receipt off the printer. You stretch your hand out towards Vernon with a smile, “Which will be ready in five minutes.”

Vernon slowly takes the receipt from you, finding himself entranced by the sparkles in your eyes having increased tenfold when you smiled at him. You gesture for the next customer to come forward, causing Vernon to have to step to the side to wait for his order. 

He lets out a small laugh, shaking his head as he looks up at you. You catch his eye, feeling a burst of excitement flow through you at the small game of chase going on between the two of you. You won’t lie, it’s entertaining to have the university’s player try so hard to get you to be his. Something you haven’t seen him do before.

which makes you think he’s actually serious.

but alas…

Chan taps your shoulder, telling you to go work on the drinks and you give him a grateful smile. You nod your head, walking over to begin working on the next order, only to find out Vernon’s hasn’t been made yet. You let out a small sigh, before walking over to the coffee. 

Vernon waits by a table, watching with a dopey smile as you prepare his drink. He thinks of different ways to ask you out next, wondering whether or not he should ask Chaewon for help. However, there’s a small part of him that thinks you won’t ever say yes.

but he wants you to know that he’s serious about you.

You place the lid on top of the cup before walking up to the counter. You call out his number, and Vernon looks up and locks eyes with you. Feeling your heart stutter as a smile graces his features as he walks over to you. 

“What do you say about that date?” Vernon asks, brushing his hand against yours when he takes the paper cup from you. You chuckle at him before pursing your lips, thinking of what to say to him. He watches with hopeful eyes, as this is the first time you’ve ever pondered the question he’s asked you. 

let’s see if he’s actually serious, You think to yourself. 

So you smile at the handsome man, “Prove it.” 

Vernon tilts his head to the side, and you hold back your giggle at the confused expression on his face. “Prove it?” 

You nod your head, biting your bottom lip to control your smile from widening. Vernon’s eyes glance down at the action, and he squeezes the cup a bit too tight. 

“Prove that you actually like me. That you’re serious about wanting to date me. Then we’ll see if I’ll give you a chance, because I’m not going to get my heart broken due to your commitment issues.” 

Vernon stares at you with an indecipherable expression on his face, and you think that this is it. This is when he’ll decide that you’re not worth the chase. That he can find someone easier. However, he surprises you when he flashes you an excited grin, a competitive glint to his eyes. 

“You got it baby.” Vernon tells you with full confidence, taking a sip of the mocha before turning around and walking out of the cafe. You let out a breath, raising your hands up to your cheeks as warmth floods through your face. Chan and Soonyoung glance over at you, chuckling at the shock on your face. 

“Yn’s got a boyfriend!” Yeri sings from the sink, and you shoot her a glare. You wave your hands at the three to try and get them to look away, causing them to laugh as you turn away from them to hide your smile. 

“How cute.” Soonyoung says beside you, and you nudge him with your elbow. 

“Shut up!” 

“What’d he get you this time?” Chaewon asks as she sits down beside you in the cafeteria. You point at the unopened boba beside your lunch, and she giggles. She mentally prepares a note to herself to tell Vernon good job on getting yn the right flavor!

“When are you gonna say yes to the poor guy? He’s been bringing you your favorite snacks for the past week of classes. He won’t stop texting me either, getting annoying.” Chaewon tells you, and you smile softly at the fact that he’s actually trying. 

Vernon hasn’t attempted to ask you out on a date since the day he visited you at work. Instead, he’s just been stopping by during your blocks between classes and when you’re at work to bring you your favorite snacks. So far he’s brought you shrimp chips, donuts with rainbow sprinkles on them, hot chocolate, and now boba. If you’re free, then he makes sure to talk to you so that the two of you can get to know one another more. If you’re busy, then he just leaves your snack close to you. However, whether or not you’re free, he’s always attached handwritten notes to each snack, just saying he hopes you have a good day, or that he hopes the snacks bring a smile to your face. 

it’s fucking precious.

“But what if he’s just joking?” You ask Chaewon, the tiny bit of insecurity peeking through. She gives you a comforting smile, reaching her arms around you and giving you a hug. You pout against her shoulder, and she pats your head.

“He’s never been this hung up over a girl before. The way he talks about you? His eyes literally light up. Vernon’s always been afraid of commitment, but he wants to try with you. Everyone on campus thinks he’s serious too, considering he hasn’t been seen with any other girl since he decided he wanted you to be his girlfriend.” Chaewon explains, and you feel warmth rise up your neck at the honesty of her words. You raise your hands to your face, cupping your cheeks and she lets out a coo at how cute you are. She’s about to squeeze your face when you both get interrupted by a familiar voice. 

“Am I interrupting?”

“Vernon?” You ask, immediately dropping your hands from your face. You turn to glance at him, and he gives you a shy smile. Chaewon lets out a little giggle, standing up from her seat to walk to the bathrooms to give the two of you some space. 

“Can I sit here?” Vernon asks you, and you nod your head, gesturing to the empty seat in front of you. He smiles, sitting down and taking a look at your unopened boba. You watch as his eyebrows slightly furrow, and you let out an, ah, and take the straw, giving him a grin.

“I was just about to open it.” You reassure him, and Vernon lets out a breath of relief. He watches you shove the straw into the plastic seal on top, taking a large sip of the milk tea. He smiles when he sees your features light up when the taste hits you. 

“Thank you, it’s my favorite flavor.” Vernon feels his heart go crazy at the realization that this is the first time you’ve actually engaged in conversation with him rather than it being one-sided. He nods his head, “I’m so glad I chose the right one.” 

You smile softly, before glancing back down at your lunch. You take a spoonful of rice and place it into your mouth, avidly trying to distract yourself from internally imploding by Vernon’s presence. While he watches you eat quietly, feeling full now that he’s seeing you eat well. 

You swallow your rice, staying still for a moment as you think of how to phrase what you want to say next. You can be blunt and simply just ask him, or you can slowly go into the topic.

i’ll slowly go into the topic.

“Do you actually like me?” You ask out of the blue, and Vernon’s eyes widen slightly at how straightforward you are.

that was not going into it slowly you stupid bitch.

Vernon nods his head earnestly, and you feel heat rush to your cheeks when he gives you a smile. “I do. I really do.” 

You purse your lips and nod your head, trying to act cool even though you’re internally screaming at the moment. Vernon feels his heart warm, trying to hold back from cooing at how cute you are. He tilts his head to the side, “Do you believe that I genuinely like you?”

You stare at Vernon in silence for a moment, recalling everything he’s done to try and prove himself. How he’s persisted in trying to get you to go on a date with him for the past three weeks. You let out a smile, nodding your head at him.

“Yeah, I do.” You respond, and Vernon stares at you in shock, before his features finally morph into a smile. He bites his bottom lip, nodding his head as he looks up at the ceiling. You giggle as he stands up from the table, taking notice of his very red ears. 

“I’ll call you later so we can talk about our date, okay? You still have the note I gave you with my number on it, right?” You nod your head, and Vernon smiles at the fact that you actually kept the notes he gave you. He raises his hand up and waves at you, and you wave back, giggling at his timidness. 

You watch as Vernon turns around and walks away, letting out a laugh when he raises his hands up and lets out a loud cheer. Which causes everyone in the cafeteria to turn their heads to glance at him, but he doesn’t seem to care. 

“SHE SAID YES!!!”

Chaewon walks back over to you, knowing grin on her face as she watches her cousin throw his arms up in the air one more time before he walks out of the cafeteria. She sits down beside you, taking notice of the bright smile on your face. 

“I take it that you have a date this weekend?” Chaewon begins, and you let out a soft sigh, smile not leaving your features as you nod your head.

“Yeah, I guess I do.”

[recurring-polynya]

Have you ever had an odd moment when rereading/rewatching a story you love and get that feel like you're reading fanfiction?

I'm currently reading Bleach for the first time since watching the anime and, the missing bits from the manga kinda hit different.

It's like the world feels a little more lived in with the way characters emote and goof around. A lot of fun characterization gets lost.

Like Rukia, she wasn't my favorite character, in the anime, she felt like a motherly/older sister type of figure. Sure she does have her silly doodles and her love of bunnies but I got the vibe of action girl with like 2 quirks.

The manga on the other hand, an old man almost scams her, a celebrity absolutely scammed her and she sold out Ichigo. And she's "researching" human culture via horror manga lol.

It just let me see a bit of why the entire bleach fan base is overly protective of her. (It's still a bit scary, but what can you do?) Knowing her backstory already, it's like she's been stressed out over dramatic changing in her life and Rukia finally had a chance to slow down and relax.

And that's something that fanfiction let's readers indulge in. Seeing characters you enjoy goof around and take a breather.

So it's kinda nice to see. 😊

I'm not quite sure I agree with the comparison to fanfic, but it is certainly true that the Bleach anime did a real hack-job on Rukia's character.

I know that it's easy to dismiss the "Studio Pierrot screwed up Bleach!" as a shipper's complaint, because Studio Pierrot absolutely screwed up the minor bits of romance that Bleach actually contains, but the fact is, they screwed up a lot of other stuff, too.

It's really weird, because so much of the time, it's just literally for no reason? @star-snail started to do a really nice analysis of this once, and got exhausted one episode in (I encourage you to read their thoughts on it this sideblog). One example that really sticks with me is that they made Rukia show up earlier in the episode, while Ichigo is interacting with a ghost, whom Rukia ignores. You might say "who cares?" but then that ghost gets eaten by Fishbone, and the end effect is that one of the first things we learn about Rukia is that she's bad at her job.

Another example is this asshat, wholly an invention of the anime:

T(thanks Bleach Wiki for the pic, since I refuse to waste energy on this guy). If you don't remember him, good for you. He shows up in the Memories in the Rain storyline to "help" Rukia and Ichigo fight Grand Fisher. Here is a short list of what's wrong with him:

In the manga, Kubo really slow-plays revealing anything about Soul Society or other Soul Reapers. Take a look at these shots-- the first Rukia thinking about Kaien's death while Ichigo fights Grand Fisher, the second is the first glimpse we see of Byakuya and Renji being sent to apprehend Rukia. Look at the composition, the care Kubo took to make these scenes mysterious and intriguing. Now look up at that guy.

He claims that he was two years ahead of Rukia in school and that she was known as a Kuchiki princess? a) of all, this makes no damn sense because Rukia left school when she was adopted. b) she was only there for 2 months and she was a freshman? Why would this guy even know her? More importantly, though, in the manga, we don't find out that Rukia is Soul Society royalty until Byakuya and Renji show up. Instead, the anime blows all that build-up and dramatic tension by just having this dude... blurt it out? Also, he implies that maybe she was spoiled and stuck up at school? We know nothing about Rukia's life in Soul Society at this point, so as the viewer, we just take this information for granted and... for what? What were they going for?

Memories in the Rain is a story about Rukia allowing Ichigo to fight for his honor, despite Kon begging her to intervene. It's a mysterious fight that is an allusion to her trauma at killing Kaien, and it's a really important character moment, telling you what kind of person Rukia is. Having some other guy there disrupts all of that.

He's gross and makes a bunch of jokes about Rukia and Ichigo being together. Again, for what??

Another bit in the anime that gets re-arranged for absolutely no reason is Prelude for the Straying Stars, the flashback where Renji, Momo, Izuru and Shuuhei are attacked by Hollows during a school training exercise. In the manga, Renji explicitly says they've been at school for 2 months. In the anime, they change it to 6 month. In the manga, the training exercise is to go perform konsou in the Living World, in the anime, it's this elaborate thing with dummy Hollows. In the manga, one person is killed and two are injured, in the anime, there's a slow pan over a group of student corpses, dripping blood. Mostly, I am just mad about this because I tried to write a fanfic about it once and I couldn't figure out any of the details and it made me really mad and I never finished the fanfic. Also, they skipped this for some reason, how dare they.

On the other hand, the anime does include a lot of little character scenes that are great! Ikkaku training Renji! That Academy flashback episode and A Star and Stray Dog, Rukia and Renji's origin story, both contain a lot of extra scenes, which are really nice!

People complain about the anime filler arcs, too, but to be honest, the vast majority of the Karakura kids being pals is from filler. If you have ever enjoyed a story where Rukia is hanging out with Ichigo in Karakuratown after getting her power back, it's not canon!

To be honest, I really like the aspect of Bleach that you can really just pick and choose what you want to be canon. Filler arcs, the movies, the light novels. People on the internet will try to argue that you must accept such-and-such, Kubo approved it, or whatever, but you don't have to accept shit. Zabimaru will only ever be a nue to me, no matter how many people tell me that there was an omake where Kurotsuchi offered to change their gender. I don't care.

Anyway, I'm glad you read the manga, Anon, because, personally, I think it is straight-up better. Rukia is a goddamn dirtbag delight.